Wonderful! - Wonderful! 274: You're Frasier Now

Episode Date: May 3, 2023

Rachel's favorite sitcom staple! Griffin's favorite achievable-ish sports feat!Music: “Money Won’t Pay” by bo en and Augustus – https://open.spotify.com/album/7n6zRzTrGPIHt0kRvmWoyaBrady Unite...d: https://www.bradyunited.org/ MaxFunDrive ends on March 29, 2024! Support our show now by becoming a member at maximumfun.org/join.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, this is Rachel McElroy. Hello, this is Griffin McElroy. And this is Wonderful. This is Wonderful. Welcome to Wonderful. This is it. You've made it here. Hopefully you didn't get lost. I know the directions we give people are a little arcane. Like go where it feels right. Yes. And then turn into your joy. Right. And then stop at the anger. When you reach anger, you definitely have gone too far. And do a U-turn. Although sometimes I've noticed that podcasts and radio shows, people like it when they piss them off a little bit.
Starting point is 00:00:57 Have you noticed that? Who's they? You know, like people who listen to radio and podcasts, like they like to get riled up and pissed off a little bit when you say stuff like that the listeners yeah yeah yeah oh okay our listeners all the time are always talking about like i wish you guys pissed us off more and razzed us more um and pissed us off more and so maybe that could be like a new a paint that we paint with on our canvas of like hey jerk that's that sounds right to me. Okay, yeah. I didn't know if we were supposed to have hot takes on things that we liked. No, I mean, I think we don't change the content of the show or of our hearts or of our character.
Starting point is 00:01:36 But I do think we frame things like, what's up? Today we're talking about laser tag. Isn't that fun? You jerk at home? Well, no, I don't think you would say you jerk at home. Okay. Because that sounds more like an observation. Or we could do more like, hey, we really like laser tag,
Starting point is 00:01:50 and everyone that doesn't is an idiot. Oh, that could be. That feels like it changes the message. I'm not about the message changing. I'm about the messenger. Do you know what that means? Do you know what that means? Because I don't, and I wish I could use some help. You lost me. Do you have what that means? Do you know what that means? Because I don't, and I wish I could use some help.
Starting point is 00:02:06 Yeah, you lost me. Do you have any small wonders? Can you go first? No, because I don't think of one. It's a real standoff we got here. I'm going to say it's rare, but when you do have a pleasant airplane neighbor encounter, that's always very nice.
Starting point is 00:02:31 Oh, did this happen to you? Yeah. On one of the flights on this tour that we were on, I think it was when we were flying from San Jose to Denver, I was sat next to... Wait, you guys didn't sit next to each other? No, we didn't. We were just sort of scattered hither and yon.
Starting point is 00:02:44 Okay. But I was sitting next to this older man, and I was playing video games on my Steam Deck next to him, and when I kind of finished, he tapped me on the shoulder and was like, what's the thumbstick fidelity like on those things? And I was like, whoa, I don't know how to answer that. I'm pretty deep in the scene. And he was like, what kind of graphics card does it use?
Starting point is 00:03:03 And I was like, I don't actually know. I'm not really great with stuff like that. That's why I i bought the steam deck because it kind of handles that stuff for you and then we got into a conversation and he was a pretty hardcore pc gamer whoa a lot about uh that kind of stuff we don't play you know our paths haven't crossed on the battlefield uh he plays a lot you didn't exchange tags we didn't trade tags no we didn't um tags. No, we didn't. But it was nice. It was unexpected. Everyone's a gamer now in 2023,
Starting point is 00:03:33 but I wasn't expecting this gentleman just sort of by the way he was, by the way he comported himself to have feelings about the NVIDIA 4080 Ti series um it was fun it was a fun it was a nice little encounter people that i think dad mentioned because dad was sitting behind me like it seemed like you had a nice talk with the guy next to you um okay i'm gonna bring up a small wonder that i came up with so it's gonna sound a little bit like a brag, but I'm proud of it. So when Griffin left town, one thing I was worried about is bedtime because Henry's bedtime routine pretty much revolves around Griffin. That's just kind of the way it's shaken out since Gus was born yeah and so i had this idea that anytime griffin leaves town if he can record just like a
Starting point is 00:04:26 30 second video for henry and we'd have a new one each night to show up bedtime and it was a huge success yeah sure it was like it was nice for both of us because like he had something to look forward to and it kind of like allowed him to connect with you before bed in a way that he would typically um and it gave me some comfort too, because I knew that like, we couldn't call you. Like if he was like, there was one,
Starting point is 00:04:50 there was one time when you left town when he kind of put up a, like a protest and we basically hung out until Griffin finished his show so we could call him. And I was like, well, we can't do that again. Cause he was up until like 10 o'clock at night. But this video thing worked great. And I was like, well, we can't do that again. No, that was rough. Because he was up until like 10 o'clock at night. But this video thing worked great.
