Who Are These Podcasts? - Ep430 - BunnyRanch Podcast
Episode Date: July 23, 2023This week it’s sexy time on WATP as we check out a podcast that interviews prostitutes. It’s basically an advertisement for the different ladies you can get with at various brothels in Nevada. So ...guys, if you like old, fat, ugly women who have sex multiple times per day, good news - you have many options. Doug from Who’s Right joins the show to try to keep it in his pants as we watch an overweight grandmother belly dance. Then we briefly discuss the Ray DeVito fallout from his recent appearance, Howard Stern has a dinner party and decides to make it a show, Patty Pukewater has a new YouTube channel that’s very scary, Stuttering John tries to be Howard Stern, and someone is really good at catching a dabbler. https://whosrightpodcast.com/ Tickets to the Magic Bag on 9/15 – http://watplive.com/ Support us, get bonus episodes, Vic and Hannah pics, and watch live every Saturday and most Wednesdays: http://bit.ly/watp-patreon https://watp.supercast.tech/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Here a fat bunny.
It's going down, going down, at the right, going down, man!
Epishoed.
430.
Are you a boner guy?
Oh, I was a boner guy.
What a dick!
You know what I miss penis?
What are you talking about?
I'm the one who should apologize.
Cause...
Cause a roo.
Cause a roo.
Slapperoonie.
It's show time. W-A-A-T-P-W-A-T-P.
Hello, everyone.
It's a cousin of yours.
Welcome to another episode of Who Are These Podcasts.
The only show you need for your spank bank, I'm your host, Carl, with me today.
He's been called Mean Doug. He's been called Mean Doug.
He's been called Fat Doug.
He's been called Ugly Doug.
From the Who's Right Podcast, it's Mean Fat Ugly Doug.
That's up, buddy.
Where'd he go?
Yeah, it's great to be here, I guess.
Is that what I'm supposed to say?
Please go to whoarethese.com,
or email address, voice about never-releaked or I subreddit. Leave your email address, voice about it, or link to our subreddit,
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Patreon and Supercast featuring two exclusive bonus episodes every single month.
And you can watch these shows live when we record them on Saturdays and two, Wednesdays
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We just did the debut, the pilot episode of Who Are These Broadcasters, Christian Blatt
and myself.
We did that yesterday and our Patreon.
Also, our YouTube memberships as well.
YouTube members get all this exclusive content.
So you can always hit the join button on our YouTube page
or sign up on Patreon or supercast links
on whoarethese.com.
For that, tickets are on sale for the Magic Bag,
Friday, September 15th, whtplive.com for tickets.
Oh, this is the other thing.
If you're going to websites for me
and I do appreciate that you do that,
go to thecreepoff.com and vote for Carl because the score right now is four to four. So we got a big
Monday coming up. I think Brian Johnson is going to be there with us. We'll be spinning. We
will be spinning. We'll be spinning. We all might be many wheels being spun. I don't know.
But if you can help me out, go to thecreepoff.com and vote for Carl. I would really appreciate that.
We also encourage our listeners. Go ahead and give us a five-star review on Apple Podcast or
over you review podcasts and then
should all over us in the comments section. But the five stars is the important
thing. That's what helps the algorithm, so I'm told by other podcasters.
Today, we'll be reviewing a show called Bunny Ranch Podcast. This was a
suggestion from Doug, but I think you saw it somewhere, right, Doug?
Yeah, I got it out of your discord. Okay, so do you know who suggested that?
You know, I want to give credit. Yeah, I got it out of your discord. All right, Randall. who suggested that? You know, I wanna give credit. Yeah, I got it out of your discord.
All right, Randall, all right, fair enough.
We have both listened separately.
We've not discussed it with you beforehand.
Let's get into it.
This show hosted by James, AKA James Extreme.
That's his Twitter handle anyway.
So, yeah, he looks pretty extreme.
He's pretty extreme.
Doug, if you don't mind, I have video clips.
You have audio.
I'm gonna get started so people can get a visual
understanding what we're looking at here.
It's a talk show, it's an interview style show.
You have your host sitting across from the interviewee,
and in this case, our interviewee
happens to be this wonderful woman, Olivia Bentley,
and she's gonna introduce herself to all of us.
So, Olivia, for all the people listening and watching right now, who are you? Tell us a little about yourself.
So I am Olivia Bentley at the Moonlight Bunny Ranch. I've been here for years.
I actually live in Idaho. So I'm bored and raised in Idaho. I like outdoor sports. I'm a mom. I'm huge on family. So when I'm not here, I'm getting into domestic life at home in Idaho.
And I also own property in Costa Rica. I like to go there.
What's to like? This is or off to a bad start because what this is is a show with prostitutes, sex
workers, what's the right term for this dog?
Org.
Oh, okay, thank you.
I was curious about that.
Actually, I learned a new one.
Did you know what they're called courtesans?
I did.
I didn't know what it meant.
I looked it up and yes, it means horror.
Correct.
So, there's a lot of words that we could use to describe this.
And what this guy does, does James is he's kind of
Advertising the women that you can go meet at these brothels that are legal in Nevada. And so this guy's a dork
From what I've seen all he's doing is ensuring that nobody's going to want to fuck this girl or the one that I watch
Yes, correct and he's so awkward talking to these women.
You'd think you'd be good at this by now.
We're really going on there too,
because you were nominated.
So I want to congratulate you on that,
because it's not your first time getting nominated
for Nevada's courtesan of the year
and being induced into the Hall of Fame.
Induced.
Are you a doctor? I think you're a doctor in the Hall of Fame. Induced. Are you a duck?
I think you're a duck to the Hall of Fame.
Not, dude.
He seems scared.
I think he lost a bat.
Guys, don't make me talk to girls.
I have to say, if I'm going to a brothel
and I have the choice between a Hall of Famer
and Rookie of the Year,
yeah, Hall of Fame is not good for this.
You know, lifetime achievement awards is not something I'm excited about.
Most improved.
Okay, that would be interesting.
I like to.
So he asked that question at the beginning of every episode.
Who are you?
And she went into this long thing about owning property or whatever.
And she's been doing this for a long time.
She could have just said, I am dead inside.
That's all she had to say.
Yeah.
And also the fact that you're a mother
and you love your family, leave all of that out of it.
We don't need to know any of that stuff.
Yeah.
One more, and then I'll let you show us
what you were checking out.
This is, she's very excited about this nomination
to enter into the Hall of Fame.
And this is coming from the LPI and Awards,
which I went on their website, I went on Google,
I could not figure out what that stands for.
But they're formally the CWMC awards.
Don't know what that means either.
But what they do is they recognize and honor Cordesons and brothels since 1997.
So it's an important organization, whatever it is.
Sure, obviously.
And so she's very excited about this.
So that's a huge nomination right there.
For especially for the Nevada's legal sex work.
Thank you so much. Congrats.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
It's always, I'm always so grateful to be recognized as good pussy.
What's the, how do you judge this?
Yeah, that's how do I become a judge for this? This is I guess my question.
That's what I want to know.
All right, Doug, you checked out a different episode, I believe.
It's a lot like obscenity, you know, I can't give you the definition,
but I know it when I see it.
Yeah, right.
Like pornography, yeah.
All right, what did you pick up on here, buddy?
Starting off with the way he interviews guests, my clip number two is him going into
that same who are you think? But welcome back with the buddy ranch podcast. I'm James and this
week from Kit Kat Ranch. We have the fabulous Molly. Either James, thank you for having me. Yeah.
Somali, tell us a little about yours. Like, how? Who are you? It's the first question, be ready for it.
How about a hobbit of, it's so nervous.
What I like about it is he knows that people don't like
the question, my clip three shows him telling people,
or saying that he knows that it's a bad question.
All right, I mean, that's the coveted question,
right, that I've done it all the time, is who are you
and everyone hates the question, because I hate even say who are like sometimes because
put on a spot but it's a lot okay so he knows it sucks okay so he
knows the sucks but he doesn't know what words mean right he
doesn't know what words mean obviously he goes I don't like asking
this question people don't like answering it the listeners hate it so
anyway go ahead what do you are you doing? Now you go. Now you go.
Jesus Christ. Where do you learn how to improve his show from Opie? So the beauty of it, the girl that
or woman or whatever that is on my episode, Molly Blingwall. So now number four is her giving her
answer to who are you? Okay. Hi, I'm Molly Blingwell, and I'm working
at the Kit Kat Ranch right now.
I'm from Oregon, and I'm a whole grown-ass woman.
I am living my best life.
Nobody that ever says I'm living my best life
is living their best life.
They're living in a trailer somewhere
in the desert,
selling their pussy for 15 bucks,
or whatever the fuck it is you're doing.
They're gonna get a cut of whatever
they're selling their pussy for.
Right.
And the fact that she starts off by saying,
I'm a grown-ass woman,
it's like she's talking to her parents or her mom
or something.
Molly, you get in here.
What do you think you're doing?
I'm a grown-ass woman.
Tell me what to do.
I'm gonna be my best life. Jesus, no, what's accusing you of anything here, what do you think your Jewish? I'm a grown-ass woman. Tell me what to do. I'm living my best life. Jesus, no, what's accusing you of anything here, Molly?
So we're bled, sir. Well, it's funny you say that because the host thought it was the greatest
answer he's ever heard of that question. Number five. Oh, no, that's the greatest thing right there.
I'm a whole grown-ass woman. I love that. Here I am.
Yep. I wasn't expecting that. That's good. I'm here for it.
Fuck an amazing. Wow. James is easily impressed. Seriously. You know, I can't imagine I would ask someone,
tell me a little bit about yourself or who are you?
And their answer, I'd be like,
I'm subordinate away.
I don't know how to recover from this.
No, not what I like to.
I wasn't ready for that at all.
Nobody's ever had a response to that question.
I don't know where to go from here.
Oh God, James is terrible at this.
Can I ask you a question?
Because you sent me over a photo of a woman.
Yeah, is that who we're talking to right now? Yes. Do you mind if I just bring that up terrible at this. Can I ask you a question? Because you sent me over a photo of a woman. Yeah.
Is that who we're talking to right now? Yes. Do you mind if I just bring that up for the people
who are watching? And we can always describe this too. You call this, this file is called GrossHor.Ping.
Oh, yeah. She's got pink hair. Oh, God, it's not a good look in any single way.
The bangs, I'm not digging the bangs.
I'm not digging the butterfly tattoo.
The dog collar checks out.
Yeah, that does check out.
She's a grown man.
There really isn't anything in that picture
that is good.
No, not even the stupid fucking horror lights hanging in the back by the mirror. Nothing, there's nothing about it that's good. No. Not even the stupid fucking horror lights hanging in the back by the mirror.
Nothing. There's nothing about it that's good. I wouldn't need her to pay me.
This would be a weird transition from the two of us. Crying the whole time. Okay. So let's get back
to Olivia Bentley. And she's amazing because she has recently made the transition to porn. I know.
So I've been in the sex industry for quite a while.
I'm very seasoned at sex.
So this last year, I decided to take myself out of my comfort zone and get on camera.
And it has been really fun and it's been creative and it's been keeping me occupied.
Wow. So that's impressive. She went from a woman who was having sex with guys for money
without a camera to a girl who has sex with guys for money in front of a camera. That's
way out of her comfort zone. Very impressive stuff. How'd she come up with that? She
had like a consultant or a life coach or something.
I've come up with that.
I always wait for a lot of time to go by when you're in this line of work.
Oh yeah.
You want to get into pornography in your late 30s, early 40s.
So we all know it's always a good time.
All right.
Let's find out.
Was that Bo Jackson that went from football to baseball?
Yeah.
Along the same lines as what she's doing?
Nope.
Just wildly different activities. I mean, you're not along the same lines as what she's doing. Um, nope. Just wildly different activities.
I mean, they're both seasoned, but.
So I went ahead and signed on with 1215 production company.
Okay. Um, and that is my camera.
My camera, he is one AVN awards for the biggest like monstrous cock.
So I will be working with him.
All right, that's not a good advertisement
for guys who wanna hook up with you at the bunny wrench.
So I'm getting pegged by a BBC on a daily basis now.
And if you guys wanna throw a hot dog on a hallway,
here's my email address.
There was a seriously good chance
that I'm not going to feel you, but I will still charge you regular price
I
Will still moan as if I'm interested in anything that's going on while you're here in the room with me
All right now the next segment he does on this show and you tell me if there's the same with your episode
Is he reads their reviews that people leave for them? Did you get that dude? He didn't do that in mine.
Okay, but I would assume that the one
that I watched didn't have any reviews.
Good point.
You seen the picture.
Yeah, good point.
Okay, yeah.
So this is like a bad edit.
There's definitely a lot of editing going on in this show.
I can tell he's not comfortable.
He's very awkward.
He probably says a lot of dumb things
and goes, hold on a second.
Let me do that again.
So you can see the bad edit, but then he gets into the reviews section.
So that's a really cool thing right there. We do have a few reviews. If you don't mind,
we pulled up a few of the reviews you have. And I just want to read a couple of them and then get your kind of take on,
you know, kind of what,
what it what it means. I mean, some of them are straightforward, but it's a take.
Also get like, you know, the real story of it.
Okay.
So,
so smooth, isn't it?
Holy shit, you can use a lot fewer words.
All right, let's read some of the reviews people laugh for ya.
You're very popular, Gail.
Let's check it out.
All right, so let's get into it because these reviews,
if you think this guy is a loser, wait till you hear the people who are leaving reviews, it's one thing and
I have no problem with this. I don't want to come across as like, oh, you're a loser
if you have to pay for sex, we all have to pay for sex and we're wearing the other. So
I'm not against that in any single way. What I am against is you fantasizing that the
girl that you pay to fuck you as your girlfriend and then writing glowing reviews about her on a website somewhere
That's where you're kind of in real-dalt territory. Yeah, you're still thinking about it. Yeah, that that's not that's where you're losing as my point
So black Hawk is the first review of this guy black. Oh
It goes
this is from
This is from...
