Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 82- Coraline (2009)
Episode Date: May 16, 2016In this week's very special episode of Werewolf Ambulance, we put our usual potty mouths on hold and behaved in a very passably kid-friendly way to discuss the 2009 film "Coraline." Special topics inc...lude: what two childless people think that children probably like, these same childless people offering advice to children because we are exactly the kind of people from whom you would want your children to take advice, our amazement at the beauty of stop motion animation, jokes from the internet, drinking because of office jobs and the actual distressing scenes in this children's movie. Have you seen this movie? Do you/your kids like it? Tell us what you think at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance. Also, feel free to email us at werewolfambulance@gmail.com and you might hear yourself on a future edition of "Mailbag!" Please also check out this week's sponsors Cryptocurium (http://www.cryptocurium.com) and Seventh Church Ministries (https://seventhchurchministries.wordpress.com/) to check out their amazing wares: the monthly subscription box called the Parcel of Terror and new publications of horror zines, respectively. You're going to love them both. Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast.Â
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello, and welcome to a very special episode of Werewolf Ambulance.
I'm Alan and I'm here with my friend Katie.
Hello.
And, thrown.
to a very special episode of Werewolf Ambulance.
I'm Alan.
And I'm here with my friend Katie.
Hello, Katie.
Oh, hi, Alan.
See, I already messed it up.
At thrown. It's true. Katie, I have a quick thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi?? thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thoomk. thoome, thoom. th. th. th. tho, tho, tho, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tha. to, to, to, to-a. to-a. to-a. to-a. tooooooooooooooooooo. to, to, to-a. tha I didn't swear. It's true. Katie, I have a quick question for you.
Yes.
Why is Frankenstein always laughing?
Is he?
Why is he?
I don't know.
Because his doctor keeps him in stitches.
The best sound you just heard is me leaving the room.
This is our family-friendly episode where we're not going to swear or make any kind of jokes.
No, no working blue if you will.
So hey kids.
Also, good thing we're drinking during this episode.
Guys, I've had a terrible day.
So we're drinking.
So we'll just not swear.
Just slurs.
Just a lot of racial slurs.
They'll go right over your children's heads.
I feel like right here is where we should do like, I'll be like,
but, fart.
Crap, and then you can just copy and paste them over things
that I say later.
Okay, I like it, I was thinking.
I was thinking.
Fudge. Fuddle sticks. Oh that's nice. Poughkeepsie was one that I saw
online that you could substitute for a square word. Is that for a particular
swear word? I don't know. People are just like to do is this like a
baster joke or? Poughkeepsie. Ah, perky! It's not bad actually. Yeah it's a good as an expletive. Yeah, it's got some power behind it.
I hope we can be funny.
I just feel like all we have is blue, you know what I mean?
Oh, you want funny?
Yeah, I guess.
Where does Judge Dracula work?
I don't know.
Nightcourt.
Garshish sake.
Bum, bum, bum. There's bull, th, th, th, bull, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, thum, thum, thum, thum, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. I tho, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, tho, tha, tha, th. I th know. Nightcourt. Oh, for gosh, it's sake. There's bullshan in there.
Oh, sorry about that.
So, whatever we have a lull, I'm just going to read these jokes
or are written by little kids about monsters.
Where did you find that?
Oh, it's called the internet.
Oh, thank goodness. So this week we're going to talk about a family-frily-ffffffffffffffffffff, th f f f f f f f f f f fftha, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th-a, thin, thin, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th. Oh, to to to to to to to to to th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha. Oh, tha, tha, tha. Oh, tha. So, tha. Oh, tha. Oh, tha. You know, it was more distressing than I expected it today.
Having even read it, it was just still more distressing.
Coraline.
Coraline.
Written by Neil Gaiman, Gayman.
I think it's Guyman.
I've heard it pronounced both way.
I've to the today.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He who directed a nightmare.. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the. to. the. the. the. to. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It.............................................................................................................................................................................. And James and the Giant Peach. Oh, I've never seen that, but I loved the book as a child.
It's really fun.
You guys read that.
Do you like reading?
You should like reading.
Yeah, reading is fundamental.
Yeah.
Babbah.
But crap, Pough, Pough Kipsy. I like that as a little bit of a mantra, where you're just like, you're at you're at you're at your you're at your you're at your you're at your, you're at your, you're at your, you're at to to to to to to to to, you're at to, you're to, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, do, do, do, do, do, do, you're, you're, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, to, to, to, to, to, to, you to, you to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, that, to, that, to, that, you're, you're, desk and like everything's just going around and you're like, but crap, poxipsy, but crap, piquipsy.
It's not bad, honestly.
No, I think we could do worse.
I say worse things all the time.
You can't say that.
You can't say that.
You can't say that.
You can't stop me from saying worse.
So do we mention that we're doing. Did we mention that? Okay. We did. And we're going to do spoilers. So if you and your kids haven't seen it, are you kids listening haven't seen it?
Here's some questions. Do you think our listeners have children? And if so, are they
listening to this? That's true. That's true. that's their kids. Jason are your kids listening. Hi Jason's kids? Hi, your dad does great. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi th th thi thi thi thi th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th th th th th th th th th th th th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do thi. Do thi. Do thi. Do thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi.. Not in a creepy way. I just have seen them. I've seen them.
They're very cute.
They go to Disney World sometimes.
They do go to Disney World sometimes.
So like maybe you could increase that Cryptocurian money, Jason.
I'm just kidding.
Tell your daddy to pay us more.
Katie. I know, I'm sorry. I'm so th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. I'm th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. the. th. th. the. to What kind of hot dogs do monsters like best? Weeners?
Can I say weeners?
Hollow weeners?
Oh, man, I was so close.
These are great jokes, kids.
They're deease.
So you want to get into Coraline?
Sure.
Is this the first, this is the version you've seen this film?
Yes. Yes, first time. I love stop motion animation. I love clay. I love, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. I tha. th. tha. tha tha. to tha. thoen. thoen. tho. thoen. thoom. thoom. thoomea. thoomea. thoenoleck. thoen. thoen. thoen. thoen. thoen. tho. tho. tho. tho. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. toge. toge. t. toge. toge. t. toge. t. toge. toge. toge. toge. t. t I love everything about this It's beautiful. They did this with all with 3d printers
Which was like the first time that's happened
This must have taken how long did this movie these movies always always take a thousand years to make? Geez there's so much more long because the book was from like 2006 and this came on like 2009. Oh? Oh two thousand nine? Yeah, I tho th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. th. Yeah, th. th. Yeah, th. th. Yeah, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. the th. the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the ti ti ti ti ti the thro thro thro thr- thr- thr- thook thousand, that's like a thousand years. As far as my math goes. Do you kids like math? 2009 minus 2006 is 1,000, right? And you can be a
financial advisor like me when you grow up. Or a computer operator like me.
