Woman Evolve with Sarah Jakes Roberts - Placement of Your Faith w/ Natalie Manuel Lee
Episode Date: November 30, 2022It’s the cross for W.E.! So, what better way to flex for the Kingdom than with the homie Natalie Manuel Lee? Off grip, she accredits her parents for planting a seed of faith. Now look at God…multi...plying it & making room for our girl as a producer & host of purpose-driven tv! Sis, do you see yourself as a prodigal daughter or a purpose-filled baddie? Either way, you’re welcome here. With a ready ear to the Spirit, Natalie is redefining purpose as seasonal & chile W.E. felt that for somebody! Hear how being deeply rooted and built up in Christ can keep you from coming off your square—W.E. talkin’ marriage, motherhood, boundaries, and peace! Followed by advice on moment-by-moment faithfulness. With John 3:30 in mind, you’ll be inspired to put your faith on display! This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, First Republic Bank, Lululemon, & Uncommon Goods.
Transcript
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God can't bless you for ten to be or who you compare yourself to.
He can only bless you and the lane that was created for you.
I feel that for somebody.
You don't need no itch, it's a tea you need boundaries.
What?
I don't need your lights, I don't need your validation.
All I need is a God party for me that's there for all things.
All things, all things.
Try.
You know what's interesting about faith?
It shows up everywhere and in everything that we do.
Sometimes it's big and sometimes it's small.
Maybe it looks like you take enough photography
without formal training, that's faith,
or starting a podcast that you have no blueprint for, but you believe will feel avoid and search
self because that is exactly what happened with the Womeningvoth podcast.
My co-host today stepped out on faith to create her own docu-series now with Natalie and
sis hasn't looked back since.
Listen in on her journey and allow it to inspire you,
introducing to some, presenting to others,
the incomparable Natalie manually.
Hey.
Hi.
How are you?
I'm doing great.
Good to see you too.
Thank you for your patience with us.
We've been going from location to location,
having to set up from scratch.
So I really, but I know you're used to this.
I'm so used to it.
And thank you.
And I just want to, before we start,
I just want to give you your flowers.
I appreciate you.
I appreciate your ministry more than you know.
It has infiltrated my life beyond measure.
So I just want to honor you with that.
Thank you. That means a lot to me coming from a fellow sister.
I feel like we live in this intersection, although we haven't spent that much time together,
but faith and culture and the demographic of women who were serving or everyone,
actually, that we're serving.
And so I've definitely been affected by your work and a lot of my friends speak very highly of you.
So I'm looking forward to just getting to know you.
Are you an LA?
I am, and vice versa.
We have a lot of mutuals.
We do, we do.
I have to tell you so they were giving me the rundown.
They were telling me, of course, who your brother is
and then they told me about you.
And I was like, no, the whole family,
the whole family does a thing.
It's like, at what point did you realize like the whole family's doing a thing or has
the whole family always done a thing?
What is this?
What did you all eat growing up?
What, and then tell me, what's the secret?
I should actually be asking you that.
What did you all think?
Okay, from your father all the way down.
No, my parents just fully, you know, they instilled the call, you know, and purpose in
our life and for us. I mean, it wasn't an easy trajectory, but we followed it.
And, you know, it's really, I really encourage to my parents for just planting them seeds, you know what I mean?
And so right now we're all kind of walking in our purpose individually and collectively as a whole.
And, you know, it's really indicative of those seeds growing up.
It's like a lot of times you won't realize all of those things that your parents are given
you.
But in reality, then they come up later, so I accredited it to that.
So were you, have you always been very tuned in to focus on your faith and like the impact
that you can make in the world or did you have a season
where you kind of a prodigal daughter type situation because I have to say I haven't always
felt purposeful in my life. I think a lot of it had a lot to do with just my history,
my own issues with not having self-worth and value and so I kind of didn't feel like my life
really mattered especially because I was coming so far behind. And yet when I got older, those seeds that were there,
those placements of faith that were spring to throughout my life began to spring up.
But I didn't always know that it was true for me.
