Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep267 - Hungry Cat Daily
Episode Date: July 11, 2021Remember Garfield? It was a comic for children that wasn't even remotely funny. Well, that's not going to stop these two improv comics from trying to turn it into an entertaining podcast for adults. B...ig swing and a big miss! This week Vinnie calls in sick but Producer Chris steps up, he listened to four episodes of this show. Four!! Then Soft Weekly joins the show to discuss Jessica Kirson's Disgusting Hawk podcast and Patty C Cups latest offerings. Finally, we wrap up with this week's best of Stuttering John. Support us and get bonus episodes: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/ Get tickets to our very first live show near Chicago on August 28th http://watplive.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I'm gonna give this a 1.895.
This one sucks.
It's a show two.
Are you a boner guy?
Cuzz.
Cuzz a row.
Cuzz a row.
Slapper Rooney.
Show time.
W-A-T-P-W-A-T-P. Hello, everyone.
It's a cousin who's welcome to another episode.
Who are these podcasts?
The only show that is hoping the winner of the European Cup will be the tail band.
I'm your host, Carl Hamburger, with me this week, the man filling in for Vinnie,
which means he has big shoes to fill big pants, a big shirt, huge belt. It's producer Chris,
everybody. Well, I can produce a Chris. Thanks for having me. Vinnie actually called in
sec. Yeah. So this is two weeks in a row now. Yeah. Shout out to Shuley, by the way, who
gave, uh, gave me a nice shout out in his latest podcast. And we'll definitely connect soon.
Please go to who are these dot com email address, voice mail number, link to our sub right
at link to our discord server, link to our merchandise, link to our YouTube channel.
And that link to Patreon and super cast featuring two exclusive bonus episodes every month.
Next week I'm recording another crossover with the Dik show.
That should be a lot of fun.
Also go to w atplive.com.
That's where you can get tickets for our show
and Lumber, didn't know I just outside of Chicago.
Hey, on August 28th, who's gonna be there?
I feel like I'm not explaining what's going on here.
This is a live show.
We're gonna have producer Chris.
We're gonna have Jen from the Jingle's department.
We're gonna have Andy.
We're gonna have Kroger's.
We're gonna have Vity.
It's gonna be there.
And there's gonna be some talent also, like,
Dr. Steve is gonna be there.
Vic, crippled Jesus.
The artist formerly known as DigiNay.
Also, we encourage our listeners
to give us a five-star review on Apple Podcasts
and then shit all over us in the comments section today.
We'll be reviewing a show called Hungry Cat Daily.
This is a suggestion from Mike. We have both listened separately. We have not discussed it. We
just got the beforehand. Let's get into it. This is show hosted by Nick Ramirez from UCB New York
and Lance Gilstrap from the Victroa podcast. Now, right off the bat, I'm going, uh-oh,
because UCB is of course improv comedy, sketch comedy,
true, and then this,
Victrol podcast, I check that out.
Did you look into that at all?
No.
So that is compelling though.
That is, once again, a sketch comedy,
improv comedy podcast.
Good stuff.
Out of Austin.
Oh boy, I let's know a little bit of that. Oof.. Well that feel definitely shines through on this. Oh boy. It sure does. All right.
Let's get started. This is a show that talks about Garfield, but not just talks about Garfield.
It does one comic strip at a time. One three panel comic strip is the entire episode
of which there are hundreds of episodes. Yes. Okay, and thankfully they're like 18 minutes long.
They're not, you know, they're not going on for hours.
Mercifully.
But God, you could really sum this stuff up
in a minute or two I would think.
This is the clip that sums up the show for me.
Uh, that was my Garfield impression.
That's trying to do that.
Well, yeah, like, because I'm trying to picture the, like, Lorenzo music, Garfield the cartoon
show, Garfield doing this.
It's tough, right?
That first panel.
So these guys think they're hilarious.
I think so.
Yeah, no, they must because they're comedians and they're talking about Garfield and this crazy. This whole premise is just nuts, right?
Whoa, can you believe it? Yeah, a whole lot of chemistry going on a whole lot of chemistry
Let's let's listen to the intro to the show
Hi all younger people out there
We'll go down together again
We can land some podcasts for the beer recapping every Garfield cough made his email
My name is the good mirrors and proteop my coast Lance Killschuk and even Lance. I won't gonna tell you
Cat's off to you Nick. Okay
This is going great. I
Know they've been doing this for a while. So I guess he's just speed reading through the intro, but I have no idea
What's going on now? Oh shit and then immediately after that. I don't know if you heard this episode
But the guy decides because the comic strip of Garfield
was from May 7th or May 2nd or something,
which happened to be the same date
that Austin Powers came out in theaters.
Okay, so I could tell by the look at your face.
You did hear this episode.
I did the foremost recent ones,
and that's an ongoing thing.
Oh, is it?
And so is it.
And so is. So is Kat's off to you. Oh, I had a feeling. I had a feeling that's an ongoing thing. Oh, is it? And so is the movie. So is cats off to you.
Oh, I had a feeling.
I had a feeling that was their tagline.
So what's an ongoing thing?
The fact that the guy does an Austin Powers impression
or just the movie.
The movie that was released on that date.
OK.
Yeah.
You can't tell me.
I have to pray
It's me Austin Powers, baby shaggy, it's a like baby. Yeah, wow Austin Powers is here Lance
Yeah, no, I suck it tell by his musical loan the title own his
Clear voice like you recognizable voice
Yeah, baby, so I make you hold me. Fucking thanks.
All right.
So what they're going to do now is going to the different segments.
Now they do have different segments.
They do on every single episode.
The first segment is the first panel.
They explain to you the first panel.
They don't go any further.
They get done with that and then they go into their next segment, which is the second
panel.
They get done with that.
Then they go into the third segment. Could you guess what panel. They get down with that. Then they go into the third segment.
Could you guess what it is?
Producer Chris.
I'm going to go third panel.
Then they do ratings.
They rate what they give the comic.
Then they name it or they name the episode and they figure out the name.
It will be.
And then they do a ranking for some reason.
Like how does it rank amongst all of the Garfield comic strips?
I think is what that means.
I don't know. I'm not quite sure.
All of it is a waste of time. Yeah, it doesn't sound like they're sure too about the format.
And I think they usually let if they have a guest on, because these two guys will have a guest
from time to time, they'll let that person describe the first panel. So in this episode,
they let Austin Powers describe the first panel, except for this guy forgets which British character he's doing very quickly.
Nick, why don't you why don't you start us off with that first man,
or unless you want Austin powers to do it?
Do you think I could do it?
Hey, that sounds like a grievey time.
It sounds like a groovy time. When we was in the Beatles, it was always very clueless when I got to start things off.
I would say 1, 2, 3, 4, and then Ringo would say, hey, that's major.
So now it's Paul McCartney, or was that, did he say George just there?
I think he's going for Paul, but he sounds like John, and it's all terrible.
That doesn't make any fucking sense. I think he's going for Paul but he sounds like John and it's all terrible
Doesn't make any fucking sense
All right, let's describe the first frame of this comic Let's go and I'm gonna warn everybody so they don't get too upset. There's a lot of detail going on here
Mm-hmm, oh little too much if you think back to a Garfield comic we've all seen them
It's not intricate art. We're talking about it's not a far side cartoon, right? There isn't a lot of nuance to it. No, we could do this. It's pretty straightforward.
Okay. So we call Jean Arbuckle here and he's got a big wide green on his face. His eyes are
all big and wide. His eyes take up like half his face, you know, and he's got some big purple
phone and it's, it's, it's an odd phone for 1997, don't you think?
Yeah, it is absolutely odd because it's got the all like kind of 1980s buttons.
It's only got eight buttons, which it normally would have 10 buttons, but it has eight buttons.
I think a bit twice but it has eight buttons.
I think a bit of a double-by-ten.
Yeah, it was a double-by-ten.
Yeah.
It's missing, there's a spot for that button,
but it's not there.
And it's a very shiny purple phone.
And of course, you know, I dig purple quite a bit
on my suits a purple.
Ah! I can't fucking take it!
We're still talking about the first frame.
We don't even know what's going on.
Yeah, not yet.
Why would they think this would be an interesting premise?
And if you're going to improvise, I know I couldn't come up
with jokes on the fly, but I could roll with it
and make it sound organic.
These guys are embarrassing themselves.
Yeah, embarrassing themselves.
It's fucking clunky.
Yeah, I know.
All right, let's continue talking about frame number one.
Godfiel is looking up at it's a John looking kind of known
plus. Actually, I'm not, I don't think non plus is the right word here.
Or I forget Lance, do you remember?
Which well, you know, there's two versions.
There's the traditional non traditional.
What is it?
The one that's accurate and the one that's in it.
Yeah, non-plus is like being so shocked, you don't know what to do.
Okay, that's the traditional definition. This is non-plushed.
Non-plushed.
Think about it. Would this be interesting to you? What do you listen to this?
Did they write a note down before the show to figure out what they were going to talk about?
Do they have any sense of why they're doing this?
They're not interested. They don't even know what the question is anymore.
Right. They're not interested. I'm not fucking interested.
All right, framework. We're still going.
Anyway, Jones, very happy and Garfields doesn't give a shit and Jones saying
You will go out with me all right
So all of that just to say John our buckles on the phone saying you will go out with me now John our buckle is not a guy
It's about a pussy. I think that's one of the front like like Monday suck. Let's not use awesome
And Jack is no pussy right the three things you learn about
when you read a lot of guy.
Yeah, he's an insufferable loser, right?
Well, yeah, he lives in the cat.
Yeah.
That's sookie.
Get back over here.
So all right,
let's find out what's going on in frame number two.
Are you guys excited about this yet?
John is still holding the giant,
shiny purple phone up to his ear.
Like he must have just, he must like,
polish this thing up.
Like it just just, yeah, I think he polishes it regularly.
Or he buys a new phone like every week. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha That's terrific. That's terrific. I don't wanna see New York UCB.
I'm not interested in that at all.
Well, that phone is really polished.
Yeah, or maybe he buys a new one every week.
Yeah, come on, all right.
We'd add to that.
Sing.
hilarious.
The wit on these guys.
All right, let's get through frame number two.
Because there's not a lot going on here.
I don't know why it takes so long to figure it out.
But he's saying, win.
Okay, are you following this?
John's on the phone.
Garfield's observing this.
John's on the phone.
You will go out with me?
When?
All right, so this sets up the punchline.
And we don't get to the punchline right away,
but they do start talking about frame number three.
So John is covering the receiver end of his phone and he's looking down at Garfield and
he's clearly, his mood has changed.
He's unhappy.
He looks wild here.
He looks like with his eyes like half closed like this.
Yeah.
His, yeah, they look like two eggs.
He looks in human.
Yeah, that's real weird. He's not human. It's a cartoon
Yes, and this is what episode
200 something. Yeah, why are they surprised about how any of this looks right? Yeah, in fact
I'm gonna skip around though. You said that because they do mention that they repeat themselves from time to time
But only times have we had this discussion Nick
They repeat themselves from time to time. But many times we've had this discussion, Nick.
This is, and we always say the exact same thing.
Oh, really a show about Garfield is repetitive?
When you do hundreds of episodes about Garfield?
No shit.
All right, let's get back.
Does everyone want to know what the punchline is?
Obviously, I'm pinned to the punchline.
I'm sorry, here's the punchline to this comic.
This is frame three.
Um, and John is saying, how long is a millennium?
And Garfield is still leaning on his, on his, uh, on his arm, and he's looking very,
very smug, happy with himself, uh, and he's thinking, you'd better start getting ready.
So boy, yeah, this, this personally, the phone said. I'll go out with you in a
millennium. So I listen to a few episodes as did you. And every single one the conclusion
was, that's not very funny. Right. Yeah. Right. I don't have to read the comic to know
like Garfield's not very funny. These guys are just figuring that out hundreds of comics at a time. They lost a bet they had to do this. They lost it life. Yeah. Well,
yeah. Like John Arbuckle. These guys are the John Arbuckle's podcasting. They're fucking
losers. And John Arbuckle is based on Tom Myers I think, right? I believe that's true.
Yes. That might as well exist, but we knew he would Jim Davis knew it would have dropped him up.
He figured it out.
So then one of these fucking assholes decides to be super PC about this comic.
Yeah.
So John asked her on a date or him and they said yes.
And he said you will go out with me. When and that's when they delivered the joke in a millennium.
What is he laughing at?
Yeah, we've already gotten through that.
So wait, now, John is gay or maybe he's non-binary.
Why isn't him or her?
Like, why couldn't it be something else?
If you're going to go down that route, It's a nervous habit people have these days.
John Arbuckle is a straight man.
He likes women.
This is well established.
I didn't do this research just for this episode, Chris.
I know this.
I know what they could do about Garfield.
See, one of the guys I read when I was younger.
Did he ever hook up with Kathy?
It's why I'm so learned to get across.
Was there a crossover there?
Yeah, Kathy got pregnant and gave birth to a cat.
It was a hilarious bet that they had
It's better than this
So the thing that you notice and I notice too because they're improv guys
They're constantly cracking each other up constantly and I have a laugh comp
Let me play mine first and then we'll get into yours. Okay. This is the Laughing Supercut. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, the same thing. It's the, that old thing like, we're cracking each other up.
We're so fucking funny.
I have to leave the table I'm laughing so hard.
And I did this, basically the same thing as you.
And then I did another one because I thought it was boring.
I added a little production.
Oh, okay.
Well, I was thinking what would Patrick Michael do?
And, you know, he would play all the instruments.
And here we go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. instruments on that those guitars yeah the little segues in between panel one panel two panel three yes they have a little guitar licks yeah that playing
in between these things there's a little production going on yeah it really
breaks it up man yeah it really makes it feel like you're part of a show we
didn't hear those it were back so they bring on this woman Emma holder Emma
holder is from the Twin Bed's podcast.
