WHOA That's Good Podcast - Overcoming Your Eating Disorder & Fighting Through Anxiety | Sadie Robertson Huff & Alexa PenaVega
Episode Date: June 15, 2022Alexa PenaVega is so full of raw honesty, encouragement, and wisdom. The “Spy Kids” star, Broadway performer, and “Dancing with the Stars” contestant joins Sadie to open up about her struggles... with an eating disorder and how she broke free and conquered the thoughts and fears that led her down that path. They discuss the ways social media can make everything harder and the pivotal advice Alexa gave Sadie about raising her daughter and living life as a Christian family in the public eye. And Sadie shares a spiritual moment she discovered in a “Wonder Woman” scene. “What If Love Is the Point?: Living for Jesus in a Self-Consumed World” by Alexa and Carlos PenaVega is available for pre-order and will be released on June 28, 2022. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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What's up? Well, that's good fam. Y'all, I am so excited for this Wednesday because
I have one of my good friends on the show today. It is Alexa, Pinna Vega, and y'all, y'all, y'all might know who she is, but y'all about
to love her even more because she's so much more than what she's known for.
She is filled with so much joy, so much love, and more than that, just a fruit of who
God is.
And I'm grateful to have a conversation with her.
Her and Carlos actually have a new book coming out called, What If Love Is The Point Living for Jesus
in a Self-Consumed World?
Don't we need it?
Bring it on.
I like some.
I'm so excited to have you on the pie guest.
Baby, thank you for having one half of the book here.
Yes, thank you.
That's great.
That's great.
I'm sure you'll cover all the grounds.
I'm gonna do my best.
I will try to answer some Carlos questions too,
if possible.
That's awesome.
Hey, we'll just have a conversation and look,
if people wanna hear Carlos's side,
they can read the book, right?
And the book.
That's right.
The book is amazing.
Like I was telling you before we popped on,
like one of my friends just got finished reading it
and she had notes and notes and just was so encouraged
and inspired and was like
Sadie this conversation I'm so excited about which was just cool so look I
I heard before we started this that you haven't been prepped at all for the woe that's good pie
kez question so for all for all the listeners who know what's coming I'm putting you in the hot
seat to ask you the first question I ask everyone, what is the best piece of advice
you've ever been given?
Boom.
Oh, best piece of advice I've ever been given.
It's actually funny, and I've been hearing it more so now
than before, but somebody told me to not be afraid
to slow down, and this was years ago, years and years ago,
like, you know, like, I think earlier on in my career,
it must have been like 12 or 13, during like, spy kids,
and it was crazy.
And they actually gave the advice to my mom, not to me,
but obviously I took that for me to not be afraid to slow down.
And that's actually stuck with me,
especially in a time where everything is like, hustle, hustle, hustle, hurry, hurry, hurry, the culture
that we live in really caters towards like give up your life and and like work
hard every day because that's what it's about when really I feel like you know
the miracles of Jesus happened in the time when he was interrupted and when he
was like slowing down.
He wasn't like, hey, I have to hurry up and get to this next play.
So everybody leave me a while.
Like, it was in the interruption where so many beautiful miracles happen for him.
So for me, that like not being afraid to slow down, even in our busy, busy season,
sometimes it's literally just taking like five minutes before a podcast, five minutes before to set just going like all right
God reset me. I know it's a busy busy time. I want to slow down and just sit with
you even if it's only the two minutes that I have for today to sit with you. So
I guess don't be afraid to slow down. It's so good. I love that. Why don't you show up on the spot and drop some truth
that you heard when you were 12?
That's so good.
Okay, so for many people listening,
they saw you and they knew who you were.
But for some people, they're like,
wait, spike it.
This is my whole childhood.
Like, this is who we're talking to
and how cool that not only were you on spike it,
but here you are years later
and you're speaking truth into people's life. And I just I love that that you've grown up
with so many of us. My age and around our age and I just think that that is
awesome. There is a part in the book that you talk about what you remember from
your spikeits audition. And I just love this because I think that so often we
idolize celebrities, but celebrities are so human.
And your thoughts in that moment
were like so your age and I just love it.
So talk to me about that time of your life,
what you're going for and the memory
that really stood out to you.
Yes, okay, so when I audition for Spike is,
I walked into the room.
