Wonderful! - Ep. 59: The Best Hometowns Ever
Episode Date: February 21, 2017WHAT A GOOD EPISODE OF THE BACHELOR!!! We were very excited to talk about the good, good families that these women have, and how Nick is going to systematically disappoint them as we reach this season...'s final stretch. Join us, won't you? MaxFunDrive ends on March 29, 2024! Support our show now by becoming a member at maximumfun.org/join.
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Maybe you should go and do some contemplating.
Right reasons, right reasons, being a good girl for all the right reasons.
Right reasons, right reasons, being a good girl for all the right reasons.
I'm the best rat and I'm rapping to your poolside.
Here to find true love, one man for my whole life.
Hi, this is Rachel McElroy.
Hi, this is Griffin McElroy.
And this is Rose Buddies.
And welcome to Hometowns. We'd like you to meet our dad, Spencer.
Hey, what's up?
My name is Spencer.
We should really talk about the bits you're going to do.
This is our mom.
Her name is Megan.
Griffin, I can only do one voice.
I'm talking about myself in third person because Korn's family has ruined me.
Hoo boy. What an episode of The Bachelor, the television show for ABC. Griffin, I can only do one voice. I'm talking about myself in third person because Korn's family has ruined me.
Hoo boy.
What an episode of The Bachelor, the television show for ABC.
I have talked about for years that I love hometowns.
You say, I love hometowns as much as I love our dad, Spencer.
Yes.
What's your favorite thing about Spencer, our dad?
His big, bushy ear hair.
Yeah, it's crazy um call him broccoli broccoli head because it just looks like he's just sprouting it out sprouting out god i love you spencer dad um but i feel like i have
been let down in years past from hometowns because of how bad and shitty they are they're usually
very disappointing and boring and bad and shitty this are. They're usually very disappointing. And boring and bad and shitty.
This season.
This may have been the best episode of The Bachelor I've ever seen.
I don't want to like, I don't want to, well, I don't want to tell tales out of school.
And part of it was I have drank a bottle of Le Fin du Monde again.
And just getting that good Belgian kindness flowing through my veins.
A lot of it was, I think this episode needs an executive producer credit for Ariel.
Your very good friend and. My friend and fellow rosebuddy ariel rosebuddy ariel who's uh in town visiting made us dinner made us dinner and is keeping an eye on henry so we can
record thank you ariel so much and i feel like i could really let my hair down and just soak in
this fucking excellent excellent episode of the bachelor where all
four dates were pretty fucking good they were like each of them brought us closer to the women
and made me respect each of them more yeah like that has never happened it made me realize just
how much like storytelling has been done through like the edit this season and how like unfair i think it was in
a lot of cases especially like i don't know like corn's date was like cute and sweet and it became
kind of evident that she's just kind of like a like a very young person who like i don't think
is evil like this show is trying to make us believe and it's just kind of like i mean probably
a little shallow maybe a little shallow but like fucking but generous yeah and that's describing 94 of the people that i've ever been on this show
so like it's an unfair characterization but man what a fucking good episode y'all yeah good for
nick too like it was it was i i feel invested in this season and it won me back like i feel like
i've been like pretty overtly negative about this season the last won me back like i feel like i've been like pretty overtly
negative about this season the last few episodes and this one is like i'm fucking on board yeah i
don't know about that twist though they tried to twist it on me there at the end yeah there's there's
of course a cliffhanger because now there's always a cliffhanger and this week's cliffhanger is just
dumb i'm into it man but do you think it's really going to turn into anything
absolutely not no it'll be dumb dumb dumb stuff it'll be like two minutes oh they'll deal with
it before the first commercial break but still um let's let's get into it let's get the fuck
into it then uh first hometown goes oh actually before we even do hometowns we have to resolve last week's shitty cliffhanger
which was i don't even oh my god nick sent christina home could another woman be going home
too this was really frustrating because it's literally the exact same shit that they did
last last week during last week's episode there was the beginning cliffhanger of, what if he just quits the show?
And I was, what if he just sends one or more additional women home before hometowns?
And it's like, he's not.
Not for hometowns, because what are they going to do?
Go to spend a fucking hour in Hoxie and an hour in Miami?
No.
The poor women, you can tell, have been coached to sit around and talk about this.
Because you can tell they have nothing left to say. Because Corinne's like yeah i mean he's just unpredictable we don't know for
sure and he's not unpredictable he's hyper predictable and rachel's like well but usually
there's four women but i guess maybe there would potentially be less women that could do hometowns
and corinne's like i'm just so nervous and all the women are like yeah me too who knows
what he's going to do and they're just waiting for nick to show up which he does and then again
doesn't send any of them home fucking of course not brings four roses lets raven who already has
a rose accept a rose again and it does make the point because some of you in the facebook group
and it's true said if he skips the rose ceremony then these women don't get a chance to accept yeah the opportunity to be there was an emphasis on like consent in a really
interesting way that was like it's hometowns like if i didn't give you roses i would be inviting
myself to your fucking like family barbecue yeah um and so he really stressed like it is important
for it so much so that he gave one to raven he offered one to raven raven already had a rose you know what i just thought about what if
he showed up at their house with three roses raven doesn't have her rose on her and suddenly it's
kind of weird yeah for him to stress like it's important for me to like be given consent to come
to your hometown well i mean but she already did accept one for the group date and so i'm saying
visually it's weird visually it's weird.
Visually it's weird if he shows up with three. He says, Raven, I've already given you a rose.
But like, it's been a couple of days and I know things can change really quickly.
So I still wanted to offer you one.
I thought it was a nice moment.
Like, it was a nice, like, sort of.
I think it was more about optics of like, I'm physically going to come here.
It's not a rose ceremony.
So you won't be holding a rose and I don't want you to feel left out.
Maybe.
Yeah.
But yeah, either way way they all get roses and then they all disperse to their individual hometowns yes so
first up hoxie alabama kansas i just sort of merged a bunch of uh a a starting southern states
together because i wasn't sure which one we're it is arkansas excellent excellent uh with raven and um raven and nick start out their date on a four-wheeler
and um i was going to ask you because i don't have a lot of familiarity
is a four-wheeler and an atv the same thing um And an ATV the same thing. I think it's, if you were to draw a Venn diagram, I think ATV.
It's like a square is a rectangle rectangle.
Right, I think ATVs are four-wheelers, but not all four-wheelers are ATVs.
Okay.
Because I think ATVs are somewhat lighter of a four-wheeler in the four-wheeler family,
but there can be big-ass heavy four-ers that have like cargo space and shit like that.
That can be used more as like cargo based vehicles that you would use on a farm.
These were heavy boys.
Because the light ones are dangerous as fuck.
You'll flip an ATV over on you and that's it.
That's the ball game.
And they couldn't have.
They were doing some stunting in these four wheelers.
I mean we'll get to that.
Yeah.
These were not like motocross.
Motocross is like a, I think those are ATVs and they're like light.
Does that make sense?
I'm sure if you're not correct, we will hear about it.
Probably.
Somebody's like, I'm actually an ATV salesman.
And what you've just said was the most offensive thing I've ever heard.
And what you've just said was the most offensive thing I've ever heard.
So they get on their ATV and they go to a, what looks like a large silo.
It's a grain bin.
And Raven, it's kind of a weird setup, but you just kind of take it.
I mean, she seems so believable in everything she says.
So she's like, oh, everybody here goes to the grain bins.
And you go.
When you have something important to talk about, you go to the grain bin to do it.
The grain bins hold a lot of secrets here.
And they start walking up the stairs.
And you're just, I mean, I was like, yeah, of course.
You go to the grain bins.
Like, I didn't even question it.
I thought they were going to fucking climb into a grain bin and there would be some, like, fucking Carcosa,
true detective, like, shit happening in the grain bin.
