Wonderful! - Ep. 74: Horse Poop Censorship

Episode Date: June 7, 2017

This week's episode of The Bachelorette featured a lot of fun dates and a lot of super-not-fun horseshit back at the mansion. Not literal horse shit, mind you -- we all know this franchise is too afra...id to actually deliver on THOSE goods. MaxFunDrive ends on March 29, 2024! Support our show now by becoming a member at maximumfun.org/join.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Maybe you should go and do some contemplating. Right reasons, right reasons, being a good girl for all the right reasons. Right reasons, right reasons, being a good girl for all the right reasons. I'm the Bachelorette and I'm rapping to your poolside. Here to find true love. Hi, this is Rachel McElroy. Hello, this is Griffin McElroy. And this is Rose Buddies.
Starting point is 00:00:21 On this podcast, we talk about a television show that you've probably never heard of before. It's called Star Trek Deep Space Nine. What if, though? How much do you think you could bust out right now about DS9? Is that the one Bakula's on? No, babe. No, babe. There was a few other Star Treks until he came around and fixed sci-fi forever.
Starting point is 00:00:42 Is that the one that... i don't know anything about these days nine i'm sorry i don't know why i brought that up um so we're gonna talk about the bachelorette it's a television show where people kiss and hug and they talk and they go on dates and eat food and they look at each other and they find true love well that true love i'm talking about that true love. That's not the name of the song. But I was doing like a weird-out parody of it. Instead of real love, you were saying true love?
Starting point is 00:01:15 Yeah. Here's the thing a lot of people don't know about parody is it doesn't have to be explicitly humorous. Oh. Yeah, you can just like change one word. From the Latin, paradigm. Yeah, which means interesting. Yeah, but not really, but not necessarily just like this. This segment is paradigm. It's interesting. It's not very funny. You can just change out a word like, I wish you would step back from that cusp, my friend.
Starting point is 00:01:45 And then. That's nice. And that's a parody. Yeah, synonymous. The more synonymous, the better. Yeah. It's fun. Language is fun.
Starting point is 00:01:54 You know. Sometimes we talk about people kissing and extremely, exceedingly problematic television behavior. And sometimes we just talk about the nuance of conversation. Everybody these days is just using emojis. Me, I love the words. I keep it classic with the words. What would the emoji look like for parody? I don't know, babe.
Starting point is 00:02:20 I'm so tired. I'm tired of this bit. We just, I haven't had anything to drink for this recording. I'm feeling completely fucking laser'm tired of this bit. We just, I haven't had anything to drink for this recording. I'm feeling completely fucking laser focused. One day sober. Yeah. I mean, I did need those beers to get through the show last night. But we just had a big steak dinner for Blue Apron.
Starting point is 00:02:38 And holy shit, it's hitting me like I just drank a bottle of wine. I'm feeling like I'm just sinking into the floor because of all that just steak, all that red meat just in my belly, weighing me down. Anyway, let's make some jokes. Okay. Episode three. We are picking up where DeMario left us, which is at the edge of the bachelorette property, wanting to know if he can get another chance. At the end of that very long and very wet driveway, always wet forever. So all the guys file out of the house to watch this confrontation take place. Which is so like, it's like The Walking Dead. They all emerge literally simultaneously, which nobody in this house, there's a hundred of them.
Starting point is 00:03:22 Nobody does anything simultaneously unless you are called out by somebody to come do it the first 10 minutes of the show is the most artifice per like frame that this show has maybe ever produced they all are actually not all of them but i would say 98 of them stand approximately 11 feet from rachel and demario yeah and they basically can overhear the conversation they're that close uh and chris harrison is just like there for there's a lot of times in this episode where chris harrison was just like fucking there yeah floating around i mean i'm not complaining it was just weird because he's some fucking ghost like the rest of the time there to like mediate if things get heated i don't know what his role is anymore uh so demario proceedsario proceeds to say that he can't let her go and that he messed up and that it was his fault for not being 100% truthful from the beginning.
Starting point is 00:04:15 And he wants to gain her trust back. And then he lists one of his favorite quotes which in order to experience joy you must experience pain who was and who did that who said that one he didn't say okay he might have said I thought I don't know I don't know who said it I don't know that he did he also quotes his
Starting point is 00:04:38 uber driver well yeah he said I was talking to my uber driver on the way over here and he said don't take no for an answer. Which, like, hey, dudes. Yeah, that's a creepy saying. That's a shitty saying, also, because no is like a super good answer a lot of the time. Pretty much all the time when someone says no, I'll go so far as to say 100% of the time when someone says no, it's a pretty fucking good answer, I think.
Starting point is 00:05:03 of the time when someone says no, it's a pretty fucking good answer, I think. So at this point, he's kind of been monologuing for like five minutes. And Rachel finally gets a word in. And she says, you know, I need a man who owns up to his mistakes. And when confronted with a hard situation is honest. And if you had owned up maybe in that moment, things might be different. I appreciate that you want to move forward, but forward isn't back to the mansion. It's the other way.
Starting point is 00:05:36 And I'm glad you gave me that quote about the joy and the pain, which I wrote down. That was so good. And then she dismisses him. Yeah, she says, I'm looking for a man. And what I saw in that gymnasium was a boy and so the the go the forward isn't back towards the mansion forwards the other way was like yeah a fucking thermonuclear burn from outer space it was yeah they swing the camera to tomorrow and he says damn and just walks away which like did you did you come back to try to like undo some of the quote-unquote character assassination that happened?
Starting point is 00:06:06 Because, like, that didn't do it. That didn't do it. What he did do was secure his spot on Paradise, which I think he was announced. He is. We're going to talk about, I think, the cast members for Bachelor in Paradise, which I hope you don't count as a spoiler. It's, like, in the news. And we don't know anything about what's going to pop off at Bachelor in Paradise. But I want to talk about it.
Starting point is 00:06:25 Well, and it's not like they're announcing anybody that isn't off the show. Yeah, absolutely. So he's gone. And then Rachel turns back to all the bros that are standing there watching this take place. And they're like, yeah, we just wanted to be here for you. And she's like, I'm good, though, guys. I'm super good. One of them says, he's not coming back, though, is he?
Starting point is 00:06:42 And she says, fuck no. One of them says, he's not coming back though, is he? And she says, fuck no. There's a lot of like accentuated cursing, which like may not come as a surprise is absolutely my jam. That Rachel drops this episode. Yeah. She says, I feel empowered after that, which I think we all did. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:58 It was wonderful. Then we go back to the rest of the cocktail party pre-rose ceremony, which we never to there's a lot of dudes with props at this at this little party we should talk about like sort of the general consensus is like um this like weird group think where every dude um either says like you know rachel's not like the rest of women when she is confronted with something like that she doesn't you know um she doesn't you know uh fall for it she didn't fall for it she's really smart most women most women wouldn't most women be eaten out of his hand but she's she's not like the rest and she's she's really smart and like yeah rachel's very very great but it's like all of them were saying this the same thing like she's
Starting point is 00:07:39 not some high school girl who um somebody and then keeps getting back together with them and then they treat her wrong. The one thing I will say about Rachel is that she was so ready. She said exactly the right thing. I feel like her reaction to him was so much better phrased than I think most people would have done. She was ready. She's like, I appreciate you want to move forward.
Starting point is 00:08:06 Yes. Not to the mansion. How good is that? It's really good. By the way, the name of the woman in the gymnasium was Lexi, and I felt bad all week that we didn't write down what her name was because that must have been a very, very tough thing to do. Okay, so can I talk about
Starting point is 00:08:22 the men with the props now? Yeah. Okay. So Tickle Monster has giant foam hands. Big old ever long hands. I fucking... That he's wearing. Or they might be giants. They might be giants hands, yeah. Yeah, they're enormous.
