Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep09 - Mancow Morning Show

Episode Date: April 10, 2016

Kevin and Karl review the Mancow Morning Show, the April 1st, 2016 episode.  If you're unfamiliar with Mancow, he does a radio show out of Chicago and is apparently a self-proclaimed "American Badass".  The real truth is that he and the show are the worst, most cliched version of a "morning zoo" radio program straight out of 1996.  How this is still on the air is beyond us.  Enjoy our review and utter-disgust at Mancow and his crew. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello and welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts. I'm Kevin and I'm Carl and we listen to podcasts so you don't have to Today's show will be analyzing reviewing a podcast called the Man Cow Morning Show It's the April 1st show As always we will we both listen to the show separately. I've not discussed it with each other before and So without further ado. Let's find out once and for all who all these podcasts It's showtime我都想要我都想要我都想要我都想要我都想要我都想要 我都想要 我都想要

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我都想要 我都想要我都想要我都想要我都想要我都想要 W-A-T-P-W-I-T-P-W-A-T-P. Yes. How you doing, girl? I'm doing all right. I kind of cheated by picking the Man Cow Morning Show, but they do make it available as a podcast. They want people to download it, So I figured, what the hell?

Let's listen to a morning zoo show on a Chicago and see how that goes. It's very different than the podcast we've been doing recently. Obviously, high production value and lots of people on the show and a lot going on. Yeah, it's a huge pile of shit. It's amazingly terrible.

Yeah, it's really terrible. So here was my main takeaway. And I think that as we play the clips, you're gonna hear this. They have no interesting content. So they make up for it with noises, yelling, fake laughter, and random music. Yes, yeah.

Those are the four elements of this show. and I think in every clip you're gonna hear those elements. Okay. Yeah, I agree. There's a lot of times where I was listening to it. It's just, there's no rhyme or reason to what happens. It's just shit flowing into other shit. Yeah, it's like, it's so much nonsense.

It almost makes you feel like you're the idiot. Like, what, you don't get it Right, right exactly. Yeah, it's like you I'm on drum like am I just stupid for not Getting what's going on right now because it's like it's like a ADHD and fucking reading oh my god, it's just oh So why don't we start off? We like to play the clip that we think best sums up the show I'm actually gonna play the clip that we think best sums up the show. I'm actually going to play the show intro. This is the very first thing you hear when you play this podcast number one. This is the man cow morning show podcast. Listen to the show live week day mornings 5 30 to 9 30.

Oh, I know you said that night. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, never. The production guys just jerking off all over pro tools. There's even all over this. It's the same anywhere you go. It's so funny to me. I moved obviously from, for the listeners, I'm from Rochester, New York originally, and I moved out to Seattle, and now I'm in Portland, Oregon. So I'm getting out here. It's like, let me check out the radio it's the same exact format bullshit here that it is back home and Rochester it's the same like 98 like they have this fucking little the chick's jingle thing they're

like the buzz like whatever they wonder why people are listening to the radio anymore they haven't innovated this sounds what I was listening to the radio anymore. They haven't innovated. This sounds, when I was listening to this, I was like, it's 1996 in my headphones right now. Right. How is this possible that I'm time traveling? They haven't done nothing to improve upon their product. In fact, I argue it's gotten much worse. Yeah, well, because it's almost a parody of itself now.

Like it's... Right. When you do an impression, like anyone does impression of a radio guy, they're like, it's doppelabor to do it. But that's really what they fucking sound like. Right. With the toilet sound effects, you know, the family guy had a great episode, or weenie and the baby.

In the bum, the in. You know, and all that kind of bullshit, they just keep getting all these random drops that make zero sense. And this was... I thought that they were over the top with that. It's actually spot on. This show is exactly that. Right. Right.

And then it makes you wonder like it is most of the population fucking idiots. And this is fun. No, to them or what? She said that. I have a track on here. Number four, it's called the Test Audience Loved Faked Laughter. So we need more fake laughter. Like I'm just guessing this is what's going on

behind the scenes. Guys, ratchet up the fake laughter, that tested really well. Listen to this clip. Nobody's gonna believe anything we say today. We got those don't there. I can see the white even. No, guns and roses.