Like, a secret, secret like castle inside um and they don't get in there yet because the police show up which i mean right away it's like well
this seems staged and and the officer gets out and says neither of you have any id on you
uh and they don't because they were on a four nick makes some case like oh we were
going to get on this four-wheeler so i didn't want to carry my wallet i don't know i think it
tracks you don't want to you don't want to hit a like a cool ramp and then all of a sudden your
your identification's gone somewhere and a you know a frog bursts from your tight pants yeah um and and then the officer is like
well this this one here has been giving me trouble for years and nick looks at raven is like do you
know her and turns out the officer is her brother prank prank got him i called this by the way like
yeah as soon as the cop showed up i was like oh
it's her brother um and it was a good prank can i say this the brother is fucking like sold like
he sold it like excellent like weston weston the technical emmy goes to weston for his well it
wouldn't be a technical emmy would it no unless he did some you know did you some foley work yes and he was the best boy he
was the best boy of this day the best boy weston um it was it was fun it was cute all these dates
were so cute yeah it was a real aw shucks moment it's a real aw shucks moment although i did want
them to climb in a fucking grain bin yeah we never got to see them go in there i thought they might
jump in and like would you just sink into the grain i think i'd freak out like if if
ray or would they go against the grain i love you i love you too that was a that was a challenging
one it was very good thank you um that was cute it's a cute day yeah it seems they seem really
cute together like i think one
of the most striking things about this hometowns episode is like all four of them seem like really
good and it's just that may seem like obvious but it's like this show also is not good at like
balancing the screen time that all of the the uh like candidates get and so like vanessa for
instance like everybody was so cool on Vanessa,
the whole,
like time we were watching the episode,
I was in the,
the Rose buddies,
like live threads.
And everybody's like,
Oh,
Vanessa,
she's so boring.
And it's like,
guys,
remember like on episodes where she got to go on dates,
it was actually like,
everybody was very,
very,
very team Vanessa.
It's just,
she doesn't get screen time for a while because it focuses on other stuff.
And so on hometowns, it's like, Oh no, all of these women are like, all of these
relationships are pretty good.
Yeah. Yeah, well, Vanessa, I was reminding myself earlier, Vanessa was the one who when
Corinne got the bouncy castle was like, hey, Nick, like, this looks trashy, and I don't
want a piece of it. And I thought like, good for you, speak in your mind.
I think of all of the contestants remaining, she is the most, and I know this, people bristle at this terminology, and I hope you don't take it as, like, misogynistic or whatever.
Like, it's just, like, a convenient shorthand for archetypes that the show uses, but the wifey, right?
shorthand for archetypes that the show uses but the wifey right yeah um by which i guess i just mean like the um the pure-hearted winner of the show i think i think there's like a assumption
that they will just be like very very um boring disney princess disney princess a really good
way of putting it um and i ended that ain't it that ain't true yeah um no vanessa vanessa's a rich figure yeah a rich figure i don't know
i meant like like rich in the depth sense yeah usa we got character it's just like
but then once it came out it just sounded like i was saying she was wealthy like corinne is yeah or that she was like a buxom she's rich in character like a buxom woman and i was
saying rich figure is a nice way i don't know i don't know why i picked that well i hope she
hears this and a nice little feather in her i i am a rich figure um okay so now they get on separate atvs and they start they start mudding
they start fucking first of all i'm serious like when i was growing up in west virginia and i in
in huntington i this isn't like a um i don't the last thing i ever want to do on any like
podcasts or anything i do is like reinforce negative stereotypes but like you heard about people flipping over atvs and dying because they were like dangerous as
fuck they're huge super super heavy machines that like will topple all on top of you go super fast
it goes super fast so that's the thing like nick was like i've never been on one of these before
and then you start fucking pod racing on them and And it's like, buddy, calm down.
You need to slow the fuck down.
This is dangerous.
Yeah.
So they're kind of racing each other.
And then they both get on the same one.
And they just get wet and wild.
They get wet and wild.
And the whole time, Rachel and Ariel are just like, the faces, y'all.
There's so much concern.
There's a lot of things to
be concerned about watching this show but you all were like concerned about hookworm in like a very
real very severe way yeah i would i had i enjoyed watching the comments in the facebook group
because everybody i mean it's swampy standing water yes and are just, they are lathering up in it.
At a certain point, they get off their ATVs, and they literally roll around in standing water.
They literally roll around.
They, like, get on top of each other and start just fucking making out just full-blown.
And they're, like, splashing each other and rubbing each other's hair in it.
And just grinding and just full-blown shrekking it right then in the swamp.
Griffin pointed out it gets kind of harlequin because Nick takes his shirt off
and they're like mounting each other.
I said Harlequin, but Harlequin in visual
because I'm sure if I was there,
the scent would not be Harlequin.
The scent would be just full blown standing dookie water.
And all of this to say like, I'm a city mouse, you know?
So for me, I see this.
This didn't bother me so much.
Yeah, Griffin's a country mouse
there's a difference between okay okay i've been mudding i've played around in an atv in the mud
not often but like we like uh we went to church with a family that had a farm and so like we would
go mudding on their farm this is the most southern baptist shit you've ever heard in your whole life
but we would but it would be be like dirt that got wet.
That ain't this.
Not swamp.
This is fucking swamp.
Yeah.
This is swamp.
There's mosquitoes everywhere in this place.
And you're macking in there.
It ain't good.
Yeah, that wasn't the end of their date either.
They had an evening ahead of them.
So I don't know how they got cleaned up enough to go on with the day.
I think Raven knew.
I think Raven knew that he was going to go on three other dates.
And so she wanted this permanent Shrek stank just all over him.
So Raven's date, and we know, is going to be pretty emotional.
But it is even extra emotional.
So as we remember from last episode, I think it was,
her dad is a lung cancer survivor,
and she's really excited to bring Nick home because, one,
this is only the second guy she's ever brought home,
and two, like she wasn't sure her dad was going to be around
for her to ever do this again with a guy.
So they show up
and her mom and dad and brother are there and um it it just like oh he had just gotten some results
back yeah and the family like pitches it to her and like kind of like we got some big news while
you were gone and it's like you need to just say it because this is like a lot and they
announced that he had had a scan and he was cancer free and it got y'all it was i was like tearing up
like it was so nick is crying like nick wasn't crying so i saw a lot of people in the i saw a
lot of people in the comments like saying like, wow, Nick's being really awkward right now.
And like,
y'all do you need to,
I'm serious.
Like be critical of him.
Like when he fucks up for real,
take a fucking second and put yourself in his fucking shoes for a second.
Hi,
what's up family?
I've never met before.
Oh,
you just found out that you're not going to die from cancer.
Um,
cool.
Well,
I don't know how to react to that. I'm very happy for you, but I don't know how to react to that i'm very happy
for you but i don't know how to react to that no that's true i did think it was weird when he
clapped but that's just because i'm not no i would i'm not a clapper like i'm a clapper i'm absolutely
a clapper and so like i would be so overjoyed for that person that that might be how it manifests
but like really think about in your mind how it would manifest for you and then maybe take
a fucking second and think about how to like judge that's true nick has done some gooberish shit and
i will be the first one to like jump on him for that but i feel like a few times now like he has
been thrown into like a like a situation that is sort of beyond your average comprehension and i
think we need to be just a little bit more patient with the boy for,
for when he gets in those entanglements.
That's fair.
But then like,
oh man.
And then Raven just has like a private like conversation with her dad and I'm
just losing it,
man.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They talk a lot about how they were worried that she wouldn't have somebody
to walk her down the aisle when she got married.
That her brother or uncle would have to walk her down the aisle.
And then she said, nobody's going to walk me down the aisle.
If it's not you, I'm walking down alone.
And it's like, just like, it's a lot.
It's so fucking sweet.
And it is like heartbreaking and real and miraculously not in a way that felt like
um no like exploitative of this family's like no we're just like yeah i feel like all the families
we like saw them as they were there was no weird like jojo's brothers like posturing like that's a
good point they're almost gonna be a famous person almost always is if not posturing like some level of like well they're just like stepping up to be a fucking dick like like i'm gonna be a famous person almost always is if not posturing like some level of like well they're
just like stepping up to be a fucking dick like like i'm gonna be the overprotective brother like
jade's brother uh who like lost this the season for her yeah um yeah or des's brother or des no
uh oh who was it it was des's brother des's brother brother. Des' brother wasn't... Des had an awful brother. Wasn't very cool, but there was...
