Yannis Pappas Hour - War Makes for Strange Bedfellows

Episode Date: December 4, 2021

Democrats just can’t help themselves from continuing to fight a culture war Americans could care less about. They also often get it wrong with their pandering. Expect a Virginia type sweep coming soon. Twitter has a new CEO, is he gonna censor like Google and Facebook? The WTA is pulling out of China, finally some balls on women. Also, Yanni thinks Lebron didn’t have COVID and just needed some time to think because Enes Kanter is making him sweat with his social media assault on him about China. Turns out, Yanni might be right! Alex Baldwin didn’t pull the trigger it was supremacists! It was Donny T! He’s a patsy! And more… Sponsors: Manscaped https://www.manscaped.comPromo code: fumes CBDX https://cbdfx.comPromo code: fumes LongDays is a weekly podcast by comedian Yannis Pappas. Yanni likes to goof on issues from all sides. He likes to poke all the bears. Not for the sensitive. Get your commentary on news & trending topics with Yanni every Sat and a guest chat with interesting, brilliant and hilarious humans every Thursday. Wasdadealis Yanni stand up tour dates & tickets: https://www.yannispappascomedy.comJoin for weekly Bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/yannilongdaysThe show goes out every Saturday night & Thursdays to youtube and podcast audio platforms but while it's being recorded the show goes LIVE on Yannis' Instagram on Wednesdays. Come join in on the LONG DAY & Follow Yannis PappasInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappas Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Buenos dias to my loyal fans and people who have just scrolled through their Twitter or had a suggested video via the algorithm. For the algorithm, I would like to say, I love you. I bow down to you, my robot master. Hopefully, you're seeing this for the first time going,

who's this cute kid? Why does he look so tired? And boy, he better hide those bags under his eyes or else there'll be a smash and grab at the store,

which is his face. Shout out to all the cities that are losing merchandise. And in those people's defense who are doing the smash and grabs, it could be an online store pickup gone bad. Who knows? But we don't need cops. That's for sure. Shout out Seth Rogen, who's going gonna write the new motto for los angeles

it's a wonderful city just don't have anything valuable in your car or person and you'll be fine russia in the ukraine what's gonna go on what is gonna go on between those two people who dna wise you couldn't tell the difference. They're all commies to me. But apparently there's some intra fratricidal beef where they're arming up on the border of who cares? Former USS are. Does Fred Savage from the Wonder Years have a podcast? Or was that just a joke from someone in comment roulette? My live chat that we do while we record this every

day just getting all you new listeners who got here through the algorithm all caught up you're about to watch a guy go see now before your eyes as i am the only real news source left in china uh the pilot the pilot who used to drive uh giz Giseline Maxwell, or as I like to call her, Gasoline Maxwell, however you want to pronounce it. And Jeffrey Epstein's esteemed guest to his very private island, or as I like to call it, Teen Beat Island. If it was a magazine, it would be called Teen Beat. Teen Beat Island, or as I like to call, 18 years old, is she legal? I just, I just trust the porn producer that he checked the credentials. When you watch that fucking teen porn, you just trust.

You just gotta trust whatever producer produces porn that this is an 18 or 19 year old girl because if there are trustworthy people on the planet Ironically, I do think it would be porn producers. Don't trust politicians they And porn producers and everyone wants except for people with morals who are middle class what is it about having so much money that makes you want we'll get to the bottom of that just like i demonetized myself by cursing and talking about in the first couple minutes of this podcast, so we have to fight every week to go from limited monetization to real monetization.

It keeps Jesse writing. He's getting his law degree to keep this show on the air when he puts them up. We got a lot to talk about in the news, in the good old, old glory, and also chilly and why not? Let's talk about what's going on in Malta. This is Long Days and what's the less? What's up everybody, you're not looking at a different person. It is just me, Clark Kent. That was just super Yanni. I just put my glasses on to be able to read my date. So thank you to everyone who came out to Uncle Vinny's Comedy Club at Point Pleasant, New Jersey. We had a great time.

My next date's coming up is at Mohegan Sun at Comics, December 16th through the 18th. Get your tickets at yannispapascomedy.com for all these dates. Then we're heading down to Plano, Texas to catch COVID and also perform comedy at the House of Comedy. That is January 6th through the 8th. Then we're going to San Diego, January 20th to the 22nd to celebrate the new year with people whose families haven't seen their fathers in a long time because they live on a military base. Then we're going to Sidesplitters for one show, February 10th. I believe Ari Shafir will drop by and do a guest set because we're going to smoke cigars afterwards. He's in town too, but buy tickets to my show. Then we're going

to be at the Comic Strip in Edmonton. We're going to Canada at the comic strip in edmonton we're going to canada from february 17th to the 19th then we're going to new westminster british columbia at the comic strip february 26th uh 24th to the 26th then we're at house of comedy in uh bloomington minnesota march 3rd to the 5th and then we're at lol LOL Comedy Club, which I love, down in San Antonio, Texas, March 24th to the 26th. And then House of Comedy in Phoenix, Arizona, April 14th to the 16th. Come see me live.

To access your bonus episode every week, go to patreon.com slash yannilongdays. And please, guys, go to the Apple Podcast app and review and rate the show favorably. It helps serving the algorithm, algorithm, algorithm, Kamala, Kamala, Kamala. Kamala Harris may be being nominated to the Supreme Court or as a judge because Democrats are figuring out that Joe Biden may not make it. He may not make it to 2024. And also his approval ratings are down. And also in polls that are conducted, he's losing to a twice impeached possible head

of a coordinated coup attempt, redheaded, wearing a goddamn hairpiece, former reality TV star who isn't scared to say we need a border. And that's why people align with them, because war makes for strange bedfellows. All Democrats got to do is not call Kyle Rittenhouse, a 17-year-old kid, a white supremacist, before they have any evidence, and they might win, but they just can't help themselves. Even if they're president of the United States, Joe Biden just couldn't help himself, and he called Kyle Rittenhouse, a guy who killed two other criminal honk-a-donks, a white supremacist, even though the case didn't match that. You're

mismatching your outfit, and that's why you're down in the polls. Because Donnie T will sweep in and call him a hero and build a statue to him in gold next to his gold toilet and his gold digging wife. There's gold everywhere in the Trump fucking building in his penthouse. You got a gold toilet, gold forks, and a gold digging wife. So war makes for strange bedfellows, okay? There aren't 70 million Americans who love Donald Trump. There are 70 million Americans who are sick of the bullshit. So the Democrats are trying to figure out what to do next election. And I read one article that said, hey, what we'll do is we'll move Kamala because of course, you know,

in this white supremacist country, a black Indian vice president can fail up like a lot of comedians in the entertainment system. After failed show, after failed show, let's try it again because you got the right politics, baby.

So in a systematically racist country where 12% of Congress is African-American on par with 12% of the population, that's the House of Representatives, maybe a little room to go in the Senate. But in a systematically racist country, which I have to accept, even though the data does not support, you can fail up. You can have one of the lowest approval ratings as a vice president, be a hated presidential candidate and lose early because Tulsi Gabbard just happened to mention your record as, uh, referring to your, uh, you as district attorney in San Francisco and how you locked up a lot of people who you pander to now

because I'm not even sure if she's African-American. Isn't she Jamaican and Indian? Who cares? The Canadian health minister is not Indian. And that just came out. So who cares? Okay. Sean King's white.

I'm Turkish. Jesse's a fucking animal sea lion. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. We'll get to that Canadian story soon because it is hilarious. It's very funny. Another outed liar

trying to live as another race and ethnicity. Those stories are irresistible. They're irresistible. So we'll get to that. But Kamala Harris, her slogan when she ran for president was for the people. And what she meant by for the people is if people, let's see if we can sound out an acronym that represents my own political ambition. No, can't do it. Maybe political's in there, but there's no A's in there. But I'll just tell you for the people means my own political ambition, despite what the people want.