One of your regulars, it looks like. So, I have partied with many times with Olivia,
and I can tell you that it's not the same old, same old.
Olivia can and will fulfill the party of your choice.
Youthful, smart, caring, and adventurous is how I think of Olivia.
The most fun party was an out date in Lake Tahoe, where we enjoyed all Tahoe has to offer.
Whatever the party you decide, you won't go wrong.
And it's Blackhawk a five year party regular.
So it looks like a 48 and a 72 hour party. Oh, dates. Yeah.
So Black Hawk is a very special gentleman. Okay. That's not everything you need to know.
This loser Black Hawk. Also, it's odd to me that he's talking about how we've been together for
five years now. We party. We have these long weekends together. Why does he want to share her with everyone else?
Like that's the last thing I would do is give a positive review.
I get positive reviews to restress and I want them to last for a long time.
I enjoy them.
But I looked at it from a different point of view.
If I ever find myself getting ready to walk into the bunny ranch and I'm what I'm going
to do is look for reviews.
I'm going to look for the reviews of all the girls.
Okay. And anybody who's left a review
that has black anything in their name,
they're out of the room.
Yeah, that's also a problem.
I see what you're saying, they're dying.
Here's another one.
I love the terminology they use.
Oh, yeah, we are partying.
You mean she gave you a dry hand job
at the hotel that you paid 500 bucks a night for?
All right, that's a cool part of dude. So then it goes on to another one and
This one so that one was like five years. They've been dating this one's nine years
They've been that they've been dating so Olivia's awesome. I've been seeing her for over nine years
She is always amazing a beautiful smile and a mesmerizing laugh.
She always aims to please a truly classy woman.
That's my goal.
He did our brothel crawl.
Yeah, nine years.
That's another gentleman that those nuances of feeling kind
of like a married couple at times, like in a fun way, like the comedic stuff, you know,
like the jokes and stuff, because we know each other so well. And my part is a wonderful
man too. I want to get together with a whore and tell jokes. Work out my material. You want to watch my podcast with me?
What the fuck?
So again, you can see how this woman feels about these guys who obviously are forming
attachments to her.
And she's like, oh, yeah, that's another pretty special guy.
He's my special little guy.
We're like a married couple.
And then she immediately is like, oh, I mean,
but you know, the fun way.
No one's ever said the fun.
Yeah, the fun way of being a married couple.
You guys can relate, right?
No, I'm not sure what you mean by that.
So those are the, that's the review section
of the podcast.
What do they do on your show, Doug?
Well, first thing I want to do is go back.
I checked out her profile, Molly Blingwald, on their website.
So when he said, who are you?
She could have went through any number of these things.
And it would have made more sense than what she ended up saying.
But so three words that describe me, she said, curvy outgoing and open-minded.
I think she meant bad obnoxious and stupid.
Yeah.
Miss miss miss.
All right.
She said she's a belly dancer.
We'll get into that in a little bit.
She said she's pansexual.
She says I love role-playing, except it's R-O-L-L.
So I think she's like biscuits.
Yeah.
And then her specialties are girlfriend experience, porn star experience,
virgins, couples, two girl parties, out dates, handicapped and disability people,
roleplay again with biscuits, and then fetish BDSM, domination and more.
Okay. That's everything.
Yeah, that's pretty much everything.
Well, virgins right there.
beggars can't be choosers, I guess.
Yeah. When you specialize iners, I guess. Yeah.
When you specialize in everything, you specialize in nothing.
I just want to point that out.
In the interview, so where we left off is she was just getting ready to get into who
she is and everything, my number six.
Get ready to hit pause.
You'll know when.
All right.
Well, Molly, what do you like to do for fun?
What did Molly say next? Here are your choices.
First, anal. Secondly, watching my great granddaughter. Thirdly, crocheting.
crocheting. Horthley, big black talk.
Fifthly, watching old Kung Fu movies.
Three.
Okay, that's interesting.
I'm gonna go with Fifthly.
I'm gonna go with Kung Fu movies.
That's the only one that's zagged.
Crocheting.
You think Crocheting?
Yeah.
You didn't think Crocheting's egg? I thought it'd be a pizza zanger with that. crocheting's egg that's a pretty good
one two one I do enjoy watching Kung Fu movie yeah I want for what today I do like your
choices there that was funny I didn't I didn't pick the or I didn't pull the conversation where they were naming off every kung fu movie that's ever been made.
But if you're curious, go back and listen to the episode.
Why would they do that? Try to be sexy time over here. Let's talk about kung fu for too much.
I'm not gonna cook food for too much.
Okay, and then when she, they got done with their kung fu conversation,
then he was trying to get something else out of her number seven.
What else though?
I do like to belly dance.
I kind of professional belly dancer for quite a long time.
It's out there.
There's one I wanna like demonstrate like a couple seconds
of a secret moly move.
I could do that. Yeah, let's see real quick. What's a professional belly dancer? Is there a
Some sanctioned league I don't know about. Okay, so yes, the first clip that I sent you belly dance one. Yeah, we'll show you what a professional belly dancer is not
Secret moly move. I could do that. Yeah, let's see real quick camera should up. Yeah. Yeah, we'll just see your belly at this point
But it's fine. That's all you can see
Okay
Interesting
No, she made that way. She made towards that
There you go. All right
In that photo offer, I thought she was just ugly. I didn't realize she was also this fat.
Yeah, she didn't look that fat.
I don't know.
You know, she said something earlier that she works
at the KitKat Ranch.
Yeah.
I think she works at the King size Reese's Peanut Butter Cup
Ranch.
KitKat Factory.
So the other thing, I sent you another clip,
belly dance, too.
Yeah, I'll play that air.
So all that is is a zoomed in of his face while she's dancing.
All right.
Okay.
It's a tear.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
When it girls being sexy, they always want to hear you say, interesting.
hilarious.
No, no, he worse than that.
And you guys already picked up on it is do that away from me.
Don't point your gut at me.
He was literally looking away.
You know, you ask a dumb question.
Yeah, you get a dumb answer, I guess, is how that works.
Well, speaking of disgusting, I want to talk about how our friend Olivia, who's, I would
say up there in age, she's
a, she's also a squirter.
Oh, yeah, I thought you'd get excited about that.
The coconut rub down, neuro style, to start was amazing.
We're going to have to touch on that one.
Followed up with even better finish.
What agatus?
She even squirted for me.
What a girl or what a good girl, sorry.
So this is part of the review
that she even squirted what a good girl.
And so he's got some follow up questions
about what she does when she's squirting.
So squirt her.
I'm a squirt her.
Yeah, yeah.
I squirt, I can squirt on you in 69.
That's very, very popular. Super hot. I can squirt on you in 69. That's very, very popular.
Super hot, I can squirt on you 10 ways next Sunday.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! The last thing I'm thinking is, I really hope she squirts on my face. I hope she pisses on my face today.
No, the bus bar is how she found out the guys were really into squirting.
I would not have guessed it a million years.
And I didn't realize how popular squirting was until I did a 25% off my squirting parties.
It is super popular. There is a squirt group.
25% of squirting.
I changed the sense of the straight face.
I feel I did not see that comment.
Did you want to give out the promo code for 40?
W-A-T-P.
Squirt. This one is insane. So did you want to give out the promo code for printing? Yeah, W-A-T-P. It's court.
This woman's insane.
All right, so now we have another loser who
writes a review for her.
I had the incredible honor of spending a weekend
with Olivia in Lake Tau.
And we had a wonderful time together.
Olivia is, by far, the classiest woman I have ever spent time with.
And more importantly, as we come, a great friend of the last couple years. She doesn't just want to
spend time with you, but truly wants to get to know you and build a personal relationship with you.
She made me feel like the luckiest man in the world. I was truly honored
She made me feel like the luckiest man in the world. I was truly honored
To have this time together and cannot wait until the next visit
Another guy's my girlfriend and makes her in a real relationship
It is so pathetic the next review was
Olivia's pussy stunk something fierce, what a whore bag. That was a lot.
They're all reposted.
Fortunately, I was hoping that something funny
would come up, but all of these guys are just
pathetic losers.
Who are like, oh yeah, she asked me about my family.
We have long walks in the fucking beach.
Like, what?
Listen to this guy read reviews, so he can't read.
He can't talk.
He can't ask questions. It's like they just grabbed the maintenance man from the bunny ranch and said,
here's a camera. Yeah. I know. He seems like a virgin. He's giving off virgin vibes.
The way he's talking to these girls. This is not and 22 would be a much better on this show.
I think that this guy, maybe that's the problem I'm having. All right, Doug, back to you, buddy.
We will skip eight.
Go to number nine.
This is the way I described it is the stupid slut explaining where she's from.
Yeah, I have, I am Romani.
So it is like in my culture, the belly dancing.
Say it again, Romani.
What is that?
Gypsy.
Okay.
Yeah.
Romani. I hadn't heard that. Yeah, I mean,
it's like the word gypsy itself is kind of a... Yeah, so I've tried to be a little bit more modern,
but yeah, technically we're from India, not even like Romania or anything like that.
Where the people came from. Okay. We've just walked our way across the world in a beautiful fashion, entertaining everyone as we go.
And here we are.
That's all it says.
Yep.
She's Romanian from India.
Right, yeah.
One of those type of Indians.
I also love that she goes, like, and I can use the word gypsy.
But if anyone else, you know, it's very effective.
The G word.
Yeah. So I throw the G word around here. But if anyone else uses it, it's very effective. The G word. Yeah, since I throw the G word around here,
this girl might be retarded, Doc.
I don't think there's might.
I think there's, she succeeds.
Okay.
Very good.
Number 10 is her talking about when her parents tried killing her.
What is the best set up to a clip up her?
Let's see. And you've been up to Tahoe at all?
Oh yeah, I used to live here when I was really little.
Okay.
So I learned how to swim in Tahoe.
They're like, swim.
Jesus Christ, I can't hold onto this brick.
But you're off the left.
So I know that you would assume that somebody gets into this position
in life because their dad fingered them or something. But number 12 is her explaining
how she got into this lifestyle. So what brought you into this industry and then what brought
you to here? Okay. Well, back in the day before I was a Pulwant sex worker and stuff,
I used to work for UPS.
You know, honestly, it was a really dirty job,
and I got a lot of bruises and stuff,
and it was very hard work,
and you know, it wasn't great for my body, honestly.
So, my oldest daughter, who is now 30,
she's like, hey mom, you know what I'm doing
that I think you would love.
What?
What?
Come on.
Her oldest daughter is 30 and also a courtesan apparently.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Yeah, I didn't see that one coming back.
You got me with that one, oh shit.
Each was.
Yeah, be the delivery person's hard work.
I know all about it.
Yeah, really bad on the body.
Yeah, I wonder if Chuck or Andy's also going to transition
if they're not screw here.
What do you think that does?
Like the UPS employee engagement metrics,
when they're saying, look, this girl takes loads on the face and she
does that over handling these packages.
We want more money.
Right.
Yeah.
That would be part of the negotiations.
This woman would rather fuck virgins than deliver packaging for your company.
Do you understand?
This is not good.
These work conditions are not good.
Can we just get air conditioning in the truck?
That's all we're asking.
Okay. The next part of this interview with with my girl Olivia is they go through her menu.
Now I have not been to a brothel. I assume Doug has many times.
Apparently they hand you a menu when you come in and you choose what you would like to enjoy.
Is that right, Doug? Yes, absolutely.
Okay. Yes, yeah, this guy gets it.
I love it because some of these things are named
in a clever manner.
Other things are not.
But either way, James is just like explain this to me.
He's confused about it.
Sex.
Try the map.
We will jump right in it.
So you have an appetite.
So this is right here. You guys won't really see the image very well, but
See it later. Don't worry. So appetizers. So strip teas and lap dance. So that
Some people know what that is, but
Some people might know what that is
Could you dumb it down and shake? Yeah, only some people know what that is. What did he ask? Could you dumb it down and shake?
Yeah, only some people know what that means.
All right, so then there are ones where it's like, okay, I don't know what that means, so I'm glad that she's explaining it.
The Milky Way Massage.
Milky Way Massage.
So that is my hand job.
Okay.
And I'm preferable to that coconut oil, like I mentioned.
So that's just a really fantastic, wonderful hand job.
Okay.
Do you have a special brand that you use on the coconut oil?
Or is it your secret that way no one knows the brand?
I mean, because some people do, I just want to make sure.
When I'm cooking, it's extra virgin and it's organic.
Yeah. When it
sex is just like that's just organic. What kind of follow up question? What brand do you think it's
coconut oil? What do you mean what brand do I use? Oh boy. Okay. This is a floodwad. This is also, because I got from her appetizer, met you.
The next one is called such a talented mouth.
Such a talented mouth.
Did you get any guess what that one might be?
Like,
ha ha ha.
Did you see his face when he said it?
It was like it made him uncomfortable.
Like, I think he's gay.
I think that's what it is.
Well, actually what it is is such a talented mouth is
where she tells you all about her children,
and her children's accomplishments.
Goes into a couple songs.
Yeah, that's her, just like, okay,
this mouth is too much for me.
So, no, that's actually a blowjob.
She does deep throat.
And then this next item I thought was a little bit odd.
Again, the name of it's pretty descriptive.
So I think we gotta get it, but he doesn't.
So with talented mouths, you're getting deep throat.
Okay.
You're getting deep throat.
So sloppy face fuck.
That one is really, really, really popular.
That's probably the most popular thing on my appetizers
and sloppy facewalk is just what it sounds like.
It's just a wet, sloppy, filthy blowjob.
Okay.
Okay.
And explain sloppy facewalk more for me please.
What does that tell?
So I see here that you offer shit and you're pussy and eat it out. What exactly is that?
Oh my gosh, she has this other thing. I forget what it's called a 50 50 or something and that includes a blowjob and
sex
But then she specifies she goes, but if I'm gonna do that, like you gotta go down on me too.