Hmm. That's a great question. Honestly, it was during the transition. I worked with my brother
for quite some time and from there I felt like a inkling aka the Holy Spirit to
transition out and in that midst of that time is when I felt like who am I?
What am I doing? Am I purpose-filled? What's the point? But in our reality that
season was when I birthed now of Natalie and my conversations
and all that good stuff. So that's probably been the most recent a few years ago where I felt like
what's the purpose here? What am I doing here?
No, I was going to say I love that because I feel like right now that so many of the women that I speak to, I feel like
the culture has diluted the definition of purpose. And it's been diluted with notions of
success or fame or just making money. So I want to know how do you define purpose?
I think for me purpose is just submitting to his will in that season of your life.
And you know, and I think for me, even in that season, as much as I felt purposeless,
there was so much purpose in that season, in that season of rest, in that season of redefining,
in that season of rebuilding.
So for me, purpose isn't necessarily your job title.
Purpose is, what kind of wife you are, what kind of mother you are,
what kind of friend are you? Purpose is submitting, like I said, to the will of God if there's
a season where you need to be obedient and rest. That's there's so much purpose and
rest in the season that you're, you know, that he's calling you to do something for your
neighbor. That's, that's a call and that's purpose. So I think it is. It's so good that
you said that because we're so conditioned, especially in our culture
to be like, I do this, so I'm filled with purpose.
No, in all reality, what you're being is purposeful.
And it looks different in so many different ways.
So for me, it's honestly just submitting to the will of God.
Mm.
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Okay, so I love this idea of purpose being seasonal because when we talk about purpose
we're like, where am I going to land?
Where will I be planted and rooted where I will ultimately begin to be fruitful?
But if we decide to see purpose is something that is seasonal, then it changes the way
we wake up each day because it's like, listen, I don't know what the weather is going to
be today.
I don't know what's going to be coming my way in terms of a text message or a job opportunity.
But if I wake up with the mentality of purpose and I wrote about this and woman evolved,
it's ultimately my goal is to bring purpose to whatever I'm doing.
I have an opportunity to be the hands in feet of Jesus.
I have an opportunity to show love and to show kindness,
but purpose is a mentality, not a destination, and where you are
positioned each season of your life determines what your
purpose is in any given moment.
Ooh, that's a word. Well, there's that. That's it. That's it.
And I think too, it's really imperative to, to chew that, to
chew it and actually swallow it. Because once again, our culture is,
I have to know this grand purpose over my life.
And our reality, like you said, it's every evolving.
There is an evolution to our purpose.
The thing leads to the thing.
There's that one thing that might not lead
to the thing you want to do, but it's leading to the thing.
So in order for you to be able to get to that thing,
you have to first sustain this thing in this season. You know what I mean? And so I think it's
just encouraging for people to not feel so, hey, I haven't reached
that goal yet, but you're in process. You're in
that. You're in that. You're in it for that. You know, so,
yeah. Okay, so what is your purpose in this season of your life?
So many different things.
Wife, rebuilding, you know, rebuilding, you know, what it is to really be a wife, mother,
rebuilding that, what that looks like, creating healthy boundaries.
Saying yes to the assignments that God has called me to, even though sometimes it could look
a little, you know, but really yielding, yielding to that. I mean, I go kind of go back to the basics of once
again, the season is submitting to his will, but for me, it's honestly just getting things
back in order, marriage, marriage literally mom, then work, and understanding what all of
that looks like and what that all entails.
And just fulfilling the call, fulfilling the assignment that I've been destined to do.
Natalie, I try to mind my business, but when you say rebuilding life,
rebuilding motherhood, those were great answers.
But I have to ask, what does that mean?
And just know, I'm a show, whatever you show.
So if we go in there, I will never leave you
after by yourself.
Yeah, but I wonder, what does that mean to you
to be rebuilding, I guess, maybe your role as a wife,
your role as a mother?
I think it's honestly the preconceived notion
of what I maybe thought it was and what it should be
and also what is needed.
And understanding we know, you know, growing up in church, we know that God is the God of
Order.
We know that your first ministry is your marriage.