And now please know that usually when you're walking
into an audition room, it's full of a bunch of old people, especially if you're a kid
Anybody older than 40 is an old person, okay? So I'm a level and a lot of you
In the audition room and there's this director holding a guitar with like a cool bandana on and I remember just looking at him being like
You look really cool. You don't look like a director at all
You look really cool. You don't look like a director at all
He thought really funny instead of an insult
Yeah, that was like that was what I remembered most was that he was like such a cool dude and then
I was like when you go and you work on sets like that I mean it was playing dress up every day. It was a very unique special experience that I don't know. I feel like sets are so different
now because of like social media and expectations with kids and no one I was little. We didn't have
cell phones like we didn't have social media. Whenever we were on set we weren't on our phones
between takes. We were playing together, we were playing football. they hired a fun coordinator on set.
So we were just like, it was amazing.
Oh my gosh, if I did not do what I'm, you know how people always say, like, if you didn't do it, you do what would you do?
I would be a fun coordinator.
That sounds like the job.
I was a job.
Can you imagine like, yes, I'm a fun leader for a living with that.
So I'm like, that's incredible I'm talking about. That's incredible.
Okay, so I love it.
So you're so human in this moment,
and as you are now,
and then you get this role that obviously kind of changes
probably the trajectory of your life.
That's a huge role.
And you continue to do acting in such sense.
But besides what people obviously saw from your childhood,
what was your childhood life?
Like, didn't you grow up on a farm?
You had this supermodel model, Mom?
Like, tell us a little bit about the backstory.
Okay, so the backstory of where I came from,
my mom was a supermodel, but she watched other families
and she didn't like that these parents would leave their kids.
So she actually traveled everywhere with her children.
So we would be at these big photo shoots with her as little, little kids. So she actually traveled everywhere with her children. So we would be at these big photo shoots with her as little little kids. And she went on a photo
shoot in California and her closest friend, which is my godmother, was watching me
at the time and took me to an audition while we were in LA. And I ended up getting
the job, which is a very rare, rare thing. I mean kind of how it all came about
was just very wild. But honestly, like God had his hand in it from day one,
and you can just how everything unfolded
from opportunity to opportunity.
It was really such a God thing.
But yeah, we were living on a ranch at the time in Florida,
and I would feed the horses, that was my job.
So they would literally leave the four-wheeler in second gear.
There was like horse feet on the back
of the big four-wheeler.
And I drive around the ranch feeding horses.
Awesome.
It's so awesome.
And yeah, I know that's the thing.
People see the Hollywood, but they
don't see the girl and the ranch in Florida
with the second gear for it.
I know, right?
I just love how. I just love how.
I just, I love that.
I love that, you know, our life can look like so many different things,
there's so many different seasons of it, and it doesn't matter if you're in Florida
and the rancher, if you're in Hollywood, it's the same person through and through.
And I think that's just like a good thing to recognize in life.
Um, I feel like we had about this before like with with social media and like for
us, you know, one of my favorite verses is I'll run, interace, all runners run, but only
one gets the prize, run in such a way as to get the prize. And for me, that means like
walk the walk, like the prize is the kingdom, you really have to walk the walk. So when
we look at social media today, like our goal is to really show what walking the walk looks like.
Like you don't have to mention Jesus,
you just have to show what living for Jesus actually looks like.
And more often than not,
like that represents him more than like screaming Jesus
to the top of your lungs.
That's right, that's so good.
It's so clear that you brought that out
because I was just about to say that.
That's literally where I was going was,
you know, a lot of people don't know that we have become friends and part of that's from us
both been on dance with the stars, us both having the same partner, which I want to talk about in a
second. But one cool thing was I watched you and Carlos do such a good job with parenting your
kids in such a way that you were, you know, showing them on social media and inviting them into your life,
traveling with them, just showing how,
I guess you can be a parent
and doesn't have to completely change your whole entire life
and whatnot.
And when Christian and I became a family,
I was getting a little bit nervous
because everyone's like,
well, how are you gonna do what you do now?
Are you still gonna travel?
Oh, you know, are you gonna show honey?
Are you not?
Somebody's celebrities keep their kids private.
And I was like, who do I ask these questions to?
Like, you know, who's done this?
And I thought about you.
And I texted you and I was like, look, I'm nervous.
I mean, to be honest, I texted you
because I was really afraid.
One, I was nervous about just the change.
And then two, I was really just nervous
because I was kind of afraid the change. And then two, I was really just nervous because I was,
I was kind of afraid to like show honey to the world
because you know, this is just like your perfect little gift
and you know how the world can be,
the world can be evil, the world can be mean,
the world can be hateful, and the world can just be scary.