Starting point is 00:05:08 And I thought it was a good idea on my part. It was a great idea on your part. And I would recommend it to anybody else who has a partner that travels. Just have them make a little video. I do feel self-conscious every time I do one of those videos because I don't know exactly what kind of game to spit. I just told you, stay positive.
Starting point is 00:05:26 If you miss him too much or get a little too maudlin, it makes him sad. But if you're just like, hey, let's dream about this crazy thing and I can't wait till we get back and I can do X, then that's great.
Starting point is 00:05:42 I'm glad that I was able to help in some way yeah i always feel so so so bad whenever i'm not there yeah i mean this was a tough one um because you were gone for a long time but like yeah we did it yeah it's a whole mess we did it but we did it you go first this week cool what you got? The thing I have this week was kind of tricky to research because I didn't find like the helpful, you know, like beefy article about it. You know how it's like nice to have like one really good like, you know, New York Times article to hang your hat on? Yes. So I didn't find that.
Starting point is 00:06:23 But what I wanted to talk about was the live studio audience okay yeah um this is something that has always had a lot of like like mystery to me sure it seemed super cool you know because i've never been to like a taping of anything you're talking about sort of in the in the uh like sitcom tradition yeah or like talk show or game show right have you ever been to like a taping of anything no i went to um wait is that true i may have nothing springs to mind immediately i did tour like the studios at Nickelodeon Studios in Orlando, Florida, where they made some shows. Oh, you know what? Did At Midnight have a live studio audience?
Starting point is 00:07:12 Do you remember? Yes, but I was in that. So that wasn't necessarily. Yeah, but I mean, what was that like? Uncomfortable. I didn't care for it. Yeah, I have known people that have gone to tapings of shows. It's surprisingly accessible to do.
Starting point is 00:07:32 Sure, if you live in New York or LA or places where they do tapings of shows. Yeah, there's this website called OneIota. And you can just, they like list things that are upcoming. And you just like click on like Jimmy Kimmel Live and then it'll give you a calendar. And then you pick the day and you say request tickets. I will say with the WGA strike that has just gone into effect, I will imagine that it will be tougher to get into one of those events. This website is also where I found out where they're doing a Frasier reboot. Did you know about this?
Starting point is 00:08:02 I feel like I didn't learn that. There was like a... But I knew it like in my DNA. I was researching yesterday. Like it's a little website and has little stills and you click on it.
Starting point is 00:08:14 And there was one for Frasier and I was like, what? And I clicked on it and it was just like Frasier's back. Sold out through 2039. Yeah, well now the icon's gone.
Starting point is 00:08:22 So I don't know what happened. I do believe that the writer's strike is going to affect probably Frasier. True. I mean, the rest of the shows are on here. Unless it is an experimental, live, improvisational theater experience of Frasier, which sounds cool, like an immersive, you show up, you're in the Seattle apartment. Oh, you're Frasier now. You're Frasier now.
Starting point is 00:08:44 That's cool. cool everybody wears there's like 30 people at a time that go in everybody wears fraser masks uh-huh and you go in and you have to like figure out who the real fraser is and maybe someone gets killed at some point you're launched out of uh his dad's recliner into a pit of coffee. Whoa. Because they do that. Yeah, they drink a lot of Joe on that show. Yeah. And then you have to swing from a long necktie.