Oh, are you thinking of...
Who was the girl...
The sister?
Who was the girl that...
Claire's sister?
Claire's sister was also not super, super into it.
Yeah.
Like, people that are just, like, almost like Jerry Springer, like...
Casey B's brother.
Yeah.
That's who I was thinking of.
Like, I'm gonna throw a huge over the
top fit that's gonna make good television yeah there wasn't any of that it was it all felt like
super super legit this week um and and raven has a nice conversation with her mom where she kind of
admits like i thought nick would be really arrogant but i got to see him with his little sister
and things feel really different
with him than they did with my ex and i've been really guarded um but i feel like this has been
different and the mom says a really kind of a nice thing to the camera says you know of course i'm
worried about her um but you you have to put your heart out there and raven really hasn't been doing that so i'm kind
of encouraged you know that she's doing that with nick um and her dad has a conversation with nick
and basically says like uh nick does ask for permission as nick asks um everybody for for uh
permission to propose to propose um and her father says like if raven is like into you then i have to trust her judgment and so like
if raven says yes then i say yes um yeah i just thought it was i don't know i thought it was nice
i thought it was a nice interaction well and yeah and i noticed the one thing nick nick is using
language like if we decide to get engaged and and she is you know excited to do that is that
something you could support yeah you know so like to do that, is that something you could support?
Yeah.
You know, so like using language that suggests like,
this isn't just my call.
Yeah.
Which is good.
I thought it was a really good date.
But then Raven, who's been talking this whole time
about how she wants to tell Nick,
this is my chance to tell him I'm in love with him.
When it comes down to it, she does not close the deal.
Yeah, I know.
It's one of those things that happens a lot
on hometowns where it's like now's the last chance i need to tell him because what if the other women
are saying it and she she just can't do it she said that she has a hard time showing weakness
and this is like a way that she couldn't bring herself to do it yeah uh so now it's on to dallas for rachel's hometown so this is the week we think rachel
probably goes home right so um because she's been announced as the bachelorette sorry that we're
gonna stop with the spoiler warnings because it's like it's everywhere fucking national news now
rachel is going to be the next bachelorette if you skipped our our spoiler warning last episode
uh we're fucking overjoyed about it.
And they were kind of setting us up like something crazy is going to happen this week.
Yeah, so on the Jimmy Kimmel After Show, he specifically says, so I guess hometowns don't
go so great. And I think she like confirms that yes, the hometowns do not go so great.
Well, and it's kind of anticlimactic. And I'm guessing something came up last minute.
Because for weeks now now they've been setting
up this like her dad's a federal judge what does he want to be called how intense is it going to
be when nick meets him and then nick gets to dallas and immediately we find out her dad's not
going to be showing up because of work related things yeah because he's a federal judge yeah i
mean probably but also like i he doesn't want to be on this tv show a federal judge. Yeah, I mean, probably, but also, like, I don't know.
He doesn't want to be on this TV show.
Yeah, he's a fucking federal judge.
Like, maybe you don't want to be on the TV show.
So they meet in, like, a park, as a lot of people do.
And Rachel doesn't tell him where he's going, but says, you're dressed appropriately.
And then tells us, the viewer, I hope he's got his rhythm together and he's
ready to snap, clap, and stomp.
Y'all, we're going to go to church.
Yes, and not just any church.
We're going to go to Rachel's church.
It is a predominantly black church.
Yes.
Which the show, Nick and Rachel are all very quick to sort of point out.
And it's a Texas-sized church.
It is a super church.
It is a very, very big church.
Yes.
Nick, I think it is fair to say that Nick looks a bit uncomfortable beginning his experience.
Nick, in a very understated way, says, this is a little bit different than my church.
Yes. Nick, in a very understated way, says, this is a little bit different than my church.
Yes.
I actually cackled at that line, just mostly because of the way that he said it.
And I don't know necessarily that it was made any easier in onboarding by the fact that the pastor recognized that Nick was in the audience.
It was very welcoming. It was very welcoming it was very welcoming yes but definitely asked him in front of the whole congregation uh have you been in this space
before and nick's like not in this space no not not in this particular space um everything about
this everything about this uh this this date of of him being taken to Rachel's church.
And like, to be honest, like the whole date was very much about interracial couples and
like the ramifications of Nick dating a black woman and Rachel dating a white man.
And it was, we gave them, credit where credit's due like we gave i gave them
shit like i was like oh i don't trust them as far as i can throw them to handle um something
like this because like straight up and um this is something like i think i'm inherently like uh
cautious to talk about because i'm i'm i'm worried that like me uh like white dude is not gonna like
necessarily know the best way to approach discussing it.
But I feel pretty confident in saying, like, this show has, at best, like, if we're being the most generous to the show, like, has historically pretended that race doesn't exist.
Right? doesn't exist right like i i i think like when a um when like the last person of color is sent
home from a season it is never like even discussed that well there there goes the last person of
color from this season and now it's down to like the final nine white people but are you forgetting
when ben higgins said quote i ain't that white baby you know i'll never forget that for the rest
of my life and i'm not i don't i don't I've, we've talked about stuff like this in the past,
and I have, I don't want to erase, like, Kyla or Juan Pablo, who were.
Or Jojo.
Or Jojo, who was, I think, half Iranian.
Yeah.
But I think there's, I think there's something to
be said and this is something like um we we're gonna have to like learn how to talk about
confidently next season because like I really want to make sure that we do a really good job
discussing this um discussing the ramifications of having a like a black lead in one of these shows, is, is this idea that I really, I really
feel like this show, for the most part, airs on the side of caution, I want to say, and just,
like, pretending that it's just, like, doesn't, doesn't exist is just not, is not a thing.
And so it was, it was surprising, I think, to see this date just be, and so it was, uh, it was surprising,
I think to see this date just be like every scene,
every conversation was about,
uh,
this.
And I think that,
I don't know if you can chalk this up to the show or the people who were on
the date,
but I think it was,
frankly,
I think it was handled pretty well.
Nick,
especially I think was,
uh,
I,
I was worried that he was going to sort of approach
it from the angle of oh i don't see color so it's like is this a predominantly black
congregation i didn't even realize uh he he straight up said like obviously i am not
colorblind and um later rachel is talking to her family about nick and sort of his his approach to to dating
a black woman and she says that he basically said that um as long as there are people out there who
have a problem with like interracial couples like then it is a thing that they should also sort of
recognize and discuss yeah well both of them are very honest in saying like neither of us has had a serious relationship with a person of a different race
before. Right. But we feel very comfortable
talking to each other about it and acknowledging what we like about each other
and how race does or doesn't play a role in our relationship.
And they were both very just candid with each other
and with the family. and it went really well
it went really well like i i i think i think that particular conversation is hard for um
a show like this and people who participate in a show like this to like nail this idea of walking the line between um oh i don't see color and like
either like fetishizing or exploiting it and i i i honestly think and i i'm sure that my i'm sure
everybody's like metric is going to be different for stuff like this but like i think this episode
did a pretty fucking good job yeah um so anyway yes they go on this date and afterwards
they're they're talking about how rachel's like were you uncomfortable in there um and nick says
something like kind of amazing and i saw some people making fun of him in the facebook group
but he said like you know i grew up going to church my whole life and you know amen is amen
i was like that's very that's very eloquent of you, Nick.
I don't know if they will.
Rachel talks about how church is really important to her.
She grew up in a church and she is a religious person.
And I don't know if that's going to be a focus.
I think it's too soon to tell what the focus is going to be.
Can I give you a few cynical interpretations yes absolutely and and this is just this is how griffin and i differ a little bit
um i have a few i have a few thoughts first of all i have a feeling that the producers may have
pushed her yes to put nick in an environment like that yeah Yeah. And so she, I mean, obviously, I'm not doubting her faith in any way, but I am thinking that
she may have been pushed to bring him somewhere that would be predominantly African American.