Pfft. Oh, fuck. And there's a bunch of people on this show too and they're all talking over each other and laughing for no reason and no one's making jokes. Yeah, there's this. There's a part Kevin. Kevin, who's the funny guy out of this show? Did you figure that out? I I didn't. I assume it's supposed to be right. Man Cow is just a fucking asshole. Like he's just trying to be a dick. Right. Right. And he's doing a very good job of it. And then they have chips. Enough is on there who's the singer from enough is enough, which was a shitty 80s quasi

hair metal band. And back when it used to be okay to like name yourself after the fucking band that you were in. Like you said, I'm gonna let's name it Zanuff now because my band is enough to death. You know like a... Not like Zanjani Ramon. It doesn't exactly have the same feel to it. Yeah, but it's like you don't really see that anymore. There isn't like fucking you know John Errol Smith or like anything like that. It's like you don't really see that anymore. There isn't like fucking you know John Aerosmith or like anything like that It's just not really You know, it's like it that you don't see it anymore

Aerosmith is the oldest band. I know I don't know why that was my It's just it's so fucking horrible and there's a part in here where well, they're all talking over each other I can't do that. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it.

I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it.

I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. a backstate, like someone cutting a wrestling promo. Because I think they're, like the setup is that they take phone calls and someone calls in and is like, Hey, you know who I want to hear is to do enough so enough record.

And everyone's, and like, it's obviously, it explodes. Yeah, and it's obviously like a stupid fucking dumb call that they're doing for a bit. And like, man, Kyle plays it off like, enough's enough to piece of shit band, which is true. But Chip is there and he's like, well, he's really calling because he wants to hear the song, bit.

And like, everybody just starts fucking like, oh yeah, it's pandemonium. It's unbelievable. And it's like such an innocuous thing that they all freak out about. Yeah. If you don't mind, I want you to play my version of this that I quit because I did a little bit of production.

Okay. And I put something at the end of it that I think is pretty appropriate. It's track night. It's called, this is not multiple shows tracked on top of each other. I swear to God. Because when you listen to this, it's something I just took four random shows that were completely unrelated and just tracked them on top of each other. Right. You had to go to the bottom. I'm here on the boat, you're right. Selfie, not a shit. I'm talking to a friend of yours.

I'm talking to a friend of yours. I'm talking to a friend of yours. Your friend is so sweet. Who is that? Is that Johnny enough, your brother? That's his soul, friend. Who is that Philly's Dean up? You're the one who's the sweet, old, sweet, old, sweet.

Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? I don't? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that?

Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that?

Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who is that? Who could make head your tails of anything anyone was saying just there? But I mean, even if it's supposed to just be... Like if that's what they're going for, it's just a bunch of garbled mess and it's supposed to be funny.

It's not funny at all. It's highly annoying to be driving to your fucking on your way to work. I'm assuming Mac I was a morning show. It is. It's a morning show. 530-930. Can you imagine a 530-morning leap? Could you imagine waking up and hearing this shit? I'm away under the watch. I would fucking drive my car head on and the fucking old lady. Maybe that's why there's so much violence at Chicago. Yeah, it's because I wonder if we can do a study that ties this directly to the homicide rate.

There seems to be a link detective. This car was also 2 to 98 9 just before the drive by. It's like a lot over episode. Well, I think we got a man cow problem. No, there was that quick line and it's like they give the look and they're always on top of everything. I used to use their This is some kind of weird shit and this this town's listening to a lot of man cow I like that one episode where cober commander guest stars remember that one. Oh, yeah, that was a good one He's like, yeah, you listen to man cow every morning on your radio I just want to do that for you. Yeah, the society's tea It's okay. I got a little bit of a list, but it doesn't matter

Your cop killer, but are you the meat? Oh wait, I'm a cop now new Czech city All right, you want to you want to take the next terrible clip? Yeah, let me Let me see what I just steal that one from you. No, no because that one just sounded like fucking Russell media to me or something So they kept on Coming back and this is just shows you how fucking idiotic morning radio is but I clip this I'll let you listen to it first and then we'll talk about it here. Why? I'm a baby. I need some movie juice mama named this rock and roll song from the loop nursery and win.

and win. Name the song an artist right now to win 591 rock or 591 World of Scores. Next. The man cow now to win from the loop America's number one rock radio station. Number one. Okay. That's fucking K. They played. They played that stupid fucking Beatles low-by thing a

Billion times in this fucking show, right? Baby wants a booby-jews Good, but baby wants a booby-jews. Oh my god. It's so fucking gross stupid and how many fucking people called in with the wrong answer fucking group stupid. And how many fucking people called in with the wrong answer, which has got to be a plan. That was fake. Yeah, because someone's like, is it twisted sister? Yeah, and then he played twisted sister like after. It's like, right.