Just call me Hillary Clinton light. The people just keep saying, no, go away. And I just keep coming. Okay. Kamala Harris and Hillary Clinton are also proof that we live in a sexist patriarchal society where only your achievements, only your hard working achievements can propel you forward. Like all the time Hillary put into living in New York and fighting for the people of New York and then moving to a working class neighborhood in New York and then running for Senate in New York and winning because because Yas Queen is here. Okay, all of Soho, all of Barnard University was ready to go out there

and hit the fucking streets for Hillary because she carries hot sauce in her purse when she's got to go on a date with Charlemagne Tha God. So if there's no better proof that this country is a sexist, systematically sexist and racist and discriminatory, systematically, Hillary Clinton, who has not been allowed to move up. She started as the beard, the beard wife of her husband who gets sexual pleasure elsewhere also gets his cigars rolled elsewhere there's two types to roll uh two types of ways to roll cigars one of them is the

old cuban way where an old man sits down and rolls them right in front of you and another way is you just you stick a dry leaf cigar in a wet 21-year-old intern's pussy. That's called the Clinton technique. So she started as the wife of a president and then somehow became a senator, then somehow became a two-time presidential failed nominee who lost to a fake billionaire, Gamcha Hust. failed nominee who lost to a fake billionaire, Gamcha Host. And if you don't think Hillary Clinton is going to make another run for president of Sweden, she will figure it out. She will figure out a way to move to Stockholm for 13 minutes and put her bid in for prime minister

of Sweden because it's a socialist democracy, okay, who has healthcare, which she fought hard for and couldn't get past. She could not get it through. And that was her main objective as the first lady, or as I should say, the first beard, the first lesbian, the first lesbian first lady. I put lady in quotes. The first vice thing.

I mean, she's like Freddy Krueger, dog. I mean, is there anyone in politics more like Micah Myers? Like you try to kill them and they just keep coming. Okay. Her next campaign slogan when she runs for president again should be called Halloween part 26. I'm back, baby. Her and Kamala Harris.

It's Jason Voorhees and Michael Myers. They're back. They will not go away, no matter how many times they fail and lose. So apparently now Kamala Harris may become a justice. They may just make her Supreme Court justice, even though everyone hates her record, even though the liberal people hate her. Conservatives obviously hate her,

but they laugh at her because they know liberals hate her. The Democrats may just, they just don't know what to do with her. She's like the Catholic priest of the Democratic Party. She fucks up in one area and they're like, you know what, let's just move her over here. Let's just move her to another parish where we don't have to deal with her. Let's move her to another branch of government from the executive to the judicial so we don't have to deal with her. And Hillary, she's the Pope. She is the Pope.

she is the Pope. So, also, our politicians keep, you know, we have to get rid of this oligarchy we have. Okay? I remember even back when I used to complain about the oligarchy.

I would complain, oh my God, another Bush. Oh my God, another Kennedy. Oh my God, another another whatever from a powerful family um and now I want them back now I want them back because I don't know how I feel about Dr. Oz running for senate in Pennsylvania, I don't live in Pennsylvania.

Neither does Dr. Oz. Because to the best of my knowledge, he's been doing a pseudoscience fake medicine show on television. So he will be running as a Republican, but TV doctor, will be running against Dr. Ruth and Judge Mattis in what will be one of the most entertaining media-trained elections in Senate history in Pennsylvania. We're getting to the point now where we're all starting to realize that we were better off when we had establishment politicians. And what I mean by establishment politicians is, you know, people with a pedigree who, yeah,

maybe bought their way into Yale with C grades like George Bush did. But at least there was a power establishment in control who wanted to maintain some type of status quo. And status quo is not a word, but status quo is. And most importantly, keep the chaotic gates of hell closed. Because now, albeit it's very funny, it's a little scary when you have members of the Senate

and governors of states, which is your state's president, if you want to use an analogy, calling a member of the Senate, even if you disagree with her politics, calling her part of the jihad squad. You can't have that, okay? I understand that all these social media outlets want to go after comedians.

And now I understand why. It's because we're cutting in on a lot of politicians, journalists, and dark web intellectuals. We're cutting in on a lot of their shtick. The jokes have to be now reserved for people who are elected officials. Here she is back again in the news. And there's no better way to make national news, Lauren Boebert, than calling a member of the Senate part of the Jihad squad and a terrorist the Senate, part of the Jihad squad, and a terrorist because she's Muslim. You're supposed to keep those comments for private parties in your home on holidays. You're not supposed to say those

to constituencies, to your body politic, to your constituents where people are live streaming it for Facebook. Okay. You're not supposed to do that, Lauren Boebert, who then had a phone call with Ilan Omer and surprisingly they didn't get anywhere. She didn't give an apology. Now we have politicians on both sides. I won't call them the Jihad Squad, but I will call them Destiny's Child. Where we have Destiny's Child pandering to the lowest common denominator on the left. Overly educated, full of shit, woke children who don't want to grow up. And then on the right,

we have absolute stone cold pieces. I'm sorry, Jared Harvin. You know, she's a piece. She is a Sarah Palin type piece. She pulls those glasses off and texts, and texts Glenn Rice back. He's going to come over and give her a dick down as well. Glenn Rice, you know, he was a basketball player who played at Michigan and then the NBA who fucked Sarah Palin in college, which made me like Sarah Palin a lot more.

Also, she had the same understanding of geography as me, which made me think I could get a beer with her and try to bang her out without feeling

to look down upon. And now we got this chick who we talked about last time. Laurenuren bobert sarah palin 2.0 who's calling ilan omar a terrorist i'm sure there are some issues you guys could talk about Sure, there are some issues you guys could talk about. This is not Nick Cannon's Wildin' Out. This isn't a dis-off.

You guys are elected officials. Can we please keep the sophomoric comedy on certain podcasts that aren't this one or this one? Here she is. There she is. If you can do a side-by-side, she's kind of Sarah Palin 2.0. She's always photographed in front of American flags. She wears jeans.

She's got a belt buckle. She lies and says she hunts, even though she's just a sweet piece of puss-puss that probably married some oil tycoon and lives in some goddamn redneck place. There they are. Even the media compares it to Sarah Palin. Why not? It gives you something to write

about that's not issues that aren't important to working class people that aren't issues that actually make a difference. You journalists can just do your click bait fucking car crash side of the highway articles that I'm supposed to be talking about on this podcast,

but you actually write articles on them about how she's the new Sarah Palin because they both have glasses and they're both above a six on the fuck me scale. I mean, this is the fucking country we live on. We're an absolute goddamn joke. D John Hickey says, more like status crow.

He likes it. Mitash O. says, do I buy the dip on the Omicron dip Dr. Giannis? Debate subjects. I'd love to see Ilhan Omar.

I got to pull out a snooze on this one because I'm frustrated. I mean, it's getting to the point where it's absolutely ridiculous. No matter how much you disagree with Ilhan Omar's politics, can we have a little respect for the office a little bit?

Can we have a little decorum? And I'm sure I could find a hundred things that Lano Mars has said that probably don't respect the office either. But you guys, you're Congress people. You're a governor. Can you at least learn how to speak like an adult? In order to be an elected representative,

I can't hope to want to get you on this podcast. Okay? Do you understand what I'm saying? At this point, I think there's a fairly good chance I could call her office and be like, can we get Madam Boebertbert available on a Wednesday via zoo to check in with Giannis Pappas and Jared Harvin and Jesse Skituro to talk about the Jihad squad?

My God. Oh my God. I'm not also convinced that Ilana Amar wears her headpiece because of her religion. I do think part of it is a reason why I consider wearing a headpiece is because we both got five heads. The chick's forehead starts at the back of her neck. She needs bangs, dog.

