Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep370 - National League Town
Episode Date: December 22, 2022This week we explore the world of Jeff Hysen, the man so devoid of humor that he podcasts with Tom Myers on purpose. Jeff is a lot of things, a lawyer, a Mets fan, a left-wing zealot, but no one will ...ever accuse him of being funny. After we get some hot takes on the New York Mets with Mets fan Christian Bladt, we break down Hysen's stand up with Vinnie Paulino. Then we check out the longest Cringe of the Week ever, Stuttering John's interview with Doug Goodstein, Chad Zumock getting clowned on Misery Loves Company, Opie embarrassing himself, and guitar playing potato. https://thecreepoff.com/ @ChristianDMZ Tickets for DabbleCon – http://watplive.com/ Support us, get bonus episodes, Vic pics, and watch live every Saturday and most Wednesdays: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Maybe kind of weird hanging out with the pizza guy.
Epic show!
Pizza guy.
I'm really...
Seven.
Is he a pizza guy?
You know what I miss penis?
Are you a boner guy?
What are you talking about?
You know what I miss penis?
Are you a boner guy?
Please clap.
I'm the one who should apologize.
What a dick!
Because...
Cause a room.
Cause a room.
Slapperoonie.
It's show time. ["Slapper Rooney"]
W-A-A-T-P-W-A-T-P!
Hello, Rooney.
So, guys and rubs, welcome to another episode
of Who Are These Podcasts.
The only show that helps this Christmas vixIXTA, that are the Missile.
I'm your host, Carol.
With me today, the man who's responsible for VIXTAITS entering into your spank bank, it's
Vinnie Paulino.
Sorry, everybody.
Please go to WhoAreThese.com, get our email address, voicemail number, link to our sub
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unedited live show live or whenever you'd like to take it to Ryan sale for devil com w a tp live
dot com a whole weekend of southern john hoewarety we need to put together a promotional video for that
today all day yeah that's gonna be it's coming along pretty good it looks good who do we do we got for that show? We got Shule Eager. Bob leave you Mike Morris,
Chrissy Mayer, Anthony Kumi, and Biddy Paulino, Trucker A.D. J. J. Gingles, Croach, Hannah, and
Earl Skankle. Earl Skankle's on the show as well. So myself will be there. It's gonna be a whole
thing. Do I imagine producer Chris? I say that? Nope. And the rest.
It's just three more people. I don't just leave it as
the end of the rest, etc.
Also, we encourage our listeners to give us a five-star review and it'll
podcast and then shit all over us in the comments section.
I'm hoping today will be the return of the review girl at the show.
Hannah has the rest of the year off.
Oh, so the rest of the year, the rest of the review girl at the show. Hannah has the rest of the year off.
So the rest of the year, the rest of the year. So hopefully we can get her on and with pay, yeah, Vic had to work all the way to weekend, but she might be
around. I mean, I don't want to jinx anything, but it'll probably just be a
potato again. Which is fine. I'm not that complaining. The one with the vagina.
I hope. No, no, not that one. Alright, the one with the vagina. I hope no, not that one. All right. The one with the sassy mouth.
But the sweet dance moves.
The movie we're viewing a show called National League Town.
This was a suggestion from Vinnie. We have both listened separately.
We have not discussed it with each other beforehand. Let's get into it.
This is a show hosted by Greg Prince and Jeff Heisen.
Yeah.
Now, we picked this show and you picked this show
because Jeff Heisen is Tom Meyer's sidekick.
Second banana.
That takes a certain kind of person to say,
yeah, I'll stay next to this guy be the second Mike.
I cannot believe after everything that I've heard
on this Metz oriented show.
And I'm watching his standup, which we are going to play some for you to talk about. I've heard on this Metz oriented show. And I'm watching his standup,
which we are going to play some for you to talk about.
I'm excited. I've watched that yet.
I am prepared to get excited.
How is it?
I don't understand how Tom Myers has eclipsed this man.
He is more talented.
Wow.
You're calling that right now.
Yeah.
All right, but then you're mind everyone.
It's a competition.
It's Tom Myers.
When you say more tales, did you be funnier? Yes, wow
Yeah, I would we can
The case for slander on this show
Now are you listening to this this this is like the giant turds sandwich giant douche
It's not great. You stay yourself to vote though. Yeah, that's a great thing to vote.
Yeah, if there's nothing here that is particularly good,
but when I was watching the standup, I was going,
oh, okay, well, that was a set up and a punchline
that made sense.
Oh, he's better than Tom.
Does he use fewer than 87 words to form a joke?
We're gonna get there.
Okay, that's your tease.
Well, find out about that.
Let's start off, I wanna do an intro to this match show.
We've never done a sports show.
I don't think I'm this show before.
Really?
And I spent a lot of time listening to the sports talk
in my lifetime.
I used to be really in the sports talk radio.
So I have to understand the point of it to some degree,
even though I don't really listen to it anymore.
I want to make a distinction between regular sports
talk and what the show is.
Oh, yeah, there's a big distinction.
This is a Homer show, folks.
This is a show for New York Met Homer's.
Well, all right, let's start off
with the introduction to the show.
The music, it doesn't make any sense at all.
Hello and welcome to National League Town.
It's fandom, it's history, it's life,
with Long Island's own great prints and Jeff Heisen.
Hey Greg.
Hey Jeff, I'm just hanging out here this winter,
not doing anything. What's this?
Oh, the Meta made another signing.
Well, they haven't, but it feels like it. What a week it's been on Monday. I didn't cut that. That's
just the horrible at it. That is your first minute of the show about, yeah. Now, I want
to bring on you guys know Christian black Christian Blasphold on the show a few times with
the black cast. Hey, Christian, what's going on, buddy? Thank you, Kyle, for making time for me as per usual. My appearance is underwritten
by tiny tauts, Dan studio and brain tree mass mentioned to be a T P for 8% off dance
lessons for your little ones. But please no fatties.
All right, perfect plug there. So Christian is not only a huge met's fan, but he used to
do a match show.
I did. I would do a, a streaming match show for after buzz TV. And I did it for two seasons. And then even I didn't want to talk about the met's anymore. But, uh, yeah. So if there's
anybody that this podcast should be for, it's probably me, right? And, you know, I, I, I,
I thought so when I started listening to it.
Well, I brought you on because my first question to you is, don't the meds have music associated with them? Isn't there? I know the cobs have a
time to meet the meds. Okay. It's time to greet. Isn't it? I don't know the
words. Is that right? That's pretty much it. Let's bring your kiddies, bring
your wife, guaranteed to have the time of your life, unless you stay for more
than three years
That why would they use that music?
Professional show and they're not explained in an episode. It's like his brother-in-law's band
So he uses their music. I think they're called like
Israel and you can find them on Spotify. I'm so
So good with that did for record sales because when I heard that I thought it sounded the same as the music from Tom Myers versus the rest of the world. It does.
Very similar.
I'm like, this is the big thing.
I thought it ended like a shadowy man from a shadowy point.
Oh, don't put them down.
Like, yeah, I love shadowy man from a shadowy planet.
I'm dare you, Chris.
No, no, but not as cool.
Not again.
All right.
All right.
So because you are a match fan and I am a sports fan and a baseball fan.
I think I understand what they're talking about here, but I'm glad you're here to kind
of interpret some of these things.
They will be listened to because they go deep.
Many of this is the op season.
A lot of trades on a moves happening right now.
Yeah.
And no one cares because it's the Mets.
Well, you know, cares is Jeff Heisen. He's very excited about a recent long term signing they had.
They had to keep Nimmo and they definitely did. And how great was that that we get to
see Brandon Nemmo's smile and more importantly his skills for eight years.
So I like these leads with smile. And I thought it was like what if there was a sports
talk show for gay guys that was just about how attractive the players are. He's gonna lead with
a shlaw. Yeah. Talking about like how cute the guy is seems like an odd thing to talk about
on a match show, but you know, well tune into the next episode where they talk about who wears the
tightest pants. No, I can't wait for that.
Did you see the ball, John the guy?
He's got a bad lead off, obviously.
Who's gonna compete with that?
They would find a way to make that boring these two.
Well, Greg tries to be a little too cute.
Now you'll notice that they opened up that show with Long Island's own, Greg Prince,
like, whoa, Greg Prince from Long Island.
The fuck is Greg Prince, like, whoa, Greg Prince is from Long Island. The fuck is Greg Prince?
Greg Prince wrote a book called Faith and Fear
in Flushing and Intense Personal History
of the New York Mets in 2009.
So he wrote an Intense Personal History,
so his history of the New York Mets.
Can you imagine how awful that has to be?
It's gotta be atrocious.
I don't care about your familyche I don't care about your family
I don't care about your childhood memories right don't care that that's exactly what is like there's probably three
Chabin there about Tom Seaver but whatever I remember my parents divorce
I would go down to the field and watch the game and
Darryl Strawberry would score drugs by the back gate and I would wave at him as I left sad to go home to a broken house
by the back gate. I would wave at him as I left sad to go home to a broken house. Well, that is, thank you for bringing that up. That is one of the things that I'm with Christian
on Christians and Matt's fan. I am not, but I did root for them in the 86. That was a
fun fucking game. Those guys, there's nobody. There's nobody in the league that was as fun
as those guys. You know, I mean, whoever your favorite team is, did your ace pitcher miss
the victory parade because he was literally spending 72 hours in a crackdown?
Probably not.
So then, you know, that's our team.
That's what we get.
Doc Goodin was on the open Anthony show
for some reason with David Leroth.
And David Leroth's talking about doing blowback of the day.
He's like, wow, we're on tour.
We had all this coke and the chicks.
And Doc Goodin's like, I was so addicted that I missed the World Series parade,
because I was in a drug dam and we were doing blow.
Yeah, that awesome ass of fucking cool.
We all do blow.
Parades anyway.
Yeah.
You get the environment in there.
So like, you were up, wasn't like figuring out that like,
Doc wouldn't felt bad about all of this,
because he feels really good about.
Yeah, no, no.
The doctor there to say like, I'd be dead if I didn't find Jesus. And things like that. But I was doing it out of the crack of her ass. It was amazing. He feels really good about his no No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no it, but would he care? We're doing cocaine's not fun for everyone. I guess that. I guess that.
So, but anyway, that was a very fun team.
Of course, nails was on that team.
Our boy Lenny.
Lenny Dijkstra, still one of our favorites of the crew.
Favourites of all time.
So this is where this guy, Greg Prince, he tries to be too cute.
He tries to be too cute all over the place on the show.
It's very annoying.
I know it doesn't pay to develop an opinion. You all see, he's been beginning to think because we were kind of bemoaning the idea that
Brandon Nemo might very well leave. If I had had to bet a nickel on it, I would have
prepared to have lost that nickel, but now I'm going to die.
All right. So this is a guy that they brought up in of this stuff. And so they're talking about developing players.
And you know what it doesn't pay to do is develop an opinion
because apparently the week before they didn't think
they were gonna recite this guy and they're like,
find good riddance who needs this asshole.
You know, it's slash nice out that great.
So then they go on after they signed them
to a seven year, a very expensive contract.
Now they're like, oh, this is great, yeah.
Listen, anybody who's gonna take the money and stay,
we will invest with all kinds of appealing qualities
much as we were deciding after all those years
that maybe Jacob DeGron was in our bow
ideal of a New York myth.
Turns out, Brandon Nemo is our bow
ideal of a New York myth.
So to the point that I think you made earlier, Benny,
these guys are just homers, they're just shooters.
Which is the most, the least interesting thing to listen to
when it comes to sports like,
not only guys are just overly negative all the time either.
We have our fair share of that buffalo.
Sure.
That's a bad team's, but it's really obnoxious
to hear people just like, yeah, you know,
if we lose this guy, still think it's a good decision,
oh, we said it, that's the best decision.
Like, what is that yeah, though?
Those are the people who are just trying to like pad it for themselves. Yes, so that they don't go crazy because they're way too
invested and way too invested way too invested and it's funny because we're catching them in a time when the
Mets are probably gonna be pretty good. They have a decent team. They were good last year didn't do much in the playoffs, but
Actually, it's funny because they're talking about all these moves that they're making. Basically what the
meds did is they didn't resize some really good players and they signed some really good
players to replace them. It's kind of all wash, but they're acting like it's going to be
amazing. It's just like it's amazing. Yeah, it's like, all right. You listened to a whole
different episode than I did. Christian. What did you pick up on? So as I was listening to the one you were already playing clips from, they dropped a bonus
episode because overnight, I don't want to bore people with this, but it's kind of a big
deal. Carlos Correa, who had been on the asterisk for a long time, he had like a 13 year, I don't
know, $380 million deal in place with Samford.
It's a giant, right?
Yeah, with the giants.
They had a press conference schedule for yesterday.
And then they canceled the press conference
and they're like, there was something in the medical report
that we didn't like.
So then right before I went to bed
at like just before midnight, Pacific time,
I read that the meds had signed them
and they're gonna move this lifelong shortstop to third base.
And they gave them like, I don't know, 12 years and 320 million dollars.
And without leaving.
That was always exciting.
Yeah.
So this was kind of a big deal.
And I was listening to these guys and they were talking about how they had some best
of shows planned for later in the rest of the month.
And I was like, oh my god, I can't believe that they didn't do a special episode for this really big news. But they did, they did like a 20 minute episode. And I
listened to that today and I have, I have 12 modest clips for you, Carl. All right, we're going to
start here. Let's, let's start with the number one. So CB01 as it's, as it's listed.
On today's show, are you kidding me? Did that actually happen? The Metz
got all more Navias. No, that's not it. The Metz got Carlos Correa. I think that's a
perfect example of these guys trying to be funny. Now, I'm not sure which guy that is.
Is that Tom Myers? Yes, that's Tom Myers sidekick. Yeah. So the fact that he's funnier than
Tom Myers is saying an awful lot about about Tom. Yeah. So the fact that he's funnier than Tom Myers is saying an awful lot
about about Tom. Yeah. Because it's not great. But the pile of shit. It's the worst
community in all time. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, sometimes the steam kind of dies off.
It gets cold, but it's still a pile of shit. Yes. Well, his co-host isn't much better.
He goes a long way for a joke here in CB3 is my
other, my next clip. As we remember the late Franco Harris who just died today, or at least we
got word that he died 50 years since what is known is the Immaculate Reception celebrated in Pittsburgh.
I'm sure still rude in the San Francisco Bay area where their Oakland
Reader fans still. I think we can call this the Immaculate Interception.
I did that. Yeah, obviously. What's so annoying about that? I don't think you did.
What's so annoying about that is if that's going be a good joke you have to know the backstory already don't explain it
Don't explain about the next
Reception which is happening and how long it was like just if people know what they know if they don't it's fine
If you ever see the S.O.L. sketch of Ethan the Hanukkah kid
It's like Vanessa Bayer plays him and he's just a kid. Oh, yeah. Oh, I'm ready for my Hanukkah presence
and he starts talking that he always uses the same line over and over again and tries to be cute. Yeah, that's what I feel like this whole show
Yes, the SNL sketch correct. It's
Goes on way too long. Look at us and I'll sketch. There's no kicker at the ad just like an SNL sketch and the celebrity guest was no one I want to hear from
Yeah, right. In my fourth clip, they try not to badmouth someone,
but they managed to pull it off.