It's like, what? What are we dating? No, definitely not, that's ridiculous.
So then she talks about the get your freak out. I don't know if you know this or not, but you're a whore.
You've had a lot of dicks in your pussy.
Today, yeah, right earlier.
All right, this is the get Your Freak on menu item.
Get your Freak on.
Get your Freak on.
So that is my fetish choice on the menu, and that could be a variety of things.
So fetish wise, I can cater to feet.
I come to anal. So people ask me about that.
Remain role play, hegging. Oh, okay. You know, anything that's a little bit more off the cuff
and fetish. Yeah. She might off the cuff. Yeah, she's also an improv comic. Yes, you know what?
You may off the cuff. Yeah, she's also an improv comic.
Yes, you know what?
Cause I'm feeling weird today, let's do some pegging.
You know, I'm just, I'm just talking to my mind, I'm picking.
Maybe you fucked me in the ass of the dildo.
I don't know, let's see what that looks like.
That's not a great menu item if it means anything.
Yeah, what does that mean?
Everything else, though.
What's this poo poo platter?
All right, this is my favorite thing.
This is what I'm gonna wrap up on because if you wanna talk about these clients she has
who are pathetic.
This has to be the most pathetic thing I could possibly even imagine.
This is an opportunity for me to get to know you as a person.
So like the guy that really loves golfing, that will take me golfing with him and I'm
that type of thing. She has clients will take me golfing with him. And I'm, you know, that type of thing.
She has clients who take her golf thing with them. Yeah.
I'm into hand holding.
We can go watch a movie together.
What the fuck?
Meet my kids.
Oh, man, that's that one.
I'm just like, really, you don't have a friend to go golfing with.
You gotta bring a whore.
That's, that's bizarre.
All right, Doug, finish us off here, buddy.
I've only got a couple more.
Sorry, um, then we'll go golfing.
Um, so number 13, this is, is going back to where she had given her origin story.
Now she touches a little bit about her dad and I'm guessing he probably actually did finger, but that's a real irrelevant.
Okay.
Yeah, and I always knew about brothels.
Like I said, I grew up little in Nevada and my dad lost his virginity at one of the brothels.
Okay.
You know, my grandpa took him there.
So it's just like it's always been known that that's one of those things that happened. How does that story come up?
Why does she know that?
They're a proud family.
I guess so.
I bet they're very, very close.
I don't know about any of my parents' previous partners at all.
It's just a conversation that's never come up with my family.
That's a really odd thing to be talking about. But I say mom.
Can you tell us the story again about when grandpa took dad
to the warehouse?
All right, gather around.
Aren't you kids tired of the story?
The dead like hand jobs.
And if so, what brand was the coconut oil?
Big debate. Yeah. So I don't know how long your episode was. I think mine was a half hour roughly. Yeah,
that's just a few minutes. Yeah, number 11 is about 16 minutes
into the episode. This will launch on Cinco de Mayo, which is
tomorrow. But it is National Star Wars
Day, our international star wars, say my bad.
Very cool.
Very cool.
But I mean, you know, it's a little bit rainy and right now.
But, you know, we're going to go back to like the 70s, the 80 degree weather, and it's
going to keep going from there.
So we're finally out of that cold snow.
What?
What's the fuck just happened?
What is it?
Go back to the 70s.
I thought he meant 77 when Star Wars came out.
Right.
So he just brought up at Star Wars Day,
and he took him on the weather?
Yeah.
Tomorrow will be partly cloudy.
What the fuck is wrong with this guy?
All right.
I want to do him as a co-host at WOTV.
This guy's amazing.
That's all I have for my episode.
Okay.
I think that's enough for both of us then.
I want to talk about a little bit real quick.
The Rey De Vito fallout from the episode that we did
where we picked on Rey's podcast.
Will you stand back the fuck out of it?
Oh, that one?
That's the one.
Very good.
So, my buddy Kevin Brennan watched that video on YouTube.
And he actually, I've never seen him do this before.
He played it on MLC yesterday, because he wanted to play for Bob.
It was just him and Bob doing the show.
And he pulls out his voice like, all right, listen to this.
And he pulls up the part where Liam tells the story about, yeah, I remember we went to
that comedy club and that girl wanted you to drive her home
and you were like, nah, I'm gonna go inside
and keep drinking and it came, it came, it just looks a bob
and it goes, this guy can't be fixed, Bob. Ha ha ha ha ha ha any little content or anything. He's just going on there and just telling a story about a time
he was hanging out with Ray and Ray was afraid of pussy.
So funny.
Some of the comments underneath the video we put up where Ray is
on there with us and we're watching,
Centering John.
This, this commenter wrote,
Ray's awesome top, or the Chris's hypocrite,
just repeating what Chris said two seconds earlier.
Then he does the exact same thing and he's putting it into the time codes.
He does the exact same thing at 355.
Then the guy goes back and edit it as he's still watching.
He goes 10.
Oh, seven.
He did it again.
3257.
And again, 32 and again, 4320 again.
What the fuck is wrong with Ray Davino?
He just kept repeating your lines over and over again.
I know, but I already felt bad for the guy. I wasn't going to bring it up. He wouldn't even look at Lucy's boobs.
Come on. So funny. But I did want to report to you as I was watching Mr. Loves Company yesterday.
And Kevin was talking about watching that episode of us, ambushing Ray. He said that Chris is
very funny. He'd love to get you on MLC.
So I think you have an open invitation.
That's very nice.
If you ever want to go on there, I don't sell tickets, but you might.
Is it truly an ambush because I think in the previous episode, you said you were going
to have Ray on to review Ray's show?
Correct.
And the person for not listening.
Right.
The first thing you didn't know after we were doing was Ray. And people
like to act like Ray was acting when he's like, Oh, come on.
I think no, he never asked me. He literally never even asked me
what we're doing. No, he just came on. It's like, do you know what
this show is? Could you imagine to show me like, I wouldn't be
talking about today. That's not what this show is. I think I
did that once early on. I don't think so.
But either.
I mean, you could show up without clips.
You're busy or something, but, okay,
Shoei did that to me once.
No, I think, but I definitely did that to me one time,
because I said I'm the show we were gonna do,
and he comes down and I said,
did you listen to this?
And he goes, nope, but I'm looking forward to hearing it now.
Okay.
Fair enough.
Let's do it. It turned out to be a really obnoxious
podcast. So it ended up working out. Well, I think that was the rain down rant cast. I
believe was the one that Shule came on that really annoying girl and that guy was really
drunk and just screaming, drinking some bells. Yeah. That was that was an interesting one.
All right. Doug, I don't I don't know what else you have to get into today, but I forgot to tell you,
I do have a heart out as soon as GenoBisConte shows up.
We all do.
No, actually, I have a fun treat for us today.
I know you've heard the news, but Howard Stern was the
summer off, decided to go live on his channel Sunday night
and broadcast a show from his house
and he's live on serious xm Howard 100 and
This is how this sounded you guys are gonna get real excited about this
Okay, how are you Ron? All right. Hey everybody. This is I'm trying something new for people who are listening now
I'm breaking into my own channel
I'm on what?
Talk about your summer.
Well, yeah, okay, but I'm explaining the people what's happening, honey.
What is happening right now, people are doing you live.
People are hearing me live.
Hi, everyone.
What the fuck is wrong with bath?
The guy is stupid fucking blah, blah, blah, blah.
He said four words, and she was like, talk about your summer.
Make it about me.
Yeah, I think Howard knows how to do his show.
Jesus.
And I love that he acts like this is such a crazy thing. He's like, I'm actually broadcasting from my house. Yeah,
Howard, you've been doing that for three years now. That's surprising. That he was live.
Hi, everybody. I'm here with Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon in my wife, Beth.
And did I say this is a Howard Stern takeover of Howard Stern Radio?
That's right. And what I did was I obviously can't get along with that in audience all summer.
I thought it'd be fun.
I was sitting and playing music and I thought we would play music.
I would go back to my roots of being a DJ.
And who's gonna draw you gonna start this off?
But I have a bunch of people over Jimmy Fallon wants to say something.
Hi everybody, I get this is honestly unprecedented. I didn't know if you were being serious or
not being serious. You're talking about doing this. I go, I think it's a great idea and
you're like, we're doing it now. We actually are doing it now. It's actually going out.
This is on the air live. So Jimmy Fallon is actually like this is 2003 and Howard Stern
matters to anyone. And he's like, I can't fucking believe this right now.
Howard Stern, you're on the radio right now and you're gonna play music?
Holy shit, I can't believe I'm here.
Can someone pinch me please?
It's a calm down, buddy.
And he gets way worse than that.
So, here's the format of the show, dog.
You're gonna get excited.
Howard's got all these cool people over to his house.
And they're all gonna pick a song to play. And then they're to listen to these songs. Pretty good format. What do you think?
Fuck. I don't know how many times I've heard you say that Howard Stern is out of touch.
But just breaking into your own channel, I'm here with Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon.
breaking into your own channel. I'm here with Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon.
You know, ever since Epstein went up the river,
we're kind of bored, so we're gonna just listen to music, I guess.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So Howard's way more excited about celebrities
than the rest of us are at this point,
because celebrities are boring.
They're all over whatever social media,
they're in your face all the fucking time.
We don't care anymore.
Everyone who's at my house right now is gonna pick a song that they love.
There's a lot of cool people at your house right now.
Right now there's some cool people at my house and I would like to pick a song too.
Now I won't start it off either Drew or Jimmy will start it off or honey you can start it off.
Not me.
Not you.
Now the way the baths stern, immediately says not it, makes me think she gets a talking to when she's out of line.
And maybe I'm reading into this,
but the fact that he's just like,
yeah, you know, we're all gonna pick songs, maybe Drew,
maybe Jimmy, what do you think, Beth, you wanna do it?
No, no, I'll pick the wrong song.
I don't wanna be picking the wrong song over here.
And fucking everything up,
boiler she never does pick a song, but.
I was thinking her response, man.
No, I don't have a personality. That is precisely the case. Now Jimmy Fallon is going to do his DJ voice. Now he
used to do this bit on SNL back in the day. I guess he's not great at ad-libbing. I guess he's
funny when people write down what he's supposed to say because this is not working at all.
But do you do a DJ voice and get into it and do it in a DJ? Say hey, everybody.
Say hey, everybody.
Everybody, everybody, everybody listen right now.
We're trending right now on threads.
We are trending on Twitter.
You did the social media.
We are trending on it right now.
We got a big new song right now.
We're DJ right now.
It's Jimmy Thump, true Barrymore, however, sird right now we're hanging out.
There's a whole bunch of people that come down here.
Do DJs say right now a lot?
Is that a thing?
He was like stuck in a weird loop
he couldn't get out of.
Yeah, I think you hit it right on the head
that celebrities don't have a personality.
They have a persona that somebody else creates for them.
Right, so you get them all in a room. Can you imagine just before they started broadcasting their
mundane conversations what it was like in there?
Just I'm sure they're talking about fucking drapes and whole foods and yeah slave ownership or something
We missed it by 200 years damn it
We're so close. All right, so this is insane. Jimmy Fallon is out of his fucking mind.
You be thinks this is a viable idea.
Tell everybody your idea that you want me to do.
Wow, can I say this?
I'm not doing it, so say it.
Billy idea?
Billy idea.
I have an idea. I was just asking you and I said,
I don't know how you're going to say no,
but honestly, I want to., I do. I have an idea. I was just asking you and I said, I don't know how you're going to say no, but honestly,
you thought, I want to because I don't play guitar.
You do.
Billy Joel is doing a great residency in the Mad Square Garden.
That'd be fun if we ask Billy and surprise everybody and just mean you get on stage at
one random show and do a Beatles song.
That sounds horrible.
I've been to that show at Mad Square Garden.
I don't want to turn into a celebrity fuck fast.
I want to watch musicians
who don't play their instruments,
play great songs that I love.
And why would it be a Beatles song?
I have no idea.
That's a great class, you tell.
Jimmy found just like,
well, we gotta get up on stage with Billy Jolman
and perform music.
No, no, no, you gotta sit behind a desk
and interview celebrities.
That's what you do. I do want to sit behind a desk and interview celebrities. Yeah.
That's what you do.
I do want to point out the great Missy B is here.
She says, I used to work for late night with Jimmy Fallon and I can defend Jimmy that
he does have a great personality.
Now, I understand because Jimmy Fallon was a comic first.
So he's not like these other celebrities, which you're going to hear.
You're going to hear the Drew Barry Morris and the other celebrities in here who don't
have personalities at all and
Like you said Doug just to have personas and think everything they say is amazing because people just fall on over them
non-stop and it starts here with Drew Barrymore
She's gonna pick her song. She's the first one to pick their sign and how we're trying to turn this into like you got to pick a song
That's meaningful to you and I want you to explain why it's meaningful to you and
Because your father was cruel to you. That's what the song's about.
Yeah, good point. I didn't even think of that. He probably did want to go
to him as a childhood issue. You're hurt.
You're right.
And Drew Barrymore here and she has ideas about music. Tell us what you
I think Drew should start. What song are you thinking about?
Okay, I picked ELO.
Don't bring me down because it's a song I loved when I was young, but it's really
in my repertoire right now and I just put it on a playlist.
I have a question about that song. Yeah.
And two.
All right, I'm, we're gonna, I just pause it.
We're gonna get into the question about that song.
But I can't, I love ELO.
Sure. And I love that song. but I can't I love yellow sure
I love that song, but we've all heard it a million times. Yeah, that's not a song
I already know what their question is too
Well, okay, exactly you know exactly what it's gonna be and they all speculate and are completely wrong about it
Oh good. Yeah, I did good. I did a little research on this
When he says don't bring the down
Bruce who is Bruce is it Bruce? No.
What is he saying?
Brrrrr.
Is it Bruce?
It is Bruce for sure.
