Woman Evolve with Sarah Jakes Roberts - Protecting Our Power w/ Nedra Glover Tawwab

Episode Date: May 15, 2024

Chhiiillleee, POWER is on the move! During the Houston leg of her book tour, SJR sat down with two-time New York Times Bestselling Author and Licensed Therapist, Nedra Glover Tawwab. These two chopped... it up about how to introduce authenticity into your environment, set boundaries, and bring more healthy people into your life. Sis, you know W.E. do ourselves a disservice when we create a boundary and then back away, right? W.E. get everybody can't go with you, but no need to act funny! If you're serious about honoring yourself in relationships and engaging in uncomfortable conversations, then this episode is for you. To learn more about how to protect your power, swing by ThePowerMovesBook.com!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, girlfriends. It's me, Carol Fisher, back with another season of the global number one podcast The Girlfriends. Last time we investigated the murder of Gail Katz. This time we're uncovering the identity of the woman who was buried in Gail's grave for a decade before she disappeared. Join me and the rest of the club as we tell her story. Listen to season two of The Girlfriends, Our Lost Sister on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Stephanie J. Block and I'm Mary Lee Fairbanks and we host Stages Podcast. Binge close to 100 episodes. Hear the inside stories from backstage and behind the scenes as we go beyond the resume and into the heart of creativity and what it really takes to be in the business of show business. Don't miss our chats with this season's Tony nominees. If you love
Starting point is 00:00:49 theater and entertainment, you are going to love Stages Podcast. Subscribe to Stages Podcast wherever you listen to your podcasts and visit us at stagespodcast.net. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine, hosted by me, Danielle Robay. And me, Simone Boyce. Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a
Starting point is 00:01:22 little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. When I meet people who say, I've never had an argument with my husband. Like, really? Y'all live together? So if everything is going well, something is not going well. It can be quite disastrous for an unhealthy dynamic when you start to make healthier choices.
Starting point is 00:01:55 Everybody can't go with you. What's up, family? This is your girl, Sarah Jakes Roberts. I am currently recording this from underneath my blanket. I am exhausted. Power has moved and moved and moved. I wanna thank you all so much for your love and your support as I have launched this book into the world.
Starting point is 00:02:16 I am so grateful to hear your feedback. You have no idea just how much it is affirming in me the vision for the book that God has given me. I cannot wait to get back to our regularly scheduled program to unpack with you all that I learned about myself, about God, about Tor, about launching a book. But for now, I want to share with you a conversation from the Power Moves Tour that really stood out in my mind. May is Mental Health Awareness Month and I have not had an opportunity to talk about how important it is that we take care of our mental health. I will say I am a huge advocate of mental and emotional wellness
Starting point is 00:02:58 and have personally benefited from how it changes our spiritual walk with God. I had an incredible conversation about us showing up in power, even as it relates to our family dynamics with Nedra Glover to Wab. I want to unpack the dynamic that our mental health has as it relates to our family and how many of us have felt powerless in changing the narrative of what's taking place in our family, or even just confronting what's happening in our families. I can't wait for you to hear this incredible conversation.
Starting point is 00:03:29 And next week, I'm back in there like swimwear. Okay, hold on to your bridges, your girl is back. It's funny that LaToya talked about protecting our power, because I have it broken up in segments and the next segment is literally protecting our power. And so once we get to a place where we are possessing our power, which was part of what was important to me in writing the book,
Starting point is 00:03:54 is I'd had a lot of people reach out to me, and they felt like I have my marching orders. I know what I'm supposed to do, but how do I introduce this power into my friendship circles, into my family? How do I begin to actually move in this power that I received? And so I want to read a portion from the book,
Starting point is 00:04:13 and then we're going to talk about protecting our power. This is in the chapter, The Ecosystem of You. And it says, you are right to assume that if you were to change, it would not just affect you, but would change the ecosystem in which you are connected. Out of consideration for the people who you presume would be adversely affected by your changing, you have stayed the same. And considering them, you have alienated you. This is not their fault.
Starting point is 00:04:48 This is your opportunity to examine this system that has made it easier to disappoint yourself rather than others. I don't use the word disappoint for dramatic flair. You may not consider it disappointment because you received some satisfaction in appeasing those around you. But the etymology of disappointment means to deprive of position. When you deprive yourself of a position of honesty and authenticity, you rob yourself of freedom.
