Wonderful! - Ep. 44: BoxBlaster11

Episode Date: November 3, 2016

It's Hometowns time! Canadian Hometowns are just like our American Hometowns, as it turns out, except the families are extra polite, and also there's only three of them. Come here us rank these folks' actual human families, and discuss the merits of a new, surprisingly educational YouTube channel. MaxFunDrive ends on March 29, 2024! Support our show now by becoming a member at maximumfun.org/join.

Maybe you should go and do some contemplating. Right reasons, right reasons, being a good girl for all the right reasons. Right reasons, right reasons, being a good girl for all the right reasons. I'm the best new rep and I'm rapping to your poolside. Here to find true love, one man for all the right reasons. Hi, I'm Rachel McElroy. Hi, I'm Griffin McElroy. Hey, I'm Jeff McElroy.

Hi, I'm Susan McElroy. Hey, I'm Taylor McElroy. Hey, I'm Jeff McElroy. Hi, I'm Susan McElroy. Hey, I'm Taylor McElroy. What you don't see right now is that Griffin has a series of ventriloquist dummies. He's given Jeff Dunham a real run for his money. You gotta say the next part. This is Rose Buddies. Because it's hometowns, people, and this is our family. Jeff, Taylor, Susan. I think I said Nicole.

Griffin, everyone that listens to this show knows who your family is. They don't know about my Texas family. Watch Friday Night Lights sometime. You'll learn. When you live in Texas, they assign you a state-exclusive family. That's right. Taylor, I love you, Taylor. You're my Texas brother. Rachel, you seem quiet tonight.

That's Susan talking to you now. Say something to Susan. You're being so rude. People are going to ask me when I knew Griffin was falling apart, and I'm going gonna play this episode back oh you think this is it this is it right here this is the moment uh-huh i yeah listen we're all under a lot of duress right do you feel a lot of pressure when we start episodes to like come in with like some no dude i just let it i just let it fucking. That's the way to do it. That's right.

I was in an improv troupe for 16 years. I forget which one that was. See, the secret is you're supposed to say yes and. So, like, I thought you might. Hey, who's that family member you got sitting over there? I don't know that I've met that particular Texas member of our family before. Who is that, Rachel? Say their name and their voice now.

This is Julie Taylor. Okay, well, Rachel? Say their name and their voice now. This is Julie Taylor. Okay, well now you're just doing a Friday Night Lights character, which we can do that. We can turn this into... We can roleplay this shit. Now, Riggins, cut it out. Wait. Coach Eric Taylor. Oh, that's a terrible Eric Taylor.

Come on. Let me hear your fucking Eric Taylor then, Master Impression Smith. Mine didn't claim to claim to be one okay you're just ragging on me your julie taylor was perfect it was perfect yes um this is rose buddies it's a podcast where we talk well it's a podcast where we don't support each other um but it's also when we're not um not supporting each other uh comedically we also talk about the bachelor bachelor family of products like the bachelorette canada uh and we are into the final stretch folks and i think i'm feeling a little bit punchy because we just watched the hometowns episode and it had the dumbest ending like the dumbest last 45 seconds imaginable yeah that was

real weird uh but we'll we'll get to that. Otherwise, good episode. Good Hometowns. We're kind of in the meat and the potatoes, you know? Kind of making the sausage now. We're making the meat and potato sausage. I've talked about this before, but I love Hometowns. It's like one of my favorite things about this whole franchise. So I was really looking forward to tonight.

Yes. And I wouldn't say that I was disappointed. No, I think it was not. I mean, one of the hometowns, this is always the case. There's always an outlier, right? Like one of the hometowns was lit. Like one of these moms mommed so fucking hard. I was like losing it.

But usually at hometowns, have four fans this time there's only three and so we didn't get the wide poopoo platter the wide cornucopia of of delights um we got three fairly straightforward hometown dates although i will say the date parts of it were like some of the best date parts we've ever seen it was no there were there was no like i want to take you to my old high school football stadium and then you're going to sit perfectly fucking still. Well,

we did go to a football field though. I take it back. We did actually do literally that. Well, never mind. And drive around

the hometown. I think I was just so enamored by Mikkel's. So let's start there because he was number one up at the plate. Oh, Mikkel. I leaned over to Rachel

and I explained, I am now shipping Mikkel and Jasmine harder than I have ever shipped two characters, fictional or reality. Harder than Emily and Jeff with one F? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wow.

Yeah. I know. I'm fucking tender right now. I was like, I've- Clink, clink, clink. That was the sound of my armor falling to the floor. I'm naked right now. And I'm ready.

Please be gentle. Are you talking to me or Mikkel? Whichever one. Whichever one. Or Jasmine. Oh, whoever you want it to have been said for. So we are in Mikkel's hometown of Newmarket, Ontario. And

he is meeting Jasmine in a park and he shows up on a motorcycle. This is good. This is a fantasy I didn't know I had. Yeah. Didn't know Mikkel was a leather daddy. But here he comes on that hog and Jasmine's feeling it. And I don't know that much about, do you know that much about hog life?

I don't. I thought I did. Because I grew up in West Virginia. I feel like there's a lot of hog life there. Yeah, did you know somebody with a hog? Our friend Jason, you know Jason. Yeah. He leased a motor scooter that he never made any payments on,

so they did repossess it. But for a while there, he let us all drive around on it. One time Justin drove so slow on it that he fell over, and it was the hardest I've maybe ever laughed in my whole life because he was screaming the night rider theme song i've mentioned this probably on every podcast i've ever done it is such a imagine justin going 0.05 miles an hour and just slowly toppling over while screaming the night rider thing yeah it's wonderful shit yeah um so that's about as close to hog life as i ever got i think i've probably been i you know i've been on atvs and shit i don't know i've ever been on like a hog a hog journey

i have not actually either seems unsafe well yeah for sure i know there's probably some hog hog lovers out there who like no dude no um that's fine no no no shade uh but i it's not i don't think it's the life for me but mikhail is working it but i was saying i don't think i know that much about hog life because he makes such a big deal out of like i've never let another person on the back of my beautiful hog yeah and not just i've never let but i've never wanted another person i've never even wanted a hog buddy yeah but here you are straddling me betwixt my hog. And I love you. Like, I've never felt this way about somebody to share my hog.

Yeah, it kind of went against type for Mikkel. Because I think we always got the sense that Mikkel, if he was going to transport himself somewhere. Helicopter. Helicopter, one. Or like a sensible, fuel-efficient, like, like you know four-door sedan a fiat a ford fiesta something like that a kia soul he seems like a kia soul driver right the big cube cube shape boys sure but i see him pull up on this hog and i'm like leather daddy mikhail i didn't know but now i know and she knows and he knows because he pull up on this hog and I'm like, leather daddy, Mikkel, I didn't know. But now I know. And she knows and he knows because he wants her on this hog all day.