Starting point is 00:09:16 Oh, wow. Into the- With your hands, though, right? Uh-huh. Okay, yeah. Into the embrace of a Niles right any nile any niles there's a lot of niles is there too can't get david hyde pierce probably for this for this when you know i'm saying when you enter you either get a frazier mask or a niles mask oh cool and you
Starting point is 00:09:38 have to like find oh that's cool and you have to find your counterpart that's great i like this should we stop recording and we should we stop recording and work on this? We should probably stop recording and work on this. Yeah. Just real quick, what would we call this experience? I wish you wouldn't put me on the spot. I know. Sometimes it really pays off, though.
Starting point is 00:10:01 This is not going to be one of those times. I mean, it's like tossed salad and... That's the obvious thing, but there's... You wanted to do something like phrase-perience, or like I'm listening and you are too. There's options. Give me to the end of the show. Okay. If I could just have to the end of the show
Starting point is 00:10:25 you know i'm not going to be dialed in for the rest of the episode though unfortunately even during my own bit i'm going to have like debt like half my money well and also the you're working at a disadvantage here because you've never watched fraser huge issue for me okay so most early radio shows like before there was television there were radio programs most of them had audiences so the idea of like listening or enjoying a program with an alive audience was not unfamiliar but the first television show to do it was i love lucy oh really yeah they they started doing the multi-camera setup and i guess desi Arnaz was real instrumental in making this happen. And so it was like,
Starting point is 00:11:08 you know, they had, they had different angles and people could perform it more like a stage play and people could watch and react. And, and that was kind of what jumpstarted it. Um, I've never thought about that specifically for the sitcom.
Starting point is 00:11:20 I will say, I've never thought about someone doing that first. That must be, that must be that must have been a wild experience to be like okay so we're gonna go out there and we're gonna make the television show and people are going to watch and laugh and cheer or boo do you think they even had the applause sign yet or you think after the first taping they're like we have to show them when to laugh and clap please i have to imagine they did. Okay. This around this time, probably unsurprisingly, is when they developed the laugh track. Right.
Starting point is 00:11:48 Which was if, you know, if people didn't laugh enough, there was a CBS sound engineer that developed a machine full of taped laugh tracks that he could use to dub over the actual audience reaction. dub over the actual audience reaction damn that must that job must really drive you bonkers to just like sit in a sound booth listening to different types of human laughter all day as you get on the ones and twos and try to mix together something that sounds like a pro how do you decide like okay so that that joke right there that's a seven we're gonna press a seven on nothing too wild but like they must have like a big red button on the Big Bang Theory that just says Bazinga on it. That like detonates like the hardest laughter that exists. It's funny that you talk about that. That kept coming up a lot because that was one of the like few remaining sitcoms that still used a live audience.
Starting point is 00:12:39 Was Bazinga? Not Bazinga. What if the show was just called Bazinga? That would probably pull in more viewers, honestly. And his catchphrase was, the Big Bang Theory. That show ended in 2019, which I didn't realize. But it was still using like a live audience. Although they did do a little sweetening of the pot, apparently.
Starting point is 00:12:58 Yeah, I remember seeing clips of how it ended with a new Big Bang happening. And it was like sort of like this universe is time coming to a close. And then like, they were that sort of the last remnants of life before sort of the heat death of the universe. And it all collapsed back into make like a, another bazinga.
Starting point is 00:13:17 And it was like very like, uh, it was like 2001 space odyssey, very like, and then young Sheldon was born out of a pod. Young Sheldon came out of the event horizon. This episode's getting weird, huh? Yeah, man.
Starting point is 00:13:35 Okay, so the live studio audience. So this was really big when we were kids. I was thinking a lot about the shows like, the shows that like parents didn't like their kids watching specifically and it was easy to identify them because there was always a lot of like okay so like i'm married with children yeah or saved by the bell i remember if i was watching saved by the bell i would always turn the volume down because as soon as that loud woo would happen it was like a signal to my parents. Okay, but you must understand, this is not a universal, like my parents had no beef with Zack Morris and his cadre.
