Who Knew It with Matt Stewart - 82 - Dave O'Neil, Jess Perkins and Suren Jayemanne

Episode Date: April 8, 2024

Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features comedians Dave O'Neil (Somehow Related/Full Frontal/Comedy Legend), Jess Perkins (Do Go On/Triple J) and Suren Jayemanne (Good Tucker/Drier, Drier)!Check out Matt's stand up special FREE on YouTube: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhESupport the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!See the podcast/Matt live: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/Check out Matt's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/Theme song by Evan Munro-Smith and Logo by @muzdoodles! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh my god, can you believe it? It's the year 2024. It's Melbourne Comedy Festival and we've just moved venues. We're at the Grace Darling now. We had a great run at the Chinese Museum selling out shows by the end, but now we need you to come over to the Grace Darling and shows are at 7.15. It's going to be so much fun. Love to see you there. Let's have a beer. Use discount code DOGOON. The show is called Dry a Dry at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Then we're going to Sydney and Brisbane. Tickets to all that stuff is on sale now. And you can find those tickets and details at mattstuartcomedy.com. Welcome to Who Knew It with Matt Stewart, the show where the guests write the wrong answers.

I'm the titular Matt Stewart and our first guest is comedian and host of the Do Go On podcast is Jess Perkins. Oh hello. I thought for a second you were talking about yourself. Oh okay yeah. To be honest. So I was like okay. Oh yeah I guess in some ways I'm also the host of that show.

Yeah. Our second guest is comedian and host of SBS's Good Tucker at Surin-Joy Manor. Hello. Good Tucker? Is that how you answer the phone? I like it. Yeah, he's actually... Well, hello! We're surprised. And our third guest is a first timer on the show and has the record for most guest appearances

on Spicks and Specks. He was also the bass player for the jangle pop group Captain Coco and the second comedian I ever saw live, it's comedy legend Dave O'Neil. Oh yeah, could you came to the high five part in you know somewhere? Yeah, the unfit for life show. Yeah. Wasn't a great show by memory. The thing I remember most. I showed videos. I don't, I played the bass. I'm most, yes and you came out with a rose between your teeth. And sang air supply. Yeah Yeah, that was my peak it do you remember who was on before me and who was on after me I

Only think I learned this later, but they'll be gags. I'm a mighty bush and Johnny Vegas. Yeah It was so funny. Alright, so the way the show works is I ask a relatively obscure trivia question and our contestants have to write a convincing fake answer. I then read their answers as well as the real one and they have to guess which one is correct. The first question comes from a guy called Lars van Kuverden from Utrecht in the Netherlands. And his question is, are any of you Tolkien fans? My wife and kids are but I've seen the movies.

Yeah, well if you happen to know the answer for any question, just play it like you don't. Okay. And just still send in a fake answer or whatever. Anyway, question is, in JRR Tolkien's Middle Earth Universe, what does Mathem mean? what does mathem mean? What does mathem mean? I mean, yeah, I've read the books but not that much of a fan. Yeah, yeah.

No, no, no. I speak it fluently. While they're writing their answers, I'll explain how the scoring works. So you get a point if your fake answer is guessed by another contestant. point if you correctly guess the answer and by the way I'm also playing as the house I've put in two of my own fake answers for each question And I get a pet I get a point for each one of those that I guess choose So each of us can scrub to three points per round which seems fair, but the probability actually favors me the house

Which is why the contestants get triple points in the final round anyway our questions come from our great patreon supporters And if you want to submit a question sign up on any level of all of them Wow Patreon.com slash to go on pod which is linked in the show notes. He's really listening the Netherlands. Yeah Yeah, he didn't make that up well enjoy some drop today. Maybe that's Dutch licorice. I expect everyone to know Salty licorice enjoy Enjoy some drop. All right. Are all the questions in? All of the answers are in here. Here is question number one.

In JRR Tolkien's Middle Earth Universe, what does mathem mean? A naturally occurring stone found in the mountains often used to make jewellery. A term to address respected elderly women used by the Balrogs, a demonic species who speak with a lisp. Objects that a hobbit was gifted and has no use for but is unwilling to throw away. Oh yeah, they do hoard a bit.

It's like the hobbit version of Brickerbrack. Yeah, exactly. Yes. Then you've got, uh, it's Middle Earth's equivalent of math. For example, dildo Baggins was known... Dildo Baggins was a known... Dildo Baggins. Mathematic. Is it dildo Baggins? No, it's Bilbo. Okay.

I feel, I'm like, I feel like I would have known it. I would have heard about that. That's just an example. That's just an example. He's uncle. That could be Bilbo. Yeah, Bilbo's uncle. Don't talk about him.

He's a bit dodgy. Uncle Dildo. Uncle Dildo. A despised relative that is befriended in the hopes of getting a part of the inheritance or thinking about maths. Math. That's a Hobbit term. So you've got naturally occurring stone, a term to address respected elderly women,

a gift that has no use but they keep anyway. The dildo baggins is a mathematic. A despised relative that is befriended in the hopes again part of the inheritance or thinking about maths. Math um. But only in Middle Earth. Yeah, it's in Middle Earth. Middle Earth maths. What do you think, Jess?

Um, they're all very good, can I just say. Obviously leading towards dildo Baggins? Yes. I think I'm I'm torn between The first one like a precious stone or or like Stuff you don't need the bric-a-brac bric-a-brac bric-a-brac thing I think I'm gonna go with stuff. You don't need or whatever. However, it was worded bric-a-brac I think it's funny that they real human word is stupider than the hobbit word. Yes. Alright.

Everyone's got a junk draw, you know? Even hobbits. The draw down. The Jim Owens bit, wasn't it? Yeah, and yeah, yeah. Yeah, you're right. The song, man. The song, yeah.

I'd say the stone. Stone. Alright, welcome that in for Dave. What do you think, Seren? Was that precious gemstone or something? Yeah, yeah, I think it's the brick of Brack as well brick of Brack. Yeah. All right Here's who wrote the answers thinking about maths math. Um, that was Dave Despised relative it's befriended in the hopes of getting the inheritance. That was Lars. Okay the house

It's befriended in the hopes of getting the inheritance that was Lars aka the house The house also wrote the one about the the demons who with a lisp that was pretty fun. Is it like that's a good one Hello, Mathem like madam Excuse me Mathem doesn't quite work because you don't whisper day. Do you anyway? Um, then we got dildo back and that was Seren You don't say Was it I'm Brent the books I know there's uh dildo back in those serenity. You don't say Huh, was it the i'm read the books, I know there's no dildo back Uh Naturally occurring stone which dave went for that was just perkins. Oh wow Yeah, yeah, that was clever Jess also said she was considering a little fake out by jessie. Yeah. Wow

clever. Jess also said she was considering it as well. A little fake out by Jess. For me that felt... It's like a poker. That was sneaky. That was right on the edge of... It's a poker play. Yep. That means that Jess and Serenna correct the Brick-a-Brack one. Is that what it is? Yeah. Mathem. Mathem? I mean yeah you're right it sounds silly but so does Brick-a-Brack so fair enough. So that means that Jess gets two points and Saran gets a point as well, so you and me, Dave, off to a rough start. Zero, it's alright, we'll come back. That's, I've maxed out at sneakiness too by the way. You can't, it's hard to use that.

That could be the sneakiest thing you do. Yeah, yeah, the double sneak. Yeah, we'll know next time. Question two comes from Jason Westner from Chester Springs in Pennsylvania. And the question is, which one of these is a real species of bird? Ooh.

