Wolf and Owl - S3 Ep 38: Weighted Vests & A Rowdy Wolf

Episode Date: July 17, 2024

We’re talking… Euros consolations, getting stuck in a weighted vest, pigging out after exercising, Japanese milk buns, Spanish lagers, an over-excited Wolf at Boxpark Wembley, melancholic zoos, show-off flamingos, top 5 Disney songs, Avoidance issues, cancelled Meerkats and a new tattoo for the Owl. Plus, Rom and Tom have a go at hard-hitting news and current affairs chat. Look out The Rest Is Politics, there’s some new guys in town… For questions or comments, please email us at [e-mail] - we’d love to hear from you. Instagram - @wolfowlpod TikTok - @wolfowlpodcast YouTube - www.youtube.com/WolfandOwlPodcast Merch & Mailing List - https://wolfandowlpod.com A Shiny Ranga Production For sales and sponsorship enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Yo, what you want? Beak or jaws? Feathers or fur? Sharp teeth or feet with claws? Whatever's preferred They'll grant you all ass requests to steady your nerves Then podcast a body parts, get severed and served Bring your weak shit, wear the wolf and owler That ain't just a mistake, that's an awful howler Both of them are known to pull up at your shows Have the crowd witnessing the murder like they're rolling with a gang of crows Fuck their censorship, let em see the whole thing They stay dressed to kill, never sheep's clothing Dark enough to turn the sun to the moon, you'll see nothing All you hear's a huff and puff and a...

Expect killings, red spilling and flesh ripping Impressive innit, the death bringing its head spinning Just kidding, every word in this song's about two grown men Dressed up as a bird and a dog And welcome to the wolf and Alice of Jude wolf and our podcast this morning They clearly start with early start festival Tom's got a busy day ahead of him. So he's requested a 7 a.m Yeah off the back on the back as well of last night's activities mmm which is where Tom and I absolutely got on it no it's the then the the

morning after the Euro final and I know look I know there's some people that don't like talking about football but well first of all Spain were a much better team let's not get let's not get yeah, they're amazing but let's not get too into the mechanics of it all My day yesterday. Yeah, I posted an Instagram video about this. I bought weighted vests for me and Lisa Yeah, I like the fact that you really went against everyone else on social media who's posted I'd sort of forgotten not that I'd forgotten

I need the gamers happening but this weight I got this weighted vest and then I posted video for about the game. I'd sort of forgotten, not that I'd forgotten, I knew the game was happening, but I got this weighted vest and then I posted a video and I thought what the fuck am I doing? Why have I posted this video on the day of the year? Nobody's going to give a shit. I found it quite refreshing, I've got to say. I was sort of knocked a bit silly by a constant stream of people posting about the game. People who seemingly have never ever watched a football match in their life were sort of posted about it So as you sort of scrolling through Instagram, they're finding you have sort of You're the person sort of sit for like you felt like you drew a line in the sand and you were like, you know

What I'm not gonna do a football video. This is gonna be all I do a video about Yeah, yeah, and it and I think people really I mean? Just somebody just plowing his own furrow. Just going against this constant football. Because usually you like jumping on. Do I? Like I said, usually you'll test your message about Glastonbury. Yeah.

I mean, the number, honestly, I don't know if you, a couple, it was about a whole week I did nothing but swifty posts It was relentless, but um, so I bought this weighted vest For Lisa bought one for Lisa one for me. We're not for a walk yesterday. I met the matching ones, right? Yeah Yeah, mom might be a different color, but same brand. Yeah. Anyway, I I just didn't know how to use it that it had all these plates in it, right? So you can Add or take away plates to increase or decrease. We're talking about what weight so mine one goes right up

It goes up to 20 kg, but you don't want to start with you don't want to start with that Although I'm gonna shout out my DPD driver Steve Not my driver, but the guy that dropped off. What was I going to say? You've got your own DPD driver now. I just realised the wording of that. It's like I just uncovered my soft underbelly for you to give it a shot. Literally, yeah, you're like, living life so ritzy, you have your personalised DPD driver.

Need to put on a white vest to take the kicker that Tom's going to give me off to say my driver. Steve Clegg, sitting at the England, going, I've got a new job. Yeah, well my strength and I can Ever get stuff delivered like once a month or whatever, but he wants me to be on call He's got he's got me on a routine. Yeah. Yeah, well my money just says outside It's house waiting for him to sort of think about ordering a part I'm just sitting at the end of the drive minutes three miles long as it is, and I'm just waiting like a UPS guy will come up and I'll go, I'll take it from him.

As soon as he clicks order completed, he'll shout out the window, Steve, you need to get on this. Steve, can you help me get this, mate? Well, usually he'll send a button up and I'm open to come and tell me. Anyway, Steve is, I don't know how usual this, not how usual, but I feel like we formed a relationship with Steve.

So like he brought- What, like gentle banter. Yeah, he brought the white invest in he goes It just goes I don't know how you're gonna do this right because it's so heavy because he's sure you've not overdone this Like just it was a funny guy and then he came and delivered something else yesterday And he Lisa answered the door and he said surprised to not see you in your white invest Lisa Yeah, cheery really cheery guy big I'm a big not see you in your weighted vest, Lisa. It was really good. So you knew that I was wearing a weighted vest? Yeah, cheery, really cheery guy. I'm a big fan. I like the sound of Steve. Yeah, I like the sound of Steve.

Really nice guy. The world needs more Steves. Yeah, so I didn't, so basically there's two straps that go around the front of you, so you undo it and you open the vest out, right? So I didn't realize that because I'd not read the instructions. There's no instructions.

Was he trying to put it over your head? Yeah, I tried to put it over my head. Oh my God. And then as I'm pulling it over, like I get one of my arms through and then my head gets jammed like sideways in the vest. Yeah, it's so impossible. Yeah, I can feel something go in my neck as I do it, right?