They already had it right. Yeah, everything about the show is fake. One of the things that I fucking hate about these types of shows is the prank phone calls. The prank phone call element of these shows is so fake. And if you're gonna make a prank phone call, then you can actually write jokes if you want to. These are fake prank phone calls with zero jokes.

Right, right. I have two examples of this. I'm not even sure which is worse. Why don't you start with, let's start with the very first one from the show, Track 2. I called it, prank phone call with terrible jokes and production and zero redeeming qualities. I just want to point this out. Somebody keeps writing the levels of the music behind the scenes on the show.

So all this music just comes ramping up and then it comes right back down again and they'll pull it up and then they'll pull it down Just a little bit and let it play the music levels are all over the fucking place and this is a perfect example of that Right here put him on the phone Put him on the phone You think you're talking to you Talk to me I will kick your ass me You need to quit young you're gonna have a heart attack killing Are you dead? Hello? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, I'm gonna have a... Okay, but what the fuck just happened there? So as I was listening to that, I was thinking about like what...

So it's gotta be the service that they use, right? Where they buy clips and shit, the prep burger thing or whatever the hell the... Exactly. Do we want to explain that real quick for people who aren't familiar with that? Yeah, I mean, I'll do my best and you can help me out. I guess so Prepperger as far as I understand it is a radio service Where you can buy pre-produced clips like the ones we just heard that phone call that prank phone call So it's it's a lot of produced comedy bits if you will that you can use to

Drop into your own show to make it sound like they're from your own fucking show and they're not. They're the same bits and contests and bullshit like that that all fucking radio stations and a network around the country use for their shows because they don't have talented people that know how to write jokes or do anything funny. That's exactly right. They'll sell it to one station per market and they'll say, do you wanna be the prep burger station

and they'll buy this content and they actually have a production house making fake prank phone calls and other bits that you hear on these morning shows, these routine bits. So that's the same one you hear in Jacksonville as the one you hear in Seattle, and they act like it's, they created or produced it.

Right. But the amazing part is that they could probably do a better job. It's not good. Yeah. Well, I have a clip actually of one that's definitely a pre-done song, and you can see exactly where they dropped Man Cow into the song. Oh, okay great

I'd like to kick their ass Hello everyone, I'm man cow mall or American bad ass and I like to do. I like to kick ass. It's Madden Cow. Hit a kick your ass. It's Madden Cow. It's Sir Nave here. Exactly. That's exactly what it is. I didn't even hear that when I listen to this. He's the American badass.

That's what Madden Cow is. I guess. This guy, he sounds...'s so bad ass about this guy what is he doing exactly so yeah I lost by faith in humanity listening to this fucking bucket like every show that we do at w atp it seems like it gets a little bit worse worse as it goes, but when we got to this one, I was like, holy fuck, like this is just the worst of the worst. And I know it's, it's really not a podcast or it's more radio show, but it's the same goddamn thing essentially. And, oh,

I don't know, man, I, I, I, I could only find a few clips to take because I was just so like, I'm not gonna let you quit out of me here. Yeah, I'm sorry man. I gotta torture you a few more weeks. You're not quitting out of me now. Wait until you hear about the teaser for next week's episode. You said it keeps getting worse. You are correct. That's exactly what's going on. I have a clip here that I call man cow is a liar and the opposite of cool. Listen, I at at at 10 a.m. yesterday, I was I'm so I got so much stuff going on. Wife and kids and job and I took what? A Xanix Xanix I got asleep. I got asleep in oxy.

I went to bed around 11 o'clock last night. I took an oxy an ambient and a Xanix at around 10 between 10 and 11 a.m. yesterday. Oh my god. What's up Elvis? It's crazy. It's crazy. This is a conversation that I would hear in junior high school. He's bragging about how much drugs he took yesterday.