Starting point is 00:08:34 And I don't know how he packed them, but he brings them out and he does a little fondling and she fondles back and it's a fun moment. A lot of people in the comments are like this is grossing me out y'all you gotta be here for they might be giant's hands you have to celebrate it rachel appreciates that he always has something funny to do if this dude was not tickle monster i think i would show up for him i think i would go to bat for him because he's kind of a he he there's a weird sort of kiss contest but not in the fucking bachelor pad season two way but in a like did you get a kiss i want to kiss that happens later on that he's party too
Starting point is 00:09:11 which uh sucks but like otherwise like he just seems like a perfectly like decent kind of a goober dude if he wasn't a fucking tickle monster which i don't think he applied for no i don't think he was like i want to be the tickle monster this season harrison facebook live stream where he announced all the contestants chris harrison actually says what his real career is but i can't remember like neurosurgeon he makes it clear that bachelor chose tickle monster for him i'd be pissed off are you fucking kidding me i had to quit my job and like buy three new suits and like fly out to la and then probably get embarrassed by your like shitty television show and then you're gonna make me be the fucking tickle monster am i gonna win am i hey real quick
Starting point is 00:10:00 if i take that on am i gonna win as the tickle monster remember was it chris soul season where there was chicken enthusiast gone episode like one or two like chicken enthusiast isn't a chicken enthusiast isn't for closers that's for episode one or two go home it's true it's true uh alex was there with his rubik's cube which is his uh his like talisman of intelligence everybody are you knocking people who i i think people who are super good at rubik's cubes are you think they're inherently smart because they can do i can't fucking do a rubik's cube could you train yourself though if you spend enough hours sure that's why and that's what he did because i think he was doing it like without looking or whatever he
Starting point is 00:10:37 did do kind of an insulting thing where he solved it except for like one rotation and then handed it to her like can you figure it out? Like, yeah, she can, but. I just think it indicates like a compulsive training regimen. Not necessarily that he's some kind of brilliant man. I think he is. This was a very good Alex episode. Kenny has photos of his daughter. Will has a, like a tiny tykes basketball hoop yeah they do some they do some uh just pretty
Starting point is 00:11:10 sick dunking on that and then what does he say uh so he he was on the basketball date and his team won on that date and he says you know and i i feel like i won again tonight and like gets a kiss she says shit will got lines and then goes and kisses him it was really cute um and then we go back let's just sprint fucking this is like a tunnel full of cobwebs and neither of us want to be in this cobweb tunnel tunnel getting cobwebs all over us let's just fucking sprint through it there's more lucas and blake stuff lucas is talking to rachel about blake and suggests that maybe blake has an issue with him because rachel asks like what what's the deal why does blake not like you and lucas says maybe he has a crush on me cool and great and then he tells a story about a banana yeah he goes on to say um yeah i i feel like this
Starting point is 00:12:06 is the most lucas this is more lucas than wabuma is right he says like this dude doesn't like me because he's got a crush on me which is cool homophobia just like right out there yeah and goes on to say like yeah i saw him um i was sleeping and i saw him standing over me while i slept and he peeled a banana and ate it. And I was like, is that a shitty gay joke? Or like, is that how it hit you? It hit me as like, he was trying to do like a really shitty joke and couldn't even stick that particular comedy landing. Not that if he had, it would have been uproariously funny.
Starting point is 00:12:43 But this is like lowest common denominator fucking two and a half men bullshit. And you couldn't even land that plane, huh, Lucas? I think that's exactly what happened. Because when he finished saying it, Rachel had zero reaction. And then she's like, is this serious? And I think in that moment, he decided yes, yes, it is serious. Oh, she didn't laugh. Oh, man. And then she asked him laugh. Oh, man. And then she asked him if Blake finished the banana, which I thought was a fun detail to get clarity on.
Starting point is 00:13:20 She then goes to Blake and Blake's response is the only funny thing that comes out. The only funny thing to ever come out of this whole lucas or blake thing was a thing blake says um not intended i think it sort of parts the curtain a little bit and we get to see inside of the the real depths of blake's soul because she says he said you were over him sleeping and eating a banana and he said well first off i can tell you that's not true because I'm on a ketogenic diet. And I don't eat carbs. And I don't eat carbs. And it was so like, that's where you're, that's where, that's immediately, objection. I don't eat bananas because of my ketogenic diet. Cuts back over to Lucas and he's like, like freaking out. Oh no, he's got me.
Starting point is 00:14:01 I feel like Lucas. It's a real Sherlock moment there. Lucas, I was trying to do a Phoenix Wright thing, but i feel like lucas sherlock moment lucas i was trying to do a phoenix right thing but i feel like lucas should have gone home and blake should have stayed for that moment because she's like blake you have to stay after fucking shutting down his argument like that hey who's phoenix right he's a video game lawyer um and he's a defense attorney and there are people at home that are just like clapping right now they just love these references thanks griffin um and i don't remember anything else about their conversation i don't really want
Starting point is 00:14:31 to talk anymore about it uh yeah blake just tells us the viewer he says you know i just the more i talk about this with her the more it makes it sound like i'm the crazy one okay like yeah like okay rose ceremony. Can we just talk about who goes home? Yes. Do we know who goes home? I know we know two people who go home. Well, I don't know that we know anything besides the two.
Starting point is 00:14:53 Oh, shoot. I don't know that we're going to find it either. We can look for it. But I will say that it gets down to Lee, Diggy, Blake, and Lucas. And they keep cutting back and forth between Blake and Lucas.
Starting point is 00:15:11 Which one's going to go home? One of these guys has to be the winner. One of these guys wins the argument. Who is it? Oh, Jamie. Jamie also goes home. Don't know.
Starting point is 00:15:20 I don't know who Jamie is. No clue. And also Blake and Lucas go home go they both go home uh diggy gets the final rose um which like i hope we get i hope we get some more diggy time i know we haven't gotten much diggy time really at all diggy wears a lot of great clothes right that's diggy isn't it he's got a lot of shoes he has that he's the one who had like all the big shoe collection so lucas goes home first and says some dumb shit and leaves. Blake goes and says, like, it's a shame I got dragged into this drama. I really liked you and I think we could have had a connection and then leaves.
Starting point is 00:15:51 And then. And then they stand outside. They try to set up this thing where they did two, like, side to side in the moment interviews that they do with the people after they get sent home. Just far enough away. But just far enough away. Just at the same time where they can hear each other talking and Blake talks about how like this guy lives in my town I can't get away from
Starting point is 00:16:10 him and which is an important like clue I feel like and then here's here's Lucas talk about like you know fuck Blake and that guy's that guy's a tool or whatever and then Blake goes to walk over to confront lucas
Starting point is 00:16:26 and just kind of puts his hand on his back and says uh hey buddy uh how you doing uh and then lucas is like pretty good and lucas blake says well i just want to let you know you're a piece of shit and fuck you and you got me kicked off the show and like gives him the finger and walks away i can't believe how note for note i'm fucking breaking this down. Breaking down this battle. Yeah, basically Blake says, like, you ruined my chance here. You know, any shot I had at winning is gone because of you. And Lucas says, it's not about winning.
Starting point is 00:16:54 It's about the world. And then they hurl insults at each other. Like, down the driveway. And they start mocking each other's voices. It's a sorry state of affairs it's it's also like two things like there was clearly a producer like all right boys if you want to be on bit final shot give it a go here we go just start yelling keep going keep going keep going keep going keep going the fact number two the fact that they live in the same fucking
Starting point is 00:17:23 town have been on a television show before where they were rivals on that television show then we're on this television show and instantly and inexplicably became rivals again and then played out this final completely catastrophic failed comedy battle the bachelor was even like playing that fucking like boom boom boom boom music of like uh-oh a clown fight and it's like it wasn't fucking there was nothing remotely funny about it fucking at all or entertaining about it at all and so like justin and sydney texted him like so they definitely like came up with this at home and brought this scene to play out here. And it's like, I mean, definitely, the question is, did Bachelorette say, hey, come on, we saw you on Exile, come on and do this scene.
Starting point is 00:18:15 There's so many ways to read this that's just like, this was clearly some acting, some play acting that was going on. And the fact that this was sought out and brought onto the show is mind-boggling because it sucks so bad. It was not funny. It was not entertaining. I will say, I just came up with a parallel for Lucas because Lucas thinks he's a comedian, right?
Starting point is 00:18:43 He thinks that's what his career is. You know who Lucas reminds me of? Oh, I hope this is going to not be insulting to... The fictional character. Oh, good. Joey Gladstone. I mean, that's, no, that's doing an immense... Remember Mr. Woodchuck?
Starting point is 00:18:58 Yes, it's doing an immense disservice to Mr. Woodchuck and Joey Gladstone in general, because he targeted that shit at kids that's true if you showed up in front of a bunch of kids and just shouted waboom and shook your head around cut it out that was for us for adults yeah i mean he had some adult material yeah they didn't let him break it out on the show very much this dude came on this show and thought i'll captivate america on this adult dating reality show by just shaking my head around and screaming waboom and saying the most inane bullshit imaginable we've just wasted like five minutes of people's time with it they wasted fucking maybe four cumulative hours of our time with it and
Starting point is 00:19:36 goodbye fuck off please don't come to bib please god please fuck lucas definitely is coming to bit fuck i don't know if blake is uh okay group date first date card um lights camera action brian jonathan peter alex will fred they are going to the ellen show explosion of applause and jubilation and celebration. Rachel says, Ellen is my spirit animal. Yes. Which I don't know if that's cool to say about a person, but. I would be psyched to go on Ellen. Oh, me too.