Oh yeah. A weirdest job description on earth. That's not your job title is it?
It's computer operator.
It was the 1940s?
Car driver.
Car driver.
Radar, man.
You're literally, your literal job pitters, computer operator.
I wish you would have helped me operate my computer today when I lost all my stuff.
Because I'm the worst.
And don't tell me I should have backed it up because I hate myself. Oh. That's why I'm drinking. No. Kids. Drinking is
not a way to solve your problems but it does make you feel better temporarily.
So like... But no you did it! You did it! That was bad.
I don't have to believe that. Fiddle sticks. Pough kibsie.
Okay, and I talk about our, you know what kids like to hear about office jobs?
So kids, let me tell you about tax codes.
Don't you hate it when you don't get the garbage out in time?
Anyway, and you hear the truck coming on the street in the morning and you're like too like too like too like too too too too too too too too too too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too like too late too like too late too Oh, fiddle sticks. But gifty! So this movie starts off with I think a very
scary opening with that doll being dissected. With the weird hands, the like Edward's
scissor hand like hands. Yeah, does it, I think because of Nightmare Where Christmas I like
just wrapped this dude up the Henry sell like with Tim Burton. Yeah. Well I've actually one thing
I really liked about this movie is I was like, see Tim Burton,
you're not cornering the market on this kind of thing, you know?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
I feel like Neil Gaiman has even taken it and sort of run with like the little kid
should be okay with the spooky stuff. Yeah. I mean, I watched terrible thi thing thing thing thing thing things th don't have a child. You were thinking that?
I was thinking, obviously I don't, do I?
I would remember if I did.
I was thinking, would I let my child watch this?
It's very creepy.
And then I was like, what were you watching when you were eight?
Like horrible, horrible, horrible things.
And like real sex on HBO late at night. Oh god. Whoops, shouldn't have got that cable package, parents.
Oh, God.
Yeah, mess me up.
I wonder if our early television viewing
is one of the things that bonds us so closely
because you seem to have watched all the same terrible stuff that I did.
Yeah, except I was 10 years younger and much more malleable.
Just my parents used television as a babysitter.
Oh yeah.
And I was into that.
Because TV's pretty great.
Kids, playing outside is fun, but so is TV.
So it was a Silver Spoons Marathon.
Silver Spoons I wasn't that into.
But did you watch?
Was it Life Goes On?
the ti?
to the world sort of at that point? Yeah, I mean, life goes on was a little past my time. Okay.
Yeah, so I would have already been out in the world sort of at that point.
Yeah, probably.
Out in the world, like 13, working at, working your job, punching that clock.
Boop. I did have my first job at 13.
Oh, buddy. That's not even a law anymore.
I was sweeping up construction sites in the summertime.
Oh, jeez. Kids, manual labor and food service teach you character.
Always be kind to food service employees, which you will be if you ever work in it.
So just get out there and earn a few bucks.
Send out some resumes.
Yeah, why don't you help your parents out? What are you doing all thing?
You're expensive. You are so expensive. That's why I don't have you. I don't think.
Are we doing a good job?
This is a great thing for two child-free people to do, you know, to be like what a kid's like. I don't know. Tickle them.
Dad, what's midlife on we going to be like? Well, I have a podcast for you. Put in this cassette tape. Oh, what if someone tapes this over a
casingle and displays it for their kids?
Singles were single songs, usually like four songs on a cassette.
On a cassette was a piece of plastic that had some like tape?
Magnetic tape.
That had that had tunes on it. Yeah, it's like, I was gonna say it's th that's th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the is the is the is the is the is the is the is that's the. the is that's that's that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was tap. that was that was that was that was that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. that tha. that that that that that that that tune had tunes on it. Yeah, it's like, I was gonna say it's like a CD is now. You're like the CD is, do you, you little, you little turds.
You little fiddle sticks.
Turds, Poughkeepsie, butts.
Oh, I'm having fun with this.
Hey Katie.
Yeah.
Why are graveyards noisy?
What?
I mean, like how you're covering it, so I can't see the answer.
Why are graveyards noisy?
Because of all the coffin!
Ah!
These jokes are fantastic.
They are pretty good.
So we start off with the ripping open of the doll, the just dismembering of it by these
pointy metal fingers.
Yeah.
Totally creeped film.
Very long, very slender, upsetting fingers.
The design of this film was the first thing that struck me.
Like when you get into the world.
Yeah.
It's basically so it's about a young girl, Coraline, who is, I think, maybe 10 or so.
About then, I would say, yeah.
Or at least in this.
And she lives with their parents, they've just moved to a new town, and they live in this sort
of dilapidated mansion that's been converted into apartments.
And her parents are writing for a garden catalog, I think, is my understanding. Yeah. It's they they th th th thi, it thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, and thi, it's thi, it's thi, and she's thi, it's thi, thi thi, and she's thi, and she lives thi, and she lives thioue, and she's thi, and she thi, and she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she th. And she's, and she's th. And she's thi, and she's thi, and she's thi, and she's thi, and she's thi, and thi, and thi, and thi's thi's thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thithat, yeah. They're like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
They're very dismissive.
Yeah.
Come on, Judge John Hodgman.
Step your game up.
I loved Judge John Hodgman in this.
I loved him.
He did some musical numbers, which I really liked.
The,
Do you know who see something that this had something to do with they might be giant. Kids they might
be giants were a band well before you were born. Still making children's albums.
They speak children's albums? That's so strange. Yeah they're really good too,
they're fun. I love they might be giants. Nerd music for nerds. Yeah, I like that. I like that. And I liked th. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. N. I liked. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi might might might the their thi th. N. N. N. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might their their their their their thi. N. N. N. N. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi might might might thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. And the mother is Terry Hatcher, whom I also really liked in this.
What would I know Terry Hatcher from?
The Adventures of Lois and Clark.
What would I know Terry Hatcher from?
Desperate House Wives.
What would I know Terry Hatcher from?
I'll just show you a photo over.
How about that?
You didn't watch Adventures of Loa?
No.
But Dean came so hunky in it.
This woman?
Oh, I see.
