Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 342- Fear Street Part One: 1994 (2021)
Episode Date: July 26, 2021In this week's episode, we decided to see what all the fuss was about with the new Netflix release "Fear Street Part One: 1994." Special topics for your consideration include: a lot of strong opinions... about 90s rock, a lot of strong opinions about 90s fashion and the revisionist history therein, teen television: is it for us? (probably?), early internet usage, and kids? Listen to Soundgarden. We're gonna do this like the "Hell House LLC" trilogy, covering the next movie in two weeks. If you'd like to hear us talk about that absolutely delightful franchise, they are Episodes 254, 256, and 258. Find us online: Support us at patreon.com/werewolfambulance and get bonus episodes about action movies-- we just recorded our "Mission Impossible" episode and holy ghost, what a movie. Buy merch for yourself or those you love at www.teepublic.com/user/werewolfambulance on Reddit at r/werewolfambulance on Facebook at facebook.com/werewolfambulance on Twitter @werebulance on Instagram @werewolfambulance. werewolfambulance@gmail.com If you liked this, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen! It helps others find us and allows us to continue to grow. Intro song is by Alex Van Luvie Outro song is A. Wallis- "EMT" Seriously, we have the best listeners, hands down. Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast.Â
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Alan, Katie, I have a problem.
What's that?
I've got a machine head.
It's better than the rest.
Alan.
Katie.
I have a problem.
What's that?
I've got a, I've got a machine head.
It's better than the rest.
I was thinking about this while that song was
playing. That guy had like six songs in him right and he's like I'm out.
Yep, yep. Got a machine head. It's better than the rest green to red. I walk from my machine.
the machine head. It's better than the rest green to red. I walk from my machine. Oh fuck that's that's deep that's right up there with there's no no no no there's no there's no there's no there's no there's no there's no the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. the the. the. the. th. the. the' the' th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. that's that's the. the. that's the. to the. the. the. the. the. the. That's right up there where there's no sex near violence.
I mean, Bush lyrics are one of my favorite things.
There are no jewel lyrics.
Tied to a wheel, my fingers got a feel.
Bleeding through a turnicet smile.
I spin on a whim, I slide to the right.
I felt you like electric light.
For our love, for our fear, for our rise against the years and years
and years.
Do you think his poetry, because it's poetry, it's not lyrics.
Is what drove Gwenstafond the arms of that country in Western man?
I would have to assume.
I can't do it anymore.
Pickle, tickle, oh pickle.
And she's like, this man's talking about cut-off gene shorts,
I'm there. That shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-S.
Oh, that will get stuck in my head. Yeah, you're welcome.
Anyway, 1994, great year. Top-notch year.
I always find it funny when movies that are set in a specific year only play music from
that specific year. It's like, you know we're losing to stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff several songs in this film came out after 1994. Is it so? Garbage, that record came out in 1995.
Oh, shit. And Fire Starter, because Prodigies, it was like 1996. I'm sure of that. I didn't even look it up, but I'm sure of it. that. I'm sure of it. I'm sure of it. Without looking. Qu you. Qu you. Qu you. Qu you. Qu. Qu. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. th. that. that. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It. It. It's. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. I. It's. It's. I. th. I. It's. I. th. I. th. It's. I. It's. It's. It's. It's. Quick aside about Fire Starter? Yeah. You don't like that song?
You're doing something wrong. That sounds a goddamn joy. Yeah.
There's a fireman. You know what else I really like? What? Maya hawk? I really like Maya hawk.
She is Heather at the beginning of the movie who gets murdered. I wish she'd been in the movie longer.
Yeah, she was entertaining to watch. She's in the Stranger Things.. Go. Go. Go. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Go. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Go. th. Go. thi. Go. th. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go, thi. Go, th. Go, th, th, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go th, go th, go th, go. Go, go. Go, go. Go, go. Go, go. Go, go. Go. Go. Go. Go, go. Go. Go, th. Go, th. Go, th. Go, th. Go, th. Go, th. Go, th. Go, th. Go, the the. Go. the the the. the. the. the the the. the. thi. the the. the. the the the. the the. the thi. the the the the thi. the. the. the of the movie who gets murdered. I wish she'd been in the movie longer. Yes. Yeah, she was entertaining to watch.
She's in The Stranger Things. Who is she? Season 3. Oh, I haven't seen that thrown. Oh, I wish.
Season 3. Oh, I wish. they're season 3. Oh, I thrown. Oh, I thrown. Oh, I thi. thrown. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thee. theee. the. the. the. the the. the. the. the. the. Yeah, of course they are. Those kids are probably 30. They're like 75 now.
They somehow are older than I am.
Yeah, I don't know how that happened.
A little wormhole there.
So there's this lady being a real bitch to your girl Heather.
She's a teenage cashier.
Yes.
Geez.
And then immediately closer starts playing. And I was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I, oh, I, I'm, I'm, I'm th. thi, I'm thi, thi, thi, th. thi, th. thi, th. thi, thi, thi, they're they're thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're thi.. they're this is going to be this is like just in my fucking wheelhouse right like this is made for
people who were born between 1980 and 1985 this is who it's for yeah yeah yeah.
Yeah I feel like I'm a little too old but I still you like some nine
inch nails oh for sure oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
soundtrack to my first big breakup when I was 16 years old yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Soundtrack to my first big breakup when I was 16 years old.
Yeah.
Was a pretty hate machine.
Pretty hate machine, yeah.
Not a now, but it holds up, but, uh,
no, I'm not a big fan of it.
I'm like his later stuff better.
You like some downward spiral?
Yeah, or think the center of our
Venn diagram would have been nine-inch nails. I like that. I think we just found our
like our little friendship. Nine and 19 maybe we would have less. For sure, for sure, and six and 60 would just be very odd. Oh gosh, no. You like Ramona? Do you like the cure? What? And Slayer? Wow, that's so on brand for you.
I watched this movie with Rob and he was just like exclaiming with joy over the 90s stores in the mall.
Like, so fucking excited. They did nail that.
I didn't feel like they nailed 90s fashion,
but maybe I'm wrong.
I feel like it was a little too well-fitting clothing for that.
It's the 90s fashion of now.
Sure. It's like what kids are wearing now.
For sure.
For sure.
.. For the took, the to............................................ It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I. I which I appreciate that it's rated R, but it's
on Netflix, so what does a rating even matter?