So you just gotta come up with a made up, probably a little bit silly sounding bird species. While you're writing your answers, here's some more info on mathems. Lars writes, most hobbit dwellings are crowded with Mathems. Mathems are often re-gifted and might end up with the original owner or in a Mathem house which is basically a museum.

Most weapons are considered Mathems since only an insane hobbit would use them on an adventure. There's a lot of clutter when you think back to those movies. A lot of clutter, a lot of Mathems. They've actually just opened up Hobbit Town. You can go inside the, they've set them all up and you can go in and have a tour. Whereabouts? In Wellington. Oh, that's fun. Hobbit Town. Cause you're saying your family's big fans? Yeah, I went to New Zealand for the last, the, I was still on radio and I went to the screening of the last movie in

Wellington and my wife came we had a baby she he came as well and and my mother-in-law the radio station didn't pay for all these people those pay for me anyway we were we had a great time because there was no it was before mobile phones was that long ago mobile phones weren't really big and so they could you just be down like in Wellington you'd see oh my god there's Gandalf walking around and there's you know Vigo and and mobile phones were around because I was interviewing one of the hobbits in the hotel room and it's a very casual hotel and then Liv Tyler yeah she comes in

she goes um oh there's some fans downstairs I said yeah there's about four of them she goes should I go down I'm like yeah yeah why not go down they'd love to see you so she goes down then I give you this guy and I come out and look and some security guy goes yeah there's an issue downstairs 200 people of style live Tyler to be mobbed I advise her to go down there that'd be great get down there she died again all right. Go mingle, it'll be nice! She died. I've never seen him again. Anyway.

Alright, so here is question two. Which of these are real species of bird? The Canadian shrewjob, the Atticus finch, golden thwack, rough-faced shag, pimple-bellied plum sucker, or maroon-headed tit. Wow. Oh, wow. Yeah, I'm lost in those. Yeah. Can we have them once again please? Sure. Canadian shrew job, the Atticus finch, golden thwack, rough-faced shag, pimple-bellied plumsucker or maroon-headed

tit. I think it's your go here first Dave. Oh, rough-faced shag. I think it's so ridiculous. It's probably true. Yeah, maybe I reckon you think like they could have had a naming competition or something like that and then come up with Atticus Finch Yeah, it's a great name isn't it? Yeah Atticus. Could be that or it could be I kind of am leaning towards the brown headed tit or whatever Maroon headed tit or maroon headed tit There are tit or maroon headed brown headed tit or whatever. Yeah, there are. Maroon headed tit or maroon. There are tit, there are.

Because there are tippets. Yeah, there are. Yeah, there are, absolutely. Yeah, maybe I'll go with maroon headed tit. Maroon headed tit for Saran. All right, that leaves you Jess. Well, I was gonna go for Atticus Finch, but now I'm not sure if Saran's doing what I just did.

He's pulling the Jess, you reckon? Oh. Which is a fantastic move. Yeah. But I'm gonna go Atticus Finch. I don't even necessarily think it's true but I want it to be true because it is such a great name and Atticus is a great character. Gregory Peck. Oh my god. Atticus Finch is the lawyer. Yes. Atticus. And that movie is about a bird as well isn't it? A mockingbird. A mockingbird. Oh go on. Alright here's where I wrote the answers. Jason aka the house wrote both the pimple-bellied plum sucker and the Canadian shrew job

Which is a deep cut pun on a wrestling Controversy from the 90s called the Montreal screw job. Oh, that's good. Wow Some fine work from Jason. Did you know that? I knew it because I did a report on it on Do Go On. Oh there you go, that's what he's done. He's heard you talk about it. Right. That's clever. Golden Thwack. That was Dave. That's good Dave. You picture that's the noise it would make. That's its unique call. When it hits a window. The Golden Thwack. The Golden Thwack is fantastic. The Atticus Finch.

That was Saran. Yeah. Ah, your opinions. That's really good. It's good stuff. I didn't know that I had to do it. You would have just picked it anyway. I wouldn't have wasted it.

Yeah, you didn't even have to. You almost hurt yourself with it. I wasted my one sneakiness. Oh no. The Maroon or Maroon-Headed Tit, which Sar Saran went for was Jess. So she got you right back there. And that means Dave is right, it's a rough face shang. Oh, good one. Got one right. So point to Jess, point to Dave, point to Saran. Question three comes from Connor Schmidt from Perth, Western Australia. Connor's actually the editor of this show. That- That feels like nepotism to me.

Is that what it is? He's also- Cronyism, I guess. Yeah, he's also my uncle. He's also my son. He's also my son. Connor. Connor's question is,

what tradition does Major League Baseball Team the Milwaukee Brewers hold after the top of the sixth inning of every home game? They have a tradition. Get the crowd going. Oh, okay. Yeah okay, yeah sure. Okay, yeah. Can you say the question one more time? What tradition does Major League Baseball team the Milwaukee Brewers hold at the top after the top of the sixth

inning of every home game? They get the crowd going. Yeah, something to get them involved. Reminds me of the time that I was asked to go on at halftime of the football. I've got a request from via management. Dress as a giant credit card and lead the crowd in Mambo number 5. Is that true? Yeah! I almost did it just to turn up and get dressed in a giant credit card. I still remember it was an Essendon Collingwood game. Could you imagine? That would have been a huge crowd as well.

Alright everyone we're going to the Mambo number 5! All those plastic bottles being thrown at my head. One, two, I loved it. That's so funny. Three, four, five, I love that song. I can tell you quickly about the Rough Face Shag. It's actually a New Zealand bird. Oh!

Okay, it's also known as the New Zealand King Shag or the Kawau. Oh wow. They've got some good birds over there. When I went there I went to the the zoo and saw a Kiwi. Oh yeah, they're cool looking. They look like they're cartoon. Just looking at the other animals. You would have seen a few. They're nocturnal though. It was all dark in his cage. Yeah, I didn't realize they were nocturnal.

I didn't realize they were nocturnal. Well, maybe I'm making that up. It was a long time ago. Oh, man, I don't know anything about them. Birds. I don't know why I would be surprised. Challenging. I probably thought I saw a dodo, but I know they're extinct. I get those two confused. They're similar, right? Big chunky. Oh, cute dodos.

Right, the answer in for question number three. What tradition does Major League Baseball team the Milwaukee Brewers hold at every home game? The visiting team's head coach is goaded into competing in a short home run derby with the Brewers main mascot, Bernie Brewer. Oh. They get the crowd to do the Macarena. Milly Vanilli head out onto the diamond

to mime to their hit girl. I'm gonna miss you a race between five mascots shaped as various anthropomorphic sausage varieties Two people are picked from the crowd to have a running race against the team mascot Oh, or they pick which brewer then brewers yeast will be harvested to make that week's batch of Milwaukee's equivalent of Vegemite known as Wockymite. Wow.

See now the Carlton United breweries, Yeah, the yeast. They use their yeast to make Vegemite. So. Yep, yep, yep. Possible. Obviously Milwaukee's got Wockymite. Yep, yep, yep. Possible. Obviously Milwaukee's got Wokymite. And they've brought that into their home games.

Of course they do. Yeah, makes sense. Each week it's a different recipe. So there's two different race-related ones there. Yeah, one with sausages. I word it that poorly. I mean like a running race. Yes.

