Yannis Pappas Hour - Wawa Twins - H. Foley & Kevin Ryan

Episode Date: May 5, 2023

The Are You Garbage boys, H. Foley & Kevin Ryan come thru to talk Philly, Foley’s Size and how the boys met and started their hit podcast. Notice as the podcast goes on Foley’s seat gets pushe...d farther and farther down to the ground. You can zip thru it in fast forward and have a great laugh! See Yannis live Dates & Cities below All tickets: https://www.yannispappascomedy.comBoston July 8 Poughkeepsie, July 21-22Long Island Aug 17Salt Lake City aug 4-5Dallas Aug 24-26Springfield l, MO sept 7-9Calgary Sept 22–23FORTË Wayne, Indiana Sept 29-30Toronto Oct 7Red Bank, NJ Oct 14San Fran Oct 27-28New York Nov 4 Providence Nov 10-11Phoenix Nov 16-18Spokane Dec 1-2Tulsa Dec 8-9Louisville Dec 15-16Watch Yanni’s stand up special: https://youtu.be/ArlCFemEDvQJoin our highlights page for highlight clips of every episode: https://youtube.com/channel/UCfMy34qIYYy7XiRaHKO1ykwNew episodes every Friday and new bonus episodes every following Tuesday at Patreon.com/yannispappashourSponsors Factor meals https://www.factor75.comPromo code: fumes50 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Guys, before we get into this great episode with the RU Garbage Boys, my live dates, July 8th, the Wilbur Theater, Boston, Massachusetts. Laugh It Up just added Poughkeepsie, New York, July 21st and 22nd. Then we got the Paramount Theater in Huntington, Long Island, August 17th. Dallas, Texas, August 24th and 25th. Springfield, Missouri, weekend of September 7th through 9th. Calgary, Alberta, September 22nd, 23rd. Fort Wayne, Indiana, September 29th and 30th. Toronto, Ontario, the T-Dot, October 7th, Royal Theater.
Starting point is 00:00:39 Red Bank, New Jersey, the Vogel Theater, October 14th. Cobbs, San Francisco, now October 27th and 28th. Now on sale, Sony Hall, November 4th in New York City. Providence, Rhode Island, November 10th and 11th. Phoenix, Arizona, November 16th and 17th. Spokane, Washington, December 1st. Tulsa, Oklahoma, December 8th and 9th. Louisville, December 15th and 16th.
Starting point is 00:01:02 New dates also being added right now. Patreon.com slash Giannis Papasour for our bonus episodes. Please join. Check out our bonus apps every single week. Welcome to the Fediverse. Now enjoy this episode with my two favorite guys, the Wawa twins, Foley and Ryan. What's up, everybody? Propaganda Get his kids screwed in Got a lot to say Aw, shit It's about to be a long day It's a long day
Starting point is 00:01:46 It's a long day What's up, everybody? Obviously, I'm here with the RU Garbage Kids, otherwise known as the Wawa Twins. Hoagie Fest coming up this summer. Get yourself a shorty. Kippy and Foley. What up, dog?
Starting point is 00:01:59 Hey, buddy. What's going on? This is great. What you can do, we switch seats. What you can do is maybe take one of those, carry one of those onto a plane. Maybe if you got an inflatable one. Sure.
Starting point is 00:02:09 And tuck it. Just post up. Because you're comfortable. I'm comfortable right now, yeah. I'm comfortable on the plane when we fly for business because we're up front. Yeah, especially if you can get nine bloodies in you. Yeah, yeah. Ken likes a BM on the plane.
Starting point is 00:02:20 I do. He goes after it. That and my movies, I'm in. And he gets real finicky if she don't give him to him quick enough. He gets real snappy with me, too.
Starting point is 00:02:29 He's like, what's this fucking broads deal? I didn't know that was a rule. You only got one before you took off. Well, you know what? Maybe it wasn't a rule and they just 86'd you
Starting point is 00:02:37 without you knowing about it. They flagged you before you got on the tarmac. That's fucking bullshit. I'm up front. Let's go. Keep them coming. No one will sting you with that snack card sometimes.
Starting point is 00:02:47 Fucking vegan gummy bears. Let's go. How many did you get before it took off? They only give you one. But no, you were drinking them in the bar beforehand. Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, I had a couple. Oh, you pre-gamed the flight.
Starting point is 00:03:01 Of course. Yeah. If we don't have shows that night, yeah, we'll have two tree pops. Yeah, yeah. You'll have two tree pops. Yeah, yeah. You'll have two tree. I'll have two tree. He'll have 18, 19.
Starting point is 00:03:11 Get loosened up. Get ready to go. Then I get on the plane. I have one. I put my movie on. Well, it's also like he gets mad at me. He's like, you're not fucking drinking, dude. I'm like, we got to land. I got to go to Avis and get a car.
Starting point is 00:03:21 They're not going to hand me keys to a Tahoe when I'm slurring my words. Do you start earlier? Like a, like, you know, like a, in a race, if a guy was racing a girl,
Starting point is 00:03:30 you kind of give her a headstart. Like if you guys are drinking together, do you start earlier? So then you can be even when you're on your seventies on his first. I have this thing where I have, if I'm drinking, I have to cry. What I call it.
Starting point is 00:03:41 I have to cross the river. So I can't just have a drink and then relax. I got to get two or three in me to get out of the atmosphere. And then I can start relaxing. Then I can chill with everybody. But I got to get across. I got to get the boat man, get across the river, get the quarters on my ass. And why is that?
Starting point is 00:03:58 Because you just feel surly if you don't? It's just the way alcohol hits me. If I have one drink, if I have one IPA. It's like a trank dart. Yeah, I feel like I just had way alcohol hits me. If I have one drink, if I have one IPA. It's like a trank dart. Yeah, I feel like I just had chemo. Right. Like I'm just in this weird hazy thing.
Starting point is 00:04:12 I got to fucking, I got to get in there. I got to get it in the bloodstream. Right, right, right. Yeah. Yeah. You look, I mean, you're a bigger guy. Sure. A little bit of a bigger guy.
Starting point is 00:04:20 Statistically. So one beer. Well, statistically, we're obese. Oh, yeah. No, I'm a fat piece of shit. Oh, no. Yeah, statistically, we're obese. Oh, yeah. No, I'm a fat piece of shit. Oh, no. Yeah, dude. You're obese.
Starting point is 00:04:30 You're probably overweight. No, no, no. They call you obese in the hospital hurt my feelings. That was like the quack. That's how they call me into the doctor's office. When I had COVID and I saw the report, like that was the worst part about having COVID was like they called me obese. I was like, can we use a different terminology? Dude, I had every single pre-existing condition for that,
Starting point is 00:04:47 and I fucking rolled through COVID. Never got it once. There's a couple guys like you that, you know, that should be gone. Dude, he was in Queens. They were stacking bodies out front of his house, literally bodies on the street, and he's out there smoking cigs, fucking hanging out. They had the tractor trailer at the hospital near my apartment.
Starting point is 00:05:08 I'm like, well, I guess that's where I'll be. Honey, if you need me, I'll be over at the hospital. Save me a room in that, will you? It motivated Action Bronson, I think, to get in shape. That guy, he's the hero. Everybody's crazy. Was there a moment where you were like, alright, let me stay here or you were just like, no, I'm a guy from Philly
Starting point is 00:05:27 and give me a hoagie. I was just dodging. I was careful. I did my mask, all that kind of shit. Wiped all the stuff down. But no, the beginning, when it was the worst, I was probably eating the worst of my life. It's tough. Dude, we were off. We had money coming in.
