Who Knew It with Matt Stewart - 23 - Ben Russell, Dave Warneke and Suren Jayemanne
Episode Date: February 13, 2023Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features comedians Suren Jayemanne, Ben Russell and Dave Warneke!Check out Matt's s...tand up special FREE on YouTube: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhESupport the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!See the show live, get tickets via: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/Check out Matt's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/Theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and Logo by @muzdoodles! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Oh my God, can you believe it? It's the year 2024. It's Melbourne Comedy Festival and we've just moved venues. We're at the Grace Darling now. We had a great run at the Chinese Museum, selling out shows by the end, but now we need you to come over to the Grace Darling and shows are at 7.15. It's going to be so much fun. Love to see you there. Let's have a beer. Use discount code do go on the show's called dry dry at the
melbourne international comedy festival then we're going to sydney and brisbane tickets to all that
stuff's on sale now and you can find those tickets and details at mattstuartcomedy.com
welcome to who knew with matt stewart the show where the guests write the wrong answers.
I'm the titular Matt Stewart and our first guest this week comes from the Do Go On and Book Cheat podcast.
It's Dave Warnicky.
Good hello.
I wanted to say morning, but then wherever you are, good hello to you.
Good hello to you too.
Our second guest this week is the host of Good Tucker.
Please welcome Saren Jayamana.
Hello.
And our third and final guest is from Channel 7's
We Interrupt This Broadcast.
It's Ben Russell.
Thank you.
Well, I mean, that's not even out yet.
Yeah.
It's going to be out, but it's not out yet.
Right.
But I do heaps of other stuff too.
I did ask you which thing to say and thought we agreed on that one.
I didn't listen to you.
Okay.
You just said, yeah.
Also, you know, mate, you're titular, but you're also eponymous.
And I think that's cool.
Wow.
Can I have that?
Yeah, of course.
Eponymous.
Eponymous.
That sounds great.
I think I got that right.
I hope I did.
Otherwise, you know, I'll look a fool.
But at the same time, don't write in.
You know, I don't want to know.
I don't want to know.
Remember those times?
I mean, you guys are old enough.
Back in the old days when you used to just say something
and people were like, oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, great days.
You get away with it.
Yeah, you get away with it.
And now they're like, oh, I don't know about that.
I'm going to just check my source, you know, go go on the internet you'll be in a conversation you'll notice that
they sort of their eyes go down yeah yeah yeah they've got their phone down low they're fact
checking what you're saying and it's absolute bullshit i mean it's ridiculous yeah i cannot
tell you i'd like to i weep when i think about all the good fucking convos that could have happened
if some if we'd just been like oh
yeah fair yeah rather than look i'll stop the conversation right one second how do you spell it
e-p-o-n e-p-o-n y-m-o-u-s yeah i think well there's one way to find out i can look that up right now
and the good thing is though now that we have know, phones and everything to check these things,
there's no more fake information out there.
That is true.
That is true.
I guess that's the give and take.
There's no more misinformation.
It's just one source.
No fake news at all.
Yeah, sounds handy.
All right.
That is good.
I take it all back.
You're right.
I'm wrong.
The way the show works is I ask a relatively obscure trivia question
and our contestants have to write a convincing fake answer.
I then read their answers as well as the real one
and I have to guess which one is correct.
Okay, are we ready to play?
Let's do it.
Here's question number one.
This one comes from listener Rachel B from London
and the question is, what is the meaning of the word absquatulate?
What is the meaning of the word absquatulate? What is the meaning of the word absquatulate?
Do you always say the name and then their species straight after?
Rachel B.
Yes.
Well, normally when it's a human, I don't bother.
If it's noteworthy, a B.
Can we have a spelling for absquatulate?
Absquatulate.
A-B-S-Q-U-A-T-U-L-A-T-E.
And while they're writing their answers, I'll explain how the scoring works.
You get one point if your fake answer is guessed by one of the other contestants
and another point if you correctly guessed the answer.
By the way, I'm also playing as the house.
I've put in two of my own fake answers with the help of the listeners
and I get a point for each of those that our guests choose.
So each of us can score up to three points per round.
It seems fair, but the probability actually favors me.
The House.
Boo!
Come on!
The House always wins.
So if you've listened to previous episodes,
you'll know that is often not the case.
Anyway, our questions come from our great Patreon supporters
from the Do go on podcast
network if you want to submit a question sign up on any level via patreon.com do go on pod
linked in the show notes all right the answers are in here is question number one what is the
meaning of the word absquatulate a victorian era word meaning to burp when one has the ambition
to sculpt their torso into a six-pack,
but unfortunately only four of the six-packs has been achieved.
Hence, you're late to everything.
To feast in a ravenous or messy fashion regarding a soup or stew,
as an example, Martin obscenely obsquatulated in front of the guests
after the hunt.
How much soup did Martin eat?
Well, he obsquatulated, so I assume.
Straight to the full pot.
Slurped it up.
Up the ladle, yeah.
Yeah, Martin slurped it up.
To break loose and leave suddenly as from confinement
or from a difficult or threatening situation,
the act of slipping on a surface not typically thought of as slippery,
or a 19th century exercise that was meant to work your abs, legs, and arms,
but led to many accidental deaths.
Wow.
A couple of ab-based definitions there.
People have gone with their first thought, I think.
Just look at that.
Abs.
Yeah. There was one that was quite serious in there. Can you read. Abs. Yeah.
There was one that was quite serious in there.
Can you read that again?
You think it's quite serious.
Faced in a ravenous or messy fashion regarding
a soup or stew.
That was not the serious one. I think there's one about
to break loose or leave suddenly.
Yes.
As from confinement or from a difficult or threatening.
I'd like to lock that one in.
A difficult or threatening.
Can I hear the Victorian burp definition, please, Matthew?
Sure.
A Victorian era word meaning to burp.
Squatulate.
I mean, I was really tempted by that until Saran took a drink
and squatulated because you laughed at how bad that definition is.
No, it's not the definition that was bad.
It was just you wanted to hear it again,
but you gave all of the detail.
Matt, can you please reorder these words?
You're not going to fucking film me that way.
Okay.
You think I'm stupid?
Lock that one in.
Double bluff.
Lock that one in.
Double bluff.
Well, I think I am stupid because I'm going to lock it in.
Squatchulate.
I think it's a burp.
Burp.
Okay.
Locking that in for Dave.
Squatchulation.
And then so you did the break free.
Maybe you're right because flatulation.
Great.
Thank you so much. I'm going to go that one too.
Not where I was going.
You're also going the burp?
Yeah, why the fuck not? I don't know. Can I change? to go that one too. Not where I was going. You're also going the burp? Yeah, why the fuck not?
I don't know.
Can I change?
I think that's right.
I reckon that's right.
You can if you want to.
Well, I do.
I don't think you should.
But it's possible that the house will get three points if-
Okay, I'll take one for the team then.
I'll stick with it.
You do what you need to do.
Can I please-
I'll stick with the breaking out of confinement.
Okay.
I think you could be right.
That could be a burp.
I think that was a great guess for you. It could you could be right. That could be a burp. I think that was a great guess for you.
It could be a burp.
What do you think it is though, Ben?
I am torn between those two.
Okay.
Yeah.
What about the other ones?
No.
What about the one I wrote?
Which one did you write?
Well, we'll find out in a minute.
Maybe it's the burp one.
I really, really doubled down to get a point from you.
Okay.
So you're going to lock in the burp
or you're going with the serious scene? I'll go burp one. I've really, really doubled down to get a point from you. Okay. So you're going to log in the burp or you're going with the serious scene?
I'll go burp.
Okay.
All right.
Let's find out who wrote these answers.
Firstly, we had the act of slipping on a surface not typically thought of as slippery.
That was Dave.
Thanks for not even considering my option, guys.
Yeah, that was stupid, Dave.
Oh, damn.
Where was the reference to abs?
I didn't.
There was not enough ab.
You were an ab reference, weren't you? Were? I didn't. There was not enough ab.
You were an ab reference, weren't you?
Were you both ab guys?
I was not an ab man.
Okay.
A 19th century exercise was meant to work your abs, et cetera.
That was the house, specifically Rachel, the question writer.
Rachel, that was obviously fake.
It was ab-iously fake.
Okay.
How do you spell the word?
Is it with an A, B?
Yes.
Okay.
Well, that would have changed my answer, Matt.
When one has the ambition to sculpt their torso in a six-pack,
that was Saran.
Is this something you deal with, Saran?
You've only got a four-pack?
Yeah, I'm scotch-alating a lot, actually.
Sorry to hear it. I used to only have a four pack? Yeah, I'm squatchulating a lot, actually. Sorry to hear it.
I used to only have a four pack.
Now I don't have anything.
It goes, life comes at you fast.
Would you say that that's an upgrade from four to none?
No.
Oh, damn.
So for you, you're happy with four.
This isn't golf, okay?
These are abs. But at the time, the best golf score is zero.
No strokes. I didn't even get on the fucking. There you golf score is zero. No strokes.
I didn't even get on the fucking.
There you go.
Well done.
That's the correct life show.
Not even stepping onto the court.
Well done.
Then we had to feast in a ravenous or messy fashion.
That was Ben Russell.
Martin.
Yeah.
Ladle after ladle.
I love it.
So that means, Ben, you're right to be torn between those two because one of them was correct.
But the burp one was not.
That was Rachel and the house.
Rachel, you son of a bitch.
Well done, Rachel.
You had a go at her earlier for being obviously incorrect.
I mean, that's, yeah, and then she got me.
She did.
So I guess the worm has turned, as they say.
She really absquatulated.
She did.
So everyone's correct.
It was to break loose and leave suddenly.
Which you could describe a burp like that.
Exactly.
Oh, my God.
Please pardon me.
I absquatulated.
Some gas.
Gas absquatulated.
I do apologise.
Most profusely, I have squatchulated myself.
I am so embarrassed.
