Yannis Pappas Hour - It’s Fantasy

Episode Date: October 16, 2021

Yanni destroys the comedy GOAT argument, explores the supply chain problem, Demi Lovato is concerned for aliens because she’s coco puffs, legos are on notice, and Yanni explains how extended youth h...as created the fantasy land child play that adults engage in now. All thanks, to you guessed it, the amenities of modernity. Finally, Yanni explains how RBG & Trump were the same and the Yale “Trap House” story which is a douse. Wasdadealis!For bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/yannilongdaysSponsors Box Of Awesome https://www.bespokepost.com/start?b=&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=brand-BOA&utm_content=bespoke-post-test1&utm_term=%23boxofawesome&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIrrXal67Q8wIVvwaICR1ugwMBEAAYASAAEgKDS_D_BwEPromo code: FUMESTalk Space https://www.talkspace.comPromo code: FUMESManscaped https://www.manscaped.com/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIpdH38K7Q8wIVl-SzCh3vTwp_EAAYAiAAEgIjb_D_BwEPromo code: FUMES The show goes out every Saturday night to youtube and podcast audio platforms but while it's being recorded the show goes LIVE on Yannis' Instagram!Come join in on the LONG DAY & Follow Yannis PappasInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappasWebsite - https://www.yannispappascomedy.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Good day everyone and by everyone I mean however you identify and whatever time you are listening to this. It could be yesterday, it could be tomorrow. I don't want to discriminate against yesterday, tomorrow or the next day. So anytime you're listening to this is just as good. All times are equal. All days are equal. This has been an amazing week
Starting point is 00:00:27 for very important issues in America. We got inflation concerns. Delta's still killing people. We have an impending civil war. There's bounty on people's heads who want abortions in Texas. But we got to the important stuff. A, Demi Lovato has spoken up on people's heads who want abortions in Texas. But we got to the important stuff.
Starting point is 00:00:51 A, Demi Lovato has spoken up and has had enough of aliens being called aliens. Yale Law School and their diversity czar have come down on a Native American student who referred to, I guess, his frat house or his federal society's house meeting as a trap house. And he said, we're going to have good American fare like fried chicken and apple pie. So that's a big problem. Also, Seattle school has canceled the Halloween parade because marginalized students, I guess there's some ghosts that go to that school who are very offended. They're remaking Home Alone and it's just with a fat British kid. They're out of ideas.
Starting point is 00:01:29 There's also an impending strike that could happen in Hollywood that could shut down all of the movie business. But you know what? As long as this Yale-schooled Native American child is disciplined at Yale by the diversity star, I don't think we have any problems. People are going, oh my God, is inflation going to be crazy? Oh my God, is the supply chain from China all fucked up, et cetera? Am I going to be able to get my kid a laptop on Christmas on time?
Starting point is 00:02:02 Who cares? Because guess what? I got some good news. Superman's son is bisexual. Very important for you to know what the superheroes are doing when they're not out there wearing tights. Which, I don't know, I thought they were all already gay. But I'm actually surprised to find out Superman's son was half straight, to be honest with you. But he's gay.
Starting point is 00:02:25 Also, Legos. Legos have decided after polling youngsters, which, you know, nobody knows life better than youngsters. And young consumer tastes drive this country right now. Legos has decided to go gender neutral. I don't know if you could pick more of an inanimate object that doesn't have a gender than Legos, but they're going gender neutral and King John Unes lost a lot of weight. So there is hope in the world. This is long days and I don't know what the fucking deal is. We'll see you next time. Get his kids screwed in Got a lot to say Aw shit It's about to be a long day It's a long day
Starting point is 00:03:26 It's a long day What's up everybody? We got all of our favorites in the live chat As you know, comment roulette I look down every episode and read comments We got our favorite Jared Harvin Jay Harvin 15 in the chat We got Drew Films in the chat
Starting point is 00:03:43 And we got Rob Smith of Playground You can't say in the chat and we got Rob's Metal Playground. You can't say it normally. You just gotta go Rob's Metal Playground is in the chat. Patreon.com slash Yanni Long Days for bonus episodes every week. Also merch on my website. YannisPappasComedy.com
Starting point is 00:04:00 Also join the YouTube clips page guys. Yanni Longday's clips. Also, I will be in Timonian, Maryland, which I guess is white Baltimore. You know, it's outside of Baltimore somewhere. So get your tickets for that. Jay Harvin will be with me.
Starting point is 00:04:20 He's opening up. So get your tickets. That's in November 4th or 5th. I can't go to yannispapascomedy.com, also I'll be in Phoenix, I'll be in Uncle Vinny's, my Florida, Tampa dates just got rescheduled for February, so a lot of the people bought tickets, those should be good, but get your tickets for Tampa, new dates also unraveling as Yanni is going full stand-up mode again. Watch out because Yanni's leveling up.
Starting point is 00:04:48 They're going to be calling me the GOAT soon. Can we stop with this GOAT shit? Chappelle's the GOAT. He says he's the GOAT. He said in his specialty joke he's the GOAT. It's comedy, guys. Okay? It's not basketball.
Starting point is 00:05:04 There's not a score at the end. It's an art form. It's this American disease that we have that the Europeans make fun of. And I don't even, I just, I can't even believe Europe is free. I just found out because I heard, I heard Joe Rogan's speech about how America is the only free country ever to exist. And then I was told that Europe also has freedom. So does Australia. So did Taiwan. They used to have freedom. It's this thing we have in America where we got to rank everything. We got to put everything in a rank.
Starting point is 00:05:36 Even those lists we used to make at number one. It's a fucking art. That's like saying who's the best artist and people go Dolly's the goat, Dolly's the goat. Even in rap, it's like who's the goat? It's like who who's the best artist. People go, Dolly's the GOAT. Dolly's the GOAT. Even in rap, it's like, who's the GOAT? It's like, who do you like, guy? Okay? There's a GOAT in basketball because there's a score and you can count how many championships you win because they're playing a zero-sum game. Okay? You know what a zero-sum game is? Fucking get smarter. Fucking get smarter.
Starting point is 00:06:04 Comedy's not a zero-sum game. It's not Dave Chappelle versus Pete Holmes. Although Dave Chappelle would crush him. Obviously, we kind of know the score because of the audience and also the level of difficulty. Comedians know how great
Starting point is 00:06:17 Dave Chappelle is because of the level of difficulty. We know the tricks. We know who the hacks are. We know who aren't the hacks. But that doesn't mean that hacks aren't hilarious because they are we know who aren't the hacks but that doesn't mean that hacks aren't hilarious because they are
Starting point is 00:06:28 that's what makes them hacks and it also doesn't mean that that's the objective goat that they're God's favorite comedian because God's favorite comedian
Starting point is 00:06:36 is Nanette he likes a woman who fucking can fucking be a boss bitch God and Jesus love SNL they may be the only two people who fucking can fucking be a boss bitch.
Starting point is 00:06:47 God and Jesus love SNL. They may be the only two people still watching it. Their premiere episode really tanked, so they had to bring in the comedy heavy guns, Kim Kardashian, or one of the Kardashians. I don't fucking know who Demi Lovato is. I don't know. I wish there was more sane people on this planet who didn't know who Demi Lovato is
Starting point is 00:07:07 and I wish there was a lot of people who didn't know which Kardashian was which because I don't know. They're all Caitlyn and me because I'm paying attention to my family and my friends and sports. Something that's real. Maybe the only real thing left.
