Whiskey Ginger with Andrew Santino - Bobby Lee & Black Thought of The Roots Live from Montreal Just For Laughs

Episode Date: August 2, 2019

Santino sits down with Black Thought of the mighty Roots Crew and The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon and Bobby Lee to bridge the worlds of hip hop and comedy and bombing and creating and loving the pr...ocess. Bobby gets racist and gets shown up by an LP while struggling to keep his hands off Black Thought. ALL THINGS CHEETO http://www.andrewsantino.com FOLLOW ME ON INSTA https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ FOLLOW WHISKEY GINGER PODCAST ON INSTA https://instagram.com/whiskeygingerpodcast?igshid=mztm4g3wy0gq FOLLOW BOBBY https://instagram.com/bobbyleelive?igshid=1h8pabp05jajk FOLLOW BLACK THOUGHT https://instagram.com/blackthought?igshid=cdbcy3kp2c2j FOLLOW JARV https://instagram.com/jarvmakesmusic?igshid=8mvdimek7fhx Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:02:00 Enjoy the episode. with Flotto Cabane. Comedy Pro is proud to present this podcast. In here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey. When I'm feeling cheap, I get a bottle of gin and a bean for mixed drinks. But when I'm pretending to be a king, I get some Eagle and Knob Creek and sip this shit and eat, because I'm feeling cheap, I get a bottle of gin, beam for mixed drinks. But when I'm pretending to be a king, I get some Eagle and Knob Creek and sip the shit and eat because I'm a man. Yeah, I'm a classy man. If it's bourbon, I'll have whatever you pass me, fam.
Starting point is 00:02:53 Makers, Mark, Old Crow, Basil, Hayden, Four Roses, Woodford, Bullitt, it's all the same shit. No, it isn't, but I'll still happily have it if you only got some plastic bottle black velvet cap this. Long as Roe Kahn keeps them drums slapping, I'ma keep it sick of Santino catching it with a captain. EGAD, man, this shit is hella dope. I'm leaving them season-need of prosthetics like Chip Delano with colorful shoes and three-inch lifts. My favorite MC's from Prim and his name's Jake Smith.
Starting point is 00:03:19 Quick, Hollywood, make a movie about me. You could even get Byron Callick to play me Except he's too old and I'm too young And I'm hotter than roofing out in the noonday sun So just stop, y'all, call the cops, y'all Let's get it poppin' like a motherfuckin' pop-tart Y'all, shouts to the man with the Cheeto-colored hair It's the Whiskey Ginger Podcast, baby, yeah And it's my pleasure to introduce The host of the Whiskey Ginger Podcast, Mr. Andrew Santino, Bobby Lee, and Black Thaw.
Starting point is 00:03:51 Come on, let's do it. Yeah. Ginger. I like gingers. Ladies and gentlemen, what up, what up, what up, what up, what up, what up, what up? Woo! Bobby. Bobby, don't kiss people.
Starting point is 00:04:15 He's kissing people in the fucking crowd, man. Bobby, don't kiss Char. What the fuck? Oh, my God. This is how we start the show. Bobby likes to kiss people on the mouth. It's European, that's why I do it. I'm in a different country, I like to kiss men in the mouth and everything.
Starting point is 00:04:31 Hi. Alright, hold on. Before we get this thing started, I want to give a warm thank you to Jarb. I made a job to start off the show for Rappid. Jarb is the shit, huh? How great was that? Yes. So cool. And the way I always
Starting point is 00:04:47 start the show, I'm going to start the show how I usually do. These two guests are literally two of my favorite people on earth. I say that for all my guests, but I mean it once again today. Black Thought and Bobby Lee, dude. Holy shit.
Starting point is 00:05:02 I want to be referred to as Yellow Thought. You want to be... So call me Yellow Thought for the rest of the podcast, okay? I'm sorry. But I have thoughts as well. I have a mind. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:05:14 And I have opinions. Thank you. It's all good. You really want to be called Yellow Thought for the rest of the podcast? Yes, yes, I do. So Red Thought, Black Thought, Yellow Thought. Yes. Cool.
Starting point is 00:05:21 Let's do it. Let's do it. Thank you. Okay, good. Thank you guys for coming. Thank you, guys, for coming. Black Thought, I'm so happy that you're fucking here. You're in town doing your own show, right? You're thought. Yes. Cool. Let's do it. Let's do it. Thank you. Okay, good. Thank you guys for coming. Black thought, I'm so happy that you're fucking here. You're in town doing your own show, right? You're doing a show? Absolutely, yeah. Yeah? No, is it you picking stand-ups?
Starting point is 00:05:31 Is that what it is? Yeah, yeah. Essentially me picking stand-ups and doing stand-up. You're doing stand-up too? Yeah, yeah. How much time you got? I mean, I got as much time as I need. I'm probably gonna do, you know, like 10 minutes or something. Yeah, yeah. What a pro answer. I have as much as I fucking need. I'll do whatever the fuck I need. He's a survivor. Yeah like 10 minutes or something. What a pro answer. It's a great answer.
Starting point is 00:05:49 He's a survivor. That's what he is. And the thoughts that he has, number one, are black. That's number one. Number two, he's good at strategy. Black thought strategy. Because I've never beaten a black person in chess. Have you ever played chess? No. I don't know how to play it. because I've never beaten a black person in chess. Do you know that? How many black people do you play?
Starting point is 00:06:05 Have you ever played chess? No. I don't know how to play it, but I never won. So, thank you. Even he knows you definitely can't play chess. I can fucking play chess, bro. Really?
Starting point is 00:06:19 Name some of the pieces. Name any of the pieces. You want to challenge me? I'm doing it right now I'm going to do it for everyone else Here, right? Pawn Right?
Starting point is 00:06:30 Rook Rook Okay Bishop dog in your face, right? Knight King, queen That's all there is And then the little squares
Starting point is 00:06:43 That's not a thing That's not a player That's not a player That's part of the board That's the little squares. That's not a thing. That's not a player. That's not a player. That's part of the board. That's the ground. All right, so you played. You did your thing, yellow. Thank you, black.
Starting point is 00:06:55 This is going to get demonetized immediately on YouTube. So here's what I want to start off asking this, because I'm so interested. Look, you work in the world of comedy, right? You guys are on The Tonight Show, which is fucking unbelievable. I remember when I heard you guys were going to be on The Tonight Show and it blew my mind because it was like the final revolution for me in comedy and music that I love meeting. Because for years, like house bands of late night shows, you were like, okay, it's fucking
Starting point is 00:07:19 a couple of dudes. I mean, even though very talented musicians, but like to have you guys to me me, like led like fucking the pinnacle of legendary hip hop gods to me. I was like, I get to watch that shit and comedy. I mean, I just, to me it was like the bridging of the future. And this is another example because like now you're in the standup game. What made like, was that the impetus? Cause you're like, I want to do it because I'm around it all the time and I'm, um, yeah, it just happened, you know, in a real organic sort of way.
Starting point is 00:07:47 It was like, I'm around the shit really all the time. And even when we're not on tonight's show, just in the roots, we're all a group of comedians. And there's always just an ongoing running joke. So yeah, I thought, why not try and, you know, flex my comedic muscle? I mean, it's not like I don't really write material. I just talk about my life as a joke. Yeah, you and Bobby are the same comedian.
Starting point is 00:08:12 You know? Yeah. His life is also a joke. Yeah, I mean, I just come out and, you know, I just tell some stories. Yeah. Is anybody, who's the funniest member of The Roots? Me.
Starting point is 00:08:25 But who's second to you though? If you're going to be honest, who can put up their competition? Mark, who plays bass in The Roots, he's super funny. Stro, he plays like a drum machine. Everyone in The Roots really is. So you're telling me Quest is not funny at all? Quest is the least funny.