I don't know that, like, I don't, I think about, like, putting myself in the shoes of
the main bachelor or bachelorette having to go and meet all these families and, like,
I'm pretty good with a family. I'm pretty, i'm pretty good with a family i'm pretty i'm pretty good with a family that is true um being called out in front
of an entire church congregation of of any of any uh predominant race is so terrible being
fuck that being called out in like any large group setting of strangers that is like
yeah large enough like fucking makes my makes my bones dissolve yeah and this was this was
so a lot of people like oh god nick is tapping that thigh right now in this moment it's like
in this moment i do not blame him. Folks like, hey, everybody, please turn your attention to this date.
And he's definitely dating three other women.
And let's see what Revelations has to say about that.
Like, it was, man, it was, this was so much.
This was very much.
But yeah, I mean, Rachel's family seems incredible.
They seemed very similar to Rachel in that they're like, let's talk about it.
You know, let's get it out here.
Let's have a conversation about what it's going to be like for you.
You know, and maybe you two feel comfortable with each other and with this challenge, but you're going to have to deal with other people that may not.
And I think, I mean mean i think it goes well you
know i mean there's this is going to be a challenge for us this upcoming season of of having a
conversation about race in the guise of a show like the bachelor bachelorette that is so produced
that is so carefully edited yes to tell a specific kind of story. So we're going to have our interpretation.
I think the date went well.
I think the date went well.
It obviously was edited in a way to make it go well, because she is the Bachelorette.
She's the Bachelorette.
Yeah.
It went really well, which is weird, because we were told during the Kimmel bit that he
asked, like he specifically said, so I guess the hometowns didn't go very well.
And she said, I think she confirmed it.
And it's like, it actually went really fucking well.
Yeah.
Well, she didn't confirm it.
She was just like kind of shrugged a little bit.
I guess she was kind of like shrugged it off.
Yeah.
She may not.
I mean, we don't know who gets eliminated.
She may not get eliminated.
She may make it another week.
That would be weird since we know she's not going to win.
I know.
Anyway, so specifics about the date she um oh god the funniest the
funniest the funniest sentence that was said out loud was her uh older sister is married to a white
man and he said uh so let's just uh you know be frank and talk about it. You are a white. The phrasing there was so like,
unbelievable. And everybody like laughed it off. Like it was like, I think kind of like a
No, he said, I can't help but notice.
I can't help but notice you are a white.
Yeah, the other thing that happens is Nick talks to his mom for a while, and his mom, or Nick talks to Rachel's mom.
And her mom asks if there are any red flags.
And he says...
He does the job interview thing.
Yeah.
Is it a red flag that I'm so into her and she's too perfect?
Yeah, he's like, I know that she's not, you know, flawless.
But, you know, we communicate so well.
And Rachel's mom's like, well, she has kind of a big personality.
And he's like, well, I like her big personality.
So he never actually says any concerns he has about their relationship.
And then the date is over.
Yeah.
And Rachel doesn't say that she's in love with him.
Has she said it? At the end of the episode, we're trying to take in love with him um has she said it we're at the end
of the episode we're trying to take an inventory of like who said it or not i think vanessa did
last week and corinne's response was not corinne does this week right and raven accidentally said
it a while ago yeah but it was just like i love this about you or one of the things I love about you. And Rachel doesn't say it. And then, so we've just had two very emotional,
like well put together dates of people of great maturity.
And now we're going to Miami with Corinne.
Before we do that, can I steal you away?
Yeah.
I feel like when I am the one that leads us into the Jumbotron breaks,
you're the one that has to give me that home frequency.
Oh, shoot.
Okay.
Do you want to do it again?
Yeah, sure.
Can I steal you away?
Bow, bow, bow, bow, bow, bow, bow, bow.
Bow, now, now.
Ooh.
That was really good, babe.
Thank you.
We had some friends over yesterday
when we were talking about the podcast
and they were like so when are you going to get music
for that part
I guess I don't understand the question
we had some people in the comments
of the last episode they were like I'm tired of the Tim Allen
ugh
and then they were met with the response
of so many great
Tim Allen YouTubes what was the was it the genuine oh my god
with tim allen's um that was i had never seen that before that's inspired um i hadn't seen the
music video before very suggestive genuine you know like very like erotically charged
uh got a jumbotron spot if you want to get a message on
the show you can go to maximumfund.org jumbotron and find out all the info on how to get a show
on it's really a message on it's really easy whoops mixed up some words didn't i this one is
for lauren and it's from robert who says hi bunny you are the best wife anyone could ask for not a
minute goes by where i don't think of you.
Thank you for being so sweet, kind, loving, and always being there to goof around with.
Here's to many, many more years of being Rose Buddies.
Love you always, Robert.
How sweet.
That's really sweet.
It's very straightforward.
I feel like each show that I participate in has sort of a a um like a formula for these jumbo charm messages like
for adventure zone it's a lot of like dnd groups like thanking their dungeon masters for like
leading them through a story and this one it's just like hey straight up i love you i love you
very much can i read the next one as soon as i I find it. Here's one. Got 6% on that phone, so you better hurry.
Okay, this message is for Charlie.
This is from Ryan.
Dear Charlie, I am taking a break from feeding our cool baby just to let you know that I love you.
You are a great mom and wife, and I am lucky to have you in my life.
See, that's what I'm talking about.
That's nice
um what i also like about this is i have to take a break from feet hey baby you stay there for one
second and you we're going to take a break from eating while i send a very important email while
i make a very important advertising purchase maybe this is also very exciting in addition to the
jumbotron spots we have a sponsor this week.
We have an actual sponsor.
We have our first sponsor, and it is Blue Apron.
And Blue Apron, they've sent some copy here.
Look what I'm telling the audience what I'm doing.
He's throwing it away.
Don't need the phone.
Don't need to read copy points off of a...
Well, there might be a link.
Hold on.
I need the link.
Yeah, there's definitely a code
there's probably a code um we we've used blue apron for like a year now and it's like fucking
awesome and i cannot imagine our lives without it um basically for 10 bucks per person per meal
um they send you all the ingredients that you need to make uh uh some really really tasty
stuff you should let me talk about it because you talk about it all the time that you need to make some really, really tasty stuff. You should let me talk about it because you talk about it all the time.
Yeah, you should talk about it.
Go ahead.
So things I love about Blue Apron.
You get produce you wouldn't normally get.
Like I had never bought a tomatillo before.
I had never bought the kind of fish that is called barramundi.
Didn't even know that fish existed.
Did not know.
There are grains so ancient, they are forbidden.
You will not find them at Whole Foods because they are too ancient for Whole Foods.
I'm talking about farro.
The other thing.
Oh, go ahead.
I'm still going.
Please.
The other things that I like about it, when we had the baby, we knew for that month we
were not going to be able to cook meals.
So we just put it on hold
you said don't send us any place didn't have to like cancel any kind of membership just said hey
let's take this month off uh also i will say um our baby has a variety of allergies that mean that
i have to eat differently and so griffin can get in there week to week and pick out meals that are more likely
to work with my dietary needs yeah they have a few meals that you can choose from to get sent
and you can sort of also base it around your own dietary needs or whether you're vegetarian or
vegan or whatever you can um you can pick and choose around it and the food is so good here
are some of the upcoming meals they have things like uh cashew
chicken stir fry with tango mandarins and jasmine rice roasted pork with apple walnut and farro
salad crispy barramundi with quinoa and roasted carrot salad udon noodle soup with miso and soft
boiled eggs a lot of really really good stuff now good news you can check out this this week's menu
and you can get your first three meals for free with
free shipping by going to blueapron.com slash rose.
That is the hyperlink.
And we have secured rose.
Thank you, Blue Apron, for this gift.
It's seriously amazing.
We I feel like I'm always very enthusiastic, which I'm worried makes me sound like a shill.
But like, I learned how to fucking cook blue apron and it feeds me like
several times a week.
And it is like,
I think just the absolute best stuff.
And it's a great thing to do when you're watching the bachelor.
Yeah,
sure.
Again,
it's blue apron.com slash Rose.
Let's get back into it.
Okay.
Hello and welcome to pod phone.
What type of podcast are you looking for?
You have chosen funny podcasts about bad movies.
Rated R.
May we recommend The Flophouse?
Three friends talk about bad movies and make each other and you laugh.
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If you download it right now or whenever.
Rated R. To purchase tickets to The Flophouse.
