Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 222- ?????? (1994)
Episode Date: April 1, 2019You guys, we are so excited for our annual April Fools Day episode where we talk about an absolutely bananas non-horror movie and by god, this year's movie is no exception. Special topics include...we...ll, a lot of cocaine and what you can and can't do in Thailand. You have to listen to the episode to find out the rest. Also...THIS CONCLAVE IS OVER! Did you miss our previous years' April Fools episodes? Check them out: Episode 76- "Days of Thunder," Episode 128- "Over the Top," Episode 170- "Roadhouse" and even though it's not an April Fools episode, go ahead and listen to Episode 209- "Love Actually" anyway. As always, thank you for humoring us and we love you guys. Hope you enjoy it. And as always, thank you to the exceptional Justin Gray (www.burntobuild.com) for the amazing updated logo for this episode. Have you seen this one? What did you think? Let us know your thoughts at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance. You can also email us for our segment "MAILBAG!" at werewolfambulance@gmail.com and if you're feeling super generous, leave us an iTunes rating and review. Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Did you never see this before?
Fuck do I've never seen this?
What do you think?
What do you think?
What do you think?
I've seen it.
It's April Fools.
We're doing what we want. I feel bad. Can I tell you why I feel bad?
Why? This is the fourth year in a row that we've done in April Fool's episode. I don't think we did one the first year.
I don't I think the first year we played it straight. I can't remember. Well we've done four of them. Yeah, that's true. Okay, so we did Days of Thunder. Yes. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. the. the. thease thi. thi's the the the the. th. th. the. the. th. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. ta. ta. ta. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. the top. Definitely me. That was me.
That was me.
Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't take the fall.
We did Roadhouse, you.
Yeah.
So now I drink this.
Yeah.
Definitely my fucking fall.
I don't know if you went back and listened to last week's episode. But when I, the, the, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, the, the, the, the, the, the,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, when I mentioned to you that it's the April Fluits episode, you let out this squeal of joy? That I would be a monster if I didn't
accept whatever you went to the table. Well, did you leave in that I also wanted
to do weekend at Burney's 2? No, I pulled that out. Okay, so we're gonna do weekend at Burnies 2 as a horror movie? Sure, yeah, yeah, the th. We's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, I I's. Yeah, I's. Yeah, I I's. Yeah, I's. Yeah, I I's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th., yeah, yeah, yeah. We're also doing the passion of the Christ.
I've never seen that.
Is there a zombie in that?
Well, it's Christ, isn't it?
Yeah.
He doesn't come back in that movie, so it's fine.
I don't think so.
Wait, is about Gibson Christ?
No.
Okay, good. a Superman. I'm quite what I know what that is. I thought you're a big Superman head. Are you joking? You know, I really do feel left behind. I really do feel left behind by not
knowing superhero stuff because I thought, oh this will be a phase. I don't have to tune in. Oh man, I wish
it was. Yeah, it's not. I think it's a new way of life. Speaking of superheroes. What the fuck are we doing this week? The real. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I thue. I thus. I want th. I want thus. I want thi. I thus. I'm thus. I'm thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I thi. I thi. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I the to to to to the the to the to to the the theuu the theu theu theu theu theu the the the the of superheroes. What the fuck are we doing this week? The real superheroes.
Before we get started, I want to shout out that everyone should make sure to check out the
episode art for this one because I texted Justin Gray and I was like, dog, we're doing Street Fighter.
Can you please put our logo, our werewolf on M. Bison's body?
And he was like, give me a half an hour.
And then I got a text back and he went, movie or video game.
And I said, do video game.
Yeah. I like the bit of it. Yeah. We're doing Street Fighter. Thank you.
He's a god-thing for thin.
Thank you for dropping whatever you're doing to do this incredibly stupid thing for us.
He's the best.
He is the best.
We're doing Street Fighter.
The 1994 Live Action Street Fighter, Stephen DeSuzza film.
Yes.
This poor man.
This poor man.
Writer had one and two.
He wrote Running Man, which is, you know what, I like action movies because I fucking love Running Man, which is great.
He was involved in Commando, another great action movie.
All before this.
This was his downfall.
I think he also wrote Judge Dred, which had some success commercially but is critically
pan.
Yeah, it's terrible.
This movie ruined the man.
It made triple what it cost to make. Overseas.
Still, it was a $35 million movie and it made almost $100 million.
There is a very good long form article on Polygon that details everything that went wrong with this movie.
And I debated whether to send it to you before we did this episode,
but I didn't want you to be jaded by knowing how terrible everything actually was.
I mean, there's no way I was going into this going, hmm, the Citizen Kane of Video Game Punch them up movies.
So I think the thing we need to address first is that the beautiful creature, Raul Julia,
Yeah, this is his last work. And he is acting the fuck out of it. It gives it 110%. He deserved better for
his last film. He did, yeah, apparently, I guess it wasn't put out in the media, but apparently
he was suffering from some form of cancer at the time. Yeah. He had surgery, like right
before they made this movie. And they didn't know. And so he showed up looking like a ghost. So for like the beginning of the scenes they like basically pushed all his the scenes the th th th th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th, th, th, their, th, the, the the the, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, te, te, te. te. tea. tea. tea. tea. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. the, the, the, t movie and they didn't know. And so he showed up looking like a ghost. So for like the beginning of the scenes,
they like basically pushed all his scenes to the end
and they just like took him and his kids to Australia
where they filmed the beginning like parts of this movie
and just fattened him up.
Oh, okay.
And he would like watchthis movie because his kids were big fans of the Street Fighter video game.
The Street Fighter video game was fucking amazing.
Yeah.
Did you, you weren't an arcade guy?
Are you?
I mean, I was but previous to this.
Yeah.
Like I would have tapped out by the end of the 80s.
Yeah.
The arcade by my home, uh, time out. Okay. If you brought in your report card, they would give you tokens for every A you got. Which is a really cool little thing that they did, but I was a straight A student, you know,
so I would just fucking load up on those tokens and I would play those fucking video games.
That's awesome.
I love Street Fighter.
Yeah.
I don't love it anymore.
Yeah. behind you or a no deck building game? That is a deck building game I don't know what that means.
It's a card card. I think it's like magically gathering. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh well what's that down there? Is that all that's also Street Fighter? It is? I don't know what that is.
We're in my house this week. I had a, I have a very like, I know the street fighter exists and I knew like a couple, I knew M. Bison's name.
Sure. What is it, Zangef? Yeah. For some reason his name was one that was stuck in my head.
The Russian wrestler. And Blanca? Yeah. And I was like, you know how they got to do Blanca?
Eh, they're not really gonna. They're gonna make him look like the Incredible Hulk's Irish cousins shows up real
quick.
Oh boy, so like everything in this movie is terrible, right?
Can we just like, let's just hold hands and walk down the path of this movie?
Of how terrible it is.
Okay, we can't do a plot summary. Because there isn one. Well, there is. So M. Bison.
M. Bison has taken a bunch of people hostage. Basically, they're A.N. Allied Nations aid
workers, they're innocence. Which is apparently the violent arm of the United Nations.
Yes. He has taken them hostage for how much Alan do you remember
how much? Twenty billion dollars. Twenty billion dollars. He has them in a pit
that he calls the hostage pit which I like a lot. Which the robot voice
announces as closing the hostage pit. They're like me and you close in the pit.
And... The hostage pit is just right in the middle of the room where everybody
works by the way. Right, right, right. Everyone's just is just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just pit is just right in the middle of the room where everybody works, by the way.
Right, right, right. Everyone's just walking over the hot thipit all day, like, the coffee pots on top of it.
And... Can you throw me a scone? I do not want to walk over the hot touch pit.
The pit? What if he opens it?
And they need to be rescued by this representative of the military the military of the military of the military of the military of the military of the military the military the military the military the military the military the military of the military the military the military the military of of the military arm of the Allied Nations, Gile the American, Jean-Claude Van Damme. Probably the most famous Belgian
person who's ever lived. I would say so, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but
a raging cocaine habit. Which I assume is at its peak during this movie? So this movie was a
trifecta of things for him. Yeah.