Starting point is 00:08:41 I mean, I'm just being brutal. Why do you think, what makes him the least funny? Because he seems like he, you know, I'm just being brutal. Why do you think, what makes him the least funny? Because he seems like he's comedically aware. He has great timing. One would think,
Starting point is 00:08:50 but, you know, not so much. Not a fact. I'm not going to, you know, I mean, he's all right, but everyone else is just funnier.
Starting point is 00:08:56 Okay. All right. I appreciate that. Did you, when you, like when you guys were starting together in South Philly
Starting point is 00:09:04 in the house, do you want more? the house y'all do you want more? does anybody want more? do you want more? too many whites in here for that I won't talk any of that stuff anymore I just realize 90% of people in here are just like I have no idea what he's talking about no I mean yeah you gotta educate the people yeah they should
Starting point is 00:09:18 who knows the history and the discography of the roots? you do right there this young lady yes you do does anybody in the front know? you don't know these guys? Yeah, okay, you do. Who here has heard rap music before? Okay. A lot of French Canadians.
Starting point is 00:09:32 Yeah, a lot of French Canadians. I don't know if they like... Is there a famous French Canadian rapper? Is there? No? Okay, that makes perfect sense. Yeah, getting my poutine on every day. Yeah, there's nothing there really, no material.
Starting point is 00:09:44 Every day I'm hustling. Every day I will be hustling to the store. No, it's got to go. There's nothing there really. No material. Every day I'm hustling. Every day I will be hustling to the store. No, it's got to go. That's it. It's not going to work. So now that you're doing stand-up,
Starting point is 00:09:52 would you ever do a special? Would that be some shit that you would do? Yeah, yeah. I would do a special. You would? Yeah? If Netflix was like,
Starting point is 00:09:59 we want to do a fucking special. Yeah, for sure. Would you have the group with you or no? No, I don't think I would. I think, you know, I want to just keep a separation of church and state. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:10:09 Yeah. When I'm with The Roots, I feel like it's, you know, we joke a lot amongst ourselves, but what we do as entertainers, as musicians, is serious. Right, right. I don't want to. You don't want to break that down. But then, again, I say it's serious when we're, you know, The Roots, but when we're on The Tonight Show, I'm dressed, I could wear cat ears.
Starting point is 00:10:27 I had cat ears on maybe two, three days ago. Yeah, they make you do some weird shit on that show. There's no doubt. Yeah, they make me do some weird shit. Big time. Bobby. Bobby. I'm here.
Starting point is 00:10:40 I'm here. When he's not, he doesn't, you have to keep him. No, no, you don't. Here's what it is, though. Can I say something? Yeah, say everything. This is what it is. I say that a lot. He said, black thought.
Starting point is 00:10:53 Tariq, one of the things that I wanted to ask you. That's why, though. What? But that's why the fuck I didn't say anything. No, I want you to say something now. I want you to get the information about black thought. Stop touching it. I don't want to interrupt it.
Starting point is 00:11:08 So that's why I'm doing it now. Okay. No, no, no, don't, don't, don't, don't. Don't do that, don't do that, don't do that. What is he doing? Why did they do that? But say what you wanted to say. Why did you do that?
Starting point is 00:11:18 I mean, not they. That's what black people do. Calm down, calm down. I don't know why he did that. That's not what I meant. I said, why are you doing it now? I'm just taking my jacket off. Yeah, that's a great jacket, don't know why I did it. That's not what I meant. I said, why are you doing it now? I'm just taking my jacket off. That's a great jacket, by the way.
Starting point is 00:11:29 I like it. Thank you. You're welcome. Bobby. Yes? Bobby, what's your connection to hip-hop music? I have a lot. Well, go ahead.
Starting point is 00:11:36 Well, I started off in the 80s, right? Here's the thing. I grew up in Green Valley, in Poway, which is a lot of white people. San Diego. San Diego, yes. They don't know what Pow Poway, which is a lot of white people. San Diego. San Diego, yes. They don't know what Poway is, yeah. A lot of white people, you know. Can I touch you?
Starting point is 00:11:49 Is that weird? No, no. Okay, okay. Can I be honest? I think it felt weird for me. No, it's not weird. No, you can't touch me. I can't touch you.
Starting point is 00:11:56 Thank you, no. Okay. And I apologize then. Okay? Black thoughts? Okay, good. This episode will be called Black Thought, Yellow Thought, Go to War, live. Yeah. Listen.
Starting point is 00:12:07 Explain. I don't know where you're... Hip-hop. My brother, Steve, some people know who Stevie Weeby is, right? Yeah, we know Stevie Weeby. He's my brother! Thank you! Shut the fuck up, dude. I'm fucking tired of your shit, dude. When I came up here, you started giving me
Starting point is 00:12:23 fucking fuck-eyes. Don't give me fuck-eyes, alright, bro? I'm not gonna fuck you shit dude When I came up here you started giving me fucking fuck eyes Don't give me fuck eyes alright bro I'm not gonna fuck you I apologize I apologize Have I hooked up with guys before back when I was younger Yes But not anymore so stop giving me fuck eyes Kid What was I talking about hip hop
Starting point is 00:12:39 Sit down don't be so threatening man Canadians they don't deal with that shit up here It's so funny. Usually when people's pants are falling down, they pull them up a little bit. You just gave yours an extra touch. Wait, is my pants down? No, Bobby.
Starting point is 00:12:56 Is it down? Don't. I'll go full force if you want me to. You think I'm fucking around here in Montreal? I am not fucking around in Montreal. I have a fucking around on my trail. I have a statement to make. And my statement is this, okay? You can't bring me down!
Starting point is 00:13:12 Alright? I'm going to fight the oppression. So we'll be right back. And when we come back, maybe we'll get this hip-hop story that we've been waiting for for five fucking minutes. My brother Steve is a hip-hop artist. He's very good at rapping. He has Monk Cheese and a band called hip hop artist. Yes. He's very good at rapping, right? So, yeah, Monk G's in a band called Monk G. Anyway, but I was always like punk rock back in the day.
Starting point is 00:13:32 You know, I got the Sex Pistols album and the Clash and stuff like that growing up. But my brother made me listen to Low End Theory. Yes, Tribe Called Clowns. Great album, right? A lot of De La Soul. Soul. De La Soul. De La Soul was? A lot of De La Soul. Soul? De La Soul. De La Soul was the Asian version of De La Soul.
Starting point is 00:13:49 We are De La Soul. I fucking hate you so much. I don't know why I do things with you. I fucking hate you. I really don't like you. I like you. Finish the story. So anyway, and then obviously the Beastie Boys.
Starting point is 00:14:07 You know, I listened to and run DMC back in the 80s and stuff like that. So that's my, you know, when Jurassic 5 came out with their album years ago, I got that. You like that? I did back then, yeah. They're a good group, yeah. And then that's it, though. I don't know much. In here, we pour whiskey.
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Starting point is 00:15:17 on the grill and is absolutely delicious double cheeseburgers on my patio was the way i like to live baby go ahead and go to butcherbox.com slash whiskey or enter the promo code whiskey to get $20 off your first box and six burgers for free in every box all summer long. Come on, man. What are you doing? Butcherbox.com slash whiskey or just enter the promo code whiskey to get yourself some good meat. In here, we pour whiskey. I've heard of The Roots. I love them. They're phenomenal. I mean, I don't have your album. Look, I know. You keep touching him.
Starting point is 00:15:48 He's said it fucking nine times. You know, I like how you say the album like we have one record. Yeah, we got it. Thank you. Were you kidding that I can't touch you? No, he doesn't like you touching him. But that's not sexual. We've had this conversation many nights. You can't touch you? No, he doesn't like you touching him. But that's not sexual. We've had this conversation many nights.
Starting point is 00:16:07 You can't just touch everybody. Listen, we're trying to connect as human beings, right? New rule. But we're a part of the same species. Right, black thoughts? Raise your hand. We're all the same people. That's basically what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:16:24 We're part of the same family. We're thoughts. Yeah, you're both thoughts. Oh, that's true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, you know, sorry. So you touching me that way is almost incestuous. Yeah, that's your brother.