So CB4, which is also a great movie.
I'm still haunted by the fact that 51 years ago,
the Metz went out, got a big time, American League,
All-Star Shortstop named Jim Fragosi,
and stuck him at third base, which he never played before. And well, that didn't work out too well. Well, we didn't give up
no one Ryan this time. And I'm going to go out and eliminate say Carlos Correa is not
Jim Fragosi, no disrespect to the memory of Jim Fragosi, a great player for the California
Angels all those years.
So I pulled that because of the no disrespect to Jim Fregosi, who I just reminded all of you,
how terrible he was and what an awful trade that was and that, you know, it's long before
my time, but I sure know about the Nolan Ryan for Jim Fregosi trade.
Yeah.
So what you're saying is just saying no disrespect doesn't make it not disrespectful.
Yeah.
No.
Chad Zumox and unfounding hat, but no disrespect.
No disrespect. no disrespect.
No disrespect.
He's never said I'm funny.
He's just gonna slide.
But he, you know, he's causing some comedian.
No disrespect to Chad Zuma.
Yeah, I got that one.
That's all good.
He operates on a level that we can only call pitiful,
but no disrespect.
Right.
No disrespect.
All right.
The hosts are very complimentary of one another.
Let's go with CB6.
I didn't know you when you were in law school, but you must have crammed really well for the bar exam and for whatever else you had to pass because you've got so much Carlos Coreia information granted.
You've got the internet. I know for a fact that you were not up all night doing this because you call me early the smoke in shock.
So could I see you, my friend, for doing all this research?
I'll move.
Hi.
Hey, Carl, can we do a little role playing for a moment?
Can you ask me, Hey, what do you know about Carlos Correa?
Hey, what do you know about Carlos Correa?
Chris, hang on.
Oh, okay.
So he's a career, he's a career 279 hitter and, uh, I guess, uh,
why are you saying that?
I'm a research, basically baseball players in 2022, is that you're telling me, Chris,
but just did it.
Yeah, I know.
To say it all night.
Who does to him for taking all the time to do that?
Very impressive, obviously.
And we do learn a fact about Jeff Heiss in there.
He's an attorney.
He's a little bit, a legitimate lawyer. I forgot about that. Yeah, I didn't know that until I got his standup. I watched his standup. We're gonna be chatting about that in a let's go with a murder suicide, sir.
You are a silly mistake.
It's close.
It's got shot of thoughts.
It's podcasting suicide.
So you'll appreciate it.
But let's go with number nine.
When I first heard about this today,
my reaction out loud into my wife was,
well, I guess he's not taking it with him.
Yeah, my reaction was holy shit.
The meds just stole a fucking player from the giants.
Instead, he's like, oh, yeah, well, I guess the owner's not going to take his money with him.
There's no excitement from these guys.
Well, do you think that his wife is fucking following this?
Like, do you think she's just like, what are you talking about?
What do you mean?
It looks like they're flushing their money down and flushing again honey. Oh good
One hundred if I tried to explain to my wife why this was exciting I'd get like 15 seconds in and she'd be like
Okay, so it's good, right? Okay, thanks
They may have a player like their birdie made off. It was really impressive
They're able to do my last actual clip from the body of the show
Yeah, is clop 10. And you
know, you were talking about what if there were sports talk for gay guys? What might sound
like this? Let's listen to Clop 10. Nice. Let's get Liam Hendrix is also, by the way, an
excellent person. You can Google his comments about only going to a team that has a pride
night. Oh, weird. Yeah, because that's what I want out of a relief picture. You know,
that he feels that it's important to have a pride night.
I don't want to wait for Team S. Star Wars night.
So I get, you know, it's just like, there's anyone home games.
If one of them, we're not celebrating Darth Vader, then count me out.
That sells $160 million.
Nope.
I want Darth Vader pride night.
I want a pink Darth Vader.
A pink Darth Vader.
By the way, don't wait to walk for it. I was going to say, give Disney
enough time. Right. Give, give, give Kelly another couple of months. So come out with it.
I'm sure. All right. So my, my last two tricks, I think it'll be appreciated by Carl,
but anybody who listens to podcasts or possibly hosts a podcast, let me play the ending
of the show as it was intended, which is clip 11.
Okay.
Just so you know, this was not an episode that we expected to do.
NLT Studios was on a holiday break.
We have two more episodes this year that are in the can as they say, and you'll hear
them, but we couldn't wait to talk to you about this monumental signing. So look for those two new episodes before the end of the year.
Until next time, I'm Jeff Heisen. I'm Greg Prince. And as always, let's go met.
Okay. Cheers. So that, cheers. That is followed by, I was listening and I'm like,
well, there's another minute and 45 seconds on this track. Oh, okay, they rushed it. It's probably just dead air. Oh, no, it's not
just dead air. It was their first attempt at trying to do the ending of the show. So if
you could play clip 12, we'll hear how he just kind of gave up on it. So look for those
two new episodes before the end of the year. Anything else Greg?
Nothing else at all Jeff.
Unless Carlos, Korea, unless Steve.
Until next time, I'm Jeff Heisen.
I'm Greg Prince.
And as always, let's go Mets.
This is going great.
I love it. I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
Good stuff.
The fact that there was no there was no time for quality correction.
I heard a cold open.
I've never heard of a cold clothes.
Well, that's the coldest clothes you could get.
Well, that brings up something that I wanted to talk about because these fucking dorks
think that this is a real show that people
listen to like it's an important show. I know. It's so pathetic. To be fair, I might subscribe to it now.
Okay. All right. We'll be trading notes about it. The Hall of Fame ballot was announced and there
are three meds who are now eligible for the first time. ArADICI, Carlos Beltran, and Francisco Rodriguez.
Greg and I have talked about RADICI and Carlos Beltran
on our Hall of Fame shows, which you can find
as the first three episodes of Nationally Town and Spoiler.
You'll be able to hear those conversations again next week
in our best of.
They do best of, at the end of the year,
buddy. Do you know anyone else who does that kind of bullshit?
I certainly do.
In fact, Teezer see you at the best of the end of the year show.
That's right.
Tom Myers does a best of.
He does a best of mid-year.
He does a best of at the end of the year.
And of course Vinnie's bringing that
as his worst of the year, W-A-D-P,
episode we're doing this Friday.
He sucks.
And our best of.
But how annoying is that?
These guys are like, now look,
we're gonna talk some Hall of Fame stuff.
You wanna hear more of this.
You can check out this episode.
We're gonna talk about it in the best of,
that we're putting out.
Now, this is the Dynamite Analysis,
as they talk about three former meds
who are now eligible for the Hall of Fame.
And I want to know, Christian, as you want to know also which one or ones deserve to be
in the Hall of Fame.
What do you think about already, Dickie, Carlos Beltran and Francisco Rodriguez?
Three check marks for me, Jeff.
Of course.
Oh, shit.
This fucking Matt's home.
We're just like, I don't know why there's anyone in the whole thing who isn't a bad
I don't get it like it's all be back today is there a argument over this
Right, is this even up for debate?
But like already Dicky is a knuckleballer. Yes, and he tried to get into the league actually pitching like a real pitcher pitches
And he couldn't so we had like figure out this weird fucking stunt pitch. Yep. It's not it's not like a good baseball player
If you figure out the stuff pitch like more of a magician, but he did what he did win a say young
But he only won one so you know
I really question that that's just stupid
Did Wakefield make the Hall of Fame because he's the only knuckleball you can remember. I don't know
Finney. I don't want to have this conversation right now
Probably for the best moving on any come on my podcast and we'll talk about Charlie half- Vinnie. I don't want to have this conversation right now. Probably for the best. Move it on.
Vinnie, come on my podcast and we'll talk about Charlie Haap for an hour.
I'm busy.
All right.
I want to play watching producer Chris's hair.
I want somebody's got to.
All right.
I want to play a couple real quick, uh,
Atomset jokes and shockingly, these are like Greg Prince trying these jokes and they're
brutal.
And if we are to believe that you lose three starting pictures to free agency and you
have to scramble, this isn't a scramble.
This is eggs Benedict.
This is Keesh.
I don't know what else to say.
It's eggs Florentine.
It's a three cheese Denver omelet.
X 4 to you. What do we five? Those eggs aren't that great.
Florida.
Did you take a picture of your eggs? He also said,
she's just nonsensical. I don't even know what he's talking about.
He also said shit. It's just nonsensical that I don't even know what he's talking about. If your plan B isn't like plan D, you're already ahead of the game.
I don't know what that means. What does that mean?
What does that mean?
He says a lot of this nonsensical like this.
The problems that you don't have to solve are the best solution.
Talk about retarded.
Talk about retarded. The problems you don't have to solve are the best solution. Talk about retarded. Talk about retarded. The problems you don't get to solve are the best solutions.
Yeah, certainly.
It's pretty time that makes sense.
Why not?
Another talking about this new picture
they have coming in from Japan.
And you know, whenever someone comes in from the Japanese league,
you don't really know how they're going to do in the US.
Some do very, very well.
Yep.
Others, not so much. The different game.
But now we're talking about what's specific player. And I want these guys brilliant analysis.
One of the guys wrote a book about baseball. The other guy's a fat loser, I guess it's an attorney.
So let's find out what they have to say about this guy's chance is at the MLB.
And they could either be fantastic. This guy is coming to get to the United States and is going to
mystify batters who have never seen him before or it will turn out. Oh no, he has a lot of work to do to catch up
to Major League hitting because he's never seen players like this before. I choose to believe the former.
Well, yeah, of course, he's shocking. But could you imagine, like I said,
I've listened to sports talk over there. Could you imagine someone coming out Jim
Rome or something going, look at my take on this. This guy's going to be really good
or not so much or somewhere between who would listen to that? So this is the imagined
content. Imagine that guy is a caller to Jim Rome. Yes. What he would say to that analysis.
It's like, okay, so you're saying he's going to be good or possibly he's going to be bad. Do you know the rule of the show, the
Jim Rome show was a viewer color? Have a take. Don't suck. This guy has no tape and he
fucking sucks. This is the last clip I want to play of his brilliant baseball analysis.
We've got them at their peak. We are going to hope that their peak lasts a little longer,
more than a little longer. I suppose in the most case, that's how peaks work.
That's not, I hope their peak lasts forever. That's how, that's, you know, call that a peak that.
Well, these two are still waiting. So they really don't know how big.
Right. That's true. They're so open to hit their big.
All right, Benny, I am interested to see Jeff Heisen stand up.
Okay. So we read the next show sucks. Yeah, Benny, I am interested to see Jeff Heisen stand up. Okay. So we
read the next show sucks. Yeah, it's not. Alright. So we're going to talk stand up now for a little
bit here now. I've always been fascinated by this Jeff Heisen guy simply because again, like we
talked about, he's second banana to the worst, most rotten banana that there is. Well, it's funny
too because we've documented this that Todd Myers is the worst stand up of that there is. Well, it's funny too, because we've documented this,
that Todd Myers is the worst standup of all time,
but he also might be the worst podcaster of all time.
Correct.
So you got Jeff Heisen who's going,
yeah, I'll be on your show,
and this has been going on for years.
Jeff Heisen's, why has a YouTube channel?
Okay, that it was sent to me.
Okay.
How many thousands of subscribers does he have on that 14. Oh, okay 14 total. Oh, no
14 total I'm guessing close friends relations this Prince guy
So he has point zero one four thousand subscribers got it. I think go now all of his videos are roughly the same amount of time
Now all of his videos are roughly the same amount of time. Oh my God, Tom Myers says the podcast is always 29 minutes.
Well, these are all seven to eight minutes, roughly.
Oh, that's too long.
And I watched pretty much all the videos on here.
Okay.
And it's him doing the same set.
Oh, I really want to just different.
You start stealing this guy's jokes.
I'll fucking fuck you right now.
Mother fucker.
I'll be right to you.
Oh, wait, you're goddamn figuring out me like that.
How dare you.
I'll just be leading over my wife.
Still that one from Heisen.
I'll fucking knock whatever.
I was at the front there.
I had a bunch of life.
You get Heisen.
You piece of shit.
Oh, you're making me bad. Now, what we have here, the show that we're seeing on the screen, is a, what looks like
a show and a restaurant, it's not a comedy club.
So where he's playing is definitely not a professional comedy environment.
It's not a place where they would normally have stand up.
So I want that to be noted.
Yeah, that's abundantly clear here.
Yeah.
Now this lady gives him
a really hot intro, guys. Okay. And let's watch the intro and go through his opening joke.
He's performed all over, including in New York as a comic strip live and it got them
wide. So I want everybody to start clapping from the audience. Halfway through the crowd. All right, everybody, give it a warm 18th and 21st welcome,
to Jeff Heisen.
Hi, everybody.
Hi, everybody.
Give it a warm 18th and 21st welcome, too.
Jeff Heisen.
Hi, everybody.
Hi, everybody.
Jeff Heisen.
Hi, everybody.
Hi, everybody.
Give it a warm 18th and 21st welcome, too.
Jeff Heisen. Hi, everybody.
Hi, everybody. Hi, everybody.
Hi, everybody.
Hi, everybody. Hi, everybody.
Hi, everybody. Hi, everybody. Hi, everybody. Hi, everybody. Hi, everybody. Hi, everybody. older comics tonight and I had a show not long ago and before it began the other comics were discussing the effects of drug use on comedy
They asked me my opinion and I say lipitor has no effect
That's just opening joke guys good icebreaker right there. I got to tell you you guys would have noticed I'm super old
Too many words.
Yeah.
But a better joke than anything Tom Myers has ever read.
Very true.
Still too many words, but yeah, I agree with you.
Yep.
I went, wow.
I am surprised that opening joke had an ounce of humor to it.
All right, next joke.
I had another show and there was a DJ.
DJ asked me what song I wanted to hear while I walked on stage and I said uptown
funk sung by Bruno Mars because that's my jam and he played tiny dancer by
Elton John. Not exactly the same. I asked him why. He said you're old. I thought
it was more total 3 that's not nice
that's not nice
that was the punchline that was the punchline
tiny dancers is that about being old?
is it just because it's older sogg? I don't know Carl I don't understand this joke at all
I don't get that one
but I'm like okay we started strong with the lipitor joke
it made sense
it made sense that we went into this jubbled mess of the DJ decided not to play the song
I asked for.
Let's see where he goes from here, Carl.
Okay, yeah, let's figure this out.
It's tough for a guy to get older because we still look at women the same way we always have.
What women look at us differently?
We become distinguished.
Yeah, I know I'll a girl in her 20s distinguish
as me from other guys she's the
English again from someone she full-round with what I love about that is he
delivered the joke and then followed it what he saw he got no reaction with the
mouth smack he just said yep that's Yeah, there's not gonna be any more tags on that one
I know that the majority of the audience won't be able to appreciate the fact that we watched the video
But whoever was filming it for him zoomed in for the punch line. Yes
It's gonna be great. It's pretty good. It's true. They're anticipating here comes the singer
And I looked up I looked up this venue 18th and 21st. It is a restaurant. It's in Columbia,
Maryland. If you know that part of Maryland, it's a lot of very rich people with huge
houses and gigantic yards. So they would probably find some of this funny, but it doesn't
seem to be going out. And that's what I wanted to point out. Is this crowd really is built
for him? We're going to learn a little bit more about Jeff during the set because he does talk about his real job.