Starting point is 00:20:15 It seems like it'd be a fucking really, really fun time. I know people talk some shit about like, you go on and you dance, but like, yeah. Yeah. It'd be fun. So what? I'd do Ellen. I'd do the Chew.
Starting point is 00:20:28 I would fucking tear up the Chew. You putting a call out there right now, Hollywood Griffin Matthew? Hey, the Chew, get at me, please. Hey, the Chew, it's the Griffin. It's the Griffin. Come chew me up. So the dudes all show up. That wasn't a Vore thing, by the way.
Starting point is 00:20:44 Please, God, don't. Delete that tweet. Delete it. It. That wasn't a Vore thing, by the way. Please, God, don't delete that tweet. Delete it. Um. It was a little bit of Vore thing. Okay. The dudes all show up. They don't really know exactly what they're going to be doing.
Starting point is 00:20:57 Uh, they just, they know that they will be part of the show. They have not been told how. And Rachel goes out first to talk to Ellen. And she answers some questions. One of the questions is if she's kissed anybody yet, which she says that she has, which some of the dudes are surprised about, namely Fred. Because Fred has not kissed her. Jonathan as well. Jonathan, yes.
Starting point is 00:21:18 Guys all come out. And surprise, they have to take their shirts off. They take their shirts off and dance all up on women for, I guess they have dollars that they give the men in their pant, waist, waistbands. Men in their pants. Yeah, the guys all dance and we watch them dance. Alex and Kenny probably have the best moves. Yes, for reasons that we will understand later. best moves yes for for reasons that we will understand later um but alex everybody's kind of surprised by because he grinds up on somebody's grandma and then says like whoever's in the moment interview like whoever's grandma that was i'm really sorry i'm not usually like this um we
Starting point is 00:21:59 both had a lot of fun uh tickle monster doesn't dance well imagine that uh he's more of a he's more about fine fine movements he's more about not he doesn't sort of please the mind or the eye he pleases he pleases the body with his hands uh somebody in the rose face group was talking about how this was very objectifying for the men which it definitely was for sure i will say it definitely happens on the bachelorette a lot yeah i'm not saying that it's there's always men lubing up and wrestling and yes yes yes taking their shirts off and that's just part of it man every season yeah that's not to excuse it i mean there's also like fucking like chris saying it didn't surprise me chris soul what's the worst objectification? I think the worst one.
Starting point is 00:22:45 Exactly what you're about to say. I can remember is Chris Soule's season. They have, it was a group date. I think it was like six or seven women. They inexplicably. Do a tractor race down. In bikinis.
Starting point is 00:22:56 Down a street. And I think San Francisco, I think they went to San Francisco for it. And so they were in San Francisco in the middle of the fucking street and they had to race down the street in tractors wearing bikinis. And it was also a challenge his season where they had to run around and do farm chores.
Starting point is 00:23:09 And one of them was to like milk a goat and then drink that milk at the end. Oh, yeah. That one was pretty gross, too. For other reasons. That's not I don't fuck with nothing without Louis Pasteur's seal of approval on it. Thanks, science. Without Louis Pasteur's seal of approval on it. Yeah, thanks, science. Okay, so then the dudes all end up on stage playing Never Have I Ever, which if you're not familiar with the game.
Starting point is 00:23:31 Everyone knows Never Have I Ever. Okay. So the questions are, have you ever hit on someone while you're on a date? Everybody says no. And then Rachel says, you lied. You literally just danced all up on a bunch of people in front of me on this date. There was also, have you thought about having sex with Rachel? And both Alex and Peter say no, which nobody believes.
Starting point is 00:23:53 That's, that's. I'm willing to give folks the benefit of the doubt about stuff. And, like, I think there's a difference between, like, I'm not saying it's good to objectify somebody but like they did i guess there's a difference between having sexual thoughts and explicitly thinking about having sex with someone whoa you just took my fucking shit apart i'm saying like i it is bad to look at somebody and think about what it would be like to have sex with them but when you are on a dating reality show where you're going on dates with somebody and spending all of this time competing for somebody's affection and then like you probably think about it i guess that's a stereotype because
Starting point is 00:24:34 i i will say that i don't have memories of thinking that when i first met guys that i was attracted to oh Oh, geez. I'm sorry. You didn't think about this? For those at home, Griffin is doing a very seductive dance. That was a god of pleasure. That was not like a disappointment. God.
Starting point is 00:25:05 There is definitely a stereotype, though, I guess, that men think about about that and i just assumed it was true i don't know i don't want to comment on that as much as i will comment on like you're on a fucking dating competition show where like you are trying to mack on somebody as efficiently as is humanly possible during the limited time you have with them to try and get married you probably think about the the what the sex would be like i bet yeah especially some of those dates that are very sexual i guess we haven't had any of those this season no uh i mean this date was sexual for some of the people in the audience but other things that came out um we know that alex has peed in the pool at the banchler mansion banchler man uh alex was like he did a in the moment interview the Banchler Mansion. Banchler Mansion. Alex was like,
Starting point is 00:25:46 he did an In The Moment interview where he was like, I just answer it honestly every time. I wanted to know. I can be honest. Peter, Will, and Alex have all texted nude selfies. The next question was, has anyone hooked up with a woman twice
Starting point is 00:26:02 their age? And Fred says that he has, rachel says explains a lot because he was a count or a camper when she was a counselor that doesn't explain anything well she's just kind of joking yeah he likes older women um and then fred tells the story about having met her before and she manages to squeeze in the fact that he was bad again it was really this part was really uncomfortable because it was like why does the audience need to hear about this part like it got like weirdly serious after like joking about alex peeing in the pool i also do like i
Starting point is 00:26:37 thought they were kind of setting it up like maybe fred was completely candid because i thought maybe they were setting up like all the guys being shocked. Like what you knew her before. Yeah. That is not what happened. I kind of wonder if there wasn't some other reason why Rachel wasn't like real, real into Fred that we never really got told, which is not to say like Rachel was being sneaky or anything.
Starting point is 00:27:02 I totally get it. Think about it. Like think about like kids you babysat for, like Rachel was being sneaky or anything. I totally get it. Think about it. Like, think about like kids you babysat for. Like, could you ever think of them as like romantic peers? That is a completely banana cakes question that you're asking me. But like,
Starting point is 00:27:16 no, I guess not. That's what, that's where I think Rachel's coming from. Like I was introduced to you as a young camper. What's the, what's the age, what's the age difference there? Cause I didn't think it was that much. It's really not that much. Yeah. See, what's the what's the age what's the age difference there because i didn't think it was that much it's really not that much yeah see that's the thing
Starting point is 00:27:28 like but i i just like for example when i was in high school uh we worked with a bunch of fifth graders at like a high school camp that's way too much that's obviously like way too far that's obviously way way too many years well like what if i what if i had met you oh this is a fun game that rachel and i like to play sometimes we're and the best thing about this game check this out is you don't have to stress out about whether or not you're going to win the game or not because nobody wins the game i'm just saying if i was uh for sake of a soft if you were a sophomore in high school, I would have been a fifth grader.
Starting point is 00:28:07 That's it. That's what's up. And I'm just saying, I think it would be hard to get that out of my mind. Sure, I got you. That's what I'm saying. I was a pretty fucking smooth fifth grader. Are You Smoother Than a Fifth Grader
Starting point is 00:28:22 was a show that they were going to do about me, but Jeff Foxworthy wasn't famous enough yet. Jeff Foxworthy was still the host? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wouldn't be somebody like smooth? No, Jeff Foxworthy was pretty fucking smooth, man. I guess that is operating on the argument that Jeff Foxworthy is smart,
Starting point is 00:28:37 which is why he hosts Smarter Than a Fifth Grader. He's more famous than anybody in this whole city combined. So I think he's pretty smart. I have a note on my phone. Oh, I probably don't because I don't have an iPhone anymore. But for a while, like Rachel and I, when we would go to bed, we would just like talk about like the dumbest shit. And I would take notes. I forgot about this.
Starting point is 00:29:00 This is good because nothing will ever happen with it. But I just want to put it out there into the universe. One of those notes that was on my phone for like four years was simply Jeff Foxworthy TED Talk. We did some runs at that. That was fun. Okay, what happened next? Okay, so now they're going to a place called Hudson Loft for drinks for the night portion. And this is where Fred tells us, the viewer, that he is super into Rachel. He says that she is deeply rooted in his soul and that he has been waiting 20 years to kiss her.