You need bangs and so do I. I got a big forehead too. Cuck knocker says, in order to be elected, all you have to do is be rich. Sad but true. I don't think that's all you have to be now. And that's the point. I admit, I don't think that's sad either.

I want those people back. I want those people back because they're forced to learn which fork to use and they're also forced to go to Ivy League schools even if they pay for their grades they're around smart people who earned it and that's better than having Miss Bobert and Ilan Omar go at it in a fucking Knicks cannon dis off for the media yeah there's her forehead it's big at it in a fucking Nick's Cannon dish off for the media. Yeah, there's her forehead. It's big. You could land a fucking plane on Ilhan Omar's forehead.

I'm sorry. Those comments are supposed to happen here, Madam Boebert. I can't wait to hear what Dr. Oz has to say about this when he weighs in during his campaign. So Dr. Oz is running for the Senate.

And disappointingly, Matthew McConaughey said he's not gonna run for governor of Texas. I'm all for a military dictatorship. I'm all for somehow getting this back in order where you either have to go to Yale or Harvard to have any power in this country. I want to get back to it. I thought I was a fan of democracy

until this republic started looking more like a democracy and less like the oligarchic republic we traditionally have been. Let's get back to the fake democracy where you feel like you have a choice, but it's not really a choice. Okay. It's two people who are both skull and bones brothers from Yale and they fake fight like the WWE and they come from powerful families and they have officials in their pocket and whatever, okay? They hunt ferret. They go fox hunting.

They ride horses. They wear masks and fuck whoever. I don't want to know how the sausage is made. I just want these gates of hell closed. I don't want The Rock seriously considering a run for president. I don't think King Z in the CCP fears The Rock who before he meets with him will probably ask

how his biceps look and is there a makeup person? And where's my iron paradise? Because I need to work out and have my cheat meal before I meet with the most powerful person on the planet

and hopefully future sponsor of this show, King Z. Call me. How much more do I got to try to woo the CCP into making me an agent for their ascension? God damn it. I do good work. Someone said ZOA energy. That's his vitamin drink.

Yeah, we can't have a president who has a vitamin energy drink. You know, that's what I thought before we had a president, Jared Harvin's calling, right in the middle of the episode. That is right before we had a president, Jared Harvin's calling, right in the middle of the episode. That is right before we had a president. This is after we had a president,

pardon me, who had a board game at airlines, appeared on WWE wrestling, married a woman who showed her tits. Unbelievable. There's the Trump board game. He had a board game. I've never seen this before.

Yeah. Had a board game. Jared Harvin, if you're watching, we're doing an episode with you after this. So just come on in. Ring the bell, goddammit. We can always pause it. Do you like getting zooted?

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promo code fumes for 20 off and a free gift i don't know what that free gift is. You tell me. Anyway, we got a new CEO of Twitter. I thought he was a woman. I think I said in my bonus episode, because his name was Argyle Wall. I said he was South Asian. I was correct about that. But apparently it's not a woman. It's a guy.

It's a guy who Elon Musk supported because he put a generalized tweet out and said, South Asians have done great for this country. Because I'm sure all his engineers at Tesla are South Asian. Asians and South Asians just run STEM. They just run it. He's the new CEO of Twitter. He's got the stamp of approval for Elon Musk in a very general racist way.

Not racist, but way. Not racist, but racial. Not racist. I guess it's a compliment, but Elon Musk tweeted, Indians do good for us. So he just kind of just threw him in an Indian category. So it's not racist, but kind of a little. It's like, what do you know about the guy individually? Of course, content creators are worried that this is going to be the beginning of the crackdown like Facebook has done and YouTube, Google, where they censor speech. Facebook, by the way, just unblocked. I mean, this is just the world we live in. This is getting dangerous. Facebook has just unblocked written house searches. Before that, they had blocked written house searches. So you couldn't read about written

house or get any opinions on written house. That's not the way, guys. This is not the way. The CCP way is not the way. Censorship is not the way. Allowing people to hear stupid opinions is the way, okay? Better education is the way and patrolling fake accounts is the way. I know you don't wanna do that because that hurts your bottom line because those fake accounts increase your engagement and you can bullshit your stockholders after you've gone public that,

look, we have 20 million users on Twitter. Bullshit. Okay. You got Jordan Peterson. You got the Weinstein brothers. You got a few comedians and the rest are Chinese and Russian bots. And you know it. Everybody else is at work.

They're not on Twitter. They don't care about Dave Chappelle special. And that's it. But, you know, Twitter was the most free site. Like what you could, you know, as long as you didn't threaten anybody or anything dark like that, they kind of let everything fly.

I mean, there's porn stars on there showing full porn, comedians making jokes, and they're the least censored. So now there's, and that was Jack Dorsey's rule as CEO. And now he steps down to, I don't know, go live off the land. I don't know what he's going to do. Go be a Buddhist monk or pull the bedbugs out of his beard. Who knows what's going on?

I don't know what he's going to do. But much like all the tech CEOs, he's going to be a goddamn billionaire and look like a homeless person. Can one of these guys get a suit? Like, can one of them look decent? Why did the nouveau riche always dress the most expensive and the most rich look like they're, they showed up out of a time capsule looking for a beach boy concert? I mean, look at this guy's wearing a tie dyed shirt. He's got a tattoo on his elbow like Sergio Chacon

and he's worth a billion dollars he looks like a kid who's trying to make it in the open mic scene at the Creek in the Cave in Austin can one of these guys put a goddamn fucking Banana Republic suit on at least

Jeff Ross apparently said and this is a quote for him Twitter and Facebook are not good comedy rooms. You're goddamn right about that. And now everyone's worried about Twitter not becoming a good comedy room because they unearthed one of Argyle's old tweets. Can we pull it up?

It'll be the first thing that comes up. Much like this is the era of there is a paper trail for everything. Anything you've done or said will be unearthed by bots or incels who have nothing better to do. Toe Master Strangler says Jack Dorsey will do an interview with Coop or Oprah to talk about how hard life is. Those are the two go-tos, Anderson Cooper and Oprah. Love those two ladies. Yanni, how often do you check Twitter? Honest question. I'm on it all day because it's the last pace. I'm still free. So Argo Wall's tweet that people are worried about that was unearthed, I think, from 2012 says, If they're not going to make a distinction between Muslims and extremists, then why should I distinguish between white people and racists?

Welcome the new ceo of twitter and his first ruling went into effect yesterday when we were recording this can you pull up his first policy decision which is making people go here we go again on my own going down the road I've only known. I don't know the words to this, but I assume the song's about feeling lonely. All social media CEOs must be autistic. That is a requirement. That is true.

Thank you, 416 John. Giannis for president. Why not at this point? Why not? Logan Bagley 87. If fake news porn gets canceled, I don't know what to believe in anymore. Omar's Wild.