Starting point is 00:05:43 You were living at home, too. Crushing frozen pizzas. Yeah, that's tough. Your guys we were off. We had money coming in. Fucking, dude, I was crushing frozen. You were living at home, too. Yeah, crushing frozen pizzas. Yeah, that's tough. Your guys' podcast is taking off. Sure. You got some money rolling in, then COVID hits. It's asking, COVID's saying, hey, nobody can party, and you guys, like, we want, this is what we want to start partying.
Starting point is 00:05:57 Well, we hit in COVID. Yeah. We were, I mean, we launched the pod two weeks before COVID. Was it that early? It was that, dude. It was, we launched like February 14th or 18th or something like that.
Starting point is 00:06:07 So we only had two EPS and then we had two in the can and I was like, well, here's another failed fucking project. You know what I mean? You lost it. You, you,
Starting point is 00:06:15 when you launched it, it almost looks like you were in on COVID. Yeah, like you were like, let's start a podcast because we know what's coming. I paid some Chinese diplomats.
Starting point is 00:06:21 People are going to be indoors. Find out Fauci's my uncle. We got a little insider training tip. He dipped out of town real quick and went to Wildwood, New Jersey. Shout out to it, baby. I stayed in the bunker in Astoria with my girl for the first two months. We started crushing pods. We did hard feelings every day for a half an hour,
Starting point is 00:06:43 and we did two episodes of Are You Garbage? And we were able to get, you know, bigger people because they were chilling, doing much. And, dude, me and my girl were just inside going to the grocery store, going to the wine store, getting, like, $400 orders and just fucking... Yeah. I remember...
Starting point is 00:07:00 Then we went down to my mom's, and that was a wrap. That's when it really kicked in. I remember one time he was like, yeah, everybody's doing keto. He was at his he was like, yeah, everybody's doing keto. He was at his mom's. He goes, everybody's doing keto. And I'm like, all right. And then like two days later, he's like, yeah, you know, you're allowed to have beers on keto.
Starting point is 00:07:12 And I'm like, I don't think so, man. He's like, yeah, you say you're allowed four beers. I go, dude, I got to talk to this nutritionist. Nick Loeb Ultras. That's what he's going to do. Nick Ultras. That's funny. He's just reading the keto book, and his brain just won't accept those sentences That say you can't have beer
Starting point is 00:07:25 Like I didn't see it But as fucked up as COVID was Obviously it was bad But those The whole thing's a hoax The two months that I was The two or three months It's a hoax
Starting point is 00:07:35 It's a hoax It's a hoax It's a hoax It's all bullshit But the two or three months I was down at my parents That's honestly was the happiest Because my dad Yeah no responsibility Not paying rent And your mom's doing your laundry Bullshit. But the two or three months I was down at my parents, that honestly was the happiest. Yeah, no responsibility, not paying rent, and your mom's doing your laundry.
Starting point is 00:07:50 Yeah, it was all right. I mean, what other 45-year-old doesn't want to live like that? No, but here's the deal. Here's the deal. I know why it felt so good. My dad had just started getting sick, so it was good to have that time with him. Oh, okay. Well, you made it serious right before I was about to make a joke. Yeah, I put it in pause.
Starting point is 00:08:06 You realize this back was against the ropes? It was like, let me throw the sympathy card out of here. I start crying. Because I was about to say, you guys started Are You Garbage? You kind of knew. When you start something that's got the right chemistry and it's got the feel, you kind of know it's going to work out. So when you went home probably with your folks, you knew you had something. Whereas if you didn't have Are You Garbage? and you didn't have that instinct it's going to work out. So when you went home, probably with your folks, you knew you had something.
Starting point is 00:08:25 Whereas if you didn't have RU Garbage and you didn't have that instinct it was going to work out, you'd just be going back home to your folks. Yeah, you're going home. You're not doing a victory lap. You're a loser, Bill. You're going right back to loser, Bill. I would have been okay with that, to be honest with you, man.
Starting point is 00:08:39 If I could, if it was socially acceptable, I would definitely move home and live with my mom. You love your folks. Yeah, they're good peeps. Okay, so what's the emotional eating about then? What's the emotional eating? Because I'm an emotional eater. I eat emotionally.
Starting point is 00:08:53 I blow up to about 225. That's what I'm walking around at right now, about 230. 230. That's obese. Hey, I didn't come here to be made fun of on camera, Yanni. Got me out of here in fucking Bay Ridge. Let me tell you something. No disrespect, but if Foley wasn't here, we'd be two fat guys talking to each other.
Starting point is 00:09:10 You are not a fat guy. What are you talking about? Are you kidding me? No, you're my... Yanni. I'm a fat guy. No, I mean... Then what am I?
Starting point is 00:09:18 Obese. Obese. Obese. Obese. I mean, yeah. And we're obese. Here it is. We're European fat. You're American fat. Okay. Yeah. That's more Here it is. We're European fat.
Starting point is 00:09:26 You're American fat. Okay. Yeah. That's more of it. We're also city fat. You go out to Missouri. I'm a fucking nine and a half out there, baby. That's wheelchair fat.
Starting point is 00:09:35 I remember saying on stage, I'm like, yeah, I'm a fat guy. It was when I first started doing the road like a few years ago. And I was like, yeah, I'm a fat guy. And someone's like, the headliner was like, you're not a fat guy out here, dude. He's like, you're the hottest chick in Springfield. What are you talking about? Maybe New York you're fucking chubby, but not out here, man. Yeah, most of the country you drive to the buffet, and by drive I mean all the way up to the buffet from car to scooter.
Starting point is 00:09:58 Sure. Yeah, car to scooter, you scoot right up. Yeah, you never get out of a mechanical vehicle. You're on wheels the whole time. You're always on wheels, yeah. The emotional eating, I don't know. Food was always big in our house. We ate a lot.
Starting point is 00:10:12 I don't really know where it comes from. Are you Italian, Foley? Irish. Irish. Yeah, I don't know where it comes from, but it's definitely there. I'm definitely an emotional eater. Yeah. Definitely for comfort and all that stuff.
Starting point is 00:10:22 Usually the Irish go liquid lunch. Right here. Yeah. Ding, ding, ding. My whole, dude here No one's really that fat in my family But it's like we will get drunk and tell you how we feel Which is the only time Irish people talk about their feelings I need about 8 in me Especially now because they're all still in Philly
Starting point is 00:10:38 And I'll come home and I'll get like 8 in me What's this guy's fucking deal Oh shit here we go Me and my dad were the only ones that were big in my family My brother's thin and my mom's thin But I have a lot of my dad's qualities Yeah, and genes too Some of it's genetic
Starting point is 00:10:53 He used to graze the way that I graze Oh, you graze Oh, yeah Especially there at the house After dinner, milling around We would take rotations Where he would be in the kitchen for a couple of minutes. I'd be looking the other
Starting point is 00:11:08 way and then I'd go in there and be doing the same thing. We'd both give each other shit. What are you doing in there? Get out of there. How do animals stay so thin? They eat all day. I don't know. Because they're eating grass. They're running for their life, Yanni. What the fuck? There's someone after them. This fat idiot's sitting in his house.
Starting point is 00:11:24 He's got his mom doing his laundry. But even the ones that are like fenced off, they just eat all day. But it's just because they're not eating Taco Bell. Not eating Taco Bell.
Starting point is 00:11:32 They're eating fucking grass and seeds. Now listen. Do you ever see when like a bear lives near like a dump? When they eat processed food and stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:11:41 They just blow up? Blow up. Morbidly obese. Just for eating a beer, a bear eating a Slurpee. You kind of eat a Slurpee, right? It's not really a drink. It's more of an eating a Slurpee.