What do you know her from?
Just being famous?
Yeah.
No, I've never seen the adventures of...
I watched a little bit of Smallville.
Does that count?
I don't know what that is.
It was another Superman.
I literally only watched? The last thing I saw him in was that bio about a, what's the guy who killed his wife in California? Scott
Peterson? Remember that guy? It's a kid-friendly episode. What? It's our kid-friendly episode.
We're talking about it. Oh my god, yeah, I'm sorry. Kids.
Murder is bad. It's our kid-friendly episode. It's not for them. It's just okay for them.
You know what I'm saying? We have a large adult audience we have to deal with here.
It's not adult, like XXX, like just grown-ups who are on Facebook. You know what I mean?
Kids, three Xs means poison. Stay away from it at all cost.
It's true. Did you say stay away from it at all cost? Oh it at all cost. I am much mouth, huh?
No, I just am deaf.
And I'm also generally yelling, so it's hard for me to hear over that.
Also, I'm just getting drunkers, we're 13 minutes in.
I'm sorry, guys.
Sometimes mommy and daddy's have bad days.
For momies and daddy's friends that they listen to on the internet.
Yeah. The mommy and daddy and daddy and's and daddy's friends that they listen to on the internet.
Yeah.
The mommy and daddy in this movie are not doing a great job.
No, they're terrible momies and daddies.
But she's not doing a great job of being a child either.
What?
She's just kind of a teast.
theysts.
I really identified with her. I was a kid, yeah. You just swore again. I think I was a real big pain in the took us when I was a kid. I like just copying and pasting over.
I was lonely a lot of the time, so I'm sure I was pretty annoying.
You had a sibling though, you're a sibeling though.
Six years older.
Oh, that's hard.
Yeah.
So my sister and I didn't really start to to get to get to get to get to get to to the to to the to to the to the to the to the the to the to we was terrible. She's always looked out for me. She's a good sister. That's lovely. I love her. Yeah. So her parents are kind of ignoring her. Yeah, because they're
just trying to finish this garden catalog I guess. Yeah, but her mother and father, they're super dismissive.
Yeah, like kind of to the point of like, yo, why do you have abee. Yeah, he was added. He was not in the book. No, is that true?
Yeah, he's an additional, he's,
which one of the scariest things in this movie is like,
he's what happens to him from the other mother.
His bicycle helmet is the bee's knees.
I feel like that would have horrified neighbor kid who just talks a lot
and probably has a little crush on Coraline,
Bugser and whatever.
And then the other people that live in the apartment building
are two sort of spinster.
I can't tell if they're, I guess they're not sisters.
They're different by French and Saunders, the comedic duo from England. Okay.
Saunders was half of Absolutely fabulous, if you watch that.
Oh yeah, all right.
And French and Saunders were like kind of tied up with the young ones and stuff.
So we were like old school like punk rock comedians.
That's cool.
I wondered why they got such high billing.
That must be by.
Yeah, they're pretty. Like when I was watching this with my partner Missy and she was like, oh that's French and Saunders and I was like, wow!
Like it just kind of, yeah, it's really cool.
They also have huge boobs.
Yeah, which I feel I can say because this movie makes use of their huge boobs.
Yeah, I was like, their huge animated breasts.
Movie, this is our non-swearing episode.
Yeah, what are you doing? I think you can do it real quick. Ready? No. And then their upstairs neighbor is Mr. Bobinsky.
Oh God, I love him.
Who's McShane, right?
Ian McShane?
Yeah.
He's the, he's Swearengen from Deadwood.
Yeah.
There's like a running gag on the Mike and Tom Eat Snacks podcast.
I don't if you've ever listened to that. was offered the role Swaringen. And he got laryngitis because he'd been out
karaoke with McShane the night before.
And McShane like took advantage of this whole situation.
So he is like a beef with McShane, which I really love.
I like calling A&M McShane, just McShane.
That's what he calls him.
That's what he calls him.
That's what he called him.
That's a the worst.
Tom Kavana's on the flash.
He's like a actor, actor.
Look at me, I have a job.
Guess what?
Tom Kavanaugh, so do I.
And today I lost all my files.
Oh my God.
Okay.
I'm not letting it again.
I will not mention it again. So that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. the the the the the the the the tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, tho, tho. that, that, that, tho. that tho. that that that's thoo. tho. th not mention it again. I will not mention it again.
So that's pretty much, oh and the other character that's in this movie is the cat.
Oh yeah, Keith David, right?
Keith David, so strange.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Man, he's so cool.
Yeah.
He's been in a lot of things that you the time, the longest fight in cinema history and they live.
Oh really?
It's so long.
Oh, really?
I've never seen.
Or if I've seen it, I don't remember the fights.
Oh, Roddy Piper is.
Oh, yeah.
All right.
Sorry, I don't need a fairy ring that she runs into, which is actually just over top this really deep well. Checkoff's well. That's going to come back later on in the in the movie and
she gets poison ivy on her hands or poison oak. And then she's smashing bugs. She's smashing like
the thioaa like blistery hands and I was just like, what are you doing? Don't do that. That's gross. Is a maniac. Just a maniac.
Yeah.
In going through the house, she's exploring the house as well as the outdoors.
And she finds a tiny door.
Yes.
Which we have discussed on this podcast before,
that we both have tiny doors in our houses and are afraid of them.
Katie just looked at the door that it's going to be like, ROW! So, I don't believe in ghost, and I never have.
Never in your whole life.
I mean, I probably do with the whole life.
I'm going to tell you this, and then immediately
discredit everything I just said.
Sure.
I'm totally terrified of ghosts.
But I don't believe in them. Like I don't believe in their existence. I'm totally terrified of them.
Okay, well I don't think that's completely unreasonable.
Like I'm pretty afraid of...
No.
Well, I'm just afraid of like regular everyday things, so it's hard for me to even venture into the world of like fantasy things I might be afraid of
because I'm so afraid of like sharks and traffic and elevators, old people,
grocery carts.
Uh-huh, grocery, why are you afraid of grocery carts?
I don't know, I don't know, like run over your foot.
I have this thing of like, I always look at something and I'm like, how can this hurt me the most?
And if somebody like runs it into the back of your ankle and cuts your achilles,
and it rolls up the back of your leg, like a Venetian blind, which can happen. This is literally what my life is like.
I used to be terrified of escalators.
Escalators are terrifying and also in the 90s, they really made a big deal out of being afraid
of escalators.
Oh my god.