Join the long day discord where there is no censorship and you can drop hard Fs with an occasional N. That's not the best advertisement for my Discord, Omar's Wild. The only thing that saves it is that you're a Sandra D. You're from a part of the world that is protected speech. It's a protected speech. You're part of the world where the new CEO

is concerned to protect. So his policy decision basically his first policy decision Jesse's got a tough time Googling this shit. Did you find it? Yeah, right here. So it says sharing personal media

such as images or videos can potentially violate a person's privacy and may lead to emotional or physical harm. Can we lose the emotional part? Can we all stop being insecure 11-year-olds? How about the physical part? Can we stop regulating speech to try to guess and proactively protect people's feelings, which are very, very mercurial and unpredictable and oftentimes based on things that have nothing to do with the thing they were offended about because people project

and they're narcissistic little babies? Can we maybe do that? But the second part of the quote is where it gets very interesting. The second part of the quote, if you could go down, Jess, I'm sure they add it. Is this will protect, do they put it? Can you get the full quote? The second part of the quote talks about who he in particular wants to protect. They didn't. Do they put it? Can you get the full quote? The second part of the quote talks about who he in particular wants to protect. And it sounds like a woke dog whistle. Poodle over here. AOC, Voltron, activate. Long day's drinking game. This is from 416 John Take a shot every time Giannis puts his glasses back on and off

Gianni from this angle with the glasses You look like Joe List's gay gay gay gay uncle Pug is here for the meme Says classic Greek mansplaining Skeezy O I want people to stop calling me a cuck So no we need more speech cops you got it skeezy you got it skeezy you got it the full quote from argwall paraphrase it, basically says, he states, I have in mind members of minorities or activists from

disenfranchised groups and minorities in particular. He specifies. I'm paraphrasing. just don't know why you have to specify, why you have to try to, you know, basically signal your politics in your policy decisions because it's transparent. Why are you picking sides? Why can a member of, let's say, a majority opinion or race, to my knowledge, I think, quote unquote, white. I don't know. I mean, because white people could care less about each other. They also have ethnic groups and cultures. Go figure. You wouldn't know that from the media. But white people are also very different and variegated. But a fairer skinned person might be discriminated against too, Mr. Argyle Wall.

So why would you discriminate? Why? Or someone from from majority opinion. For example, the majority opinion being, we like Dave Chappelle's special. I like Dave Chappelle's special, and guess what? I do support trans people, and I don't want to harm them. That seems to be the majority opinion, but that is not the agreed upon acceptable opinion by whatever force has taken over the zeitgeist that is represented in the media and from corporate figureheads. So what if it's a person

who has a majority opinion like that? Are you not going to protect them? Are you only going to protect the 10 people who stood outside Netflix with signs and said Dave Chappelle is the devil? One of which you can find in a very video on Twitter having very, very racist tweets that someone made a video in between her speech about how Dave Chappelle is such an oppressor.

He reads them and has them read in a computer voice. He reads her tweets, this trans woman in the computer voice about how Chinese people and Hispanic people, it's so funny. Go to Twitter and Google it. Manscaped.com. Guys, my fan base needs to be fume-free and Manscaped is the best line of defense against fumes. You got to mow down that muff with Manscaped and your performance package 4.0 needs to be called yours. Okay. You have to have your own performance package 4.0.

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Uh, the performance package is an incredible gift for yourself and for somebody else. And I mean that. I use it. We all got one. Jesse's got one now. they sent us so many. So go to manscaped.com. Of course, the promo code is fumes to get 20% off and free shipping. Promo code fumes, Manscaped. Let's battle fumade together. Now, I know you see a smoothie on my desk. That's because Jay Harvin just walked in his studio. Jared Harvin. So let's talk about maybe why he left.

Why did Jack Dorsey leave? A lot of conspiracies. Was it because he wanted to get out while the getting's good? Probably. Is it because he's scared that when there's a red wave coming, they go after him for booting Trump and then not allowing... What did they not allow again, Jesse? The Hunter Biden laptop story.

They did not allow the Hunter Biden laptop story to flourish. The second of which, legitimate story, deals with China. What's going on? As we've said, if that was Donald Trump Jr., there'd be big, big, big news stories on that. So maybe he just said, you know what? I don't want to deal with that. What do I mean by the red wave, Coven? See Virginia as an example. See Eric Adams being elected. You can only get elected really in New York nowadays if you're a Democrat to mayor. And Eric Adams really couldn't have more of a moderate position to get elected as a rebuke of, what's his real name?

Wilhelm Werner, Mayor de Blasio in New York. So Eric Adams, who is a Democrat, but he's kind of a hawk on crime and very anti-woke, won the election handedly. So if you look at Virginia, you look at that, you're going, hmm. Also, guess what? New mayor in Atlanta. And guess what he ran on? Guess what he ran on?

Crime. Cleaning up crime. He didn't run on defunding the cops. And he won. So you can assume there's gonna be some Republicans who are who win

in the midterms, etc. You can assume it's gonna happen if you look at Virginia as any indication. If you look at Atlanta, you look at New York and those local. Yeah. New. His name is Andre Dickens.

He's a councilman. My girl Keisha stepped down. I loved having a mayor in the news named Keisha. Okay. I felt like I was in high school again. I felt like I was on the phone talking, getting help with my science homework. I had a friend named Keisha. She helped me with the science homework.

She was good at science. That was back in the day. You remember back in the day we used to talk on the phone? I used to talk on the phone for hours. Every night after school. Every night after school, you'd be on the phone for hours. Keisha, she stepped down. And I know why she stepped down.

She's like, I'm not dealing with this shit. I'm not fucking dealing with this shit. So Andre Dickens wins. He's an engineer, smart kid. If I remember correctly, he's a, he's an engineer by trade. And he ran on, you know what? I got solutions for crime. We're going to do this because every city right now,

the crime is up. You know, homicide rates up 30 percent and all the cities um despite Seth Rogen's best efforts crime's up crime's up so there will be a lot of candidates running on that and winning winning on it so the WTA the female the WTA has pulled out of tournaments in China costing them

millions and millions and millions and millions of dollars we're starting to see a little bit of pushback against the CCP and it comes in two forms a little bit of pushback against the CCP. And it comes in two forms. The WTA, who was concerned about that Chinese female doubles player who tweeted that she got sexually assaulted by a high-ranking member of the CCP

and then disappeared for two weeks like Jack Ma and then reappeared with a smile on her face but not saying anything, which is what they call sus. What you call sus. And so the WTA did speak. They were able to speak to her on the phone. She retracted her statement. Go figure. She retracted her tweet in those two weeks where she disappeared. She changed her mind about what happened. She apparently tweeted she was raped and then all of a sudden took a two-week vacation. I can only assume she went to Thailand and laid on a beach and really thought about it and said, you know what? I think I made that up. I think I made that up or I was hacked. And now she's saying it didn't happen. And I guess it's a little fishy to, how should I say this? Anyone who's bipedal and has a brain,

but especially a WTA who said, we're not convinced. And you know what? We're putting our fucking moral money where our mouth is, which is what I love to see. Now, here's the deal. This is why I love this story, and I'm talking to you, Mark Ruffalo. I'm talking to you specifically, and I'm talking to a few other of you.

I'm talking to you. I'm talking to a few of you big mouths online. Put your fucking money where your mouth is. You want my respect? Put your money where your mouth is, You want my respect? Put your money where your mouth is. Okay? Don't just tweet something. You believe in a cause? The next Hulk is going to be Michael B. Jordan. Not you. The next Hulk is going to be Elliot Page and her six pack. Not you. I want to see you sacrifice your paycheck. Because what the WTA did here was they said fuck

that we're concerned we're concerned morally about this and we're not going to partner with China we're not going to make money with China we're pulling out and guess what we are going to lose hundreds of millions of dollars doing it, to make a point. That's the way you change the world. Are you willing to sacrifice your personal interest for a principle? I don't see a lot of that going on with these content creators online either. I just see a lot of pandering to bases like politicians do. Shout out to the WTA.

I'm taking a position here. I'm not just going to be a bear poking. This is my mom as a human rights being in my fucking, being in my DNA. Shout out to the WTA. Shout out to Enos Cantor, who is making LeBron feel very uncomfortable right now that he had to take some sick days. Enos Cantor is really annoying LeBron James right now. He's annoying LeBron. He's not annoying Michael Jordan because Michael Jordan does not have emotions.

He just wants his team to win, and he will punch Steve Kerr in the face to do it, and he will fucking yell at Will Purdue to hit that 12-footer, or he will fight him openly on the court. Michael Jordan doesn't care. He doesn't even know who, he's got so much money. He's so famous, he doesn't even know who Enos Kanter is. And he's also not of the Twitter generation, okay?