Starting point is 00:05:22 I wanted to read that section of the book because oftentimes when we have received our power and we don't possess it because we are afraid that it cannot survive in the environment in which we exist, we end up living an inauthentic life. That means you know you should change, you know how you should be functioning, but you're afraid that it won't fit within the world in which you function. And so when I was putting together the programming for tonight and I was thinking about the theme, the power to disrupt your norm, I don't think that there is anyone who is more appropriate to talk about protecting our power than Nedra Glover-Tawaf.
Starting point is 00:05:59 She is a New York Times bestselling author of the book Boundaries, and she's also the New York Times bestselling author of the book Drama Free, which is all about protecting our power and the dynamics of our family. And so could you all please help me welcome to the Power Moves Tour Nedra Glover-Tawab for our conversation. I've already completely fan-grilled in the back, but I want to know from your perspective when you hear about protecting our power, what immediately comes to mind to you? Of course, boundaries. I think of how we can honor ourselves
Starting point is 00:06:48 and our relationships with others. Sometimes, you know, I heard you talking to Latoya, and one of the things that really stood out is this idea that we don't have the power, and it's always there. It's just been quieted. It's been pushed down. It has been masked
Starting point is 00:07:09 so we can fit into different spaces. But it's really important for us to consider ourselves because it's already there. We're not rediscovering it. We're just doing what we feel. Why do you think it's so easier for us to not consider ourselves? There's so much teaching that goes into talking us out of being ourselves.
Starting point is 00:07:39 When you go to school, when you're in your family, when you're with your friends, why do you want to do that? Why do you want to wear that? No, you have to sit this way. You have to do this thing. To the point that we start to feel like, maybe I shouldn't be me. Maybe I should start to do these other things.
Starting point is 00:07:58 Maybe I'm really not an introvert. Maybe I'm really, you know, we start to second guess ourselves. A few months ago, I was reading a story in the newspaper and it was about a guy saying how his wife doesn't really know herself because when they go out to eat, she's like, I'm so adventurous. And he's like, actually, you're not. You eat the same thing every time, but you order something different and send it back.
Starting point is 00:08:31 But she wants to be adventurous, because people say, oh, you should be adventurous. And so she's like, I'm adventurous. He's like, you're not. And it's okay not to be. It's okay to always get Cajun chicken pasta. And we have to own that about ourselves. But I think there's so much around I should be this thing. And I don't think social media makes it better because now we have imagery to go along with
Starting point is 00:09:02 who we should be. We have a storyline. And we're not considering the backstory of that. So now we have a lot more outside of our family, our friends, and all these ecosystems we're in. Now we get a lot of pictures from strangers telling us who we should be. Okay. So if somebody's in this room and they're like, okay, I am ready to start owning who I am, being honest about that, but the people I'm in relationship with are used to a different
Starting point is 00:09:31 version of myself. And I don't want to just like flip the script on them, which is why I haven't said anything. Where do we even start with introducing our authenticity in the space where we have been applauded for pretending? I would take those words you said and remix them, right? So sometimes we think we have to get really crafty with what we say to other people, like there's a perfect way to say it. And it's really not.
Starting point is 00:10:03 You can say what you just said. So I will be trying something new. I'm trying to own my power. And you might see me advocating for myself a bit more. So when we go out to eat, I might order first. When you ask me if I want to do this thing, I will actually speak up in this instance. You can let people know that this is a new thing that you'll be seeing. You know, it's not like we have to give them an explanation and this is why I'm changing, but we may want to let them know you will see
Starting point is 00:10:38 something different and this is what that might look like. Hey, girlfriends, it's me, Carol Fisher. I'm so excited to tell you about the brand new series of The Girlfriends. In season one, we told you about the murder of Gail Katz at the hands of my ex-boyfriend Bob. At one point, a woman's torso washed up on Staten Island and was misidentified as Gail. She spent nine years in Gail's grave, and then she just disappeared.
Starting point is 00:11:09 It's almost like it's become this moral obligation to find her. And that's what we're going to do, find this missing girlfriend and tell her story with the help of some of your favorite girlfriends from season one, like my producer, Anna. Oh my god. My friend Dr. Mindy Shapiro.