But who is Bruce?
I don't know and I want to know that would have been my question too.
What year is it spring scene, Bruce?
No.
So they don't know, but they know it's not right.
No.
For whatever reason.
No, he's not saying Bruce.
Do you know what this says?
No, I don't.
Okay, I looked it up.
He's saying Bruce, which is actually a German expression that's a greeting.
It can't really be translated.
But then I saw Jeff Lennon interviewed about it and he goes, I just made up a word.
Oh, but then everyone thought it was Bruce.
So then he started singing Bruce live in the concerts, but it was always just Bruce.
Was what he was singing in that.
So these guys had it all figured out though, apparently.
Now, what annoys
me about this is that Howard Stern radio DJ. This is very excited. He's going back to spinning
the records again. And goddamn, they can't hit the post because these motherfuckers get way
to goddamn excited about this stupid thing that they're doing.
I wonder what song. What do you want to announce? Oh, don't do the curly.
No, I can do comedy song.
All right, don't do a funny song.
All right, and now, coming at you, WNBC, ELO.
WNBC.
ELO.
ELO.
ELO.
I understand they lie.
Don't bring me down.
Come on, baby.
WNBC.
WNBC.
WNBC.
WNBC.
WNBC.
WNBC.
WNBC. WNBC. on, baby. WNBC.
Wank, wank, wank, wank, wank.
Right now.
OK.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
That's awesome.
That's awesome.
Oh, my God.
Is it funny?
What the fuck?
He says it's like a child.
Calm down over there, buddy.
Calm the fuck down.
My problem with that was he said, okay, what song are you gonna pick?
But don't make it a funny song.
Here's the songs that you can choose from.
That means something to you.
Yeah, I know.
I could get for business entertaining by the way,
somebody in the discord just wrote back somehow,
Howard Stern managed to make an even worse music special than Carl.
Yes, that's the point.
I'm trying to make thank you.
Trying to save my name over here.
So Howard goes WNBC.
He didn't even do it in the fun way.
Nope.
And Jimmy found loses his mind.
He's doing it.
Guys, get down here.
Everyone upstairs, get down here.
He's doing it right now.
You're missing this.
This is gold that's happening.
It's like again, it's really not as big a deal as he's thinking is Jimmy.
And they're all screaming and yelling. Okay. So now a bigger celebrity enters the time. It's like again, it's really not as big a deal as you think it is Jimmy. And they're all screaming and yelling. Okay. So now a bigger celebrity enters the room. Uh,
Jimmy is ready with his song. And I also want to introduce Robert Downey Jr. He's an
up and coming actor. He wants to want to, are you, do you want to follow, do you want to
follow ELO? Uh, you do. You can get on that mic. I will follow. You're want to follow ELO? You do. Get on that mic. I will follow.
You're going to follow.
Wow.
Robert Downey Jr.
You will tell everybody what you do in case they don't know you are.
I make faces for cash and chicken.
Oh.
I am an aspiring radio personality.
I have a very good experience.
Very live right now.
This is actually going to look.. By the way you look tremendously fit
So how is he showing off for his celebrity bodies? You can tell this is what's happening
He's just like hey guys you know what I can do. It's like a fucking trick. Yeah, I can go on the radio right now
I'm a town. He's been waiting patiently in the closet for like
Days but that again it shows you has no personality. Yeah. Like I like Robert Downey Jr.
But I've never enjoyed him being interviewed anywhere. And the fact that he's trying to be
witty or charming, it's just not working. I never heard that face for radio thing before.
Oh, it's good one. I was just sitting here thinking about at some point, I'm going to come to one of your live events
for whatever and sitting up at a bar table or on the bar with you
and say, come on, Carl, do it.
Do it.
Just do it one time.
Do it. W-I-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-D-F-E-E-D-F-E-D-F-E- this is not Instagram. Carl. I'm streaming this. What? What?
It's crazy.
Shit.
So Howard's obsessed with celebrities, obviously.
And so let's keep them coming in because he's down in the basement where his studio is.
And they were having a dinner party upstairs.
And so now they're just rolling in.
Oh, and look who just walked in the room.
Ladies and gentlemen, JBJ, Sean Bon Jovi. He's here. He can hear. He's all right. He's all right.
Hey, John, we'll say, tell people what you're doing, kids. They never heard of you.
We are experiencing a moment. But for those of you who are out there listening, this,
when we say is live, it is nine o'clock at night. It's 8.55.
What a dick.
Yeah, we know it's live.
John, people aren't as excited about that as you all seem to be.
I really don't understand this.
Okay.
So now John Bon Jovi shows up to tell us it's live because I guess he didn't hear the
first part of the show where that's all they talked about.
And now more celebrities enter the room.
I know Doug, you're getting very excited over there. I can tell.
So what I'm trying to figure out is, okay, if he's got his little studio set up
down in the basement or wherever the fuck they're at. Yeah. Does that mean that
all these celebrities that keep walking in were just in a different part of the
house mingling? Yes. They're they're they're having a dinner party that a light
goes on. Yeah. Right. So, okay, they were having a dinner party and then just a group of them
Struggled off to the side and said hey, let's play music. Yes, correct. Okay, and I'm there's a big reveal here
Why they're even having this dinner party and why these people are here? But first I got introduced you to even more celebrities
Entering the room dog look at Doug just light up. He's like, yay, more
celebrities. Never seen like so skinny. This is my lit up face. Yes. You're an innovator.
This is innovation. This is exciting. Ali Wentworth is here. Oh my lord. Wow. Chris
Henchys here. Michael Morris is here. The last show this guy has to go to the rock
direction. You know, with Robert Downey Jr. John, my joby. direction. You know, and proper down to junior John Bonjoby.
And I'm like, have to explain to Michael Boris's.
Like, okay, well, that's not going as well as it was before.
We've also got the key grip from baseball.
He went worth whose George Stephanopolis's wife.
Wow, that's some get Howard.
How do you get that person over to your house?
It's pretty impressive.
Okay.
So now they're going to let John Bon Jovi.
Because I don't even know this, he's a musician.
They're going to let him pick the next song.
It was going to be Jimmy, but Jimmy's being a spaz
so they're like, okay, you can get this guy out of here.
So Drew picked the first song, and which was yellow.
And now John's pick is going to blow you all away.
John, be serious about this.
That's serious.
I've had many discussions with you about music.
You are a music of Fissionado and also a musician.
What is this song to follow?
E-L-O?
I want to pick Hotel California.
Boring.
Why not stay where it happened?
You know, something we haven't heard before.
Hotel California was John by, Joey Speck.
This is terrible.
I didn't think I could like him even less, but I do.
It's just terrible.
I was really hoping he would pick like one of his songs.
Yeah.
It's my life.
It's a worse song ever.
I think Doug, I think you played whatever that game was called.
I used to do out here where we determined what was the worst song.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I missed that.
I'm over.
I thought it was having a nice day.
Having a nice day, that's a bad joke.
He's out in the crowd.
It might be worse than I don't even know that one.
That might be the worst.
Sounds terrible.
All right, see, I used to tell you that you were wrong
and now I've changed my way.
He's like, I'm okay, well, you could be right.
Now, Ellie went worth is there
and she has a big announcement for everyone that we have
to definitely get on air.
Well, come here, Ali.
Say, say, well, I'm just saying that while the boys are getting ready to listen to
Hotel California, which by the way is a great pick.
There's a blueberry crumble upstairs with vanilla ice cream.
All right.
So what during the song?
I make it, but I think we should have a little crumble.
All right, so what during the song. I make it, but I think we should have a little crumble. All right, here it is.
Hotel California and my talk of live John Bunjovies.
WN, B-C, yeah.
Oh, my God.
Oh, I love it.
That's not said, that's not said, that's not said.
I'm talking up, man.
You doing the bitch?
You doing the bitch? You doing all the bitch. I'm doing doing the bitch? You did it.
You did it.
I'm doing all the bitch.
You did it.
That's amazing.
He has his friends over to his house, says WNBC,
and everyone loses their mind over this,
with blueberry crumble.
Well, that was exciting.
Yes.
Vanilla ice cream, too.
She goes, I didn't make it.
I wouldn't have thought you did.
That was accusing you of making ice cream.
Don't you worry about that.
All right. So as I've been pointing out, Jimmy Fowell needs a lot of attention. And he
starts singing one of the songs. Somebody who doesn't even know the words. I'll sign
them. I'll know the words too. He doesn't, but he's yelling at that. He's loving it. the chorus. Come on, use me. The best, best, best, best, best, to the place I was before.
Can I sit the night, and then we are programmed to be seen.
You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
You guys are good together. You know what I want to do after we play the song. I want to hear you guys do this
I cappella a little bit because it's here. You're actually singing very well wrong. I don't know what how it's listening to you
I don't know what's going on right now
Maybe you had a half a glass of wine or something right? It's tipsy. It's a little tipsy because it sounds terrible
It sounds like children and you knew that someone was gonna start singing along with the guitar solo right
So how are declares that they do a very good job singing the chorus together?
This is Robert Downey Jr. and Jimmy Fallon and so they're listening to the guitar solo and this is insane to me because
Doug I imagine you're familiar with this song by the Eagles, right? I am okay now. How does this song end?
I think you know producer Chris
Not with a chorus, but they're all waiting
for the chorus to come back.
Just sing along.
This is the first time we're doing this.
Get ready to sing.
Come on up.
Beautiful guitar work.
And they should have collapsed us
so we can get back to the beautiful guitar work.
Here I'm trying to tweet as I'm talking.
There's live power of 167.
And I see Brooke Shields is here ready with her song as well.
Oh, thank God.
There we go.
How can I talk about that again?
You can't talk to me.
I really can't talk.
All right.
All right.
This is it. That's it. The song's over.
You've never heard that before.
I can't believe nobody there knew that that's how that song ends with the guitar solo.
They're all like, here comes the chorus.
Get ready guys.
All right.
Oh, no, here it comes.
There's only 12 seconds left.
How are they going to pull this one off?
And then Brook Shield's best service to be the youngest person there by 20 years.
These are all that celebrities.
Hang it out over at Howard's house.
I guess that is too surprising.
Things are getting too wild.
Let's get Brook in here.
Yeah, she overstays her welcome by the way.
And Howard, through all of this,
thinks that this is going well.
Hey, keep it quiet out there.
We're live, baby.
We're live, we were live, we were live. We were getting out of here. Hey, keep it quiet out there. We're live, baby. We're live, we're live.
We're live, baby.
He's getting out of here.
Hey, no respect.
We actually are live.
Can I say something?
I wasn't going to ask people to come on the air live because we were having dinner.
But I'm glad now I did it.
I think this is working out well.
I'm enjoying the fun and the festivities.
It's working out very well.
Brooke, what are you thinking about musically, Robert? You were supposed to go next, but Brooke has walked in and the festivities. It's working out very well. Brooke, what are you thinking about
musically, Robert, you were supposed
to go next, but Brooke has walked in
and she's anxious.
She wants to get it on.
No, I would like to follow him.
No, I think you have to go.
I think you have the right song.
So the first song that came from
my mind was the letter.
The letter?
Yeah, but give me a two-year
before an airplane.
And get a chance.
I didn't even know a song
from this century?
Nope.
Wow, these song choices.
They sent one scene to the radio in 83 apparently.
All right, so obviously, how are things going great
because they show off all of his Hollywood friends?
Yeah.
It's like, see?
I have Hollywood friends.
They're all hanging out in my house and it's amazing.
And when I'm hosting a party, I stop everything
and be like, hey guys, isn't this a great party?
Yeah, are we all having so much fun at my house right now?
This amazing toast to me
Let's hear it one more time for me everybody
So then he tries to get Jimmy and Robert to sing hotel California
Like he was saying before and Robert obviously does not want to do it
Because that moment's past hour. Let's move on, you know, and he goes
I don't know the lyrics.
I, you know, it would take me a little time to brush up
if I were out of to do that.
So then some idiot, probably bathed,
Prince out the lyrics.
Yeah.
Yeah, I got that.
That's a no.
Robert's out of the jitter because no one's
going to fucking hit.
Yeah.
What is that?
Is that the list of lyricists?
Oh, guys, try.
You don't want to try it?
I mean, first of all, can we bring in a pro?
What?
Yeah.
Who is it?
John, think hotel California with these two guys.
All right.
Oh, he says one thing.
But you, all right, let's play the box tops.
Jesus Christ powered.
I don't know what kind of bit you think this is going to be.
These two assholes, fake singing hotel California song.
We just heard.
Now, you take, you take a bad premise,
which is get a bunch of shallow people in a room
and pick a song that you want people to think to find you.
Yeah.
And then force them, okay, we're getting rid of that.
I want you to sing on the spot, sing this song, go.
I did.
Usually that works.
Don't get me wrong.
It's time. It didn't work out well.
Forrest karaoke. All right. Howard finally picks his song and you were going to find out
why this dinner party is happening. Why are all these celebrities over at Howard's house?
What do you guys think of the cult? She sells sanctuary. Right? Sure. That's a band, right? John, we like them.
Robert's. Robert's. Yeah. Drew says, yes. Drew said, yes. Yes. Yes. Honey, I'm a hit.
Well, this is working. Did you want to pick a song? I did not. All right.
I'm going to end this by the way. Thank you for listening. I want to thank everyone
for picking their song. So I'll end this by the way, I thought it would be... Say hi.
Yes.
Thank you for saying hi.
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday!
By the way.
Happy birthday!
That was very, that was very uptight because there was a huge rain storm and it was afraid
that we couldn't be together tonight, but I'm so glad we're together.
And we would like to sing Happy Birthday.
No, no, no, no.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Happy Birthday to you.
Happy Birthday to you.
Oh, you think that's Beth was uptight?
Yeah, I'm sure.
I'm sure Beth's someone who's uptight over there,
a rainstorm.