Okay, but let's-
Hold on a second.
Can I just break down real quick with that joke was?
He wants to fuck 20 year olds.
Sky's in his 70s.
Yep.
And he's saying like, yeah, that's just
for you and men and women.
Well, no, no, no, as a guy at 20,
I don't want to fuck a chicken or 70s either.
No, Carl.
This is free.
I don't know, go for the way.
It is relatable. Yeah. It is free. I don't know. It is relatable. It is
definitely relatable that way. But he sucks, Carl. Yeah.
All right. The delivery is terrible. And he also, by the way,
didn't say that he wanted to fuck younger girls. He said he
wants to fool around. Well, he was over the she would want to
fool around. I think that he tagged his own punchline with the
same punchline. Yes, he did. I'm not mistaken on that one. What if I say it this way? Yeah, still not funny. All right, just not trying
But the old man
Speak in this is pretty astounding. Okay, let's keep it going. Let's keep going
Now I don't want to disappoint you. That's as dirty as my arcets. Sorry
I have a reputation as a clean comic
because I don't curse on stage.
So one night I was asked to open a show for a gospel comic.
And it was a great show, but before it began the promoter,
asked all of us to gather together.
This is already way too long.
And pray for a good show.
That's fine, except another comic asked me,
does that offend you as a Jew?
And I said no, but I've heard your act
and you should have been praying for better material.
You know?
I'm sure him.
Now this is the kind of joke that I feel like
he bounced off a tom and Tom said great go for it because
the punchline is hey man I'm not offended but maybe next time you should pray for a better
act. You could do a joke there but the joke did not fit the setup.
Correct. I was thinking the same thing because like was that offended by that because
you were a Jew like it went too far and far and one direction to come back to where it was.
I was like,
and the man just said, does this offend you that you're Jewish?
And he's got like, you're at sucks.
Yeah, that's his response.
Yeah, this gospel comic is praying for a good show.
Yeah, I die.
I'm not gonna push that one out, never mind.
Yeah.
This gospel comic, right?
Gospel comic.
The fuck is that?
I think we need a callback real quick
Lipitor lipitor, so he had one good joke
But this audience is with him guys this audience is this crowds with I want to watch Russell Simmons gospel comic jam
That's something a lot of fun. I was on a praying. It's that's pretty cool. Ezekiel
All right, so the's still with him here.
I have a day job.
Yep.
Some of you, this guy just said, good, you need one.
Thanks a lot.
I'm a lawyer.
Hold your applause for lawyers.
But I don't like talking about being a lawyer when I'm on stage.
And I think that's because we don't know each other yet
Hold on a second
This is like the fourth joke is about how he's a lawyer's like and I'm like talking about how a lawyer
Well, why is it entering into a 20-minute set already and
You know you would think that if this is something that you really wanted to like hide and not talk about that
If you were gonna talk about you would make it really good
Yeah, and make it interesting. Okay. Nope. Not gonna happen. No each other yet
And when people are introduced to a comedian they say nice things
Like tell me a joke
Say something funny
That doesn't happen with lawyers or you nobody you know? Nobody meets a lawyer and says, tell me a statute.
Say something in a lot.
And I sometimes give my jobs confused.
One day I was in court and the opposing counsel said,
I object.
But I forgot where I was and I thought he was a heckler. So he turns him and said I object to your face.
The judge didn't like that at all.
I bet that goes up really well at the company party. You know, if he was
trying to sell us another attorney bodies, I'd be like,
oh, I'm gonna use that one.
Someone green loop that, but.
What really kills me about this
is as he was going through this,
he was getting laughs,
and then no one laughed at the actual punch line.
Which is really astounding.
That's hard to do.
Well, because it's hard to have a good setup.
True.
And just rack it.
Cause it's so non-positable
Something I forget what's job I'm in do you yeah did you that would happen
I've been performing comedy since 2001. I have never been somewhere and all of a sudden thought someone was a heckler
Yeah, and I turned into nom to me. It's never happened
You're like didn't really does this at the, you think when he does this at the company
Christmas party like the Monday after everybody's like, oh man, that's a, I object to your
face.
That's great stuff, man.
Yeah.
You got to go to high fives.
Yeah.
Fucking A, he stakes.
But I cannot believe this crowd is still with him guys.
Crowds still with him.
All right, good.
They want to love him.
They're polite.
Let me tell you a little bit more about myself.
I got in an elevator recently.
Thank you.
And it got gets in and starts talking about politics.
In an elevator.
You can't do that.
That's a breach of elevator etiquette.
You see, I believe there's certain rules you have to follow before you take an elevator
ride.
Now, if you have the conversation, it cannot last longer than the time it takes to travel
to floors.
It's just not fair to the other passengers.
One day I got in on the first floor with two women.
I'd press three, they'd press five.
One of them turns the other and asks, so how is your date? And the other one said, it was so romantic. We had
dinner, then we went back to his place, and then we, and they turned to look at me
as the door opened on my floor. But I'm not going anywhere. I want to know what happens. Did you fool around?
So, this is your floor, and I said yes, but that was before I did.
You had a date.
Why do they bring up the politics thing?
I'm still hung up on it to come back to politics.
Where did we get to the politics?
What was the point of that?
Karl's here. Karl? You're going to gonna be glad to know this all comes around like a real like a real true comedy genius
Okay, good. I'm real fucking Mike Per Biglia for a second for a second there full circle for a second that I thought it was Tom Myers
I mean
Please keep talking I'll just stand in the corner
We won't be creepy at all.
Oh, and ask that guy and start talking about politics.
I got so mad, I pressed all the buttons and told him to
that, and I called an ascetic.
See how we all like that.
Gotcha!
Oh, shit. He does a lot of those, those after the punchline sort of letting the
dust settle. Oh, the judge didn't like that. That'll show him. Yeah. You know, it's a lot
of like, this is the Chad Zumak, please clap moment. I was actually going to compare them
because like, Chad's was really pitiful, but this is exactly the same thing
It's the right I'm not getting the reaction I need to right and him basically trying to just say something
To get these people to know that yeah, it's it's not gonna get better the best this peak is not gonna last longer than this
This great, huh Carl? Let me say a little bit more about myself. I write elevators
Yeah, great. How Carl let me tell you a little bit more about myself. I write elevators
Let's never get the time I started Carl. I'm a lawyer and I write elevators sometimes. Here's the three lines
Let me tell you a little bit about myself. Yeah, I took an elevator ride the other day. Yeah, I think I talked about you
Those are the three lines Thank you. Oh, let me start that one over again
Tell me I'm wrong. It case me forgot how that where we started from here
I got an elevator
You're welcome. Yeah, usually that's an applause break apparently
Next joke Yeah, usually that's an applause break apparently. Yeah. That was fucking sucks. All right, next joke.
What do we got?
That's the pretty long.
And he said, she's been married three years.
I've been married a long time.
But I still look at other women.
I think that all married guys do.
Well, except for one guy I know, he says he doesn't,
because it's disrespectful to his wife.
That's sweet.
I have a nickname for him.
Wire!
You know, as soon as he leaves the house, his wife's watching Magic Mike.
You're not a respondent.
That's an obs say to you.
So bad.
And what is the sad thing is I came out of the school and yeah, better than Tom.
It is better than Tom.
It is better than Tom.
It's way more polished than Tom.
Yeah.
And it's fewer words than Tom.
He hasn't talked about a bog at Transplant.
Yeah, but other than that, it's better than Tom.
Yeah.
I just really think that the other thing to point out at this point is he was talking about I looking at other women being older.
Yeah.
He already did those jokes.
That's true.
We could have combined that back then.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's called, you know, set structure.
Right.
You have the jokes of the same feather together.
Right.
So that works.
Holy shit.
Did you take a class from Stuttering Jatter or something?
Because he's the other guy who knows all about Stead Up Comedy
and how it works?
That's impressive, buddy.
Go to throw hot coffee.
I ain't gonna face.
Let's do it else.
You do blocks.
I'm gonna throw hot coffee in your face
and I'm gonna free Chris.
Yeah.
Next week, the Chris show, everyone,
produced a Chris and friends.
He'll know this equipment will work.
He can borrow his account,. He'll be on fire.
The drops are going to be good. The drops will be good.
Young guy I know asked me what marriage is like. I said let me tell you a story.
My wife asked me if I wanted to go somewhere and I said no.
And she said, oh, we're going.
And I said, so why do you ask me?
And she said, I want you to feel as if you are involved.
And that's what marriage is like.
Women are nodding their head, yes.
The men are nodding their head. The men are nodding their head. I hate when you have to explain.
Eddie, that's fans here tonight.
Yeah, I have anything to explain.
You're connecting with the audience.
Hey, that joke really resonated with you guys, huh?
Yeah, people are nodding their heads at me.
If you like that, I got six minutes on Brandt and Nemo's smile.
That's a callback right there.
Boy or his pants tight. It may if you like that I got six minutes on Brandon Nemo smile
That's a call back right there boy or his pants
This guy over here's not he's that oh, we just want some more butter. Okay, my fault. I just apologize All right, this guy over here's looking for a waitress
Now I this next to our a chunk. Oh, good. That I caught driving with my wife.
Now, I just want to, I don't know what the fuck
he's talking about here.
Go ahead, Carl.
All right.
Probably driving with his wife.
I would bet.
Yeah, but it's so dumb.
You know, you're married when you're driving,
and somebody hunts a horn, and your wife immediately turns
to you and says, what did you do?
LAUGHTER
The horn is four lanes away on the other side of the highway and she thinks that it's your fault. And if you think I'm wrong about that, see who
gets the blame the next time you lose the car in the parking lot.
This dude is fucking hot. Now drive
in somebody hot. Now you're gonna find out what's like when
you lose the car in the parking lot. What are you even
saying? What is what that tag? But did not belong there.
That's all he goes you know you're married when your wife
that's all you need to say your wife's there. You're married.
You know you're married. You're married. Where the person riding to curth you is your wife. I want to see Chris is that. That's funnier.
By the way, there's never been a funny joke told on stage that starts with you
know you're married. That's the word. I've ever heard. Oh, good. Murts, sucks. Ha, ha, ha.
Oh, but he's not done with his driving with his wife jokes.
I hope this one starts.
Yeah, my comfortable wife, listen to this bullshit.
So this twat sitting in the passenger seat.
And she steps fucking with the radio.
And I go, bitch, I don't want to listen to fucking PXY.
I don't want to listen to you shit.Y. I don't want to listen to you shit
You know what I'm talking about better not even their heads. Yes, women are getting up to leave. What is happening here?
It's important to support each other when you marry
My wife has my back when we're in the car with the GPS lady
The GPS takes me down a side road and I ask it, where are you taking me and my wife heals at it?
Yeah, what are you stupid?
When wearing the car it's like wearing a gang.
A weird middle aged Jewish gang.
Middle aged?
Sir.
The band news.
That's your doctor, that's a bad news for you.
I've been with him in other 70 years.
How to see Mr. Heissed.
Where did he write that joke 35 years ago?
Oh, he's middle aged.
I'm a very offended trebuchet.
I know.
Oh, Jeff Heissed you stink.
I just had a fourth quarter of my life.
So we got like, what the fuck is this guy talking about?
Now are you guys ready for some great greedy carcass?
Am I?
I mean, you talked about the GPS lady was pretty cut again.
Gritty carcass, I gotta imagine.
We're like a gang.
It's gonna get spicy.
I like how he pronounced the G at the end, gang.
Ugh.
On the day of our anniversary,
I went to our Facebook page.
I remember happy anniversary to my wonderful wife.
This counts as a card.
She didn't mind.
We've been married for so long.
We just get each other whatever cards are on sale.
You don't have any times we celebrate it, quanzo.
Some racial humor right there.
It's pretty edgy for him. Don't you think June teeth is a funny
punch like you do. I'm never gonna do deep cars. I wouldn't but I will. Why are the
cards on sale? By the way, I want to point out, yeah, I want to point out something.
Yeah, it's like after Christmas is start like they're not there anymore. You know, it's not like candy after Halloween. It's marked out, but it's still there.
So, that's my trade of thought.
Oh, I want to point out what he said there where he goes.
I posted on her Facebook page.
This counts as your card.
I guarantee that's true.
This looks like one of those corny assholes
who does show on Facebook to get a rise out of his body.
He's like, oh, that was a pretty good joke.
Yeah, his 14 subscribers on YouTube.
Yeah.
Well, no, I'm your Facebook friends.
I do a show about this called Who Are These Socials.
And I look at my Facebook feed.
I see how corny these assholes are.
Nobody listens to that.
That's what I'm telling you about it.
Because no one's heard it.
I'm going to tell someone somewhere.
I do a true crime show too, a case to do to know.
How hard do you think it would be to create some kind of movement to get him to apologize
for the quanza joke?
I'll put a lot of effort into it.
Because I Christian should.
I'm as you surprised that he used quanza there.
Because I feel like in his world that could be a fine sym.
Like why is that a cell?
Oh, are you dismissing that holiday?
You think that's discounted?
Well, I feel like you should flood that YouTube channel.
Ladies and gentlemen, no, no, no,
observant report.
We're not here to fuck with Jeff Heisen.
I'm not saying you go on there and report him.
What I'm saying is just go on there
and let him know what you thought of that joke.
Okay, fair enough.
It's completely different, Vinnie.
Should I point this out? Because I feel bad when I point this out thought of that joke. Okay, fair enough. It's completely different, Vinnie.
Should I point this out?
Because I feel bad when I point this out, because it seems like a really crazy insult.
But I have better teeth than the sky.
That's not a good thing.
It's not a good thing.
Anyway.
And it was even more fucked up as he's got more money than...
I know, right.
He's a fucking attorney.
Do something about that.
It was a podcaster.
All right.
This guy stinks.
Are you ready for the closer here?
This is his closer now folks. I want you know you have listened to his whole set. This was his set. Okay.
This is the set that he posts like multiple versions of a different places. It was an emotional roller coaster for me.
But I don't know. What else is behind?
Let's hit the closer.
I've been married for so long. I forgot forgotten what sets his life when you're single.
There's a single guy at work. He said, I can't wait to go home. My girl's gonna be there.
We're gonna have sex tonight. And I said, but it's Tuesday.
You'll see.
My name is Jeff Eisenhower.
It's super generic and that setup drives me nuts.
Because no one says like, oh yeah.
Hey, guess what I'm going to do later, buddy.
I'm going to have sex with my girlfriend.
Like telling me that man, my girlfriend,
I'm going to go all the way to that.
I knew you're dating for two and a half years.
I assume you guys have sex.
Why are you telling me that? It's weird.
I find everything that I watch this out. I'm gonna jerk off tonight.
Thanks, Carl.
Thanks for letting us know that.
No, I can't.
This whole set's very polished for what it is, a turd,
but it's very polished.
We're doing it for decades.
Yeah, I feel like this guy just does whatever, whenever,
and this is what he does when he shows up.
