WTF with Marc Maron Podcast - Episode 1150 - Kieran Culkin
Episode Date: August 20, 2020A lot is going on for Kieran Culkin right now. He's a new dad, he has an Emmy nomination, he's dealing with life during the pandemic like the rest of us. But chaos is familiar to Kieran, who grew up i...n a railroad apartment with six brothers and sisters, all of whom were pushed toward show business by their father. Kieran and Marc talk about that childhood environment, why Kieran and his brothers love pro wrestling, and how he established himself as an actor, including in his role as Roman Roy on Succession. Sign up here for WTF+ to get the full show archives and weekly bonus material! https://plus.acast.com/s/wtf-with-marc-maron-podcast. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Lock the gate!
All right, let's do this. How are you, what the fuckers? What the fuck buddies? What the fucksters? What's happening? happening i'm mark maron this is my podcast
wtf welcome to it we've been going at it for a while now we're in our 11th year almost at the
end of the 11th year of this is that true 2009 in the fall an ongoing conversation twice a week for 11 years or so almost 11 years
with me and you and me and people that come in here and you and everyone's involved
either they're in here or they're i'm talking to them on uh on the video
and we're doing it we're getting through it aren, aren't we? I can't, I have no more bandwidth, folks,
for fucking sad, scary shit.
I have no, I just have limited bandwidth.
The whole goddamn thing, the needles are going all over the place.
Just like, full on.
just like full on i just i just trip myself out some sort of hyper dread hyper anxiety and then it's just and then it's almost like a riddling effect i just kind of
get exhausted now i'm plodding through 110 degree temperatures out here what's going on where you are is the sky
on fire the fucking sky's on fire so now on top of everything else authoritarianism
fucking insanity the future of the country the future of the planet i gotta worry about my house
burning down again didn't burn down before but it's just the worry of it. But how are you?
No, seriously, I'm sorry. I'm taking up too much time. I got a lot to be grateful for.
I'm sober. I got some money saved up. I'm working. I have good friends. Do you do that? Do you have
a gratitude list? All of those things make impending doom pleasant.
Money in the bank, good friends, a nice place to live. Yes, I understand that. So I'm not complaining. I'm grateful. My particular impending doom period is relatively comfortable.
Today, I talked to, shortly, I will talk to Kieran Culkin. He's an Emmy-nominated actor now for playing Roman Roy in Succession.
You guys know him from that or Igby Goes Down, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World,
the Home Alone movies with his brother Macaulay.
If you want to do a little homework or a little backup work,
I interviewed Macaulay back on episode 883, I believe, if you want to go listen to that.
I like the guy. I like the Kieran Culkin. I've always liked him. I see him. I'm like, that kid seems like a solid kid.
Good presence on the screen. Got a little bit of an attitude. I'd like to talk to that kid.
And now I get to talk to that kid.
I'm having some issues with my cap. I don't know if I'm making them up.
I got one cat left.
I went and picked up Monkey in a box.
I got Monkey in a box.
And I got Lafonda in a box.
And the same company, I think, cremated them, but they changed their boxes.
So now I got two different types of boxes with the same cute little wooden name tags.
I like it.
I'm glad that they're in different boxes.
One's a sort of a homemade paper outside box.
Like it looks, it's got that on the exterior.
The other one's just a shinier box with fondas.
And I got them out.
Is that weird to have them out?
Am I supposed to hide them?
They're nice boxes with nice wooden name tags on them.
I got a little weird sculpture of a cat doing a yoga pose or just sitting cross-legged.
And it's next to that, the two of them, brother and sister.
But I still got Buster here.
And now Buster is being showered with more attention than he's
ever had from me and I'm not sure he likes me I just don't uh I don't know I think he liked being
neglected I think he liked having um a buffer there's no old man buffer it's just one it's an
old man human and uh and that guy and Buster I don't know what to make of it I think he looks
for monkey sometimes I think he smells where monkey was
I think he
I see him sitting where monkey was sitting
It makes me very sad
That we're both looking
And knowing
We're both knowing that our friend is gone
But his is a little different
I gotta be careful not to project too much human feelings on him
I gotta not make assumptions That he's experiencing whatever he's experiencing like a human.
Obviously, he likes me.
I feed him.
But it's a little weird.
It's a little weird.
I mean, monkey I was with for 16 years and we had an understanding.
I don't think I've reached an understanding with this cat.
And he's a weirdo.
But he'll fetch.
Which is cool.
Did I mention my car got recalled?
Some things in it that were not safe.
Need the car.
Need to be able to drive away if I have to.
Drive somewhere.
Let's turn the fucking phone off
oh my god this has just come up on my phone California hit by nearly 11,000 lightning
strikes sparking more than 350 fires as thousands flee over the last 72 hours and I don't have a
fucking car gotta get out gonna get out so this show i as you've noticed
brian cox has been on i've talked to uh sarah snook kieran culkin is part of some dynasty uh
a strange acting dynasty that i didn't think he would talk about but he fucking he talked about it. I walked to the fucking Ralph's supermarket in 108 degrees yesterday.
And it's weird when you start the walk in 108 degrees, you're like, no, it's not so bad.
But then when it comes down on you, it's almost like all the moisture leaves your body.
And you're walking through invisible sludge.
And you're walking through invisible sludge.
And I carried a fucking watermelon home.
Like I'm some kind of hero.
In 109 degrees temperature, I walked four blocks, bought a watermelon, and walked it four blocks home.
Hero. Hero.
Got to knock on those watermelons.
I don't know how you're doing it,
but I've figured out a way.
It looks stupid.
I'll remind people.
I hold it up, stick my ear on it,
knock on it with the other hand.
And if it sounds like a wooden door,
that's your fucking ticket.
That's your watermelon.
Okay, let's just do this.
Please be careful out there.
Don't burn up.
All right?
I don't even know what I'm encouraging you to stay alive for,
but let's do it together.
All right, so Kieran Culkin is nominated for an Emmy
for Best Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
in the role of Roman Roy on Succession.
This is me and Kieran Culkin coming up.
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Hey, man.
Hello.
How's it going?
I'm here. I can't believe I fucking made it. I think I'm only one minute late, which is a fucking miracle. How's it going? I'm here.
I can't believe I fucking made it.
I think I'm only one minute late, which is a fucking miracle.
It's crazy.
Like, the baby woke up an hour earlier than we thought while my wife's sandwiches arrived 20 minutes late.
So there was the, I'll hold the baby while you slice the cucumber and eat a sandwich.
And then she finishes the sandwich.
I got to go.
She's got to shit.
So shower and then the old shit. Do I have to go. She's got to shit. So shower and then the old shit.
Do I have coffee?
Oh, fuck, I do.
I said I was running 10 minutes late
and then I realized, no, wait, I'm wearing a shirt.
I got coffee.
What the fuck am I saying?
I don't have to be late.
I'm here.
You just have to walk down the hall.
I even have like, you should check this shit out.
I got like lights, like proper fucking,
these lights behind me.
I have a green screen that I can pull up. I shot something
here, and they let me keep all this very
expensive equipment, and now I have to
throw it out, I guess. I don't know why.
Well, you can, once you figure out how to
use it. I mean, you're, you know, relatively
intelligent person, right?
Not with that stuff. I feel like I learned how to
use the VCR and the DVD player
and laser discs. Once, like, we got to
streaming services, I just don't know
how they work. What's going
on, man? You all right?
Ah.
Yes.
One of those, you're not
supposed to complain, so I just really try to not
complain. Everything's great.
How old's the kid? 11 months yesterday.
So it's like tiny.
It's like a little kid.
She's amazing.
Yeah.
But it's, yeah, it's one of those, oh, okay, I need to be ready at 2.15.
I'll give myself a half an hour because really I need 10 minutes and that's what things,
things don't work that way.
And I feel like I've heard other parents say, like, you can't say let's do something at
2.30.
It's let's do something between two and four.
And it doesn't matter how
much experience i get and how much we plan i'll just never be on time i was today i was one minute
late i'm this is a miracle i feel like i forgot something no well is the the kid is with a human
yes so that's part yeah and i managed to change a shit diaper before i left too so i felt like
okay at least i did something my poor wife just has a wrong day.