And I was like, how do you,
how did you get to the point where you decided
to share your family and your advice to me was like,
so pivotal and you were like, and you can share a little bit about this to the point where you decided to share your family and your advice to me was like so
pivotal and you were like and you can share a little bit about this because I'm sure this
leads into everything you do, but you were like look
We are to set the example of what a loving Christian family looks like and if they're not gonna show that on all the other
Media platforms like you have the opportunity to do that on your media platform And I was like like, wow, like that's so true. If TV's not gonna show that example,
and I'm frustrated about that,
if movies aren't gonna show that example,
and I'm frustrated about that.
But yet here, I have a platform
with millions of people that are following me
where I can show what a loving family looks like,
who love God, love each other, love their kids,
and their life doesn't become this sad story
when they have kids.
It actually starts as an amazing journey.
Like how cool to set that tone.
And honestly, from you saying that,
I walked in it with peace.
I didn't walk in it with fear.
Like I share honey with the world and our little family.
And I have seen, it was so cool.
I had this moment.
And I was at the B-Jerk's navigation.
And this girl walks up to me, she had just had a baby.
She was like, you have inspired me so much in motherhood,
how to like be a Christian mom and like love my husband better.
And she gave me this like,
just the most incredible affirmation.
And I literally thought about what you said.
And I'm like, how'd you not spoken that over my life?
I don't know that I would have done it.
And now look at the people who have been impacted
by the words that you said.
And so I'm just so thankful for that.
And so tell it to me a little bit about that.
Like you and Carlos is like specific call
that y'all feel as y'all are in Hollywood
and doing the whole celebrity thing
but also fully deval cushions.
You know, I think, well, one, thank you
for that encouragement because hearing like the
seeds of just, you give me giving you my opinion on something is awesome because that's very
encouraging for me.
I think for us, it's like you said, if we're not going to see these examples on television
shows or in movies, where are we going to learn it?
Because right now, there's something set up to really glorify a beautiful family.
I mean, a lot of that's getting stripped away
very, very quickly in every area,
whether it's in the media,
whether it's on movies or TV.
It's just the idea of family is really broken.
And there is, it's interesting
because I get a lot of people who are not Christian,
writing me, and just being like, man, I don't know why, but I really like your family. And I don't,
I don't believe the God that, that you guys believe in, but it's very interesting the way that you
talk about your faith. So like, I'm just, I'm very curious. And it's funny to get those messages,
because obviously we know that that it, that it's his light, right?
Like, his light coming through and what we do is what's actually causing these people to
come back and go, wait, why do I like this family?
Well, because of Jesus.
I don't think it's because of Jesus, but that's why.
And I think we don't realize how many times we're actually planting seeds daily, whether it's
whether you are somebody who has a platform or if you're somebody who's just grocery shopping,
like how you treat people, how you treat your kids in public, how you love on them or like
listen to them at the grocery store, like I know it's easy when you have like friends, I take all
three of my kids to grocery shop and it can be insane.
Like absolutely insane.
But we figured out we make it work.
And it's actually really fun because I've found other people going,
oh my gosh, there's a mom all by herself with three kids in the store.
And it could be chaotic, but it isn't.
It's actually like a very peaceful situation.
And I've found that like even that in
itself has been encouraging for other people. So I don't know. I think all of this
is to say is like we have an important job as Christian families to step out and
walk like Jesus did and like really lead my example without even having to say
anything.
Must be great. That's so good. I love that. I was gonna talk to you about dancing with the stars
because one thing that you and Carlos did was y'all actually competed against each other
which honestly you have not yet how you did that because it's already hard as it is.
But I want to ask you about that just outside of dance with the stars.
I feel like that's a picture of what could be life because y'all both, you know, are in
the television world.
You're both doing big careers and all that stuff.
And there's this like, um, temptation and relationship to compete against one another
and not champion one another.
And so what's that journey kind of been like for you and Carlos to learn like, okay, we are not into this competition,
we are each other's cheerleaders.
Okay, so I will say this,
I did not know my husband was competitive
until dancing with the stars.
A prior fact, he was not competitive.
But then after that, like we really,
we, if we could work on every project
together, we would. That is our dream goal, like to create a show or something where we
can just work together again and again, because we make a great team. We're a great, we're
like a great married couple, we're great parents, we're great partners when it comes to
working together. Like God, God built us in an awesome way.
As far as work goes, we've never been competitive
in that way at all.
I love seeing him shine.
I am his biggest cheerleader.
And I know he's my biggest cheerleader.