Now, I sent you, we've now watched this whole set.
And like I told you, there's a bunch of versions of it online.
He keeps posting the set in different venues.
So I was looking for the newest set of his,
and I sent it to you, Carl, but it's the whole thing.
But I want you to see something.
Okay.
This is the weirdest part of standup comedy.
This is a weird like fight club version of standup when really bad comics can't give
booked anywhere.
They do this in Rochester.
I'm sure they do it in your town when really bad comics can't get booked anywhere.
They booked themselves in one of the comics houses and invite everybody over.
Do you know about this? Oh
This is news to me. This is Jeff Heisen live from Megan's basement Oh, no is Megan from is she one of the people who's on top Myers podcast possibly okay now
There are six people in the audience. Okay. That's all that's there. There's a camera. There's like six people in the room
I'll tell you this but I didn't watch any of these videos that we just watched.
Yeah, I did watch a little bit of this one just because I wanted to see how it started off.
Yeah, and this makes sense to me now because these six people give him so much laughter on every joke.
Because it's one of those people is next.
Right. Exactly. They're like, ah, we're all having fun here.
It is. And my wrong. Does this look like mental patients at fucking...
Yeah.
What floor over the Kuku's nest? They're all just cheering and clapping.
Holy.
You gotta see this people.
Wow.
Mason, we're in Jeff Hines, and everybody in Jeff Hines.
Yeah!
Yeah!
Haha.
They're clapping like fucking seals.
Thank you.
It's only there's seven people there, but you're right. There's all these things. They're filling that room. We found Jeff and the host. So there's four.
I'll check out his opening joke. Before you worry about it, I'm not jokes.
Before you worry about it, it's a call back to somebody else's stuff. I'm not Joseph's father.
It's tough following Joseph because we have the same act.
Little proud work. Yeah. Now I'm going to be on the oldest comic of the night and
I had a show not long ago before it began. The other comics were discussing the effects of drug use on comedy Drop that fucking mic and walk on stage
Dude people are still laughing at that
Holy shit, this is the weirdest part of comedy there. It's like the the yes we can movement of like open-mikers.
Vinnie, I've talked about this before,
because I come from the music scene.
And there are venues here in Rochester,
and I'm sure there are every other town out there
where shitty metal bands get together,
and there's seven of the bands that play in one night,
and the entire audience is the other bands
and their girlfriends.
And they just sit there and go nuts for each other
with their shitty metal music that no one likes.
Yeah, but it's this Megan's basement?
Like Megan's basement is what Vic hopes to get booked at
I have another show and DJ asked me what song I wanted to you while I walked on stage and I said
I wanted to get a lot of work done stage and I said opt-town funk son by Bruno Mars
Because that's my jam
Same delivery you're even fucking laughing at the setup is that this insane
This is really bonkers. Okay. That's not makes sense now and seriously This is the same set we just watched we don't have to watch the whole thing, but the reactions are incredible.
So the grateful dad became very famous
because they used to hand out LSD to the audience
before LSD was illegal.
It's something like that going out here too.
Just think like, guys, everyone really high
on something.
It's like they don't mind what?
That just office, the laughing gas, just like broke.
They don't mind watching the same set
He just shows up
He calls Tyson Punch and everybody gets a blade a love it and it's like just keep drinking. It'll be alright
Don't ask what's in it. I hope this adds to the suit side
I hope this is like a ritualistic thing where they all put on their black jumpsuits and nikes and I just land a bet
I put a pillow over their head
Um either way man Jeff license better than Tom
Yeah, I he just is it and it's because maybe his set shorter fewer words
He gets to his non punchlines quicker than Tom does I agree vote for pity. Thank you. What god?
I really I really thought you were saying that
Thank you. Thank you.
I really thought you were saying that time was better than Jeff when you first came out
here.
That's why I was like, what's going on right now?
This makes a lot more sense.
Yes.
I Jeff is better than Tom.
I think Vicks better than Tom.
I think everyone's one of your top buyers in every single way.
I just thought it was really interesting to take a peek at this guy because we've heard
him so many times on that other show
giving a
laugh right and now from this audience we know he knows how to fake laugh oh yeah, and that's all he
can stop too. He could be good. He's learned all right. That's all I got. Can we move on from the
other asshole? Please happy Hanukkah everyone.
Christian thanks for popping out with us today. Yeah. No, I was
happy to do it. And, uh, you know, I came for the mats, but I stayed for the Heisen. I mean,
that I, I, I can't wait to watch the other eight videos, Vinnie, that you're talking about.
That's the same. Everyone subscribe to his YouTube channel. Let's get his numbers off.
Do you have got 15 subscribers now. You're welcome. Christian.
Yes.
Working people check you out.
Black cast.
Thank you for having me on again.
And you can find me on Twitter and Instagram at ChristianDMZ.
This Friday at 2 PM Eastern, we'll
be doing our live Christmas special of my podcast, The Black
Cast, B-L-A-D-T-C-A-S-D.
And next Monday, right after Christmas, I'll be doing a year end special with
Eric Nagel on its Eric Nagel. So you can find it over there.
So, and I hope to be back in the new year. And Carl, please let
us know how close you are to being on topic time. I hope it
happens in the early part of 2023.
I have been checking. So as you know, Christian, I didn't get back to Harrison Young in time
to get booked for next week. But I have been, well, maybe I can't get on next week. It was
supposed to be this week, but I have been checking my voicemail and my tax messages every day
to not miss it next time. So I hope so too, buddy. Thank you very much.
All right.
Thanks, everybody.
Tell Eric I said, I, Chris, it's always okay seeing,
and it was the same this week.
Oh, okay.
He's not the one blowing people.
I'm okay with that.
Not as pleasant.
Very good.
I'll take it.
All right.
Let's get into our.
Grinch of the week. Grinch of the week.
Now, this cringy of the week I saw coming from multiple people. I'll give
Nicholas Lambert, the credit for it. And actually, I happen to hear this today
because I listened to the show and this was about an hour and nine minutes
into the show. It's called the biggest problem in the universe. Starring Dick Masterson and vetoed his quality and Dick is trying to get
vetoed to say something. And this goes on and on. I'm warning you, this goes on
and on. At its heyday. Like do you remember anyone being like, dude, blockbuster is so cool.
Well, we were a warehouse people. Yeah, which means what?
is so cool. Well, we were a warehouse people. Yeah, which means what? Um, a place where you, it was a place where you could go to Ram movies. It was called warehouse. Yeah. I haven't
heard of that. It was, um, right over here in America, it was in this area, in the California area. No, it was right in this area, right here.
Okay, right here.
You're saying, do you want to elaborate more?
Here's, here's where you are.
It was right here.
Right here was warehouse.
It was, what I'm saying, just following what I'm saying,
it's right here, it was, if this is America, it was right here.
I'm out there. Are you doing a boom? Are you grabbing a boom? No, it was over here. I'm trying to tell you, I'm trying to tell you the location. Okay. Okay. Right here,
over here. This is where you got movies from. Yes. it was, oh, imagine America, okay?
Yeah.
It was right in that area.
Okay.
Do you not get it?
I don't get it.
It's right there.
It's right here.
I'm gonna, you can't have to explain it to me later.
It's right here.
Not on, not on.
You're saying you got movies from here?
Yes.
Where we are right now.
No.
I'm saying that I got it from right here.
From your hand
Tuffy and saying I'm being insane. It's a place. Okay
Your house no
America no the place that I got the movies that we got the movies the computer no in real life in
1993 4 or 5. Yeah.
That's where it was.
Okay.
I'm not gonna get it.
You should.
I'm not gonna get it.
I'm not there.
It's,
this is the chat?
No, what are you talking about?
You're not paying attention.
Don't look at the chat. I'm looking at you and you. You're not paying attention. Don't look at the chat.
I'm looking at you and you're gesturing with your hands at nothing.
Yes.
America.
I'm
mad man.
And that's where you got movies from.
I'm so lost, bro.
Can we move on?
I'm not going to get it.
No, no, no, no, I'm not going to get it. We can't move on. I'm not going gonna get it. We can't move on until you guess the location.
California.
No.
Is it in California?
Look, look what I'm doing.
You're gesturing with your hand.
Right here.
Air?
No.
Is there something about like women? right here. Air? No.
Is there something about like women?
I'm completely lost. Here is.
Here is. Yeah.
This is America.
I can't just keep saying America.
Anyway, moving on, I was trying to get you to say where.
You wanted me to say where?
Where, yeah.
Okay, where?
Now I would say the warehouse.
Okay, because that was the slogan.
So the whole time you were trying to get me to say the word where.
Yeah.
People are complaining about you.
It's the cringe of the week.
The cringe of the week.
Holy shit. I don't know why dick let that go hot for as long as he dead
Holy hell everybody that was something else. Oh, that was rough. I think what we need right now is the old Pelt cleanser Oh
Gucky yeah train my chule you incorporated all right Let's get back to beer on the balcony with Doug good scene because we were last laughed you
John brought on Doug and started making fun of him
for technical problems. And now this is fun because John likes
to pretend like he was such good friends with Doug Goodsine.
Now Doug Goodsine was the guy working the camera a lot of the
times when John would go out and do a celebrity interviews.
So they had projects together. They would work out. All right.
So John likes to talk about,
man, we were just best of buddies and Doug lays it out
for what it really was.
We always just had like a good time together, you know what I mean?
Yeah, we were definitely, we had good times,
we worked and we spent plenty of time socializing
personally with families, dinners, me buying you lots of dinners, me
loaning you up for money, me loaning you more money, me playing through your cabs, me
paying for your clothing.
Yeah, absolutely.
We both friendship.
You know, that's not true.
You know, John, of course not.
I'm totally guessing.
But the first six ones, not the seventh one.
Yeah, so Doug is saying, I didn't buy any clothes.
He didn't buy any clothes.
Right, he didn't buy John's clothes,
but he did all of those other things.
And I know that's true.
And John is laughing off like, yeah, okay.
If you say so.
John thought he was the talent.
He was the one that they had the name recognition.
So when they would go out, it's like, come on, Doug, I'm hanging out with you, man. You can't grab dinner for me. What the
fuck? By the way, I don't have any money for cab for the cab fare. This is so typical. How
awful. Do you think Stuttering John Sloppy's seconds were just to go hang out with him? The girls
that would have been interested in him back in the day. Yeah, it's not great. The stars. That's not a great show. Yeah. By the way,
this is every other conversation he has with the girl. Do you know Jackie Martling? Yeah,
yeah, I work with him. Could you introduce me to him? All right.
I see what this is going. Okay, so now they're going to reminisce about, and we've talked about this
before, for a little while, John was given the afternoon slot after the Howard Stern show on K-Rock
to do a whatever, or either play in music, but it was a lot of like call in and requests.
It was called out to launch.
Right.
And the ratings plummeted from what I understand.
Oh god, it did, they, people hated it.
And all he was doing was playing the music that the music director picked for him and it's still plummeted
Sometimes after a lead in from the biggest show on planet earth
Sometimes he wouldn't even play the music he was supposed to play and that's why he got fired. Oh, he's a rebel
Is it yeah, but this is great because now they're gonna reminisce about how much fun that was and I honestly after hearing this
I'm surprised that the network didn't want him to be
a longer.
I used to love it.
I had my out to lunch show.
I had my, I had my radio show.
And then you would call in as the, as like the angry Jewish guy who was mad or, oh, I'd
have you request like Pearl Jam or something.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let's recreate it.
Hello, you're on the air.
Hi, John. I love your shower. You play some Pearl Jam at my after my wife, Pearl.
Died of my stuff. Would you play some Alice and James from my Kant wife. Her name's Martha.
But she's in chains right now.
Okay.
See, wow, that's not funny at all.
This is what was trying to follow the Howard Stern Show.
And he's actually acting like that was a good bit
that they did.
Remember what I used to have you call it?
Because they're in New York City at K-Rock
and can't get regular colors.
You had to get the guy from a Howard TV.
I just want to say thank you for doing this segment right now.
I forgot how much I enjoyed fucking drop the needle anywhere.
That fucking face.
I know.
Oh no, trust me.
That fucking face.
This is the era of Stuttering John,
and it's too bad that it ended when it did
because he was doing the beer on the balconies
where he's pretending that there are these comedy shows.
Everyone was just laughing their balls off and in return that he has to laugh so
hard at everything even though no one's laughing with him.
I just want everybody to know that Carl's fall from Grace is going to be terrible.
He's going to be doing a podcast going remember when Stuttering John was really bad. Yeah, that was great wasn't it? Let me play a clip of me playing a clip
of him when he sucks and I was good. It's gonna be fun. Oh God. I'm gonna be fucking
good. I'm gonna go go to fall back. God, I got fucking who was the show on the top of
the first page. Hey, you can help me out with that. All right. What I love about John is the beer in the balcony is an interview style show.
And he is a phenomenal interviewer. He always asks the best questions of his guests.
What was the thing that I got mad at you about on a star show? I don't remember.
What did I get mad because I guess you didn't tell me I had something on my face.
I don't know.
I was trying to remember it.
You remember?
Like I said, you set me up because I went in there and I had something on my face.
I had no idea.
I love that story.
Why even bring it up?
Remember the time that I was a slump?
Remember that time I was really pissed off of you?
Like, no, why do you want me to remember that?
I don't.
If you want to like, air some grievances,
we could do that right now,
but you don't even know what you're mad about.
So what's the fucking point?
Wow.
Yeah.
It's pretty great.
All right.
Do you remember the time I was mad at you
because I didn't wash my face and you didn't tell me?
Yeah.
We left our asses.
That's basically what he just said right there.
Yeah.
Fucking working with this man had to be the absolute worst
experience ever.
Well, the good case is screaming because he forgot
to wash his face.
Oh, he's still holding grudge about you remember it
But he remembers being mad and done good. See he's still as mad as I
Do yeah, just John. No, he doesn't know that at all
Remember that time you let me look like a fool. Yeah, uh, Doug fill the blank
Doug the scene
Really sucks that day that he did this.
Go. Now you go.
Yeah, let's see what you're saying.
All right, so what I love about John is aside from being able to ask all the best questions,
he's also an amazing storyteller.
So we're talking about Richie Wilson here, another guy from Howard TV. I was doing, I was doing stand up at size, puttism, Tampa.
And he stayed for like two shows, or he came back, he went to, he went to want it,
they came back to another.
And I do this thing about, you know, I, you know, I do this a bit about my interviews.
He goes, John, so while he's in the audience, he goes, how about OJ? I go, I interviewed OJ, he goes, yeah, you know, I do this a bit about my interviews. He goes, John, so while he's in the audience, he goes, how about OJ?
I go, I interviewed OJ, he goes, yeah, you know, remember?
I go, no, what did I ask him?
He goes, you asked OJ if he was signing a knife.
I go, oh, I remember that.
Oh crap.
You're probably too terrified to
I blocked it out of my mouth. Oh my god
This is not a story that John has been telling
Mm-hmm without the part that Richie reminded him of this he keeps saying he does it in his fucking ass Yeah, I asked OJ to sign my knife and he said oh, I brought my own now that didn't happen
I've had numerous people retouch me and say,
that anecdote never happened.