Starting point is 00:11:27 Hi, it's Dr. Shapiro and I'd like to speak with the deputy medical examiner. And of course, Gail's sister Elaine Katz. Having no closure, it kills you. Join us as we try to solve a 35 year old cold case It's not going to be easy, but it's going to be one hell of a ride What I can't believe this Listen to season 2 of the girlfriends our lost sister on the I heart radio app Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts I used to have so many men ever you get your podcasts. She's got all of these Maseratis and Bentley's all in the driveway. Is it like a mansion?
Starting point is 00:12:25 Yes, it's a mansion. That this queen of the con uses to scam some of the biggest names in professional sports out of untold fortunes. About six million. Approximately 11 million dollars. Nearly 10 million dollars was all gone. Employing whatever means necessary to bleed her victims dry. She would probably have sex with one of her clients.
Starting point is 00:12:50 Hide your money in your old rich men because she is on the prowl. Listen to Queen of the Con, Season 5, The Athlete Whisperer on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Elliot Conney and this is Family Therapy. In my best hopes, I guess identify the life that I want and work towards it. I've never seen a man take care of my mother the way she needed to be taken care of. I get the impression that you don't feel like you've done everything right as a father. Is that true?
Starting point is 00:13:28 That's true and I'm not offended by that. Thank you for going through those things and thank you for overcoming them. Wow. Thank God for deliverance. Every time I have one of our sessions, our sessions be positive. It just keeps me going. I feel like my focus is redirected in a different aspect of my life now. So how'd we do today?
Starting point is 00:13:48 We did good. The Black Effect presents Family Therapy. Listen now on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. I want to say that in my spirit. But like, okay, how about this? This is a question. This is a question. You ready for it?
Starting point is 00:14:22 Here's the question. I'm ready. How do we say that without being talked out of it by the very people who we're going to share it with? This is a question, this is a question. You ready for it? Here's the question. I'm ready. I'm ready. How do we say that without being talked out of it by the very people who we're going to share it with? Like, how do we not make this a debate, but rather a declaration? I'm going to go back to, I don't want you to talk me out of it. I don't want you to talk me out of it. I'm going to say something that's going to be new and different for our relationship.
Starting point is 00:14:50 You may see me doing some new things. Please allow me to do that. So all those things we're thinking that we shouldn't say, that we can't say, we got to find the perfect words, we need to say the thing. It's like when you're doing a speech, a lot of times, if you look up information, how do you do a speech? One of the recommended things to do if you're nervous is to start with that.
Starting point is 00:15:13 Hey everyone, I'm nervous. So when we talk to people, we can let them know, this is really hard for me. This is really difficult to say this. I might mess up sometime and slip back into this old behavior, but I am trying to do this new thing. You want them to be in it with you, to help you be accountable, so you have to let them know what's going on.
Starting point is 00:15:41 Now I will say, some people really enjoy the messy parts of you and it can be quite disastrous for an unhealthy dynamic when you start to make healthier choices. You got to say more than that. You can't just say that and stop talking. You need to unpack that. Everybody can't go with you. There are times when we need to allow ourselves to just have fond memories of an experience. Right? to just have fond memories of an experience. Ooh. Right, like, aw, they was so nice in 2020. Don't take them to 2025. That was, it was wonderful.
Starting point is 00:16:35 It's like your prime dress. Like, you just want to look at that picture like that was a day. You don't want that dress now. And so allow yourself to miss people, to think about those stories of them, but everybody is not supposed to be in every season with you. And it's, you know, I feel like there is this theme around like cut them off. And it's like, well, we don't want to cut everybody off. Some people need a pause. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:06 Some people need to be returned to at a later time. It's not like, oh, I have to send them this message and let them know we're done. It could be, I don't call them every week. Yeah. I cut back and that cuts it back. Or I change the way that I show up with them. There are often times that we feel like people are not letting us change. This person is
Starting point is 00:17:32 not going to allow me to have a voice. Have you tried? Right, right. What have you tried in that situation? Because how have they not allowed it? A lot of times I don't hear pushback, I hear fear. Yeah. So, just to give you all biblical context, because in one of the chapters of the book I talk about this and in Luke 2 when Jesus is in Jerusalem and Mary and Joseph have to go back and find him, he finally is found after three days and they walk up to him and
Starting point is 00:18:04 they're looking for him. They're like, where have you been? And Jesus says to them, didn't you know I'd be about my father's business? What he's doing in that moment is letting them know, though you are having one experience of me, it is not the full experience of who I am. And Luke 2 ends by saying that Mary treasured these things in her heart because when someone shows you who they are and you have the capacity to be with them, then it expands the way that you see them.