If June 14 here, he'd be like, what are we 12? We're breaking up, I'll take a pill. We're gonna get 13. I have the playground. He didn't take quite enough pills in my opinion. He should have fucking taken all of his pills. Oh, gee. Yes.

But isn't that amazing to me that that is what count in his book, I guess that makes him really cool? It's like this show is geared towards 14-year-old boys. Like that's like what? Yes, the target audience are people who cannot follow a conversation. They don't want to hear poo people talking back and forth. They just want to hear noises and sounds and laughing and yelling. Right. Right. There's a we were talking about one clip where they're just talking over each other there's another one that I clipped it's Trek 8 out

here where you know they pick up a call and like you were saying it seems like everything is set up or something they pick up a call the color just makes a comment and everyone gets so excited that they all have to start talking over each other I hail you in the cool, especially at Hot Lollipop over their Kathy. Kathy is wonderful. I'm like a praying anchor today. What's up? So easy on the eyes and the thighs.

What's up? And all my mattresses were my sleep happy on top of that. What's up? What can I do for you, Tony, Tony, Tony? I just pitch it like constantly stretching time. Like, let's just make everything last as long as possible. The guy said something. Let's talk about it for a half hour. Right. It's almost like they all have, like, they all have pre-like recorded bits of banter. And they all have their

key. Like, they all have to turn their key at the same time like Nuclear bomb so they're like so make up like all right Okay, we're gonna give those things gonna come on We're gonna play a play a while this club. We're real quick all right There we go. Yeah, I play the crap and everyone turns their fucking keys at the same time like oh Yeah, yeah, she's got fucking five sometimes I was I, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, it's just, oh my God, it's just, no. What's amazing to me is that, uh, man, Kyle's a pretty famous morning disc jockey. I've, I've heard his name for years.

He's been around for a long time. That's one, oh, one of talk radio is you don't talk over each other. It's fucking one, oh, one, right. Right. Right. It's the first thing you learn, it's just, I don't know, it's gotta be what you're saying. They're just trying to stretch time. Like he's probably, he's been around for a long time

so he's probably fucking cashed in and just is zoning out at this point. Oh, he is, he is definitely cashed in. He's, he is tuned out. There is no way he's putting any type of he's there's no pride in his work at this point. Yeah, because it's you and you can see it. Obviously that he's just letting he's going through the the motions. Yeah. Or in this case, he's going through the noises. So that caller called in to say that uh, Kathy, Kathy, the Greek is attractive. So let's

get into Kathy a little bit here, Kevin. First, I want you to play Track 11. This is called Kathy maintains a fake laugh for six seconds. Why? right now. Tony, run, say page down. Tony. Holy shit. Was that all? It's not a little you looped it. That is. Oh my God. So Kathy is what's known as and I'm stealing this from opian Anthony because they would play these, these morning shows and analyze them. Kathy is the whole, okay?

H-O-L-E. And when I say that she's the whole of the show, her role on this show is to be the feminist voice of reason because the guys are wacky and crazy. They're out there, man. They're gonna say some crazy stuff that she's gonna go Come on guys tone it down. She's like the she's like the nagging mom Right, right that's and every every one of these radio shows has this character on the show

Yeah, and the whole the whole on the show like I said has a very specific role There was this one part in the show. I couldn't believe this happened. Everyone's making all this noise, talking over each other, and then Kathy made a perfect whole noise. And I grabbed the ISO. I think we should continue to use this for future shows. Play track time.

It's perfect because how was it even that quiet for that one? There's no beat in the background. There's no sound effects. Nothing's, you know, echoing through the fucking, the studio, it just got quiet and you got to do that. Oh, perfect fucking whole noise. So then, Alonzo Bowden comes on, who's a funny standup comedian, and I've heard him

on other shows, and I've heard him be very funny and captivating on other shows. And this is how you know that the talent of the show is terrible, because they take someone who has talent and make them uninteresting. So Alonzo Bowden had terrible segments on the show, and there's a few that I clipped that I wanted to point out. There were almost zero laughs because Mancun doesn't know how to ask an interesting question that he couldn't actually come up with someone funny for and he's just a bore. But there was one huge laugh. Listen to Track 13, I clipped this after O'onzo told a joke an

maybe a six. It wasn't that but listen to this reaction. All right. You know that. I'm like, yeah, yeah, this is one of yours. Okay. You clean matter. That is the fun. That's your that's the funniest thing I've ever, that's hilarious.