So you've got the, I love how every home game the visiting head team, team's head coach is goaded into competing. They must know it's coming. Surely, it happens all the time. Then you got the Macarena, Milly Vanilli Miming, the Sausage Race, or the random people from the Crowdracing the Mascot, or the Brewers' Youth being chosen for Wockymite.

Your go, Saran, what do you think? Yeah, I mean, there's usually races at these things, I think. It is the most boring option, though. And I feel like the reason they're submitting the question is because there must be something interesting. Be weird. Anthropomorphic sausages in a race? Yeah, so that's like just-

I don't know what that means. That means it's like sausages with faces. Oh, yeah. Yeah, so that's like just I don't know what that means. That means it's like Sausages with faces. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's that one You were you really camera around there I can picture it. All right. I also think it's sausage rice sausage rice Yeah, what do you think? Okay the yeast? Yeah, I just don't know. It's I thought it might be the mascot race But that's just too normal. Yeah, sausages. No the other one. Oh the other one. Yeah. I'll go the yeast, why not? Alright, here's the answers. Getting goaded into racing against word answer, that was dope.

It was quick. Milly Vanilli, mimeing, that was the house. Two people being picked from the crowd to have a running race, that was Jess Perkins. Yeah, pretty boring. Walkie Mite, that was Saren. They went for that. Felt for that.

Meaning the sausage race was correct. Oh wow. Okay. Every. Meaning the sausage race was correct. Oh wow. Okay. Every game, big sausage race. So Jess, one point, Saran, two points that round. Well done. So after three rounds, we've got the house still yet to score, Dave, on one point.

But out in front on four points a piece, it's Jess and Saran. Oh. There we go. Here's question number four, comes from Sean from Sky in Victoria. What was a real Canadian headline on the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation's news website

on the 17th of April, 2017? Okay, just a news headline. News headlines in Canada. Yep. 17th of April, 2017. While you're writing your answers, here's a little more info on the sausage race. According to Connor, having been around since the 90s,

this has endured for so long due to Wisconsinites love for a bloody good grill up. Fans will famously arrive hours before games to tailgate in the ballpark's car park to char up some brats and punch down a couple of cold ones. When I got into baseball a few years back and was looking for a team to follow, I saw one sausage race live while watching a Brewers game. The fact that this ridiculous event was so beloved by fans was genuinely one Of the main factors that swayed me into joining the brew crew Bonus fact the chorizo sausage mascot definitely isn't racist

Don't even bother looking it up because it definitely isn't a racist stereotype or anything. Okay, a bit defensive there So it's Spanish or Mexican. Yeah, more like a sombrero on. Yeah. I reckon. Geez, that wouldn't be great for a race, a sombrero. That'd be like the least very drag heavy. He also says FTC, which I don't know what that means. But anyway, while you're still running your answer, let's go for a quick break. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like when our estrogen levels

drop during menopause, causing the risk of heart disease to go up. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. All right, and we're back. So here's question number four. What was the real news headline in Canada on the 17th of April, 2017? Ranchers stunned as beaver herds 150 cattle. Wow.

Moose gets voted in as mayor. Yep. Oh, yep. Crisis in Calgary as calisthenics catastrophe causes critical casualties. Oh my God. That's great! Wow! Multi-car accident on highway. All drivers apologize to each other. That's funny. Body found in boot about 5pm when car flips at roundabout turns out to be a bootlicker.

Roundabout, sorry, okay. Let me help myself to kill it there. Body found in boot about 5pm when car flips at roundabout turns out boot a boot 5 p.m. When car flips at round a boot turns out to be bootleger I'm gonna eat the boot. I get it. Yes or Mountie uncovers drug bounty in Alberta County All of those Like when the sub it is cut sub editors coming up with them. They're high-fiving each other for that I reckon. I think we all got the task here. We understood the job.

So back to you, Jess. Poor. Can I have him again, please? Rancher Stundas, Beaver Herds, 150 cattle. Yep, that is appealing. Moose gets voted in as mayor. So is that. Crisis in Calgary, as calisthenics catastrophe

causes critical casualties. Multi- accident on highway all drivers apologize for each other. Body found in a boot a boot 5 p.m. when car flips it round a boot turns out to be boot liquor or Mountie uncovers drug bounty in Alberta County. I'm gonna go with the Beaver one. I think maybe they have surprisingly good herding instincts. I think they're descendant of border collies. Aren't they the ones who, they sort of herd timber and stuff to their fans. They've got a good eye for it. They're cool. I'm a big Beaver fan.

I love watching them, they're good. I'll go the Mountie one. I only think, because Calistinx is Australian. I think it's an Australian invention. Is it? Pretty sure. I'm very proud Mountie one. Yeah, I only think as calisthenics is Australian right? I think it's an Australian invention Is it pretty sure I'm very proud of that then I'm sure I love anything we invent it is and it's have you seen it I've done these with them. It's a bit weird. Yeah sport the streamers and stuff. Yeah, right marching It's yeah, it's kind of it's got like a gymnastic element. Yes, but a dance element to it You want to say that growing up, out in the burbs.

My sister-in-law did it deep into her 20s. Oh wow. Alarming. To the point where people are like, are we sure we are? To the point where it's like, is there an age group for you? There's enough of you to, OK. This is our heritage. Shouldn't you be a leader now? Coach? She's in seniors.

Yeah. Like golden. Yeah. And my brother's like still doing the concerts huh okay yeah no of course I'll be there absolutely cool all right I think that just leaves you Saran that's I've had that exact conversation with my brother accounting, okay? Are you an accountant? Yeah, I am. Oh my god. I'm in the grammar school though. Yeah, that's Uncle WithBuddyNas and... Oh yeah, Dill. Dill, Lemo.

There is a bit of a thing. Then we hit Lemo and it drops off the... The theme there. Yeah, that's wow. That is... There's a few accountants in comedy. It's amazing. That is one of the...

Husey did accountancy too for a bit. Did he? One year. Yeah, okay. You were teaching? Yeah, in public relations. Which isancy to for Yeah, okay. Yeah, you were teaching is that yeah, which is another big? Yeah, yeah, yeah a lot of teachers heaps of teachers. Yeah, it's I mean countin may know glad Robbins. Yeah, they Scott Paul collegiate a bit not then I yeah, yeah Make some sense. Yeah, I was there conditioning sales. Yeah, I think I'm a smaller group

Seren he knows a lot about an aircon we need Yeah, I Think I reckon that there was a guy whose surname was moose or a lady and that and they were trying to be clever I mean I'm moose so I'm gonna go with the Moose. Seren that's so clever. Locking that in for sure. That's why you're an accountant and I did arts and only just got in. Arts yeah I did arts too. I did arts too. Yeah this is I think you were saying your kids doing us. I think podcasting is in their future. Yeah. Yeah that'll waiting. Yeah Here's the right the answers crossing Calgary is calisthenics catastrophe causes critical casualties that was Sean Okay, the house and Sean is it is from Franks and sorry good

If that is an Australian thing The one that I butchered so sorry saran Soran, about the rounder boot and the boot that goes Soran. I wonder if they have boots over there, are they trunks? Probably. Oh, maybe. But I don't. To avoid confusion. Although Canada gets a lot of English terms. Manty Alton covers drug bounty in Alberta County. Dave went for that. That was The House. That's a good one, I love that. That is good.