And then I started panicking. That's where your dignity was sitting. Yeah exactly and then I start panicking that I'm stuck in the vest so I've got one arm up like this my head sideways and I start going Lisa Lisa Lisa I can't get out of this. Steve! Steve! Lisa Steve! He's having a cup of tea, Earl Grey at the kitchen bar. Anyway, we get the vest on. Lisa helps me. She's done it fine, by the way. She didn't know that you could open either,

but slips it over absolutely fine, because she's flexible and has normal mobility. We go out for the walk. I did two walks yesterday in the weighted vest and a workout, Tom. Wow, Jesus. Like really on it. And then-

Yeah, I didn't do anything like that. Yeah, and then we had my mom round, Din, Claire, the kids, friction in his family came round. And then I proceeded to inhale snacks, beer, just absolutely, all of the good that I've done in the day. And also Tom, let me just give this a bit of context.

I am eating and drinking out of pace with everybody else in the evening. Yeah, my, Katherine's complaining about the level of how quick I eat at the moment. Katherine said your eating speed's gone so fast, it's just off the written. She's like, you're inhaling food. It's so, there's sometimes where like,

where these like little vegetable spring rolls which are a delight by the way as a M&S. Of course, well. Dinesh by the way loves that vibe. Oh he's right on it. He loves an M&S like a parity. He loves an M&S anything that boy. Yeah he literally is. Do you know by the way if you want something nice from M&S, get a Japanese milk like a parity. He loves it. He loves it. MNS anything that boy. Yeah, no, he literally is upset. Do you know by the way, if you want something nice from MNS, get a, or you probably can't have them.

The Japanese milk buns, they're incredible. Really? Oh yeah. Literally get them a little bit of salty bar. I mean, these are things you can't have, but they are delicious, bruv. So, what is the, what is the, what is the milk bun?

It's a bun so soft, so gentle. It means no one any harm. It's just a very, very delicious bun. Like I say- So you're not talking about a stuffed bun, you're talking about just a block of bread roll? Yeah, yeah, a lot of bread roll, but it's very much a bun.

You'd feel terrible putting it on a shelf with other bread buns. It wouldn't be out of last. Bread buns have got quite a gregarious side. This is soft, it's gentle. The Japanese milk bun, I'd tell everyone in life to go and try it once. Just for you to see if it's got any,

I don't know, I'm assuming it's called a milk bun, it's got milk in it. Yeah, but it actually makes me sad that you'll never touch one or taste one. Yeah, well thank you for your empathy, I appreciate it, man. So you you'll never touch one or taste one. Yeah. Well, thank you for your empathy I appreciate it man, but so you put a little bit of salty butter on so we bar Absolutely Delicious well on more than one occasion. I was walking across a room finishing a spring roll

Realizing that I hadn't really acknowledged. I was eating it. Did you know I mean by that? Yeah But you're supposed to consciously eat, aren't you? Yeah. There's a couple of times where I sort of popped the last bit of a spring roll. It's a bit like the last bit of the drive as you approach your house. You sort of don't remember it

because you're in autopilot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is what happened with the spring rolls on more than one occasion. It was pretty shameful. How close are you to sort of, so when you're finishing one you've got another ready lined up just to go in?

Mate, sometimes I'm taking two or three at a time because I know that might be a situation. You know what, I'm just, I'm just probably discussing around the prawn crackers. I will literally, I'll become almost like a country not giving up its borders when it comes to fucking prawn crackers. I will literally, someone comes over,

I have no, you fuck off, these are mine. I need my own bag. If I'm getting a Chinese takeaway, a Thai meal, I need my bag of prawn crackers. That's how it happens. Do you dip them? Oh, of course, not double dip, I dip, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Little peeking sauce. I was talking double dipping with the the boys recently. And without naming your names, one of them doesn't see an issue with double dipping. Alex is doing double dipping. Charlie, I'd imagine. Well, I'm deliberately protecting their names. I like that. Thank you for guessing twice. But it's unacceptable. Anyway,

doesn't matter. The stuff you said about your boys all the time. This is is the thing you think will stick with them. Yeah, this is my line in the sand. In 15 years time, one of them's going for a job and they're like, you're brilliant. You're, oh wait there. I don't think I can go, Nathan, I listened to your father's podcast when it was still going. You're the double dipper, aren't you? Yeah, no, it happened a couple of times, but I don't... No, I'm sorry, Alex, we don't condone that kind of behavior. You'll have to get a job elsewhere. But Steve, dad said a funny...

No. Very nice. Really nice, mate. A callback, a little callback. A gentle callback on the gentle move. Yeah, it's really nice. A callback, a general callback on the general. Yeah, it's really good. Anyway, it was a sad evening. Did you find that the food compensated for the game? Also, yeah, sorry, go on. You sounded really eager there.

No, no, because I keep saying about the sadness of the game. And I don't want to go on about too much about football, because quite frankly, I'm fucking bored myself talking about it. It isn't sadness. We rode our luck for a whole tournament. We played well. I think it's worth saying that the best, Spain were incredible, deserve to win. England, the lads out there like you, I love those boys.

They gave us some very special moments. Ollie Watkins, 90th minute goal, an amazing moment an amazing moment the redemption of soccer the penalty shoot out an amazing moment Sackers goal an amazing moment. Yeah, Bellingham to overhead kick an incredible moment Harry Kane Yeah, these are amazing moments. Just take the moments Don't stop like the end of the tournament itself the best team by a long long way like. Like genuinely, the amount of people I saw as well go, fucking, that was a lucky goal at the end. We had lucky moments for that whole thing. Spain were just an incredible side.