Starting point is 00:29:40 So a lot of expectations. Yeah, no kidding. Then we get a nice little tidbit from Alex. Alex gets some time with her and talks about the different eye contact and what they mean. Yeah, he says, you look at me in the left eye with your left eye, which means I can tell you're telling the truth. Well, he says the left eye is emotion and the right eye is logic. And you always look at me in your left eye. I'm partially blind in my left eye.
Starting point is 00:30:08 Does that mean I'm not as emotional as you are? What eye am I looking at you? I go right to left. Or no, I go right to right. No, babe. You can't do it while you're thinking about it. All right, hold on. Three, two, one, go.
Starting point is 00:30:23 Yeah, I go right to right. I think I look in your right eye, too. Shit. Maybe I just trained myself because of your partial blindness. Yeah, that one always, yeah. I don't know. Anyway, it was a nice little fun fact from Alex. And there's just like a lot of kissing and hugging between her and the dudes,
Starting point is 00:30:43 especially after this date where they're i guess all the guys found out they were kissing they just felt like hey now now it's kissapalooza yeah um and then it's time for fred and rachel and fred starts talking about how he's been waiting for the right time to kiss her and he says is now that time and she says are you asking me because most of the time you just people just like do it and yeah a lot of folks are making really really good points about like kind of a missed opportunity to like talk about explicit consent here and that would have been like cool because that is kind of what fred did by saying like i'm going to kiss you now yeah is this the i've been waiting for the right moment to kiss you is this it and if she was feeling it with fred she probably wouldn't have cared that
Starting point is 00:31:34 was the problem is that like she so wasn't and so like and and fred's approach was fred's fred's approach my main problem with this and the reason like, like, the shine came off the Fred apple for me was that, like, Fred's approach to this was literally, oh, everyone else has gotten kisses. I'm gonna go get one of those kisses, too, which is a really fucking bogus, like. Yeah. It's a really, really fucking bogus argument and a really shitty way to like think about this this process i feel like it wasn't aided by the fact that she wasn't into him and i don't know why she even kept him around this long but anyway they do kiss and they do kiss and the way the show is edited it makes it look like they go back to the group immediately she picks up the rose and asks fred to walk out
Starting point is 00:32:23 again and fred thinks he's gonna get that rose she's holding it the taking the rose and asks Fred to walk out again. And Fred thinks he's going to get that rose. She's holding it. The taking the rose thing is mean, but it's also literally what happens every time that this next part happens. Yeah. So she walks him away from the group and she said that she knows she's been focused on the past. She felt like she was doing a disservice by doing that, but she just can't reciprocate, and it wouldn't be fair to keep him around. So they get in the elevator and they go down.
Starting point is 00:32:52 They hold hands in the elevator, which they did. Really? I didn't notice that. Yeah, they were holding hands. Oh. Which was like, ugh. And all the guys are looking out the window, and they think maybe they're going on some little one-on-one excursion, but she puts him in the car.
Starting point is 00:33:07 He's just going on a one excursion. And he tells us in the car that he was falling in love with her. See, like, that's a lot, man. That's a lot for episode three. That's a lot for episode three and a lot to, like, follow up this, like, I'm sorry. to like follow up this like i'm sorry she says later on that um all these other dudes are kissing her that they kiss like men and he kissed like a boy which is a really fucking brutal thing to say about somebody as they're leaving a television show but at the same time like you can't go from i want to get a kiss because everyone else got a kiss too i think i was falling in love with her because that that i i'm sorry it's kind of a childish way to think about rome romance i think a little bit oh
Starting point is 00:33:52 for sure for sure he was just fixated yeah uh so she ends up giving the rose to alex yeah who just had a good he's had a good show he was very charming and he he really put his fucking back into that booty, that booty pop. Really grinded those nuts on just a bunch of folks. Just a bunch of them. Before we go on to the next thing, do you think maybe that I could take a moment from the podcast and a moment of your time to steal you away? Oh, it's on me now, huh? I don't have one ready. How about this?
Starting point is 00:34:27 I'll do this. I spit. I spit everywhere. I spit all over myself and the ground and the chair. I spit on myself, my shirt, the chair, the ground. Sorry I couldn't deliver this week. I'm sorry. I delivered what I delivered. It was subpar. Our sponsors
Starting point is 00:34:49 this week include Blue Apron. Hey! You were just talking about them. Yeah, I ate your good steak and it made me tired. So, Blue Apron is a meal service. Oh, don't look at the notes, babe. Speak from the heart.
Starting point is 00:35:05 Speak from the soul. We literally just ate it. We can probably talk about it. For less than $10 per person per meal, they deliver seasonal recipes along with pre-portioned ingredients that you can use to make delicious home-cooked meals. They have meals listed here.
Starting point is 00:35:16 Let's just talk about some stuff that they've sent us that turned out fucking baller. This steak with the roasted vegetables was really, really good. It was good. It had a salsa verde with capers that i'm i'm turning around on capers big fan we did a honey rhubarb chicken that was pretty good we did the barbecue chicken wings um with the sweet potato fries
Starting point is 00:35:37 they're fucking awesome those are really good um yeah they're all really good. We love Blue Apron and like it feeds us and, um, it's like stressful for us to meal plan just because our schedule is so tight between like work or our individual jobs in the podcast and a baby. Um, and like having three dinners per week kind of spoken for is like actually really, really helpful. I'm going to be honest with you. Like I have some go-to meals that I've been making for years now and I'm bored with
Starting point is 00:36:08 them and Griffin clearly is also bored with them. I'm not bored with them. I get psyched. You make a turkey chili that's good and you make a pasta sauce that's really good. But we have never had the same meal twice from Blue Apron in the year that we've been using it and that's
Starting point is 00:36:24 not bullshit. That's the truth that we've been using it. And that's not like bullshit. That's the truth. They change the menu constantly. So check out this week's menu and get your first three meals free with free shipping by going to blueapron.com slash rose. I also wanted to talk about Jet. Do you remember that band? Do you remember the band Jet? I do.
Starting point is 00:36:44 What was their song? They came out around the same time as The Strokes did. They had, oh, Are You Gonna Be My Girl? Was that them? Oh, man. Split up in 2012. It's a shame. No, this isn't the band.
Starting point is 00:36:59 Although, wouldn't that be crazy if they were like, we're announcing our reunion on Rose Buddies. Although, wouldn't that be crazy if they were like, we're announcing our reunion on Rose Buddies. Rose Buddies is supported in part by Jet, a shopping site that makes it easy to save money on the stuff you buy all the time. You used Jet to buy some stuff. I did. Yeah. I'm a big deal hunter. I like finding things at a discount.
Starting point is 00:37:20 You're a couponista. Yeah. And on Jet.com, prices drop as you shop. The more you add to your cart, the more you save. Free shipping on orders over $35. Free returns within 30 days. No membership or annual fees. You can save 20% off your first two orders of $35 or more if you visit Jet.com and you enter the promo code BUDDIES at checkout.
Starting point is 00:37:41 Yeah. So, for example, I bought some stuff for Henry, and I knew I wasn't going to return it, and I knew I was going to play with a debit card, and that saved me some money. Yeah, so for example, I bought some stuff for Henry and I knew I wasn't going to return it and I knew I was going to play with a debit card and that saved me some money. Yeah. So there's little options here and there to choose that will save you some dollars. That's Jet.com. Code buddies. Terms and conditions apply. See Jet.com for those
Starting point is 00:37:57 deets. I got a Jumbotron. Hit me with it over the head. Well, I don't want to do that. Come on, bludgeon me with this thing. The message is for Patrick and Kristen. Hi. It is from Laura.
Starting point is 00:38:13 Hi, Laura. The Bachelor claims to know of love, but here's what's really true. Nothing is as pure as the example set by you. Oh, man. Congrats on your marriage. Pat, I'm so grateful you're my brother. And Kristen, I'm so lucky I get you as a sister. I know Lil' Grinder is watching your special day from doggy heaven.
Starting point is 00:38:36 Aw. Making turdlets on heaven's carpet in celebration. Aw. Oh, man. There are very few messages that would get me to say the word turdlets. This was the one, though. This was the one. And I was about to talk about how much I missed the Grindr, the TV show. But it's good that we didn't because this sounds like a more serious loss.
Starting point is 00:38:58 Yes. Although the Grindr TV show was a serious loss. But this is more. I do want to stress this. This is more serious. More serious. Yes. Congratulations on your marriage.
Starting point is 00:39:08 Yes. Another Jumbotron? Yeah, I got it if you're ready. Can I read it? Sure. This message is for Lars, King of the Crabs, Beak Lord of the Squid Squad, and Father of Dragons. And it's from Megan, who doesn't have any special titles.