Starting point is 00:11:52 I would say that, yes. It takes a little bit of, yeah, you eat ice cream. Yeah. You eat water ice. Yeah. You don't drink water ice. Yeah, you see, that's the thing.
Starting point is 00:11:59 Like, what is eating, because with ice cream, nobody says you lick it, nobody goes, you lick it. You want to go lick a cone? Do you want to go eat ice cream? Eat ice cream, yeah. But you don't really eat it. No. It melts in your mouth. The first time I heard
Starting point is 00:12:09 the morbidly obese thing was a couple years ago at the pulmonologist. He said it real slick, too, under his breath. I was like, what the fuck did you say? Because he was talking to the nurse, and he was looking at me, and he was like a 45-year-old man, morbidly obese, and I was like, what the fuck did you say? He's talking into a recorder.
Starting point is 00:12:26 I'm looking around. Hey, you got a couple of fatties in here, doc. Anyway, about that Ozem. It's a tough thing, too, because part of it is very jovial. Sure. You feel like people, and it's one of those things people just make jokes about all the time. And we always did that. I was always called fat my whole life, like, you know, in like a busting balls kind of
Starting point is 00:12:47 way. You know, we did it. For years in our relationship, I was the fat one. Yeah. Yeah. I would walk up and he'd go, what's up, fat? I was, I mean, he was probably, when I met you in Philly, you were probably my size now. What are you weight now?
Starting point is 00:12:59 I'm like 230 probably. Yeah, that would make sense. So he was like, he was walking around. When I met him, he was walking around with me and I was probably like 250, 255. Oh, that's big. Yeah. He was a big boy. Yeah. Yeah, that would make sense. So he was like he was walking around. When I met him, he was walking around with me and I was probably like 250 255. Oh, that's big. Yeah, the big boy. Yeah. Yeah. And he would walk. He would call. What's up, fatty? Like every time I walked out. Hey, how you doing, fatty?
Starting point is 00:13:13 Yeah. And then it's, you know, we've lost weight and I got all of his old clothes. That's when we were real poor in New York, dude. You know you're jammed up money wise when your fat friend loses 25 pounds and you take his nine dollar pants. I was walking around New York, dude. You know you're jammed up money-wise when your fat friend loses 25 pounds and you take his $9 pants. I was walking around New York in 2014
Starting point is 00:13:29 wearing 2008 Philly style. Yeah. Cromby and Finch. Structural jersey on a chair. When your friend, me and Bobby Kelly were talking about this. I made a joke. I said, He looks like fucking He-Man.
Starting point is 00:13:44 Yeah, when he got the surgery. I know. The picture of, he looked, we had him on the pod, I think, a few months after he had the surgery. He came and he looked good, but he was kind of like in that little bit of a transitional period. There's a picture from Moon Tower. They all go to this taco place.
Starting point is 00:14:01 What's it called? I don't know. Soder sets it up. I forget what it's called. El Campanitos or something. He's out front in this picture fucking cock diesel. Just looks fucking unbelievable. Yeah, yeah. Fucking hot Bobby.
Starting point is 00:14:12 Yeah, I mean, listen. You know, science can do stuff. I know. Crazy. They can change your gender and they can get you skinny. He really worked hard. We talked about it for a while after we recorded. He he's like it.
Starting point is 00:14:27 It wasn't just like, you know, OK, I want to do what I'm going to do. He had to, like, fucking work on himself for like a year. Yes. You got to eat. You can't just get a lot of mental and emotional work, too, because they say, like, it's like addicts. It's like if you don't solve the problem, a lot of guys that do it end up either just eating through it.
Starting point is 00:14:42 Yeah. Or like go back to drinking and smoking and shit like that because you haven't fixed that thing in your brain. You're trying to physically change it of like, okay, now I can't eat that much, but then you're smoking meth two weeks later. Yeah. But there's nothing wrong with that.
Starting point is 00:14:55 Yeah. So do you think ever about maybe throwing a band on? I'm going to. I have a cardiologist appointment in June that I'm going to, and I'm going to ask him about the Ozempic. Oh, yeah! Yeah. Just to see what he says.
Starting point is 00:15:11 Yeah, yeah. I mean, I've said this, I think If not, I'm going down to Mexico getting what I need. What do they got down there? Coke. I could do a bender in Tijuana. Getting back on the horse with your nuts. It's funny that that drug is in low supply. Because of all the Hollywood elites.
Starting point is 00:15:27 Yeah. I looked into it because I'm like, hey, man. I feel like I'm at a point where I'm like, if I don't get this 20-30 off, I could easily go the other way. Yeah. So I'm like, let me see if I can get this 20-30 off. So I looked into a Zempik, but somebody was like, yeah, they're not going to give it to you. It would be good if there was a way to work out once, and then you get it off. But the thing is, you've got to do it every day.
Starting point is 00:15:47 I know. That's what happens to me. I get into this like three days, and I'm like, all right. What are you doing? Are you hitting a gym? Are you doing it at the house? What are you doing? I do the elliptical, man.
Starting point is 00:15:53 No pressure on the knees. Yeah, that's good. It's the old lady workout. You got the elliptical at the house? I don't have one at the house yet. Where are you going to? I go to the gym. Right now, I go to, what is it, Planet Fitness.
Starting point is 00:16:03 20 bucks a month. Up there? I mean, whoever interiorly designed that place, what is it, Planet Fitness. 20 bucks a month. Up there? I mean, whoever interiorly designed that place, it looks like a car wash. Oh, yeah. I've always said that's the only place you can see a guy on steroids and a guy running in jeans on the treadmill. That's the only guy fucking both ends of the spectrum. But in the burbs, they're nice. They're decent.
Starting point is 00:16:17 They're nicer in the burbs. They still look like car washes. You go to one in the city, it's wild. No steam room, but they do have the massage chair that you can get in for 10 minutes if you're an elite member, black card member. It's funny. Are you a black card? Are you a black card member?
Starting point is 00:16:31 It's 25 bucks. It's 25 bucks. It's like ordering dinner for yourself one night a month. So I'm a member of another gym, and I just joined Planet Fitness because that's where Verzi goes. Now we can go together. There you go.
Starting point is 00:16:43 Verzi walks on the treadmill. Really? Yeah. He's got bad knees or There you go. Verzi walks on the treadmill. Really? Yeah. He's got bad knees or something? No. I think he's just like. He's out for a stroll. He strolls in place.
Starting point is 00:16:53 And then he'll be like. What's the rush? What are you doing? He's like, I had a great workout yesterday. Then I went to the gym with him and he was walking on the treadmill. I even saw a video of you running on the treadmill. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:04 Yeah. Yeah. That was when I was. That's when I was like full blast. That was after being like full blast with the trainer for a while. And shortly after that, I fell off the horse. You know what's also tough probably why you can't lose weight? Why? Because you look good big.
Starting point is 00:17:17 You're a handsome guy. He's got a good head of hair. He's a good looking dude. Good looking dude. He carries it pretty well. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, no grays, like fucking solid.
Starting point is 00:17:25 You could look good. Nah, it's just I'm weak. That's what it is. What do you mean? I'm a weak man. I'm a weak, as far as discipline. If I was more disciplined. That's what makes you funny.
Starting point is 00:17:34 True. If you were disciplined, you know. There's a lot of guys now who treat like comedy like mathematics. Uh-huh. Like work hard. I hate that thing. Like work hard. It's like, huh?
Starting point is 00:17:44 I'm terrible with that stuff. You know that whole thing? Like work hard. I hate that thing, like work hard. It's like, huh? I'm terrible with that stuff. You know that whole thing, like work hard. I hate those people who give motivational speeches about comedy. Grind. It's grind time, baby.