Now it makes even more sense because
Richie Wilson told him it happened.
How would John get an interview with OJ after the murders?
It didn't happen.
Any conversation they ran with OJ
from the Howard Search Show was long before the murders.
OJ wasn't red carpets after that.
Going around just fucking fielding questions.
With a knife.
If anyone, yeah, if anyone remembers, anything that we could sense a humor about, either it wasn't going around. I was on questions with a knife if I do yeah I don't remember anything that was a humor about either wasn't go rock
I was on the red carpet for Batman returns and what oh Jay came walking up
Yeah, it wasn't the hello Twitter world. Oh Jay that we have today after he got up from that
There was a lot of bullshit had he towards him that he was trying to escape the live light for me
To be fair though, ohJ was kind of around.
He was just playing golf and shit.
He wasn't fielding questions from
Southern John Melendez, I can guarantee you that.
So I thought that was funny because they brought it up,
the reason why they got into that conversation is Doug was going,
you know what, I remember everything that happened
on the stern joke is, because you know, John's going,
remember this is what we're listening to,
and I said, we got it.
Because you know, Ritchie Wilson remembers everything and Chukus, oh yeah, that reminds
me.
Richie told me some bullshit made up story once, and now I pretend that's true.
Okay, cool.
It's weird.
Doesn't even fucking make sense.
Nice to see you, Doug.
All right.
So now, John's going to say his favorite memory with Doug is when they interviewed James
Lovall, and he was in Apollo 13 astronaut.
Now, John has a way of telling this story.
They don't need John.
No, it's not because John, you know, he's the guy who's behind the mic.
He's in front of the camera, not behind the camera.
Like Doug, so he has to scold Doug for ruining this amazing anecdote that he has.
But there he is.
You know, a nice old man.
And there I am asking him,
well, you know, you have a peeing and fucking space,
you know, in your space, you know,
I was just so childish.
It's just the words of those questions
that were written, Jeff and make a duty,
Jeff, you know, did you run a badge?
Oh, that was the last one too
EP you know
But hold on Doug, I'm building up to that so
Oh run off of badge that was gonna be the punchline
Like my badch I was running up to it
I know but I mean all these questions are the same thing
You ever piss in your thing you ever shit day You? You ever jerk off with it? And sometimes it's like, yeah, we
asked about it with your questions. This is just like, whoa, I was getting there. Slowed
out. We're going to milk this one. How many times in his life do you think he's been
in like around parents and like PTA shit? He's like, remember me? I'm the one who asked so
and so and so and so and people just staring him horrified
Yeah, he still thinks that he's just like oh, yeah, it's great John
We love that about you. He's like no, that's inappropriate. Yeah, no
Yes, no fucking filter or we to judge this shit
I have a friend whose daughter went to school with John's kids. I should ask him
If any of that kind of should ever happen I don't ever in a PTA meeting actually now we take that all back
He's children's lives probably not where's your father today? Oh the third role of the tonight show
He scored good tickets. Well, no, he actually works there. That's when they put them so
Does he have a plus one? No, he's on the show every night when they do the audience scan
of the crowd.
He waves at me.
By the way, I want to point out Kiki Loko says, Gary Garber interviewed O.J.
after the murders, not John.
So that would make sense that Richie Wilson remember that he probably was there.
There probably was something that happened, but that was not Southern John, who was
a part of that because any conversation with O.J. happened long after probably was there. There probably was something that happened, but that was not Southern John, who was a part of that, because any conversation with OJ happened long after John was gone. Po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po I talked to every president, why not? I interviewed Bruce Springsteen.
Okay.
So now John's gonna show Doug how to tell this story.
The, then comes the question,
did you ever run off a batch in space?
And then you like couldn't even hold you like,
ah, and I go, and I saw cracking up and I go,
I'm sorry he's laughing and James goes, I'm not laughing.
And it was.
Yeah.
It's fucking guy.
Yeah.
It's fucking guy.
Remember that time I asked a celebrity or ridiculous question and he walked away from me.
Yeah. It's what always happened.
I really think the beer on the balcony could have been really fucking amazing. It is the guess that they gave him when people he never met before.
If every time the guest was someone he had never met before, this show would be fucking Ted Types Faudier because it would just be John Exposing himself to them for the first time.
All of these people all sit there and play member one
with a member one with him.
Well, just like just complete strangers,
I think would have made the show really interesting.
Well, okay, maybe that complete strangers,
but you're right because when he had that movie critic,
was it Gene Siskel?
Yes.
And he was like trying to, he's like,
oh my gosh, you gotta see this thing in Paul Figgie.
He's like, okay John. It wasn't Siskel, he's long dead. Yeah, but it was like trying to he's like, Oh my gosh, you got to see this thing in pop. He's like, okay,
John Sisko. He's long dead. Yeah, it was just a guy who worked with them was yeah, I can't think of it. And he was the due to
Replaced the fuck it. Eber. He replaced Eber. There we go. Roper Richard Roper. Richard Roper. Okay. I got there. That makes sense. So, uh, yeah,
Richard Roper on and he just was talking about all the things that he do It was trying to make it sound good. What you were just explaining is exactly what happened with the guy's looking at him like
Why are we talking about this? What's going on right now?
Because John was just trying to make himself look famous and smart in front of him
It's somebody if they call the cold open rich and it's the thing before the credits on a TV show
Do you know I got Saturday night like yes, yes, we know.
John, she's a script.
And I told Quentin Tammantito got to just slow it down a little bit and stick to the script.
I told him you can't keep ramble down and not quitting.
You idiot.
We don't need sure in probably a I'm the writer.
He is a magical with people that he doesn't know.
I know.
Many, you're talking to the guy
who discovered this first.
I know, it's amazing.
I love it.
I'm sorry.
I just can't stand like these things
with the people who know him, just humor him.
Well, it's so boring.
Because this conversation has already happened 34 times.
Right.
He gets on, grillo or Doug Goodstein
or these guys who will just keep coming back and they
don't have any more stories to tell. We got it. Yeah okay. They bet I mean they don't ever tell
any stories anyway. John tells the stories back at them and they go oh yeah we were scraping the
bottom of the barrel here where he's like remember that time I was mad at you like no why
she's a scrap I don't know man but what I like is when John gets distracted. So in this clip, he's going to get distracted by his heart
seltzer because he was drinking a berry flavor.
It's ultra remember it was Barry on the balcony.
You can't with that.
Winnie.
So watch this.
He takes the seven.
He's just like, wait, what the fuck is going on here?
It sounded exactly like he said.
Where we got a storm show.
So I don't know that that that I don't know if you remember this one, Doug.
This was uh, boy, that thought I was wildberry. It's black cherry. Okay. Um, did you see that? He's like, no, I'm talking to him. What is that point? In my mind, it's not cool.
I'm talking to you. What is that point?
In my mind, it's not cool.
It's not cool.
You know, the soldiers on sale.
You know, you get both gays away in a second.
You can't fool me.
Do you think that he bought the silksuit
because he was trying to cut back a little bit?
No, we got it from one.
He said that earlier in the show,
he had borrowed it from his neighbor
because he ran out of beers.
He thought he bought a case.
Gotcha.
I thought he bought a case of beer. He's still figuring out the technology. He thought he bought a case. Got you. I thought I'd buy a case of beer.
He's still figuring out the technology. That's all confused. All right. This is a great anecdote.
This is a pretty example what you're talking about, Mini. Okay. Where you just tell stories
at people. So he's very proud of himself for this one. I don't know if this one aged so well.
When I think back to the Howard Stern show, there are bits that are
legendary. And then they're missing it. Didn't age so well. This might be one of the ones
that I'd leave off of the best of real, if I were a job.
But I kept asking him douchebags as what and and then I was like, Bullseye, cause what?
And he kept on going, what? And again, you're laughing, you're fucking it.
And here's a war hero.
And you're laughing, you're ass up.
And I keep going, like, I'll ask him a question,
and I go, boss, I said, what?
And he can't say, I can't say.
And it went on for like five minutes.
Oh, my God.
And we were both fucking laughing.
And I think that's why that we became so close because
Because we had the same sense of humor and we're there doing this shit and we know we're fucking so
fucking wrong
We left our asses off. Okay, I left my ass off
Three times of that sorry and then I said douchebags is what I said bolsa
X is what these are pretty good jokes and his funeral someone's gonna feel the only thing
that I'm able to say is well he did laugh a lot.
I'll look at being able to say.
Well it seemed like he was having fun so there's that good for him.
Alright this is the last clip I have from this and this is just again, John brings out the greatest hits and a lot of times in comedy
You want the act to be new
If you've already heard the joke not as funny the second time third time fourth time tell that to Jeff Heisen tell that to Jeff Heisen
Two is 40 tips subscribers. I look at set, but somehow he's gonna have 15th
of that. So I'm getting out there somehow.
Stuttering John is able to say the same thing over and over again.
And it kills. He's so great at it.
I mean, it's a question, Doug. Like how do you react?
And how do you get like when you saw Triumph the insult, you know,
dog and and all in G. Borad, or even between
two ferns, right?
With Zach Alphonum.
Do you ever go like, hey, we did that way, way before he's got, he thinks he's fucking
Zach Alphonakis now too.
Holy shit, the bull balls on this guy.
All right, so he's asking Doug,
he wants to get Doug to agree with him.
Now, listen the way he goes about this.
I would say if I were, what was his name?
Daryl Brooks.
Daryl Brooks.
I would say objection leading the witness on this one.
And that you stare.
Go like, hey, we did that way, way before.
These guys are fucking doing arts.
These guys are doing what we did back in the day,
like, because I do.
I go, hey, try and be in some dog.
It's just me with a puppet, you know what I mean?
Yeah, I don't know.
And you listen, as long as you know,
that you're sure that you're the innovator of it and creator of it,
which, you know, I guess you can figure out by dates, who cares, you know, what does
I say?
Imitation is the best floor form of flattery.
So, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Now, very diplomatic answer from Senator Pussy, you have my voice.
Very diplomatic answer from Doug Goodstein.
Great response to you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're not gonna go along with that fight.
You're in your logic.
I guess we'll move on that, you asshole.
We're gonna ruin that bit.
I just think it's hilarious to me that a guy like Doug Goodstein
wouldn't say, well, John, this shit's been going,
first of all, you didn't even create that.
That was Howard's idea.
I figured he'd go out and ask these questions to people.
And Howard didn't even have that either.
This would be going out for a very long time.
And Zach Elf and Zach is between two ferns.
What are you fucking insane?
Not the same.
So they're close to the same thing.
Oh, yeah.
She's not the same thing.
God.
He thinks that fucking newscasters are fucking ripping them off
This fucking web brain is
Yeah, general GK and the Charles Bay weather from Channel 4 stole my act
And they posted it on here Steve Allen man on the street
I mean this just been going on a lot before Howard started said our job or doing it in the fact that
No one will tell John to stop comparing yourself or being upset
about an Olig and Borat is insane to me.
Why wouldn't one person think, John, you sound so stupid when you say that.
You have to stop saying that.
Those are very tales of people who made movies around the shit.
That would involve people who care about it, listening to what he has to say.
That is correct. There's another guy who's not
surrounded by anyone who cares about him.
It's time to mock, zoom mock.
And I have to play for you the latest misery loves company because honestly what Bob
Levy and Kevin Brennan are doing to Chad Zumaq.
They're doing our job for us.
We could probably just take a step back
and let that rip on Chad.
If you were to say to Chad, come on WATP Woody.
I think so, yeah.
Okay, and I'll show you why I think that in a little bit.
I'm just curious.
That's a tease because he did say something
on his show, Sit Down Zumaq.
This week, that's interesting.
I don't listen.
I know.
I know.
My buddy Drew Lane was something we notes today.
So I checked it out.
Actually, Cardiff was a guest on his show.
I said that,
I'm a check.
Okay.
But let's get into the Mizri Loves company.
Let's see how this episode starts off.
And I'll say it because it's playing his day.
Chad's a fucking idiot. Also, uh, look what happened to the Whitney comic sisters.
So he just opens up the show. Listen, I'll just say it. Chad's a fucking idiot. Also, he just has a sit there and take this. It's so funny.
But why is he wearing that hat? What the hell? What else are you supposed to say to him? He explains, it's like his mud hat,
you know, like they were talking about,
oh, you're in the mud, you're a mud shark
or whatever the fuck they were saying.
He's running with it.
So he's trying to embrace it.
Yeah, he's trying to embrace that whole thing.
Please, let's take this shit.
Right, no one respects him.
Bob Lee, he tells him,
multiple times, we're doing that stupid hat.
What are you doing that stupid shitty hat?
You're looking at an idiot.
But honestly, we could do five hours on this episode.
I'm just gonna play a couple of things
because they're just ripping out of the whole time.
It's crazy.
It's like two hours.
I'm just ripping on Chad.
So it's our about Whitney Cummings.
And now Chad always says that he was friends
with Whitney Cummings.
And I believe that's true back when they were both
open-mikers in LA.
And so they would hang around together.
Now obviously Whitney's got everything to do
with the deal with Chad too, Mac these days.
But Chad's gonna start reading DMs
that he got from Whitney Cummins.
And at one point he's even showing his phone.
Stop texting.
He's even showing his phone.
This isn't Whitney.
Ha ha ha ha.
Chad, what are you doing with that fucking hat?
I still can't get over it.
Dude, I'm a mud shark.
Oh, I'm gonna look at this.
So what did she say?
Are you doing a prime McCarthy?
Are you won't tell us unless we ask you?
We're going to eat.
I'm going to read it on Patreon.
Yeah, get close.
Yeah, do it on the Patreon.
Hey, Kevin.
She writes this out and says, hey, I'm sure this is pointless,
but just curious,
what's up with you?
I thought we were legit friends,
or at least I thought we were.
What happened?
I'm kind of unclear because I thought we were both good buds.
I expect nothing in return.
I'm sure you'll just publicly make fun of this,
but I want to know what's going on with you personally.
I love you.
I have nothing but fond memories of driving to open mics together and being cool. We were always so cool.
We get six months ago. This was like, he making a joke. They get up a mic six months ago.
Oh, very good.
Very good. So there's a lot going on. I'm just like picking his spots and just crushing
Chad. I would chance he gets hilarious. But what you're what chance reading there? I
wouldn't be reading on a show is Whitney going, what's wrong with you? We used to get along.
I don't know what this is all about. You're being a dick and he's just sitting there.
What do you do to Whitney to get her to send him out.
He talks shit about everyone.
Okay.
It's all he does is shit talk this guy.
You think he's winning in life because he's just shit
talked everyone.
I'm not going to play their game.
This is a narrative.
Do you remember that works for like two months with Charlie
should?
It didn't though.
Charlie should be telling us the worst parts of his life.
Well, what I'm saying is it appeared that it was working
for two months.
He went on tour and stuff. And, everything just completely fell to fuck apart.
It goes.
But it's how that works.
I feel like Chad is just playing that playbook.
Correct.
That failed playbook.
Yeah, he's not a smart guy.
He's not doing a good job with this because literally he just read in that DM when he's
like, you're probably just going to read this on your show and make it public, but I'm
trying to get through to you as a person.
