Who Knew It with Matt Stewart - 60 - Evan Munro-Smith, Bec Petraitis and Geraldine Quinn

Episode Date: October 30, 2023

Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features comedians Evan Munro-Smith (Gamey Gamey Game), Bec Petraitis (Twitch's Becness) and Geraldine Quinn (award winning cabaret star)!Check out Matt's stand up special FREE on YouTube: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhESupport the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!See the podcast/Matt live: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/Check out Matt's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/Theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and Logo by @muzdoodles! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh my God, can you believe it? It's the year 2024. It's Melbourne Comedy Festival and we've just moved venues. We're at the Grace Darling now. We had a great run at the Chinese Museum, selling out shows by the end, but now we need you to come over to the Grace Darling and shows are at 7.15. It's going to be so much fun. Love to see you there. Let's have a beer. Use discount code do go on the show's called dry dry at the melbourne international comedy festival then we're going to sydney and brisbane tickets to all that stuff's on sale now and you can find those tickets and details at mattstuartcomedy.com welcome to who knew with matt stuart the show where the guests write the wrong answers. I'm the titular Matt Stewart and our first guest is Twitch's own Beckness. It's Beck Petratus. I clapped myself. I just need everyone to know the clap started over here and I regretted it immediately.

We also have the host of the Gamey Gamey Gaming Show. It's Evan Munro-Smith. Hello. I started that one i tried to say that right i still said it wrong ever and finally this week first time guest it's multi-award winning cabaret star geraldine quinn hi much more multi-award nominated multi-award losing cabaret star ah thanks so much for joining us it's beck's birthday everybody multi-award losing cabaret star. Woo-hoo!

Thanks so much for joining us. It's Beck's birthday, everybody. Yay! So you're going to let me win. Oh, what a beautiful gift. That's the thing about this game is that if we tried, we couldn't let you win, right? You've got to try, though.

Because we don't, unless you just put Beck after each answer. It's like Dash Beck. Happy birthday, Beck. Yes. From Beck. Yes. Pity Beck. Happy birthday, Beck. Yes. From Beck. Yes. Pity answers.

Let's do it. So the way the show works is I ask a relatively obscure trivia question. Our contestants have to write a convincing fake answer. I then read their answers as well as the real one, and I have to guess which one is correct. The first question comes from listener Anya Kouyis from Brunswick, Whanganui in New Zealand. And Anya's question is, what does the word bumfuzzle mean?

What does the word bumfuzzle mean? While they're writing their answers, I'll explain how the scoring works. So you get one point if your fake answer is guessed by the other contestant and another point if you correctly guess the answer. And by the way, I'm also playing as the house. And I've put in two of my own fake answers for each question,

and I get a point for each one of these that our guests choose. So each of us can score up to three points per round, which seems fair, but the probability actually favors me, the house. And the house always wins. Actually, I'm on a pretty... I had like a three-month losing streak, but I think I've had a few wins lately. So it's all turning around for the house.

Anyway, our questions come from our great Patreon supporters, and if you want to submit a question, sign up on any level via patreon.com.au, which is linked in the show notes. Gosh, these two take a long time, don't they, mate? Beck and Evan are just... And you're smashing away with two thumbs. Points for speed for Geraldine.

I've found out that I'm very bad at typing. With two thumbs or with one thumb? With any type. Just words. On a phone specifically. I'm just bad at it. I don't know how I get good at it. I'm like, maybe I should be swiping more, but then it's really inaccurate.

I feel like an old man. I feel like I'm just like not. You need like. Kids can just like. Well, well remember like did you ever learn like a keyboard i had like ultra key was how we learned how to type on things i learned like i did mavis beacon i did mavis beacon teachers maybe you need that for your dumb thumbs now maybe i do that's a good idea every now and he's dumb thumbs so i really liked swiping but then but for some i think my algorithm's wrong or something and it just keeps throwing out the wrong word and every second word I have to just re-switch.

Hey, you have other skills. Very sweet of you to say, Jordan. All right, the answer in for question number one. What does the word bumfuzzle mean? The fine hair on a bumblebee. Colloquial word for the fluffy soft hair that grows anywhere other than the head, especially on the upper lip of teenage boys. To confuse or fluster someone.

A native bird in Scotland. Scottish slang for car exhaust backfire. Or a soft downy coverage on the posterior. You've got... We've got, what have we got? Three soft hair options. That's a lot. We've got two Scottish options.

That seems... And we've got confuse or fluster. So you've got fine hair of a bumblebee, fine hair anywhere but the head, to confuse or fluster someone, native Scottish bird, Scottish slang for a car, exhaust backfire, or soft downy coverage on the posterior. It just immediately, my head goes to bum.

Because the word starts with bum. You're human. You're human. And I'm like bum fluff. But I know bum fluff is a thing. So that's why bum fuzzles feels different. But bum fluff feels more internal. Internal? If you've got internal bum fluff, you need to see a medical professional.

How far does hair go? Is it like an ingrown hair? I mean, all hair is technically internal. It comes out of you. That's true. It just depends on the direction it's going. Yeah, exactly. I just mean, I feel like bum fluff to me is like more around the center of a whole.

What's the rating on this podcast? Whereas I think bum fuzzle feels like the outer cheeks to me. Are we discussing amongst ourselves what we think is right? You can, yeah. Oh, I don't know. We're individually voting, right? Yeah, you're individually voting. Because I know what I want to do.

Oh, you want to lock in? Yeah, I want to lock in the confusion one. See, I was thinking that too. Just because I do think Bex, as the birthday girl, correct. And I'm not just saying that because it's your birthday. I think that the bum is fuzzling us as to the actual. It feels like we're being tricked. Yeah, yeah.

It feels like it's too obvious. Yeah, it's too obvious. And I'm overcomplicating it. In saying that, having two answers from Scotland feels like you're trying to throw us in some weird way as well, which I don't understand. That's so good point. Good point. But that's probably just coincidental, right?

How could it be coincidental? Well, maybe the house already had a Scottish one and then Geraldine threw in a Scottish one. That's true. That could have happened. Why would Matt make up two Scottish ones? Did you put a Scottish one in there? Maybe I did.

I don't know. Now I don't know. I don't know why there are six answers and I thought there was going to be four. I did also think that it's harder to guess. Well, because... I put in two. There's the real one and there's your three.

Why did you put two in? Why did you put in two? It's basically... That's her bum fuzzless. You've over... Whoa. You're over-egging the pudding. The pudding's all eggy now.

Well, if you want to know my logic, and you don't need to, but it's so that I can ensure there's one believable and one funny-ish answer in every round. Oh, right, right, right. Because you didn't trust us to come up with funny ones. Well, you might do three funny ones or you might do three believable ones. Right. Is that what I'm saying?

He knows what he's doing. This is episode 60, all right? It's my first one and I've just swarmed right in and gone, actually, do it this way. It's funny how often that happens. 60 episodes. You still haven't worked out who knew it yet? I'm going to go. That could go in a promo, Evan.

That was very good. I was tossing up between the Confuse one and the Scottish Bird one was my backup. So I'm going to go, if Geraldine's going the Confusing, I'll go the Scottish Bird. Okay. You can go the same, but I'll... Yeah, I just thought for the sake of... For the sake of the game. For fun. Yeah, for fun. Gamey, gamey, game, game. For the sake going the confusing. I'll go the Scottish bird. Okay. You can go the same, but I'll... Yeah, I just thought for the sake of...

For the sake of the game. For fun. Yeah, for fun. Gamey, gamey, game, game. For the sake of the game. Yeah. For the love of the game. The love of the game.

Yep. I just... I feel like I have to go butt fluff. Like, it's the right thing to do. Was that an option? Yeah, the posterior. Oh, yeah. Yeah, no.

Soft downy coverage. Sorry, no, I thought... It's too fancy. I thought you meant the one that was around anything but the head. But it was specifically a bum. Yeah, it was the light hair on a posterior. Right. Which is a lovely way of describing it.

It feels like what would be in dictionary.com. Yeah. They wouldn't say butt hair. So, I don't know. More's the pity. All right. Well, here's who wrote the answers. Fine hair on a bumblebee.

That was Evan Munro-Smith. I thought that would have been a Beck. It does sound like a fanciful, silly thing I'd say. Are you rubbing off on me? I forgot I should have steered you to that, and I didn't. I feel like I was steering you to a Scott. Anyway, it's fine. I'm learning the game still.

But sometimes, you know, if you're steering them to something, you might be steering them away from it's fine. But, you know, it's... I'm learning the game still. But sometimes, you know, if you're steering them to something, you might be steering them away from it as well. And now you've planted that in their heads, which I think is genius play. That's very smart. Scottish slang for a car exhaust backfire. That was the house. Colloquial word for fluffy soft hair.

That was Anya, okay? The house. I mean, good one, Anya. That is what it should be. A bird native to Scotland. Everyone for that. That's Beck. Happy birthday, Beck. Beautiful present.

Now I swayed you to the word Scotland. Welcome to Scotland, idiot. But it's exactly as Evan said. I just happen to have one that was Scottish. That is so weird. I think it's just something about Scotland is, you know, it's like it's England. No one would write England for a game like this, but Scotland's like, it's more interesting. And it's slightly more exotic.

Yeah, it is exotic. And you're like, oh, I could be like, I vaguely know it could be something. Anyway, all my answers are going to be Scotland from now on. Beck, you went for a soft, dandy coverage on the posterior. That was Gerardine Quinn. Oh! Oh, yes. Hello, dictionary.com.

Hello, literature degree. Meaning Gerardine Quinn was correct. It's to confuse or fluster someone. Do I get, like, DOS points? So you get DOS points. I almost did that. You were so close to doing that. Beck gets UN points. Is that the same language? Doesn't matter.

UNO points. You know what? We're global. Okay. We're global. This podcast is global. See. Alright, we're up to question number two. But Geraldine does take a lead into round two. Evan and the house on zero points. Becca, one point.

Geraldine on two points. Question two is, which of these are real species of fish? So you've just got to come up with a fake name for a species of fish. Oh, okay. While you're writing your answers, here's some more info on bum fuzzle. Anya writes, this is a fun word grandparents used to use back in Matt's day. All right, Anya. All right.

Okay, hang on. I don't know. It's my birthday today. I get it. I'm same age now. What am I talking about? Anya puts it in a sentence for us saying, I was building in me shed and went to use my hammer, but it wasn't there

and what it wasn't where i left it i'm feeling bumfuzzled right now i walked around bumfuzzled trying to look for it oh now i get it thank you and yeah it's fantastic all right the answer for question number two which of these is a real species of fish? Curly boy. Squim. Brandenburg eel. Horny head chub. The round mound of flounder. Or Scottish harlow.

