Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep387 - Giggly Squad
Episode Date: February 23, 2023I hope all you ladies are ready to giggle because we're saddling up next to the Giggly Squad. Apparently these women, much like Stuttering John, think that as long as the hosts are laughing the show m...ust be funny. At least one of them is very hot, so there's that. Kaya Orsan joins the show to learn all about his Saturn return. After we check out an amazing new Chad Zumock song, we do a deep dive on the Ralphamale himself, Ethan Ralph. And finally Cardiff joins us to help us catch an alien. https://twitter.com/kayaorsan We’re live in Philly on April 22nd with the Dick Show. Tickets here: live.dick.show Support us, get bonus episodes, Vic and Hannah pics, and watch live every Saturday and most Wednesdays: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
No one
On the face of this should go along with any of this garbage. I'm going to number two
Gay per horsecock
Episode 87 are you a boner guy? You know what I miss penis. What a dick. What are you talking about?
I'm the one who should apologize cuz
Cuz a room cuz a room slap a runie It's showtime the one who should apologize. Cous! Couseru! Couseru!
Slapperoonie.
It's showtime.
[♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE [♪
W-A-T-P!
W-A-T-P! Hello, Robert Nixon, Couseroo.
Welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts.
The only show where people from other countries speak better English than the host.
I am that host, I'm a guy called Carl.
With me today, a man whose back is sore from carrying the official podcast, it's internet
personality and far right activist, Kaya Orson.
What's happening activist Kaya Orson, what's happening Kaya?
Is that my reputation now?
Because I've seen some comments on the WATV subreddit
calling me a Liptard Cuck.
So I'm confused what you are right now.
I can't keep up.
Yeah, not too like.
Oftentimes it's also difficult for me to keep up.
Am I an Nazi?
Am I a Liptard?
What are we going with?
I think the official podcast, Wessetters,
consider you the far right element of the show.
That's true, that's true.
So that's probably where I'm going to get that for.
Adolf Hitler by defending JK Rowling this past week.
How dare you?
Some people are very angry at me.
How dare you?
Please go to whoarethese.com,
get our email address, voice mail number,
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Every single month and you can watch the show
live, what it airs,
people are watching us right now on YouTube
and you can be one of those cool people
when you subscribe to Patreon or Supercast
with who are these podcasts.
And also I just did a bonus show.
We just dropped it today.
Actually last night, I think, I did a bonus show.
Alex Jones, we checked in on him.
See how he's doing.
He owes $1.5 billion to some folks in Connecticut.
So I wanted to check in.
I think they wanted $2 trillion.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think they wanted the infinity dollars is what they asked for.
And the judges like, that's too much. That sounds outrageous. We'll we'll make it 1.5 bill
See if we can figure that one out
So I wanted to check it to see how he's doing so he's and I
Checked that out. We're doing a bonus show coming up
Next week early on in the week before February is over. That's right. Easy for you to say part 12.
Part 12.
And we'll also be doing a Dick Show crossover, I believe, next week as well, which is fitting
because tickets are on sale for the Who Are These Podcast, the Dick Show crossover live
event.
April 22nd at World Cafe Live in Philadelphia live.dick.show for tickets. I just did a bonus
episode of the creep off with Tony from hack the movies. That's on the creep-offs patreon and
Tony's gonna be there. He's from Philly. So he'll be hanging out with us and
He'll have some type of role on the show. I'm sure we'll find some of it for him to do. It would be good. Also, we encourage our listeners to give us a five-star review
and apple podcast and then show us in the comments section today. We'll be reviewing a show
called Giggly Squad. This is a suggestion from Chetanstein in our discord server, we
have both listened separately. We have not discussed it with each other beforehand.
Let's get into it.
Let's say show hosted by Hannah Berner
and Paige Disorbo.
I didn't know anything about this.
I'll just say this right up front
because this is what I learned
as I was doing my research.
These two met on a reality show called Summer House,
which I think is on Bravo or something. I don't know. I don't watch reality TV, to Met on a reality show called Summer House,
which I think is on Bravo or something. I don't know.
I don't watch reality TV, but apparently these are both
on the TV stuff.
I'm a TV TV man.
Yes, exactly.
If you're 600 plus pounds, I'm watching.
Otherwise, get off my TV.
I got no dice.
Yeah, otherwise, fuck off.
Yeah, otherwise, why are we talking about you?
Cause of shit.
So let's get right into this.
I pulled some video clips from a recent episode
they did with a astrologer.
Is that the right word for someone who thinks
that they know what the fuck they're talking about?
I only brought out your clips.
I keep forgetting that you guys do video now.
But yeah, also on their YouTube channel,
they didn't have many episodes though.
So I decided to go on Spotify and check their older episodes.
Yeah.
I'll let you go ahead and then I can talk
about the episode I listen to.
Okay, go, I'm going to listen to different episodes
because I find it so annoying and enraging
when they have these types of gas on,
and they take them seriously.
It's weird.
There's a lot of talk about the Saturn return.
Are you familiar with the Saturn return, Kaya?
Is that something that you've heard?
I'm not speaking of planets.
The texts.
You know how they say men are from Mars
and women are from Venus.
After listening to this show,
I don't think that's true anymore.
I don't think we're in the same galaxy.
I know. I cannot see how, but we can find something like this funny.
I cannot relate whatsoever.
It was very interesting to listen to this and get a perspective of, oh, this is what
girls laugh at, I guess.
Oh, they giggle nonstop on this show.
And actually, you know what, I'm just going to fast forward to a different clip since you brought that up. I call this clip utter nonsense. This is what this show
is right here.
That was what engine is told is she was judging. You need to clean up a blank baby. There's some worms in your crop.
It's a glasses. Yeah, she's a different person. She can't see her. We can.
It's funny. I don't think it's funny. I don't know what they're giggling about. Here's another example of just girls giggling a lot.
It gives us a lot of insight on how somebody functions and moves through the world, you
know, like the strengths.
Chaoticly.
I have fully, but I get my chart read at least once a year, maybe like the one.
What's it?
And.
Where is.
Yeah, it's okay.
Here's my example of what women apparently find funny sometimes that they even themselves
admit that they cannot explain why it is funny.
So I call this clip first world's problems because this is apparently what chicks give
each other grief about on the internet.
I remember playing my clip too first.
This is women on Instagram contacting one of the hosts,
saying, hey, your co-host is like losing herself.
She's becoming too much like her boyfriend
because she started using a different font
on her Instagram stories.
I get all your DMs.
I knew her DMs you, you don't respond, they DM me,
and you know how I am with Admin,
but I do my best.
Someone was like, please, please ask pages on the pod.
She goes, I'm afraid she's changing.
Like, you know how you change to look like
you're so different from another sometimes.
She said she's afraid that you're changing your fonts
on Instagram stories to be like Craig's font.
Oh no.
And I was like, that the rumor out there?
Yeah, like people are worried, talking about it.
People think your brainwash is everything okay.
This is the most chick brains, like first world hang up
I've ever heard of.
This is not something I can relate to on any level
to like be going through some podcast host
that I like, you know, his Instagram stories and thinking,
wait, did he just change his font?
I saw his girlfriend use that font
Kaya getting pussy whipped this show is
Otter nothingness I was into a couple different episodes
I was driving around today and I'm mostly to it and there's just nothing happening
This is the definition I kept zoning out. Yeah, I kept zoning out
But I played their clip because
They follow this up by some joke that they make and they both laugh at it
And I assume women who listen to the show laugh at it and they themselves even admits that they don't really understand why it's funny and they can't explain it
That's clump three in which they compare men to toothpaste
It's like Creola crayons. Yeah, which is what I think about when I think of him
Yes, when he does it's adorable when you do it. It's like ironic.
You know how there's like TikToks when people are like,
the name, Mike, and this Crest toothpaste is the same thing.
And you can't explain it.
Craig is a crayon.
Craig is a crayon.
Stupid fucking braddle nut.
What is they talking about?
I don't know.
I can, again, I don't get it, which is fine.
I guess I don't get it. The show isn't for me.
I'll say that.
It is not for me. I appreciate that. That's fine.
I think it's okay. But this show was very difficult for me to pull clips from
because I kept zoning out.
And the first 30 seconds I zoned out because there was an ad and she started talking about like boom boom
California
brushes or cream or something. That's my clip one and by the way, notice how she kind of has a little hiccup while
Sing the name of the product to she forgets it for a moment. Uh-uh. The most important parts of my full girl shower
Is the Brazilian boom boom cream. That's from
sold day, genera and anything that this brand makes, I am down to buy. The
boom boom cream can be applied in the morning after shower or before a night
out for a dewy glow on the skin. It also smells so amazing. It smells like, you
know, when you take those showers, when've been on vacation and it's like that shower
after the sun, but before dinner,
and vacation just has that smell.
This is exactly what the Brazilian boom, boom cream smells like.
It's a completely alien.
I think if we got invaded today,
I'd have more in common with an alien than these women
and what they're talking about.
I like the principal attorney says, I wish they were on Venus.
I love women.
It's almost endearing just how like this culture I do.
I don't listen to many podcasts, but this is it's almost adorable.
It's endearing.
I'll let you play some clips.
All right.
So this was the part that blew me away. I started
watching the show. I'd never heard of it before. I don't know
these women are that's totally not on my radar in any single
way. And they start off this episode talking about the
live shows that they're doing the tour that they're doing.
But no, we we have so many dates that we announced. Yep. And
second shows to pretty much every single city.
I just exciting.
So fucking exciting.
I mean, the giga-glairs are pharaoh creatures.
They rapidly got their seats.
We did add new shows.
I'm just gonna look at it for a second.
Also, the aggression in which I got DMs from giga-glairs
being like, are you gonna add a fucking second show
or like, what's the deal?
Or the people were like, come to Boston.
I'm like, we've been there seven times.
Come down Red Sox fans.
But no, we love them.
We have seats left in Durham, Houston, Dallas, Phoenix,
Huntington, and Minneapolis.
And we're working on possibly adding three shows.
So like Chicago and San Diego.
Chicago deserves that because we've really neglected them
in the tour.
So Kaya, I thought, are they just pretending to have a tour?
Because it's fun and funny. What's going on here?
And then I went to their website and I realized that this Hannah
burner, the woman on the right, if you're watching, is an actual
comic. She does stand up and she tours all over and she sells out.
She's way more popular than Chad Zumak
from what I could tell from her website.
I mean, who isn't?
Oh, good boy.
See, this is what I always think.
We always review these shows that are like,
you go, who the fuck listen to this?
Who's this for?
And then you realize, oh, they're selling out stadiums.
What the fuck?
They were actually making bank.
They're touring the nation. What the hell? They were actually making bank touring the nation.
What the hell?
Just like when, was it you and me,
or maybe me and Doug, we were reviewing some true crime
podcasts and they were like pulling clips of their life
audience losing their shit, cheering.
It was like a soccer event, but for women.
Yeah, again, good for them, but it's just very mind blowing
to me.
By the way, the first thing when you see when you go to their
website isn't even their episodes or anything. They don't even have a page for their episodes. It's just very mind blowing to me. By the way, the first thing when you see when you go to their website
isn't even their episodes or anything.
They don't even have a page for their episodes.
They just chill merch and they're show tickets.
All right, right.
So that's true.
And I will say that, so I mentioned that Hannah,
the ugly one is a comic and page who's sitting over here.