I get, whenever one of these questions comes up, I get rhymezone.com out and see what I can come up with. Moose gets voted in as mayor, Saran went for that, that was Dave. Oh, well done. See, I'm not smart enough to do the alliteration. It's like, oh. And that means, oh sorry, multi-car accident on the highway,

all drivers apologize to each other was just Perkins I love it. Yeah, they're reporting on it, but in Canada news. They'd be like you know But that means Jess is correct ranchers stunned as beaver herds 150 cattle true. Yeah, wow Just as it paints a beautiful picture powerful beaver to just get out of his water and just wow. So point to Dave, point to Jess and a point to the house. The house is finally on the behoor. Oh, about time. So after four rounds we got the house on one point, Dave on two points, Serenna on four points, but out in front on five points is Jess Perkins. Here's question number five comes from Kate Iles from Canberra

in the Australian Capital Territory. The question is, which of these is a real car? So just give a make and model of a kind of obscure car. Sure. Like a pretty mainstream mate. It's like a Ford Laser. Yeah, like a Ford Laser only. It's, you know, slightly sillier than that, I guess.

While you're writing your answers, here's some more info about the herding beaver. This is from that CBC news article. Saskatchewan rancher Adrian Ivy may have heard of a beaver, but until now had never seen a beaver herd. Cattle that is, oh my God. What an opening paragraph. I haven't read this yet, so I was just as delighted

as you are, dear listener. On Friday, Ivy and her husband were surprised to see 150 of their heifers crowded together in one of their pastures. Curious about the strange behaviour, they investigated further to find the herd of cattle following a beaver that had wandered along. He was out and about, I guess he would have said. He was out in a boot, I think looking for a place to build a beaver lodge. And they were following him Ivy said. There was about to be, there was a boot to be three foot space around him. They didn't want to get closer than that. According

to Ivy, heifers are more inquisitive than the average bovine which may have led to them following the beaver. They're a curious bunch she said. They're kind of like teenagers and I think they were following this thing around because they couldn't figure out what the heck it was. Ivy thought the odd event was even more notable considering the beaver is Canada's national symbol. Oh, I didn't know that. Wow.

Yeah, I agree. Yeah, it is more notable. That is more notable. Yeah. All right, the answer for question number five, which of these are real car? Dodge Toretto, Honda Joy Machine, Kia Sporty Four Wheels, Holden Jupiter, Citroen Lemon, or Lamborghini Mancini.

Oh man. Wow. They are all very good. They all sound like dream machines. So I think we are back to you, Dave. So you got Dodge Toretto. Yeah, that one. Dodge Toretto.

I reckon that's real. Locked that in for Dave. What do you think, Srin? Can I get him one more time? Dodge Toretto, Honda Joy Machine, Kia Sporty Four Wheels, Holden Jupiter, Citroen Lemon, or Lamborghini Manchini. Citroen Lemon is very funny. I am gonna go with the Honda Joy Machine.

Honda Joy Machine. Yeah, so crazy, it could be true. Yeah. I'm gonna go for, what was the, Jupiter? Holden Jupiter. I'm gonna go with Jupiter. Yeah, I should drive one of them. All right, he's all right with the answers.

Lamborghini mankini was the house Citroen lemon that's good stuff. That was Kate Kate wrote Citroen pineapple and I really I took it to another level Did which was down one step but still I still cancel another level holding Jupiter which just went for that was Dave Good stuff Dodge Toretto which Dave went for that was just Okay, so ran wrote the key sporty four wheels good and Seren you picked the correct one Honda joy machine What a funny name for a car Toretto is Vin Diesel's character in fast of the furious. I've never seen that Could have been the Honda Lafamalia

Whatever his family in Italian. Who does a stand up about how the first part of the Furious is about pirated DVDs? That's the whole story. That is right. It is. Someone does a stand up about it. It's very funny about that. That's a whole criminal action is stolen DVDs. It's like what? There's an episode of The Sopranos where they they hijack a truck and They steal DVD players at the back of it, but it goes wrong and they shoot the guy. Oh, yeah I remember that. Which is like crazy. Just think about someone losing their life over DVD players.

DVD players. You just had to wait two years and you could find them in every op shop. And just get the TV shows free off the- Yeah. shop. And just get the TV shows free off the road. All right, question six, second last question. This comes from Justin McCain from Pittsburgh. And Justin's question is, on the 26th of July 1184, a while back, the Erfurt disaster occurred in Erfurt, Germany. What happened? What was the Erfurt disaster of 1184? While you're writing those answers, I'll tell the listeners quickly about the Honda Joy Machine. According to Kate, it was first built in 1999, the first generation. It was a version of the Honda HR-V.

Oh yeah. It was marketed to young couples who didn't need an expensive car, just one that was cheap to run and could go anywhere. Honda advertised it as the Joy Machine with only three doors and a boot area large enough for a mattress. They leaned into the name around, until around 2005 when they rebranded as just the Honda HRV. Oh man, just, they're really spelling it out,

saying, isn't that room for a mattress out the back, young couples? Get in the Joy Machine. The answers are in for question number six. What was the Erfurt disaster of 1184 happened in Erfurt? I'm probably not saying that right. ERFUT in Germany. A donkey stampede broke out at a pantomime,

killing seven people who were themselves dressed in two person arse costumes. Wow. That'd be great. How about seven of them? Wow. Yeah, it's a big, big show. Sauerkraut was discovered.

Wow. Notable? That's not a disaster. It's a matter of taste. If you're not at well, there you go. The entire nation's stockpile of gunpowder exploded, creating a mesmerizing fireworks display but also killing 150 people. The annual sausage festival caused a food poisoning disaster killing 8,547 people with

botulism. A second floor of a meeting hall collapsed into the cesspool underneath, drowning 60 nobles in human sewerage oh yeah or the wheat harvest was small that year so all of the bakeries had very low stock causing townsfolk to riot over pretzels a pretzel riot pretzel riot oh man I love a pretzel oh yeah when I discovered that pretzels weren't just the little dried things and and they're like big ones, I'm like, oh shit. Yeah, big bready ones, yeah. You like them?

Oh yeah, big fan of those. It's mainly because I don't eat meat, and at Oktoberfest, it was the only non-meat food. Yeah. It was either, you could either order half a chicken, a pork knuckle, or a pretzel. At least it's very filling. So after five days of drinking seven litres of beer a day,

and eating pretzels, It was pretty rough stuff. Who are we up to? We're up to you again, Saren. Donkey Stampede, Sour Crab Discovery, Gunpowder Explosion, Sausage Festival, Food Poisoning, Floor Collapsing, People Drowning in shit, or pretzel ride. The number was so specific for the donkey festival thing. No, no, that was the seven people. No, for the sausage festival.

For the sausage festival. Yeah, we had seven and 150. I just can't figure out the maths on the seven people because they're in pairs as an ass. Panto. Yeah, maybe, yeah, one of them was riding one of them. Oh yeah, okay. Yeah, maybe that's one. Maybe one horse was having a break. Yeah, maybe, yeah, one was riding one of them. Oh, yeah, okay. Yeah, maybe that's one.

Maybe one horse was having a break. Yeah. And so the ass of the ass had like wandered off to get a drink and it was just the... Two in the head of the ass. Yeah, it was the head of the ass. I don't know, that's just, that's one possibility. That sounds plausible. I'm going to lock in the... The... Donkey. Donkey festival. Oh, you're locked? Okay. Oh, maybe not after your response.