I mean, there's so many times where I definitely
become fearful or I get embarrassed or too shy
and he's like, babe, do you know who you are?
Come on.
I feel like the dog was like,
I can't, he's so encouraging, you know?
But I will say, during dancing with the stars,
he was very competitive.
Hey, it'll bring it out of you.
What you don't know is there.
Well, come on.
I was like, what the heck?
He didn't want, it wasn't about like he wanted me
out of the competition.
He just wanted to do better than I did.
And that's hilarious.
That would be me and Christian would not be good for that.
We would not be good for it.
And so it starts together.
All your dancing real quick.
Those are adorable.
Stop.
Oh my gosh.
Listen, I don't care if Christian does not have like, I don't know what you would call it,
like rhythm at all, but he would be so competitive no matter what we were doing.
Like, he cannot clap to the beat of any song,
but that boy would compete if he was on Dizz with the Stars.
So, for him, they'd love that kind of heart,
you know they would.
They do, they would.
Well, I love how we've talked about like so many of the wins,
like, you know, spy kids and Dizz with the Stars
and you and Carlos have been such a great couple, but what I love about your book is you talk about the
hard stuff and that is something that Hollywood does not always show the hard
side of things they always show the good side of things and the filtered side
of things and that's not Hollywood social media that's the world that's just
the temptation of wanting to show people the perspective that you want them to
see but the reality is there's a lot more to your story.
You know, you talk very openly about eating disorders,
which I walk through myself as I know so many women have.
You talk about your divorce.
You talk about these hard moments,
and I'm just so thankful you didn't shy away
from those things because those are the things
that so many people can relate to.
And I think it makes
the aspect of faith in your life and all the blessing in your life. That much more
hopeful for people who are listening because they're not like, they're like, oh, I don't have to have a perfect life to have that Jesus she's talking about. Actually, you can go through the hardship
and go through the struggle and that's where he is. So, talk to me about some of that part of your
testimony. Like when you're walking through the eating disorder,
what do that look like and how did God bring you out
of that time of your life?
Because one of the number one things we get asked
and our DMs and stuff is about eating disorders
because our audience is primarily like 18 to 25 year olds.
A lot of girls going through college
and I know that's a time where a lot of people
struggle the most with those types of things.
Oh yeah.
So for me, my biggest fear was that anybody would find out that I had an eating disorder.
Because in my head, I'm like, I'm still me.
I still have my personality.
I still have my heart.
But I was living with this secret that I was really, really ashamed of. And I learned it from, you know, I was being praised whenever I looked skinnier.
And if I didn't look at skinny one day, nobody would compliment me or nobody would talk
about how beautiful I was with anything like that.
So I like, I really started thriving on what other people thought of me instead of focusing
and on God.
But I was also
in a very different season in my life where I wanted a relationship with God, but I didn't really have,
I definitely didn't have what I have now. But the biggest lie that I learned at the time was that
if people found out it would be the end of me. And I think that was the stronghold that the eating
disorder had over me. So if anybody listening right now has an eating disorder, please tell someone, even if it's
one person tell a sibling, tell a friend, if you don't want to know any of these people,
you can find someone online that like nobody has to know about that you can like talk
to there because that's the stronghold was that if anybody found out about my eating disorder, I was done.
But the second I started talking about it and telling people, I was like breaking off
all those chains and then it just became this thing that no longer consumed me.
Like obviously, God did a whole number in my life to get me through the eating disorder,
but the big thing for me was even when I got through it
I was still so afraid to talk about it because I didn't want people to look at me and go, oh she had an eating disorder.
Exactly. I talk about that in the book. I have like an interesting family dynamic and we've all gone through.
A really hard time as a family but we've also been doing a lot of healing
and we're definitely on the up, which is fantastic.
But there was a time when I was younger
and my mom said it out of,
truly, she meant it to protect me,
but it did hurt me at the time.
Do you remember Catherine McFee
when she came out,
saying that she was Baleemic?
And it was like on the cover of like all these magazines
at the time, and it was something simple,
but like my mom just said to me,
you know, now people are only gonna see her
as being a Belie Mc.
So like don't ever let anybody know
that like you're dealing with this.
And she, I know like she meant it in like a way
of protecting me, but I really feel like the
enemy took those words and just turned it into something that had a stronghold over my life.
So like I just lived with a secret and it just tormented me for so long. And I also probably
could have solved this much faster had I confided in the right people earlier on.
Well, absolutely. Community is definitely everything for those things in the right people earlier on. Well, absolutely.