He's got a raging cocaine habit.
His third divorce and an affair with Kylie Minogue.
Oh, hello.
Who looks gorgeous in this movie?
You have no idea how excited I got what I saw the Kylie Minogue was in this movie.
I think she's great.
She was a soap actor. She's done a bunch of songs with, or at, or at couple songs with Nick Cave, who's one of my favorite artists, so I got really excited.
I know you love Nick Cave. Every time you say it. Yeah. I think you're gonna say Nick Cage.
She did a couple songs with Nick Cage. They're uh, I would listen to that. You would too. You would too. You would listen to the to me. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th- I'm closing my eyes, go. Then a member of the UN started talking about Kim Jong-un.
And was like, oh, dickhead, I'm coming for you.
And then he was like, hang on, Charlie, you're a hostage, and we're coming for you.
And then Kim Jong-un was like, Carlos.
Charlie! That is not a nickname for Carlos. I love that. Carlos
Charles Charlie. I have the notes Carlos equals Charlie followed by Kiley.
also what's up with Vegas outfit? I don't know, but Vega is extremely handsome.
Oh, and he knows it.
I mean, that's Vegas thing.
Oh, is it?
Is that where he wears the mask?
That's why he wears the mask?
Is he wears the mask?
Also, that poor actor gets no line, he gets two lines, and both of them are A-D-D-R. you never see him speak. thahahahahahah. that's him him him him him him him him. Oh. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. I I I I I I I I I I I is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's this, are all the characters from the video game represented in this movie?
Yes, there are 15 of them.
Apparently, Stephen DeSuzza was like, you can't have more than seven.
An audience can only keep seven characters in line at one.
Seven, name all the seven dwarfs and nobody could do whatever, like seven.
And they were like, Capcom was like, 15. He was likecom was like uh-uh 15 so all 15 characters are in this movie like
Like doll seam the yoga
Fighter is just the doctor like and then somehow at the end he's bald and I don't know why he got burnt up in the fire is that what happened? I don't?
Is that what happened and he I don't I don't do you know why you know that actor? No, I don't.
He is the intermediary to the prince in Temple of Doom.
Yes, he is.
Oh my god, I love Temple of Doom.
I talk about it all the time.
Can I tell you about the other three actors that I was excited about being in this movie. Kylie Minogue. Kylie Minogue is Kylie Fucking Monogue.
Miguel Nunez Jr. Who's that? He is DJ. He has so little to work with. He does a
minor street fighter anyway. He does a great job with it. Yeah. Especially he was like, I
could go back to Jamaica. Those are bison dollars. He was spider in return of the living dead. Oh, okay.
Yeah.
And the other one will be a little less exciting for you.
It's a grand bush who is...
That's not a name.
It's a name.
He is, what is the, uh, he's ballrog?
Oh, okay.
And he is agent Johnson.
He's one of the two agent Johnson's that are in Die Hard.
Oh, okay, yeah. Oh, okay.
Yeah, I gotta watch that.
Yeah.
Next April Fools.
His hairline is ballrog.
No, we're gonna do a patron, Patreon where we do action movies.
I think people will pay for it.
Yeah.
Either action movies or romantic.
We could alternate.
Yeah. What will you pay us to do, I guess, is our question. We are not, we are not, no, we'll do whatever.
Yeah.
So, okay, so let's just go through all the street fighters really quickly.
You named DJ.
He works for M. Bison, who's Rauljouli,
the teem also works for a bison, but he appears to be there under duress.
Yeah, he's chained up. also works for him and he is extremely stupid. He was great. Yes. He was heartwarmingly good.
I was like, that actor should be in more stuff.
Yeah.
I know.
Is he a wrestler?
He looks like a pro wrestler.
He does.
He doesn't.
I don't think he is.
Sir, may I recommend pro wrestling?
OK, then you've got. OK, then you've got Chunnell. the world. the world. the world. the world. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that actor. that actor. that actor. that actor. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that........................................................... very good. She was great. I thought she was great.
She works with E. Honda, who is inexplicably Hawaiian instead of Japanese?
Mm-hmm.
Ballrog previously mentioned.
And then you've got Saugat and Vega, who are pals.
And then you've got Ken and Ryu.
And apparently they called him Ryu, because the actor who was playing Ken couldn't say Ryu as though it were a difficult phonetic
pronunciation. Oh jeez. Yeah. And then you've got Cammy Gile.
Teahawk who looks fucking like Donald Trump Jr.
Did you take that back? Did you think he looked like Donald Trump Jr? He looked just fucking like him.
Until he put his hair down.
Oh, he was so upsetting.
I liked at the end when they all had their street fighter costumes on.
I guess this doesn't mean anything to you, does it?
When they all posed the end, I was like, okay, okay, that's probably from the video game. Well as the game, as the movie goes on, in the last scene somehow they all
come into their like costumes that they wear in the game. Yeah. Yeah. Like some for some reason
Teahawk is suddenly wearing a Native American headband. I do appreciate that he was actually played
by a Native American actor. Yes, Donald Trump Jr. Greg Rainwater. Okay. Vega is also a Native American
actor. He's like a big Native American actor. He's like a big
Native American activist, but he plays a Spanish man in this movie. What about
Captain Sawada? Is he? No, he has nothing to do with that. He was an actor that they
like insisted on hiring and they wanted him to be Ryu and he like couldn't
learn English I guess I don't know. So he's dubbed. That's why he like he like shows up and he says something and like really stilted. Why. Why. Why. to. to. to. to. to. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be to be. th. the the th. the the th. the th. the the they. they. they. th. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the the the the the the the the they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. th. He's th. But, th. thi. But, thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. th. But th. But th. But th. So he's dubbed him. That's why he like shows up and he says something and like really stilted English and like why? Why are you? He has no need
to be in this movie? Well it's a Japanese American production. So like I guess that's what and
like which actually helps because later on there was a thing that was like oh is that racist? And then I read that it was a Japanese American thing. No, it's okay. No. No. No. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's a it's it's it's it's it's it's it's a that's like it's a that it's a that it's a Japanese. It's a Japanese. It's a Japanese. It's a Japanese. It's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's no. It's no. It's no. It's a. It's a. It's a. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's okay. It's fine. So, okay, so M. Bison, Raulia, has taken these hostages hostage for $20 billion.
And it's up to Jean-Claude Van Dam to get them back.
After we call someone dick in.
I guess.
Yes.
Yeah.
He does.
Oh, I went to ask you.
Is this a storyline? Like does a video game have a story like the thia. th. thia. th. thia. thia. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. So, th. th. thi. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yes, th. Yes, this a storyline? Like does the video game have a storyline?
The video game is just like, punchy boys get punchy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
I think in the newer versions, like everybody has individual storylines,
but I don't know them and I don't care.
We learn that M. Bison is taken over Shadalu.
This is the country.. thi that Mison that Mison that Mison Bison Bison Bison that Mison that Mison that Mison that that that that that that thiisenbyisenbyisenbyisenbyisnison that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that thison is that that thison thison. I thison. I that that that that that that that Mison. I that Mison. I that Mison. I that Mison. I that Mison. I that Mison. I that Mison. I that Mison. I that Mison. I that that that that thiiiiiiiiiii thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi ti ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty thi ty thi called Shadaloo. Shadaloo. Is that Xanadu?
Oh no, it's a Waterloo, Mama.
Just that I asked.
And Sagat, I guess works for him?
Sagot looks cool. He looks cool. He looks cool. He's a good actor. Yeah.
He is buying arms from Ken and Ryu.
Yeah. Who are selling nerve guns? I don't know how they thought that was going to work.