He smokes his cigars, his eyes are bloodshot, and he just, he sleeps on a bed of his goddamn money and his glory as the greatest athlete of all time and one of the most famous men to ever live. Meanwhile, LeBron, who can't get respect on his name because people say he doesn't have the killer instinct of Kobe Bryant.

Okay? LeBron is getting prickled by Enos Kanter's constant tweets. He's tagging LeBron in them, going, LeBron, what do we think about the slave labor in China? And LeBron's going, will you shut the fuck up? I'm trying to get Russell Westbrook to buy into a team concept.

I don't have time to think about these bigger issues. All right? I only have time to think about these bigger issues. All right? I only have time to tweet about Kyle Rittenhouse occasionally and do a lot of other good. Because here's the deal. LeBron does a lot of good. He does a lot of good for the community. And LeBron is one of the greatest

and he doesn't get his respect. But there is this China stain on LeBron. When that Houston general manager slipped up and he criticized't get his respect. But there is this China stain on LeBron. When that Houston general manager slipped up and he criticized China, okay? LeBron made a statement and I'm not gonna ask Jesse to Google it because we will never find it. But the statement was,

and since this is real news, I'll just paraphrase. I will be responsible and paraphrase. The Houston general manager, if you don't know basketball, stop calling me Paul Verzi. How do you turn it on fucking silent again? Swipe down. Thank you very much.

But that says do not disturb. Thank you. A little help from Gen Z never hurts. Now I have to restart this because we went silent again. You can roll this because you know i never learn it's i never learned jared taught me how to do this last time and i still never fucking learned and i'm sure paul verzi wants to talk yell at me about how the knicks should have won did the knicks lose last night yeah i mean paul verzi give it up they suck

okay we're not on a roll and don't tell me about their draft class and how it's going to change around as long as James Dolan is the head of that organization they're gonna lose because it's a sold-out crowd and he doesn't care and you know so back to Lebronny so the situation was I can't read it can you can see that, Jared? Maybe you can just help out. Can you read this? Yeah, it says, Lakers, LeBron James on NBA's China controversy. I don't want to get into it. Feud with, his name was Daryl Morey. But I believe he wasn't

educated on the situation at hand when he spoke. That is what you call the opposite of what is true. That is what you call the opposite of what is true. That is what you call the opposite of what is true. Now, LeBron is not a dumb guy. He's a smart guy. LeBron was saying that because he has to say that

because Bronny makes millions of dollars with China. Also, LeBron is a good company man, and the NBA makes a lot of money with China. Like the entertainment business, we make a lot of money with China. What are you more likely to see? What are you more likely to see? Elliot Page beat Odell Beckham Jr. in a foot race

or The Rock ever tweet something critical about China. It's a tie. It's a tie. It's a tie. Because let me tell you something. If The Rock gets drunk on his cheat day, which I follow him on Twitter, he has a cheat day.

He likes to drink his own tequila and have about 10, 15 cheeseburgers and a bunch of cookies while he kicks back and shows us pictures of his feet and television. If he decides to get a little drunk on that tequila and accidentally tweet something true about China, you will see an apology video in Mandarin with him and John Cena going,

and the subtitles read, I'm sorry. Hello. Taiwan is China. One China. I misspoke. And then to quote the LeBron James, the great LeBron James, I wasn't educated on the situation. All the people in the factories are alive and well. There's rights there.

I mistook, yes, all these social media and free speech isn't allowed there. Yes, there was a tennis player who disappeared for two weeks. Yes, there was a billionaire who said something out of pocket. He disappeared for about three months until Elon Musk said, hey, where's Jack Ma? Yes, there's a billionaire who said something out of pocket. He disappeared for about three months until Elon Musk said, hey, where's Jack Ma?

Yes, there's a crackdown on Taiwan and democracy. Yes, there's potentially a virus that was engineered as a tactic to fucking stall everyone's economy while the CCP did a military buildup, building supersonic missiles and using American warships in the desert as target practice yes they do take certain ethnic groups maybe uh one of which is called the ugar muslims and put them in concentration camps and there's fucking drone footage of it yes but i'm not educated on the situation so So Enos Kanter is really just, the guy has like a death wish, dog.

If you don't know, we've mentioned it before. Enos Kanter is, there's also a dictator in Turkey, my favorite people, of which I can't get around the fact that I have it in my DNA. So that's what makes me such a slippery bastard. You can't trust me. That's why the Greeks don't trust me.

They knew something was wrong with me from the beginning. Okay, because they're torn on my character, Mr. Panos. A lot of them think it's a horrible portrayal of a Greek and it is. It's called comedy. You fucking humorless cunts. Stop watching comedy with the whole family. Get your own taste. Leave your mother's house and go grow up. Stavros, you're 56. Cook your own own meals you're allowed to watch comedy with a perspective you don't gotta go with your grandparents and children to a fucking comedy show that's hosted by a church now all the Greeks hate me

but I do have some Turkish DNA and that's why they don't trust me Enos Cantter is as Turkish as Turkoglu, who was another Turkish player who was pretty good, Sacramento King. He's a Turkish kid and the kid's got fucking huge balls where he spoke out against the dictator there.

He's not allowed in the country. He's constantly harassed like worried about his safety. And now he's decided to take more on his plate. Like a lonely, in his canter with like putting himself in danger with major players, you know, major powers. major powers, it reminds me sort of like a middle-aged ex-wife who's been scorned by a husband who cheated on her, gets a cat, gets two cats, and just keeps putting more burden on her plate until she ends up with 15 cats, a pony, a horse, and a dog, and wonders why her life is hard. and a dog and wonders why her life is hard. It's because you're trying to fill an emotional void. Enos Cantor, you do not have to be this hero dog.

You got millions and millions of dollars. You live in the United States. I think he has asylum here, right? I think he has like some sort of asylum. He just became a citizen. He became a citizen. I think it was because he was in asylum. And he changed his last name to Freedom.. And he changed his last name to Freedom.

Yeah, he changed his last name to Freedom. So him and Metta World Peace are going to do an album. It's going to be positive hip hop. And he changed his name to Freedom. And the kid's just going wild. But the thing about Enos Cantor is he's right. What he's saying about China is on the money. He's even going so far as to put, wear sneakers with just blood splatter all over them.

And he keeps tweeting at Michael Jordan and LeBron James saying it would be nice to have you on board. Now, I bring up LeBron James because he's been acting thorny. He's been out of sorts recently. LeBron James is starting to play a little bit like Metta World Peace. There was an elbow to the face, which he calls was completely accidental. When you watch the video, look, I am an old school kid who remembers 80s basketball.

I remember the Celtics, the Pistons, and the Lakers. I remember what a Rick Mahorn foul looked like. You can watch that video as many times as you want, LeBron James. You knew where his face was. You know how powerful you are. One of my favorite things is when actually Chris told me he was sitting next to Yakeem Noah on a flight, and they started talking about basketball. They started talking about LeBron James. And they said, the you don't know about lebron james is he's probably the strongest basketball player that's ever played basketball he's like yakeem

noah's a big dude and he said when you when lebron james is going downhill and you bump him like you try to bump him, you go flying. When he goes to the hole, when he goes downhill to the hole, like he moves your body out of the way. Okay, but LeBron James is like a great team player. All you'd see him is pretending like he got fouled. He never played physical like that. This is very out of character for LeBron James.

He fucking decked that dude. He's a third string, I don't even remember his name. What's the guy on Detroit? Nobody knows. Isaiah Stewart. Isaiah Stewart was not happy about it. Nobody reacts that way when they feel like it was an accident. He chased LeBron James all around the stadium.