You've got one point on the board.
Sorry to do your job.
So Ren's got one point.
The house has got two points.
You picked it up pretty quickly, Ben.
I picked it up, but I can go in and you guys better watch out
because I'm coming for you next time.
I appreciate it. We did all the score to keep going, and you guys better watch out because I'm coming for you next time. I appreciate it.
We did all the score checks with Ben being that aggressive.
Time for another aggressive score check.
Well, I have two of the most aggressive comedians in Melbourne here.
In front of me, I've got to stay up.
I'm usually a very kind and gentle person.
We have a very forceful energy.
David is so intimidating.
I'm flexing right now. He is. Stop it.
My four pack.
You're all sinewy. You're like a young Bruce
Lee. Thank you.
Alright, we're up to question number
two. This one comes from
Gary J from the UK.
Gary J from the UK.
I'm Gary J from the UK.
Alright, Gary J's question is,
Detroit Tigers baseballer Joel Zamea missed multiple games
in the 2006 season for an unusual reason.
What happened?
Detroit Tigers baseballer Joel Zamea missed multiple games
in the 2006 season for an unusual reason. What happened?
While you're writing your answers, here's some more information about absquatulate.
According to Wiktionary, been around since the 1830s in American English, a jocular mock Latin
word blending abscond, squat, and perambulate, hence meaning get up and depart. Are you saying
that this word is jocular?
It's a little jocular.
Oh, my God.
I can't believe you fed us a jocular word in the first round.
That is so fucking wrong.
That was a bit sneaky.
Hello, 50 Cats.
Today I'm joined by my dog, 50 Cats, who is a tiny, long-haired sausage dog.
She's 10 years old.
10 years old?
Yeah.
She looks fantastic. She does. She glows. She's 10 years old. 10 years old? Yeah. She looks fantastic.
She does.
She glows.
She's glowed.
She's in excellent health.
If I had to take her guess, I would have said three.
Yes, that's what I would have said.
All right, so the answers are in for question number two.
Detroit Tigers baseballer Joel Zamea missed multiple games
in the 2006 season for an unusual reason.
What happened?
He got on the wrong train and fell asleep,
waking up at the end
of the line three states away.
Well, they do play multiple
games back to back, don't they? That's right.
In a week or something. Yeah.
He ruptured a tendon in his pitching
hand playing Too Much Guitar Hero.
It was 2006, yeah.
Checks out.
He got on a winning streak on the TV game show Jeopardy,
the filming of which clashed with some Tigers games.
That's good.
He fell down a well.
Oh, classic.
A blood parasite.
He picked up cave diving in a popular cave diving network called Miner's Bend
in rural Michigan earlier that fall.
Probably Michigan, actually.
No, I like, I think it's pronounced Michigan.
Yeah.
That's where Detroit is, I believe, which is the team he plays for.
Checks out.
That's fucking crazy.
What are the odds?
It's got to be that one.
The final option, he couldn't find his car keys.
By the time he gave up looking and decided to take public transport,
he realised he also had misplaced his car keys. By the time he gave up looking and decided to take public transport, he realised he also
had misplaced his bus pass.
At this point, he was at an
impasse. One foot in front of
the other, he trudged his way to the stadium.
It took a total of six weeks.
He lived
six weeks away from the stadium.
Can someone just
own up to that one now?
Michigan's a big place.
It's a big place. Because I'm up to that one now? Michigan's a big place. It's a big place.
Because I'm not picking that one.
I'm tempted by it.
It's a big place.
Honestly, I'm tempted.
And I think you should be too.
I think you should do it.
I dare you to pick that one.
No, I double dare you.
I double, I physical challenge you.
Oh.
What's it going to be?
What's the physical challenge?
You got to run around and then do that.
Pick that one.
Oh, damn.
I don't run.
You don't run?
So I'll have to pass on that one. What happens if you run um you don't run so i'll have to pass on that one
what happens if you run do you don't fucking people get hurt yeah not me others yeah you hulk out
all this michigan chat i totally forgot what that one was uh something about cave uh yeah
he got a blood parasite i'll'll just quickly go through them.
Okay, thanks.
So he fell asleep on the train, ended up three states away.
I mean, that is strange, but I feel like he would have people.
Yeah, even in 2006 it was a professional league.
It's still a multi-milli-tall league.
Yeah, exactly.
He hurt his hand playing Guitar Hero.
That one I could kind of believe, to be honest.
He got on a winning streak on Jeopardy.
That means it's plausible.
He fell down a well.
I mean, that could happen.
That does still happen.
Yes, it happens more than you'd think.
Do you think it's he fell down a well and then he was injured
and that's why he couldn't play?
Or he fell down a well and no one found him.
He was stuck in there.
He was trapped.
He was there.
Calling out. He's on the He was there. Calling out.
He's on the side of the milk cartons.
Yeah.
He had the blood parasite, picked up cave diving,
or he couldn't find his keys or his bus pass ended up walking.
Took him six weeks.
Okay.
What do we know about caves in that area?
I'm going to go the Guitar Hero.
Guitar Hero.
Because I think that, A, I respect it if it was made up.
I think it's good.
I think it fits within the parameters of the question
and it's unexpected, it's weird.
It's a little bit humorous, I would say.
A humorous might have written that, possibly.
But not a comedian.
Not a comedian, but humorous.
Someone who deals in humor.
Yeah.
Or an amusologist.
A smile merchant.
Yeah.
So I'm going to pick that one.
Okay.
I'm going to go with my gun.
And I also think that whoever did that deserved a point.
Love that.
Yeah.
Love that attitude.
Unless it's real.
Unless it's real, in which case I deserve the point.
Yeah, absolutely.
Dave, any thoughts?
Gosh, I'm thinking Jeopardy or cave diving.
They're my two.
Do we know Detroit?
Michigan?
Is it a cave town?
Cave town.
It's on one of the Great Lakes.
Is that right?
There's a big lake in front of this.
I did say rural Michigan.
Yeah, I mean.
Miner's Bend.
Is it a mining state? Is there a bend there? Oh, my gosh. Yeah, I mean. Miner's Bend. Is it a mining state?
Is there a bend there?
Oh, my gosh, so many questions.
I know about there is a place in Indiana called something Bend
or something, South Bend.
I think that borders.
Borders Illinois.
Yeah.
And, yeah, like Detroit's the big car making city,
but that's the big metropolis there.
Yeah.
And you would make cars because you've mined things from the ground,
brought it out to the factory, lock it in.
It makes sense.
All right, lock that in for Dave.
Cave-born parasite.
I am going to lock in the guitar hero, please.
Guitar heroes.
You're going guitar heroes here?
Fuck.
Someone's going to win big.
It just feels 2006.
It just feels so real.
But could it be the house again?
It feels so right.
Too many details in the cave one.
I don't think anyone here would have written it,
but it's just-
Harab, you think that maybe-
Overwritten is one of my trademarks.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It feels like someone went on a bit of an investigation.
And then this happened.
Yeah.
I mean, it certainly wasn't the longest one.
That was the one about the walking, but, you know,
let's not throw stones.
None of us even considered that. No. Maybe we should. That's ridiculous one about the walking, but you know, let's not throw stones. None of us even considered that.
No, it's not the walk. That's ridiculous.
If it is, I will punch Matt
if that's true.
Not hard. It's sad. I feel
sad to know that I wrote it now because I would have
loved to see you get punched.
Well, let's go through the answers.
Saran did write that one.
I'm sorry, Saran. I didn't mean to.
For six weeks. I loved it. You love that write that one. I'm sorry, Soren. I didn't mean to. For six weeks.
I loved it.
You love that you're not getting the thrashing of a lifetime.
Yeah.
I mean, I wouldn't give you, I would give you like a little,
like a sort of a dead arm or something like that.
I'd give you a little Charlie horse.
A little cork.
A Charlie horse, yeah.
I think I just like that Soren's having a bit of fun.
Well, Ben is writing the most serious answers I've ever seen in my life um and then can you reckon that was serious i think you should punch him i think
that well which one did ben right uh falling asleep on the train that was also written by the
house when i said that was also written by the house uh that was the first one i'd said about
the house so the also was not right there but uh winning on Jeopardy, that was also written by the house.
Then we had Falling Down a Well.
That was written by Dave Warnicke.
But you were right to ask that great question.
Had you considered six weeks in the well?
It was six weeks in the well in my mind.
Absolutely.
He's still in that well to this day.
But he was playing.
He might have.
It's a great picture.
I just threw it up.
Dave, the one you went for, The Blood Parasol
It was written by Ben Russell
I got you
Thank you so much
I think it's such a great answer
I've been watching a lot of
Like my kind of
Put on when you don't want to look at anything
Sort of thing at the moment is like
Cave diving stuff
On YouTube
That stuff gives me panic attacks Yeah, well I think it is because it's so terrifying sort of thing at the moment is like cave diving stuff on YouTube.
Oh, that stuff gives me panic attacks.
Yeah, well, I think it is because it's so terrifying.
And there are a lot of sort of underground cave networks in sort of all over the United States.
Right.
So they brought that into it.
And I wanted to go a little bit more serious this time
because I want to keep you guys guessing.
You know, what's my voice now?
You don't even know.
Okay.
What's Ben?
I'm not going to settle on one sort of tone.
So the next five questions aren't going to be all about blood-borne parasites.
I don't think so.
I don't even know if you can because you're all in one sort of strapped
in one unit.
I don't think you can get a blood parasite.
I mean, you'd have to try pretty hard going Cape Town because you've got
your oxygen.
Dave,
you sound like a fool now that I know that detail. I was
assuming that he'd cut his hand on a
rock. Yeah, maybe.
The key place to get a blood-borne parasite
would be a well.
Yeah, I think so. A well.
Stagnant water.
If you're in the well for six weeks.
Like the time down there.
That's where you're cutting it.
I'm going to say it, okay?
Sorry if this is going to offend you, but I think parasites are bad.