And then from there it goes to your family.
So for me, it's focusing on that.
And then from there, rebuilding that and then go with work.
I think, you know, if you were to ask me a few years ago, I would have been so focused and centered around work, work, work, work, work, work because
my identity wasn't that. Well, keep it all really under. My identity wasn't that. And
it was like, wait a minute. This is completely, this is why I feel empty. This is why I feel
joyless because I'm putting all my eggs in one basket and thinking that the things that
I'm looking for are going to sustain those things inside of me that I'm desiring, but in all reality, I was completely out of order.
So for me, it's just a season of getting the neck back, getting the head back, a real
lining, and kind of getting back into it.
And also to creating boundaries, I think that that's probably the biggest thing for me
as to much is given, much is required.
You know, as more things as we evolve into work or whatever it may be, the different
season in our life, I know for me in order for me to sustain that, I got to create healthy
boundaries.
And what are those boundaries look like?
So it's really getting things in order and rebuilding marriage and rebuilding, I mean, sorry, rebuilding motherhood
is really just dismantling the preconceived notion
of what I thought it was and what it is now.
And really eradicating those things that the culture says
this is what it should be and our reality, no,
this is what the kingdom says it should be.
And get back.
OK, so this is in my neighborhood.
I'm well familiar with this class,
because I felt like when I met my husband
I'd gone through divorce.
I bought my house.
I had a career path in front of me,
and I felt very confident in my ability
to build a life independent of a man.
I was I was proud of that.
I think especially coming off of the heels of a heartbreak.
The only problem with coming to a sense of pride and identity with building your life outside
of the need for a man is that when you do have one, you have to be willing to restructure
your life to make room for that person without feeling like you're sacrificing
your identity or that you are going to lose yourself in the process. And I feel like the
first couple years of my marriage were more difficult probably than they had to be because
I was so afraid of losing myself in marriage. I was so afraid of losing my voice of letting
someone just be the boss of me.
I don't think I trusted his ability to make room
from my purpose and my dream and the context of our marriage.
And I didn't just want to end up feeling like I gave it all away
for the pursuit of another person.
And I think that we had a lot of friction because of that.
And I've had to rebuild my definition of marriage as well
to not just receive this idea of a woman just,
I hate the word, I hate the conversation
that's taking place around submission
because I think that what people consider submission
is not what submission actually is.
And so they see a woman laying down her life,
laying down her thoughts, her
words, her ability to advocate for herself and her ideas so that a man can be in charge
of her. And I don't really feel like that's what submission is, but that's what I thought
it was. And I struggled with that until I had an idea that really submission for me,
as it relates to my marriage with my husband, is being with a man who has the ability to recognize
that this is my mission, this is his mission,
and he understands that our missions have to work together
and so the responsibility is on his shoulders
to make room for both of our missions to co-exist
and he takes that role very seriously, but not everyone does.
But I think that that is something I definitely have struggled with.
And I think too for me and you as well, I know that you're a leader.
So you're a foreign leader.
And so with that leadership, my counsel always says, lead out there.
But there's certain things that I have to really
understand and let my flesh die to say, you know what, there is strength in submission.
There is strength and allowing someone else to leave, but for so long, not even I just
that wasn't because of who I was, I felt like that was okay in every area in my life.
And all reality, that's not what it is. But to be honest, it's so much better.
It is.
You know what I mean?
It's just like there is no, that friction has gone all those different things.
And then even from, as a mom, I think too, I'm learning as a working mom, just the balance
of that guilt, that guilt can come in.
You know what I mean?
So that's a whole thing within itself of understanding the purpose of my assignments
and the call, but also understanding the purpose of my assignment over my daughter,
my Johns, and what does that look like?
And so that's what the whole rebuilding, restructure for me is.
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I love that I love that we're learning the same lessons about marriage
I love that we're learning the same lessons about marriage. Ooh, because it'd be thick out here when we're...
It'd be thick.
But you know, I feel that there's this desire,
especially I think for black women,
to demystify this strong black woman trope,
and yet in order to let that down,
to take off our cape, and to say,
I want to be vulnerable, I want to be delicate.