But I was also like when they first, so, uh, so got onto them and he has the guns picked up and
brought to the place where the deals going down rather than them walkie talking into him later to pick them up. Right. Right. So, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, uh, uh, so, uh, the the the the th. So, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their. the, the, their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the, the, the place where the deal's going down rather than them walkie-talking into him later to pick them up. Right. So when he fires the ball
guns at them and they're like, off them, I was like, is this movie gonna be the
cutest movie I've ever seen? Everyone's just shooting little fake guns
at each other? The answer is no, but they also seemed like genuinely kind of scared of those ball. They knew they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th. th. th. th. they they they the. they the. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. So. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. theded. thed. thed. thed. thed. thed. thed thed thed theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeared. So, thed They knew what they were. I know. Everyone knew what they were
because the barrel had to fit a tennis ball. What are you going to shoot out of there?
Grenade launchers. Yeah. And that would be detrimental to everyone involved. Meanwhile.
Meanwhile. There's a lot of Meanwiles in this movie. Because there are 15 characters.
M. Bison has gotten Dr. Dahlseem to make Charlie, Carlos,
into a super soldier monster,
which he does by showing him videos of like bad stuff,
and also by using DNA mutagens that are the color of highlighters.
Yeah, I was like, why they put him catering that boy.
I don't know, he gets super electroted and his muscle mask gets really big.
They keep saying how big his muscle mass has gotten and then he comes out and I'm like, nah,
dog.
He's kind of buff, you know?
You're not even like a, uh, like Chris You know? Zankief is a monster. He is a monster.
And all that fake Chester, Lydia?
I love that.
So, but like, there are just all these cheeky lines,
like, doll seems like doing this under duress and M. Bison's like,
we'll see about getting you published.
That should share you up, which is just like, like Rall Julia delivering this with like this gravitas and majesty that like
I feel like only a particular kind of actor can muster. Have you ever seen the
Overdrawn at the Memory Bank episode of Mystery Science Theater? Which one?
Overdrawn at the Memory Bank? No. It's Rall Julia in like a public
television movie that's like this sci-fi movie about people who have their
essences put into like monkeys.
And his... Like Monkey Shines? Sort of. But his essence gets stuck in like the Matrix and all this like
Hullablu that happens. And he is bringing Raul Julia to that. So I don't think he has any other setting
but like I'm gonna be fucking amazing. Yeah, I'm Gomez Adams.
Sorry about you.
Yeah.
I was thinking we should do a fucking Adam's family movie.
Oh, I love those movies.
Those are horror movies.
As much as like Beetlejuice is like they're horror adjacent.
Those are children's movies.
No.
Yeah, thanks.
The's a true. We should do another
we should do another. We should do another no-cursees. I'll work really hard at it.
Poughkeepsie.
Poughkeepsie.
So yeah, like, yes, he's like promising him to get published and then like cut to like just the weird shit like Chun Lee and the
other two dudes what is it Honda and Balrog yeah are they're posing as a
news team or they they are a news team legitimately are a news team I'm sorry
in my opinion and then they like are posing as a circus act yeah they have
like down pat and where do they get those costumes?
I don't know.
I don't know.
Like what do you think every day was showing up on the set?
I don't know and oh you mean of this movie?
Yeah. I'll send you the article you can read it.
Apparently terrible they all lost a lot of weight. They like worked really hard. The stuuuu. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they were th. th. they were they were th. th. they were they were tho. they were they were they were th. they were they were they were they were they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. they were. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. toge. t. t. toge. t. t. toge. th. th. they were. they were. they were worked really hard. The stunts were terrible and the food was terrible and everybody got sick.
Oh.
Yeah, it was awesome.
I wanted it to be really fun for everybody.
You know the whole thing was, well and also like they were in, eventually in Thailand
and all of these men were just like running fucking wild.
Oh shit.
But let's look at it from the fictional perspective. What's it like being on Chunley's camera crew?
I don't know.
Like, when she has to go out in the middle of the day and she puts on a ninja suit, why?
Chunley, Ninja Reporter?
It's broad daylight.
I think my favorite scene in the movie is when she puts on the ninja suit and like drops down into this building in the middle of the day and she finds the morgue and she goes in and she finds John Claude Van Damm's body
he's just been laying there why why was he just laying there seemingly waiting
for her to show up yeah why he didn't know she was gonna come he didn't
know how long did he be in the morgue it's refrigerated it did like her breath the breath is showing cold maybe I don't thi to tho the the the the the the the th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the th th th th I th thi thi the to th I to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the th the the th the the the the th th th th the th th th the th the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the the theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee theee the the the the the little map. It's easier to nap when it's cold.
I don't think that's true.
Oh, I definitely do.
Uh, when she goes out into the morgue,
and like, she's a very beautiful woman.
Oh, yeah.
And she gets down there and she's like, I should probably take this head thing off
so that you can see how beautiful I am with my hair and stuff.
Yeah, and then she gets the tunnely little buns that she has.
Right, because Bison puts her in that suit according to this, according to this movie.
Can we talk about M. Bicin's plan?
Yeah, what are you walking through it? has this very beautiful altruistic view of the world, that when he eradicates
all other ways of thinking, the world will be perfect, he will build the
Bisonopolis. I love it! Do you love that the model looks like a shitty like
community meeting or building them all? Yeah, until they go up above it and it's
the M. Bison like crest that's on his helmet or hat.
Oof.
And he's also says things like the food court should be larger because all the big franchises will want it.
You're building a food court in your country? That's not how food courts work. That's not how countries work.
Speaking of food courts, have you seen all these freestanding Panda Express that have been popping up? What? You know the food court restaurant Panda Express? Yeah. There are now like solo
Panda Express buildings that have been parted. Like they're in Pittsburgh? Where? There is one over
in Aspenwall. That's bizarre. And I've never seen anyone in it and I'm like, what are you doing? You can't go rogue?
Why would you go in a Panda Express if you weren't at the mall or in. the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food. the food. the food. the food. Yeah. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food food food food food food food food food food food food. the food food food. the food. the food food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the the the the food. the the the the the the the the the the the food. the the the the the food restaurant. the food restaurant. the the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the food. the the That's bizarre. And I've never seen anyone in it. And I'm like, what are you doing? You can't go rogue?
Why would you go in a Panda Express
if you weren't at the mall or in an airport?
Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't know.
It's like going to like, I just got a pop over to the Mrs. Field
that.
You know it. He says that. Pax by Sonica.
He says that.
He says that.
Packs by Sonica.
Okay, so he's got Saugot, right?
And instead of paying him for the arms, he's like, listen, I'm going to share control
of the country with you.
Yeah.
Here's some money.
Here's let me show you some money.
They're going to be worth every bison dollars. Bison bucks. They're going to be worth, every dollar, every bison dollar is going to be worth five British
pounds after he kidnaps their queen.
It's so good.
That's such a great plan.
Why does he say?
I just have to know what this is.
Ha ha ha, that's great news, general.
I don't know what this is, ha ha ha, that's great news, general. I'm morn. I don't know. I don't know what that means.
Oh, did you see, did you, did you hear the really sick dig at the Iraqi army?
No, tell me.
So this would have been right after Operation Desert Storm, or like a couple years after Operation Desert Storm.
And someone's like, oh, we bought these jeeps from Iraqi. They're five speed, two forward, three in reverse.
Ooh.
I miss that.
And also, ouch.
Oh my God.
I think the problem with this movie is that.
Woof.
At points it decided it was a comedy.
Like, when they're in the news van, Um, Y is reading a book called Shadaloo on $25 a day. But then at other
points it's really sincere. Like they put a homing beacon on the prison van as it gets away, right? Yeah, that's got
cannon and Ryu. I can't say it. Okay, fine.
And suddenly he's like, well we're probably not the only ones to have put a
homing beacon on it. Yeah. Who else did? Like why? Who? When? When you were there?
You put the homing beacon there? You did a little, a little somersault. I saw you do it. Did you see anyone else do it? thin? thin. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're th. th. oh, there's another one. But it's also like, how fucking stealth is your equipment if it has to
beep for you to find it? When you're a ninja? Why are you wearing that if your shit is beeping?
Oh my god. Then she runs away and Donald Trump Jr. And looks out the window and he goes, what a screw up. Who are you talking to, Donald Donald th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin the the the the thin, the the the the the the the the the thu thu thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th. thin thin thin thin thin thin, no thin, no thin, no the the the thin, the the theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the the the the up. Who are you talking to, Donald Trump, Jr.?