She's like a fashion designer.
So they have tons of clothing lines and clothes
and products and merchandise.
But that's what she's in a brown, onesie.
By the way, the way that she's dressed in this episode,
I didn't realize that she's hot.
Because she looks terrible.
Oh, you don't like burlab sex.
And it's like, yeah, she doesn't look good.
They need to swap outfits.
Get right.
The truth is, we should be wearing the potato sec, right?
I would agree with that.
Yes.
So, but they were talking about how they're doing
these live shows and they're adding second shows.
So they have an early show and a late show
and all these cities are going to,
and I'm like, what is the show?
What do you guys do?
You just sit and talk to each other?
They talk about the next show.
Yeah, right.
Like, well, I don't even understand
what the foreman of the show is unless they have
an astrologer out there to read in their charts
or something, I don't know what's going on.
So this is where Hannah puts on her sunglasses
in the middle of this episode of the thrones everybody off.
No one knows what the fuck to do.
Like, because a lot of my personality,
I can see some of it in my parents,
but some of it, I'm like, where do I come from?
Yeah, and I think that like as it relates to parents too, you know, like we're always telling a story, you know?
Oh wow, what happened to you?
You don't have to go anywhere.
I just like looking like I'm really busy and I might need to run to a meeting at any point.
I've changed since I last looked at you.
I've also looked like Shania Twain when I've said she looked like Cheoniah Twain
when she first walked in and she's gone straight to her head.
Ha ha ha ha.
Now, I don't know about you, Kaye,
but when I throw on sunglasses inside,
I don't think that I'm trying to explain
I'm going to a business meeting.
That's not what that looks like.
No, that's a bit...
That's not what anybody thinks.
Nobody thinks, oh, this must be a very busy and successful person.
What people think is, oh, this person is shy.
They're like too shy and autistic to put eye contact.
Then they're trying to conceal their eyes.
That's what I was thinking.
Yes.
That would make a way for us.
It's the same reason why like balding men
wear beanies all the time even in summer inside.
It's like, we all know why you're doing it.
All right, we don't have to talk about
Tim Poole the whole time, do we?
I'm talking about other. It's all right. We don't have to talk about Tim pool the whole time. Do we?
All right. I have a news update for everybody. I think not a lot of people know about this.
So like for instance, Pete Davidson is going through his Saturn return right now, which I think is very, very interesting. It just feels like it's the gift that keeps on giving.
Pete Davidson's going through a set of returns. I didn't even see that the New York Post. No one's talking about this.
What did to find this out?
I don't know, but it's butthole eyes.
I have to find this out from these women.
He's on giving is he a Scorpio?
He is.
Did you know?
Did you?
Did you?
Did you?
I didn't know that, but I like can feel it when I see him.
Oh my God.
We're gonna fuck Pete Davis.
But I mean, wait, they're. You're gonna fuck Pete David.
But I mean, wait, they're calling him a you-ha'll boyfriend.
My dad.
My dad actually said that the other day.
He's like, I think it's so weird.
Like Pete Davidson hasn't seen you in message Joe.
And I was like, dad, like, stop.
That's a weird conversation to have from your dad.
Hey, Paige Honey, come here.
How come you weren't fucking Pete Davidson? Is to ride with you or something? All the other girls
are fucking Pete Davidson. I thought you're one of the hot lovers about Pete Davidson pulling
all of these hot checks. I feel like it's a side up by the three-letter agent. It's
like demoralized the rest of us. But maybe not. Maybe they really see something in him.
Maybe as a giant cock. I really don't know.
He does have big, what is a Saturn return?
So you hinted at it before.
Oh, well, let's talk about the Saturn return
because we're gonna learn more about this clip.
The more established your life is,
the harder your Saturn return is gonna hit you.
Wow, which is ironic, because you think,
like I have it all figured out,
because I'm a Forbes 30 under 30 bitch, you know, but you're actually
Dude, why I don't know why Hannah is so blown away by this news like her head's back
She's like whoa whoa whoa everybody knows that about the Sanitary
Look at the one on the left to she her mouth is a gate
She's my
Information leave this is a combination.
She's still thinking about Pete Davidson, but.
So, I mean, I've been saying this for years
that, you know, the more established you are in life,
the harder your standard of return is gonna hit you.
It's all I talk about.
So, is this the white woman version of like,
Kamappens or karma?
I guess.
The taller you are, the harder you fall or something?
Well, basically, this is what.
Sweden recording.
This is what I, you're talking to, you're trying to talk,
since that's your cat.
Sorry.
This is how I understand it, Kaya.
So, wherever Saturn is in relation to Earth when you're born,
that's gonna happen again in like 28 to 30 years.
That's your Saturn return.
And your Saturn return is a time when your life
completely changes because for some reason
your life knows where Saturn is,
even though you don't.
Yeah, that's basically what I had to like Google this show.
Like what are they fucking talking about?
And they sit on the same page.
To me, especially like liberal and progressive women like this who would always love to dunk on religion and
patriarchy or cold traditions they they then come around and
claim that like pockets of gas and rock in the space and empty space somehow affects their lives
Well, they're also the same women because I heard this word used a couple times who can play about the patriarchy
Like why are men running all this shit?
This is why.
Because you're worried about your standard return.
This is your fucking yourself on this one.
Here's, um, here's some more on, uh,
then Saturn talk that's important.
But now Saturn has officially gone off of your ascendant and into your first
house, which is where you really sort of like become a person
and you manifest those energies in your life.
So it's less about like keeping secrets
and it's more about telling the truth.
So now this is you're in a truth era right now.
You're a truth era.
Oh my God.
Drop some teas.
Is it a prerequisite to be a woman to just believe all this and a horse shit like wouldn't one of these two ladies be like that sounds dumb
I don't know I still don't even know if they're honest or if this is just their version of fantasy football
Like I was playing along or do they really believe it? I hope I just fancy football
Yeah, is it because no one wants to be the first one to call them out like the emperors new clothes or whatever?
Yeah, that might be it guys. This is horseshit. This is really dumb. This conversation. We're having a stupid. I'm fired
Like I said if it was if they were honest and they just said well, it's just fun
Well, I'm rooting for planets just like you're rooting for a fantasy football team shirt. Okay, I get that that's fine
But planets just like you're rooting for a fantasy football team shirt. Okay, I get that. That's fine, but that's something I believe.
Shit, I picked Pluto. Give me your buddy.
You lose. It's not even a planet anymore. Damn it.
All right, Kaya. What else did you learn in your episode?
So on the episode that I talked that I watched, they were talking about open relationships,
particularly, I think they recorded it around
when Will Smith, the slapcock, decided to get up on the stage
during the Golden Globes or something in Slap Chris Rock,
because it made a joke it is why it's expense.
And they talk about how they cannot really relate
to open relationships because where do you even find the time to cheat?
And it's kind of impressive that some women can cheat that's cooked for.
It's crazy, but it makes me feel like open marriages are like hard.
No, I feel like they're probably so hard.
Just scheduling in general has to be a goddamn nightmare.
Just like having two guys.
Like, it's exhausting.
No, how do you have them mental capacity?
No, that's why like when people cheat,
I'm like, good for you for like figuring out.
I'm like, what time do you wake up in the morning?
I know.
It's not about what time you wake up,
it's about what time you go to bed.
When I find out about women cheating,
I'm like, a good fit, yeah.
Yeah, but you go, girl.
That's great. Kiminoa. Yes, but you go girl. That's great.
Yeah, queen everything.
Every fucking to pray behavior.
I don't care.
It should be cheating. It's not a good thing.
Right. Can you just tell your friend that she's an asshole
like you should instead of like fucking high-fiving her?
Right.
About it.
Shame. Shame is an important thing.
I know this all started with sluck shaming,
which I never understood. Like it's actually good to not be a slot
on a whore.
It should be shamed.
Shame is a useful tool handed to us by evolution,
to course correct and fix behavior
that is detrimental to us.
They continue and I have a clip of them.
I don't know if it's because I'm married now.
I'm kind of just trying to settle down and grow up a bit.
But it really irks me when I hear basic bitch redditor takes like,
oh, everyone at Walmart to Zugley
and they should be banned from voting
and people who have children are evil that's Clop 5.
I saw two kids in the airport and I was like,
absolutely not.
I saw a family of four in the airport
and I was like, keep it in your pants, sir.
Like I was like, this is too much.
I'm gonna say it again,
this is a controversial podcast, three is too was like this is too much I'm gonna say it again this is
a controversial podcast three is too much three is too much three is like
selfish at this point it's like how like DNA do you need a fucking spread in
this one stop showing off have to cut it have to two and two and done okay three is too much I don't know you could
argue about it but clearly zero is too little for you. You have too much free time.
You're like talking about fucking planets.
You need something. You need a baby's ass to wipe. You need a baby to feed on like teach math.
You need something to do in your life. Lady, you need family.
I didn't follow the purpose, but, but Paige, she's talking to that, uh, Aliza woman.
And she even says she goes, I just feel like I was born
to be a mother. I'm like, well, yeah, that's kind of how violent she works. That's kind of the point.
Ignore shit. By the way, I have to say because like I said, I was thrown off by page and I was
first watching this and then I did some research and I realized that if she had Tourette, I was thrown off by page and I was first watching this and then I did some research
and I realized that if she had Tourette,
I would be in love with her.
She is a spokesperson, I have to tell you that.
And it's funny because these ladies are just like producer Chris
and me, one of them is hot, the other one is funny.
And look, Chris is very funny.
I don't think anyone's arguing with me on that.
Folks, folks, folks Spokes, Spokes, Spokes.
All right, guys, what else you got over here?
Well, they continue and they continue talking about children.
And yes, I think Paige is at the...
God, no way.
This cat is unbelievable.
This cat was sorry.
I'm going to the podcast so badly.
She usually just fucking bites me and then when I go live, she wants nothing but to cuddle.
Is that a car?
No.
Now I'm a bit sad.
They continue to talk about motherhood and being a mother and I think the fat one decides
to talk about how she would have a problem naming her boys if she had
boys because well, I'll let her explain. That's clip six.
I can't choose a boy name. And now I know why.
Cause every guy I've ever fucked, I cannot name my kid that name.
So I have no name.
Ever. But like, think about how many names you can't name because you talked to
a guy for a week and he was kind of a dick and you're like Oh, reminds me of Eric. Oh, I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate Eric. He was such a creep. He was such a creepy guy. Also, I sucked his dick
He will write. I'm a horn and I fucked all these guys that are now hates
Maybe it's time for some self-reflection, you know, maybe slouching yourself a little have some impulse control
It's not normal to end up with a laundry list
of men's names that you hate.
I can name maybe like one or two names
in my entire life of women that I don't like.
That's a good point.
The fact that she goes,
there are no names left of guys I haven't fucked.
I can name my kids,
and they're going like, yeah, I know.
You're right, what?
I feel like it's just a self-pub.ering. Why are you talking to men that you slept with?
Apparently she's made some bad choices in life.
It seems like.
Yeah.
They talk a lot about mental health.
That's one of their big things.
I think there's a whole generation of people who think that no one knew about mental health
until they came around and started talking about a lot.
And I guess they did a whole episode of SSRIs
and this woman was like,
yeah, I know I said I was going on Zolov,
but I'm actually on Prozac, so oops, I fucked that up.