We have to be willing to let someone take the lead
in those moments so we can recover.
So when my husband, like my husband was out of town recently,
I usually sleep with like my eye mask,
I have air buds in and I'm like,
if he's out of town, I'm not sleeping with that
because I may have to pull up on somebody
and I want to be able to make sure I can grab that thing
before they push up on me.
He came home, I grabbed my sleep mask up on my air buttons and now I can rest because there's
someone else here who can cover while I am sleeping and I think that that is the beauty
of submission is that I'm going to allow myself a moment to come undone, to fall apart,
to get the recovery that I need while someone else takes the lead.
And when he needs me, I'm on my square.
But when I need him, I've got to be willing to say, I need you.
I need your covering.
I need you to take the lead on thinking.
I need you to take the lead on the decision-making because I don't have it right now.
But that level of vulnerability is something that I don't feel like we're really taught.
We're taught to serve.
We're taught to cater.
We're taught to be strong black women. but I don't know that we're often taught
to just release everything and just be without fear,
without consequence and without thinking
that it makes us weak.
Yeah, and I'll take a level further, I think for me,
I don't even realize that sometimes for me to be
honest and vulnerable was from, I am now, but was from a place of
what was black and that was pride. I was like, wait a minute, hold up. I have this.
Yeah, not me, surely not. I'm so down to earth. What? What? You know, so it was really digging
that, digging that root up and really acknowledging it and making sure that we eradicate that as
well.
And so, you know, it's a beautiful thing to be able to have a partner that reflects you
and also just as a mother and a child to really outwork those things in you that need to
be gone.
So that once you get to the next, you know, we keep going.
Do you think part of balancing motherhood and the guilt that comes with pursuing our career
and purpose is rooted in the idea of women or women existing to serve other people's needs?
And then when we begin to shift that focus a bit, now we're maybe not as present.
We're not at every pickup and drop off. We're not at every single function that we may want to be,
but it's because we're building our lives.
Do you think that the guilt of that is rooted in this definition of service?
And I feel I'm raising two younger daughters right now, they're 13 and six.
And one of the things that I'm trying to do in communicating with them is not just telling
them that I'm working, but like I get to podcast today. That's one of the things that fulfills me,
it makes me happy.
So hopefully I'm placing a seed within them
that it's okay for you to do the things
that bring you purpose to do the things that fulfill you.
And I'm playing with you now,
but tomorrow I've got to do this
and to try and make room for the full definition
of who I am.
So they're not surprised.
I was when I entered into my 30s and realized,
my mother's
a woman like up underneath her, making our snacks and being there for me and having all
of the advice like she had needs and dreams and goals.
She went back to school.
She started a business, but I feel like I found out after the fact and I wonder if there's
a way that we can incorporate it as a part of the conversation we have even when they're
young.
Yeah.
I'm still working on that.
I'm still working on that, to be honest, even it's so funny Friday.
And she's only, she'll be two in December.
I have an event, a conversation I'm hosting on Friday
and one of her friends, like one of her first friends ever.
I mean, girl, she pretty much do, is going away for six months
because I haven't gone away party. I mean, girl, she pretty much do is going away for six months with her having to go on a wave party.
And in that moment, I can't, I'm like, dang, God,
this is the day that I have to go do this.
And this is when I want to be able to be there with her
granted, she probably won't even remember it.
But that's something I had to work through.
I had to work through of like, okay, obviously the sitter's
going to take her and, you know, X, Y, and Z.
But there's still something, it's still a thing that I'm literally trying to find
the peace in.
How about that?
Because it is a wrestle, and it brings me, you know, it's emotional for me because I want
to be the mom that could be at everything possible, but also having to remember that the
assignments in the call
is still fulfilling the things of God that's calling me to do as well as being her mom.
And I'm not doing anything wrong, but of course, some voices can completely tell you a lie
that you're going to go and agree with. You're going to go and agree with it.
And you know, they're not even the truth, but that becomes your narrative.