You don't need to do that.
Just download it.
The Flophouse.
Rated R.
For nudity, I guess.
Miami.
Welcome.
She actually, the recording corn says welcome to miami and i just i broke into
the will smith song in my head you know that one hey were you down with big willie style or like
what's your even like what was your will smith era because i know we have some differences in
terms of like the generational just drop my phone generational okay not generational but that's a
little excessive half you know a few
years divide and so like for you i don't know maybe it's parents don't just don't understand
but for me it was big willie style what are you asking what's your will smith era what's your
favorite smith oh yeah um i mean fresh prince is really where i got to know him that's where we all
got to know him but i think that music and then Men in Black is probably where I really grew to love him.
Okay, so you got on the ground floor of the Fresh Prince.
Did you enjoy his music back then?
Were you like, parents just don't understand in summertime?
I mean, probably I enjoyed his music, but I didn't seek it out.
I didn't own any of it. You didn't like the feel-good, no-cuss vibe?
Because I liked his no-cuss vibe.
Because it's hard to hear that stuff in music.
It's challenging to hear it, the cussing.
I didn't really think about that part very much.
I'd like to see some of these hip-hop artists write one verse without a curse.
That's a Will Smith quote from one of his songs.
I also liked him in Independence Day.
He was very good in Independence Day.
Yeah, great.
He's great in every movie.
So, Hancock.
Never saw that.
I think that song was about Eminem.
He was singing about Eminem.
And he was like, I'd like to see Eminem write one verse without a curse.
Well, you know, Eminem called him out.
Oh, did he?
Eminem said Will Smith doesn't have to cuss in his records.
Well, I do.
So F him and F you too.
Well, I feel like there's an element of truth to that, don't you think?
Eminem hates cussing so much because we all do.
Like I cut.
Hi, folks.
This is Griffin.
I cuss on this podcast sometimes.
I don't want to, but it's like I know people like expect it and like love it.
It's like my.
I'm like the Will Smith of this podcast.
You're basically the Will Smith of this podcast.
Because I very rarely cuss.
But when you do it, it's the fucking best thing ever in the world.
Rachel cusses like once a month.
And when she does, it is like, I'm shocked.
It makes me jealous because I cuss
so much.
We've been doing a lot of interviews for the
MBM TV show,
which launches this Thursday on CISO.
Go check it out.
We did an interview with TV Guide and reading
my quotes, every single one of them is
like expletive deleted. And it's like, oops, sorry,
TV Guide. Didn't even realize when I was talking to you tv guide interviewer that i was like
cussing up a storm what happened to you griffin where does that come from okay so i swear in
because your brothers don't do that i guess not but like in middle school i started to realize
like man i'm cussing a lot and it's because like I hung out with like a bunch of kids who just cussed a whole bunch.
And I feel like it was kind of tough for me to walk it back from, and I wouldn't do it
around like the family.
Were you in the like preteen Navy?
Yeah, I was in the preteen Navy.
I was in the J, J-R-O-T-C.
No, I don't know.
I just like, I just like, I cussed like a lot during middle school.
Because like everybody that I was like friends with at my middle school was just like hard,
hard cussing folks.
And you know, whatever you do in middle school, you have to take with you the rest of your
life.
I mean, maybe not, but it kind of stuck.
Can we spend some time in Miami now?
Please, let's go to Miami.
I just want to say I love Will Smith's whole ethic.
Wouldn't it be great if he was the musical act on their day oh god it's a shame we didn't get to see that it's like
what even song like what song even would he do pitbull what if it had been pitbull i mean pitbull
was probably playing a concert somewhere nearby i'm sure if you like dialed up the the decibels
on like one of the scenes where they're out in the open, you could pick up a concert happening somewhere.
So Corinne meets Nick at a,
a quote exclusive mall in Miami.
And they are going to go on a little shopping trip together.
Corinne knows a lot of the retail workers in this mall on a first name basis. And so she enters the store
and Nick says it's like Christmas for a lot of these individuals. And they are they are trying
on stuff. Corinne is telling us that your your dressing room is your holy ground, you bring stuff
in there, you find somebody, and you just try everything on and you can,
you can make decisions in the dressing room.
She's getting champagne.
The dressing room is your holy place.
Yeah.
She says over and over again.
Oh,
I wrote down holy ground,
holy ground.
Well,
regardless it's holy.
They're,
they're drinking champagne.
They're trying things on.
Nick tries on a sweatshirt that he says costs $650. Well, he tries on sweatpants and he's like, uh, they're, they're drinking champagne. They're trying things on. Nick tries on a sweatshirt that he says costs $650.
Well, he tries on sweatpants and he's like, uh, Corinne, I'm trying on $800 sweatpants,
but it's okay because the sweatshirt is only $650.
Um, and he tells the camera if Corinne and I end up together, I might have to get a few
more jobs.
Um, this whole day, like, okay.
I feel like we need to talk about
Korn is getting a different edit now.
She is no longer getting the villain edit.
And that is the edit that she has been getting.
Full stop.
Like, you cannot deny that shit.
And this sequence was so, like, fucking...
It was like 80s movie montage. It was, like, clueless. Like, it was, like, fucking... It was like 80s movie montage.
It was, like, clueless.
Like, it was, like, seriously.
It was, like, a fun, let's go, like, Robin Sparkles, let's go to the mall.
Like, come on, we're going clothes shopping.
Don't worry about it.
It's, like, dressing room, thumbs up, thumbs down.
Yeah.
It's Daddy's Amex.
Don't worry about it.
Yeah.
Like, straight up movie montage and it was
like and then they went out to like get lunch or something afterwards and it was sorry gang
kind of cute like it was getting it was a complete tonal shift from this woman is all she does is
fight with the other woman in the house and she she has a nanny how how crazy
how privileged is that yeah and i think you bring up a good point in that it could have been edited
very differently because so she buys nick some clothes at least that's how they make it look
and they spend over three thousand dollars on just like a shirt and pants and a nice pea coat
i think um yeah and not that that makes it like pea coats should not cost three thousand dollars
and um this is in the context of the other women who have had very kind of like emotional serious
dates uh and vanessa who's about to have like a very mature date too.
And so they could have edited to make Corinne seem just flat out gross because they're spending all this money.
They're going shopping.
Corinne's not revealing really any kind of depth that we didn't already see in her.
But instead they just make it look like they're having a good time.
Yeah.
They're just having fun.
Which kind of confers my suspicion that Corinne's not not like an evil person like she's done she's definitely done
some stuff that's like she's she's privileged but she's privileged but like i i think she's just
like kind of young and like pretty goofy and also we didn't talk about this um i've also talked
about how i i suspect that the women in the house don't hate Korn in the way that the TV show wants us to believe that they do.
And during Jimmy Kimmel, when Rachel came out and announced that she was going to be the Bachelorette,
Jimmy asks her about Korn and is like, was she just miserable to be around?
And Rachel's like, I love Korn.
I'm team Korn.
And like everybody around the house liked her too.
I really don't think she's that bad of a
person she puts her foot in the mouth in her mouth like a lot and um i think yeah i think it's fair to
say that she is a privileged person although i also think like the show fucking played that shit
up like as much as is humanly possible see the character of raquel in like every episode leading up to this one, which is,
I don't want to excuse like the,
the genuinely like yucky stuff that she said and did throughout this,
the season.
But like this kind of made it like evident that she's not like an awful,
like evil person.
It's just like,
that is who the show needed her to be.
And now just like that,
it's fun. Like, let's go shopping. Like, and then the show needed her to be. And now, just like that, it's fun, like,
ha ha ha, let's go shopping.
And then the show, because we are
in, like, the venerable final
four, she is
like, just a good, fun
person.
So she tells Nick
on their date that she loves him.
They're out at the restaurant.
Not that she does love him. she loves him uh they're out at the restaurant and not that she does love him
she loves him yeah she does this like really weird pause where she's like um they're sitting
at their at the restaurant table and she's like you know i just i really really fell for you and i
dot dot dot dot dot love you i think i'm fine with that i'm fine with that i like that i like that
better than i do love you i do love you i do love you so after they have their meal it is time
to go meet daddy uh nick asks do you call him dad or daddy and she's like daddy of course and i'm
like oh that's weird literally the next shot is her dad talking to her mom.