Starting point is 00:16:36 Yeah, it's incest-style. You're really thinking about it, right? Yeah, it is. Yeah. And let me tell you something. It's usually a penis when you say that, but it's like the arm, that's fine. Yeah. And let me tell you something. It's usually a penis when you say that, but it's like the arm, that's fine. Yeah. I can't wait to get a letter tomorrow morning from his crew being like,
Starting point is 00:16:50 that was the most disrespectful fucked up thing on earth. And you let that little Asian man touch my client. It's all good, man. ICM is going to get sued by CAA from you. One of the reps. Yeah, one of the agents. You don't care. I know you don't care.
Starting point is 00:17:02 I do care. And that's not going to happen. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. What are you talking about? No one's going to get sued. Nothing's going to happen. So I don't know what you're doing. But anyway, I won't touch you,
Starting point is 00:17:11 but I'm going to go this far. I have to do this far, okay? I like you. Congratulations. I know all your success. Thank you. And I want to touch so bad. Don't!
Starting point is 00:17:25 I'm not going to. Robert! I want to touch. bad. Don't! I'm not going. Robert! I want to touch. If I touch, what will happen to me? Aside from getting sickle cell anemia. Is that racist? It is. I apologize.
Starting point is 00:17:35 That was a joke. I'm so sorry. How about this? That was a joke. I'm sorry. How about this? You're going to get SARS. Here's what's funny.
Starting point is 00:17:42 You're discounting the fact. Get this dude out of here. You're discounting the fact that he could physically just beat the shit out of you. I mean, that's just one thing he could just do. I don't think it's safe to assume that I could beat the shit out of him.
Starting point is 00:17:51 It is, very much so. Oh, you can, for sure. There's literally 100% as a guarantee. Yeah, yeah. I don't have any muscles. Ari Shaffir beat the shit out of me. I've had so many people
Starting point is 00:17:59 beat me up. You have. And you know what? When you're a comic and you get beat up all the time, eventually you look in the mirror and you go, maybe it's you. It's you.
Starting point is 00:18:08 It is. You did this. But I don't know. I honestly, I wake up and I go, I don't think I do anything wrong. But maybe I do. You do a lot wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you do a lot wrong.
Starting point is 00:18:21 Like even earlier when we were in the green room and there was a lady in there. Yeah, you said something terrible. I said to Andrew, I go, if I was gay gay you'd be the last dick to suck or something like that Right. You said if we were gay you'd be the last dick I would ever suck Yeah, but how is that if other people listen to it? How is that sexual harass? Cuz that nice woman that works here doesn't we hear about sucking cock when she walks in to give us instructions about the show Check please That woman literally walked in to be like you're right. I'm gonna write the show for you guys and you're like, okay Check, please. No, I don't...
Starting point is 00:18:45 That woman literally walked in and be like, you guys, I'm going to start the show for you guys. And you're like, I wouldn't even suck your cock. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. Yeah, no. Right. She doesn't need that shit. I apologize.
Starting point is 00:18:52 Where is she? She's gone. She went home. Oh, she went home? Okay. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. You know, I have to let you know...
Starting point is 00:18:57 There she is right there. I have to let you know that this guy right here, I know he seems like he's the hero of this. And everyone's like, he's sensible. This guy's a piece of shit. He's one of the worst pieces of shit you'll ever meet in life, okay? So I don't know what, you know, but anyway, I like you, though. Everything's fine.
Starting point is 00:19:16 Go back to black thoughts and then come back to black thoughts. I'm going to. Let me take care of it, okay? Jesus. Can I say a line to you that I fucking love? I mean, I feel like it's going to be weird. No, I swear to God it's not. I swear to God it's not.
Starting point is 00:19:28 Okay. Because I heard it again the other day, and I was like, look, I don't want to fucking kiss the ring more than I want to, but you have such prolific fucking lines that make me go, God damn it, I have to hear it again and again and again and again and again. Benny the Butcher, on the song with him, you said, I had to pull myself up by the bootstrap where people
Starting point is 00:19:50 stay separate like a tooth gap? Yes, I did. Oof. Like, when you write that, do you go, I'm the shit? Well, I mean, you know, I don't know know I thought that was funny the line is actually had to put my own self up by the bootstrap where everybody plays their own part yeah you know yeah play your part like you know
Starting point is 00:20:17 yeah I thought that was cute and funny it's but it's so it's so it's funny but it's so poignant and good right when you when you have moments like that when you are writing because there's a comparison I make in comedy there are times in comedy when we're writing jokes where I'll write something down and you know I want to stand up and you're like god I'm pissed and there's nobody there to celebrate but I'm like it's me bitch
Starting point is 00:20:39 I did it do you have those moments I do sometimes but I surround myself with people who are like, calm down. Right, right, right, right. Who humble you out. Yeah, they keep me super humble. And, you know, when I say, hey, these are the lines or this is the verse that, you know, I just cut or that I'm thinking about recording, you know, that wouldn't be a standout line. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:21:01 But it stood out. Like, oh, you know, whatever. I mean, that's cool. standout line. No, no, no. But it stood out. They would be like, oh, you know, whatever. I mean, that's cool.
Starting point is 00:21:08 It stood out to me because as a comedian, whenever something's kind of funny and clever in hip hop, I always draw to it. Like in that song, Benny has a million great dope lines. Yeah. But for some reason that stuck out because it was so, I just find these little things. Oh, yeah. It's the subtle nuance. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:21 That's what I do it for. Yeah. That's the beauty of what you do. Are you finding the same things when you're trying to write standup? Yeah, I am what I do it for. Yeah, that's the beauty of what you do. Are you finding the same things when you're trying to write stand-up? Yeah, I am. I am. I mean, you know, at best, like when I'm at my best, then I am able to, you know, to touch on those subtle nuances.
Starting point is 00:21:36 Have you bombed yet? Oh, man, you know, is there like wood to not go on? No. No, I've yet to bomb. Okay. I kind of want it to happen to you really bad. I don't. Just because you're one of my favorite hip-hop artists,
Starting point is 00:21:50 so badly, I want to have that on you. I bombed as a rapper. What was the worst bomb moment for you playing music? Oh, man, you know what? We were doing, some years ago, we were doing an awards show. It was a tribute to all these different artists that were being honored. And I was one of the artists chosen to honor Jay-Z.
Starting point is 00:22:12 Do you guys know Jay-Z? Do you guys have him up here? And Jay-Z had recently signed us to a record that he had just signed, The Roots. So, you know, we had like a new relationship with him. We were doing business together. And, yeah, like I had to do this tribute. We came to rehearsal earlier in the day, and I just wasn't familiar with the material
Starting point is 00:22:32 that we were doing. It was me. It was another rapper, Talib Kweli. And it was some singers. And we were all like a team in tribute. And we had all of the lyrics on teleprompters. And they were all over the stage. So I didn't need to commit any of it to memory.
Starting point is 00:22:50 And then cut to on the day, when it was time to come out and do the show, all the teleprompters went blank. And the band was still playing, and they're rocking on. And usually, Questlove is able to feed me the first line or two or say something that's going to remind me, jog my memory of what I have to say. And he's like yelling, busy yelling. But on this day in particular, he was playing inside of a plexiglass drum.
Starting point is 00:23:17 CHRIS HAYES, Oh, right. One of those casings. Yeah. CHRIS HAYES, It was like a sound barrier. So I couldn't hear anything. He was like,. He knows the songs. And he's like rapping the lyrics. And I just couldn't get it. And I asked Kweli knows the songs. And he's like, you know, rapping the lyrics.
Starting point is 00:23:25 And I just couldn't get it. And I asked Kweli. I said, yo, like, what's my line? And he's like, I'm trying to remember my shit. Get out of here. I was just like, ah. And I just bombed. And it was, I wound up, for the whole performance, just like ad-libbing.
Starting point is 00:23:36 And you know. Damn. I mean. Were you feeling it while it was happening? Because when we bomb as comics. It was an out of body experience. Yes. You leave yourself.