We were friends. What the fuck? And and here's Chad reading it like she predicted?
He's a stupid ass and a stupid fucking
Much our cat I just show her his friends just have them there to make fun of us
That's the only rule he has on the show right now. So you think he worms if they made him
Like oh, he's got he worms chat
I'm going to be worse, Chad. What have you got?
What's got you, Thorne, Chad?
He's the worst.
I got five plugs in that show.
So this is now.
They're trying to egg on Chad to call Whitney.
And Bob gets a pretty good zinger in here.
I literally have not spoken to her.
Like I said, since a DVD release party.
Just, you don't even say you're on a podcast.
Just talk to her normal.
Don't even say I'm here.
But is it illegal to record somebody?
Yeah, a little bit.
It's a little bit.
No, it depends what state you're in.
Deaf.
I just got out of legal problem.
I know California is, it is illegal,
but that's of there calling you. I don't know about New illegal, but that's if they're calling you
I don't know about I mean I could check with legal real quick if you want
Yeah, I think you should because yeah, I think you can call anyone
Florida you can do anything you can kill your baby and that's your call you're calling from Florida
I think everything goes there. Yeah, right. I mean you can still credit cards that I don't even put you in jail
I think anything goes there. Yeah, right?
I mean, you can still credit cards there.
They don't even put you in jail.
And so they're still ragged about the credit card thing.
And I want to point out why this is.
Chit is an idiot who admitted it was getting to him.
As soon as he said, all right,
so I went to credit card jokes, guys.
It's getting old.
And like everyone's like,
oh, he doesn't like the credit card jokes.
What do I smell blood?
Yeah, no shit.
Yeah, the shark here is Bob Levy.
You know what I'm saying.
I think that's not the asshole at the shitty hand.
That's not the shark in this one.
Hey, who do you think the suckers on this show?
You sure right?
What's your left stop that with you?
And you had a great white and the dud shark.
All right, so at one point Chad calls Whitney and then it's how
literally she picks up and he hangs up real quick and he says that it was her
voicemail or something like that. So there's they rip on him quite a bit for
being afraid of talking to girls. But this is great because Bob again with the
interventions because remember Chad has been saying he's going to stop drinking in 2023.
Okay.
He's going to totally change everything he's doing.
Like right now, oh, drinking all day every day.
No problem.
Yeah.
Come 23.
It's always best to binge really hard right before you quit.
All right.
So this is Bob's point here.
You're still afraid to call a girl.
I just like I haven't spoken to her.
Like I'm nervous.
Like you know, like, I haven't spoken to her. I'm nervous.
You know why?
Okay, I haven't spoken to Nick Swartz and either.
Have a drink.
You're not drinking today.
Yeah, that's the problem.
Yeah, cheers.
Oh, yeah, okay.
Okay, okay.
Is it sober Tuesday?
No.
I'm a two, two, two, two, two, two, two, two, three, alcohol free.
It's never gonna happen, dude.
I don't know why you think that. You can't drink like a fish until the fucking, the end of the year. I'm a two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two two Neko look you drink a few drinks you get really fucked up and then you start sending crazy text messages to people
To me to Kevin Kevin why do you get blocked from Kevin?
That's right. Yeah, Kevin. Sorry about that. I went through a difficult year last year the whole year
It's a spherical this show is great. I never reviewed it a couple of weeks ago.
But if it's just, if they rebrand this is the, we all rag on Chad Show.
I'm watching every episode three times in a row.
I agree.
I'm going to miss something.
You know how you know that cigarettes are different than alcohol?
How do you know?
Because when you're going through withdrawals and you go to the hospital, they don't have
like a fridge full of cigarettes, some art boroughs for you.
Good boy.
Because you'll die. They don't have those. This guy's going to need at least some for you. Good boy. You'll die They don't have those guys you need at least a marble light or he's not gonna make it Jesus
Drug it's hilarious so
Apparently because he was afraid to talk to Whitney
These guys start ragging out about April Aaron silto Aaron's wife Yeah. Like, dude, how are you gonna fuck April?
If you're afraid to talk to Whitney,
how the fuck would they call him?
Like, they're calling him out for this.
And this is like Chad's big victory.
He's like, oh, they're afraid of me now,
because I said I was gonna fuck April.
And I was like, you can't even call a girl.
You're threatening to rape a woman, so of course,
people are not happy with you.
Yeah.
But it does stand.
You still can't call a girl.
They call him the easiest rapist. We're like,
yeah, you've got them. There's so many funny jokes. That's good for all of it because we got to move on.
But this is a fun one because this is where they're goofing on Chad.
This sucks so much. Yeah, they're talking about showering and this is a pretty good one.
So before you go to a show, you don't take a shower?
If I have a show, yeah, yeah, for sure.
So you haven't taken a shower in a couple of weeks.
You know, you shower three times a month.
He just walked to that, refucking what?
Yeah.
It's just so fucking funny.
Because the look at both Kevin's face and Bob's face.
What they smell blood like, boo.
Did he just say that? They look like Cardiff getting one over us.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, man.
So this is now talking about Chad's girlfriend, quote unquote,
because apparently Chad has her head girlfriend
and she's not a comedian.
Very. Which is comedian. Very.
Which is important.
Anyway,
Chad, you ever get fucked in the ass, speaking of sleepovers,
you ever get a question, yes?
Just like three times.
Fuck no.
Come on, man.
No, no, no, girls ever try to peg your none, nothing like that.
No, that's my thing.
That's not your thing. That's no one's thing until you until you do it then you're like, oh, this is this is definitely my thing
This is my new thing get paid I've definitely had the finger in the tongue. That's about it
From a lady by the way, oh this that teacher
No one knows she drove into a tree
teacher? No one knows she drove into a tree. If you'll remember, Chad Clay is using a pretty horrific accident recently, where the girl was driving. He was just at his knees in the passenger seat
with his ass face. All right, so here's another cigarette we're talking more about Chats girl friend here. I rather taste bark than Chad
The bunch of shout-out how how personal did it get with that lady? It was pretty cool
She's she was it was nice because she's not in a business. Thank God. It was just you This guy's killing over here. What did he do?
He was so happy.
The smile on his face, I'm gonna play that again.
The smile on his face, what he knew, he was gonna say it.
He's like, oh, this is gonna kill.
I rather taste bark than Chad.
I have to say it.
Chad, how personal did it get with that lady?
It was pretty cool.
It was nice because she's not in a business.
Thank God it was just you.
This guy's killing over here.
As I mentioned on sit down, Zumaq, we had Cardiff on there.
And Cardiff, look at everyone loves Cardiff.
He's incredible.
He's killing it.
And so we kind of took over the show a little bit and started interviewing Chad and giving him some advice,
which I thought was good,
because you know, Curtis obviously doing a lot better
than Chad is at podcasting these days.
So he's out there with some advice now.
You'll notice in this video,
Mr. Yolks Company Chad's holding on to a microphone.
Okay.
You don't see a lot of podcasters do that.
No.
You know, it's not natural.
And you might like move the mic away from your mouth
and it's not gonna sound as you get your finger noises on the mic
What's also a shitty microphone?
That's not the thing looks like it was attached to a cassette player at one point. Hey, good looking. What could be going back to pick you up later?
Do you want to hear your voice on the radio?
I'm gonna stand up comic and I just kind of like this is what I do on stage so I want to do it in podcasting. And plus when everybody starts out, I'm gonna, I'm a standup comic and I just kind of like, this is what I do on stage.
So I want to do it in podcasting.
And plus when everybody started podcasting like Theo Vaughn and everybody, they were all
doing the same fucking set and the dumb drop mic and it was bothering me.
I was just like, everyone's copying each other.
I hate that's the only problem with all this bullshit online is everyone's copying each
other. It's just copycats
I've been on radio shows before every single one they have microphones set up on stands
It's not fucking copying each other. They have good equipment
It's going out over a frequency
Yeah, Chad remembers working in radio
People who have jobs what a weird fucking thing to say. Like I hold on to
my microphone because everyone else has nice equipment. They're just copying each other.
Tom idea. I hate that's the only problem with all this bullshit online is everyone's copying
each other. It's just copycats. It's the, where's the originality? You know, it's good for,
it's good for audio quality. Um, yeah, I know, I know the benefits of a microphone. Come on, but I might stand.
I'm like, stand. Yeah.
I just like to hold it.
Cardinals like, try to explain.
I was like, all right.
Okay.
I know.
I know.
They're all copy each other.
But it's actually the right way to do it.
You know, and really the short answer is I just like to hold it.
Right.
Yes.
And he can't afford to stand more importantly.
You notice that like even with the simplest of questions,
it's everybody else's fault?
Yeah. That's amazing.
He throws a feel-va, like that was just a fucking question about like,
why don't you have a mic stand?
And he has to start calling people out.
Because everybody's a phony.
Fucking holding Kyle field over here.
It's fucking child.
That's hilarious.
And this guy Tyler is such an NPC. This guy is a
dog. He is a nothing. So at one point, actually a few points in this show, here's
what example. We've got a website car. Oh, yes, I've noticed that. Brilliant wedding
photographer. I'm not going to take that away from him. At one point Chad throws
it to Tyler and now we get to see his dynamic personality.
I'm full display.
Tyler, how do you think this is going?
Good, good.
I, you know, I already said the only part that makes me worried,
but when it comes to Aaron and April,
that's, that's,
game on, I think so. I mean,
I wouldn't do anything crazy.
Well, it's great to know that Tyler and
Cardiff are better people than me.
Everyone is. Everyone's better people.
An actual fucking potato.
Yeah, it's a better human.
I mean, you are better people than you.
Tyler, what do you think about this? Yeah, just, um know, I think that, yeah, don't do anything crazy.
I mean, that's good, right?
I think the thing you said when this episode started, they're like, yeah, there's all these
shows goofing out.
I mean, what do you think about that?
Tyler's like, I don't know.
I'm not paying taxes.
Wait, what's your role here?
Tyler, what are you doing?
I think he's just the AV guy.
Because obviously Zuma can't set this up. I think he's just this fucking a.v. guy who they put him on camera
He's a producer
I fucking hate those people just sit there on the microphone
It's fucking producer. I'll do nothing on camera. It's amazing. I'm gonna buy watching you
Is it our producer does more than the Tyler, that's the shudder.
Yeah, can he shoot the fuck out of a wedding?
I doubt it.
Yeah.
Probably could, not with the camera.
I could shoot up a wedding.
I wouldn't do that.
I wouldn't.
I wouldn't do anything crazy.
I wouldn't do anything crazy.
It wouldn't go to do anything crazy.
I didn't know it sounds too crazy.
Alright.
But you know whatever.
Cardiff asks, she had the question,
are you coming to Rochester?
Are you coming to Davilcon?
Let's find out.
Are you coming to Rochester?
Are you really coming to Rochester?
I'm about 90% sure I'm going.
Okay.
90, but it's just,
and it's not a slight at call or anybody else.
I just, it's Rochester, man, it's like,
I don't take that personally.
I'm not a huge fan of the weather he either, sir.
It's just a slip, yeah.
We like it, asshole.
He's not the mayor.
He might act like it, but.
I don't control the weather.
The else, I just, it's Rochester, man, it's like,
I know it's not cool.
But, you know, I'm actually friends with Shuley and Bob Levy as much as all this crazy
stuff goes on.
I've known them for a long time.
So, I don't curl, you know, he's on the pile on with me.
I don't necessarily hate Carl at this point, but I just, interesting.
He doesn't necessarily hate me.
Well, let me ask why I'm offended.
I'm never mad.
Right?
That was the same tone that he had with that one.
Can I ask you a direct question?
Of course.
Do you hate Chad Zuma?
No, I don't hate any of these people.
Okay.
But I will say that I thought this was very interesting
because this is the first time that Chad is doing something smart.
He's trying to defuse the situation here because at first he came in and he went,
"'Curls gonna try to turn me into the next stuttered shot or one of these recurring characters?'
I'm not that guy, I'm too funny, I'm too tailated.
Now fucking 30 parody songs later and 500,000 views on YouTube videos, he's going,
"'Curls, alright, he's cool, I don't know what that guy is.'
I feel like he's growing this up person, He's wearing a normal hat in this video.
He's a normal head on. Yeah. Yeah.
He looks like a person. So that's good. So I'm actually impressed because I wasn't expecting
Chad to do the right thing and say the right thing. It's almost like you took my advice and I was
talking about how whatever your instinct is, Chad, do the opposite because everything you've
done so far after this point in your life has gotten you here. So start doing the opposite of what you're doing.
And I think maybe he's heating that advice.
Are you gonna let Chad Zumak hijack Davokon?
He's not gonna hijack Davokon, Davokon.
Would you like to be a part of it?
No.
Okay.
He's gotta sit in the audience.
Yeah, of course, he's gotta sit in the audience.
He's not part of the show.
Yeah, he's a member of the press, remember. Yeah, he's gotta blog. I mean, you know how many people were involved in the show. Yeah, of course he's got to sit in the audience. He's a member of the press. I remember. Yeah, he's got a blog. I mean, you know how many people were involved in the show.
Too many. Yeah, we're at Max capacity. I'm actually about to like you to drop out. I know. It's
already fucking too many people. I want to hear people complain about having to be the last comic.
It's Rochester in February. I've stayed home. No offense to Vinnie, but Rochester in February.
I mean, Vinnie, no offense, but Rochester.
I'm very offended.
Actually, you're the ass who's from San Diego.
It actually is your fault, I have to say.
This is kind of fun.
This is a, I like that dad wears an out of this
is getting in the mix on this stuff because,
well, they're a little bored.
Yeah, really, that's pretty,
it's so pretty active over there.
But check out Chad sent out a tweet, because he's pretty it's so pretty active over there, but check out
Chad sent out a tweet Because he's always promoting let me guess please clap. He's a promoting a stop. So he says port Charlotte comedy zone is number 21st through 24 through that's something
Ekron Kent falls funny stop summer 26th 27th
27th my birthday show so it will be a shit show
Homecoming see you then God bless happy holidays. Oh, he's not a show. So it will be a shit show. Homecoming. See you then. God bless. Happy holidays.
At least he's not a liar. So he's promoting his show. That was at this point 20 hours ago.
Remember, he's got how many followers? 17.8000. And he has one retweet, seven likes, six
comments, all six of those comments are trolls goofy at them and
Dan was out of his poses out there when a 20 hour tweet wrote in your birthday
comedy show proves the 17.7 thousand every 17.8 thousand followers are
probably purchased
hmmm where's that side whistle crash yeah where's that side that was so sad? Might want to cue the slide was on that one.
All right.
Oh, wow.
All right, I have a couple really good song parodies are coming in.
I mentioned that this week is the last week for song parodies.
Get them in by Friday, early afternoon,
because we're recording 3.30 PM Eastern on Friday.
We're doing our best of 2022.
Everyone's going to be bringing in their worst podcasts of the year. I'm doing the teaser segment
earlier. I apologize. We're going to produce your Chris Vinny, trucker Andy,
crotch myself, all bringing in what we think is the worst podcast that we reviewed in 2022.
So get your song parody. We'll also be declaring the winner of the song parody contest.