Starting point is 00:07:23 Sports. And who knows how real that's going to be because now betting owns everything. So now fucking guys are going to be betting through proxies and throwing games. The Black Sox are back. Most people don't even know the scandal of the Black Sox or CCNY, but especially the Black Sox
Starting point is 00:07:40 because nobody likes baseball anymore. Baseball, you better do something. There needs to be a blind guy with a gun on the sidelines just shooting at players, or there's got to be a way that you have to force guys to run. We can no longer have out-of-shape dudes just sitting up there with a stick,
Starting point is 00:07:55 and it takes 15 minutes for them to get off the field, okay? It's boring, okay? Kids are watching six-second TikTok videos, and you expect me to sit down for a four-hour game? Change with the times. We need a shot clock, okay? The team that loses needs to be sent to a Chinese factory
Starting point is 00:08:17 to replace some of these workers who are being quarantined with COVID because it's fucking up our supply chain. And if there's one thing America needs, it's Christmas, goddammit. So don't let these goddamned Chinese steal Christmas. Hollywood's out of ideas. They're redoing, they are redoing Home Alone with a fat British kid.
Starting point is 00:08:44 It's the same exact movie they're out of ideas so here's an idea for you let's remake the grinch except the grinch is chinese factory owners who are shutting down and stopping toy car and laptop and furniture production because they're trying to contain COVID. Fuck you. Okay? You work through worse conditions. Your government doesn't even allow you to get a lunch break. You have a tube inserted in your asshole that injects sushi into your body to keep you making
Starting point is 00:09:17 iPhones and something as small as a manipulated pantheon made in a laboratory by some fucking unscrupulous scientist who leaked it. That's my theory. It's going to stop you from making our toys. Bullshit. That FAO Schwartz better be fucking packed, baby. If I can't get my daughter a goddamn Cocomelon doll, then I'm going to go around and I I am gonna spray paint on Chinese restaurants. Damn, now I've been
Starting point is 00:09:47 demonetized for hate speech. I'm joking, I'm a comedian. Can you put that on my channel, please? Stop demonetizing my shit. I've already proved that it was a joke Instagram about the Catholic Church. He demonetized my Instagram
Starting point is 00:10:03 for saying that the Catholic Church was set up to rape children. And then three weeks later, you guys raped a lot of children. But God forbid an unstable comedian launches a tirade from his former
Starting point is 00:10:22 apartment, which you can't believe he lived in because it's so small, in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. Shout out to the couple of people who recognize me today in Bay Ridge. Don't talk to me, okay? I'm trying to eat a fucking no-no slice on the top of my car. I don't want to talk to you, all right? I had a good goddamn vodka slice and a nice no nose grandma
Starting point is 00:10:45 and a zucchini leave me alone Gary Foss says he's listening on full blast in a pizzeria that's the way you do long days
Starting point is 00:10:55 baby that's the way you do y'all long days Luma Limon says Pete Holmes being the bad guy in the new
Starting point is 00:11:02 Home Alone is actually worse than the new Bi Superman see everyone's got an opinion some people, Pete Holmes being the bad guy in the new Home Alone is actually worse than the new Bi-Superman. See, everyone's got an opinion. Some people think Pete Holmes is the GOAT, the greatest comedian of all time. jharvin15, Instagram is taking money away from Giannis to balance out all the money that Greek contractors stole from new homeowners.
Starting point is 00:11:22 Ding, ding, ding. See, I like jharvin because the kid's smart he's wise and he's also like he knows shit exactly right if you uh so what happened is we started the project and then now we see we'll have a situation here we uh we didn't know that you have termites. I have termites? This is a steel frame building. Yeah, what happened is there's a new type of termite that the Turks invented. The Turks started like the Chinese invented this coronavirus with the gain of function in the laboratory. Oh, you're not reading George Bush's family diary. Yeah, well also the Turkish made the new termites that's chewing steel Like the jet fuel melting the steel in the World Trade Center
Starting point is 00:12:13 They said jet fuel don't melt steel, but the Chinese-Turkish German fire that they created melting the steel with the Jews With the Jews' fire. From hell. Because the Jews killed Jesus. So we see the termites. So now in order to finish the contract, you're going to have to give me my money.
Starting point is 00:12:39 Leave my money here. Going to cost you... What do you want to pay? How much do you have? Very nice. Let's talk money here. How much you give me for material? Cash.
Starting point is 00:12:55 You have cash? I like cash. Listen, you give me the cash. I have cash here on Zidane. He will give you free cheeseburger. Greeks know how to party. Yeah, Greek contractors, they're like Greek cab drivers. When you get into a Greek cab in Greece, first they ask you where you're from, okay?
Starting point is 00:13:22 And if you're Greek, they give you a break and they'll only rip you off about five ten percent if you say hi i'm from sweden they go oh look sweden have a brother there he has a restaurant where are you going athens oh we got we have to go through uh is, then we take you over a boat to Italy, yeah, it's traffic. Going to be 15,000 euros. What's the problem? We have EU Germans for it. Blame the Germans. I have no idea who Tammy Lovato is.
Starting point is 00:13:59 Okay, I just called her Tammy Lovato. But Tammy Lovato is taking a stand, as you know, because, you know, journalists, it's headlines everywhere. I think even Neil deGrasse Tyson reached out to respond to her. Because, you know, if there's a comment that warrants a response from one of our most famous homegrown astrophysicists, who I take a lot of pride in because he's from the Bronx, astrophysicists who I take a lot of pride in because he's from the Bronx. He's a cute kid who used to wrestle and he's like Jay Harvin 15. He's half black and half Puerto Rican. Did you know that? Okay. He's a New York's own astrophysicist found time in his fucking day
Starting point is 00:14:39 to respond to Demi Lovato. Neil deGrasse Tyson states, Demi Lovato's space aliens have no feelings, so don't worry about offending them. Okay, so at least the guy made a joke. At least the guy made a joke. But here's the thing, Neil. I need you your egghead in a fucking lab trying to find those
Starting point is 00:15:00 aliens or trying to figure out how to shoot asteroids off of their fucking what is it called? Their course, their trajectory, whatever it's called, whatever the eggheads call it. There's a name for it. We don't need you on Twitter. Can Neil deGrasse Twiter, Neil deGrasse Twiter, can you get off Twitter?
Starting point is 00:15:18 You're a hero to New Yorkers. You're a hero to your community, son. Okay? You're a fucking astrophysicist egghead i don't need you responding to some mentally ill chick who i have no idea who she is who the fuck is demi lovato is she is she one of the wilson sisters was she was she in the dixie chicks i don't know who she is dog all i know is i saw a picture of her i thought she was rain wilson and he's a male actor because i thought he was one of the Dixie Chicks? I don't know who she is, dog. All I know is I saw a picture of her and I thought she was Rainn Wilson.
Starting point is 00:15:46 And he's a male actor because I thought he was one of the Dixie Chicks. There's too many people to memorize. I want to go back to days when it was George Clooney and Will Smith. And that's it. And Matt Damon. And everyone who thought of the two,
Starting point is 00:16:03 everyone thought it was going to be Ben Affleck who was going to be the big movie star. But Ben Affleck got distracted by too much puss, puss. He did Gigli with J-Lo. Was J-Lo and Gigli? Yeah. You do a movie with J-Lo, bubba.
Starting point is 00:16:22 While fucking Matt Damon was doing the Bourne, the identity joints. He was doing real movies. Ben Affleck was dancing around in a leather coat on Staten Island filming with J-Lo. Mesmerized by that sweet Too many celebrities. Demi Lovato,
Starting point is 00:16:41 as you know, especially when you're watching this, I don't want to discriminate on the day you're watching, whatever it is. She has stated that aliens is a derogatory, is a pejorative, is a derogatory name for aliens. JayHarvard15 says, Aliots. JayHarvard15 says,
Starting point is 00:17:05 Aflac was going to be a movie star until he discovered what Saison is. Mark Palmieri wants to know, I wonder how Corey from That's So Raven is doing. Me too. Me too. I'm surprised That's So Raven didn't win more Emmys what happened to the WB Demi Lovato
Starting point is 00:17:29 okay her haircut looks like my accountant's I mean she looks like I mean she looks like she just cut her own hair while she's going mama's pretty mama's pretty it looks like she cut her hair with a knife.