So here's the thing, Netflix makes a lot of teen programming that I have enjoyed on sick
days of my life.
Sure.
And then I wonder, is it teen drama for teens?
Do teens like it too, or is it for people like me who are like I'd like to watch a teen drama? I think it's the latter. Okay. Because it's not, I feel like MTV's teen wolf is for actual
teams. I don't even know what that is so that sounds right. It's just beautiful
people being werewolves. That's not sassy. It's like a vampire diaries but with
whairewolves. Wearwolves are dogs.
You obviously have not watched True Blood.
No I haven't.
Or like teen pregnancy moms?
Are those werewolves?
No, I just mean MTV programming.
That's what kids are watching, right?
Yeah, I mean, is that show still on?
thiiii.
Is road still on?
That cannot be still on? Is road rules still on? That cannot be still on.
But I bet the people who were on real world and road rules when we were younger are like
Still competing in challenges somewhere somewhere somewhere some where 42 sit down Rachel or whatever your name is
Didn't one of them became a wrestler? Oh fuck was the M's or something? Oh the Miz the M's? Yes, the M is. Yes, the miz was on road rules. The the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the road is is is the road. It is the road. It was was was on road. It was on road. It was on road. It was on road. the road. the road. the road. the road. the the road. the road. the the the the the road. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. wrestler. Oh, fuck, what is this? The MIG or something?
Oh, the MIS, the MIS.
Yes, the MIS was on road rules, that's right, yeah.
Yes, he did.
Oh, that was an unpredictable wormhole.
We just went down.
I saw Suzy from the Miz was on, but Susie from RoadRules, I saw her on Pitts campus once because we went there at the same time.
She used to work at the Blockbuster by my house.
Hello, Susie.
Hi Susie.
But yeah, I think this movie is for, it's for nostalgia for people like yourself. And then it's also for kids to watch a rated-dart movie that they can somewhat identify with, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I their, and I their, and I their, and I their, and then, and then, their, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, Because I feel like kids still listen to this music. I feel like 90 sales is still relevant. Okay, so that I
actually have some evidence on which is that on the way home from my friend Casey's Perry's wedding I was on a bus from uptown. their to'n't to'n'n'o'e' the to'n'e' today thin' thee. tho'-l to to th-l th-l th-l th-l th th-l th-l th-l th-l th-l th-l thin th-l thin thin thin thin thin thin thin th-I th-I was th-I was thin thin thin thin' thin' tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho that that that thin thin thin thin th th th th th th th th th th th th th thin thin thin thin thin thin the the the the the the the the the the the they the the the the the the the the the tho downtown and they were like oh we went to see the XX or something like that some band that I'd not
heard of sure and I was like real real drunk of course and I was like that
sounds stupid you should listen to sound garden and I was like thus to the.
And all these kids were like to who? And I was like to their own. to sound garden and I was like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like the the to to to the to to to the to to to the to to to the the the to to the the to the to to to to the to the to to to to the the the their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. their. I was like sound. I was like sound. I was like sound. Sound. Sound. Sound. S. S. to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. th. th. th. to. to. to. th. to. to. to. to. to. that. th. th SoundGarden is? And I like stood up and I was like, does anyone on this bus know who SoundGarden is?
And my cousin Vicky raised her hand and I was like,
no, not you.
And like one kid in the back was like,
I know I know I gottcha you made me.
I was like, listen to fill on black days.
It'll change your life. I can imagine th the the home finding that on Spotify and being like that bitch was wrong
This sucks
It doesn't suck
It's just if you weren't there for it. Sure sure sure I'm more of a
Ultra mega okay sound garden guy where all he did was screech. Yeah, there was no scene. Yeah, oh god rest his soul. Oh no, oh man. I Ah, man. That one hit heart. That one did.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Anyway, Heather gets attacked by a skullman.
She gets killed by a skullman who turns out to be her friend Ryan.
She is like saved briefly from the knife by a book, which I thought was cool.
It's like she uses as a little shield. Because she works at B. Daltin. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He. He. He. He. He. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He apparently. He works. He works. He apparently. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He works. He apparently works. No mall bookstore is having one person close that
bookstore. Especially a teen, teen girl. Yeah, because you've got to you've got to
reshelve all the books before you leave. You got to straighten on the shelves.
Oh yeah, you're a boarders employee. Yeah. You were a boarders alum. So I found that very like, guys. And then I said, Dumb-Dum, don't don't care about this.
Also, did Spencer's gift ever sell blow-up dolls?
I don't know.
I hope so.
I have a series of notes like,
Backstap, front stab.
Yeah, with the lava lamb.
And then she runs out of the store and they were just dead people everywhere. Ryan killed them. But she had just tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha thuuuu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thoed thoom thoom thoom thoomtomtod thu. thoom tho tho tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. Did thoen thoen thoen thoen th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. Did, thi. Did, thi. Did, the. Did, theea. Did, thea. Did theea. Did, tea. Did toon't toon't toon't toon't theea. Did thea. Did thea out of the store and they were just dead people everywhere and I thought, how'd they get there? Ryan killed them.
But she had just gone in there.
Uh-huh.
Okay, it doesn't matter.
You're dead.
He's fast.
He's so quick.
That bookstore girl, RIP, too good for this world.
It's true.
It's true. stranger thing, she plays a character that works in a mall. So I think she was like, I'm gonna kill off mall me,
so I'll get other roles that aren't me being in a mall.
Smart, you don't want to pigeon that hole.
Yeah, yeah.
Did you say you don't want to pigeon that hole?
I appreciate that.
I think I did.
And then that garbage song plays that We also learned that this is happening in a town called Shadyside and the town sort of across the lake the rich kid camp is
Sunnyvale. Which is funny because in our town, our city, Shadyside is like one
of the wealthiest neighborhoods in the city and they kept being like Shadyside so crummy
and calling it Shadyside and I was like actually I can't afford to live there and never will. Having never read an RL Stein, having the rich part of town
called Sunnyvale and the port of town called Shadyside
feels very RL Stein to me.
Yeah, I think you're probably right on that.
Yeah.
I do love that, I can't remember the kid's name.