And so for me, it's honestly a daily struggle to dismantle that narrative that has been embedded
in you saying, oh, you should feel this because of that. But in all reality, it's completely fine.
I would love to know how you dismantle the narrative in real life, like in practicality,
when you're having a moment where that narrative is consuming. You're beginning to feel the guilt.
You're beginning to feel the worry.
What does that look like for you?
Great question.
For me, I go back to, if this is the assignment that I said yes to, and if this is what I'm
supposed to do, and I had peace about this decision, then that is that.
And she will be okay. You know, if I was wrestling with the decision that I made
in the initial ask or whatever it may be,
whatever the job is or whatever the thing that I'm supposed
to go do, that's different.
But if I knew instinctively that this is something
that I was called to do, nothing can waver that.
And of course, as we know, the enemy has a bag of old tricks.
He's going to use that one to make me feel some type of way and start wrestling. So for me, from
a practical pragmatic standpoint, it's really going back to what did I feel when I made
that decision? Was it peace? Okay, I'm going to follow that path of peace, and I'm not
going to allow the enemy to disrupt or corrupt my feeling for this decision.
Okay, and so what I hear you saying is that you've mastered the art of protecting your peace.
And I wonder because you live in this intersection as do I, where you're influencing culture,
you're talking to these movers and shakers of culture, and yet you have a very specific
assignment as it relates to kingdom and establishing the kingdom and revealing the kingdom in spaces
where people may have felt like there was darkness.
How do you go about making sure that you stay potent
and it rooms and conversations and relationships
with people where you could run their risk of being diluted?
Maybe your vision is diluted, your focus begins
to become diluted. How your vision is diluted, your focus begins to become diluted.
How do you stay tight? Well, I'm not gonna lie. I don't know if I've mastered it, but I've definitely found a flow.
And the flow has been, you know, just gotta stay fortified, right? Like, you gotta lean in,
my ear has to be close to his ear. I think for me it's
protecting my peace at all cost when it comes to maybe not going on social
media right before I need to to have these conversations or just creating those
boundaries like I said is the season I'm in and I'm just really creating those
boundaries and making sure I'm filled up so that whatever comes out is him you
know John 3-, as I decrease
you increase in me, that is literally my scripture and affirmation that I go by right before I
have these conversations because it's not about me.
You know what I mean?
It's like I know that I'm assigned to pull out and to reveal the kingdom and the way
that he's called me to it.
But for me, I got to be laser, you know, for me,
I also, it's hard, but putting on those blinders,
day in and day out to really be focused on,
this is what you've asked me to do,
and be clear and confident about the mission,
and be very clear of what it is.
So when I get in that chair, nothing is wavered. And you know, as I'm listening to the guests, I'm
also having an ear to the Holy Spirit. And if it's time, I'm
going to flow. I'm not going to necessarily, I'll flow with
them as well. But I'm not leading the conversation. So for me,
it's really being at a place of being empty and him being
filled in me day in and day out, especially in those moments. So that what comes out is of him.
And what is the compass is of him,
because I love what I do.
It gives me so much joy and so much happiness,
but it is exhausting.
You know what I mean?
It's because there is a fight, there is a battle.
You know, not even the battle of just the things around you,
once you get into that chair, but just your mental.
And so for me, it's, you know,
staying preyed up, listening to worship,
like doing the things that I need to do
and allowing him to do the rest.
And I think that that's probably the biggest key
for me too, is making sure that I'm doing
what I need to do.
Not putting it all on him.
Like, oh God, just show up.
No, what part do you have to play?
Do you need to rest all day before and you start?
You know what I mean?
Do you need to be filled up so that your rest but you're really being restored?
Do you need to just have a clear ear and be able to chill all day and not do anything for
work so that you can't have a clear ear and be able to chill all day and not do anything for work so that you
can have a ready ear.
If you drop new things in your spirit to talk about the next day, so it's really being
expected and being having an ear to hear him before the time comes.
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Do you have a conversation that you're like most proud of
or you're like the Holy Spirit
detoured me or I thought it was going to be one thing or I brought this out of this
person like I need a moment?