So we just documented how these chuckle fucks
are cracking up at everything.
And they give her nothing.
It's so fucking funny.
Oh, the Twin Bed's podcast.
Emma Holder, Emma, how are you doing?
Hi, I'm June Gray.
I'm excited that it's not Monday.
I'm doing great. I'm excited that it's not Monday.
Wow. She thought about that one too. Yeah, she leaned in a little.
Whoops. And they're like, yeah, I know. It's not Monday.
So anyway, so later on, they're talking about the comic strip
in this specific episode. And she reminds us that they're all
comedians. Like she describes herself as a comedian. These guys are comedians. And she reminds us that they're all comedians.
Like she describes herself as a comedian,
these guys are comedians, and this is how you know.
And like he's kicking up dust,
but it kind of looks like fart clouds.
Yes, that's a common theme in early Garfield is,
every a lot of things that look like fart clouds.
Yeah, and I mean, maybe the mailman is farting
because he's nervous.
So the mailman's running away from Garfield and she's like it looks like fart clouds, you know
Expecting a hardy laugh. Oh you would think
That's anything right, but they're just like yeah, you know
Actually, there's a lot of early Garfield cartoons to have what looks like fart clouds, but you know, it's to
You're supposed to understand there's motion involved and maybe the guy is, you know, it's a single panel strip.
It's hard to understand.
The guy's running, so they put that on there.
They actually gave her a little.
They said, yeah, gas might be involved.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, no, this is, this is after that.
I'm giving her nothing.
And I mean, maybe the mailman is farting because he is nervous.
Oh, that's definitely possible.
Yeah, they're definitely like conspicuously placed those plants.
Why have a guest in your cell?
Oh my god, these guys just sh** on her.
That's so f**king great.
The rose figure, she's just like the punching bag on his own.
That fart cloud was actually a tumbleweed, I think.
Holy sh**.
God, we didn't know you were going to be this unfunny talking about Garfield or we wouldn't have
had you on the show.
Your agent said you'd be great.
This is not going the way I don't do it.
Let's talk more about Emma Holder.
I also did kind of have a crush on John, which is a little embarrassed.
You had a crush on John?
I mean, I was very...
Was it that ass? Emma very I was at that ass
Emma what's it that ass just answer the question please just answer the quote what a great joke that was
They might want to give some pity laughter to her
Just so they could possibly get it in return at some point
I think they're all laughed out
Holy shit all right, so then I'm gonna describe something that she's observed about Garfield. And again, these guys have no idea
what she's talking about.
So sometimes he's drawn cute
and sometimes he's drawn ugly.
And I care, it's something about his eyes,
like when his eyes are closed, he's cute.
And I don't remember exactly.
What the hell are you talking about?
They don't even try to help her out.
Nothing.
Nothing.
They're staring at the Zoom call.
Like, what is she talking about?
This is a video on YouTube, by the way.
Oh, I got it too.
All of these are on YouTube, and they actually show the comic.
So you can follow along.
In case you don't describe it in enough detail.
Thank goodness you can watch that on YouTube.
They keep looking at her resume while they're listening
Do we have the right ammo is this I'm a sorry?
Spill your name please
All right, so then I'm a chance to describe the first frame a lot of pressure here and Emma if you would please
Describe in as much detail as you like that first panel. Oh, wow. Oh, oh, oh, I didn't realize
I didn't know this I'll get I'll do my best. oh, I didn't realize I didn't know this. I'll do my best.
Yeah, I'll try, I don't know.
Yeah.
So I'm a game out with the awesome.
It's not Monday joke and they give her nothing.
And then num-nuts here has to make a lasagna reference
as they're talking about the fact that usually Garfield's pretty lazy and lethargic. Yeah. You know, he's chasing
after a mailman. That's not as a character for him. He doesn't move fast usually. No,
you're right. Unless they, Emma, unless there's lasagna. That's true. He can hustle for lasagna.
Everyone pretend podcasting is boring. I also like how he kind of shut her up so he can get his joke and stuff.
Everyone knows that Garfield's pretty lazy.
Yeah, but hold on a second though.
There's an exception to that.
Hold on. Wait, wait, wait.
He will run towards lasagna.
What a stupid thing that is too, that Garfield likes lasagna so fucking much.
Yeah.
Can't mix it up pizza every now and again. It's a very similar profile. Yeah.
Yeah.
For profile. Sure. I would think. Yeah. Maybe I will over thinking. I don't know where's
you.
I'm going to talk about it.
Vinny was here. He would tell all about pizza. Well, here's where you're wrong. I miss
them already. All right. So what's talk about rating these strips.
This is going back to that other episode.
It doesn't make sense.
I'm going to give this a 1.895.
OK, I mean, that's not too low.
No, it's not very high either.
Yeah, I guess this one is like this one is worse than than the median so I can see going underneath the two so I'm also gonna say like a 1.9
001
That's always a good idea to bring numbers into a joke like that. Oh fucking hilarious, right? So Emma
Does her rating and they explain to her that she's doing it wrong.
I'm gonna give it a 1.5. 1.5 wow very low. Oh, Emma, we try to give at least three points of
precision, three decimal points worth of precision just to make sure we have precise ratings.
Okay, make sure we have precise ratings 1.69
Nice Okay, well, it's only two dozen points precision and they also went up by
Glass outch
Not not good, but they do give a plug to Emma's podcast
Which I've excited about.
Yeah. Sure. I have a podcast called TwinBeds, uh, Lance and I both been guests and Lance did help us come up with the name.
Um, we're just straight up came up with it.
Uh, and then I ran it by my co-host, Jared.
It's an improv sketch, improv podcast about adult twins living in a bunker.
It sounds like she just made it up on the spot.
Yeah, but I don't think she did because I checked this out a little bit.
And I think that is the fri-bos of it.
What a plug.
And is that ridiculous?
They go out to great name.
She's like, well, yeah, I know you came up with that.
She's like, yeah, you know, Nick and Lance
have been on my show.
So these are just people circle jerking
on podcasts together.
They are wasting their time.
And ours.
And mostly ours.
But that sounds like a terrible podcast
that we might have to check out.
That's where you're going with the time.
At some point in the future.
Twin beds.
Let's listen to them break down the fourth wall.
I always like when podcasts do that.
It's one of the things that we like to do over here.
Take pride in that.
I'm not sure what happened, Lance.
It seemed like we're going to have Austin Powers, but then it kind of seemed like he was
more like a mom and a partner.
Papa Karnie.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was kind of bounced back and forth between two of them.
I wasn't really sure what was going on there.
Yeah. I was confused, confused identity for sure.
But like maybe being frozen will do that to you.
Yeah. My brain's a little goop and stuff.
You know, there's no laughs.
What do you mean? I'm not.
It's not funny.
All right.
Here's a legit analysis of the Garfield comic, like legitimate, not trying to make jokes
just explaining how good it was.
I enjoy the first panel.
It's like a fun panel of him chasing the mailman.
The joke isn't funny.
It's, I can't tell if the joke is,
oh, it's what you would expect him to say,
and that's what's supposed to be funny about it.
But what else would the answer to that be?
Like, it's not unexpected at all.
Now, if we saw him actually eat the mail man,
that'd be something.
Yeah, if he just burped a package. Yeah, a Netflix sleeve. Ah, there's
the improv. Hoerius. Why don't they write Garfield comics? They're so funny. They came up with
such a great punchline there. Holy shit. The guys legitimately explaining the Garfield
isn't funny. Like, I know. You're just coming to this conclusion now.
You just figured that out now.
So who is this for?
I don't know.
You know what it is?
All these fuckheads who need to be doing a podcast
because they think they're creative
and they think they're funny.
They find whatever fucking angle doesn't exist.
Which by the way, there's multiple Garfield podcasts
I discovered, so maybe it doesn't exist.
But they find just some reason
to talk into a microphone and then they do it
for hundreds of episodes.
So they assume it's working?
They assume they're working.
They're not.
It's not work.
This is my job, the public demands it.
Yeah, I know.
Nobody cares.
Nobody gives a shit.
It's like running into a burning building.
Yeah, sorry.
I'm hung up on time, my friends. You know, it's no different than, you know. Yeah, sorry. I'm hung up on Tom Meyer's.
You know, it's no different than, you know,
police officer running to the scene of a crime
or a firefighter running into a burning building.
It's what I do.
I do.
Assessing Garfield Comics from 1978
is just something that God put me here.
Someone's gotta do it.
I believe God put me here to talk about Garfield Cove Extricks from 1983 and that's why I exist as a person. Financial
Fabulous, man. Was that a fucking find or what? Yeah. I think I'm gonna go on
Drew and Mike next week and talk even more about that because Drew took a liking
to that podcast, which I was excited about. It was a lot to like. I'm gonna wrap things up with this.
Do you have any more thoughts on Garfield?
No.
Do you have any of the airfaces?
No, holy shit.
What in the fuck was that all about?
So that was Hungry Cat Daily.
Make sure to check that out, everybody.
And now it's time for.
Gringe of the week.
Gringe of the week.
This is the part of the show where the listeners send me in a clip from a podcast
that they heard while they're listening to their favorite podcasts and they go,
oh, that's pretty cringe-worthy.
And then I agree with them and play it on the show.
This is from our buddy Adam Thorough, who does nothing but listen to shitty podcasts.
I think more so than I do because he's sending me these on a daily basis.
This is a show called Stoner Girls.
Welcome everybody to Stoner Chicks Podcast.
That's a Stoner Girls, I've been Stoner Chicks.
This is a show called Stoner Chicks.
Whoops, it's even called Stoner Chicks.
I'm gonna do it.
Welcome everybody to Stoner Chicks podcast. How's everyone doing?
That's our podcast. It is. I'm good. I'm going to smoke right now. Has everyone else already
toked up? Yeah I'm baked. Yeah. I'm already a little high. Cool. Well, if you all want to pause and smoke,
then come back to us.
I'm about to rip one.
Nope, that sounded like I was farting.
I'm about to rip one, everyone.
I still have my fart machine here,
so I will make a fart noise.
Aaaaah!
Thank you, Steph.
You're welcome.
You call that a fart?
That's a fart.
Yeah.
Oh, God.
This might, again, stoner checks might be a show we want to check out in a future episode
of WOTP.
It's five girls who are high.
None of them.
How could that be good?
None of them from what you see be
The maybe it's good question. I think everyone's in you see be now
I think if you have a podcast or also a member of you see be is how that works. I have a second
cringe of the week
This is Tarek Nesheed's the Tarek Elite podcast
Call brother. All right. That's a beautiful thing, man.
I love to see black...
Damn.
Oh, that was loud.
What's up?
Who's calling?
What's up?
I got two people here.
Hold on, hold on.
Hold on, hold on.
Hold on, hold on.
Hold on.
Okay, now, who we got here?
This is black Voltron.
I know. I know.
I know.
I know.
I know. God, yeah.
How many folks we got?
Man, the phone.
I hold on.
Let me turn some of these phone lines on.
Yeah.
OK.
All right.
Let me turn some of these phone lines on.
If I haven't worked the phone lines in a minute,
so the phone lines are a little janky.
Let's try this one here.
Hold on one second.
All right.
Hold on. All right. What's up? Who's calling?
I love it. We got to for some reason. We got Elijah. You here?
Yes, sir. You good? Okay. How many goddamn people we got on the phone? I mean, this is the twilight zone. Yeah, that was hell. All out.
We got a bunch of we got a damn party line going on. Shit, man. How many
everybody on the phone state your name? Victor.
Victor. All right. And who else?
Elijah. I'm gonna have happy hang up, man.
I don't know why these phone lines are so janky.
And the FBI must have my phone line started up crazy.
All right.
So what's happened?
Hey, man.
Oh, man.
Yeah, man.
I really got you on this.
I've seen a lot of things.
I've seen a lot of things.
God damn.
Hold on.
This is going to be a lot really bad.
Oh, man.
How many niggas on this damn phone?
Hello? Victor. Victor. Yeah, it's Victor. All right. I can hear you. Victor. That was up. That's amazing.
That's some stuttering John shit, right?
Anyone who's complaining about the length of that clip right now is not understanding what's going on here
It's hard to fail that many times at a row. It's really impressive. Oh, and every time it sounds like he's getting his shit together.
Yeah, it's all right.
Because you hear him, I close it down,
and I'm like, oh, you're done, you're done,
you're done, I know he's there.
Who's here?
I'm gonna be a problem, I'm not.
I wonder why Johnny hasn't gotten that phone system yet.
Because that would be amazing what he does.
I can't wait to hear it.
Anyway, that was from Havall Kurdish from Sweden.
Thank you.
Sent that in, yes.
Thank you, very good find. Yes. Thank you.
Very good find.
All right.
We're going to bring in our buddy soft to join the show.
Soft, are you there, my friend?
Yes, I am.
Can you hear me?
I can hear you.
Can I call you Corey Soft as a weird thing to call us,
somebody?
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's fine.
Like I told you, my name's not hidden,
but when I joined Discord in the internet,
I've just always been soft weekly
and that's what a like membrane and Bob
and everyone calls me.
So it's just kind of stuck, but yeah, Cory is fine.
All right, soft, soft it is.
You wanted to talk about disgusting hawk.
And this is a show starring Jessica Kursin.
This is a show that's on gas digital.
So it's somewhat successful.
There's probably listeners to it.
I guess I would assume.
But well, I have, how'd you find this?
I had the wrong clip.
I listened to the Real-Ass podcast.
I enjoyed Louis J. Gomez. And this was a promo, and I heard it,
and I could not believe it was on gas digital.
Yeah, I was amazed.
I was a little surprised myself.