Okay.
Well, you know, we've got-
All parasites are bad.
Ben, I should just say that about 30% of our listenership are parasites.
And I locked my answer in for them.
It's all that representation.
So that means the correct answer is he ruptured a tendon
in his pitching hand playing too much Guitar Hero.
That is wild.
You are winning, Saren.
Yeah.
That's crazy.
I don't need to worry about tone.
I'll just get the answers right.
See, I am.
Maybe I'm overthinking it.
In fact, Ben, you got two points that round
because Dave guessed your answer as well.
In your face, Saran.
So the score is Dave on no points, but in the lead on two points,
it's Ben, the house, and Saran.
Yes!
Let's not forget I'm winning this golf match.
That is true.
I'm not stepping foot.
Yeah.
So that brings us to question number three,
which was written by Orla from Dublin in Ireland.
And the question is,
what was English snooker player Anthony Hamilton's nickname?
What was English snooker player Anthony Hamilton's nickname?
While you're writing your answers,
I'll let the audience know a bit more about Zemeja and his injury.
According to sportscasting.com,
I'll let the audience know a bit more about Zemeja and his injury. According to sportscasting.com, Zemeja said on 97.1,
the Ticket podcast in 2019, quote,
my hand just flared up on me, the right hand, the thumb.
I couldn't grip the baseball.
I couldn't throw the baseball.
He continued, the guitar hero had just come out,
and I fell in love with that game, dude.
I'm a rock and roll fan.
It's a killer game. Hell, I'm going to buy this in love with that game, dude. I'm a rock and roll fan. It's a killer game.
Hell, I'm going to buy this.
Guess I got hurt, dude.
Guitar Heroes makers ended up taking care of Zemea.
They treated me very well, he said.
In a later, he doesn't specify how, in a later version,
the video game also had a disclaimer.
No pictures were harmed in the making of this game except for one.
Joel Zemea. He had it coming. According pictures were harmed in the making of this game except for one. Joel Zemea.
He had it coming.
According to the Detroit News.
You guys ever played a video game so much that it hurt?
Ben, you're a bit of a gamer.
I have been known to game.
No, I've never done that.
You've never like gone, my thumbs are on fire.
I like to keep not that immediate pain but sort of like lifetime regret.
Yeah, okay.
Your fingers are absolutely destroyed.
The answers are in.
Oh, yes.
Let's do it.
Here is question number three.
What was English snooker player Anthony Hamilton's nickname?
Mr. Holes.
The Sheriff of Pottingham.
Yep.
That's very English.
Tony Pockets.
Yep. The Blackpool Brawler. Yep. That's very English. Tony Pockets.
Yep.
The Blackpool Brawler.
Dinner and a Show or Dick.
Okay, a few hole or corner pocket based ones there, which I think they do have in the game.
Yeah.
You're thinking Dick Hole?
Yeah.
Dick Hole. I bet if it was Dick Hole, I was hole? Yeah. Dick hole.
I bet if it was dick hole, I was going to be like.
Mr. Holes, the Sheriff of Pottingham, Tony Pockets,
the Blackpool Brawler, Dinner and a Show.
Dinner and a Show.
Dinner and a Show, fantastic.
Blackpool Brawler.
The Blackpool.
I love dinner and a show.
That'd be a great nickname.
That is such a great nickname.
Because it's like he's got everything.
Yeah, he's got it.
It's dinner and a show.
Yeah, I feel full watching this man.
Yeah.
I'm going to watch it.
He gets.
Eat a lot of soup?
And some stew.
And some stew.
So, okay, Sheriff of Pottingham, we know in England their culture is puns.
They do.
They love a pun.
And you know what else is their culture?
Rubbing hood.
Yes, they love that.
That's their whole culture.
One, two.
That's their whole fucking identity.
To put it in a context for Australians, he's sort of like their Ned Kelly.
Yeah, except Ned Kelly killed more cops.
Oh, no, Sheriff was a cop.
They both killed cops.
Yeah.
Yeah, one was a fox.
Yeah, Ned Kelly.
Yeah, he was a babe.
He was such a babe.
He was such a babe.
I think that it's Mr. Holes.
Mr. Holes.
And his name is Anthony, right?
Anthony, that's right.
So Tony Pockets, that makes sense.
Tony Pockets.
Yeah, I'm Tony Pockets.
It's me, Tony Pockets.
I'm ready to sink some bloody bones.
I think that I'm going to applaud the work of Sheriff of Pottingham Sheriff of Pottingham for Dave
I'm going to do
Okay, so you've got Tony Pockets
Mr. Holes
Oh, you've got Mr. Holes
You've got Sheriff of Nottingham
Okay, that leaves Dick
Tony Pockets And the Blackpool Brawler.
And Dinner and a Show.
And Dinner and a Show.
I don't think it's Dinner and a Show.
I want it to be Dinner and a Show, but I don't think it is.
Dick makes no sense.
You don't know him.
Maybe that's what we're looking for
Maybe that's what we want
I mean they are English
Yeah
They're not
Built to make sense
Nothing about English people
Makes sense
Oh you want peas
We're gonna mush them up
Put them
With a pie
That's weird
That's what makes no sense
I know you would be in
Because you're into pies
But
Objectively it is strange.
I find it strange the fish and chip pea combo.
Yeah.
They put peas with everything.
And I'm going to say peas aren't that good to be put with everything.
I don't mind a pea.
I'm not saying I hate peas.
I think peas have their place,
but I just don't think I would Englishify them
and put them on literally every single thing.
Because they're not salt.
No. Salt is the thing you put on everything. Yeah, you're right. single thing. Because they're not salt. No.
Salt is the thing you put on everything.
Yeah, you're right.
Peas.
Peas, get out of here.
Salt on peas?
Well, you've got to give them flavour somehow.
Some sort of flavour.
I honestly think it's just a colour thing because otherwise
everything they've got is beige.
That is true.
Yeah, yeah.
It's just a little bit of green.
But when it's done in a certain way, it fakes out to look like avocado
and it's so disappointing if you think you've got avocado on toast.
It turns out to be peas.
It's peas.
It's just like I like peas.
But when they're mushed up, they've lost all their flavour.
I've never been tricked by a pea masquerading as an avocado.
I can always tell. Your biggest claim. I've never been tricked by a pea masquerading as an avocado. I can always tell.
Your biggest claim.
Yeah, yeah.
I've never been tricked by a pea.
What?
Blackpool Brawler I'm going to go with.
I want to go with Tony Pockets, but I'm going to go with Blackpool Brawler.
You can go with what you want to go with.
That is an option.
No, no.
You force me.
You force my hand and I'm going with Blackpool Brawler.
Okay.
Well, here is who wrote the answers.
Dick.
That was written by Ben Ruffles.
It's Dick.
Everyone had finished and I'd.
You have changed the tone of each answer.
Each answer I'm trying to change and keep you going.
Dinner and a show was Dave.
That's fantastic.
Such a good nickname. It's a great nickname. I thought you'd go for it. I was like, I's fantastic. Such a good nickname.
It's a great nickname.
I thought you'd go for it.
I was like, I've got to get a point here.
This is believable.
Then you're like, it's not that.
But you appreciated it.
Because I wasn't expecting everyone to be so filled
with pool-related stuff.
Right.
So I thought Dick would be a less sticky outie.
And the same with Dinner and a Show.
But everything else was.
The Dick really did stick out.
The Dick stuck out and you don't want that.
Tony Pockets, that was written by Saran.
You know when I wrote it.
Tony Pockets is so good.
I was imagining Ben doing that exact impression.
Of Tony Pockets. That's why I was imagining Ben doing that exact impression. I'm Tony Pockets.
That's why I wrote it.
Here we go.
Sometimes you just tell them to win this game.
I'm Tony Pockets.
It feels right.
Yeah, him winning the match and then yelling, Tony Pockets.
Tony Pockets.
You thought you could beat Tony fucking Pockets. Who do you think you are? I'm Tony Pockets! You thought you could beat Tony fucking Pockets.
Who do you think you are?
I'm Tony Pockets!
Mr. Holes.
That was written by the house.
I like it.
Yeah, Mr. Holes is good.
And gross.
That was written by, I think, all the questioner wrote that one.
Excellent work.
Fantastic.
Beautiful.
The Blackpool Brawler.
That was written by me.
The house, I'm afraid, Ben.
Good one.
I mean, the correct answer was the Sheriff of Cottingham.
They can't resist over there.
It's their culture.
That's like he got nicknamed that in the Daily Mirror once
and everyone's like, well, there we go.
He didn't like it.
Yeah, he didn't come up with it himself.
And, yeah, he's like, just stuck, so, you know.
He's like, I want it to be called Dinner on the Shelf.
Yeah.
I want it to be called Dick.
I watched an interview where he was talking about the origin of it
and he's like, you know, I don't mind it so much now because I'm
from Nottingham and I don't live there now but it's nice for people
to know I am from Nottingham.
Well, it makes sense then.
Yeah.
A bit lame though.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But, you know.
But I think when it comes to lame, nothing's off the table.
Yeah, that's true.
For English nicknames.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Bit of fun.
Do people know he's from Nottingham though?
I reckon a few people think he's from Pottingham.
I thought he was from Blackpool.
Yeah, that's true.
I reckon if anyone knows him,
I think they should get on him about some other suggestions for nicknames.
Tony Pocket.
Tony Pocket.
Come on.
I was thinking that that was you, Matt, because Tony Lockett,
Tony Pocket.
That's what you've got.
There's only Tony Pockets.
You're famous for loving this and killed the football team.
Yeah, I love Plugger.
Yeah.
What a man.
Oh, Plugger plugs the hole with the balls.
Oh, my God.
They could have called him Plugger.
Damn it.
Plugger's a good nickname.
We're up to question number four.
This one comes from Matt Rowe from Stanmore in New South Wales.
Matt Rowe, Stanmore, beautiful place.