It's a little brother that's always on the computer. Josh. Josh. The real star. the real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the real. the the the the the the the the real. the th. I. the th. the the the the the the the the the, I the, I the, I the, I, I, I, I, I, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. today. today. today. today. today, today, today, today, today. today. t. the t.? Yes. Yeah, he's a fucking delight that child actor. When we meet him and he's listening
to Iron Maiden's Fear of the Dark, I was very excited. He is wearing an Iron Maiden shirt for
most of the movie. Yes. His sister is wearing a PJ Harvey shirt and I was like, how are you kids so cool?
Yeah, that's the thing that drives me nuts about these like retro like the kids in
Stranger things when the guy's like, oh, what do you like the clash?
DePesh mode like you live in fucking Iowa in 1984. You don't even know John Cougar melon game. Yeah, exactly So Josh breaks down his, uh, he's talking online on an AIM chat,
if I'm not mistaken.
Bring, brink, brink, brink.
That is a sound, I never even did that very much,
but it's a sound that's like ingrained into my memory.
Yeah, it to me sounds like living in college
and people having their doors open,
and the sounds on their computer on,
because they'd be listening to music. Oh sure. And then it would just be interrupted by like, pring, brim, and then like a
k-ksh as a door closes.
Because they're now about to sex on a name chat.
Yeah.
No.
But he's talking to,
I thought this would pay off that he's talking to like queen of something or other, I thought it was going to turn out to be like one of the cool kids was actually her.
I wonder if that'll pay off in a later film.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Do you know how expensive AOL is?
Is something that, what was it?
What was it just all those free discs?
What does it?
Uh, D.
Is it, I'm stealing it.
I'm like, how?
He also has a murder board, which appears to be like in their dining room?
I guess their dad really doesn't care.
We never see their parents, right?
No.
I mean, she talks about not ending up like her dad darker side of Charlie Brown. Yeah. Oof, yeah.
So we learned that-
What was child neglect okay in like an American tradition in the 50s and 60s when it became
so illegal now?
Because we were trying to force everyone into the American workforce?
So you just made it seem okay that Charlie Brown and friends never had parents.
Hmm. Fair. Wom-wom. So we learned that there's a witch who has come back for revenge.
That's, that is a Josh's theory. Yes. Yes. Cut to Portis Head playing got very excited when Portis Head was on the soundtrack. Which song was that? Uh, nobody loves you like I do? Yes. Okay, yes. I'm a big Portis Head fan. Are you? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah, yeah? Yeah, yeah? Yeah, yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that, yeah, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that. Yeah. Yeah, that, that, that, that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that. Yeah, that. Yeah, that. Yeah, that. Yeah, that. Yeah, that, that, that. Yeah, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's, that. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's. that was that? Nobody loves you like I do. Yes, okay yes. Yeah I'm a big Portishead fan. Are you? Yeah? Yeah,
yeah that sounds right. Yeah. Mm-hmm. I was depressing music. Slightly based in hip. Yeah,
big, big, big, big, the next song I have noted here is, damn, I wish I was your lover.
Because that's the song that plays when Josh sees Kate walking down the Hollywood side. That was so cute and so funny. And we're introduced to Kate and Simon. Kate is a cheerleader. And Simon is the
worst character in the world. This was giving me freaky vibes. Which is the movie where the serial killer
and the woman's which were like the like the best friends that she has,
like they were giving me like that,
those kind of like snarky, snark vibes.
But Simon is just a terrible character.
Sure, yeah, there's nothing redeeming.
I kept thinking like how long must we tolerate him?
Until they give him his Save the looks just like the killer to me. Sure. Just like Ryan?
It's he's back. No, it's not. It's someone else. Just another non-descript white kid.
So we find out that Dina has quit band because of Sam.
Who she's clearly had a breakup with. Yeah. But then she gets back in band? Because you can just get back in band I guess. She seemed to be like if it was like a real like a, uh, uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. the the th. the th. the the the the the they's back. the the the they's back. the they's back. the the the th. th. th. th. Yeah. But then she gets back in band, because you can just get back in band, I guess.
She seemed to be like, if it was like a real like,
Michael Corleone thing, just when I was getting out,
they pulled me back in.
Back in.
So she gets back in band.
And they're having like a band vigil.
Band in football vigil? Yeah. Or something? The murders at the mall.
Right.
Mall murders.
In Sunnyvale.
Why is it not just being held in Shadyside?
It's Sunny.
So you could have the tension of fights?
I guess so.
On the bus there, they listen to Cypress Hill.
Very excited about that.
And Dina puts on her headphones and she's listening to radio radio radio radio to radio you know what, Cypress Hill is better than Radiohead, come at me, bro.
Definitely more fun.
Yeah.
But I feel like it's very on-brand for Dina to not want to have fun and want to listen
to Radiohead.
Fine, but fucking love Cyprus Hell.
She didn't have a PJ Harvey shirt. Yeah, that's legit. She's not a huge fan of fun.
Man, there's like that scene, because she sees Sam, who turns out to be a girl,
yeah, yeah.
Uh, making out with a football dude who's grabbing her butt.
And she like goes and sits, like, slumped against a building by herself, and I was like, oh, that teenage rejection, like, I felt it right there, you know. It still stings me.
When you're like, oh, the world's actually ending right now.
What is it in your brain that makes you think that?
Just fucking hormones.
Your brain does not functioning properly.
It's really fucked up that we let these people have any responsibility.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, here, choose a college choose a career path like you literally were gonna kill yourself over like you know
This fucking ding-dong
I hate it. Oh my god, oh just feeling things so intensely all the time
Oh man, so glad I'm so numb. Yeah, I'm sure I've told this anecdote a million times when I was was in high school, my mom said, really enjoy these. These are the best years of your life. And I was like, no.
No. Down. From me. It's not, I'm telling you, like late 40s is pretty to' guys. I feel like I'm enjoying my late 30s. Yeah. Though I'm a lot more tired than I would like to be that. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. that doesn't like th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. the thi. the the thi the thi the the thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the best the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the best the the best the the the the best the the best the the best the best the best the best thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi ti ti ti ti ti ti. ti. thi thi. thi. thi thi thi th that improves. I do have the note high school is triflin.
Oh, it's triflin.
It is triflin.
Peter's, Peter is the guy that Sam has gotten with,
and his 1994 hair is excellent.
It's just like a center part curled down around his eyebrows.
Very Seth Green. It's got a lot of that going on.