So back to my cardboard.
Ghost story.
So a friend of mine that's a that his grandfather's ghost haunted their attic. And there was a bedroom in the attic. How old were you in this happen?
Oh, I don't know, 22?
Oh, cool, yeah.
So I'm like, well, whatever, I mean, I'm just staying your attic then.
So I crash in the attic.
Of course, you are.
the thea the.
their books. I have a huge collection of them that I bought at a yard sale recently.
Yes, if you ever want to get in on that.
They make Dungeons and Dragons ones too.
Yeah, there's one of those right up there.
Oh, nice.
So I stay in the room and in the tiny door swings open? And I was like, well, sitting on the couch.
And so I just go downstairs and sit on the couch and wait for everybody to wake up.
So grandpa lived in the tiny door, huh?
Yeah.
Well, what's behind this tiny door is basically like a replica of their home, but nicer?
Yeah, like more what Coraline wants, which is yeah, that's pretty basic. Kids, are your parents giving you
enough food and attention? I don't think any kid thinks that they're giving
them enough food and attention, you know what I mean? True. And then you look back
at your childhood and you're like, why wasn't anybody paying attention to me?
And then your therapist is like, here's a bill and? Is this okay?
Are we doing a good job?
Hold on Katie, let me tell you about a good job or not.
Katie, I have a quick question for you.
Yes. What do you get if a huge Harry Monster steps on Batman and Robin?
What? I don't know.
Flatman and Ribbon?
That was actually pretty good. That one's actually pretty good.
That one's actually pretty good.
Oh, here's my favorite of the really terrible ones.
What huge scary Japanese monster is a rap singer?
I don't know.
Unless I guess.
Godzilla Ice.
Sweet. Sweet, Jesus.
Fiddle sticks!
Oh, Syracuse.
Oh, Syracuse is nice.
Yeah, I like the way it flows.
So she goes through the tiny door and there's like a purple, I love the color purple,
because it denotes something fantastical is happening.
Sure. It goes to the purple tube, ends up in the other house, that's just like her house, but
kind of cooler.
Like there's, she's got a boring painting of a little kid in blue, like doing something
dumb at her house.
Kids are always doing something dumb, aren't they?
Just kidding, kids. And at the other house, it's like all evil-looking, licking on a a a little little little little little little little little little little little little, like, like, like, like, like, like, And at the other house it's like all evil looking, licking on ice cream coming. Wearing like a little Lord Fonteyroix outfit.
And she meets her other mother.
Who looks just like her mother except with a flat iron tear, a dress and buttons for
eyes which is so disconcerting. Turns out buttons for eyes is real creepy.
Super creepy? Yeah.
And I hadn't really thought about like how, because I remember the plot of this, it's you
know, you get the buttons for eyes. Right. But I hadn't thought about like viscerally seeing,
not that they, there's a scene in which buttons are stitched on to one's eyes, but like really
seeing, like, I don't know. It was very distressing. And it just kept getting brought up. Yeah. This was gonna happen to Corolla. And then there were kids who were like, gee, we let her sew the buttons.
And I was like, you kids, why?
So spooky.
So spooky.
So spooky goes kids.
Who is this movie for?
Is this for children?
I think so?
Okay, just making sure.
Yeah, I think it's for kids. like those Disney movies like watch her in the woods and no or escape from
which mountain these were like Disney movies from the 70s that people's
watched evidently I would like to watch escape from which mountain yeah it
was really fun I don't know this doesn't seem to have a rating on Wikipedia
because why would I get useful information on Wikipedia?
Her other father is instead of being kind of like a put-upon dad who's being
muzzled around by the mom he is like a piano playing gregarious exuberant
kind of fun dad yeah he's real sleepy in the other world in our world but in
the other world he's very up and yeah where it has a pompadour if I recall
yeah playing the player piano where the hands come out and move his hands on the keys.
That's pretty sweet.
Yeah.
Also should have been a like, oh,
that's probably going to be problematic, huh?
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
Let's see what IMDB says.
It was PG.
That's cool. It's just stressing.
Yeah, I think parental guidance is probably a suggested thing for this movie.
I'm just podcast. Sorry, I was eating popcorn during the break.
You didn't know we had a break, but we did. We were on the internet.
A little peek behind the curtains, I'm always eating.
Speaking of eating, yeah. What do witches put on their bagels?
Locks? Scream cheese.
Oh, that's not even good.
No one was not even good.
Which is don't do a lot of screaming, do they?
I guess they do. It's fine, who cares?
I think if you start tackling these jokes.
I know, I need to not parse this through.
I'm just assuming they were written by children because they're so terrible. Yeah. They sound like popsicle stick jokes.
Oh, I love popsicle stick jokes.
Me too. Also, you know what I love? Yeah, popsicles.
They got a whole freezer of them downstairs.
Do you? Why am I not eating one? You might in the brick?
You might in the brick. Kids, if you have other father, which they call themselves were your other mother and your other father.
And they have like a big meal which included a full roast turkey for three people, two adults
in a child.
It seemed a little wasteful, but.
She was tearing it up.
She was tearing it up.
They had like lazy Susan's full of everything you wanted. Because in the our world or in Coroline, our our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, or in, or in, or in, or in, or in, or in, their, their, or in, their, or in, their, their, their, their, their, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, their, to, to, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, which, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, which, to, which, to, to, which, to, to, to, to to to to to to their, which, their, their, their, their, to their, to to to to their, to to their, to their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they were serving her food that was just like green sloppy bits. Yeah. Brown sloppy bits, like the
most unappetizing food. Don't you hate when your parents make you dinner?
Wait until you're an adult and you would kill a person for someone to make you
dinner. Just somebody make me something. Who's the main dinner maker in your house? Oh me? Once Rob left an oven on for like 16 hours. So he's it's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah, th. Yeah. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.......... Yeah...... Yeah.... Yeah.. Yeah... Yeah. Yeah... It. It's. Yeah. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah house? Oh me. Oh, man. And once Rob left an oven on for like 16 hours.
No, he's not alone.
Was it a slow cook?
No, I think he took a frozen pizza out and just walked away.
Just, he was done.
But he's getting better.
And he's a good griller.
OK.
Also, I feel like I've can't get behind that.
Also he doesn't listen to this podcast at all so we can say anything we want about.
Ah, he's a good dude. Good dude. Yeah, you definitely. I lucked out. I got a good dude. Yeah.
Well he lucked out. Well he luck Yeah, but I really enjoy doing it. Do you? Yeah, I do.