Yeah, that was quite a telling reaction, wasn't it? No, sorry. No, I'm gonna lock it in. Oh, really? Yeah, I'll lock it in. Lock it in? All right. I can't remember the rest.

The two. Yeah, there was the sauerkraut, gunpowder, sausage fest, meeting hall collapse, or pretzel riot. Yeah. Oh, maybe I'll go meeting hall collapse. Meeting hall collapse, okay. That maybe I'll go Meeting Hall collapse. Meeting Hall collapse, okay. That feels like they'd have that documented. Yeah I was gonna go Meeting Hall collapse. Yep. Or, but Soran's done it and you know it's getting to the pointy end.

I'll say Sausage Festival. Sausage Fest. Yeah. I'll go Pretzel Riot. Pretzel Riot. Alright locking that in. I predict a riot. Here's who wrote the answers. The donkey stampede with the pantomime, that was Justin and the house. Sauerkraut being discovered was a disaster according to Saren. More of a kimchi guy. Okay. Oh wow.

The gunpowder explosion, that was Justin, aka the house as well. Then we had Jess went for the sausage fest that was Dave yeah yeah well done Dave went for the pretzel right which was Jess we're in sync we're falling for each other's jokes Saran got the correct answer the the sewerage drowning couldn't couldn't think of a worse way for a noble to go. Wow. That does feel like the only one you would have records for 900 years later. You know what put me off at first?

I was like there's no way they had two-story buildings back then. I thought nah, they probably did. They put their meeting house over a cesspit. Yeah. It would stink. Yeah, no good. The medieval ages. Gross. So that means again that round we got Jess with one point, Dave with one point, and Sren with one point. So you're on means again that round we've got Jess with one point, Dave with one point, and Seren with one point. So you're on to the final round. It is truly anyone's game apart from the house who is failing pretty miserably. On one point then we've got Dave on four,

Seren on six out in front, is Jess on seven. So the final question, Dave, these will be your longest answer, it's a movie plot synopsis. So probably writing like three or four sentences Yeah, cuz I've been very short with my answers. Yeah, this one. It'll stand out a bit if it's not a little bit longer This one comes from Paige Carroll from Mesa in Arizona or Mesa Maybe and the question is what is the synopsis of the 2017 film Pottersville? What is the synopsis of the 2017 film Pottersville? While they're writing those answers, I'll quickly let the listeners know a bit about this disaster. According

to Justin, it was known as the Erfurt-Latrine disaster when on the 26th of July 1184, King Henry VI of Germany was in Erfurt mediation between two parties on the second floor of a meeting hall when the combined weight of the nobles caused the floor to collapse. It crashed through the first into the cesspool underneath of the building. A total of 60 noblemen drowned or died later due to injuries. King Henry was said to have survived by dangling onto a stone alcove and needed rescuing by ladder. Alright, answer in for the final question. What is the synopsis of the 2017 film Pottersville?

A group of Potters, traditionally rivals in their small town. I already know who wrote it. Banned together when a plastic factory is planned to open in Pottersville. They even want to change the name of the town to Plasticville. The movie reaches its crescendo when the Potters join forces to build a giant clay wall,

preventing the plastic factory starting construction. Wow. Love that. What a movie. That sounds great. You've been in a few movies like The Nugget. Yeah. Yeah.

Loves The Nugget. Take away. Take away. Take away. Yeah. No, I wrote Take Away with Marco Tull. Yeah, yeah, yeah. About the fish and ship shops. Yeah. Similar storyline. Take away. Yeah. No, I wrote take away with Marco Atul. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

About the fish and chip shops. Yeah. Similar storyline. Very similar. Funny that. Yeah. Here's your second option. In the whimsical town of Pottersville, everyone wakes up in the morning to find that all the

residents have magically transformed into anthropomorphic teapots. It's amazing how many times this show has the word anthropomorphic in it. As the townspeople struggle to navigate their new lives with spouts and handles, chaos ensues when the mayor declares a teapot beauty pageant to boost tourism. I'm a little teapot. Amidst the steamy competition, a quirky group of friends discovers an ancient tea leaf prophecy that holds the key to reversing the enchantment in the enchantment. Wow, if it's not enough. And restoring Pottersville to its normal non-tea thoughts. I'd probably love that.

Oh jeez, yeah. Sometimes you gotta kill your darlings, there's too many of these. Yeah, yeah, that's like a drug, just fever dream. Then third option, Maynard is beloved, is a beloved local businessman who is mistaken for the legendary Bigfoot during an inebriated romp through the town in a makeshift gorilla costume. The siding set off an international Bigfoot media spectacle and a windfall of tourism dollars for a simple American town hit by hard times. Oh. Then you got...

My bang. In the small town of Pottersville, mild-mannered librarian Alice accidentally mixes up a shipment of books with a box of magical potions. Chaos ensues as the townsfolk unknowingly start experiencing whimsical transformations, turning the local bingo night into a contest of who can hopscotch the longest and the mayor into a tap-dancing sensation. As Alice races to reverse the spell, Potter'sville embraces its newfound eccentricity, leading to a hilarious battle between the desire for normalcy and the charm of the unexpected.

Then you've got Stephen Potter, who was bullied as a child for his small frame and thick glasses, finds comfort in reading books about Harry Potter, another bespectacled child with the same last name as Stephen. As an adult, Stephen is an active member of the Harry Potter fandom groups and comes up with a plan to build his own Harry Potter themed neighbourhood for him and his fellow Potter fans to live in. Well finally, curmudgeon and retired factory worker Harry Potter, who shares his name with a fictional boy wizard, which causes plenty of confusion when a tour bus of eager nerds shows up expecting to see goblins and shit. Can Harry Potter make those nerds disappear?

Runtime 86 minutes. Wow. Let's see all those movies. Wow. Here are your options one more time, just I'll try and do it briefly. So you've got the Potters versus the Plastics. Yeah. You've got the, everyone turns into teapots. Thank you. You've got the guys mistaken for Bigfoot. You've got the magic mix up with the books. Yep. Yep. Easy to do. Yeah. Potions and books. Very easy to mix up.

Then you've got Steven Potter, who finds comfort in Harry Potter and those books. Or the guy who is Harry Potter, but he's a curmudgeon and wants to make those nerds disappear. Anyone want to jump in? I got Bigfoot. Bigfoot? I love it.

Well, all of them you could see, but I think, I don't know. I think Bigfoot. Bigfoot? I love it. All of them you could see but I think, I don't know, I think Bigfoot. I was thinking Bigfoot as well. My favourite was the teapots but that scene... That could be a thing though. The production values would be pretty hard to... Yeah. Unless it's animated.

It could be animated. But I do feel like Jess wrote that. I do like the idea of a teapot beauty pageant. That was a nice touch. Yeah, the swimsuit round. Yeah, talent round. Who'd be first to bust out? I'm a little teapot short and sound. Well if you go Bigfoot, I'll go teapot. I'm quite happy to go teapot. I love that one. Okay. I'll go teapot. Alright, so

Sarenz, are you going the Bigfoot then? Yeah, let's do Bigfoot. I'll go teapot. They've gone to Teapot. Because there could be, there were some whacked out kids movies in the 90s and stuff, like weird shit. Could have been coming on from the Beauty and the Beast, that famous Teapot, right? Yes! Yes! Spinoff movie. Yep. Spinoff. Yeah.