They're just like, they're very into anti-depressants
and having a very stressful life,
these two rich celebrities are having a very stressful life these these two
Rich celebrities are having a hard time
You're talking about being childless being depressed. You're talking about being miserable so much
So that you're spending your time again playing like Pokemon with planets basically like a little child
Talking about how miserable men make you how many men you fuckfully and unhappy maybe you know the shit Lord patriarchs that you hate so much
Maybe they could help you maybe there's some lessons that you can learn from them
Doesn't mean you have to buy into the whole thing and be like a handmade in housewife, but I
Just o' Dean on Xanix isn't working clearly or get a hobby get a hobby
Find something fun to do. This is where hand is gonna list all of her hobbies to the answer. Like, what do you like to do?
What's fun?
This isn't the hobby.
Oh my gosh.
I like to drink coffee now.
I like to eat hobbies, hobbies, hobbies.
Fascinated.
I love petting my cat.
All right, well, those aren't hobbies.
Drinking coffee, eating and petting your cat are not hobbies.
It's shit you do before you get out of bed.
Right, this is not, this is the problem right here Hannah. drinking coffee, eating it better your cat or not obvious. It's shit you do before you get out of bed. Right.
This is not, this is the problem right here, Hannah.
You don't need a soul.
This is a morning routine.
You don't need a soul after you get droned.
You need a bicycle.
Does it?
I don't know.
How unfulfilled do you actually want to live your life?
Well, they're doing very well.
That's what's annoying about this, Kaya.
If I was listening to regular girls
who have had a tough go at it
and things aren't going well and they're complaining,
okay, that's one thing.
These women are highly successful.
They're killing it.
They're touring all over, selling out all these shows.
This podcast is utter bullshit.
Yet they have a ton of listeners, this huge audience,
and they're still complaining about life.
Like at what point do you stop complaining about life?
What does that have to happen?
I would support this if they sound happy.
Sure, it's your choice, your life,
live it the way you want to.
If this is how you want to live fine,
but if you're openly speaking about how miserable
you are, that's fucking time.
Maybe you shouldn't live the way you do,
and maybe you shouldn't fucking promote it
to other people either. Which I will tie into my clip seven, actually, in
which I think Hannah talks about how hilarious she is because she used to get bullied as a
child, believe it or not.
Bully, all right, feel like. And that is scary. Or does bullying make you stronger? No, it
does because I have to say I was bullied and that's why I'm hilarious
because you have to find laughter in the darkness and if you don't have any darkness growing up,
you're boring. Yeah, that's true. That's why how people are and is funny.
Yeah, they're except you. I don't think it's funny.
Okay, I want to get something off my chest real quick. I know that on past episode you
fucker. Every time you invite me we do some sort of a show about women, women let shows
and people have noticed that I usually take a very aggressive tone and I've seen some
comments on the subreddit calling me an insolid everything and I really want to clarify
I would like to.
How does this might fault? I love the k starts is off I said look at
people don't like the things I
say and this is all your fault
car like whoa whoa whoa whoa
I make us review like only
fans chosen that grifter who was
like vibrating things into
existence and she's like
fleecing women working plus
women out of their money
yeah it's that kind of shit that
kind of gets a rise out of me
when you're like the only fans
whore and you're promoting that
shit to underage girls yeah kind of get angry and I want to be aggressive in my tone and the way I speak about
Hi, sorry, I'm not doing the suicide show that you suggested. Hey, let's share this show about killing yourself. This will be fun
I'm gonna have a show where you're guys
Help me out
Yeah, I thought that could be maybe something funny in that one. Okay, mehaka fine.
But I have decided I'm going to clean up my act a little.
I'm not going to sit here and explain in detail why women aren't funny.
Instead, I brought Christopher Hitchens to explain it for me.
That's my clip 13.
The women don't need to be funny.
But for most men, if they can't make women laugh, they are out of the evolutionary contest.
They're never gonna get laid.
Most men are fantastic on a tractor.
What women see in them is mysterious
to most men as well as most women.
If you can't make them laugh, you don't have a chance.
With women, there's no need to be rendering yourself
attractive to men in that way.
We already find your attractive thanks. Yeah, I hope that was educational. Yeah, that is
educational. There is something to that by the way, there is a reason why most of
the funniest comedians are bad. I'm not making this up. Yeah, I mean, of course,
it's it's it's self-selects, men like women who laugh at their jokes and women
like men who make them laugh.
And that's how we appropriate it for
Like they peer what was the name Peterson Davidson
Pete David some Pete Davidson fucking hell. Yeah, I like Peter way. What did you say David Peterson? I like that, too. Yeah
This is this is the clip that sums up the show for me right here.
This exhausting. Yeah, it is exhausting. Yeah.
Correct. This show is exhausting because they're just giggling at each other over horse shit
and nonsense and talking about fucking Saturn.
So Saturn is going to be moving. It basically just Saturn is stressing me the fuck out. It's a lot of Saturn with you
No, Saturn's wild. Yeah, Saturn is stressing me out of this point now. I'm like I love about Saturn. Yeah, just don't care that much about Saturn
Stop it already. Oh
I don't know what it is about Saturn. Yeah, right. It it the ring that makes it look cute to them or something?
It must be it. Yes. It's obviously very important. You know, I don't know why, but
so I have some breaking news this just in. I also, I want to tell you guys something else that I
just saw in your charts. So your rising sign page at 18 degrees of Aquarius
is exactly your fourth house, Cusp, which is home and family. So really, my advice is to
take her advice when it comes to figuring out like home and family stuff. So just ask
you. Yeah. So this woman's advice is to listen to her friend. Hey, your friend who doesn't
have a husband or kids or a family,
whatever she says you should do, that's what you should do. That sounds like terrible advice.
It's also very lazy. It's also the lazyest advice I've ever.
It is lazy. I think she does have a boyfriend or a husband or something that was
cragged that they were talking about. She is dating somebody. Yeah, she's dating a guy.
She also sounds miserable.
So why should anybody take her advice?
Yeah, no, she's not doing well.
She's pointed out multiple times.
Here's another clip that I have.
And apparently there's this thing about becoming
your own daddy is a thing that they talk about on here.
This is why you become your own daddy.
You learn how to...
I love that phrase.
Yeah, it's the best.
And Satka Saturn is the daddy's daddy of the zodiac.
It kind of sounds like, using a dildo on yourself.
I'm going to become my own daddy tonight.
Yeah, I got you, dad.
Can I watch?
I'm going to do that.
Sounds cool.
I know it's a meme at this point, but if you like, it's rough.
These are the kind of women to date.
And these girl boss types are always into this shit.
Like, I'm gonna be my own daddy, fuck the patriarchy.
Yeah, you just want to be tied to a bet, don't you?
It loses all of you. I can tell.
I can tell. Not to be too sexist.
But, um, I'll play you the clip where, um, this is the only part of the entire podcast that made me laugh.
And it wasn't even their joke that's clip 8.
I'm obsessed with a beta fish.
And his name is swim shady.
That's right.
I'm shady. I'm like okay, that's that's pretty fucking clever.
At a pet shop that came up with it.
It's not even their joke.
But it's shocking to me that of the hours I listened to this show, there was not one
thing said that struck me as interesting or funny or witty.
The at least two women sit there and talk to each other.
They don't seem to do anything like that.
They just have a conversation.
But also, what is with pot?
Why is a conversation interesting to anyone?
If you're in a conversation, that's what they do.
Listen to other people just conversing about
their fucking lives is so boring.
Why is that a show?
Who decided that was a show?
Lonely people.
Oh, is that what it is?
I'm guessing.
All right, thank you.
Thanks for reminding me.
Why podcast? Well, even if you're lonely, you just go watch TLC again, watch
an IDF. The answer is 600 pounds or like the 1000 pound sisters or something. It's way
more interesting drama going on than to boring white ladies talking to each other about Jupiter
and Saturn. I don't know. I get the sense and maybe I'm way off on this. That it's easier
to become successful at podcasting if you have a female audience,
because they'll put up with nonsense for days.
They don't give a shit.
They just want to take a picture.
They're your friend.
It works.
People like you and I, Usman,
we have no clue about this entire sector of money,
money to be made, but they are selling on stadiums.
And this must be why, uh,
let's, that's the, that's the answer.
Let's, let's, let's, let's,
let's stay.
I get my point though.
It's small theater.
Okay.
Fine.
The point remains.
They sell outs.
They sell out and they seem to be making big money and they seem to be touring it.
It is, it is impressive.
And yeah, clearly it works.
It's working for them.
So I mean, it doesn't hurt to have a really hot chick
on the show too.
That's usually a good part of the formula.
Probably, but I don't think that's why women watch this.
Yeah, yeah, good point.
I mean, they're on a reality show,
which is probably why women watch it.
My friends from the reality show of a podcast,
I'm gonna watch that.
They're my friends.
They're not your friends.
They're not.
They're not.
You don't have friends.
I wanna be friends with the Slate and Sisters,
I mean, to be fair.
I kinda get it.
I kinda get it.
I can't get it.
I can't get it.
I listen to her podcast.
She's not hot.
Did you have more clips because I feel free?
No, I think that's all I have on this one
So go ahead and they talk about
Celebrities uploading photos of their children and they do not understand why some people care about their privacy while also bragging about like major milestones That's clip nine
But you know those celebrities who will be like I don't put my children
But then they'll post a photo and put like I'm an emoji over the child's face and I'm like, why do we do that?
Like we get it you have a child, but like you're gonna put an emoji over it. Why'd you even post a photo and put like, I'm an emoji over the child's face. And I'm like, why do we do that? Like, we get it.
You have a child, but like, you're going to put an emoji over it.
Why'd you even post the photo?
Cause you like tell you looked in it.
I don't know what my stance on that is.
Well, the answer is simple, right?
People want to, they like sharing happy things.
Like I do.
I, I, I, I'm very happy that I'm not married. I'm not trolling anybody by the way announcement
I would like to announce this I want people to know that I'm married
I do not want them to know who I'm married to because fucking assholes on the internet will always go after your family first
I'm not a sad guy. People put
Baby emojis on their fucking babies
They want you to know that they just had a child.
It's a fun news, but they don't want you to fucking dox the kid and talk shit about it
and talk about how you want to fuck it and whatnot.
Take care of who my fake world talks.
I don't think they have the same haters that we have, guys.
I don't think that's what they're going to be.
Yeah, I mean.
A point is that just what like the past few years have scared me off, like sharing private
information about myself, like private details.
I don't have an issue with you knowing that I am married, I have a wife, have a mother,
have a sister.
I do have a problem with you knowing who they are because I know that, you know, I run
my mouth on the internet.
I just been saying that he's married so much.
I think it's a shame.
I don't know.
You know what I mean?
It keeps saying that we're never going to have certain to think that, let's see. So Doug from whose right was involved, this sounds like a shame. I don't know. You know what I mean? Keep saying that we're never gonna have starting to think that, let's see.
So Doug from whose right was involved,
this sounds like a bit.
I bet it was a bit.
He is an ordained reverence to Burns out.
It's Cardiff hit the flower.
Right, exact card is the flower girl.
This all sounds like a bit to me.
Cardiff doesn't have a clue.
I can believe it.
I believe your lies. Someone's gonna believe it. I believe your lies.
Someone's got to do it.
The believe all chaos.
What was I saying?
Anyway, they don't understand why people would like to share happy news, but still remain
private.
Right.
At some point, they talk about a female serial killer from, I don't know what the
year this is from, but that's clip 10, the setup.