Which one's real? What? Scotland's happening again. Scotland's happening again. Scotland's only having a moment. Scotland's like so in right now. We've got to put a stop to it. You must stop Scotland before it becomes too powerful. Could you repeat them for me, please?

Sure can. Curly Boy. Fuck, Curly Boy's good. Squim. Brandenburg Eel. Horny Head Chub. The Round Mound of Flounder. Orottish harlow i know i'm very as a musician that's a lyricist the round mound of flounder is wonderful to say yeah yeah a bit of fun like i genuinely hand on heart would say I think only one of those

I've ever heard before. But I do love the sound of round. I love the sound of round-mounted flounder. Yeah, round-mounted flounder. So I'm kind of hanging my hat on that. But, I mean, I do tend to kind of make a choice early. It's because there's so little of my life left. I've got to get on with shit.

So any. There's no time for messing about. You reckon you might be familiar with one of these? Are you some sort of a fish expert? I wouldn't call myself an ichthyopolis. I don't know if it's

ichthy something, the fish thing. ICH something something. Oh, because they're icky. No. ICH. I know herpetologist is snakes and we know that entomologist is insects yes yes ichthyophile ichthyophile i'm no ichthyophile but uh i've heard of fish and but what's the bird one did you say that one already i didn't that's an ontologist yeah ornithologist. Ornithologist, yeah. Ornithologist. They fucked these up.

It should have just been fish person, bird person. But you get to say ichthyophile. And also, if you fail to say it, we would have a good indicator of whether or not you are having a frontal lobe stroke. Oh, good. It's good to know. It's good to know. F-I-S-T.

What are you thinking, Beck? Any of these standing out to you? Look, here's the thing. I play Animal Crossing. Oh, so you've got an advantage here. Yeah, I've been fishing a lot in Cult of the Lamb this week as well. Do they have real fish in Cult of the Lamb or have they got like... What's the first one?

Curly Boy. Curly Boy. I wish. That sounds like more of a Stardew Valley kind of a name. Yeah, it does, it does. That sounds like such a funny, like you're just looking down your nose. That's more of a Stardew Valley kind of name.

I'm just angling to get ass back on game. Game, game, game, game, game. I think that show needs to exist before you can be on it. Damn. Yeah, it's been a while. Sorry, my life. So, I think that show needs to exist before you can be on it. Damn. Yeah, it's been a while. Sorry, my life. So I think. I'm saying it still exists, of course.

Are you saying you know one of these? I just know a chub is a fish. Oh, okay. I think. Or I'm wrong. And that's the game. That's all you can do in life. Is it a horny? Horny head chub. I think horny head chub does game. That's all you can do in life.

Is it a horny? Horny head chub. I think horny head chub does sound. An eel is a fish as well. As is a flounder. Oh, fuck, I forgot about it. Oh, shit, yeah. Is it a harlow? No.

And boys, of course, can be fish too. You can have boy fish. That's the thing when you're a boy. That's so stupid. You're told that. Hey, you can be a fish too. Unless you're like a clown fish and you can sort of change genders as well, can't you? There's a few fish that can change gender.

Squim? I think that rings a bell. It sounds like it could be a fish. Could be a fish. I just want to stress that gender is a construct. Okay. It's fluid. Well, you've just alienated half our audience.

Or have I? Which half of the audience? Yeah. Come on. The conservatives? Oh, yes. Get out of here. I can't, Beck.

I need to do the show. I want to also say I pointed at you as I said that. Get out of here. Some terrible superpower that i don't want you're doing the chub that was award nominated comedy right there whoa uh all right beck's locking in the chub what do you think you have fuck i don't know i um uh see i think i don't know sometimes i'm I think, I don't know. Sometimes I'm inclined to go with the silly one because it sounds too silly.

Which one's the silly one? I mean, there's a bunch of silly ones. I think the silliest one is maybe Curly Boy sounds probably the least like a real fish. But maybe that's just a red herring. Bam. Oh, that's a fish. I'm very slow today I can't believe I didn't I chose chub

There was flounder Keep talking I'm going to go curly boy Just to I'm not going to play it safe You're feeling the boy I'm taking a risk Alright

That leaves you Geraldine Yeah Geraldine already said it Flounder Flounder Oh you wanted to lock in, flounder. Flounder. Oh, you wanted to lock in the flounder. Yeah. All right, locking that in.

Here's who wrote the answers. Scottish Harlow. That was Evan Murray Smith. Oh, that's so good. You Hibernian trickster. That's so funny. Brandenburg Eel. That's Geraldine Quinn.

Oh, Brandenburg. Yeah yeah it sounds posh doesn't it a squim that was beck betrayed us i realized afterwards i'm like that's just geraldine sometimes that's quinn quinn oh yeah i'm also known as quinn which is the elizabethan-ish word for vulva oh Kenneth Williams over there for a second uh the round mound of flounder Jordan went for that was the house and I I've really just stolen Charles Barkley's nickname of the round mound of rebound congratulations Charles if you're listening uh curly boy which Evan went for that

was Ange the the question writer, a.k.a. the house, meaning the correct answer is the horny head chub. Chub, chub, chub, chub, chub, chub, chub, chub. I love chubs. The fish. Oh, that sounds like a terrible sentence. I'm not thinking. Okay, good.

I love chubs. Let's isolate that sound. Let's get the T-shirts made right now good i love chubs let's uh let's isolate that sound let's get the t-shirts made right now i love chubs uh so after two rounds seven on zero points back on two points the house on two points and geraldine on two points wow wow wow so no winner yet but clearly a loser so far that was a tough one though because like, because like, as you said, chub is a real fish, eel is a real fish. Scrim sounds like a real fish, but that's because it sounds like squid. Yeah, it's the kind of thing you could have believed all of those. I was too.

Everything I came up with was a real fish. And here is question number three. This one comes from Will Wegley from Erie, Pennsylvania. And he's written a local question. I love it when the questions are uh from the from the neighborhood well their neighborhood uh Will writes a company was founded in Erie Pennsylvania in 2020 marketing a unique food or drink product what is it called what is it and what what is its slogan so you get a three a company it's a company that makes a unique food or drink product you got

to give it a name a short description of what the product is and a slogan this is the first time i've had a question so we're naming the product or the company or is that we're sort of saying it's yeah like coke or something yeah exactly yeah um while you're writing your answers i'll let the audience know a little bit more about beck's, horny head chub. Coordinator Ange, the horny head chub is a moderately large, which, man, moderately large doesn't mean anything, slender cylindrical minnow with a rather large nearly horizontal mouth. A small conical barbel. Barbel?

Barbel. B-A-R? B-E-L. Is that barbel? Oh, wow. What does that mean? I don't know what that means. That's present in the corner of its mouth, though.

It's like barbel, right? Is it like one of those, like... Oh. Like a little sharp thing to get you? Maybe it's a little sharp thing to get you. I don't know. And it's conical. Oh.

The back and upper sides... No, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. Barbels are a group of small carp-like freshwater fish, so it's actually genus Barbus. Oh. Does that make sense in that sentence? What, it gets a little fissure in its mouth?

I don't know what that means. Oh, look, I don't know. It doesn't matter. Let's just keep talking about the chub. The back and upper sides of the chub are olive brown with large, dark-edged scales giving a cross-hatched effect. The lower sides and belly are yellowish white males commonly have tubercles which are bony projections on top of the head and a prominent red spot behind the eye total length of the chub is five to seven inches with a maximum

of about 10 inches i was just checking if evan had any of that stuff i didn't hear i was on my attention all right the answers are in for question number three company was founded in about 10 inches. I was just checking if Evan had any of that stuff. I didn't hear. I was on my extension. All right. The answers are in for question number three. A company was founded in Erie, Pennsylvania in 2020 marketing a unique food

or drink product. What is it called? What is it? And what is its slogan? Aquavitality, which is aged urine. And the slogan is we serve you.

We double E. Wheaties. A wheat and marijuana based breakfast cereal. Slogan, start your day the chilled out Wheaties way. That's good shit. We've got Protocol. A high protein, high alcohol beverage for gym junkie party animals. Slogan, spiked protein.

Work hard so you can play hard. That's great. That's so good. Red hot chili pickles. Spicy whole pickles with various levels of heat with the slogan, slam a hot one. Love the way you delivered that, Justin. Pennsylvania steamed cookie. It's a cookie that is self-warming in the package with the slogan, warm and fresh, like mum used to make.

Hang on, how does it self-warm? It doesn't go into the science, Evan. It's just a brief description of the product. I think you should know, though, if it's real. It sounds suspicious. Was that all of it? Or would you... After, I will explain the real product in more detail after.

You mean if it's the real one? Yes. At this point, you can speculate as much as you like, but I can't give too much away. So is that all of them? I think you just did. Oh, sorry, there's another one. The final option is pizza cake.

Eight pizzas stacked on top of each other so that it has the height and density of a cake with the slogan, the goodness of a whole pizza in every slice. It's a pizza cake. Fuck, that's good. That's good. That's really good.

That is very good. That's so good. Whoever did that. If that's real. Oh, my God. Just 2020? 2020. Yeah, that's definitely the vibe of 2020 as well.

Just like, oh, a bunch of pizzas. Have you seen those fairy floss cakes as well? They make me laugh. No. Oh, fairy floss cake is so funny because it's pizzas. Have you seen those fairy floss cakes as well? They make me laugh. No. Oh, fairy floss cake is so funny because it's just like a circular thing of fairy floss and people like cut it like a cake, but it is just fairy. We all lost our minds in 2020 in a real way. Why would anyone do that?

I don't know. It's a lot lighter than a cake. Do they hate the knife? So you at least get like a crusty. I think they do do that. Oh, no, they don't. No. That's a great idea. Because the sugar would melt as the knife. So you at least get like a crusty. I think they do do that. Oh, no, they don't. No. That's a great idea.

Because the sugar would melt as the knife went through and you'd get a bit of a textural difference. No, mostly what I've seen is. Let's workshop this. I've seen people complaining they get them in the mail and they've shrunk and it's like, yeah. But you still send them. Yeah, in the mail.

Jeez. Anyway. Sorry, no. That's not the product. Sorry, can you run through the options? And by the way, sorry, just before you run through the options again, because you have a global audience, fairy floss is candy. Cotton candy.

Did you know this? I learned this recently. The original name for cotton candy was fairy floss. Oh. Yeah, because it's the better name. That was the guy who invented it Called it fairy floss And then it Yeah

Like it's the reason We held onto the original Yeah right Cotton candy makes me feel ill Because it makes me think I'm eating something I shouldn't eat Yeah

Fairies You can eat fairies all the time It's floss It's good for your teeth It's delicious Every morning So you've got aged urine You've got marijuana cereal

You've got high protein, high alcohol drinks You've got spicy whole pickles with various levels of heat Slam a hot one You've got cookies that are self-warming in the package or you got the pizza cake. Now, we all love pizza cake. But I am going to continue the tradition of starting first and making a decision just because I'm done with it.