Well, look, as you said, you don't want to go on about the football for people that don't like football, but I went into watching that game thinking two things, and I don't mean this in an unpatriotic way, because obviously I really wanted England to win, right? One, that Spain have had a difficult route to the final, and for one thing, they've had to beat a lot of good teams to get there in a way that even- Wait, they beat the two best teams

they've beat France and Germany? Two, Spain easily the best team in terms of actual football. Like just just incredible set of players. That, anyway, I'm not going to start naming players, but the point is they're a great team. So I sort of sat down going, thinking to myself, we are probably going to lose, but who knows what can happen. It's tournament football, right? The old cliche. So you just go, let's see what happens where the truth is There's an argument that T1 kind of flattered England. Yeah, you know because they they were

They were running particularly like there's there's five minutes in the second half or I thought this could be like five minutes Absolutely go for it. So it is what it is and you know England England did what they did whatever I went to Box Park where a different my two smoothers running event because I blow my two smooths like you know when you watch the coolest people you've ever met yeah one of the coolest people we all know this right one thing is that Box Park is absolutely pumping I got there at 630 yesterday and it's all down to Martin Two's. He has these England fans just in the palm of his

hand. The songs he's playing, the hype he gives it, an incredible thing to behold. He is one of those people where, and I'll put you in this bracket, where sometimes you watch what they do and you just go, you are, it's just like a pleasure to watch you do that. You're just so good at doing that. So good at it, but also so infectiously lovely. Like just a real, a real gentleness. I would say that probably actually within that place, a lot of good gentle styles, a

lot of good people, lovely people to few people that I'd'd say I could feel a helmet pivot coming on her gone. Yeah Is here I'd say a few people that I arrived and for all Other cut of points before Martin wanted me to go on then announced the team news and I Had a point so there was a number of lagers on offer. I had a Magary right? I had a point so there was a number of lagers on offer. I had a Magui right The shit that I got for ordering a Magui like at first I thought it was a joke. It's a Spanish lager One guy got so volatile with me. I genuinely

Know I swear on what go why why you drink your bag right? And I was like, well, it's that it's a refreshing. It's a lovely little guy. I thought he was joking He went my fucking you can't be having Spanish things in the day of a game like this mate card is fucking I mean, I'm so glad I didn't see him at the end of the day. Is this real? I swear mom he was like literally and then these mates started goading me and then they were coming over going I like you mate. So I see you having a fucking Maghri I know they're obviously pulling my leg a little bit, the aggression towards me having a spank. I was like, the only other option is that I'm not having a carling. It's not 1993. Can I ask you a question Tom? What was your role at Boxpark Wembley? Well to be quite honest with you, I was asked by a friend of mine to go down there through Martin

I then text mine said what we're doing. He said just come down. It's a great vibe Might get you to jump up on on stage I would tell you now then I was very nervous about this but on the basis that I had no idea exactly what I was doing there as I arrived Neil Ruddock and John Barnes John Barnes was just finishing off the rap, the England rap. Then Neil Ruddock did a massive shout out of Three Lions which went down very well. Then you're looking at thinking, oh great, as a comedian I've got to follow these two. You're sort of feeling a little bit, because you're sort of thinking, well on one hand the

atmosphere is great, on the other hand I've got to follow John Barnes' England rap and Razor Ruddick singing three lines. Three lines. And, you know, I'd say that those lads have both been there a couple of hours and were far more oiled than I was. So then I just think, well, just think tank a few pints and then see what happens. Then Mike comes up to me. Yeah, brilliant shot. Usually I never do that before going on stage, but this is a very different environment. Everyone there is leathered. I don't want to be the only sober bloke going on going, hello everyone, it's how we do it, but if we don't win, like, remember it's all about. I think some of you have got so drunk you don't understand how nuanced this banter is. Doing a bit. Tell a joke we know. Where's Ramesh? What should we do with football? Because you sort of think about, like, listen, like, you think about football, it's a bit like, it's a bit like a paella. Don't name Spanish,

right? No, I mean, like, we can't have another. It's a bit like a roastella. Don't name Spanish food right now. I mean, like a little bit of an obvious. It's a bit like a roasted, isn't it? Like in terms of like you've got your you've got your back line of raced potatoes and then sort of sitting right in front of them is your is your turn. You're trying to pick food. You should you should put in. Um, so so then Mark comes up to that. I will get you to announce the team news. And I imagine knowing Martin as I do

would have been incredibly gracious and supportive in helping you figure out what you were going to do when you get up there. Oh yeah, he was amazing and he was like do the team news, I'll ask you a couple of questions and then if you want to do a sort of sing a bit, you know, that would have made me immediately angry. Well it's's because I just seem raised about anyway so then I'm a few more points I Didn't I go on just trying to figure out if you can remember the words to two German bombers, yeah I can't good stage in the city. So I do the team news And I do it very much. I'd give it everything I've got.

To the point where Martin says I wasn't expecting it to be quite that big. What did you do? And that's why Martin, I was genuinely like, Ingo, I'm over, Mr. Jordan. But you know, like how I intro myself on stage. That's good, that's great, that's exactly what it needs. It's great when you've got,

but when you get to Luke sure You realize that you've still got four players to go in your voice is fucked. Yeah And then I did do Bellingham at the end and then I broke a broker out into hey Jude and sang Mike kicked him with hey Jude and I Was singing hey Jude and then this is awful and then I got so into the moment That then Martin sort of like shook my hand and so cut Yeah, I got me this lovely cuddle was like gave me a lovely sort of like that someday is everyone and He sort of went to leave stage and then people started singing three lines and I stood on

I did like pretty much the first two verses and the first two choruses, the three lines. And then Mike came back on the stage and sort of, you know, pointed at me and was like, yeah, everyone's on Davis. And then sort of smartened. And then people started singing the I Don't Want Wanna Go Home song. And I started singing that, which actually felt quite almost... So now I'm like three songs deep. I've almost done half an album.

And then genuinely Martin sort of put his... he was smiling and he was like, hey, hey, hey, hey. And then someone else was just sort of beckoning me off and sort of, I then sort of came on stage and then sort of walked through the crowd sort of like. I felt so pumped. I was like, I know. Did you take your shirt off? No, I didn't take my shirt off.