Now, so it's Beth's birthday. Does that sound like a bunch of
Beth's friends? Just Beth have friends? Or they just invite celebrities over to celebrate
her birthday now. I don't know. Maybe she grew up with Brooksheeld. I don't know. It's
possible. Maybe do it the high school together.
Well, I'm sure she grew up wanting to marry somebody who had a bunch of celebrity friends, so there's that.
That's what I'm thinking too.
That's kind of where I was going with that.
I was just shocked.
I'm like, okay, they're having a dinner party.
It's nice to have a while yourself to be in front of these people.
He probably did test all of it for COVID before they came in.
I guess.
But it's great.
He's actually there.
He doesn't sound like he's wearing a mask.
He sounds like he's just hanging out with people. Good on him.
But how fucking pathetic is that?
That for his wife's birthday, he has to get all of his a-list celebrities over. I'm sure Jimmy Kimmel's kicking himself.
If only he had known they were gonna be out in serious sex.
It was a nice dinner party right up until they started recording it. Probably. Yeah, probably. It's probably fine.
Although I can't imagine. I to Doug's point earlier. I think you nailed it. They're talking about whole foods
They're talking about the vegetables that they enjoy eating these are boring fucking people have nothing to say
Yeah, I so this whole thing that how long was the whole
Recording and hour and a half, I would rather listen
to three episodes of the Bunny Ranch podcast
than listen to that.
Doug, don't do it, man, come on.
I don't know what to do.
He said, it's set off from that ledge, my friend.
Come on, come back to us.
All right, Doug, I'm gonna cheer you up.
Thank you for sitting through that.
I have a trip for you.
I thought this was gonna cheer me up.
No, that was not it. This is gonna cheer you up. Thank you for sitting through that. I have a trip. This was what was gonna cheer me up. No, that was not it
This is gonna cheer you up on it Don't tell me if you don't like my show. Don't tell me. I go for the girl.
Because that's absurd.
I'm the great job awesome YouTube channel, Patrick Michael,
Petty Pukewater, Petty Seacups.
He has been doing some live streaming this week.
And this is one he did just the other day called,
The Doctor is in and he starts off off and apparently there's more people than usual
hanging out there and so that's gonna give him some nerves obviously. But anyways, welcome.
It's rare that we start out the first few minutes of the show
with this many people guys, so the pressure is on for me.
The pressure is on, got to bring something I got to bring something I got nothing I got to look at my notes
this is the very beginning of the show this is gonna go out for three hours this
last year we did four hours the day before and he comes out and he goes oh shit there's people here I better say something I'm not I'm not I'm not nothing nothing he's he's a miracle
isn't he all right so he's talking about this this live stream we did the day before he's very
proud of himself for so check that shit out please support stuff. I don't care if you guys like it or not just support it
Because we're losing subscribers guys
We're losing subs on this channel. We're losing subs on my other channel. So like flies
Kind of weird Kind of weird you start hitting a real stride and then everyone wants to fucking leave dude
It's got a little work going.
Then you do a four hour live stream and you make a zero dollars.
I was one of the four hours yesterday and I made a zero.
Day before that, I think I was alive for 90 minutes and I made it. I lost $20.
He said he made $25.
Okay.
We had to get an hour to have the day before.
So it's better than Arby's maybe, right?
That'll really write on that.
I don't know, it's close.
That's sure.
So I think his next logical step is just to get off
this cactus TV thing and get in front of the camera
and do whatever reactions or whatever he's gonna talk about.
But if he's hemorrhaging subscribers right now,
that should tell him that maybe he needs
to change directions a little bit.
Well, it doesn't.
He will not learn.
He's just mad at people for unsubscribing.
It's everyone's fault but has of course.
And so now we're about seven minutes
into this three hour livestream. And he's got to go
to his notes to figure out what to talk about. And this is incredible right here. I'm going deep into my
notes here trying to find some stuff. Oh, damn it. I had hold on. I got to think. All right. What you're
about to hear now is dead air. I'll try to fill it as we're waiting for him to go through his notes and
Figure out what he was going to say
Seven minutes into a show and he doesn't even talk for the first two minutes. It's just watching the screen
Then he comes out as I got this people here always shit. What's going on? And so we're still dead air
This is still happening right now. He's still looking through his notes. I guess he's not yeah, I was going somewhere man
He's still looking through his notes. I guess he's not damn I was going somewhere man. Uh-huh
It's not well organized. I was going somewhere. I forgot what I was talking about though because I started looking at the fucking notes man
Oh Yeah
My notes damn it. I know better than to do that. That always fucks me up. Yeah, I wonder why you heard making any money at your livestream
It's got nothing to talk about but he was going somewhere I always fucks me up. Chad, I wonder why you heard making any money on your livestream.
It's got nothing to talk about.
But he was going somewhere.
He was gonna go somewhere and he lost his train of thought already.
But he's been promoting, he gets the YouTube channel he has.
So he has three now.
Well, there's probably four or five, whatever.
There's three active YouTube channels.
And I thought this was only on Instagram,
the at that dude with ears.
Doug, you're familiar with this, right?
Yeah.
This is where he does his metal improv, screamy stuff.
And I guess it's on YouTube now, too, which is exciting.
So I thought we could check out some of this music.
And you know, Doug, are you a metal guy?
I don't even know.
Yeah, not the scream-o shit, but yeah, I like metal. Yeah, I'm, Doug, are you a metal guy? I don't even know. Uh, yeah, not the scream-o shit, but, yeah, I like metal.
Yeah, I'm with you on that.
I think, uh, when someone starts cookie monstering over good refs, I'm like, I wish they would shut up.
Unless it's cookie monster.
Of course, or tookie.
I would watch tookies metal band.
Oh, totally.
But, um, according to Doug from the Jingle's apartment and Doug has been in the
metal scene for a very long time, he tells me that no actually Patty's pretty good at this.
So let's check it out. Maybe I'm crazy. You need a doctor, baby. You scared. You need a doctor, baby.
You scared.
Uh-oh. You need a doctor, baby.
You scared.
Uh-oh.
You need a doctor, baby.
You scared.
Uh-oh.
You need a doctor, baby.
You scared.
Uh-oh. You need a doctor, baby. What he does the singing stuff that's where he loses me a little bit. Okay, let's check out another song real quick
This is called uh chunk
No captain chunk and then is it after this where you're gonna cheer me up or
Yes, I have something very excited coming up where after this it's the other
YouTube channel that he started up recently that I'm very excited about it. I'm very crumbled with IZIP.
Hehehehe.
Hehehehe. Brother Yai Shai, number one Shai, my uncle Shou, my uncle Shou.
Yeah!
You make a fire, say for me!
Show your true love!
Where's the love, the chance for your true love? I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, This is a death core freestyle is what he's describing this as.
I don't know what categorizes that, but even the band behind him isn't very good in this
one.
It's not impressive music in any single way.
I don't get it.
I don't get it.
Okay, so the thing that gets me about him and I know that you can't say anything about
Patrick Michael that hasn't already been said before but He it's like his production is good and what I mean by that is his graphics
He's better at graphics than I am
say there yep his
All his intros and shit. I don't know how much of it is what he's doing and how much he's just taking
but
Everything is good and then he sits down in front of the camera and hits go live and it's like
I've got nothing but like he's got everything from behind the scenes. Yeah, nothing
After that point and the crazy part is because Doug has been with us from the beginning
Doug sent me
Chew gum right and said you got to check this guy out and
You would think he'd be better at
podcasting by now. You'd have to be better at podcasting by now. Yeah, that was like five years ago.
Like five years ago. And he's coming on and just like, all right, I got nothing. I got nothing to
talk about. Let me go in my notes. Ah, I can't find notes. There were notes, but I don't know where
the notes are. That's insane. At least you need to be able to read an IMDB page and write. Yes.
That's insane. At least you need to be able to read an IMDB page and
that's the best.
Yes.
So if I could give him any advice
which he wouldn't listen to is just focus.
Like just hold off on the music,
hold off on the graphics,
hold off on anything and just spend a half hour
preparing what you're gonna talk about.
Pull stupid new stories or whatever it is.
It doesn't matter.
Just pick one thing and fucking go that direction.
All right, perfect segue,
because what he's doing now is you started
up another YouTube channel.
Perfect.
And this YouTube channel is,
this one is called Something About Scary.
And this is one where he reads scary stories.
Oh, good. I love scary stories coming
from Patty Seacups. What's great about this story called the thrill is that he wrote it.
Oh, I don't know if you've ever seen this before, Doug, but you're talking about preparing
for a show. He wrote a scary story. He's now going to read to us. You. Wow. I told you
to get excited. You didn't believe me. So it's after this segment then that I'm gonna get excited. Come on!
What do I gotta do around here?
All right, this is pretty scary stuff. So I just want to warn you know, get your parents permission.
So let's do the next part of this show.
That's the other thing too is this is what you were talking about.
There's a bunch of graphics and animations and things and whatever this music is.
I think he creates it himself and it just goes on to way too long.
A lot of these videos are two minutes long and the first 30 seconds are this.
It's because he's still trying to figure out what the fuck he's gonna do.
Trying to find his notes.
Alright. He woke up again today.
After night of aggressive intense and reckless behavior,
the sipping, the chugging, the sweating,
it was a war within his cells.
What did he do?
Why was this time so easy?
It was always an ache like nothing else, but now,
it was easy.
Now,
it was easy. Now it was normal.
He stumbled around his filthy apartment. His thirst is unbearable, unquenchable, unhinged.
His thirst is unhinged. So is mine. I gave it unhinged thirst.
He just put a refrigerator handle in polls even though he knows there's nothing there.
He slams it closed and reached for the cabinet.
A single soap stain translucent red cup.
The faucet rushes something that isn't water at first, then he fills the cup, chugs
it down, and then does it again.
The water is cool.
He can feel it run through his body like the old hose at his grandpa's house.
The old hose? That wasn't hose.
He can feel the cool water run through his body like a hose at grandpa's house.
But don't you get it?
I know, he can paint a picture, okay? Alright, fair enough, move it on.
It refills, retains, and refreshes. But it's just beginning.
The shirtless grizzled man
strolls back to his mattress on the floor and his poorly sized grey sweatpants. He's not exhausted.
Poorly sized and tight and loose. He never explains it. I don't know what to make of this.
I know he's shirtless. I know he hasn't shaved it a bit. I just went past so fat. That's why I know so far. I'm petrified
You need a blanket to curl up it
Not physically is mine wanders a
Night full of adventure beyond imagination and yet he feels fine. He feels empty almost
But why it's you wait a second. What's this and he feels fine or he feels empty that's those two different things he there there was an old post from years and years ago
where it was funny writing analogies or something like that yeah and and it's like that's his
style of writing like me he was as tall as a six foot three inch tree yeah that's good point
who is as tall as a six foot three inch tree. Yeah, that's a good point.
His pants fit like ill fitting pants.
Yeah.
Sure beyond imagination.
And yet he feels fine.
He feels empty almost, but why?
It's usually unstoppable.
It's usually worthy of more,
but now it's a blank chalkboard.
It's usually worthy of more,
but now it's a blank chalkboard.
I think he just stupidity one of those examples for us right there, Doug.
He stepped up perfectly.
The fuck does that mean?
He questions the joy, the memories, the fun.
Is it worth it?
When he continues to feel a giant void, it was filling the void now nothing.
Why does he do it in the first place? While his mind does laps,
he hears three loud knocks on his apartment door, and because his apartment is basically empty,
it echoes and rattles his brain. The man quietly steps towards the peak.
Production. I'm impressed. I think I'm there. That rattled my brain. I thought someone was here.
That rattled my brain. I thought someone was here. I thought a brain rattling knock would be a lot louder than that.
It's like, oh my gosh, it's chiquing my core.
Okay.
The man quietly steps towards the P-Pull on the door and notices men in uniform.
It's unclear what the uniform's represent, but he decides to put his brown boots on without socks and grab a black sweatshirt off the floor and head
out the window down the fire escape. It could have been a baseball team, it could have been
dumps counts. We're not sure what these uniforms were but I'm getting out of here.
And what was the point of the socks that he puts in these details that add nothing to the story
just making go why does he talk about it when he's wearing socks or not cares he's got a word
count he's got to meet yeah good boy
seconds after he hits the ground he hears his front door being breached he starts to run
and in this city a man that looks homeless sprinting is not uncommon
he hears shots from the window he recently used as a door, but he refuses to stop running.
And at this point he doesn't even feel like he's running.
His legs don't burn or ache.
His breath is calm and smooth while the terrain is reckless and people are on every side of
him.
But he pushes and runs faster.
Where is he going?
Why is he running?
He knows why?
But isn't it over anyways?
He's numb to it all. He's-
I'm not understanding who the narrator is in this. Why is he running? He knows why he's running.
Well, but tell us!
Yeah, here's what I think. He doesn't know what's going to happen as he's writing this.
Okay. Yeah. Maybe he didn't write it. Oh, okay. Yeah, maybe. Okay. Let's see.
He's numb to it all. He's dead. Well, he might as well be, but he won't let them take him.
After a few minutes of running, the broken streets of this drug-riddled city, a car full of
uniformed men catch up to him and proceed to make an arrest. The man doesn't give too much of a fight although he knows he could have if
Didn't he just say he won't let them take him?
And I think that was only separated by a comma
You wanted
The uniform men reveal that they're the FBI and they finally caught the man that they've been looking for
He knew that shit already, but how funny to hear them just a job like what kind of uniform were they wearing if it didn't say FBI
What would they be wearing?
Very good question.
Pogrosy, please.
Flesh robots, they are. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha The man had killed dozens of people and the FBI tracked him to a dilapidated apartment where the rats were the landlords
Isn't it dilapidated? Yeah, wouldn't the rest be the tenants?
They wouldn't be the landlords like all right unless this guy's really dumb
This guy's right in check. How do you spell that?