Starting point is 00:23:44 Yeah. I felt like I was in the audience watching myself. And you watch yourself and you're like, who is this garbage-ass dude doing my shit? Yeah, I was like, oh, man, dude is trash. And just, you know, everyone... I don't know, I'm sure in my mind it played out a lot worse than it did. I'm sure, but it was.
Starting point is 00:23:58 Yeah, it felt really terrible. What's your worst bomb, Bobby? Excuse me? What? When was your worst bomb? Sometimes you have to snap him back in. That's an Asian. She's laughing.
Starting point is 00:24:18 Where are the Asians laughing? Raise your hand if you're an Asian and laughed at that. And the De La Soul joke. My worst bomb was... I've had many bombs, but the worst one I ever had was when I got booed off a stage in front of 20,000 people in San Jose. What? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:33 Yeah. So I did this show with a guy named Dave Chappelle and Kat. Kat Williams? Yeah. So both brand new artists to stand up. Yes. Both of my first. Right, okay.
Starting point is 00:24:46 And I did a show with them, and who else was on it? Leslie Jones was on it. Okay. So it was 20,000 seats. Leslie went up before me. I was looking at the monitor, and she, in front of 20,000, she jumps off the stage, and there was like a little, like, 14-year-old white kid sitting there, and she's just such triumphing.
Starting point is 00:25:04 The place. Okay, I'm standing behind a wall. And it's doing this. Because the laughter is so loud. Walls are shaking. Yeah, like this, right? She's killing me. And I look at Jeff Wills, the promoter.
Starting point is 00:25:15 I go, I don't think I can do it. He's like, you're going to be fine. I'm going to eat it. And then she gets up. She's sweating, right? She's like, you're going to kill it, Bob. Right? Yeah. And so there's this long hallway. And there she gets up, she's sweating, right? She's like, you're gonna kill it, Bob, right? Yeah. And so there's this long hallway, and there's a smoke
Starting point is 00:25:28 machine, and all of us in here hear, Bobby Lee! Right? So then Seriously, I start running down this hallway, and it's like nine miles long! And I go through the smoke, and everyone's, ah, right? I go, how you doing, San Jose? Nothing. right?
Starting point is 00:25:46 And then two minutes in, I black out. No, I'm being real. And I end up in, like, a medical room. What? In the back of the stage at the facility. Did you collapse? No, apparently I had, like, I was bombing so bad that I started doing gibberish.
Starting point is 00:26:03 Shut up. Yeah, so I'm eating, and people are throwing stuff, that I started doing gibberish. Shut up. Yeah, so I'm eating and people are throwing stuff so I started going like I didn't know what my body was like do something. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:13 Right? So I'm sitting there and Jeff Wills my agent was there Matt Blake I don't know if he's here now but he's in town but I go, what happened?
Starting point is 00:26:23 And they go, we've never in the history of comedy ever seen a fail on that level before. You got medical attention? Yeah, because they thought I had snapped my mind, you know what I mean? And I went into a different
Starting point is 00:26:36 you know what I mean? That everything broke. I turned into Two-Face or whatever. I had an alter ego that I was going to turn into and that's what happened. But anyway, I get that. But here's the biggest fear is that night. Because you bomb, and you try to justify it by going, you're a human being. It happens.
Starting point is 00:26:53 Things happen. And just persevere. But that's not, I was in the bed like this, in my hotel room. First thought is, I'm never going to get pussy again. That's the first thing, right? I'm going to have no money, right? And then the third thing is, I can't do this anymore.
Starting point is 00:27:11 That hurt so bad. No pussy? But then the next, I had to do it again. In the same venue? Yeah, but then what I did was I switched the lineup. I followed somebody. I'm not going to say who because he's very good, but it's somebody that I know I could follow.
Starting point is 00:27:25 Ken Jeong? No. That's good. Give him a round of applause. That was a very funny joke. Very good. And the timing was good. He's a professional.
Starting point is 00:27:39 Thank you. And I like your legs, sir. They're really nice. Hey, Baba. Yeah, I never bom legs, sir. They're really nice. Hey, Bob, Bob. Yeah, I never bombed like that. That is a new level shit. That's new level shit. I had to do the worst I ever did.
Starting point is 00:27:53 I think I've talked about this before, but the worst I ever did was Joel McHale, Alonzo Bowden, myself, and a guy named Gary Veeder, who's a comic from New York, who's phenomenal. We got paid way too much money to go to Las Vegas to perform for Jim Beam Whiskey, but they got bought out by Suntory, which is a Japanese company. Do you know that?
Starting point is 00:28:10 Does anybody know that? Okay. We didn't fucking know that shit. So we go there, and I'm thinking, I can't. I was like, whiskey dudes? I'm going to have the most fucking fun with these dudes. These are going to be like good old boys laughing, chugging, talking about tits and partying. Oh, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:28:25 I walked in an auditorium with circular dinner tables not facing us. Half of these little Japanese men not facing us. Almost no one in there spoke English. So get a bunch of comics from the United States
Starting point is 00:28:42 to come kill it in Vegas for little tiny Japanese businessmen in suits eating steak. Okay, some of them are big, too. You say little every time. Not all of them are little. What's the biggest Japanese guy? They're not fraggles.
Starting point is 00:28:55 They're little tiny men. Not sumo, not sumo. No, but sumo's different. They're not, I think they're imported sumos. I don't believe they came from Japan. Oh, God, that's crazy. Maybe you're right, but my point is this. I don't know if they from Japan. Oh, God, that's crazy. Maybe you're right. I don't know if they grow them.
Starting point is 00:29:06 Maybe you're right, but when I say this, it's that. Not every, just stop saying little because it demeans the Japanese people. Time out, time out, time out. What? I'm not saying they're little to demean their culture. I'm saying they are actually physically tiny men. Yeah, but compared to you, maybe. That's right, a normal-sized man.
Starting point is 00:29:22 Oh, that's true. I'm sorry. They were all eating fucking dinner at these tables, not normal-sized man. Oh, that's true. I'm sorry. They were all eating fucking dinner at these tables, not paying attention to us, and Joel McHale went out and worked so fucking hard on getting a couple of, like, laughs, and his face, when he walked back, I was like, how is it? And he was like, just go get the check, okay? Really?
Starting point is 00:29:43 Yeah, go get the check. Oh, my God, if he says it, it's real. He was like, just go get the check, okay? And I Yeah, go get the check. Oh, my God. If he says it, it's real. He was like, just go get the check, okay? And I knew what that meant. And I was like, you know what, Joel McHale? I'm going to fucking murder this room. I'm going to light this. They're going to put down their steak knives.
Starting point is 00:29:56 They're going to fucking turn around. I'm going to get a little tiny Japanese ovation from their little tiny hands. Hundreds of little Japanese men clapping their little tiny hands. Yay, yay, yay, yay, yay, yay, yay, yay. And by you laughing, you encourage this kind of behavior.
Starting point is 00:30:16 FYI. It's on you. So I told one joke and ate shit so bad that I could hear a man steak knife cut the fucking plate.
Starting point is 00:30:29 I heard it go through the steak in the back of the room. And I was like, fuck, let's just barrel through this. I got 11 minutes to go. Look down at the clock. One minute has gone by. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:30:43 Yeah, I have to do this for 10 more fucking minutes. I'm like, okay, okay. I throw out all these jokes, nothing, nothing, nothing, nothing. This is the funniest part. We had to stay clean. They were like, please stay clean.
Starting point is 00:30:55 They don't, it's disrespectful to say fuck or anything like that. So I did. I did the right thing because I wanted the check. It was a big fucking check. So I wanted the check. And Alonzo Bowden,
Starting point is 00:31:04 I don't know, do you know Alonzo? Yeah, Zo. He's the best. Alonzo Bowden was like, man, fuck this shit. Bro, I get off stage, he can tell I'm in pain. I mean, it was like,
Starting point is 00:31:15 he was patting my... Your tears. Almost. Almost. He's patting my shoulder, like consoling me. He has a big hand too. Huge.