But I'm gonna be honest, mate. I was probably, I was probably, yeah, I was probably a chorus of Vindaloo away from taking my shirt off. I think if mine had kicked in with Vindaloo I'd have been half naked up there. God. You know the worst thing I was then on sort of so elated as I sort of just delighted I've not heard the worst thing yet but go. Oh no then I get into the bar and I'm just like still absolutely like buzzing so I'm like I'll have a couple more drinks.

At this point I imagine you're the man at the moment right? Everybody's like the people coming up to you going that was amazing. I would say man at the moment I would the man at the moment, right? Everybody's like the people coming up to you That was a nice a man at a moment. I would say man a moment I was sort of like people were oh you yeah you Were you nervous before you got up there because you sort of felt quite so if you yeah at first you felt quite Sort of going from Somebody whose complains about the toxicity of England fans to becoming it. Well, this is the worst thing about me as a human being is that I'm a massive hypocrite. If I'm going to be honest, what I loved about it was there was a very good vibe in there.

There was a few, obviously there's always going to be a few dickheads. What I also noticed is a lot of people, I know that there's quite a few tables of women who felt like they'd been brought along, like wives or girlfriends who weren't necessarily into, like who felt like they'd been forced to wear an England shirt and come along, who looked even during the game like genuinely like,

I wish I could be anywhere else but here. And I don't think that's because of football, but I don't know if you've ever been in the box park. It's a lot of fun, but it becomes very, I've watched quite a lot of games in there, but it becomes very raucous, I'd say. And it was, oh, this is awesome. This is, I might as well give you this,

because some of them are, everyone was throwing their beers up in the air when I was singing Three Lions, and then I got my point and threw it into the crowd. Oh my god. I'm just gonna give you that. Oh my god. Yeah. I got so into it. The energy that you started this episode with of sort of being above it all just sort of quiet contemplation being quite measured and then to know that you were bare-chested hammering a pint into the crowd at Box Park last night. This is all about 7 p as well. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, by the way, before anybody starts gets in touch, have a go at me. When I said about the toxicity of England fans and Tom, that was only joking. OK, because I get into a lot of shit.

I say I don't quite melancholy day on the run up to it. We took grace to the zoo. We had quite a nice day. When he said this is a zode website, OK, who stayed so? Yeah, we acquired. It was quite, it was an enjoyable. I would say that the, I had a bit of a weird thing with the zoo. I enjoyed the zoo. There was, again, what was quite funny is there was quite a lot of men there who clearly

didn't want to be there. There was two modes of dress at the zoo yesterday. Even England shirts from anywhere from sort of 1996 through to the modern day. Was that just to make sure the chimpanzees knew which team they're following? Yeah, yeah. Makes sense. Just literally standing by the three lions. One guy, there was three lions in the enclosure.

I went, oh look, there's three lions. And one went, oh yeah, like that at the zoo. And my daughter just looked at me. Four flying turns up. Fuck off mate. You're really in this. This is a moment. That, and this is probably more your vibe, there's a lot of dads wearing Marvel t-shirts. Like one guy, like we kept you know like when like you're in a supermarket right and you're on the same aisle uh map like so you're constantly bumping into the same person the same aisle uh we were we were on the same animal map as this guy we were constantly pinging like he had i've never seen anyone so fucking down about being at the zoo he had his baseball cap on back to front which usually usually to me means chilled guy, relaxed, up for a laugh. He was far from it. He looked like he was

really genuinely ready for a fight. And he had a t-shirt that just said Marvel Dad. And he looked like he was anything but a Marvel Dad, if I'm not mistaken. He shouldn't have been allowed to... Why? He looked like... Just because he looked like he couldn't give a... He looked so angry to be there. Quite a few times, his wife, I could see her doing that thing where she was looking at him, aren't you enjoying this at all?

And what was sad is, his kids were really like, you're at the chimpanzees, you get to the penguins, they seem like they're having a right life. By the time they got to the lions, the infectiousness of his absolute disdain had spread through the whole family they're all walking around with their hands in their pockets a lion could have got out for a tiger elephant could have split all up sang fucking under the sea and he still would have been fucking displeased why would an elephant sing under the sea? well it's the best song in the Disney show he's probably like yeah why wouldn't he? and that okay but under the sea is under the Disney show. He's probably like, yeah, why wouldn't he? And that, okay, but Under the Sea is Under the Sea, right?

Yeah, but we all sing it. He's heard it, he likes it. Okay, all right, fine, no, make him. He's got things over from The Lion King just to make you happy. Well, first of all, I would say it's a massive shout out to say that Under the Sea is the best Disney song. That's the first thing I'd say.

It's brilliant. It's good. It's an amazing song. Is it the best Disney song? It's up first one. It's brilliant. It's good. Is it the best Disney song? It's up there in five out any shadow of that. What are your other five? Fuck, you put me on the spot here. I've got to go let it go from Frozen. That's what I was going to say.

Oh, that's what I was surprised that you went for. I even like the... Do you know, can I tell you what I think is better than... It's a... The fixer-upper song from Frozen is better than under the sun. Yeah, it's quite good. Yeah. Circle of Life without a doubt. Yes, it's got to be there.

Yeah. I'd say from the little part of this world absolutely slays me every time. Gracious to start singing that now. What's the one from Moana? Oh, that's a good tune. Yeah, that's a good tune, yeah that's a good tune. Anyway. Beauty and the Beast, yeah, beautiful, beautiful bit of music and probably I'd have to throw into the mix a whole new world as well. Tom, I really genuinely said what's the rest of your top five to spangle you there but you looked to that challenge, you took it face on and you wrestled

it to the ground and for that I applaud you. Very much like the elephant spread out. You have my admiration my friend. I feel like an empathy now with the elephant who's just going out of the way but yeah but what I'd also say, I don't know if you've noticed this when you're at the zoo. I don't really go to the zoo but yeah. Yeah obviously because probably the ethical thing of being a vegan, but it's like, actually, if anything, you should be going to the zoo and showing off.