I can't really imagine it.
I don't have kids and I'm an old man and I didn't have any.
And I don't regret it.
And when I hear about it, it sounds exciting, but I still don't.
Like nothing you're saying is making me go, ah, fuck, I should have.
That honestly was the same way I felt.
It is the greatest thing in the world.
So it really is like, I would tell you it's definitely worth it.
But I can imagine myself having not had kids and go, yeah, why would I want to do that?
Why would I want to not have sleep, not be able to do the things I want to do and just
be stressed all the time and fighting with my wife?
Why would I want to do that?
And you made it to however old you are without it.
Yeah, I got to, I got to be 37.
I did the whole single life shit.
And then it's weird because then we have a kid and then she starts crawling around and walking.
And I go, here's another thing I never thought I'd do.
Let's buy a house upstate.
Now I want a freaking pool and a backyard and all this shit that I never wanted.
We're not going to get it.
Have you been looking?
We started to, and then my wife sort of had a panic of like,
why would I do that?
Like, why would I move to a big house where nobody is around me?
Well, I mean, you know, we'll see how everything unfolds.
It might be the best solution.
I don't know.
I haven't figured this out.
Yeah, I mean, so you had the kid.
So the kid was like, what, six months old?
And then all of a sudden it's like, you can't leave your house.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was, that was it.
And that was kind of nuts.
And we have a tiny, uh, like 600 square foot, one bedroom apartment that I moved into when
I was 19, when I moved out of my mom's house.
Um, and then have that place.
We're still there.
But what I did is about a month after the lockdown, I rented this little studio here
downstairs.
Yeah. Which extra money at it. And that was for three reasons. That was to,
in case one of us got sick and we had to self quarantine, it was for work things like this and to get my fucking face out of my wife's face. That's sort of a loose quote.
So what, from her?
What, so do you have any furniture in that room,
or is it just the lights that you stole and a desk?
This is kind of disgusting.
The last tenant left the bed, and the super was like,
oh, I'll get rid of this.
I said, no, it's all right.
So I bought a rubber mattress cover that still stinks,
so the bed just smells of rubber, and I put our clean sheets on it.
And then whenever somebody throws out furniture,
because since this thing happened, so many people in this building have moved out so they just leave their furniture in the lobby and i'll grab it i have a nightstand i got a desk
um i got all sorts of shit that people throw out i just drag it into this apartment wipe it down
with you know yeah the antibacterial wipes i could find were like pineapple smell so this
apartment smells like rubber and pina colada. It's disgusting.
Man, it sounds like you're living the life.
It's so fucking glamorous.
I'm also getting fat as shit while I'm wearing this neckerchief.
Oh, that's not a face mask?
That's to hide your second chin?
It's actually a face mask, but it does do both.
But now that I've mentioned it, I've got to get rid of it so I can't be that mean.
Yeah, I put on about five myself, and I'm kind of obsessing about that today i don't know what the fuck to
do about it that's it five yeah five what'd you put on closer to 15 and i've lost a couple i
threw the scale away because i was tired of looking at it and yeah because he when you when
you got nothing to do you can look at it a few times a day right i just don't want and then it's
like oh that's inaccurate there's no way there's no way i weigh that and then i just put on like this my sleep time shirt
you know the shirt that's really big and it's my belly is pushing it out so it's hanging off the
side of my body so that's how i judge it it's like can i wear and i can only wear this has like
already my daughter's got food on it i it was one of the few like two or three shirts i can wear so i always weigh myself like i make this is how fucking nuts i
am when i'm in it because i was i was okay for a while and then you know shit got sad and dark
here and i started eating everything like i'll i'll make sure i pee like right when i get up
i'll pee out like i'll get on a scale and if it it's like one, like 178.5, I'll go piss and get back on the scale and be like 178.
I'm okay with that.
You know, and then start my, I have to do it right when I get up and I have to make sure there's no liquid in me.
I take my watch off.
Makes it shave your body hair.
Just get the cleaning, shave your eyes. your body hair. It's that crazy. I'm close to my goal weight.
You're supposed to exercise too. I even saw a commercial yesterday for
some sort of workout. I don't even know what it was for. I just saw a bunch of people working out.
Who the hell is exercising? You're not going to the gym. I guess people that have a gym in their
house. I go up I go at the
mountain there I go hiking and shit I'm definitely trying to you know stay active because I don't
yeah I'm here alone you've got you're engaged with an infant and a wife and emotions and things
yeah we're in Manhattan so it's like okay we got to go out. So pack up the stroller and start walking, but try to keep six foot distance.
And why isn't that asshole wearing a mask?
Right.
Do the siblings have kids?
I can't remember.
I talked to your brother.
I talked to Macaulay.
Does he have one?
He doesn't have one, does he?
No, no.
I'm the first.
And who knows?
Probably only because when they hear my escapades, I think they might have the same sort of reaction you do of like, why would I do that?
I have to speak honestly, because this isn't just trying to cover my try.
It really is like I don't sleep.
But when I wake up exhausted, I just think of my daughter's face.
And it's really like I know it sounds corny and whatever.
I had a friend who had kids who said it's every cliche you've ever heard. Cause it just is like, she, the meaning of everything. So when I go up to
that apartment, she sees me and she just gets this big smile and slaps. She crawls really fast over
to me and just tries to crawl up me desperately, like pick me up. And it's the greatest feeling
in the world. Well, that's good, man.
I'm happy for you.
How long have you been with your wife?
Almost nine years.
Oh, my God.
So take that, then nine years of being together and put us in a tiny apartment during a pandemic
with a baby that wasn't sleeping and say,
hey, you two, get along.
Right.
What does she do?
Is she in the biz?
No, no, she's not.
She worked, she's one of those,
like she worked in advertising,
but I never was quite sure what she did.
Just sort of like the music side of advertising.
Yeah, I don't know what that means.
You know, people say things.
You would be surprised how many people I talk to
that aren't really sure what their parents did.
Yeah, that's a good call.
I know my mom worked nights and she worked
for like an answering service, which took till I was 30 to finally ask her and say, what does that
mean? It's an answering service. Well, they used to exist answering services. I remember like you
could, you know, it was a number you call, they'd pick up your, like my dad was a doctor.
So he had an answering service and he'd have to call the answering service to see if anyone called, you know, now we have, you know, voicemail.
Yeah.
It was like hospitals and stuff too.
But also she said she did a lot of like, um, for casting people, like, like the casting
people would tell her who got the part and she would reach out or, you know, something
like that.
Oh, really?
Yeah. She talked to a lot of actors. She says she remembers calling a few actors to tell them they had the part in something really and like a fun experience for her yeah so it's a specific type
of answering service yeah i guess now i got a question for you and just like because i it was
struck my mind when i was coming over here now i i know you guys don't like talking about your
old man but did he think did he think
that did he think he had a racket going like was he like i'm gonna make all of these like was it a
big plan like because it seems to me if you're gonna make a plan to make money you know making
seven kids act is not the most lucrative idea yeah well yeah that's actually a good point because
like how the hell is that going to work?
He struggled his whole life to do it himself. Now he's going to
try to throw seven kids at the wall and see what
sticks. Yeah, I'm trying to figure out
what was the intention. He's like,
I'm going to make a million bucks
on these fucking kids.
That's a good point.
The problem is my memories of that are
from the perspective of a seven,
eight, nine-year-old.
I try to process that. Looking back on it, the problem is my memories of that are from the perspective of a seven, eight, nine year old. So I, you know, yeah.
But looking back on it, I mean, do you think, do you think it was, you know,
it was cause he had like, it was,
he was so narcissistic that you were all just an extension of his desire to
succeed in what he chose.
There's that possibility.
I also feel like they were just drowning in kids and life.
What they, my parents' sort of life was, when I remember it was, they had this very, very small apartment.
It was a railroad apartment, is that what they call them?
Right, all the way through?