That's the funniest thing you've ever said. That's the funniest thing you've ever said. So this is the, this is exactly the difference between a good show and a shitty show because full disclaimer, I'm still in Rochester, New York. We have this guy called Brother Weez and I've actually been on his show a couple of times and he's a fucking tremendous hack. He's terrible. He's been around forever and

he people listen to him. But anytime there is something funny said, he has to stop and make a big deal about it. A good quality show will let a joke land enjoy it and keep going Expect there to be more jokes instead. They're just like holy shit. That was a funny joke Did everybody just hear that jokie told that was a funny joke? That was maybe the funniest joke I've ever heard Holy cow. What are you a comedian? Because it shoes up fucking 30 seconds of airtime that they don't have to fucking have nothing else to talk about so right Right, well, I mean they could really just play sound effects. I think the whole fucking show and no no the difference Yeah, I mean we could do the same fucking thing if we wanted I know I wanted to put sound effects on these clips, but it'd be a possible to decipher what I put on there and what was in the show right.

Just out of that noise. I had to explain that what I put in there and tell you that yeah, yeah, this is actually wasn't out of the show. Right. Okay, here's another funny one with Alonzo. It's track 14 multiple fuck ups in a four second window. Alonzo Bowden is here. I'm the man cow and what do you do on the Cal. And what do you do on the travel channel? What did you do on the travel channel? Oh, man. How could you bring that up? Oh, hang on. We'll

talk about when we come back. I got to do a quick break. Splash. All I bumped you. That's that bumped. What? So zero prep went into this. He asked him a question about something that Alonzo obviously doesn't want to talk about. It's not a good thing. But even if he had asked him a question about something that he did want to talk about, there was no time to talk. Right. Hey, what's going on with that show? Oh, man, I just say, all right, well, I can't get to it right now. We got to go to traffic and we got to look at sports and weather because he's not. He's not paying attention to his producer who I'm sure is fucking holding up the, you know, we need to go to

break sign. So he's like, oh, I I'm sure is fucking holding up the, you know, we need to do it a break sign. So he's like, I got this question with fucking Alonso and then he asks the question and then he sees the signal and he's like, oh, fuck, I gotta go. And then Alonso's like, I don't wanna talk about that anyway. And so that's the other thing that we didn't even talk about yet is it still harkens back to they do weather, they have a sports guy, they have a traffic reporter, like it's still Harkens back to they do weather. They have a sports guy, they have a traffic reporter. Like, it's still all this shit that nobody needs anymore. You get all that information on your phone,

the minute you wake up, it's all right there. No one's getting in the car and going, I wonder if the black hocks won last night. It's totally unnecessary. Yes, no, you're throwing it around too. Okay, we got sports coming up, we got traffic, we got weather on the 9s. Bloods like, what, who is this audience? And like you said, 14 year old boys, okay, that makes sense for all the noises and bullshit. But then I guess the other target is like 70 year olds who

don't have smartphones and don't understand how the internet works. Right. Right. Well, because it it's it's very antiquatedated and they, yeah, I mean, like I understand if you're driving and you want, maybe they go to traffic, that makes sense. That I can get the times, I don't give a shit if they say the time in the morning because there's a fucking clock on everything you own. It's 20 minutes past the hour. Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm a traffic, I'm a traffic traffic weather weather traffic coming up I have a I have a clip where he he just breaks what he's saying to say the fucking time this is pretty funny

all right baby just chill man chill just relax in the bean bag for a moment okay let's go back to Jean-Pierre hello Jean-Pierre you know man count love you you, love you, so. Any big plans this weekend? Six a.m. by the way. Uh, no, not yet. Ha ha ha.