I used to, but now I find it to be a bit of a chore.
But then sometimes you make a really delicious dill and cucumber potato salad.
Yeah, I'm going to eat that.
It's downstairs?
I already ate all this popcorn.
And now I'm sweating beer so much. Sometimes when you drink beer and then you sweat, you sweat beer. I had a quick question.
That's a little bit of a diversion as we are just diverting constantly from this movie.
Sure.
Did you have a favorite like horror-themed kid show or kids' movie when you were kid?
Are you afraid of the dark?
100% hands down.
Yeah, tell me about, I've never seen, are you afraid of the dark? Are you afraid of the dark was a th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, was th, was th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, the thi, thi, thi, thi, to, to, to, to, to, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi?, thi? to to to to to to to to to to to to horror sort of show that was on in America
it was on Nickelodeon on Saturday nights which was a special called Snick
Saturday Night Nickelodeon. It was like four shows that they would show every
Saturday night including Roundhouse which I also loved which is not a horror
related but really shaped my sense of humor I think but it was basically like
there were these constant characters who were kids who got together in the woods and told stories to each to each to each to each to each to to to to to to their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I was, their. I was, their. I was, their. I was, their. I was, their. I's. I.. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. And, their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their in the woods and told stories to each other.
Nice.
And then the rest of the show would be like the actual story and those would always be different
actors.
Some of them were like really disturbing.
Like I remember one where a girl was like locked in a farmhouse and couldn't go outside
or she'd be torn apart by dogs.
And I was just, as a child who desperately feared dogs, and an adult who kind of fears dogs, I remember being like, uh-huh.
That's terrified.
Yeah.
And there's one where like a girl finds like a ghost in the mirror at a house and the ghost
is writing, help me on the wall, but it's backwards because she's inside the mirror.
Sure.
It's like super creepy stuff. And they're all on YouTube. I have, I regularly do. So you can go back and visit it and it still holds up. I mean, it's not scary anymore, but I'm like, this is really good.
It's really fun.
Canadiens know what they're doing as a general rule.
Don't you agree?
Like if a Canadian, I feel like Canadian stuff is just better quality.
They're like, all right, we're doing this and this is how we're in thinking about it? I mean, I think Saul would argue that that's not necessarily the case.
But that had an Australian influence and as we know, Australians, mm-mm.
Just kidding, sorry you guys agree, we do have a large listening audience in Australia.
And I feel like they hate us because we're always saying stuff like this.
USA, USA, USA.
Could we just be like North America?
Because I wish I was Canadian.
I really do.
Soon, a lot more of us are going to wish that.
Well, not if Hillary gets in, I'll be all of us
I'll be all of us thrown to be that.
I feel like either way a lot of people are going to be Canadian.
You know what? Canada better hope that Hillary Clinton gets elected. that, that, that, that, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th. to. to. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. thi, thi, the thi, the thi, thi, thi, I'm thi. I'm thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I to, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th th th th th th th th th th thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thi. I thi. I to be elected so that like all of us will come to Canada. Whereas if Hillary Clinton gets elected, you're going to get the worst of ours.
You know what I mean?
You don't want Trump supporters moving there.
Oh no, you don't.
No, you don't.
I don't think I have either.
Yeah, I don't even see them on the internet. I mean, like my internet is very thia thia. I thia. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thinininininin. th. th. th. thin. thin. thi. thi. thi. I thin. I th. I thin. I th. I thin. I don't thin. I don't th. I don't to th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't thi. I thi. I thi. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. to to th. th. to to to th. to thr. th. thi. th. th. th. th see them on the internet. I mean, like, my internet is very cold down. Yeah. And I don't read the comments ever.
Hey, kids?
Never read the comments.
Oh, man, that is a good piece of advice for kids.
Do you have any other good advice for kids?
Always go to the dentist.
Like, don't be afraid. It's suck. to the dentist. to the the dentist. the the the the the. the. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t t t t t t t t t t t t t to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the. toda. to. toda. toda. thea. their. their. their. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. t toda. today. te. te. te. te. te. te. toda. te. te. te. te. toda. Kids. Kids.then it's just you're just prolonging it. And then you just have to go to the dentist a lot.
Yeah, just go to the dentist like every six months or every even people once a year
I think you're probably fine. Yeah, yeah. Brush, brush three times a day. Floss. I'm glad that we could get our dental hygiene bits. Yeah, it's important. Yeah, I'm that that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the. th. to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. thea. tean. tean. teaneanus. tea. tea. tea. thea. thea. thea. th you on that. Don't ever smoke. I loved smoking, though. I had so much fun smoking.
And also when I went to college,
I made so many friends smoking.
Like, that's how I made all my friends
was just smoking outside buildings.
So like, smoke, but only in college.
Definitely don't smoke. Just quit when you get out. And the the rest the rest the rest the rest the rest the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I made thoes. I made thoes. I made. I made. I made. I made. I made. I thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I made the. I made the. the. thr. thr. throes. thoooooooooooooooes. thooooooooooes. thr. thr. thr. thr. 't smoke. It's okay if they do for a little bit though.
Let's see, always leave 12 inches between you and your dance partner for the whole of the ghost.
You don't want to get pregnant.
Yeah. Just be cool. Yeah. And, you know, that person brought you your food. Yeah. You got sustenance from them. Remember how we were just talking about how you want someone to make
food for you? Yeah. That's what they're doing. I mean, they're not making it, but there's a whole series of
things that happen. Try different food. Try something outside of your comfort zone. Yeah, for sure. And you're going to be rewarded. And you to to to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded to be rewarded the thi their their their the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. the. the. thea. thry some peepinbub you'll like it. Yeah and you can get it totally
vegetarian totally delicious. Nice. Talk to your grandparents because they have a
lot of interesting things to say. I'm like so a part of me feels very sad that like
my parents were so and not involved in my childhood. This is where I'm I'm getting into therapy now. th. th. th. th. th lucky to have been raised by grandparents because I like learned so much more about the world and about history
and what like being an immigrant in America.
Yeah.
I guess kids these days don't have, likely don't have parents who are immigrants in America.
Sure they do.
Not probably not our listening audience there in Pittsburgh.
Don't ever be ashamed of needing therapy. Oh thapy thapy thapy. Oh thapy. Oh, thapy, tha tha tha tha tha to tha to tha tha to be, tha that, to be, thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thi, to be, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, thea, theaa-augh, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, apy. Oh my god, therapy's the best.