Starting point is 00:31:23 Opposite of the crowd. And that's not... I know that came out rock-cross weird. He has unusually big hands. He's a big hand too. Huge. Opposite of the crowd. And that's not, I know that came out rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:26 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:27 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:27 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:28 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:29 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:29 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:29 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:31 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:32 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:36 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock,
Starting point is 00:31:36 rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, rock, fuck this shit and he goes out and he didn't want to play their bullshit game and he goes y'all ain't never seen a black motherfucker this big before and everybody turned and he was like yeah now i got your attention and he lit the room on fire wow they loved them i mean it was like all it took was someone being honest with them instead of playing this weird coy game and i'm sitting there learning lessons from him watching him fucking kill and then afterwards the promoter goes right up,
Starting point is 00:32:05 gives him a big hug. And everyone's laughing, and they're smiling. And I'm standing there, and I'm like, hey. Hey, you know? Hey. And I said, man, this is great, man. I want to thank you so much. To the promoter, I said, I want to thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:32:19 I would love to do these again. And he goes, well, you know, we'll talk. We'll talk. I never done a corporate gig ever again after that. Literally, that guy, that buried me because of that. So the lesson here is
Starting point is 00:32:30 if you're bombing bad, make a good black joke and it will work. Because he killed, man. He fucked up. Yeah, I don't do corporates or college gigs. They're just too nightmarish.
Starting point is 00:32:39 What is your, like what's the world in the music world when you guys get offered like a private corporate gig? Yeah. Do you like that shit? Do you hate that shit?
Starting point is 00:32:48 I love it. You do? I love to do a corporate gig because people, they're always drunk as fuck. And just sort of just starved for entertainment. They're just ready to give it up for whoever the entertainment is. But they show you the respect. And we come and we kill it. It's like a party.
Starting point is 00:33:07 Do they want you to hang out afterward and shit? I mean, in a perfect world, but I just graciously decline. How do you guys exit? Do you guys all have jetpacks when you're done? Do you take off on jetpacks? Pretty much. The Roots, gone.
Starting point is 00:33:21 We throw a bunch of smoke bombs down. But even if the Roots bomb, right? They bomb together. Yeah, we throw a bunch of smoke bombs down, and it's gone. But even if the roots bomb, right, they bomb together. Yes. When you're by yourself, and you can share that experience only to yourself, it's horrifying. That's why I want you to... No, like, the roots, we've never, I don't know that we've bombed together. Maybe earlier on, we had, like, one or two bad gigs. But yeah, like, when you bomb, in the roots, it's usually just, like, you.
Starting point is 00:33:44 Yeah. You just didn't do well on whatever instrument you play. So you feel it. And do they say anything backstage? Is anybody like, hey, man, you were shit. That was shit. Yeah, what was up with that? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:56 And so they gang up on one person. Like the whole group gangs up on one dude? Yeah, sometimes. Sorry to interrupt, but I have OCD. What is that purple thing right there with the spray? Oh, man, this is, I wish I could make up something cool for it to be. Can I spray some on my body, or is that yours? It's like
Starting point is 00:34:12 a mint mouth thing. No, no, no, no, wait. Don't give him that. Don't give him that. It's organic hand sanitizer. Do you have any more of that? You put it in your hands. You put your hands in your mouth. It's mouth stuff. It's mouth.
Starting point is 00:34:26 It's breath freshener. It's his hand thought. How about I couldn't think of breath freshener fast enough. I said, it's mint mouth thing. You're weirdo, man. Look at that. You made that guy leave. That's how much he man. Look at that. You made that guy leave. That's how much he was...
Starting point is 00:34:47 You made that guy leave. Bobby, don't push people. Bobby. He's just kidding. He's just kidding. He's joking around. It's all... Well, you killed a guy
Starting point is 00:34:58 in the audience. I'm suing you tonight. See? See? Why is that man leaving? That was very strange. That was really weird. Really weird.
Starting point is 00:35:09 It's a very short... He doesn't look laughing. You gonna chase him with Red Bull? So bad. Yeah. I knew what it was, but I did it for comedy, but then I regret it now.
Starting point is 00:35:20 That's not good. How much stuff have you done for comedy that you regretted? Oh my God. so many things. I can't even, there's a list of 10,000. Like I was at the Tempe Improv, like I'm back in the Tempe Improv, but I was banned from that room for 20 years.
Starting point is 00:35:34 Do you know why? Because when I was young and I opened for Carlos Mencia there, I was on stage, I was bombing, and I pulled my pants down, and there was a candles back then they had on the table. Yeah, real candles. And I took the candle, I just jammed it in my butthole.
Starting point is 00:35:48 And the owner of the club is a Christian, right? They're all Christians? Yeah. And they're like, um, that's not comedy. They left, they left. Yeah, but, you know, it's not, you know, that's not what our club is about. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:03 The improv brand. Yeah. So then 20 years, I couldn't play that room for one candle in your ass I don't can't one candle in your ass It seems like such a simple a room and then you know how I got back in how the guy died It was tragic, but he you kill, you know, and that's sad. It's really sad. No, the guy died. No, listen.
Starting point is 00:36:29 Bobby. It's sad. Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait a minute. You're saying he shot himself, he hung himself, he cut himself open?
Starting point is 00:36:40 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he's like a Terminator kind of a guy. But so he died. Very bad. And then my friend, this is what's like a Terminator kind of a guy. So he died and then my friend, this is what you do if you're banned from a club, just have your friend,
Starting point is 00:36:50 when the guy dies, have your friend buy it. So my friend Joel bought it. Yeah. I'm back here. See, and you guys are celebrating
Starting point is 00:37:04 that behavior, which I totally disagree with and that's so fucked up. Why, why, why? No, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine. Because ever since we've known each other, you've done things that you know are crossing the line for comedy. You know what sucks about my reputation is that I'll do a new club, or I'll be on a, what did you say?
Starting point is 00:37:21 You created it for yourself. Yeah, I already said that earlier, though. Yeah, you did it, it's your fault. Go ahead. Okay, don't bring it back up, okay? It's fine. It's your fault. Go ahead. I already know. It's all your fault. Go ahead. Anyway, I'll show up at a shoot or something,
Starting point is 00:37:36 and a director or a club owner will go, wow, you're unlike what I had heard. And I go, what'd you hear? We just thought that you were going to jam things in your butthole and run around. You know what I mean? I'm an American citizen. I know how to function in society. But as a performer...
Starting point is 00:37:53 Where's she going? Where you going? I'm real tired of this walking out stuff. Everybody boo. One, two, three. Boo! This guy's back, though. Let's say one, two, three, yay! One, two, three, yay! One, two, three, yay. Welcome him back.
Starting point is 00:38:06 There's this guy. Welcome back. Very good. Look, he took a shit. Look at his smile. Yeah. He feels relaxed. Hurry up and sit the fuck down.
Starting point is 00:38:13 Let's go. Hurry up. Yeah, yeah, hurry up. It's not about you. But what was I saying? Oh, yeah, so, yeah. Talking about the brand that you built. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:20 You built the brand. You built yourself. But, you know, in the last five years or six years, I've been pretty good, though. Yeah, you've been keeping it together. I've been keeping it together. I show up to places. And, like, this festival was a place where I had never been before. Yeah, you'd never been here.
Starting point is 00:38:34 I'd never been here before. Black thought. Why would you do that, black thought? I don't know. Because it was just a black thought. It was just a Black Thought. It was an honest Black Thought. I felt like you were being too real. He likes it when you're fucked up.
Starting point is 00:38:51 I love the relationships and Blacks and Koreans. Can I just talk about it for a second? Yeah, we have and we should. Is that back in the riots? We had a rough time. Yeah, it was a rough time. The looting, you know what I mean? The shooting. Yeah, it was a rough patch. The looting, you know what I mean? Keep this in mind.