He even like, if you don't know it, people were joking, calling it the malice in the palace part two. Like they could not calm the dude down. Because when you get hit by LeBron James, first of all, you're going to break skin. I think his nose was bleeding. His eye was bleeding. His face just was bleeding everywhere. And he chased him all over the fucking palace or whatever it's called now that they moved out of the palace.

It's probably some cell phone. What is it called? They tore down the palace. Yeah, crypto.com marino or ford center yeah ethereum ford.com whatever the fuck all these soulless names now you know used to be nice when you called it shea stadium what is it now fucking subway jared stadium everything's corporate sponsored soulless jills what is it ford stadium now? Gillette Stadium? I mean, it's a razor.

Why do I got to call my football stadium what I'd shave my balls with? Sorry, Manscaped. Manscaped. I shave it with Manscaped. Dude, he's pissed. Yeah, look at how

fucked up his face is. He knows. He knows. You don't react that way if it's his intention. So LeBron James has been acting out of sorts. His team's losing.

He's been acting out of sorts. And now all of a sudden, mysteriously, LeBron James has been acting out of sorts. His team's losing. He's been acting out of sorts. And now all of a sudden, mysteriously, LeBron James is out. Okay? He's out. I don't know if you've heard about this. He's like, and nobody's giving any details. They're maybe assuming it's COVID. But all they're saying is he's under protocol, right?

Like health and safety protocol. I saw something that he has COVID. Now he has COVID. Despite being vaccinated. Huh? Despite being vaccinated. Just like Joel Embiid. Mm-hmm.

Who you know is obese, and that's why he struggled, couldn't breathe, because he's obese. So LeBron James out indefinitely. Oh, so they're saying it's COVID protocols. Mm-hmm. Is it COVID protocols protocols or is he just stressed out is he just saying i need a break from enos canter's tweets because if you go to you see i like to follow this stuff because it's fun i like to you know a lot of people probably aren't following this because it's like a subplot and the media is still probably focused on

chappelle's special but um enos canter will not stop and now he's going and making immediate appearances and he's bringing up lebron james's And now he's going and making immediate appearances. And he's bringing up LeBron James' name. And he's like haunting him. And LeBron James wants no part of this, dog. He wants no part of it. There's the sneakers. Now, do I blame LeBron James?

He's probably going, China's not my fucking business. I don't care. Those aren't my people. Fuck them, right? But it does kind of make you a little bit of a hypocrite because as Martin Luther King said, any injustice anywhere is a threat to justice somewhere. So if you're, it hurts your credibility too. It hurts your credibility as a social justice advocate,

which LeBron is very outspoken for, you know, his community, for the black community, for police brutality. But then when it comes to something like this, let's see what he's saying. I am informed and educated on the situation. So he's writing that on the sneakers. Hey, and he put LeBron James's crown on the sneaker.

He is fucking haunting LeBron James now. And oh my God, that's a picture of LeBron James on the sneaker. He is fucking haunting LeBron James now. And oh my God, that's a picture of LeBron James on the sneaker. Oh, with Kingsley putting the crown on him with bags of money behind it. Now here's the deal. Enos Cantor is a Turkish kid. So LeBron James can't even go, oh, this is some fucking white racism. He's just stuck. LeBron James is just stuck in this. And Enos Kanter's going hard. Because he's a swarthy muzzy from Turkey. And he knows Enos Kanter's right.

So it's like, if I was LeBron James, I'd say, look, I need a couple personal days to figure out how to stop this guy or to figure out a way to have him disappeared because LeBron James dude LeBron James is like worth like three like almost a billion dollars most of that is tied up in China with his sneakers with the NBA etc the NBA is tied up with china big time it is the biggest market for the nba it is where all the apparels made etc you get it i don't have to get into detail so here's enos canter enos canter now this is my opinion dog enos canter may have a mental illness and that's why he's going too hard just like john brown was a crazy kid okay but john brown was on the right side of history john brown was definitely out of his fucking mind because you have to be out of your fucking mind to do that but he was on the right side of history okay enos

canter is probably out of his fucking mind because he's drawing pictures of lebron jay's getting his crown put on by king z he's drawing the quote that he said about the Houston GM on the sneakers. Hey, still searching and getting educated. And then there's a picture of a crown. We know who you're talking about because you're tagging him in your tweets. So he is antagonizing and he is intentionally pointing out LeBron James because LeBron James is bigger than the sport. He's one of the most famous people on the planet.

And he tweets, money over morals for the king. I don't think he's referring to the king of heavens, Jesus. He's referring to a marketing Nike campaign where he's called King James. And then he says, sad and disgusting. I mean, the kid is going hard. I'll talk about two people.

I remember it was Maria Taylor and Rachel Nichols. And I said in this podcast after that ESPN controversy happened, I said, talk about two former colleagues who won't be going to brunch anytime soon. Talk about two basketball colleagues who will not be meeting up for coffee anytime soon and will not be saying good game after the Lakers are in bean town. And you also know that Danny age and the Celtics are probably going like, what the fuck did we sign up for? Okay?

Because we're in bed with China too. The NBA is in bed with China. Can we shut this freaking muzzy up? Yeah, the Rachel Nichols, that was a funny thing where Rachel Nichols was caught off camera saying she doesn't – Maria Taylor got the job because she's black. And they were friends, and everyone loves Rachel Nicholsols if you remember and then um what's his name uh Stephen Jackson came out and defended Rachel Nichols and I made the joke that uh how do you say you're

fucking Rachel Nichols without saying you're fucking Rachel Nichols anyway let's go back to the tweet because let's finish that tweet up anyway let's go back to the tweet because let's finish that tweet up um i'm sorry jess i know i'm fucking throwing you all over the place now you gotta find it again you just had it okay the rest of it is sad and disgusting how these athletes i love how he's beating around and he's got crowns everywhere and he's got the king but he's going these athletes we know who you're talking about my friend how these athletes pretend they care about social justice hmm who could that be is he talking about um who could he be is he talking about butler in miami who could it be russell westbrook in his

outfits who could he be talking about? Is it the unibrow himself? Maybe he's referring to the great Greek basketball player, Niko Scalise from Jersey City, who won a Euro championship. I don't know. I can't figure out who he's talking about. The king in quotes,

and he puts the king in quotes. So he's antagonizing. He's like, are you a king? And then he says, further hint. We got another hint here. They really do shut up and dribble. We remember that controversy from when that bitch on Fox told LeBron to shut up and dribble when big boss says so. And he puts a red Chinese flag there. Okay. I mean, is this a long days podcast? Then he says, did you educate yourself about the slave labor that made your shoes?

Or is that not part of your research? Here's the thing, Enos. To take LeBron's side to play devil's advocate. If I was making millions and millions of dollars from those shoes, that would not be part of my research either. I would, what you call, turn a blind eye to that. Okay? Because as the great George Carlin said,

not in my backyard. If it's not happening in my backyard, I don't want to know about it. So it's a fun thing happening here, and I'd like to see how it plays out. But part of me does suspect that LeBron has taken a few personal days to just figure out how to... Maybe you'll have to bleep that out.