In 2019, Ranker.com voted an obscure character
as the most ridiculous comic book character of all time.
What was their name and what was their special ability?
In 2019, Ranker.com voted an obscure character
as the most ridiculous comic book character of all time.
What was their name time what was their
name and what was their special ability while you're writing your answers here's a little bit
more information about anthony tony pockets hamilton according to snooker hq.com anthony
hamilton has been one of snooker's longest serving pros on the main tour beginning his career as a
professional in 1991 as time time passed and Hamilton's
tenure in the elite bracket came to an end, he was granted the undesirable moniker of being the best
player to have never won a ranking title. But redemption finally came 26 years after he debuted
as a pro in the 2017 German Masters,
after beating a star-studded field to land that elusive piece
of silverware at the age of 45.
Originally from Nottingham, he was affectionately nicknamed
the Sheriff of Pottingham and the Robin Hood of Snooker.
So just to follow that sort of metaphor or allegory
or whatever you want
to say it is, did he rub from the rich?
Yeah.
So did he steal balls from rich guys and give those balls to the poor?
But they've also nicknamed him the hero and the villain.
Yeah, so Sheriff of Pottingham means that he was rubbed of balls
by himself. By the Robin Pot. Yeah, so Sheriff of Pottingham means that he was robbed of balls by- Himself.
By the Robin Pot.
He was both of them.
Robin Putt.
Robin Putt.
Potting Hood.
So Potting Hood, sell him because he's obviously the, you know,
the son of Loxley.
Robin of Loxley and his father was killed in the Crusades.
Oh, my God, you're right.
And so he comes back from – oh, no, is his father killed in the Crusades?
I forget.
Yeah, I think so.
I'm only going off my memory of Men in Tights.
Yeah, right.
I'll go forth Prince of Thieves.
Prince of Thieves is probably what I was actually thinking of.
So while Robin was away, having an American accent,
getting an American accent.
Yeah, he was away for quite a while in America.
Yeah, in America on the Crusades.
A lot of people know that.
No.
Some people don't even think the country of the United States was around back then, but it was.
It was.
Along with the accent.
Yeah.
While you're still writing your answers, let's go for a quick break all right so the answers are in here is question number four
in 2019 ranker.com voted an obscure character as the most ridiculous comic book character of all
time what was their name and what is their special ability? Super Savings Man. A super powerful, super thrifty superhero.
He'll save the day as long as there aren't any costs involved.
Mummy Steve.
A modern man turned into a mummy who could stink up the place so bad
that no one could stand being around him.
The Vancouver Child Kicker.
She used her super strong leg to kick children into those she deems
as bad parents.
Sorry.
So she kicks the kids or the parents?
The kids into the parents.
Okay.
Great.
Did you confirm?
The big bowl.
A salad bowl with legs that speaks exclusively in limericks.
A salad bowl with legs that speaks exclusively in limericks.
That guy from the Crazy John ad selling mobiles for an affordable price.
Rip.
Yeah, really.
He's gone.
Crazy John dead.
Too soon.
Do you think that's who this is?
Do you think that guy from the Crazy John ad is Crazy John?
He's dead.
He was too crazy.
But maybe once he was in comic book form.
Ah, yes.
And you live on forever when you're in comic book form.
Exactly.
Even if you are voted the most ridiculous.
Some say you live on forever if you're in podcast form.
That's true too.
Immortality.
We live on in the cloud.
Have you still listened to this in the year 5000?
Hello.
Beep boop.
And your final option, dog welder.
He welds dead dogs to villains' faces.
It's very difficult to weld, but I appreciate the effort there. So you've got Super Savings Man, Mummy Steve, the Vancouver Child Kicker,
the Big Bowl, that guy from the Crazy John ad, or Dog Welder.
Oh, my gosh, they're all so bad.
Remembering this, it was voted as the most ridiculous comic book character
of all time.
Okay, can I talk it out as well?
Yeah, let's raise it.
I think the first two feel the best.
I think I'm going to go with with super savings man because in a similar vein
of like remember dolomites in australia yes like they put in these comics and they had little
comics and oh we're fucking trying to it's basically just banks grooming children to
fucking get in there and get in get in debt and they got a little fucking i stuck with them for
until like three years ago because of that
yeah i'm still with still with them from yeah exactly see it works yeah so super savings man
it could be like i bet you it's like a chase you know banks right you're not seeing them in a marvel
or a dc i'm saying that they probably are marvel like they probably get like chase bank or one of
those guys probably gave them a bunch of money.
Because they used to have some ridiculous ones.
Yeah.
Because you get those funny ones,
you know, so
like the Deadpool, who's probably
my favourite comedian.
So
I guess I would, yeah, I'm
tempted to more go with those ones.
Bowl is good.
Yeah, I think I'm going to go with the bowl.
You're going to go with the bowl?
Big bowl.
Big bowl is good.
You said the first two.
What was the second one?
Mummy Steve.
Mummy Steve is also fucked up.
Ben Trout, that's very convincing.
Mummy Steve.
Mummy Steve is fucked up.
Okay.
And then we had Dog Welder.
We had Crazy John. And there's one Okay. And then we had Dog Welder. We had Crazy John.
And there's one more.
And then Bird Can Be Covered.
Vancouver Child Kicker.
Yeah, that kicks kids into parents.
But that's good because it's specific as well.
Yeah.
It's got a specific thing.
They're all, yeah, it's difficult.
This is a hard one.
Because they're all so ridiculous.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I believe, yeah, fuck.
Are you going with savings?
I'm going to go with savings, but I wouldn't mind going with Vancouver, mum,
because I like that specificity.
Whoever did that got me through with the specificity.
I'm a sucker for it.
Terrain?
Bowl.
Bowl?
Bowl for Terrain.
We're going to split the field because I'm going to say Mummy Steve.
Mummy Steve.
Fantastic.
Stinky man.
He's just in the corner.
He's a modern man.
Stinky man.
A modern man.
That's right.
That's very specific.
All right.
Let's go through who wrote the answers.
The guy from the Crazy John ad.
That was Saran.
Did you know he'd passed?
I didn't know he'd passed.
I bet you feel pretty bad now.
I feel like that's a beautiful
tribute to him.
Now he is immortal. Crazy John, is that the
I'm excited? I'm excited.
That's Big Kev.
Big Kev is dead. Wait, so which one?
Are they both dead? To be honest, I kind of got
them confused.
So maybe Crazy John's alive?
If he is, what a relief.
Ken Bruce, I think he's still kicking.
He's gone mad.
He's still alive.
Franco Cozzo's still around.
Yeah, he's still going strong.
He'll live out in the view.
TV doesn't really have these sort of characters anymore.
Oh, you've got, hello, Frank Walker National Tower. Oh, you've got Hello, Frank Walker National Tales.
Oh, he's still around.
He's still around.
Frank's still.
Yep.
You know, you used to have those Hello, Hello Gardeners.
Oh, yeah.
Chris Amari.
Chris Amari's Plant Farm.
Yeah.
Anyway, the Vancouver Child Kicker, that was written by the house.
Oh, well done.
Yeah, no, that was good.
So Matt Rowe came up with the name.
I just gave it the backstory.
He was a Stan Lee going, here's a character name.
Just draw it and make it.
Stan Lee just wrote down a thousand character names
and sent it in an email once.
Spider-Man.
Marvel lady.
Super Savings Man. that was also the house
oh good one
Mummy Steve
Dave that was Ben
no I loved it
I wanted to be
I love it
Mummy
Stinky Mummy
Mummy Steve
yeah just stinky
very funny
just stinks
I absolutely can see him
in a comic
you should make it a character
of the big bowl Sar, that was Dave.
Of the Big Bowl.
Meaning the correct answer was Dog Welder.
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
No one expected that one.
No.
That's so grim.
Is he killing the dogs first?
Yeah.
See, because that's not fun.
I think the ones we came up with, they're fun.
I mean, I think.
He's not a superhero.
He's a villain.
More so than the villain.
He's an anti-hero apparently.
No, that's a villain.
Is his final act to weld a dog to his own face?
Oh, yeah, maybe.
In a moment of realisation.
I shouldn't say that he kills a dog.
I don't know.
I'd like to just obsequiatulate here and say that I don't think that means
that they're a hero, superhero.
I think that's what makes them an anti-hero because they're, you know.
Because they're a piece of shit.
Yeah, because they're, no, no.
I'm upset for the villains.
Yeah, yeah.
Some of them might be allergic.
What a punishment.
I'm upset with the wording.
You're right.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, if you're allergic and it's welded to your face, what a nightmare.
That's not fair.
Yeah.
Gone too far.
So that's one point to Dave, one point to Ben, one point to the house.
Quick score update.
On two points we have Dave and Saran.
On three points it's Ben, but out in front on five points it's the house.
Wow.
We're being dominated, boys.
The house always wins.
The house always wins.
Damn it.
All right, we're up to question number five. The house always wins. Damn it. All right.
We're up to question number five.
This one comes from Jackie Parsons from Perth.
And the question is, which of these is a real species of fish?
So basically you've just got to make up a fish species.
Okay.
While you're writing your answers, here's some more info about Dog Welder from CBR.
Created by Steve Dillon.
And he first appeared in Garth Ennis and john mccray's hitman
number 18 this is a dc comic after trapping stray dogs in alleyways oh no he does kill them oh my
god his favored way of dealing with criminal scum is to take the dead bodies of these dogs
and weld them to crooks faces it's unknown how exactly this would permanently disable an opponent
though the shock would certainly surprise even the toughest of enemies.
Dogwelder's face is never shown and he's always seen in his signature welding gear.
Likewise he simply goes by Dogwelder throughout the entire series, lacking both a civilian
name and any civilian dialogue.
This along with the arguably inhumane lengths to which he goes to to combat evildoers make even his fellow teammates on Section 8
question his sanity.
So is he named as the worst character?
Most ridiculous.
Most ridiculous, right, because I would say worst as well.