No separating doors except for the bathroom, and the door didn't properly shut all the way, and there was no shower, just like a rusted tub.
So literally no boundaries emotional or
physical this is an apartment that is barely suitable for a couple and they put seven kids in
it they slept on a mattress on the floor next to the crib and then the next section of the
apartment was four bunk beds that house six of the other kids and then the kitchen and it was like
and i've seen pictures of it when i see like childhood pictures like oh look how cute oh
birthday god this place is filthy,
but like,
I can't blame my mom.
When does she going to have time?
And I say my mom,
cause I don't call my dad ever cleaning my mom.
Like she worked nights.
She would work all night at this answering service.
Sometimes she would bring a kid with her,
like the baby and then come home in the morning,
get the kids and husband ready,
husband to work,
kids to school.
And then the younger kids,
some nursing, the others she's looking after and try to clean the place and then i just don't think she
slept for several years yeah you do that and then go to work at night and then i think my father was
i think the only thing he ever really did was acting and he um that didn't really work and
then i think at one point he's quite literally drowning in his life uh I
don't know if it was like well you know you know sometimes people on the farm put their young kids
to work because they just need some help it could have been like I don't know how to feed you guys
so just help afford for food it really could have just been that my mom said they could never
afford rent for the last like two months of the year.
And I think the landlord or whatever just would let it go.
Because he basically saw their life and was like, yeah, if I called child services, they would just take your kids away.
They would have, right?
Probably, yeah.
Why'd they have so many?
I mean, why didn't anyone put a stop to that?
Yeah, someone get, don't put a stop to that yeah someone get don't
put your dick in that like what yeah yeah who's gonna whose place is it you're 37 and you have
one how the fuck i don't unless they're orthodox jews or crazy catholics i don't know how someone
has seven fucking kids i don't know either i guess nothing else to do but smoke pot and bone
i i don't know like and we did go to Catholic school, but we weren't really like very religious. I think we did that because my father was able to get some sort of hookup. Like he worked for the church and his kids were able to go to that school.
Oh, okay. So he was brought up Catholic, that guy.
I guess. Yeah. But again, we weren't very religious unless it was like Easter and then we'd all for some reason go to fucking mass or whatever.
Would you character?
Were they like hippie guys?
Was he a hippie guy?
I guess so.
Kind of.
Yeah.
I just can't fathom it.
So many kids.
It's like he created this kind of like weird little actor sweatshop child labor thing.
It's like because, again, I don't really know.
So it's me trying to piece it together, it was because he was sort of in that world,
even though he hadn't worked for a few years.
Neighbor friends were running like an off-off-Broadway theater company on the Upper East Side.
And whenever they needed a kid, they would think like, oh, well, these guys, they have like seven of them.
Like, what age do you want? What gender? Just fucking pick one.
You want two, three? Take them. Here's an understudy.
And so I think it sort of started like that.
And then if I remember, my father just had a camera
and took our like headshots out in the park one day.
And there's with my brother, Mac,
like there's some with him with glasses.
He doesn't wear glasses, but it was just like to,
you know, do these, he can play a kid with glasses.
And you know, I don't know if we went to open call auditions
or what, but I do remember like going into auditions and my father kind of coaching
me on like what to say or what to do,
like walk in and hand you the headshot,
even though that wasn't what you were supposed to do.
But they thought that was adorable for a six year old to like hand over his
resume and headshot.
So how old were you when,
like when Mac got the,
the big gig?
I'm alone.
Yeah.
Oof, seven, I think.
God damn, man.
I can't imagine the shift after that fucking thing hit for everybody.
I mean, it must have been crazy.
Because that was like all over the place.
I mean, it obviously put the zap on his head a little bit.
But I mean, just as the rest of the family, I mean, it was all over the place.
Yeah, it was, it was nuts.
And it was able to sort of register that and understand it, but also,
you know,
You're still a kid.
Yeah.
So I remember thinking the house we lived in was huge because,
and I thought it was lucky because I had a trunk of toys, you know,
and then suddenly we're moving into a brownstone.
I'm like, how'd this happen? People live yes holy shit oh he's famous he's hosting saturday night live cool it's crazy and
you do wait so when was the first time you were like that was you were like how did it work was
it because i know that at some point all you guys had the same agent is that how it worked
probably i mean my father tried to like get everybody
at different times like into the business
and some just like would not.
Like I remember my sister Cody,
like basically the equivalent of like clutching
onto the doorway, like don't make me audition.
Like she just wouldn't do it.
And my brother Chris was sort of the same way,
but he sort of pushed all of us a little bit.
My brother Shane was on Broadway as a kid in our town.
And so he sort of had that trajectory at a young age and it was,
I don't know,
like my wife telling me that she said she saw me on the cover of like a
DVD and saw my name.
She goes,
Oh,
I guess he's,
I guess he's trying to act now.
He's trying to jump on the bandwagon.
Like actually I've been doing it for the same amount of time.
But, you know, that's a fair sort of assessment.
But like my I guess my question was, was it sort of like, you know, when when one of you would get a part, if they needed a brother or a sister, they'd be like, we got we got the real ones you want.
Yeah, like my brother Rory plays like a younger version of me in a movie and a younger version of Mac in a movie.
He also plays Mac's younger brother in a movie.
He's playing younger brother in a movie.
Like, you know, I play brothers.
Yeah, there's things like that.
My brother Chris and I play brothers in a movie.
There's a lot of like, hey, look no further.
You can get two for one here.
Yeah.
But what is it?
Did any of you guys really?
Because, like, it seems like you all fit on screen pretty well, or the three that I can draw to memory of you. And it seems to be a genetic thing for some people. I don't know how it works. Were you guys really trained, any of you?
It was one of those, it wasn't until I was in my 30s, I would say, when I finally gave up on the thought of, I'm probably going to go to school for this.
I kept thinking, maybe I should learn how to do what I've been doing for the last 15 years.
Eventually, I just went, I guess I'm already doing it. It's fine.
You were doing it at a pretty high level.
Yeah, I guess. If you think think, like, if you think about it,
why is it so natural?
I mean, I don't know if that's a question that's answerable.
Is it?
I mean, because Macaulay didn't take classes either, did he?
No, nobody in the family did any of that stuff.
What the fuck?
Like, when you were kids, what were you doing?
Was it performative?
Did you guys go to school or anything?
Yeah, definitely went to school.
To me, it's funny because it feels like a normal childhood,
even though if I look back on it, it probably wasn't,
but I don't really know what normal fucking means anyway.
Yeah, I mean, unless you were like,
I think that most people think their childhood is okay
unless there's
trauma you know what i mean that's what seems to fuck up people's memory it's like it was pretty
good except for the time i got locked in a closet for a week by my grandfather you know what i mean
and that could actually ruin the entire childhood i've talked to people totally
they tell me one experience they had and i'm like oh that actually ruined
their entire childhood yeah it just corrupted their memory of it yeah yeah definitely I had a nice childhood um I there were so many
kids I mean you didn't have to you didn't have to go out and find friends there was you just
walked down the hall that's exactly right there was always someone to play with but there were
friends at school school was fun summers were fun I actually liked being on set. The only part that was ever hard was like if I was shooting something when I was nine,
like shooting, I was in Father of the Bride in LA at the Sheridan Universal Hotel, which
is a box of a room that I was sharing with my dad for like three months.
And I was like, the set is fun.
This little pillbox of a room is not.
They gave you a shit room?
I recently talked to Nancy Myers.
She's like, I'm sorry about that.
I was like, that's not your fault.
Let's put up in a hotel.
It's fine.
I was nine.
Yeah.
I had my little Ziploc bag of toys, which sounds really sad now I think about it.
Ziploc bag of toys.
Well, that hotel is like not by anything.
I mean, like, I don't even know what was the theme park was, I guess, open by that point.
But I know that hotel,
they used to put you up there.
Universal used to put you up there,
right?
Yeah.
And that was because it was right near the studio.
And it's not like I'm nine.
Like,
I'm not going to like,
where's the New Year's coffee shop?
Like,
I don't care.
Yeah.