Toys R Us is back. Yeah, good luck with that. They got a new flagship store going up somewhere. Yeah, good luck compete with Jeff Bezos on that in the middle of a pandemic. That's what people want to do is bring their kids to a store and crowded aisles and stand online where they can just push a couple of buttons on their CCP-made iPhone

and have the toys sent directly to their house. And also great to do this right in the middle of a supply chain crisis where the toys aren't even coming anyway. So good luck to Toys R Us. Just stop trying to reboot these hits from the 90s. It's not going to work. Okay. Ghostbusters, the women didn't work. Bringing Back Roseanne worked for only a couple seconds. Fuller House didn't work. I'm sorry, Johnny. It just didn't work. Some things just need to die a graceful

death. Right off into the the sunset Toys R Us you're not going to compete with Amazon it's not happening and the timing couldn't be worse that's like when I got COVID and missed Joe Rogan on YouTube and ended up doing it on Spotify to a quarter of the audience the timing's off let me just say this Facebook you still got me shadow banned on Instagram so I want to take a shot back at you Facebook sucks Facebook feels like it's Rochester, New York

meaning it used to be hot and now it's just got empty skyscrapers and meth heads and fat old parents who root for the buffalo bills because that's the closest town and what i mean by that is instagram facebook you're done okay and and instagram you're about to be done you're buffalo okay people on uh you're done um but chris cuomo, Chris Cuomo is a good brother. Okay.

Chris Cuomo is a good brother. And Alec Baldwin has claimed that he did not pull the trigger of that gun. In an interview with George Stephanopoulos, he says, I didn't pull the trigger. Um, white supremacists did. Um, I don't mean to make light of the situation because I feel bad for Alec Baldwin I don't think he killed her because he wanted to

I think he killed her because she had some secret information about him that he needed to get away with her from I feel like there was a reason we don't know maybe she had some information about Hilar uh that alec baldwin was censored about maybe hilaria had mentioned um a running with the bulls that she did uh when she when she was saying she lived in barcelona for 20 years and you know the baldwin

family did not want it to come out that she was a white girl from a rich suburb a Jewish white girl from a rich suburb of Boston even though we already know it she's still trying to claim that she grew up in both places and maybe there was a story that she told somewhere on some media show when she was running around being a fake cook or fake yoga instructor whatever don't you love when these like when these uh the the arm candy of like very rich powerful men uh all of a sudden they become like these like like influencer yoga instructors yeah it's like we get it you're a fucking housewife who's paid for can anyone just be who you are you don't work for yourself and now you're showing up on

good day america with scarlet whatever her fucking name is and you're showing me how to stretch you're not indian you're not a real yogi you're a rich suburban white girl who doesn't know what to do with her time because alec baldwin pays the fucking bills you're not from spain you're not spanish you know how to pronounce american words and your puss puss is so good that there was a first AD on a film set that had a story about you not living in Barcelona when you said you did and Alec Baldwin had to kill her for you. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. This was a hit job.

And I'd be surprised if the CCP wasn't involved in some way. Why not? But Alec Baldwin claimed in his interview with George Stephanopoulos with his straight face that he did not point the gun at her and he didn't pull a trigger. He didn't pull a trigger. And so George Stephanopoulos says,

well, then how did the bullet fly out of the gun that you were holding? And he goes, he goes, why are you giving me such boomer energy right now why you gotta be a boomer georgie you gotta go you gotta get you gotta get you gotta get stefanopoulos why do you gotta be such a boomer okay is there any way we could pull that up even if it takes a second it's worth it because there's just a lot of things that don't add up about this story and it's very intriguing and um then he also he has to deal with george clooney george clooney saying to uh

releasing a statement george clooney fired some shots at him. George Clooney said, hey, anytime I'm handed a gun on set, I always check first to see, to make sure there's no live rounds in it. And George Stephanopoulos said,

what do you have to say about George Clooney's statement that he always checks when he's handed a gun to make sure there's no live rounds in it? And Alex Baldwin said, why you gotta be such a boomer about this dog?

I would say Alec Baldwin's having a rough month. Not to make light, of course, I know there's a family in mourning and I'm sorry about that. But I have to do my job. I know there's a family in mourning, and I'm sorry about that. But I have to do my job. As the king pig Tim Dillon himself says,

I got to do my job. And here we go. I was loved by everyone who worked with and liked by everyone who worked with and admired hold on am i supposed to believe that's a real cry or i always respected you as an actor you definitely were the most talented baldwin i'm saying it's real okay let's just assume but you know these actors they don't have personalities that's why they become actors because they don't even know who they are that's why he he married a woman who claimed to be from Spain and went around saying, Alec, quieres cachapas para bocadilla?

Oh, crazy. I'm going out there with the people. We're going. I'm from Spain. Hello. Let's go watch the Running of the Bulls. Oh, my God. I have to go to Barcelona.

I have to watch the best architecture. I love to live in America. Everything's great in America. My name is Hilaria, not Hillary. Not Hillary Weinberger. What was her real name? It was like Hillary Steinberger. Hillary Greenbaum.

Her parents are dentists from Boston. There's a lot of people that went to school with her. She was known to take Jewish holidays off, but when she grew up, she became, I like to live in America. Everything's good in America. I'm sorry, I got you all over the place. Her real name is Hillary Lynn Hayward Thomas.

Not Hilaria Rodriguez. Born on January 6th. Born on January 6th. So, of course, we know who's behind the Capitol riot. I'm telling you this all comes together in some way where Alec Baldwin had to do what he had to do to protect who was really behind the Capitol riots on the 6th. I think it was a little girl named Hilaria.

Okay. Let's watch the rest of this video after Alec Baldwin cries. I mean, even now, I find it hard to believe that. It just doesn't seem real to me. You haven't said much in public since that tragic accident.

Can I just say this? Alec Baldwin looks like shit. Now here's the two things that age you the most. Being president of the United States and accidentally killing a member of the crew. Roll it. You're going to age a little bit. I think the big question,

and the one you must have asked yourself a thousand times, how could this have happened? Here comes the good stuff. Just hang in there. One trillion shot, and the gun was in your hand. How do you come to terms with that? It wasn't in the script for the trigger to be pulled. Well, the trigger wasn't pulled. I didn't pull the trigger.

So you never pulled the trigger? No, no, no, no. I would never point a gun at anyone and pull the trigger. I would never. What did you think happened? Cut it a real bullet. What do you think happened? I thought she was sick. I thought she had bad sandwich.

Okay. Put a live bullet in a gun. A bullet that wasn't even supposed to be on the property. How do you respond to actors like George Clooney who say that every time they were handed a gun, they checked it themselves? Stop being a boomer, dog. So clearly, so right there on the surface,

you felt shock. You felt anger. You felt sadness. Do you feel guilt? You said you're not a victim. What a stupid, I'm sorry. I hate to go on, go in on a Greek hero.

But I mean, you feel sadness, you feel shock. Do you feel guilt? What do you think he's going to say? No, not at all. I feel pretty good about it, actually. I feel pretty good. I mean, can we, you know,

and I give him credit because he asked a few of the harder questions earlier but like talk about a lesbian softball game i mean if that is not a 30 mile per hour inferior arm throwing you a ball okay shout out to my lesbians i love you the marines of gentrification but let's be honest I'll fucking hit a homer off you every time with those fucking slow flabby arms that is a softball favor

did you feel guilty of course I did George of course I did um okay let's see the rest yeah yeah I did because I killed her back and i think of what could i have done

well i don't know if there's anything different you could have done because you apparently didn't point the gun and you didn't fire it so um obviously we're dealing with some sort of supernatural phenomenon that happened um because or you had a gun that doesn't require pointing and firing. We got a magic bullet on our hands here, fellas. We got what they call a magic bullet. My theory is Alec Baldwin put his arm down. Alec Baldwin put his arm down. The bullet, I feel like the bullet fired itself,

ricocheted off the ground, hit a cloud up above, came back down, hit into a mirror, came back, and hit the first AD, who tragically, we don't know her name. Because Alec Baldwin is the star of this tragedy. Which is why the media sucks. Because I don't even know the guy's name who died with Paul Walker.