Okay, I have to end the year this is from, but that's clip 10, the set up.
Okay, I have to end the podcast with one thing.
Okay.
This woman, Julia Tofana.
Okay.
I saw her online.
She's the world's biggest female serial killer.
She's killed.
Yeah, let's just end it on a really light note.
Have an amazing rest of your day, everyone.
This is important.
And I hope this inspires people.
This was back in the Renaissance days.
She killed over 600 men.
Oh, this is inspiring.
Okay, good.
This is inspirational.
It is inspiring.
And it is inspiring because obviously these men deserve to die because back in the day
women could not get divorced from their husbands. That's clip 11. I see. Okay.
Divorce was like not a thing. Yeah, divorce was not a thing. So she was like either you live your life miserable or he dies. He dies.
Like you have to pray that there's like a war that he's like going to go away to. But then you run into he could just play dead.
But then you run into he could just play dad
My wife so they're talking about this lady last week. She was literally
She was selling poisons perfume or something to women to kill their husbands with and all these women used it because again They couldn't get a divorce it's you know if your choices murder or just a miserable life
Maybe just try to work things out before you take a human life
I don't know I don't think that would be laughing at this if it was, you know, reversed and a bunch of men were going around
poisoning their wives. Right. Because they're fucking tired of the nagging all day.
Don't get me wrong. I think praying for war is a very noble thing to do, but that's
enough. I mean, they do a lot of it today too. It's like, well, you got to bastardize
your children because you're sick of your
husbands. Think twice, be very spray that fucking perfume bottle in this face. This one
I was surprising. So I don't know if it's true on YouTube as well in the episode you
watch, but they end their episodes with like a solid two or three minutes of advertising,
which I don't know who the fuck would sit through at the end of a podcast for advertising.
I'm going to skip that shit. I really don't know who the hell how the hell they would possibly get any clicks on that, but um, this ad
particularly stood out to me, uh, clip 12, my last. Okay, so I don't want to get all parental on everyone, but I think it's time
we have the talk. You know, the one I'm talking about is that three letter word that ends in X. You'll probably experience this a few times in your life.
And no, it's not that one I'm talking about, a tux.
And when you need a tux, the best place to go
and get one is the black tux.
If...
Carl looked Christ falling.
I just want to look...
Sorry.
What man is listening through the show?
Why are you selling these toxic points to?
Yeah, that's a really good point.
Not the target demo on this one.
It was odd to me.
Maybe Gadoos, I guess, could be, could be.
But nonetheless, like I said, at the end of the episode,
at a point where nobody's going to listen to this,
to an audience where men are the best minority.
They must have, they really got a good deal
on that ad spot.
Well, are they even real ad spots?
And they're just shoving them at the end
and just pretending to have an eye shot.
They even does.
And it's funny because at the end,
I was listening to, that didn't pull clips from,
but they were talking about how these influencers
just do ad reads all the time
or just are promoting products and telling you what to buy. And they're like, yeah, I mean, obviously they're full
of shit. They're just telling you the bike and all the time. And also, check out our sponsor.
Like, wait, that's weird. So I do have one more clip to play.
Dan, a lot of ads, though. I do one more clip to play for you. And this is fun because
it's stupid. It's an oxymoron.
Wait, so explain our chart.
So you both have your alleo son, your escorpio son,
both fixed signs.
You are escorpio rising,
you're an Aquarius rising, both fixed signs.
You're a Virgo moon,
you're a Pisces moon, both mutable signs.
So what's really cute about this
is that you guys are both hard asses, but then also super softies. You know, that's true.
That doesn't make any sense, Rick. What do you mean that's true? You're both, what's
great is that you guys are both hard and soft. Oh, yeah, you got us. You're picking
them out. What does that mean? Again, you're both this made up Pokemon shit.
You're a fire type, I'm a water type.
It's like, okay, I mean, you can't tell me
not to infantilize women and then do this child of shit
at the same time, I'm sorry, but I'm going to question
whether or not you should be have the right to vote.
You're doing it to yourself at this point.
That is the problem here.
It's like, why don't men respect women?
Because we're listening. Because we're actively listening to what you're saying. That's why it's the problem here. It's like, why don't men respect women? Cause we're listening.
Cause we're actively listening to what you're saying.
That's why it's the problem.
Not all women, of course, just female podcasters.
Is what I mean.
Okay, I want to play a song that came in
from irrational times on YouTube,
at the Blown Gas Kit on Twitter.
This is fantastic. on YouTube at the Blown Gas Kit on Twitter.
This is fantastic.
It's been making the rounds the last day or so,
but I definitely want to do include it on our show here.
The chat zoom, mock is a really cool guy He steals credit cards in his spare time I can't see any commodity cards, he's pretty broke He doesn't make much from telling jokes
Do you remember that time when you were young in the mornings with your stepdad?
You used to make a copy, but if it was called,
you'd be pretty bad.
Nobody likes you not even your girl.
Kevin, we as you want to make fun of you.
But your new world's greatest comic, that's what you're insane.
But I've seen your act and it's pretty gay.
Do you remember that time in the living room?
Your mom was getting things from behind.
And you walked in inside the whole thing.
They were butt naked and listening to whims.
It's not all the car, but you.
Carl and Daron are making a cry.
Don't they know that he was growing junior.
But he's got a body like blade and a head full of rocks.
He's our suspicious loser.
He's chat too much.
Well, dad, the bad guy.
Oh, that was a fun one.
All right.
So I can't have Kai on the show Without getting an update on our buddy Ethan and Ralph from the Ralph retort from kill stream
I
Think my buddy dick was just out in Mexico visiting him. He's he's moved down to Mexico now. Oh, I think so. Yeah, he was
Complaining about how it was hard to get there
And the dick show this week
explaining about how it was hard to get there. And the Dicksha this week.
Yeah, Ralph also docs the location
of this Mexican hovel already drunkenly.
That is, I don't even know where to begin with the tail.
The thing about Ralph is that he's wildly entertaining
and he produces so much content.
The problem with Ralph is that he's wildly entertaining
and produces too much content.
And you cannot clip all of this.
There's so much.
This man humiliates himself on a daily basis.
In a way that most low cows don't even do in a year.
Like you can't clip all of it anymore.
No, it's too much.
So I want to point this out because I actually have a clip here
from a recent show.
I didn't realize he doxed himself,
but apparently people know where he lives.
And he starts off the show talking about someone wanting to come to Mexico to beat him up
and explaining that that would be a bad idea.
But I don't know if you guys know this was actually against the law.
You can't just loiter outside people's houses in Mexico, like you can in the United States.
I actually put you in jail for shit like that.
I tried to self-cog this in Twitter that would not be a good idea to come by
one of the most heavily police neighborhoods in the city,
where a lot of wealthy people and try to
star something out in front of my house.
So the thing whenever I check in on what Ethan Ralfa's up to, the only thing that's ever
happening is just drama.
There's never content.
Ethan Ralfa is a chick.
No. It's his whole world. It's just drama. There's never content. Ethan Rope is a chick. No.
It's his whole world.
It's just drama.
And just like, oh, someone wants to fight,
and then there's gonna be a fight,
and then I have this illegitimate kid,
I got served papers.
It's just like drama, not sound.
Am I watching a soap opera or a political commentator?
Because I cannot tell what's happening with this guy.
Seems like he's doing good on his own,
but he could team up with Chad.
They seem to be cut from the same mold.
That's true.
Wouldn't be the worst idea.
Okay, so here's what happened.
You are aware that he's married now, right?
Yes, I've met his lovely wife a couple of times.
She actually been to my house.
Always with marriage, with Kyle,
but so I'm just, you want to shut up about that?
I know, it's like a competition.
I'm copying Ralph.
People used to mock him and his now wife may
because people would say, okay,
she's gonna be a forever girlfriend
because Ralph is the type of man to be a man
and actually put a ring on it and devote himself
to anyone other than himself and commit to a woman
even though they have a child now. And Ralph, you have, okay, I've said this before, but you have to understand, if you want
to explain to yourself the behavior of Ethan Ralph, everything he does is out of spite.
He went to Portugal out of spite, got a disaster kicked.
He went back to Portugal out of spite, just to prove that he could go to Portugal without
getting his ass kicked.
And got his ass kicked again.
He married this woman just out of spite to prove wrong the people who said that he wouldn't
marry her.
And then a couple of weeks ago, actually, yeah, a couple of weeks ago now, he goes on Twitter
and explains how they were about to get on a flight to Rome but may have
absconded with their child and run away at the airport from him. And people said, what's
going on? Why are you also publishing your family drama on Twitter, bro? If you're having
a bad time, you should keep this private. And Ralph openly tweeted, I don't have a family.
I have a whore who claims to be my wife. This was not even three weeks after his wedding, after his, by the way, I was
the wedding where he got married by Elvis and personally.
What was his supposed to get married at the Boeing
alley when they had that event last year?
Well, the theory is that Dick kept dodging him and just coming up with excuses
why he can't go to Portugal with them.
Right.
And pretend that his leg is broken and pretend that he missed a flight or some shit
I couldn't take the bowling.
I don't think that's a theory.
Thank you.
I think I'm here.
Dick, they go to the bowling alley.
He tore his fucking bicep off of his arm.
Bowling.
He didn't rope his bad news.
I swear to God because Dick is supposed to go to Portugal with him.
Dick broke his foot walking his dog.
Then Ethan does this bowling and everything.
He's supposed to get married or something and then Dick goes to it and terraces muscle.
And then Dick's supposed to visit Ethan Rope in Mexico.
He flies to Dallas to his connection and the flight left without him.
And so he had a fly all the way back to LA again.
The after flying to Dallas, like everything that
tried to say happens with mixed problems.
This is typical Saturn return bullshit.
And you're right.
Good point, yes.
Because bed planets karma, who knows?
Who knows?
Anyway, Ralph has been, so he goes on this fucking
rachful seething bender where he causes wife or whore
publicly on Twitter as all Christian men do of course
is that manly alpha male Christian thing to do is call
your newly wedded bride a whore on the internet. He attacks
her father and he implies that his wife's sister sucked
his dick
and he came in her mouth and she swallowed
while he's tagging her father, by the way.
Yeah, speculation is this is what they fought about
on the plane.
They get kicked off the plane
and initially he denied this
but then people found the air traffic control records
on publicly he disclosed websites
of the pilots calling into the air traffic tower saying, hey, we have an
unruly drunk passenger. We need to return to the gates. So that gets published. He admits,
yeah, okay, I got kicked off the plane bitch, but it was all a work. It was all a work, which
Vinnie will explain to you. A work is basically like, you know, I'm the heel and wrestling,
and I'm doing the script that thing to trick everyone.
And so I guess he got himself kicked up there playing.
Of course, right.
Yeah.
It was all just a joke.
Anyway, she returns to get a kick down an airplane.
Everyone loves that bit.
Yeah, calling your whore, calling your wife a whore on the internet.
So always a good tune.
You'll be doing it too.
Got you.
Good.
So for a while, he lays low in Mexico Mexico to I think you moved there last year.
I'm pretty sure. Yeah. And last week I think at this point, it's been a few days. He
goes on stream as he does drunkenly and he goes to he gets banned on Twitter, by the way,
because I guess trolls, there's a speculation
that like he lost his blue check and apparently when he lose your blue check, you lose all
of, all of the reports that usually are submitted to get ignored if you have a blue check, but
when you lose it, they all of a sudden go through it the same time or something. So he
loses his Twitter account. He tries to sign up to a website called something like chugbuds.lawler something.