Starting point is 00:14:15 It was not like they were upset with the content. They were more disappointed in my interest. Oh, Rachel. Because the show itself itself objectively not good but as a young person listen to you listen to 2023 rachel looking back at 1992 rachel and just raising lifting her nose up as a young person it felt like a window into high school and it was very exciting to think that this might be what high school was like if only i know jesus but the loud woos whenever there was a kiss or whenever an attractive person was on screen
Starting point is 00:14:49 yeah was was really like i mean it was bracing to hear that woo this is very funny to me because i don't possess that hang up about the woo sound that is made on tv shows and i feel like you have maybe without even knowing it thrown open the saloon doors into your soul and life and history and upbringing that you lived in fear of the loud woo loud sound that is a sort of sympathetic response to That is a sort of sympathetic response to exhibitions of intimacy on television shows. Wow, we are really cracking this wide open. Maybe we are a little bit. I was also thinking of like Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, I think, is all time probably best live studio audience experience.
Starting point is 00:15:38 Well, you know, I was reading about it. And I remember this because we did, of course, watch the reunion special. Right. Was that they would do a lot of performing in between takes. Sure, yeah. about it and i remember this because we did of course watch the reunion special right um was that they would do a lot of performing in between takes like to keep the audience hype it apparently was filmed on like friday night and like you know there are a lot of performers on stage like singers and dancers and and they would go for it i love uh and i don't know why i've seen as many of these as i have but like footage from the last night of taping of like a finale of a Fresh Prince of Bel-Air or a Friends.
Starting point is 00:16:10 I remember I watched one for Growing Pains once, a show for which I had very little affinity, but just seeing like, you know, all that squad. Why can't I not? Kirk Cameron and, oh shit. Alan Thicke. Alan Thicke. God, I can't believe not kurt cameron and uh oh shit alan thick alan thick god i can't believe i couldn't remember his name uh just having a tearful goodbye to the audience is always very powerful i know yeah so the thing that i thought was interesting i found a lot of like people
Starting point is 00:16:41 writing individual articles about their experience on a taping um one came from a 2015 slate article um and they talk about how they went to tapings of every late night show um so like late night talk show right um and they talk about the process of being an audience member and how you like you stand in line and then you get a wristband and then you come back and then you're put in a room and you're in the room for a while. And then you are brought into the actual studio and there's like a warm up process with like a warm up comedian, which is not something I ever really knew about until recently. But yeah, like a comedian comes out and like apparently just like gets you like that's pretty standard protocol ready to laugh yeah for for a late night show what a what a stressful like job that must be no i know well
Starting point is 00:17:38 and and then there's some guidance on like applauding and laughing and they like tell you what to expect and what to do. If you could, sorry to derail this, but if you could attend a live taping of any television show throughout history that has been off the air, still on the air, if there's one show that you could have attended in person, what would it have been? Does it have to be a show that I had an audience?
Starting point is 00:18:08 Or it couldn't be any show? Yes, my love. It would be fucking bonkers if you were like, I wish I was in the audience for Succession. Well, you're making up this premise. There could be any rule. I'm just saying it would be great if there was like two characters kiss on Succession
Starting point is 00:18:21 and then in the background, you just hear Rachel's disembodied voice like, woo! Oh, man. two characters kiss on succession and then in the background you just hear rachel's disembodied voice like oh man i mean you you are putting me on the spot i don't i don't feel doesn't feel good does it no it doesn't i still don't think i don't have a name for the live fraser experience i mean you would really have to know more about fraser right gosh now that's what i'm thinking about again um okay so here's the thing about that time period like there were a lot of shows that had the live audience right a lot of them don't really hold up no i mean my instinct if i'm honest is to say seinfeld which i know is not like one of your favorite shows but was like a very important
Starting point is 00:19:06 show, I think, for my family anyway, when I was growing up. Did that have a live? Yeah. It did? Oh, yeah. I guess I just always assumed it was not a live. I thought it was just a laugh track sort of solely. No, there's a live audience.
Starting point is 00:19:20 I would say Conan, like old. Oh, I didn't know talk shows were on the table. Oh, yeah, sure. I thought it was just sitcoms. Oh, no, no. Yeah, no, I would have loved to go to Conan. Yeah. audience uh i would say conan like old old oh i didn't know talk shows were on the table oh yeah sure i thought it was just sitcoms oh no no yeah no i would have loved to go to conan yeah that's the best or sorry alive yeah it depends on the yeah i guess on the episode specific era yeah here's the thing i thought was interesting i was reading a lot and i kept coming across friends because of course that was a huge deal and each episode typically took up to six hours of filming because they would redo takes and change the script. And people would be given sandwiches because they were asked to stay there the whole time.