Anything plans this week? I hope it's six a.m. Six a.m. by the way. It's very important. What the fuck? But yeah, it's like if we had a person on here that was like, Hey, let's go to, uh, we got to go to Billy Bob out in uh out in the country uh how what's the price of eggs out there right now and then we we cut

to the we cut to a guy he's like the price of eggs is three dollars uh uh uh uh uh fucking uh basket and we're like all right thanks so much for that it's like just information Kevin I don't know how much you go shopping. He'll buy eggs by the dozen, not by the baskets. Well, you know, the country is different, you know? Oh, right, right. They just pile up a basket of eggs. A basket of eggs. The transport rocks.

Maybe I really do need an egg person. I don't know. No, I think what would be fun is if we had gas prices by city, you know, we just keep all right What's the gas prices Chicago? Okay, come it up. We got Milwaukee's coming up later. We got Seattle We got Los Angeles sticker out for that 45th past the hour 45 past the hour that means quarter to the next hour and means we got gas prices coming up We got weather we guys for it's weather gas

Maybe I miss by calling actually a morning jack. Yeah, it's and he sounds actually man costumes a lot like Bubba the loves bunch to his well, I mean they all sound the same They all get the really deep voice Listen, I'm the American badass watch out American badass here Well, I got me a hot wife and I make a couple million dollars a year to do hardly anything. All the radio and I have old retired hair metal singers who come in and talk over me. Wow. Yeah, chips enough is definitely like their stunt boy guy.

He's just constantly screaming and he's just erratic. Yeah. The entire show is if everything's just crazy. Everything's going out. It's crazy. One other part from the Alonzo Bowden interview. I call this man. How talks over the guest and then makes it awkward. Great man. Good friend of ours. And thank you for. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks for tonight's adventure sports traffic coming up. It's cheap trick day. We got cheap trick. Take a tiny mini cut off. What a dick.

The guys like, yeah, and sports tomorrow. We got cheap trick. Yeah, he should have just left it alone. I mean, it's he talks over everyone I'll show. And he's like, oh, didn't mean to cut you off. Yeah. Oh, sorry, ball. That's what I'm so unprofessional. Yeah. You have a bunch of clips here, man. I wish that I had clipped more, but I think I was just more irate than anything else. Well, all right. I'll tell you what. I have a clip on here that I call the only funny part of the show.

And the only reason I clipped it is because I actually did think it was pretty funny. So I thought, well, what the hell? I'll steal this content, too. I mean, man, cow, did. Nick Offerman. To Cheers, human beings are hats. Sex is just prostitution, where the payment is sex. Yes. Every bag of chips is family-sized, if you're an orphan.

Beef jerky is really just a meat raisin. Jedi Knights close all their applications using force quits. Taking candy from a baby is actually a responsible thing to do. College ruled is both a type of paper and something losers say. A good name for a penis is the Lorax. One observation on that, Kevin. Yeah. Do you notice how long it took for those guys to get the joke every time?

There was like this log delay on the uptake and they're like oh I get it. Well it's like they don't want to leave any dead air so they're like I got a laugh at this every single thing that he says. This was the only thing that I thought was actually funny. Maybe I'm wrong but a lot of those jokes are really good and they're like but then they say something stupid they They're all like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Red cow is the American buy it as man cow. All right, I got another clip. This is a longer one. It's called fake prank phone call with no payoff.

And when I say no payoff, I don't know why anyone would think this is funny or interesting to listen to. Hi, is this all? Yes, it is. This is Terry. How are you? Good, George. Well, your friends shipped in and buy you a free time at the phone text. Yeah, so, um, do you have time? I just got out of the shower.

You know, you call me at the right time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, me at the right time. Yeah, I just got to stop. Stop, stop. Stop. Okay. I just want to say, you know, if you are this dummy who's in your car and you're listening to this show, how would you possibly think this is real? You think that someone would call a guy like, hey, your friends paid for phone sex.

And he's just like, yeah, I just got out of the shower. Let's do this. Right. How is that even close to possible that that would happen? So already, and these guys are pretending that you don't, ah, this is great. Oh, it's fucking retarded. So they've already started with a premise that is totally unbelievable and dumb.

But anyway, let it run. Tell me, Jack, can you open your hair? Oh, I'll be there. Do you have a hair? Actually, this is quite hard. anyway but it run. I can't have that. That makes your f***ing ass and family tithes. Oh, God, it feels so good. Ah, ah, time's up. Time's up. Time's up. Yeah, that'll be $15,000, please. I thought my friends were paying for it.