Yeah, she's real into it. They're both wearing leather jackets and it's real cute. He says, I think she looks sexy as fuck in that leather jacket and they beep it out. He says something with a swear in it. Maybe he says she looks fucking sexy in a leather jacket. It's like these two the heat the passion yeah they do a lot of smooching do a lot of smooching she says i just want to hug him and smooch his face all over these two i think you know the term hog wild

i think it is derived from this i think it's a real thing uh so they go to a drive-in which is apparently a very significant drive-in to mikhail it's where he goes to think uh and it's been a big place for him his whole life he delivers this fact in like such an earnest way that i just adored really explained like he'd like sneak out of his parents house he explained like when i was younger there was so much pressure on me like to be something and he i feel like he talked about this earlier because he said like his sister's a doctor and like there was a lot of uh like pressure on him when he was younger and so he says like whenever it would get too much i would just sneak out at night and i would push my car down the driveway and come to the drive-in movie theater it's like wow that is the most like

well i mean it's like the most 1950s thing ever but like it's yeah it's very very endearing yeah we should go back we haven't been to the drive-in in forever we have not there's a drive-in here in austin that is fucking great well it's been too hot to want to sit it's been so hot forever yeah in your car yeah which we should point out motorcycle in a drive-in is a weird... They had a picnic table with champagne set up for him. And he was the only one of three boys that didn't make a champagne oopsie. So, well done, I guess. Well, that we saw on camera. There definitely was champagne in the shot.

No, yes. I'm saying he didn't spill champagne on himself, which was commendable. But, like, yeah, I think you bring a car to a drive in right so you can get in the back and just like neck well to be fair there was no movie being shown that's also like it was not business hours what could they have shown what could they have shown oh a w network original yes what is it what would the w network original that they were going to show is going to be like love Love It or List It. Oh, okay. Right?

I thought you were going to think of like a Canadian-based Lifetime drama. Oh. Yeah. Like on the rink of love, but it's like a hockey rink. That's pretty good. It's not. And so they sit there and they talk. And Mikkel has told us that he's in love with her and wants to tell her.

And it kind of seems like he's going to chicken out. But then they're getting ready to go and she's back on the bike. And then he decides to tell her. You can't not see Jasmine on that bike, on that beautiful metal machine and not say the damn thing. Yeah. on that beautiful metal machine and not say the damn thing. Yeah. So he says that he's in love with her.

I didn't write down the exact words. I don't think he did it the bad way, which is to say I am in love. I am falling in love with you. Yeah. Did he say falling or did he say just in love? Gosh, I wish I'd take better notes. Because we decided while we were watching, falling in love with you yeah did he say falling or he say just in love gosh i can't remember better notes if we because we we decided while we're watching like we need to talk about on the podcast the semantic distinction and it sounds so silly but i honest to god feel like for

deciphering this show it is so important the gulf between i'm falling in love with you and i'm in love with you here's the thing i totally get it it because you know that she's not going to say it back. Right. And there's something hedging your bets a little about saying I'm falling in love with you. The fewer, the less wiggle room you allow in that statement, I feel like the more easy it is to predict that that person's going to be the winner. The person with the fewer deflections, and by deflections, I mean I am in love with you. Saying it like that is crazy. I am in love with you. And saying I'm falling in love with you is like an action which

is to say like it is not complete yet but it will get there and again this sounds so stupid but like when you're talking about this show and you're talking about like who's quote unquote winning this show if you want to try and figure out who is doing that like i feel like this is an important it's an important distinction so the people were just like i'm in love with you that's the that's i don't know that's true though right because some people play it kind of cool yeah and at that point the bachelor bachelorette is so desperate for the affirmation that getting the i'm falling in love with you is sometimes like just enough and like maybe early on but not this not we're in final three territory um and mike doesn't say it until like the end of the episode i i don't i i get what you're saying but like it's i mostly

just wanted to point out like there are so many wonderful ways to say you're in love with somebody and this show has introduced all of them to us and yeah i am because i i point this out because jasmine then says in a like behind the scenes interview she says i am falling in love with mikhail and it's like oh you did two deflections there um which is like still though for the bachelor bachelorette to say anything is like crazy um although not in the last two seasons of the show where it's just like everybody tells everybody they're in love with each other non-stop and it's just like the words don't fucking mean anything it's just quick drama girl how many people can you say i love you too how quickly is bachelorette canada shorter or does it just feel shorter it is uh one hour six minutes without

commercials no i mean the length of time oh i mean the number of episodes is certainly shorter yeah like there's something to me that's like a little more reasonable if you cut three or four weeks out which just seems like that's what they do then i'm falling in that is fair yeah if i mean on a season of bachelor bachelorette we'd be at like probably final eight maybe six at this point and that is probably around the time where people start saying it that's a good point I didn't even think about that. Yeah. I just like, I don't know how long it's been. I think we've had eight episodes now.

Yeah. This is the eighth episode. Yeah. So I don't know how many weeks that means, but probably not a lot. Anyway, we kibitz. But he says, I don't know what he says, but he says something about loving her. Yeah. And he definitely commits to it.

Yeah. He leans in. And he also says some really nice stuff about like, when we go to meet my parents, like, I'm going to be there for you during that. If you need me to stand next to you or hold your hand, you know, just let me know. Like, I'm there for you during this. In terms of actionable stuff, that's probably like, if I was the bachelor or bachelorette, that is what I would want to hear.

Because this is stressful as fuck. And I just have somebody be like, whatever you need to get through this afternoon with my family, just let me know. Yeah. That's good stuff. He's a sweet boy. I really appreciated that. And so they go and they meet Mikkel's mom, dad, his sister and her husband and their baby. And Mikel's whole family

is adorable. So good. They're just all like very, very nice. His mom is like, I got some Indian food because I thought that you might like seeing what... And Mikel's like, it's because we're Indian. You can say it.

But she's like, but I also got brisket for you, which is like also very, very good and sweet. Yeah, it's unlike hometowns in the American version where it seems almost always catered. Yeah, okay. It seems like there's a table out with a bunch of food, and the parents don't really take ownership of the food that's in front of them. But in this case, it felt like, oh, they really put it together. Mikkel's dad's first reaction was so bizarre because he was like, my first reaction to Jasmine is, I love blondes. And it's like, whoa, dog.

Yeah, he was a character. Yeah. And his sister was really sweet. She's only 14 months older than him. That's a lot, yeah. Which is wild. And we got some good baby pictures of Mikkel and his sister. These are the cutest kids.

Oh, and Mikkel's sister calls him Mik. Which is, I don't, I think that's one of those nicknames that just comes out of you say your family's name so, so, so often that you just look for the most efficient way to get through it. Because he does not strike me as a Mik. No. The Miks I know are like Mick Jagger, Mick Foley. One more. Mick Jagger. That's all.

I can only think of two Mick's. Yeah, no. That's why I asked you for a third. So his dad has some hesitation. And I would say like on the parental hesitation scale of hometowns, it's like a three out of 10. Well, yeah, it has nothing to do with Jasmine. It has nothing to do with like him being skeptical of the whole process.