Yeah, it's the best.
I grew up with a lot of stigma about that and since, you know, I've done it, it's amazing.
We're getting really deep here.
Yeah, kids need, these are life lessons that kids need.
I just want to go back to smoking for a second though. I really want to move on for all the parents parents parents parents parents parents parents parents parents parents parents the parents the parents the parents the parents the parents to to to the parents to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to. I to. I'm. I'm. I'm. I to. I to. I to. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to that. I. to that. that. to th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. thi. thea. thea. thia. thea. thi. thi. I that that to that to that that that to that to thi. I want to move on for all the parents out there. All right, sorry. Eat pizza.
Oh, everybody, everybody knows that.
How do you fix a jackal lantern, Katie?
How?
With the pumpkin patch.
That's good.
That one I really like.
Oh my god, we haven't talked about Coraline.
Oh yeah.
We are very far into this episode.
Just giving unsolicited advice to children and all of our adult listeners are like, who? No.
You're entirely wrong.
So she goes to the other world.
Keith David the cat comes up and is sort of like giving her the lay of the land.
And he's kind of the harbinger.
That's something bad's going down here and she should watch herself.
He's like aware of all of these things but hasn't been able to tell people in the real world because he can't speak in the real world basically.
Yeah. We forgot to say that Babinski,
Yeah, in McShane's character, has a well-trained mouse troop.
Oh yeah, circus act. And he keeps coming up to her in the real world and saying, oh my mice have a message for you. Mm-hmm. And it's like, don't th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, they. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I I I, I, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, I's, I's, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm thi,. Yeah. And then he's like, I don't know what they're talking about.
And he walks away, you're like, a bum, boom,
mhm.
Why doesn't she listen to that, though?
Kids listen when people give you advice.
Like, we just did.
Listen, listen when mice give you advice.
That's true in the real world. So it seems like it's a thing that she can do and just, you know, it ends.
There's no, no ramifications for what's happening for her actions.
Kids, here's a scary lesson.
There's always consequences for your actions.
Ugh, that's what you're going to need therapy later. It's really not funny though, is it?
We do not know how to do a kid's...
That's not my job. I didn't sign up for this.
And we're doing the best we can.
It's a person.
We need to do a coolade drinking game where you take a sip of coolade every time you hear
to say something uncomfortable.
You're so coolade drunk right now. You're so sugarhide, you're making making thinging your thing your thing your thing your that's that's thing your that's that's that's thing that's that's that's that's that's th. I that's thi that's that's thi that's thi that's thi that's thi. I' thi that's thi- thi- that's not that's not that's not that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-a'-sa'-sa'-s'- something uncomfortable. You're so Kool-Aid drunk right now.
You're so sugarhide, you're making your parents' life a nightmare.
So eventually, Coraline gets stuck in the other world.
Yeah.
Basically her other mother gives her this ultimatum that she can either take the button
eyes or what, I guess, die?
Yeah, that's sort of the implication is, yeah. Which is very depressing.
And her mother also says something about breaking a spirit with love.
Yeah.
Which sounds very dugger like to me, you know?
Very quiverful movement.
We should, before she gets stuck, she goes and she sees the other world people's
that have special shows.
What are the burlesque ladies names again? Spink enforceable?
Yeah, they do a burlesque show basically for her
that the entire audience but her and YB,
who in the other world, she's decided that WIB shouldn't talk.
Yeah, he talks too much.
Her other mother has made him so he can't talk and he becomes nightmarish.
Yeah, tot Totally terrifying thing to like set a child's mouth shut.
Right, and then he's just kind of like, he's just gesturing to her, but like who's always trying to smile.
She loves it though, which I find to be a little reprehensible.
But that's what kids want, you know, that's how kids roll.
I don't know. Because in the other world there's no real ramifications to her action so she can make her friend not talk. True. So she goes to this burles show where the audience is her, YB, and a bunch of schnauzers.
I love those schnauzers.
They're so cute.
Earlier, we've seen that the schnauzers, that the, these women have a bunch of pet shnowsers, and when they die, they sewed little wings for them and they're, and their, and put, and put, and put, and their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and their, their, their, and their, their, and their, and their, their, and their, and their, and their, their, their, and their, and a bunch, and a bunch, and a bunch, and a bunch, and a their, I's, I's, I's, I's, I I I's, I I I's, I I I I I their, I I I I I I I their, I I I I I I I I I I's, and a their, and a their, I............ I's, I's, I's, I's, I's. their, I's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thoes. th. toea. th. tooes th. th. thooes thoo-a. thooes thoe. thoes. the sewing wings for one that's not dead yet saying that he's like getting close.
Very distressing.
And the burlesque show is hilarious and very body.
Very body. Very body.
T.G. Huh? Yeah.
There's some stop-motion boobies in this.
Not fully clothed.
But it's boob heavy.
And heavy boobs.
And the mouse circus. And the S and T. And heavy boobs.
And there's the mouse circus, which is phenomenal in this other world.
We're all playing an umpo song and everyone's having a good time.
Anyway, so yes, she gets stuck in the world.
This ultimatum is out there and her other mother has slowly started shifting into something else.
Yeah, she keeps getting like thinner and taller and like bonier and her haircut gets more severe. Yeah, yeah, yeah, more
angular and her other father has become sort of like squishy and squat and
like... Yeah and slow and useless. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Anyway, but he's trying to to help her still. Sort of, yeah. He seems to have some, some, some... Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Sso and th, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th. th th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th, th. Yeah, yeah, yeah, th. Yeah, yeah, yeah, th. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah. Anyway. But he's trying to help her still. Sort of. He seems to have some
some affinity for her. And and she meets these other children who have taken the
can have buttons sewn on your eyes from the lady. So why didn't, why did they die?
Because she said buttons on their eyes?
That I don't know.
So that's not really from reading the book, you don't remember.
It's right up there on the shelf.
I've never read it though, but I have a copy of it.
Yeah, it's like it's very short.
I'm surprised I managed to make a movie that's an hour a, this threat of death. And there's a, there's a, Ybee's grandmother keeps warning him not to go to the house. Oh, right. Because her sister
disappeared there. Yeah. Which it turns out obviously one of the children is a grandmother's sister.
There's a doll. We didn't talk about the doll at all. The doll is like how the other mother watches the children sees what they want and then takes them, basically takes them. Right, right, right, right. Like an escalator, it takes a shoelace.
And the doll looks exactly like Coraline.
Yeah, it's super weird.