But you owe me the money. It's my time. I spent. Didn't you enjoy yourself, sir? How real are you? Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna hang out on the loop. Farting in the must-vis of Morning Radio.

What the fuck? There was a fart noise farting in the boss pitch. A farting in the... It's just like metal drums and riffs. You can, you can, you can, you can, you can, you can, you can, farting in the boss pitch. Fuckin' tight. All right.

So I just want to do a quick analysis of that prank phone called, when you have a angle that you're going for, you need a payoff to that. They decided because they didn't have an angle or a payoff to just try to get as much stuff in there as possible. So, you know, it starts with the, okay, I'm gonna start saying ridiculous things like I'm gonna punch you in the head and that gets me horny.

And I'm gonna super glue your testicles and blah, he's going, what? And then it turns into, oh, she's having the orgasm. Okay, so now the joke is that she's the one who's enjoying. And then it turns into, now he owes $250, even though it was a free call. So that makes zero sense. And then it's like, well, aren't you gonna pay me for my time,

which doesn't make sense, it doesn't hit. It doesn't land anywhere. They even cut to the next clip before the phone calls over because there's just there's zero pay off there. They don't go anywhere with any of that. Right. Right. Except the fact that it ate up time. Right. Right. Man, Kyle is like, I just want to get back to my mansion. But again, you're talking about prep burger. Like there's a service that's selling that call. Is if that's content, people should be listening to how is I would, I don't know. It's exhausting. Well, here, and I know what we're explaining it, but that's so exhausting. Here's the thing, like if prep burger called me tomorrow and they're like, Hey, you do pretty good voices

and shit. Let's go. I'd be like, Okay. Oh me to moral and they're like, Hey, you do pretty good voices and shit. Let's go. I'd be like, okay. Oh, yeah. I'd be like, I'll sell myself out and fucking, yeah, make shitty content. Oh my god. They called me. I'd be on, I'd be on in the studio tomorrow going, Oh, yeah. What are you wearing?

Oh, yeah. I just got to the shower. I'm ready to, let's do this. You'd be doing mental riffs and farting. This will be my, uh, this is actually my audition. You'd be doing mental ribs and farting. This will be my this is actually my audition tape that we're doing right now. All right. You're setting this over to him. Oh, oh, hey, yeah. Oh, it's my friends paid for this. Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Well, yeah, why don't I just jerk off while I'm on the call with you because you just called me out of the blue and that makes sense. Yeah. And somehow this call was prepaid for.

the blue and that makes sense. Yeah. And somehow this call was prepaid for. It's so fucking dumb. And, uh, oh, sex even appealing with webcam girls. I don't want to get too far down the scrap at all. But anyway, all right. Um, I have a couple other clips in here and I'm debating whether they're going to add anything else that we haven't already covered. He does this thing where he has these transitions into breaks. There's lots of them. There's lots of breaks. And he never transitions it right. It always catches him by surprise. It's always abrupt and awkward. If you play track, I think it's seven. Now what would you take now to bring you down a little bit? Obviously you got an upper. What do you need? Cannabis? What do we need to get?

No kids. I think it. 979. The loop. What is that? I believe a key on the station. This is WLUPM. Chicago.

The man cow on the loop. What the fuck? I didn't combine different parts. that's really how the show goes. Oh my god. The loop, man cow, the little Chicago, the loop, man cow. And just like one of those drum fills actually is from Macedon, I think. Oh, speed, well, I was like, I have something. Right?

Yeah. But it was funny about that is that he goes, he his sidekick there are questions like what do you need? I got downer like some cannabis the guy starts to answer that's like Oh bad guy in the morning Nobody fucking paying attention to anything here. Yeah, it's just fucking to constantly just it's rops to fucking breaks and yes It's terrible. Do you have anything else you want to play? I don't know. I don't think so. I think we've done a good job of analyzing and reviewing Man Cow in the morning what a giant piece of shit and I don't say this lightly But if you listen to that show, you're an asshole

Look in the mirror. Look yourself in here. I spent a couple of minutes Try to reevaluate your fucking life. You dummy the whole on your face where your words come out is an asshole It's a puckered asshole. Oh, you you bring nothing you add nothing We are now dumber for listening exactly. I should have I should have clipped that Um, all right cool So We're gonna do this again next week, Kevin, because we do this every week. It's not going to make out going a totally different direction for you, which I'm sure you will appreciate. I found another podcast for us to listen to and this podcast,

well, I'm not gonna give anything away. Why don't you play our teaser for next week? I should have put it in my podcast. I got late, two times a 12 hour. It's already recording, so yeah. Make sure that's in there. I probably won't get late, like two weeks now, but hey. It works.