Starting point is 00:17:46 Look at those bangs. Okay, so Demi Lovato's lost her fucking mind. Okay, I got a friend for you. Her name is Britney Spears. I want to see a new reality show the way Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie did it, except it's Demi Lovato and Britney Spears, and they are trying to start a company together.
Starting point is 00:18:05 And just roll cameras. Don't even give them anything. Just call it Demi and Britney, and that's what it's called, and just let them go. Let it happen. She'll be fucking stabbing windows with umbrellas. Demi Lovato will be saying,
Starting point is 00:18:21 don't throw darts at the dartboard because the dartboard has feelings. How would you like it if someone was throwing dartboards at you? And you're like, you're right, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking of the dartboard's feelings, Demi Lovato. So what happened? It's derogatory towards extra. Can we just watch what she says?
Starting point is 00:18:38 Is it in this video? Because I've never heard it. Bill Brewer Baggins 415 has a great suggestion he says take Demi Lovato and Britney Spears and put them on the deadliest catch Jeff Bezos can you take Demi Lovato
Starting point is 00:18:59 and Britney Spears to space and let them out say this is your stop. And she'll go, I'm going to be with the extraterrestrial. And she loses oxygen. Let's see what Demi, J-Harm 15,
Starting point is 00:19:17 throw Demi and Britney into a room with each other and whoever shaves their head first loses. Yas. Yas. Yas. Let's hear it. I think very personal with you. Over the past year and a half,
Starting point is 00:19:33 I've been doing some healing and self-reflective work. And through this work, I've had the revelation that I identify as non-binary. With that said, I'll officially be changing my pronouns to they, them. I feel that this best represents the fluidity I feel in my gender expression and allows me to feel most authentic and true. Well, it's good to set it up.
Starting point is 00:19:51 It's good to set up that calling the aliens a derogatory term for the aliens didn't come out of left field. Okay? It wasn't the first wild thing she came out as. First, she wants you to know that she is no longer she she's they she's non-binary she is all the genders don't be distracted by the titties and puss puss that's just you know that's just there. But, you know, don't be distracted. Okay, like a sociopath,
Starting point is 00:20:29 you never want to be distracted by his actions. Just pay attention to his charismatic words. Don't pay attention, okay? While he's fucking robbing you blind and ruining your life, you just go, damn, the kid has decent dick. Talking to the gullible ladies out there who love themselves a goddamn lying sociopath. Okay, so Demi Lovato used to be hot
Starting point is 00:20:54 and now she looks like she ate Shania Twain. I guess it was a print article in an interview. Oh, so we don't get to hear her beautiful voice going I'm Demi Lovato I identify as they them also we need to stop this discrimination against this extraterrestrial life form we don't
Starting point is 00:21:16 even know exists as a fact please don't refer to them as aliens it hurts their feelings they came to me I was kidnapped by aliens yesterday from my LA condo they took me into their spaceship and they told me the reason that they haven't landed is because we're mean and they don't like the term aliens so as a representative of the extraterrestrials i would like to say as demi lovato if we can start calling them extraterrestrials they will land and teach us how to live in coachella peace
Starting point is 00:21:46 they want to make the world coachella respect aliens feelings i get where she's coming from you're hurting their feeling neil degrasse tyson i mean what's going on with black people these days? Now, Neil deGrasse Tyson and Chappelle are both being bummer of boomers. You guys really don't have any respect for marginalized communities like aliens and trans people. Trans people have been enslaved for thousands of years inside the body of an opposite gender. You think chattel slavery was hard, Dave Chappelle?
Starting point is 00:22:30 Try being a woman inside a man's body before science. You had to put on a wig and blow guys' legs in the house with a deep voice. It was tragic. What do you know about oppression, Dave Chappelle? What do you know about oppression? Dave Chappelle? What do you know about oppression? What do your people know about oppression? Do you know how hard it was to want to suck all those dicks and I couldn't? Do you know how fucking horrible it is to lap up a mud puddle, a puss-a-puss,
Starting point is 00:23:01 when all you want is a nice hot rod and an Italian sausage? That's oppression dave chappelle i love how uh i love trans people i think they're great i just think um they have been discriminated against obviously but obviously nowhere near as bad as black people. But also, trans people are kind of new. I think the first sex change operation was like 1959 or 60. And that didn't take long. In only 60 years, you guys won woman of the year. So, not bad. There's been a lot of progress.
Starting point is 00:23:42 And also, you just can't talk about them, which is pretty good. That means you guys have some power that you can just get guys canceled. But yeah, people shouldn't hate trans people. People should call them whatever pronouns they want. If those pronouns are singular. See, this is where you guys go too far. Humans always go too far. The hippies became the yippies.
Starting point is 00:24:05 You know, it just keeps going. Civil rights turns violent. I mean, people just don't know when to put down the sword and pick out the plow. You won woman of the year. You won. It's over. Okay? It's already been proven by stats that straight guys are jerking off to you online secretly.
Starting point is 00:24:25 You won. People love trans people. And then there was the other one from Orange of the New Black. What's her name? Courtney Cox. She's a big star. Nobody cares. Most people, almost nobody star. Nobody cares. Most people, almost nobody cares.
Starting point is 00:24:47 Nobody cares. When they start going, okay, pump the brakes, that's when you start going, I am multiple people. When you start going, call me they, you're going like, I won't do that because I took English class and I just can't. There's only one of yous. So can I just call you she?
Starting point is 00:25:04 Is she good enough? No, it's not good enough. And I just can't. There's only one of yous. So can I just call you she? Is she good enough? No, it's not good enough. Are Legos the most gender neutral toy good enough? No, it's not good enough. We need to make a press release that now Legos, how the fuck do you even make Legos gender neutral? Is there more of a gender neutral toy than a square plastic toy
Starting point is 00:25:31 that you can build into whatever you want? You can take the Legos and build a fabulous gay parade if you want it. If you had enough Legos, you can build them into a woman. You can build them into a man who's now living as a woman. You can build them into someone who's a man and woman. You can do whatever you want because guess what?
Starting point is 00:25:52 It's fantasy. That's fantasy. I think this is all tied to extended youth, to be honest with you, which is a theme that I've been talking about since my half hour on Comedy Central. We're living in a period of extended youth coddled by the amenities of modernity. So people are growing up later. Nobody's having kids.
Starting point is 00:26:10 They don't have adult responsibilities or real problems. So they just want to continue to play. And what do kids like to do? They love to play fantasy. I'll be a girl, you'll be a boy. Couple seven-year-olds, gender rolling. Now we're space aliens. Now I'm rescuing your planet from some dark force.
Starting point is 00:26:32 Now we're G.I. Joes. Now we're wrestlers. Use your imagination. So since everyone is still, is effectually now a child experiencing arrested development, you can see the consequences of what they believe spilling over into the real world.
Starting point is 00:26:52 We have just a bunch of children running around going, it's playtime. I want you to call me they, okay? And we're saving the world from the wretched stereotypes of calling extraterrestrials aliens and you're like that's fun that's a fun game let's play demi let's use my imagination legos are a tool of the patriarchy that have been holding women in place and forcing these tropes and stereotypes on women to do certain things. Let's gender neutralize Legos. Yeah, I want to play that game.
Starting point is 00:27:37 Does Demi Lovato have a family and kids? Can you look that up? Because I'm going to take a guess she doesn't. Because when you have kids, your main concern is like feeding the kids and if your child has any single male teachers. Because those are the only people I discriminate against. Listen, the only people I want around my baby daughter are women and gay guys.