Absolutely. Yeah, there's the teacup ride at Disney. Yeah, true. Teacups exist. Teacups are big. If The Pirates of the Caribbean was all just based on a ride, maybe this is just the teacup ride at Disney. Yeah, teacups exist. The Pirates of the Caribbean was all just based on a ride. Maybe this is just the teacups. What do you think, Bob? I was gonna go Bigfoot too, but let's keep it interesting for the last round. I'll do something different, Bigfoot, and then yeah, the Stephen Potter is bullied and the curmudgeon.

Whose name is Harry Potter, I wanted to give it a nerd. Wait for 86 minutes. That's very funny. I'll go Potters vs Plastics. All right, lock that in for Jess. Here is who wrote the answers. The curmudgeon and retired factory worker Harry Potter that goes with

86 minutes. That was Serenjo Mana. Very good. Very good. The other Harry Potter one about the bullied Stephen Potter, that was Jess Perkins. The mix up with the magic, that was Paige aka The House. Big fan of Paige's writing there. Paige also the the teapot one oh yes you went for potters versus plastics that was Dave O'Neill I've only got one idea that means Bigfoot was that the one? that means Saran was correct it was Bigfoot Dave you had it Dave gave it up So that means Bigfoot was the one? That means Saran was correct, it was Bigfoot.

Oh God! Dave you had it! I gave it up! I gave it up! You gave it up! They would have given you the win Dave. I don't know, then yeah, then Pottersville means nothing. Yeah, I guess it's just the name of the place.

So that's a real movie. A real movie. Yeah, I looked that up. What year? 2017? I gotta look that up. I'm looking it up. Oh I mean Matt can probably tell us about it. I love Bigfoot.

I love the Yeti stories. Oh, it's got quite a cast. So he was inebriated in a makeshift gorilla outfit. That's a funny... Yeah, that's right. It's a very slim story line. Yeah. Could have weaved in all sorts of other things. Taking a page out of Page's book. Alright, I'll just, I'll figure out the scores in a second, but in the meantime, uh, it has a 14% critics rating on Rotten Tomatoes, but 65% audience. Oh, there you go. Audience likes it a lot more. Page writes,

The movie, this movie has a stacked cast, and it is such a fun and unexpected Christmas romp. There's a fake Bigfoot, small town shenanigans and a weird side plot of furries for some reason. Definitely a must watch with a bunch of dumb friends during the holidays. There's a last positive review by KT Schaefer on Substream magazine and they wrote, Pottersville is an undeniably bad movie, regardless of whether its script is... Oh, that's just poorly written. I don't think...

If you're going to review a movie about bad writing, you better get your writing right. Whether the script is self-aware or how good the acting is, it's an outlandish story that finds resolution by cribbing heavily from It's a Wonderful Life. All right, final score check. And the stack cast was who? Oh, I had just had it up on IMDB. Michael... Keaton?

No, Michael... Mosley. Shannon. Oh. Oh, I love Michael Shannon. Ron Perlman's in it. Ron Perlman's awesome. Judy Greer, who always plays Sassy Best Friend.

Yeah, that's a... Christina Hendricks. That's a stack cast. Yeah. Oh my god, Christina Hendricks. Yeah. Wow, good cast. Yeah, it's quite a cast.

Mad Men, that's Christina Hendricks from Mad Men. Yeah. Yeah, right, great. Yeah, Thomas Lennon, a lot of faces you'd know as well. Thomas Lennon's in a lot of stuff. Greta Lee, who's like quite, she's huge now. Ron Perlman was on, when I went to see the Craig Ferguson show, he was one of the guests on it.

Was he good? He was pretty good, he told her like a, it's like a bad joke, off-color joke that got edited out. The whole audience was like, eugh. Eugh, wrong. Wrong. What was he there, was he on the um... I think it was from the Bot...

The Pottersville promo too. It was, I think it was that and the motorbike show. Was he on a motorbike show? Oh, Sons of Anarchy. Oh, he's great in that. Um, alright, final score check. In fourth place on two points, it's the house. In equal second place on seven points a piece, it's Jess and Dave.

Woo! Meaning that out in front, is this your first ever win on nine points of Syringyamana? There we go! Thank you very much. Gifted by Dave, let's be honest. Stephen Bradbury over the line there. Is that your first win? No, I think I beat David Astle.

Oh, that's right. I try hardest when there's I think I beat David Astle. Oh, that's right I try hardest when there's a famous day Beat him. Yeah, he's like an intellectual Surround me with swimmer. Yeah an intellectual Dave's in the room. Wow So where can people find you sir and? Yes, sir and comedy Melbourne Comedy Festival, Brisbane Comedy Festival Sydney Comedy Festival The dates are all online but dry a dryer with Matt Stewart's gonna be a lot of fun Yes, sorry comedy Melbourne Comedy Festival, Brisbane Comedy Festival, Sydney Comedy Festival The dates are all online but Dry a Dry with Matt Stewart's gonna be a lot of fun

Awesome. Yeah this one this episode this is coming out on the 8th of April the day that your show opens day Yeah, come and see that at the mobile comic fest. I'm also doing Brisbane in Ladish May and Newcastle. I'm taking my special there on the 11th May because they've got cameras and stuff Have you done is that your first special? Yeah. Yeah, cuz specials weren't a thing when I started Yeah, well, you just did TV spots No one did a special the only special yet you'd heard of was like Eddie Murphy or no Aussies And if they did I would DVD or yeah, I'm on a car baron would do them But they're just the big guys that could afford cameras and then I'd sell them at shows. Yeah, like Jemona Calbaran would do them, but just the big guys that could afford cameras and that.

And then they'd sell them at shows. Yeah, and service stations. So my generation, yeah, we never did them, like, but then of course the next generation all started doing it. Like, yeah, I mean, Hughzy would have done one. Yeah, absolutely. But no, I'm just going to put mine up on YouTube. Yeah, great.

That's what I do. Yeah. What about you, Jess? And I put myself in the same category as you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I did. That's what about you, Jess? And I put myself in the same category as you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I did. That's what our tier of comedians do, Dave. Exactly.

Well, we... Duga One has a web series out. By the time this comes out, I think it's out or it's coming. Oh, wow. Right? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's either just dropped or it's mid-series or it's around. And it'll be coming out weekly.

Yeah, that's right. It's a quiz show we recorded last year. We've done the quiz show at the Comedy Festival a couple of years in a row. It's really fun format, mostly because Dave does all of the work. He's the- Dave Warnocky. Dave Warnocky.

Another famous Dave. Another intellectual Dave. We're surrounded by him. He's the host. We're the team captains. We've got some great guests, Soren's on an episode. Wow.

So yeah, go watch that. It's on Stupid Old Stupidos channel on YouTube. That's a great tip. Thanks so much for listening everyone. Hey, why don't you follow us on social media? We're at, I changed it so it's easy to follow. It used to be WKIWMS or something. Now it's who knew it pod love

it and follow me on there at Instagram Twitter Facebook give us a five star review if you want tell your friends if you think you know anyone who might enjoy it any Captain Coco fans you know send it this way absolutely thanks so much for joining us you three and cheers for tuning in to who knew it with Matt Stewart now that you know it I've been Matt Stewart goodbye Anyway and so and then Johnny Vegas was just like yeah, he was great, but he was doing the clay Yes sculpting so you couldn't do it now, so he what would he do he he did clay at TAFE or whatever you know pottery big fat guy he's an actor now more than a stand-up and then he would get a girl out of the audience who I thought was a plant but it wasn't because I saw him

every night they're always different women and he would do the scene from Ghost on the pottery will all my true love and they play that song but he would get clay all over them like this woman's outfit would be ruined. It's like, you could not do that now. It was like, bizarre. It was like... That first one though, obviously that's just like a plant, but then the next one was a different... Oh my god. She had dinner reservations afterwards. It's like, I can't go. You got clay on you. But, um, he was very... Oh, he was so funny. Anyway. That's a dream line up. Oh yeah.