I hate him.
I hate him too.
I think he gets super savings man to kill him.
He's definitely a villain.
Yeah, for sure.
Way worse than criminal scum.
I would set Mummy Steve on team.
Yeah.
Stink it up, Steve.
I'd say the big bowl could take care of him.
All right, the answers are in.
Here is question number five.
Which of these are the real species of fish?
Real fish.
Brown dick minnow.
The Basque Willie
Mexican Walking Fish Taco
Farley's Pika
Creek Chub Sucker
or the Fingerless Glove Fish
Brown Dick Minnow
The Basque Willie
Mexican Walking Fish Taco
Farley's Pika
Creek Chub Sucker
or the Fingerless Glove Fish
One of these is a real Do you say taco, Farley's pika, creek chub sucker, or the fingerless glove fish.
One of these is a real.
Did you say creek chub sucker or creep chub?
Creek.
Creek. Creek chub sucker.
Creek chub sucker.
Fuck, they could all.
I mean, fish are.
There's so many of them, you know.
They're going to keep coming up with names.
Can I say that there are too many fish?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I agree.
Oh, the dog lovers are also fish heads.
Big surprise.
People say there are plenty of fish in the sea.
Yeah, too many.
Too many fish.
Gosh.
That's the problem.
If that guy's welding fish to people's faces, I'd be applauding him.
Take him out.
And that's why, you know, Rio Tinto are good for setting off huge amounts
of explosions underwater
because there's too many fish and they're like,
we've got to get rid of them all.
Yeah, I think they should start machine gunning the water at random.
Take that, you fucking fish bastards.
I'm going to need them all again.
I'm so sorry.
Yeah.
Brown dick minnow. That's a good one. I'm just going to need them all again. I'm so sorry. Yeah. Brown dick minnow.
That could, that's a good one.
I'm just going to go.
I'm going to think that could be one.
Yes.
The Basque willy.
Also could be one.
Mexican walking taco fish.
No, fish taco.
No, no, no.
That's ridiculous.
Barley's pika.
Yep.
Should be.
Creek chub sucker.
Yep.
The fingless glovefish.
Yes.
I'll say yes.
You think the Fingless Glovefish more likely than the Basque Willie?
Yeah.
Love that.
And I think you're right too.
I don't know anything.
Don't listen to me.
I like to think Creek.
Was that a cheat?
Were you trying to steer us in the right direction?
No, no.
Or the wrong direction.
Remember I'm in the game as well.
Creek.
Winning the game.
You don't know. Do you know the answers though? Yeah, I do know the game as well winning the game You don't know
do you know the answers though?
Yeah I do know the answers
So you just
What is that?
What was that comment?
I could have been bluffing
double bluffing
What the fuck was that comment?
I don't know
I think he's trying to steer us
You can't trust the house at all
I'm wily
I like the idea of the creek
chub sucker
Sweet
In the way that you're going to lock it in?
Well I'm often at a creek
and I have myself a chub
And Okay What's happening? What's the third part? Sweet. In the way that you're going to lock it in? Well, I'm often at a creek and I have myself a chub.
Okay.
What's happening?
What's the third part?
You're looking for a fish, namely the? Yeah, the fingerless glove.
What are you thinking, Ben?
He's got me all turned around.
He's played mind games.
I think I would actually like to see this whole round disqualified.
Stricken from the record.
Because he has poisoned the water.
Yeah, sorry about that.
Which we should do for the fish.
Which we should do for the fish.
That's funny.
Normally I'm more helpful than not because I don't really enjoy winning.
But I don't know why.
But you're loving winning.
But see, you're saying you're not being helpful, so that was wrong.
Well, I don't know now.
So maybe we should go Basque Willie.
But then Fingal's Glovefish could be real.
Maybe he was genuinely helping.
Maybe it's something that maybe we're completely wrong
and it's like Dick Minnow.
Yeah.
Honestly, please forget what I said.
No, I can't.
Okay.
You can't take it back.
Okay.
It's in there.
All right, Matt.
We'll read them out and then you wink at the correct one, okay?
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
He's winking.
I haven't even started reading that's a
blink that's a blink bask willie bask willie chub sucker he's oh my god he's blinking oh is that a
wink or a blink farley's peeker i think i'm gonna go with the dick minnow please i'm gonna go with
bask willie oh actually i don't know wait bask Willie was your first. That was the first one you were like, no, it's definitely not.
Yeah.
But I'm going for it.
Oh, okay.
I'm going for it because the seeds of dissent have been put into my mind.
He's playing mind games with me.
Is it a bluff?
Is it a double bluff?
Is it a triple bluff?
Fine.
That's it.
I'm changing to fingerless glove, which I thought was the most ridiculous one.
So if you're going topsy-turvy, I'm going topsy-turvy. Okay, great. I'm going to say the least likely one. You're saying Bask Willie. I'm saying fingerless glove, which I thought was the most ridiculous one. So if you're going topsy-turvy, I'm going topsy-turvy.
Okay, great.
So the least likely one, you're saying basketball,
I'm saying fingerless glove.
Just know that if I don't get this right,
I'm going to kick up a stink.
Okay?
All right, let's go through who wrote.
I'm going to kick up a stink.
I'm going to call for the whole game to be disqualified
and us to all win.
Okay.
I'm happy with that.
I hope you get it wrong.
You will, yeah.
I really hope you get it wrong.
That's the only chance we ever win. It's been kicking up a stink. I'm going with that. I hope you get it wrong. You will, yeah. I really hope you get it wrong. That's the only chance we ever win.
It's been kicking up a stink.
I'm going to be stinking.
Here's who wrote the answers.
Brown Dick Minnow, that was written by The House.
Oh, wow.
In particular, Jackie, the question writer,
which nearly had all of you at one point.
Lovely work.
Then we had Mexican Walking Fish Taco.
That was also The House. That was taco. That was also the house.
That was me.
That was a reference to Dave.
That was silly, stupid and infantile.
Well, we try and throw one in that you're not going to pick.
I think it was disgusting.
It was just a waste of time.
Farley's Pika.
That was Ben Russell.
That's an absolute ripper of a name.
Yeah, Farley's Pika.
There was a fucked up like golden trevally. Yeah, Farley's Peeker. I forgot about that.
There was a fucked up golden trevally.
Yeah, a trevally.
Golden rainbow trevally.
Farley's Peeker.
I love it.
Farley's Peeker's got in there.
Oh, my God.
Can we just point out, I've just noticed that Ben Russell
is wearing a shirt with a fish on it.
Oh, my God.
That's true.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, and it says on it, ocean is a fuck.
Kill them all. It does say kill them all. Oh, my, a fuck. Kill them all.
It does say kill them all.
Oh, my, it does say kill them all.
You're really pushing your agenda here, Russell.
Yeah, well, it's mainly just dead carps.
I'm against carps invading our waterways.
Invasive carps.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay, fair enough.
I actually love fish.
They're making it hard for me.
And marine life.
For Farley's Pika.
We did an episode of Do Go On a couple of years ago about this guy,
this English migrant to New Zealand who smuggled English fish species in
and spread them to all the New Zealand waterways,
and they're still like they got out of control.
And he was arrested.
They tried to stop him so many times, and he kept just spreading the fish.
He liked fishing for them.
That's crazy.
What is he called?
The New Zealand's fish terrorist.
That's an understatement.
There are perfectly good fish in New Zealand.
Also, he likes fishing.
He had to go get them from somewhere.
Yeah.
Just stay there.
Did he go to jail?
I don't think so.
He got real old.
He fucking well should.
His car, he turned into like a portable fish aquarium
and his petrol station that he ran he it was just like the back end was just all it is fish eggs a
wild story he saw it as a class struggle thing because he grew up like because apparently
legally they were adding salmon and stuff to the waterways which was seen as you know like rich
people fishing stuff and he grew up poor in eng England and he'd fish for these little tiddlers
and stuff in puddles.
So he tried to bring them in thinking that he was, you know,
doing it for the everyman but really it was just.
He wasn't thinking about the fish though, was he?
No.
He didn't give a shit.
No.
It was thousands.
It was a really grim story.
I read that man.
You can do something for everyman but you can but it won't be good for the fish.
That's right.
It's classic English going, oh, let's make it more like England.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, it's a horrible place, isn't it?
Let's make every place like that.
The Basque Willie, which Ben picked.
Dave wrote that one.
Yeah, you fuck.
You fuck.
Kick up a stick.
Come on.
I'm sorry.
I didn't want to be part of that.
It's not your fault.
I didn't want to be part of that.
It's not your fault.
It is Matt's fault.
He planted the seeds.
Which one were you going to go for, though?
I was going to go for, what was the one?
Brandick Minnow.
I was going to go for Fingalist Glove.
The Fingaless Glove fish
was written by Saran
thank goodness
because that would have been
controversial
well done Saran
meaning Saran was correct
it was the Creek Chub Sucker
god damn it
that means two points
for Saran
one point for Dave
okay
sorry Ben
that was not
honestly those points
should be struck from the record
I wish that I could
weld Matt's face
onto your face
and you tell me sorry.
Oh, why am I being punished?
No, because I want Matt to apologise.
But it would be Matt's face.
I want a written apology.
I did regret that as soon as I started talking.
Can you please?
I won't do that again.
Do you have a Patreon?
Yeah, yeah.
Can you write a written apology and post it on that Patreon?
Okay.
Can do.
Yeah, thank you.
You won't be able to see it, but I can.
No, but you can post it maybe on your other
socials for this. Okay, yep. No worries.
We'll do that.
Just like a written apology.
When this episode comes out, someone
probably needs to tweet me saying, can you apologise to Ben
and I'll reply to that with an apology. No, no, no.
I'm not going to remember.
I want you to draft one up
ready to post. Alright, I can do one up. Okay. Ready to post.
All right.
I can do that.
Before the next question.
Yeah.
We'll wait.
The scores have tightened up.