Starting point is 00:17:53 Yeah, I got into this because I had a natural talent to be a goof off. I like to start my day at 2 p.m. And not listen to sets. I didn't go to fucking Harvard. I barely made it
Starting point is 00:18:02 out of my liberal arts college. Where'd you go again? American University. That's right. That's right. That's down in D.C. That's a good school. It's a good school. But when I went to it, it was right after there was a big scandal. That's right. I think we talked about it.
Starting point is 00:18:15 We talked about it on our show. What's the Hamptons of Philly? The nice part of Avalon, New Jersey. Avalon and Stone Harbor. Because there is a local Philly. Here's the deal about Philly. Go ahead. the nice part of... Avalon, New Jersey. Avalon, New Jersey. Avalon and Stone Harbor. Because, like, there is, like, a local Philly...
Starting point is 00:18:27 Here's the deal about Philly. Go ahead. I know a couple... There's money down there. There's money down there. There's a lot of money in the birds. The main line.
Starting point is 00:18:33 Main line. Main line is where you live, like, all year. Like, that would be... You live in the real nice areas of the main line. Right. That's old school Philly money.
Starting point is 00:18:40 That's old money. That's, like, real old money. Chestnut Hills, old school Philly money. That's where, like, white people live and where Kobe played basketball. Yes.
Starting point is 00:18:45 He was off the main line. Lower Marion, Villanova, that's all main line. That's a real ritzy area. That's where billionaires live out there. We used to play them in lacrosse. And big thing with lacrosse is you have to start it young. But if it's not that rich of an area, they don't start young. You start when you're in like eighth and ninth grade.
Starting point is 00:19:03 Is lacrosse in a not rich area? Not super. It started to get to. In the late 80s, early 90s, middle class areas started to pick it up because it was cool. But out in the main line, they started at like three years old. Yeah. My question. They would fucking smoke us. Is there a non-white lacrosse player?
Starting point is 00:19:22 It's almost like. I'm sure there is. Jim Brown was a great lacrosse player. I think it's like there's no white hibachi chefs. Well, it's like you're mad if LeBron decided to play soccer. What if you're white and you want to become a hibachi chef? A couple of kids at Benihana doing all right. What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:19:34 Carl, you're up. No, I think that's completely different. I think it's multi-national or whatever. What's the word? Yeah, everybody plays. It's in the neighborhood. People know what you's the word? Yeah, everybody plays. It's in the neighborhood. People know what you're talking about. Yeah, everybody plays.
Starting point is 00:19:47 That makes sense. But it is a rich guy's sport. Jim Brown was a great lacrosse player. Jim Brown's right. He played lacrosse. Yeah. Did he go to Syracuse? He grew up in Long Island.
Starting point is 00:19:55 I know that. Long Island. Yeah. Yeah, Manhasset. Yeah. So the main line is really the hand- The main line is like the rich people. But then they all summer, usually, in like Avalon or Stone Harbor.
Starting point is 00:20:06 They got houses down there. Stone Harbor. Stone Harbor. South Jersey. South Jersey, Stone Harbor. That's where Taylor Swift started playing. Yeah, she's from Reading, PA. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:13 Yeah. She's from Reading, PA. She's all right, man. Reading, PA's got an interesting history. I don't know anything about it. I mean, that might as well have been in fucking, that might, you going to East Jaipur to us, go to Reading, Pennsylvania. Yeah, right.
Starting point is 00:20:24 So that's not like. That was like two hours away. Maybe like a flea market or Christmas shopping or something like that. Hit the outlets. Where is that Game of Thrones wall for the Philly area? Where is it when you go one block
Starting point is 00:20:40 there, you don't hear whom anymore? It's tough because the suburbs... Dude, it goes down to Delaware. The suburbs have the worst accent. My little nieces and nephews, I go home and they're like, Mom, can I have a cake? And I'm like, you're such a sweet little girl. Stop talking like that.
Starting point is 00:20:56 Yeah, it's crazy. The suburbs have it bad, too. Yeah, it's a good point. It goes all the way down to Delaware, some parts of Maryland, Baltimore, Baltimore. It's that mid-Atlantic. You have the same dirtbag accent. South Jersey, too. It kind of spread a little south and west like COVID. But the money's...
Starting point is 00:21:10 Yeah. It's like Vietnam. There's no actual demilitarized zone. It's all mixed in. Like, around where I grew up, I grew up in a middle-class neighborhood, but all around us are pockets of obscene wealth. Right. Like city block mansions.
Starting point is 00:21:25 Right. Like the guy that used to own U.S. healthcare, all these huge mansions that were all over the place. We used to drive by them around Christmas and look at them. Just drink a beer, look at Adam. Little dirt balls on the back seat. Like a movie scene. Steal a reindeer.
Starting point is 00:21:37 Imagine if we lived there. One day this will be my home. If you were a car, you can get a him like this. Now go get your Ozempic. Once I get out of the Ozempic, I'll have a place like this to myself. I remember when you guys started Are You Garbage? And I was a big get. You were.
Starting point is 00:21:58 That's like, wow. I remember when I was a big get. Yeah. You're still a big get. Now I don't return your phone calls. I'm a big get in your heart, but I'm not a big get career-wise. No. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:07 You have also one of our favorite episodes. The one episode, I think it was your second. Yeah. That was an all-time. I don't know if you remember. I think it was your second. Well, you called us the Wawa twins for the first time. That was the second one.
Starting point is 00:22:17 Yeah. And that was like head hurt. That's got the least numbers of the three. Really? Yeah. We got to get you back. What are you doing? I'm due for a four-peat.
Starting point is 00:22:23 I'm not getting back in here. I'm not getting back in a dude-y Manhattan condo. Hey, that's somewhere in South Pennsylvania. Yeah, it's down there in Bryn Mawr. No, Bryn Mawr's too rich for that. Bryn Mawr's too rich. Sorry about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:37 We're in Northeast Philly somewhere off Common Avenue. You're down there in Cherry Hill. Right by Ticone. Shut up. The Ticone-Palmyra Bridge. That was always the shitty bridge. Now, here's the deal. I went to Angelo's when I was in Philly.
Starting point is 00:22:51 I saw that. Yeah, I went to Angelo's. What is Angelo's? That's the pizza and the Philly cheesesteaks. Was it famous? If you guys don't know it, was it famous in Philly? Is that the place on South Street with the big slices that burn down? No, that's the...
Starting point is 00:23:03 Fuck is the big place. Probably Antonio's or Margarito's. Yeah, and O'Malley's, I'll tell you that. Or Santichi's. But Angelo's is like it's. Where's Angelo? I don't know it. It's like off, it's in Little Italy.
Starting point is 00:23:16 It's in Little Italy. Me and Jared went there. Is it newer? No, it's been around. It's a fucking hole in the wall. Angelo's Pizzeria, but suppose they got the best cheese steaks, but you got to wait like four hours and eat them in the freezing cold. Yeah, nobody's doing that.
Starting point is 00:23:32 Santucci, shout out to Santucci. Yeah, Santucci's. They make an R.A. pie, original square pie in Roxbury. Yeah. Pizza John. Which I really transitioned over to. I've been out for 10 years. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:42 These weren't there. Tacanelli's is great. That's originally in Port Richmond, I believe. Shout for 10 years. Yeah. These weren't there. Taccanelli's is great. That's originally in Port Richmond, I believe. Shout out to it. You've been out of there for 10 years. 10 years, dude. I'm a New York liberal compared to if you talk to my uncle. Yeah, it's really.