I like it a lot.
How does one get sucker, sucker punched by a man
who is obviously going to punch you?
Like that one football player is just winding back
like Popeye forehards spinning and the other guy's like,
where did that come from?
That's all Dean's fight, I guess. And then cut to they're all, there, the, the, their their their their their their their their their their their their fight I guess. And then cut to their all
there's a big bra and then we cut to the bus. Simon is fighting as the he is the
witch mascot they are the witches and the devils to these two teams. He's just fighting with the
green face paint on. It's very funny. When they cut to the bus and Kate just on the the bus scream about killing preppy the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theirfee theirfee thep. thefease. teap. thease. tea. tea. tea. tea. thease. thease. thease. thease. thease. thease. thease. thease. the. the. the. the is is is is is. the is. the is. the is. the is. the is. the is. the is. the is. the is. the is. the is. the is the is the is. the is. te is. te.ea. tea. tea.ea. tea. tea.ea. tea.ea.ea.ea. te.e cut to the bus and Kate just on the bus scream about killing preppy
assholes?
Yes, they love it.
Where is the teacher?
They love it.
I mean, they open the emergency door and everything starts beeping and the bus is just
speeding along.
Yeah.
If you're the bus driver, you fucking they just gave a speech about literal murder.
It's like her William Wallace moment.
A film I've never seen and we'll never see.
Was it brave boy some of the movies cool? Lionheart.
Preface. They throw a water cooler that I only associate with dumping on your coach after
you win the big game, out the back door.
Why did they bring that?
Was there supposed to be a game?
I thought it was a game.
That's why all the sportsmen's were there.
They said they had to be there.
Because they were like, oh, the only people from Sunnyvale are the ones who had to, the band. Oh. So why did you need so much hydration? Because you clearly didn't, he didn't drink it.
They thought they were going to win the vigil.
I guess.
Yeah.
Great vigil, coach.
I'm still thinking it on the sheriff or whoever's giving the speech.
Oh, just the town preacher.
Yeah. Hallelujah, dump. Hallelujah. In the light of the Lord.
So this causes the sunny veilers who are taunting them with their scully masks on to
wreck their Mercedes or whatever.
Yeah, they're driving behind them and they throw the cooler out.
The Victory Water.
The Victory Water.
Then we see the Sheriff questioning each of them and Simon just goes,
suck at pig. And I was like, no way teens ever do that and get away with it.
That cop would have beat the shit out of that kid. And he would, you felled on the
steps. You felled on the steps. And also like I do not condone police
brutality but that kid sucks.
So Sam has been hospital.
Oh no, Sam crawls out of the car.
Her nose is bleeding.
She like touches some leaves and then has a vision.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's cool.
But Dina's nose is also bleeding.
I did not know why that was.
I did not know.
Is it like sympathetic?
Have their nose bleeds?
What's going on?
That's what happens to girls?
. Have their nosebleeds synced up? What's going on? Oh, that's what happens to girls, yeah. Once they make love.
I think later in the film, doesn't Kate's nosebleed too?
Yeah.
Why?
I don't know.
Does it just mean the witch is near?
I guess so?
Are thi Stine's getting a little lusy, Finding out. That's a good question, or was he like Anna Martin of Babysitters Club?
Or like all the books after V.C. Andrews died.
Yeah.
Robert Lawrence Stein, born October 8, 1943.
Still with us, still with us.
Yeah.
Um, I can only imagine he did not write this movie.
I'm looking, just chill.
No, he did not write the story. Okay. Arl Stein is credited as a writer but based on the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. B. B. th. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the story. Okay.
Arl Stein is credited as a writer but based upon the Fear Street books by is his parenthetical.
Got you.
Based upon the fear street books by that is a grammatically terrible fragment.
Anyway.
So yes, Sam has heard the voice of the woods, seen the witch's face.
And so we're to assume that she's been touched by
the witch.
Yes, the witch says, it's you.
Why is it her?
I'm not sure.
I guess we'll find out in the later movies.
I hope so.
Like Dina calls the hospital and Sam's mom as a bitch to teenage girl.
This movie's a lot of moms being bitches to teenage girls.
Which makes sense in 1994, not a lot of like compassionate parents towards like queer relationships, maybe in high school.
That's true. Yeah, how did you feel about the kid playing Castlevania listening to Rob Zombie?
That was pretty top. Yeah, more human than human. I did. He's an adorable delight. I kind of want to play Castlevania? I now now. I th in th in th in thing thing thing thing thing thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. their thi. their their their thi. thi. thi. thi thi. thi. thi. thi. In thi. In to make to make toeeean toean toean toean toean toean toeateateateateate toeateatea toeate to to ththem. Yeah, more human than human. I did. He's an adorable delight. I kind of want to play Gesselvadian now. I've never played it. I feel like it's something I could get into.
Oh yeah, it's real fun. Do you like cute little ranch houses with well manicured yards.
So we also learned that Kate and Simon are dealing pills to get out of the town, I guess.
Okay, all right. Escape pills. And that, uh, I love that the nerd brother Josh is, uh, he's like a
proto hacker and he hacks the vending machine. That is very cool. To impress the girl. It works too. That would, that would, that would, that would, that would, that that would, that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. they. they. they they're the. the. they. they. they're they're they're they're the the the the the the the the. That is very cool. To impress the girl. It works too. That would, that would,
I mean, yeah. I mean, this was prime, like, uh, I feel like hacking has never had a heyday.
Like it had back in 1994. Oh, yeah, it had just come off the heels of Jurassic Park where she had
hacked the mainframe. I'm a hacker, it's what I do. Shut up. And like, uh, I knew a bunch of people who had dialer phones, which you could just plug,
you like, it hacked pay phones.
It made the sounds of coins being dropped in.
Is that what it, it like triggered it?
The sound of the coins.
If I remember correctly.
Oh, wow.
I could be misremembering it. in touch. We always just use 1-800 collect and would be like, what's your name?
You'd be like, yeah, I'm here, can you meet me? Can you meet me now?
Can you meet me now? They do also have a pager though, which I like.
Sure, sure, because she's the drug dealer. Yeah, a friend of mine had a pager and I would page 5-31, 5, 3,000 and that would mean to call me, because it's boobies bube bube-? Did you get the joke? I did. I did.