Starting point is 00:20:00 That's wild. So they would have up to 300 people sitting in the audience. like they would change the sets and that would take 20 minutes. Jesus Christ. You got to think around hour six. I know. When Ross says that joke the 15th time. I know. It's hard to probably gin up a good giggle out of that one.
Starting point is 00:20:20 I was also reading Frommers had like a testimonial from somebody who went to a a will and grace taping oh i bet that was wild uh and yeah it was the same kind of thing like six to seven hours um of of sitting there and watching them like make changes and do it again and not being allowed to look at your phones or anything. God, Darma and Greg, I bet tore it up. So all of this kind of dissipated in the 2000s. This is when like The Office, 30 Rock, Parks and Rec, like this kind of more documentary style show or single camera yeah that just didn't
Starting point is 00:21:07 have a live audience there was a more of a like a trust in the viewer to know when to laugh and that laughing wasn't required i remember when malcolm in the middle came out it was so yeah like why is nobody laughing at brian cranson's great jokes yeah malcolm the middle scrubs um life with chris i think was in that same sort of era. Yeah. And it was just kind of like a shift away. And so now, as of a couple of years ago, there's not many left. But of course, talk shows still.
Starting point is 00:21:37 During the pandemic, nobody had an audience. And that was interesting to watch. Man, we're about to get into that. I mean, I don't know what the plans are, but like during the first writer's strike, the way that talk show kind of weirdly zombified around that event was wild. I saw a clip yesterday that I had forgotten about, but it was Conan just spinning his wedding ring on the desk.
Starting point is 00:22:04 Did you ever see this clip? No. He would just spin his wedding ring on the desk. Did you ever see this clip? No. He would just spin his wedding ring on his desk, and people would just cheer as they watched the wedding ring spin because there was no writer's room to speak of. Wow. Yeah. Anyway, that's a great topic,
Starting point is 00:22:19 and it does make me wish I had ever attended something like that. I know. Yeah, I think, I mean, six, seven hours. No. No, thank you. Absolutely not. But I'm always, you know, I was like one of those people and I get the DVD and I would watch the behind the scenes and the bloopers and whatever.
Starting point is 00:22:36 And so I'm always interested in that kind of stuff. I think it would be cool. Yeah. Can I show you away? Yes. The following pro wrestling contest is scheduled for one fall. Making their way to the ring for the tights and fights podcast are the baddest trio of audio. The hair to beware, Danielle Radford.
Starting point is 00:23:08 It really is great hair. The Brit with a permit to hit, Lindsay Kell. The queen is dead, long live the queen. And the fast-talking, fist-clocking Hal Upland. See, I can wrestle and be an announcer. Get ready for tights and fights. Listen every Saturday or face the pain. Find us on Maximum Fun.
Starting point is 00:23:32 Don't ring the bell. Hey, when you listen to podcasts, it really just comes down to whether or not you like the sound of everyone's voices. My voice is one of the sounds you'll hear on the podcast Dr. Game Show, and this is the voice of co-host and fearless leader Joe Firestone. This is a podcast where we play games submitted by listeners, and we play them with callers over Zoom we've never spoken to in our lives. So that is basically the concept of this show. Pretty chill. So take it or leave it, bucko. And here's what some of the listeners have to say.
Starting point is 00:24:11 It's funny, wholesome, and it never fails to make me smile. I just started listening and I'm already binging it. I haven't laughed this hard in ages. I wish I discovered it sooner. You can find Dr. Game Show on MaximumFun.org. Can I talk about my thing? Yeah. Wow. What happened there?
Starting point is 00:24:28 Still trying to think of a name for the Frasier experience. Let's pause. I don't think it's there, babe. The coffee shop they went to was called Cafe Nervosa. The fact that you know that is. I watched Frasier. Took place in Seattle. I know.
Starting point is 00:24:50 Yes. I'm just, I'm just, I'm putting out, you know, opportunities for you to latch on to something. Okay. Crane was the last name. Crane was the last name. Martin Frasier Niles. Maris Daphne. The dog's name was Eddie.