It's more like he is pushing Mikkel to say like, how do you know? How do you know that this is the person? Mikkel gets really defensive. And he's like, how did you know with mom? Like, yo, this is the person it's really defensive and he's like how did you how did you know with mom like yo dog chill that's your dad's calm down and so yeah it's it's sold as this kind of like oh my dad's skeptical but like i didn't find it that no god because at this point i wanted to sit like bachelorette canada down and be like listen we've seen some a bad hometown dates this is not this is nothing this is a joke yeah this is a good hometown date you may be trying to position it as something else but like we were all there for desiree's family like we know how

how deep this this oubliette goes it gets dark down there who was the other one that you pointed out who was like oh claire's sister claire's sister we were there for that bachelorette canada okay that was a tour of duty that me and rachel survived together and i say survived because we would have died without each other during watching that episode well and don't forget um Jojo's brothers. Jojo's brothers. And Jojo's mom was all time. Yeah. She was a salve for Jojo's brothers who were coming at me, Griffin, outside of the television so hard. Yeah.

Jojo's mom was just like, I'm here for you, Griffin. I'm going to help you get past these rotten boys. Nobody was there for me for Clara's sister, though, except for you. Nobody was there for me for Desiree's brother, except for you. This is what was in our wedding vows, by the way. You helped me get through Des' brother. You helped me get through Claire's sister. JoJo's mom was there for me for JoJo's brother.

So I was fine there, but thank you. And then we exchanged rings. And then I said, I am, I am falling in love with you. And I said, thank you. And she said, thanks. And we've been together ever since. So the mom and the sister really like Jasmine. They think she's really cute and sweet.

And Jasmine tells them the story of the little necklace that Mikkel made. And they're really touched by it. And they seem to act like, oh, that's so Mikkel. Yeah. Did he say that it looked like he made it in prison? Yeah. Fuck. Because he was telling his mom, he was like, she didn't tell you about the necklace. Did she?

And she was like, yeah. He's like, it's looked like I made it in prison. That's good. Um, and so the mom and Mikkel sit down and the mom says, you know, I have, I have confidence in you. I have confidence in you. And it seems like you and Jasmine have similar priorities. And she says she was really touched that Jasmine shared the necklace story. She also extended him a line of credit that very few parents on hometowns ever do,

which is like, I don't know her, obviously, but I trust you and your judgment. So I'll get to know her obviously but i trust you and your judgment so like i'll get to know her yeah it's like that net that like sometimes you get the like no fuck this i don't know or get out of here or the we love her so much and both of those seem like well i mean one of them obviously seems more like horse shit than the other but the the logic of like yeah i trust you got a good head on your shoulders well i think a lot of times two parents during hometowns feel kind of performative. Like, I'm on camera.

I can't be too on board with this. So I'm going to make sure that it's very clear that I think this whole process is crazy. And they seem to think less about their individual child and what their child is saying to them and more like, this process is nuts and I just want it to them. And more like this process is nuts.

And I just want it to be on record that I think it's nuts. I think this is batshit crazy. Yeah. And so then they say goodbye. And this is when Jasmine says that she just wants to hug Mikkel and smooch his face all the time. Who doesn't? They have a real cute goodbye. Those two, those two guts to end up.

I'm feeling those two so hard part of me kind of checked out for the rest of the episode i obviously watched it um and maybe i was just the happiest because we had our thai food during the first part of the episode and so i was just like maybe my endorphins were you know how i get i have i have um food defensiveness like like a dog. And so when the food was gone, I was very sad. But also, like, I want Mikkel to win this so bad that I don't, I didn't, I wasn't as invested in the rest of the episode, I don't think. There is like, there is no part of Mikkel that feels false to me. Yeah. Like, nothing seems calculated.

At no point do I think, oh, this is just how he gets women. He's just a sweet boy. He's just a good, good boy. But he's also a dangerous leather daddy on that beautiful hog just tearing up asphalt. Just like getting chased by cops but getting away with it on his fast ride. The only thing I worry about with Mikkel... Is loving him too much? Is that there's no mystery there.

Isn't there, though? I guess the motorcycle is helpful. He's got a fucking motorcycle. He's a leather daddy. We didn't know this an hour and a half ago. That's true. fucking motorcycle he's a leather daddy we didn't know this an hour and a half ago that's true i just know some ladies like to feel like you know their their man is is is a person they can keep unwrapping their whole life i just i just bit into the familiar uh bar of of mikhail and i was like

okay uh peanuts nougat what What's this? A fucking motorcycle. What? It's weird that you kind of abandoned your metaphor there right there. I didn't, I didn't. Inside. There's a fucking motorcycle with a motorcycle in it. Yeah.

Anyway, let's get, let's get going. I wanted to put in that like disclaimer. Cause I don't, I feel like I don't remember that much about Mike except for his amazing champagne accident. Yeah. So Mike and Jasmine meet in Winnipeg in a park.

Jasmine has been to Winnipeg hundreds of times, but she has never been to this park. Do you want to take a stab at the name of this park? Asinopoeia? Asinopoeia? Asinopoeia? Asinopoeia. What was it? Asinopoin? Okay, that's pretty good.

The way I remembered it, so I wrote it down, but I also remember it kind of sounds like Cinnabon. Oh, that's good. Yeah. I wanted to point out somebody in the Rosebuddies group said all that they know. I saw this comment pop up. All that they know about Winnipeg comes from the Weaker Than song, One Great City, which has the chorus. And the chorus is just, I hate Winnipeg over and over again.

And that made me so happy. I wish I knew who that person was. But if we gave out points i would give them 15 points for that reference well done wow okay we could dance is probably like my main canadian cultural touchstone and i'm surprised that they're not referenced in every episode i guess they're not that big up there it's mostly like um well there's a lot i mean there's a lot standing in line ahead of that band i don't think so they're the best one oh okay yeah so okay a lot of people are like tragically hip and i get that they're certainly certainly out there probably

number two well i guess i'll have to tell bare naked ladies that you said that naked ladies like they're good they're definitely top 10 are they top 10 there's probably a canadian person who's like very upset that i just said that this This date in Ass Town. Griffin. It was a beautiful park in the Assinibon. Assinibon, yeah, there you go. But that makes it sound like they went to fucking Assinibon for their date, which might be good. Yeah, I wouldn't be mad if he brought me there on a date.

Bud, you forgot his fucking approach. I haven't gotten there yet. I've got it written down. Okay, okay, okay. I'm sorry. We've just been talking about Cinnabon for a while now. I'm hungry now. And horny. Cinnabon, you know how it does me. No,

I don't think I did. Just that it looks like a, it looks like a, like a, it looks like a big motel bed. No, no. It looks like, it looks like a big, a Cinnabon just looks like a big dirty mattress. This week's episode, unfortunately sponsored by Cinnabon. Sorry, Cinnabon. Sorry, Cinnabon.

But it just looks like a big, tasty, dirty mattress. So Mike meets her on a bridge, comes up carrying two piping hot cups of mccafe and he does a lot of shtick and you know how i feel about this um it's been light the past couple episodes fortunately he does like a little heel click there's a little heel click he does a little he does a dance he does a heel click and he does that same dance again and it's like i it was hard for me to be mad at him because they made him walk across a whole fucking bridge while filming him he probably had a good like minute and a half of pacing to do and he felt like the producers were glaring at him like do something mike whoa are you drunk right now no i'm holding my notebook with one hand like Like a pizza pie. Yeah, and it slipped.