How did they get booked as the performers for that event in the circus?
They were, they were the dinner entertainment.
They were.
And they're also like using barrels, let's say Capcom on them, which are like the barrels
that you break in the game.
My auto correct on my tablet at one point said they caught Chunnel? Chunnel? Good enough.
Oh man.
So, um, uh, Gile is like, all right, I gotta go fucking do this.
And I'm gonna be the guy who does it because, he says at one point he's like, um, he's talking
to Chunley and she's like, I have a personal vendetta. He's like, this isn't about your vendetta. It th. It th. It's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Good. Good. Good. thi. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good, thi. Good, thi. Good, to, good, good. Good. Good. Good. Good, to, good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. th. Good. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the th. th like, he's talking to Chun Lee and she's like, I have a personal vendetta.
He's like, this isn't about your vendetta.
It's about my vendetta.
But what is his vendetta?
Is it just Charlie?
Yes, Charlie?
Carlos, Charlie.
Okay, so apparently he was supposed to, I mean, he was supposed to, I mean, you know what guy all looks like, he's the, tha, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, tho, tho, tho, and, and, and, and, thi, thi, thi, and he, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. t to. t to. t t t terrible. I mean, you know what Gail looks like.
He's the blonde, American with like the American flag tattoo.
And when they reveal his, it's definitely done a sharpie.
It looks so shitty.
Yeah.
I guess he was just like, they would have like 7.30 calls and he would just not be there.
You're doing cocaine, snorny snor and get out there and do your business. Just wasn't doing it. Cocaine Kylie Minogue out.
So he's like, all right, so I'm gonna take this dumb looking jet boat and like 20 people,
we're gonna go in the front door.
Because the Thai government was like, the fuck you're not flying planes around here.
Yeah, because they make it look like a jet and he puts on a jet suit to true. Yeah, they were like, the guy who was like, you absolutely cannot fly a plane over there.
That's hilarious.
And he, and then he's like, and then like,
oh, the other million people are gonna come in from the top,
and it's gonna be fine.
Can we talk about stealth boats?
the one and only, yes.. The the one, the only only, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Because, yes. Because, yes. Because, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, and he, and he, and he. And he. And he, and he. And he. And he, and he, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, and he. And, and means. You can't pick it out. Why couldn't they see it on the video footage? Just the wake.
It doesn't make any sense. No, it's stupid. Luckily, Bison has driven me crazy. Okay, John
Claude. When he's talking to, so as he's, perpretely, he's giving this really dumb speech to his,
his cohort. Because the war has been canceled.
Because members of the A.N. have shown up and like, yeah, we're gonna negotiate
because we're a peace organization.
This is what we do.
We're just gonna give him $20 billion.
What? You're not?
And he's like, the higher ups don't want to fight because they lost their balls.
It's like...
Everyone's wearing double-breasted suits too, which just makes everyone look like a dick,
but I feel like I knew that guy from something.
Did you know him?
Oh yeah, he was somewhat familiar.
Yeah, for sure.
I mean, there are so many actors that I recognized in this movie.
Did you like when they were showing around, around Chun Lee gets caught by M. Bison and he's like much like everybody in this movie once M. Bison is like down with Chun Lee.
Oh yeah, real beautiful. So he goes back and changes into his like military smoking jacket and
but it's on a smoking jacket hat which I really appreciated. Did you like his hat rack?
I did. They were all the same hat in different colors. Why was there a painting of him as the clown John Wayne Gacy? I don't know, but it was that style. It was meant to be that. I mean it was, it was that painting
just with the M. Bison hat like shiably drawn on top of it. I don't know. But that is such a
specific like for like people like us. Creeps. Yeah. Do you like that thing about her speech about like my father died by villagers. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. the village. to. to. they. to be like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, they. I. they. they. I. they. they. they. they. they. they. the. the. the. that, the. that, that, they. the. t. I. I. t. I. t. you like that thing about her speech about like my father died protecting our village
and you were run off with by villagers with pitchforks and he was like the day M. Bison
came to your town was the most important day of your life. For me it was Tuesday.
Is this the first time that's happened? Because that's like a thing that people say.
What do you mean? There was that recent awful shooting in New Zealand. Oh, the most recent terrible shooting.
I saw that like people were like, oh, this is the most horrible day in New Zealand.
In America, we call it Friday.
Ugh.
But it was just like...
I wonder.
It's like...
Oh, I hope that's nothing.
Good Street Fighter read the movie.
The genesis of that phrase. God I hope I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is th. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. th. the. th. the most. the most. the most. man, I really hope it is. Meanwhile, meanwhile,
this is very back at the ranch. Meanwhile, meanwhile.
Uh, ballrog and E. Honda have been taken captive and they're, this guy is beating
E. Honda with like a switch. That seems terrible. It was terrible. And he says, here's how we treat foreigners in Shadaloo. And he seems to be, I don't know, Polish. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, th. th. th. th. thi. thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, th. th. this, this, this, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is this is this is, this is, this is this is, this. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. This. this. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. That scene was terrible. It was terrible. And he says, here's how we treat foreigners in Shadaloo. And he seems to be, I don't know, Polish? Where is Shadalu?
What? But like the whole- Also in that scene, Balrog looks straight at the camera, which
I really enjoy. We rewound it and watched it again, because he's like laughing with the camera and goes, ha ha ha. I'm laughing with laughing together and we the just looks at the camera and goes, ha ha ha ha. I'm laughing with all of you as well.
We're all laughing together. Let's all laugh.
But E. Honda, he's just taking all of the hits from the, like,
he's getting switched in the back with a cane.
And he's just like kind of laughing it off and picking his teeth.
And then when the guy walks out, they're both they're both they're both. Ooh, and he's like, yeah, as of sumo, like, yeah, you gotta separate your mind from your
body, I guess, is that a thing you do?
Next time your body goes out, can it bring back a pizza?
Cut to the next scene.
But then, like, we got back to them later, and he's like, one of them says to the other,
and the other says, we've only been in jail two hours, and I was like, wrote this? For the minute, two hours, wait another month.
I'm gonna jerk you off, dog, just wait a month.
Not for 30 days, not for a lunar cycle.
I actually really appreciated that joke.
I think a lot of the jokes are funny.
And through all of this, Blanca is still in the cabinet that baking him into the Hulk's Irish cousin.
So when I was in college, I did a smoking study, which was a great way to earn money as a
smoker.
They did a lot of cigarette studies at the university that I attended.
And I did one of these where they sat me in a chair in a dark room and gave me,
I had to bring my own cigarettes. It was how you to bring your own a the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their to to their to to their own to their own to their own their own to to to to to toeauau. I'm toeuroeuroe. I to to to toeuroe. I was to to to to to to to smoke. I was to smoke smoke smoke. I was to smoke smoke smoke smoke. I to smoke smoke. I to smoke. I to smoke. I to smoke. I to smoke. I to smoke. I to smoke. I to smoke. I to smoke. I to smoke. I to to smoke. I to to their their their their their their own their own their own their own their own thi. I'm thi. I'm thia. thia. Scoooooooooombs. Sc. I'm toea. Sc. Sc. Sc. Sc. Sc. S study. So they're not providing you Marlboro Lights.
Just Virginia slips.
You had to bring your own Marlboro lights.
Right.
And they would show me videos of like fucked up stuff and see how much I smoked during
them.
And then the next time they showed me videos of like happy stuff. And then the third one was like, just new, like a pictures of chairs and ha, their, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, a.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the hammers and like yeah day to day stuff to see how much you was smoked during it which is like you clearly knew
what the study was like I knew as soon as I got in there and they showed me a
picture of a corpse what what they were doing yeah but I feel like that was a?
they I have a dream speech yeah it was nice it was like they turned him good and they just show them pictures of like weddings and children? And believe the I have a dream speech. Yeah, it was nice.
It was like, well I guess I'm okay.