Starting point is 00:18:31 So if someone is not able to expand the way that they see you when you present all of who you are, then maybe they do need that pause that you're talking about. I have a take here. Or maybe we need more people. Sometimes we're trying to pick one person to be all the things. It could be our partner. He has to like movies. Not just movies, but rom-coms with Julia Roberts.
Starting point is 00:18:59 He has to love those. He has to do this. He has to do that. And it's like, it sounds like you need a friend. It sounds like you need to hang out with your mama more. Like, you may need some other people. So sometimes it's not that we can't be all of ourselves. It's like we're trying to get someone to be all of everything.
Starting point is 00:19:21 Wow. Can we talk about the loneliness that people fear will occur if they start to step in their power and then they are alienated? This idea that everyone can't go with you, it sounds good until it's Friday night and everybody's going somewhere. And I wish I could go with you, but because I said you couldn't go with me, now I got to go home. Well, we might need to do a little plus minus, right?
Starting point is 00:19:52 Like when you add, you subtract. So you may want to hang on to your yoga pal until you can find somebody else. You know, just, oh, and here's a new person in the class that I can lean on. You know, so sometimes you need to bring people in. We may get into the habit of just excluding, just Xing out, Xing out, and we haven't added anyone. We haven't invited new people into our lives. So that is problematic. That's what brings on that loneliness because we don't have new people to share things with. We haven't tapped into the people who are already there who could feel some of these roles. I hear this often when people have dysfunctional families. They're like, oh my gosh, I don't have a mom. But what about the neighbor who
Starting point is 00:20:40 bakes cakes for you? It's giving nurturing. I mean, it's not giving birth, but it's giving nurturing. Okay? There is some mother in that pound cake. So sometimes we will exclude people because it is not family, because it's not this exact person that we want. But there are other people around who can hop in and feel some of that void. Speaking of family, what if the people who don't respect the boundaries or who we fear won't respect the boundaries are family. And the idea of they can't go with you is even more challenging when in many instances
Starting point is 00:21:30 maybe they are all you've ever known or that means that Christmas and Thanksgiving is going to be different. Like it's one thing to walk away from a friend or to say I'm going to create distance between a friend. But in family units often if there is friction or a need to have a boundary, it affects the way that you connect with everyone. And now all of a sudden, maybe you're the one acting funny or now you think you're better than everyone else.
Starting point is 00:21:58 How do we navigate that reality? Well first we must acknowledge when we actually are acting funny. Because many of us do set a boundary and back away. You can set a boundary and continue to engage. Hey, we're not having Thanksgiving at my house. Call your mama tomorrow. Nobody said don't call her. But sometimes we do that.
Starting point is 00:22:22 We're like, oh, I set this boundary, They're mad at me. Well, do we know? We've had this hard conversation. We don't need to do this thing next week. Was it canceled? So it's really important to think about, am I the person who's changed my behavior in this situation or have they even reacted to it yet? So that's number one. Now let's say that they're changing their behavior, they're doing something different. Talk about it. Hey, I notice after I mentioned this thing about not exchanging gifts with 25 people, you didn't call me like you typically do when you get out of church on Sunday.
Starting point is 00:23:08 Is everything okay? So just notice what's happening. Most people when they're called out, most healthy people, they will say, oh. Okay. All right. Yeah. Most healthy people, they'll be willing to talk about it. And for those unhealthy ones, they will be uncomfortable that you even brought that to them. So at least they'll pretend to not have a problem.
Starting point is 00:23:33 Right? They're like, what? No, I was just about to call you. That's good enough. That's good enough. They've noticed that you know what's happening. So in families, in any, you know, really any type of relationship, we have to make it a part of the relationship to have uncomfortable conversations. Because many of us believe that the best relationships are the ones that are conflict free.
Starting point is 00:24:02 That's not true. When I meet people who say, I've never had an argument with my husband, are the ones that are conflict free. That's not true. When I meet people who say, I've never had an argument with my husband. I'm like, really? Y'all live together? In the same house? I'm like, I think you need an argument once a week
Starting point is 00:24:18 about something. Maybe not a big blow up, but we should disagree about something. So if everything is going well, something is not going well. Someone's needs are not being met, and then that's when we get resentment, we start to get passive aggressive behavior.