Why would you mean? Because I'm pretty respected because you're a vegan. You don't eat meat. Actually, the lines and all that thing, you're a dickhead. But you have like, kindred thing with like the hippos. The hippies turned up. What's up, mate? Oh, yeah, you don't eat animals, do you?

Put that Jordaner gammon down Wait till he goes past, it makes him sick Oh no mate, look at this prick Look at this prick I tell you what, really tuck into it as he comes past Fucking wanker You fucking vegan wanker I love the idea of you walking past a lying case

and just going WANKER! Do you want some tofu you fucking piece of shit? Oh, for fuck's sake. Well, what I noticed was, like, there's some animals that deserve like, you know, and like this is, you know, in the scale of animals when you go in like, at a zoo, you might see him, you might not. You see a lot, you see a big cat or a bear is fucking, you know, Oh my God, look, you might see him, you might not. You see a big cat or a bear, it's fucking,

oh my God, look, oh look, yeah, that's incredible. It's a big, look at the size of him. God, you wouldn't wanna, you know. That inflection of your voice, right, it should be fucking held back for really amazing fucking. Like if you're in a crib. Yeah, you gotta save that reaction for a bit. What annoys me is if you see a meerkat or you see something crappy like that,

one of those little shit ones. Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom. I, I, the inconsistency of your personality and value, set of values, is absolutely insane, by the way. No, no, no. Because most of the time, if I caught you on another day doing this podcast you're gonna just say something Could I just say something? I just want to give a shout out to me cats cuz I

Will see you more corner so and you get these obvious ones like the lines and that obviously they get their credit You sit in the meerkats people are not showing me cats love and I feel I just put an arm around a meerkat I said listen fella. You're doing a great job here okay I respect you I love you you're my kid for my kid and now for some reason today you've decided they're little shit shit ones shit ones you said but what I'm saying is this right the meerkat does not deserve the big ups that like if you see a lion or a bear what you've obviously got some fucking kith thing with fucking meerkats. I'm not got a kith thing with meerkats. I've got a boner for meerkats.

But what I'm saying is like, I'd say like just because you're a meerkat you don't deserve a positive reaction. No mate, you deserve, all animals deserve like, oh fucking all right it's a meerkat. Or you don't say fucking everything because you get in trouble for that. Well no, meerkat, it doesn't like, what I'm saying is there's a big cat or you don't say fucking a lot soon because you get in trouble for that Well, no, but make out it doesn't like what I'm saying is there's a scale to this right you see it like oh my god Look quick quick quick everyone a lot. You can't do that with like I don't know. I'm trying flamingo It's not the same the flamingos by the way can I say the flamingos are lurking man the whole time? There's no like there's no hiding from the flamingos. Okay, I can man. Oh, yeah. All right You can say that the show-offs flamingos are shafts

There's no there's no sense of production to the flamingo Beautiful looking creatures right? Where's the line sense of production it hides for ages and when it pops out you're fucking I would say yeah Oh my goodness actually one here. Yeah. All right, there's a bit of a Same as your Ross your awesome shot jobs all day long There's a bit of a... Same with giraffes. Giraffes, I shout at giraffes all day long. The giraffe enclosure was rammed.

We got to the front and we held fast for quite a while because Grace loves giraffes, which I'm happy about. Talk to the tallness of them and all that. Giraffes are out, they're having a right laugh, they're eating food and they're just sort of like putting on a bit of a show. And they all go in, they all go in. And people are like, oh, the draft's out.

Yeah, mate, they've all gone inside. We missed them. Who knows when they'll be out again. Whereas the flamingos are just there to be seen the whole time. Yeah, sure, okay. I mean, look, I think you're gonna, I think you're gonna look back on this

in maybe days to come and regret some of the things that you've said today. Look, if I've offended anyone who likes swimming goes and stuff, I'm awfully sorry. Well, you said sh... Meerkats, I think, really, shit ones. I direct quote. Look, this is... That is slightly a hangover Tom statement. I know that Grace had an absolutely amazing time for the meerkats, but they're quite thirsty. That's my only point. They didn't deserve the same vibe that a bear does.

And when you see the bear coming out and like, by the way, the bear came out. Shout out bears, man. This bear comes out, he had a massive paw, right? And round the paw that this paw he's got is a tiny little like, you know, a little edge to it, like a swimming pool with a little edge. He basically walked along the edge,

so he had to go single pool. It was like a balancing act. It was like a little show he put on. I was like shouting, it was like the England game. I was like, come on, look at him. Look at this guy, look at this nutter. People gathering around. Do you throw a pint in?

No. Take my top off. Three pairs on. Do you throw a pint in? No, to my top office. Free pass on you. I have got myself into a little bit of trouble on this podcast. I don't know if you're aware of this. No, no, no. A couple of weeks ago we made a couple of jokes about shows being cancelled. We did a little riff about pretending it's a two series arc and then the commissioners

take care of that. Anyway, a few days ago, I'm having lunch with Ben Green. Right? Sweet Ben? Yes, sweet Ben and midway through the lunch he looks at his phone And he goes oh And I go what and he goes just had an email It goes what did you say on the podcast about avoidance and I said nothing why they said we've had a message from TV zone

Saying Ramesh has said that avoidance has been cancelled Can you confirm or deny? And he goes, what did you say? I said, well, I didn't say anything. I don't think I even mentioned avoidance. Yeah, I think you did, yeah, yeah, you did. Well, anyway, that's been picked up on by the papers. And basically, there's a few headlines going around

that Romesh Ranganathan confirms cancellation of avoidance on his podcast. So what's becoming clear to me is we need to be more careful and what I would say is I probably should have told you that before you went in two-footed on the meerkats. Yeah, I mean after the meerkats have they been dropped from, I mean obviously you don't want to go in double-footed again, have they been dropped from, because been dropped from something that's about the meerkats for a while Well, I don't I've not seen I don't think they're doing that. That's all the Because well, the adverts not running at the moment. I don't think I'm not saying

Everywhere they were like fucking global superstars. Yeah, but you can't keep doing you could give it to that They were fucking they were doing it. We've got well, listen They jobs done because as soon as you see a meerkat, you think of that advert. So now, literally they could just do an advert where they don't even name the company. They just have a meerkat wandering around. It was pretty impressive.