I think I really like the protocols one because even if- It's a great name. even if it's wrong. Evan just said it's a great name. It might have been him. Imagine. What do you think of Evan? He's just going around going, yes, I'm good. Goddamn, the things I've done are fantastic.

You know, we all should do that more about ourselves. Yeah. It's also funny to think that you've just locked in his answer and then he's complimenting it anonymously. There's nothing to gain from that. It's too late. Well, because I've irritated myself to an incredible degree by starting to follow my macros.

Wait, what does that mean? It's the sort of annoying thing that wellness and health and gym bro kind of people do. It's like your protein, your carbs, your fat. So not just how many calories you're getting, but where you're getting them from. So you might find you're real heavy on the carbs or you're not getting quite enough protein, for example.

So you try to kind of split it so you're getting different kinds of calories from different kind of areas. My brain's in macro territory. And it's very floss cake. Like that's all air. That's carbs. Oh. Air is carbs.

Shit. Everything's carbs. And there's something about the fact that it's called protocol, although that is a little bit cooker, isn't it? That's a word they really like to use. It feels kind of military. It's a real conspiracy theory slash military. But it's a great portmanteau.

I know, but then Evan definitely wrote this one. Evan's written this one. But I think you should choose it to be. So let me just backtrack. I'm just a fan. I just think you should do it so that Evan feels like he gets a win. Do we get any, oh, that's a good point. Yeah, like I think Evan will feel like he gets a ticket.

It's not his birthday. like he gets a win. Do we get any... Oh, that's a good point. Yeah, like I think Evan will feel It's not his birthday. What was the... What was the

the chilli dog one? Red hot chilli pickles. Spicy old pickles with various levels of heat. Great name. Slam a hot one. Oh, damn. He's just...

He acted like that on his head as well. He's in your head. God damn. We'll come back to you, Geraldine. Come back to me. I'm undecided now. I'm going to lock in the cookie one because I want it to be real.

That sounds great to me. I don't know how the science works, but I'm sure they've come up with a way. Sorry. Well, I mean, it's 2020. Anything's possible. COVID hasn't hit yet. 2020 is like beyond the future from back to the future. It's five years advanced.

And in that future, there were pizzas that would get bigger. So you can assume five years beyond that, cookies are warming themselves. So do you get any extra points if you get the right one? You get a point if you get the right one, yeah. You get a point for that in the right one. I felt like Matt gave that away before when he was going, I'll explain how it works at the end. If it's the real one.

But see, Jodie, and I don't want to help Evan out. Who does? I do feel like the protein one is probably right. That feels very, is it protein, alcohol? Yeah, but if you wrote that, you would say that. It feels real, but also obviously it feels nuts to to combine alcohol and gym don't feel nuts without consent alcohol and gym like that's a that's oh they should have called it a gym and tonic oh my god matt that's another standing out put your answer in put your answer

back in you fucked it i don't think it quite makes sense, though, because the tonic is not the alcohol. Anyway. That's just a gross tonic. Tonic with protein. So you're going to go with Protocol, Bec? No, I'm going Pizza Cake. Sorry.

I'll stick with Protocol, because sometimes you can second guess yourself. All right. Here's who wrote the answers. Aged urine. No one touched that. That was Geraldine Quinn. Do you know, I did have a moment where I was like,

that might have some medical things and then I went. Yeah, no, it really doesn't. It doesn't. Don't drink your weed. It feels like the kind of thing that people could be convinced of. Yeah. Oh, some are. Mighty Zinker came up with it.

Wheaties. Start your day the chilled out Wheaties way. That was the house. Nice. That was a good slogan, that one. Yeah, that was good. That should exist. Spicy whole pickles with various levels of heat.

Slam a hot one, which I thought was magnificent. That was Evan Monowitz Smith. I knew it. When you accused him of coming up with it again, I was like, Evan's face. It was so clear that you did come up with it. It was so funny. You've got a real advantage here, Beth.

I know. You can read Evan like a boom. And I wasn't looking at him. I know. You've got to stare at him in the eyes. Did you just go... Okay. Don't hiss at him in the eyes. Did she just go... Okay. Don't hiss at me like a cat.

Evan went for the Pennsylvania steamed cookie, which sounds like a euphemism. That was Beck Betrayed Us. Wait, do you like a fiddle, idiot? Yeah, she knows what I like. Evan likes cookies. The pizza cake, which Beck went for. That was the how. No!

Meaning the correct answer was protocol. Oh, my God! It was just wanky enough to be real. Damn. That's so funny. Thank you, Macros. I'd like to thank my Macros. That means one point for Quinn, one point for the house,

and one point for Beck. Does that still exist, that product? It does, yeah. It works. It was an idea that took off, I guess. Will, who wrote the question, has written a spiel about it and at the end says, but you've got to know I'm not an investor or anything.

I'm just a fan of the drink. So can you remind me what it was? What was the description of it? It was a high-protein, high-alcohol drink. So it's an 8% alcoholic beverage with 11 grams of protein. I did watch a Twitch streamer once saying that the best thing to do, and this is why I know it's not real because I watched a Twitch streamer say it, they're like, the best thing to do is you get really drunk and then you go to the gym because then your brain doesn't

really catch up with what you're doing you're like i'm just gonna lift some weight unbelievably unsafe so i feel like don't do that but that's what that is high alcohol that's so interesting yeah but i think they're saying like they're i was reading their website and it's all about it's the first drink of the night and it's like a it tastes like a juice i think oh it tastes like there's three flavors see i thought it was for going to the gym no yeah i know that makes yeah i assume it was i think but they're like i think you probably go to the gym beforehand maybe right then on your on your night out, you're having... Yeah, right, right, right. It can be quite tough to get enough protein. If you're going for like a 30-30, like a 35-35-30 kind of split, you can...

Yeah, with Joanne, yeah. That's the one that's... That's always the one that's a bit lower. So that's why you're smashing all those whey protein shakes. Yeah, that's right. And you can do that with your first beverage as well. I can't get any... I didn't realise, Geraldine, that you were in this world so much.

You might be able to explain to me what the pun... Not really, but... I've got an app. You're in this world. There's three flavours, and two of them I understand the pun or the wordplay, but the third one I don't get. So there's Swolberry.

Yeah, Swol. Pineapple Pump. Yeah. And Orange County. What's the Orange County one? County. Orange County. Orange County is an American... Yeah, it's a place. It's a place. But there's no

other... Oh, like counting reps or something? Oh, counting your grams of protein. Eleven. Okay. Done. Well, that was what was in the, it's 11 grants. Yeah, 11.

Yes. All right, Adam. Yep, 11. All right, next. All right, here's question number four. This one comes from Santiago Romero from Albuquerque in New Mexico. Wow. And Santiago's question is, which of these is the name of a real Star Wars character?

Oh, God. So you've just got to come up with a fake Star Wars character. Oh, my God. I'm just going to accidentally come up with a real one. Yeah, yeah. There's so many. There's so many. Is Evan the kind of person that would accidentally come up with a real one?

Well, I don't know enough of them. I really don't know enough of them. Okay. I'll make something up and then and then realize that i've just come like there's one that's just in the back of my mind luke skywalker damn it hang on that seems familiar it's so it's still so funny that it's like star wars and like there's so many like cool names like and interesting weird names and that it's like Star Wars and there's so many cool names and interesting weird names and then it's just Luke.

Yeah, Luke. What about Garth Vader? Don't burn him, Charity. I've never guessed that one. Can I just tell you, I think I've told this on a podcast before, but when I used to work in news someone got very annoyed once because there was a news story about like a comic book convention

and they were someone was interviewing someone who was in a Chewbacca costume but they'd taken the head off and we got a really angry message saying I hadn't told my son that Chewbacca wasn't real yet and I was obsessed with it. That's great.

I was so obsessed with that message. So funny. I was like, what? What? What do you mean? What do you mean? What do you mean by this? And like this girl was dressed up as him anyway. Yeah, it was just a Chewbacca. Have you explained to him that costumes are real? Yeah, but also

just the idea that I mean, there are certain things that you, you things that you weave things for kids to up the magic of the world. Yes, democracy works. Capitalism's great, get in, get involved. But yeah, the whole pretending Star Wars is completely real is such an interesting move to do on a child. And I feel like would really fuck up your brains. We're watching another documentary now, Stephen. Come now, Stephen.

Come now. Time to learn of a galaxy far, far away. It was far, far away and it was a long time ago. How did we get the footage? Someone's a fan of the real Chewbacca, you know? Yeah. The real Chewbacca? Right?

Yeah. That's very easy to explain away to a child. They're wearing a Chewbacca, you know? Yeah. The real Chewbacca. Right? Yeah. That's very easy to explain away to a child. They're wearing a Chewbacca costume. A costume of the real creature. Evan, was this you? Did you message me? Wookiees are real kids, so Santa. Wookiees.

That's something from Star Wars. That's something from Star Wars, yes. Yeah, I think Chewbacca's a weird one. I'm struggling to think of things from star wars hey before we get to question four i should tell you a little bit about uh this fantastic drink oh protocol protocol oh yes uh according to will in the early days of covid lockdowns the founding fathers of spike protein had an epiphany and found an untapped area of both the protein drink That's phenomenal. Will says, after writing

a letter, he says, I'm not a founding father or an investor, just a fan of the drink and the show. Thanks so much, Will. Thanks, Will. I've got to say also, I also invented a drink during lockdowns that I think was very innovative. Is it aged wee?

No. No, and stop because i had bad news for you no i invented um spiked barocca oh gosh so when you wake up and you're like oh i don't feel oh i have a barocca and then just fill it with that and that's good, hair of the Barocca. Hair of the Barocca. I feel like there's also, I read a thing that was like, I looked up. I don't know why I looked up. Can you mix Barocca and alcohol? And the internet was like, no, don't do that. Barocca. Why not?

I think they're just frowned upon. Barocca. Barocca. That's not unhealthy or anything. That's just bad etiquette. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Barocca hole. A Barocca hole. It wasn't worth me. It's just bad etiquette. Barocco hole. Barocco hole.

It wasn't worth me. That was good. I thought you were just insulting me specifically. No. You beck rock a hole. No way. I was not. What about hydrolyte and alcohol?

Alkali. Alkali. Alkali. Hydrolaga. Hydrolaga. Hydrolaga. All right, now we're talking. We're brewing beer with it. That sounds no good.