Community is definitely everything for those things in the
enemy.
We'll use any words, any person to think like to say something, like you say, like she
could have not been meaning that way at all.
It could have been for protection, but the enemy can twist and distort and manipulate, can
make you feel like, oh, well, then I can't tell anybody because
if I told anybody then dot, dot, dot.
And I love how you include in the book that I think I like 14 year-old vanity fairs like
hottest teen, one of the hottest teen or the 14 hottest teens, whatever it was, which
is honestly, first of all, so cool, just a small flex moment.
But what you said about it was even cooler was that, you know,
You would think that that would bring you self-esteem and you would think that would bring confidence
Been in fact, it's in the opposite and I actually experienced the same thing in a different way because when I was struggling the most with my
Weight and just distorted eating and distorted mindset when it came to food
I was like modeling literally in New York fashion week.
And when I looked back at that people were like,
well, how could you think that you were dot, dot, dot,
because you were in fashion week?
But I was like, that actually made it worse.
Not that it wasn't the people's fault for that.
It was just where my view was, where my perspective was.
And just like you said, like even by people saying,
like you look skinny or even by people,
it was just feeding the insecurity that I had
and it was actually making me almost strive
for perfection even more,
that was absolutely impossible to obtain
because it was a false image I had in my head.
And at the time, my image of myself was so distorted.
The way I viewed myself was so different.
Now that I look back at pictures and see myself
I'm like what in the world it was like the enemy like distorted my vision even and so I think a lot of girls think
If I was voted the hottest girl in Vennet if I was walking near fashion week
Then I would know that I was beautiful. Then I would never struggle with eating disorder
Talk to me a little bit about how that's not where truth and confidence is found.
Well, I think it's hard, really, really hard, especially for girls nowadays, because,
I mean, look at every photo that we post, we're like, how many people liked it?
Like, I hope like, yeah.
Like, I know even, you know, my younger siblings, they're on the oldest of seven.
And there's like seven of us. Well, I have a half-sister who's older than I am, but they're seven of us.
And I can see my younger siblings who are in a very different generation. One is 13,
one is 16, the other one's like 21, and they get really sad when they don't get a lot of
likes on a photo. And I forget that like, we've come through it, we're older now,
so we're like, it doesn't matter, but for them it really matters. And I have to put myself,
because they're in a very different situation than how I grew up, I had enough insecurities that
were very frustrating to deal with. This new generation, it's a very, it's a hard mental thing for
young kids to deal with, because it is a form of rejection.
And I think that's where you really have to lean on God's word.
And honestly, that's what got me through my eating disorder.
I had this fate, my whole entire life, like my mom planted that seed when I was a kid.
But we stopped going to church when I was 13, but I craved that relationship with God.
And I knew it was deeper than what I had.
And I wanted to know more.
So when I turned 16, I started going to church on my own and really kind of going like, God, who are you?
And I would talk about God, I'd talk about Jesus, but then Holy Spirit was this weird thing that I
didn't quite understand. So I just didn't even talk about Holy Spirit. That was kind of like
pushed a thought. It was kind of like right to you. You're like, I don't understand that.
I pushed a thought. I was kind of like, right.
You do.
Yeah.
You're like, I understand that.
Okay, that's weird, right?
But then as you get older and like,
as I started really reading the word
and understanding who God was
and developing that relationship with him,
I started figuring out like what the armor of God
really stood for.
So like, it's also not your shield of faith,
belt of truth, you know, belt of truth, you know,
at all the armor, but what I was missing was my sword, which is the word of God. So I
had all this faith to like battle my eating disorder, but I didn't have a sword to kill it
because I wasn't in the word the way when I was younger, the way I was when I was older.
So for me, like any advice for
people regardless of like eating disorder or frustration on like confidence or the way you look,
the word of God is power. Like it is so powerful. I mean it's so powerful in the way that, you know,
like people look at like superheroes or magic or whatever they want to look at.
It is literally that. I feel like a superhero because I know I have God behind me and everything that I do. I kind of feel untouchable. I know I'm not, not me. It's not by my own doing.
Yeah. But, but he's in control. So I literally have nothing to do there because he's in control.
It's like a wild, beautiful revelation.
When you discover that it's freedom.
I love that.
And I love how there's this moment where
like the Holy Spirit, it's not weird.
He's your friend.
Like he is like, how Jesus said,
there is something coming.
There is someone coming who's greater
because he's gonna walk with you.
He's gonna be in you.