Welcome to the podcast. It's not charged. We serve our way through life books. And how can I treat this as this? I'm just, oh my gosh, give me a second. She's stretching and I'm all snuffly. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I was excited.

I know. I feel like really fucking good. Like it's like an orgasm. You're just like, oh my God. What the fuck was going on in that clip? So that was, I'm not joking. The very beginning of the show. That's how the show starts. It on in that clip. So that was, I'm not joking, the very beginning of the show. That's how the show starts.

It started in mid conversation. It might have been mid word. Was she, sound like someone was doing Coke in the background or something? Oh, probably. Did you hear the snorting and stuff? That's what it's like to me. That's why I was like, what the fuck am I listening to?

Well, that's a good point. Well, play that again, because I want you to key in and how abruptly this starts. Okay. I should have put it in my pocket. I got late, two times a kill. It's already recording. Fuck yeah.

Make sure that's in there. I probably won't get late. It's like two weeks now, but hey. It works. Welcome to Cocktails. It's not charged. We serve our way through life books. And how can I treat this as Liz?

I'm just. Oh my gosh. Give me atails. It's not charged. We said for way through life books of how to call treat this is Liz. I'm just, oh my gosh, give me a second. She's chatting and I'm all snuffly. Oh yeah. Oh my god. I feel like really fucking good. Like the second orgasm. You're just like, you're on something there because at first it's like up.

And then there's a couple like, you know, it's, she's getting really ramped up for this episode. Yeah, yeah. And not only the fact that the fucking first girl's like, this is the stuff, she says her goddamn title so fast. I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, they're both fucking coked out of their minds. This is what I'm guessing.

Here's the description on iTunes. So this is called Cocktails and Centires. It's, we are two women who really enjoy a good cocktail and even better read and all things pop culture Jessica. Oh my God. Oh, if they don't write incidences, there's no periods. I see people on Facebook who do this like that was covered in second fucking grade. It makes it so difficult to read things when it just goes on. And even better read and all things pop culture Jessica is a newly wed mother of one full-time student and part-time phone survey goddess Elizabeth is a wife mother of

two a stay-at-home mother by day and badass novelist by night. We are both fast witted smartasses who have been having a great time together for the last 17 years. Now when that's's fast-witted. These two have procreated. That makes me fucking really worried. Well, get kids. All right, so this episode that recommending we review is called Marijuana for Your Vagina,

number 50. Okay. Yeah. I used to sound so defeated How did this bullshit Very very interesting, but yeah, it starts out like you could tell obviously she starts rolling the clip And she's like oh, yeah, it's cuz I got totally fucking double-fisted last night. Oh leave that in there Leave that in there. Oh, I feel like a fuck I got it for a while. Oh, yeah Hey, I was blowing freak eyes for my husband and I, leave that in there. Leave that in there. Oh, I feel like a fuck to get it for a while. Oh, yeah, hey, I was blowing freak eyes for my husband and I'll leave that in there. Oh, I'm already looking forward. What you have a chance to process these

two twats voices. I can't hear what you come off with as your impressions for the I just do Cobra Commander is this... what are these bitches talking about? I got late last night, leave that in there. I'm all sniffly this morning. You know when you stretch and it sounds like you have an orgasm, ah! We should transcribe the episode and re-record it as the episode and re-record it. It'll be like a Copa commander and Nicholas Cage will be the new hosts of the show. Hey, I'm just gonna ask you what all these people looking for the declaration of independence for. I'm not gonna get late this weekend! The only thing that Nicholas Cage talks about when I do his voice is the difference. I have to work it in somehow every time. It's fucking perfect.

So join us again next week because it might be the show where we find out once and for all who are these podcasts. Sleep well every pony.I'm a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a man a manLive