Yeah, they were great. Well, I mean obviously. Me in the middle. In the middle. Yeah, sure. Everyone's going there for a while. I'm there for Dave. Yeah, yeah.

Mighty Boosh. I'll get there early and see the Mighty Boosh. Yeah. Maybe I'll save it later. Well, Mighty Boosh weren't on TV. They hadn't done their series yet. Was that, that was the year they won the best award? Yeah, it was a funny show.

Really funny. Who's the show after Johnny Vegas there's just a lady stuck to a chair yeah yeah my wife's a big fan of Lord of the Rings loves Vigo who's Aragon looking guy okay I'm more of a... You're I'm sure, I'm trying to go, Frodo. You love Gimli. Gimli. Oh, the dwarf! Yeah, I think his name is Giblets, but it's Gimli.

He's a Welsh. That's quite a while. He's a Welsh actor. Is he? Yeah, I don't know if you... Then what happened, so you'd sit in this conference room with like five other journalists in inverted commas, but they're all really different types There was a shock jock from New Zealand and then there was like a nerd from the one ring website

And so you get gandalf in there so Ian McKellen and he would I would say something like oh What we know about this and whatever general question and then this nerd would go in the third scene of the third meeting When you're holding the staff, did you really get in there? He go oh And in the New Zealand shock jock would ask every man the same question what do you think of New Zealand pussy the look on his face was just like what what do you think of New Zealand pussy it does feel like you could get away with it in a Kiwi accent. Yeah, it's an innocent accent. All the hobbits were laughing along with him and then once Ian came in and the dwarf guy didn't like it either. He's like, he didn't like that question. Gimli. Yeah,

it would have been like, what are you, what are we doing here? Well, so you're he's named Gimli and you're like I thought it was giblets. Hmm, but then dildo is too far Yeah, well dildo stood out to me because it has another meaning with giblets Hey, you know Dave the day this episode comes out is actually the day your festival show In the eighth of the night of April Right. Yeah, glad you clarified that with me the eighth. Yeah, come along good one. Where are you on? These are like sin fed square. Oh, great. It's good grades range of beers as well. Yeah Yeah, yeah, they got a big TV downstairs. You can watch the football. Yeah But you can watch the footy before the guy

You can watch the football. Yeah, I don't like a bush, but you can watch the footy before the guy The guy before me sold out he's a New Zealand comic so he'll go on to be mighty push and who's on after me Come on, maybe Sam Taunton. Oh, yeah, well, he's gonna be the next Johnny Vegas They've got a lot of common very similar. They similar white. He's got a yeah, I've been talking to him about his show taunts He's got a yeah, I've been talking to him about these show taunts. He's got a clay Hate the time it's been done He's already got the wheel in there I've seen it Done the tape call Yeah, the woman has to sign a permission form now

Doing what Johnny Vegas did Do you write for Jim Owen? Yeah, absolutely. I write some of the songs. Not that one though. Amazing It's good fun a detachable toe. Yeah Didn't write that. No, I'm trying to think of what sketches I did write Oh god, I wrote the giant check one where he got he got pay He won a giant check at a charity thing then he went got a giant bank note from the bank a giant ice cream It was good because you like whimsical stuff. Yeah. Yeah, that's the only one I can remember Yeah, it was good fun

I'm looking through my phone to find a picture of a pretzel. I got in the US that was bigger than my head Not a fan of the pretzels though Dave? No, not really. Look at that, Dave. Wow. You know what, I've got a kitty flown again, because again, I do a podcast with her about junk food, junkies. She loves a chocolate covered pretzel. Oh, I've never had a chocolate covered pretzel.

Oh, they're little. They're little, but she's mad for it. So much so that the chocolate box used to use real chocolate and they started using compound chocolate and she wrote a letter to them or something. I love getting so angry that you write a letter to a company. How dare you. Good lord. So no I'm not yeah I don't mind the yeah anyway the chocolate ones are nice but I have to be honest I never really had one of that I've had I should try one of those.

Bit of butter on them so good they got salt on them. It's just bread isn't it? Yeah I love bread. It's just hot bread. I love bread. Yeah and it's often like they'll they might serve it with a little bit of mustard or something. Oh yum. It's just hot bread. I love bread. Yeah. And it's often like they might serve it with a little bit of mustard or something. Oh yum. It's actually pretty nice. Yeah, it's nice. Do you ever do catfish? Yeah.

They do them there with mustard and butter and stuff. I haven't done it for a long time, but yeah, they also do filling cheese steaks. They do, yeah, same place, yeah. Yeah, yum. Oh. Yeah. Anyway. What are we doing?

We're getting hungry is what we're doing. We're getting hungry, man. What, where's Skye? Yeah, Gippsland. What's the hotel, what's the pub? Yeah, what's the pub? No, I think there is a, I think it's Gippsland Sky, isn't it? Near, near, near um, any officer, that kind of place. Yeah.

For the listeners who don't know Dave's work, he's got a... I've been called Mr. Malways on No Barrier Fan. His secret skill is knowing every town and suburbs high school and nightclub. And also what school people went to is another one of my knowledge. You went to Scion. Did you go to Scion? No. Oh that would have been very impressive. Did you go to a Catholic school?

I did go to a Catholic school. It's a pretty small one in Mount Waverley. Oh, hang out with girls from there. It was called Mount... Yeah it's a it's a strange name. Avila. Yeah Avila. I hang out with Avila girls. Tiffany and Paula. Oh yeah. Remember them? Charmian. Charmian. Charmian. Oh they're a bit older than you. Matt you went to somewhere in Moorabbin. Yeah that's right. somewhere in Moorabbin? Yeah, that's right. Moorabbin High, what was it called? No, I want to go to the Catholic one as well. It was called St. James, but it's um... Sir and I don't know.

So you're from Sydney originally, aren't you? No, I'm from here, but I love that your skill is sort of knowing... Schools, but I'm not very good at it. A school that's near where they went. Yeah, not really a school. Right kind of area. Sir Rowan did live in Sydney for 10 years. Yeah, I did live there.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What school did you go to here? Caulfield, Grandma. Oh. You and Nick Cave. Dave O'Neill. Yeah, that's right. And some of the great footballers.

Yeah, a lot of athletes with the quarterfinal, Grandma. Chris Judd. Chris Judd, that's right. Juddy. Dave O'Neill's got real beef with grammar types, so... Yeah, you'll be careful. You posted an old clip recently about just tearing in a grammar student. So that's why, actually, that's why I sat you two together.

Oh, it's not because Josh and I are the sportsmen. I get asked to do gigs at the grammar schools and they never want to pay you. Oh, we've got no money. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah. It's for the rowing shed did you row yeah no but if I had to go watch them row you don't look like a rower you're not you know I would have been a coxswain yeah yeah like a stroke and yeah so scars just is part of Frank's symbol looks a bit oh that's that that way that's right yeah you're right all right we're back.

Oh, hang on. I haven't fucking... Jesus. That was good. That was really fun. Sorry to ask. Man, I talked to you all day about Full Frontal in the 90s.