Hey, while you're still writing your answer, let's go for a quick break. All right, your answers are in. Question number four. Which of these is the name of a real Star Wars character? I should quickly check. How much... So Evan doesn't really know much about Star Wars? I've seen them all, but it's like... I think I'm similar to you.

Yeah. I think I now like Star Wars more than Star Wars fans, though. I've watched a lot of the TV shows, and I thought they were all fine. Yeah. I enjoy them but they sort of wash over me i i feel like they wash over me too i just like hanging out in that that world yeah it's relaxing i find it it's just quite sparse and yeah yeah i just like watching those things oh i've never um i'm older than you lot so the prequels is that what they are the

original films yeah that they made sense to me but um i got a bit lost after that and i've never really got into a television series the prequel just because there will be someone going there the prequels are the ones they came out or the noughties maybe no but and the original ones came out in like the 70s or the 80s that's what i grew up yeah yeah but i thought they were i think they just happened before oh no they were the original and the prequels were the ones in that yeah yeah that's how much i know about stars wars whereas i used to know quite a lot and it's all gone now like i had a star wars phase you have to if you're any sort of nerd you have to have a star wars phase but a lot of a lot of us float out and also I had a friend who was really into the Star Wars novels

because there were a lot of novels when I was growing up. Oh, they would have broken their hearts? Well, no, it's just that they knew so much that I felt like I could never live up to it. And they were always like, oh, you know, Squingo, the Gromar version. Bec, don't give it away. I'm sorry.

You're tipping your hand. Anyway, I just felt I could never consume enough to understand it, which is so silly. I gatekeeped myself out of Star Wars. That's funny. Didn't they, at some point they said all those books didn't happen. Yeah, they're not real anymore. Imagine spending all your time learning about the whole world

and then someone comes like oh by the way that's all that's not real i mean personally i feel pretty good as someone who didn't read them to be fair though matt none of it is real what hang on hang on i'm just sorry becca i was that child um all right Which of these is the real name of a Star Wars character? Jib Dodger. Sycorax. Skis Bunko. Don Molo.

Squingo Kentar. Or Laser Vidovic. Jesus. One of those is very similar to what I said. Yeah, that's right. How are we... Squingo Bongo. How are we supposed to...

How do we remember these? I think I need... Can we we remember these? I don't... Can we hear them again? I need to write them down. Yeah. Jib Dodger. Jib Dodger. Sycorax.

Sycorax. Skis Bunko. What? Don Molo. Squingo Kenta. Or Liza Vidovic. Can I make an accusation at Geraldine Quinn that she came up with Sycorax? You can. You can make any sort of... Geraldine Quinn that she came up with Sycorax? You can.

You can make any sort of... Hang on one more time. John Molyneux. Because Sycorax is a Doctor Who villain. Ooh. If it's also from Star Wars, fuck you, universe. You can't have two sci-fi things and then have the same name. I think that would be fantastic.

Shit, unless Sycorax means something else. John Molyneux. Same name. I think that would be fantastic. Shit, unless Sycorax means something else. Done, Molo. Squingor Kentar. Laser Vidovic. Laser Vidovic. Why did I laugh at that? So. Laser is just laser, but you've said it weird.

Do you want to? I mean, sometimes we'll do a round where you can get a bonus point for guessing what the others wrote. Do you want to do that? Guessing what the others wrote? So Beck's suggesting Geraldine wrote Sigur. Because Sigurak's there from, I believe, the Christmas invasion. Do you want to guess who someone. I'll guess what Beck.

I'm going to guess that Beck did Jib Dodger. Because that's what happens if you're in the studio and I'm swinging the jib around. You did almost hit me with it yesterday. There you go. I think that's the inspiration. I would have said Beckwith, Squingy and Kenta. Whatever that one was.

Squingo. Squingo. Squingo. Like Oingo Boingo. Yeah, that sounds like a Beckwood direction. All right. I'm going to pick, what was it? Skis something.

Skis Bunko. Skis Bunko. Skis Bunko. I'm going to guess Skis Bunko. Why not? I mean, they all sound pretty silly. Wait, hang on. One of these is a real Star Wars character, not silly at all.

Sure, five of them might sound silly, but that sixth one. What do you think, Beck? Well, I didn't accuse Evan of one, but I forgot what all of them might sound silly, but that's six one. What do you think, Beck? Well, I didn't accuse Evan of one, but I forgot what all of them were. I'm so sorry. I think you've each accused one of the others. You've accused Geraldine, but has Geraldine accused... I've been accused. It's the accusation round.

Yeah. I'm going to say, well, I'm happy to accuse Evan of something. Oh, yeah. You can accuse each other if you want. Don Molo? Don Molo, yeah. Because I don't think that there would be a Star Wars character called Don, because Don actually means something.

Yeah, Star. Don means what? Yeah, like, same as Luke. There wouldn't be a character called Luke if that's a real thing. It's a title, though, in another language. So why would George? Don is good. Is Don is good.

I was thinking more Don Juan, though, but you went straight to small goods. I love salami. Salami's a great name for a character. Don Giovanni, Don Juan. You've never heard the character of Don Juan? Yeah. Don, it's like the mafia boss is the Don. Yeah.

It's like a title. It's like calling someone a Duke or a Don. Evan just knows Ham. And which one do you think is real, Geraldine? The thing is, George Lucas is a weird guy. Yes. I mean, he could come up with any of these as well. He's got a beautiful mind.

He's a beautiful... How about you, Bec? Do you have any thoughts here? I wanted to also accuse Evan. Can you just read out all of them again? And I'm just going to look at Evan's face. Gib Dodger, Sikorax, Skis Bunko, Don Molo, Squingle Kenta, Laser Vidovic.

He blinked on Squingle Kenta. He did blink on Squingle. But he might just have really dry eyes. Yeah, I think he came up with... Sometimes it has got to blink. I think Evan came up with... Sometimes I just gotta blink. I think Evan came up with... Get the t-shirts ready right now. Sometimes you're just gonna blink. Evan came up with

Lazer. Alright. And I am going with Don because it is good. You think Don's the real answer? Yes, because... You're just hungry. I do want some Twiggy Sticks. Actually, Don doesn't sell Twiggy Sticks. I'm so sorry. I'm going to go Lazer as my answer.

Oh. Although it does remind me of Rem Lazer, like the B. Don't worry. If you watch Red Letter Media, you know what I'm talking about. So that just means, Evan, we need you to accuse Jim. No, I did. I accused Beck of Jim Dodger. But you haven't accused Geraldine.

Oh, I have to accuse Geraldine of something. Sorry. Okay. I think now everyone else has accused everyone else apart from you and Geraldine. You don't have to accuse me. I've been through a lot. You don't have to accuse me of anything. Nah, get her.

It won't be the one that she guessed. No. That is good logic. That's okay. He's done it. It's a double bluff. It could be. And it won't be the one that I guessed Because I think that's real

It won't be the one that I wrote That only leaves two I don't think so No hang on Maybe there's more than that How many are there in total? It doesn't matter It's not the one

So you said Beck did Jim Dodger Yep So it's not that one. You guess Gies, Bunko. I think there's three. Yep. So that leaves Sycorax, Don Molo, Squingor, Kentor, or Laser Vidovic.

Squingor is so good. I'll go Squingor. See, she likes it. Squingor, Kentor, you think? I'm going to pin that on Geraldine. I don't know. Actually, but Geraldine said Beck would have done that. Yeah, but I would say that.

Oh, you're going to do double up? No. All right, this round got really complicated. This round got... This must be brutal to listen to. Anyway, we'll try and make it as simple as possible. Here's who wrote the answers. So, Geraldine went for

a laser video. And Beck thought Evan did that one. But that was actually the house. It was a St. Kilda Ruckman in the 90s. I was about to say it's a sports name. Laser? I was going to guess tennis. Is his name spelled like laser?

L-A-Z-A-R. I knew how it was spelled. I wanted it to be L-A-S-E-R. That's why I shouldn knew how it was spelled. I wanted it to be L-A-S-E-R. That's why I shouldn't have done it. Because I knew it was a name. I'm an idiot. Squingo Kentor. Quinn thought it was Beck.

Evan thought it was Quinn. It was Beck. Yeah, no, that was me. And I was like, why did I accidentally improv a very similar name before it? Then we had Don Molo, whichck thought was real quinn thought was evan and it was evan so you went two for two on your guesses there geraldine wow i just couldn't get the actual answer you do know ham evan thought it was skis bunco but that was actually written by Santiago, aka The House. Santiago. Santiago.

Sycorax, Bexholt was Quinn, and it was... In my defence, it's a Shakespearean character. Really? Is that where they got it from? It's Caliban's mother. She's not seen in the 10-episode. So did you not pick it because of Doctor Who? No, I picked it because of Shakespeare. And those are the two reference points we have.

And I actually went, goddammit, I bet some other literature wanker on the writing team at Doctor Who. Because Caliban's been a Marvel character now. And it's like, well, that's a character from The Tempest. So I was trying to think of a Shakespearean character you wouldn't get.

I should have just said Juliet and be done with it. Macbeth. Juliet Macbeth. Juliet Macbeth. Juliet Macbeth. That's a beautiful name. And that means, Evan thought Beck wrote it, but it's the real answer, Jib Dodger. Damn you, George Lucas.

That's great. What does Jib Dodger look like? What's Jib Dodger? Jib Dodger's a human. Okay. What the shit? That's disappointing. But the, yeah, your logic was pretty close.

So the guy who played him was a small part. He was portrayed by the director of the episode of The Mandalorian, Rick Famuyiwa, and he chose the name himself based on the filming equipment, the jib. And Famuyiwa's love for baseball and the Los Angeles Dodgers baseball team. He's a guy!

He's just a guy, jib dodger. Just look at him he's just a pilot! That's such a great name though and it's so funny that like Evan and the jib, that would be like if you were making like a little figurine of evan i think it would have a yeah i'd have a jib i love the jib or that rig that you wear yeah the easy rig easy rig yeah the jib or the rig i'm not gonna lie i love it when when even

bust the jib out yeah it just makes everything look expensive yeah instant production base so good so that round g Geraldine gets two points. The house gets two points and Beck gets one point. Do I get no point? I don't get any points. I think Evan still. We're still in the school. Oh, my God.

But not. Yes. Didn't Geraldine guess mine? Oh, yeah. I guessed the E-Rack, Don. Oh, no, Beck did guess yours. Yes, that is a point for Evan. Oh, Beck guessed mine.

Apologies there. That's me laughing really loud, isn't it? Sorry about that. Evan is on the board. I've got one. So the scores are now Evan on one point, Beck on four points, but out in front it's Geraldine and the house on five points apiece. Whoa.