Starting point is 00:23:55 There'll be a Thanksgiving or something. I'll be walking by to get a drink. Like, this guy is a fucking New York Democrat. I'm like, what the fuck? Drinking Heinekens over here. Yeah. Well, there's levels, right? There's those neighborhoods
Starting point is 00:24:06 where it's American flags and then those neighborhoods where there's Trump flags. Yeah. The Trump flag is like, there's a few around by me and they put them on high. Don't drive by my mom's house.
Starting point is 00:24:15 They put them on high poles. She got a Trump flag? They were donors. Oh, no, dude, my mom-in-law hung a Trump flag in her bedroom window facing her. Holy shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah-law hung a Trump flag in her bedroom window facing her. Holy shit.
Starting point is 00:24:26 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really? Facing her in her bedroom just so she could see it. Whoa. She's got Trump magnets on the fridge. Jesus. She's got a Trump salt and pepper shaker. And guess what?
Starting point is 00:24:39 Her dog has a Trump water bowl. Jesus. That's unnecessary. That guy moves merch, though, dude. He does. He's got salt and pepper stickers and water bowls. Didn't he just drop a card game or something like that? Dude, he's got NFTs.
Starting point is 00:24:51 Crazy. He's got superhero NFTs. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to get into. Yeah, yeah. Head accessories. He moves tickies, I'll tell you that. Well, you know, his fans are either, like, really rich and classy or just kind of, like, the other extreme?
Starting point is 00:25:06 Sure. Yeah. Yeah. You know? They're poor. Yeah, kind of. It's sort of like extremes, right? It's either rags or riches with the Republican Party. It'll be interesting to see what happens this election.
Starting point is 00:25:16 Yeah. Who are you guys voting for? I don't vote because I don't want... I don't want to... I'm so bad I could do that. It's so hard to do that. I don't want to have to do jury duty. I only got to end up on a murder trial.
Starting point is 00:25:29 I got fucking road dates. I got a plug. That's a great way. That's so you avoid it because if you vote, they got you on the books for jury duty. When I was six, I think it was like that. It was George Bush versus Clinton or whatever. And I was like, who are you voting for, dude? And he was like, I don't vote.
Starting point is 00:25:42 I don't want to do jury duty. And I was like, my man, that's what I'm doing. That was passed down to you. That could have been passed down from his father to him to you. It's just like your family may have never served the community at all. Well, my mom, well, my dad, yeah, no. My dad, no. My mom, she was going to come up to New York.
Starting point is 00:26:02 She's like, I can't. I got to go down to the city for jury duty. She had to go sit down there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did it once when I hated my job. I thought it was like a great way to come up to New York. She's like, I can't. I got to go down to the city for jury duty. She had to go sit down there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did it once when I hated my job. I thought it was a great way to not go to work. And I was right. Because you get paid, too.
Starting point is 00:26:11 You get paid like 80 bucks a day or something. And also, you get paid at your job, I guess. They can't not pay you. I had it once in New York when I lived here the first time. And we were down in the, what was it, by the Brooklyn Bridge. Yeah. Like we're city hall. Downtown Brooklyn, yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:24 Yeah, it was nice. Yeah. But I didn't get selected. It was a juicy case, too. I, by like the Brooklyn Bridge. Yeah. Like where City Hall. Downtown Brooklyn, yeah. Yeah, it was nice. Yeah. And, but I didn't get selected. It was a juicy case still. I can't remember what it was. Some murder or something like that. Yeah. I don't want to do, dude, I already got bad anxiety.
Starting point is 00:26:34 I can't be laying down a night thing. I'm about to fucking smoke it, dude. Yeah, I got, I helped put a guy, I mean, with this guy, it was drunk driving too. Really? Nothing, nobody was hurt, but it was just like his third. We put him away. Put him away. Put him away, Johnny. Put him away, yeah. Really? Nobody was hurt, but it was just like his third. We put him away. Put him away. Put him away, yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:46 How long did you deliberate for? I think we deliberate. Get a couple free lunches out of it? Yeah. I'm still on the fence over here. A filet mignon might sway me one way or the other. Yeah, we're still deliberating. Where's that pamphlet again for takeout?
Starting point is 00:27:01 Yeah, he's flip-flopping for a burrito bowl. We're just sitting there looking through the pamphlets they give you for takeout because you get takeout. That ain't bad. I don't want to do that. They didn't put a stuff. I think they put you up unless it's a case that they don't want you talking to the media. Meander? No. What is it?
Starting point is 00:27:17 Sequester. I'd be talking to the media. One of those alert-out faces. I'd be tweeting, I knew the guy was guilty. I think unless you're on the OJ trial, you can sleep at home. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:29 Unless it's like of national importance or something. I only voted once in 2008. I voted for Obama. You did, huh? I did vote for Obama that year.
Starting point is 00:27:36 Yeah. I was in college, yeah. Yeah. I was in Philly and I've been ducking him ever since. Trying to get me. I never knew,
Starting point is 00:27:42 I hadn't voted before. I didn't know you had to pick a whole bunch of shit. I thought it was you walk in one and done. Yeah, you got it. There to get me. I never knew. I didn't, I never, I hadn't voted before. I didn't know you had to pick a whole bunch of shit. I thought it was you walk in one and done. Yeah, you got it. There's a gun.
Starting point is 00:27:49 They were yelling at me. They're like, vote for, don't remember, don't forget. So no eating in the booth. Yeah. There's a whole undercard.
Starting point is 00:27:55 It's like a whole, there's a whole undercard of like, like when you watch a UFC fight, you're like, who are all these guys? And you just pick one. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:01 You're like, I don't know these guys. Yeah. I'm not getting there for the opening band. Yeah. What are you talking about? I'm here to watch the Brazilian guy versus Adesanya. I don't know these guys. Yeah, I'm not getting there for the opening band. What are you talking about? I'm here to watch the Brazilian guy versus Adesanya.
Starting point is 00:28:07 I don't know these other guys. There's a whole fucking city council. It's funny that those guys end up serving and are very important. They're more important. They're more important. That's how they all sneak in there. Nobody knows who they are and what they do.
Starting point is 00:28:17 Yeah, they all sneak in there. How do you fucking vote for a city councilman? Like a comptroller or something. Yeah, or a comptroller or like a- In a small town in the suburbs. Yeah, district attorney. They're all shifty as shit. Yeah, or a comptroller or like a... In a small town in the suburbs, yeah. District attorney. They're all shifty as shit. Yeah, and you don't know, you just pick a name. You just go by party
Starting point is 00:28:30 usually. Yeah, by party. Yeah. Total line. Yeah. It's really, we gotta change the system. Something. Yeah. You heard it here first, folks. You heard it here first. Yanni's changing the system. Would you ever run for office? Would I ever? Up there? You think you could pull it off up there? You and Lurzy?
Starting point is 00:28:46 Yeah, you and Lurzy. Do a straw man campaign or something? Take over the whole town. I'm not one of those guys, though. I don't want the power. I don't want the responsibility. Oh, no. I don't want any of those. A couple of no-show contracts for the boys.
Starting point is 00:28:55 What are you talking about? Yeah, go up there. See, this is technically a co-op, and I get emails all the time for the meetings, and I don't even respond to those. So you could be running this joint. Yeah, but that's not for people like me. That's not for us. Absolute power corrupts, absolutely. Yeah! I can't be
Starting point is 00:29:09 in charge of the window, Renno. It's not for, it's for like hall monitor types. Yeah. You know? It's like for a woman who like... Plus people smoking weed and shit? It's for the front of the class. Okay. Because you gotta like, I mean, are you really gonna care about the hallways and the elevators and... It does smell like soup out there.