Oh yeah, I can talk more about it. That's so cool. That was a great job. I didn't know you wrote a lot of Poiter stuff. I did all the- I loved the Poiter stuff. Around the schoolyard. Poiter?

Yeah, Poiter was- Yeah, Poynter was- Yeah, P Around the school yard. Poiter. It was primary school land high school. Banner, even though he's from Gladstone Park and went to Essendon Grammar, he still, me and him were kind of similar. We were out of suburbs guys. And like cars, I wasn't really into cars. Well I had a hotted up car. But um, so we got on well because he didn't like some of the riders were a bit you know, bit Melbourne Uni even though I went to Melbourne Uni but whatever I got a well worth banner because he was a stand-up too yeah I think a lot of people forget that I forget that sometimes he was a great stand-up he was on he was on an episode of WTF the Mark Marron podcast and he

was started talking about the Melbourne scene yeah in the 90s which is pretty fun yeah yeah yeah yeah and then takes himself very serious I see him about once a year now he takes help he's a serious actor wait hang on the famous story is when he was often Chopper I said don't do it and that's the movie that broke him and he showed me photos of him dressed up as Chopper and goes I knew I didn't know him but I knew the books and I'm like oh that guy I've read one of his books fuck why would you do that it's just weird anyway had we hurt that he didn't take your advice no probably good that he did you know yeah he's the Hulk now or or he was. He was the Hulk.

I think the shock jocks in Canada say, what do you think about Beaver? What do you mean Beaver? Did you ever appear on Full Frontal Day? Yeah, yeah, so what they wrote a series of sketches called The Fat Loser and I'd wear a striped top and because the other there was one large guy in it Ross Williams Russell he was an actor shakes. He didn't want to be He was the yeah, he was like the he would always play the big guy balding kind of big guy And so I would so the first sketch which was with Kitty Flanagan was in it with me She was she was in full front of it. Maybe a year and a two years Maybe and she was a receptionist in a gym and I walk in I go I'm here for

my assessment and she goes you're a fat loser and that's the sketch and so then the head writer Doug just like he loved me and he goes oh we're gonna write a whole see I had a song and everything we finished a show one day with the fat loser song he's a fat fat loser so we just keep getting that on sketch shows they try to grab on to anything that's slightly successful yes so I feel all these sketches and I go oh this one's good that's one great and they showed in front of a live audience and that really sorts the weight from the chance yeah to speak and so it that first fat loser sketch went off because it was quick and funny and then we just did all these

other ones where I was called a fat loser in my same striped top. Yeah, you're right, they love to really drive it into the ground. Yeah, so once they saw Poiter was working for example, they just went let's do a Poiter sketch every week. Poiter, Fabio. Oh my god, Fabio killed me. Oh yeah, that was Sean. I used to write with Sean. You ended up on the radio with him as well. Yeah and also I worked on the McAliff program Yeah, that was that that was much cooler Yeah, when you go to a party and they say and you say I'm working on the McAliff program

Yeah, and I did warm-up on that show too. He wanted me to do warm-up because he'd want a normal warm-up man So I said a warm-up, but yeah, I appeared in that a few times He did a sketch where he was a dentist and he said we haven't got any laughing gas but we've got comedian David and I would go in and tell jokes some of those jokes I still do are bloody they're all my fat jokes yeah so yeah yeah he was he was good to work with Sean but he would just say David I need um short sketches short skits just write short sketches and So you just write short skits for him. I worked on everything. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Well, especially in that era when there was a lot of sketch shows

Yeah If you can't if you can do it and you're easy to work with that's a lot of people Doug McLeod is now passed away, but he was the head writer and he used to say him and I think about back in those Andrew Knight was the big boss so he's the guy wrote sea change and rake and Yeah, that Russell Crowe movie and he what's this? He's got a show at the moment It's on ABC on Sunday nights at Bob Franklin's in Bay of Fires. Oh, yeah, so he's one of the rise Anyway, he's a but he you would go to sketch meetings and and you pitch your ideas to him and he just go nah

Right, so you got a guy walks through a gym and he'd just go, nah. Right. So you go, a guy walks into the gym, says he's a fat loser, he goes, yeah, I like that. Then you go, your next one goes, nah. So there was none of this, I remember going to writers meetings in the 2000s where like the runner would suggest an idea and people would spend half an hour entertaining the thought and I was just like, this will not happen in the 90s. Right. There was a hierarchy and the boss just went no. Yes or no.

Interesting. Yeah I love it. Yeah it was good. Good days. But you know it was sort of competitive too though. But fun. Yeah fun. But you know when they did that 30 Rock show and they had the writers room with the one woman. There was always one woman. There were the intellectual guys that went to Harvard. Then there were the stand-ups. It was very similar to Full Frontal. There was always one woman, there was always one woman. There were the intellectual guys that went to Harvard. Then there were the stand-ups. It was very similar to Full Frontal. There was always one woman, and there was always the uni guys

and then the stand-up guys. Yeah, yeah. So it was very spot on in their portrayal. They nailed 90s. Yeah, they did, 90s sketch shows. Even though we were in a different country, but it was the same. There's so many people going on from that show yeah

As the director who's like Dana Reid Dana Reid was an actress and then she did writing as well And she did she's I remember her saying to me. I'm gonna do directing I'm gonna do a thing an internship on blue heelers. I'm like. Oh, yeah, whatever I'll go on your day and now she directs and might sell yeah Oh, wow, she's directed all sorts of books She did the birth scene where the um Peggy from Mad Men gave birth It's an incredible show Wow

Incredible Yeah she's done really well Sean McCullough of course Eric Banner But also in the writer's room there was Matt Cameron who now is a big time drama writer He just wrote that series on Stan Prosper about Oh yep About the um What do you know? Hillsong kind of Yeah it's got the right guy in it Yeah yeah he he wrote that series on Stan Prosper about about the what do you know song yeah

got the right guy in it yeah yeah he he wrote that and Gary McCaffrey who wrote all the stuff with Sean yeah like everyone came out of that yeah yeah yeah and me Marco tool who went on to write all the black comedy stuff and work on John Safran show stuff like that and yeah that's oh yeah it was good amazing so good I forget that you wrote you wrote Take Away yeah yeah that's and you and your stupid mate yeah getting two features bloody hell and they're uh there was a lot of orously difficult anywhere but in are there was a lot of or see difficult anywhere, but in Australia There was a big what happened was the castle came out which they funded themselves basically that was a massive success

So Macquarie Bank funded all these Aussie comedies like Crackerjack Tony Martin's bad eggs you can't stop you can't stop the murders which those Sydney guys back Marlon Gary and those guys and yeah, then take away You just you've been might there was a heap of them came out none of them as successful as Cracker Jack did really Well boy did really well that the moves I was involved didn't do that well, but that was good fun It was a golden age. Yeah Rose Byrne was in takeaway. I gave her a lift home once

Aircons nice, huh? Yeah, that's a newish addition Newest tradition Dave's that's taken top of the line. The taken are good. Yeah They're so funny. I've done air con gigs. They take it so fucking seriously yeah do you like air con Dave yeah yeah you like it doesn't like air con mate I love it you know I'm old enough to remember we didn't have air con as kids oh that's right my we all remember that and now it's much better isn't it if it wasn't for you here today Jess it'd be a real sausage fest. Happy to help. Happy to do my part. What is this a full frontal writers' room? Yeah exactly, the one girl. It's 1993 again.