Starting point is 00:28:04 Okay? I don't want any straight men. It's crazy that people hate gay guys. You know, gay guy, you know, one thing gay guys don't do if they're not priests, shit, the priests, but they're not gay. They're pedophiles. There's a difference and you should know that. Um, they don't abuse kids. they don't abuse kids that's always creepy single guys glasses they always got glasses
Starting point is 00:28:30 pedophiles can never see well okay so Demi Lovato does she have a family no Demi Lovato addressed the idea of having kids as coming out as non-binary yeah
Starting point is 00:28:43 as I suspected. Jay Harbin, 15. Gender fluid or not, when my father steps on a Lego, he's still going to call my mother a whore. You get angry. When you step on a Lego, you do curse. If you step on a Lego
Starting point is 00:28:59 and don't yell out a hateful slur at somebody, then you just don't have any feelings. Or you have one of those diseases where you can't feel pain, you know? Yeah, try explaining to Jay Harvin's pops, who was a cop. If Jay Harvin came home and said he was non-binary, his dad would throw him into the refrigerator.
Starting point is 00:29:22 Say, what the fuck are you talking about, son? I brought you up on Long Island. Mateo is awesome. Of course, Mateo. Gay people are awesome. Trans people are awesome. Okay? They're awesome.
Starting point is 00:29:41 And I understand that this activism comes from a place where, you know, they were ostracized, discriminated against. I understand. I understand. But you do yourself no service when you start asking people to call you they.
Starting point is 00:29:55 Then you just, you create reactionaries. You create other extremists. Extremes beget extremes. It's in the Bible, or at least the Quran. I haven't read either. Has anyone, has anyone read the Bible? Has anyone watched the entire Sophie's Choice movie? God, she's a good actress.
Starting point is 00:30:22 So, it was a real big week for important issues. The Washington football team is considering what their new name's gonna be. I think it should represent the city that they play football in. You know, as most teams go with the
Starting point is 00:30:39 spirit, the Indianapolis Colts, you know, the Miami Dolphins, they're in Miami, San Francisco 49ers. I think we should go with the Washington lobby paid for senators. How about the Washington bipartisan hacks? How about the Washington lobbyists?
Starting point is 00:31:05 I like that. The Washington super PAC. Or how about this one? The Washington I wait till I'm out of office to give million dollar speeches
Starting point is 00:31:17 to Wall Street and write a book where I betray everybody. How about that one? How about that one? How about that one? The Washington I can't, the Washingtons I can't write to fuck you over.
Starting point is 00:31:30 The Washingtons I can't wait to fuck you all over in my book. That's a good one. The Washington Felibusters. The Washington Pelosi's. How about that one? The Washington Pelosi's. How about that one? The Washington McConnell's.
Starting point is 00:31:49 The Washington Storm, the Capitol. Those are good ones. Are these some potential names? I think these are, yeah, they hate that they're gonna whittle it down. Okay, they're whittling it down from the Armada? Isn't that Spanish? The Spanish made the Armada famous.
Starting point is 00:32:09 I don't know why they would come into play. Cultural appropriation. Then we got the Washington Presidents. I mean, Jesus Christ, they really do. What do they have, Jimmy Fallon's writing team? For this? I just picture Jimmy Fallon's writers room meetings are just a bunch of kids with crayons.
Starting point is 00:32:28 He just goes to a kindergarten class and they go, let's smash eggs on each other's face. And he's like, that's great. The Red Hogs, the Commanders, the Red Wolves,
Starting point is 00:32:38 the Defenders, and the WFT. What the fuck is that? The Washington football team. Oh, that's the other one. If is that? The Washington football team. Oh, that's the other one. If they go with the Washington football team, they just make it into an acronym. Come on, dog.
Starting point is 00:32:54 Didn't Trump had some space program? What was it called? Like Star Wars or something? Call it that. Galaxy, Washington, the Washington Lewinsky's. Star Wars or something. Call it that. Galaxy. Washington. The Washington Lewinskis. That's a good one.
Starting point is 00:33:11 The Washington Lewinskis. The Washington Gerrymanders. You guys got some good names? Let's go. Comment roulette. What should Washington call it? The Washington WeO China. The Washington Trillion Dollar Debts. what should Washington call it the Washington we owe China the Washington trillion dollar debts the Washington inflation
Starting point is 00:33:30 the Washington come on mans the Washington Kamala's Kamala gave us some sort of speech where she hired like child actors and the CCP silenced your live stream Kamala gave us some sort of speech where she hired like child actors and the CCP silenced your live stream. Oh, the audio's off?
Starting point is 00:33:52 Is the audio off? God damn it. Anyway, have you seen this new picture of King John Un? Kid lost a lot of weight. Could be COVID. That's when I lost a lot of weight and I put it right back on. That's why I was chasing the Mu variant. I just wanted to lose weight easy. We can hear you. You're going full Anne Frank right now. JRM 15. Yes, the audio is off. I don't know what to do. Let's go and restart it
Starting point is 00:34:25 because my brother has to call every day. So now let's just fucking restart it. I don't want anyone listening to this podcast who's a man or a woman who has a full fumade bush. I need you guys to manscape and there's only one company to do that for you. As you know, manscaped.
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Starting point is 00:36:16 Promo code FUMES. I love Talkspace because people often avoid getting help when they're going through something or taking care of their mental health because of the stigma attached to it because of having to find a therapist and getting recommended and talk to people about it everybody's hesitant but talk space really cuts all that out because you do everything from the privacy of your own home. You select your therapist, privacy of your own home. Your sessions are virtual. You do iChats, whatever they're called. What do you call it? FaceTimes. You do FaceTimes with your therapist. And therapy is important for everybody. And it's affordable with this, which is also another reason why people avoid
Starting point is 00:37:02 therapy. And it's important to talk to somebody. Everyone should. My dad always said everyone should be in therapy. It's really good because modern society comes with a lot of stress and especially what we just went through with the pandemic and everything. You got to hit up Talkspace. Okay. So here's what you do. Okay. You go to talkspace.com and you get a hundred percent off your first month when you use the promo code fumes and you sign up. That's a hundred percent. That's a hundred dollars, excuse me, off at talkspace.com with the promo code fumes. You can send messages 24 seven. You can text with your therapist. If you want,
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Starting point is 00:40:18 so cool. I got some craft beers that I liked that I tried that were very cool, and I learned about some brands. So just go hit up boxofawesome.com and you'll see for yourself. So King John Un has lost a lot of weight and people are wondering what happened. He still has the Patrick Ewing flat top though from the 1990s. And I think it's just his diet. I think he's intermittent fasting. He's intermittent fasting because of his own economic system. It's a diet called communism. It's a diet called the system doesn't produce too much food.
Starting point is 00:41:02 He might have been the only person in North Korea who was fat. He's the only one who had access to food. He might have been the only person in North Korea who was fat. He's the only one who had access to food. So King Jong-un, in a move to win over his people, has decided to join in the economy that he forces on them. And he's lost a little weight due to communism. It's a great, it's a great, you know, I want to start a workout video and say, hey, how you doing? You want to lose a lot of weight? Here's the deal.
Starting point is 00:41:30 Everyone's got to share money. You're going to go, shit. There you have it. To each his own according to his need. When you want that second gordita, guess what? You can't have it because that's going to someone else.
Starting point is 00:41:44 You're not free to have two gorditas in North Korea. We could use a little communism to slim this country down. His diet was communism with a side of Hennessy. He does love black culture. Dennis Rodman. Texas, let's get to a little bit of a lighter story. Texas is governor, the first disabled governor in history.
Starting point is 00:42:14 I like to call him Hot Wheels. Hot Wheels has issued a reverse mandate to contradict the federal mandate on vaccines. He's saying, by law, nobody can be forced to get a vaccine. Nobody can be forced to get a vaccine. So, obviously, most of the people who are against the vaccine are very right-wing, very Republicans. This has become a partisan issue, obviously. And the right-wing and conservatives hate big government and government intervention.
Starting point is 00:43:03 I can't help but notice the irony that he is forcing private companies to issue a mandate. It's almost like when you say atheist, they're like, I don't believe God exists, where you're like, that's a belief. That's a belief. Do you know for sure?