Sort of, but he only gets like half his brain back.
Yeah, well they wasn't on there for very long.
It's so stupid.
I mean, we're all over the place, but so is this movie. I did like like like like like like like like th like th like th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. And he. th. th. And he. And he. And he. And th. And he. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And, th. And, th. And, thi. And, thi. And thi. And, thi. And thi. And thi. And thi Wayne Gacy painting. He also had a bone chandelier.
Did you like that?
And a skull fireplace that was his own laughing face.
I did not notice that?
Yeah, it was very good.
There were a lot of like bone wall art in this, and bison's in Bison's their own. And I don't know if that's a street fighter thing or not, but I don't think thin, I don't thin, I don't thin, I don't thin, I don't thin, I don't thin, I don't thin, I don't thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, and I don't thin, and I'm th. thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, and a thi, and a thi, and a thi, and a thi, and a th. Yeah, and th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi. Like, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, like, like, like, like fighter thing or not, but I don't think so. You figure all them punches, a bunch of skeletons are going to fall out of people. I guess so. You got punch
skeleton right out of somebody. In the Japanese version of the game, Ballrog and M. Bison
are switched. So M. Bison is the boxer. Because he's Mike Tyson, if you get that. Oh, wow. Yeah. So I don't know if that's like that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's a that's a that's a that's a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I's. I's. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I thea. I's. I the the. I don't know if that's like a, I don't know, I don't know if it's punching a skeleton out of someone or not.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah, and Bison is Mike Tyson,
which makes this movie a lot stupider when you look at it that way.
I don't think it could.
This is a mad stupid movie.
I have to be honest.
I don't feel like you liked this movie. I watch this movie back to back with the next week's movie.
It was an interesting day for me today.
Who are you most mad at?
No, there you.
I love you both.
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah. There's a lot of ha haught notes in here. All thu. th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. this. this. this is. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It is. It is. It is. It is. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's is. It's th. It's a th. It's a th. th. th. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. um, stupid lines, like your ass is six months
overdue. What does that mean? I don't, it's something that fucking, fucking
Koki McHolkerson said. Your ass is six months overdue. What if your ass was
pregnant and it's gestated for six months longer than it was supposed to.
It would be enormous. You couldn't sit down.
With your pregnant ass. Did you appreciate that when Mbison had to fight to fight to fight to fight the good the good to fight the good the good the good the good the good to fight the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good the good to fight the good the good thoys. thoooids thoes thoes thooes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tho. to to to to to to toe too. toe tooo. toe tooo. toe too. toe. toe. thoo. tho. tho. tho ass. Did you appreciate that when M. Bison had to
fight the good guys, the A-N,
it was they were raiding his compound,
he did it on the street fighter control panel?
Yes, I did. I loved that it was an arcade joystick.
And I also love that Rale Julia did all that wire work.
He did that.
Oh, the was not a double. He fucking did that. Flying Royal Julia is a god damn joy. Oh God, I just feel like he deserves so much
better for his last hurrah. I mean what are you going to go out on really?
Why not go out on this? He was a legitimate celebrity. Sure.
So was so was Kylie Minogue? She was gigantic. She's not dead. That's the thing. She's alive. Although I think this ruined this this this this this this this this this was this was this is this is this is this is th. this is th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. tho. tho. the the the the the the the they. the the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. G. tole. G. tole. G. t. the the they. they. they. the thing. She's alive. Although I think this ruined John Claude Van Dam for a while, too.
Yeah.
But I think he did that to himself with all the cocaine.
Do you like when he said, I didn't do four years of ROTC for this shit?
What does that even mean? Didn't you do more than that?
ROTC is just a college course?
Aren't you in all all the military? Yeah, wouldn't you, weren't you a colonel, sir? So while Chunley is trapped in the John Wayne Gacy room with M. Bison, which
I would now call it that room, she starts kicking his ass. Yeah, she's got that fast kick.
Yeah, yeah. That's Chunley's move. Oh, she's like a td-duh. Yeah. I was always Chunny because she's like, I. the only girl player. Oh really? Or the only girl character, yeah. Not Cammy? Cammy didn't come in until Super Street Fighter.
So there's a little, I played a lot of Street Fighter too.
Gotcha.
Gotcha.
And then someone opens a door behind her.
She gets distracted and he, and M. Bison is able to run into a closet and turn
on gas to knock everybody out. And they're they they they's, they's, they's, they's, they's, they's, they's, I they's, I they's, I their, I, I, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I' their, I' their, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I've, I'. th, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've a little, I've a little, I've a little, I've a little, I've a little, I th. So, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. I the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I've. th. th. th. th. thi. thi, I've ttogether. together. together, I've together, I've together, I've together, I've together. together, I've together. too. the. I've what they get captured. No, yeah. And he like just laughs into the window, which I liked a lot. Oh God, he is just acting so hard
and I appreciate every moment of it. So sort of the culmination of this film is like all of our
heroes descending on M-bickeyev's the combathe his...
It's a common crew of idiots. I want to know how him and Zangef got together.
That's a good question.
Zangief is very stupid.
He has some of the funniest lines in this movie though.
He does.
And I just feel like, because he turns good at the end.
Yeah, oh, wait, we're the band guys?
Yeah, he was like so bummed on that.
He also wasn't getting paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid paid. Did you like when DJ said I should have stayed at Microsoft? That's a very funny joke for 1994. It's a really good. Because the Windows 95 was about to come out.
Can you imagine how much money DJ would have now if he'd stayed at Microsoft, he'd have so much
stock? Yeah? Yeah. Instead of just a bucket full of bison bucks. He turned up better than when he got blown up at the end of the living dead? Does he? Yeah, they droped they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they their they their they their they'd their their their up their up their up their up their up thed up thed up thed up th. Yeah? Yeah? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, th. Yeah? Yeah. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I. I. I. I. I'd th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their. th. th. their. th. their. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. to to te. too. too. too. too. too. the. the. the. the. the. the. the at the end of the return of the Living Dead. Does he?
Yeah, they drop a nuclear bomb on the Louisville.
Look, you have to remember that I don't know anything about that movie.
Come here to fight a madman instead you'd found a god.
That's a mind from this movie.
Listen, Doug, just because you can shoot them lightning balls out of your hand and kind
of fly around.
Well, apparently there were supposed to be a lot more special effects in this movie, like
Hadukins and all of that, like the fireballs that Ken.
Yeah, what is the Hadukin?
It's a fireball that they fucking ran out of time. This movie was supposed to be released on like December
23rd and there just wasn't time. They were like no effects then. It's terrible.
Because doesn't it, um, yeah, doesn't that Blanca guy like kind of like shoot
around the screen? Yeah, he can like tum nothing. He was good at nothing. Blanco was such a right off in this and I feel like that's so disappointing.
It's probably because you saw that, that, those wedding videos in the video of a child.
I like the doll scene was like, I got these cued up.
Click, click, click, click, click, click. Now you're fine. If they made the movie now, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. He th. He's, th. He, th. He, th. He, th, th. He, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. He th. He th. He th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. thi. thi. thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. Now you're good. Now you're fine. If they made the movie now, they would just send him, he would just link to the Dodo.com and it'd be like puppies like getting saved
from something. Do you like that Sean Claude Van Dam was just going to put a bullet in
his best friend's head? He was going to mercy kill someone who didn't ask for it. That's
actually called murder. Do you like when John Clarence gets into the jet boat, the flying plane boat, the
stealth fighter, they just took the wings off of and made a boat. Oh God help.
When he gets in there, he's like I got to remind myself of what I'm doing, it puts
a home movie in the jet plane screen. How did he have that? And how were they watching?
Everyone else in the boat is just looking at it too. Donald Trump Jr. and Kylie Minogar was just looking at it. And it's not, it's like,
it's them having dinner. Yeah, well who was filming it? Who was filming it and why did he have it?
And then he's like so touched by this like this is his best friend, this is his man, this is the guy he's going to. He sees him and he's like, and he's like, and he's like, and he's like, and he's like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the, this is his man, this is a guy he's going to rescue. He sees him and he's like, I'll put a bullet between your eyes. I don't fucking care.