But,
but was your dad difficult to live with for three months?
He doesn't,
he was the kind of guy who doesn't really bathe.
One of those guys who
you try to tell him he stinks. He's like, I smell human.
Which doesn't make sense.
He just bathed every now and again.
My mom has a memory.
He actually would. It sounds like
he just wouldn't bathe. Maybe about once
a year he would take a bath.
Come on. No, that's actually true.
He just didn't bathe.
He took a bath in the apartment once while we were all at school and my sister Cody she was a teenager she walked in my mom was there she walked in smelled the air and went ew did dad take a bath
and I remember like seeing there would be like layers of film like dirt film on the side of the
tub come on just an offensive man I think it was like I think it was a little bit like say something seeing there would be layers of film, like dirt film on the side of the tub. Come on.
Just an offensive man.
I think it was a little bit like,
say something.
Yeah, I know I stink,
and I'm waiting in line right next to you.
Say something.
I dare you.
You're sort of explaining a guy that clearly wasn't taking his acting career
too seriously.
You can't really go into an audition
and have the people go like,
what just happened in here?
What is that stink? He would be really great as the homeless guy maybe that's what he was going
for my mom says when she met him and asked what uh he did he said an actor and she immediately
said she looked at his teeth and thought he must be lying oh my god this guy seemed like he needed
help yeah he had teeth growing in sideways.
They were yellow and falling out.
He was also afraid of the dentist.
What the fuck?
This is fun.
I haven't like talked about him in a while.
Sounds like you're so,
it sounds like you're describing this weird,
you know,
like hermit that,
you know,
you all had to deal with.
Uh,
yeah,
I guess.
Yeah.
It's funny now.
Cause it's like,
now I'm a dad.
I'm like,
you know what?
I must not be doing such a bad job.
I at least shower every day day I take care of my feet
You don't talk to that guy at all?
No
He came to see
I did a play
Fucking six years ago I think
This is our youth
It was Broadway and he came to see that
And I hadn't seen him at that point for like 17 years or something like that.
And he came backstage and it was about a year after his stroke.
And last time I saw him, I was little.
So I just didn't know, like, you know, to me, he was still tall.
He had to climb up three flights of stairs to come see me.
And he was like 70, survived the stroke.
And the first thing I said when I saw him was like, holy shit, you really let yourself get old.
And dead serious, he was like leaning on a cane or an umbrella or some shit.
He's like, I did, Kieran, I did.
That's the fucking thing about the, and I'm assuming he's narcissistic.
It's like they're always going to like immediately try to suck you into their sadness.
Yeah, I actually thought it was kind of fun.
And he didn't.
Yeah, because I think he is one of those people.
I think you're right.
He kind of wants people to feel bad for him.
He tried to like really leaning on stuff.
And I was like, sit down or don't like.
And he hasn't like he hasn't started pestering you because you have a kid he doesn't want to see
the kid he doesn't want i'm not sure that he knows how to contact us really like i was in a show so
he knew he can go to that theater um but i don't know really so he's really out of the loop oh yeah
he has been forever yeah um my brother shane has some sort of loose contact with him so sometimes
like i got a letter from him after that, that I still haven't
read, actually, because I forgot about
until just now,
that he sent to my
brother Shane. So there's a little bit of contact.
So you can probably find out. I don't
know if he knows a kid, if he's a
grandpa. I don't know. You know, my
father, my brother has kids, and
he doesn't seem to really,
doesn't seem to move him much.
It's not changing him in any way.
He doesn't feel like he has to go spend time with the kids.
You've got to figure if they were shitty fathers,
maybe they'll be a good grandparent, or maybe they just won't give a shit.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I guess I just never had any expectations of that.
Sometimes you think that certain people are going to go crazy.
Like we had a kid and you think like all my sevens,
that's amazing.
But really some of them are like,
Oh cool.
Congratulations.
So what do you,
how's work?
How's the,
you know?
And some are just like crazy about like my brother,
Chris is like crazy about his niece.
Well,
that's nice.
You're really enthusiastic.
Yeah.
And others are like,
Oh,
she's really cute.
How are you like
you know I don't know it must be weird uh to to grow up in in a specific way that you did
you know I guess you would know how all your your siblings feel about children or about their
childhood but what was it that did you all connect around something did you have something you all
did because it sounds like the given your mother's you, busy all the time in a way, and your dad's like,
you know, kind of self-involved and smelly, what'd you guys do for fun at home?
Like everything, all the same thing. There was sort of a Wolfpack mentality a bit. I think
I watched some home videos that I found, like right when the lockdown started.
I remember there was like a video we had of St. Patrick's day.
So this was like right around St. Patrick's day.
So I tried to look at that and watching all this home video stuff.
And it would be like, we'd all be at the water park and you know,
there's seven of us. So we would always be like,
one was making sure the other one was here and there.
And it was like,
we were all taking care
of each other and looking after each other and there was always my mom was always holding one
baby and the other one was like latched to her and the one that was just a little too old was maybe
being held by the oldest brother and there was that kind of thing so it's funny because um
like it is like we're the only ones who understand our, whatever our weird situation was.
Right.
And it,
like,
I think my wife says sometimes she feels like the third wheel of like my
sister comes around or something.
Cause she just can't quite get in there with what sort of.
Oh,
you guys are locked in.
Yeah.
But we did like,
I remember having a nice childhood.
It was just like playing.
It was fun.
Like I still like,
you know,
like if we get together,
we'll still play the same old Nintendo games and stuff we used to play back then. Oh really? You have them? Oh, I have, I'm,
I'm apparently the collector when they outgrow the super Nintendo,
I get it and get the games and I just have,
I have everybody's old toys and game systems and shit. Oh really?
And you just, and you kind of pull them out when people come over?
Yeah, actually, I kind of play them by myself a lot, too.
Baby goes to sleep.
Aren't you guys all wrestling freaks, too?
Yeah, yeah.
That's, yeah, big, big wrestling fan.
And I've been the one that's been consistently a wrestling fan,
whereas the others have sort of been in and out.
But they're kind of obsessive.
How long have you been into the wrestling? I want to see WrestleMania 5 probably when the mega
powers collided um the mid 80s I would say mid to late 80s and then when the ultimate Warriors
his rise to fame when he took on Hulk Hogan when it was champion champion you know WrestleMania
6 of course were all you guys into it yeah and then like you know
one by one like my brother shane i think uh when he was like probably something like 13 there was
a character named the undertaker who showed up and i remember him looking at the cover of wwf
magazine he goes are we supposed to believe that this man is actually dead this is stupid and he
threw down the magazine and that was his exit from wrestling. Like he felt like his intelligence was being insulted.
That was the line, huh? You're not going to, there are no zombies.
Yeah. He's undead.
There's a guy who carries an urn and that's his source of power.
This is stupid.
What do you like? What do you think you,
what do you think locked you into it?
Do you just like the spectacle of it or the stories?
It's my favorite form of escape.
Really?
There's nothing.
I've never watched a wrestling. So sometimes
I'll watch a TV show and I
can't fully escape. I watch wrestling and
I'll never go, oh, that's exactly
like what I'm dealing with in my life.
There's just never, oh, I really
relate to this character because his struggles
are like, it just will never be that.
And it's a lot, you actually probably know this because I was going to ask you, have
you been watching wrestling since your show?
Not really.
You know, I've talked to wrestlers over the years.
Like, you know, I've interviewed, you know, we used to have Mick Foley.
Mick Foley, amazing, yeah.
Yeah, and, you know, because he used to, when I used to do political radio over at Air America,
you know, he's a very active guy.
He does a lot of causes and a real sweet guy.
But, you know, he walks in, he's huge, he lumbers in, he's just beaten,
he's almost disfigured most of the time, he's hobbled.
But he was a real deal.
He's missing an ear and a few teeth.