Starting point is 00:25:09 Yeah. There was a chair. There's nothing funny about this. He had a, he used to say, I'm listening. I don't remember what his show was called. His little radio show. It was a Cheers spinoff. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 00:25:26 Listeners, don't tweet at us because we're not really active on Twitter anymore. But we're open to suggestions for this great new idea we have. That we can't come up with a name for. No, I'm saying that we could, you know, write in wonderfulpodcasts at gmail.com.
Starting point is 00:25:48 What if it's just something like Inside Frasier, Crane? Inside Frasier. Yeah, I mean, that's not funny, but... Deep Inside Frasier. What if we call it Get Deep Inside Frasier? Get Deep Inside Frasier. And then it's like a Being John Malkovich type thing. Oh, you crawl in, you open a little... Door, and then you're Inside Frasier. And then it's like a being John Malkovich type thing. Oh, you crawl in, you open a little door
Starting point is 00:26:07 and then you're inside Frasier. But I really liked our idea with the Frasier masks and the Niles masks and you had to find- No, everyone would still be, you could still do that. But you would crawl in a door. Yeah. Okay. What's your topic?
Starting point is 00:26:20 Sports. Talking about getting a hole in one. Yeah, okay. Did you watch the video that I sent you? I did watch the video. I was confused as to what I was watching because it did not appear to be like a golf game. It appeared to be more like a skills competition. No, it was a golf tournament.
Starting point is 00:26:35 It was? It was so rowdy. I assumed it was like a- It was very rowdy. Let me preface this by saying that I am not like a golf watcher. No, and you've only- I've played golf like three times in my life. And I do like it. I do think it is when you if you can sort of divorce it from the culture of
Starting point is 00:26:52 golf, hitting a ball with a club and seeing it go a long way and trying to get it in a small hole. That's pretty fun. Yeah. Okay. And arguably, it's pretty fun. But I don't seek out golf experiences in my personal life. But the existence of the hole in one is pretty wonderful to me. This it was just at this course in Adelaide. And he takes his shot and boom, goes right in. And this crowd of rowdy Australian golfing fans pops off in a way that I did not know was possible for professional golf. I found myself thinking a lot about like, is this the standard response? Is this how you do it? Or did one person get excited
Starting point is 00:27:50 and throw something on the course and everybody was like, that's a great idea. What's great is everybody throws their beers at the golf, like they're plastic cups of beer, not bottles. It's not roadhouse, but everybody had these plastic cups of beer and just as soon as it goes in everybody just fucking chucks it just launches their beer and so now the course is covered in
Starting point is 00:28:10 plastic cups and the dude is soaking wet with beer and it's not like you know a tape a live taping of like the man show or something like that like by all appearances like it's a golf tournament like a golf well it made me wonder, did people have to go after him? The cleanup must have taken a substantial time. The cleanup must have been pretty bad, yeah. This was hole 12, so it's not like this was the last hole and we were the last one to do it. And they're like, yeah, let's trash this wedding dress.