Starting point is 00:29:26 That's a lot. A little Febreze wouldn't kill you. Hit it with some Fabuloso, will you? You know what it is? This is like an old Brooklyn building, and it's a mix of rental and co-ops and stuff like that. And there is a smell. There is a lower class has more of a smell. A lot of stews going on in here. A couple of goulashes on the third floor. Yeah, yeah. You go to a lower class has more of a smell. A lot of stews going on in here.
Starting point is 00:29:45 A lot of stews. A couple of goulashes on the third floor. Yeah, yeah. You go to a lower class kitchen. Somebody's peeling onions out there. There's a lot of cooking. There's not a lot of takeout going on. Sure, sure.
Starting point is 00:29:54 And a lot of frying. Yeah, a lot of deep fried foods out there. There's not a lot of healthy poor people. This wonderful episode with the Are You Garbage Boys is brought to you by Factor. I just drank a strawberry banana smoothie, which is 100% plant-based from Factor. This is a great option for people who are trying to count calories, lose weight. These are dietician-approved meals that are sent to you, to your door. This is a ready-to-eat meal kit, and it is America's number one ready-to-eat meal kit. Are you looking for calorie-conscious options?
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Starting point is 00:32:57 They get the cheap food is shitty. Yeah. McDonald's. Why don't they just make better food cheaper? Whole foods don't have a dollar menu, okay? Yeah, that's the problem. Slap the whole foods in a bad neighborhood. Straighten everybody out.
Starting point is 00:33:08 Help people out. Well, why doesn't someone just have a business idea and just go healthy, fast food? That's not cool. I think some of them do. Don't they have those co-ops? Like food costs where you can go and pick up the ugly carrots. But I think you've got to garden or work there or something like that one day a month or some bullshit. But I'm talking about instead of McDonald's, it's like, you know, it's like.
Starting point is 00:33:28 Fresh and Co. Well, that kind of, but nobody puts. Viganold's. Viganold's. They don't want to put them in bad neighborhoods. But at the top, they don't want that. Why not? Because they want to keep everybody unhealthy and keep them down.
Starting point is 00:33:40 That's how they take over. We're getting real politically. Yeah. Even our political takes are about fast food. They probably on some level do, though, right? They have to be. It ain't in their best interest to have them eating fucking salads. Mickey D's just dropped a Big Mac sauce.
Starting point is 00:33:56 You can get it now in the little thing. Finally. You don't think that was fucking... After years of letters. They finally responded. You're like, Andy Dufresne, now I'm going to send two letters a day. Yeah, you did say that like the culmination of your life's work. We did it.
Starting point is 00:34:12 We did it. Finally. You're like Kamala Harris. We did it, Joe. You're like, on to the next cause. Yeah, there we go. We got to take down this Illuminati for separating us by meals. But let me tell you, we did have a little victory with the special sauce.
Starting point is 00:34:26 Yeah. So you can get it. You can get it now. They send it. Yeah. Like the little, the little jobs. What took so long on that? Dude.
Starting point is 00:34:33 What took so long? What idiots? People, I think they could have been making millions. Yeah. I mean, that's probably because they were lazy. They were already making billions. But then people started cracking the code on like TikTok and shit. Like this is how you make the fucking Big Mac secret sauce.
Starting point is 00:34:44 Yeah. So then they were probably like, all right, you know, see the cat's out of their bag. Let's start TikTok and shit. Like, this is how you make the fucking Big Mac secret sauce. Yeah. So then they were probably like, all right, see the cat's out of their bag. Let's start selling this shit. Ketchup, mustard, mayonnaise, and relish. It's pretty easy. Probably a little Worcestershire sauce. Yeah. Maybe a little bit of onion.
Starting point is 00:34:56 It maybe has a little sauce. Big Mac sauce is now available for 50 cents a la carte. That's going to make them $15 billion. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe they didn't want... 50 cents a sauce? Yeah, they were trying to keep it under wraps,
Starting point is 00:35:08 so then you had to get the Big Mac to get the sauce. Sure. Yeah. So now you can just take the sauce and make a Big Mac. Because really, all it takes is a sesame bun and this sauce. And that's it. Yeah, you got it. You got their best-selling product.
Starting point is 00:35:23 I didn't start fucking with the Big Mac until I was an older gentleman. I never had that when I was young. You were more into what? Healthier foods. No. I was a big celery guy in the 90s. Healthier foods. I was more number two guy.
Starting point is 00:35:35 Big Macs were for parents. Really? The parents got the Big Mac. I thought the parents got the Filet-O-Fish. Sometimes. Yeah, the Filet-O-Fish is a real parent order. I was a Filet-O-Fish kid as a young man. My mom would get the Filet-O-Fish Is a real parent order I was a Filet-O-Fish kid As a young man My mom would get
Starting point is 00:35:46 The Filet-O-Fish And like you know Because there's like A rationalization That it's a little Healthier I don't think I've ever Had a Filet-O-Fish
Starting point is 00:35:53 Never If I'm doing fish I ain't going to Mickey D's Going to Long John Silver I didn't know you were I was about to say I'm going right to the source
Starting point is 00:36:02 Shout out to Long John Silver Did you ever go to Long John Silver? You didn't have them up here. No, we don't. See, we didn't have a lot of chains, man. It's really weird growing up in New York because we had no experience with chains. Sure. When you grow up, it's all pizza and Chinese food.
Starting point is 00:36:18 If you grew up in New York in the 80s, 90s, 70s. All local spots. It was all local. There was no chains. When I mean no, I mean zero. There just didn't, it wasn't a part of our life, which was so weird. Because everyone else had such a different,
Starting point is 00:36:32 there was no like, you get Mickey D's once in a while, it was like a, but it wasn't like a road trip or something. Yeah, it wasn't around. You get pizza. I've eaten so much pizza. Oh, I love it. Just pizza. Today I had three slices.
Starting point is 00:36:44 Three already? Three, yeah. Really? Yeah, I'm eaten so much pizza. Oh, I love it. Just pizza. Today I had three slices. You did? Three already? Yeah. Really? Yeah. I'm a sneaky pizza guy. No, dude. What's my appetite like?
Starting point is 00:36:52 I mean, ask Percy. What kind of three slices are we talking about? You didn't go three regs. Three for me is like, I could do eight. I could do eight. What are we talking about? What kind? What's the topic?
Starting point is 00:37:01 I had two regular and one Sicilian. If you're from New York, it's just slice and Sicilian. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how you could... I could always tell someone wasn't from New York because they said, can I get a slice with cheese? I don't like cheese. We say plain.
Starting point is 00:37:14 We would say, like, in Philly, let me get two plain. That's normal. Two plain. That's a normal human being. Yeah, that's... That's good. Yeah. We could say that in New York, too.
Starting point is 00:37:21 Let me get a plain slice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like a Sicilian, though. Sicilians are nice. Yeah. Well, that's probably one of the reasons I'm a fat guy too. A little more tall. Once you switch to that, when you're like, let me get two Sicilians, you've crossed the bridge.
Starting point is 00:37:35 If Sicilian is your slice, you're in trouble. Yeah. That's also, we've said it a bunch, that's a dad slice. A Sicilian? Watching my dad do a Sicilian slice, I'm like, you've got to be 18 to have one of them. You've got to be a big fella. Yeah, not be able to fold it. A quarter slice of I'm like, you got to be 18 to have one of them. You got to go through the wars. You got to be a big fella. Yeah, not be able to fold it.
Starting point is 00:37:47 A quarter slice of Sicilian. You got to hold it. If you can't fold it, that's like a brick. It's like you have to be over 18 to hold it like that. How come I'm pouring sweat and you guys aren't sweating? Because you're a little bigger than we are. It's also hot in here. Woo, it's cooking in here.