Mike, it's not your fault. I'm going to let you have a schtick pass on this one. I wonder as far as the McCafes go. Yeah, they are a sponsor. They are listed in the ending slate of the show. How did they decide Mike got to be the vehicle?

McCafe boy? That's a good question. That's a good question. That's a good question. Do you think all three of them were approached and they're like, nah. No, I don't want to touch that stuff. And Mike was like, alright. Alright, I'll do it. Yeah, I don't know.

Maybe. I mean, at this point, it's been in so many episodes, it could be like a sentimental thing. Like, hey, Jasmine, I know you like this. Remember when we had that moment? It's our drink.

Shit. It's not that mcdonald's coffee isn't that bad i've had worse coffee um i've certainly had worse coffee um it's not it's not my favorite it's just a lot it's just like a lot it's like hot caramel it's like drinking a beaker of hot hot caramel. It's like drinking a beaker of hot caramel. You know? It's like drinking a beaker of hot caramel. It's like an early. And eating a dirty hotel mattress. That's my fucking ideal breakfast, though. Yeah.

I know that about you. I get my McCafe at McDonald's, and I get my dirty mattress at Cinnabon. And they say, do you want coffee with that? And I say, no, thanks. I'm covered. And I shake the McCafe at them violently until they get a little bit on them. a dirty mattress at cinnabon and they say do you want coffee with that and i say no thanks i'm covered and i shake them a cafe at them violently until they get they get a little bit on them what happens on their fucking date though uh so they go sit under a pretty tree and this is a nice tree this is where mike has his champagne oopsie this dude pops a cork and he is so obsessed with where the cork is going you gotta pay you gotta keep your head

on a swivel when you're popping a cork um because he pops it and the foam just like just like just like jizzes out all over his leg oh i know but there's no better verb to describe the way that this foam just like splooge it just that's worse baby you know it is it just like covers his whole calf yeah and it's it was so funny because like popping a champagne bottle i don't know there's so much pressure that comes with popping a champagne no that's true and i'm not that was not a joke it was not a pun maybe it was but there's so much pressure that comes with popping a champagne because it's a show well yeah you gotta look fucking cool while you do it

and so to get a considerable amount of champagne on your calf and your shoes is very funny to me I laughed very hard I mean there's also probably some like it's that Mr. Bean humor you love so much it's that Mr. Bean humor but it's also like

on a TV show about establishing your romantic dominance to have this like, for lack of a better term, like flaccid prop comedy was this emasculating visual gag was like so tasty to me. So rich. Yeah, we watched it a couple times. It's good stuff. If you missed it, back and watch it it's good kevin doesn't do so great a job with the champagne either but um this was this was tops uh so jasmine asks what mike sees is their future together in winnipeg and he says that they could go camping or they could go to the lake. And that's

those are kind of the things that he suggests. And then she asks how he feels about her. And he really doesn't do well. Here's the thing. Wait, let me read you the

direct quote of what he says. Please, yes. He says, I like you a lot. I think you're very cool. And you're someone I can see myself falling in love with. I can see myself, I can

see myself falling in, that's three deflect, that's so many deflect. Well, first, I take issue with the first two sentences. I can see myself falling in love with him. That's three deflections. That's so many deflections. Well, first, I take issue with the first two sentences. You're very cool. I like you a lot. I think you're very cool. I like Mike a lot.

I think he's been... Do you think he's very cool? I think he's very cool. Do you think he's very cool? I think he's very cool. And I can see myself falling in love with him. I feel like the last few episodes he's kind of been flagging a bit. I know. He started out so strong.

Started out really strong. And this happens sometimes. And he had so many highlights. I thinking about um when he was not performing especially well this episode i was thinking about when he first showed her his 10 pack and her reaction to that and how fucking great that scene was how uplifting and empowering that scene was uh but there haven't been that many there's haven't been that many moments like that and we're in we're in fucking final three is like, this is game time.

I think the thing is that Mike has been consistent. One might even say stable as Jasmine likes to, uh, but he's not going anywhere. That's the thing. His, this was his first, like time speaking at his first endorsement of Jasmine. And it was lukewarm.

And Jasmine, for this episode and the last couple episodes, whenever she talks about Mike, it is just, I just like that he's so stable and somebody I can just really come home to. And there's nothing wrong with that, but if it's the only thing you say about the person, like, I don't think either of these people are really into it. Yeah, the way that she talks about him is always like, it would be nice to be that woman in his life. You know, like, objectively, she sees the value in having a partner like Mike. And that's about as passionate as she can get. Yeah. partner like mike uh and that's about as passionate as she can get yeah like she never talks about being hugely excited to see him or feeling a lot of chemistry she just wants a big rock yeah she wants a rock to wind a string around as they might be giants might say

yeah she just wants a she just wants a pair of sweatpants that she can rely on. We say all that shit, but Mike is also, I think, a very funny dude. No, yeah. I mean, that's the thing. He's not like... I don't know that he's nearly as bland as he's getting sold in this show. But I think if that's the only thing that your romantic partner talks about, then it's not... It just ain't it just ain't right yeah it's one of those seasons where if he watched it back and watched mikhail and kevin's

relationship with her he would be like oh it's so dangerous because what you're saying is true if i was mike i would think like we're really hitting it off you You watch the other two. Fuck, if I was Kevin and I watched Mikkel's footage, I'd be like, whoa, dog. I know. I know. Because I thought we were like, thought it was meant to be. They have to know, though, because she always says Mikkel's name first at the rose ceremonies. He is the blaze of this season. Yeah.

To use Burning Love season two metaphor. Yeah. This is your, by the way, bi-monthly PSA to go watch Burning Love. If you like this podcast, you are going to like this television show. It's such a treat. So Mike is trying to set Jasmine up for meeting his dad, who he thinks is very straight-laced and even more guarded than he is. And that Jasmine's, quote, free-spiritedness might be in stark contrast to his kind of rigid approach to things. So she's kind of preparing herself for that.

And then when they go to meet, so it's Mike's dad and his dad's girlfriend, Mike's brother and his wife. His wife, Amanda. Amanda and his best's girlfriend, Mike's brother and his wife. His wife, Amanda. Amanda. And his best friend, who has a lot of luck. He looks like, and I'm going to get coarse here for a second. Uh-oh. But he looks like he uploads YouTube tutorials about cunnilingus.

Oh, God. tutorials about cunnilingus oh god oh god he's just got he's got um he's got this he's and he was a very very mean assessment of his look because he looks like a very sweet dude. So let me describe.

When you wear a backwards baseball cap with sunglasses over it, I have to, even if you're the sweetest dude in the world, and this guy was a very sweet dude and a very good friend to Mike, I can't not say something about it. Let me describe his look. Okay, please. Let me describe his look. Okay, please. And keep in mind that apparently everybody associated with this whole universe listens to our podcast and tread lightly. Oh, no. It's going to be completely factual.

He has shoulder length, brown, very curly hair. Can't tell how thick it is on top because he is wearing that backwards baseball hat. That's like a snap. I bet it's thick as fuck. I bet it's luscious. You've got to let me finish this description. Yes. It's only works if I can say the whole thing at once. Please let her rip. Okay.