Me and the house.ine and the house on five points apiece. Me and the house? You and the house. Is there a sudden death if the house and then Geraldine and the house? No, we just share the win. Question five. Three rounds to go. Question five. The question comes from Azza Ed from Indianapolis in Indiana, and the question is,

what is the name of Paquita La Del Barrio's hit song that was inspired by her ex-husband so it's a it's a is this in Spanish it is but we want the English

translation oh okay thank Christ inspired by her husband El Cristo ah Grazie El Cristo Grazie El Cristo

mi dispiace ma non parlo espanol that was half Italian. I'm really sorry. Ignacio, was it? I think what we said was, thank you, the Christ. So what was the name of our artist again? Paquita La Del Barrio.

Inspired by her husband. Yeah, so it's like a... It's not... She's... It's like a... What do you call it? Like a breakup song, you know? A song title.

Yeah, a song title. Is it a breakup song? She broke up with her husband? Well, it's the... Or is it a love song? It's not a love song. Okay. I've given that away, so I may as well stick with that.

It's a bitter song. Okay, it's a bitter song. It's a bitter song. Okay. While you're writing your answers, here's some more info about jib dodger by the star wars fandom page jib dodger was a pilot in the new england sorry in the new republic starfighter corps after the battle of endor in 9 aby which i guess is a year dodger was assigned to the flight squadron alongside fellow starfighter pilots sash keter and trapper wolf whose duties to the new

republic included responding to active republic tracking beacons and tracking them down jib dodger was a human male with black hair brown eyes and dark skin uh jib dodger's first appearance was in chapter 6 of the 2019 television series the mandalorian which aired aired December 13th, 2019. Yeah, and the name came from Rick Fumiyawa's love of jibs and baseball. The answers are in for question number five. What is the name of Paquita La Del Barrio's hit song? Said her name differently every time. Paquita Ladabario.

And what was the name of her hit song that was inspired by her ex-husband? Alone for Christmas Night. Oh, fuck. Rat with Two Legs. Oh, that's really good. Shove Your Wandering Eye Where the Sun Don't Shine. Oh, my gosh. good. Shove your wandering eye where the sun don't shine. Oh, my gosh. Grab my shotgun.

I'm putting your high horse down. Wow. Your sausage never hit the spot. Or adios, bastardos. I think these are all great lyrics. They're all good. You put this all together, you got yourself a song. That's an album. That's an EP right there.

That's an EP ready to go. Can you record it, Geraldine? We'll put it out. We'll start a new label here today. Stupid old records. I just want to put my hand up right now because it struck me and I felt it. The rat one. Okay.

It's very good. I'll tell you why. it and the rat one okay it's very good i'll tell you why because it feels like the kind of thing that would be a phrase in like spanish yeah i'm presuming spanish by the way i don't know whether they're portuguese or spanish i yeah i'm mexican i think it was spanish yeah so so um yeah it feels like that might be a common phrase somewhere else in the world that is being translated to English. Okay. And also I just, a rat with two legs? Yes.

That's good. That's so evocative. In saying that, I don't want to like sway you away from it. No, no, I love it. I'm happy to stick with it. I'm winning. But rats generally do wander around on two legs a bunch. Yeah.

How many legs does a rat have arms or do they have four legs? They have four legs. Actually, good point. They've got four legs. You're right. I prefer to think of them as like gesticulating. In my head, they're little rat men. Like Ratatouille.

Yeah, Ratatouille is also not real. Oh, fuck. Sorry. Why did I go to that restaurant? Their rib cage is all squished and they can get into tiny little spaces. Rats are amazing. I've opened up Google Translate. Rat with two legs translates to rata con tu patas.

Oh, hang on. The two just translates to two. Rata con dos patas. You just look up two in Spanish. I'd written it down. Do you want to hear what the other ones translate to? I think this will help. Oh, yeah.

Do you want to hear what the other ones translate to? Yeah, I think this will help. Oh, yeah. Alone for Christmas night is solo para la noche de navidad. Oh, that's so sad sounding. Feliz navidad. A couple of these are quite long. Feliz navidad, you bastard.

Shove your wandering eye where the sun don't shine is mete ojo O ojo erante Donde el sol no brilla That sounds hard to sing That would be hard to remember That's the whole chorus But it might just be you man I feel like Yeah that might be me Grab my shotgun I'm putting down your high horses

Agarra mi escopeta Estoy bayando tu caballo alto. Yeah, catchy. And then your sausage never hit the spot. Tu salchicha nunca de en el clavo. Apologies for Spanish speaking listeners. See, as a songwriter, I think about the rhyme as well. So, like, the clavo, I could hear a lot of different rhyme words

that would end in that, whereas Navidad, I mean, even... But Spanish words? Even Jose didn't... Yeah, I'm thinking Spanish words. Oh, okay. Even, like, Feliz Navidad doesn't... Navidad doesn't rhyme with much apart from Feliz Navidad. Why do you think he sang it, like, four times in the chorus? But what if it doesn't rhyme with much apart from Feliz Navidad. Why do you think he sang it like four times in the chorus?

But what if it doesn't rhyme? Felicidad. It will. The music. Finally, Adios Bastardos translates to Adios Bastardos. Yeah, I don't know. That sounds real to me. That works in everything.

It's succinct, but I think it's a red herring. Adios, patados. Adios, patados. Espero año y felicidos. So, all right. One more time, quickly through. Alone for Christmas night. Rat with two legs.

Shove your wandering eye where the sun don't shine. Grab my shotgun. I'm putting your high horse down. Your sausage never hit the spot. Adios, quickly through. Alone for Christmas night, rat with two legs, shove your wandering eye where the sun don't shine, grab my shotgun, I'm putting your high horse down, your sausage never hit the spot, or adios bastardos. I'm sticking with rat. I love the rat. I'm going with wandering eye. Wandering eye forever. I'm going alone on Christmas night,

even though the rhyming doesn't work. This is either, I think I just like Christmas. Evan, if you've written this. You do like Christmas. You wrote a wonderful show about how much you like Christmas. I know, maybe this might be a trap. I just like Christmas. Evan, have you written this? You do like Christmas. You wrote a wonderful show about how much you like Christmas. I know. Maybe this might be a trap. I'm falling in.

I loved it. I loved your show. Let me in. All right. Here's who wrote the answers. Adios Bastardos. That was Geraldine Quinn. Oh, it's so good.

Your sausage never hit the spot. That was Beck Betrayed Us. Grab my shotgun. I'm putting your high horse down. That was The House. That's a good one. It's big country and western. That's why I didn't go for it. the spot that was beck betrayed us grab my shotgun i'm putting your high horse down that was the house that's a good one it's big country and western that's why i didn't go for it uh everyone for shove you're wandering i wear the sun don't shine that was asiad aka the house it was a little little combo between me and me and asiad there he had some uh something probably

more believable than i made it real long uh alone for christmas night beck went well that was evan ah fuck is that did you do that on purpose no not for beck i didn't like i didn't specifically but that wasn't a birthday present is it yeah it isn't because i already have bought christmas stuff. And that means... Joe O'Dayne was correct. Rat with two legs. Wow. That's great.

It is. I think it's a good one. Rata de dos patas. Nice. That is phenomenal. Great title. So good. And I'll tell the listeners a bit more about that song shortly.

Apparently it was... I think maybe even her ex helped helped write it and he because he didn't feel the same as she did obviously about himself he used the ex-mexican president as his inspiration so he was so he was aware what it was gonna be but he just removed himself in the creative process so that he could better serve his ex i believe so yeah that's very professional yeah yeah yeah and it became a massive hit over there apparently it's like our dog gonzo for me is named after chile gonzalez is a musician musician but beck doesn't like him and so for beck he's named after the dog no it's named after gonzo journalism oh okay oh i thought it'd be named after

your dog isn't your dog called Gonzo? Yeah, no, I'm saying the dog is named Gonzo. Is that what you're saying? Yeah. He's named after himself, everybody. Guys, I'm really tired. Gonzo is Gonzo. Imagine how much I'd win if I wasn't so tired.

Only two questions to go. You just got the answer right. I don't think I can come back from two points You've got to remember the final round is worth Oh Come on, crack on guys, I've got to get home I still don't know if I can So, question six comes from Tom Henry

From Scranton, Pennsylvania Oh, Scranton? Oh, there's a lot of really good musicians around there Oh yeah Is it a music question? It is Oh, there's a lot of really good musicians around there. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well. Is it a music question? It is.

So don't give it away if you know the answer. The question is, what event that inspired a popular Harry Chapman song happened in Scranton, Pennsylvania on March the 18th, 1965? I think I know this song. Oh, shit. You guessed last then, but still make up an answer. Yeah, I'm thinking. I'm thinking. An event. Yeah, well, you know, something happened.

Right, right, okay. Like a historical event. I see, right, right, right. Just a thing. So in that last round, Evan got another point, Geraldine got another point, and the house got another point.

So the scores are now Evan on two points, Beck on four points, and Geraldine and the house on six points. But while they're writing their answers, here's a bit more info

about that famous song, A Rat With Two Legs. According to Alzaed, even though the song was written for Paquita La Del Barrio's ex-husband, it was inspired by the Mexican president, Carlos Salinas de Gotari, who many believe that he was giving away the wealth of the nation to foreign ownership. The United States backed him on his bid for director general of the newly created World Trade Organization, which later was one of the many reasons the Mexican population believed he was cheating the Mexican people since it devalued the peso

and led to the worst economic crisis in history. The song has insult after insult that can be taken towards either her ex-husband or the ex-president of Mexico. When was it written? Like, when did it get released? Like, what kind of era are we talking about? I don't know Mexican politics very well, so... Let me have... I'm just curious when...

What era birthed this song? I went to Google my answer as if that was there. Sausage hits the spot. That song. What the fuck? What a rat. Oh, it looks like... Recent?

According to Google, 2004. Okay. Well, not that recent. 20 years ago. Here's some of the lyrics from it, though, if you're interested. Yeah. And it's just all insults, basically. Filthy rat.

Creeping animal. Scum of life. Shoddy monstrosity. I mean, these are the English translations. Yeah. And it's just all insults, basically. Filthy rat. Creeping animal. Scum of life. Shoddy monstrosity. I mean, these are the English translations. Yeah. Subhuman. Specter of hell. Damn vermin.

Wonderful. How much damage you've done to me. Vermin. Poisonous serpent. Waste of life. I hate and despise you. Two-legged rat. I'm talking to you because a creeping creature, even being the most cursed compared compared to you is very small. Damn leech.

Damn cockroach. You who infects with bites. Who hurts and who kills. Your listening to me is useless. Hyena of hell. How much I hate you and despise you. Did they get back together? Yeah. Mexico voted him back in the next election.