I guess this woman is a stand-up comedian,
just to get a cursor?
Yes, and I'll preface this right off the start by saying,
it probably helped
her a whole lot that she broke
into stand-up comedy when her
stepbrother Zach Braff had a
huge TV show. Ah, okay. Now it's
starting to make a little bit more
sense. Right, right, right.
All right, yeah, what clip do you
want to start off with there? I
have two that sum up the show, but start with my number 27.
I would love to sir.
Jessica Kerson.
Now, she's not highly attractive.
She's not ugly either.
But that's not why she's funny.
She's not doing, she didn't decide to become funny because she looks a particular way.
It just is.
She finds comfort in that. So if you're
not listening or watching the disgusting Hawk podcast, you're missing out on what the
fuck comedy was supposed to be and supposed to be.
Holy shit, Patrick Michael likes this show. That's the most ringing endorsement you could
ever get, right? That explains it all. That explains it all. Jody B from PoBoy accused me of picking the show because he had mentioned it.
But you know from my conversations, I had mentioned it to you beforehand and
then I texted you back again and said, holy shit Patrick Michael likes this.
No, that's not true. You're only doing this because Patrick Michael told you to. You're lying. You're lying. You're lying. You're lying. You're lying. Now here is a this
will explain why this is a terrible podcast. It's my sum up number two number 31. Okay.
I started a very long time ago and I didn't start with standup. I actually started by doing Vodville, believe it or not.
Okay.
I believe it.
I believe it.
I believe she wasn't a comedian to start off with.
Yes, that makes sense to me.
Right.
And Vodville on a podcast, it makes no sense whatsoever.
But she tries.
She does try.
Now the way this show is formatted, they do a 10 minute
opening where she talks and you know like she was just doing there and then she goes into a bunch
of characters. We'll try and get the 10 minute stuff out of the way and then talk about the
characters for a second. Let's do that. All right. Um, this is her opening number 37 watch how flat this falls.
I was mentored by Sinbad for a while. I actually wore the suits that he wore. Um, and I used to wear those suits on stage.
That was good. You know, I would, uh, I would wear those big blue suits. Uh, They would button all the way around me.
I would wear a lot of bow ties.
I wore bow ties for a while and copper buns.
And I would get a lot of laughs when I wore a copper buns.
Is that a great story?
It's a good start.
So I was listening to an episode where she talks
about how she spilled coffee on herself.
And she says, you know, when you're a fat person, you can't spill stuff on yourself because
people will notice.
I was like, well, yeah, but they also know as if you're fat.
Right.
That's really the main problem.
The coffee state is one thing.
Like we could all get a coffee stand here and there.
But being a fat chick is really the problem here.
Yeah, I have a couple fat related clips.
If you want to, you can play number six and seven right in a row.
One place I really learned to be funny was Fat Camp.
The Fat Kids gave me more candy when I was funny.
That's contraband at Fat Camp, isn't it?
Is she admitting that?
Yeah, that's it.
Well, here's number 29.
It mits how successful she was receiving contraband.
And they would throw Snickers bars at me. So I got extra candy from being funny at fat camp. So that was great.
That was really that was fun. That's how it started. It seems like all her jokes, uh, they start
out as a story like they're going to
go somewhere and then they just
trail off to nothing in the end.
I wrote down a note based on the first
10 minutes of the show that Jessica
Kerson is like Tim Dylan if Tim
Dylan were a woman and not funny,
but then I realized that was redundant.
So I apologize for that analysis.
Do you have more on the first 10
minutes of the show or do you want to get into the characters? Yeah, just a couple
more because I play my number three. Did you know she's Jewish? Maybe I
shouldn't bring up that they were Jewish. I should probably leave the Jewish
stuff out of this opening. Now play my number 42. Jesus, we're skipping around
here. Hold on. Let me get to that page. I was in a Jewish sororid
Beautiful Jewish girl beautiful Jewish girl Jewish people always have someone that fixes things in their houses because we don't know how to do that stuff
Oh, please everyone just remember how delicious
motsapole soup is.
And forgive us.
Maybe I shouldn't bring up that they were Jewish.
I should probably leave the Jewish stuff
out of this opening.
Did you know that the three stooages were all Jewish too?
Yes.
Because they used to beat the shit out of me.
So this reminds me of that sign phone episode,
where his doctor becomes Jewish for the jokes.
She seems like she's pretending to be Jewish just so she could tell Jew jokes. Yeah, yeah, and if she
is Jewish, then she just uses it as her crutch because even though she says, let's not talk
about Jewish, that's all she talks about. I got a Jew joke. You're ready for this one?
Sure. Soft. Two Jews walk into a bar, and then they buy it.
All right.
What else you got, buddy?
All right.
Well, here's one that...
Producer Chris just frowned at me.
Yeah.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
This one, what were you expecting?
Yeah.
This one, because as you know, I sent you a ton of clips,
but this one will explain the
10 minute process.
I think what happens is a gas digital is a, and I got a long clip about gas digital if
I could play that one too, but this one explains that they're probably a big studio, they
have studio A, studio B, and a production studio.
And I think she has limited time to do her opening bit.
Play my number 38. I know it's on the screen, Frank. He just held up a huge sign that said 10 minutes.
It's on the fucking screen. This is a very vulnerable conversation. Show me a sign that says 10 minutes. I'm coming out again. Don't you shame me? You just did what everyone else has done to me my whole life.
Okay, yeah, so I agree with your assessment.
We had rough sat down the show and we talked about when OP
was given a tour of gas digital when he was hanging with
Lewis Jay Gomez.
And there were two recording studios where they record podcasts and I'm sure there's an area where there's production given a tour of gas digital when he was hanging with Louis J. Gomez.
And there were two recording studios where they record podcasts, and I'm sure there's
an area where there's production done.
And I have a feeling that they have funnier people they want to try to get into the room
in 10 minutes, which is why they're letting you know, like can we wrap it up?
There's funny people in the hallway.
Exactly. The rest of her show, if you listen
between the first 10 minutes and then when her characters
come on, you can hear the sound gets quieter.
It was obviously produced elsewhere at a different time.
It's just not of the same quality.
Now, this clip is about 40 seconds long,
but I thought it was funny because
gas digital, I love real-ass podcasts,
I love leads and the skinks.
I think they're very funny, but I think the way they sell
advertising, they got to get so many spots in.
So, Lewis J. Gomez will just bring in anyone
that he knows from the comedy circuit and give them a try.
You know, but this is from within the last year, if you play the name.
Are you saying, hold on a second, are you saying that there's too many shows on gas digital
that maybe they're putting too many podcasts on their network and maybe deluding the quality
based on having way too many podcasts?
Is that what you're trying to say right now, Corey?
Well, I am, I'm just telling you what Lewis J Gomez says, if
you play number 11, listen to all the shows that are getting
dumped.
Fill her up.
You're listening to the gas digital network.
Mouse, read off all of the, uh,
all the shows here.
The shows on the network.
We have, are you?
Are you not granted to see your?
I got what's are you garbage?
They're not here anymore.
OK, believe you me with Michael Bispink won't be here soon.
Rob topics won't be here soon.
Oh my god.
I can't get right with Kurt Metzger.
You know, he had list wrestling.
Cattle's wrestling.
I either safe comedy fight club.
Gone.
Hicest are you hungry?
Society radio.
Do you party? Wish we
can get rid of them. House of hardcore. Likely gone soon. In God free we trust. He
safe. Irish goodbye. Gone. Gone. Likely gone soon. Sorry. The jester. We didn't
tell them yet. He safe. Legion of skanks. No disrespect. Likely gone soon. No
fucking regrets with Rob Flynn likely gone soon no need for
apologies we need black guys yeah they're saying
part of the pogrom no it doesn't Dave Smith part of the
program is this program real-ass podcast that's this sex SDR show the thing is
thing ding ding likely gone soon without a country change one of the co-hosts lost the famous one Zach Amiko's Midnight Spook show which I've been on and I'm saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm saying.
I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying.
I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying.
I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying.
I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying.
I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm
saying. I'm not saying that's what I'm saying. I'm not saying that she'll be another mention as gone. Isn't that amazing?
No, how many shows were just lewaced out?
No, the least she'd go as is joking.
It's a disease of comedian.
You know that, right?
You listen to your show.
You know he's joking about this.
He wouldn't be saying I would tell him to be up with her, Don.
That's got to joke.
Corey.
Okay, so do you want to get into some of their care? I do. That's got a joke. Corey.
Okay, so do you want to get into some of their characters? I do and I want to start!
I'm taking this one.
I have just a couple of clips from this show.
But this character is so fucking annoying and not funny.
I don't know why she would think this would be something good to bring to her podcast.
Just go to your Delta.com
Mandy!
Hey, quality lab
tells the Delta 8 gummies and vapes
that will get you hay! That's yojelta.com
and if you use the promo code
GAS, you're gonna get 25% off.
Oh my god, I'm 25!
Once more, that's promo good gas for 25%
I'm a little bit more like, yo, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don, don't, don't, don, don, don't, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, don, her signature characters. Oh, fuck me. And I thought that was as annoying as a show could get.
And then she brings out a horse girl.
Have been looking for no horses for me.
So I thought that I would show you guys some pictures of them.
And we could get to know them together.
And then we could choose them.
So let's see some of the horror films.
Ah, this one's really pretty.
God damn.
Who, I'd rather listen to Garfield podcasts
to be out of swathick,
because it's just not as annoying.
Can we go back to it?
Should we?
Yeah.
Well, I guess some of them were clips here on Garfield.
It's very funny.
Well, it's very funny because at Garfield podcasts,
you mentioned they were improv guys and if you listen to a lot of her these character segments
What they are is all right?
This is her character Mandy and she'll tell who's ever with her
This is going to be your part and then there's no script then they just go improv and try and rip it and yes, and it's terrible
You can see it it turns out
and they just go improv and try and rip it. And as you can see, it turns out terrible.
You can check out number four, this is more with Mandy.
I think it's good to incorporate some of my dog training
skills with my podcast tutoring skills.
So he's a dog trainer that also tutors podcasting.
It's ridiculous and it falls flat.
And remember, Patrick Michael thinks
this is the definition of comedy.
So let's keep that in mind.
The story checks out.
Yeah.
Do you have any more examples of these improv skits?
All right, let's try number 23, Meet Matt.
Yeah, what's up?
It's back.
Everyone in this podcast studio sucks besides me. I show this is a guy that she plays, Matt.
Yeah, so it's her attempt at mimicking like a bro comedy type.
Sure, yeah, that's how guys talk. Everyone sucks except for me.
Well, actually, Dignation says that that every episode never mind. I take that back
You can hit 24 and 25 just so people can get an example of how cool Matt is
fuck Mandy
She's a fucking horror
I hate her fucking voice
Dr. Crane wants me to fuck her, I know it!
All right, here's the other one.
Vivian is an old bitch!
I don't even think she's Jewish!
Stutes making some points.
Oh God.
All right, now just encouraging this.
This is not a network. This is not one of the bigger networks.
That's what I cannot believe, Carl.
It kind of taints everything that gas digital does.
Ralph, what do you do it, buddy?
You got to reach out to my friend Ralph.
Now we got to find out about Vivian, number 32.
All right.
Hello, everyone.
It's Vivian Eisenstein.
I'm a Jew.
OK, Vivian's a Jew.
Right, that's, but isn't that like every Jewish girl plays
old Jewish lady
character it sounds uh stereotypical is that the term we're looking for it's
typical while the fun story might say hackneyed
no shit hackneyed is the right word yeah now number 39 this is a long clip but
this is what she thinks is funny for Vivian to do.
And this goes on for like a minute and a half,
so just play a little bit and you'll get the idea.
The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round,
round and round, the wheels on the bus go round and round
all through the town.
Ha, ha, ha.
The babies on the
butch go wow wow. All right, I think we
got the point holy shit. Right, but that
goes down for like a minute and a
half. Yeah. Oh no, she she definitely
commits to the bit. That's the one thing
I discovered on this. Just as I was
turning the volume down as fast as I
could as I'm listening to this.
I'm going, oh, she's going to stop at any minute now.
She knows the socks.
Nope.
Nope.
She's into it.
All right.
Now, this one, and then we can be done with this show because I know I sent you a ton
of clips.
I just wanted to be sure I was ready wherever this went.
But if you notice all those characters, they have one thing in common.
Besides being, she also has another character.
I should tell you real quick, Dr. Crane.
I didn't pull any of that.
That's fine.
That's a 49-year-old female white psychologist with,
how does that make you feel questions and that kind of BS.
You know what I mean?
Exactly what you'd expect.
Sure.
But if you notice, she doesn't have any Puerto Rican characters
or black characters or anything like that.
So, uh, play my number 26.
And I used to do a lot of things.
I did not do blackface.
I never did blackface.
So I just want to say that.
I want to say it again.
I never did blackface. Well, then you'll that I want to say it again I never did blackface
well then you'll never be the prime minister of Canada will you well I tend to think someone
that started out in vaudeville and protest that much probably did blackface there's
just not any video footage of it that's interesting I've never repeated over and over
again that I've never done blackface just because no one has ever accused me of it.
Yeah, that's a good point.
The fact that she does protest too much me things.
Is that the test?
Sure, yeah, yeah.
We love it.
Oh boy.
All right.
So interesting.
Thank you for bringing this to our attention.
Disgusting Hawk, it's called
and it is un-listenable.
Hey, yeah, Cory, do you want to hang out and talk about our friend, Petty Seacups?
Oh, you know I do.
Don't tell me you don't like my show.
Don't tell me you don't like my show.
Don't tell me.
Don't tell me you I don't tell you. Don't tell me.
You don't like my show.
Or any of my shows.
Don't tell me.