But in terms of the show in terms of
research it was never my thing as a as a kid but i did learn from these guys and i also talked to
colt cabana who does that kind of old school kind of retro uh independent wrestling which is like
no frills the story is within the match whereas like what you watch on tv it's like it's episodic
it's a soap opera and like you get a story that leads to the match whereas if you go to an indie show the story
is being told without words just in the ring with the rest of it you know yeah so i learned about
that stuff and i talked to um chavo the guy who trains the girls and his uncle was a big wrestler
guy so i talked to them on set but you, and I learned about the heel and I learned
about the dynamics of it.
And I had to, in the last season, I did a little reffing, but it was never my thing.
But I certainly understand and respect it because before I did glow, yeah, I would dismiss
it.
And, you know, that's problematic because relatively smart people like yourself and
my producer enjoy the wrestling.
Yeah.
It's really easy to take a look because people's memories of it are still from the 80s.
These really coked up, ripped guys going,
scream at the camera.
And like no one guy was actually a garbage man
who was a wrestler.
Like it was just like kind of horseshit silliness in the 80s.
And it's easy to look at that and just see that
and think that it's stupid.
But it's a lot less choreographed than people think.
It's a live performance, sometimes in front of 20 000 people and on live television
and where they know the result but they don't quite know how they're going to get there and
you see them with like the thing that really interests people when they don't know it is like
the referee has a little you know thing in his ear talking to a director in the back giving notes to them and making adjustments
these are real athletes in a fake sport doing you know plays without words it's kind of amazing
but when it's it's like the most embarrassing thing there are so many times weekly where i'm embarrassed to be a wrestling fan right yeah because it's just like that's not the stuff we
like they think we like this crap i want to see the wrestling like for example just the soap opera aspect of like i don't know like
you stole my girl or something sometimes the writers run out of ideas i had a few ones where
somebody accidentally spilled coffee on the other so he beat him up and that was how that's how they
started to feud it was just stupid or or when uh when it becomes more about the uh you'd rather they do
the acting without talking and just through wrestling as opposed to actually acting yeah
stop it already yeah like just just get just fight like okay i get it i actually fast forward now i'm
like oh okay so these guys are going to start having a feud okay i'll fast forward until the
match happens like shut up right um colt cabana I'll be enough of a practice to change it after this podcast,
but Colt Cabana is actually mine and my wife's safe word.
Is that true?
That's actually true, yeah.
Well, there you go.
I'm sure he'll be flattered somehow.
And yet it's good that you chose two words, you know?
Yeah. It just doesn't, you know.
Well, that's interesting.
So we can go from there to your relationship with,
with J. Smith Cameron on Succession.
Okay.
So.
From wrestling to.
Well, to safe word,
to the interesting sexual dynamic that you have with that character, who you know very well.
I mean, she's married to Kenny Lonergan.
And you guys, how did that relationship start with you and Kenneth Lonergan?
Well, he did a movie, You Can Count on Me, in 99 or 2000, that my brother Rory was in.
So, again, it's all like in the family.
He played the son, right? I just watched that again.
You can count on me? Yeah, he's the son.
He's Laura Linney's son.
Spectacular
freaking movie.
My mom likes to credit
herself
slash Rory with the fact that
right after that, Kenny and Jay had a
kid. She's's like I knew
it he wanted to hang out with his this kid now he wanted to keep him his own it's probably just not
true at all um but I remember him being around like you know he would take Rory out and play
dates and stuff like that so then I started working with him on This Is Our Youth I did like
four productions of that play over the course of like 12 years. Oh, I was going to mention him earlier. Cause he was one who said, uh,
after he had his daughter, um, I said, you know,
I was giving my reasons for not wanting to have a kid. And I said,
but isn't it like you don't get to do the stuff that you want? And he goes,
yeah, that's true. But your wants change. Like for example,
I'm having a nice time hanging out with you,
but I'd much rather be home with my daughter. Right.
Which was like, it was a way of
saying can we wrap this up i'm done talking um but yeah so i know i've known him for years and jay
uh i mean jay got cast in the show i was really pumped about it also her character was initially
written to be a man and she came in and auditioned and they like oh it's great and you didn't you weren't you going
in for some other character it was sent to me to read for cousin greg but i just was not at all
that guy like i saw firstly i saw that it was like greg 26 i was like 35 or some shit at the time
and i'm like okay i'm too old for this and i'm not not the guy but i like the
script enough to just keep reading yeah and saw the character roman was like oh shit well apparently
they weren't even reading romans at that time i just said uh well can i just put myself on tape
anyway so just pick like three scenes and sent it and that's how it went down yeah they weren't even
like looking at romans yet they were doing it in a certain order, I guess. So with Lonergan, because I've talked to him and he's, you know, a very intelligent, thoughtful guy and obviously a genius writer of theater.
I mean, is that relationship? Did you find that that was educational for you, having done all those plays with him?
Did he direct you many times as a child or was it just the the writing well i mean it was i think the first time i worked with
him i was 20 19 or 20 yeah uh he doesn't he's he didn't direct me in that i did i had a very
small part in his movie margaret uh yeah that's good you like this stoner boyfriend yeah yeah and
that was one where like yeah i really wanted part. And he wanted me for another one.
And there was like, this is before I knew him well,
but he was getting frustrated that I wouldn't audition for the part he wanted me to play.
And I just really want to audition for the other.
And it was one of those like, I'll let you audition for both,
but I'm never going to cast you as that.
And I was like, you know, I said, fine, I'll audition for both, but I'll never play that.
So it was eventually like a back and forth.
He eventually just offered me that other part.
And I said,
no,
let me audition for this one.
It took a lot of convincing.
Same with,
this is our youth.
Like he,
he told me eventually,
like he didn't want me to be cast as the part I ended up playing on
Broadway because I wasn't tall.
And that part is supposed to be tall.
That took a lot of,
you know,
convincing,
but he's,
I definitely a fucking genius um and i think he's
probably the best writer uh i've worked with um and he so this is working with him
it has taught me a lot but it's been so different from what i'm doing on succession because
kenny will tell you like you missed the comma in that sentence and I'll be
like well so what I think it flows better like this and he's like put the comma in you put the
comma in and it just changes the whole scene and he's right like you know you drop an uh in the
middle of a sentence and the line doesn't work the same it doesn't have the same meaning so he's
right he's ridiculous about how his words are to be said because he knows he you know right so that's what i'm used to um and then
again on the show succession where the writing is brilliant and i'll say something sorry i forgot to
put the uh in the middle and they're like fuck it do whatever you want it's fine i was just talking
to a friend of mine about succession and they were kind of like um but i had the same thing too
it's like oh i don't really like any of the people and it's like well you will because this is not a real landscape this
is a satire and and the and the language is elevated and eventually because of the language
which is sort of neutered from regular human emotions uh you'll find yourself sympathizing
with these people that are locked in these traps of this fucking you know wealth
and privilege
because I haven't figured out what it is that
makes me like attach these the thing
is I had the exact same thing when I was reading the
scripts and while we were shooting like
one two three four five episodes
into shooting and reading the scripts I was thinking
I mean I can tell this is good quality
the writing is great I feel like
we're doing a good job,
but I don't know who the hell is going to want to watch the show.
Somewhere around shooting like episode six,
I came home and my wife said, how was work?
And I said, I think it's good.
She's like, really?
That's the first time I heard you say that.
And I was like, yeah, I think we might have something here.
The thing about Succession, I think that what happens is,
is that somehow or another, I don't know who those guys are, but the language of it is specific and,
and it's, and it's calculated and it's designed that what I started to realize about it is that
these people don't talk like this, but this is about power. So like all this language,
all these jokes, all this sort of sarcasm is, is about power. And,
and these are still human beings, you know, trapped in this language. And, and, and that starts to,
I think, come out a few episodes in. I think it is natural language for them. I think this is,
this is what they were like, especially the siblings, they grew up around this kind of
language. So this is normal for them.
I don't think.