And it's just like, oh, let's see what daddy has to think of Nick.
And it's like, you can't call yourself that.
Yeah, you figure out quickly why Corinne refers to herself in the third person all the time.
There's a lot of referring.
You learn a lot about why Corinne is the way that she is during this day.
There's a lot of referring to learn a lot about why corinne is the way that she is during this day there's a lot of referring to yourself in the third person um there's a lot of just eating the
biggest just like wettest olives i've ever seen in my whole life uh yeah so it's corinne's dad
her mom her sister and you guessed it raquel her adult nanny. And this is very clearly just like a chance for Corinne to be like,
this is totally normal. This is totally normal that this woman is my nanny. And so the family
addresses it very quickly at the top, because Corinne says the women think it's weird that I
have an adult nanny. I'm so torn. Because like, I don't't know i don't know how i i don't know how i feel
there's a lot of unknowns right well so here's here's what the mom says the mom says well
raquel's part of our family she's been with us for 17 years she's like a second mom to you guys
which is what i thought okay well maybe this is a woman that has actually helped raise them yes
yeah i mean she's a nanny that's what nannies
do that's why you hire a weird thing is that is she is still doing things for corinne that corinne
clearly does not need help well i mean at this point i think they still use the short hand
this woman no this woman is still making her bed that is that is the issue i mean that's what like
um that's i think that's what a live-in, I don't know what the right terminology is.
It is a very intimate, very sweet relationship that Raquel has with this family.
Nick, Corinne goes off to have a conversation with her dad, which we'll talk about.
Nick, the first person he has a conversation with that we see is Raquel.
And Raquel talks about
how she loves corinne and she grew up raising corinne and she's very very protective of corinne
and it was really sweet like it was it was it didn't feel inauthentic in any way she says i
treat corinne like i treat one of my own children i guess the issue more is not that Corinne has somebody that is providing her with this help, but that everything about Corinne suggests that she is immature.
And that this is just another example of her not doing things that most adults do.
Right. example of her not doing things that most adults do right so it's less about raquel and the fact
that she has an adult nanny and more like this is symptomatic of her making choices that reflect
that she is behaving a little bit younger than than you would hope for i just feel like i feel
like this show has been like gross about raquel not in this show has been, like, gross about Raquel, not in...
This show has been gross about Raquel because it treated Raquel as a character trait of Korn's,
which is she has an adult nanny.
There's that whole fucking thing about how she has a new nanny now at wherever they were at.
St. Thomas's place? St. Elmo's Fire?
She's got a new nanny now. And, oh, my old nanny's going nanny's gonna be jealous it's like oh that's not how any of that works but like the whole time raquel was
treated as this like character deficiency of corinne's like raquel was this like living
embodiment of corinne's entitlement that's fair yeah um and i feel like a lot of people kind of
ran with that like in the viewership of the show
and she kind of became a running joke and like we've said this in past episodes it's not like
this is a real person this is a real person who like um has got has has been sort of uh
treated as a prop by this show which sucks um and it's it's kind of hard to divorce divorce
like how this show has treated her with the fact that like she's a real person and she's like she
seems so fucking sweet and they all love each other they all seem to really love each other
like a lot i don't i don't i don't know i we do get a scene though i mean there's something to
be said for saying that someone you've hired to take care of you is like family and then still letting them clean up after you when you all eat dinner together, which is what we see on the show, which is a little uncomfortable to watch.
Yeah, sure.
But okay, anyway, let's talk about Corinne and her dad.
Yeah, there's a lot there.
Her dad does make everybody eat olives because
they're they are a i don't know why i didn't piece this together olympios i think is their
last name like greek like fiercely greek family uh as evidenced by the fact that her dad was like
eat these fucking olives he like marinates his own marinates his own olives and you will eat them and
you will love them yeah they do this thing i would have left i would have been like and i'm
driven and i do not like olives it would have been awful especially these big fucking plump ass eyeball ass olives that
they had them snacking on these fucking little honeydew melon sized olives no thank you they do
this thing in hometowns where everybody has to go off into separate rooms and talk to their family
members and it's supposed to give us a chance guess, to see how they're all really taking in what is happening. And they do this thing where people always have to go into
bedrooms and sit on beds to talk. And it always feels weird to me, but it felt especially weird
when Corinne and her dad both get in bed together to talk about...
I mean, not under the covers. Yes, I agree with you. But yeah, it's weird.
It's weird.
They're like laying in bed talking about Nick.
And her dad is so concerned about, is Nick going to be able to provide for you?
Are you comfortable with being the breadwinner for this family when Nick is the, quote, stay-at-home mom in a relationship?
Yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck.
And Corinne basically says, like, yeah, I'm'm fine with that i'm fine with being the
the sole provider for this for this unit i would enjoy that um there's a there's a lot
in this date and in the date with vanessa's family there's a lot of talk about like
nick's future and it's like yeah the dad's kind of dad out a little bit. The dad's dad out, but there's also like, as me, Griffin, the longtime fan of this franchise, I can say like, we have like 25 pretty solid empirical, evidential examples of what his future is going to be.
what his future is going to be.
And it's,
it's going to be like,
he bases a career off being on this television show,
which is like,
I'm not saying that to be crass.
It's like you were on a gigantic monolithic Disney owned television show for a while. Like it's pretty good setup.
Um,
like we,
we have an idea of like what his life is going to be like after the show.
Maybe he might write a book and may do okay.
Otherwise, he's going to, like, sell things on Instagram and be successful there.
Yeah.
Or maybe he'll be on more episodes of this show and get some money there.
Maybe he'll host an after show for this show.
But, like, he's a media personality now.
And there's, like, I don't know.
It's weird to me, this conversation of, like, well, Nick's not going to do anything after this.
Like, he'll do something.
He was on a major television show.
You know what I think is interesting?
Is that, so Corinne is a business owner, a business...
It's not clear.
I don't know.
But anyway, that's what's weird to me, is that she could be promoting the hell out of her business.
And, you know, quote, be on it for the wrong reasons.
But it could be good for her
her brand or whatever let's figure this out right now and she hasn't ever talked about what she does
we've been going so long this episode and that's a shame because i'm so tired what do you think
corinne does let's lock this shit down right now i mean i think we could find out if we googled i'm pretty sure the information's out
there um oh do you think it's olives do you think it's an olive based sort of no
and what if it's all of you and it's come on
what if it's uh uh there's okay so it's two things olive there's olive branch and that is
that they sell the olives right but then they take the leftover brine and then they turn it
into cosmetics and lotions and the fancy oils for the skin and that's all of you and then that's how
you get that fucking under the tuscan sun just like greek that fucking gutsopolis skin you know what i mean i mean i like that i think that's
sexy i love that and it lends itself to instagram uh but i will i think it's more like i don't know
more focused on like machinery parts for a wholesale farm equipment like nothing particularly like yeah exotic have
you seen the machine they use to harvest olives off an olive tree no google that shit tell me
about it it's like a fucking um it like rolls up to the olive tree and these two arms come out like
grab the olive tree and then it basically an upside down like an inverted umbrella like unwraps and then
these two arms just shake the shit out of the olive tree and all the olives fall out into the
umbrella which i've seen pictures it's like fucking really cool huh it's really cool maybe
they do that maybe maybe maybe that's their we're being a little racist, I guess, assuming that this Greek family company is sold.
He does present olives that he made.
He's very olive-obsessed.
I don't know what to say.
It's not like we just said,
oh, they're Greek, they must like olives.
They literally eat olives that he made on the show.
He's the pride of a person who harvested,
who grew and nurtured and loved these olives.
He also presents 15-year single malt scotch.
With big ice cubes in it.
Yeah, that's kind of weird.
I'm not like a scotch.
I'm not even like a heavy liquor dude, but I know, like, that's not right.
And so Corinne's dad asked Nick the same thing he asked Corinne, which is basically like, are you going to be able to provide for my daughter?