I don't tell you.
I don't tell you.
Because that's absurd.
So he dropped a show, but he's doing this thing where he's putting out episodes, and then
he takes them away, and then he brings them back again.
And I don't know if that has to do with the Patreon or if he's just more on.
And so this episode of the briefcase, it was originally called Dr. Who.
Now it's called Dr. Who Cares.
Is that what you're talking about?
Yes, that just came up on my feed this morning.
Okay, so I was listening to this a couple of days ago
and he starts off by talking about
how he finally logged into a smule account
for the first time in a long time.
Now of course, smule is where we've been getting
these clips of him doing karaoke
and it's been endlessly entertaining
and I can't get enough of it.
And I've always hoped that nothing would happen
to that account. I happen to pop on to my karaoke app.
It's just an app. You can sing along with people.
You can do your own versions of karaoke songs and what have you.
And I've been doing it for years.
Almost as soon as the app came out, I was like, that's a fucking awesome awesome idea and it's fun as shit to see how well you could sing a cover of anything
It's awesome. It is I totally agree with everything he just said fun as shit see how well you can see a cover or something totally awesome
I love it the problem is
Someone's leaving comments on there that he doesn't like
But I got comments and I've been getting comments from this
particular person. For some reason, he's like a 65 year old man.
Apparently, he's a doctor to just like myself. And he has a
podcast. But when you're well passed middle aged, are you so
lonely in your day to day life that you had to seek me out on a
karaoke app to leave a comment? Because that's petty as fuck and you're a grown-up,
aren't you? So what Peter Michael is saying is that Dr. Steve, we all know and love here,
is going on smule and leaving comments that for the first time, I believe this is the first time
ever, PM admits it's bothering him. But the reason I bring this up is because it's kind of
bothering me because the dude had, he had left comments on do you party saying
things like this is the best show ever. Obviously in a mocking sense of a tone but
that same guy seeked me out and had to go through a catalog because I don't
know the last time I covered Ricky Martin. He's not my go-to but when I go to him
of course I knock it out of the park. But at some point, he went through the entire catalog, looked through the songs,
found the song, and left a comment on there just to make sure that he knew that that was the one he listened to,
but he, oh shit! Oh shit!
It's so fun when you find out your popularity accidentally.
Yes it is, as it is.
I was just wondering if you realized that almost no sleepier shit. He had no idea that was going on.
So unfortunately he's seeing these comments from Dr. Steve and he deleted his account. It's gone.
You cannot find these over 1,100 songs. This was content for years for WATP wiped out the face of the earth.
It was a year long Christmas.
Yes.
It was gonna be our next music special for Crescent.
No, I gotta use my music again.
I know.
Play Patrick Michael for that.
So this is him describing the comments he got from Dr. Steve.
The shit's weak as fuck, man.
Shit's weak as fuck, man.
So of course, what do I do?
Cory I reach out to dr. Steve
Cuz I'm like, what's going on here? Yeah, this isn't week as fuck
We just fuck why did they know like is he is dr. Steve really going on?
Trowing you, Patrick, my is this real? I don't know so I had a phone call conversation with him this morning and
I'll play that for you now
Hello, Dr. Steve. Oh, hey, man. Let me get off
me get off speaker
So I sent you a quick clip yesterday or the day before where Patrick Michael was talking about a
65 year old MD who was commenting on his smule account and
he was very upset about this and he was calling whoever this person is out.
And I had a feeling that maybe he was talking about you.
So I asked you, were you commenting on a smule account and I'll let you take it from there.
No, absolutely not. I've never, I've heard you talk about snow or snow
or whatever the hell it is.
And, but I don't know if it's an app or a website.
I vaguely know that's where he does karaoke,
but I have never been on that website.
Okay, I listen.
I absolutely lighthearted, psychoanalysis of someone that were all a fan of on a goofy roast show,
absolutely going on and trolling somebody when they're just having fun, I would never do that.
And I don't think there's a thing that will ever be doing that anywhere.
Okay, good. So maybe someone was impersonating you and pretending to be
down your sleeve. I would love for somebody to go there see if they could find these trolling
comments and see if it's not easy.
I think that he certainly heard the,
the Siphone analysis, he took a sense at it, but he didn't want to address it directly,
so he transferred all of that to somehow
me trolling him on his stool like that.
That's my hypothesis.
Well, you might be right about that
because he's also taken down his
meal account. So if there are
comments on there from a doctor,
Steve, we wouldn't know.
It's all gone. Everything's gone.
But his his words were very specific.
65 year old check failed serious XM
show and OK, I'll give him that.
Although I'm the longest product show.
Wait, he didn't say series XM, I thought he said you had a podcast.
Did he say series XM?
Yeah, where did I see that?
It's in the description of the episode.
Okay, interesting.
So 65 year old was failed series, show, and something else.
I can't remember that, you know, I'm just a low-life, you know, idiot, whatever, trolling
him for no reason, which I did not do.
Now I listen, I am offering for him to come on my show.
I know you guys have done that.
I have a reputation for not graphing on people.
Rich Boss was on the second or third show I did
in actually in the series, second to them studios.
And he blew us off.
He was supposed to come in and talk about sobriety
and he didn't show up.
Right near the end of the show, he called in,
and all the people with me were like,
get him on the phone and then hang up on him.
Now I talked to him for 10 minutes. I couldn't do it. You know I couldn't hang up on Brooklyn Blowhard when Danny told me to my very first show.
I just said Danny I can't do done that for him to defend himself if you'd like to come on my show i'll even put up
250 bucks that trapeque can hold on
and i'm gonna put him or shit on him in any way or any other neutral party
we can both trust
uh... then he can have the money what's it if a trapeque act now so i think this
what you should do i think you should Venmo trade peacock 300 bucks and then after Patrick does your show he sends Patrick to 50
Do you like how spending your money for you right now?
Yeah, thank you. Yeah, now I told you 300
Anyway, but we could figure it out we could figure it out a way that somebody that we both trust
He trust Anthony coomy. I trust figure it out. We can figure it out. Somebody that we both trust.
He trusts Anthony Cooomy.
I trust Anthony Cooomy.
And maybe we could rope Anthony.
Nobody trusts Anthony Cooomy.
What are you talking about?
All right.
So you want him to come on weird medicine,
which is on serious exam every single week.
And I just did your show.
I had a blast talking with you.
You want Patrick Michael to come on that.
Oh, good. I'm looking forward to that.
So you want Patrick Michael to come on that. Oh good I'm looking forward to that. So you want Pat and Michael to come on weird medicine and you're offering him money to do so.
Absolutely. Well I'm offering him money if I ambush him or shit on him. Oh I see. So you're saying
if you do fuck with them then you'll pay him. Right it's guaranteed.
Wait a second. So you're giving trade peakcoc to fifty you think he's going to give
it back to you
well case i was about example of that
yeah but we got to find somebody close up okay
alright fair enough
uh...
and then if i grab on him he just has to say that i craft on me can have them
and you're saying and i'm looking at your text messages to me you're saying
your show gets fifty thousand plus listeners on serious X out. I have been told that my people at serious XM
I
I find it hard to believe but let's just say it's 10,000
50,000 is not hard to believe a lot of people. I mean they have what 33 million subscribers or something
Yeah, yeah, true
I know that when we did the Saturday night virus back when we started i mean they have what thirty three million subscribers or something yeah i
i know that when we did the
the thirty-night virus back when we started back to two thousand
by whatever
whatever two thousand five two thousand
uh... we had a hundred fifty thousand letters to that first of all that's just
what
that's i don't know how serious that kind of judges that
that these numbers have been kind of throughout their
i probably have trouble for you saying that.
Oh, it's okay.
You're saying on who are these podcasts?
Who's gonna hear this?
It doesn't matter.
It's fine.
All right.
So, Dr. Steve, I'm gonna wrap this up.
But we want to put it out there.
Dr. Steve did not troll Patrick Michael on smule.
His theory is that Patrick heard our analysis from last week's episode.
Was a little butt hurt about it.
And decided to comment and rip on Dr. Steve the only way he knows how but pretending a
scenario that doesn't exist happened and you're saying come on the show I like
that I thought it makes sense to me yeah and how many times did we say we love
that guy and you know and even at the end we were like we kind of felt bad for
him although that's probably an insult to.
When I said was never change I said you're perfect the way you are we love you for who you are.
Right.
I know how could you take offense to that?
If someone was talking about me either like it by the way Carl never changed it but all right cool.
They were on the same page here.
That's one of the things we like about it because we said that and it's still just lately
matters.
I know.
That's why he's the most.
All right.
Well, the offer is out there.
Weird medicine, a show that would be fanned.
If you got Patrick Michael on Weird Medicine, Dick Maston and I'd be so pissed.
Like, what's that?
Steve was able to do it.
What the fuck?
All right, buddy.
We'll have a great vacation.
I have a little reputation for not shitting on me. That's true. That's the difference. That's a good point. All right, buddy. Well, have a great vacation. A little reputation for not sitting on me. That's true. That's the difference.
That's a good point. All right.
Have a great vacation. Thanks for calling in.
So Dr. Steve was in his car driving
to his vacation spot with his kid,
his 15 year old kid listening to the briefcase.
It's just blowing up my phone.
But do you want to just have a quick conversation?
Let's just talk about it.
That was really funny. But anyway, so it's out there.
Dattrace D thinks that Patrick Michael heard
our psycho analysis episode that we put out last week.
And he got very upset.
So he pretended that it was a smule comment.
And that Dattace D was on their posting about,
do you party?
It is fucking live in La Vida locale, whatever the fuck out
that is, is M.O.
I mean, yeah, of course.
Which I found to be a very dubious claim to begin with
because I don't know Dr. Steve, but just listening to him,
he wouldn't troll people on an app.
You know, I, he's also a very busy man.
I mean, he's a practicing physician.
He has his own practice and staff and people
and he also does a show for serious
and he's listening to who are these podcasts,
not stop, it's a busy guy.
It's got to like go, what's up?
It's got priorities.
Priorities are not spiel comments.
So that's that, by the way, yes, I was on Weird Medicine.
I guess that's gonna air next week, he's on.
And that's an interesting conversation.
I pretty much talk about my take on the vaccines
for an hour and a half.
So if you want to hear my take on COVID-19
and the media lying to us about everything in the vaccine,
you can hear that on weird medicine with Dr. Steve.
Any who, what else did you pick up on
from this episode of the briefcase, Corey?
Well, I want to go back to one from,
I think it was the July second
episode just because we were talking about Spiel and this is relevant. You're an
instrumental man, right? You guys have tons of musicians and dancers and
nobody sings, correct? That's correct. We play music without a singer. It's called
instrumental music. I don't know why it's such a crazy fucking concept everybody.
Well, what the fuck's your problem?
Like you've never heard of instrument on music.
Really? This is a new concept to you?
Anyway, yes.
Well, it may be crazier than you think.
Play my number 11.
You know, because I've seen many of my vocal instrumentals,
my vocal shit. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha vocalist or metals right so it is crazier than you think what was he trying to say
there on a company just just how well his stuff is doing so I have an interesting clip
on here where he talks about how good he is at and I quote metal vocaling I got 260 followers on Do You Party 300 plus on briefcase.
Oh you fuck them with.
Because I don't see it.
Alright, that's big time status.
Alright, even with the vocal shit.
Yeah, sure, talk shit about my cover of the Ricky Martin or some other sappy song,
because how I see it, the way I look at it,
is a guy like me who is very good at the metal vocaling
and all that shit, unclean screams and growls
and blah, blah, blah, hearing me attempt
and it isn't attempt, that's what's fucked up.
Like some dude posted WTF
You know his picture was the V for vendetta mask like oh
oh
But now he posted WTF to a
karaoke song like what a cool guy you must be you must be going out and hanging out with friends
Oh, ah because I would a guarantee if you did anything karaoke wise you'd be terrible. I just love the
idea that somebody puts out their art on the internet and someone is writing
stuff to you. Yeah. Yeah.
Fuck. I had the same clip. I'm glad you played it. I love that. I love that.
So funny. I'll skip the one from the July
second episode. We'll talk about the new one because I have a few we can run through fairly quick.
Okay. Number 32 is Patrick Michael telling us how good he is at podcasting. Hey, do you know
what an original thought is? It's when you can conjure up an idea
or a perspective that you've had about any specific topic at any point. Nope. That's
not what an original thought is. Right. And isn't he famous for reading the wiki pages on his
True Crime podcast? He also copies everything that he does.
Like the nine minute podcast is because of the podcast
called the 10 minute podcast.
And he's out here going, I'm an original.
I do a true crime show.
I'm an original.
No, Patrick, you're everything you do.
I can't find your YouTube channel Bad Brain Studios
because there was a band called Bad Brains.
Like everything you do is a copy.
You moron.
Carl, I've had that same problem,
and I love Bad Brains, so it's kind of nice to look for
his shit and then find something that's actually
entertaining, right?
I noticed that.
Well, it's funny because he talks about how he won't even,
he could do a show like we do, where he pulls clips
of our podcast and goofs on us, but he won't.
And I couldn't, I mean, I have all the means necessary to sit here and listen to any of these dudes podcasts
and talk about how funny they sound or how bad their show is or how boring it is or how, whatever.
I could do that, but understand you don't mean enough to me So waste my time
He could do it. We don't waste his time. No keep in mind. This is about the seventh episode in five weeks
It's dedicated just to talking about me and dick master said there's another entire episode
I didn't even pull clips from that's just about how dick master is fat
I think he thinks veto is dick or so. I don't know what he thinks
But he went on and on about how dick wouldn't be able to sit down in a chair actually
I think I have this one joke
This is just ridiculous. I have that clip as well. Yeah, this is him talking about how fat we are
That we can't sit in gamer chairs and then he comes up with just a gem. I'm not saying I'm a little guy, but dear God
I would hate to be anything you sit in
Especially the toilet
AKA your mother's mouth.