I guess, I guess you'd have to think that as an actor, but I still see it as,
uh, uh, like, uh, there,
there is an element of an exercise to it because like,
if you watch your character or any of the kids that when they do actually have
emotions within this language, know that you you feel
the intensity of it so much more because you're like oh look look there's a person in there
you're under it's funny because when they do get like sort of emotionally stumble on their words
and they kind of don't almost don't know what to say because they can't put up the wall of the
bullshit language that they learn like kendall gets really upset and starts going i'll chop your dick off and get an octopus jerk off your your your you just can't get it out because he's upset
right what's it like working with that guy oh here we go i'm gonna just talk a bunch of shit
about my fellow actors on a well they're all that seems like they're all pretty solid everybody everybody's
great and everybody has been um it's it's crazy everyone just has like a different process and
it's not just the actors but it really has this feel this is gonna sound like i'm i don't know
like they want me to say this shit this is just what it actually is this is a real actual dream
job because it everybody that shows up on
set everybody in every department it has come together to try to really make this thing because
they believe in it so it really does feel like a collaborative effort so what i'm doing and what we
me with like the other actors we were creating something with everyone else this is not like
an everyman for himself kind of right so it's pretty
it's pretty fantastic um and everybody has like a really different process you know and that to me
has been a lot of fun too like how well like my my process has sort of changed a bit because of
this show where i like oh you asked me earlier about like um i forget what you asked me about
i'm only half listening i'm just using it as a springboard.
I understand.
Yeah.
Not a problem.
No.
Happens all the time.
That's all this is.
It's like, I should probably ask you some things, but you know what?
This is a chance for me to talk about myself right now.
Yeah.
Would you please take the opportunity? Yeah.
To talk about yourself as an actor.
Since I've been doing it as a little kid like there's things like um i learn my lines really fast because i've been doing that i have
that muscle memory from being a very young kid i like can hit a mark without ever looking down or
i don't even know i don't even know where they put it down i'll just end up there these kind of
like weird little things so i on this
show i learned my lines like the morning of i don't even look at them i look at them like very
briefly i glance at them once or twice and go okay i think i've seen and then we just sort of
figure it out on the fly mine is a little more like i don't know not not at all planned i know
what the words are let's see what the room looks like let's see what the other actor does and let's
like throw some shit and add it and play and then someone like jay wants to basically talk about her
like everything she's you know she comes from theater a lot so she wants to talk about
why her character does something and you know what the scene means and where it's going
i just don't want to like think about what about jeremy jeremy jeremy he there's parts he's a little more it's a little more complex because
a lot of people just immediately say he's method and uh he would say that he's not but I don't
know for all intents and purposes I feel like he kind of is but there are things he doesn't want
to know sometimes um you know he doesn't want to know if the other actor is going to do blank
um that would mess him up uh sometimes he doesn't want you know if the other actor is going to do blank um that would mess him
up uh sometimes he doesn't want you to say certain words like don't call it a scene or things like
that so it can be pretty particular sometimes uh and then usually what my job is this is to sort of
like poke fun at him and try to break down that little wall i was like oh i'm sorry this scene
in this scene that we're going to rehearse and then shoot because it's a fucking TV show.
Like, I like to do that to him sometimes.
How does he respond to that?
Sometimes, well, so if Kendall is in a really good place,
then Jeremy is in a much more sort of like,
we're going to bebop and scat this scene kind of thing.
And if Kendall's in a dark place,
then it's very much don't talk to him.
Right. So that has its own challenges too. But again, I've been doing this scene kind of thing. And if Kendall's in a dark place, then it's very much don't talk to him. Right.
So that has its own challenges too.
But again, I've been doing this for over 30 years.
So it's like learning people's processes
and how to respect them.
Sometimes for me, it's a lot more fun
when another actor walks in a room,
like Snook and I have done a few scenes
where we kind of know the lines,
but the scene sort of changes and develops
because we just throw different things at each other. like you know i slapped her once and she put me
in a headlock like we just sort of came up with that right and that kind of stuff is fun because
we're just trying to like play with each other and so with jeremy sometimes it's a little less
like a sometimes it can be if it's appropriate for his character and sometimes he's like he's put himself
in a bubble and i have to work with that i just have to approach it from sort of a different angle
but you don't mind no the result is usually like good it just it's like you know i can't approach
it the way that i otherwise would sort of like but i adjusted to it and we figured out how to
work that way what about working with b Brian? Brian is a freaking dream.
He and Snook are the furthest from their characters.
Brian is about the most approachable man.
He's like a big, cuddly teddy bear.
Yeah, I interviewed him.
I love him.
He's a real sweetheart, yeah.
For this show?
Or was it a couple years ago?
No, no, it was not that long ago.
It was for when he was up for,
what was he, the last awards,
maybe the Globes, probably before the Globes.
Yeah.
So like within the last six months.
Yeah, no, he's really fantastic.
He's a guy that can sort of just like turn it on.
Matthew McFadden is this way too,
where, you know,
it can just be chit-chat, chit-chat, action,
and then they're just in that character
without any, seemingly any effort whatsoever.
Well, I think that like, you know,
it's that weird kind of British training.
Yes.
I mean, some of it.
I don't, I don't, well, Snook is from Australia,
but it seems like there's something about
certain people the way they,
well, it's like that dumb old story you hear
about Olivier and Hoffman on the set of Marathon Man.
You know, I mean, it just seems like some of the training that the English stage actors have, they can just, it's a job.
And it's like, I know the guy.
I can be the guy right now, you know.
guy right now you know well so so here's the thing when it comes to like you know so jeremy's process versus like say brian or matthew is um as long as we're getting the result who gives a shit right
right like yeah just sometimes i've heard of people that do make things very heavy and our
kind of method and then you watch the movie you go well what the hell what was all that work for
that's not that great like this is what would you make this up and
everybody on the show is so supportive of everybody else that like it's not like you know oh jeremy's
being a burden or whatever it's just he has a very specific process that sometimes requires a
little like adjustment which is fine because we want you want to help him out sure and it's like
you know you're all i mean actors in general are fucking weirdos and you
never know what the hell is going to happen and you know you're on a set and you're like what's
wrong with that guy it's like i don't know he's that guy and i'm like all right well well i guess
he'll go sit in his trailer and do whatever he's got to do then yeah and that's that nobody's
nobody's a shitty guy either i think it would be one thing if somebody was being you know method
and very demanding and then on top of that they were just a prick or something like it's not but i guess that
really happens i've never like i haven't been acting that long in any professional way so
you know my most of my life it's been stand-up but when i hear stories about certain people i'm
it's just so fucking amazing to me but you've been doing it 30 years so you probably had to
work with real fucking assholes i don't really think i have really not that's good i've gotten kind of lucky with that um
i've had like a couple of directors in theater that have i've sort of butted heads with right
but that's kind of it no but i just mean the kind of actors are like well he's not going to come out
of his trailer like you're somebody who makes an entire cast an entire set wait two hours because for no reason i don't i did i did a movie
as like a teenager and um meryl streep with meryl streep she was called to the set last and she was
like oh is everyone waiting for me and in a very polite way she turned to the ad and said could you
please make sure that never happens again i don't want anybody waiting for me call me when you call
everybody else and it was like really nice and i remember
i learned from that like okay cool because she's number one on the call she's the whole reason
this movie's happening and she does not want special treatment don't do that and i remember
c martin doing the same as a kid too i learned that as a kid like oh you can be the guy in charge
and be nice right right i just i don't know, I don't know the type of person that just knows
that they're making someone wait and it's not important that they do it, but they're going to
fucking do it anyways. Like, I don't know what that is. Why are people shitty sometimes? I don't
know. Like why, why are there shitty people? No, but I mean, I've, I've been shitty, but not in
that way. You know, it's sort of like, I want to get there and be shitty.
You know, I don't need people waiting for me to be shitty.
I think people just want to swing their fucking dick.
I don't know what it is.
That's probably right.
I need years of therapy to find out it's because they were bullied as a kid.
Now they're going to just bully everyone else and be a dick.
I don't know.
Well, yeah, I mean, well, that's, I mean, that's it.