But before Nick really answers, he says, because Corinne believes that you can. And Nick's like,
well, I'm glad to hear her say that. And that's kind of how it ends. He doesn't really ever
confirm or deny. And so then he asked the question that he asked all the dads, which is, if Corinne's into this and we want to get engaged, could you support it?
And the dad says, you know, if I know Corinne is happy, that's good enough for me.
And if you can be happy with her.
And that's about it.
Yeah.
and uh that's about it yeah she corinne's dad does tell us the viewer that she he thinks that corinne is the lid to nick's pot which i couldn't decide as a feminist woman how i felt about that
but i mean it seemed like a sweet a sweet thought i don't know i've seen so many fucking commercials
for beauty and the beast watching this show that I thought of it like,
I'm Mr. Lidsworth.
And I'm Mrs.
Well, Mrs. Potts is actually a character in the show.
And that's the end of their date.
That's the end of their date.
Let's move on to the final date with Vanessa.
Now we're going to Montreal.
That's not it.
They go to Montreal.
Yeah, but you hit that T.
Like, they say the T. Montreal yeah but you hit that T like they say the T
Montreal
you barely hit that T
you tickled that T
I think my pronunciation
is
we need our Bachelor Canada friends
by the way speaking of Bachelor Canada friends
Jasmine posted the most wonderful video
the most wonderful Instagram of her
and Kevin
Kyle no Kevin wonderful video most wonderful instagram of her and uh kevin kyle kyle kevin no kevin
sorry we wanted it to be kyle no it's kevin i would i like kevin uh her and kevin on a helicopter
and just a bunch of just knees just a bunch of she said this is for my rose buddies they know
exactly what we need what we need is those canadian. They go to Montreal. Montreal.
They go to Montreal.
And a lot of y'all forgot about Vanessa, and she shows up with some fucking heat.
She does.
So she reminds us that she is a teacher, and we are going with Nick to meet her students.
Nick, she was a special needs teacher.
She talks about how she is a teacher of adult special needs students who are all uh over 21 yeah um and they surprise her with like a big um a big greeting
um in yeah they're all standing out in the hallway and they're all holding roses every immediately
everybody is crying like everybody and everybody's crying yeah she she has a lot
of big fans at that school and she flipped they'd go to a classroom and uh she takes all of her
students and she flips into the most hardcore teacher mode like it is literally like she was
bitten by a teacher and then a full moon came about and she was just like okay so we are going to talk about like yeah they're gonna make
um so if you remember in the first episode her students made a scrapbook for her to give nick
now uh they're gonna make a scrapbook of her and nick's adventures together uh and she uses it as
an opportunity like a teaching moment for them.
And it's just, it's really nice.
She seems like a really good teacher.
It seems like she's got a really good rapport
with her students.
Do you want to point out
that they make a little tableau
of their zero G flight date
and Nick leads off with saying like,
so basically they fly us right up next to outer
space and that's what makes the zero gravity and i wanted to be like but you know that's not how
they like fly in like a specific like parabolic arc that makes you like free fall and it's not
you're in outer i mean fly this plane to outer Like, if they could do that, NASA would just do that. You get that, right, Nicholas?
Nick hits it off particularly with Kevin, which is one of Vanessa's students.
Kevin does tell Nick that he is lucky to be with Vanessa.
Yeah.
Which we all kind of feel.
Yeah, we all.
I don't think there's a person alive that doesn't agree with Kevin's analysis.
I feel like this, it was all very, like, it was really sweet.
And it was really, I think it would have been easy to come off, like, really exploitative.
And I really don't, I really feel like it was, I feel like it was super sweet.
And it was, like, just like Vanessa saying, like, this is what my day-to-day is like.
These are the people who are really important to me.
And these are the, like, people who I see every single day.
Yeah, no, it's not like there's, like, a lot of high-fives and a lot of, like, aren't you just the best?
Like, it's just people. But I wouldn't trust this show if you had told me that, like, they were going to go on a date and we were going to meet her the students in her her special needs like class i wouldn't have trusted this show with that like
experience right and but like it not only was it um really sweet it also like i feel like i learned
a lot more about vanessa and we don't get that from like hometowns where it's like i want to
show you my football field high school football field where I threw all my touchdowns.
Well, it says something to the quality of the women.
The women are just so fucking good, guys.
Yeah.
So after they go to the classroom, Vanessa says, we're going to first go to my mom and
her side of the family and then to my dad's side because her parents are divorced and so
they go to her mom's first and there are quote and this is vanessa saying this 15 loud italians
which include uh some of her friends her grandparents uh some of the kids of her
siblings her aunts there her mom's there it is a big old group the choice
of music that the bachelor makes by the way for this scene i didn't even notice oh my god is it
like if there had been like a fucking scene in like the rescue rangers cartoon where they break
into like a a pizzeria like that straight up like really hitting that that hitting that concertina
like full full bore like that is that is basically i didn't even notice i was looking more at the
food on the table which was all very like pasta oriented yeah uh and some of vanessa's family
members actually like her grandparents, actually speak Italian.
Like, this is no joke.
Italian family.
And they have a lot of conversations on a mint green couch with the different...
I would have said pistachio.
Pistachio.
That's good.
I think more of a mint. I would say mint. Well, I agree to disagree. We don't have to have a fightachio. Pistachio, that's good. I think more of a mint.
I would say mint.
Well, I agree to disagree.
We don't have to have a fight about everything.
So Nick has a conversation with Vanessa's mom, and I really love this because this happens a lot with The Bachelor.
Vanessa's mom's like, what did you like about Vanessa?
And Nick, just thinking he's the cutest thing ever, says, when she got out of the limo, I liked her right away.
And her mom is like, no.
No.
Vanessa has a lot to offer.
It's insufficient.
The tenor of the conversation basically for this entire date was, you do not deserve our angel daughter.
I know she's attractive.
Everybody's going to say she's attractive.
Nick, I don't need to hear that.
I need to hear why you appreciate the fact that she is an exceptional woman.
I love when families are like, yes, of course,
our family member who you are trying to court is a perfect human being.
The perfect human being.
What are you doing here you clown like every
single person was like i just feel like you're gonna destroy you're gonna destroy her perfect
record of being a perfect human being yeah her sister also kind of leans into nick and says hey
you guys live in two literal different countries have you talked about what's going to happen next and nick's like well
not yet and her sister's like well you better get there um vanessa is somebody who puts her
happiness aside for relationships and i'm scared for her uh and nick um nick understands like this
is a big deal uh because they are really leaning into him on it and there's a lot of like there's a lot of
alluding to vanessa's horrible breakup whatever it was before this show i don't remember they
probably talked about it at some point i just i don't know but her whole family acts as if they
really had to put her back together after that was over. And they are not looking forward to having to do that again
if Nick doesn't follow through.
We also get some scenes with
what I guess is her brother?
I wasn't 100% sure.
It was a huge family
and they introduced all of the family
in like four seconds.
So I don't exactly remember.
The brother has a lot of look.
It's a cool look.
It's worth checking out.
It's the kind of look I wish I could have pulled off
when I was his age.
Yeah. There is a gold chain involved lot of look. It's a cool look. It's worth checking out. It's the kind of look I wish I could have pulled off when I was his age. Yeah.
There is a gold chain involved.
Good look.
And, yeah, one thing that Vanessa's sister says to her, which I think is very wise, is,
do you know what Nick is planning on doing after this?
And I thought that is a really clever way of asking that question of like like what happens after the show how is nick going to leverage this experience to go on to
his professional life like which again i also real question it's a real question but i also think we
know the answer to that because you can look at so many other like people who have done it like
it would can you imagine how wild it would be if it was just like and here's my real estate my realtor who sold me my house it's nick from the bachelor
remember him who is your our waiter looks so familiar tonight it's nick from the bachelor like
he's gonna keep doing bachelor yeah but there's something about hearing him say it like really
copping to it of like uh oh i'm just gonna leverage this to
sell energy drinks it's just like no no shade i don't i don't think there's any shame in that
no shade but it's what you do you're a media personality it takes some courage to just be
honest that that is what you're planning on doing yeah especially if you are getting ready to get
engaged to somebody who teaches adults with special needs, like does a very like noble, heroic thing.