Starting point is 00:39:25 Megan says, Happy Father's Day. Oh, that's coming up. I know. You know what you got for me? Uh-huh, I do. You have many amazing attributes, but watching you with our sons always fills my heart with love. Thank you for being my partner and better half
Starting point is 00:39:40 in the huge job of raising two crazy children. I know you are in this for the right reasons. Love, Megan. That is so sweet. That's a good one. Can we just do a podcast that's just like us reading nice messages that people have for each other? Are we getting paid each time?
Starting point is 00:39:57 Seems kind of like a scam. No, people wouldn't have to pay us. It could just be like a, you know. You just open the floodgates. Okay, this is not going to happen. This is obviously not going to happen because the last thing we can do is take on new projects. But how nice would that be? Everybody's favorite part of Delilah has been Delilah with that smoky voice.
Starting point is 00:40:14 It's just like, here's one for Jeffrey. And Jeffrey, your best friend, Artemis, wants you to know that he's sorry about stealing your car and driving it into the ocean. Here's a little song by Billy Ocean. But then, like, the Billy Ocean song wouldn't play. And they would just go right on to the next, like, Susan, hi, it's Delilah. You know, the holidays are a hard time of year for her. Hi, everybody. I'm Justin McElroy. And I'm
Starting point is 00:40:45 Dr. Sydney McElroy. Every week we release a medical history podcast called Sawbones. We go over the history of the dumbest, grossest, weirdest stuff humans have been doing to each other since the dawn of mankind. But it's a funny show. But it's also so disgusting
Starting point is 00:41:02 and stomach-turning you won't believe it. But it's also like funny it's funny it is the wildest grossest nastiest stuff you can imagine it's a real hoot it's called sawbones and we release it every week on itunes wherever podcasts are sold and right here on maximumfun.org uh so we go back to the mansion and this is where we start to see some of Eric's inner turmoil. Eric is not getting a lot of passion from Rachel. He doesn't feel like he's really connecting with her. Eric was the dude who was on the after the final rose who came out and danced and we were like so much.
Starting point is 00:41:39 Yeah. Just in love. They're kind of stagnating and he's starting to get concerned about it and he's kind of talking about it in the house. He's just like, this happens to like somebody maybe more than just one person every season. We're just like, you get really, really, really insecure and that insecurity manifests in very like visible ways. Well, you're just making yourself so vulnerable. Like you're on this television program where all of america is watching you compete for this woman yeah and the woman doesn't have to give you anything back and he is very uncomfortable
Starting point is 00:42:11 with that right uh so we get more of that later but first it is a one-on-one date with anthony okay this is the first time i think this has ever happened no date card no date card that they didn't show it it's just we see anthony walking down the street by himself anthony who like i loved his bio he's my uh murakami buddy um and then we haven't seen anything from and then he's just like oh and here he is on a solo date it's like really i thought anthony was maybe gonna go home this episode because we haven't seen anything with him but here he is him describing the date card but not showing it yeah which was weird i wonder if they ran out of tape because there's some alternate universe where like they didn't focus like so much time on fucking waboom and on on babubal and lucas somebody else got the one-on-one date and they had to pivot well i
Starting point is 00:43:02 don't know that's crazy that's crazy conspiracy theory uh so they are on rodeo drive and who shows up on a horse but rachel and rachel has an extra horse for anthony and they're gonna ride horses the way you've pitched this makes it sound like she shows up on a horse. Hey, Anthony. Well, I've got this other horse I'm not riding if you want to. I like that universe where like wacky stuff happens all the time and they just turn it into dates. Yeah. So they're going to ride these horses down Rodeo Drive. And everybody is like losing their mind on Rodeo Drive taking videos of them.
Starting point is 00:43:41 On Rodeo Drive, taking videos of them. And then they ride the horses into a cowboy-themed store where they get boots and hats and belt buckles. And I wonder about the scouting for locations on this date. Yeah, this is like, when we scouted for, we did a segment on MBM, on the TV show, where we ran around and, like, got little jobs at local businesses. And that just entailed, like, producers that morning, like, calling the places and be like, we'll just be in there for a minute. We promise not to break anything. I can't. And that even, there was some pushback. And this was, like, the most comfortable scenario you could maybe imagine.
Starting point is 00:44:21 Because I think we knew the owners of two of the stores. And they were still like, ooh, I don't know. maybe imagine because i think we knew the owners of two of the stores and they were still like oh i don't know to be like hey these um uh these people who are in this dating reality show are going to come in here on these 12 foot monsters that are probably going to shit and piss all over the place and so pros you'll get exposure for your store con there will be a live horse in here stink won't leave stink won't leave of course i'll get real freaked out, cut itself on the glass, and you'll be liable for like all that. But what do you say?
Starting point is 00:44:49 So they get all their Western gear and then they go to a Sprinkles Cupcake ATM. They get matching red cowboy boots and like cowboy hats. And it's fucking awesome. It's really good. They do not get off the horses. It is so important for you to keep in mind. Once they are on these horses on this date they literally never step off and so they're like putting boots on anthony's feet as he's like up on top of this very very big fucking horse anything i think i read uh is six four and
Starting point is 00:45:17 so like and he looked kind of tiny on this giant mammoth horse so this is just inside of a store um clopping around okay so the cupcakes the cupcakes they get the cupcakes that are called horse cupcakes is rodeo i'm sorry that i have to ask this because it makes me sound like the biggest fucking rube but like can you just ride horses on rodeo drive no way there's no way right somebody will probably correct us but there's just no way the date card chris said like one of these dates is something that i guarantee can only happen in la as if riding horses on rodeo drive and just going into the fucking stores is something you can do kind of like you can just drink openly on bourbon street i will say i have seen people riding
Starting point is 00:46:00 horses around austin have you seen that before well that's texas that's like statewide okay it's just it this show didn't even address it it just made it seem like yeah you can ride horses down rodeo drive and they let you just go right into the businesses that's probably not true because that's like a fucking buck wild mad max way to govern kind of yeah like what if everybody decided one day that they were all gonna do it's horse day it's horse day june 7th is horse day oh that's today that'll be the day this episode comes out it's horse day everybody get out there saddle up everybody get on your horses go into boutique clothing stores uh i just walk into fucking canter into a forever 21 it's like oh that top's cute i've just trampled an employee this will drive demand and stores will start carrying horse gear yeah maybe you know so you can get a little cupcake this cupcake store had a horse cupcake a little top for you and a little top for your pony yeah my pony
Starting point is 00:46:58 ate all the bracelets on this counter is it okay if i just leave or do i need to am i gonna be arrested or like to just tell me what the tell me what the protocol is he ate all these necklaces uh so they are in this boutique clothing store and this is when we find out or at least when i found out that you cannot show horse poop on television fucking double standard standard. Double standard with what? When can you show poop? You can't show human poop, and I'm down with that.
Starting point is 00:47:32 Although they show poop and they blur it out. Usually on Are You The One, that's the only show where they'll even sort of show you... What about dog? Can you show dog? I could look at dog poop. I'm fine with that. No, but is it allowed? Oh, probably not, no. But we can watch it.
Starting point is 00:47:47 Here's what I'm saying. Double standard. We can watch somebody fucking inside NCIS. Somebody gets shot in the fucking head. Or like... Good point. Special victims units. Like you cut the whole torso into little bites.
Starting point is 00:47:59 Good point. But we can't show a little bit of poop. It's natural. It's just somebody gets shot in the tummy on NYPD Blue and the guts come out. But you can't show me just a little bit of some poop. Anyway, the horse poops in the store. We don't get to see it. But we can watch fucking.
Starting point is 00:48:21 Thanks, ABC, for not showing us what we want to see. We can watch Grey's Anat anatomy where somebody gets like a fucking radio and lit on fire there was a recent episode where a human being was on fire hey guys you made me watch kyle chandler explode but i can't watch him poop in a toilet and then see the poop it's all i want i can watch k watch Kyle Chandler turn into red mist as he explodes, as he tries to get the bomb out. And Meredith sees it, and she's not the same afterwards. But you can't let me watch
Starting point is 00:48:51 someone stand up and then let me see the poop that they made in the potty. A real mature Grey's Anatomy. Grey's Anatomy, it's medical, okay? You're a medical show. Show me the poop. Okay. Please don't let that be a phrase that people associate with you. That's up to them.
Starting point is 00:49:11 Okay. Okay, night portion of their date. Nothing. How much happens? They go and they have dinner and they have um so he gets very very deep i feel like in his conversations he's an old soul he's an old soul she says you're an old soul how did you get like that he gets a rose and he gets a rose they go and they dance in front of a jazz quartet on top of a scenic overlook looking over la and it is the most like mulholland drive like weird shit to have a more current reference i mean yeah i guess maybe a little bit we can stick with
Starting point is 00:49:54 mulholland drive if you want um so and then i think what happened he gets back from the date and then we get back to the the eric stuff. Well, so first there's a date card, a group date, Brady, Dean, Adam, when we're assuming Adam jr. Kenny,
Starting point is 00:50:12 Bryce, Lee, Jack, and Eric. This is where we find out Iggy does not get a date this week. Yeah. He has not been invited on anything. And so he's a little upset about that.