So you can't tell how thick it is up top because he's wearing a, um, a baseball hat, like a, like a snapback hat with sunglasses on top. He's got a goatee. Yes. He's got both his ears pierced. Loving that. He seems to have some bracelets on. Oh, I didn't see that.

I didn't pay attention. Yeah. No, I... This show has made me so numb to men's wrist accessories. I don't even remember the clothes he's wearing, though, honestly.

Just the hat. Just the aesthetic is so... What's great is that he's like that Mike is like, this is my best friend. And it's like, really? Because y'all look the opposite. Y'all look like the opposite. I was kind of hoping it would be like a novelty hat that he removed and all the hair was attached to it. Oh.

And so it would be like a fun thing where he would take the hat off and all the hair would come with it and then he would have like a normal Mike haircut underneath. Well, we're saying that Mike's hair is normal. What if Mike's hair is weird and this dude's hair is normal and powerful? You think in Winnipeg everybody looks like that? Because here's the thing about this dude. He also pulled it off. He made it work.

He made it happen. He's probably one of those people that knows that people look at his whole look and he's like, I don't give a shit. There's something admirable about that. I mean, he seems like that was the thing I think that was delightful about him besides his appearance was that at no point did he do anything especially wacky. He just looked a little wacky. That's the thing. And he laid down some good advice for his friend there at the end. He did.

But I got to know that story, man. I want to know more about him. Go to youtube.com slash boxblaster11. Oh, God, Griffin. That's his URL. You want me to lie about his URL? How do you know? How do you know?

How do you know? Because he said it. Yeah? Yeah. It wasn't like you were i recognized him oh god um let's talk more about mike and not about box blaster 11 though okay Okay. So Mike's dad is way less rigid than Mike presented him as. So much so that when Jasmine talks a bit about herself and then mentions that she's a hairstylist, and Mike says that Mike's late mother was a hairstylist. Nope. Nope. Mike's dad's mom was a hairstylist. Mike's dad says, well, maybe I should be dating you.

Yeah. Oops. Uh-oh. Which must have been fun for the girlfriend he had sitting next to him. Must have been fun for every person within a one-mile radius. Mike's dad also said that he spent a lot of summers in Kenora, where Jasmine's from. Yes. So they kind of hit it off right away.

Kenora, where Jasmine's from. Yes. So they kind of hit it off right away. And the dad seems very open to the relationship and kind of talks about how Mike should, you know, really open his heart and play the odds with this opportunity. And Mike's friend kind of says the same, like, you have to take risks here. Yeah. But Mike is just saying, you know, I don't think it's been enough time. It just kind of seems like everybody's on board except Mike is like nervous and kind of withholding.

And Jasmine leaves the date feeling like she doesn't really know how he feels. Right. Like this is as good a reception as you could hope for as a contestant on this show. And he didn't seem that psyched about it. Yeah. Well, at first he was like, I want to see how my family reacts before I commit to it. And then it felt like, well, he didn't have that excuse anymore because they were on board. And then it was just about Mike, you know, not being ready.

Yep. It's too bad, but what can you do? Yeah. So final date, Kevin in Waterloo, Ontario. Kevin, I guess, currently lives in Toronto, but he comes home to Waterloo once a week for dinner. Or else his mom will freak the fuck out. So this is when hometowns became what we know and love about hometowns. This is good, dude.

How unexpected. I liked Mikkel's family. They're very sweet. And I liked that Mike's family was unexpectedly into it. This is why we bachelor, though. This is Kevin's mom and Kevin's sister-in-law. Or was that his bio-sis?law? Or was that his biosis? Like, fuck, this is why we do it, folks.

So it was Kevin's mom, Kevin's sister, Kevin's dad. Oh, no, no, no. It wasn't Ray. It was his sister-in-law. It was his sister-in-law. It was his brother's wife and his niece. But first they go drive around his hometown. Yeah.

And they go have champagne on a football field. He counts out how many yards. He blasts a champagne cork. And he spills a little bit on the ground. I don't think any hits his bod. But just saying. Keep your head on a fucking swivel. I'm blown away when people.

Everybody knows. You cover the top of the bottle with like a rag and you pop it like that and then you just don't no fuss no must you don't have to fucking worry about it when I see somebody do it like the they just hold the cork exposed and they push it with their thumbs I'm like you're gonna hurt somebody

well it adds to the dramatic presentation how many people do you think die from champagne corks every year I you think that you're gonna find that on the internet? You can find anything on the internet. Okay, well, he's looking it up now. Give me a number. I guess I'll say 13. Believe

it. How many did you say? 13. Believe it or not, champagne corks kill almost 24 people each year. Keep your... Keep your fucking head on a swivel! What is your source? This radio station.

Okay. Wait, that doesn't seem accurate. I can understand injuring yourself, getting like a little bruise, maybe... Okay, no, I rate this shock jock radio show was selling me a line champagne io9 has a scientific breakdown of it and that most corks come out of bottles at about 24.8 miles per hour which isn't especially it's not a deadly trajectory for comparison a bullet goes between 600 to 1100 miles per hour so even at 60 miles

an hour a bullet would have a tough time killing a person okay so maybe maybe but still eyes that hits you in the eye that's bad that'll hurt that'll ruin your that'll ruin your friday night i'm just saying please pay attention i'm saying this to you rachel if you're at a party without me and it looks like somebody's about to pop off a champagne bottle, and they don't have a rag covering it, leave. Leave the party. Leave the fucking party. It's a dangerous environment. It's not worth it.

Yeah. It'll hit you in the nose or your eye. Yeah. Or what if you have your mouth open because you're laughing at a good joke somebody said, and you... But Griffin, you won't be there there so i won't be laughing at anything that's a good point because we have rules that's right yes laugh for me my angel of music okay yes okay laugh for me my angel of goofs there's the laugh i need

this has been kind of a weird episode. Yeah, I'm turning into the fucking phantom of the of the improv over here. So while they're on the football field, this is when Kevin kind of opens up a little bit more. This was a good scene for Kevin. Yeah, so Kevin talks about how

while he was kind of a popular kid growing up, he never really liked himself and never really felt like he was good enough. And he kind of would end every day feeling like he didn't do enough. I didn't expect Kevin to ever say anything that kind of resonated with me. But this idea of like, I could have done more today. I do that now. Like, I still do that. And so this was the first, like like vulnerable time we got with kevin

yeah where i was like obviously he's like told the story about his brother and um some of his his military stories but this was the first thing he said i was like oh okay i get that i mean you look like taylor kish i didn't think you had days like that but that's that's good to hear yeah and uh and jasmine really appreciates him opening up and he says, you know, one of the times he felt really accomplished was the day that he got this war medal that he, like, carries around with him. And sometimes he'll just kind of look at it and feel pride in himself for what he's accomplished. But that ever since he's been with Jasmine, he kind of feels that way without needing that reminder. And so he gives her the medal. And we don't ever get to see it up close for some reason.

We don't get to see it, which was strange. It was a little strange. I thought we'd get a little zoom in. We did not. I'm not saying it was fake or whatever. I'm just saying it was kind of a weird choice. But this was so sweet. And I was so saying it was kind of a weird choice. But this was so sweet, and I was so into it.