Starting point is 00:43:23 And they go, well, I can take it this far. And you're going like, that's not enough. It's a belief. Do you know for sure? And they go, well, I can take it this far. And you're going like, that's not enough. It's a belief. Well, isn't this a mandate? Isn't this government regulation? Isn't this government overreach? What if I'm a private company? And I say, hey, if you want to work for me at my private company, this is what I require. Can't do that in Texas because the government says you can't. So this is the public sector encroaching upon the freedom of the private sector. As the great David Foster Wallace said, and this doesn't bear any relevance, but it's a great quote, ironies abound as ironies do when cash and art do lunch.
Starting point is 00:44:12 I'll just amend that and say ironies abound as ironies do when cash and politics do lunch. Ironies abound as ironies do when politics and belief do lunch also Texas is just Texas loves to talk about how free they are
Starting point is 00:44:38 but there's one thing you're not free to do and that is make a choice about your own body and what's in it. The government there is trying to get involved as well. Ironies abound as ironies do when reproductive rights and belief do lunch. if you get an abortion in Texas, the Justice Department is trying to stop this, trying to force a Supreme Court ruling on this.
Starting point is 00:45:12 We kind of know how the Supreme Court's going to rule, thanks to RBG, which we will get to. But not only are they making it so you can't get an abortion with this, they're putting a bounty on your head, a $10,000 bounty. So if anyone gives an abortion, you can sue them and you can report them. It's like a, it almost sounds a little it sounds you almost can hear the german coming so hello citizens of texas it's me i'm back i am the fascist tendency that rests deep within humanity i show my colors in china also sometimes in other countries, also in America sometimes, we show our colors.
Starting point is 00:46:08 If you see someone assisting someone in abortion or driving them to kill their own baby, report them to the SS, and we will start by finding them ten thousand dollars you can't tell me hate groups are big here used to be do you think the nazis could sell out the garden the way they did in 1930 those kids used to move tickets. Now they can't. The only people selling out the garden is Joe Rogan, a pre-court jerking off in front of women,
Starting point is 00:46:51 Louis C.K., and maybe Taylor Swift. Okay, maybe Sebastian Menescalco. And Nate Bargatze wants to bad. He probably will. But the Nazis ain't selling out the fucking garden, dog. There's not enough Nazis. Do. But the Nazis ain't selling out the fucking garden dog.
Starting point is 00:47:07 There's not enough Nazis. Do you know the Nazis sold out the garden like the 1930s? But so, you know, that's just ironic that private citizens can report other
Starting point is 00:47:19 private citizens and have them sued for $10,000. Governor Abbott. So his vaccine mandate is no entity and no entity in Texas can compel receipt of a COVID-19 vaccine by an individual, including an employer or a consumer
Starting point is 00:47:44 for any reason, personal, including an employer or a consumer. For any reason, personal, conscious, medical reasons, whatever. Prior recovery, whatever it is. So, there you go. If you have a company, you can't. I guess you're free to fire them then, I guess. You can fire them. And say, hey, you know what?
Starting point is 00:48:05 Everyone in my company's got to be vaccinated. I guess you can fire them and say hey you know what everyone in my company has got to be vaccinated i guess you can fire them solution that's what we need just more people collecting unemployment right now because nobody wants to get back to work because they got so freaking used to collecting that government t-check which you know it shows you that the conservatives have a point with welfare because essentially everyone was on welfare for the past year and when you get that check you don't want to rush back into the office
Starting point is 00:48:34 nobody wants to get back to work everyone is stretching it out once you feel that freedom where you can hang out with your family nobody wants to get back especially when you're still in unemployment you know nobody's rushing back to work so you know we have so we have a big problem that could get worse with the supply chain with the economy with inflation with the
Starting point is 00:49:00 with increasing the debt ceiling which is just kicking the ball down the road for problems later. Rising prices because of this clogged supply chain, which is the result of the Delta variant in China. They clamp down hard. If somebody gets COVID in a factory, they shut the factory down or they try to ship the production to keep making money.
Starting point is 00:49:23 They'll ship the production to another factory in another country or something. And that costs money. They'll move the materials by boat. And that is increasing the prices of the shit that we buy for Christmas. So right now you just got all these fucking cargo ships in harbor.
Starting point is 00:49:41 It's all backed up. It's all backed up. Everything's slow. You know, you know it. If you ordered a couch for West Elm, you may not get it till 2024. And that does not sit well with a consumer-based society like we are. So Biden says he's done something to fix it. He's meeting with the ports of, the two biggest ports in the country, Los Angeles and some other port in California. And he's working it out.
Starting point is 00:50:09 I don't know what he's doing. But he also said that like Walmart, Staples, all these companies, FedEx, he's going into emergency mode. They'll be working 24 seven. They're gonna hire new truck drivers. There's also like a truck driver. There's not enough truck drivers
Starting point is 00:50:23 because people don't wanna work right now. They got also like a truck driver. There's not enough truck drivers because people don't want to work right now. They got used to it, man. We all started living like they live in Hollywood where you could just sit around and tweet all day and work once a month for $20 million
Starting point is 00:50:37 and then get up and get your fucking statue and go, you know what the real problem with society is? Living like Mark Ruffalo ain't so bad. Ain't so bad. You make a movie every three years,
Starting point is 00:50:52 get paid millions of dollars, your movie sells well in China because it's a fucking superhero movie. Everyone got used to it. So we got a global supply chain crisis right now. And we'll see.
Starting point is 00:51:10 I mean, I don't know. Biden's doing something. Biden says if the private sector doesn't step up, we're going to call them out and ask them to act. That'll work. Just ask them. Just ask them. And I don't know how you can do that
Starting point is 00:51:27 when you have federal mandates saying hey I mean what happened Southwest there was like 10,000 flights that didn't get off the air that didn't get into the air
Starting point is 00:51:36 and because they just don't have staff or whatever and they're trying to hide the fact that they first they tried to blame it on air traffic control and air traffic control,
Starting point is 00:51:47 and air traffic control was like, everything's fine, dude. JetBlue's up in the air, and it seems to be that there's some staffing shortages, the global supply chain, oil. We don't know. They're keeping it under wraps because this is such an emergency. Biden has such an emergency on his hands right now because if inflation hits, if the global supply chain gets fucked up, because what's happened is you would think it's ironic. You think people don't
Starting point is 00:52:11 have money, but people have a lot of money to spend because they've just been getting their rent paid for, their mortgage paid for, and collecting checks. Some of them still working. So everyone hasn't been spending because they haven't been going out. So now that Christmas is coming and people are starting to go out, everyone is spending a shit ton. They're buying computers. They're buying everything.
Starting point is 00:52:30 It's a real demand. So demand is spiking up the supply. If you can follow me, it's very simple. I'm no economist, but the demand is high right now, but the supply chain is fucked because of COVID. but the supply chain is fucked because of COVID.
Starting point is 00:52:48 The factories just can't produce because they're mad. Once one guy gets COVID, they got to shut down the fucking factory. FedEx and UPS are going to start going 24-7. They've committed to go 24 hours a day, seven days a week to try to compensate.
Starting point is 00:53:09 So have some stores which have extended hours. UPS is going to help. Target, Home Depot, and Samsung, which is where we get most of our shit, is going to ramp up their activities to utilize off-peak hours at the ports. So everyone's going to try to work overtime. They're going to try to hire more people. So what we're basically doing here is trying to balance things back out after a major shutdown, which in nature, as you know,
Starting point is 00:53:37 there is no action that doesn't have an equal but opposite reaction. Meaning, whatever action you take, the check will come. Karma is real. Either you get the check up front, okay? Either you pay for your fucking slice and your slice gets handed to you, or you sit down and eat the slice and you go to the cash register afterward.
Starting point is 00:54:01 Either way, you gotta pay. And we could pay dearly for this because if the economy fucking crumbles, if it cripples, if it buckles under this supply chain crisis and this inflation, I mean, we just kicked up social security for the first time. So this is, everyone's going to get a little increase in their social security due to inflation. Inflation's bad.