Starting point is 00:24:40 So if you are the person who's noticing like these boundary issues in your family, be the after-school special. Sit everybody down and have a family meeting. Be the person who, you know, just has these awkward conversations. You're the person who notices it. Yeah. We may not need to wait on the elders because some of us are looking to auntie, uncle, grandparent, like, well, they older, so they should do it. Well, I have the knowledge.
Starting point is 00:25:09 Yeah. I have the desire. And so it's a conversation that I will start. Hey, girlfriends. It's me, Carol Fisher. I'm so excited to tell you about the brand new series of The Girlfriends. In season one, we told you about the murder of Gail Katz at the hands of my ex-boyfriend Bob.
Starting point is 00:25:31 At one point, a woman's torso washed up on Staten Island and was misidentified as Gail. She spent nine years in Gail's grave, and then she just disappeared. It's almost like it's become this moral obligation to find her. And that's what we're going to do, find this missing girlfriend and tell her story. With the help of some of your favorite girlfriends from season one, like my producer Anna. Oh my god. My friend Dr. Mindy Shapiro. Hi it's Dr. Shapiro and I'd like to speak with the deputy medical examiner. And of course, Gail's sister, Elaine Katz.
Starting point is 00:26:10 Having no closure, it kills you. Join us as we try to solve a 35-year-old cold case. It's not going to be easy, but it's going to be one hell of a ride. What? I can't believe this. Listen to season two of The Girlfriends, Our Lost Sister on the iHeartRadio app, Apple of hip hop with the Gangsta Chronicles, a podcast that aims to unravel the intricate tapestry of one of music's most influential and misunderstood subgenres, Gangsta Rap. Hosted by MC Yade and Big Steels every Thursday, each episode provides an in-depth exploration
Starting point is 00:26:57 into the formative artists, monumental albums, and socio-political factors that have shaped Gangsta Rap from its emergence in the 80s to its enduring impact today. Gangsta Chronicles impacts the evolution of this uniquely American art form. We dive into the socio-cultural aspects that gangsta rap boldly addressed, from police brutality to systemic racism, offering listeners a comprehensive understanding
Starting point is 00:27:20 of the profound cultural significance this genre holds. Listen to the Gangsta Chronicles on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, or wherever you get your podcasts. Let's go. I'm Tamika D. Mallory. And it's your boy, Mike Saunders General. And we are your host of TMI,
Starting point is 00:27:40 New Year, New Name, New Energy, but. Same old us. Oh, yeah. New year, new name, new energy, but same old. And catch us every Wednesday on the Black Effect Network, breaking down social and civil rights issues, pop culture and politics in hopes of pushing our culture forward to make the world a better place for generations to come. But that's not all. We will also have special guests to add their thoughts on the topics, as well as break down different political issues with local activists
Starting point is 00:28:11 in their community. If you like to be informed and to expand your thoughts, listen to TMI on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. That's right. Okay, so Power Moves, the whole premise of the book is not just about doing something. It's also about the fluidity of power. And I want to talk about mental health really quickly. And I want to talk about this idea of being the strong friend, and how oftentimes we have allowed power to mean that we show up for everyone all of the time, and how while
Starting point is 00:28:53 that could be possibly power in one season because power moves, power in another season could be saying no, it could be saying I need rest. Can we talk about the fluidity of power as it relates to our mental health, getting the help that we need, the support that we need, and being able to no longer feel loyal to a version of ourself that we no longer have the capacity to be? Well, I think the best way for the strong friend, the strong person to tap into their power is to accept help. That's the biggest challenge I see.
Starting point is 00:29:32 It's not the saying, no, it's not, oh, I have too much going on. It's not those things. It's that people have no clue that they're suffering. It's that when people are offering to assist them, that's what they're rejecting. They're good with rejecting the invite, but they are not as great with saying, actually, I do need some help. I'm having a hard time. This is a difficult moment for me. And one of the ways that we can inject that
Starting point is 00:30:06 into our friendships is to be the person to do it. A few weeks ago, I still don't know what was going on with me, but something was going on. I was in a major funk, and a friend called me, and she said, how are you today? I said, girl, not good, I'm funky. And she said, why? I said, I don't know, I'm funky. And she said, why?
Starting point is 00:30:25 I said, I don't know, I'm working through something. I figured out I just took a vitamin D. Hopefully that give me a boost. Maybe my vitamin D low. I don't know. But I'm just not in a good mood. I just, you know, I was just teary and, you know, it just wasn't a good day.