Can I say, it's gonna be absolutely fucking sold to show him for those meerkats in the advert to go back to like a zoo. I go, I don't think we see you again. He's like, yeah, okay, that'd be great, mate. Now I don't know what level we're operating at here. Okay. I'm just saying, within the world that we're talking about, like if imagine if...

Within the world that we're talking about. So I just want to get clear what it is you... At what level do you want me to engage with this conversation? Alright, because I'm engaging... There's one of two options here. At what level do you want me to engage with this conversation? Because am I engaging... There's one of two options here. One, we're getting into a role play where we believe those meerkats are real things. Or two, you're on Ketterman.

All right? And you... No, no, no, no, no. My point is this, right. I'm aware that they're not real meerkats. OK, fine. It's just difficult. What you've not done, you've not gone... Imagine if they were real and those fellas had gone... Yeah, but I'm giving you and the listeners the benefit of the fact that I don't think any of you are going to go, Oh, fucking hell, they're not real meerkats.

Right? We all know they're not real meerkats. My point is this, you're talking about avoidance being cancelled Potentially no and what I meant to you and Ben I was just saying that I was saying in another world Right those mere cats essentially you you me Ben Green having to go back to the zoo Having literally hang out with like Arnold Schwarzenegger fucking Al Pacino Jennifer Lawrence Tom did you watch avoidance? Sorry, sorry, sorry, Tom, did you watch Avoidance? I don't... My point is this, right, and then all of a sudden they're back in Whipstay 2, right? And they're, you know, they're not even a headline act anymore.

Yeah. Like, you know, they're the thing that you go to on the way to something else. Yeah. And that's heartbreaking. Yeah. I guess that is the circle of life. That's what Elton John was singing about in some sense. Yeah, I think that's what he was thinking about when he wrote the song about some CGI meerkats going back to the zoo for some

reason, some weird roleplay scenario that Tom has set up. That's a film I'd watch actually that could really bust through. That's actually if I was in control of the meerkats now if I was their agent, I would be turning around saying saying, you know what? No, no. They've got a brand that's very successful. What if we do a thing where you all, you like, you know, in a kind of Anchorman or like, you know, a Warfell or something, they have to go back to the zoo and then build themselves back up. I don't think it's a bad shout for an advert.

What I think is weird is you flitting between this being imaginary and real, it's like, it's mad. But I'm saying, yeah. It's very difficult to hold onto this conversation. As you say, everyone knows those meerkats. I'm saying now, I don't know who looks after them. I hope to God they've got a good agent who's also there. What's happening now?

What's happening now? Everybody knows they're not real. Everyone knows they're not real, but someone owns the IP of what they are, right? Okay. What I'm talking about is there's a realness to them They are there they do exist whether it's a or whatever Right, you know they are right you've seen them

Well, what I'm saying is they can't just disappear out into the ether and never be seen again Well, they can they can they can really? Yeah, like the Shambossi yogurt The the Shambossi hippo we we fondly think back and you just wish to go on. At some point someone would have reached out and gone, let's do something. This hippo's got more than we know. Do you know what I mean? What I'm saying about is, you can't just write things off. You've got to look around and go, you know what, these meerkats, they brought so much joy. And look, I'm not now sticking up for meerkats because I've already gone in on them. So saying they can actually do a lot of good

But it's the underdog story, right? I think I think I think we might have to we'll record this at the end We're just doing intro just for just to make it work Just go welcome to the world for now quick one Tom's done acid. Let's get into this. I Just think it's sad if we never see those meerkats again. That's all I'm saying. Okay. If anybody else feels the same way, get in touch, waltfowlpod.gmail.com. You sounded like you were gonna cry then. I just don't know what to do anymore.

You know, the last five minutes of conversation, I've got no idea what's happened. We're talking about meerkats that we definitely know aren't real and what they might do and how sad it is. And you're talking about their agent. I don't know what level of reality we're operating on i feel like i'm in fucking inception i just think it's quite a beautiful thing that if yeah yeah yeah okay I look at things as well and I imagine scenarios like that. Do you not do that sometimes? What do you mean? That your mind spins off when you think about things like that.

Well, I think I told you this story about when I was a kid and I went to watch Lion King and I felt really sad that I couldn't be in that world. That happens to me. Yeah, but we all feel like that. I feel like that with Disney all the time. Sometimes I feel like that. Who do you think you'd have been? You weren't in that world. That happens to me. Yeah, but you all feel like that. I feel like that with Disney all the time. I sometimes have that feeling. Who do you think you'd have been, you were in that world. What? What do you mean?

You were pretty much in that thing. You're the little bird who knocks you around with. Zalzard. With his dad. Ha ha ha ha. I've never seen a podcast host with quite so little hair. You would be major when they when I've remade it recently, but yeah That's actually really Who's it they did it the live-action John Oliver wasn't it? Yeah. It was a good call if you could live in any Disney world

Which would it be? Actually, do you know what I'd quite like? I'd quite like to live in that city that Big Hero 6 is sitting. It's a combination of San Francisco and Tokyo, isn't it? San Frokyo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. San Fran... Yeah.

San, I can't remember what they call it. Anyway, the point is, that was pretty cool. I think Wreck-It Ralph would be quite a laugh to live in. Do you think so? Yeah, I think it'd be all right, Wreck-It Ralph. You've got a bit of a Wreck-It Ralph vibe about you if you don't mind me saying. Yeah, I'll take that. Except in your version of it, people would be dead.