Starting point is 00:54:28 Inflation's bad. Now there's inflation every year, but now we have steep inflation. Which is ironic because I heard tax revenue's up because I guess the upper middle class gets fucked. If you make a million bucks,
Starting point is 00:54:47 which in New York City is not that much, you're fucked. If you're making a couple million, you're fucked, which isn't that much anymore, because you don't make enough to hide your money, and you don't make little enough to get all the benefits. You got to pay. So I heard tax revenue is up.
Starting point is 00:55:00 Can you Google that? I think tax revenue is up, which is wild. It doesn't make sense, but they're trying to balance everything out. This is very bad for Biden's presidency. If this shit doesn't work, he's fucked. His numbers are dipping. He's resting his presidency on this. Nobody gives a shit about Afghanistan anymore. We've forgotten about that fucking sloppy exit. Who cares? A couple of fucking Afghani babes were falling out of helicopters. Nobody gives a shit. We're American, goddammit.
Starting point is 00:55:26 He got us out of there. Now let's get to more important news. Like a Seattle school closing on Halloween. Seattle school is canceling its Halloween parade. Because it's offensive. Transgender workers at Netflix are threatening a walkout
Starting point is 00:55:44 because of Dave Chappelle's special. Which if you watch the special is like just honest and reasonable and comedy. You know, it's like, it's very suspect when people don't want you to make jokes about them. Because it always, as a comedian, it seems to me that the people you can't joke about
Starting point is 00:56:11 are the real people who control shit. And that's why I always think it's funny when people say the Jews control shit. It's like, you can crack jokes about the Jews all the time. They have a good sense of humor about it. You can crack jokes about blacks in front of time. They have a good sense of humor about it. You can crack jokes about blacks in front of blacks. They love it. You can't right now crack any jokes about the gays.
Starting point is 00:56:33 They don't like it. But even the gays have a better sense of humor and that's saying very little. Because let me tell you something. I'm speaking specifically to lesbians. Probably one of the worst comedy crowds you could ever perform in front of. Lesbians are just kind of just a little, they're a little.
Starting point is 00:56:53 College students, also horrible. Young people, horrible. So what does that mean? It means our country, as you know, our country is run by money. Who buys the most shit? Young people. So who's creating policy right now? Young people.
Starting point is 00:57:10 Who are young people? Everyone. As I said, we're all living in a period of extended youth. So we're all living in a fantasy land. So what's creating policy right now? Fantasy land. This fucking Native American kid at Yale is in deep trouble because he sent an email
Starting point is 00:57:27 in jest referring to his fucking Federal Society House, Federalist Society, which I guess is a conservative organization. Who gives a fuck? And they said because the Federalist Organization, he's part of the Federalist Organization,
Starting point is 00:57:44 it triggered some people. And because he said they were going to be serving KFC and apple pie, a good American fare, they say it played on tropes of black stereotypes because he referred to it as a trap house. Meanwhile, trap house has come to mean a lot of things. Trap house is slang for a dorm. It's a name of a socialist podcast
Starting point is 00:58:08 called El Chapo's Trap House, which has been lauded and written about in the New York Times, New York Magazine, The Guardian, and nobody has a problem with that. And of course, Chapo. They named their podcast after Chapo's Trap House.
Starting point is 00:58:31 So this is what you call seeing what you want to see. The kid's Native American. Can you get a break, Native Americans? So this upset kids at Yale. Don't use the term trap house in your party invite at Yale in your private email because now they're combing through everything ask John Gruden who I'm not going to make a judgment on that okay you know he's he was an analyst at the time he was emailing people he worked apparently there's more emails coming out.
Starting point is 00:59:13 Obviously, you know, he said horrible shit. Do I care? Me personally, he's a football coach. I don't, you know, I don't, I don't care. But you know, if people care, if the football care, they can fire. I mean, that's what, that's their fucking right. Whatever values they want to promote, that's fine. I don't give a fuck. Does he seem like an asshole? Yeah. Do I mind assholes? Not really. You guys have to understand,
Starting point is 00:59:36 assholes are not the most dangerous people on the planet because you know what you're dealing with. It's the ones who tell you that they have a utopia that they're going to send you to. They're going to kill everybody. Stalin didn't come up and say, hey, what, guys, I'm an asshole. He wasn't fucking Dennis Leary singing a song, stealing Bill Hicks' persona. He was a guy saying, I'm for the people. I'm going to make everyone great and everything great.
Starting point is 01:00:02 And then he murdered everyone. Che Guevara, very complicated figure, a hero to a lot of young people but if you look into the facts, as Ben Shapiro would say, he killed a lot of people. That's who you got to be
Starting point is 01:00:16 cautious of is the people who hide it. The worst people don't announce they're horrible. They pretend to be good. He also reportedly wrote, Goodell should not have pressured former NFL coach Jeff Fisher to draft queers in 2014.
Starting point is 01:00:36 Not good. No bueno. Does anyone know another language I could say that in? Referencing Michael Sam. But you know, he's an old school fucking football meathead. What do you think he's going to say? You think he's going to say it's great? He's an asshole.
Starting point is 01:00:54 Should he lose his job? Probably. But I mean like, you know, don't scarlet letter the guy. That's not how you're going to change people's hearts. Just say, hey man, do you the guy. That's not how you're going to change people's hearts. Just say, hey, man, do you see how that's like not cool? You know, it's not cool. And who knows?
Starting point is 01:01:12 Maybe he was joking. I doubt it. He called Roger Goodell a, can I even say this anymore or do we get flagged? He called him an agate and a clueless anti-football pussy. I know I can still say that word. We're really getting into that George Carlin territory where there's like words you can't even say
Starting point is 01:01:29 on the internet anymore. The internet does not reward quality anymore. It rewards the same thing. When we started, when me and Jesse started, it was like quality. If something was funny
Starting point is 01:01:39 and people shared it, boom, they sent it. Now it's like you have to do the same exact thing over and over and over again. So the algorithm can identify the type of content you are, and then they just send it to the people most likely to watch that content. So it's become very intellectually incestuous bullshit that people are consuming. Nobody gets a different opinion. You know what the algorithm
Starting point is 01:02:02 should do? If there's some crazy racist watching all these racist videos, they should go, hey, how about this? And you send them a Martin Luther King speech. Send them the opposite. If you're watching Yachty Long Days, go, okay, enough about that. How about this? Nanette's podcast. I support that.
Starting point is 01:02:23 And if you're watching Nanette for a long time, be like, okay, take a break. Now go watch Yachtette's podcast. I support that. And if you're watching Nanette for a long time, be like, okay, take a break. Now go watch Yanni's podcast. It should switch it up a little bit. The algorithm is bad news. So a lot of people are getting canceled, a lot of things going on. Obviously Dave Chappelle's special is making waves. lot of people are getting canceled. A lot of things going on. Obviously, Dave
Starting point is 01:02:47 Chappelle's special is making waves as we knew it would. And Ruth Bader Ginsburg is back in the news posthumously. Hef the Art says, I'm just here for Jay Harvin. Redilia
Starting point is 01:03:03 12 says, Yanni is the algorithm. Gruden said, all Greeks are bisexual. He should not be canceled for that. We do have a track history. The algorithm fucking blows. Yanni and Radiolab Podcasts are basically the same thing.
Starting point is 01:03:19 What the fuck is Radiolab Podcasts? I bet you think that because of the algorithm because you listen to both and they recommended me. Can you help my TikTok? I bet you think that because of the algorithm, because you listen to both, and they recommended me. Can you help my TikTok? I only see girls shaking their ass. They steal from black girls.
Starting point is 01:03:31 Yeah, that's true. My porn algorithm can be fucked up now, Yanni. Where is jharvin15? Where art thou? Where's Drew? jharvin15? Where art thou? Where's Drew? jharvin15, there should be a program called the Wokenator on someone's computer that detects when someone says something outdated and says, are you sure you want to say that?