I, I, I, I mean, as many people as I've been around and as a, you know, and I've been a bully and I've been bullied. else would be a dick i don't know well yeah i mean well that's i mean that's it i i i i mean as
many people as i've been around and as a you know and i've been a bully and i've been bullied i i
know both sides of that but there's still like given the the world we're living in in this
particular president and everything else and all the craven motherfuckers that you know want to be
loyal to him even though he can't be loyal to anybody there's still part of the human uh psyche
that i don't fucking get i don't
understand how these people fucking live with themselves but they've been written about your
show has a certain element of that it's shakespearean it's greek it's been around it's
been people since the beginning of people but i don't get it yeah i know and do you ever like try
have you ever like like been i've had a couple experiences where like i'll be at a bar
and a guy just says something that's either like really racist or something and i was like oh i'm
gonna pretend that that's not really offensive and i'm just gonna sort of talk to this person
to try to understand them um i've had that a couple of times and it's interesting because
it gives me a better understanding of where they come from but then i still think but you're
you're still just a shitty person there's like a certain
i think my godfather said something too like you know he goes he says i just can't listen to
anybody who complains about their childhood after the age of 30 right like like at this point figure
it out um so there's people like you know i had a conversation with a guy in a bar years ago but he
was like 25 26 and he didn't believe in gay marriage.
And I just talked to him about it, and I wanted to hear his point.
His point didn't make any sense.
So instead of being like, you're an idiot and your point doesn't make any sense, I – this is actually kind of one of those things.
I don't want it to come off as like bragging, but I changed his mind in the conversation because his logic just sort of didn't make sense,
but he thought he was coming from a good place. He was like, no, no, it's okay. He was saying,
I think if gay people get married, this is literally what he said. He goes, I think if
gay people start getting married, it sort of promotes it. And then people that might not
have come out of the closet, uh, who are now going to come out of the closet. And that means
there's going to be more gay people. And I said, okay, now can I ask you what's wrong with that?
And he said, well, I think as Americans,
it's our job to create more Americans.
Other countries are procreating
and we're just not making as many babies.
And if there's a lot of more gay people
that they're getting married,
they're just not making babies.
And I'm like, okay, that's interesting.
So your issue is that you want more Americans to be made.
And he said, yeah. And I said, so my wife and your issue is that you want more Americans to be made. And he said, yeah.
And I said, so my wife and I have decided that we don't want to have kids.
And he went, uh-huh.
And I said, so do you have an issue with straight people not having kids?
And he was like, no.
And I just sort of looked at him like this.
And he went, no, that's interesting.
That's a, yeah, you know what?
That's really a good point.
I hadn't thought about that.
Yeah.
I mean, yeah, why shouldn't they get married?
I guess that's sort of, hey, man, this was a really good talk. Yeah, you too. And I walked away going, was it
really that simple? He just needs to talk to one person about his logic. Like that's it.
I think that sometimes that is it depending on, you know, like if it's based on them,
if it's based on an intellectual fault, like, you know, some people have real feelings that
were wired into them that are very hard to, to, to shake. But when it's just sort of like he's he had this idea, clearly he was
mildly uncomfortable with gay people. But that was the only thing driving the thought behind it.
It wasn't like I hate them or whatever. It's just like I'm a little uncomfortable about it. It
doesn't make sense to me. And this is the reason I put together for why. And, you know, it was
hinging on faulty. People want to be good. Like so they think like put together for why. And, you know, it was hinging on faulty.
People want to be good.
Like, so they think like they're approaching it.
And, um, but a lot of people aren't heard.
I think there's, there's a lot of like, well, you're an idiot.
And, you know, and that's, I think a lot of people are very defensive about their position.
A lot of people are, are shallow, stupid people and severely undereducated.
Even when basic shit, I was talking to my producer about this
like i was talking to a woman i granted she was you know a personal trainer i'm not expecting her
to be a genius but you know i'm an actor you're a comedian what's expected of us exactly but it
was just an idea that like you know well these rules keep changing around covid like there doesn't
seem to be sort of any you know they don't seem to like they say you can do one thing one day and then the next week it's different.
And she's criticizing it as if it means that they're waffling on policy, whereas it's sort of like, no, that's how science works.
They don't know what the fuck it is.
So, you know, we got to wait until they figure it out.
I mean, it's better to err on the side of caution.
But who would think that?
Like, I'm not going to believe Fauci because he goes back on his word.
He's like, it's not going back on his word.
They don't know what the fuck we're dealing with.
Oh, my God.
The fact that it's become at all political.
It's just like, put the fucking mask on.
Wash your hands.
That's the thing I can't understand.
Like, when it comes down, like what I'm saying to you,
it's like there's certain elements of people,
the stubbornness and the shallowness of deciding that the mask is some sort of indication of American freedom is like to me, it's like, what's what?
What the fuck went wrong with this many people?
I know.
Yeah, we're all sorts of fucked.
That's that's that's kind of the general.
I don't know what the hell is going to happen.
Where are you going to move to? Oh to oh yeah we're apparently staying in manhattan i don't mean to bum me out i i heard that uh brian wants to do uh amadeus with you is that true
have you heard he did he did tell me that yeah i haven't actually looked at it he told me
he was going to send me a copy a copy fucking pricks he's thinking speaking
of pricks and shitty people um no wait actually i was gonna say something about people being shitty
on set there was like because i grew up watching people be really great um i did a movie when i
was like 15 with kevin pollack and i saw him recently and he said something like i'm really
glad to see that you're still working 20 years later he goes you know the secret is he goes um like if you're good you're good whatever there's
tons of actors that are really good that'll get the part he goes but just be nice and be easy to
work with and you'll actually stick around he goes that's the only reason i'm still here
so he said be good to work with and be a nice guy. That's very nice of Kevin.
Because there are sometimes stories of people like,
they'll be like, what happened to that actor?
They're so good.
And then later you find out they were fucking nuts on set.
I'm like, oh, well, that's why.
Yeah, well, unless they're nuts and make a lot of people a lot of money.
It seems there's a certain license that's given to those people for at least a while.
It's like if you're an actor that's making a lot of people millions of dollars, they're like, hey, I don't care if he kills people in his trailer. We don't know if that's true.
That's a good point. Yeah. But if you're just a character actor who's a pain in the ass,
you're like, yeah, put him out to pasture on television and see if it works out.
Just don't pull it off too soon. Wait until you're making hundreds of million dollars
at the box office and you can start being a prick. That's the lesson.
That's the lesson.
That's usually what happens,
because it's like the last hobby.
It seems like the final hobby of the wealthy
is sort of like,
how can I really make people fucking hate me?
There's part of me that thinks, well, they've earned it.
That's true, that's true.
Well, I mean, you come off as kind of like,
you seem like you're capable of being a dick.
Sure, to people that deserve it i guess yeah um so if you said like i've been the bully and i've been bullied i'm like i've been the bully
i don't know if i've been bullied shit never mind no no i feel like people tried and i'm i just
always had like the smart mouth of like and i hide behind the fact that I'm so little that I'll pick a fight with a
big guy at a bar because they're not going to hit me.
If they punch me,
I'm going to explode.
Like your smelly,
your smelly dad wasn't a bully.
Oh,
that's a good point.
Um,
not really with me or with us.
I mean,
some siblings,
I can't really speak for the siblings.
Yeah.
It's great.
Like having seven,
seven of us,
like all grew up with that sort of
Wolfpack mentality I told you about,
but all have very different experiences.
It's kind of interesting.
Have you guys seen any...
I know no one's shooting shit,
but have you seen any scripts for the next season?
Nope, not at all.
I'm one of those who just doesn't want to know anymore.
I think I was very frustrated at the start of this process of like coming from theater and doing all these films where I want to know my character, like story arc and not being able to have that.
Because first of all, it's TV. And second of all, there's just so many rewrites that come in sometimes in the middle of the night.
I know, it's crazy.
It's nuts. But I just go with it now. and now that's my preferred way of working so you're
like so the night before you're sort of like can i get the pages in the morning how many
you know is that honestly look like i'll see on the call sheet that it says okay we're doing that
scene i'm like i kind of remember that from the table read i'll look at it in the morning but you
guys do you do do a table read yeah like weeks before but they make a lot of changes and they do
sometimes i remember in the first season um there was a rewrite that came in at like three in the morning and brian had a lot of dialogue it was like a big speech and we did
the first rehearsal and brian just started doing the old version and one of the writers came up to
him and said did you get the draft and he goes when did it come in and he goes uh we sent it
around three in the morning he goes if it's after 10 30 i'm not doing it and the writers went fair
enough so they don't give brian rewrites after like 1030 or whatever it is at night.