Man, I did, oh God, Charlemagne was a moment, Charlemagne the God, that detoured, that really
detoured.
I was like okay where are we going and you know how it is
It's like you have your things you're ready to go but you also are like okay Lord do what you do and then you start to do
He doesn't you like wait hold up calm down right slow down
But what the beauty was the product and the fruit of that was what he gave me which in turn gave the audience
Which prayerfully set people free.
And that's the goal, right?
It's like the greatest way to service a tell your story.
And so for me, it's really getting them
to a place of feeling vulnerable and trusting me
and being able to pull out those things.
And so he was definitely one of them.
Him, Kelly Rowland was also one and C.C. Wyman. C.C. Wyman's is one of them. Him, Kelly Rowland was also one, and C.C.
Winons.
C.C.
Winons is one as well.
Yeah, she, I mean, it's C.C., but she definitely, we just went to a place where I needed it.
I needed it.
It was a conversation where I was asking, you know, she has her song, Believe, and it's
like, well, take me to a place where you stand and you believe and you know
God's gonna do it and he doesn't. Yeah. How do you respond? So we that detoured into something
different but it was a blessing for me and hopefully the others of the viewers and the listeners.
I love it. I love I see a lot of your clips on social media. We talked about this a little bit
just about us having so many mutual friends.
But what I love more than anything is seeing a kingdom girl winning and
seeing a girl out there that is doing it in a way that is relatable,
that feels tangible and makes it look easy.
Even though I know it's not easy, I know that it can be very isolating.
I know that there are very few people who understand the assignment and the position
of where you are and yet you've been placed there
with such intentionality because God touched you on that wall.
And so I just wanna thank you for staying on that wall,
for getting back on the wall when the wind came
and knocked you down, for remember which side of it
you belonged on because it does.
It makes a really huge difference.
And it allows us to see people who may not otherwise feel safe enough to talk about
faith, to talk about their jobs and their career path.
And yet to have this safe space with you, I think, has been really powerful for us to
all watch.
I receive that.
And thank you.
And you already know, like I said earlier, what you have done
and are doing and continue to do has been a blessing beyond what you can imagine.
So I appreciate your obedience and your sacrifice because girl.
What you give is it's just you're gangster with it. You're gangster with it. I appreciate that. I appreciate that.
You come, you're a giant in the spirit and and and you slay. So thank you.
Thank you. Okay. We got to help some of our girls out. They sent us a question and
only you can help me answer it. So this is hi, I'm from the Caribbean.
I've been listening to your podcast
and sermons for a while now,
and I'm thankful for having such a great woman
breathing life into my faith.
I've been a Christian for about four years now.
I decided that when I turned 19 years old,
for the most part, it's been really familiar for me.
I say familiar because from a very young age,
I've always been different.
I looked at the world differently, and I never really did what the world expected of me.
Some part of me knew there was more to life than what I was experiencing and I guess I
didn't realize then the call of God on my life.
But I'm just not sure where I am going or what I am doing honestly.
I know for a fact that I love God and I want to live my life glorifying him, but I just don't know what that looks like to be quite honest
I grew up singing and dancing for the most part out of the church and very recently in church
But I'm not really sure where to go from here. I haven't figured out my purpose in this life
I would really appreciate something advice on how to serve God properly in my youth and how to deal with the loneliness and
Uncertainty in this season. Thank you
and I love this because I feel like we've already like scratched the surface on it, but I
want to hear your take.
Well, one, serve. You got to serve. You got to start service. And like she said, how you
serve the Lord, you serve the people around you. You start in your home, you start with
your siblings, you start with your parents, your friends, whatever that may be, and your gifts and talents will make room for you.
So whatever you serve with, serve with your voice.
She's a singer, right?
So serve the community, serve the people around you.
And I don't think necessarily isolation is always bad.
I think there are seasons in our life where we need those moments of isolation and
Literally leaning in and getting the tools and the things that we need but when it becomes such a
Heavy weight that might not be of God and that you need to force yourself to let people know hey
I'm a little bit lonely like
Remove that pride and reach out to your friend have coffee have dinner whatever it may be
So I think it's first really identifying that season of loneliness
What is the idea of that? What what is the why of that? Is it is he calling you closer to him or is this a tactic of the enemy?