He drunkenly types on his password into the password field and he hits that little eye emoji
to show the password for some fucking reason to the entire internet.
And turns out Ralph is one of those people who uses the exact same email address and password
everywhere.
So people log into his email accounts
is a Yahoo email account.
Illarity and so's. So one of the things that people are now dunking on them for is because
around the, um, man's man, the alpha male who likes to go around and kind of chop you.
Am I breaking up free?
Yes. Oh, I can hear you fine.
I don't know if it's just a website or a good one.
Okay.
Well, if the man's a man who likes to, you know, whenever he talks about me, he likes to
call me a bag at like 10 times a second.
People on earth and email from him from 2013, which I'm not going to read.
This very homophobic man wrote this to himself for some forkneries. He says, I just lost the one person I could turn to no matter what a week ago.
I lived with him for four years and he was just 26 years old. A year ago I betrayed him by having
sex with someone else. I began dating the person I cheated on him with but continued speaking to him.
He was an alcoholic and I was lacking physical passion for him.
I still never really let go and I hoped maybe we would reconcile one day.
Well, I never got that chance because he died suddenly while experiencing excruciating
pain from liver and kidney failure.
I wasn't there even though he was there no matter what.
I can't seem to get over the pain of this loss of his loss or the guilt of what I did
It's overwhelming my mind and my thoughts and I don't know how to go on
It's a constant blanket of darkness and simultaneous isolation inside of me
I can't take it or get on with my life
That's the gaius thing I've ever heard of my day
I'm so upset to myself
Wait a second. That's the gayest thing I've ever heard of my life. So all the senses themselves.
Wait a second.
He's a fan.
He wrote that to himself on an email?
Yeah, this is an email from Ethan Ralfa Grocchent
to Ethan Ralfa Grocchent.
He then came out and he...
Well, the time was not just moved fastness.
This is news to me, Kai.
I don't know about any of this shit. Yeah, yeah, he was living with his boyfriend
Who did he shit his boyfriend with like a girl or a boy?
We don't know but he's my love wealth why everybody loves Ralph for no everything almost everything is
It's by the own hand Ralph. That's why I like to say he didn't have to come out and confirm that the email is real, but he did.
He came out and he said, oh, no, that's actually,
I installed a key logger on my ex girlfriend's computer
and that was her typing and I was getting email updates
from her computer.
So it basically that verifies that the email is real.
First of all, I don't know if Ralph is like smart enough
to install a key logger on anyone's computer
and it's kind of convenient that the email
will be asking you this.
Or the contains the specific.
I was gonna say, so a key logger is gonna log
every key stroke.
So if you hit the raw, you spell something raw,
you're gonna delete it, you're gonna go back,
you're gonna re-type some things.
So if this is just written out, correct correct that it's not a key logger.
Like a confession letter, like a confession to yourself, it reads more like I'm trying to get this off my chest.
It doesn't read like communications that you were spying on on somebody's keyboard.
What else is out this guy's chest? I don't want to know.
A lot of fat.
Okay, that too. A lot of fat.
So, people troll him. They go through his finances and he makes a lot of money by the way.
He makes like, I think almost 200 grand a year.
He talks about how much money he makes.
That was his big thing with me.
He makes so much money.
He does.
It's very surprising.
And I'll get to actually who he makes that much money off of.
People I've also been logging into his specific super chat, the mission website that he uses and unsubscribing his reoccurring donors.
Whoa, that's fucked up. I wouldn't do that to anybody. I'm not into fucking.
I mean, first of all, okay, in case they don't know, obviously logging into somebody else's account
is actually a federal crime.
You can't do this.
What people do because they're trolls because Ralph like asks for it.
It's not like sharing a net for the internet.
Yeah.
No, it isn't.
So it's that cool.
Although Netflix might argue otherwise.
They want people fuck with them.
They find this financial information.
They found out that he gambles on the internet
He gambles and the one like 15 bucks or something and he is an 80 thousand dollars of debt
Around that figure I believe and because Ethan Ralph has all of his
Information on the internet people can also run his credit score. Wait. Oh, I'm so disfair
He's 80,000 in debt. Did he also think the Eagles were gonna win the Super Bowl because I'm with him on that one
That was that old account was bullshit
I'm stated by that. I'm sorry
Now keep him I collect all of this information in your head
He's 80,000 in debt makes 200 grand a year almost maybe more depending on the how much his life shows so
He has credit score is fair when people are running this credit score. This man
could fix his life. He's not far gone. He makes very decent money. He has a wife. He has
a child. He has debts, but he could pay it off. He makes very good money. If he just
stopped gambling, drinking and popping pills, he could fix his life in literally a year.
Wow. He's really hard things to kick right there.
Guy, I mean, the guy would just stop me to drag things and be good for him.
Well, that's, that's the problem.
I'm nearly saying it is.
It's a once again, his own downfall is him.
He's doing this to himself.
Um, anyway, he gets hacked and he threatens litigation on Twitter.
He got his Twitter account back.
He cries everywhere and he says,
fuck you guys, I'm gonna sue.
It's illegal to hack into my account, which is fair,
but I mean, where the fuck are you gonna?
It's gonna be very difficult to prove all of this stuff.
Fast forward to, I think last week, Ralph starts,
oh man, where do I even begin? Like I said, there's so much about the sky.
Let's talk about his pay picks.
Let's talk about why he makes $20,000.
This is what was happening today.
I pulled some clips and we'll get into you,
but you have way more information than I was planning.
This is great.
I don't even have a bumper for this.
I'm glad.
I know, right?
I keep up with him to the best of my abilities.
It's also a large part is an account on Twitter called Augusto Kino
Shay who tags me sometimes in the Ralph drama. It keeps up with because of the guns news network. And I've Can you guys hear this? Yeah. Yes?
So Ralph has a pay pick called BamBigdyBam, BamBam, as he goes by.
Ralph has this plan.
He wants to buy a new compound in Mexico that would cost him 100 grand.
And he thinks, okay, here's how we're going to go about it.
If four or five of you guys chip in my listeners' paypicks,
and you each pay me 20 grand,
you can come live on the compound with me.
We're gonna have like a big white trash cartel
in Mexico, too.
This is always the beginning of the end right here,
where you start including the paypigs in your lifestyle.
This is not a good idea.
This is, this is how cults get started.
This is, this is,
literally, like, yeah, this is like, all right, well, I'm going to start
to cult now. I go, okay, I was not going to go. Usually they end well, but maybe this one
won't. Yeah, it's going to end in a documentary. Yeah.
So this guy calls in and it's literally the first question that Ralph asks him, which
I might have to scrub a little to find, but he asks, hey, will your girlfriend suck my dick?
Anyway, BamBam, what's up?
Hey, what's up, I mean, I talked to everyone like that.
Always, like the way you hear me speak in that
living room is how I speak to everybody.
Oh, I forgot to mention, by the way,
BamBam talks to his girlfriend
like a complete asshole and just insults her
You know what I mean?
Like so if it's like hey if you tell me that you got something ready, it better be ready and yes, it makes man
She loves that shit all women love that shit
Do you think of course? Do you think she was suck my dick?
Do you think she was suck my dick?
Dude I only fucking do that fuck with legend. So now I'm just what I'm just asking and of course, you know I said in appropriate question. I'm just thinking do you think she was suck my dick like I'm just wondering
I'll make her answer that when she gets
By the way again two Christian men talking to each other. Yeah, this is Christianity
These are two mainly Christian men talking to each other about prostituting their wives
Sounding like a drunk slate insist they're on TLC. Ralph is obviously already fucking shit faced
Antebrinks is now wife onto the stream and listen to how hardcore
Bam-Bam starts sucking their dicks for a chance
to get on the compound.
Pants is beautiful by the way.
You're so amazing on the show the other day with your new stories man.
You're a real fucking asset, Pantsu.
All of us in the chat stand behind you.
We are a Legion behind you, Pantsu.
You're incredible.
Thank you for the kind words.
It's the truth. It's the truth. You are fucking incredible. Everybody knows it.
You're incredible, specimen, man.
We have. We appreciate you so fucking much. Thank you so much for holding a nigga like Ralph
Down. You know, that is such a difficult pass.
You're doing an amazing job, Pantsy.
You're doing an incredible job.
This man is now married in the most beautiful place on earth with the most beautiful woman
on earth.
You know what I'm saying?
With the most beautiful children like thing.
The man he's praising is he's barely able to keep himself from passing out at this moment by the right like Ralph
Is literally leaning off camera because he's that shit faced after calling his wife again a whore just mere weeks prior
Here's the issue they have a falling out you guys turns out bam bam couldn't
Call up the 20 grand. Big surprise because Bam Bam!
We need that Bam Bam!
Damn it, I closed the tab.
Give me one second to find this clip.
Why are you looking for that?
We play a clip I was checking out.
Yes.
Ralph show from this week.
And what's the first thing he says on his show this week?
This is insane.
Feelin good, tropical living suits me well. Why, I hate to live in some cold shit hole
like Rochester, New York. What is with all the shit I got Rochester? Like that seems
to be the thing now. All these long cows are all fucking on board with Rochester sucks for some reason.
And then I only play this clip real quick
because I was playing where he was talking about this guy,
Cog, or someone's gonna come and beat him up.
And so he's, you know,
Cog is the guy who beat him the second time
he was in Portugal.
Oh, okay.
So they have a history.
Well, rather his friends beat him up,
but it was Cog flew there with his buddy.
Okay.
So, so Rob is saying like, don't come to Mexico.
There's a lot of police in my neighborhood.
And but also he also has a fence.
So that's another reason why it's not going to work out.
Plus, I got a 12 fence in front of my house and they got locked up like fucking Don Corleone. I'm like, actually like Scarface.
Every jerk thinks they're Scarface. I find that so obnoxious. You're not Scarface.
He does more drugs than Scarface. That's his only claim to the title.
He's at the end of Scarface snorting that table full of coke and going off the rails.
Getting shots by fucking Mexican authorities. Sure. So I've had the clip. They have a falling
out, like I said, bam, bam, doesn't get the money for him. Bam, bam, super chat, some nonetheless,
which is read by a robot's AI voice, and I'll just play the computer.
which is read by a robot's AI voice and I'll just play it with you.
Hey man, awesome show, but Beardson's weekly sweat is killing it right now.
Oh, I should mention, I mentioned, Ruff is very angry that some guy on cozy.tv called Beardson is apparently getting more views than him. Okay. Who's also a fucking loser, but Ruff is very salty
about this and Bam Bam just pointed out hey Beard Beardson is killing it. Well that's cool. Your wife said she wanted to suck my day.
So that was pretty cool too. She said she would choke down the Ralph and Mel penis.
I thought that was pretty funny that she touched me while on there. She told you she would suck my dick. So I kind of thought that was for me.
All right. So Dawson's life live. He had about five years. So shit face. Yeah.
She was pretty drunk then. Last week she said she'd rather puke than suck your dick.
Is that right? Is that why I saw you like physically a buzer and yellow-edged, what yellow-her and my house?
And how I made you pay my state bill because you're a bitch.
And I didn't pay a goddamn thing.
What did she say about that? And I didn't pay a goddamn thing.
What did she say about that?