R18
So stupid I'm sorry. I'm getting it picky robots. They are
So stupid I'm sorry, I'm getting it picky robots. They are
The man had killed dozens of people and the FBI tracked him to a dilapidated apartment where the rats were the landlords
The man knew he was going down eventually
especially After he lost the thrill
I'm chilled to the bone guys. I don't know what to tell you. Stephen King's rollin' over and is great.
I don't think he's dead.
Where he sleeps. Either way, all right.
Is that like, M. Knight, Shalama, dumb?
I can't top that.
All right, moving on. I don't want to do a big long sanguano if people are getting burned out. There's a lot of centering John. But we're gonna have to say.
It was the part that cured me up.
He's a little overexposed right now.
But I do have to start off with Mr. Magenta.
So John had this song, I'll talk my way out of it.
That was his big hit song.
He talks about it a lot.
All the celebrities who had cameos in the music video.
Mr. Magenta has outdone himself on this one
with, I will fight my way out of it. Best shape on my life right now, it boxed through people's a good plan You're an over everyone because I am no wit
You can't wash me bitch and scream until my lads get filled with spit
I'm sick of kumi, usulean, or the lily spoke
So I'll piss the wit packing and punch that you write in the throat
They call me in a lie, I better yell my way out of it
I'm ready for a fight, and And a box my way out of it! Yeah, fight my way out of it!
And you, Carl, I got something special for you.
I'm gonna show you how real me plays guitar!
Let's go! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Oh, I'm going to do that if I don't like it.
Hey, John, can I try?
Oh, right.
Like you could do any better.
Oh, yeah, I could do that.
I could do that if I for the fight. Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness. second verse. I was like, fuck, I can't do this. He blew his voice out trying to see the stupid thing.
But very well done.
Yeah, that's great.
Mr. Magenta, I appreciate that a lot.
Now, I wanna pick up where we left off last time,
because beer on the balcony is back
and it was supposed to be OP, OP canceled,
because of weather.
Right.
And so we got Alisa Jordana.
And what I wanna present to you today,
John has said many times that I think I'm Howard Stern.
Now, I don't do anything that Howard Stern does.
I've never tried to be like Howard Stern,
but that's what John knows as a guy who's good at broadcasting.
So he pretends that I'm copying Stern.
What I'm going to show you today is that John's actually
the one who thinks he's Howard Stern.
The way he's interviewing this woman
is reminiscent of how Howard would talk
to attractive female guests,
back when Howard was actually entertaining
and interesting to listen to.
The problem is that John doesn't pick up on any of the clues
that this isn't working.
Like, anyone else doing this interview would have pivoted long before John
Aver does.
So we'll start here.
Well, think I like about you,
Lisa, that you're an open book.
And, and, and, and you know,
I appreciate that because you came,
you just blatant just without
even worrying.
You said, oh, yeah, I had sex with
Vin Diesel.
No, I didn't. No, no, no, I didn't have sex with Vin Diesel. I went out with Vin Diesel.
Whoops. Well Ethan Hawke. Oh yeah I have my dad. Yeah. And David Blaine.
I might have.
What is that funny? Have you seen David Blaine?
Okay no. What is that? He's laughing at that. He's just like, no, what about you?
You came out and said you fucked 50s.
He's just like, no, I didn't.
I can fuck 50s.
So he's already, his research staff
is not doing a good job for him.
All right.
His team, yeah, his team's not doing him any favors on that.
So I don't know why John thought
that was such a hilarious answer
that she slept with like these celebrities.
But now John's got a follow-up question on this
So who was just be honest with me? I know you will be who is better in bed
Benji
Ethan or David
Well, Benji is the best guy out of all those guys, so who is better in bed?
Just bad nobody nobody's good in bed. I only like two people in my life have been good in bed
Okay, so you see what's happening here.
Alisa Jordana does not like sex.
She just said nobody's good in bed.
And maybe two people, maybe that's about it.
So right here, you gotta kind of change your pattern.
No, you keep asking questions related to her sex life.
Oh, okay.
Hey, well guess what?
I get right.
That's precisely what Chad decides to do.
People are good before you get to that, I think.
It's like very exciting.
Like I like the time, like when you're the courting area,
the courting stage, it's like the most fun.
Like once you get to the sex part, it's like so,
like I don't like that part.
That's like my least favorite part.
I like when you first meet the person,
it's like super exciting.
You know, you're imagining
all these great things and
it just goes downhill from there.
But but but you do get excited
right like about like sex
or like hooking up with somebody.
Yeah, yeah, before I do,
yeah, it's very exciting.
And then when you do it,
it's just a let down.
Usually. Yeah, yeah, definitely.
She seems fine. So no,
so no squirting discounted
No, I have to say and you know, she said the only two people were good and he asked who those people were as you know When I just came up with a number. I don't even remember ever having a good time
I just want to say this to Lisa if
Sex is everyone sucks. It might be you
It's very possible that That's a Lisa problem.
Or she's just trying to be very unsexy
and get out of this topic.
Yeah, that's also very possible,
although I've heard her talk it like this before.
Oh, okay.
Eric Shun with two bucks says,
Alisa's beautiful, John looks like a grandma.
And he leaves this up on the screen for a very long time.
Which is always fun.
We're not getting salted for two bucks, you know?
Dignity, shmig-dignity. That's what I'm gonna say. I say that too. Which is always fun. We're not getting salted for two bucks, you know, dignity.
Bigity. That's what I say. I say that too. All right. Now we're gonna find out why John chose Florida.
As we know, John and I are neighbors and the reason why John decided to move to Florida is this.
And in West Palm Beach, I haven't met anyone. Not one soul and I've been here for like a few months.
And I don't have much more.
It's eight women to every man.
Oh my gosh.
Oh no.
It's single women to every man.
No, I doubt that's true.
Yeah, single women.
But if that is true, they're widows.
Right.
Right?
Because women live longer than men.
And that's where people go to retire and die.
And die.
So Johnson, they're going, oh yeah, I'm going to be scoring
that stuff in Florida, watch out!
He thinks he's going on a college campus or something,
he's like, no, that's not what this is at all.
All right, I'm sorry, we got side-trained.
Let's get back to sexy talk.
I know that's what Doug wants to do.
He wants to learn more about this woman
who doesn't have a sex life.
Talk about sex.
I think it's two people that don't have a sex life
talking about sex.
Oh yeah, by the way, we do get into that.
That is very true.
Great.
On the phone in one of our lengthy chats,
he said that any woman who says she orgasms
during intercourse is lying,
the only way that a woman's gonna be able to orgasm
is through oral sex, that's what you said.
I said that.
Wow, I'm gonna say a lot of stuff.
In a private message to me.
I remember everything.
In private conversation.
You remember that, that's for sure.
Okay, um.
Okay, not.
So I think, I mean, I, gosh.
Yeah, I don't know.
Like I can't imagine like having an orgasm from penetration.
Maybe some people have.
I can't imagine that happening.
Wow, died of my stuff there, John.
You're really getting this girl to say some sexy stuff
right there.
Pretty good stuff. Yeah, I don't like dick.
It doesn't do anything for me.
She doesn't like sex, Chad.
She's been pointing this out, but just keep talking.
All right, so if you talk to a girl,
it doesn't like sex about sex.
There's only one thing you can do that's worse than that
as an interviewer, and that would be this.
It's everybody's different.
I was just speaking for myself.
I'm kind of an unusual person anyway. So.
And all do you?
I'm old. I'm very old. I'm your age. No, really.
No, I'm great. Um, I know, I don't say it, John.
This is going great.
I can't believe it just asked her. How old are you? It's just like you weigh.
That's right. It's not the question you do not ask a woman.
I read such an asshole.
Oh my gosh.
And then this gets even crazier because he asks if,
well, she asks if he's having sex.
And he says not as much as I used to because I'm ugly now.
So that was kind of a good deflection on her part.
But then John asks the next worst question
you could possibly ask aside from
how much she weighed, how old are you?
So how many how many guys would you
say how many guys have you slept with?
So the last three years none.
And the last 10 years like two,
but in my 20s, I was like a very
happening person.
So how many you think, over 10?
In my 20s, it was like, you know,
I mean, I could think of like probably five offhand then.
But how many people?
Popular, total, like under 10.
Under 10, under 10.
She's a script.
Wow, you're good.
Yeah, yeah, under 10.
Because in these recent years, there have been nobody.
So John is a plodding her for not having my sexual partners.
She doesn't like sex, John.
I don't know why you're not understanding this.
She keeps telling you over and over again.
This is not her thing. She's not into it.
Well, I mistakenly said that his superpowers, he's incapable of being embarrassed.
He's incapable of taking a hint.
Correct. He has no idea.
He can deflect anything.
Now, I like a lot of people first met Alisa
when she was on the Howard Stern show,
dating Benji Brunk.
And I remember how much she used to talk about
she didn't fuck him when they were dating.
So this is a pattern here.
And for some reason, John is just not picking up on it.
And also, what was that slutshaming thing
where you applauded there for?
I don't know, so that was the right answer that I guess?
Yeah, that's what I was going to say is so apparently there was a right answer and she gave it.
Yeah, it's bizarre.
Don't even understand how that works.
All right, so then they talk about if, well, John, I guess she hooked up with a guy or didn't
hook up with them, but met a guy from like her discord channel or something.
And so she asked John if he's ever hooked up with a chatter
as they call them.
I think he's like Mexican, this guy from my chat.
I met a guy from my chat last year.
Have you ever met somebody, oh, you and did meet
somebody from your chat?
Did I, who?
Did they like throw into kill you or something?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I have someone like that too.
Do you know that?
I do.
I know.
You literally pointed a dime at the camera and go, this is for you.
So I met up with a guy similar to that situation, except he brought a screwdriver.
Orange juice using vodka? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha scarier than what I just said. Whoops, my bad. I love that she remembers Heather W and John does not.
Yeah, right. This is very funny. All right. So then they go back and forth a little bit, and now at least it's going to get to the story here about this guy that she went out of date with.
This Mexican guy from Discord that she thought was a good guy. But then I went out with him
on Valentine's Day and he did bring a screwdriver to the date
and I ended up handcuffing him because I didn't trust him. I thought he could kill me.
Louis, you have handcuffs? Just in case. Yeah, just in case of something like that.
Oh, is that the only reason you why you have handcuffs?
No, they're not like sexy handcuffs. They're police grade handcuffs because I do a lot of like IRL streaming with strangers and fans that I don't know who they are.
Fucking John's just not getting the heads.
Ooh handcuffs, whoo!
Jacking off right now.
Yeah, it's like, John, she's not bringing sex toys with her, she hates stuff.
They're not furry, okay?
Yeah, I don't know what you think this is.
And then did you roll some dice?
What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what some dice. One of them says lick and the other one has a part of the body. He had the screwdriver
to my throat like all the way in your throat. Did you take it all the way? How deep? That
whole story didn't make any fucking sense. John, I had no follow up questions. I'd be like,
well, how do you handcuff a guy who wants to hurt you? What do you mean you carry around handcuffs?
Is she a great like tackling guys and getting their arms behind their back? And I would watch that. That'd be
interesting. I mean, also tune into her. I don't know. Let's stream with her. All right. So then
my buddy, Gonzo, Shitcock calls in to Lisa while she's on the show and she pulls it up for her
John. And this is what I was talking about the other day,
where this was God's who told me this.
We were DMing and he said,
I think the reason why John is so much more animated now
is because he's used to teaching 10 year olds.
And so he acts like a clown in front of them
and they'll giggle at the stuff.
And he's just like, yeah, I got it.
You know, so now he's going on the internet
and doing the same thing.
So God's gonna get to asking that question.
Oh, wait, I'm getting a call.
Hold on, oh, it's God's though. Hey ask him that question. Oh, wait, I'm getting a call. Hold on. Oh, it's Gonzo. Hey Gonzo
Hey, Gonzo
What oh also and I don't know if this is true or not
But John had a friend in DC named Gonzo back in the day because he was trying to stay at Gonzo's house
When he was doing his DC trip to interview celebrities different Gonzo. So John's like, oh, it's Gonzo
I know this is Gonzo shittcock from the Howard Stern show who goofs out to Chad but anyway so what's up hey can
John can you hear ganzo can you hold them closer to me where would I go what I
hold closer to here okay go ahead gone huh okay I'm trying to scumball. I just want to ask, I'm a big fan, John. I just want to know if you can unlock me on Twitter.
And then I had another question too.
Okay.
John, do you think that since you've been back, your big return,
your personality, I noticed, is a lot more animated and like kind of like quirky.
Do you think that's because you've been teaching children?
And your audience has been children.
And now you're like doing the same comedy, like for children,
like with the crazy expressions of something
Yeah, you know the big affect
I'm just happier to do it now I know why cuz you're probably more relaxed
Well, yeah, because at least I was doing politics for the longest time. Yeah.
And you know I would have congressmen and women on. So it was very, and I had to do
research, I had to read book, you know what I had to guess on that was an author.
Read books. I read books. I was, I had congressmen and women on and it was fucking miserable.
Yeah. That's what he just said. That's what he just said. He goes, I had to read
book book. And my computer won't on now. So we got that. I don't think this is miserable
because he had to do research and nobody was talking about what a pain in the ass that is.
So this is so much better now. And he's a teacher. Well, he goes into talking about how rewarding it is to be a teacher.
And this is just fantastic.
And let me tell you something Lisa, like the good thing about doing that is that the kids,
like the notes they write here and like the cards they give you, which they're forced to do,
by the way. This is not a voluntary thing. It's like a teacher appreciation day.
And then they write little notes to tell other teachers,
Hey, Mr. Monde is your great.
And he's like, Oh, whoa, really?
Me a little bit.
I'm invited to my I have a special needs kid who, um,
three people invited me to a birthday party.
And a few days I'm going to go to a birthday party.
He won't shut up about.
He's got to do a special needs kids birthday party. He won't shut up about this. He's gonna do a special need kids birthday party. What? I want Mr. Molland into my party. I want Mr. Molland into my party. All right.