Starting point is 00:50:24 And then this is where eric starts talking about his insecurities again and iggy decides he will not let it stand and so he enters the conversation that eric is having with some of the other guys he's mostly talking with anthony who just got back from the date and he's like talking about he's he's not even um he's not talking to anthony in any sort of heated way he's just like sort of expressing why, he's not talking to Anthony in any sort of heated way. He's just like sort of expressing why he, he's very, very vocal about his insecurity and like maybe, maybe more so than like strategically you should be in this house. Because I think anytime you show a sign of weakness on this show, like people are going
Starting point is 00:51:01 to come after you to an extent. But Iggy just kind of like drops himself down on a chair, like across from their conversation. And it's like, okay, so you're what you're saying that like Rachel's not doing this for authentic reasons. And she's like not being real or what are you saying? Yeah, Eric has some concerns because he just can't tell because he hasn't spent enough time with her where Rachel's head's at. tell because he hasn't spent enough time with her where rachel's head's at and he makes some comments about whether or not she's really committing to the process like he is like all the other guys are and iggy decides that this is his moment to pounce and eric gets really upset uh that iggy has entered the conversation unprompted and is now kind of going after him
Starting point is 00:51:43 and he yells he does some yelling yeah um and this is this is i guess when lee starts to does lately okay we get this sequence is shot in a weird way where we see a lot of the other dudes kind of reacting yeah exactly because eric eric is he's yelling like other guys notice yeah and so like this is this is kind of foreshadowing for what happens later in that we see like lee and i think um brady like looking over from a couch and like kind of like noticing it it was just like a weird cutaway thing that like me watching was like oh okay so this is something that's gonna be a thing yeah probably later yeah um i i will say at no point in this episode do i have any concerns about eric yeah i don't either like he he pounds he loses his temper with he's under a lot of stress yeah sure he and and i don't know that he necessarily says or does anything especially harmful he does kind of pounce on iggy a little bit but like iggy
Starting point is 00:52:51 also was just like being a being a nosy dude and like literally walked into this circle where these like three dudes were talking and just kind of like hunkered down into this conversation it's like oh so you think rachel's inauthentic well and iggy too like iggy has a right to feel kind of frustrated because he doesn't get a date this week so to hear any guy yeah sure that just got a date complain yeah i get it he's kind of intolerant about it yeah so anyway so this is there's a thing we're not talking about we're going to talk about it in a bit i promise it's it comes up again we're trying to be like chronological about this which maybe isn't the best way to have this conversation. But just a teaser, Lee's a big piece of shit.
Starting point is 00:53:35 Group date. Rachel shows up with her squad, which includes Raven, Alexis, Corinne, and Jasmine. Love it. This season of Bip is going to be so fucking good. Yeah. The ladies are going to go on the date with the men. All of them are on, right? All of them are on Bip?
Starting point is 00:53:54 Yes. All of them are on Bip. What's up? I'm not 100% on that. They are. Oh, they are? Who are you unsure about? I didn't know if it was both Raven and Alexis.
Starting point is 00:54:05 Yeah. Okay, great. They Who are you unsure about? I didn't know if it was both Raven and Alexis. Yeah. Okay, great. They all get on a party bus. And on party buses, has been my experience and is true on the show, there are poles, which may be for structural reasons. I don't know. It's a load-bearing bus pole it's holding up the roof of the bus but it always demands that somebody get up on the pole uh at which point bryce rises to the occasion and then kenny reveals his hidden talents uh which we saw a little bit at the ellen show we find out later
Starting point is 00:54:41 and this has been confirmed on the internet a hundred times over kenny was chippendales dancer yeah uh and then there's a little scuttlebutt yeah raven decides that she's going to ask some of the guys who might be there for the wrong reasons yes so she kind of pulls bryce aside is it bry Bryce or Brady? It's Bryce. Bryce. Bryce is the transphobic, also piece of shit. Kind of leans over to Bryce
Starting point is 00:55:11 and asks who's there for the wrong reasons. And Bryce kind of reinterprets that as who is wrong for Rachel. And he says, Eric. And then apparently, and we don't get to see this happen,
Starting point is 00:55:23 Raven also talks to Lee. And Lee also says Eric. So the group date goes to a small bar that has a large mud pit. There's like a crowd in addition to Rachel's squad. There's also a crowd of women around this mud pit. And the men find out that they are going to be mud wrestling uh and so as the guys go get ready for this uh understandably there's some trepidation about kenny because kenny is a professional wrestler and he's also doing his
Starting point is 00:55:58 fucking promo like yeah what's his thing he's the the pit bull. Pretty boy. The pretty boy pit bull. Something like that. And he's obviously going to fucking butcher everybody there at this. AJ is also there. Oh, yeah. We get a quick shot of Adam Jr. Very quick. Very quick shot.
Starting point is 00:56:20 And so the guys all get in their little swim shorts. And the women in Raven's or in Rachel's squad are all in ponchos because it is about to get very muddy. There is a before even a match takes place. And this happens a couple of times. There is a cut to a woman in the audience who amidst absolute silence shouts show us your junk it wasn't even like it was like all of the people were like cheering and yelling it was just like and it was so awkward because you could tell like somebody said like somebody asked for the somebody shout right now quiet can we have some quiet please okay you go ahead and ask to see junk
Starting point is 00:57:05 it happens later and it's again like all of the women standing behind this one woman completely silent and motionless as she shouts like yeah i want to see your butt and it's like that's not how that's that's that doesn't feel organic, Bachelorette. Just dead silence and like... Wiener time. Make your mouth and a kissy face at me. I would like to see your hand on your chest and rub circular. Yeah, spread your butt cheeks way out.
Starting point is 00:57:51 There's lots of matches um and i wrote down all the results but it's really not it's not important it comes down to bryce and kenny kenny does uh wrestle lee and fucking like brock lesnar blows a kiss at rachel he fucking yeah he's straight up like pile drives i thought he broke his fucking neck and then turns over to rachel and blows a kiss and like go watch this this one like half second of footage as the the squad she is with reacts as if the the kiss hit them with like actual they all like jump to their feet. Jasmine like is knocked backwards by it because it's the fucking best thing ever. But then sadly. Sadly, Bryce beats Kenny.
Starting point is 00:58:33 Fucking set up. I don't really know what Bryce's superpower he employed. He wrestled right after Kenny's last match. I think Kenny might have just been out of the juice. So Rachel debriefs with her squad yes and the women all like dean uh which do you remember anything about dean i mean he's the one who said once you go back you oh yeah don't go back that's for sure um which we've gotten some criticism uh specifically speaking about this one thing that like, we're still really hard on Dean when this is a phrase that not reclaimed and so like i think folks are critical of us for saying that like it's it's weird that rachel's into this dude um which like if it's if that is the case like that's that's totally fine like all all we can kind of speak for is personally
Starting point is 00:59:37 it makes me uncomfortable it's like something that i would not say if it's if it's empowering for for folks like i get it but like i also like't know, I, I was willing to give him a pass if he later came on and said, Hey, you know what, I was super nervous. And that was really dumb. I guess I just kept expecting him to kind of backpedal from it. And he never did. Once he found out she liked it. He was like, cool, I meant to there are people for whom like, it is not.
Starting point is 01:00:02 It's not offensive. And it's not an issue. It's not a problem. It is it can be empowering. And it's like offensive and it's not an issue it's not a problem it is it it can be empowering and it's like that's that's that's fine and like i i don't know if we made a blanket statement like it sucks that rachel's into this dude like um i don't know that's not where i'm at i just think i just think it's kind of a i think it's kind of a shit way to like introduce yourself to somebody on television but there's a lot of things that do not operate in a logical way on this inherently
Starting point is 01:00:26 illogical television show. So the women all like Dean. Raven shares the concern she heard about Eric. And Jasmine tries to kind of give him the benefit of the doubt and just says, you know, Eric seems very serious to me. But Raven said, you know, I talked to Bryce. And he's a shitty voice. I talked to Lee and they had concerns about him.