And don't edit it out.
Scores have tightened right up now on three points.
It's Dave.
On three points, it's Ben.
On four points, it's Saran.
And just in front on five points, it's the house.
Anyone's game here.
Close game. Yeah. I mean, it's the house. Anyone's game here. Close game.
Yeah, I mean, it's close if you don't mind cheaters,
which is kind of what the house has been doing.
So basically the only difference here is that Saran would have had one more point
and Dave would have had one less point.
Yeah, you would have had one less point as well.
I wouldn't have had any less points.
Yeah, you would.
Question number six is.
This game sucks, man.
Why?
It fucking sucks.
What was this?
Oh, sorry.
I should say this one comes from Andy Conduit Turner from Perth in Scotland.
Oh, we had a Perth Western Australian, a Perth in Scotland.
Yeah.
Beautiful.
Well, just like you were saying, British people, Scottish and English
are obviously very different.
Yeah.
Very different. Yeah, well, yeah, yeah.
I would never put British people and Scottish people in the same thing.
I love Scottish people.
I know, but I mean technically they are British, right?
Oh, yuck.
Could someone sort this guy out, please?
You are going to be writing so many written apologies after this episode.
Man, I'm actually Scottish.
Stuart's a Scottish name, okay, so.
Well, then you're a traitor.
But they obviously, Scottish people came to Perth and said,
oh, let's name it after home.
I'm sure they also put a few fish in the rivers.
The mighty swan.
In the mighty swan river.
So Andy's question is, why was the 5th of July 1996 a notable day?
5th of July 1996. Yeah day? 5th of July 1996.
Yeah.
As it was written by a Scottish person.
Ben, can you read it as he would have written it?
Why was the 5th of July 1996 a notable day?
Brilliant.
Thank you so much.
And while you're writing those answers, let me tell you more about creek chub suckers.
According to Jackie, the question writer, the creek chub sucker is a freshwater fish of the sucker family.
It is believed that the creek chub sucker and other members of the family diverged from minnows at least 50 million years ago.
Both females and males look identical and spawning only takes two to four seconds,
which is quick, even for a fish.
1996.
That's pre-Guitar Hero.
It's pre-9-11.
Different time.
Yeah, it was a simpler time back then, you know.
We got a one-star review on this show for making too many 9-11 jokes.
Oh, really?
How many did you make?
Who gave it?
They weren't jokes about 9-11.
One was there was a question like this and someone wrote the answer 9-11.
Why was the 5th of July 1996 a notable day?
9-11.
You know, the joke is that the answer was clearly wrong.
It wasn't like we're laughing at the tragedy.
Yeah.
This is helping, I'd say.
I'll edit this bit. No. This is helping, I'd say. I'll edit this bit out.
No.
They said they'll stop listening anyway.
Oh, well, that's fine.
Yeah.
As an American, would you be offended by something like that?
No, not at all.
I think you can make jokes about 9-11 because if we can't laugh,
then the terrorists have truly won.
You know what I mean?
Joking and humour is the way that we help process and trauma.
You are a humourist though, aren't you?
I'm a humourist.
I'm an amusologist.
I'm an ideocrat.
I'm a silly billy. I'm a silly Billy.
I'm a satirist.
Love satire.
All right.
Question number six.
Why was the 5th of July, 1996, a notable day?
It was 10 years to the day before some Detroit footballer guy
hurt himself playing guitar.
That was a big day.
I remember that.
He was limbering up.
Where were you. I remember that. He was limbering up. Where were you?
Yeah, I remember.
They actually got the principal to go from door to door
at my primary school.
They came into my prep classroom.
They sat us all down and they said, guys, in 10 years,
something big is going to happen.
Yeah, yeah.
It's funny because he switched codes in between
and started playing baseball.
That was the part that got wrong.
You can't predict the future.
You can't predict the future.
Well, I mean, Michael Jordan switched codes.
Yeah, people do it.
People do it.
Happens all the time.
Some people are talented enough.
I bet you he played music too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He did.
The Spice Girls finished recording their debut album.
The original Pokemon playing cards were released.
Loved Pokemon cards.
A breakthrough in cloning technology happened when Dolly the Sheep was born.
Jensen Johnson made news after he ate his body weight in grapes
before pissing out what tasted like fine wine.
Or 9-11.
Well, that means I can't edit it out.
Without that context, you're a dog.
And I don't mean it like you dog lovers mean it.
It's a compliment.
It took me 15 minutes to write that.
So, Dave, you're a Pokemon fan.
Can you- Also a Spice Girls fan.
Also a Dolly the Sheep fan.
Yeah, there's three ones that I really like in there
and those are the Do's.
I think it's Dolly the Sheep.
Yep.
Locking it in.
No discussion for me.
I won't be swayed.
Okay. Right. Okay. Let's remember that. I won't be swayed. Okay.
Right, okay.
Let's remember that.
He will not be swayed.
Ben, let's talk this out.
I think it's Dolly the Sheep as well because I kind of remember that
and it fits in with that time that Dolly was around.
It's definitely the year.
I feel like the year is spot on.
I feel like the Spice Girls was a little bit before that.
Their debut album, we're talking?
Yeah, debut.
Yeah, I thought that was like-
That was 94 or something.
They weren't big when I was in-
No, I reckon they were big especially-
Get real.
Just because you wrote the Spice Girls, okay.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
They were big, but they didn't just-
They were big for ages.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
They were huge. What about Pokemon cards? Did you guys collect just, they were big for ages. Yeah. Yeah, okay. They were huge.
What about Pokemon cards?
Did you guys collect those?
I was big into them.
96 is early.
I think it's too early.
96 was Tarzos.
But I feel like that maybe these things usually take a while to take off.
Tarzos is different, I guess, because it's, you know, it's chips.
Because I just missed the Pokemon train.
Yes, me too.
I know that it had started.
I was a Tamagotchi.
Yeah, but it was before Pokemon.
They had the other stuff.
I'm just old enough that I just kind of skipped out that gender
in that age bracket where it was interesting anymore.
I would say 98, 99.
But I reckon that it's the kind of thing that was, you know,
big in Japan first.
Pokemon cards.
I'm locking it in.
Pokemon cards for Dave.
Two dollies and a Pokemon, please.
Two dollies.
Two dollies and a Pokemon coming right up.
Let's go through.
Who wrote the answers?
It was ten years to the day before some Detroit footballer
guy hurt himself playing guitar.
That was Soren.
Can't believe we didn't even talk about it.
If you win with this strategy, Seren, it would be wild.
The Spice Girls finished recording their debut album.
That was Dave.
All right, it was me, everyone.
I'm looking it up.
But I just looked it up.
It was 96.
Was it?
Good guess, good guess.
And the album was recorded in 95, 96 and released in 96.
Yes, but it was they finished their debut album.
That's when I kind of was like, oh, no.
But wouldn't they have finished it in 96?
Yeah, that's what it says.
They released it.
No, you just said 95.
They recorded 95 to 96.
So they finished recording in 1996.
You used the wrong logic, but it got you to the right answer.
No, you're right.
And I absolutely, it took me so long.
I wrote about 17
drafts of that one and then i was panicking well i apologize uh 9-11 that was ben russell
ben russell did 9-11 yeah well i just never forget you know being american i remember you're
bringing up anytime you can and i remember everyone in my high school being like saying sorry to me
personally, because I was American.
And I was like, I don't, I have nothing just because you're just doing this
because I'm American.
That's weird.
Anyway, it was a great day.
I'm joking.
Jetson Johnson pissing out wine or something that
tasted like it
that was the house
that's very funny
I assume that was
one of you guys
that's really good
the original
little backhand of that
the original Pokemon
I'm just saying
that was like
that's fresh stuff
that's a compliment
if I'm mistaken
you're writing
who submitted this one
I did yes
oh sorry
I thought this is the Patreon supporter and I was going to say
you're on the level of Ben Russell and Serenja Aymar.
That is a compliment.
Hey, look, I'll take it.
The original Pokemon playing card game being released,
that was the house as well.
Damn.
When was it?
I hadn't even looked that up, but that was October 2096 as well.
Whoa.
What a year, 1996.
1996 was a fucking hell of a year.
That was just a full coincidence.
I didn't look that up either.
So Dave and I just absolutely stumbled upon that,
meaning the correct answer is Dolly the Sheep was born.
Yes.
So one point to the house, one point to Saran, one point to Ben.
Fuck yeah.
So can I just say when you criticise my strategy, Matt,
do you know what my strategy is?
I'm trying to write entertaining answers.
I am dinner and a show. That's what I strategy, Matt. Do you know what my strategy is? I'm trying to write entertaining answers. I am dinner and a show.
That's what I am, yeah.
Yeah, but the amazing thing is you're still in second place
and you're throwing it.
You're not giving yourself.
I know.
I'm trying to.
I'm winning and I'm entertaining.
It's dinner and a show.
What am I?
What am I, Chuck Liver?
Okay, not only did I bring something funny to the table,
but I also did a callback to a previous conversation.
What am I?
What do you think the Detroit footballer guy is?
That's a callback.
I think that's great too, but you can't praise Zoran
and not praise me.
It's not fair.
So going to the final round, the scores are Dave on three points, Ben on four points,
Saran on five points, but still just out in front on six points.
It's the house.
We've got to come together here and not let the house win.
Yes.
You're true.
Since you've been on last day.
I'm going to tell you what I wrote next one.
Yeah, because house cheats, so why can't we?
Let's just all cheat.
Well, fuck the rules.
Let's just kiss.
The only way we'll win.
That's the only way love wins, babe.
So since you've been on last, Dave, the rules have changed now.
Every final round is always triple points.
Triple points in the final round.
So really this is anyone's game.
Is that because of what I did?
Yes.
Is that because of what I did?
This is the Dave Warnke rule.
What did you do, man?
Everyone knows.
It goes on.
Did you kick up a stink?
Yeah.