Wreck-It Ralph would be good actually at Boxpark. Wreck-It Ralph would be good at Box... What do you mean to put it on? Yeah, to keep building. Do they put on films at Boxpark? No, obviously we should try and start... We can put on gigs at Boxpark and it'd be electric with my two smooths Yeah

It's actually I don't know if flows taking offense or something, but she's not really Normally she gets in touch with us after every mad idea on the podcast So don't she's not listened to it yet, but we talked about the Christmas episode not the Christmas episode the Christmas event Don't we and we've had quite a few? And we've had quite a few emails saying, please, can you do that? I spoke to Antonia about it, and Antonia's view was, is this actually real? So, and I was like, yeah, look, we're really pumped for this.

We'll probably have to engage Martin, and then I'm all guns blazing, mate. Yeah, yeah. I mean, you were all guns blazing for us meeting up today and doing the podcast face to face, right? Yeah What's that? I was came in. Yeah, so I mean so You can't I mean I'm supposed to be senior later on in the week. Is that is that? I've definitely seen you later. I'm looking forward to that. We should have done it tomorrow, but you've got a tattoo all day So what we could have done it faces, but I'll cancel it if you want to do if you want to do it face to face

Tomorrow, I'm in No, no, you won't you've had this faces, but I'll cancel it if you want to do if you want to do it face to face Tomorrow I'm in No, no, you won't you've had this time, but where is your newest tattoo? I'm gonna move it. Do what you want to do Do you want to do drugs? We want to have the studio. Look, don't call my plush Would you remember having it where you haven't it I think I've thought about it. Where are you having it? Yeah, yeah. Right there. This little space there. You're going to have a full sleeve soon, aren't you?

I'm trying to get a full sleeve, but it's getting to the point where I can't still be working on this sleeve when I'm like 50. Do you know what I'm saying? Where do you get the ideas for your tattoos? Just whatever pops into my head. What is that? Are you thinking about getting a tattoo? I'm thinking I want a big one on my calf.

What are you going to get? This is the thing I don't know at the moment. Big West Ham? Big West Ham, like? No, no, no. I saw someone with one of those at the zoo. What, the Marvel dad? No, the Marvel dad just had a big hulk right across his back.

Do you know what I think you should do, right? You should put together a little like thing that incorporates some of your things that you like You know you could have that on my car just like have them put a few images together that you like I mean, I've got like loads of hip-hop acts on my on my arm, but you could do some Big Willie Nelson on my fucking no, but you could have like I don't know what sort of stuff going to have a big Willie Nelson on my fucking car. No, but you could have like, I don't know, what sort of stuff you're into. Like a big sandwich. I think a big sandwich. Actually, I would have been quite a cool one.

It's like somewhere in your body having a sandwich. A milk bun you could get on your car. Yeah, a milk bun. A milk bun could scare you like quite a base shit. There's another thing I'm into, if I'm honest. I mean, I think it works. I like one of Billy Connolly, the big yee-in. Oh, there you go.

When you get that. I might get something like that. I know what I'm like though. I'm very addictive in my way. I think if I get one old lady. That's what happened to me. That's what happened to me. But you look great with tattoos.

Yeah, I like one on the shoulder as well, yeah. And I also think you should get genuine. I think you could pull this off. Just a teardrop on your left. You've got to kill someone to have that. Well, yes, no, it's gonna be all the swallows on the hands. What does that mean? I knew the teardrop is killing someone. So what is this? You've been to prison. That's originally what what it used to me I wonder what my dad had it You know what by the way, I just said I really like birds Did it blow your mind the Trump thing? Yeah, that was

There there is there is there is a hilarious video, right? I'd send it to you. But look it up. It's, I can't remember the name of the guy. It's like, I think it must have been like 15 minutes after it happened or maybe 20 minutes or something. So BBC News reporter, I don't know his name, he's lying on the grass, right? So the shot is of just of his face and he's sort of like sideways in the video.

And he's like talking about what just happened. He goes, so there's just been a shooting We're trying to figure out what's happened I think the speech has stopped. He's like doing it like that like really like in the moment I think the speech has stopped We've been told that the speech stops a couple of reports that there may be one or more snipers involved in this situation We're just sort of at the moment, as you can see, we're taking cover. Not ideal, we've only really got this car for shelter. As he's saying all of that,

there's people just walking behind him. Just walking in the street. Just, there's cars driving by. Like, I would get it if the whole area was locked off. Just like a good Gary's chat. Yeah. Just walking past the chat. You just look in the background chat. Yeah. But they're just genuinely, you just look in the background of the video, he's on the ground and they're just walking along

and you still think, they must be thinking what the fuck is that bloke up to? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's an eggy look in it. It is an eggy. Anyway, I distracted off the main thing. What do you want to say about it? I know, it can't, I just think that. The Wolf for now is all about sort of topical style. Let's get to it. Let's get into this. What do you want to say about it? I know it kind of. The Wolf now is all about sort of topical style. Let's get to it. Let's get. Let's get into this. What do you think? I'm going to be honest with you. I I'm not 100% sure of it. Like, are you about to tell me you think it was a set up? Is that you? I'm not sure if it was a sale. I just think if you were going to set up where you're going to get shot on your

whole body, where would you get shot that you don't need to show? Like you're not having to have to take a proper bullet wound. OK, but I also say, by the way, is this out? I'm saying that I've looked into it either way. Either way, I think it's, you know. Yeah, it's it's an insane thing to happen. Right. You don't want to see that happen to anyone. But the way he takes the bullet, if it is like

him taking a bullet, it's like I exaggerate more if I have a wasp go near me not even sting me if I'm in the same fucking vicinity as a wasp I'm more like on edge than that like you know and he took a bullet to the ear he just naps it away then he gets up and he's just so chilled with it hmm yeah I'm not I don't, I don't know. I don't know. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. It's an insane thing to see.