Starting point is 00:30:41 About a week later, she said, you know, I am so happy you told me that because I am going through something and I was hesitant to share it. And she talked about, you know, her situation and I thought, oh, you know, look at me opening doors. Just being honest when someone says, how are you doing? That simple act of I'm actually not in a good mood. We can still talk about whatever we're gonna talk about, but I just want you to know, I'm just kinda low energy today,
Starting point is 00:31:15 but what did you see on TV? What was it? So being honest about that invites people to speak more freely about what they're going through. And if you have a particularly strong person in your life, you may have to force help on them. Because we know that a person needs help when they're going through a divorce.
Starting point is 00:31:41 We know that someone needs help when they've just had a baby. We know that someone needs help when they've just had a baby. We know that people need support when they've lost a parent. They may not be able to tell you what that is, but it's something you can do. Nedra Glover-Tawab, ladies and gentlemen. So, we've talked about possessing our power, we've talked about protecting our power, presenting our power, polishing our power. I want to close the evening talking about partnering with power. And there's a woman in the Bible in John 4, this is the woman at the well, who has an encounter that allows her to partner with power in a way that she didn't anticipate. And I love this text so much because what we see is that this woman in partnering
Starting point is 00:32:45 with power becomes a force to be reckoned with. She goes from being someone who was perhaps hiding in the background, who was avoiding interactions with people, who was thinking that she was better left unseen to someone who drops
Starting point is 00:33:00 her rhythm, drops out of the way that she was functioning and literally goes and tells someone about this encounter she's had with Jesus. I feel like this is an important message for you all to have as we begin to talk about power moving. Because there's no way that you can have a divine encounter with God and stay the same. There's no way that you have a divine encounter with God and stay stagnant. And part of the reason why God goes out of his way
Starting point is 00:33:28 to make sure that we have encounters with Jesus, to go out of his way to make sure that we have a revelation of how he sees us is because he recognizes the harvest of an encounter is your movement. The harvest of a divine encounter with God is your obedience, it's your response. It's the way that you change the way that you were before. It's the way that you change the way that you speak. And God told me that part of my mandate in having this tour, part of my mandate in writing
Starting point is 00:33:59 this book was to get you to open your eyes to the possibilities that these random encounters that you have been having is actually God trying to get you to tap into a power that you didn't know existed. This woman at the well is seemingly having a divine encounter, but it seems random to her. And there are so many things happening in our life and in our world that come off as random, but little do we know that it is
Starting point is 00:34:30 an opportunity for us to engage in a power inside of us that we did not even know existed. If I had time, I would break down this whole story, but for those of you unfamiliar, Jesus is traveling with his disciples when he says,
Starting point is 00:34:45 I need to go into Samaria. And he says he needs to go into Samaria because he has an appointment with a woman who thinks she's going to have a random encounter. Can we rest in that for a minute?
Starting point is 00:35:00 Because sometimes what we're calling random is actually a divine encounter in disguise. Sometimes what we're calling random is actually a divine encounter in disguise. Sometimes what we're calling random is actually a divine appointment by God in disguise. And because we are so used to random things wasting our times, and random things just coming up in our life,
Starting point is 00:35:20 we are not sensitive enough to understand that what I'm calling random is actually a divine opportunity meant to stir up the gift of God that's down on the inside of me. But I am so grateful that even when we call it random, that God doesn't give up. He keeps putting it in front of our face. He keeps putting this opportunity in front of us because he recognizes that if you step into this divine encounter that you are going to begin functioning differently. God is so committed to who this woman could become that he goes out of his way to have
Starting point is 00:35:55 a divine encounter with her and he doesn't even give up on her when all of the other powers start showing up in the way that she responds to him. The reason why I wrote this book is because I wanted us to recognize that though we have power from God, the power that we have from God is also battling with the power of our shame, the power of our past, the power of our rejection. And when God gets ready to take us from a place of feeling
Starting point is 00:36:26 shame and afraid and hiding, he often allows an encounter that will break the seal open on the power that he placed inside of us. That scripture that I quoted earlier, that God hasn't given us the spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind, right before that scripture, Paul tells Timothy, you've gotta stir up the gift of God on the inside of you.