You went all Mummy Steve, didn't you?
You better believe it.
If you play the perfect round, you can get nine points.
So anyone can win this.
Okay.
Prove it.
And we always finish with a movie synopsis question.
To prove it, you'd have to record alternate endings.
And this one comes from Nathan Lang from Edinburgh.
Oh, Edinburgh.
We've all been there.
We have?
We have.
Beautiful city. Beautiful city. One of my been there. We have? We have. Beautiful city.
Beautiful city.
Beautiful city.
One of my favourites.
Love the chippies.
Oh, yeah.
Love those chippies.
I used to go to the Disco Chippy.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, you know the one that's always Disco Chippy?
It's near the mile.
Just at the bottom of the castle.
Yeah, yeah.
Big Gravy Boys.
Yeah, yeah.
Is it called Big Gravy Boys? No, but I tell Big gravy boys. Yeah, I love the, yeah, yeah. Is it called big gravy boys?
No, but I tell you what, I mean, it's a terrible thing,
but something about the gravy over there that is just so much better.
They don't have the gravy.
All right, so Nathan's question is,
what is the synopsis of the 2018 movie Selfie from Hell?
What is the synopsis of the 2018 movie Selfie from Hell?
And while your answers are being written, here is some more information about Dolly the sheep.
According to Britannica, Dolly was the first clone of an adult mammal produced by British developmental biologist Ian Wilmot and colleagues of the Roslin Institute near Edinburgh in Scotland.
The announcement in Feb 1997 of Dolly's birth marked a milestone in science,
dispelling decades of presumption that adult mammals could not be cloned and igniting a debate concerning the many possible uses and misuses of mammalian cloning technology.
According to Andy, Dolly is named after the great Dolly Parton.
And Dolly, the sheep, not the parton, had six children in her life.
Bonnie, then twins Sally and Rosie, and triplets Lucy, Darcy and Cotton.
All right, the answers are in.
Here's the final question.
What is the synopsis of the 2018 movie Selfie from Hell?
A possessed cell phone manipulates its owner Alex into killing his classmates
by editing photos to make it look like they've done awful things.
Along the way, Alex learns a little bit more about himself,
how to compose a nice photo, and the true nature of humanity.
A man at an amusement park thinks a father with a selfie stick
is taking a photo of him.
After a brief altercation, the father thinks he has smoothed things over,
but over the coming months discovers
the other man holds a serious grudge we've all been there are you taking a photo of me it's like
that um russell crowe movie you know the road rage one except yeah it's selfie rage and then
and the notes from the studio were like we love concept, but it's got to be at an amusement park. Yeah, it's got to be an amusement park.
Okay, they need to be amused.
Teen Angela breaks into an asylum with her friends at midnight
and takes a selfie.
Upon looking at it, she sees a mysterious figure in the distance.
The next day at school, she takes another selfie
and the figure returns, but it's moving closer.
How will Angela and her friends escape this stalking demon from hell? Angela, no.
Just stop taking selfies.
Yeah.
Use the other camera.
But for the youth, that's impossible.
It's Gen Z these days.
They're going to take all the selfies and be real.
That's like asking them not to breathe.
Unbelievable.
Get off your phones all the time. One second. Asking them not to breathe. Unbelievable. You know, get off your phones, you know, all the time.
One second.
Asking them not to breathe would also solve this problem.
You don't have to worry about anything now, lady.
Angela.
Who's called Angela first up?
Well, you've got to remember this is from 2018.
Oh, yeah.
Different time.
Yeah, 2018, that's an Angela time.
When Julia falls fatefully ill her cousin hannah becomes
suspicious of the strange and sudden illness when unusual happenings start taking place in her home
hannah comes across julia's vlog and finds herself immersed deep in a place where terror knows no end
it's more about julia's vlog that one i would call that movie julia's vlog from hell
uh millet brian and lucy are wagging school when they find a selfie stick near the riverbank
but this is no ordinary selfie stick the teenagers must venture to the gates of hell and back to save
the world note they don't actually have to enter hell, just go to the gates. Okay, so wagging means that it's an Australian film?
Which means...
Sounds bad.
Is wagging in Australia...
Australianism, is it?
Wagging is definitely in Australia.
Yeah, there you go.
We have selfies here.
It could be Australian.
I'm not saying we don't have selfies here.
I believe it.
I think selfie, the word, originated in Australia.
Yeah, it feels like an Australianism.
Selfie?
Yeah.
No, because then it'd be called self-o.
Take a self-o.
Have a self-o, you c***.
You can beep that out, C word that I just did.
I didn't mean the C word.
It was just that I was trying to be Australian.
Yeah, yeah.
And finally, teenage influencer Brittany Rosenbaum struggles to stay on top of the algorithm until she finds a way to blackmail a hitman into taking out her competition.
She signals to the hitman who the next target is by posting a photo with them in the background.
Will Jackson Brent, president of the Computer Club, be able to stop the bloodshed of innocent Instagram models before it's too late?
Along the way, Brittany learns a little bit more
about how to love herself and others.
And her name is Brittany.
Brittany.
Brittany.
Interesting.
And before and after the tea.
The start of that one had me hooked.
I was like, this is a movie I would watch.
Yeah, their last sentence feels like it was a bit of fan service.
Yeah.
Last sentence, I think.
Do you need to hear any of them again?
Are you ready to lock in?
Some of them actually were, like, pretty good pictures, I thought.
Yeah.
Maybe a quick summary if you could?
Yeah.
Okay.
Just with name and a brief gist of what happened.
A pre-seat.
Yeah.
The name for all of them is Selfie From Hell. No, but name is. No, one of them happened. A pricey. Yeah. The name for all of them is selfie from hell.
No, but name is.
No, one of them was called Julia's vlog.
Yeah.
Yeah.
One of them was called Julia's vlog.
So we had Alex who was made to kill from his,
by his possessed cell phone.
Okay.
Angela.
I would call that made to kill. That's cell phone. Okay. Angela. I would have called that Made to Kill.
That's a Steven Seagal movie.
If you could rename them all that would be handy.
We had the teen Angela who broke into the asylum.
Crazy for you.
With the demon coming closer.
Yeah, stop taking selfies.
Then we had Julia's vlog.
Julia's vlog, yep. Then we had theia's vlog julia's vlog yep then we had the
aussie one with the kids wagging school yeah wagon school stop wagging school we had brintney
yep who blackmailed a hitman and learn a little bit more about herself along the way and uh the
amusement park with the selfie stick oh Oh, dad. The angry dad.
The Russell Crowe road rage film in an amusement park.
Set on a ride.
Yeah.
He's gaining on us.
He's in the ride. He'll never catch us.
He's not.
We've got to keep on this ride so we both don't get off.
We got to keep on this ride so we both don't get off.
Actually, kind of think of it.
It's probably the safest place to be.
Yeah.
On the road.
On the road.
When the ride is the safest place to be.
That's the tagline.
Yeah.
When the ride ends, they end.
Yeah.
Fuck.
Oh, chills. Holy fuck.
You got a gift, dude.
Thank you so much.
I'm going to make you famous.
Who wants to lock something in here?
I know we all laughed about Angela.
Yeah, I think it's Angela.
I think it's the selfies in the background, demon coming closer,
and the answer is just stop taking selfies,
but they would never think of that.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
How annoying is it?
It's kind of like The Ring, isn't it, as well?
Just don't watch it. Just don't fucking watch it. Just don't watch it. Yeah. That. Okay. How annoying is it? I mean, that's kind of like The Ring, isn't it, as well? Just don't watch it.
Just don't fucking watch it.
Just don't watch it.
Yeah.
That's true.
If we just threw that tape away.
Just get rid of the tape.
Yeah.
Yeah, just throw it down the well where that woman lives.
Or just smash it.
Put a fucking magnet up next to it or something.
Oh.
Yeah.
It would destroy it.
Yeah, it just clears the.
I've never seen it.
I assume these things would be written into it. You can't destroy it. It always comes back. Tape over it with the Power Rangers movie or something. it. Yeah, it just clears the. I've never seen it. I assume these things would be written into it.
You can't destroy it.
It always comes back.
Take over it with the Power Rangers movie or something.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's got, you turn it on and it's got like an episode of Rage from 2008.
Yeah, Rage.
That's a stroke special.
I thought you were going to say an episode of Raymond.
Raymond loves Rave.
Everybody loves Rave.
Did you take over the ring?
I was about to watch it.
So Dave's going for Angela.
Angela selfies.
I quite like Angela.
Can you read Julia's vlog one more time?
Yeah.
When Julia falls fatefully ill,
her cousin Hannah becomes suspicious of the strange and sudden illness.
When unusual happenings start taking place in her home,
Hannah comes across Julia's vlog and finds herself immersed deep
in a place where terror knows no end.
Imagine someone getting sick and then you become suspicious of them.
There is no selfie referenced in that entire.
Yeah, I don't think she's, I read it as the cousin isn't suspicious
of her cousin but of why she got sick so suddenly.
Right.
But you think she's going, oh, she's faking it.
She's faking it or something like that.
But, yeah, because if it is the selfie thing,
the thing that she discovers on the computer is that the selfie.
A selfie of her with like, you know, a serial killer or something.
And do you call vlogs?
Yeah, the vlog could be in selfie mode, I guess.
Yeah, I mean, it's difficult to vlog when you've got the camera
pointing the other way.
If that's the real one, I've got a big problem with it, okay?
I just think that someone probably didn't read it
and they just got carried away with their own little story.
I think we can all agree a selfie is a still image.
A still image picture.
Yeah, if that's the real one, I'm out.
Then you need, that person who ever wrote that needs
to write a written apology.
Okay.
For the Patreon.
For the Patreon.
Even if it is a Hollywood screenwriter?
Even if it is a Hollywood screenwriter.
We have to get them on the phone.
Okay.
Get them on the blower.
It's JJ Abrams.