But first, Adam Thoreau sent in a song. This is to Noah Fax's song, Franco on American.
I don't remember that song, which is a good song. Yeah. If you're a Noah Fax fan like myself,
this is a pretty good uh pretty good little parody.
I like the thought of stealing credit cards. at what I bought never thought about the problems of
Ever getting caught 15 bucks at Walgreens fight a min shop a hundred bucks of target. Oh shit here come the cops
No, that's no way to act to mock is a piece of shit. No way to act to mock is a piece of shit
No way to act to mock is a piece of shit. That's no way to act to mark. Zoom.
Mark is a piece of shit. Very well done.
Deep cut. Great pack. Yeah, it is a deep cut. So this is two weeks in a row or at least two shows in a row.
We had some deep cuts. We ain't and now no facts, but my sample approval on both of those.
This is one that's a little bit more mainstream coming coming in with Tony Musgrat once again, Tampa Roads.
["Tampa Roads"]
["Tampa Roads"]
["Tampa Roads"]
["Tampa Roads"]
Almost heaven, planet fitness,
rooting through lockers, duffel bags of rich kids Camera blind spots
Makes my income grow
Can't leave the state of Florida
I'll never see the snow
Credit cards
They make me hard
When I hear
Catch your charge When I hear, catch a charge, playin' a fitness
The holy mecca of credit fraud, credit fraud
Going on a podcast, drunk in the morning
I arrive at a liquor store to keep the teetos flowing
We'd at Steel Tone, doxx's family
Barrowing my friend's car and crash into a tree tae for roads
just take me home
it was my friend
who drank and drove
just to mark a selfish asshole
with stupid clothes
he's comedy clothes.
Well done.
Very well done.
Tony Voss Greg, I'm gonna give you another submission.
We're gonna have a tough time.
Can I pick you to the winners?
I guess I've been processing my thoughts
listening to these songs.
Yeah.
What really bothers me about this whole situation
is after watching Cardiff
ask him the question about the microphone. Yes. And he goes, I don't want to copy everybody
else. Everybody else is doing everything. He's always going on about how he's so rich
ones so different. Correct. Yeah. You're the community without jokes. He's different.
He's different that he's everything he's got to do is different. But you realize this whole
thing started when he goes, Hey, everybody, I'm jumping on the stuttering John bandwagon.
Wow.
Good observation.
The whole thing started.
That's a really good observation.
I'm deciding to copy everybody.
Well, it started with him saying that,
Refter saying that the king and queen of sack accounts
are frank and Chrissy.
When he's the one, it's improvement in sack accounts.
Yeah, that's not very original, Chad, you with your
eye accounts. Yeah, it just, it just fucking smething
the head. I'm like, wow, that's a good boy.
That's a real fucking dummy. Hey, I got a quick
Opie thing in here because, brother man, brother man.
At Goodison Ian, this is going to the library where ghost blusters was filmed
Only the O's are gonna bear some stuff on his own stream like this. I'm trying to interview ghosts
I can't end until I find the famous opening scene to ghost blusters
I'm a famous tiktok guy. Let me just get there.
There's no tiktok in or videos or photos.
A lot of this room.
What's up?
Why?
This is from Ghostbusters though.
Actually, I saw him in the back.
Oh, can I go to the Ghostbusters room?
Of course, they know.
So we're going to be presenting your research at the moment.
There's a tour at 3 o'clock.
Oh, no.
I don't have time for tours.
I'm a very busy man. But thank you very much for stopping me.
Now I'm on their radar.
I want an idiot.
There's a guy following me now.
I can't end until I find the food.
Oh, I'm so busted to go there.
Yeah, I can't dip it in here.
Oh, it means a special kind of adult.
It's the, wow.
Why would you post that up on your YouTube?
Yeah, he's definitely not gonna be around
if people are studying and learning things.
It's not here.
It's not his fucking seed, man.
This is a very short video that I saw on Twitter
from at MKE Lifestyle Pick.
Cheers.
Cheers.
Cheers.
Cheers.
Cheers. Cheers. Very well Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Did we catch you in a bad time? Yeah, well, I mean, keep, I keep having a bail you out on these reviews at the last
minute.
I appreciate your help on that.
I would like a little advanced notice next time, but that's fine.
I know.
Well, listen, Cardiff, I've been in Communica with the other review girls and I keep getting
these promises.
Okay, I've given you the solution here.
The put me in charge. Put you a
general Wrangler and I'll take care of it. Mmm. Kind of salary you need for that sort
of work, Carter. More than producer Chris. Oh, shit. I'm getting good. I'm getting
more. I'm getting more. Alright, that's it. The budget. Okay, we can, that's it the budget. Okay, we can make that one. Cardiff has a favorite nation's clause. Yes. Alright, I think it's time for... card of electric and the card of electric youtube channel subscribe today okay
Carl and co-host who said our first entry who said everyone's entitled to be
an idiot that's how I feel who said all? Alright, everyone's in total to be an idiot. That's how I feel. It's got some Jerry Banefield vibes to it.
I'm gonna go with... I gotta remember all the people were thinking about that.
Okay, so we were just... Patrick, Michael, Stutter, John, Melendez. Greg Opie Hughes. Right.
And I guess Chad Suckmawks in there.
Oh, are you saying ZumaX down anything anymore?
No, he's in there. He's in there.
I just feel bad about it now. Cause you guys are BFFs.
Yes. You're the weird position right now.
Refredding Chad Suckmawks.
I'm friends with everybody. Yes, you are.
That is true.
Hey, I, I, I, I, Card it doesn't have an enemy in the world does he?
I don't know. I don't know.
That was like, Christopher Christ doesn't like that. What?
But it's all because Christopher Christ is jealous of him and his producing skills. I'm going to Jerry badfield. What do you think, Vinnie?
Okay, so I feel like this is a Patrick Michael or an OP. Yeah, I was thinking OP. I'm gonna lean with OP. Okay. I
Went bad field. All right to band fields and a Greg Hughes.
Let's find out.
One, two, three.
Let him go.
Look, everybody's entitled to be an idiot.
I don't know.
Everybody's on it.
We're got your body.
Yeah.
I mean, it's the truth, John.
It's the truth.
Everyone's a title to be an idiot.
That's how I feel with these trolls that come in the room.
You know what I mean?
It's a hit.
Right.
Let me fucking idiot.
Yeah, right.
Let him go.
It's your fucking, I mean, if you want to look like a dumb fuck,
hey, more power to you.
Our next entry.
Okay.
Okay. So, celery, John, and Joe Biden,
I forgot Tony Michaels existed until I just heard his voice.
Michael, Michael Sosnowski was in there as well.
Oh, that's right. That's right.
Let's stop for the real guy.
Who got the point there?
I believe Cardiff got the point there.
Oh, okay.
Good one, Cardiff. Guys, let's fucking concentrate oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh I know who said it's not Vinnie who would say that the strongest fat guy that they know
you know it's got to be one of those out of context it's a bit of a top-mire's I'm
going Banfield okay yeah that could be another it just sounds like a wacky
dumb thing he would say okay what do you think? It's a great challenge. I'm going stuttering, John. Okay, against the misdirection.
All right, let's go.
One, two, three.
They look like Bert.
They drink like Bert.
They live that lifestyle, but they also think,
Hey, I'm the strongest fat guy I know.
I'm the most athletic guy who doesn't do anything athletic right
So I'm going to go through these challenges and I guess the fans could vote on who moves on and it's like a survivor thing meets
Hey, let's see if this giant belly on these guys doesn't affect their athleticism because we've seen it work
Our next all right, that's another point for Carter Patrick Michael coming in
So that's two for me time out bird christian
Yeah, I'm zero at this fight, but that's unfortunate the night is young as they say so
We shall see what happens
All right, let's keep going with the game., I was just checking to make sure we didn't have, uh,
I need reinforcements.
I mean, more people picking people's, I just hope they,
that someone's able to come out and join the stream.
Because the more people we have, it gets carried with the better chance we have.
But alright, let's go guys.
Let's get our shit together.
Dentry.
Who said...
You don't see people getting in a lot of fights if they're smoking weed it's the alcohol
who said oh my gosh I want to say OP or stuttering John I'm gonna go I'm gonna go
stuttering John on this one what do you you think, man? I'm going to take OP again.
I feel very unoriginal, but it does like OP.
No, it's okay.
I took OP.
All right.
Damn it.
If you guys are around, we'd piss, because I did say OP.
One, two, three.
Well, that's the whole argument.
There is a pro weed argument.
You don't see people getting a lot of fights if they're on, you know, if this smoking weed, the alcohol is when they start getting in
the fights.
It's true.
Absolutely true.
Yeah.
Of course, not me, because, you know, I'm a lovable drunk. It doesn't matter.
Oh, my God.
We've seen what John does. So it parks behind him at the pub that loses this fucking
mat. He's a lovable drug.
You know, I really didn't care about losing the cartos,
but now you're in, you're beating me this sucks.
I know.
I'm doing a show with Chrissy Mayer tonight at nine Eastern.
We're gonna reminisce about our favorite moments
from settling John over the last year.
And one of the clips that I grabbed was him
getting kicked out of the bar.
By the bar to do say, I'm not talking to you, you don't need to be here!
That's like a great.
What are my favorite things?
But no, Jon's totally cool when he's drunk.
He's totally chill.
And high, he's totally cool when he's drunk and high.
100%.
I'm like, I love you, man.
He did!
And I follow a lot.
I'm a big follower And I follow a lot. I'm a big follower. I'm really a follower.
Our next entry.
Lumsy.
Who said when you have a very liberal company and you got an Eagle Maniac that comes in?
Who said it?
Oh god, I can only imagine this is about Elon Musk, but I shouldn't even think that's
the case.
I'm gonna go with Tom Myers.
What do you think, winning Patrick Michael
talking about our bees? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Yes, so you have three different ones. I agree one two
Three I don't know how Elon Musk survives everybody just bailing on
On Twitter. I'm talking about the employees. I'm always just rooting for us versus card I've been this funny. I used to be competitive with a Chris and I'm like, ah good someone's got to get it
The world is being Chris enough.
Part of it is going to go down.
That's the problem when you have a very liberal company and you've got an ego maniac that
comes in to try to run the goddamn thing.
I mean, it's like, I want to say, clash of the Titans, but I mean, obviously Elon Musk
has the upper hand, but he just rubbed everybody the wrong way and they're like
We're out of here. What mistakes are always the worst is that what they were like
They were like on fire like a clash of the Titans was it's
You got a bus versus Carol and accounting wow to clash of the Titans that one hey Carol
Buzzfers is Carol in accounting. Wow, I want to clash with the Titans that one. Hey Carol. Yarrradi!
Our next entry. Who said it? I kept a pair of her underwear. Who said it?
Tom Myers. It's got to be Tom Myers. Oh no!
Chad Zubak. Chad Zubak. You know what? What do you think? Tom Myers. It's gotta be Tom Myers. Oh no!
Chad Zubak!
Chad Zubak!
You know what?
What do you think?
I was gonna say Chad Zubak too.
But then Tom Myers, I'm like, eh, we didn't say little, little league boys pants.
It's at her underwear, so I'm gonna go with Zubak.
Alright, and I'll go with the Jerry Banned Fue.
Alright.
One, two, three.
Like any break up, maybe something their
Republican party wants to keep in order to
remind itself of a few good times they had with Tom.
They may hang on to a sliver of the
fanatic. I like that car. Right now, much like my
end in my last relationship. I got the
parable.
Just keep this between us. As she my last relationship, I got the parable. Oh, I just keep this between us as she doesn't know I have them.
Oh, the fuck you feel that? That's all for this week.
So, my love, the little bit of the closing of that, that was his big closer for the show.
FYI.
Oh, that was that was that, that was that I was the big one
Yep, nice. It was his final thought
Maybe he knows that zero percent of people get to the end of the show
So he could say anything. Yeah, give us best jokes that we get I truly hope that his final his real final thought is is that a bus?
That's company pretty fast. Alright so Cardiff wins
3-1-1-0 alright. Is that the final score? Congratulations Cardiff. Congratulations
Cardiff. Thank you. Vinnie I'll gladly give you the answers next time. Oh thanks pal.
Just shoot him out. Shoot him out of time. We'll totally fucking play this jump. This is bullshit. Sounds good. Who's money on it?
Rodney Amai.
The devil cat. February 3rd and 4th.
In Rochester.
New York. Get your tickets down.
Carl edited that.
Carl, what's your take? Is that what it's supposed to sound like?
I edited that's why you did that.
Yes.
It didn't fool anyone.
Carl, what's your take on Chad Zyman?
Do you think he's going come to Rochester because he goes?
He goes I'm 90% which sounds like a yes, and then he goes, but it's just so cold
You know, I see like an excuse came out right away. What do you think?
Well, I book my hotel. I have two queen beds. So he's he's got a place to stay
Well, that'll be nice for him
You might want to shove your credit cards to your PJs.
Okay.
All right.
What have we done today, guys?
I think we've done it all.
We talked about the Metz.
We talked about Jeff highs and Greg Prince.
Wow.
That guy's a dynamical.
And as he available for speaking, he gave me speak. He just got some hot takes about sports that I really enjoyed
a lot. Our cringe of the week was so cringy. People were like, what the fuck is going
on here? Yeah. That's what the cringe of the week is. Doug Goodstein was I was centering
John talking about the good old days. Chad Zumak is getting goofed up in a way that I can't be I
he's out of my show I can't beat that what Bob and governor doing so
congrats to them. Opie wanted to film the Ghostbusters library but got
kicked out by a twink. So you know that means everyone's favorite part of the show. The team is the team.
The team is the team.
The team is the team.
I already did the spot.
We're going to be doing our worst of 2022 with the whole gang here.
And that will be out before Christmas day.
If you want to watch or listen live, you can watch live.
If you're a Patreon member or a super cast member, I sent out the link.
You can watch it on YouTube.
If you want to listen live, anyone can do that by sending up to our discord.
There's a link from who are these calm.
Anyone can sign up on our discord and listen live 3 30 PM Eastern on Friday.
Is what we'll be doing that.
We were supposed to have an ice tub show Friday night, but because of the storm
that's coming through fucking Rochester, that has been canceled.
I'm supposed to be in a tent.
So when there's a storm coming through,
you're playing in a tent to stop,
and I was like, yeah, let's not do that.
It's probably a bad idea.
I say go for a voice.
See what happens.
So that'll be good.
It will be more relaxed.
We don't have anything to go.
We don't have any obligations after that.
You know what, Stuttering John had a big comedy show booked in Rochester at the same time, but due to the storm,
they had to cancel. That's another clip that I pulled. I can't wait to
tie to Chrissy about this because I also pulled the clip where he turned down the stand-up gig.
Like right before he's supposed to go on stage because they had cameras there. He's like,
oh, I'm not doing this. Not there's cameras here. And he goes, I've been offered $10,000 to do a comedy special.
And I was just remembering back to the time right before the pandemic.
He goes, yeah, I got offered $10,000 to do a Japan show.
And then he got canceled to the COVID.
I'm like, who the fucking Japan would know who's suffering?
Jada's.
How is it even possible to you to like, why does he have these lies?