All I know him as Paul Walker's plus one. All I know is if I was doing the list at heaven, like it was a club, and he walked up, I'd say, Jesus, we got Paul Walker plus one on the list. I don't even know the guy who died in the car with Ryan Dunn because the media never emphasizes those people because there's no

star power in their names. The real tragedy here is her, who she is. She died. Not if Alec Baldwin feels guilty. We know he feels guilty. But of course we're not going to do an interview with this dramatic music with her family or the girl who was supposed to run those guns. We're going to throw Alec Baldwin on there because the kid does a fucking Trump impression.

And he's an A-list star. What does the peanut gallery think? Alec Baldwin is a huge wanted fan. Bullet curved at hit her point blank. What does that mean? Do you know? Wanted, so the movie Wanted where you can curve the bullet with James McAvoy.

So the bullet curved. Charlie Stevens says, who picked the 80s drama music for that interview? Point the fake gun at the jurors and let them decide. Alec is innocent like Epstein. Free Willy. Somebody there is just an advocate for the innocent. Where was the shooter on the set?

No. That's a funny one. It deserves credit. He goes, where was the shooter on the set? No, that's a funny one. It deserves credit. Yeah. He goes, where was the shooter on the set? No grassy. No,

um, some goodies. Has anyone checked to see if she really Hollywood plays games? Don't they? Okay. That was a waste of a moment. That was what you call the waste of more. Uh,

Alec didn't really kill her. It was actually Lee Harvey Oswald from the book depository from Schizio. Yeah. What I want to know is where's the grassy knoll here? I need some ballistic experts to know where the shots were fired from. We need a Zapruder film. We got to figure this out because apparently he didn't point the gun

and he didn't fire the bullet. But the bullet did come from his gun that he was holding. So we have an old boomer misunderstanding here. We have what you call a boomer misunderstanding. This is the Bitcoin of murder stories. Hard to explain. hard to understand. Just know that somehow it works.

Anyway, there was a shooting at a middle school in Oxford, Michigan. Talk about an oxymoron of a city and state. Oxford, Michigan. Both those words conjure up opposite images. One, a bunch of beer drinking meth heads and the other one, snooty wasps reading Chaucer. But apparently there is a place called Oxford, Michigan and a couple kids got killed in a shooting. But you know what?

As my favorite meme that comes up on this on Twitter is, what's the dude's name? Atlanta, the show, very talented kid. Donald Glover. Donald Glover. The best meme for this that you see in all the comments is him dancing going, this is America. That's the best one.

That's all you can really say about this. It's not even really a news story. Most people don't even know about it. I think three to five kids were killed or whatever. The kid was 15. He's being tried as an adult. Next story, Dave Chappelle did a comedy special. Who cares?

This has been Long Days. And let's get to some small business sponsors. I want to give a shout out as always to my small business. Shout outs on Patreon. Patreon.com slash Yanni Long out as always to my small business. Shout outs on Patreon, patreon.com slash Yanni Longdays, man. Support small business. Gives world charm. It really does. I hate when I go somewhere, it's just all corporate chains, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Support these grinders like you support me. Our boy Nate Linder, you know the deal. He's a social media marketing wizard. natelinder.com will get your social media game

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All things social media go natelinder.com. Then, of course, zjamarealty.com. If you're looking for a spot in Brooklyn, hit these kids up. Any commercial or apartment rentals in Brooklyn, zjamarealty.com. Andrew Cuomo, secretary, still one of my favorite names. realty.com. Andrew Cuomo, secretary, still one of my favorite names. Grant Trower down in South Florida, granttrower.theatlanticrealtygroup.com. Phone number 954-591-6465. Follow him on the gram too at grant underscore trower for all your real estate needs. You're looking for an apartment in South Florida, okay? Trying to

tax evade a little bit, move down there, hit up Grant Trower. A lot of people moving down there, so you know who to hit up. Grant Trower, the Atlantic Realty Group. Chris Minetti, how you doing, guys? Phone number 215-750-3730. CallRIS. Get your check cashed with Minetti Financial Services. Okay? Old school, baby. Let's keep the IRS out of our fucking transactions. If you're in the South Philly area, Jersey, you know what to do. South Jersey, Philly area.

Then we got thebronxbrand.com, an incredible website, dog. I just bought something on there. You have to check it out. So many amazing artists on there. TheBronxBrand.com. Go buy yourself something. It's a revenue share with all the artists, and they showcase incredible artists from the Bronx,

the home of hip-hop. Please check out TheBronxBrand.com. Just take a peruse. Just check it out. Even if you don't buy anything, go. Check it out. Reese Ormond. What's the dollars, cat?

What you been up to, cat? Reese Ormond, as you know, is TechVera. TechVera.com for all your IT needs. Larger organizations with existing IT departments turn to TechVera for help with cloud projects and co-managed IT programs where we extend our best in class. TechVera, they do everything, cybercrime, cybersecurity. Hire TechVera if you have any of those concerns. You got a small business and you need an IT department, just hire TechVera.com. You get the deal, TechVera.com.

Eastside Cheesecakes, Julian Gregory. Eastsidecheesecakes.com is national. I got a ton. I got, I think, three pictures and DMs over Thanksgiving of people who ordered their cheesecakes from Eastside Cheesecakes and enjoyed them on Thanksgiving. Go check them out on the gram. It starts there. Eastside Cheesecakes on Instagram.

All one word. EastsideCheesecakes.com. And get yourself their delicious homemade from scratch cheesecakes and all the flavors they got. It's incredible. EastsideCheesecakes.com. Are they available at Uncle Paulie's in Los Angeles? I don't know at this point. Please update that, Julia or Gregory.

Please DM me and let me know if you're still at Uncle Paulie's. Or did Uncle Paulie's throw you out because of your politics? Now we got Aaron Leaf on there. For the free., all things music in Hawaii. You want to find out about local artists, bands in Hawaii, the music scene, shows coming up, go to ForTheFree.us. If you're going on vacation in Hawaii, you're a music fan or you want to become a music fan, you want to learn about new bands, check them out, dude. I mean, Bruno Mars is from Hawaii, okay? I'm sure ForTheFree's got a lot more independent bands, you know, but check them out dude i mean uh bruno mars is from hawaii okay i'm sure for the

free he's got a lot more independent bands you know but check them out for the free.us all things music in hawaii then exclusive auto shipping.com if you're moving your wheels anywhere go get a free quote from exclusive auto shipping.com with my boy Jared Z from the stink box, Tallahassee. All right. And I just want to say a goodbye to a very special small business shout out. We're going to say goodbye to Rob's mental playground. I will still support you. I will still talk about you, Rob, thank you for the great art that you put on your studio wall. Thank you for being such a great fan. I need you guys to always go support Rob at Rob's Mental Playground. Go have fun with him. Hopefully one

day we see you back. It's hard to get in though because your spot's already filled. Welcome David Hayes. Send me your copy. But Rob, we love you, bro. We all love you here. Thank you for being a part of the show. And we completely understand. And hope we brought awareness to your art and everything like that. Keep doing it. And please don't ever change your mustache.

Patreon.com slash Yanni Longdays. Need you guys to join up, man. Squeaky Clean is the bonus episode. People love it. It's where I really go off solo. So please join patreon.com slash yannilongdays for your bonus episode and other additional video content, et cetera. Five bucks a month.

Not a big deal. Welcome, John Divero. You sound like a director with that name. Julian, I'm not even going to try. Julian Lavi. Welcome. I see your email there, so I'll go with that name. Julien, I'm not even going to try. Julien Lavi, welcome. I see your email there, so I'll go with that. Alex Gamboa, welcome, guy. Then Ty S., Dana Hawthorne, sounds like an author.

Andrew, welcome. John Rodriguez, Kevin Hawkins, yeah, man. Sean McCain, Matt Youngblood, Matt John G. Blood, Scandinavian kid. Then we got David Hines and Em, who's an Eastern Hemi. Welcome, girl, or Mexican or something. I'm looking at your picture and your piece. It's been a long day.