Starting point is 00:36:48 You know why you have to stir up the gift of God on the inside of you? Because sometimes the gift of God inside of you settles on the bottom. And if you don't stir up the gift of God, you'll be pulling from trauma, pulling from pain, pulling from your past. But if you stir up the gift of God
Starting point is 00:37:04 that's on the inside of you, now you're gonna be pulling from the, pulling from your past. But if you stir up the gift of God that's on the inside of you, now you're gonna be pulling from the gift of God. That's why sometimes I can't just have a conversation with someone until I stir up the gift of God. Sometimes I can't just sit down to write a book until I stir up the gift of God because I'm at a season in my life where I don't wanna give you the gift of my pain.
Starting point is 00:37:22 I don't wanna give you the gift of my past. I don't wanna give you the gift of my trauma. I wanna give you the gift of my pain. I don't want to give you the gift of my past. I don't want to give you the gift of my trauma. I want to give you the gift of God that's down on the inside of me. And Houston, I want you to understand that God put a gift on the inside of you. God did not just have you on this earth to randomly have experiences.
Starting point is 00:37:40 God put a gift on the inside of you that he says, if you would release this gift in the earth, then your family would be says, if you would release this gift in the earth, then your family would be changed. If you would release this gift in the earth, then your community would be changed. If you would release this gift in the earth, then demons would start trembling. If you release this gift in the earth,
Starting point is 00:37:57 then generational curses would be broken. If you release this gift in the earth, you'll look at your life and wonder, how did I end up right here? And God says all you did was start stirring it up, stirring it up, stirring it up. And I came here to stir up the gift of God that's down on the inside of you. I wanted you to have tools. I wanted you to have wisdom. But I knew the night could not end until we had an opportunity to stir up the gift of God that's down on the inside of you
Starting point is 00:38:25 because it's not gonna be by might and it's not gonna be by your power, but it's gonna be by the Spirit that you do anything in the earth that is ever going to reflect change. And I came here to let somebody know that it is time for you to start moving in power. I've seen you moving in fear.
Starting point is 00:38:43 I've seen you moving in shame. I've seen you moving in shame. I've seen you moving in rejection. But I hear God saying it's time for you to start moving in power. And when you get ready to start moving in power, all of heaven's resources are going to back you up. And I came here to let you know that you may not be ready to move in power, but for some reason God has you in Houston, Texas on a Thursday night for a divine encounter. The woman at the well was not ready to bust a move,
Starting point is 00:39:16 but sometimes you need God to put you in a situation where you have no choice but to bust a move. So I want to rebuke the spirit of fear. So I want to rebuke the spirit of fear. And I want to rebuke the spirit of stuck that has been keeping you from busting a move. And I came here to let you know that if you don't bust a move, then the family may not be saved. If you don't bust a move, then the generation may not be saved.
Starting point is 00:39:42 But if you mess around and stir up the gift of God that's on the inside of you, if you stir up the gift of God that's on the inside of you, God says then you will be a force to be reckoned with. I was not playing when I wrote this book. Power moves is about igniting your confidence so that you can become a force. You were not meant to be in the background. You are here to establish the kingdom of heaven. We are not waiting to get to glory.
Starting point is 00:40:15 We are waiting to release glory on earth until he calls us home. There's glory on the inside of you. I know you've got pain. I know you've got trauma, but there's glory on the inside of you. I know you've got pain. I know you've got trauma, but there's glory on the inside of you, Evolve. Hey girlfriends, it's me, Carol Fischer, back with another season of the global number one podcast, The Girlfriends. Last time we investigated the murder of Gail Katz.
Starting point is 00:40:50 This time we're uncovering the identity of the woman who was buried in Gail's grave for a decade before she disappeared. Join me and the rest of the club as we tell her story. Listen to season two of The Girlfriends, our lost Sister on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Stephanie J. Block and I'm Mary Lee Fairbanks. And we host Stages Podcast. Binge close to 100 episodes. Hear the inside stories from backstage and behind the scenes as we go beyond the resume and into the heart of creativity and what it really takes to be in the business of show business. Don't miss our chats with this season's Tony nominees. If you love
Starting point is 00:41:28 theater and entertainment, you are going to love Stages Podcast. Subscribe to Stages Podcast wherever you listen to your podcasts and visit us at stagespodcast.net. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine, hosted by me, Danielle Robay. And me, Simone Boyce. Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart.
Starting point is 00:42:07 Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side.

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