If you put an extra boob on it, it's boobless. Boobless. Here's another song that was on the
soundtrack that was not out until 1987 is one of my all-time favorite songs. You're a woman by Whitetown. What? Yeah, I don't know it to hear it. I fucking love that song. You're a woman? Your woman? Your woman. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I don't know that. You know it to hear it.
I fucking love that song.
You're a woman?
Your woman.
Your woman.
Yeah.
By White Town.
White Town.
Yeah.
When you hear it, you'll know it.
You could definitely be making this up right now.
I'm not.
It came out in like 97, I, the cops are being shitty at the hospital?
Yeah, the cop, the sheriff is absolutely useless.
He keeps telling Dina, like, come to me, you can tell me things, and then when they tell him things,
he's like, go fuck yourself. Even though as we find out at the end, he knew something was up.
Right, right, right, right. Ding Dong. Uh, oh, wait.
Something happens.
They do the vending machine.
I have the note, Sam and Dina are fighting.
They're having like a fight.
Yeah. And then Peter gets stabbed?
No.
Who's Peter?
Peter is the boyfriend, football boyfriend from because they're fighting in the little, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the the the their, their, their, thi. thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th. th. th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th football boyfriend, on eBay. That's right. Because they're fighting in the little like emergency room cubicle and then all of a sudden
he gets stabbed from behind and it's awesome.
Because Dina was calling him out and saying like what a shithead he was.
Yeah.
And then he gets stabbed.
Yes.
Yes.
But then again, in the Fugees,
you know, and she gets killed too.
You should never kill somebody for just wanting to listen to the Fuji's.
I bet that record wasn't out in 94.
Might have been?
Might have been?
Might have been.
I'm not going to to familiar with the Fuji's, go check it out. Who's not familiar with the Fuji's kids? All the kids are not listening to Soundgarden or the Fugies.
I mean, I'm not really going to hang my hat on Soundgarden.
I was pretty drunk.
I like how the kids are talking at one point about like hiding in plain sight or something.
And the little brother goes, oh just like Bundy.
And it's like, oh you're now, this is your creep and everyone knows it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So Dina steals the cop's gun and he's...
Without a second thought.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah she's like we needed a gun. Yeah it comes in handy super fast though because she shoots someone right away.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Because there's like a lady with a knife with their straight razor that's cutting people up.
Yes she is like a girl from the 50s. She's from 53. Yeah not in that look she's not. Or maybe the was the milkman from 53 she's supposed to be 35 th th th th th th I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I to be to be to be thi thi. I thi. Yeah. thi thi. I thi. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I th. Yeah. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. I th. I th. Yeah. I th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. that look she's not. Or maybe the, was the
Milkman from 53? She's supposed to be from 35? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
So we go through this like montage of crimes being committed because Josh
has all the clippings. Yeah. And this one that's Billy Barker and it's just a kid wearing a scary mask beating someone to death with a pole in their. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I the a pole in their bed. I loved that. Billy Barker, holy shit.
I did love that.
And then they're all sitting there and they're like,
start doing this cool rhyme about the witch
that their town knows.
It's like their town rhyme.
I fucking Gibsonia didn't have shit.
No town rhyme.
No, I don't think we had a tholn, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like an an an an an an No town rhyme. No, I don't think we had a town rhyme that I can remember.
Probably would have been like an Andrew Dice Clay joke or something.
Yeah.
Sounds, sounds, right.
Dickery, duck.
I don't know where that's going.
You don't want to. You don't want to.
I mean, if it's going to rhyme, I think I can probably guess.
The mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse mouse probably guess. The mouse ran up the clock.
I hate that I'm doing the entire joke right now and I...
It's so gross.
Change the subject.
They steal an ambulance.
They do steal an ambulance.
Which they make no efforts to secure later in the film so that they can continue
to have the ambulance?
Like they just get out and leave the doors open. They go the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the thoom. thoom. thoom. thi just just just just just just just just just thoom. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thoom. thoom. thoom. toooooooooooooooooooooooa.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a. tooooombue. thoooo. I the door so the battery doesn't die, lock it. You ding don't.
They go back to the site, this movie is so silly, they go back to the scene of
the accident, the car is still there, why? Why is it not been towed? There's no crime
scene tape up, it's not being investigated anymore. Get the car out of here. It's on the side of the road, it's fine. It's th. It's the side of th. It's the side th. It's th. It's the side thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's on side side side side side side side side side side side side side side side thi. It's on thi. It's on thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's on side the the thi. It's the the thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's this thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's th. It's the the the the the the the th. the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. This thi. This movie. This is thi. This is the. This is when they find the bones wrapped up in chains.
Yes. That are the witch's bones. They're labeled with her name, F-I-E-R.
Oh, that's right. Yes. Sarah, Fear.
I just noticed that I wrote out the note, this is all falling into place for Josh.
He knows serial killers. Guess always spelled serial. Yeah, you're right. You did, didn't you?
You weren't even doing talk to text?
No, just stupid.
Sam gets another nosebleed.
She gets another nosebleed.
She gets another nose, touches her nose,
looks at the blood, and then touches the bones.
If you think something supernatural is going on their their their their is supernatural is their the bone is supernatural is the bone is going is supernatural is the bone is going to salt and burn the bones. Okay fine, fair. The Winchester hadn't taught them yet. I don't
know, it may have been on then. Who knows? Probably, honestly. And then a Jason man attacks them. I can't wait to see his movie. I was like, oh I hope I get to see his movie, the camp one. And then I the thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. the the the the the the the the they. I they. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. the. I the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. W. the. the. the. the. W. the. the. W. the. the. the see his movie, the camp one, and then I realized that's the next one. Yeah, 1978. Very excited for that.
And I get the, the, oh yeah, there's like an altercation in the street with Simon and the razorblade lady.