Yeah.
And the doll has button eyes.
the tumbun-ah.
this movie reminds me a lot of like a twilight-zonedy, but then it also gets a little bit video gamey where she's like if you can find the other children's eyes, you have to find three of them and once you find
them maybe something will happen and it's like, oh, you gotta go on this quest, you know?
Yeah, but what kid doesn't want to go on a quest?
Everybody likes a quest?
Yeah, so she has to find the eyes and the eyes are hidden hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in hidden in three three three three three three three three three three hidden in three hidden in three hidden in three hidden in three hidden in three hidden in three hidden in three hidden in three hidden in three three three three three that's like, check the three wonders I've created
for you.
Right.
One of which is a garden in the shape of Coraline's face, which I feel even as a child would
have made me uncomfortable.
How gorgeous is that garden though?
It's pretty sweet.
And the praying mantis, like tractor thing?
How cool is that like, thii. Very cool. It's just a beautiful. It's a beautiful movie. Just absolutely beautiful. There's a scene where those some flowers in the garden like start lighting up as she's walking into it.
I'm just like how? How did you do this? You're magicians? How much of it is digital? Any of it or some of it?
I don't really think so. Yeah, I think it's all cool. Do you ever see that documentary about Ray Harry Housen? Do you ever see that documentary that documentary I love stop motion I love Ray Harryhousen we should learn how to do
stop motion animation and do that instead of this podcast what what well we
could make money at that I feel we want you to watch this movie kids and
parents this is absolutely an appropriate movie for adults and she
manages to find them all and they're all in like these interesting fun fun places she has like a little th for th for th for th for th for th for th for th for th for th for th for th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they. they. they. their their their. I their. We' their. We' their their. We' their. We' their. We' their. We' their. We' their. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I. I. And I th. And I th. And I th. And th. And th. And, th. And, th. And, th. I'm to t. I'm te. te. the. I'm. the. the. to to to the. thea. th. th. I'm. th. I'm th all, and they're all in like these interesting, fun places. She has like a little thing that she holds up to her eye that shows her where they are,
that she got from Miss Forcible and Miss Spank.
Yeah, yeah, in the real world.
Yeah, and they're kind of like, we're just like, oh, it's a, it's whatever, just take it.
You know, they movie's over she gets back through the... She throws the cat at the other mother and runs
through the door. Kind of a jerk move. Yeah I mean I think Coraline's a little bit
of a jerk but I think she's supposed to be like because we're all terrible people on the inside, right? Did you know, is that not what you took from it? the the... to, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, like, is, like, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, like, is, is, is, is, is, like, is, like, like, like, like, is, is, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, is, like, is, like, like, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, like, like, like, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, a, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, like, the, like, the, the, mean, I think we're all- No, I mean, it was definitely like,
this, things are about to get real.
I gotta say, like a little self-preservation here.
So she crawls back through the small door
and ends up in her own home.
But her parents are gone.
They're the parents are gone.
Yeah.
I mean, I don't need you to explain it to me.
With snow in it?
Yeah.
It's just because I hate the holidays.
Oh, happy holiday.
Happy holidays.
Oh my god, we're so far from the holidays.
I love it. I'm so glad I'm sweating right now because it means th th th that th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi's thi thi thi. thi's thi's thi's thi's thi thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi the the the the the to the thee to to theee to to to theee to to the to the the. of her parents, much like the ones that she
had of herself.
And what was she throws them into the fire?
Yeah, I was like, how do you know that's not going to kill them?
Exactly.
Corline, like, I know children make impulsive decisions without thinking them through,
but I was like, what if that just killed your parents? And then later you were like, oops, shouldn't that that that that that that that that that that that that that that just that just that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. th. th. And, th. And then, th.. And, th. And, th.. And, th. And, th.. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thoo. th. th. th. thooo. th. that's, tho. th. were like, oops, shouldn't have thrown those dolls in the fire. It's like her parents somewhere like just screaming and melting.
All right, so I think we've gotten through,
and she eventually is able to defeat the other mother.
And there's a happy ending.
She gets the gloves she wanted.
Oh yeah, and her mother and father's garden catalog I guess went well, and so now they
can pay attention to her.
Which kind of felt a little bit like, I don't know if it's sort of the realistic of like, hey,
kids, cut your parents some slack because sometimes they're worried about things and like,
right.
Sometimes they're not going to be great parents, or if it was just like, everything's fine.
I didn't know how to say. Yeah, I think probably the former more than the latter. I hope so. Neil Gaiman is in his apparent himself and
Well, what if Neil Gaiman was your dad seems cool. You probably pretty guff. Not as cool as Robert Dubal being your dad, which is really all I've ever wanted as per this show. Live the dream. So do you want to move on to the ratings phase? Sure. Do you want to go first? I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I th. I th. I the th. I the the the the the the the th. I the the the to to to the to the the to the the the the the the the th. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. that. that. that. that. thoo. tho. tho. their their tho. their their their their their their theirto move on to the ratings phase? Sure. Do you
want to go first? Sure. I really like this movie. Yeah. Yeah. Love stop motion like Neil
Guyman. I really, there's nothing, I have nothing bad to say about this. Yeah. It's a
little long for the story of what the story actually is. So I'm gonna say nine.
Nine. Fun for the whole family. One might say. Yeah.. It the little little little little little little little little the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the story. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to. Yeah. to. to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to. to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah... Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah...... Yeah........................................ Nine. Fun for the whole family. One might say. Yeah.
With a little parental guidance.
I guess.
I guess MMPA.
I would give it a nine, too.
I thought it was beautiful.
The story was great.
I love that, like, sort of like, teaching kids
that the scary stuff in the world isn't as scary as you might think it is. Or the things you wish for are going to come back and haunt you
and everything's going to be terrible.
So it's kind of like, hmm, both of these things are true.
Yeah, there is part of it that could just be like,
just be happy with what you have.
Yeah, I mean, I really think that the Twilight Zone aspect. Or the Twilight Zone, just everything was, be careful what you wish for. Do you remember like, when you were a kid and people being like, be careful what you wish for?
You might just get it and you being like, ugh, Hobbs.
It's what I want.
So I get those new GI Joe action figures, let's do this.
Yeah. That's never the way it works no. Yeah, I think it was great. It was a lot of fun. I'm glad that both Missy and Jason McKitrich suggested this for our kid-friendly episode. Oh, did. It's great.
Thanks guys. Yeah, you guys really nailed it. I think we did this without too many curses.