So that's kind of how I would see it and
Serve serve the people around
you with your gifts.
I love that. I think it goes back to what we really already said. You know, I think everyone's
looking for a you-made-it-moment, a you-made-it-sensiment. And I think at the end of the day as it relates
to faith, as it relates to being the person who God created you to be, the moment that you
came out of your mother's womb,
God was like, check, she made it.
He made it.
They're already there.
Like there was no achievement, there's no degree,
there's no promotion that God finally says,
now you've become who I had in mind.
God already gave you everything you needed
from the moment you took your first breath.
And so the only thing you have to do is walk it out.
And the only way you can walk it out is to be present in this moment.
Not wondering what I should be doing next year or where is this headed or
how is this going to work out.
But to come into each and every moment saying, you know what?
This moment is all that I have.
And if this moment is all that I have, what do I want to bring into it?
What spirit do I want to carry? What do I want to release, what do I want to bring into it? What spirit do I want to carry?
What do I want to release?
What do I want to refrain from saying
so that I can be authentic in this moment
and from that place of authenticity,
from that place of presence,
just trust that God's going to order
the next step.
And sometimes we want the full map.
We want ways to tell us,
if ways did not tell us exactly how we were going to get to our destination
We would uninstall the app because like child, where am I going?
Like which highway am I getting on? What's how many turns am I going to have to make? How long am I going to be on this road?
But imagine a world where the ways just gave you one direction at a time. That's what purpose is is
Staying in that one direction one moment one season one season, one job, one relationship, one
single moment at a time, and allowing and trusting that the next thing is going to be revealed.
That's good, that's it, that's it right there.
And not aborting it, you know, because we want to rush to the next, and we want to rush
to that grandiose thing, but not realizing in that moment we need that stuff. We need all of those things that we're learning those seeds that we're
planting. We need it all so like you said we don't need to rush because guess what
if we rush to it we're gonna board it we're gonna board it because we're not
gonna be able to handle it. You know what I mean? So yeah.
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It's so funny, someone asked me recently, like, how are you doing?
And I'm like, I'm exhausted.
Which I'm...
I am exhausted.
I am exhausted.
I am exhausted. Like, I'm not even that is a part of who I am at. I am exhausted.
Like, it's not even that is a part of who I am at this point.
I am exhausted.
And then I realized, like, part of the reason why I am exhausted is because I am carrying
next year's responsibilities in this moment.
I am exhausted because I am so consumed with what's going to be happening in six months,
what's happening a year from now that I literally don't have.
I do have enough energy for today, but because I feel like I need to be front loaded for
the next year, I'm exhausted because I already know that I'm going to run out of gas if all
I have is now.
But this morning I just felt my spirit like, girl, all you got is today.
That's all you got.
That's all you got.
That's it.
And if you can make it through today,
then maybe you can make it through tomorrow.
But let's not worry about having enough
for the next six years of your life
when all you have is this moment.
And so I'm trying, I still need a nap,
like I'm still exhausted.
But I think I would be less exhausted
if I wasn't trying to figure out every move
for the next year.
No, and that's honestly, I love that you said it because that's literally something
I had to work through in counseling last week because I realized that I'm like, wait a minute,
I'm not one with anxiety and like, anxiety literally exhausted.
Like as I start, I'm already exhausted and it's like, wait a minute, hold up.
I'm over here jumping to Friday.
I'm jumping to Saturday, playing out the week yet,
but take it moment by moment.
And for me, I was trying to control the future.
But then what's fake?
You know what I mean?
And I'm carrying stuff that I'm not even supposed
to be carrying anyways.
And to have the reason why I'm exhausted,
trying to figure out this, trying to figure out that,
and all that.
And all that is to let the Lord figure those things out,
that ain't on you. Because the math is not math thing. figure out that. And all of the others, let the Lord figure those things out, that ain't on you.