Starting point is 00:28:35 It just turns into fucking bedlam. And someone rips their shirt off and starts waving it around in the crowd. That's why I assumed it was a skills competition because it seemed like this is not a golf game. Like this is a party. Maybe that's just how they do it at this particular golf tournament. But no, it appears to have just been a game of golf. What's really fun about a hole-in-one to me conceptually is it is like without a doubt, it is by definition the best you can do in a single hole yeah golf right uh and when you compare it to other similar sorts of big wins in other sports
Starting point is 00:29:15 like nothing else in my mind really compares right like a grand slam in baseball a walk-off grand slam very exciting but that happens somewhat frequently right like you you see those you know in all the time uh when somebody like returns a kickoff for a touchdown runs you know 100 yards and scores touchdown that's exciting it's thrilling it's great but i you also see it happen with regularity um yeah but there's an organization called the national hole-in-one registry which as far as i can tell just lets players of any level uh who score a hole-in-one uh register that hole-in-one online what course they were on what hole they were on what club they used what kind of yardage it was and then you can buy like a commemorative certificate for your hole-in-one which i personally
Starting point is 00:30:11 think is a i had the same response of that's adorable yeah i'm sure there's also a hundred of these organizations that are like you can get a commemorative plate uh with your face on it and you can get a special box that will hold your special ball and it's it will cost you two hundred dollars yeah that you will send to us but then everybody will know forever that you did a good job at golf this one time that would be great to like walk into an office and somebody has like their degrees on the wall and then right next to it is their hole in one registry um so according to this registry the odds of an average golfer uh acing a hole getting a hole-in-one are 12,500 to one which seems very specific to the point
Starting point is 00:30:52 where it's made up um pro golfers they say the number is 3,000 to one which also seems made up but more concrete is on average most courses on earth uh report 10 to 15 holes in one per year. Wow. Which is not a lot. One sort of fun fact, your handicap in golf is sort of like your ELO chess rating. That is like a measurement of your general skill level at golf. It is basically like on average how far above par you shoot um and so the average handicap of a golfer who scores a hole-in-one is 14 which is
Starting point is 00:31:35 pretty middle of the road that means like on average you score 14 above par on a course which is not great that's like not what a pro golfer does what that basically translates to is it's pretty random who is scoring holes in one like obviously you need to know how to hit how to drive the ball forward and hit it forward and hit it hard enough for it to make its way towards that general area but beyond that it's not like you have to be fucking incredible at golf to score a hole in one it is there's a huge element of randomness yeah the ball bounces how the wind carries it just anybody you know with a limited amount of golfing skill could be eligible to score a hole true yeah and i love that i love that will it ever happen for me no probably not because i'm not very good at driving
Starting point is 00:32:25 uh do i aspire to score a home one no not really um because that would statistically law of large numbers i would have to play more golf than i care to um well you know what's interesting is like unlike bowling a perfect game yeah like you are far away from that hole you're very very far so you're like seeing it on a screen so there's something about that of like like a surrealness to it of just like i know that that's my ball but my eyes could not perceive that right in person and you get a microcosm of that from mini golf right like for me i love mini golf we were watching uh married at first sight and they're in gatlinburg so of course like there's like a mini golf date that they go on because gatlinburg
Starting point is 00:33:11 is just like i don't in my mind the mini golf capital of the world um and when you hit the ball and then you can't see where it goes and you're like where's my ball and then you look in the hole and you're like oh shit i got a hole in one yeah that's exciting but it's probably not as exciting as when you hit it you know 250 yards yeah uh that seems like a right amount of yards that does seem like a good amount of yards so okay there is a there is i i think i'm talking about this because i'm more fascinated by this the existence of this incredibly rare feat of this like statistical anomaly that ordinary people can one day find themselves, you know, the recipient of. But it is also a sliding scale based on how big the course is and how far off, you know, the green is from the T. the courses and how far off, you know, the green is from the tee.
Starting point is 00:34:08 Usually on a par three is when you see most holes in one. That's sort of the basic starting par for like on a regular size golf course. That gives you, you know, one shot to drive it pretty far, one shot to get it on the green and then one putt to make it in the hole. That's what a par three just drives. Yeah, makes sense. So usually, you know, you drive it really fucking far and it just happens to bounce in a silly way and it goes in the hole and you get a hole in one. When you're two under par, that's called an eagle. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:31 I love bird names in golf. That's very, very fun. But on a par four, a hole in one is called a double eagle or an albatross. Oh. Because you're three under par. Yeah. And it's way rarer because you know it's such a longer distance yeah yeah yeah on a par five if you score a hole in one you are four under par and it's called
Starting point is 00:34:53 a condor and a condor has only happened five times in official recorded golf history wow because it's such a huge amount of space and it usually has some freak a squall of wind it lands on a bird's back and rolls off and tumbles down a you know it hits the bumper of a car and bounces off it's like some real like a happy gilmore slapstick level uh twist of fate the thing that happens and it's only happened a small number of times uh in 2012 there was a 59 year old florida woman who scored two holes in one in the same round of golf which according to this hole-in-one registry uh only has a one in 67 million chance of ever happening that's fun just this 59 year old florida woman not a pro golfer just was just like on a trip
Starting point is 00:35:46 with some uh she like works at a college and was on a trip with some of her co-workers playing golf and then scored two holes in one and everybody was like holy shit wow i read this interview with her where like she almost got a third one and at that point she was like yeah i mean after you score two you're like off the planet like anything's after the third one just kind of makes sense after that you've already scored two holes in one um i just i i obviously will never experience anything like this um but i do just find it very fascinating that it exists and then i also find it adorable when like you know i just uh just like an old man is like this is the best day of my whole life frame this ball forever yeah uh i think that that is lovely and kind of incomparable
Starting point is 00:36:35 in all of sports yeah you can find this clip of this man scoring uh getting a hole-in-one at this australian golf tournament it really is It really is a delight to see how very excited people get to witness a hole-in-one. I have to imagine that even that is a rarity. That's it for the show. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you to Bowen and Augustus for the use of our theme song, Money Won't Pay. You can find a link to that in the episode description. What did our listeners write in?