And so man, when you accept that, then life just,
it does feel untouchable.
There's this moment, I love how you compare it to Super Here.
There's this moment in the movie Wonder Woman
that I was like, yes, a name in, I was like, that is it.
It's, she's actually, it's right before she has like
her full Wonder Woman costume on,
and she's about to just go for it.
And they're about to cross this like,
super dangerous part of like the war.
Basically, everybody else is saying,
no, we have to go around it.
We're not gonna help these people.
This is too far gone.
This is too bad.
And then the guy goes,
this is not what we're here to do.
And Wonder Woman looks at him and he goes,
she goes, but it's what I'm gonna do and in that moment
right she said she's gonna I'm gonna she like reveals her like suit and this whole stuff and she has
a shield and she has a sword come on show to fade sword of the spirit and there's like all these like
arrows and bullets coming at her and she's defending all of them with her shield and then she has her sword that has the power
And I'm like this is literally the picture of
What it looks like to walk with the armor of God?
It's like you can get to go to the places that
Seemed dangerous and that seemed like they're gonna take you out and that seem like there's no way that you can go through
That no one else wants to go to and you say I actually actually can walk in this space because I want to have the show to fade that's going
to defend me from the arrows and the things that the enemies throwing at me.
But to have the sort of the spirit that can actually take out anything that's coming at
me and the name of Jesus.
And like when I saw the unlike man, I want to bring that same energy into the things that
the enemies trying to take me out with whether it be eating
a sort of whether it be anxiety attacks whether it be depression or anger whatever the thing is you
struggle with and so I just when you were saying all that I was like yes God gave me the same image
and it's what guy you gave Paul and Ephesians 6 when he wrote what the armor of God was and gosh
it's just so good I like love it. I love that.
I have to watch that movie now.
Go watch it again.
Everyone go watch it again with the perspective
of the gospel.
I mean, even there's a part at the end
where she, like the last thing she says,
and it is so spiritual.
And I wrote it down and we actually had it in our office,
like the quote for a while,
because it was like so truth-filled.
It was crazy.
It was crazy.
You gotta go watch it with the biblical perspective.
I'm gonna watch it.
I'm gonna watch it.
I was such a dork after it.
I literally like watched the movie,
was so moved, I like read the script online.
I'm not even an actor,
so I was in there reading the script.
Do you think the writers were questions?
I think you look like Donald.
I looked it up.
Look, I looked it up.
I didn't find anything on that, but I was convinced
that they were because it was so spiritual.
Like, at the end, she talks about how there will always
be light and there's dark, and nobody can really save you
from that.
At the end of the day, it's a choice.
What are you going to believe?
And then it says,
uh,
but we don't, we don't give up on the light of the dark.
We stay and we fight for the world that we know it can be.
Like, I mean, there is so many lines
that were just like drop them like moments.
She talks about love.
She talks about true light darkness.
I was like, this is like the Bible.
That comes from the pretty Christian to me though.
I mean, that sounds pretty Christian to me.
Hey, well, if they took any inspiration from the Bible,
it's just really cool to know that it created an incredible movie based off of the idea of what God created.
Well, the whole thing, and I've been thinking about this lately, this is totally going off topic, but it's just so interesting that like so many movies that are like the number one movies,
it's like adventure movies, they're super hero movies and it's all about good versus evil,
it's light versus darkness, it's all this stuff and really that's the idea of the Bible too,
it's like since the beginning God created light and he separated the light and the dark right and then
You know towards the end of like revelation there's so much darkness
But then like God is the light of the world and then in the middle of the Bible
There's like this moment where God tells us what our job is to be and it's to be the light in the midst of the darkness
So there's always a separation of good and evil is always a separation of light and darkness and you're called to be the light. And so when you're watching
these superhero movies and you're so captivated by the story and you always went light to
one, you always want the good guy to win. It's like, well, this is like the whole setup
of how God, God moves. God already instilled that in our hearts. Like God instilled that in our hearts. Like before we were born, you know?
So it's funny how we now come out like that.
We want to watch movies like that.
We want to see redemption stories.
We want we want all this stuff because God instilled that in us.
And it's so funny to me when when when people are like seeking
all of these higher powers and things. And I'm like, you're naturally seeking God.
Like, that's what you want.
I know it's hard for people to want to give themselves over
to God, but it does kind of make me go like,
oh, when people are searching for higher powers,
but they keep avoiding God, I'm like, what are you doing?
Yeah.
Because he's creating more fire in your heart?
So true.