And it was, I, my, Kevin got so many Kevin points in my book. Yeah, suddenly I could kind of understand. Why, yeah. Why Kevin? Because in the past couple episodes, like, Kevin has been doing so well. And I don't dislike Kevin. But I haven't really gotten, like, why he is such a front runner until now. Like, yeah, that's a really sweet, very open story, Kevin.

I mean, I will say that Mikkel delivers this kind of heat every week. But you talked about like holding it back, holding it back, holding it back. Nobody's held it back as much as Kevin, except for the other Kevin who held it back too much. Yeah. And then got dumped on the rock. Yeah. Not Kevin W?

Which Kevin are we still with? Kevin W is the one we're still with. Yes, good. Yeah, this was like a... I am coming around... It kind of reminds me of JoJo. I was a very late member of Team JoJo in the Axeman season.

Maybe that's going to happen here. Yeah, me too. Maybe. Maybe that's going to happen here. Yeah, me too. Maybe. Maybe. Yeah, it's not like, I mean, still 100% Mikkel. Oh, yeah, don't get me wrong. But I get Kevin. But it's not one of those situations.

I kind of got spoiled on the end of the episode. Well, let's wait. We'll get to it in time. I would not be as like incensed if kevin won um is what i'm saying uh so the other thing kevin does is that he says that he has fallen in love with her uh and that he's blown away by her and that say it to his to her face now yeah okay i know she he said it to her face i didn't remember when in the episode. Yeah. And then he feels like the risk of telling her this is worth the reward. And that was also kind of a surprise.

Yeah. Just putting it out there. Yeah. And so they're driving back to his house, and he lets her know that he has not brought a lady home in six years. While he's driving, he's like, by the way, if we end up together, we're going to have to do this every week, or my mom will lose her shit. He explains that his mom is like the leader of the family,

and basically sets her up like, my mom is going to rake you over the fucking coals. Well, he doesn't say quite that much. I mean, there is a suggestion that- You have to warn somebody at hometown about a member of your family. Yeah. It doesn't- Just to give you a heads up, my mom might be a little bit, okay, so she's going to like execute me, is what you're saying.

So they all sit down when they get there. For about two and a half seconds. Yeah. And the first minute, Kevin's mom remarks upon how attractive Jasmine is and says, I'm surprised that such a beautiful girl would take this route. So fucking good. Like a decadent Cinnabon role. Like so fucking. To start out with that. Because there is no response to that. You are shut down.

You're so attractive. It's weird that you'd have to find love on television. I know. Wow. And then when Jasmine kind of stumbles around for a while trying to figure out how to appropriately answer that, this is when Kevin's mom tells us, the viewer, that Jasmine's kind of a chatterbox and that listening is important, you know, and that she really seems to do a lot of the talking. Kevin also says. Which is shade number two. Kevin says, you know,

this relationship has really ended that his mom was like, Oh, well, I mean, you've known each other for a few weeks. What do you say? It was his dad. His dad says,

you guys look like a really good couple. And that's when Kevin's mom is like, what are you talking about? They've known each other for a few weeks. They're not a couple. Yeah. And so Jasmine starts saying, well, this process is kind of weird in that you kind of start

out learning a lot about somebody and learning all the really deepest parts of somebody. And then you kind of work backwards from there. And so his mom, without missing a beat, starts to quiz her like, oh, yeah, yeah. Well, why don't you tell us one of the deepest parts of Kevin?

And Jasmine throws her hat over the fence. She's like, well, your son got stabbed, your other one. And she's like, oh, okay. Well, yeah. Almost like that was some sort of like password. Like, well, we don't tell that to anybody in this. So that is a big leap. Yeah. It just was so uncomfortable. It was really uncomfortable. But at the same time, like, I was so into it because I feel like everything this we talked about, like parents having to play this role of the over concerned parent. I genuinely believe that everything Kevin's mom was saying was coming from a place of all-consuming worry. Yeah, for sure.

But it was so fucking real. Like, you can't, this is all a joke, right? This is my son. This is a goof, right? I will say, though, that it wasn't just worry. It was like, I control this situation yeah yeah i mean she literally says i'm looking for the woman that's going to replace me which is like yeah i hated that i hated that so much bad news bears i will say maybe griffin and i are kind of

spoiled but like neither of us comes from a family where this is the kind of behavior that you bring to the table. You don't even know. I don't feel like my family or your family felt the need to challenge. That's because you're a winner. I brought you around and the fam was like, yes. I bring around a stinker and they just like what are you saying jasmine's a stinker no but if the family if the if kev's family thinks that i don't actually think i think the lens of this show fucks us up sometimes because we watch these other two

families they're like yeah marry my boy yeah please please marry my boy. Yeah, please marry my boy. Yeah. And then being like, you've known each other for 21 days. Chill the fuck out. Eric Taylor would do that shit on Friday Night Lights, and he did to Matt Saracen, who is his QB1. But you don't think less of him. It's just like, you've got to protect your shit. You haven't known each other that long. Calm down. Yeah, I get that.

I just, these are like adult adults you know like i don't if if when our when our child is is 25 years old and he's like i've brought a girlfriend i've known her for three weeks and or a boyfriend i this is my partner i've known them for three weeks. And I think they're going to ask me to marry them next week. I would be like, hey, yo, fuck that, dog. No. That's so soon. That's very fast and very quick. And for some people, like, for some folks on this show, that's a real roadblock.

Because the math of that is crazy. It is. I just think there's a there's a constructive way to have that conversation where you know maybe but you can't expect that of everybody and also i don't think there's a constructive way to have that conversation because i feel like every other family on this show just doesn't have it oh it's it's it's may 22nd you met them may 1st and you want to get engaged on may 28th yeah sure fucking go for it that's insane that's nuts yeah i'm always willing to cut family slack in hometowns because i believe i have to believe that for the ones where it breaks bad not jojo's brothers they were just angry but for the

families where it breaks bad it's like this, this is a crazy proposition. And we forget that sometimes when we talk about it, but it's a crazy... It is. In less than a span of six weeks, I'm going to go from not knowing until you get it. I don't fault families for their skepticism. I do fault them for behaving as if they can't trust their own child

to think of their own best interests. Yeah, sure. Which is all I'm saying like it's like what i was saying earlier when i was saying that parents will sometimes forget what they know about their own kid yeah and just make it clear that they are opposed to the very nature of this show and as soon as kevin steps up to his mom she kind of like backs down. No, that's true. That's true. So anyway, so let's get to that. So his brother's wife also kind of throws some shade and says, you know, so how many are left?

And Jasmine's like, oh, well, Kevin's one of three. And she's like, well, do you feel romantic with all three? Jesus. And Jasmine's like, well, I mean with all three and jasmine's like well i mean i guess like in different in different ways i do um again another good answer there's no good answer for um so this is when the mom and um the brother's wife pull jasmine away and this is when the mom throws probably the worst shade of the whole episode. Because she's talking about how Kevin's job is so demanding.