Yes, he's following her because she's, quote, hot. Yeah, oh, she's hot and deadly. And she loses a locket, which the cop finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds finds the cop finds the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the movie. the movie. the movie. the movie. the movie. the movie. the movie. the the the the too too too too too too too too too too too too ttoo too too too too too the the the deadly. And she loses a locket which the cop
finds in the street is like a clue. Yes, when did she first when he found the
necklace I was like but wait whose necklace was that? the necklace was that
who's necklace was that how you keep yourself from having a cloth and it
never really comes back. Who knows? I like that when Josh is nervous he tho that the to-you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the cop. the cop. the cop. the cop. the cop the cop the cop the cop the cop the cop the cop the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the te. te. te tip. te tip. tip. co tip. tip. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the contra code to himself. He's very cute. I was like, is that how you keep
yourself from having a boner? Because he does it every time that he sees a cane. Is that what you
do to stop a boner? Like just repeat something gross in your head or something stupid or something
weird? Really? I'm asking you since he really, I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I've never been a problem for me. I mean, yes, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I think, I th. I think, I think, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I that th. I th. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. to the the the the the to the the to you take your mind off the thing that is bringing the horny.
Got it.
Although at that age, they're just ripping out, you have no idea why you have a boneer.
Just bone dogs for days.
So, go back to the school, right?
And this is where we get all the horny teens horny teens horn up on each other. Teens always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always always. I their thi thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I I th. I th. I I I th. I, I th. I, I, I, I, I, I. I, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi, I thi, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I th school, right? Yeah. And this is where we get all the horny teens horning up on each other?
Teens always want to fuck.
I did think it was very funny that Josh and Kate couple off, which is very cute.
Yeah.
Um, you sort of get the impression that she's like, well, we might die.
Yeah, so why not?
Sam and Dina, of course are just going to the boat. Like they're immediately list like hands and jeans. And I was like, kids, what are you doing?
They are literal maniacs about.
You just saw them.
And then Simon's alone, he's like, well,
guess I'll take care of business.
They just started to jerk it off.
And you're like, this is weird.
Is there were, he's
like, did you make out? Did you make out? He says, do you guys all go to Poundown?
Me too. There's also this like sort of good old be yourself message for teens that's happening here. Sure, yeah yeah yeah, which I like too. It's a little, the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. tho. the. the. tho. tho. the. th. th. th. th. happening here. Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah, which I like. I like to. It's a little shoehorned into this horror film, but it's I appreciate it. I also
enjoyed the, why not make out with the nerd message that was in the... so they
they figure out that it's Sam that the monsters are after. Right. So they
trap them all in a room. Sam escapes through a like a vent system. Right. They they they they they they they they they they play they play they play they play they play they play the the the the they play the the their their their their their their their their their their their them all in a room, Sam escapes through a vent system. They lock the door and set them on fire, and they play fire starter, which I love.
But for a minute I was like, oh, this is like 13 ghosts where there's like this ghost of
this guy and then the sexy lady ghost and you know.
But I was excited because I was enjoying this and then I thought maybe I liked 13 ghosts. It's not the worst. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th I thought, maybe I liked 13 ghosts. It's not the worst. I think we gave it more shit than it needed.
Yeah.
I'm gonna go back and watch it
because I really liked all their little backstories.
Yeah, it had fun.
The guy with railroad spikes in his head.
Yeah, he was a railroad guy.
Yeah, then we figure out that.
Then we figure out that happens, they set them on fire and then all their like goopy pieces start to come back together, which is a thing I just fucking love.
I really like that.
It's the unstoppable terror for sure.
Yeah, and Kate is like, well let's just feed Sam to them if that's what they want, which
is fucking ruthless.
During this scene, Kate was giving me strong, Parker Posey vibes. She has that like, like, like, like, like she? Something about her face and her quick response. And she's like a real severe
attitude as well. Yeah. Love Parker Posey. Oh my god. I love the actress
Plankate. Yeah, she was great. Oh yeah. So yes, C. Berman. Yeah. soe theerman. Yeah. Who was the, thrown. Yeah. to be a the thiberman. to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S, the. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. S. A. S. A. S. A. A. S. A. S. S. A. A. A. S. A. A. A. A. A. the. the. the. the. A. the. th. S. S. S. A. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. Sian Jacobs. I love Jillian Jacobs. She's from here. She's one of ours.
Who was she?
She is a Pittsburgh, I think she's from Mount Lebanon.
Come with it now.
Yeah.
Probably the most beautiful Pittsburgh never.
Probably the most beautiful person ever come out of Pittsburgh.
Do not say Tom Atkins.
Uh, Michael Keaton is from the city. Mr. Rogers. He's beautifully hearted. Julian Jacobs has perfect bone structure. Tom Savinie.
Nope.
So they figure out that she's the key because she survived.
Right, and it seems like they're chasing, the bad guys are chasing her and her alone.
Right, right, right.
Oh, C. Berman, yes, C. Berman survived the attack at the late, at the camp. Yes. Yes. And earlier in the movie the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie, the movie the movie the movie the movie movie movie movie movie the movie movie movie the movie movie movie the movie movie movie movie movie the movie movie the movie th thi thi thi thi thi th. We th. We th. We th. We thi thi thi that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. the. Oh, C. Berman, yes, C. Berman survived the attack at the late, at the camp.
Yes. Yes.
And earlier in the movie, we learned that Simon's brother Timothy OD'd on the pills.
So they realized that they need to kill Sam and bring her back.
So Simon yells, let's Timothy this bitch. Oh my god. It it made me laugh out loud. It's very funny.
It's very fucked up and very funny.
And I just thought, were we this disillusioned in 1994?
Just the idea of using Timothy as a verb of ODing
and bringing someone back.
Her resurrecting someone.
Anomally, is that a verb?
No, I don't remember.
To Timothy would be a verb? Yeah.
Oh, action word, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
So Simon gets his like, his little redemption arc here, where he gets Josh the speech about,
why can't you just see in yourself what she sees in you, which is totally out of character
for this guy, and they do it only so that you care when he the Rollins speech. If you could see the you that I see. No, no, no, no.
You'd see yourself differently. Believe me.
You love that, though. You love to say it, too. It brings you such joy, like the look on your face right now.
Oh man. He has multiple books of poetry.
So does Jewel.
She had more than the one?
I don't know.
I thought the one was made fun of so much.
They probably printed more than one copy.
Oh yeah.
I worked at a borders and that book came out.
I owned it.
Someone gave it to me a birthday gift.
Good friend.
Not good. They had you that in a lunchable.
That's a good gift. So I, we learned earlier on as well that like,
because Simon's a dirty boy and didn't change his shirt after you got blood on it,
and, um, uh, Dina has blood on her shoe, which is Sam's blood,
both of them are Sam's blood.