They're just so over the top
It looks very similar to a logo on a box of detergents
Dr. Sparkle and he looks like the get he looks like the bad guy that done mr. Sparkle thought
It's grime a trot
It's stick lines.
Oh God, I'm black card if I guess is what I'm trying to say. Thank you.
It's a black card.
Vinny, thanks so much for stopping by.
But anything you want to promote?
Oh, obviously check out the creep off.
If you wouldn't mind every Monday,
at one o'clock on YouTube live,
Carl and I have a good old time.
And if someone wants to tweet at me at Vinny Poe,
you know, let me know if Tim Wakefield made it
to the olive faith.
I'm still, I'm still wondering.
That's about it.
Fucking the knuckleball is not impressive.
You figured out a trick.
Gives a shit.
She's a guy with a fan.
I'm just wondering if that guy,
I mean, he won a world series, I think.
Yeah, lots of guys have to be there
to win a world series.
Just curious.
You should see a doll.
Carter for what?
No, he's Canadian. They have baseball
and Canada. The blue chase of one of the blue.
I don't see Minnesota.
Yeah. Who's playing sure stuff for the twins right now?
I don't watch baseball. But Chris Bassett was just
traded from the New York Mets.
Very good. All right,
Cardiff, what do you want from out? Patreon.com slash Cardiff Electric and Cardiff Electric YouTube.
Also tomorrow on the DIC show, guess who will be on?
Cardiff's not the DIC show tomorrow?
No, Lorenzo Aereola.
Make sure you watch.
Oh great.
Cool.
Very cool.
I'm his manager now.
Are you really?
Yes.
I'm doing a DIC show crossover tomorrow with Dick Mashed in a 3 p.m. Eastern time and
I was planning on pulling some that's all funny
Because I can't get enough of the rants of a reality. You know, he's great. I may have just ruined dick surprise for you
World's collod fair enough
All right, well, please do as you get next time It might be the episode we find out once and for all.
Who are these podcasts?
Sleep well, everypony.
Starting in the most bits of morning radio.
Get down to show these old right now.
Hmm, okay.
Great show.
Good job, everybody.
Great job, everyone.
We left our ass as well.
Um, how?
Don't let people who don't even get the job.
Don't join me.
Don't join me.
Crazy.
Mental illness can literally draw you crazy.
It's gross.
It's a gas thing I've ever heard of my entire life.
It looks like a cow.
What? You have courage, man. I
You know who are these podcasts I don't know I don't get it. Makes no sense. All right, Carter, do you have any reviews that you want to play for us?
There's no news? No, we only do news on the weekend show.
Oh, I never noticed. Yeah. Okay, our first review. Yeah.
No good. Was a fan when the Stuttering John stuff came out. Carl jokes are lame.
And he does a loud stupid laugh after each one. I like this guy. He's desperately looking for a new
Stuttering John when his butt buddy, M he merged is a stuttering John that never made
it. I guess that's it for this show, even if John comes back, this show has already burned
itself out repeating a lot of corny jokes. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Listen, shut up for a second.
All right. I'm going to say that that's a one-star review, Carter. Yes, I can tell you the smile on your face. I'm smiling too.
I'm gonna tell everyone smiles
Make sure you and final review. It's from across the pond in Great Britain. Great.
Titled losers
the losers. The host who calls himself Carl when his real name is Kevin is a buck tooth nerd with club V. It's a pretty good joke. It's so bad. The show is extremely boring and occasionally verges on harassment.
When they do long segments about stuttering John's children,
not even the mob went after families. One star from me.
Is that a five star review? That's a five star.
You said one star.
Yeah, but I was a five star. I wasn't a card of.
But it said one star.
Yes, but just read the number of stars card if five.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yes.
All right.
Once again, doing a fantastic job.
Oh, one of the review girls we ever had.
I can't remember now.
I think it's always been card if right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And there's that due to the other vegetables.
The other vegetables.
All right. Let's listen to some voicemail starting with blind Mike. and there's that dude of it the other vegetables. The other vegetables.
All right, let's listen to some voicemail starting with
Blind Mike calling into the show.
My co-host from who are these socials?
Please clap.
Hey, Carl, it's your co-host Blind Mike.
Oh, and how I talk.
I just, I gotta tell you,
but here are a lot of rumors about Jinda.
I gotta say, I may not be able rumors about you and I gotta say I may not
be able to see but I definitely can hear you're a contour. I gotta go. I say stay black
but everybody is with me. Okay. There you go.
Major Collinette. So, Gaeliger, I played a clip when I was on the Druid Mike show. If
you subscribe to our Patreon, I put out many episodes where I was on the Drew and Mike show. If you subscribe to our
Patreon, I put out many episodes where's my segment on the Drew and Mike show and I played
Galger when he was on WTF with Mark Marin.
That's a crazy fucking interview.
That's one of the funniest things.
Yeah, I knew the man.
You met Galger.
I knew Galger.
How well you know?
I spent two weeks babysitting him.
Okay.
For the joke factory. Yeah. Because they booked him to comeitting him. Okay. For the joke factory.
Yeah.
Because they booked him to come into town.
Yeah.
But part of his deal was he got to stay at hotel for two weeks after his show.
So my job was to go get him weed, take him wherever he needed to go, and just basically be a pal to Gallagher when he needed one.
So you've always had great jobs.
Wow.
It was you buddy. The worst.
Really?
Oh, that sounds amazing.
I told you this story.
I know.
That's how you the craziest thing you ever said to me.
What's that?
He was sitting in the back seat of my car,
sitting in the middle hump,
so he could talk into my ear.
And I was just looking at the roof,
and he goes, you know,
I owned the rats to the teenage mutant ninja turtles.
He's talked about that.
But the Yakuzah stole them from me turtles. He's talked about that. Yeah, but the Yakus stole them from me.
I heard him talking about that.
Another show before.
And he just said, I was like, this is the craziest day
of my whole life.
He's right over my head with that dumb voice.
He says that he met the people who created the T's
mutant ninja jossum in and layered.
But it was just like a cartoon.
It was just a still.
They didn't have any idea about personality, what they should do or anything, you know, like he came up
with all of that.
Like, quarter of the Gallagher.
And I said that Raphael's got to have a little bit of a chip on his shoulder.
He didn't brag about how he thought they'd like pizza.
I bet you're like high five again.
But they're like, yeah, triple pizza.
Let's go.
We're getting way off topic.
Sorry.
When Gallic has said most comedians suck and need to listen to him, he was right. And for what is worth, you're the Gallic of podcasting.
Most comedians suck and most podcast is suck.
And he's nothing without his props and you are nothing without your clips.
So don't fuck yourself call me back kind of sound like a compliment a first-aid man. Yeah, I'm in a third and
Kind of a dig there to be fairies, right. You're not even something with your clips on the creep off
Oof, I just thought he meant the show would be more entertaining if you smashed watermelons. I could do that
Something bad idea
All right, I'll plug your ears
out of this while. So I get why people are sick of the song parodies, but why is no one
complaining about the internet news segment? That's always been the worst part of the show.
It's worse than the review segment. It's just five minutes of Reddit comments.
Hmm, fucking Reddit comments. I'd rather listen to five minutes of Opie read his chat.
Going to Reddit's comedy is like going to the anime convention to get laid.
Come on bro. off for that shit.
All right. Well, thank you for your input. We always appreciate people's input on the show.
Our Disagreeional
Stay voice now. All right. Well, people other people are disagreeing too,
like Kiki Loko, who I think gets their messages right.
Is anyone to get some messages right? I was like, no,
get that signal out. That's pretty funny. That's pretty good.
That's pretty funny. That's pretty good.
Called sitting here at Saturday night. I just ate a bunch of spicy Indian food and I just did a
I'm high as fuck. I just did a bunch of bonks, bonks,
and I got an idea.
Cool for you guys to do.
To the tune of rock lobster
Zumaqa robber I can hear it now
Jenny jingles
Next
I was your music director now you should get on it
I thought it was your music director now. You should get on it.
Love you, show, man.
See ya.
Thank you for that suggestion.
The syllables don't work out of that one.
Nope.
Doesn't work out.
Although someone messaged me they didn't know how to make a song parody,
but they had a great idea.
They wanted to use Michael Jackson's bad.
And immediately I'm like, hold me shit.
Why is it so without that?
You have two days. Yeah, we're gonna have them
Yeah, I mix a lot of sides. It makes a lot of sense. You can deal out with that. All right moving on
Hey, Carl
You might not know this but a
episode tucked up
Call me back
All right, so we didn't get our episode up like we normally do for this past one and people were calling me then a new
Stuttering John to talk about what I did here. I am it had nothing to do with me our hosting company was fucked up on
Someday and so we couldn't upload the show
Why could upload the show was you couldn't play it anywhere?
Which is really frustrating because I tried troubleshooting for hours
And it wasn't on me and their support wasn't working
Why are you looking at me like I'm making this shit up Betty? I don't like that look you're giving me right now
I'm not making any faces at you. Okay
It's very frustrating. That was very frustrated by what happened. He's hung over from the fucking football game
Then I before and you didn't get to it till Monday. I'm not you thrilled. What was going on?
Hit Carl your idiotic take on the geno Pat punch
It finally all makes sense. Okay, you made that idiotic statement on 1210
You release that idiotic take to the world on the 11th.
On the 11th car.
So if you take 12 plus 10 is 22 divided by 2 is 11.
That's why you may be an outtake now.
Let's go on to 2022.
20 divided and have this 10.
10 is the day you made that idiotic statement.
22 divided by 2 is 11.
11 is the day you made that idiotic statement. 22 divided by two is 11. 11 is the day you made
that idiotic statement. It all is coming together. Do you care to retract and come back to
the side of law and order? Wow. Mine blown. I had no idea. If you could see my hand, you'd see an 11 right now.
Is it like this? Yes.
Like that time of the 11.
Thank you.
Thank you.
He's not going your number one.
Oh, okay.
Thank you.
All right.
I'm sure we'll talk about this again.
The next show, Trucker Andy and I are in a bank of buzzmires, B-U-Z-Z-M-I-R-E-S.
You can find that wherever you stream music.
This is a gentleman who is checking out our latest EP.
Hi, Carl.
You're a big bucktooth, hairy leg, clump foot, motherfucker.
I just want to say, it's been a while, but I might have been one of the only people who
have enjoyed the music special
Thank you, and I also want to say that the BuzzMiles new EP is bloody gorgeous
Thank you. It is fantastic and
You should go and go listen to it. I just want to point out I'm watching Cardiff get further further with the camera
I know he's looking for his guitar right now. I know it's fancy what he's up to
He's almost on a screen
Yeah, I do it. I do know it's coming. No, let's let this finish out first
You should go and go listen to it
The keyboard sounds like spot away. You should have recorded on piano
Um, because it sounds like a midi file so it is gross. But the buzz might have broke. I tried to get the album back.
I tried to get the album.
Carl said he uploaded it, but it just wouldn't play.
Oh, sorry.
Oh, how dare you.
What do you think about the new buzz Myers card?
Have you checked that out yet?
No.
Do you want any of the riffs from that yet?
Do you want to play for us?
No.
I'm trying to give you a chance to do something here.
No, I don't want to play that shit.
Hey, good song card.
Thank you.
What do you got for us?
Well, that's all for voicemails.
No, I got a few more.
Okay.
Did Gary call?
No. I haven't heard Gary over a while. Well, I got a voicemail from. The Gary call? No.
I haven't heard from Gary in a while.
Well, I got a voicemail from Gary today.
Did you really?
Yes, you were playing.
Why haven't checked yet today?
I get the voicemails the night before I was full.
So, off to the look.
You know, with those dogs,
do you live with Hannah?
Hold on a second.
I'm going to pull this whole thing wide open.
I think this is Hannah's boyfriend.
Cardiff, what you want to say?
He's trying to distract us now.
Trying to change the subject in a good job.
I don't know about you guys with tasty jams like that. I believe him.
Thank you. Next goal.
Hey, next goal. Oh, this is from one of my favorite colors, slowpoke Paco.
E-curve, it's slowpoke Paco.
I just wanted to say, Mary Christmas and Happy New Year.
Happy good one
And my love to icy
All right, thank you slow book back. Oh there was another call didn't sound great. So I want to play it
But Baldo guy says the truckers use jerking off to stay alert all the time because we were talking about how stupid it was
The certain John was saying he's jerk off your fall asleep with a wheel. That's why I told you I hate doing this show next to Andy
The certain John was saying he's jerk off your fall asleep with a wheel. That's why I told you I hate doing this show next to Andy
He's already jerked up on that point
Ready well doing the fault by the time we get to the voicemail segments. He's cranking it hard
I just I wanted to point out to the guy if you're trying to get later the trucker that's that hoping telling us you're jerking off while driving
Is that a pleasant sight or thought that we have? I'm
no longer going to do this when I try to drive that. That's that's it. Thanks. I'm huge.
Carol, this numerology shift got me all fucked up. Listen to that and I'm starting to think about the number 11 and r.o. And it is I'm involved in this harder than I ever thought.
And I have a wife who I'm row, row, man,
tickly involved in.
And it gets worse because this morning I took a shit and what did I wipe my ass
with a roll, roll, roll of toilet paper? Who is shit?. You know I'm saying fam. Shit fucked up.
We gotta bring that hashtag GG33. We gotta bring more content from him on the show. That's
fucking fascinating stuff. Do you believe in that stuff? Cardinal that numerology stuff?
Absolutely. I think everything's in the numbers. It's
all of the numbers. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
All right, this is the last one that I
have. Holy shit. Just wanted to
come on with an idea for the who
said it that probably is a lot of
content to mine too, but I think that
card of shardadding some Tommy from
MSC. It's media as well as the choices.
Mm-hmm. Be pretty good. Bye. Dude, that guy says some fucking crazy shit.
You all remember Jackie the Joker.
Jackie the Jokester.
Jackie the Jokester.
Okay, are we are we putting Tommy in?
I well, I can't and we got to take someone out of her putting Tommy in.
Everyone knows the rings of Saturn are not that nights this time of year
Who said it?
Now you know who said it
You tell me do you want one for Friday with Tommy?
Sure, yeah, okay, who are we taking out?
Zuma I knew you're gonna say Zuma. That's fine. We could take out Zuma.
Zuma glass of e-friends.
Yes.
Tommy in.
Zuma.
OK.
All right.
That sounds fun.
See, the only problem with this is that the Tommy
quotes are the best or when he gets phrases wrong and like
sayings like completely incorrect.
So those are the ones I want to hear on the show
but it also give it away to some degree.
Well, we could do to catch an alien.
That's not a big idea.
What does Tommy say next?
It's really cats and, boy, cats and more cats.
Race and race.
This is why we workshop. This is why we workshop this is why we workshop you're right. We should be doing this though during our weekly meetings
Not on the show, right? Yes, well usually our weekly meetings you just jerked off in front of me
You you could see that
Stop my camera was facing the
Side of a bitch stop me to sexy potato them
Sorry No, son of a bitch stop me to sexy potato them Sorry
Good answer to blaming motherfucker
Okay
Guess what?
Around the ship I stay great goodbye
Go fuck yourselves
Have a good week