I read a quote in your book that was almost identical
to what you just said.
And I thought it was so good that we've been created
with this natural, just desire and longing for God.
You know?
And when you come to the revelation, like you said,
of, wow, that God is for me, not against me.
That God is with me, not against me. That God is with
me and ready and available. The moment I turn to him, like your whole life changes.
One thing that was a theme in your old book is that yes, y'all are pursuing the Lord,
but God is like pursuing y'all. And that's for all of us. That we pursue the Lord pursues
us. And there is a moment where you talk about
Giving someone like $800 and the story turns out so cool
And I wanted to you to talk about that because so many people have such a hard time believing God because they can't see him
But it's almost like it's not that you can physically see God or you can audibly hear God
But the things that God does you can't miss and the things that he says when he speaks in conviction,
you cannot, you can't not hear.
And so, talking about that moment,
and just some moments where it's like,
this God here you can't see is someone
that you also can't miss.
Well, I feel like that really comes down
to like, holy spirit living inside you.
And that was something that I just couldn't understand
early on on but like
God was always using Holy Spirit to guide me and to like push me to do things that I couldn't quite understand
That it was really God's guidance right in this particular moment that you're talking about I've never I've never had
I've never worried about money. I've never cared about money.
It's not something, it's not because I grew up super wealthy.
Actually, there were times that, and I didn't even
talk about this in the book, but there
were times when we were living in our car
because we had an interesting family situation.
And there were times where we had cars and houses repossessed.
Like crazy stuff happened in our lives.
And maybe that'll be a story for future
book. But I've never cared about money because I knew that God was always going to provide
as long as I've walked in a way that honored him and honored his children.
So for me, I've really lived by faith in that way. Obviously, you want to exercise wisdom as
well. You don't want to live carelessly.
Oh, God's going to honor me, so I'm just going to do whatever.
But really listening to him and I knew this woman needed the $800, and she needed it
more than I did.
And I just knew, God has me covered.
I don't have to worry.
So I wrote her a check and I literally had $5 left in my account because I only had $805.
And yeah, and then the next week I ended up booking a huge film that like more than covered
my family and we were very honored in that moment.
But it was just such a beautiful testimony because at the time Carlos was not that guy.
He was a guy who, any money he had, any belonging he had, those were his things.
He earned them and he was not giving them up. Not to say that Carlos would never give, but he didn't understand that kind of giving.
Like, Christian, giving, like, Christian,
like, where this all belongs to God anyways, right?
Right.
Right.
Right.
And it was really cool to be able to, like, give this lady this check and then
him witness a week later, the abundant blessing.
Like, you don't do it for the blessing, but he was like, holy,
can only God, like more than honored what you just did.
So, so that was cool because he was still a baby in his faith at that time because he was
very early on in relation to death.
That's so cool.
I mean, it's so cool.
It's not that you expect the gift because God's giving you enough that if he doesn't give
it back financially or if he doesn't give it back in a job or position then
then he's done enough but there are those moments where where he does do that and
just the kindness of him to come down in those intentional ways and and it be a
dollar sign or it be a a friend that comes into your life or be a relationship
it's like the coolest thing and I had a mentor once say I don't know if you know
Shelley Giggly very well but she's incredible and she said, I dare you to try to out give God. And I was like, okay. And it was
so crazy. It was so crazy. Like, I was like, okay. And like, there were these, right after
that, a few moments where I felt like so strong in the Lord, so like, give this person this
amount of money and
It's hard. It's easier whenever you're single to do that because you're like, okay, you know But when you're married, it's like hard because then it's like you both have to be on the same page as that and it's y'all
It's not even I sure remember going to Christian and being like I just really feel like the Lord has told me to do this
And I want you to pray about it because I want it to be a us thing.
And he was like absolutely 100% let's do it.
So we did and literally I'm not kidding.
We set on that for a couple of months
because we felt like we needed to do it in person
and we didn't live in the same place.
So finally we get to the place she is.
We give her the money and 20 minutes later.
I got the text and it was like the most random thing ever.
And basically it was a deal that I was gonna be able to make.
That was like that and more.
And it was like the craziest thing ever
because it literally, we said, we knew God said do it.