Starting point is 01:00:53 We get this nice moment with Rachel and Kenny, where Kenny talks about being a former Chippendale dancer and then takes off his sweater and tears his white undershirt and twirls it over his head. And I just thought, hey, thanks, Kenny, for showing us what you can do. Kenny's so much fun. I like Kenny a lot. He's fun. So this is the portion of the date where all the men are getting some
Starting point is 01:01:20 time with Rachel. So when it comes time for Eric's turn, Eric just kind of lays it all out on the table so that he's been feeling vulnerable, uh, and has some concerns kind of about where she's at. And she says, you know, I want you to know, I see you and I'm happy you're here. And I really want to get to know you. Uh, and it seems like they're kind of finding their footing again. And then she's like, Hey, I want to tell you about these rumors uh that came from bryce and lee uh that maybe you're you're kind of doubting my sincerity uh and she's like i don't want you to know that i'm very serious and he's like i wonder why they
Starting point is 01:01:59 would say that and so he goes back to the fire where everyone's kind of clustered around and decides to confront Lee and Bryce. Which immediately the other dudes on the date were like, well, I'm gonna go. Yeah. And kind of leaves the three of them there. And Bryce kind of explains where he's coming from, says, you know, I just, you, uh, what? I forget. I fucking forget what Bryce says.
Starting point is 01:02:23 I don't know what Brycece says but he basically says like it was not the way it was nothing personal i think they were just asking like of the dudes on this bus like who is the least experienced in love and i i said you yeah and it really wasn't anything personal um and eric eric takes that at face value and says you know you have kind of a good energy and i and i believe what you're saying lee says uh that you know but you have the least relationship experience and you have an experience loved and you know i love you man but you know i just like i just he's saying like i respect you and like i love you i love you man but like you you know i respect you and i love you man and um you know it wasn't anything
Starting point is 01:03:03 personal it's just like i don't think that um you have as much i feel like the two of them basically said the same fucking thing and eric's only response to was like to bryce like you know i believe it coming from you but like lee i don't there's something about your energy where i just don't think it's real and lee just keeps saying like all right well listen i love you man and like uh and and eventually eric says like why do you keep saying that yeah well and then this is where lee i think starts to realize that eric's not buying it because then he brings up the iggy thing yeah he says well i saw you yell at iggy and i just gotta be honest like i just had some concerns about that um and there's an there's an in the moment interview
Starting point is 01:03:42 here with lee or it's like you can literally watch the, in this one, like 10 second interview, he was like, I'll be a villain. And then just fucking goes for it. Like fucking leans right, right into it. He says like, Eric's so naive. on the rest of the show where like anytime he's nearby any kind of confrontation now he like has to dip his fucking toe in it and like it makes these like wild faces whenever eric says like anything like what i you guys hearing this too right all right let's fucking talk about lee okay so uh eric does get the eric gets the rose. Eric gets the rose, which shuts Lee the fuck up. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:28 So, there's a lot of stuff, Lee stuff, that happened in the last week. I can't believe it's just been in the last week. It must have, like, started popping off right after the episode went up. I think it did, yeah. He is, he's a big piece of shit. He had a lot of tweets from 2015 and 2016. Yeah, they're sexist and racist. So I want to go off a Refinery29 article here by Caitlin Flynn, Bachelorette contestant Lee Garrett,
Starting point is 01:04:52 shares how he was cast, which I don't really give as much of a shit about that particular angle, but that he tweeted some really shitty stuff about Black Lives Matter, feminism, Islam, and the LGBTQ community over the last two years or so. really shitty stuff about black lives matter feminism islam and the lgbtq community um over the last two years or so so like god his fucking twitter profile picture is him wearing a cowboy hat sitting in front of an american flag uh what's the difference between the naacp and the kkk wait for it one has the sense of shame to cover their racist ass faces like fucking holy it's it's not just like um disagreeable views
Starting point is 01:05:27 it's like actively like very very very racist yeah shit um yeah i mean you you could always you couldn't always but sometimes you can make the argument that someone is just raised in a small town and ignorant but no he is hostile he's hostile about it like it's it's it's the type of twitter person who's like goes, goes out and, like, makes sure that, like, whenever they can get a hand on the racist ball, the bigot ball, they, like, make sure that they fucking wade into it. There's stuff, a lot of stuff about the election, as you might imagine, a lot of stuff about feminism and Black Lives Matter. a lot of stuff about uh feminism and black lives matter uh he yeah i'm torn because i don't want to read his fucking tweets but like i think it is important for context he says when is the last time you actually saw a pretty feminist there is a reason for this cool cool cool cool cool he fucking sucks right like these these views are not just like oh he's uh he's conservative so let's
Starting point is 01:06:21 fucking like shame him or whatever the argument has become did producers know about this when they cast him it seems like they would have to know because it seems like they would have to do research or at least look at twitter accounts this is this is either like where the cast where the casting directors and the people who decided to put lee on this show really in inept and really really bad at their fucking jobs or are they assholes and i i in whenever we talk about this stuff i almost always assume assholes like i almost always assume like this was a this was a thing that was sought out or at the very least known about and it was well it's the first black lead and the most diverse cast that we've ever had let's see what happens when we add
Starting point is 01:07:10 this this huge bigot let's see what happens there hasn't been there hasn't been much from like the show proper about this stuff chris harrison tweeted and said for those asking no of course we didn't know about the offensive tweet from lee's accounts none of us were aware of them very unfortunate yeah it's pretty fucking unfortunate um but i i don't know that we've heard much from like the actual like creators of of the show about this we haven't heard like are y'all gonna do anything about kind of implies guilt a little bit a little bit and like obviously like this show happened a long time ago so it's not like you can walk into the house right now and kick leave the fuck out i get it but like um this this this is this is the thing this fucking show is doing and maybe it used to do it more back when like i didn't watch it and wasn't as critical about it but like this isn't
Starting point is 01:08:00 watch the first few seasons the first few seasons they didn't manufacture drama the way they do now. No, this isn't, I'm not even talking about the manufactured drama. I'm talking about, okay, so like Lee did an interview with the Hollywood Reporter, which again, like, I don't take his word for fucking anything, of course, but he says that he was scouted. He says that he wasn't really interested in trying out for The Bachelorette, but that like a casting person reached out to him. He didn't know that Rachel was going out for The Bachelorette, but that, like, a casting person reached out to him. He didn't know that Rachel was going to be The Bachelorette,
Starting point is 01:08:28 but he has some bullshit about how excited he was. And so, like, if that's true, fuck me. Like, you didn't even audition. They sought you out? Gee, I wonder why. Yeah. It's, it's,'s it sucks it sucks like it's it's this because this isn't like the the stark contrast between uh fucking bazinga and the other dudes whose name i fortunately have already
Starting point is 01:08:59 forgotten their whole drama to like this person who is now obviously going to be the villain now for at least a bit until he gets kicked off the show um is is it's really galling because it's fucking it's fucking it's rot all over again it's obviously it's a different type of thing but it's like this show it does a really dangerous thing when it conflates entertainment television villainy with actual fucking super harmful, super, super shitty and super real stuff. That's a great distinction. And one thing somebody pointed out in the group, the villain, quote unquote, from Nick's season was Corinne. Yeah. Like, it's, from Nick's season was Corinne. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:49 Like, it's, there's no comparison. And there was some problematic stuff that happened there, too. But, like, this is a different thing. It's a good comparison. But, like, Corinne, like, there was obviously some gross stuff there with, like, her and Taylor. Yeah, but not against a whole population of people several populations of of of of people unless that more that like this dude's a fucking bigot piece of shit he's a he's an he's an absolute ghoul and this show for whatever reason if if he's telling the truth sought him out maybe they didn't but even if he's telling the truth, sought him out, maybe they didn't. But even if he slipped
Starting point is 01:10:25 through the regular casting process, that's still kind of appalling, is now on this show where he's a villain. And this show, sorry, y'all, loves its villains. Yeah, well, and that's the dangerous thing about the villain character is that they do it every season. And so it's only natural to try and put them all in a big box together but that box is getting pretty scary lately it's a shitty box it's not like oh this guy is just kind of a jerk it's like this guy is dangerous and you've put him in this category with other people he used to be relatively harmless right like on one end of that box is fucking dumb old justin the rated r reality star who like walked through a bush wearing a boot on his foot because he got caught with a girlfriend and on the other side of it is like this one dude who's like really abusive and
Starting point is 01:11:17 then this one dude who's like a fucking huge bigot and it's like those like, those two aren't even in the same genus. Yeah. Just what happens in the rest of this episode is like, I felt wicked uncomfortable watching it. And based on the preview for the next episode, and God, I hope that's as far as it gets, it's going to be wicked uncomfortable, which this is actually a good time for us to mention, I'm not going to be on the next episode of Rosebuddies. I think Travis is going to fill in because I'll be at E3. I wanted to announce that with more pomp and circumstance.