What?
I don't know.
I was thinking when I heard that joke that he was going back, that he was going to come
all over yours and dick faces.
And you know, now you know, you're shitting in your mom's mouth.
It's terrible, fall flat humor.
Well, speaking of his greatest hits, you know,
you mentioned coming on our faces, which is why that he loves. He also drops this little
gem. But yeah, I didn't want to do this episode. I didn't want to do this episode today.
I have to go to you because I don't need you guys to listen to this show. That would be
like any better saying he doesn't want to sell it in arena and then opening with a live
into yellow lead better into better man
It's like no, no, no, you obviously want people to enjoy what you're doing. You're dropping all the greatest hits
I don't even want to do a show today, but I just I have to because fat dick master said and Roy are talking shit about me again
I have one that just I found funny number 27
I want to be a fly on the wall.
When who are these places sits down to record an episode?
I want to see what it looks like.
Does he have printed out notes that he wrote on Word?
No, they're in my notes app on my computer.
I'm staring at that.
It's I have multiple screens.
I don't use a phone to record my pie.
Peter, you're welcome to come over.
Body up.
I'll pay for you to come over and hang out.
Does as we record a podcast.
Got lots of headphones.
I thought it was, I played headphones
so you can wear, you can wear multiple one during the show.
Ha, ha, ha.
I thought it was funny because, uh, yeah,
we pulled dozens of clips in the show's two hours long,
and we have notes, you know, you know, being on the Drew and Mike show,
Drew has a whole sheep of notes,
Dick Masterson has tons of notes.
Yeah, we prepare.
That's what we're trying to do is put on a good show.
I spend more time propping for my show
than he's ever spent recording on,
which is not that impressive.
I cannot wait to set it.
Especially the nine minute parking. No, they just said that out loud.
Well, yeah, no, shit.
Obviously, it's like, oh, Carl sent me a sentence.
Carl sent you said that, play my number 10.
This goes back to the July 2nd show.
Watch the timer now.
I sit here and I look at my timer as I'm recording.
And just count down the minutes, filling the space with. OK, count down the minutes, filling the space with...
Okay, yeah, count down the minutes.
That's like an Opie thing.
Opie's like, yeah, we gotta do another hour, man.
Did an hour on the sidewalk with my buddy Carl and Vic.
We did an hour.
No, you're just wasting time.
You're wasting people's time.
And you know how he says that for the people that want he said at one time that if we
want to hear him bash you and dick we would have to pay for the Patreon but he's been doing
it regularly on the free stuff.
But number 17 shows you how much effort he puts into the Patreon content.
We're definitely more on in the first 20 minutes of the episode and by the time you guys get to the Patreon portion of the podcast
I have already lost all control and things are definitely going downhill.
Alright so since you brought that up I also listened to this episode that was an hour long. There was an hour long episode of the briefcase, which he never does.
But for some reason, he gets to the part
where he's going to end the show and just doesn't,
and then dares himself to keep going
at a stream of conscious shameless.
It's really some amazing stuff.
I had to reduce the number of clips
because I was ready to play the entire show for everybody
because it's that amazing.
It was good.
You heard this one too, then.
Yes, yes, and it was good. It's incredible. And
well, let's get to the where he normally would wrap up. We're at like the 18 minute
mark. And he's got some great jokes. Oh, yeah, that joke about my dad. The one where I
said, you know, sometimes I go out to my father's grave and I just stand there reminiscing how the fuck I'm gonna get him in there
Because you know he's still alive
I just have I didn't say the grave was at a cemetery keep up folks
All right, I'm very good at this
very good at this
Sometimes so good that it's it's like when I'm doing a freestyle, right?
When when you're really free styling you're letting it come out of your head. It's it's like the
thoughts are there. You know the lines, the bars are gonna calm the words are they're gonna make
themselves happen. But at the same time when you go back and you listen to it and you're like,
oh that did make sense. How are you not surprised? How are you not more proud of the work?
Which is like holy shit, I was just rambling on and turns out I had a point
Doesn't not happen as often as you'd like, but it's there. He's happy with himself when he actually makes a point
Yeah, I wouldn't be if I were him as well
All right, so I're after that every day. We're after that with a great fucking joke where it's like, keep up guys, I'm, uh, what
year's I had of you with my thinking.
He has his false ending.
And I just have to say, I forgot.
Fuck.
I'm pretty sure you probably thought I was just gonna
Play the outro
And the episode right there because it would have been good. I even thought about it Well, no, you're the one who thought you were gonna play the outro right there that you forgot and then he decides to just like talk for 40 more minutes and
I love it when Patrick Michael starts telling me things that he doesn't know about. Oh, I have a bunch of those clips. Oh, okay, good. Let me start it
with us one. I don't know how you guys found yourself here. I don't know why you're
listening. I don't know what's in your mind. I would love to listen to a show where Patrick Michael just said tells me what he doesn't
know.
Here are the things I don't know about.
What do you got on this?
Here number 14 is he's talking about Dick stealing
Compton Bitt and then he says he's never listened to Compton.
You know what I mean?
Or steel Compton Bitts.
I've never even listened to Compton.
But he knows they're stealing the Bitts.
Well, people must be feeding in this information because he talks about Dick Masterson and
Lankh, but exclaims that he's never listened to the show, doesn't know who he is.
So he must be getting this from somewhere, I assume, I don't know.
Maybe he's reading Dick Masterson's sub-ride at which if you do that, you'll figure out really quickly and that the guy sucks.
Well, well, Carl, he does not pay attention to your show either, but he is definitely listening right now.
Number three, I've seen that being sent to the discord channel that you guys hang out
in like a bunch of fucking 12 year olds.
Okay.
Yeah.
So I do know that his partner and crime there, hipstar is in our discord,
trying to get people all
riled up. Hey guys, a team Patrick Michael. I was like, no, you're not shut up.
It's not working. But he's got us figured out, man. It's got us all figured out.
Yeah. Here's one I wanted to play for you, too. This is kind of along the lines, but this was about your appearance in Florida number 13
That was their first experience seeing coral go read the comments people don't like that guy. He's a piece of shit
That's hilarious go read the comments. He's a piece of shit
All right, I guess all I did was shake hands and have drinks with people about yeah, I must be real piece of shit. All right, I guess all I did was shake hands and have drinks with people
about yeah, I must be a real piece of shit. Here I did punk someone in the eye with my teeth.
So there was the thing I commented that I could see why they'd be upset. This one is from
the most recent episode that just dropped, but I thought it was funny because he's not giving you your due. He's trying to say it's
In spite of you not because of you number 40. Okay
What are you gonna make my career? You're gonna set my podcast off. You're gonna build my Patreon for me
Nah
Trying
Yes, that's exactly what you did
Yeah, I mean, it's all I can do is just tell people about it.
I get, you know, you can, and I'll tell you this, Patrick,
you can bring a horse to water, but you can't force him to drink.
It's not fish to water.
He's been saying this every fucking podcast.
Oh, you guys are like fish to water.
No, that's not the saying.
No.
Carl, you brought him so much money.
He's refusing it.
He refused your $10 donation a month.
He refused my $10 donation a month.
You have built his Patreon and he's saying you're not going to do it.
But clearly you have.
Well, I like it when he contradicts himself, but lately he's starting to realize
that he's contributing himself.
He's becoming self-aware Because you guys still keep coming,
which is just, hey, if you stop listening dude,
I'll stop making it, that's what it is.
All right, I changed it up.
A few episodes ago I said, I'm still gonna do it
even if you didn't listen.
Well, fact of the matter is, you don't listen,
I'm outta here, it's over.
So he realizes, he's like, oh shit, that's right,
I did say that, I don't care, I'm just gonna do the show.
And I want you to listen, and then I,
well, actually if no one's listening, I'm not gonna do the show and I want you to listen and then I actually if no one's listening
I'm not gonna do the show and then be kind of stupid if I did do the show and all was listening
So he's starting to figure out that he doesn't make any fucking sense
Which is nice. I will make this shit myself. I don't care if you fucking like it dude and leave your comments, but also grow up
So he doesn't care if we like it, but he won't do it if we're not listening
And you can leave comments, but also grow up
It's a real head scratcher
Right, I think my number 37 kind of piggybacks along with that
So stop pretending that talking shit about me is gonna get any good things out of that
Okay, no one's pretending we enjoy Patrick Michael, don't we? We do.
I mean, I listen to him unironically.
I enjoy his show.
As long as he's not talking about partying, I enjoy his show.
Or fast food restaurants.
Yeah, I like, I like, I like, do you party.
He's letting us know how successful he has become.
You know how much I talk about my podcast almost never. Almost never.
Not because I don't enjoy it, not because I'm not great at it and love it.
And it's not successful. This is very much successful. Trust me.
I have soundproof padding on my walls, bitch. Okay.
That's how successful I am at podcast.
Amazing. I got an AKG microphone in my hand.
I got Baringer headphones on.
Who you fucking with?
He never talks about his podcast.
Who would he talk to his podcast?
Talk to him about his podcast.
Is Carly still in the mix?
I don't know.
It's a good question.
I've heard they brought up in a while.
Well, he's read done in office.
So maybe he doesn't see Carly anymore.
And I think when he says read done in office, so maybe he doesn't see Carly anymore. And I think when he says read it at office,
he means cleared out some space in the closet.
I think that's what he means.
And he now he's putting together a very high quality
podcast.
As you know, I mean, Cory, you had to pull these clips.
Did you happen to know is that you needed to boost the audio
quite a bit in order for us to be able to hear them?
Oh, wait, yes, I did. And if you play my number four, you'll see one I put on here that I did not boost so you can...
Everyone can see the difference in the audio.
Dude, are you that dumb?
Yes. This is what his show sounds like. It's impossible to hear if you're showering or vacuuming or in a
light jog or wearing corduroy. It's impossible to hear. Whether there's any
noise in the background, but he goes on to explain how high quality a show
is. I mean, do you party and the briefcase and pretty much every other show that I do is very high quality podcast.
Ah, yeah.
I mean, that sounds fair.
So somebody looked up the microphone. He was just bragging about his AKG dynamic handheld microphone.
It is $10 like a Tarsatter.
It is, uh, it is a dynamic handheld microphone. It is $10 like a tarsetter. It is a it is a bargain basement microphone. And Carol, you've been a musician for a long time.
You know, um, barringer headphones aren't necessarily
no, I'm not the one you're looking for. Uh, oh, this is interesting. The shit,
I'm getting back to the shit. the Patrick Michael doesn't know about.
I was like, are you a person on Earth?
How is, how do you not know this?
There's a college radio, little studio on a campus, and I just walked by it.
And for some reason, I looked at it extra hard, and I remember looking at it hard.
Because I didn't even know that that was a thing you could go and do at your school.
Right, you see the college radio show on like a movie, perhaps?
But it doesn't register that, oh yeah, I could have fucking just, I could have,
even if it wasn't the major that you're going to the classes for,
going to the college for, you could still be on the radio show.
Whether or not you were the radio host or just a part of it, you could learn that. He didn't know that there's college radio stations that students work at.
He didn't know that. He saw it in a movie once, but he thought it was made up, you know,
like Star Wars. I just thought it was all fantasy. Yeah. When I went to college, the radio station
was in the all-class room in the student center, so everyone could see it.
We all knew we had.
And there's posters for it everywhere.
They want the students to listen to the radio station
from the college.
I mean, not that this guy would know what a college campus
would look like, but I'm just saying,
how does he not know that?
It's pretty well-known thing.
Well, in the most recent episode, Carl,
he said he was a doctor of science.
Correct.
Just like Dr. Steve.
He did say that.
So, I suspected he got a post graduate degree in science and he would have understood
that.
All right.
This is him talking about why he's so good at what he does.
I've actually tried some lip and mouth movements before I podcast to try and help the words
come out a little easier.
God, that sounded stupid.
I'm going to cut that.
I got to take that out.
That's a weird thing to make.
So this is part of his stream of conscious episode.
We just said shit and he's like, why did I say that?
What am I talking about?
This is another example of that.
Was this the episode I was gonna do the Italian thing?
I can't even recognize it.
It's a little late to ask now,
cause also who am I asking?
I don't even remember what I was just saying anyway,
so fuck it, back to the thing I found.
He's not good at podcasting over 20 minutes.
He gets very lost.
And that's because he doesn't have notes he doesn't
ever he notes and he podcasts for so long that this happens oh shit you know it's funny is the
computer just went to the black screen because I've been talking so long without touching it what
does that mean what does that mean does that mean the computers, I think that's, we're good, right? It's enough.
It's a screensaver.
And you can actually determine the amount of time it takes for the
monitor to turn off.
You can go in there and decide the number of minutes you want it to be.
They go by with an activity before it turns off because I don't know why that
happened. Probably haunted.
I like his take though.
That's like his producer. Like, yeah, we're good. That's the light in the back. You got five
more minutes. All right. Let's wrap it up. Do you think he realizes that he could literally
press any key on his keyboard and the screen would pop back on? Oh, wizardry. It doesn't
sound like you realize. It's magic. Kind of of that happened I got to tell you though man one thing I never say because I don't believe this to be true is that
Podcasting has gotten easier in fact
I've made it much harder on myself because I used to just do one episode
You know we'd review one podcast and move on and now we're doing tons of podcasts
But Patrick Michael very different but goddamn it what I would have done to have some real quality recordings of
Any of the early podcast. I don't have any of them certainly not quality because they weren't like I had no
fucking idea what I was doing guys and now it's so easy like I'm I don't even have to think
unless I'm changing microphones I don't have to think about the quality. Yeah, I just plug it in.