Yeah, I think there's only one that I have to cut out. Yeah. Speaking of things. thi. Speaking of things of things of things of things of things of thi. Speaking of things of things of things of thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. What? Cryptocuriums! Yeah. Parcel of Terror.
The best monthly subscription box you can buy.
God, it's amazing.
You don't want makeup.
You don't want snacks.
You don't want.
This weird clothes one where people sent you clothes?
You know, I almost signed up for one of those.
And then I looked at the kinds of things people are thi things people thinks people thinks people thin's thin's thin's thi things people thi th do. You need the t-shirts and shorts one.
Yeah.
All of the t-shirts are Simpsons themed though, I don't know why.
Hmm.
Bum, ma'am, meow, meow, meow.
Miam.
Miammia, meow, meow.
But you know it's not Simpsons themed. Cryptocary a parcel of par par par par par. It. It. It. It. It. Yeah. It. Yeah. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. I th. I th. I th. I. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. the the thea. the. the. the. themed, one might say. And if you've listened before you know that Jason does this subscription box set, $35 a month, you get magnets, stickers, plaques, art,
stories, candy, that's my favorite things. The best. And it's all handcrafted, it's all just
beautiful and gorgeous and he puts so much time and effort into it and it really shows
and the stuff that he gives you guys. Yeah, 35 bucks a month.
Yeah, you can afford it.
You can afford it.
And Jason's kids.
So yeah, hey Jason's kids.
Hi Jason's Jason's kids.
I waved to you.
Did you hear that?
I hope that this money is going into your 529 college savings plans that you're going to Cryptocurium.com. It's C-R-Y-P-T-O-C-U-R-I-U-M dot com.
Just go there, sign up. Just get their stuff.
What are you guys doing?
What are you doing?
It's literally even months.
I have seen some people that have tagged that they've purchased his stuff from hearing about it on here.
So do that more. Let him know that his money is keep good. Yeah, that's great. Katie. What?
This is rare.
This has never happened before.
What?
We have a second sponsor.
What?
What?
Are we going to hear about gods?
No.
No. Well, not the typical gods.
Our friend Mike Bukowski runs a thing called Seventh Church Ministries.
I'll just read you a little write-up he gave it, or he says, we are a small-scale publishing house dedicated to bringing the most monstrous horrors of
literature into the glaring light, mostly known for the illustrous obscurum series. We've been
expanding to including new artists and source material. Our books are hand-assembled
and painstakingly designed to meet our aesthetic standards. Our mission is to focus on illustration and the visuals of the horror stories we love
and in doing so, expose you to the monsters
that no longer lurk in the dark.
That's crazy.
It sounds like you're going to join something that's pretty cool.
Yeah, or you're getting sucked into a cult
and Mike is going to come over to your house and anoint you.
Yeah. And then you're in for you're you you you you you you you then you're in you're in you're in you're in then you're in th you're in then you're in for life. Who's going to jump you in too? Because Mike can probably kick your butt. Right? So as Mike says, you can go and look at a bunch of his crud on his page,
Seventh Church Ministries. Wordpress.com. And seventh is spelled out, it's not digit
17th. He's spelled out seven. He especially wanted us to mention that upcoming for, I believe it's June 17th,
will be the release of his next zeme that they're doing for Johanna Ost. She's doing various ghost stories.
That's awesome. Like Victorian ghost stories. His stuff sells up pretty fast,
generally. Yeah, they're living and runs. Yeah. Friday, June 17th at 11 a.
at the the early. If you really want it because otherwise it won't be there. Can I show you some images from the book?
I would like that very much. This is a... This is a... This is nightmare material.
They're really beautiful. What is that I... Oh my god, look at that monster.
No one asked me to sing but I'm doing it anyway. This is from the yellow wallpaper. Oh, it's actually from the king and yellow.
Oh, hmm.
But you've viewed for close.
I recognize the shade.
I love the yellow wallpaper.
But creeping.
Can't wait to someday kill my husband and crawl over his body.
Oh, spoiler alerts.
Oh, spoiler alerts.
Oh, you haven't read the yellow wallpaper to it. But what you should do is order from Seventh Church Ministries.
Get Johanna's Zine when it comes out on June 17th at 11 a.m.
You're gonna love it.
We just looked at the art.
It'll knock your socks off.
Oh yeah, I guess you guys didn't see the art with us, did you?
No, they did not.
Oh yeah, if you go to the seven Ministries.wrest.com and go to the upcoming releases,
it's got some of, or it's got a little picture for the FantasmaGoria by Johanna.
Fantasma Goria.
That is a, was it Doss game?
I don't know.
It was a game that I got.
Yeah.
Wasn't it? I don't
know. I'm gonna Google it. All right so can we do a quick addition of our new segment? Mail bag?
Mailbag. This is a mailbag that came to us via text message from Friend of the show Justin Simba.
Oh, nice. He says, I want you to know, I'm just getting to the predator episode now. And if you th 't mention that John Claude Van Dam was originally the predator for the movie,
I'm showing up to your house to yell at you.
Didn't mention it. Simba, it's a long trip from Nolens to Pittsburgh,
so I look forward to seeing you soon.
Sorry we didn't mention it.
Why don't you hire that before he got to wear the real suit because they had him in this dumb orange suit thing and he said that you can
find pictures online but honestly the person I blame for this is Justin
he should have brought this to us.
Justin Simba? Oh no Justin Gray. Oh yeah.
Justin Gray you're fired. No it's not he's re-hired I just I were hired him. We'reto have to go through human resources for this. So, HR! So if you want to hear your words featured on a future episode of Mailbag, I'm sorry
of.
Mailbag.
There you go.
You can email us at WhereAll Fambulance at Gmail.
Message us on Facebook or like whatever.
Well, you know where to find us.
Yeah, we love you.
I have the bills. It's great. What are we doing next week?
Oh, next week we're doing paranormal activity.
We discussed it in, I think, the previous episode.
And then when I heard that episode, I was like,
oh, maybe Alan didn't want to do that,
and I just completely forced on him.
So...
Kitty, I have a final question to go out on.
Yeah. What little monster chicken is th? Chicker treat.
That's not it is it. The Grim peeper.
That's so much better than chickard treat.
Poughkeepsie.
Thank you so much for listening to this very special episode of where will fambulence. Next week we'll be talking about dirty stuff. Oh, God, no children allowed.
18 and over.
Explicit on iTunes. Thanks guys. Bye. Bye.