And me, making you pay $800 for both of y'all, I said just $400 charge on double because
you're a bitch, Faggot.
What do you think of that?
What did you say about that?
What did you think of that?
You bitch, Faggot.
Also, I miss my that. What'd you say about that? What did you think about that? What did you think about that? Bet your faggot.
Also, I miss my boyfriend.
Yeah.
So this is Ethan Ralph.
Probably Ethan Ralph.
I don't know if he thinks he's a comedian
or he thinks he's funny, but the only thing he ever does
is use naughty words.
That's his whole stick.
He'll say the unword is as we play,
they'll use upslurs and he's like aren't I edgy? Yeah if you were
16 yeah, we're pretty edgy shit. I mean you can use it who gives a fuck but you can't have the
hypocrisy you can't call me a faggot and then have these emails leak about you crying about your
boyfriend that it's the even it doesn't work that way. People are going to mock you, especially when you go around so
hatefully about your own wife.
And you talk about her as a whore who betrayed you and you
don't like her anyway.
And her sister sucked you off and her father is a fucking loser.
It's catching up to my belief.
The marriage should the sham marriage.
It appears because in.
Oh, he said it. He said,
yeah, marriage wasn't me. He's
hiding in place.
I'm kidding. I'm only kidding.
So one of the, oh, I forgot this little tidbit. Um, I don't know if you guys have
heard about Hogwarts legacy, the controversial get a Harry Potter game that just got released
There's a lot of drama around it, but point is on a stream may say hey, I would like this video game and Ralph's set
Fuck you bitch. I'm not buying you that bitch. That's expensive bitch. I'm not spending money on you bitch
And they got on a fight over this and when Ralph got hacked and people locked into his account
They used his saved credit card information to buy made a game.
Oh, that's nice.
It's like a sea because your husband doesn't buy it for you.
That's funny.
He breaks about making six figures.
And I think that kind of soured his relationship with his wife.
So this is again, from the Twitter account Augusto Kinochet, who says, Amanda Morris, and
parenthesis, Loll con enthusiast, tried
to tell Ethan Ralph in parenthesis convicted sex offender that he had too many beers tonight
and I got ugly.
And I am, oops, sorry for that being loud, I am once again going to have to scrub around
a bit.
He thinks I've had enough.
But he essentially starts talking about what a bitch pussy his wife is.
Great.
My wife has just informed me that she thinks I've had enough beer.
That's what she told me to my face.
Now, I'm going to end the show within 10 minutes for girls.
But if you think I haven't had enough beer, you can go ahead and fill it up to the 500 meter because I have to go five hours across Mexico regardless of what this dumbest things.
So, you know, you can fill it up the meter or I can just go drink beer. Oh no. So it's up to you. You tell me,
you tell me what you think. Do you think I've had enough or do you not? Hey, you've had enough.
You've had enough for health for your whole life. And it's up to you. And you coming here and say anything she wants. I hear yelling downstairs like a pussy.
Come here. Say it to my face. Come up here and say it. I saw it sweet, perfectly describing this.
He's talking to his, I don't know who said it, but he's talking to his wife like a guy at a,
at the bar that he wants to fight. Yeah, right. here and say what what is she supposed to do fucking fist fight you
She said I do any beers to my face. Well, yeah, she's having a conversation with you as all say okay
Wait, we just stop drinking now. It's enough
No matter how much of a lunatic she may be at the end of the day
She now has a child like her biological motherly instincts are kicking in
And she's worried. Oh fuck I had a baby with this drunk asshole
Like can you not drink yourself into a blackout every single night and he gets aggressive with her
And I have the same kind of face code if you want to get black out drunk every night
Fine just don't do it on the internet don't turn on your webcam
When you do that every night, fine, just don't do it on the internet. Don't turn on your webcam.
When you do that, it's so easy.
Don't do it on the internet.
Why do you think we end shows?
Yes, that's why we're gonna be off the air soon.
Don't do it on the internet.
Don't do it when you have a child and wife to take care of.
Like she's obviously fucking worried about you
and you're getting aggressive about it.
Yeah.
And I believe that is the most recent
Ralph update, except I think yesterday he was suicide
baiting like a 14 year old girl on reddit.
But I would have to really score.
He also has me blocked on Twitter for some fucking reason.
He's very bad at you guy.
You were talking about him on the official podcast.
I don't tag him and I don't get my Ralph news from his timeline.
I really don't know what the fuck it's supposed to even accomplish.
But he says, I love you guys.
I'm sorry.
Y'all be all right.
Pants whose power fail has been fixed.
I don't know if I'll do a show just kind of done with it.
I think I just need to retire.
Wayne.
Oh, yeah.
Do you want sympathy now?
Oh, please don't retire.
Do we need you? We need to watch you watch MSNBC.
Yeah, and call women whores, especially your own wash. Again, he also tweeted about something
like, oh, this other streamer or network will continue carrying the torch for our movements.
Like, for what movements? Can't have a political movement, right left center doesn't fucking matter
while the leader is calling his own family horse.
All right, so that's a Ralph update.
I have to tell you, and I appreciate the Ralph update
that you just gave us, but like I said,
I was checking out his show from just this week.
And I was blown away by how professional it is.
That's the thing about either Ralph,
he's been doing this a long time.
So he's really good at it. No, why?
Can anybody hear anything?
No, it's his audio. Can you hear my audio?
Can you hear me talking?
Unfortunately.
Yeah.
Can you hear me drinking?
Just my mic.
OK.
OK, you can hear me talking.
OK.
All right, so this goes on for a good 15 minutes.
Out of it.
I would like to show it out, by the uh, the indoor sunglasses as well because his eyes
are all, he's all googly eye now.
Yeah.
Since he got punched in the head like 27 times on Portugal and he's trying to conceal
it.
Yeah, fuck that pretty good.
That's when I endorse that.
But all right.
So then 15 minutes later, he finally fixes the problem.
I think I finally fixed it.
I accidentally muted my whole audio on the whole computer. Yeah.
I shouldn't have sent that out.
No, you should've done it.
Because I don't even see how that was allowed
to happen by the way.
Yes.
So wait, as I'm watching this, Kaya, I finally realize why I don't like Ethan Ralph.
He's not a podcaster or a broadcaster.
He's a streamer.
He has a podcast, but he's a streamer.
He just goes on and you just watch him get drunk and be an idiot.
Streamers are for children. Streamers are not for adults who enjoy this content.
No, this is why nobody can watch them.
This is why the overwhelming majority of people
who are Ralph fans, trolls,
they only watch the highlights that
patients and angelic people
thankfully clipped for us in our convenience.
You cannot sit through these streams.
It's mostly silence.
And there's so many streamers like this,
who I don't, they just put on a YouTube video and they
appear to be commentating on it, but they don't say anything for like three minutes at a time take Ralph again. He literally will fall asleep in the middle of his own stream.
It's it's bizarre to me, but he makes six figures a year during this and it's fucking victory lap. So he's talking about how
six figures a year. And it's fucking victory lap.
So he's talking about how this guy ran to bot.
Like called him to a show or something
and he's all proud of himself for destroying Randbot.
The only desire to see what Pansy did to
brand bot.
First off, Rambot, I like destroyed Rambot.
So badly last night it was.
I let my bitch come in and take care of my light work.
Notice your spec, you know,
that's just how we talk from the dirty South.
So his wife Pantsu or May or whatever you want to come.
So he's explaining that he destroyed Rambo last night.
He let Pantsu come in and destroy Randbot.
And then he so proud of himself,
he's gonna play the audio of it for us out of this show.
Hmm, let's play this first though.
You're working on a camera,
and just the whole time, man.
He's swatting.
I did.
He swatted, swat.
I didn't swat anybody.
He swatting, swatting, swatting, swatting. Oh, but you fucked up. That day he want it. I didn't want it. You tried to, you tried to, you tried to go up.
But you got that they got like the fucking cup in your house.
No.
And two days after that, you tried to flop me.
Rand, you sound like saying,
I'm saying, I ain't fucking saw this.
I guarantee you, I guarantee you nothing will come
and watch you saying tonight.
See, this is the type of content. I can't listen to guy
Yeah, people screaming at each other and then declaring victory after I destroyed them
Just something like to idiot screaming at each other. I know now I could be around
I don't know how he watches himself and he witnesses and he hears his own voice being absolutely
and he witnesses and he hears his own voice, being absolutely far gone, blackout drunk,
and he thinks, yeah, this might be look cool.
And the swatting thing, by the way,
I don't know how confirmed this is
or what the rumor is, so don't take this as confirmed,
fucking camera, don't take this as confirmed,
but the rumor is that Ralph calls his local police department
to swat people in America.
He called the Mexican cops to have a few,
a bunch of YouTubers in America like Andy Warfsky
and Medi-Kur swatted.
Okay.
And apparently they got swatted.
I don't think that was Ralph
because I don't, I definitely don't think Ralph
is smart enough to like get away from the cops.
I don't think the Mexican police swatted
as I can.
I can't pull probably, yeah.
Yeah, I also really think that. But the Mexican cops actually knocked at his door, to like get a little bit of police. I have a catapult probably. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
But the Mexican cops actually knocked at his door apparently and asked like, what's going
on?
Why are you calling us?
Are you okay?
So yeah, accidentally, like not swatted himself, but again, he just humiliates himself.
And now the Mexican cops, they have to deal with some fucking white pig in their city,
flexing his money around drunkenly.
It's every time I check it on this guy, I dislike it more.
I don't know how he's able to pull that off.
By the way, we did the Ralfa Mania in New Jersey back in January.
My buddy, Alex, I'm supposed to be there.
I don't think he ended up going to that.
I don't know if you know anything about Ralfa Mania, the wrestling event.
He did. I don't know if you know anything about Ralph and Manie or the wrestling event. He did.
I only heard of it.
Now he got served papers.
So he's in the US just for this one event
and the authority shop and serve him papers.
He has so many fucking restraining orders.
And again, he is a convicted sex offender, yes,
with a right, because he,
he put out what it's called, called a much suspended sentence. Yes,
I put a bench for his ex who has his other kid, right?
Yeah, I don't get it.
Vickers. Yes.
Yeah.
Reach that to me, by the way, I got some details wrong about him when I was talking on
the official podcast and she messaged me on Twitter.
This is apparently known and she messaged me and said, well, you know,
Ralph has this attitude that he's very pro-life
and very Christian, but at the time,
he was downright pressuring me to get an abortion
for the child.
Oh boy.
It's like that.
That's how I get lucky.
Oh boy.
No, it's not a good look.
Again, it's hypocrisy because he likes to call Andy Worsky
an abortionist because of how I get an abortion at some point. So that's good. Oh my god. I want to see that
He thought I want to bring on
America's favorite potato
To join the show with us
Oh
Carden is celebrating president's week here. Yes. Yeah, he's proud Americans. He's got his
Trump potato to his Trump wig on. Thank you. Thank you. Hi, it's player to meet you I was I was sitting with Doug the last week watching all your wedding videos. It was very nice
Oh, thank you. I'm putting
them up on my YouTube later today. Subscribe now. All right, we got to catch it, Ali. And
are you guys ready to catch it, Ali? And this is my favorite game right now. Thank you.
game right now. Thank you. It's pretty good. So like, Opie review in a beer. It's not bad. It's time for everyone's favorite new game show to catch an alien. Are you ready to play?
to catch one of the little potato sleeping
Michael white Greg Woods
Steve Steve Wood Terry horn
Gary Sam's you know these guys are all good guys. They're good-hearted heartworking
I'm happy to shirt good guys, you know, they all have respect for the issues and let's face again. Sorry, the guy who's
thing this show, yeah, I'm laughing at the cut out of
himself, but I don't know. Cardiff added that's why it's just
a fucking good. Yeah, thank you. Sorry to interrupt.