Because the math is not mathing, and you don't have all of the,
you don't have all of the equation figured out.
Like, y'all, you have a zero one part of it.
But y'all's got other things he's going to add to the equation.
Like the math isn't supposed to math right now.
Just be present.
God's going to add the other things.
I have to ask you, this is airing the week of Thanksgiving.
So in the spirit of Thanksgiving, in the spirit of Thanksgiving. So in the spirit of Thanksgiving,
in the spirit of being present,
in the spirit of not worrying,
what are you grateful for?
If this very season is very day,
this very moment in your life,
that you know is a direct connection
with your obedience to who you're supposed to be in God.
Honestly, my family, my wife, my husband, and my Jones,
I think for me, I feel like we've been able to have such
sweet moments together and just building as a family.
And I think too, not only that, just the family,
the synergy around that, but also just understanding, I think for me, I'm grateful
for clarity. I'm grateful for clarity. I feel like I'm getting a little bit more clear. Obviously,
we're never going to see the full picture we only see in part, right? But I think even the small
part that I do see has given me peace. So I'm grateful for clarity. That's so good. I think
So I'm grateful for clarity.
That's so good. I think this season of my life, I am grateful for
affirmation. I think that we've moved back to Dallas and I had a lot of experiences here, a lot of traumatic experiences, a lot of things that made me feel broken and unqualified.
And I think the further we get away from our trauma, the more
we try to diminish it or neutralize it and think maybe it wasn't that bad or maybe
I was being dramatic. But there has been something healing about me being back in Dallas
and allowing the little girl version of me to give the adult more healed perspective of who I am,
a tour of this city, a tour of my childhood, a tour of these relationship dynamics, a tour of
what it meant to be in church. When I was a little girl and I felt like the little girl and the woman
are walking together in a way that has been very healing and affirming for me.
So I'm grateful to know that I didn't make it up.
I'm grateful to know that I wasn't as messed up as I thought that I was, that maybe I was
just hurting, maybe I was lost, and I'm grateful to also feel found and empowered and confident
in spite of all of those things.
So I'm definitely grateful for this exhausting season.
Yeah.
Now, that's it.
And that's, you know, I had to shift my perspective on that as well.
It's like these are the things I've asked for.
So how are you stewing it well?
And I'm making sure that my attitude and my spirit is aligned with his and not working on, not
feeling like I'm complaining all the time.
And I'll really rejoice.
Rejoicing.
Like wait a minute, this is what I asked.
So I have to literally do like, okay Lord, so what part am I doing wrong?
Because this is what I asked for.
So for me, I completely get that.
And I understand that. I'm you know, I'm grateful.
I am grateful for why I'm exhausted.
Yeah.
That's right.
Yeah.
Because I've been exhausted and mad before.
So, do you hear me exhausted and irritated, but I'm just exhausted.
And that's a blessing within itself, because exhausted and having to cut somebody out,
that don't even, God don't even like that.
But now I can just be exhausted and take an app and be a better person.
And that's who he wants me to be.
Anyways, right.
So good.
Thank you Natalie.
I love you all of the work you do.
This feels like it needs to happen over sweat pans with no makeup on.
And maybe French fries, I don't know.
That's the energy it's giving. Yes, French fries and coconut and the pizza. I'm happy to have you with me. I'm happy to have you with me. I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me.
I'm happy to have you with me. I'm happy to have to use to my pleasure. All right. Take care. Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Natalie, your insight, your heart, your compassion,
your authenticity, it has truly blessed me.
And I know for sure I am not the only one.
So thank you, girl, for sliding on through.
Be in my co-host, but for also being on the other side of an interview for a change
Has really been something that I think may have stretched you. I don't know. I appreciate you allowing me to mind your business though
My hope for this episode is that it will inspire another woman to have faith in the thing that God has been highlighting
For them to do whether it's creating those boundaries,
whether it's starting that business,
just know it's gonna require faith,
but you are the woman for the job.
So get it started.
Join me next week.
We've got more conversations,
more incredible women who are out here evolving.
Don't miss it.
don't miss it. you