So they were chase, the killers were chasing them because of Sam's blood. So now them are Sam's blood. So they were chase, the killers were chasing them
because of Sam's blood. So now they, um, Kate, Josh and Simon have put
X's exes of Sam's blood on their chest. It sucks. It sucks. To give... They're running decoy.
Yeah, it sucks for them. To give Sam enough time to overdose. They have this like elaborate
cocktail that she has
to take to kill herself. They give her no water. This is what I'm always
fucking harping on about. It's so weird. She's just dry swallowing all of them.
Give her some water for fuck sake. So she ends up throwing up and then they run
away from one of the killers who has killed Simon. And kick the last batch of pills away. Yeah, so then Dina drowns her in a lobster tank for a real long time. Brutal. And I'm a whole
time thinking, well we know the Epipen's will work on an OD. Do they work on a
drowning as well? I'm not sure how these things work. I don't think so. I think it's CPR that works on a drum. Yeah. I think it's th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thrown. I throwne. I'm throwne. I'm not throwne. I'm not thrownthey're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're th. I the. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they're of those sourdoughs are probably going to have a hard exterior you need
to get through.
Yeah.
Scorgious.
Holy Jesus.
And when she dies, when Sam dies and they bring her back, the killers vanish.
Yes, that's right.
Yes, that's right.
Wait, I have a note here that I want to discuss with you. First it says I hope I thi I tha tha tha tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho- tho- tho- tho- tho-s tho- tho- that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho-a. toooooo-s to-s to-s to-s toge. to-s to-s. toge. that's that's tho-s. First it says, I hope I die with cake all over my face. I'm not sure what that's about. Oh, because yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because Kate, or, yeah,
Kate has cake on her face before she gets put through the bread slicer. I hope I die with
cake all over my face. Yeah, that sounds right. Then I wrote a note here that says, I bet Alan just wrote he to axe in his skull from the to ask to axe to axe to axe to axe the question a question a question a question a question a question a question a question a question a question a question a question a question a question a question to axe to axe to axe to axe to axe to axe tox, he tox, he tox, he tox, he tox, he tox, he tox, to ask tox, to to to to to to to to to to to ask to ask to ask to ask to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeahthat I didn't. When it happened, I don't know, even know what happened. Someone got asked.
Sajun, he gets an axe in his skull from the Jason Man.
Yeah, oh yes, Simon, I guess.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I was just like, Alan's writing that right now.
We weren't watching the movie at the same time,
but I assumed you wrote it in that many Epipenns would give you a massive heart attack. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I think that'll probably kill you.
You know as soon as they started doing it though, kick-start my heart and started playing
in my hand.
I wish it had.
They should have played that.
That song would have been out by then?
Yeah, I think that million but tillion dollars?
They did.
It's not my running mix.
It's a great song.
It's the song I think of when I think of sports.
Yeah, sports and like race cars.
Yeah. Anything going fast?
Motorcycles, race cars, yeah.
Days of Thunder.
Da da da da da da.
So good.
Yeah.
So, Sam's name. so good today da da da da da da da da da da da da da so
Sam's name oh that's right there's like a cave with the witch hanging out
in it or something yeah Sam's name appears on the wall
I can't remember what it was under under it was under a bunch of other
it was under like Ruby Lane and Ryan Torres okay so basically the witch is turning people into mass murderers right to get her revenge on the town so why is she doing this this th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the to to thi the the to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to ty ty. ty toda ty to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the, so basically the witch is turning people into mass murderers. Right, to get her revenge on the town.
So why is she doing this to Sam?
She's gonna make Sam into a mass murderer.
Yeah, Sam's the new killer now.
Got it.
And Sam kills Dina.
Or stabs her at least.
Yeah, I don't think she kills her. I have Sam Kilzina, oh no they fighting. Yes, right.
And then to be continued.
Her brother doesn't hear it because he's jamming SoundGarden too loud.
I just want to point that out.
He was holding that bus with you.
There's a plot point of this as the mixtape.
And I wondered, like, did we ever find out about how teens make mixtape? I know what you've the the the thau? thau? I've thau? I've thau. thau. tho. I've thia thia thia thia thi. I've thi. I've thi. I've thi. I've thi. I've thi. I've tho tho thi. I'm thi. I'm thiou thioumia thioumia thioumia thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. thi. thi ti ti ti teeanananananananannn't tooeanananann't tooeananananed tooeaned tooea. thaea a thing and said yes they send Spotify playlist to people. Okay, all right I mean stick with the Times. Yeah, do what you
got to do. Yeah. So at the end of this movie this like climactic scene where Sam
has turned into some kind of monster and is attacking Dina and the brother has
just found out about it. He jumps up. Dina must have two phone lines.
And I just thought, Rob?
What a delight.
Anyway, to be continued.
What do you think of this bad boy?
You want to rate it?
Yeah, I do.
You go first.
I had a really fun time watching it?
Yeah. It was definitely the, in the, this isn't for me, but I had a really good time watching it anyway. I feel like it really is shining in those same ways that
freaky and happy death day had like sort of like a light-hearted vibe to what they were doing.
Absolutely. This isn't as joke heavy as either of those, but it was still pretty fun. Yeah. And I was alive in 1994.
I remember all these references that they're making.
So yeah, I would give this a Sate.
I would give it an eight.
Satan.
Saitan Hogue.
That would be you.
One Satan hoagie from Spack Brothers.
I loved it.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, here's the thing, Netflix teen programming, it sometimes gets me.
Like on a sick day, I will watch like four or five episodes of a Netflix teen series just to not think about anything.
And then I'll watch the rest of it when I feel better, too. Because I want to know how it ends. You know, I really enjoy their teen programming. I'm a 38 year old, I'm a 37 year old? How old? th? th? th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th t th. the te. te. te. the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. tine. tine. tine. tine. tine. tine. I t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t tine. I tine. I t. I t tod tod tod te. I te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. teen programming. Sure. I'm a 38 year old. I'm a 37 year, how old
am I? 37. 37. Wait, how old are you? 47. 47. I'm 37 too. Yeah. Just real rough 37. It's really
hard for all of us. I've really enjoyed it. I'm going to give it a saint. Just remind me, have you ever watched sex education? It's a teen show on Netflix?
No, it gets, it got, it's chilly and Anderson? Yes, it's fucking fantastic. Yeah, I gotta watch that.