Good guys, they're good-hearted, hard-working, talented, good guys.
They all have respect for their relationships and they don't do problems, they don't do
drugs, they don't drink, they don't do stupid stuff, and they bring it.
They believe in what we're doing, they believe in the project.
Oh, you know what they say?
Oh, boy. What did Tommy say next?
Here are your choices.
Number one.
I hope love is blind is one of the answers because that's what Tommy was.
I was out of the room.
You know what they say.
Love is blind.
Let's see if Carter comes up with that one.
Not that obvious.
Okay. Let's see if Cardiff comes up with that one. Not that obvious, no.
Stupid is as stupid is.
Beats.
Some folks are like pennies,
two faced and worthless.
Huh.
Next.
Gucci Mane said it best.
All my friends are fake, fake, fake.
Four.
Don't blame a clown for acting like a clown.
E. Fool me once.
But not twice. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha to catch unalien. I'm gonna go with the last one you are who you are.
You are. So round. That's what I'm thinking. Kai, what do you think, buddy?
I agree. Yeah. That's that's the most Tommy.
That's the most time. All right. But we got to be careful though, because if we don't get this right,
that card of wins. And we don't want that to happen. But he's a cress.
What's that you?
It's between the pennies or the clown and I'm going to go with two the pennies.
All right.
Cardiff, what do you think?
Pennies are too faced.
The clown.
They bring it.
They believe in what we're doing.
They believe in the project.
Oh, you know what they say you are who you are around
Yeah, yeah, I said that is bad and the negative happened the drug is cheating and everything is the half the park
I am fucking killing it on the show. I'm going to the last edition of the catch and oh no the bus contest
Never
Keep cheating. You know what I think I think it's gonna be like that thing where I end up hosting the show I'm so a nutmer. Cheating. You know what I think? I think it's gonna be like that thing
where I end up hosting this show.
I'm so good at it.
Who's the guy from Jeffery?
You're gonna be like Miriam Bialik?
Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
Ken Jennings, I think, is the anyway.
I think Tommy looks like a government deep fake, right?
Yeah, he knows that his audience is a natural.
He doesn't look like a human.
Right. I actually thought he was from Turkey, but...
No.
No, he wouldn't get beat up in Turkey.
You can't.
Don't call me a rat, buddy.
I'm not your buddy, friend.
The negative happen.
The drug use, the cheating, and everything is the after party.
What happens after you farm? Do you go out or do you go back to the hotel?
What was your routine? I don't remember anything, but I do remember waking up the next morning
in a pile of my own vomit in my bed wondering how I got there.
Wondering how I got there.
Just he got very packed all for this week. Come back next week to find out if you have the party power to catch an alien brought
to you by... It's my new theme music now.
No, it's overdoing.
For those of you who are listening, which is the majority of people are hearing the show.
He was promoting sub-reddit surfing with Vinnie Pauline on Monday,
Monday's at APA, Eastern time, US time.
Yes, APA with the US.
What time is that in Turkey?
In the morning, I honestly see it even though anymore.
Probably like 4 a.m.
So generally when you're watching subreddit surfing Kai, are you eating breakfast?
Are you eating lunch?
Kai's just back to bed.
Kai's just back to bed.
He's an America.
Yeah, I have high fructose corn syrup now for every meal.
Congratulations.
Well, I just found out, but now I will tune in.
I am a big, I wouldn't say fan of reddits,
but reddid is obviously a website.
You can read for a great shot in Florida.
It's a website by Cuckold Petafiles
for Cuckold Petafiles.
So there's some pretty funny content on there.
That's their slogan.
Sit up for it. Guys, their slogan. So not for it.
Guys, what have we done today?
Lots.
We did it all.
Giggly Squad, page,
Dessorbo, very attractive woman.
I suggest you do a Google image search on her.
We checked out Ethan Raul, Chad Zumak.
We had a new fun song about him.
If you want to hear me talking about Chad,
talking about me from the latest Kumias Cucks,
that is on the bonus episode I did about Alex Jones.
We did that at the end of that.
We caught an alien, I caught an alien.
Kai and caught an alien.
So you know what that means?
It's time for everyone's favorite part of the show. The team.
The team.
The team.
The team.
The team.
The team.
The team.
The team.
The team.
The team.
This is the part of the show we play,
Clif in the podcast that we'll be reviewing
on the next episode of Who Are These Podcasts?
I'm happy to say we'll be back again this weekend
coming up with my buddy Mike Geary.
That's Blind Mike from the Boine Mike Project.
And of course, who are the socials Thursdays at 6 p.m.
I'm wearing from Carter to how to do this.
Here is the podcast that will be reviewing.
Hello everybody.
Welcome back to another episode of I Rewatch I Carly.
Bram, bram, bram, bram, bram.
By the time that this episode comes out,
it will be my 27th birthday.
Oh my God.
So old.
So old.
So old.
I literally retiring.
I'm a grandmother.
I don't want to spoil it, but you know, Carly and them have some things to say about old
people in this episode that we will talk about later. This is a show called I Rewatch I Carly and them have some things to say about old people in this episode that we will talk about later.
This is a show called I rewatch I Carly.
And this is a suggestion from Ostradama in Anara Discord.
Actually, from Patreon, he sent me this note to check out I rewatch I Carly.
And that sounds like a more fun show than we did today.
I actually know that try watch that when I was young.
I do not get these grown-ass people
who watch children's shows though.
It is very, very weird to me.
Like whenever they reboot a long dead children's series
like the Rugrats or I Carly or something,
and you have these like 37 year old men chiming in,
what their opinions about it,
like why are you watching it?
You don't have kids.
I'm gonna pull it all out and post
because I am doing a new show called
Salute Salute Your Shorts
where I go back or you watch every
Salute Your Shorts episode.
I'm kidding.
What are we gonna say, guys?
Well weren't those the stars of Icaroli
doing like a watch along?
I don't think so.
I think these are girls who grew up with that.
You know, they reboot it.
They reboot it.
But without one of the main actresses,
the one of the two main actresses,
I forget her name,
Jeanette McCurdier, something because she wrote a book saying,
oh yeah, by the way,
I was abused on the Nickelodeon set.
And the directors took naked photos of me in the changing room
when I was wearing a bikini and my mom was fingering me.
And they're like, okay.
Yeah, the producer of the show,
who produced a lot of the shows on Nickelodeon,
had very inappropriate relationships.
Yeah, see at a foot fetish.
And so we're pool parties,
we're adults were invited at his house,
and so we come out of the creep hall.
So what a weirdness.
So I got there.
Kay, I don't normally play voice mails before the end of the show, but there's one here
that I wanted to play for you, my friend.
Hey, Kay, I'm sorry, Cardiff spoiled it, and I really respect Doug for saying it's just
already tell.
I just want to say, if there's a way of trying to get to the US, congrats on becoming more of an American than Ethan Ralph will be out.
There you go, kay, I could grant.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I mean, I didn't run away from the US like Ethan did to a Dodge child payment.
Is that really the reason why he moved back to go in your assessment?
It is pretty much the route. I mean, again, he got served when he returned to the US briefly.
It is a rumor that he tried to move away
because he constantly docks himself.
So people have like the docks saying equivalent of a debt pool
to see, okay, how many days until Ralph docks is Mexican house.
And while it happened last week,
when he showed everyone his password,
his one password that he uses for everything.
So there's actually like people fighting by home and feeling
the right audience filming the truck with his license.
Fascinating.
Can you just start breaking up?
Sorry. No, you decided breaking up.
He's trying to get a robot voice going.
Okay, sorry. Thank you you just started breaking up. You started getting your robot voice going. Okay, sorry.
I knew you had so much.
Thank you for the voicemail.
Will you be featured on an upcoming season of 90 day fiance, Kaya?
And you know, we unironically considered it because I thought it would be fun to have
like fake fights on TV.
Yeah.
That'd be amazing.
Because, yeah, we actually went on the TLC website to see like, okay, what's the sign up
form?
What's the rules here?
But it just looked too tedious.
Too tedious?
To get a reality television down, it's going to be, come on.
They're not going to take us.
I think you have to understand the, like, veracity or the, like TLC recruiters are pretty fucking smart.
They're not just gonna take some troll like me and, you know, watch me fake fight with
my girlfriend and go, oh yeah, it's good content.
No, they want actual dummies who actually hit their fucking girlfriend, then, you know,
Filipinos, slum queens who actually hit the American they're dating for the crank
car.
That's true.
It's not Dr. Phil producers who think that Dick Masterson's a real person. That's a good point. Right. Right. Because then Dr. Phil
looks like a fucking idiot. They don't want the wool pole over their eyes. They should actually
get in contact with Ralph though. I would watch entire seasons of a TLC Ralph show. Ralph
a mania on TLC. Holy shit. You're right about that because the guy should just be a reality show.
on till you shit you're right about that because the guy should just be a reality show.
That's a brilliant idea. Should we produce this?
I want to produce that.
What if what if Ralph moved to Kenoga Park?
Oh, by the way, speaking of Centering John, he just tweeted recently.
He hasn't tweeted a lot about his life, but he just tweeted it as a full-time job.
That's why he's not podcasting.
And from what I've heard,
he has, you have bullied him off the internet.
Oh wow.
I'm not just me.
It wasn't just me, but.
Yeah, that's fair.
But from what I've heard,
he is a full-time school teacher now.
I don't know if he's like a substitute for a teacher is like out for a
year or if you actually got a real job at the school, but he's teaching kids algebra. That's his
new thing. I really like that. I'm celebrity anymore. Thanks. I heard he keeps up with the payments for his
I heard he keeps up payments for his realtor license. So that could also be something he's doing.
I don't know if that's like
No, that's like his license is lapsed. Yeah, his license has laps. Oh, okay. I'm
Why it's why he's trying to sell a shitty apartment. He's got a realtor try to help him do that
You know what I'm gonna play another voicemail for you because we just did an episode with Doug from whose right about
zooer than thou.
And if anyone was able to get through that, it was, it was, it was, it was
able to get through that. These people who host this show celebrate the fact that
they have sex with animals.
It's not good. Not a good thing. And surprisingly, as we're talking about this issue that happened
in France, and there was an animal rights group that was pushing the legislation to be
harder on people or everythings with animals, and this group of guys who all wanted to
fuck animals, like, hey, don't do that, you know? It turns out that legislation for legalizing
B.C.ality just went through in Spain.
Like, just this week.
Yeah, like, they made it so that you can have sex
with animals and as long as you don't like
damage their anuses of a jihad as you're fine.
Like, literally, that's the law.
It's like, if they don't have to go to the vet
and they're fine after it, you're good.
What?
Why?
Why is that okay?
I'm shocked by this.
Yeah.
You don't put rules in place, Carl.
The Spanish will run a muck.
Seriously.
Now I know I Germany invaded them and, oh wait,
that didn't happen.
So anyway, this is an interesting voice-mail that came over too.
And are you familiar with the young Turks?
Kaya,
you probably know these guys.