Starting point is 00:38:00 Yeah, it's also hot in here. Welcome to a pre-war New York City apartment turned studio. Also, I couldn't live any further. I think we live in, there's not two apartments that are more further than mine and yours. Where's yours? I'm on 181st Street. Wow. You're beyond the wall.
Starting point is 00:38:16 I left yesterday, dude. Yeah. You're like, hey, could you do 230? I'm like, I'm already in Midtown, baby. This is happening whether you want to or not. You're all the way up there? Yeah. I'm right by the bridge. Do you guys do a car you want to or not. You're all the way up there? Yeah. I'm right by the bridge.
Starting point is 00:38:26 You guys do a car or you do a subway? Can't do a subway today. I don't do a subway. No, why? Yeah. Choke your motherfuckers out. Yeah, everyone stay away from the subway. No, yeah, I'm just, I'm an Uber guy.
Starting point is 00:38:36 Took an Uber, yeah. I got the car, though. I did Uber Black, if we're being honest. You did? I did. You posted my balls. I treat myself. It's a long ride.
Starting point is 00:38:44 There's nothing wrong with that. I treat myself. I just don't know. What's the difference between an Uber Black? About 40 bucks. Uber Black's a nicer car. In New York, the guy speaks English. They don't speak to you because they think you're like an executive.
Starting point is 00:38:54 They're like, they're drivers. But then they know you're not when they pick you up on 105,000th Street. I was checking in on one of my rental properties. You're like, ah, this guy's- They're making other stops. This guy must have won a contest. I got to run to the grocery store real properties. You're like, ah, this guy's... They're making other stops. This guy must have won a contest. I got to run to the grocery store real quick. You mind waiting, fatty?
Starting point is 00:39:09 I got to go pick up the baby. I picked them up at 3007th Street. No, they don't, because they're like limo driver-esque. Right, right. So they don't... You just get in, they say, hey, for Kevin. You say, yeah, and then they're chilling. Oh, you might get a Mr. Ryan here and there.
Starting point is 00:39:24 They know. Yeah, a Mr. Ryan. Yeah. It's nice when you get in and hear a chilling. Oh, you might get a Mr. Ryan here and there. I don't know. Yeah, a Mr. Ryan. Yeah. It's nice when you get in and hear a Mr. Hey, what's up, Mr. Ryan? It's nice and classy. Yeah. I blow my mom bad with money is what it's going to be. I'll be broke in about 18 months, but it is what it is.
Starting point is 00:39:37 You're broke now. Tax guy came through. Tax guy cleaned me out. You get jammed up? You always get jammed up. Yeah. You always get jammed up. But my dad gave me Sound advice
Starting point is 00:39:45 A few things he told me Trump 2024 Yanni always take cash He didn't He died He didn't get to see it Really? Yeah he died before COVID
Starting point is 00:39:55 He didn't get to see it He didn't get to see it He didn't get to live out His lifelong dream Of having a reality TV star Around the country He loved reality TV It was either him
Starting point is 00:40:03 Or Jeff Probst He told me He told me Is that the guy from Survivor? Yeah Yeah imagine that's funny V-Star around the country. He loved reality TV. It was either him or Jeff Probst. He told me. He told me. Is that the guy from Survivor? Yeah. Yeah, imagine that's funny. Like if somebody. It's the same thing.
Starting point is 00:40:10 Someone wakes up out of coma and you're like, who's the president? You're like Donald Trump. They're like, ha, ha, ha. Yeah. But even though they do that in Back to the Future, that would have been the same reaction if you woke up in the, if you went to sleep in the 50s and woke up in the 80s. Ronald Reagan was running the show. Right, right, right, right.
Starting point is 00:40:23 Which is. I was born in 76, so I never knew he had a movie career. I just thought he was the guy that took down the Russians. Right. Yeah. You know, eventually I slept real easy at night when Ronnie was in the office. Yeah, yeah. As a kid. I don't know why. Yeah, yeah. And I remember I just woke up one morning
Starting point is 00:40:37 and I walked into my parents' bedroom and on Good Morning America, they were like, yeah, the Soviet Union foul. I was like, oh, alright, sweet. Ronnie! What's the thing to worry about? like, yeah, the Soviet Union foul. I was like, oh, all right, sweet. Ronnie! One less thing to worry about. Yeah, because, you know, it was worrisome back then. Yeah. Worrisome now, too. They're back now.
Starting point is 00:40:53 It ain't all fucking, you know, sunshine and roses now. No, yeah, they, you know, they like to act up over there. They're naughty. I saw the video of the supposed drone that attacked the Kremlin. It looks real fishy. That didn't look like a firecracker. Yeah. It looked like...
Starting point is 00:41:07 It looked like they were trying to build a time machine in Back to the Future. Just like a lightning bolt that went up and it was like, doc failed. But my dad told me two pieces of advice. One of them was, he said, stay away from stupid people. They're just as bad as evil. They can hurt you just as much as evil people. Very true. Right?
Starting point is 00:41:28 Because the stupid gets on you. They don't know. The closer you're to them, something stupid. You should have listened to that. Ah, buddy. You have no idea. He said, never fuck around with your taxes. Oh, of course.
Starting point is 00:41:39 I started doing quarterly because I'm like, get it out of my account now so I don't fucking think it's mine. And actually, Jesse taught. You taught me. You taught me. He taught me way back. He goes, I just take 30% and I throw it right in the savings. So that's what I do.
Starting point is 00:41:52 That's what we've been doing. I get a check and I just take 30 and I throw it in the savings. And it's like, you're just, because you're basically just holding it for them. Uncle Sam's money. Yeah. This was the first time in my life where I was able to just. Yeah. But as two dirtbags who
Starting point is 00:42:05 have... I mean, we used to share clothes. That's how... We're making a couple of bucks, and the fact that my taxes are paid on time, I'm like Jeff Bezos, I feel. You just feel like an adult. I'm like, my taxes are paid. Even though my account's empty, my taxes are paid. When I see construction
Starting point is 00:42:21 on a road, I go and see what they're doing. What are you guys doing over here? It's my gravel jerk off. There's something different about putting on your underwear in the morning when you know your taxes are paid. Yeah, it feels good.
Starting point is 00:42:30 You feel like an adult. Yeah, I have that anxiety. They're clean, yeah. That everything, the other foot's going to drop at some point. That's Catholic shit. That's Catholic shit.
Starting point is 00:42:40 But even today, I'm like, I was walking to get in the shower to come here, and I'm like, that panic just sets in. And I'm like, rent here, and I'm like, that panic just sets in. And I'm like, rent's paid. I'm like, rent's paid.
Starting point is 00:42:48 Taxes are paid. Cars paid. I go, we're okay. I'm good. You can take whatever else you want, but those things are paid. I'm good. Well, you're good, but you do smoke Bernie still. I do like a heater from time to time.
Starting point is 00:42:58 Yeah. I mean, those are no good for you. Those are no good. I'm trying to shake it. I'm trying to shake a lot of things. Who says that? I know. That's Big Pharma telling you that shit. Talk to my friend Mr.
Starting point is 00:43:07 Reynolds. It's liberal propaganda. It is. Yeah. Cigs are yeah. They're not great. Do you do at least American Spirits? That's all. What are we talking about here? I started dabbling in them a little bit. American Spirits? Yeah, because they're longer. Because I'm going to bum one right after this pod.
Starting point is 00:43:23 I know. I was smoking cigarettes for two weeks. Really? You're going to heat her when it's gone? I want to heat her. We were at fucking Rogie's Club. He's like, what do you got? What do you got? I had her fucking chain smoking.