We knew we were gonna do it in person. And the minute we gave it to a 20 minutes later is like that and like I
said yeah that doesn't always happen there's been other times where we've given
and nothing and that's fine because like I said God's grace is enough what
God's doing he done that cross is enough absolutely but there have been
moments where it's like we know that we know we need to do something and it's like
God just honors you in that moment to say like you did it
You know like well done and
It's just so cool. I love it. Last thing I want to ask you about is your friend Andrew you and Carla's meet you a friend Andrew
Because I just love how earlier in the episode you were talking about people that plant the seed and
There's people that plant the seed in our life that and you always underestimate the seed planner because you don't always, you know, they're the person you don't always
see, you know, they're not the person on the cover of the book of course, it's just like in Moses'
life. Everybody talks about Moses, nobody talks about Aaron, but like Aaron is the only reason Moses
had the courage to get up and go back because Aaron spoke for us. There's always like a, there's a
partner in this and what it seems like Andrew Didin y'all's life getting out to the place it was
was just amazing. So tell it to the people out there who you know are under estimating the power
being the person that plants to seed. Yes, Andrew, man, I have so much to say about him. Well, first off,
we always laugh because we're like he's the third wheel, but he's not the third wheel. It happens to be, he happens to be the
person that like God really not just planted in our lives, but planted in so many people's lives
to really show them what living for Jesus looks like. Um, he carries and walks in God's peace.
It does not matter what he's going through. And he's been through some crazy circumstances. A little background on Andrew is that he is a refugee from Afghanistan.
He was three years old, shot at running for his life with his family, ended up escaping to
Germany and then making it to the United States. Actually attempted suicide twice. He grew up Muslim and attempted
suicide. I believe at the age of 19 and then again in his 20s and then discovered Jesus
when he was 28 and he was like completely freed at 28 and didn't even understand what
that meant for him. But from then on he's like, I don't care like I love you
You've given me freedom. I'm giving my life to you and he really did
Andrew welcomes homeless people into his home
He will pull them from under bridge and like give them a house to live in he's him
He closed them if somebody's like I really love your watch that that's so cool. He's a cure have it
We're just like you can't just take everything off and give it to people. He's like, why not? It's not raining. It's all gods.
So we've just learned like, um, complete piece. We've learned complete, um, like just loving
on God's children and what it means to really live for God through Andrew. And he has just been
our biggest encourager and cheerleader since then.
I mean, he's our closest friend.
I don't know what else to say about Andrew other than he's
like the third person in our walk and it's amazing.
It's awesome.
I just love that.
I loved in the book, Carlos, called Andrew in this particular moment
and Andrew helped lead into Jesus in a way.
And as invited to them in these moments. and like you said, community is so important and
if there is one person in your life that you're inspired by that you look up to
that knows a little bit more than you do. Call that person, reach out to that person,
message that person, and have a coffee with that person.
He'll change your mind. I mean Carlos, Carlos literally, he was not a Christian guy.
Like, hey, new God, yeah, yeah, sure.
Like, this God thing, like, I'm sure he's real, but like, never pursued him.
And when he saw Andrew walking through peace and any in all relationships,
Carlos finally called him, he's like, why are you still happy all the time?
And Andrew's like, well, he's like, why are you still like peaceful and happy all the time?
And Andrew goes, Jesus, and Carlos, like, you're crazy. There's no way. It's not Jesus.
Carlos hung up. And then he called him back a couple hours later. He was like, okay, really?
Is it Jesus? And Andrew's like, come to church with me on Sunday. And I'll show you, like,
why I have peace. Carlos showed up to church and literally like that pastor spoke exactly what Carlos was going through in his life
That Sunday and most was like I'm in I'm in and then I'm that I'm not on the Thursday after that Sunday. Oh my gosh
Oh, I see that's amazing and that's what I mean by seed play like you don't have to be the pastor in that scenario
You don't have to be the Carlos in that scenario. You don't have to be the Carlos in that scenario.
You don't have to be the worship leader.
You can be the Andrew, the one who's living a life for Jesus,
who's living in the fruit of who he is,
peace, love, joy, all the things,
and so on, Causian says, what's this about?
And that's when you say Jesus,
and it's just so awesome.
Well, I like to say you're a huge inspiration.
You and Carlos set the tones so well
for how to just say say firm in your faith,
but also go out and do all the things to be in the world but not of the world. And I just
appreciate your influence so much. And thanks for living, living the life for Jesus and sharing
with us all about it. Love you, friend. Baby, I love you. Thank you so much. One for having me,
and two for just always being a great encourager to us and to everybody who listens to you because man the Lord wants
that and he honors that so much. Thank you so much. Well have a great day on set.
Go crush what everyone doing. We love you so much.
Thank you. Love you. I like so thanks for making it work. Thank you.