Plug the mic in, turn it on, put the headphones on.
Ta-da.
I will say I've been having a problem
with the headphone connection, which is always,
you know, it's because they're $5 headphones, right?
Yeah.
Classic.
Classic Shamus, you know.
Oh, self-aware Patrick Michael coming through.
He knows that we're goofing on now. It's a little bit weird
Yeah, I feel it. Yeah, it's a little black mirror. It's like oh shit. They know he knows that we're talking about his headphones
Well, you said self-aware my number 33
I think that he gives away something about himself. I think it's some self-reflection
Have a life experience outside of your internet.
Yeah, I know it's funny when he pretends
that he's got a life and he puts out six podcasts a day.
Well, and then he says,
I never even talk about podcasting
because you only tell him your talk
is when you're podcasting.
That's why, and you do talk about it.
Why your podcast?
It's all you talk about.
And he's able to do things
without even thinking about them now because it's so easy for him.
I think about the people that listen.
And the guy who said he couldn't hear the podcast when he's in the shower.
And I make adjustments, dude.
Without you in the thinking about it, I'm like, well, what about that guy?
I gotta turn it up.
There's the guy.
The one guy said, without even thinking about it, I make adjustments for the guy.
And I was thinking about how I need to fix that.
Does he understand what thinking about it means?
Does he understand what adjustments mean?
Because I don't think the show's got it anymore.
No, it hasn't gotten better.
It hasn't gotten better.
By the way, I love it when he has his thoughts
all pulled together and he knows what he's gonna talk about
and he just goes for it.
Why, you guys are, I mean.
All right, here's a fun I sell right here
that I think we'll stay on the board
because this is funny.
Talk about retarded.
Talk about retarded.
That's pretty good.
We are. That's pretty good. I have a lot of
retard drops that one will get added to the mix for sure. Now, I want you all to understand
that he's getting a bigger and bigger audience, especially now that Dick Masterson is featuring him
quite a bit on his show. But I will say I'm only getting more powerful as we go in podcasting. And
I feel like it's because most of the people that enjoy what I'm doing, they enjoy it say I'm only getting more powerful as we go in podcasting and I feel like it's because
Most of the people that enjoy what I'm doing they enjoy it because I'm not one of these dudes. I'm not one of these guys that's trying to mention
Richard or Roy or any of these other assholes on the computer
To get popular. All right. He's getting more powerful as a podcaster and it's because
He doesn't do the show format that I do and he doesn't do what Dick
Meshson does because I'm Roy and Dick is Ricky. But the only reason why anyone knows who he is or listens to his show is because of Dick
Masherson and myself. So I'm not sure that he's correct about that. Although he is getting more powerful. I will give him that.
And he wants to be brought up, when people talk about
people who do podcasts by themselves,
he wants to be brought up in the same breath as Bill Burr.
I want to be on a level with this goddamn podcast
because I do it by myself that they start mentioning me
when they mention people that do podcasts alone.
Because what, are they giving all the clout to Bill Burr?
Not all of it, but it's got a pretty popular show.
I don't know.
I wouldn't say like, who are the guys
who can do a show by themselves?
Well, Bill Burr, uh, Patty C. Cups,
it wouldn't be my number two.
No, no.
And that goes back to the clip we played earlier,
is like, uh, you guys goes back to the clip we played earlier is like a you guys are building my career
Yes way more people know who he is because of the Dixho and WATP
If I didn't bookmark his anchor.fm pages
I wouldn't be able to find them
They're not indexed by Google like Like, you can't find his pages.
Everyone of his podcasts is a rip off of another podcast show.
And every time I try to Google,
the name of his show, it doesn't show up on the first page.
There's no way, I don't want to discover this guy.
And even Brian had to pull the clip,
and even Brian's one point was like,
I have more podcasts you even know about.
Like, why?
Why wouldn't you promote your other podcast?
I've tried to listen to you. Yeah, you don't bury them in the yard. I mean, there's meant to be found.
It's like how Vinnie feels about me never talking about the creep off, but I do bring up the creep off from time to time. Yeah. You know, I'm not bragging about it, but I do bring it out.
I know he's listening, so I got a crazy suggestion. Okay. Maybe cut down 60 podcasts to six. Oh, come on. Focus on those. No, no, no, no. I keep doing what you're doing Patrick Michael don't ever change. You're doing everything correctly.
I love it. Carol Carol will he has picked up a trick. Okay. Um, my my number 41.
My my number 41
Make it a review go review the show that one or last that'll stick there
All right rather than leaving a comment on a karaoke app
Just review the show go leave a five-star review say whatever you need to say and then get a life
Oh work on that do you think he listens to your review suggestions? I mean, that's obviously a takeoff. Yeah, that's obviously takeoff. I leave a five-star review
and shit on us in the town. He never heard my show. He doesn't know what my voice sounds
like. He doesn't know. He saw me on Chip Chipper Sim, but only for 60 seconds. But his concern
is touching. He wants you to get a life He does Just podcast watch it DVD
So he comes up with a joke at the end of this hour long show and I have a feeling this is not the last time
We're gonna hear this because he's very proud of himself actually comes up with this
I wonder if anybody's ever made the joke that I kind of look like it
Which I do
But I do purposeful things to avoid it. Like not putting
on cloud makeup. Got you. That's truly the easiest way to not look like it when you
don't wear the makeup, right? Like you just avoid it. It's pretty much the easiest way.
I have a feeling that that's going to work way to do a stand-up routine. He was pretty proud of that way.
Oh, he cracked himself.
Oh, he was like, he would have type-edged Opie on that.
He's gonna kill him the next time he's on Killtony.
He's got it now.
Then it tries to do at the end of the show, you know, Chucky that, uh,
Dahl, that's's uh, possessed by demons
He has a Chuckie bit that he wants to do
Chuckie, what'd you like to try and sway us and let's you into the pale brigade?
Yeah, for sure dude
Sorry, I'm Steve oh
So how the fuck it fucked up the whole bit. I can't do a chucky.
I really didn't even know where to go.
Like, what is it? West Craven's voice? I don't know.
I love this guy because you can tell he talks to himself a lot.
Yeah.
This is not abnormal for him to be doing voices and cracking himself up.
This is kind of his thing.
Yeah, and then self-doubting himself going, was that any good? Yeah. Do I need work on that? I'm not gonna be a bad guy. I'm not gonna be a bad guy. I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy.
I'm not gonna be a bad guy. I'm not gonna be a bad guy. I'm not gonna be a bad guy. out here, Kari. There's a couple if you want to wrap it fire, um, just him talking shit to you guys,
you and Dick, which might be fun for a second.
They'll only take a second, um, 16.
And that goes for, you know, the Dick show and Carl and all those guys.
They can't have that many skills.
Okay. 21.
Does he know I'm a mediocre guitarist?
Does he know about that?
The Dick show can suck a dick.
Good one.
No bad, all right.
What else?
22.
There's a lot of shitty shows out there. Who are these podcasts?
He's never heard it, but it sucks. Okay, yep.
Yeah. I think that's all the rapid fire. I know I overloaded you with clips today,
but I wanted to be prepared.
I believe the tux that I sent to Corey was
80 fucking clips, fuck!
Specifically when I sat to them,
because I warned them early in the week,
not to send me too many clips.
And did he listen to me, producer Chris?
Well, he sent you 88, so that's cool.
I wonder, you know, something that I think producing
a podcast is easy. And then I see how hard your job is when people show up with 80 fucking clips
you're like dude I do want to go to bed at some point tonight. Can we not? But it does
make me more powerful. Alright, I just wanted to say I'm sorry to Chris because I thought
Carl was putting them on the board. Sorry about that Chris. Don't you know that everyone
does my job for me?
I don't do anything.
Patrick Michael's made this very clear.
He has a new side off that I'm going to use as our new side off.
What's with the dancing around the shit?
I stink.
You hate me.
Great.
Goodbye.
That's good.
I love it.
Yeah.
So that's on the board now.
All right.
Mr. Soft Weekly, thank you so much
for coming on the show and joining us today.
Thank you for bringing Disgusting Hawk,
which was not on my radar, just a person.
Wow, was that annoying?
Yeah, my pleasure.
Can I mention a few plugs?
There's one thing I didn't want to tell you.
Yes, please do.
Is the cringe of the week with Philly Fanatics.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that was our little group of guys, you know us from the Jerry
Vanfield call.
Yes, correct.
Yes.
That was Manbrain Dave and Boomer Bob and Andrew, who was on the
Jerry call in Content Kings.
When you look for the Patreon, that's the server that Dave runs.
And we all hang out there and talk shit. Why did you guys get connected with Philly Phenatic,
that guy has zero talent? Boomer Bob was doing a show with him, but after that, John like
nixed it all and scrubbed Bob from all the things. So he's also an asshole.
Yeah, yeah, interesting.
So he's not good at podcasting.
He's be brags about his podcasting, which is insane.
He says that I suck at it.
And he also was a dick.
Yes, okay.
Those are all true.
Can't you like Duncan, and he likes Duncan donuts. Well, I would have led with that one probably rather than wrap it up with that one, but
okay.
Yeah.
Well, I know he's listening and it'll piss him off.
So where can people find your show?
I do.
Someone needs to say it.
That's a show Dave helps me out with.
That's everywhere you can get podcasts and Val and I Val was also on the
jury call. We do another show called significant straight podcast and that's where we handicap a U.F.C.
fights and I'll be busy doing that all night tonight watching the fights that we put our show out
for in the week. So far, we're winning. We're not Vegas big yet, but we're doing well,
trying to get into a new market.
So you mean like when crippled Jesus gets into the octagon,
is that what you mean by handicap?
MMA fights?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
I put, I put him in a plus 10 million.
I wasn't sure what that meant.
Very good.
Very good.
Very good, sir.
Well, thank you so much for joining us. We appreciate you coming on the show.
I appreciate you having me. I wouldn't like to say before I go that this is my second time
because of the Jerry call, but the first time I was like, I'm so excited to be on your show
and you're like, let's not get carried away. This is a bonus episode. That definitely checks out. That's funny. You know,
I don't know if I've heard the Jerry College. You ever sent that to me? Is it worth listening to
you or clipping? Yeah, it is. I'll send it to you. I should have the whole call. Send it to me.
And shout out to Manbrane Dave, who's up at 4 a.m. in Australia to listen to the show. Thanks.
In content, King, if anyone wants to come by,
membrane Dave, me, Val, Andrew, Boomer Bob,
we're all there.
Talking shit.
It's a very fun discord server.
Not to be confused with Boomer guy.
Boomer Bob's a different person.
Yes.
All right.
Thanks, buddy.
Thank you.
Yeah, be good.
So I think the reason why he brought 80 clips
was so his plug wouldn't seem so long.
In comparison. What's going on with our friend, Cedric Chad, producer Chris?
Oh man, what is him going on?
It's him going on with this fucking guy.
Alright, so he's talking about how he wanted Howie Mandel to do a blurb for his book.
So he reached out to Howie Mandel's manager a blurb for his book. So he reached out to how he mandell's manager
who blew him off.
And I love how he meant, Dell.
And I've hung out with how he meant, Dell.
And I've had a billion conversations with how he meant, Dell.
But I was emailing his assistant who I love.
His name is Richie.
And I was saying, could how we do a blurb for my book?
And then Richie said to me, well, you know,
you know, how he's really busy with AGT, America's Got Talent.
So I go, okay, I get it.
You know, and then what happens,
AGT ends, this season ends.
And then I email, I'll reach you again.
I go, well, the book, I still have time if you want.
You know, yes, how he, if he wants to,
oh, he's just so busy now, he swamped.
And I just wrote back the rich, I go twitching.
And we both been in this business way too long to have to like bullshit each other.
If how he doesn't want to do it, just say it doesn't want to do it. It's not a big deal.
You know, I'm not going to lose sleep over it. I got plenty of other people. Jay Leno,
Larry, the cable guy, Rain Wilson, I got plenty other people doing it. Stephen Weber, I mean,
it's okay. Jen, when the guy says he's too busy,
it means he doesn't want to do it.
It's just another way of saying that.
Basically, this is how it works out.
How a man does a very busy man.
He's producing a lot of shows.
He's doing guest appearances.
He's doing a ton of shit.
And when he says he's very busy right now,
he can't do a blurb on your book.
You don't reach back out again
When the project is over assuming that now he's bored and go well now will he do it?
They already said no. That's what no means not just in Hollywood just in life. I'm busy
You don't want to do it. It's what that means. I'm busy and I still say yes to shit that I want to do
This is him on beer on the balcony.
He's got a comedian on.
She says, you should come up to my show tonight.
This is how John blows off his gas.
Now remember, he just said, just tell me the truth.
I can take it.
Just tell me you don't want to go.
This is John saying he's not going to go
to the person who's taking the time to talk to 10 people
on beer on the balcony and asking John,
hey, why don't you come up to my show tonight?
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I'm just coming up there tonight.
Like I said, I'll be there at 8 o'clock.
We can hang out.
I got to see because my kids are going to New York tomorrow.
And I'm trying to hook up with my two youngest.
Do you want any kids?
No, I don't.
I don't have any kids.
I have nieces.
All right, because my daughter is 20 and look, I know that when I was in my 20s,
I didn't really want to hang out with, you know, I didn't want to hang out with my parents.
But I so think I'm like a cool stat in the world.
Yeah.
For me, it's like, I don't know about, you know, I'm busy. I'm packing.
I'm like, well, come on, I want to just take a body and before you go to New York, because they're gonna go away for two weeks.
I just got back from New York. So, you know, yeah.
So I might be seeing them hopefully tonight.
Sorry, you literally says, I can't come to your show tonight. I want to go see my daughter who told me she doesn't want to see me.
And what's great is she's going to New York.