I don't know, man.
You come out of that chamber with that much brow ridge,
we're gonna have to have a talk of mercy killings.
It seemed like Dahlseem could have dialed him back.
Exactly.
You know what I just don't know. So we get to this like ultimate scene where
M. Bison's like, all right, I'm gonna fucking unleash hell on you people. Like we're done
though. I am bringing out my big gun. There's gonna be a chamber that comes up and you
fuckers are gonna lose your minds. Yes, it's gonna be Blanca. There's no way on earth. It's ever gonna be John Claude Van Dam that pops out of th. So. So. So. So. So. So, so. So, so. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, the th. So, th. So, the th. So, th. th. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, the the the the the the the the the th. So, th. So, th. So, th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thi. the. Blanca. There's no way on earth it's
ever gonna be John Claude Van Dam that pops out of this thing so y'all just
get ready. It's John Clown in it. So okay so there are like matchups
everywhere right like so the big matchup is Gile versus M. Bison but there's
also smaller matchups like you've got Zangeaf and Honda where they're gonna play Godzilla sounds while they fight. That's th. That's they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're their their their their their they. they. they. th. to to thi to to tho. to tho. they. the tho. they. they. the they. they. they're they're they're they're going to play Godzilla sounds while they fight.
That's the one that was like, we're okay with? Because they don't start
playing it until the two Japanese people run into watch it happening. Oh I didn't know
that. But then I was like, okay it's a Japanese thing and they were
okay. I'm fine. They were making a joke. That's actually a culturally like appropriate. It's a little weird. It's a th. It's a th. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's actually that's actually that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I. It's a little weird though to be fair. It's a little weird. It's a little weird. It's 99, 1994 appropriate. Sure. Then you've got like the the Ryu and Vega fight,
right? Which apparently like Vega, there was there was an issue with the rating of this film where
it was PG-13, pretty much all the way through and there was blood and there was some whatever, it was some sort of like, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th... th. th. th. th. th. It, th. It, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they-19, 19, they-19, they-19, they-19, 19, the the they-19 there was some, whatever, it was a regular PG-13 movie, but there was some sort of like,
I can't remember what it was,
some sort of incident where I think it might have been a school shooting.
It was like before America got so incredibly accustomed
to mass shootings that it became part of our,
the fiber of our living, that there was like a very sensitive environment and they the MPA made them like an R which like kids this
was a movie that you were to take children to see I guess fuck so they cut out
every bloody nose every bloody lip every bit of blood there's no blood in this
movie none except for like maybe ehan does back when he's getting whipped yeah
so like a Vega was supposed to have fallen on his claw and had this like very great death but they just like who sniffed around it because the this like like like like like like like like like like th th th this this th th this this this this th this this this th this this th this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this th this th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to have fallen on his claw and had this like very great death.
But they just like, whoop sniffed around it because there was like the only way they could get a PG-13 rating.
And eventually it got rated G and they were like, well what the how we don't want a G movie.
So I think that's why they put in some curse words like Jean Caud Van Dam saying shit. I'm calling him a dickhead. Yeah, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I the the th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, like, like, like, like, thi, thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th th th th th th th th th th th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetick-head. Yeah, I mean, the whole thing was just ill-fated from the jump.
One of my personal favorite things that happens in this movie is
Zon...
Jean-Claude Van Damme kicks the shit out of M. Bison.
Kills him, kills him, kiks him dead,
knocks him into his television screens.
Sure. And he's a lot of TVs. He does. He likes to watch a lot of things.
And he's got all the sports on at the same time. He's watching so many episodes of Friends.
It's 1994, let's be honest. He's trying to crush them all. It's good through a season in one day. And he's like, they're like their th. It's th. It's th. It's th. He th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a the. He's a the. He's a lot the. He's a lot the. He's a lot the. He's a lot the. He's a lot the. He's a lot the. He's a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot a lot th. He's a lot their th. He's a lot th. He's a lot to to th. He's a lot th. He's a lot th. He's a lot th. He's a lot th. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's a lot the. He's a lot te. He's a lot to. He's a lot to. He's a lot to. He's a lot to. He's a lot to. He's a lot to. He's a lot. He's a lot. He's like, they're all the same. There's a coffee shop again.
They just all links up to them in the coffee shop at the same time.
And then his head explodes.
That's so sad.
So as Jean-Claude Van Dam was like, I fucking did it, yay.
You see Ambison's jacket start to give him CPR?
Yes, it does. It gives him CPR.
It goes through several phases of life support which I liked a lot and it brings it back and he just pops up and start fighting again yeah and
Bison's cool it's like he got a healing spell and it just bought her back
to full health and he could do whatever he wants I mean as a D&D player
don't you kind of appreciate that I mean I very much did it was
very stupid oh the incredible it's incredibly stupid so so ryu beats vega which to the game I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the t. you don't really see, which is disappointing.
Ken beat Sagat. I don't recall that either.
I'm sure this movie a bunch of times. They're just kicking at each other for a while.
Sagat is so cool too. I feel like he should have gotten more play. Yeah.
And the guy who plays Ken is incredibly stupid and I wish he would have fallen into a ravine.
Never to be seen again.
Zangeaf and Honda just keep fighting. Yeah, there's never a conclusion to their battle.
And so they all had to escape.
And as they're running towards the doors to get out of the compound,
they start to shut, and Zangef runs up and it's just like, I got this, and holds the door open forever
because he wants to be a good guy now.
Because he didn't know they were the bad guys.
It's when DJ told him that, first of all,
he was getting paid and also that they were the bad guys,
he was very distressed.
Because they had to mess everything up. We have to fight them and he's like no We're the bad people. He's a dictator
What I I and he's like why are you here? It's like I'm getting paid. You get paid?
Do you think when you're on the side of bad that you know you are? Are more people DJs or are more people's and geefs? Do you know what I'm asking? I do, I do.
Ooh. That is a really like philosophical idea of like what is good and evil and
where does that line get drawn? And I just feel like in our street fighter episode is where we should
discuss that. I think that it might actually fall into some sort of a weird equal proportions. You think so? Yeah, I think a lot of people are self-aware enough to know that it might actually fall into some sort of weird equal proportions.
You think so?
Yeah, I think a lot of people are self-aware enough to know that like, they're not, they're
not necessarily the good guys.
And then, yeah, there's a lot of people that think they're the good guys.
Are we the good guys?
I'd like to think so. I'd like to think to to to to the to the tha to the tha the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the' the' the' the thi thi theateateate' tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thoe thi thi. thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to toe an toe andean.ean.ean. toean. toean. toean. toean. toean thean theangeep. We're all the Zangeef.
I have like just slightly less chest hair.
It's not seven inches long?
No. It's just her so long.
I like that a lot.
I mean, it's very character appropriate for the...
I mean, I fucking love these characters though.
You know what I mean?
Sure.
Even, not even these characters, the even neon maniacs when we did that movie,
just like these individual characters with these weird characteristics.
Oh, for sure.
For sure. For sure.
Like, I love this shit.
I love it.
Yeah, yeah.
Have you ever seen the movie?
.
Have you ever seen. Also, I love him. You do, I know. But this movie was kind of giving me that vibe because that movie is it's also got
a John Lithgow playing an alien.
Can I say it?
Yeah.
Let go.
I don't know why I asked permission.
And I gave.
And he's an alien? Yeah. It's a little type casting for him, but all right. It predates. And it would have been like probably ten years before this movie. And it. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. thi. thi. th. It's th. It's th Sure, but I mean later. And it would have been like probably
10 years before this movie and it's like it's as bonkers as this movie is but kind
of on purpose. Okay. And it's like it's like a just really fun ridiculous movie. Cool.