Starting point is 00:39:05 The shooting. The shooting, yeah. That's my bad. That was you guys. And then it's like, but you know, if you touch it, you have to buy it. When you're in the bookstore. Just to let you know. I know.
Starting point is 00:39:14 I just want to let you know, Black Thought, no browsing. Okay? Do you know what? This is not a museum, right? You know what's so fucked up? Buy it or not. You know what I mean? You know what's so fucked up about this?
Starting point is 00:39:21 When he came into the green room, Bobby followed him around. No, I didn't. No, I didn't. Yes, you did. Oh. Yes, you did. You did. You kind of did.
Starting point is 00:39:33 I did kind of do it, but that's just the... He came in. He came in. I said, what's up? It's so good to have you. And Bobby poked his head around the corner. Yeah, yeah. And he was like, who's with him?
Starting point is 00:39:43 Who's with him? No, I didn't. I didn't say it like that. You said, who's with him? Who's with him? No, I didn't. I didn't say it like that. You said, who's with him? Who's with him? Oh, yeah, I did it like that. And he had a bag in his hand and he goes,
Starting point is 00:39:48 what's in the bag? What's in the bag? What's in the bag? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I did do that. But then, so after the ride, it got a little weird,
Starting point is 00:39:54 but then, guess what helped us? Rush hour. Yeah. Rush hour. Yeah. After rush hour, then you could go to
Starting point is 00:40:01 like a Korean spa and then you would see black people again there. Yeah. In my head, I was like, oh, it's working. So Chris Tucker bridged the gap, you think. It was all him? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:09 And now it's just a love fest, is it not? I mean, I wouldn't say love fest. No. Like fest. It's a like fest. It's a like fest. It's a get along fest more than anything. It's a get along fest, yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:20 It's a get along fest. You know, it's great. The internet and everything, we're all one now. What do you think? You have no respect for that microphone. I know. I know. I know.
Starting point is 00:40:41 When you guys, when you guys, when you're on the road, are you really particular about your equipment like that? Like, do you have to have a special mic? Are you weird about that? Yeah, yeah. I'm weird about it. I have my mic. Your mic, and it travels with you? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:50 Why don't comics do that? I'm always fascinated. Why don't we have our microphone? I know, because the other night I was on the mic. Yeah, I know what you do to the mic. And I coughed. Yeah. And there was a chunk of red something.
Starting point is 00:41:02 And it was like a beet, but it wasn't beets, because I hadn't even had beets in a year. It was blood. And I was like, that's my time! And he hit it like that. And I saw it, and I go, Bonnie McFarlane's about to go out. I'm going to leave it. So I left it in there, and I could see her.
Starting point is 00:41:23 I was laughing so loud, because I could see her I was laughing so loud Because I could see her going Hey everybody And she looked right at me Right And she went like that Like that So you travel Yeah we should travel
Starting point is 00:41:31 Every time I see Every time I Comics In a lot of comics Like some of the Shittier comics Will do A lot of bad bits
Starting point is 00:41:39 With the mic Like lick it And chew on it And put it in In their body cavities And they'll do Cheap stuff With the microphone, don't they? Oh yeah. Yeah, don't you?
Starting point is 00:41:47 I used to... You used to fucking swallow it. Suck it like a dick, right? But then every time I go home, I get a sore throat. Why do you think that is? Well, through research, googling it, it's because there's bacteria. Bacteria, yeah. That's probably what's on there
Starting point is 00:42:04 that's in your throat. But then you would do it all the time. I don't do it anymore. You don't. Bacteria, yeah. That's probably what's on there that's in your throat. That's why I don't do it. But then you would do it all the time. I don't do it anymore. You don't do it anymore. You learn. Every time I did, I got sick. You live, you learn. He did it all the time trying to build up a resistance. Yeah. That's what it was, yes. You know how like in Game of Thrones, right? Right? Someone will have a poison
Starting point is 00:42:19 in their mouth or something and they're so used to the poison, they kiss and they kill the other person. they don't die. Right, they build an immunity. I don't remember where I saw that. I'm so sorry. But the odd thing is that the thing that you must learn about Bobby right now
Starting point is 00:42:32 is that Bobby doesn't really have much of an immune system because he sleeps for, I don't know, 19 hours a day? When did I call you today and I asked where you were? 4.42. In bed.
Starting point is 00:42:47 Yeah, you're in bed. Do you know why? 4.42 in the... I didn't have to be here until 5.15. That's right. So what am I going to do? What time did you go to bed last night? I don't know, 4 in the morning?
Starting point is 00:42:57 You did not. 5. You did? Yeah. What were you doing up all night? You weren't at shows. Well, I mean, okay. Let's say you went to bed at, you know,
Starting point is 00:43:07 4.35 in the morning still. I mean, that's a long-ass time. I know, because I get depressed. And also, you know, I've been in Montreal for longer than you have, and I've been masturbating every night. And what's happening now is that I can't sleep if I don't masturbate.
Starting point is 00:43:23 And last night, I was looking at all kinds of weird porn, right? I'm sorry. What's weird porn, dude? And my penis wouldn't get hard, so I would take my two fingers like this. Yeah. And I'd squeeze. Let's say this is the head. I'd squeeze this part.
Starting point is 00:43:38 Yeah. It gets some sort of blood flowing into it. Yeah. And then I just started doing this like this. Yeah. Yeah. And then, like, you know how you masturbate a lot and you don't really get that big of a feeling
Starting point is 00:43:47 because you've just been doing it for long. So when I came, it was just like, I went, oh. I mean, that's it. And then now you have like a little like, your wet fingers with cream. What is it? We've talked about this before. What sound does it make when you cum?
Starting point is 00:44:03 Bloop. Because it's only one tear. What is it? We've talked about this before. What sound does it make when you cum? Boop. Because it's only one tear. You're laughing now, but I'm going to say that. I've talked to doctors about it. My one tear has just as many as your big load. You cum gangster tears? Gangster tears. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:21 Like I murdered somebody. I would just like to think when you cum, like a gong gets hit. For some reason, I would love that so much. At the moment... You know, I try not to laugh.
Starting point is 00:44:34 That was very good. That was good racial shit. I love it. When you guys... When you're traveling with the group on the road, when you... Like, most guys
Starting point is 00:44:42 have families now, right? Most are families? Yeah, yeah. When you travel on the road when on the road, when you, like, most guys have families now, right? Most are families? Yeah, yeah. When you travel on the road, when everybody was single, what was the rules of the road with that kind of shit? You know, like, with comics, like, comics travel in time. With masturbating? What do you mean? Well, fucking anything.
Starting point is 00:44:54 Like, groupies, anybody. Like, what were the rules of, like, because you had to share a space, didn't you, when you first started out? So what's the rules of that? You know, like, the sock on the door, like, don't come in. I have a girl. Or come on in. She's down. I mean, yeah. Yeah, there were no rules. No rules. You didn't the door like don't come in i have a girl or come on in she's down i mean yeah there yeah there were no rules no rule you didn't have like a pact between
Starting point is 00:45:09 you like listen here's i'm particular about this when i bring someone back it was just free for all um yeah you know i mean i guess i want to live back then so bad yeah i mean we it was it was the 90s yeah yeah there was a code of honor in comedy where that was in play, but now there's no more code. What do you mean? Because I've gone up. I'm not going to name names because I can get into very big trouble. But there's a bunch of big comic guys that are single. Is this about Ken Jeong again?
Starting point is 00:45:36 What? Is this about Ken Jeong again? No, no. Yeah, let's just say Ken Jeong. No. Not Ken Jeong. No. That guy doesn't fuck, bro.
Starting point is 00:45:45 You don't fuck, dude, that guy. My point is this, is that, and I would go up to guys that get a lot of girls and go, listen, you know what I mean? You stay with the sevens and the tens, through the tens. They're yours. We get the fours. I mean, me, you know,
Starting point is 00:46:00 what's that Indian guy from Canada? Russell. Russell Peters? That guy, yeah, yeah. Guys like him, right? So you're saying you guys would get the fours? Yeah, but just... If you're a good-looking male comic who gets women, stay with the nines and tens,
Starting point is 00:46:15 but don't dip down and get threes. Right. Because then little midgets like Brad Williams can't get any girls, you know what I mean? Little people, sorry. Little people. He. Little people. He's a human being. I think I should go.