I'm going to just go, I don't know. It's to get them on the phone. Okay. Get them on the blower. It's JJ Abrams. I'm going to just go.
I don't know.
It's Angela Lansbury for me.
You're going Angela as well?
Yes.
So Dave.
I'm going to go Angela too.
Oh, we are all in boys.
But if we're wrong, that means the house will get what?
27 points?
Yeah.
See, I think Brittany.
Brittany.
Brittany.
Yeah.
The one who. Brittany is both selfies. I know that I kind of. Brittany. Yeah. The one who.
Brittany is both selfies.
I know that I kind of want to go Angela.
Along the way, Brittany learns a little bit more about how to love herself
and others.
See, I like that.
Okay.
I didn't like that.
Yeah, that put me.
Because it sounded like a synopsis and then it sounded like someone
getting carried away and writing extra.
Like you wouldn't see that on the IMDB.
Fuck.
Sorry.
Sorry to throw this banner in there.
Okay, so there's Julia's vlogs.
Millet, Brian and Lucy.
We have Julia.
Wagons.
We have Angela.
We have Alex.
Sometimes there's a name in it, but this one has,
everyone's got a name and dad.
Selfie dad.
Angry dad.
I'm going to go Brittany. That was my first. I'm gonna go Brittany
That was my first
I'm gonna go with my instinct
Go with your gut
Go with your gut
When I heard that
The first time
My heart sang
Alright well let's go through
Who wrote the answers
A man at an amusement park
Thinks a father with a selfie stick
Is taking a photo of him
That was Dave
David
I would watch that movie
A possessed cell phone Convincing Alex into killing his classmates That was Dave. David. I would watch that movie. A possessed cell phone convincing Alex into killing his classmates.
That was The House with Nathan, the question writer.
Nathan.
A little collab there.
Then we had Millet, Brian and Lucy wagging school, the Aussie flick.
That was by Saran, which I loved it.
I thought it was great.
I loved it too, but wagging.
It's not an American thing.
I like the note on that one that they don't actually ever enter hell,
just go to the gates.
Just the gates.
That's their mission, to go to the gates and back.
Just touch it.
Touch the gates.
Get a selfie.
Take a photo out the front.
Yeah, take a photo.
Teenage influencer Brintney Rosenbaum.
Shit, that means it's not it if we're reading it out now.
That was the house.
That's definitely a typo, Brintney.
And I liked how you committed to the Brittany.
You could have absolutely.
To me, the commitment kind of stuck with me.
And, you know.
Nathan wrote that name and I sort of fleshed out the story a bit.
But I'm like, I like the misspelling.
Maybe that's a Scottish name.
Maybe that's what they call people in Edinburgh.
Then we had the teen Angela breaking into a sign.
That was Ben Russell.
Fuck you guys.
The correct answer was Julia's Vlog.
Julia's Vlog.
That's stupid.
What?
That's stupid.
The only one without a selfie?
Yeah.
That's stupid.
Fuck you.
A vlog is not a still image.
This game is rigged.
All right.
Well, before we do a score check.
Yeah, I don't think it's rigged.
You just got 18 points, my friend.
Okay, it's good.
You were right.
The movie was not good.
It scored 22% from the audience on Rotten Tomatoes,
and the featured review on IMDb says,
really horrible in every regard,
from the terrible score to the painfully bad acting.
I don't wish this waste of time movie on anyone,
lest it be someone that has no concept of what a well-conceived
and thoughtfully made movie is.
This was neither.
All right, so final score.
I don't know why I thought the winner would get nine points.
That's not right, but still.
Six.
Yes. So here are the scores would get nine points. That's not right, but still. Six. Yes.
So here are the scores.
You said 27.
Yeah, because I was thinking, because it's the ultimate,
the max score is nine, but I was like, nine each.
So I was thinking, so 27, which would be funny, Matt,
if the final round always is 27 points.
Yeah, yeah.
Making everything else totally pointless.
On three points, Dave Warnke.
Dave, you're doing a show at the Melbourne Comedy Festival coming up?
Yes, it's called Even Hotter in Real Life.
Please come along.
Also going to be at the Adelaide Fringe Festival.
Ooh, what dates?
March 3, 4 and 5.
I'll be there then.
Oh, great.
Let's hang.
Yes.
In third place on five points, it's Saran.
Oh, great.
Well, that's pretty good.
And you're going to be doing the Adelaide Fringe, I believe.
I am.
My show is called Crazy Wisdom because I picked the name before the rest of the shows.
And it's at the Rhino Room from the 20th of Feb.
And in Melbourne, I'll be there for the whole festival at the Western.
Short for Rhinoceros Rumiceros.
Ah, Rhinoceros.
Rhinoceros.
In second place on nine points, we have The House.
And I should say I'm doing this show,
Who Knew It With Matt Stewart at the European Beer Cafe on Easter Sunday
at 2 p.m.
Please come along to that.
I'm also doing my show Ding in Adelaide with Dave at the same times.
We're on back-to-back.
We're back to see the double.
I'm at the Chinese Museum for the Melbourne International Comedy Festival
as well.
But out in front on ten points, the winner is Ben Russell.
Yes, King.
What a guy.
I won, and that's what this game is about.
Are you smashing?
And you're not doing a show this year at the festival?
I'm doing a one-off special.
Me and Mags are putting together a one-off special with a bunch of guests
and things like that.
It's at Comedy Republic.
It'll be called Election Night, in brackets brackets not at all political satire so it's like an
election night evening with like you would see on television but there's no it's completely political
satire free there'll be no whips about real politics or any reflections upon that it's just
going to be funny actual comedy no offense to people that do do political humor i think you're very smart but you're i don't i can't do that so this is me taking the politics out of politics that'll be
great fun and also for people in australia you've got a a new primetime sketch comedy tv show we're
going worldwide primetime baby very exciting australia hasn't had a mainstream sketch show
in years and the thing about this show is we don't know if it's going to be good.
All the ingredients are there for something to be good.
Good writers, good cast, good crew, good directors, good producers,
everything, you know, but we don't know.
We haven't seen it.
And it could be terrible, in which case I'm sorry.
But if it's good, then you're welcome.
No, but it is very exciting.
And it's coming out in March,
at the end of March, I think.
So good.
Yeah.
People should follow all three of you on social medias.
Is Twitter your best?
Yeah, Ben Russell's.
Yeah, at Seren Comedy on Instagram, please.
Dave Warnocki.
Thanks so much for listening, everybody.
Thanks so much for joining us, you three.
As we're a new show, it'd be great if you could help get the word out there.
Give us a five-star review, why don't you?
And don't forget to look for the written apology from Matt
and the written apology from you or me.
But you won now, Ben.
Surely all those.
We still deserve an apology.
Okay.
I think from you especially.
Dinner and a show.
Win an apology over here.
That's my nickname. Win an apology over here. That's my nickname.
Win an apology.
Stay tuned for after the theme song for a quick episode of Secret Sound.
Cheers for tuning in to Who Knew With Matt Stewart.
And now that you know it, I've been Matt Stewart.
Goodbye.
I'm like, am I doing that?
You like that sound?
That's a brand new sound.
Now that I know what it is Yeah Listeners
While we're waiting for the
The answers to be finished
Guess this secret sound
What do you think this is?
Guess right in
And at the end of the episode,
we'll let you know the answer.
Thanks for listening.
Yes, I'd like to have a go at the secret sound, please.
Yeah, you heard the secret sound.
What do you think the secret sound is sponsored by Magic Nissan?
If you want a Nissan, go get it at one, you fucking idiot.
What do you think it is?
Go get it at one, you fucking idiot.
What do you think it is?
I think it's sort of a bit of a chin rubbing up against a ball sack. A chin rubbing up against a ball sack.
Let's have a listen to it.
And congratulations.
Can I just say you have just won.
A Nissan?
No, $5.
You've won $5 thanks to Magic Nissan.
If you want a Nissan, get a Nissan.
Stop fucking talking about it.
I'm sick to death of it.
Shut up about it.
Plus, you know, there is a car.
There is a wait for new cars these days.
Have you heard about this?
Is it in the news?
I don't know if it's in the news, but it's on the streets.
I don't listen to the news.
I just listen to the news on the streets,
see what people are talking about.
People are saying there's a fucking shortage of cars for new cars
and you're on the wait list for a long time, you know.
I really appreciate you helping fill the time
that Dave is writing this novel.
Yeah, I know.
We know it's going to be the long one is going to be Dave's.
Oh, in 1996 a big pie was made and it got yummed up.
I'm getting really hungry actually.
I'm thinking about what kind of pie I'll be eating after this recording.
Oh, a little reward pie.
Okay, I know that this is a little bit off track,
but I need you.
I'm sorry we're obsquatchulating.
But what's a good pie that I could get in the Melbourne metropolitan area?
When you say Melbourne metropolitan,
you're talking about the suburbs, you need the CBD,
because that's a hard question.
I don't want CBD.
I want, like, the surrounding north and west and inner west.
Inner north, inner west.
Kingsvilles, Yarravilles, Footscray.
Oh, have you been to Pie Thief in Footscray?
Mm-mm.
Oh, fantastic pies.
They do all sorts of stuff that's become more and more common.
They were one of the first people to do the lasagna pie,
which I absolutely like. But they also do like different Asian know, stuff that's become more and more common. They were one of the first people to do the lasagna pie, which I absolutely love.
But they also do like, you know, different Asian curries in a pie.
They'll do like a slow cooked lamb type thing in a pie.
Fantastic stuff. You need to talk to my friend Greg Larson because he was going on and on.
I went to the beach with him the other day.
He was going on and on about he had the best pie he ever had in New Zealand.
Really?
Yeah.
I need to go there.
You need to talk to him about it and go there.
So I think that's pretty important for you.
Let's call him now.
Message him.
Message him now.
Okay.
I'm going to actually send him a message.
As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors,
like high blood pressure developed during pregnancy,
which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke.
Know your risks.