And she got back with her husband. That's good to know. Oh, that's fantastic. It's just like, yeah, non-stop. But to each saying that, I feel like everyone knows someone who, like, they broke up with someone and they were like, yeah, this guy's a copymaker. It's a copymaker. But then they get back together and you're like, uh-oh,

but what about all that stuff we said together? Well, it reminds me of the lyrics to the unfairly robbed Croatian Eurovision entry, the Lit 3 song, which was really about Putin. And the chorus is all just insults. It's just, you crocodile-like psychopath. That's nice. I love it.

I love the idea of a song that's just insults and then go, yeah, it's about you. I'm just going to check I messaged Matt and not someone saying happy birthday. I did message Matt. Great. Yeah, because that was a weird message, Matt. Especially for the last round.

That would have been. I'm sorry, Dad. Oh, fuck. All right. The answers are in for question number six. What happened in Scranton, Pennsylvania on March the 18th, 1965? Inspired a song. Joe Biden celebrated his 21st birthday in his family home, which his dad built with his bare hands,

and Biden still resides in to this day. We're not staying in the White House. Evan. You're a big Biden man. Evan watches too. I do follow American politics. Evan loves Rachel Maddow. Have you discussed this?

I've walked in on him watching it. Pants up or no? Sorry, Rachel. That was uncalled for. If Rachel. If Rachel... If Rachel's listening. Evan just went red. Evan loves Rachel Maddow.

Like, loves listening to Rachel. And I feel like Rachel Maddow mostly just goes, she goes, well, that means something. And it never does. That was a pretty good Rachel Maddow. And she's, like, pretty partisan in favour of Democrats. Yeah, but I don't know. She's a lefty.

She's on MSNBC. But she's not. But she's fairly level headed. MSNBC is lefty. Microsoft NBC. That's what the M is? Yeah, I think it is. Microsoft NBC.

Is that right? Maybe, yeah. Yeah. I've never thought. I always forget that MSN is Microsoft. I just think of MSN. Hey, Matt. Lefty doesn't mean full-blown communist.

You can still kind of be in a... Do you know what I'm saying? I'm not. I don't know what... You're going to start... Mate, I'm Swiss-Italian, okay? I'm Switzerland. I'm neutral. You're going to start talking to us about the UN next?

I think Biden and Trump both have good points. Oh, God. Like, they're the two options. Yeah. So, that was your first option, Joe Biden's birthday. Remember that famous song everyone sings? Yeah. Joe Biden turned 21 in that house that his dad built with his bare hands.

I don't know the melody, but it's something like that. Yeah, that's good. Option two, the great Scranton train heist where a single man stole a whole train full of gold. A gazelle escaped the zoo, the local zoo, causing havoc in the town centre. The city commemorates the event annually with the Scranton Scramble, a charity race where locals dress as animals and run blindfolded down the main street. The Scranton Scramble.

That's good. That is good. The Scranton coal mine disaster when 67 people died in a mining collapse. Wow. And why not make a jam about that? Well, it doesn't have to be a jam. It could be a... Oh, do you want a mournful...

His big song is Cats in the Cradle. Cats in the Cradle. Okay, right. It would be a bit... It would be melancholy. You can think there's a whole history of folky sort of guitarists. I also just remember the blues exists. Yeah.

Gordon Lightfoot wasn't blues. No, but sad songs can exist. Joni Mitchell. Did she write jams? Anyway. A truck hauling bananas crashed. Killing 30,000. Spilling, not killing.

I was going to say. They were all allergic to potassium. Killing 30,000 pounds of bananas. Okay. Spilling 30,000 pounds of bananas all over the road. RIP bananas. Or a local laborer was convicted of a murder they didn't commit, but were executed before they were proven innocent.

Oh, man. See, that feels real. Do they have capital punishment in Pennsylvania? I don't know enough about the US states. Scranton where... Since when? It was 1965, so probably. Australia had capital punishment in 1965, I think.

It's where the office is made. I think the last... Maybe the last man was killed and capital punished in Australia in 66. Am I right in saying that? I want to look it up now. So you got Joe Biden's birthday, Scranton train heist, the Scranton scramble,

Scranton coal mine disaster, the banana crash, or the man executed, the innocent man being executed. 67 was when Ryan was hanged in Australia. Right, 67. you did 67 was the it was when ryan was hanged in australia 67 so yeah um for listeners geraldine isn't on first name basis with a nazi surname what was his name uh ronald ryan isn't it yeah that's the last oh you seem to have a lot of american listeners yeah so the last man

hanged in australia the capital punishment was in Victoria in 1967. And what did he do to deserve that? I think he was murdered, but I have a vague idea that maybe he might not have actually done that. And that's just kind of the sticking point with the death penalty. And I think Bolte, the bridge man, was the premier at the time. Am I right in saying that? Look, I'm going to have to click through a few more Wikipedia pages for that one.

Well, so. Bolty the Bridgeman is a great name. There's a lot of great options here. There are a lot of great options, Evan. Thank you so much for being the only one, including me, who's still concentrating on the game. Scranton Scramble sounds great. That was a big snort there, Ben.

The Scranton snort. It sounds like eggs. I can't remember what it actually is, but it sounds like scrambled eggs, which I like. So you're going to rule out getting the Scranton scramble? Well, no, I don't know if I'm walking it in. I'm just pointing out. The scramble, that's the charity race.

But, Evan, did I do that because I know you love scrambled eggs? Do you write a song about a charity race? What do you write a song about? No, it's not. It could be about like. It could be that that's the setting of the song. Oh, okay. Right, right.

Like at that. Maybe he met his lover there. Sweetheart. Sweetheart's better than lover. Yep. He met his sweetheart at the Scramble. I met my sweetheart at the Scramble. I met her when her eyes looked so blue.

Maybe it's not a website. Cornflower blue? Maybe he lost his sweetheart at the Scranton Scramble. I lost my sweetheart at the Scranton Scramble. It's a very musical episode. Thanks, guys. She was dressed as an elephant. Or she ran into a bunch of other elephants.

Now she's gone. I can't rhyme. I mean, I think that's got potential. I'm the one who'll never forget. That's good. Nice. That's got potential. The Bananas, I'm not sure if I see that being a song or triggering.

30,000 pounds of bananas. It's a lot of bananas. I see that being a movie. Yeah, it's more than a song. Yeah, you could do a feature, but I don't know about that. Wait, is that what the song Have a Banana is about? Because there were so many bananas on the ground. If they're on the floor, they're out the door. Three-second rule.

Go, go, go. You can eat a banana off the ground. Oh, this is unpeeled. Okay, no worries. To me, the most... Transporting them unpeeled Okay, don't worry To me the most Transporting them unpeeled I mean peeled Unless they're unpeeled

Sorry, I said unpeeled I don't know why I said We're losing it I think I I think the most The one that sounds most real to me Is the Maybe the coal mine

As much as it's the sadder one Not the execution one I mean that's also good Those two are the sort of They feel more Stop trying to sway things Mr you I want to pick that

He wants me to win I want the execution one I think you could write a ballad about either of those things And that could be a... Is it a hit? Did you say it was a hit song? Maybe it was a flop. What did I call it?

I don't know. I called it a popular Harry Chaplin song. Popular. I don't know if it's... I think I'm going to go cold. I think maybe there's... I don't know. The coal mining disaster.

Yeah. All right. And you what? did you want to- I think of the era in American songwriting, there were a tremendous, well, North American is in the continent. There were a lot of like Jim Crowsons and Chapmans and like Whitefoots. So I think that that kind of balladeer tragic tale makes sense to me for that 60-ish era. Like the hurricane by Bob Dylan and that sort of balladeer tragic tale makes sense to me for that 60-ish era.

Like the hurricane by Bob Dylan and that sort of thing. Yeah, so I reckon there would 100% be some kind of wrongful execution kind of a ballad. That leaves you, Bec? Yeah, I'm looking in the saddest one, the bananas. I hope you're me. I'm looking in the saddest one. The gazelle escaped the zoo.

All that wasted potassium. How sad. I'm logging in the saddest one. Joe Biden turned 21. All right, let's go through and write the answers. Joe Biden celebrated his 21st birthday in his family home. That was Tom, aka the house. Really?

That's so funny. He actually wrote it as he was born in that house. But I'm like, they'll figure out that he's younger than that. He's older than that. Oh, right, right, right. But yeah, you laughed at the idea of him. I mean, still, I think I made it more ridiculous somehow that a song would be written about his 21st birthday party.

I mean, it might have gone off. The great Scranton train heist, that was Beck the Traitor, where a single man stole a whole train full of gold. I feel like the 60s is actually the wrong time for that to happen as well. The great train robbery was in the 60s.

Oh, was it really? The gazelle escaping the local zoo. That was the house. Oh, I would have picked that. That's good. Scram, scramble. Scram, scramble. Scram, scramble. Scram, scramble.

So then we had Geraldine went for the local labourer, convicted of murder. That was Evan Munro-Smith. Wow. Well, revenge. Let me just say, revenge is going to be sweet. Evan went for the Scranton coal mine disaster Which was Geraldine Quinn Which means that was correct

It's a truck full of bananas crushing I killed bananas That is so sad Well done Is the song like Oh bananas What is it? What's it called?

What's it called? It is called 30,000 Pounds of Bananas. Is it really? Yeah. This is a popular song. Yeah, it was an album track, but apparently played it live and the crowd sang along and stuff. But it's a pretty grim story in some ways because the truck driver died in the crash. Oh.

Anyway. I mean, that is sad. Okay. Oh, my goodness. It is a song. Wow. But it is just, I mean. It's actually from 1974 album, so I feel like you might have steered us a bit wrong there.

How were they carrying 30,000 bananas? The incident happened in 65. Oh, it's a tribe. 30,000 pounds of bananas. The incident was 65. The song was 74. What happened? Okay, let me ask the question again, Geraldine.

I mean, it's already. What event happened in Scranton, Pennsylvania on March 18, 1965? No, no, don't come at me with your facts. That's not the point of the game. That's incredible, though. He wrote the song, what, nine years after the event. Well, he was probably writing it for nine years. Oh, yeah, right.

That's an opus. So on to the final question. It's going to be the one that takes you the longest to write because it's a mini film synopsis. Oh, shoot. What? Maybe three or four odd sentences. Yeah. And it comes from Peter Atkin from York. So it would probably be three or four odd sentences. Okay.

And it comes from Peter Atkin from York. And Peter's question is, what is the synopsis of the 2011 film Blabarella? Blabarella. What is the synopsis of the 2011 film Blabarella? So that's a real film. A real film, yeah. Oh.

I can see where they've got their inspo from. And while you're writing your answers, here's some more info about the banana disaster. I feel like, sorry, I just want to say, I feel like these synopses are going to be skirting quite a few tense PC moments. Well, that sounds like yours is going to. Yeah.