And I was kind of getting vibes of that but it was like what if you started doing
that and then you were like it was one of those wiggly worms that you try to hold onto it and just keeps going into your hands you can't go on to it. Yeah. It seems like that's what happened with this movie. Yeah. Because I feel like if you would just
suck to the original street fighter, two characters, you'd have like maybe eight. But like
the addition of like T. Hock and DJ and oh can't even Cammy, even though you need her to like cry the tie- th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. tr. true. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. the the the the the the the the the like cry at the end. It's just not great. It was just to your guess. It's just not great. So we think that Giles dead because the whole compound blows up because
the TV monitors are made up gasoline. This is the second time we think Giles dead. And how many
times did you care? Zero? Zero. Fock Sean Claude Van Dam though, am I right? I don't want to see him do anything. Yeah. I'm the TV. I'm. I'm. I'm.? Yes, he was in the movie's sudden death that takes place in Pittsburgh. Yes, that was
filmed at the Civic Arena. You got it. God, rest its soul. RIP, you big dome. Yeah. I'm sorry I'm a little bit drunk in this episode.
It's been a long day.
This movie needs it.
If it hasn't been clear before this,
I am slurring my speech.
Help.
Someone said help.
Yeah, there's a little bit of a Pittsburgh connection with Jean Claude,
but I don't give a fuck about this. Oh no, I mean, like you can come to to to to to to to to to to to to to to come to come to come to come to to to to to the to come to come to the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the thi thi thi thi. th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi. thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi to thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. th We'll take you Bruce Willis though. You boat cop.
Striking Distance Forever.
You know, I've never fucking seen that movie.
I should see you.
Maybe that'll be the first movie we do for our action movie cast.
Yeah.
Podcast.
The Polish Hill Strangler.
I take Bigelow every day.
You kind of watch out.
Yeah. So, yeah, so a few a a few, a like Zagat and I keep wanting to go Zaget,
like the dining guy.
Oh, sure, sure, how many stars?
And DJ lea lea together, Dalsim takes Charlie.
Is that what happens?
Okay.
He's like, I'm gonna go make sure he's okay.
I mean, he's a good scientist, my understanding, he can get published. Do you think he's either going to make him more human again or just look like the actual
character he's supposed to look like he's going to finish? He's going to be more human than human.
Interesting. The old Rob Zombie School of doing stuff. And then the movie ends with everybody
standing together and jumping in yelling Street Fighter, I think.
I think they say Street Fighter. Yeah.
I think that's what.
Street-Fiddy!
And the logo pops up.
I love that.
And my second to last note is, oh God.
This was our April Fool's episode.
I feel like it didn't bring you the joy that the others did. And then, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the. the that the others did. And then, well, it ends on, well, it almost ends on, Ronald Julia, Vyocundios.
You know, like, I don't know.
It was a little, I was like, let's, it's heartwarming.
It's heartwarming, but like, the man deserved better and we all know it, so like
let's not pretend like this is something he was proud of I don't know. Did you stick around to the
end of the credits? You know I didn't I've seen this movie like 30 times I
didn't. The life support system in his jacket revives M. Bison. I like that and he
punches up out of the television screens. That's cool And they ask him what he wants to do and there's like a menu to select rum and he selects world domination. That's amazing and I love
that. I mean I wish I'd seen it but I'm not going to go back and look at it. And
then fair listener is Street Fighter. Alan, Alan didn't like it. I'm having a
wonderful time. It's not as good as over the top let's be honest. Well a few things. There th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. There are th. There is th. There is th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A thi. A th. A th. A th. A th. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm th. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm not. I'm not. I'm. I'm not. It's not as good as over the top, let's be honest. Well, few things are. There is no Meet Me Up. There is a really weird soundtrack to this movie. I don't think I even
noticed it. Oh yeah, the Street Fighter soundtrack has... Hold on, let me pull that fucker up so I can read you off
there's a list of amazing artists on it. You've got Ice Cube. I do love Ice Cube. I do I. Nause? I do love Nause. The far side?
I don't remember any of this, Alan. When is it happening? I don't know. But Paris is also on there?
Who I also like? L.O. Cool Jay, Craig Mack? No. MC Hammer and D. C. thereau C. the Faun Sanders. their. Farrar. Fa. the football fame. No. Oh, M. the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. N. N. I. N. N. I. N. N. th. N. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. N. N. I. N. I. N. I. the. I? Yes. Deion Sanders. Deon Sanders of football. You may not know who
Deon Sanders is. If you're an Allen. He is a footballman and he's still talking
about football in public which is like maybe just go home.
Oh this right he's on the TV talking about football. Yeah, just Dion. He was playing
as of like five years ago. Dion, go home. He was a Raven.
Stop.
Chuck Dee does a song called Rumbo and Dijongo.
I have no memory of any of this.
These are all artists that I enjoy.
I know is like, when?
When was this?
None of them?
I don't think so.
I think it's like one of those soundtracks. We listen th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. th. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. ta. tod. tod. tod. toda. tog. tog. tog. tog. tog. tog. tog. tog. tog. tog. toge. th. th. th. th. th. think so. I think it's like one of those soundtracks that's like, yeah, we put together a soundtrack. We listen to it, they're not in the movie.
It's not inspired by.
So Katie.
Can we move to the ratings face?
I'm sorry, what?
You want to go in that ratings face?
You would go to the ratings face. I'm gonna need a scoche of justification about that one. Just a friscent of justification.
This movie is terrible.
I still want you to give it a ten though.
Here's the thing.
Yeah.
It's really...
You're ten years old when this movie comes out.
I didn't see it until much later.
But I could smell the arcade, you know what I mean?
I know that sounds fucked. I the the arcade, you know what I mean? I know that sounds fucked up, but like, not at all. I can smell the arcade and I can feel the
buttons under my fingers. Sure. And it means something to me and it's terrible
and it's a terrible representation of the game, but I like it. And I'm married
to someone who fucking loves Street Fighter, which is like exhausting for me. Watch it on the TV. And he just th, and he just left here because he's in next week's episode and we recorded it first and
he was like, you can tell them about how we watch Street Fighter and I was like, no.
And here I am doing it because I drank a whole bunch more.
Like he watches Street Fighter on the internet, like watches other people play.
Like watches other people.
Did you know that's a thing? Twitch? Yeah. You know that those people who do Twitch that are on the high end of it make millions of dollars.
Millions of dollars. So I've been thinking about twitching my ladies' D&D games.
I don't know twitching is a verb.
Yeah. But I feel like people would watch us make funny.
For sure. How do we get money?
How do we get money? Uh-huh. You get sponsorships? You. Them Doritos are real delicious. I will eat Doritos for money. I will eat Doritos for free. Give me money.
Fuck you pay me is what I'm saying.
Fuck you pay me.
This movie's a 10.
Go on.
Um, I'm glad that I've seen this,
because I know it is an important touchstone in your life.
You don't give a shit.
That's not true, I care for you deeply. I mean it's bad. Oh yeah, it's real bad.
So bad.
But it's a movie that like...
It's so bad it hurts, actually.
There's a lot of movies that I would have seen when I was like real young that are equally
shitty to this movie that I would also like swear by and just be like, you're gonna
get down on this movie. It's fine. I mean, I would get this movie like two. Like I think it's really bad. I cannot like it's the good God just tell people to watch it except for like
like, holy shit, it's like drugs. You don't think it's like fun to watch. It would probably be fun to watch with people. I think if you have any knowledge of the street fighter universe, it might th. I th. I that a character? Right, exactly, exactly.
And I spent a lot of time going, why is Balrog named after a Tolkien monster?
What's going on here?
Yeah.
It's even weirder when you consider flipping the two that Ballrog is actually M. Bison
and the original iteration of the game?
I don't know.
I love that M Bison is your way to get around Mike Tyson. I that. I that. I they they they they they they they they they they they they they were they were they were they were they were they were they were like, I they were like, I they were like, I they were like, I they were like, they were like, they were like, they were they were like, I they're they were like, I they're they're th, I th. I th. I they're th. I they're th. I th. I th. I th, I th, I th, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I theeeeei thei that that that that that that that that theeeeee. I spent theei the. I spent the. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I love that M Bison is your way to get around Mike Tyson. I know, right? They were like, how can we just
Bison? M. Bison. Mike Tyson was all there was back then. He was the only boxer there was. He was
boxing no one. Also punch out was the biggest thing. Oh yeah. You know I was never good at that game. It's so hard. It really is. Yeah. Yeah.