Starting point is 00:46:31 I think that's it. I should go. You're not going to go? Yeah, okay. Did you just apologize? I'm so sorry. That's fine. Any dwarves or little people in the room?
Starting point is 00:46:40 Oh, boy. There it is. There is? Oh, there you are. You are there. I'm so sorry. That was my... Oh, my God. is. There is? Oh, there you are. You are there. I'm so sorry. That was my, oh my God. What are the odds?
Starting point is 00:46:53 Literally, because I was looking at the audience, right? I was looking at the audience. I was like, you can say it because they're not here, right? But then I realized that he is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come up, come up. Oh my God. This is terrible. It's terrible. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come up, come up. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:47:05 This is terrible. It's terrible. Oh, what a terrible day. Yeah, I know you, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, how are you? Sit down. Please sit down.
Starting point is 00:47:17 Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Dude, you couldn't hear him? What the fuck? What's going on, guys? Bobby, come here. Happy people. Bobby, come here.
Starting point is 00:47:30 Hi. Yeah, all right. What he just said, did that offend you? I actually got, I get it all the time, you know, I'm five foot and a half, according to my family doctor. That's some real shit. But when I wear shoes, I'm actually five, too. So a lot of psychology. I'm into psychology.. But when I wear shoes, I'm actually 5'2". So, uh...
Starting point is 00:47:45 A lot of psychology. I'm into psychology. You know what I mean? Yeah. So... Man, you guys do think and talk different. That's for sure. There's nothing about that. And, uh, in psychology, I'm not sure if you guys are aware of the marshmallow experiment, but it's when a marshmallow you guys are aware of the marshmallow experiment,
Starting point is 00:48:08 but it's when a marshmallow gets placed in front of a kid, and if he could withstand the temptation, you know, if he could last one minute... Okay, Mike, all right. His friend, I go, he's not really, right? He's like, not really. He's just a small guy. Hey. You hear me? Fuck you! No, no, no, no. Fuck you!
Starting point is 00:48:30 Be nice, Bobby. Be nice. Oh, that just fucking fucked me up right there. What's your name? He's like, I'm one, and he's not! Huh? Say his name. What's his name? Hi, Jared. Jared, thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:48:45 Thank you for being a good sport. Are you a comic? Say his name What's his name? Jared Drew Hi Jared Jared thank you so much You're a stand up right? Thank you for being a good sport Did you stand up Jared? Thank you for being a good sport Are you a comic? Yeah I just done Yeah cause I've seen you around Let's melt it Alright
Starting point is 00:48:52 This guy's killing I know This guy's killing I know I know Don't go Sit there back down He is I'm a fucking nightmare
Starting point is 00:49:02 This shit This whole thing's a nightmare. Okay. I've lost total control of the show at this point. This is the wild west. Here's what we want to do. Because I know there's some... I'm glad that you guys all came out.
Starting point is 00:49:16 I think this is fucking incredible. This is the first time I've ever done the show live. Great, great, great, great. Awesome. We do appreciate the fans, and so I want to give a couple of opportunities for people to ask some questions. They have to be fucking real.
Starting point is 00:49:31 Don't be an asshole and take up time, because if you get an annoying, dumb, I think I'm funny question, we're going to fucking shut it down. So if you want to ask something fun and cool and curious, please raise your hand like a grown man and ask. Do we have a mic? We have a... Okay, great.
Starting point is 00:49:45 Thank you so much. This gentleman right... This guy right here in the very front. Say your name and... Hello, Jack. Jack. When are we getting red and yellow? Ah, Jack wants to know. So Jack is curious to know when Bobby and I are going to do our podcast together. That's weird because are we not here together now?
Starting point is 00:50:04 We are right now. We're doing it now, fucker. Well, Bobby, you've got the new studio at your new place. Yeah, so here's the deal. How do you know about his new house? A little creepy, right? He has my face on his shirt. Oh, he is wearing your shirt.
Starting point is 00:50:19 Okay, that's great. Yeah, very... I have fans, fucknut. And he came to the other one, right? I did a podcast here with who? Not as many people here yesterday. But who was it? I forget.
Starting point is 00:50:31 The 500. That's right. So this had way more people than the other podcast that he did? Oh, way more. That's right. Dude, this is insane. When I walked over here,
Starting point is 00:50:41 I was like, they're here for Red? But they are. I mean, no, really, it's probably me. For black. Yeah, more than anything in the world. You've touched him so many fucking times now. I know. I wish we had a meter up there. I've got my shit.
Starting point is 00:50:53 It's absurd. So you're from where? Australia. Australia. Okay, great. Here's the deal. I got the okay from my girlfriend to do one with him, but my only problem is the fat black guy. Nobody cares. I know, but the fat it together. To do one with him. Yeah. But my only problem is the fat black guy. Nobody cares. I know,
Starting point is 00:51:06 but the fat black guy wants to do one with me too. And I said before I'd get Tiger Belly that I was going to do one with him. But it never turned out I fucked him over. And now if I do one with you,
Starting point is 00:51:16 fat black's going to get really upset. So let me just take a quick poll. Eric Griffin, by the way, I call him fat black. Yeah, he's like my Eric Griffin. I don't care what you think because he's fat and he's black. How many people here
Starting point is 00:51:24 want us to do that podcast together? So, alright. The people have spoken. Yeah. So, okay. Let's get another question. Who has a nice question? This gentleman right behind. What's up, dude? Hey, I'm Josh. Hey, Josh.
Starting point is 00:51:40 When are you going to do a special, Bobby? Yeah, when are you going to do a special? You know, the honest truth is this. Is that... You have to get up every time you talk like a dictator or something. What is that about me? I don't know. It's like a power thing. Here's the deal, okay?
Starting point is 00:51:58 You know, as a comic, you want to feel that you're wanted. Right? I think everyone wants more. Yes, they do. I want to feel like I'm wanted. I want to feel like companies want to do with me. And I'm not having any excitement with any companies that want to do one with me.
Starting point is 00:52:14 And I don't want to ask and beg, because I feel like I've been around for so long. I've done so many things, more than most, right? And yet I feel like nobody wants to be in business, so I was gonna wait until some company was like, we really want to do one with you, we're big fans, and we think it's gonna be a hit. If you don't get that, and you're like,
Starting point is 00:52:34 you try to convince people that you're relevant and that you can do it, it feels gross. Yeah. And like this festival, it's like, this is my first time ever in Montreal. And the reason why is because it got to the point where I felt like they really wanted me. Yes. And you want to feel loved.
Starting point is 00:52:52 Yeah. That's what it is. It's not that I don't have the ability or the material. I do. But I'm not going to beg, friend. There you go. I want to be offered with money. So this is a great question because we've talked about this before.
Starting point is 00:53:09 Bobby Knight. I'd be so upset. That was a good question. I love it. But it's a real thing. It's a real thing that this is something that I genuinely wanted to ask you, too. It's like, what is the pressure to do another album? Because for us, there is this weird, what do the fans want versus what we want to distribute?
Starting point is 00:53:24 Do you still feel pressure to make another fucking album? Or are you like, that's not even on the agenda? I feel a little pressure to make another Roots album. Right. Yeah, because it's what the people sort of want. But do you want it? I do want it, but not as much as I want to do just anything that's different from that. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:53:46 I feel like I want to just be creative in different ways. But, yeah, there's something to be said about what putting out new material under the Roots brand affords us as a band. You know what I mean? Endorsements and tours and all sorts of, you know, everything that sort of comes along with putting out new music is what I think those members of The Roots who don't do anything
Starting point is 00:54:10 but put out Roots albums are sort of more concerned with. This is a powerful thing that Bobby was saying. I know we make jokes a lot, but what is truthful is Bobby is one of the most respected comedians in the game by far. One of my personal favorites both because we're so close and both because I really love his comedy.