Starting point is 00:37:00 I'm so glad that you've asked that because I have it pulled up right here on my phone definitely uh logan says uh my small wonder is finding a song with a beat that perfectly fits your walking speed mine recently have been don't you forget about me and got weird by dodie uh extremely satisfying addition to my walk to and from the metro that is the best sometimes i do catch myself if i feel like I'm getting close, like trying to change my own date. Yeah, oh, for sure. This is equivalent to the turn signal click lining up with a song. I've always wondered if there's a BPM for the turn signal that is standardized. I have to imagine no. I do know that when you are looking for playlists for fitness, you can put the running time or the pace that you want.
Starting point is 00:37:49 Oh, that's interesting. And you can find music by the pace. Yeah. Here's one from Kai who says, Pearl couscous is wonderful. It's like Dippin' Dots, but for pasta. That's very strong. I do like a couscous. I do. Yeah. I like a couscous. I do.
Starting point is 00:38:05 Yeah. I like some couscous. Okay. It has to be. It has to be. I feel like I've had a lot of mushy couscous. Yeah, it's got to be fluffy. I've had too much mushy couscous.
Starting point is 00:38:19 I've had too much mushy couscous. Why can't I say mushy couscous? Why can't I say mushy couscous? Yeah, you've got to separate a little bit. Mushycoos. I'm done. Thanks for listening so much. Can I run two by you right now?
Starting point is 00:38:31 Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think Crane. I think there's something with Crane. Yeah, I think so too. So I was either thinking like the Crane game, like, you know. Oh, that could be cool. Like, you know, where you would win a toy kind of thing. Oh, that could be cool.
Starting point is 00:38:43 Like where you would win a toy kind of thing. Or like R-Crane instead of Arcade. Something with crane. Say it again. R-Crane. A-R-Crane. No. Or the crane game.
Starting point is 00:38:57 What about the crane game? The crane game is good. It's powerful. I hadn't thought about it as gamifying this live Frasier Theater experience. It feels that way to me. Yeah, sure. No, I think definitely there could be. There's something there.
Starting point is 00:39:12 Maybe we tie flag football into it. Like if somebody snatches your necktie off your neck, you lose. You're dead or whatever. And maybe it is a death game. And if you do get your necktie taken away from you, you die in real life. That could be. Yes. And it's a million dollars a ticket. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:35 Only the world. People love Squid Games. Squid Games is huge right now. And people love Frasier. And people love Frasier. So maybe we just call it Frasier Squid Games. Frasier Squid Games could be it. Thank you so much for listening.
Starting point is 00:39:48 Thanks to Maximum Fun for having us on the network. Go to MaximumFun.org. Check out all the shows that they got there. We have merch, new merch here in the month of May. Got some beautiful Nalgenes for you. If you go to Macaroni.com, check those out. And got some live shows coming up here
Starting point is 00:40:06 in a couple weeks from Bim Bam and Taz coming to Columbus and Milwaukee. And we got some more shows coming up later in the year. So if you go to
Starting point is 00:40:16 macaroon.family you can find links to all those too. That's it. That's it. We'll see you in the Frasier Crane Games. Watch your,
Starting point is 00:40:23 protect your neck. Hey! Working on it! Money on it! Working on it! Money on it! Working on it! Money on it! MaximumFun.org Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Audience supported.

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