Oh, man, this was brutal. This was so savage. So Kevin is a firefighter, correct? I think firefighter paramedic, maybe? Or is that Mike? Well, is that Mike? I don't know. I think Kevin is ex-Navy firefighter okay and mike is firefighter

paramedic um but talks about how kevin you know seems really tough but is really sensitive and he's like yeah you know sometimes kevin will call me um after a particularly hard day and talk for like two hours just to process what happened to him while he was out at work. And she's like, Jasmine, do you think you can sit and listen? Because I know you're kind of a chatterbox. Like, what if you come home really ticked off about some lady upset about her hair and Kevin's upset because somebody died that day. This was unbelievable. There are so many layers of- There's like 12 layers of shitty things

you just said in there. So stacks upon stacks of disrespect that Jasmine, you can tell, doesn't, again, doesn't even know where to start with responding. Let's try to break it down. His mom asserts that she is the only one who will ever be able to make her son feel better ever. Yes. Asserts that Jasmine's a fucking chatterbox, and that's not a cute term. Yeah, that she's not a good listener.

She's not a good listener, and sometimes you have to listen, which is like, he's only known me for three weeks, that's fine. You've known me for probably 20 minutes, so you need to pump the fucking brakes, too. Asserts that her job is bullshit, and that it's certainly much, much, much less important than her son's job. And that it's her job as a wife to put his... To put his needs ahead of hers. But also to assert that, like, Rachel, if you came home from work tomorrow and, like, I had had a bad day

of dealing with somebody mean on the internet, and you were like, oh, well, somebody died at my job today, I would be like, holy shit, what? Like, of course, that would be your reaction. And to assert that that would not be hurt, well, someone died, well, let me tell you about this bad

ombre I gave somebody. That's how it's pronounced. I spent some time in France. France. Giving people ombre. Then what is that? Ombre?

Yeah, I just want you to describe it for me. That's where the hair goes from one color to the other color. Don't try to step to me on this. Okay, I was just making sure. No, you weren't making sure. You're trying to quiz. You're trying, who wants to be a millionaire in me? That's a very good definition.

Okay. I just, you don't typically ombre somebody. It's like a style of hair that you wouldn't like. Hey, are you sure about that? You wouldn't use it as a verb. Are you sure about that? You sure you wouldn't? How much ombre have you done to folks?

My hair is very short. I could ombre you. Yeah. What do you want? I want my hair to be one color and then to turn into another color. Which two? Tell me now. I want it to start out like a Cinnabon and go into a McCafe.

So tan into a slightly lighter tan. Okay, I can do this. Okay. Anyway, yes, this is one of the most brutal. That was rough. That's what I'm saying. Like, be skeptical all you want, but like, be respectful. You don't have to be shitty about it.

Yeah, that was rough um and so the mom goes on to say that she's always been kevin's connection okay uh and the fact that this all could result in an engagement kind of blows her mind and that she's near near tears thinking about it. Because how could somebody understand and love her son in a few weeks? And if a woman is going to take her place, and she says this to the camera, she doesn't say this to Jasmine. Thank God, because there would have been a, I hope there would be a Jasmine-shaped hole in the wall. She would miss the door by a good eight feet and just like Kool-Aid man it out the fuck there.

There's, there's so much that is frustrating to me about that phrasing of like, the woman is going to take my place. It's like, it's like 1943. And this man doesn't know how to do his own laundry. And she is saying, somebody is going to take over my duties, and I will have no purpose anymore.

It's one of those, like, such, like, very efficient sentences that is bad for all three parties involved in the statement. Like, it sounds bad for her to say. Yeah, nobody wins with that phrasing. It sounds bad for her to say. Yeah, nobody wins with that phrasing. So then she just sits down with Kevin outside and she talks about how she has reservations about the process. And she's like, you know, well, if you're going to cry, then I'm going to cry. And, you know, we're so similar. And she's like, I just really want to know how you feel.

And he's like, well, I've never felt this way before, and it really feels like love at first sight. And that's when she kind of flips a little bit and says, well, if that's really true, then I believe in that, and I'm so happy for you. But if in a couple of weeks we're crying together, I'm going to be upset. Okay.

So Jasmine leaves that encounter, and she tells us, you you know the family was not warm she's not sure she can handle being a part of this family and i do not blame her no god that was rough it was a rough hometown now i would say it's top five yeah in terms of like not getting just accepted into the fold yeah i mean I mean, so we love Jasmine. We think Jasmine's great. Yeah. We think everybody should like her because she seems very honest and very just comfortable

in who she is. And it seems like anybody could pick that up right away. Yeah. So it's just surprising, I guess, to see someone be so tough on her yeah i mean it's also surprising because i would say like 90 of the time the families are just like yeah okay we'll play along and so it is especially striking when what's what's your favorite hometown family of all time i have two oh chris souls chris souls you remember or was that sean no that was chris that was chris um yes that was my number one yeah who is it that goes to his hometown uh dez

i think it was dez was it or andy andy it was definitely and Andy. Yeah. And they all hang out and they play Ghost in the Graveyard out on this farmland. And his family just seems like super, super great. So, so good. I also really liked Chris's family on Des' season where his dad is the chiropractor and gave them chiropractic treatments, and gave them chiropractic treatments, which involved putting a big balloon up his nose and yanking the snot out of his son on television. Yeah. So close.

And then, of course, Luke's dad recently was great. Luke's dad. Luke's sweet dad. Oh, Luke's sweet dad. Yeah. You made me think about Luke's sweet dad. Now I'm sad. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Love that dad. Can we get to the rose ceremony? Okay, so we're back in Vancouver for the rose ceremony, and we see everybody kind of going to the location. And then we find out Mike has decided that he's going to go to Jasmine's hotel and let her know how he feels about her, because he recognizes that he didn't really make that clear when they were in his hometown. No, he did a bad job.

So he goes to her room and she is already dressed for the rose ceremony. And he says, you know, when you met my family and your time in my hometown made it clear to me that I'm falling in love with you. and made it clear to me that I'm falling in love with you. And she tells us, the viewer, that she's grateful, and she tells him thanks and goodbye, and that was it. That's it. So then it's rose ceremony time, and Noah comes out, says, you know, the next week you're going to get to meet Jez's family, and you're going to spend more time with her than ever before, which in America, we would call the fantasy suite and overnights.

Oh, I didn't even think about that. But that's what they're, yeah. You're going to get to spend more time with her than ever before. It's overnight. And Mike's friend popped up. He's like, I'll teach you a few tricks. Don't be nervous, boys. I'll be right there in the room with you.

Drew out these diagrams. Just follow him. Here's a peach. Oh, God, Griffin. I could eat a peach for hours. Face off. That was a face off. Face off, yeah.

I could eat a peach for hours. Such an upsetting movie. What happens next? So, Mikkel gets to Rose first. Not surprising. And then it's down to Kevin and Mike and she picks Kevin.

So, I follow the Rose Buddies hashtag on Twitter, which there's a Minecraft server that a lot of people tweet about using that hashtag. What's up? What's up, RoseBuddies? Other alternate universe RoseBuddies. But I kind of felt like Kevin maybe was going to stay because like six people all tweeted at the same time and that hashtag, Kevin?