What are you talking about? Well, I'm not the one making the film film but i can imagine the kind of people that mine mine is a beautiful story about a whale oh man don't burn it back sorry what were you gonna tell us about tell us about the bananas so this is according to wiki on march the 18th 1965 a 33 year old truck driver named Eugene P. Seske was on his way to deliver a load of bananas to Scranton, Pennsylvania. Seske was driving a 1950s Brockway diesel truck tractor with a 35-foot semi-trailer and was headed down Route 307 when a two-mile descent extending from Lake Scranton to the bottom of Moosick Street that includes a drop in elevation of more than 500 feet in less than a mile and a half. Seske was unable to control the truck's speed down the hill due to a mechanical failure,

variously attributed to the truck's brake system or its clutch. As a result, the truck cruised into Scranton at approximately 90 miles per hour or 140 k's, sideswiping a number of cars before it crashed into a house close to the bottom of the hill. Witnesses reported that Seske did everything possible to avoid pedestrians and other motorists, including climbing out of the truck's running board to try and warn people, and some have suggested that he may have deliberately flipped the truck over to avoid striking either bystanders or an automotive service station that could have exploded in flames.

So he kind of died a hero. Oh, wow. He was thrown from the truck and killed, and bananas were spilled and strewn when the rig came to rest. Fifteen others were injured, but only Seski died. When I said it was a sad story as a joke, it was a sad story. Yeah, it was.

Oh, man. Yeah, it was really sad, but it was like if he, you know, tried to do self-preservation and just kept the truck upright, probably a lot of people would have died. So folk singer Harry Chapin wrote a song about the incident which was called 30,000 Pounds of Bananas and it was an album track on the same album as Cats in the Cradle. Wow. And according to Tom, Chapin promised to donate the song's royalties to the family of the truck driver.

And did he? Well, he actually, I assume so. But he actually died in a car accident himself. That's so sad. Yeah, when he was still in his 30s. Here is the final question. And yeah, just a reminder, this is worth triple points. So it is truly still anyone's game.

I'm just admiring that Evan's phone design is different to mine. That's really interesting. Before you were saying you were's phone design is different to mine. That's really... It's quite sharp. Really interesting. Before you were saying you were in a hurry for us to go. I am. And now you're stopping to talk about a phone design? I'm not in a hurry to go.

I love this. I just have to travel a long way. All right, here's the final question. What is the synopsis of the 2011 film Blubberella, a space comedy romp based on Barbarella about an intrepid porpoise on a journey of sexual awakening throughout the galaxy.

Because as we all know, dolphins be randy. Did I say porpoise right? Poipus. Poip, poip, po. Are you okay? Poip. Poipus.

You're okay. Yeah, you got it. Okay. Option two in the year 2084 8 year old Francis' parents Take him to a hospital When they are unable to make him stop crying At first the hospital staff are dismissive But soon are convinced

There is something abnormal going on And scientists and religious leaders Travel from around the world to see him A debate breaks out between them Is Francis a sign of the impending rapture, or could his tears be a way to save a world with fast-depleting resources? Wow. Okay.

Wait, you drink... Oh, I see. I guess you'd need a de-cell plant. Yeah, you would. Option three. A classic sci-fi sexploitation adventure where Delilah Conteco, a renowned scientist, is involved in a workplace accident

which causes her body to be genetically mutated with fish DNA, granting her giant blubbery breasts. Thank you, Geraldine. Thank you, Geraldine. A heroic vampire-human hybrid takes on an army of Nazis in this outrageous action comedy. Blubberella is a heroine with a hatred of Hitler and a soft spot for cotton candy. Her footsteps cause explosions

and her jewel swords are used against anyone who makes fun of her. Oh. A mix-up at birth leads to Cinderella living a happy life whilst being replaced by the local orphan girl, Blub. Blub might not have the looks of your average princess, but she makes up for that with both brawn and brains. Jesus. Okay.

Blubber Ella has no time for the patriarchy, let alone some prince, and she soon smashes a glass slipper on her way to shattering the glass ceiling. That's good. That's good. Or deep sea diver Mark Hollows has a score to settle. After his wife is murdered by a giant killer whale,

he dedicates his life to vengeance against the creature known locally as Blubberella, an action thriller on the open sea. I think that's Evan. I think that's Evan as well because Evan loves the sea. I think you did the sexy one.

I think... I really do think that one you were reading about the Nazis, that feels like. That feels real. I don't know why. I think it's so silly. Which was the Nazi one? The Nazis were real.

Vampire Human Hybrid takes on the Nazis. Oh, right. So locking that in for Beck. That feels, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sure.

Okay. What was the first one? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sure. Okay. What was the first one?

First one was a space comedy romp based on Barbarella about an intrepid poipus on a journey of sexual awakening throughout the galaxy. It's getting more wrong. Did you just want him to say it? Because as we all know, dolphins be randy. What was the second one? Sorry. Second one was in the year 2084, eight-year-old Francis' parents take him to hospital.

He can't stop crying. That one, I think, was actually... That's actually a song by Chappin. Harry Chappin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was just the full lyrics to a Harry Chappin song. In the year 2084, eight-year-old Francis' parents... So many different interpretations of blubber.

Well, two. Crying. There's two. Crying and fish. Fish fat. Fish fat. Mammal fat, really. And Nazi hating.

Yes, that's it. That one's more abstract. Maybe I'll go that one. Maybe I'll go the sci-fi tears. Sci-fi tears. Yeah. In the year 2084. Okay.

Heaven. All right. Well, I think... First, I just want to acknowledge that the shattering of the glass slipper like she shattered the glass ceiling. See, I am tired. Is great. That's a great line.

That's a great line. Very good, yeah. It's like, whoever was that well done um now i think i feel like it might have been beck i don't know but um i actually think i'm gonna go for the joan almost breasts one because because i'm like well maybe it is But because I think that Blubberella does sound like a porn film. Yeah. And I think it's definitely something to do with a Jane Fonda movie. All right.

Well, answers are locked in. Let's go through who wrote them. Comedy Space Romp based on Barbarella with the porpoise. Porpoise or perp? Porpoise. Porpoise. I think it's porpoise. Man, that word is tricky.

It's really not. That was Geraldine Quinn. That's what I thought you said, the sexy one. I thought that's what you meant. No, no. Raining dolphins. No. Well, look, I'll level with you.

No, you keep saying answers. All right. Deep sea diver Mark Hollows is after a giant killer whale who murdered his wife. That was Evan. Yeah. Just as Beck said straight away. Yeah. And as did I.

Yeah. That's what he said before me. Like everyone. You went straight for it. Evan loves the sea. I had no idea. went straight for it. Everyone loves the C. I had no idea. He loves Rachel Maddow and the C. The life of love and my lady is C.

And as MSNBC. I know, don't make it sound. The B stands for Blubberella. The mix up at birth with the shattering glass. That was Peter in the house. I wrote that line. Thank you so much, Geraldine, for those sweet words. That was good.

I've just remembered I'm in a two-hour car spot. There was no greater compliment than saying, I reckon Beck wrote that. Oh, my God. I was like, oh, that's nice. No. Geraldine went for the one with the giant blubbery breasts. That was written by Beck Petratus.

Happy birthday, Beck. And you committed to pretending it wasn't you. I had a moment of, do you know what? Let's play the game. What if I trick Geraldine into thinking I didn't write it? But we both went for Barbarella. Exactly. I thought we would both go sexy things.

Sexy Barbarella. It felt right. Evan went for the one about the boy who couldn't stop crying. That was Peter in the House. Meaning the correct answer is a heroic vampire human hybrid takes on an army of Nazis. Do you want to look at the video? I just started dabbing to celebrate. What?

So that means. What the hell has that got to do with the name of the film? Well, I didn't talk about it much, but she's really big. That was what I was trying to get at at the start of the question. I was like, no one do that. That's on the filmmakers. Yes, that's right. And, yeah, I will say that it is not a well-liked film.

13% audience, not enough critics have given it a score. But the star of the film, Lindsay Hollister, said she took the role saying that she started out with a bit of work, but then parts started drying up for bigger women like herself. And she said, I want people to know we weren't setting out to hate fat people. It's important for me that people know the true story because I got a lot of backlash, I'm guessing. She went on to say, this movie was made with the best intentions. I truly wanted to make a movie about a fat girl who could kick ass.

But yeah, I don't think the filmmakers had the same vision and they did a lot of like pretty well i hope she's doing well yeah um yeah well i think yeah i think i mean in that interview she came out pretty well but it's so grim that she has to come out defending it's like i just want to work yeah and i wasn't trying i wasn't meant to be. Anyway, score update. Here's the final scores. In fourth place on three points, it's Evan Munro-Smith. Thank you. You're on the board there, Evan. I feel like it's not good news from here on in, though. Do you hate me and Geraldine?

I mean, for me. Oh, for you. In third place on seven points is Geraldine Quinn. How did that happen? Well, you didn't get any points in the triple score last round. I won in my heart. Actually, no, hang on. And the house also on seven.

That means out in front on 11 points, it's birthday girl. Thanks for trading. Happy birthday. Thank you, giant boobs. I forget. I think I changed the rules recently so the house can't get triple points. So that means me and Geraldine are a draw. Anyway.

Hey. I'm making it harder for the house. Everyone wants to say thank you to giant boobs. I always. Every day I wake up. I don't know why I did that. I just kiss the sky As the winner, Beck and the birthday

Woman You said woman in the worst way Woman is ever being said I was going to say birthday girl but it seemed weird Because you're 18 aren't you I'm aged now, thank you so much Today you are of age Woman

I prefer birthday man Birthday ma'am Today you are a mage. Woman. So, birthday woman. I prefer birthday ma'am. Birthday ma'am. Birthday memories. My birthday memories are coming in. What does that mean? I don't know. I grant you giant blubbery.

Happy birthday. Please edit all that out. Leave it in. Where can people find you, Beck? You can find me at Beckness on any platform, but particularly on Twitch where I hang out and I do lots of silly things. You make things. Do you know what?

Generally, I've stopped doing arty streams and mostly all I'm doing is making a big mess. Usually, there was one stream I did in a boat. No reason. People are looking for reasons. I was just in a boat in the water rowing around and talking and pretending to be a sea captain. That's sick.

You can do anything. You can do anything, but don't do that because I hurt my whole body. Oh. Because, you know, you have to row in a boat. Rowing takes a lot of strength. I imagine, like, a motorboat wouldn't be ideal for streaming. No. Oh, that sounds calming, actually.