Do you know why she's going to New York?
In fact, all of his kids are because their mom has just got me remarried.
Susanne is remarried now.
And that's why they were all going to New York, not at the time when their father was in New
York, but they were going to visit their mother in New York for her wedding.
I just love everything about this guy's life. It just keeps getting sadder and funnier at the same time.
Remember when we predicted that he wouldn't be purchasing a Tesla
because it didn't make any fucking sense that he would do that?
I hope that Bezos, oh this is by the way, again,
our buddy, Richard O'Hita is on the show.
And he's, this guy is the way again our buddy Richard O'Hita is on the show and he's he's this guy
It's like always flipping out about something
He's off the charts. I hope that Bezos and friggin the other assholes Elon Musk out they crash into the moon
Yeah
In fact, you know, I'm not buying a Tesla anymore. I changed my mind
Yeah screw. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, I'm not buying a Tesla anymore. I changed my mind. Yeah, screw him. Yeah, I just, yeah, you know, I'm no fan of Elon Musk.
You.
He just said he wants me to fly to the moon. Are you a fan of Elon Musk?
He just said, so John uses this as an excuse.
I'm not buying a Tesla because I don't like Elon Musk.
No, you're not buying a Tesla because you can't afford one
and you can't charge it because you're going to the apartment complex, John.
That's why you're not buying a time slot.
The thing that he said, it's already been purchased and it's on its way.
And now he's such a fucking liar.
Stop lying on the internet.
You're going to get caught every fucking time you moron.
But the ultimate thing that he did this past week is in the middle of his show.
He took a shit.
He took a shit in the middle of his show, he took a shit. He took a shit in the middle of his show.
No, he's talking about his former attorney, Michael
Avonotti, who by the way is going to prison.
And John's upset about that.
And then that turns into him having to take a poop.
Also breaking news, my attorney, Michael Avonati has been sentenced to two and a half years
in prison for extortion.
Now I happen to like Mr. Avinati and he got me out of this whole, you know, secret service
thing.
So it's unfortunate he couldn't get himself out of that same thing.
So as I'm waiting for how to come in here, I just got to do something real quick.
So I'm going to just play you something and then I'll be right back
because I'm having a few kind of, not to get too into it.
I'm having some stomach problems,
some stomach issues right now.
So let me just play it as, you know,
and I'll be right back.
All right.
I just got to take care of this.
Okay.
So just bear with me.
Put it on full screen.
I'll be right back.
Shit.
If only we can hear shit noises in the background.
You know, with me, put it on full screen. I'll be right back. Shit.
If only we could hear shit noises in the background, you know,
all right, thanks for that little intermission.
I don't know. Let me just do this.
He actually sounds lighter.
All right. All right. Let me bring in my buddy now.
The great house box. How are you? I'm good. How are you?
I'm okay. I had to, I had to go to my intermission. I had some, I had some stomach.
PMI, PMI, I don't need to know. Honest to God. None of my, none of my God, damn,
I mean, nobody's stopping you from keeping a journal and publishing it when you're old
of all these incidents. I just don't think I've been drinking.
Live. I've been drinking slim fast.
And I think I don't think it's working well with my system.
Oh, it's the slim fast is the problem.
Not the 18 course lights every single day.
The slim fast is the reason why I take a shit in the middle of a show.
And people in the discord are part of this out.
Michael Evinati got 2 1,5 years because he was trying to extort 30 million dollars out of Nike.
He was let off the hook.
He should have been going away for much longer than that.
And here's John going, he's a great guy.
I wish he could have gotten out of that.
He's a criminal.
He broke the line.
He's a fucking criminal.
What are you talking about?
Oh, I hope he doesn't sue me when he gets out.
Okay, moving, God.
He's not begging anybody to come on his show.
Chris.
He never does.
He does ask them constantly,
but that's not what back again.
No.
I'm pretty sure this clip is about no cashler.
I'm not begging anybody to do this show.
They don't want to do this show.
Don't do this show.
I really don't care.
I'm not going to beg you.
Lower a colston thanks for the two bucks. You know, I've already experienced that with people
that won't mention, you know, where they I constantly ask them to come on and they give me some
bullshit excuses. All right, I'm not doing that anymore. I don't give a shit. Okay, you know,
I want to do a show?
Keep on lying, tell me that you're working on something whatever. Just say you don't want to do a show. Okay, that's it.
Don't give me any bullshit.
No, Kassler does not want to do your show, John. He already quit. He's writing a book. Remember it's a very important book
that I said right about. Trump. Oh wait, that doesn't matter anymore.
God's, I'm shit,. How are you really going on?
Stuttering John show. Oh fuck fuck you. God damn it
I believe that for a second because of your ties to the Howard Stern show
I thought maybe you'd be able to get in on that that'd be amazing if you could
Yes, please get on there, God so
I'm sure you could too. He's desperate for Gus.
I've seen a lot of clips this week of him talking about how he's having a hard time
nelling down guests, which is why Hellsberg's is on the show.
Where should he does on the show?
It's just the same shit over and over again.
And he talks about, this is a crazy clip right here.
John explains, and this is something that I don't know who else would do this in broadcasting. He went to a legendary restaurant with a date, and Jay Leno called
him. I've been told I use the term humble bragging correctly. This is just bragging. This is just
straight out bragging. Before we get into Trump, I do want to talk about a few things.
I had a nice conversation with my old boss, Jay Leno called me yesterday while I believe
it was so weird because I'm on a date at the Smokehouse, which is a place in Burbank.
It's a legendary place.
It's like a Musso in France. It's like, I mean,
it's like, it's been there since God knows when. And I used to go there with a bunch of
the tonight show, a producers and the stage manager and where else. That's where I get
the call from Jay. We talked about some things I don't want to talk about, but it was a very nice
conversation.
So this was a call back.
John had reached out to Jay because Richard O'Heed is going to be in LA to be on the Bill
Mars show.
And John wanted to bring his body to Jay's garage to show him all the cars and stuff.
So, oh, yeah, I know Jay, I can get a sin over there.
So Jay called John back.
And this amazing conversation they had about whatever probably setting up a time for him to show up that over there and
He's like, oh yeah, what are the chances this guy speaks celebrity's call me while Mahatcha taking up my tender date
To some restaurant that's been there forever. What a fucking weird fucking conversation to have
out of podcasts and he goes out to explain that his date was great because she was hotter
than she looked in the photos, which to me means he'll never see her again.
And he's talking to that other woman, the comedian that he had on beer and the balcony
and he's talking about online dating.
So I'm on Tinder Engine Bumble.
They're cracking up at that.
Now I have an awesome t-shirt idea for John.
I'm going to give this to him for free.
It just says I'm on Tinder Engine Bumble.
It has a picture of John's face underneath it.
That would be an amazing t-shirt.
Who wouldn't wear that shirt?
John, take that one for free,
someone on your merch store.
I'm on Tinder Engine Bumble.
I would wear that shirt.
I would totally wear that shirt.
All right, so as you know,
John lost his lawsuit, but he's not gonna give up.. But so I am going to further this lawsuit judge, Crottie apparently doesn't know what
the alley was talking about.
He didn't read all the case law on similar cases that are equal to mine.
And he just decided to like a lot of judges go with the big corporation.
So you know, I have no love for Judge Crowdy,
and I don't think that he did the right thing.
Now, granted, you know, it doesn't matter.
I'm sure my lawyer would never say something like that,
but hey, I'm not a lawyer,
and I don't have any love for the bloke.
Well, calling out a judge is probably not gonna
help your case, I would imagine.
I think that the next judge who hears your case might know this guy or know of him and
kind of think you're a douchebag.
We're saying, at the last second he calls him a bloke.
What?
What?
I gotta go into the pub and beat my bloke.
Yeah.
On my mates over at the pub.
British Tuttering John's the funniest ROTC vet of all the time.
So I don't understand the judge just goes with a major corporation like all judges do
is like no, no, he cited the reason why you lost the case.
He explained to you that there's copy right law that's going to be more important than
your stupid celebrity, whatever the fuck you think it is.
California wasn't looking out the window at what car you drove in
I'm gonna go with that guy. Yeah, I'm prettier. I used the fuck. He's like this judge is a fucking moron John
Do you think that judge knows more about law than you do? I'm just possible, right? It's possible
Okay, let's talk about super chats
He's talking to his guest.
Now I was watching the video of this.
Here's a guy who's a political figure in some regard.
I mean, everyone who's on a show is in the politics,
whether they are a politician or just into political talk.
Imagine being the guest and hearing the guy who's interviewing you,
go off on a rent like this.
The guy just looks like confused and lost.
Like what's going on right now?
Like it's so funny to me Glenn because like I'll get these loser trolls who like, oh
John asked for super chats.
It's like, you know, I'm doing a free show here.
I'm booking great guests just, you know, like yourself.
And you know, so
it's nice to get paid a little bit for doing all this hard work. And then I get crap
for just getting like a $5 super chat or asking for a, you know, someone to become a patron
member. Yet Donald Trump is grifting people for the likes of $300, $ 400 million and these same trolls support Donald Trump
and don't have a problem with that.
You know what I mean?
Where does he make these connections?
What does Trump have anything to do with super chats?
And he's always shoe horning in to every guest.
Would you help me with these trolls?
Do you ever get this?
Yeah, you get this.
Can you believe all these trolls?
And they're always like, oh yeah, no,
I don't know, I don't know what you're talking about.
And how does he know the trolls support Trump? Oh, no, he just makes these fucking
He's like you guys go play it up my super chance meanwhile base. Oh, so the pain any taxes like wait what the fuck you talk?
How are you connecting these dots John here's five bucks?
Dollar a minute
Super Fuck off. Jesus. A dollar a minute. Shut up. Five minutes. Super mute.
Super.
That should be a new product.
There's another freebie, John.
Another freebie.
Where's that t-shirt?
Unplug your mic.
And I promise that we'll promote you for that.
Holy shit.
Produced a crest.
What have we done today?
We have done it all. We have done it all.
We've done it all.
We talked about Hungry Cat Daily,
the Garfield podcast hosted by
hilarious UCB and improv comedians.
Yeah, UCB alumni.
Oh yeah, we talked about disgusting rock
with Jessica Kerson.
We talked about the briefcase.
Doctor Steve called in today.
Indeed.
Stuttering John was on the docket.
So you know what that means.
It's time for everybody's favorite part of the show,
which we have not played a lot lately.
It is.
The teaser.
The teaser.
The teaser. The teaser. The teaser. The teaser. It is
This is the part of the show we play a clip from the podcast we'll be reviewing on next week's W 80 PD people excited about it subscribe to the show get it wherever you get podcasts
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Here's a clip of the show we'll be reviewing next week.
Thank you, Mal.
Whoa, whoa.
So that sounds real.
That sounds really bad, right?
Brother T's!
That's what you call it.
Alright, brother T's.
Thank you, Mal.
Whoa, whoa.
So that sounds real.
That sounds really bad, right?
I would say bad is just, oh, felt like you came in hot. It's a bad of my ear. It's a bit
Okay, that was that was weird. Yeah, that was a bit in your face
It's been a while Steve. It's been a while so maybe we're trying to get back in that. I don't know did to scheme of things
This is again as we've talked about nearly every week
This is, again, as we've talked about nearly every week, APS, three point, whatever this is, is slowly being taken over by both cricket corner and Evelyn's playdrom.
And the mixer is close enough to the edge of the table, and she is now tall enough where
little hands reach up and knobs are turned and faders are adjusted. So there's
a very good chance that the terrible audio quality is brought to you by Evelyn today.
This is the Steve and Kyle podcast, a suggestion from Jeremy. He writes, may I introduce you
to the Steve and Kyle podcast. Steve is a current producer and
consensus most hated personality on free beer and hot wings and Kyle is a former intern
who was called Weiner 2 on air who co-hosted with Eric Zane in the early days of the show
on WBBL. I listen to Stephen Kyle mostly just to fill time it's really bad like Patrick
Michael level bad you'll'll hate it. I promise
So that's the show we're reviewing on next week's W. Oh my god. I can't talk. I gotta go
I gotta go use the the bathroom. Please
I gotta go take a shit
Please Joseph next week. It might be the episode we find out once for all who are these podcasts sleep well every pony
Okay great show good job everybody great job everyone One, one, one.
This dude's fucking corny.
Don't say's good attention.
You know, who are these podcasts?
I don't know.
I don't get it.
It makes no sense
They were back with watermelon white cloth
It's the secret to my success
I want to be honest with everybody water mountain is the best flavor
All right, let's get Casey up here. She's ready. Yay
Casey, how's he doing at doing today? I don't know how do I sound you sound alright
Alright, all right Casey was a little bit jealous the Vic got co-hosting duties last week. Yeah, I was
The next time Vinnie's on his deathbed will get you
deathbed will get you out. Next one.
Did you have a heart attack?
I don't know if he's gonna make it to be honest with you.
And she's crazy.
If you hear the creep off next week
and it's me and producer Chris,
you'll know what happened.
Oh, no.
But the funny thing is that Chris is just gonna do
a Vinnie Impression,
where each time that it never happened.
What?
Is he gonna wear a fat suit?
Yeah, he's gonna wear a fat suit.
And do the hot cuck-cuck-cuck-cuck-c-c-car-lock. Can you fat suit? Yeah, he's gonna wear a fat suit.. First one, Warning by Dangerous Jeff.
Imagine if someone mashed up all of the greatest movies, music, TV, and comedy all together.
Picture like top gun, meets Titanic, meets the Beatles, meets Seinfeld, meets Eddie Murphy, Delirious.
Now throw all of that away because this podcast like the opposite of all those things.
If you enjoy listening to a mush mouth, a literate dummy cackling at his own jokes for an hour,
then this show is totally your jam.