Yeah. If it is, which you know, it probably is, it's an insane thing he took it like. Like even if you were acting it, you would give it a little bit more. Do you know what I mean? I mean, it's impossible to know. Lots of people are making a lot out of the fact of this kid that did it, this 20 year old, is a registered Republican. So there's some questions being asked about that. I think what is sure is that, well, look, it's looking good for Trump. I would say not in terms of the shooting But what I would say is this sort of like what's looking great for Trump

Yeah, it was it was it put someone that it was clearly if it was a shoe and it was clear I'm just a headshot hit him in the ear. Yeah, and never why he's fucking wrong double six there But I mean politically it really does it galvanizes his support and also we've got Joe Biden I know this is not a political podcast but you've got Joe Biden introducing Zelensky as Putin in his latest press you know that so it's not looking good for Biden. Well you would argue he said it's not looking good for America as a whole. Well that depends on whether you're you know pro or anti-Trump. If you're pro-Trump...

Well, yeah, but even the two of them just don't feel very... I genuinely think if the Rock was at 10th of this race late, he'd probably fucking clean up. Oh, he'd smash it. He'd absolutely smash it. You look at him and think, just do it now. Just do it now. If you're pulling the trigger on this Rock, pardon the pun, just do it now. Just do it now. If you were to pull in the trigger on this rock,

pardon the pun. Now's the time. Now's the time. Now's the time. But if you were teeing up a series of events to put Trump back in, this would be it. And near miss shooting and Biden looking like he's really not in full control of this.

Well, the only thing is if now they try and do it, that Biden gets attacked on stage and Biden fights, like, fells the sort full control of this country. Well the only thing is if now they try and do it, that Biden gets attacked on stage and Biden fights, like, fells the sort of like assailant. That's what you have to do. I mean, it would look a bit sus, to be honest. If now, like, if Biden, if they engineer this. They just start trying to outstunt each other. Biden runs from the stage, climbs up the wall,

pulls the rooftop sniper off, starts beating the shit out of him. A week later Trump saves a school bus that's going over a bridge. It gets more and more fucking, more and more crazy. Yeah, but saving that then, yeah. Yeah, it's a, it kind of makes our election look a lot more tame, right? Yeah, I mean, none of that happened to to Keir or Rishi. And listen, I think what we can conclude, whether you're Trump or Biden or Keir Stone or Rishi Sunak, is that Tom and I really out of our

depth when it comes to talking about politics. I mean, that that we can be united on. I have no idea of politics, by the way. I have no idea. I don't. I just you don't have no idea of politics by the way. I have no idea. I don't think that's true. You don't have no idea. You know what you're passionate about, and that is stop the boats. And you're very much a one issue politics guy, and I respect it. That's the only thing I care about. Nothing else.

I turn up at a press conferences and go, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, all right, mate, yeah, but you're going to stop the boats, right? You're going to stop them? Stopping them, yeah? Listen, listen, can I just, I've got a question for you. Look, it's all very well talking about the NHS and what you can do with the movement of resources around that final organisation. And by the way, shout out to the NHS. Can I just say that? Like I put my arm around the NHS and say,

you're a kid. I'll throw a beer for the NHS. You're one of the sweetest souls. But when are we going to stop the boats? Take their oars away. That's my advice. Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, Kier, you're saying a lot of good stuff here about the minimum wage and getting people back to work and I respect that, mate. Right, and I'll put my top back on because this is a serious question now. What's going on with these boats, mate? Right, Tomo, it's about that time, my G. We've covered, I mean, what a series of topics we've covered, by the way, on this, uh, yes, on this fine ship that we call, uh, the Wolf and our podcast, Tom, could you do

us the honors of taking us out here? Salads and snakes, birds and snakes, reals and fakes. Wow. We're talking about holy shit. Sorry. So that was an incredible opening. What am I talking about, friends? I'm talking about the people that you seed and the people that you let in your life. Yo, there's no point letting down a garden. There's beautiful roses, some sweet, sweet dandelions, and then kicking in and putting the weed in the middle.

The people you surround yourself with, they become very much you. They become the garden of your mind. If you cover your garden with pretty flowers and substantial trees, oaks and birches and such, it will make for a stronger, more sound garden. But if you let stinging nettles in and such, they'll eat away at the good flowers. That's a little bit like the people in your life you can have a lot of positive people but if you enter and let some negativity in one two people that will start to rot the apple cart my point is this it's actually quite easy to let the negativity in sometimes it blinds you sometimes they're flash harries it's a guy walks in with a brobeat t-shirt and a pair of tight jeans

and no socks and a pair of loafers and you think he's a bee's knees with his Rolex watch and his slipback hair. You think he's cooler than the guys, but you're normal friends. But slowly it transpires that actually there's an air of cynicism around him and before you know it you'll have to see cynicism around him. Before you know it, you'll have to see out there struggling. It's always good to meet new people, but treat everyone who comes into your life with a little suspicion. And remember, if you're at prison, who would you want to bunk with? That is the moral of every story. Well, thank you so much. I feel like even you were slightly overawed by how you opened that and kind of walked your way back from that. Yeah, yeah. I was honest with you. I didn't expect your reaction and then I thought, well

actually, I've always got to live up to this opening and it didn't really. But the point remains the same. Yeah, really good point. The hip hop super producer Pete Rock has done an album with one of the greatest rappers Common. It's really good, well worth checking out. So JT, could you play us out with When the Sun Shines again from that album, Auditorium Volume 1. And we will see you very soon guys. Thank you so much for listening., yeah, I hope you're not too upset about the football. But just remember, there's always another tournament around the corner, guys, okay.

And that's true. But you know what came home? You know what came home? Friendship and a rhythm through it. You know what came home? Tom to Catherine, and she said, what did you get up to at Box Spot? You're a bit nervous about it.

And he said, I don't wanna to talk about it let's just watch Where's your t-shirt? What? What have you got come on England scrawled across your chest in crayon? What have you got a big G on your stomach? Alright bro I'll see you soon. Take care guys. Love you. Bye bye.

Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye.

Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye.

Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye bye. Where the guns clap and go bravo My pops was a genie living in the bottle Light and dark in us, I owned Vidalago In Pentecostal Chicago at all, please email us at wolfalpod.gmail.com. That's wolfalpod.gmail.com. We'd love to hear from you, mainly because we don't have any content ideas. Thank you.