I'll fall asleep to that. Evan would love it, Out in the Sea. Evan, where can people find you? Out in the Sea. You can find me on Gamey Gamey Game is a show that I make about video games sometimes. It's on YouTube, on Stupid Old Channel. But if you just go to YouTube and search for Gamey Gamey Game, you'll find it. Yep. And say, Book Geraldine. And everyone's been on it. Geraldine's been on it a couple of times. Bec's been on it. I youtube uh on stupid old channel but if you just go to youtube and search for gamey gamey game you'll find it yep um so book geraldine and everyone's been on geraldine's been on a couple times beck's been on i've been on once matt's been on have you only been on once

once i was on the red dead redemption that was on the first episode yes red dead redemption too great game but for some reason i haven't um never booked you again didn't book me much i don't know if there's anything to do i mean mean, he has. I've been on a few times. But also, I don't play video games, so it makes a lot of sense. He hates gingers. Oh, yeah. Which is self-loathing. And Geraldine, where can people find you? You can find me on Geraldine Quinn.

Geraldine. What? Geraldine Quinn. Or Geraldine Quinn Official. And it's not because I've got tickets on myself. It's because my name is so common. I can't always nab it on the socials. But I'm on TikTok.

Geraldine Quinn. Is that a common name? Are you joking? It's not Matt Stewart. It is in Ireland. Wow. Do you want to know how many spam emails I get for Dublin properties and racehorse breeding?

A lot. Can you forward them along? Sure. Yay. I ended up actually setting up an automatic reply that just said, you have the wrong Geraldine Quinn. I thought you were about to say you set up a horse fuck scenario. What?

What kind of a website do you think I have? Anyway, I'm on TikTok and Instagram. I'm on whatever was Twitter. I Googled Geraldine Quinn and you are the only result. So I think you've made it up. There's no other Geraldine Quinns. Geraldine Quinn horse. You're going to get something you don't want on your browser search history.

Wow, you really don't say no to any rules What does that mean? Wow She played a horse Oh, okay Pantomime Pantomime Pantomime

All cabaret people turn to panto eventually That's the natural progression I think this episode is going to have a bunch of outtakes after the song if you want to stick around, listen to some nonsense. Thanks so much for listening. Thanks so much for joining us.

Happy birthday, Beck. Everyone say happy birthday, Beck, in the tweets. It'll be about a week and a half late, but please give us a five-star review and in that review, you can say happy birthday, Beck, if you wanted to.

Tell your friends if you think you know anyone who might enjoy this show, and cheers for tuning in to Who Knew It with Matt Stewart. Now that you know it, I've been Matt Stewart. Goodbye. Is that a good start? Get them out. Get them out.

Get them all out. This is going to be a high-up fame. I couldn't sleep last night. I put in my ear Pokemon facts that go for an hour, and I do feel like I did lose my mind in my sleep last night. Okay. Well, I think you've given away all that you're after, like Pikachu's mom. Pikachu's mom?

You idiot. Pikachu doesn't have a mum There are dad Oh you don't even I was gonna say Pikachu If anyone's gonna be A virgin birth

Come on Oh wait That means you have a mum That means no dad Yeah Oh nah Pikachu's in a tube Pikachu

Was born in a Pikachu Pikachu Virgin birth With no mum Just means The dad Sprogged him out Fully formed Right down that Narrow Tick a tube. Virgin birth with no mum just means the dad scrubbed them out fully formed.

Right down that narrow. Your eyes widen. Also, Beck and Geraldine, there'll be some silences while you're writing. These will just get edited out. I actually was just thinking it would be so nice to have a podcast in silence, but then I was like, oh, that's just silence. You can just not put anything in your ears. But it is funny because you would be listening to other people being silent.

So it feels different. It feels heavier. Yeah. I've had a book about community radio, and it used to say, dead air is loud. And I was like, that's so deep. Oh, my God. Well, I thought, like, for protesting, when you did, like, protests

and you'd, like, not have anything playing, that's loud. But also then the backup tape would kick in. And at the station I used to work at, it was totally addicted to bass, and that is loud. Wow. At the scene it was, or at least the year I was there, it was totally addicted to bass and that is loud where was wow it was um or at least the year i was there it was uh blue blue juices but they changed it they updated it to addicted to bass because i still i hear that song and it makes me feel a little pavlovian um what do you call it pavlov's dog kind of. Yeah, it makes me feel Pavlov's dog, which I have on me always.

Give him a little pat. It's so interesting that what I'm about to say is not interesting, and I started the sentence, but I'm committing. It's so interesting that Pavlov sounds very similar to Pavlova. It is, yes. It's not interesting. You could have a Pavlova dog. Now I've said it, I want a Pavlova dog.

That would be because Pavlova is named after someone called Pavlova. Is it really? A ballerina? Ballerina. Hey, are you playing your own game over there? No. That's so fun. It's because it's a name that two different people have.

I can't believe that. I'll never believe that. That's a fact too fun for me. Don't feed pavlovas to dogs, okay? No, but I'll make a dog-owl pavlova. That's okay. Is that kosher? You make it out of chum.

What? Yeah, make a dog, but it's a pavlova-shaped dog. Oh, yeah. Dog-shaped pavlova. How good are your meringues? Oh, my meringues? That wasn't a euphemism. How good are your meringues? Jeez, my meringues? That wasn't a euphemism. How good are your meringues?

Jeez, you've got great meringues. Oh, sweet, sweet. Show us your bare lives. I like your jacket, Bec. No one can see it, but I'll just... Thank you. It's great. It's Levi's.

It's a Levi's Pokemon collaboration. Okay, I'm going to track back a little bit on my compliment. Now I know exactly what it is. I just thought it was pretty colors. Oh, no. Now I'm an embarrassing nerd. I like your tattoo, though. Yeah.

I haven't seen it. Oh, no, don't explain what it is. Okay, don't explain what it is. Oh, I like it less now. Pokemon, Pokemon. No, it's cool. Oh, I like it less now. Pokemon, Pokemon.

No, it's cool. It's a horse in a flat cap and an interesting tweed combo, but short-sleeved tweed jacket. Actually, a fun story goes along with that tattoo, Geraldine. Back when Beck was working at the project, they had a story. How do you know this? You remember things I say. I? You remember things I say. I don't remember things I say. I rely on no one remembering anything I say.

There was a quirky story, I think, that was like a backup and it never quite made the air. And it became almost like mythical and legendary around the writer's room. And eventually it never made the air, butck didn't want to let it go so she immortalized it on her arm in the form of a tattoo tattoo no could you please say tattoo as if there's gonna be 250 pipers coming down the cobblestones any minute now uh scottish tattoo geez we got the scots on the brain why not not? It's a wonderful country. You're Scottish, aren't you, Geraldine?

My mother's Macallum, yeah. Macallum? Don't give away your mother's maiden name, Geraldine. It's not any of my secret questions. Mine is. No one would guess my mother's maiden name. I think I could. It's secure.

Do you think so? Yes. It's secure. Do you think so? Yes. It's secure. You've never let it slip? Is it Monroe or Smith? It's neither of those. That's the trick.

Does it start with a K? It does start with a K, but I'm not saying anything else about it. I'm going to do it. I want you to get dog. I want all your passwords. Was your mum Richard Kind? Canuple. Richard Kind. Is that your mum?

I wish. No, my mum's lovely. But Richard Kind. Oh, Richard Kind. Oh, imagine. Imagine your mum is Richard Kind. That would change things. Change things for Richard as well.

All of a sudden, imagine that, having Richard kind as your mum. Oh, my God. I think that a jib is just a fancy stick. And we all need to face up to this. It's Evan just with a big stick. He just swings it around the studio. I am just entering my macros in my app. Are you really?

I really am. I would say... I did an ignorant call from my dad. It might have been important. I think it's just to say happy birthday. It probably is that. Evan, I would say that a lot of people, you get better results with a carrot than a stick. Probably is that. Evan, I would say that a lot of people, you know,

you get better results with a carrot than a stick, okay? So I reckon next time you're doing a shoot in the studio. Use a carrot. Use a carrot. Putting a carrot on the end of the jib actually is a great idea. I would look at the camera a lot more. Do you have trouble with that? Yeah, I'm like, I had no reason to look at that.

Delicious carrot. There it is. I have trouble with that? Yeah, I'm like, I had no reason to look at that. Delicious carrot. There it is. I have trouble. I don't have that problem because what I find in the rare times I've been allowed on television, and please put me on more often. I'm lovely. If television is listening. I'm a cabaret.

If Reg Grundy is listening. I'm a cabaret artist, so I tend to look down the barrel too much. Because I want to make eye contact. Yes. Yeah. What's up with cats in the cradle and the silver spoon little boy blue man in the moon you okay you're gonna cry no because i don't understand any of the words it's all to me is just like it's just like someone saying purple hippo in a hat where you go look at that it's about fatherhood and it's about the relationship between son and father.

I think it's just random words. No. Music is interpretable. No, it is about father and son relationship. No, I think it's about. The verses seem more clear, but the chorus particularly is a bit more abstract. I think it's a cat. But that's like the nursery rhyme that you tell to your child.

Oh, I thought it was just a cat in a bassinet. No. A cat's cradle is like the string thing you tell to your child. Oh, I thought it was just a cat in a bassinet. No. A cat's cradle is like the string thing you do with your hands. No, cats can sleep. You're just being obdurate now. I am. No, no. I just am.

At first I wasn't. You're being contrary. No, no. I've leaned into the goofs. I'll admit it. Beckery, Beckery, quite contrecry. That's where Beck lives there. Yeah, that's true.

Okay, so don't come around to her house and say, what? Don't dox me. Okay, I'm nearly done. I won't, but Beck lives. And I'm glad she does. Don't you dare tell them I live in the moment. Don't dox me. Don't dox where I am glad she does. Don't you dare tell them I live in the moment. Don't dox me. Don't dox where I am all the times.

Thanks, Matt Stewart. Is there being a lot more clapping in the initial episodes? You can't say porpoise. Something's happened to me. Poip, poipus. Poor. Poor. Piss.

Poipus. No, piss. It's easy to say if you're not looking at it. Yeah, right. Porpoise. Porpoise. You're overthinking the second syllable. Porpoise, yeah. It does look if you're not looking at it. Yeah, right. Porpoise. Porpoise. You're overthinking the second syllable. Porpoise, yeah.

It does look like porpoise, but it's not. Porpoise. Porpoise. Or in French, porpoise. The other one I really struggle with is canal. Canal? Canal. Everyone struggles.

Canal. Canal. Everyone struggles. Everyone struggles with anal. Yeah. Canal. Canal. Canal. Canal. Canal. Canal. canal canal everyone struggles everyone struggles with anal yeah can anal canal canal canal but it doesn't look like if you look at it it looks like how about how do you go with cabal cabal

canal cabal oh cabal could help me there actually it's any time that a cabal has ever helped anybody hey i don't know what i was gonna say about that Hey wait a second What about this cabal?