And you're saying, I'm going to use my Instagram account to sell products.
Yeah.
There's just there's a difference between those two careers.
Chosen.
Yes.
Yeah.
So those are the dates.
Oh, and then we also go talk to her dad.
Oh, yeah.
The day.
Okay.
I forgot about that.
Oh, and then we also go talk to her dad.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
I forgot about the dad.
So we go to talk to Vanessa's dad.
And Vanessa is a little apprehensive about this.
Yeah.
So this was the opposite of her mom's side of the family, who is like this huge Italian family.
This was just her dad and i guess stepmom um and uh really all we
most most of the time we have here is spent with nick asking for her father's permission uh and
holy shit does it not go great yeah he so nick asks and the dad is hesitant and then also makes nick relive the multiple times
that he has already done this with other people's fathers yeah like he is the the several times like
whenever they are talking about like their relationship uh vanessa's dad is just like
but you said this to everybody else right like Like, you've said this to three other dads in the last, like, couple weeks.
Oh, and Nick tries to hedge.
He's like, yeah, in a way.
I mean, I ran it by them.
And he's like, is it a yes or no question?
Did you run it by them?
You know, we brought it up.
We decided to table the conversation, ultimately.
And so the dad asks what his blessing would mean and and like if nick were to
have kids like what what he would want from like somebody who's asking for his heavy stuff yeah
heavy stuff and and it seems like the dad is not going to give his blessing which is like okay i
get it and nick seemed to get it and then all of a sudden
he's the dad out of nowhere is like so i do give my blood i give you my blessing
which it was like wait what what happened here you just want to like put the put the
irons to him for like end the conversation yeah just like get out uh yeah so it goes okay with
vanessa's family i would say like it is definitely the coolest reception that he receives from, from all
of the, the, the hometown families.
Um, and then we get a cut of him back in New York, uh, and all of the women sort of returning
and sort of giving their spiels.
Raven saying she's-
Oh, wait, before-
Oh boy.
Before we get there though oops vanessa gets upset
because vanessa realizes that nick has asked all the dads for blessings which like this is another
thing that i'm like vanessa yeah we were like haven't you seen the show before any season of
this show before of course he does yeah um yeah so they go back to new york and the women all show
up and everybody's having their own
like recapping their own sort of experience raven's nervous because she didn't say i love you
so is rachel vanessa is is starting to get upset because she has put all her feelings out there
and has gotten nothing back yet from nick so yeah there's a lot of angst uh and then so we see
vanessa like walking into the hotel and we think
like she's about to go have a confrontation with nick because we see like some some legs walking
towards the door and then a knock on the door nick answers it and it's andy who gives him a
like a chilly hello nick like a full-blown jerry seinfeld hello newman and then cut to black andy okay
andy was the bachelorette like three or four bachelorettes ago and that was the first season
yeah the first one to reject nick uh and nick was her runner-up and she ended up going with
josh who you may remember from bachelor in paradise yeah it did not work out no because he sucks um and so i don't
know and then during the after the final rose for andy season that is when nick uh outed that they
had had sex and she didn't pick him and how how dare she make love to him and not end up marrying
him and it was really gross and shitty uh and now here she is yeah so i don't know
if we're supposed i mean maybe we're supposed to think that she like wants to reconcile or resolve
some kind of feelings but i'm really thinking it's another one of the old bachelor like hey
good luck out there here's some advice from my experience that i want to impart to you that's
what i'm expecting yeah no it's like, it's like a twist that plays well
on paper. It is like a, we need something
for the end of the
Hometowns episode. What if we got
Andy to show up? Hey, Andy, will you be in our show?
She's like, yeah, I guess so.
I don't really know what I'm going to say. I really think
it's going to be before the first commercial break.
It will be resolved. And it will be Andy
saying, you know, I'm sorry about how things turned out,
but I really want the best.
Yeah, exactly.
The preview for next week made it seem like their conversation was very chilly.
It would be cool if that's how it actually turned out, because I do think the way that it broke down in that after the final rose was fucking super shitty.
But I'm pretty certain it will be like, you know want i think it's time for you to find love
yeah and then we get a lot of um a lot of previews of him out in the snow in a suit
kneeling with this in a prayer and his face is very wet yeah my prediction i think i gotta believe
rachel goes home this like i can't imagine them taking rachel to like final three and we know that she's not gonna win it like that's
wild yeah i mean or it could be corinne and rachel gets one more week two more weeks maybe because
we don't know how like the rose ceremonies are gonna yeah break down i don't know i don't know
um but i'm pretty sure final two i don't know i don't know if corn's gonna make it it would be pretty um
pretty pretty unexpected if she makes it to the final no it seems like it has to be
vanessa and raven they're both just doing so good um so yeah that was hometowns just a really good
as evidenced by the fact that we've gone so long yeah there's a lot there's just a lot to talk
about and like all of the dates were like um there was a lot of like there were a lot of really genuine moments there was like a lot of
development for all of like the contestants still left on the show i feel like it was a pretty good
episode for nick um uh there was a lot of you know the the tried and true sort of like um gotta get gotta get daddy's permission um but uh like i i really feel like it
was a really good episode like i don't know if if this whole season had been as like genuine as this
i don't think i would have had as big a problem as i did with sort of the the mid section of it
yeah um but yeah it was really good and now i'm really interested to see where it goes like i'm interested in how it's gonna wrap up now um that's it right yeah thank you to everybody who
um is on the facebook group and go and join the rose buddies facebook group it's
a real fun place to be i'm like so tired that i'm actually having trouble
forming words thank you to ariel who actually is um watching henry right
now because he woke up thank you executive producer ariel we will make sure you get your
imdb credit for this one uh we haven't been to the po box in a little while so if you sent us
something don't don't fret please don't be upset at us probably still sitting there it's a lot
i uh i am going back to work this week. I am going back to work this week.
You're just going back to work this week?
It's going to be weird that we're not going to be in the same house
that we've been in for three months together.
Yeah.
So, yes, that is the episode.
Thank you all very much for listening.
Thank you to Maximum Fun for having us.
Go to MaximumFun.org.
Check out all the shows there.
They're really great.
Mabimbam, the podcast I do, we have a TV show that comes out on Thursday on CISO.
You can go to CISO.com or go to CISO's YouTube page.
You can watch one of the episodes for free.
I'm really happy with it.
I may or may not be in a very, very short moment as a pregnant woman.
It's a bummer.
You had some good stuff
in that scene was a big fan of my acting ability i did not make very much time on the show hey
that wasn't my fault don't blame me you know who should i blame i don't know hollywood hollywood
holly weird right like what do they even do out there i hear a lot of people talking about
chipotle and it's like hollywood what do you even do out there you hear a lot of people talking about chipotle and it's like hollywood
what do you even do out there you know uh-huh a lot of people talk about jamba juice and it's like
the left coast you know what i mean yeah yeah it's like what even is a jamba juice so the those
those celebutants celebutants like who paris hilton paris huh it's like 1999 yeah it's like i hear a lot of
people talking about nicole richie these days and i'm like lionel's kid my buddy lionel lionel's
kid it's like holly weird shield grown up now yeah it's like a lot of people are like all talking
about brooke shield and it's like wow Holly weird so anyway Beverly Hills so
I guess you know what I mean I'm just waiting for you to finish the show I can keep going on
this Holly weird rant for a while I want to go to bed I'm me too it's very late anyway thanks
for listening to Rose buddies I'm Griffin McElroy I'm Rachel McElroy when you're ready
stay with us on this journey of joy.
Spoiler alert!
She is up with Soulja Boy.
Right reasons.
Right reasons.
All four seasons.
I'm Biz.
And I'm Teresa. And we host the weekly
comedy podcast One Bad Mother.
We celebrate our moments of parenting genius.
As well as our failures.
Just like, we're going to have hot dogs.
And I'm like, no, we're having fun.
Everybody loves hot dogs.
Yeah.
And it just like smashes that thing right on my chest.
And then I'm just crying in the middle of like kids space while people are like literally dancing with their children.
Parenting can be sad and painfully funny at the same time.
So join us each week as we admit that this is hard, but we're getting really good at it.
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