Starting point is 00:54:28 It's the same way that I feel like with your music. It's like the fans and the people do want this stuff. But it is up to us at some point to decide whether or not we feel it is A, ready or B, worth it to put out there. Because it's artistic integrity. People are always like, why don't you do this? And why don't you do this? And you're like, dude, that's me, my name is on the line, you know, so that's a hard thing sometimes.
Starting point is 00:54:49 But you know what's great about this and this just proves my point. Look at this crowd, right? Yeah. And the thing is is that we were forced to do it on our own, to reach our own audiences, right? My Tiger Valley fans are people that, like this guy right here, right, are my real fans. that's why when I see him we hug and I'm very like nice because he's family
Starting point is 00:55:08 you kissed him on the mouth yeah yeah I'll kiss him in the mouth I'll give him a fuck yeah I don't give a fuck way too far way weird
Starting point is 00:55:12 it's very weird you've never been to Europe you can still taste sweet and sour you want to spray some of this on your mouth or is it no you're good
Starting point is 00:55:20 okay yeah but you know that's what's great about this new age is that, I was talking to that kid Andrew Schultz. He's a fucking beast. Schultz is the shit.
Starting point is 00:55:29 Yeah, we love him. One of the funniest guys I have ever fucking seen. I'm being real. He's a murderer. He's a murderer, right? He's so dope. And I'm like, he's like, I just did it on YouTube. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:36 And I'm like, oh, you just do it on your, that generation of people, they do it on their own. Yeah. And for years we've had gatekeepers. There's five or six guys that make all the decisions. If those six don't like you, you're out. Yeah, that's true. You're out, but that's not the game now.
Starting point is 00:55:51 The game is not you. Everyone can compete. And, you know, we've found our audiences. Like, look at this, right? So, in many ways, you know, we're winning. That's right. Okay. Thank you, Bob. Bob, sit down he's gonna he's gonna it's what he's got to do this is what he's got to do um just we literally
Starting point is 00:56:18 only have like a couple more if you have something uh a black dog question perhaps would be dope anybody go what do you got what do you got That guy. That guy. That guy right there. Sorry. What's up? I've got a question for you, Andrew. Okay. What was the exact text? Sorry.
Starting point is 00:56:31 Sorry. Don't leave. Don't leave. Great. This is going to be me up here, sad. No, please sit. Please stay. I need you.
Starting point is 00:56:38 What was the text that you sent to Neil Brennan that caused him to cut you out of his life? Yes. Yes. Well, you know, we're cool now. You do know that, right? Oh, shit. Neil Brennan, that's why we're on tonight's show. Oh, yeah. He's... So, Bob, you gonna come back or not?
Starting point is 00:56:57 No, Bob. We got five more minutes. Come sit down, please. Bob. Well, don't sleep till fucking five and eat food then. And then complain about it. Yeah, and then bitch about it. Sit your fucking ass
Starting point is 00:57:09 in the chair. Thank you. Good boy. So you know Neil. Of course. And Brennan and I, these guys know, I've talked about it.
Starting point is 00:57:17 Neil and I got very close and then we got into a bad fight and now we're dope again. In fact, I just did his show today and we had to smooth over some shit and now we're dope again. In fact, I just did his show today and
Starting point is 00:57:25 we had to smooth over some shit and he was asking me what the text was. The reason I didn't share it and I won't share it now, genuinely, is out of respect for Neil because it really did hurt our relationship. I know what happened.
Starting point is 00:57:43 Come on. So, out of respect for my now my friend again who we had a little turmoil I can't I wish I could
Starting point is 00:57:52 no no no but let me say this you're smart enough you if you listen to that again you can piece together what I probably said if you're smart enough
Starting point is 00:58:01 I think I know what it is and I didn't even hear yeah you probably know yeah yeah but anyway I'm sorry but we're smart enough. I think I know what it is, and I didn't even hear. Yeah, you probably know. But anyway, I'm sorry, but we're cool now, and I've always had love for that dude. I think he's a genius of comedy. So a small little bump in the road
Starting point is 00:58:15 is not going to stop us from continuing our fucking friendship. Dude, you high-roaded the shit out of that answer. I tried, yeah. I tried hard. Well, because I respect that dude, and I fucking love him. I know some people that you have a problem with. It's secrets. I can say them. If we don't end now, I can say them. Let's take one more question.
Starting point is 00:58:33 Let's take one more question. Two more. Okay, this guy and that guy, and then that's it. That's all we got time for. Thank you so much for doing this. Yeah, that guy and that guy. What's up? Yellow shirt. Hi, guys. Can you do... I don't know if it could be more organic and maybe cathartic's up? Yellow shirt. Hi, guys. Can you do... I don't know if it could be more organic and maybe cathartic if you did it at the end,
Starting point is 00:58:49 but could you do a remix of me and my friend walking down the street with Black Thought? With Black Thought, though. Black Thought remixing. I don't know. What are you saying? With Black Thought? I'm singing solo, bro. I'm the artist. I don't know if he's ever heard that song.
Starting point is 00:59:05 Hey, Ru, do you want to check it out, man? Check this shit out, man. Do you want me to get into it or what? Bobby did a song and it caught fire. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Let this other human ask a question and then we'll... Sit down, real fast. Sit down.
Starting point is 00:59:19 Sit down, please. Thank you for that. And then this is the last one and then we really got to do it. And then you can do your fucking song and dance for the camera. Hey, what was the best set of comedy you've ever witnessed? A best set of comedy I've ever seen? Ever witnessed. Witness, yes.
Starting point is 00:59:35 Live? You probably got some good ones. You've seen some fucking legendary shit. No? I mean, I saw a really killer set from Dave Chappelle at Radio City, I think maybe two years ago. Did you ever play with him? I played with Dave Chappelle. That's what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:59:54 You guys play together. But is it ever organized or is it just like on the whim? It's kind of Dave's like, let's do this. You're like, all right. Both. You know, sometimes it's organized. Sometimes he just pops up or, you know, we'll pop up. Because the block party, right?
Starting point is 01:00:06 That was, where did he do that at? We did that in Brooklyn. Out on the street. That was fucking phenomenal. But is he doing it now where he's just like, let's just try it. Let's just wing it and fuck around. Yeah. Yeah, that's wild. So he'll call you up and be like, do you want to come play? He was trying to convince me to perform just a week ago with him in New York City, like on the fly.
Starting point is 01:00:23 You didn't want to do it? No. I high-rooted the shit out of that. All right, good. Listen, I am humbled and happy that you guys all came out. We're going to end this the way that you wanted it, yellow shirt. Thank you. Much love and much respect to Black Thought.
Starting point is 01:00:44 Ladies and gentlemen, Black Thought. All right, go ahead, Bobby. I am... No, don't do that. I'm not good with rhythm. That's why I did it. All right, let me just follow my own beat, all right? Me...
Starting point is 01:01:03 Me walking down the street my own beat, all right? Me. Okay, I got it. I got it. Me walking down the street feeling so good to me. Yeah, yeah. Having fun with my friends to the end. That's it. That's it, you guys.
Starting point is 01:01:19 Thank you so much. Bobby Lee, Black Thought. Thank you guys so much for coming out. I appreciate you. Thank you, dude. This was fucking huge. Thank you so much. Bobby Lee, Black Thought, thank you guys so much for coming out, I appreciate you. Thank you dude, this was fucking huge, thank you so much. You guys are the fucking best, thank you for coming to this man, thank you guys, appreciate it. Thanks for coming out to Comedy Pro
Starting point is 01:01:39 at the Just for Laughs Festival in collaboration with Lotto Quebec and enjoy the rest of the fest.'re that creature in the ginger beard sturdy ginger like vampires the ginger gene is a curse gingers are beautiful you owe me five dollars for the whiskey and 75 dollars for the horse gingers are hell no this whiskey is excellent ginger i like gingers

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