It's like mustard colored baby poop before your ears.
It's pretty good.
It's got a five star.
Five stars.
Five stars.
All right.
Nice. All right, next one. 5 stars. 5 stars. Alright. Nice.
Alright, next one.
Hate cast.
If you love to hate hate cast, then this show is not for you.
Most people hate hate cast, and that's not even, and that's even more true with this.
The carol guy doesn't understand nuance or what is funny.
Hmm. I'm not even sure what hate cast are. He doesn't understand nuance or what is funny.
I'm not even sure what hate casts are. Are you familiar with those?
No, but I hate them.
Let me tell.
Yeah.
That's a five-star review.
Oh, wow.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, that was weird.
Okay, I'll take it.
Yeah, we made it clear, but I wouldn't even meant by that.
Thank you, sir or ma'am or non-binary person.
It's a, it's a, by store ex-math you.
So I'm assuming a man, I don't know.
All right, let's keep it going.
Overall good by Kyla Rossi,
but that one guy has got to stop yelling
and talking over people.
I think I'm that one guy.
Yeah.
How many stars do you think that was?
Three.
Yeah, it was three.
Wow, that's amazing.
I'm gonna say three also.
Wow.
You can't do that.
Are you cheating?
Holy shit, I'm killing it right now.
Amazing.
Amazing.
Alright, last one.
Baiters will be Baiters by Jetta Jay.
These boys obviously peeps in high school,
how patheticly sad of a life.
That was Patrick Michael.
Yeah.
That was a one-star view.
Yeah, okay.
We peeped in high school.
If someone would have come to me in high school
and said you peaked,
I'd definitely want to kill myself.
Yeah.
You're gonna have to say that.
I definitely want to opt myself. I'm going'm gonna find a rope. I definitely would have opted myself.
I'm like, I'm gonna ban playing weezer coffers.
I hope I haven't peaked.
Yeah, I was like loitering in a Marriott high school.
You know you're gonna be able to play weed covers.
Disappointing.
Sorry.
Wait, what were you doing in high school?
Casey?
Ah, loitering in a Marriott.
I grew up on a really small beach island.
So I just broke into a
maria and used their pool all the time and so we detourists.
Really?
And in the pool?
Yeah.
Would your shirt get wet?
I wouldn't be wearing a shirt.
Okay.
Interesting.
Is there photographic evidence of any of this?
You want to see photos of me in high school with my tits out?
Is that what you're trying to say, Carl?
In not so many words, unless creepily, yes.
I want to put it on my Patreon and promote it.
It's doing research.
What's so weird about that?
I don't know, because I was like 17, 16.
Let's not do that then.
Disadvile, disadvile, disadvile.
Okay, disadvile. Letadvile, disadvile. Okay, disadvile.
Let's listen to some voicemails.
Vicks out here, but this guy has a theory about why Vick is marrying the guy who was fat in high school.
Hey, Carl.
I just listened to the latest episode where you got cucked by Shulie for quote a family emergency.
I thought that was pretty funny,
but the real reason I'm calling is because during
the voicemail segment, we learn that apparently
big fianc had used to be a bit of a fatty.
You wonder that these guys who used to be fat
always end up putting the weight back on,
especially after getting married, you know,
once a fatty, always a fatty.
But I'm wondering if maybe you're looking at it wrong,
what if that's part of her plan?
Didn't she mention that her mom fattened up her Japanese stepdad,
so you wouldn't cheat on her?
I wonder if that's what's going on.
I don't know, just a thought.
Maybe we could get the fiancée to call him to the show to clarify.
Anyway, talk to you later.
I did give this person no. It's a little long. Could have spoke faster.
Left out the shoely thing and then be getting.
It's gonna get us a tight 40 seconds.
Good boys, good delivery. Yeah.
So that's interesting. Can we get Vix Fiance to call into the show?
I would entertain that.
What's that, Casey?
I would love to hear from him.
I want to know what's going through his mind.
I'm so curious.
Just curious.
Yeah, we're all very curious about this.
Interesting.
All right.
All right, there's a guy who wants some advice.
Hey, Carl. I don't really have any goofs and gaps for you. Actually, it's just a kind of
a genuine voicemail kind of asking your advice. I know you're a marketing guy. You know,
what's your advice for someone wanting to break into the marketing field. I got in the associates and business and technology.
He's kind of a weird shitty degree.
I know you were a marketing professional.
You had your own company.
What do you look for on a resume?
Do you recommend any of the digital marketing
certifications, like Google Analytics or anything?
Just a genuine, genuinely looking for some
advice here, you know.
So, yeah, if you could call me back and go to the bachelor's, you know, I mean, what the
fuck do I do to break into marketing?
I just genuine question, dude, I'm not sure if you can play this on the podcast, it's not
that entertaining, not that funny.
So, maybe other people have the same question, man.
I mean, marketing is a death field,
where just they fuck it is AI gonna take over, you know?
Uh, what are your thoughts, man?
Let me know.
And call me back.
Is AI gonna take over? It's not trucking.
It's not like Andy's profession
that is definitely going away.
No, don't go into fucking my advice.
It's don't go into marketing.
What a boring career.
Do you really want to have a boring career
staring at a fucking Google ads all day long?
No, that's a terrible idea.
Oh, you're cool.
Don't do that, sir.
Don't do that.
You'd be better off working in an Olive Garden.
Like, that would be a better career for you.
I was kind of unlimited breadsticks is more interesting
than digital marketing. I can promise promise you that do not do that
they're all i just want to get into the death pool while i thought
i am confidently betting
uh... fucking i don't know i'm confident we betting
ten dollars
to your patreon
or whatever the like the second lowest
uh... here is i haven't looked at it in a while
that perfect like a little murder suicide you at the chicago live show second lowest here is I haven't looked at it in a while that Patrick Michael will murder
suicide you at the Chicago live show. I'm pretty sure that the guarantee at this point
are a comment. Patrick Michael will murder suicide me. I don't think so.
Patrick, I can't afford it. I don't think he likes to be out in public. I think he's afraid
of the outside world. I don't think he goes to be out in public. I think he's afraid of the outside world. I don't think he goes with it.
Narcissism thing.
Oh, that too. Right. Yeah, yeah, he wouldn't kill himself.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, what does kids do without their dad? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha coming out of the closet. Let's have it, mom. Let's go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Your father was involved in a very important murder suicide.
We need to honor him.
He was really looking forward to it.
Produced your Chris, you know for a fact, because you've
known me for a long time, that I turn people
onto the banned wean.
Yeah.
It's something that I do.
I'm a convert.
Yes. Carl, you's something that I do. I'm a convert. Yes.
Carl, you son of a bitch.
It keeps bitching about wean.
So I listen to wean and I like it a lot.
Now I'm a wean guy.
Carl, do you fucking did to me?
You keep the shit.
Fuck you, Carl.
Call me back.
Yeah, he's got your number.
And he's got a booginish tattoo. Wow.
Yeah.
That's commitment.
That is commitment.
I turn people on the ween.
It's what I do.
You want to know what my skills are in life.
I am a mediocre guitarist and I turn people on the ween.
Those are my skills in life.
Amazing.
Oh, so Shulie was supposed to be on the show last week.
I was out in Vegas and I saw him perform stand up and chatted with him. my skills in life. Amazing. Oh, so Shule was supposed to be on the show last week.
I was out in Vegas and I saw him perform stand up
and chatted with him for a while at his show,
which was weird because he had been chatting
with someone who he thought was me
right before that and the guy never said like,
who do you think I am?
He just went along with it.
Shule was like, hey, Colin, great to see you. I'll see you tomorrow went along with it. Shoey was like, hey, Kyle, man, great to see you.
I'll see you tomorrow, we're gonna podcast together.
Guys, like, yeah, yeah, cool.
I see you sharp with your teeth.
It's so funny.
It's funny.
Crazy, too.
I go up to it and I'm like,
Shoey, what's up, buddy?
It's a big thing.
Oh, you're, yeah, it's a guy,
I'm just talking to a guy,
that was Carl.
We're talking about events.
So that was a weirdo.
It was your brother.
He had a talk to me twice.
This is a no egg. Anyway. He had to talk to me twice This is a dog anyway
You just found the one guy with club feet there. Yeah, whoa, whoa, whoa
The guy had a deviant septum, but he didn't have club feet
I would never try to insult the other man
Short and sweet enough with a fucking truly cock riding is
Baguette enough of the fucking truly cock riding is pathetic that it
that that that that that was both short and sweet i will give it to you
that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that
that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that thaters can't stop sucking down. Was that why you need the straw, Carl?
Anyway, get Dr. Steve to go host and don't call me back.
They put the straw in the cocktail, sir.
It's not that I asked for it.
Is it paper straw?
There's paper straws.
So Casey.
I can hate paper straws.
We're at a place called Carnival Court.
It's one of my favorite places in the world.
There is this band playing there called the Whipits
that are amazing.
And we're there, it's outside next to Harris.
And we're watching this band
it's 110 degrees outside.
They're blowing air conditioning on us outside.
I can't think of a more wasteful thing
you could possibly do in the world
than blow air conditioning at people in desert heat.
And then they can't really pay for straw for your cocktail.
God, fucking me. You pay for straws. It's the worst.
The town over that I go to sometimes for like errands.
They banned paper or they banned plastic straws.
So every time we go eat lunch there it's like fucking paper straws.
Every time it makes me so fucking mad. They're so stupid and useless.
Well, Casey, what are you drinking? One of those ridiculous frozen beverages that you need
to straw for? What do you have, Boomer? What's your problem?
Yeah, I'm right. I'm such a fucking Boomer. I'm just straw-doing my soda guide.
Last voicemail, again, for Vic. Casey, you got to come on the show more often. People
are only talking about Victor
and the voicemail segment these days.
Yeah.
All right.
Show call me last week.
Carl and crew, I've just heard the fucking news.
Oh my God.
Vic, my bow vine queen, it's your greatest descent here.
I can't believe you're being snapped by some fucking chump.
Oh my God.
What the fuck?
What am I gonna do with this cow print wedding dress now?
Jesus Christ. Oh, Vic, my dumb voice, little fucking mole. No. Oh, well, I guess I'll wait this fucking thing out.
Don't thought out any kids. I might have said this. That's pretty good advice. This guy wants to be
a big second house. I don't think I would understand anything he said.
Yeah, well, it's because you're a racist.
Yeah, I'm very racist, he ends Australian.
Yeah, I know it.
Well, maybe someday we'll all get to marry Vic, you know?
That's my hope for it's my hope for W2P.
We don't really see people come in when they're going to story.
Yeah, so we all get to marry Vic in the future.
Let's just hold on to a journey.
Right.
Producer Chris, thank you so much for stepping in for Vinny today.
Anything you want to plug, my friend?
We did the live show plug already, right?
W-A-T-P live.com for your tickets.
We're all going to be there.
Yeah. Kasey's going to make it, right? Not gonna make it. What?
Why not?
If you buy my ticket, I'll go.
I will.
If you bought my ticket, I'll go.
How much could it be?
Well, according to Tucker Dixon, it's like 26280 round trip.
That's like rounding down to zero.
There's nothing.
I agree, but to dirt farmers, it's a lot of money.
That's a lot of dirt.
I'm not taking tickets to the nothing. I agree, but to dirt farmers, it's a lot of money. That's a lot of dirt.
I'm not thinking you can get tickets to Chicago for like 80 bucks. That's my
threshold. When I'm gonna go for just two days, three days. You know, you'd be
better off looking for gold and dirt. I think you'd make more money than what
you do. I like putting your money in carl. I think you'd make more money than what you do. No, I make plenty of money in Carl.
I just don't like to spend it wastefully.
That's how you save money by not
exorbitantly buying.
Are you a financial feminist?
You should have your own show.
I'm not a financial feminist.
I'm not going to see WETP as Chicago.
And bring your own show. I'm not a financial feminist becauseETP in Chicago. And bring your own straw.
A number of financial spenders, because I actually am good with money.
No, you're terrible with money. You're supposed to spend it to go see things that you enjoy.
That's the point of it.
That's why you make money to live a life that you enjoy.
I'm going to have my own fucking show now.
How to spend money with Carl Hemberger.
That's what I was on. How much spend money with Carl hamburger?
I was a lot of time I got one. I spent some money on my plane ticket to Chicago.
Wow.
Wow.
She hasn't given me any photos of her from high school.
And yet, I'm supposed to buy her a plate ticket.
Does she got it out?
Put on the wheel of consequences.
That's an idea.
That's an idea.
That's an idea. All right, very good. Casey, thanks
so much for coming on. Oh, yeah, no problem. Oh, by the way, Carl, how many nude photos
of your fans have you gotten? Well, does do what T-shirts count? No. Then zero. Yeah, I'm going in three if you include it Vic
Okay, so
Trucker Andy I know
Well, I girls sent me her tits a long time ago and then I got I've gotten some other nudes from a very beautiful fan named Mel shout out to Mel
Really? Why is Casey getting all the hot nudes?
What do I gotta do to get hot nudes around here?
Hello, star of the show.
Hello.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know.
What congratulations.
Thanks.
It's very impressive.
Mm-hmm.
It is very impressive.
It's like Casey's just wanted to brag at the case is just one of the bragg at the end.
I did, that's why I brought up.
All right, well, that's awesome.
Good for you.
Kasey is, by the way, bisexual,
and if she will share
Nudes with you, right, Kasey?
Yeah, if you're a hot girl,
I'll share Nudes with you.
Beautiful.
Or Vic.
If you're a hot girl,
or a vegetable, you're a hot girl or a vac, you'll share your hot girl or your vac.
It's getting so mean.
Bye Casey.
Bye.
What's with the dancing around the ship?
I stink.
You hate me.
Great.