Starting point is 01:04:04 Oh, man. So now gay Superman's son is bisexual. He's the new Superman. And there's scenes in the comics of him making out with what looks like a guy from Antifa, which should give some people on the right a little consolation to at least know he's rear-ending a guy from Antifa. I mean, look at that kid. If that kid's not holding up
Starting point is 01:04:31 a protest sign in Portland, I don't know who is. Yeah, he's making out with a kid with purple hair and glasses. So basically, he's just... He set his grinder profile to Williamsburg. He set his grinder profile to Crystal Lake, LA. Is that where it is?
Starting point is 01:04:56 I don't know. So what? Listen, maybe he's so toxically masculine and he bangs so much push-puss that now, much like Alphas in prison, he's just bodying twinks. Big deal. He's sick a woman, like Magic Johnson.
Starting point is 01:05:17 Now maybe he's just bodying a few twinks because he's so masculine. He comes out on the other side like guys in jail. Why not? I'm just, I just can't wait for the new Superhero Academy. What's it called? Not the Legion of Doom, but the,
Starting point is 01:05:35 you're a comic book geek, former. What's that? The Hall of Justice. The new Hall of Justice where it'll be, it'll be non-binary superman spider person who needs to be referred to as they um aquaman will be aqua they and he will be latin x and of course Wonder Woman Wonder Woman's daughter will be a trans man named Wonder Bobby
Starting point is 01:06:11 who still can't beat Odell Beckham Jr. in a foot race Jay Harmon 15 this is going to be the hardest Superman to greet people people are going to be like
Starting point is 01:06:23 look it's a bird it's a plane and it's a plane. And Superman's going to say, did you just assume my species? So RBG is back in the news posthumously, like I said, because Katie Couric has revealed in her book, in her tell-all book, you cannot trust anyone in the entertainment business because at some point, they're going to write a book and they're going to divulge all your shit. It happens in Washington and it happens in New York and LA. The rest of the country is right we are monsters we are hypocritical greedy
Starting point is 01:07:08 little monsters you are right you normal people are great these people are horrific so supposedly katie curry writes a book and of course the book is sassy because nobody's going to read a book that's not filled with drama so she shits on all her friends all her exes and she reveals that she protected ruth bader ginsburg by editing out disparaging remarks on anthem kneelers go to what she said because i love it um so basically they left that part out because they know RBG is a hero to Kate McKinnon and the rest of the progressive people. She is a hero.
Starting point is 01:07:53 Not to mention the fact that what's happening in Texas right now is her fault. She could have retired when she was 130 under the Obama administration when he asked her to retire because he
Starting point is 01:08:08 wanted to replace the Supreme Court justice to ensure Roe v. Wade remained the law of the land and she refused. She was a fucking justice until the day she died. My favorite is Katie Couric's explanation for why she redacted
Starting point is 01:08:23 this comment from RBG. She said she cut the quote because she felt that she was elderly and she didn't know what she was saying. So the bitch was a Supreme Court justice at the time. So if she doesn't know what she's saying in a fucking interview with Katie Couric, I'm not sure we can trust her in creating common law for the Republic.
Starting point is 01:08:56 RBG said in the redacted portion of the interview that kneeling during the national anthem shows a contempt for government that has made it possible for their parents and grandparents to live a decent life. And I think the part she left in is where RBG said,
Starting point is 01:09:15 I think it's idiotic or something like that, right? But that's the part that she left out. And I don't think that's the whole quote. So get ready to swallow this load, left out. And I don't think that's the whole quote. So, get ready to swallow this load, lefties. RBG has the same opinion as Donald Trump on football players kneeling.
Starting point is 01:09:34 What's the point? This ain't reality TV. Can you stop making heroes and villains out of everybody? Again, a childhood trait that has swept the West because of, I stick to the premise, this era of extended youth that we live in where everyone is playing in a fantasy land. We're not dealing with reality. Adults live in reality where people are three-dimensional, good and bad.
Starting point is 01:10:14 Next thing you know, the next generation, they're going to rip down Abraham Lincoln statues because he said a few things that seems like he didn't want to free the slaves. He lived in 18-fucking-61. What did you want him to stand up there? He's trying to get votes to win president.
Starting point is 01:10:33 You think he's going to go up there like John Brown? Like, I'm going to kill everybody who fucking has a slave. He's not going to get elected. He's not going to be able to become president. He's not going to be able to end slavery, which if you read other portions of his writing, he clearly was against. He was friends with Frederick Douglass. Frederick Douglass also had an influence on him. Do some fucking research and grow up. Stop fucking tweeting simple shit because you're lazy and a child. I'm fucking sick of this. Now, that doesn't go to say
Starting point is 01:11:02 that you didn't do good work by ripping down fucking Robert E. Lee statue Because fuck that guy You made the wrong choice You could have fought for the good guys There should be no fucking Civil War Confederate statues I agree with that shit But don't take down Honest Abe Sometimes they have good points i'm just saying let's treat this on a case-by-case basis as adults
Starting point is 01:11:30 and judge people by the address they lived in in time that's what dates are addresses in time and every address is a different neighborhood and guess what the 1861s is a different neighborhood. And guess what? The 1861s was a different neighborhood. And if you wanted to become president, you had to walk the line. You couldn't always say what you feel. Do you think Obama says what he feels? You can't say what you feel as president, okay? Otherwise, you rattle global markets
Starting point is 01:12:04 and get the chinese very nervous you know who i'm talking about donald trump you can't have an honest person in office you need a good liar that's why obama was so good at it he was like i believe in change and then there was just fucking they would carpet bomb the middle east just carpet bomb He was like, I believe in change. And then there was just fucking, he would carpet bomb the Middle East. Just carpet bomb. He was like, I'll support the Dreamers. Meanwhile, he was fucking catapulting illegal immigrants over the wall. He deported more
Starting point is 01:12:35 illegal aliens than any president in history. That's how you do it! that's the era we're living in right now extended youth people are arguing what reality is nobody knows even what reality is people are saying call me they. The right wing is entrenched in QAnon where they think they're shapeshifters and reptiles
Starting point is 01:13:11 living under the ground. Donald Trump is questioning the election results and trying to pressure people into overturning what everyone admits was his loss in the presidency. People are living in different realities. Some people think a fetus is a baby, some don't. I know that's a gray zone issue, but people are living in completely different realities. You cannot ban abortion. You can regulate it, but you can't ban it. It's like prostitution in that it's going to happen. It's an imperfect system. People like to fuck. They have a drive
Starting point is 01:13:53 to fuck. There's going to be babies. Okay? It's like puppies and a dog. It's an imperfect system. Nature's not perfect. People need to regulate it. Man can't live by bread alone is also a very philosophical statement, meaning man needs rules and laws and regulation. You need a referee in a game. Things can't be unfettered. You need regulation because of human nature and nature. It's not perfect. What do I mean by puppies? Dogs still have a litter of six puppies. Why? Because in nature, you would have so many puppies. Evolution made it so you had so many puppies because in nature, only two or three may survive, sometimes none because of harsh conditions, predators, et cetera. Lack of food. So now puppies live with us and they still have six of them. There's too many puppies. I'm a dog lover. Guess what is a harsh reality
Starting point is 01:14:46 that I have to accept? You know how many millions of dogs are put down every year because of overpopulation? That's what happens when you get rid of wolves and bears and bobcats and deer everywhere.
Starting point is 01:14:57 Guess where the deer go? Into your fucking car and kill a mother and her child just trying to get home. It's imperfect. We have this perpetual vacillation.
Starting point is 01:15:10 That's why no law is permanent. It's not absolute. It's not perfect. You need to vacillate according to the times. Sometimes things need to be a little more liberal.
Starting point is 01:15:22 Sometimes it needs to be a little conservative. That's why the fight in Washington is good to some extent because you need balance. There's no perfection. And the thing that young people do the worst is they believe in perfection. They believe in ideals.