Well, see he's busy. He's not busy. He'll be here. That's insane.
Little a birthday party.
I mean, but yeah, but wow.
Yeah, you're a big boy.
That part of it was great for me.
Like when I would, when I walked down a hole,
I was smiling, did you have my favorite teacher?
I was smiling at that.
It's like, there's no way.
Yeah. There's no way kids are yelling,
you're my favorite teacher.
Cause I'm like, the kids say it's teachers like,
no.
Yeah.
He said it right.
I had the kids like, oh,
I'm on the limits.
So with that part of it is so rewarding.
And a lot of the teachers also knew that, you know,
that's the way I teach, I make it fun.
Now, he's going to give an example
of what he was able to make fun when he teaches.
And I swear I've heard him say this at least four times since he's come back.
This is the proof that he's a very fun and informed science teacher.
I bet you already know what he's about to say here producer Chris.
Now, so even though you learn that Jupiter's the largest plant in the solar system, it's
in a fun way.
But you know, you could make it fun.
You could bring your personality to it.
Yes.
Holy shit, John.
Unbelievable.
To end it, in all fairness to your previous point,
I once had a teacher that got in trouble
for drinking whiskey during class.
That was my favorite teacher.
Yes.
Good point. Those are always out of the drug. I had a drug addict math teacher. He was my favorite teacher. Yes, good point.
Those are always out of the drug.
I had a drug addict math teacher.
He was my favorite teacher.
He was great to give a fuck.
That's a really good point.
I had a few.
Yeah, it was the teachers who wanted me to learn
and succeed.
I was just like, oh, fucking writing my ass.
Fuck this person.
Tax and figure.
Jesus.
Great.
It's all you ever talk about.
You want me here on time.
Studying, bringing homework, fuck this asshole.
Again with the Mars shit.
Jesus Christ, this is math class.
Yeah, right.
Holy shit, that one random fact that Jupiter is the largest planet in our solar system.
He has brought up at least four times.
And I don't watch every second of what he's doing.
I'm just saying he's probably brought it up dozens of times. He probably still names
Pluto as a planet. What? That's outrageous. Let's get back to John Hittingon, Alisa.
And people are gonna, well, John catches himself here, but he explains that that's not what's
happening at all. At least here at a cute bite. Teams to him.
And everyone's just like, John's hitting on a lead.
I'm not hitting on it.
You just, we've been friends for a long time.
Yeah.
Well, your enemies, we're enemies too, though.
You blocked me from Twitter.
You just unblocked me to invite me to the show.
Haha.
Amazing. Well done.
At least that right there.
He goes, look, I'm not hitting.
I we're just long time friends.
We go way back.
She's like, we weren't even talking.
I forgot to tell two hours to go.
And if you remember from our last episode,
she didn't want to come on camera.
Right.
She wanted nothing to do with this interview
when he's been insulting her the entire time.
I noticed your hair's wet, but not your t-shirt.
It's just rude.
He says it's a store-bought sack.
And you go back outside.
Yeah.
Unfuck it a real. I love this guy. Oh, fuck it, a real.
I love this guy.
Anyway, so I wanted to just pick up on that a little bit.
I know people are burned down at Centering John, but he has come back in a big way and it
is very exciting.
Speaking of coming back, we haven't talked to Mary Beth a review girl in a minute I
feel like. Hello. How's it going to Mary Beth a review girl. In a minute, I feel like.
Hello.
How's it going, Mary Beth?
Good.
It's going.
Yeah, it's going.
Thank you.
My husband is in the background.
Wow, we all love Brian.
Now, I brought you on here because we have to catch a dabble.
I haven't watched this yet, but just from seeing the still frame of it, it looks like Cardiff
put this together from the time that Cardiff was on with Stuttering John just this past week.
And this is something that I have not really watched.
So this is hopefully going to be news to all of us, but Doug, you're familiar with catching
a dabble, right? I am. All right. I'm no good of us, but I'm dying for my with catching a dabble, right?
I am all right. I'm no good at it, but I'm familiar. Let's figure it out here
It's time for everyone's favorite game show to catch a
Daabler
Are you ready to play to catch a dabler ready when you are?
Are you ready to play to catch a dabbler ready when you are dog
This episode is brought to you by Arizona Bay coffee dot com
The coffee that you dreams dream of Arizona Bay coffee
Thank you, Gardeff lost that argument because he's not saying
Anything to do with the mole crap agree to disagree
No, how about you say I lost a dog classic. This is like
when someone interviews them up and only this time them up with his smarter. You
see I can take people goofing on me. I don't really care. Are they calling you
them up at her me? I'm not sure. I'm not getting them up and you're smarter than me.
I don't know. I am very smart. I don't know. Judged by your picture, like you look like you're, I don't know. Are you construction worker?
In the summertime. And what are you doing the full?
I all say is I'm in education, but that's again, something that Chad has been putting all over the internet.
Well, I'm happy to hear that, Cardiff.
What the chat's putting it all over the internet?
I'm the one who's trying to get the answer right.
Not a teacher.
That's fucking right.
I will point out people who aren't watching this
that there isn't advertisement on here
that this entire episode is up on Cardiff's Patreon.
If you wanna watch Cardiff with Senator Jamal on this.
Something that Chad has been putting all over the internet.
Well, I'm happy to hear that, Cardiff.
You know, they need teachers, don't they?
Not a teacher, but I'm in education.
What is Sean saying next?
The main of your choices.
Number one, a special needs person.
Be, driving the short bus.
Next, on the lunch menu.
Four, with a smirk on John's face.
A janitor.
Lastly, a teacher.
To the...
Okay, now on the lunch menu is way too clever.
Yeah.
There's no way.
Just as that, I mean to give him props,
because that would be funny.
All right, what are you saying?
I think that it's number four.
Okay.
With a spark on his face, a janitor.
All right.
I'll go to you, Doug.
What do you think?
I went with C.
Oh, so I think four has way too much detail.
It's like when you lie, you create a bunch of details to them.
Yeah, you're probably right about that.
Mary Beth, what do you think?
So Doug, you're taking lunch menu. Yeah, okay
Let's see I think I would go with the janitor as well, but I don't want Cardiff to win
So I will go driving the short bus because
Johnson is old well, yeah, two of these have to do with special needs and that's interesting now knowing that he's been invited and he's
going to he's special needs students birthday party, which is why I'm going with number one. Okay.
All right. Let's find out a dabbler. If he says teacher, I'm happy to hear that, Cardiff.
You know, you know, they need teachers. Don't they? Not a teacher, but I'm in education.
You know, they need teachers don't they not a teacher, but I'm in education
A special needs
Person
What does that even mean?
I'm in a constant state of education
So you got the point there producer Chris congratulations.
I don't understand the point.
Well, we have a lot more time to go.
Let's see how it reacts to this.
A special needs person.
More maintenance.
I got your friend of mine does that too.
Finn, Gary and Diaz, thanks for two bucks.
So I'm gonna join, Bragg Moore about the clubs in it.
In Nevada, you played at Schmuck.
Oh, you hurt, you hurt, you mad, you mad.
Oh, you wanna hanky?
No. So John, Mark is your new thing for the five bucks. I have went
brain CC turtles. Uh, I'm about a little less anti-semitism. How is sheckles anti-semitism? to catch a dabbler part two what did John say nice also you must get both parts
correct in order to win today's game fucker number one it's money. B, Howard said it all the time.
Next, it's in the Bible.
Four, it's bullshit.
Lastly, cheap fuck to catch a dabble.
Wow, I mean, you're the one who qualified to win,
but I'm still gonna play a log, and that's all right.
All right, well, I'll go first.
I'll go first, just because I won.
So I'm going with three, which, it's in the Bible?
Yeah, yeah.
Okay, I'm gonna go with two Howard set it all the time,
and Doug.
I'm going with it's in the Bible,
because Chris is probably right.
Okay, good smart move, that's why I always go the Bible because Chris is probably right. Okay.
Good smart move.
That's why I always go first because that would copy me.
Mary Beth, what do you think?
Oh, I think I'm going to go with cheap fuck.
Okay.
It seems to curse a lot when he doesn't know what it is.
Uh, sheckles.
That's a good point.
That's about a little less anti-Semitism.
How is Sheckles anti-Semitism?
Are you fucking kidding me?
It's in the Bible.
Wow.
For new suppress coming through big time. I think I've been spending too much time
talking to John.
What's the bullshit?
Fucking all slowly can scream is anti-semitism. That's his big out fuck off. Making wealth and there's been two
bucks. I noticed that all your enemies are Jewish people. That's not you won't say
Jews. He won't say Jews. He calls it the J word. He's insane. He's tired of all
this woke bullshit and the people of the J word faith. What the fuck?
What about Muslims?
Oh, you can't say that.
Is name two non-Jews that your enemies with, please go.
Open cool me.
Okay, he might be Jewish.
No, he isn't.
Can't zoom Mark.
Might be Jewish.
Nope.
No, I didn't make a voice.
I didn't know. Have you seen their
10-month-scare party? No, I didn't know. Have you seen there?
Again, a very big Jew.
Shot of Gino.
I just love Cardiff. Yeah. He's killing it. Okay. So now you're just going to be silly.
I have to be a little silly, John. Yeah, I know, but you haven't one, one one one argument yet. John's here my six foot and five bucks. Hi, John, please know that
card of his and honest potato with integrity. Also know that we love you. You feed us.
Hey, Chad's here. My
You know, you know, I wouldn't mind hanging with you like as you and not a fucking, not
a vegetable. I'm in. I'm in. I will come to
whatever, whatever. What's taking you live in Minnesota. Ah, are you Scandinavian? No. Oh,
because you know, a lot of the Scandinavians moved to Minnesota. That's why they, that's why we
had the Vikings. Mm-hmm. School 89 Damn. Hey, we just fucking fun fact.
Yeah, that's all for this time.
Come back next time to find out if you are man enough
to catch a dabble.
Brought to you by Arizona Bay Coffee.com, Arizona Bay.
The coffee that your dreams dream of
It's every time with that shit. There's there's Tommy for some reason Yeah, Tommy's always at the end. He's the Sydney boost set of his of his stuff. Wow
Well, that was a fun game. Congratulations producer Chris. Thank you. I'm impressed. I'm looking at you in a different light now
Yeah, Kevin wants you out of show you're
Way to get your death everything's been building to these moments. Oh, what's Brian dude? He's being a creep sneak it around
It's giving no I don't know he's asking something. It's giving no start review girl right now
So she sound like shit. I think she's on the wrong bike. I think she's on the wrong mic too. Yeah, she does
I thought I fixed it
You said like shit when you first came on it might be better now
Thanks Brian
Tested my neck is it the USB
Thank you Brian all right all right. See you guys. That's the end of the show
Alright, alright, see you guys, that's the end of the show, but uh... Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha show over this summer vacation and Best really want to talk about what he was up to over the summer. I don't know if you ever got into that right We saw that pantypube water is live streaming for hours and hours a day for shuckles
Suttering John is being a creep and trying to do his best hours certain pressure
But it's not working at all how would actually get girls to talk about sex whereas at least I watched nothing to do with any of that
Chris was able to catch a dabble or so you know what that means. It's time for everyone's favorite part of the show
And I've already announced this, but this Wednesday,
it is gonna be Stuttering John and myself,
just the two of us.
Just sex talk.
What?
It's gonna get real sexy.
Seriously though, how big is your penis?
Sub-Irax.
What's the sub-Irax size?
Someone answered that.
I can't remember what it was.
Someone goes, full your act, like, yes.
Yeah, and that's the oldies.
So it went the batters.
Anyway, this one's...
How big is it when you don't have any heat
and you just get out of the shower and it's 30 degrees outside?
Yeah, and your grandma's standing there.
You'll grab a yardstick.
Oh, so full your act.
Just ask. All right, so this Wednesday, 6 p.m. Eastern time
on the Who Are These Podcasts YouTube channel
will be myself instead of John.
So people are speculating I'm gonna go in there
like Chrissy Mayer and be like,
hey, we're friends now.
Not the case at all.
Not the case, it's gonna be a debate.
I'm looking forward to it.
We have a lot more to talk about.
We did have a debate on Mizuoows Company a couple of weeks ago,
but there's a lot more to talk to Jon about.
And I think it's going to be a lot of fun.
It will be a lot of good back and forth going on.
You know, I just hope that he doesn't outsmart me.
Make me look foolish.
Can I?
Can I interrupt you real quick?
Because I was just waiting to see if you would reference it.
So I had to watch the first interaction of you and John on
Shuley's channel. Okay. And out of everybody's sniping everybody and
everybody talking, I think Shuley had the best line. I sent you a clip just
called Shuley. Oh, yes. Alright, let's check this out. Good, good call.
Chad, I'm glad I can give you some content to Kevin. You just sit back,
drink, we'll, we'll handle this.
You know, you do what you do best.
Wait for everybody else to do something.
You got it.
How rich was it that Shule was telling somebody else
that what they do best is waiting for somebody else
to start a trend?
Okay, I thought you actually thought,
Shule said something funny for you.
Yeah, I was waiting for you.
He'll bait and switch.
She got me with that one, jog. All right, that sounds a bit red, you actually thought, she said something for you. Yeah, I was waiting for you. He'll bait the switch.
She got me with that one.
I'm sorry.
That was a bit red.
I just heard you're saying.
So that's what's happening for the next episode of
Her These Podcasts, going to be myself and John.
And this is the round two of three,
because we're going to do another episode,
hope for you on his channel sometime after that.
But I hope that everyone comes on and watches that live
and getting the chat room, ask your questions. We'll be on their paying attention. on his channel sometime after that. But I hope that everyone comes on and watches that live and
getting the chat room, ask your questions.
We'll be on their paying attention.
We'll get you on when we can.
Doug, thank you so much for coming on the show today. You're fantastic, buddy.
Thank you for having me.