Because he has a process that he's been working on for 60 something years where he works on it all night and prepares and then goes to sleep and shows up at work.
And then I'm like, now it's different.
He goes, no.
I'm so mad that we're in this fucking plague.
I'd like to see it.
When are we going to get to see another one?
You guys are all, you're going to be 50 by the time you that's i know they're going to have to like write in
a missing gap of a couple of years because i've certainly aged in the last year with this like
no sleep baby situation well what uh what is the plan is there a plan there's i think the plan is
loose like there's nothing concrete i think that's one thing they asked us not to talk about right
fuck it say like it's sort of like the loose plan is to start shooting late october but
who the fuck knows that seems to be a lot of i'm hearing a lot of the late october business with
the like with my show they're like we're not going to do anything until 2021 because everyone's got
to touch each other in our show so they got to have whatever they're going to have you know
devised or the safety has got to be pretty tight to do a wrestling show, you know.
Because there's also going to be, I'm guessing on your show,
there's like wrestling, like coordinators, like trainers, anything like that.
Of course, yeah.
Yeah, Chavo's there every day.
Chavo works on your show.
Yeah.
Oh, that's fantastic.
He's doing the, he's the coach, man.
He's teaching them how to wrestle.
There's Chavo and two stunt coordinators, but it's all Chavo.
Chavo, that's, you're in good hands with that guy.
That guy really knows what he's doing.
That's really cool.
Yeah.
But so everybody kind of has to like self quarantine together.
And then there's things of like, cause that's what I heard.
There's like, there was like, okay,
we'll just put all the actors and like the whole crew into one hotel and you
quarantine together and you can't interact with anybody.
I'm like, but what about my family?
Can they come?
And then there's the daily tests and things.
There's teams of people working on that.
And I'm sort of trusting that we have some people in our cast
that are in a high risk.
So we have to be extra safe.
I think it's going to come
down to those daily tests i mean that's what's got to go that's what's got to happen and the
thing is one motherfucker goes out and decides like i'm just going to go get a drink at this
bar one night and comes back and test positive you shut down the whole production exactly it's
and can you trust fucking actors i mean come on
no no but it seems like most
of the people that you're working with are not
they're not kids.
Most of them are, you know,
responsible people.
They're not, you know.
Yeah, yeah. Married people.
But, you know, who knows who's going to go out and
someone's going to do something in their hotel room
they shouldn't. Well, I mean, that's just
life, isn't it? It is.
Hotels aren't the real world no that's what happens in those rooms horrible horrible and then i feel like so
vanilla when i like go away for work and then i like unpack my bag and i fold my shirts and put
it away in this like cum covered dresser that's in the I bring my own tea kettle
I have a collapsible
tea water boiler
because I had heard that
when you ask for one from the hotel
there's an outside chance that
someone boiled their fucking underwear
in there to clean them
how did you hear that? I don't know but it makes
sense. It's like that scene in Planes, Trains, and Automobiles
where he uses the sink to wash his
junk and he washes his filthy underwear.
I think about that any time I'm in
a not-so-nice hotel and I look at the sink
and I'm like, I'm not...
Oh, yeah, man. Or just bedspreads.
I know they're
washing the sheets, but
what about that fucking bedspread?
I know. Oh, the bed... but what about that fucking bedspread? I know.
Oh, the bed.
Yeah.
That's the first thing that I do.
I get rid of those, the pillows, the decorative pillows, anything that can't be washed.
Yeah.
And that's in the corner.
Yeah.
And then I jerk off on it.
Yeah.
Just for good.
Just to put my.
Well, clearly that's what everyone does.
I mean, I think that's why we, we know better.
Is that.
Yeah.
Fool me once sheets.
I'm going to show you once sheets i'm gonna show you
i'm gonna show you what it really looks like it's a very weird thing uh that if you like i don't
know that everybody uh appreciates what we're talking about but i i did i wrote a piece in a
in a book i wrote about jerking off right on the floor of a hotel room i mean there's there's just
some people we're fucking animals i guess but when i get into a hotel room i'm not you know i i'm gonna you know i'm gonna come i'm gonna come on
the floor yeah it's like you know sometimes you get the really nice one where he's like oh there's
an ensuite well okay i'm gonna have to jerk off on the couch and then work on this chair
how many days am i here like it's just sort of yeah you got it it's it it. It's, it's. What you do. Yeah, it's what you do.
It's like, okay, I've got to shower.
I've got to order dinner first, jerk off on something.
And then, yeah, okay, then I'll get the steak, I guess.
The peppercorn sauce.
That looks nice.
Okay, well, at least we know how to have fun in a hotel.
What else is there to do?
I know.
Work on my lines?
Am I, am I supposed to like sit in a hotel room and work?
No.
I was on a movie and I, I actually had, uh, for the first time I to like sit in a hotel room and work no i was on a movie and i i actually
had uh for the first time i had like a a top-notch trailer and i was like wow even these are kind of
gross yeah even the good trailers not great yeah so you where'd you jerk off on that one i'm trying
to remember if i even like it well that's tricky because sometimes it rocks the trailer and then
like when they find out later
that you were in there by yourself it's a little embarrassing yeah like this rocking but you can
knock because i'm just in here by myself i don't know how people get away with like you hear about
on sets like trailer business like you know because most of the time if you're not at top
of the call sheet you know you're you're in a three there's like two or three people in the
fucking trailer what are you gonna do i don't actually like two or three people in the fucking trailer. What are you going to do?
I don't actually like having,
I haven't had a big trailer since I was like a kid,
basically.
And I don't like it.
I like the little thing.
I like,
cause if I'm in there,
I want to get the fuck out of there and be on set.
Yeah.
I can't,
I never hang out in the trailer.
I just changed my clothes in there.
I got to get out because it's like,
it seems like they make it so you can't,
they make it,
I think because they know
that actors are going to jerk off on things there's never like there's never a comfortable
like the with the beds or the couch are always sort of vinyl-y or shitty you know fake leather
and you don't want to lay on them and yeah that's because it seems to come off of it that's why
that's right i'm saying they make them as uncomfortable as possible because they're just
actors are monsters they're animals oh so what's the rest of the day now what are you gonna
play with the kid i would like to i got some other like i try to like do anytime there's stuff i like
pile it into one day right so that i like it minus a day most of the day with my baby so that I can play with her for the rest of the week.
So you got more press?
This one was sort of the big one and the fun one, the one I was looking forward to.
I did a radio show yesterday and I think by the
third time I said, fuck, they
winced and I'm like, oh, are you bleeping me?
I'm sorry. This is like, I don't know how to
not. Here I am talking about jerking
off on certain surfaces that are very
cleanable and this is more my speed.
Well, yeah, then you got the poor guy who's got his finger on the button and they've only got
the weird thing about those delays is every time you do it it eats up the the time like there's
only a certain amount of time you can delay in a in a chunk in in like a segment right so by the
third fuck they're like we're not going to be able to save it. It was great talking to you, man.
Yeah, you too.
Fuck.
I'd like to do this again.
I don't know if you have repeat guests.
We'll have a few years when I have a bigger trailer and I have more stories about.
No, we'll just hang out, man.
When we get through the plague, maybe we can just have lunch or something.
That sounds like a fucking thing.
Let's do that thing.
Okay, buddy.
I'll do it. See ya.
I like that guy, huh?
Solid. He's exactly like you think he would be.
Kieran is nominated for an Emmy for the
Best Supporting Actor in a Drama Series. You can watch
both seasons of Succession
on HBO On Demand
and HBO Max.
Now I got the wah-wah pedal out.
Let's lay into it. Thank you. © BF-WATCH TV 2021 boomer lives Boomer lives
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