Once you get past like Don Flamenco, it gets real hard. The characters are so good though.
It is. Also, I have time for Mike Tyson. But why? Well, I mean, he's a convicted rapist. But he wasn't at the time of punch out. Oh, I know. Yeah, I mean, you didn't care for him. And video games are not really my stee?. the the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. Yeah. I. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. Yeah. I th. Yeah. Yeah. I the. I 't care for Punch Out. I mean, you don't care for him now. And video games are not really my stise.
No, I know.
Katie.
Alan.
Can I go to a little place called Mailbag?
Please.
Mailbag.
I'm here.
From the Kill by Kill.
the podcast.
Great to hear check them out. They asked us a question, because I will ask people to ask us questions now, because I
think it's fun.
Because we're egotistical and tell us more.
Eh, okay, I'll go with it.
I haven't done all these episodes so I can't talk about myself.
What was the first horror movie you both bonded over, good or bad. Question, I don't know.
Do you know the answer to this?
I think I do.
Okay, tell me.
I think it's mausoleum.
I think it is too.
Because so like we, we, we, Alan and I met, I don't know, years ago.
Yeah.
13 years, when you came back, here. Yeah it was within like two years after that yeah yeah about 10 years ago. Ten years? Yeah yeah I'm sorry I
called a 13. We would have met at what the I think we met at the second. The first
time I ever laid eyes on you you were booing me so let's be honest.
Let's be honest. No, a man booed me. It was a joking boo. I often forget that I look like a shaved ape and people don't. Let to to to the th. I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I the th. I th. I th. I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was a th. I was a th. I'm th. I'm so so th. I'm th. I was a th. I'm so th. I'm so th. I'm th. I'm. I'm so th. I'm so th. I'm so. I'm so. I'm so I'm so I'm. I'm. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I was I was I was I was I was I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so the. I'm so too. I'm so too. I'm so too. I'm so te. I'm sorry. I'm so th. I'm sorry. I'm sorry joking boo that I I often forget that I look like a
shaved ape and people don't think my joking booze as joking boo twoos. I was a 22
year old girl. Yeah no that's fine boo my band. Yeah it was a monster old
man booing your band. You were 32. I know how old I am I know how god damn
I am K. Anyway so we I think the first time we hung out was the Marks game, right?
Well, the Gary Gygax Memorial Games.
But I was so scared there I didn't talk to anybody.
Yeah, but that's so scared.
I was so scared.
That's the first memory I have of you.
Okay.
Because I was being so scared and&D game together. We're Team Evil.
And that's how I learned how to play Dungeons and Dragons, which was so fun.
It has changed my life so much for the better.
I don't know how mausoleum became our thing.
You were doing that blog at the time.
Yeah.
You know, I lost all of the images I drew for that.
Wow. My computer crash and I lost them and I like I've tried I like did all these sort of like hard drive recovery things that try to find them
They're all gone. This is what the best hours
I spent like days of my life on this shit
What but what I really love about it is that? So Katie was like? their horror movies I do and I was like dude. You should do this movie? It's fucking? It's fucking? It's? I'm th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I's? I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's t. I's t. I's t. I's t. I's t. I's t. I's t. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm t. I'm. I'm t. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I's. I's. I's. I's. I'm. titties in it. Demon titties. And then she did a review of it and it was
bonkers and amazing and I loved it so much and I was like you know she's
fucking hilarious. It's all I'm good for really. And then when I was like I want
to do a podcast. Who do I want to do a podcast? Oh that woman who's
fucking hilarious to be on this podcast. We didn't really know we were like great friends when we started this were we we were like friends but I'm friends because you your your husband and I were in a band together at the time
oh yeah but I didn't I like ignore the things he but but but we were in
social circles because sure sure sure sure but we were not the friends we are
no no we're years later yeah we were stuck up one another's
buts best friends so yeah I would say mausoleum was the was the big like th like like like like like like like like like th th like th th like th like th like th like th like th like th like th like th like th th like th th like th th th th th th like th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. thi. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. the the the th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I the. the. I the. I the. I the. the. I the. the big, like, thing that brought us together.
And if you would like to listen to our mausoleum episode, to hear our thoughts on it, we did it very recently,
it was episode 196, mausoleum, and the intro that I wrote for, it says, my god, do we love this piece of shit movie?
So I think, yes. Mosalium, 1986 1986 1986 1986 1986 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 thia thiiiii. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, was th, was thiolium, was thioliolium, was thioliolium, was thi. Wasa, was thiolium was that was that was was that was that was was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was was that was was was that was was that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th, was, was, was, was, was th, was th, was a thi. And thi. And thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th I think yes, Mosoleum 1986 for a
long time you couldn't find it anywhere. No, yeah, yeah, yeah. And now it's
available in Blu-ray. Why? I love the things that might get stuck from
this civilization for people to find the future and be like, this was high art for them.
This is a meaningful, meaningful experience in their cultural fabric. When do you think the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi for a thi for a th th th thi for a th th th thi for a th thi for a thi for thi for thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to theeooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo thi thi to to and be like this was high art for them. This is this is a meaningful meaningful experience in their cultural fabric. What do you think
the metaphor of the demon tidies was? Well you see Alan women women's work is
often relegated to I don't know I've got nothing. Speaking of your husband. Oh my god
what are we doing next week, Katie?
We're going to invite him back.
So, okay, so he was in episode 10 Blair Witch Project,
which I edited all references to our relationship out of because I thought it would make us more popular.
I don't, it was a weird thing.
It was hard back then. We were trying, we were trying to make it big. Yeah, yeah. We've, we've made, we've made, we've made, we've made, we've made, we've made, we've made, we've made, we've made, we've made, we've made wea. We've made th. We've made th. We've made th. We've made th. We've made th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. to to thi. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. te. to. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. We were trying to make it big. Yeah, yeah. We've made peace. Where we are. Anyway. He wants to do do those the Civil War, right? He is the
king of the Civil War. Oh no, Rob is not number 10. He is number 15. 15? Who was 10?
Mike Pullum? Oh my god. I've done all this wrong. Yeah.
Episode 15 Blair Witch Project.
Rob emailed me a few days ago.
That sounds weird like we don't live together, we do.
He emailed me and said,
Can you guys cover this movie on your podcast?
It's the second worst civil war movie of all time.
And I said, yes, but you have to be on it.
It is called curse of the Confederate cannibals. Not
cannibal confederates? That is the alternate diet before. I didn't know where
it was coming out. Yeah. Curse of the Confederate cannibals. Yeah. Curse of the
confederate cannibals. Curse of the cannibal confederates. It doesn't matter.
It's free on Amazon. You'll find it. Yes, you will and you'll... Oh my god, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry in advance.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
He's sorry, too.
We're all sorry.
No one needs to be sorry.
It's real bad.
It's real bad.
It's real bad.
Okay, but watch it anyway.
Yeah, for sure. I guess. So come back next week. We're going to do another guest with Rob. And...
Get us on the internet. Yeah. We get t-shirts. We got t-shirts. I mean, or whatever. Find us on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter. Leave us an iTunes review. Oh, those are pretty helpful. We've read any those in a while. We should do that. No, we haven't got any new ones in a while. Give us some my turn to guys. Oh, fuck you guys. And th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th, th. th. th. th. We'll th. We'll th-a. We'll the the the the the the the t-a. We'll the t- I' t- I' t- t- t- t- t-I t-a. We'll t-a, we'll the t-a, we'll the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the t. We, we the t. We'll t-a. We'll t-a. We'll t-s. We'll t-s. We'll t-s, we'll t-s. We'll-s. We'll-s. We'll-s. We'll-s. We'll-s, we'll-s. We'll t-s, we'll t- us my turn to you guys. And thank you
for listening to another episode of Wearwolf Ambulance. Bye. you know the true