I always enjoy it.
Yes.
You picked a great one for us.
That bunny ranch show.
Wow.
That is a good one.
That is, yeah, that was a good one for us.
So thank you very much for that.
People to check out.
Who's right podcast with you and your buddy, Anthony, still going strong after all these years.
Who to fuck it?
Yeah.
We got a community guideline strike, something about Nazi scientists took us down for a week.
So we'll be on rumble this week.
No shit.
So why, what did you do with the Nazi scientists?
What was the context of this?
Now we had somebody on who had written a term paper or something about eugenics.
Okay, so she had a guy on your show that is not approved for YouTube is what you're saying.
Who would have thought that? I didn't know that.
You know what's stupid about that though?
As Alex Jones had his channel, but Alex Jones can still be on other people's shows
on YouTube as far as I know.
And he's like persona non-grata.
So I'm surprised that just having a guest
on your show will get you,
I mean, you didn't get Nuke
really off seven days, right?
Yeah, well, so I think where we fucked up
is we have somebody doing all of our thumbnails
and clip editing and all that.
Sure.
And the stupid cocksucker put Nazi scientists wants to eliminate the Jews or something.
And then it's got a big fucking swastika on the thumbnail.
Like, what the fuck did you expect to happen?
You stupid shit.
It dokes in there with thumbs up.
He's like, no, that's not a good image for me.
That's funny.
All right.
Well, hopefully everyone's learned a lesson over there at the Who's Right Network.
Anyway, people should check out Who's Right.
You're also on Patreon.
Yeah, you can find links to everything at Who'sRightPodcast.com.
Very good, sir.
Thank you so much for coming on.
Mary Beth, the SM Reviews for us.
Yes, I do.
Okay, we're gonna get to that.
But first, I want to say, please join us again next time.
I might be the episode we find out once and for all.
Who are these podcasts?
Well, every party.
Party in the must-visit of Morning Radio.
And now to show these clothes right now.
Okay.
Great show.
Good job, everybody.
Great job, everyone.
From Discord, Rek has a request.
Please ask if Rey has ever been tested for autism.
That would explain a lot.
Go-go gadget-wing confesses. Rey is such a retard, but God damn if I don't feel like I
have to like him.
And goes on to add, someone doesn't like Carl?
That's impossible.
From Facebook, Dan J. Morris ponders, since John thinks screenshots are proof of anything,
can we get a screenshot of John posting a link to Carl's bonus shows?
Benjamin F. Cohen?
He thinks Shulie photoshopped him to be fatter, however his screenshot is pristine.
Ronnie Greer, I'm wondering if you really could share John's book for free.
Isn't their digital rights management?
Pablo Meza-Sharis?
Alex Stein was so good on the hypocrisy police show even though John constantly screamed over him.
Alex stayed calm. Bravo. Matthew Maryam. Wait, someone was able to scream over Alex Stein.
My Losanchez notes. Everybody is good on John's show. Except John.
Brett Pertio Pines. Kevin Brennan looks like a nerdy L. Bundy. Somebody had to say it.
I on force. Pssss. More like Ted Bundyssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss in this episode, too much of it on my YouTube feed, but then immediately retracts with, I take it back, I'm enjoying this .jow on watp.
From YouTube, Rob Berglund comments, John gets so excited at $2, then tells you how great
his life is going as a talent.
Bakuslon, John looks like even his hair is trolling him, I can't stop looking at it.
Robert Ashton, Ray, B, Quiet.
You're making SJ sound intelligent.
Pillele 8283.
As fat as SJ is, there is no back of the Harley when he's on it.
Jim PK.
I've never known an actual tough guy that called the cops for anything.
One is such a pansy.
Marquita Farmer.
John's Big Lebowski moment.
Ah, hello, L.I.P.D.
Do you have a internet troll division?
Ed Cough doing eye roll.
Oh yeah, we have a whole squad of guys working
on trolling cases.
And from Reddit, Turbo 7049 plays us out with this summation.
Carl sets up a clip.
Chris Zings, Liam, Bombs, Ray.
I like to know.
Oh, those people on the internet are funny sometimes, aren't they? All right, Mary Beth, what do you have for us?
All right.
Enough of Shule.
This show, though great, obsesses over the most unbearable people.
Shule is the absolute worst.
Wait a second.
We're talking about Shule.
Is this an alko Rico show review?
Where are you getting these reviews from?
I don't know.
All right.
So the Shule hate is creeping into the WATP world.
All right.
Is that any five star review?
It is a one star.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
That was beat optimistic.
I should have done.
Okay.
Best show on the internet.
Carl and the boys do a great job,
joctoboring, patty, puke water,
Tom Myers, OP, Stuttjo,
and all the other terrible podcasts on the internet.
Despite the fact that Carl is a little bit effeminate
with a beard for a wife, love you boys.
Skull!
All right, that sounds like a five star.
Very well written.
Thank you, sir.
Appreciate it.
I don't know why I was assumed that all the people
are reviewing us are guys.
I probably shouldn't do that.
I was like, thank you, sir.
It's very nice to hear.
Curls are hot piece of ass.
I'd like to get with.
Thank you, sir.
I do appreciate all of these.
I'm pleased to come in.
OK, I have one more.
It's titled gay.
And then it says,
Gandalously Gay.
It's a pretty gay.
I would hope that's a five star,
because otherwise I'm gonna.
It is.
Okay, thank God.
It's gonna be putting off those vibes for real.
Alright, let's check out some voicemails here. Nicky from from the Bronx. That Fugazi Goomba Tony, he still owes me $3 than a replacement
tank top. Jesus Christ, what a stupid fucking accent we've talked with.
Go yee-gees! Go yee-gees, Nikki from the Bronx Bronx guess we've got a rivalry going between uh...
niki and to be over there
paco checking with us
yeah with the car
this is paco anyways uh...
you know your last episode i just want to say made a video
you know he's not my cup of tea you know saying as part comedy
but uh...
i don't want to hit on the guy you know he's trying to
uh... anyway don't take a picture I said niggas book. Why not could we review my show list to my show
I need some pointers on it, you know what I'm saying?
Get me on and we'll talk about it. You know something that should be so
anyway
Talk without shout out to Ray DeVito actually. All right, man. Peace
Maybe I should put a pull out should we do Pacaco show with Paco as our guests on the show?
Yeah, put a pull out. Let me open a pull out. I don't know how that would go.
Because I like Paco. You know, having ray on, that's a different story.
But I like Paco.
He's a good guy.
All right, he calls in again.
Yeah, let's go, Carl. This is Paco.
I think it's about seven weeks now since I've asked for Andy's email.
And listen, I don't know if I want to listen to Andy show.
I don't want to be disappointed.
So I'm taking my time before I even listen to it.
I'm sure it's quick, but you know, without Carl, Andy is kind of like, I don't know if
he's good or not.
You know what I'm saying?
So I'm scared to check it. Tell me, but, uh, yeah, man, if you can give me
a email, please.
It's not only without Carl's also with Brother Joe,
but you should check it out.
It's a very good show.
It's a very good show, Paga.
Yeah, man, if you can give me a email, please,
I'd appreciate it, man.
And I need guests, like good guests, you know,
like Andy Calibre guests are my shit you feel
me but anyway I let you go home I don't give a fuck man shout out to shit man you know I shout out to
okay shout out to you shout out to me fuck it it. Alright, I see you later, my man. Boo!
Can't give yourself a shout out.
It's a shout out to work!
Paco!
Everyone knows that.
Shout out to Doug.
And I have checked out the All Apologies podcast and it is alright.
It is alright.
It's fun.
I've listened to several episodes.
Me too.
I enjoy it.
And you have a Tiger Woods one. If people don't remember what that whole thing was and it was funny because it seemed like
Jojen get the assignment right because Andy came in with all of the controversy with all the mistresses of the sacks
And losing his spottership deals joke comes it was stats. Oh, it's crazy shit joke comes and he's just like
Yeah, well, he also made a joke of the golf course
He threw like a tampon at the guy he was golfing with.
He's like, yeah, that wasn't a big deal.
That's how people are going to be.
He didn't apologize for that.
That's how people are going to remember Tiger Woods for.
But okay.
It's like bringing Bill Cosby into it and only talking about when he
flubbed his putting lines.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I haven't listened to the segment yet, but I paused it because he said criminal doesn't
rhyme with animals.
He realized the spelling doesn't ask it's holy match nor does the phonetics have to
totally match for it to rhyme.
As a songwriter, you think you know that.
Hold on a second, I didn't say anything about spelling.
I know that spelling doesn't have to match for it to rhyme, but you phonetically yes, it
does have to match for it to rhyme. Otherwise, it's not a rhyme. It can be close to a rhyme
Am I the crazy one here? I think you are
But it's in that flex it's in the inflection of the word. He made it to where it didn't rhyme
Yeah, scorch definitely figured out a way to make it
That is true. You got his poetic license taking away speaking of scorch
Hey shit that is true he got his poetic license taken away speaking of scorch hey listen in the 429 right now every time you guys bring up scorch or guest to sense says some shit about his boys but how it's not really whatever yeah I
wasn't your hamper and I have met him personally when he was filming TFG TV
when Owen A used to rip on him I went to one of the filming and he talked like
that all the time and also worth mentioning
he was on an episode like people's quarter some shit one of those stupid ass like reality
TV 4 chose and the judge kind of roasted him asking him like are you sick or something
like what's going on with your voice and he told her that's just how he talks.
Anyway, stop calling me back with your erotic fan fiction.
All right, I will.
That is true.
That is how Scorch talks.
That's not like a radio voice. All right, I will. That is true. That is how Scorch talks. That's not like a radio voice.
As far as I know, now, the reason I say that is because I've met Wee's many times.
Wee's is a big radio personality here in Rochester, New York.
And he's also got a very gruff, distinguished voice on the radio.
But that's literally just how he talks.
So I think Scorch is the same from constantly talking.
Possibly. talking too much
So I'll be what I'd say talking about this place I never heard of you know they kind of went back and far this great radio I just want to let you know that oh but this my tip got so
raw card with Ray was trying to name off all the presidents oh man I can't
be fucking off all night long I'll tell you what I'm gonna think about that
pretty weird to go that's pretty good stuff I agree
and I that was gonna punch
bye alright yeah Ray had a good good showing with this naming all the president's thing.
What can't that guy do?
When he said he couldn't name the planets in order, I'm like, I wouldn't have thought
you would have.
I didn't know about the money I would have been on.
Ray probably knows the planets in order.
I got no shit. But then he actually did no presidents. That was pretty impressive. I feel like it's a party trick
He pulls out of his ass when he needs to or something because he seems every party
Let's invite the presidents guy. He's always a riot
You know Carl
Everything was John ever
You know, Carl, everything was John ever could be blown over. If all you did was like, buy him some tickets to a dolphin game and you both went together.
Like, if you just did something recreational together, I think he would solidify a bond
with you that will never be broken.
He would, you know, he doesn't like the lie, but
he would start liking the lie for you. But like, he's a weird guy. I just, I just assumed
something very small like that means more than like $3,000 for an appearance. He's a
weird guy. It's less than that, sir. I had a phone call conversation and he thought we were BFFs.
He thought he was gonna be swimming in my pool
later that week because we talked on the phone together.
I think it's completely different
than what the caller suggested.
I don't think there's a bond with John
that can sustain any length of time.
No.
All his bonds end up being broken.
Correct.
Because they're one way.
They're very transactional.
The way that he works.
Hey, this is exciting.
Back of the day, we used to get Fran D'Rachra calling
into the voice mail at the time.
And I don't know if she's have to listen to the show.
I know she's been very busy with the strike lately.
So I was very excited that she called it again.
Hi, Collie Poe.
It's Fran D'Rachra. Hey Fran. I was leader of that she called it again. Hi, Collie Poe. It's Fran D'Rassha.
Hey Fran.
As leader of the actors guild, I was curious if your friend Jean Albus
can't do you have any opinions on the strike.
Also, do you want to know how I became president of SAG Astra?
No.
Because breast cancer raped me so hard that I cut my tips off,
they tend to SAG Astra. No, because breast cancer raped me so hard. They had to cut my teeth off.
They tend to sag after.
Call me back.
Probably cool.
Oh, Fred.
Yeah.
What a card.
Some pretty good stuff right there.
I missed her colleague into the show.
Her voice has changed a bit.
So little from the, yeah, from what you used to call
those years ago.
Yeah, these things happened.
Obviously. All right, Mary Bath, so good to see you. Yeah, thanks what you used to come those years ago. Yeah, these things happen obviously
All right, Mary bath so good to see you. Yeah, thanks for having me. Thank you very much come back anytime same to you
Doug. Oh, should I announce this? We're talking about doing a show an episode of WTP. I'm thinking next month I got to coordinate with you guys
But we're talking about doing it's been a long time since I've done a show that I wasn't on
Now we've had Doug and Kaya takeovers before people love those But we're talking about doing, it's been a long time since I've done a show that I wasn't on.
Now, we've had Doug and Kaya takeovers before.
People love those.
But we're talking about doing a Doug and Brian Johnson takeover.
Oh, who are these podcasts?
We should give me a day off, which would be nice.
But also, I think that would be a fantastic duo and it'd be a lot of fun.
So let's get that scheduled very soon, sir.
Yeah, I know someone is excited about it. So let's get that scheduled very soon, sir.
Yeah, I know someone is excited about it.
Oh, good.
All right.
You're, Mary Bats, you're not looking forward to it.
Oh, I'm always looking forward to whatever show he's doing.
Good answer.
All right, Doc, we'll get that scheduled.
I'm excited.
Thank you for doing that in advance.
I do appreciate it.
All right, and with that, I will appreciate it. All right, and with that I will say goodbye.
That was a great episode.
That was really great.
Arrrr, arrrr, arrrr, arrrr, arrrr, arrrr, arrrr, arrrr, arrrr.
Okay, bye.