Political movements or the YouTube channel. I am. Yes. Yes. Yeah.
Hey Carl, this is Portchop sandwiches. So I just wanted to, you know, let me know that
this is part of the sandwiches. So I just wanted to let you know that
a big frowns janky weager from the young turts
apparently was advocating for fucking animals,
you know, if it was mutually contenting.
So just FYI, I wanna look at the melon.
All right, I will.
Let's check it out.
What the fuck is this guy saying?
Cause that's, I believe that I am going, if I were the rule,
the benevolent dictator of the world, I would legalize,
can I just say he's guilty? He's sh-
He looks guilty.
If I were the rule, the benevolent dictator of the world,
I would legalize peace shallity where you are giving.
You are you are pleasureing the
animal. You see what I'm saying?
This is the the veto defends right
here. Well, I can't got off. So
what's the problem? Okay, know
how you get a nose like that?
I was that kind of. I don't want
to say I don't like your channel taken down. But
you're mushing it into something. That's for sure. Okay. What, why, why did that happen?
It's the dumbest thing I've ever said. It really is the job of a thing you said.
No, I'll tell you why. I'll tell you why. Because like, so there's like, was the case that we covered
where there was like a guy or a girl or something that was pleasuring a horse and the horse came to a conclusion, right?
So who got harmed?
You know that people who are...
Forrest, why is he saying this?
What is happening right now?
What the fuck?
Okay, look, not to be a downer about what you're saying because what you're saying sounds
kind of funny, but a lot of people who are being raped, can I... at chicken up horses, hilarious, look at me rock, but I disagree with the province
sir.
I know you're going somewhere with it.
Yeah, let him cook sister as the kids say.
Yeah, actually like have an orgasm.
I know.
So like if a guy is being raped, he can have an orgasm. I know. So like if a guy is being raped, he can have an orgasm. He's like, I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can've we've already got into voicemails. Let's just let's just go Gary from San Diego
Oh, I'm Gary college of the show
Hey Carl Gary and San Diego
Well, I just checked John's Twitter and he got a new post on Sunday
He said that he's no longer going to be doing his podcast because catch this
He has a full time job.
That's right.
What could it possibly be?
Is he full time substitute teacher full time Uber driver?
Is he working at the home default?
It's kind of been under wraps if he's working.
It hasn't really leaked out as to what he's doing full time.
And even if he had a full time job,
could be podcast at night
like his buddy major Richard O'Hatta, O'Getta, I'm getting confused.
Anyway, let me know what you think.
Maybe one of your listeners can figure out what he's doing full time.
It hasn't leaked yet.
Okay, talk to you later.
I'm leaking it out for what I've heard.
He's teaching full time.
That's what he's up to right now, which is hilarious. I'm leaking it out for what I've heard. He's teaching full time.
That's what he's out doing now, which is hilarious.
I can't imagine.
He's a warm clock going off.
It's 6 a.m.
The first thing I thought of.
You know what I mean?
Like this is the guy who would do his noon show.
And you just put out his shirt.
He put it out backwards.
He's so dehydrated.
He's chucking orange juice.
I can't imagine what he's like.
Thank you.
You did that.
Do you think he strolls in the class?
He's got patches on his elbows.
Yeah.
He's the cool teacher.
Yeah.
I wonder if you bet.
So it makes a lot of sense to me, because you know,
like those tech talks that teachers will make
with zero self awareness about, oh, I make my students
pledge allegiance
to the gay flag. I bet John goes in there and talks about his trans kids and does all
the shit like I, I may be 67 fucking years old and an alcoholic, but I'm with you kids
comp sucks. And I guarantee he's bringing a bloatie sandwich with them. I guarantee he's packing
a lot
The cafeteria I'm gonna get kids getting enough energy
Maybe the kids leave baloney sanders on his desk
And of course the teacher's pet brings them a six pack.
Oh, we're gonna get a's this semester.
Karl Kuhn is over here.
All right, the great Seemuse called into the show.
Oh, great Seemuse here.
I just realized that I am in my break room and people could potentially hear me so I can't say
what I initially called for. However, that tongue-rool-like from whatever the hell podcast
is the most offensive sound you have ever played of this show. self. Call me back. I can throw it.
I can throw it.
I have to say, this is far less endearing
when I'm not in the potato filter.
Yeah, I would imagine.
You know, my friends hate it.
Who the fuck is that?
I have not brought this up, I don't think,
out of the show, but the entire video footage of the Dabby Awards ceremony,
which is over two hours long, is up on our Patreon.
If you're on our Patreon or Supercast,
you have access to the Dabby Awards,
and you know who watched it was my buddy Paco.
Yeah, it was so proud this is Paco.
I just wanna say thanks for putting the Dabby Awards up.
It looked awesome. Wish I couldn't have been there, but you know how it is.
You know what I'm saying? I wish it was good to watch it on the YouTube. Thank you for putting that out there for everybody. You know what I'm saying?
Yes, I know what you are saying. You don't have to be begging. If I go almost read that script perfectly,
a good job, honey.
Thank you for putting that out.
Yes, the debut award ceremony was fantastic.
And Chris was there.
I was there.
The list goes on.
People should award again.
I think Cardiff won the lifetime achievement,
but the life of Botanos was very short, so.
It's not that frustrating.
Well, they can't sprout and give new life to them.
That's true. Good boy.
We'll see.
All right.
We'll look on the bright side.
As I mentioned, we just did a bonus show with Huesi.
I did Huesi show with Gina Baskanti.
That was controversial. A lot of crazy things going on
and people want to weigh in on that
your car i have a listen to the uh...
the huesy episode yet but um...
i'm excited as a guy who just like
i hate huesy but i'm always like
fascinated by
like what dumb thing he's gonna say. I'm never ready for it. He has this like big
meadering build and I'm like gonna be stupid. And then it's stupider than I thought but I like it.
All right have a good one. I can't tell that person hates you as your loves up. It's hard to tell
on that one. That has to be the first voicemail that ends with have a good one. Yeah, that was pleasant.
It was rather pleasant.
Hey, you too, buddy.
Thanks for calling.
So, it's settling.
Thanks for calling the show, everybody.
All right, last voicemail I have,
Corn Cob, called it the show.
How do you feel about Corn Cob, Karna?
Yeah, he looks suspicious.
Corned for Corn Cob.
How do you feel about someone else?
This is Corn Cob.
Corned.
I think it's a different corn than corned Okay. I can be your uncle. You might be okay. Okay.
What's up, this corn cob?
You know, you say you wouldn't fuck a trans person, but let me be real. Like I had a fucking nephew who will show me like
girls dancing on TikTok and I'm like damn that girl kind of you know she
she was skinny and she looks nice you know she's cute or whatever and I look it up and
I'm like oh they use they then I'm pretty sure this is a man but I'm like damn though
they still got that ass and I will hit like just just push the bulbs out of the way out
of the way of what we can get it done. What's the same?
Carl I think you should be more open-minded about but fucking trans people
All right fair enough
Yeah, you don't have to convince us
They're gonna do that again. That's fine push the balls out of the way
Well, then there's the cock that's also
You don't have to do this like cope.
Like, I set no homeo before I went balls deep in this man.
All right, it's all good.
I think you did a realm of what I'm pretty
with this relationship.
There was a band here in Rochester.
I should find this song and play it.
It's not available anywhere, but I loved their album.
They were called the Dung Abedals.
And they had a song called Chick with a Dick.
And in the song, they say,
sucking the cock of a woman with nice tits
doesn't make you gay.
Okay.
For needs of grids, it's like,
I'm not not in my head of that one.
I'm not going along.
Yeah, and if you wear a condom,
you're not touching the other guy.
Yeah, that's right.
That's right.
As long as your balls don't slip together.
Yeah, watch the balls.
Oh boy.
So I want to thank you, Kai, for coming on the show.
I always love talking to you and I appreciate you coming on.
I had fun.
Thank you.
I did this a little earlier than usual,
because I thought you were in Germany.
What else did I know that you're actually
on the west coast of the US?
So we could have done this.
Sorry.
No, that's great.
I'm happy for you and your sham marriage
and your citizenship.
I think all that's going on.
Stop saying that.
I don't want this pulled up in court as evidence.
I'm going to fucking subpoena you and drag your ass
into court to say, to say on the record
that you were just joking.
I know this doesn't seem like it, but I want a comedy show.
I don't ask chance who I'm out of trust it.
It's comedy Johnson.
It's a joke.
Where's that story?
All right, Curative.
This fucking guy, he gets on one standup showcase.
And he thinks he's the fucking king of comedy over here
Anthony Kuvia open for me. Yeah
Holy shit, you're becoming a stuttering spud
We're in the bio anyway, Kay. Thank you so much for coming on the show
We're people find you and all the wonderful things that you're doing
show, where can people find you and all the wonderful things that you're doing?
Oh, Kaya or Son on Twitter.
And I have a discord. It's also on my Twitter.
That's about it. I apparently duck told you that we're planning to do a show together that's coming soon. If anybody gives a fuck.
So there's that, I suppose you guys did a show together before.
That was a, yeah, we both got bored of the concept. It wasn't working. Okay. We both kind of just peedered out, but I think we have a better idea now.
Oh,
I'm not gonna stop that show. We could reunite the P pod boys
coming back together that'd be fun
Between you and Doug who will feel more guilty about Anthony's suicide?
between you and Doug who will feel more guilty about Anthony suicide. Hmm, probably him.
Well, he's nice.
He did congratulate me on my marriage as well.
I have nothing against Anthony.
Well, he's very jealous.
I like him.
I have no comment.
All right.
Well, Kay, thanks so much for coming on.
And Cardiff, you do a show I guess.
All right.
See everybody. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Oh, alright, I'll play your stupid fucking bumper
Including Trump He's hot. He's out of control. That's what dance of potato over there. He loves his theme song.
It's good song.
It is a good song.
The first review is titled Romperoom.
W-A-T-P and friends, W-A-T-S, creep off, mud shark, all of them are such a pleasure
to watch. It's like a silly little romp through a world of screaming debauchery and purility.
I don't know what that means. These podcasts will make you laugh, cry, cringe, go deaf,
and become sterile all at the same time. I hate to love them and I love to hate them
Cheers cheers cheers sounds like a five star review there, Cardiff
Yes, but don't worry
Oh, we got more one more titled poor audio. Oh boy is the highlight
One more titled poor audio. Oh boy. Is the highlight?
These guys are way too inside baseball in crap that matters not
Not even good crap crap talkers
Listen shut up for a second is that a one sorry, Vio. Yes. Yes, it is inside baseball
Dario all right, is that it? Yeah, I'm sorry, Vio. Yes, yes it is. It's a day's fall. A derriere.
All right, is that it?
Yeah, I'm ending on a high note.
Boom!
Uh!
Uh!
Uh!
Uh!
Uh!
Oh, yeah, bye.
Okay, folks.
Guess what?
The episodes?
Oh, wow!
That was a great episode.
That was really great.
Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh was a great episode! That was really great! Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I really think I can't help it every time he hears that drop he has to sing along with
the Pavlov's potato
Read the one star review just start that I wish I would have known about this with kind of was hanging out over here
Come on weeks ago. We're gonna play this in the so now. It's Sarlor, Ganes.
He's like a spray bottle on a cast. Yeah, right. He's just curled up at the corner.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh, yeah, bye.
Jesus, I gotta go.
This is getting stupid.
Bye guys.