It's really good. Next time I'm ill. You're not sick, you're ill. Yeah. Yeah. We did. We did that. Jane so, Jane so icy. I got chill bums on my neck. Was that last week? Who no? You know the same? Yeah. You. Yeah. We we we we we we we we we we we we we we that. Jane so I see I got chill bumps on my neck.
Was that last week?
Who knows that same as anymore?
It's weird to be here in our auxiliary studio.
I'd like to address something with you if I may.
Oh, please.
You brought something to the table.
I would like to bring up a review that we've received on Apple podcasts from a listener
named Jamie D.S. I'm going to read this this this this this th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho I'm tho I'm tho I'm tho I'm tho I'm tho I'm the. I'm tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. I'm to the. to thean. tooan. tooan. tooan. tooan. tooan. tooan. tooooooo. too. theK. I'm gonna read this to you.
Sure.
Very, very good.
Five stars.
This show is very, very good.
I'm sorry for writing a stinky review before.
I've listened to a zilien episodes since then,
and I have nothing but nice things to say about this show.
Did you look up Jamie D.SK?
Did the show? I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thr. thr. thr. the. thi. the. the. the. thi. the. the. thi. the. the. th. th. th. old review. Oh, geez, I'd like to know what your beef was. Jamie D.S.K. Write in, let us know. Or was there just like a diary entry that they wrote?
And they were like, you know what?
Out of the world, I'm going to send this really nice positive review?
Do you think the Jamie DSK wrote this? Because we've been shaming the review and they they they they were, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, thin, they, thin, thin, thin, they, thin, they, th, and they, and they're, and they're, and they're, like, like, like, and they're, like, and they're, like, like, and they're, and they're, and they're, and they're, and they're, like, and they're, and they're, and they're, and they're, and they're, and they're, and, and, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. thin, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. thin, like, they're. they're they're they're they're they're they're. they're their. they're. it back together. Also, imagine Jamie DSK leaving a
stinky review and then being like, got a zillion more episodes than me. What do you
do in Jamie DSK? What is your story? Reach out. I need to understand.
Like later they were just sitting around there like, you know what? I fucking
love the giggling. I gotta get back in there. I mean certainly I corrected my stance the stance on Return of the Living Dead. Right, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, the the the thi, the they, thi, thi, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, the, they, the, the, they, the, they, the, the, they, they, they, they, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, thi, they, they, thi, they, thi, they me, theyme, they, they me, theyme, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, there. I mean, certainly I corrected my stance on Return of the Living Dead. Right, and this came out, we got this review around the same time, so
it was like a time of revisiting. Okay, maybe it's our our Easter. A time of
rebirth. We pushed the stone aside and got a positive review. Yeah. Has anyone seen
Lazarus? In our defense for the thin skinness about reviews, we started doing this not to be popular
or to have anybody do anything, but to be two friends who got together and bullshitted.
We wondered if our friends would listen.
Yeah, for sure.
So like, humbled beyond belief that people who we don't know listen and enjoy this and
like send us beautiful, beautiful messages and reviews.
Oh, that's lovely. Sometimes I'm like, you live in another country from me.
I'll never go there probably.
No, I'd love to. Go to Iceland.
Oh yeah, yeah.
But like the bad reviews, I was like,
I didn't sign up for this.
Yeah, we didn't invite you in.
I know I'm doing a thing in public.
It doesn't mean you have to be a to be to be to be to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a d to be a d to be a d to be a d to be a d to to be a da to be a da to be a dick to me. Yeah. I think we just felt for a long time like we had invited people in.
Yeah.
And not you.
You weren't invited.
You don't like it.
Go pet a horse.
Go pet a horse.
For all I care.
In the words of Nick Kaminsky.
Hey, anyway, thank you guys so much.
We love hearing from you. Yeah, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to tho. tho. tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. tho. tha. tha. tha. the best. And you just, like the fact that anybody likes this still, the mind boggles.
Mm-hmm.
But why wouldn't they?
We're great.
Yeah, I don't know.
You want to be great again next week?
Yeah, I'll do a different movie?
Yeah, let's do a different movie.
Yeah, let's do a different movie.
thiiiii. Let's do a heavy metal movie from the 80s that I've never seen. I cannot believe one exists, but tell me more.
It's on Shutter. It's been on my list to see since I was like 15 years old.
It's called Black Roses. Okay. I'll watch it. I'm only assuming I'm going to love,
it's like finding a little hidden gem that I never knew I loved. Like a record that your favorite band put out that you didn't know they they they they th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the's the's the's the. the. thea' the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the was was was was was was was the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeea. to to to theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. the. For sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But to be clear, in the vein of Hell Hells LLC, the week after that we're doing
the next Fear Street movie. Mm-hmm. Uh-huh. I just don't want people to think we're giving up on it. Hell Hells, L.L.C. I just don't want people to think we're giving up on it. the the. the. to. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the next. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the the the the the next. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the next. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the next. the next. the next. the next. the next. the next. the the the the the the the the the the ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. the ne. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the like I can't wait to do another episode on this. That's so good because Rob turned to me and he was like you're
going to have to tell Alan we're doing this and I was like are we are we doing
this? You're not listening. I'm not gonna listen. A little lovely ding dong. A little lovely ding dong. Oh a little lovely ding dong. A little to the tell--a. to. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tell. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tell. the the the tell. the tell. the a lovely ding-dong, unless you're plotting to leave us a bad review, in
which case, go home. Hang it up.
Don't just do it because you know we're going to read it, either, you dick.
Don't do it because you know it's going to hurt our feelings.
Yeah, you're diggill.
God, we've got tougher than you are now, frankly.
So...
Over the tough hill.
Thanks for listening to another episode of Whearwolf Ambulance.
Alan's doing Namestay, he ends at me, so I'm just going to end this one with, Namaste.
Bye-bye.
Bye. Oh and pools, civeties sightings at the pool. No way to wait, Finland's to fulfill reviews.
Killing lads and levy face,
King Emily and his face.
Our parents are basket case, please make a kid in your grave.
E and Tee.
Marlowe and comedy reviews hungry, Brian from Wayne's and Stephen Gang.
E-M-T.
We live deliciously bad temperatures of bees crazily come to die.
A pair of novel activities from Mr. Rogers to eat in E-M-D.
E-M-D. EFT, EFT!