But like, honestly, watching the episode, like, you know Mike's going watching the episode like you know mike's going home you gotta know mike's going the way she talks about mike is not the way she talks about kevin and like kevin's kevin's doing good yeah uh so mike goes and she tells him you know i could very much see a future with you and i met your family that was very clear to me but things have just always kind of happened late for us and he seems very understanding about it uh and then things get weird

here's that fucking dumb ending that I talked about just like out of nowhere Mikkel's doing a behind the scenes interview and he's like you know I'm just I know I should be happy but I'm so sad because like this always happens to me and and I always get hurt. Yeah, she's going to let me down.

She's going to let me down because I always get let down. And then he's standing up, and then you hear his voice say, maybe I should just go. I should just leave. And then he's standing there, and she comes up, and she's like, what's wrong? Are you upset? And he's like, I just... And then that's it. And then over the credits, we just watch a limo

drive away to sad music. There's no fun bloopers. And it's like, guys, we have watched so much of this fucking show. This is some American Bachelor Bush League bullshit. It was weird

because it was missing so much connective tissue like they don't show him walking down the stairs they don't show him getting in a car they don't it's literally mike getting in his cab like well you know i'm just really upset and then hard cut to mikhail like having a fucking conniption and it's not it's they don't explain it it's such it's coming out of fucking okay so mikhail leaves what's the last fucking episode of this television show then well i didn't even i wasn't even sure that's what they were trying to communicate at first because i saw this like far away helicopter footage of a limo driving and i was like is that mike are we following mike in the limo or are we

are you trying to trick us because like the last 45 seconds of this episode was Mikel saying he was going to leave the show. It was such a, it was such a, just a bad treatment, man. I mean, all I can think, because you know how in the American Bachelor and Bachelorette, they always have to cast a little doubt. Even if it's like a very, very clear front runner, they still have to find a way to try and make you think i don't think mikhail is a clear front runner maybe they're worried that

that he seems that way though if he is then there's other ways to do it this is this was this was brute force dumb because i'm watching that thinking like there's another episode of this television there's another 66 minutes of this television show and if it starts with mikhail going home after this rose ceremony you tell me what the other 66 the other 65 and a half minutes are maybe 60 maybe 58 minutes after they're sad just heard chasing him around the world yeah carmen san diego style like please mikhail please come back to me this This was the only time. And again, still love Canadian Bachelorette.

Love it so much. I've been wrestling with the fact how I want to continue watching the Canadian Bachelor and Bachelorette even once the American version start up again. And I don't know how to do that. I don't know how we find time with that once we have a baby to watch two international versions of the same fucking show. Yeah, I know. once we have a baby to watch two international versions of the same fucking show yeah this was the first time where this show has like openly insulted me griffin mackroy the viewer because even if i hadn't watched the show before it would still be insulting but i've watched so much of this shit i know how it works you can't end your episode like what if the front runner just leaves

and that's literally the whole setup what if if he's just gone? He's not going to be gone. I guess I didn't feel quite as angry about it as you did. It's the first, it was a betrayal, if anything. The show has been so, it's been so nurturing compared to the American version, which in the last two seasons has been like hateful towards its audience, if anything. That's true. Not counting Bachelor in Paradise. We talked about that watching Bachelor in Paradise. Bachelor in Paradise is a love letter, aside from the rocky opening of this last season. It is a love letter to the fans of the show while the main series catalog is becoming like, you like this?

Fuck you. This is the only time in the Canadian Bachelorette where it has kind of been like, idiot. What if he just leaves, dummy? Are you afraid, stupid? Maybe this is an example where we should be watching the after show because i bet that they would they would make us feel better about what this is an example why we should be hosting the after show oh griffin i would just be like oh no come on stop it and then you'd like innersplice footage of you leaving the set and then just random footage of a tank going down the street and suggesting that you left a tank. We could be, you and me could be the Chris Hardwick of Canadian dating shows.

Just like we are always like extended universe, just unpacking it. I mean, we're doing that here. We don't need to have a television show on the W Network for that. You don't think we're too edgy, though? We're pretty edgy. I don't know if you could get away with your... Cunnilingus instructor persona that I adopted for a bit. Yeah, maybe not.

Yeah, probably not. There's nothing weird about that. You know, it's a service. It provides to certain subscribers. To Boxbuster 11? Was that it? I can't remember. It was. Don't worry about it. Or was it Blaster?

That's what I said. Boxbuster 11. Or I say Boxbuster. I sounded like you said Buster. Boxbusters. Blockbuster. Blockbuster Video 11. Yeah. That was it. That was actually it. Shit.

Thank you all for listening to Rose Buddies. We'll be back next week. Oh, we didn't go to the P.O. Box. Oh, shit. Oh, well. We did forget to go to the P.O. Box. We apologize. I hope nobody sent us like truffles or something because that'll be goo.

We got a really good Facebook group it's it's the best facebook group in the whole it's the best facebook group uh it's just rose buddies go join it if you listen to this and you're not in the facebook group it is like you are missing the like ancillary material that like explains the rest of the work you have to be and you guys if you haven't reviewed us on iTunes, please do. Hey, that would be cool of you. And no pressure.

Like, I know that's a lot to ask. I don't think I've ever reviewed anything on iTunes, so I get it. But like, it does help us out in a big way. So,

we appreciate it. Anything else, babe? I don't know what the next episode's gonna be. I don't know if it's gonna be Men Tell All or if it's gonna be the finale. I do not know.

I don't know. From what I have heard in our facebook group it is not men tell all it is like part one of the finale oh no don't stretch it out there's just two boys just pick one of the boys i'll pick one right now mikhail done mikhail you know mikhail is in the facebook group mikhail okay i don't want to put anybody on black he is a silent participant there's a lot of silent participants let me say this watch what you fucking say yeah be careful you better watch out better not cry kyle kyle has made himself known yeah oh you know who else is in the facebook group i do noah noah's in the group

guys you know who else is in the group with noah Noah's lady love. So be careful what you say about Noah. They dressed up. Noah's brother. His brother dressed up. That was really good. As Noah and I guess Noah's brother's girlfriend dressed up as Jasmine. Yeah. It's weird that we know this.

It's weird that it's not weird that like that we've like memorized this. It's weird that that information has gotten to us and we are now saying it on the podcast yeah but it's also beautiful it's the circle of life um there's a lot of folks from the tv show in the group and we are uh flattered that you are all we enjoy your company feel free to leave if we enjoy your television show i know i went hard on the ending of this one but it's only because it was straight dookie. The rest of the show has been really good. Hey, I'll say this. If Mikkel fucking leaves with his own volition next week, I will literally get

my Cincinnati Reds ball cap that I have had since 2006 and I will fucking eat it on the air. Okay. That's fair. But it's not going to happen because I've seen a billion hours of this television show and I know how it works. Thank you, though. Until next time, I'm Griffin McElroy.

I'm Rachel McElroy. When you're ready. Final Rose. Stay with us on this journey of joy. Spoiler alert. She is up with Soulja Boy. Right reasons. Right reasons.

Can't figure all four seasons.