Starting point is 01:11:51 Okay, well, I just did. But like, it's really, it's not enjoyable. It's not enjoyable to watch. It's like really, it's really upsetting. Because now it and maybe it would have looked like this if we didn't know about like all these tweets just looks like a fucking racist white dude being racist to like some black guys on a television show that's what it looks like and that's what it looks like it's gonna be next week and like that sucks especially on this season it i i think that there's probably an argument that somebody makes that's completely off base
Starting point is 01:12:31 about like well if they shut him down then this show's making a powerful statement about now this season is about like a a black woman like being fucking in in charge and being desired and like yeah the fact that somebody made the apparently conscious choice to say like well what if there's like a huge uh racist who thinks that the naacp is racist and thinks that black lives matter is a terrorist organization um is trying to win her heart to maybe get married at the end like it's so fucked it's so fucked yeah it sounds like i don't know i griffin and i obviously we're not um we're not super idealistic about this show but i like to think that they are giving the leads a fair shot at finding love and it makes me mad when it becomes clear
Starting point is 01:13:28 that a lot of these producers are cynical and they don't care at all about that and also you can't not fucking talk about race on this season basically at all guys and then also have a fucking racist on the show go fuck yourself yourself. You don't get to not have this awesome cake and then fucking shit where the cake should be and actually show us that shit. It fucking sucks. Everything about this sucks, man. This is the kind of shit that like
Starting point is 01:13:55 when Rod was happening and then it looked like he was gonna come back for Bip a second time and like was on Bip even the first time and I was like, this is the kind of shit that's gonna make me stop watching this show someday this show's gonna go on until the heat death of the universe and I'm gonna stop watching it someday and like it's not
Starting point is 01:14:11 it's not fucking it's not fucking fun when this shit happens obviously like obviously that's low on my list of concerns is like oh no it's tarnished my enjoyment for the show but it it fucking sucks like everything about this sucks i i am optimistic based on that based on that so we do see a trailer for and well i guess we'll
Starting point is 01:14:33 go home yeah just because we see like a lot of the dudes confronting him and i'm so what we saw in the trailer was like um a lot of the a lot of the black men in the house were like, hey, we see a thing with Will saying like, so there is like a a public image of of black men that you are playing into. And then Lee just like flashes his shit eating grin. We see Kenny say, whisper, Lee, you're a B word to him. So like, it seems like this thing is probably going to snowball next week and i hope it doesn't go any further than this but like the fact this dude made on the show at all is like a real big bummer so at the end of this episode we get a cocktail party yeah that is to be continued um during the cocktail party eric um ends up confronting a lot of the guys because iggy decides to go to rachel
Starting point is 01:15:28 and explain his issues with eric and how he's concerned that eric um doesn't believe that she's really investing in the process iggy like lies like iggy straight up lies like says like yeah he said that you were uh he's what eric said i can't remember how real do you think she's taking this uh and rachel says oh that's that's fine you know like i understand i have no problem with that and then he like he like doubles down and it's like yeah he said that he didn't think you were being genuine or that you he had concerns about whether you were being genuine which isn't what he said, but Iggy just wanted to get a fucking little word in edgewise there. Yeah, and so then Iggy goes to tell Eric, oh, hey, by the way, I just told on you.
Starting point is 01:16:12 And Eric said, why would you do that? Why are you talking about me? What does that have to do with you? And Iggy's like, well, I just feel like you have a lot to figure out. And Eric's like, well, I just feel like, you know, you have a lot to figure out. And Eric's like, well, that's great for me. And I mean, I appreciate the concern and the advice, but what does that have to do with me and Rachel? And then Eric decides to go back to the room because Lee also brings up his concerns to Rachel. And then Rachel decides to look for Eric and say,
Starting point is 01:16:50 Hey, what's going on? I mean, I'm going to let you keep your rose, but I, I have my antenna up because I'm worried that I'm hearing all this stuff from the other guys. And that's when Eric,
Starting point is 01:16:59 so Eric gathers up like everybody in the house and says, like, I don't know what I did to like, make everybody start targeting me like this, but likeathers up, like, everybody in the house and says, like, I don't know what I did to, like, make everybody start targeting me like this, but, like, it sucks and focus on your own shit and keep my name out of your mouth. Yeah, he's like, don't make it about me. Like, if you have time with her, like, it's not about me. Like, make it about you. Like, we are good.
Starting point is 01:17:21 You don't have to be concerned about whether or not, like, I'm here for the right reason. Like, we're good. You don't have to be concerned about whether or not like I'm here for the right reason. And this whole time, like we keep getting these fucking shots of Lee just like, all right, man. Okay. Like, really, really just like, I mean, he's antagonizing him to like get him worked up. So that he will so that he'll yell more and that she will walk in on eric yelling and then maybe that'll be the ball which is like yeah eric eric's kind of starts saying you know um because the guy starts saying what's it's not about you eric it's not about you and he's like what is about me because my name is in your mouth he says um i you i don't know if you all think i'm a threat and this is when lee just like starts screaming at him also like this is this is what i'm saying like lee is so not fucking invested in this like there is no reason for him to do this unless he's just actively antagonizing eric to get him like to get him to yell more he's just like we're all threats yeah just like shouting at him uh and the the confrontation just
Starting point is 01:18:28 kind of like keeps building and building yeah it escalates and then we get a to be continued and we get kind of a preview of the continued cocktail party from next week where it sounds like there's a lot of division that continues in the house and a lot of people confronting lee which like yeah uh so and then we also get the booger roll i feel so weird to now talk about the booger roll but one of the dudes is a model brady brady brody bran brady brandle yeah he in the nice little after show snippet, he explains how to model as if you have just picked your nose. It's great. So, I don't know, man. Do you think this fucking, do you think the people who make this show are ever going to like, in the after the final rose shit, it's got to like, right?
Starting point is 01:19:20 It's got to, hey, Lee, what's up? Oh, man. Hey, what's up? The NAACP is the same as the kkk can you can you tell me more about that like it's gonna that's gonna come up right and like tell all for sure the men tell all that's what i meant like there's no right now this show and the people who make it seems like they're just kind of keeping their fucking head down and like just trying to power through this whole lee thing and they will not be able to do that at the men men tell all and
Starting point is 01:19:50 i just i i just want to know how much of this they'll deny any responsibility and they'll make lee into their scapegoat like we had nothing to do with this. Isn't Lee terrible? Let's tear him apart on TV. That's what'll happen. Yeah. Not that Lee deserves anything better, but I just, I know the show, the show will protect itself. It just, there has to be, there has to be some, like, accountability. Well, I, I'm just so desperately curious about, like, what the process was for getting this fucking dude on the show and where that process broke down and like until this show says otherwise and i don't know too many people who disagree with this i'm just going to assume this was all intentional this this let's
Starting point is 01:20:38 put this let's make this whole thing boil over by throwing a genuine racist in the mix and see if anybody notices as a cool social experiment like that's what i assume you fucking did and all of that just it it it stinks on ice the rest of the episode was so fucking good though got a lot of good kenny moments good kenny moments good alex moments good peter moment in there what was the good peter moment i just had some nice time on the couch. A lot of good Rachel moments. All the Rachel moments are good. Oh, God.
Starting point is 01:21:10 When Rachel said goodbye to Demario, I fell in love with her. It was good. She cussed. She cussed and it made me happy. That was the Rose Buddies. Well, Rachel, see you next week. And come to Polygon, though, for all the hot video game scoops I'm going to be dishing
Starting point is 01:21:26 and go to maxfun.maxwimfun.org and go click on all the free podcasts there and go listen to them you're going to like them a lot and go to macroshows.com and you can see other stuff we make we haven't been to the PO box in a while I'm sorry
Starting point is 01:21:38 oh shit folks we've been busy we've been real busy I think that's about it, though. Anything else? Nope, that's it. All right, we'll see you next time. Go join the Rosebuddies Facebook group.
Starting point is 01:21:49 It's real fun. Until next time, I'm Griffin McElroy. I'm Rachel McElroy. When you're ready. Stay with us on this journey of joy. Spoiler alert. She is up with Soulja Boy. Right reasons.
Starting point is 01:22:02 Right reasons. Three big girls. All four seasons. boy maximum fun.org comedy and culture artist owned listener supported podcasts podcasts podcasts they're audio programs that tell smart stories in innovative ways using editing techniques like this. Like this. Like this. But let's face it, all that smart stuff can be exhausting. That's where Stop Podcasting Yourself comes in.
Starting point is 01:22:35 It's so stupid. It's just two stupid dinguses being dumb idiot jerks for 90 minutes. Stop Podcasting Yourself. The stupid show that smart people love. Find it on iTunes or MaximumFun.org.

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