Starting point is 01:15:38 And ideals have dominated the national conversation now because young people dominate the national conversation now because young people dominate the national conversation now because even older people are young people. I am in my 40s and I have Patrick Ewing sneakers on. I am wearing the same outfit I wore when I was 14 years old. We're living in a period of extended youth where everyone is playing fantasy like we did with our friends when we were little.
Starting point is 01:16:09 I have no solutions. I just have to tell you that boxing is not back just because there was finally a good fight that we had to wait 20 years for. Also, Tyson Fury is not one of the best heavyweights of all time. He beat one good guy in his prime kind of one's 38, one's 35
Starting point is 01:16:32 other than that he beat Vladimir Klitschko who was old and guess what, Deontay Wilder who he fought three times knocked him down three times so you can't even compare him to the heavyweights in prior years who fought many great people. I don't even think he could beat,
Starting point is 01:16:55 I don't even think he could beat Buster Douglas. I said it. MMA is the superior sport. It's not as corrupt. You know, sometimes sports function better with a dictator. Dana White's a dictator. People want to see a fight. He makes the fight happen right there and then.
Starting point is 01:17:12 There's fights every week. The whole card is good. Boxing, everyone's like, you know, there's tons of belts, tons of promoters. There's fucking mafia money in there. People dodge each other forever. We had to wait for Mayweather and Pacquiao to fight until they were both like 60. It's ridiculous. They're fighting YouTubers now. That's how you know. Tyson Fury is not the biggest boxing star. You want to know who is? Former Disney star Jake Paul. That's all I have to say. You know who the biggest MMA star are? MMA fighters. You know who
Starting point is 01:17:40 Jake Paul can't fight after a few years of training? Anyone his weight in MMA because he'll get fucking bodied and stretched out. He will get bodied like the boy that Superman's son is fucking in the ass. This is long days. Let's go to the Patreon.
Starting point is 01:17:58 All right, now to our small business sponsors as usual, but before we do that, I just want to give a shout out to the great Jay Harvin 15. Follow him on Instagram, Twitter, Jared Harvin.
Starting point is 01:18:08 Very, very funny. Come see him and me in Maryland. Get the tickets, yannispappascomedy.com. Jay Harvin 15. One more joke, he says, they got to make a remake of Home Alone with AOC.
Starting point is 01:18:23 And in the movie, she lets the criminals break into the house because she feels sorry for them. They were just hungry. And then Jay Harden 15 says, for the Native American kid at Yale, he says, he said it was a trap house, but since he's Native American, the trap was designated for black bear. So there we have it. Jay Harvin, 15 on all socials. Let's give it up for our good friend, Nate Linder. Nate Linder is a marketing consultant. So starting at a hundred dollars an hour, just hit up Nate. He builds websites, runs digital advertising campaigns, and even offers in-depth consulting services to businesses. So natelinder.com, check him out and help him help you with your social media attack. Andrew Cuomo, Secretary, how the freak you guys done? How you done? Zjamarealty.com for all your commercial and apartment rental needs in Brooklyn.
Starting point is 01:19:25 Hit up ZJamaRealty.com, the official realty sponsor of long days. And if you're in the South Florida area, you know, same deal. Grant Trower, granttrower.theatlanticrealtygroup.com, 954-591-6465, at grant underscore trower on the gram for anything in South Florida. He will find you an apartment. He will find you a spot. Hit him up. Chris Minetti. Similarly, if you got a check you need to cash, doesn't matter whose fucking name's on it. If you're in the South Jersey Philly area, there's one person you go to see. You go see him personally, in person. You get to meet the great Chris Minetti.
Starting point is 01:20:10 Just call him. Just call him at 215-750-3730. No website, no social media. That way the IRS can't keep track. Chris Minetti Financial Services. Hit him up. Go cash your business check with Chris Minetti Financial Services. Hit them up. Go cash your business check with Chris Minetti. Michael Hamlet Jr., of course, one of my faves, thebronxbrand.com.
Starting point is 01:20:34 Go support local Bronx artists. They get a cut. It's a revenue share. They got amazing stuff on there. I've bought some stuff. So go check them out. 15% off your order at bronxbrand.com. For shirts, art, whatever, with the promo code FUMES.
Starting point is 01:20:53 bronxbrand.com. Now you know our good friend Reese Ormond, one of our big Patreon supporters. Techvera.com. Love this company, man. For all your cybersecurity tech needs, techvera.com. Love this company, man. For all your cybersecurity tech needs, don't hire an IT department. You know what I mean? Just go to techvera.com.
Starting point is 01:21:14 24-7-365, they help you out. Techvera.com. Then, of course, we got the great Eastside Cheesecakes. Thank God. I mean, dude, I scrolled their instagram last night i just went it just like you can feel you can feel like your sweet tooth it's like looking at porn like it doesn't it makes your sweet tooth hard it's so incredible east side cheesecakes they are on to something man also available at uncle paulie's in the los angeles area hit up east side cheesecakes.com for your cheesecake. Eastside Cheesecakes, all one word on the gram.
Starting point is 01:21:50 And they're going to be shipping nationwide soon. So when that happens, the long haulers, the floodgates are going to open. Aaron Lee for the free.us. All things music and Hawaii. They host free shows, post free music by local artists. If you're interested in learning about new bands or the music scene in Hawaii, if you're a music geek or you're interested in learning about new stuff, which you should always do every day, ForTheFree.us. Check out that site. It's amazing. Rob's Mental Playground in the building. Now, what does he want us to read, fucking Rob? Sick of gift cards and other last-minute BS, crappy holiday gifts? Find your people something different and special this year with robsmentalplayground.com.
Starting point is 01:22:32 For the entire month of November, get 15% off apparel, 20% off prints, 25% off paintings with codes HOLIDAYAPPAREL, HOLIDAYPRINT, and HOLIDAYPAINTING to save on the playground. It's really a playground. Go like, if, who doesn't go get themselves a fucking Rob's Mental Playground piece of art, just because you're a fan of this podcast. Rob's Mental Playground.com. Rob's Mental Playground on the gram. Go get yourself something from Rob. And then we got exclusiveautoshipping.com from Jared Z. If you're moving, you got to ship your wheels anywhere,
Starting point is 01:23:09 okay, in the country, nationwide. They also can ship internationally. That includes Alaska, Puerto Rico, and for the free.us's very own Hawaii,
Starting point is 01:23:21 go to exclusiveautoshipping.com and get your free quote so you can move your fucking wheels. You know what I mean? Thank you, guys. Patreon.com slash Yanni. Long days. Go join for your bonus episode every week
Starting point is 01:23:33 and other content. Go join. Support the podcast. Become a member because who knows when I'm going to get canceled, baby. Now, we got our new Patreon members who have come to our program. Okay, we got some new long haulers
Starting point is 01:23:50 over at patreon.com slash yannylongdays. Let's see if any of them have funny names. Marcus, Martin, Andy Kennedy, Benjamin, a.k.a. Benjamin. Then we got Bryce P., Christina Iwanu Iwanu she's Greek
Starting point is 01:24:07 then we got and then we have Patricidal Michaela Peterson she should just call her podcast Jordan Peterson Daughter Podcast or she should just call her podcast Jordan Peterson's Daughter's Podcast. Or she should just call herself Jordan Peterson's Hot Daughter's Podcast. And then we got Mike and the Gay Pick. Then we got Jack Hickey and Joel Aarons. Welcome, guys. You are our newest members.
Starting point is 01:24:41 Patreon.com slash Yanni Longgaze. Join up, guys. Love all the fans. Please tell your friends. Please go to iTunes. Please go to Apple Podcasts, it's now called, and leave a review and rate it. Please do that. It really helps. We want to get to a thousand ratings. We're almost there. So please, a hundred of you, just go over, take a second, rate and review the pod. And remember to get tickets on my website for Baltimore, for Phoenix, for Florida, Tampa, for New Jersey at Uncle Vinny's. Go to yannispappascomedy.com for tickets. We'll see you next week.

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