Starting point is 00:43:32 What's the missus say about you? She don't like it. She don't like it. Bleak that. She don't like it. It's no good. I remember I started because I had a little period. What if you went home and lit up one in the house?
Starting point is 00:43:41 Oh, no. Bad. You can't do that. You'd be done, huh? No. There's one. I used to hide behind a tree. Up there?
Starting point is 00:43:47 There's a tree on my property that I know. You are a grade A bozo. I'm going to take the trash out for 15 minutes. Yeah, you just see the tree, and you're like, why is the tree smoking? Is smoke coming out of the sides? The fire truck comes. They got nothing else going on up there?
Starting point is 00:44:00 It's the only spot I can because I got goddamn ring cameras everywhere outside. So you can't sneak a sick because I got goddamn ring cameras everywhere outside. Why do you have the ring cameras? So you can't sneak a cig because I'm on camera. What would the conversation be? You're at the house. Verzi's there.
Starting point is 00:44:11 You got two tree cocktails in you. You know what I mean? Can you have a stick if you want one? I can have a cigar, fine. Say you guys are out back. Verzi's having a stick and you're like,
Starting point is 00:44:20 you know what? I got a pack of heaters from when I was somewhere and you have one and she walks out. What's that convo? Big problem. Big.
Starting point is 00:44:28 Huge problem. Yeah, I like it. Like, will it happen there or will it happen the next day? It's like the cops. It's like the cops. It's like I'm in legal trouble. Yeah, it's like bad. It's like, it's horrible.
Starting point is 00:44:40 She calls Versi's wife. Yeah, it's undoable. You know what's funny about the home security? I wish that was the case for me because my wife don't care. I mean, she cares, but she's European. Soi's wife. Yeah, it's undoable. You know what's funny about the home security? I wish that was the case for me, because my wife don't care. I mean, she cares, but she's European, so it's like... That's right. She don't care. A kid from you from fucking Philly going European, that's like...
Starting point is 00:44:54 Man. Yeah. When I told my mom my girlfriend lived in Germany, she was like, all right, you're gay, it's fine. That's like getting a basketball contract being from Compton. Like, you got a European wife. Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah, she's cool. That's like getting a basketball contract Being from Compton Like you Yeah You got a European wife Yeah it's crazy
Starting point is 00:45:07 Yeah She's cool She lets me smoke She's getting She's over it now At this age Yeah yeah yeah When I met her
Starting point is 00:45:13 She smoked too Where's she from again? Frankfurt Germany But she's Czech Yeah Her parents are Czech And the same thing
Starting point is 00:45:19 Talk about the Soviets The Russians ran in there And they got on a train And fucking skedaddled In the middle of the night Hightailed it out Is she really Czech Or is that something After World War II They kind of They changed but the Soviets, the Russians ran in there, and they got on a train and fucking skedaddled in the middle of the night. I tailed it out. Is she really Czech,
Starting point is 00:45:28 or is that something after World War II, they kind of, they changed it? No, she's... From now on, tell people we're Czech. No, she's Czech, she's Czech-Jew. She grew up in Germany. She was like, yeah, the only Jewish person she knew in Germany. Wow, so if you have kids,
Starting point is 00:45:39 kids are going to be part of the tribe. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. Somebody had, I mean, who had, there's some comic I can't think of who So funny
Starting point is 00:45:47 He's like He married a Jew And he's like I'm gonna have to have To talk with them You know Like what Cause he's not Jewish
Starting point is 00:45:53 But he's gonna have to Tell his son Like you're Jewish People are gonna hate you Not me But you I'm cool with you He's like daddy why
Starting point is 00:46:01 He goes cause you're annoying It's whatever comic I can't remember But but it's some comic. Who I know, too. It's probably, I don't know who. Maybe it was Mike D, Mike D Stefano. Oh, shout out to Mike D. I don't know who it is, though, because now whoever did it is going to be like, damn it, give me credit, but I can't.
Starting point is 00:46:15 I was thinking the other day, you know what's the weird thing about World War II? The whole Italy thing really goes under the radar. What about it? They were on the side of the axis. But so many Italian-Americans fought in World War II on the American side. It's crazy.
Starting point is 00:46:29 Yeah, it's a big difference between Italian-Americans. They're allies. Crazy. Once fucking Germany starts throwing out a chicken parm, then I'll fucking...
Starting point is 00:46:36 Yeah, I'll forget about it, okay? But that was on Mussolini. I'm Greek, though. You can't throw that one past me. Crazy. Yeah, we know all about the Italians. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:45 They invaded Greece. Yeah. We beat all about the Italians. Yeah. They invaded Greece. Yeah. We beat them bad. These Italians, bad. Yeah? Yeah. Gave them the bitch. What year was that?
Starting point is 00:46:52 That was early. That was early on. So Hitler sent them in first. Hitler goes, Mussolini, you go. Those little tanks? Yeah. Remember the little Italian tanks? They wanted to get to Africa, so they were like, they were trying.
Starting point is 00:47:01 The Italians aren't going to take over shit. Dude, you know how much bigger Italy is than Greece? Trying to fuck all the broads and stuff? Yeah, they're just not. Spending too much time in the kitchen? They're not good fighters over there. Pouring hot water on you? Yeah, over there, they're not good fighters. Here, they're good. Oh, yeah. They're rhymed. Yeah. Rocky Marciano, they're dirtbags here.
Starting point is 00:47:17 You know, wife beaters. They got the grit on them. Yeah. They changed it, but over there, they're just soft. It's too romantic. It's too, it's too, it's a beautiful country. It's soft. It's too romantic. It's a beautiful country. It's too romantic. Their hearts weren't in it anyway. They love their ma too much. They love their ma.
Starting point is 00:47:31 They love, you can't. Hey, I can fight, but I got to be home for supper. You know what I mean? I'm eating at the battlefield, but I got to be home by 5 p.m. It's tough. They have to run home every three days to get their laundry done. You got money to share again. What time's the battle?
Starting point is 00:47:45 Ma! What time's the battle? Ma! What time's dinner? I'm sorry, I can't make it. Can you drop me off at the battlefield, Ma? Ma, can you make a spaghetti for a thousand? I got the boys coming over. Oh, sure, bring them over. Bring them over.
Starting point is 00:47:57 Oh, we're bringing out the color. Hey, Ricardo, how's your mother? Oh, I forgot about the calamari. That's right, the Greeks beat them back. Beat them back all the way into Albania. Not only did we beat them back, we conquered some land pushing them back. There's only a couple million Greeks. Everybody's taken a shot at the Greeks over the years.
Starting point is 00:48:15 People try to take shots at the champ. Yeah. But we're still. The Turks? The Turks took a big shot. The Turks took a big shot. They took a 400-year shot. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:22 Is that where you got Ritsina from? Is that where Ritzina came from? I thought I remember when I was working at the Greek place. I'm pretty impressed that you know what Ritzina is. Of course. Yeah. What is it? It's a wine that has like a pine flavor.
Starting point is 00:48:34 He's got a drinking problem. What do you mean he's surprised you know what fucking Ritzina is? I don't know what Ritzina is. It's a Greek, you know. A little powder mousseline? Let's fucking go. Yeah, it's actually raisin, right? So it's like, maybe we can look that up.
Starting point is 00:48:44 Can you look up what Retsina? So Retsina is a white wine. Gotcha. R-E-T-S-I-N. Jesse types with two fingers. So do I. He's an artist. I'm real bad.
Starting point is 00:48:53 Turned keyboard. So Retsina, yeah, what is it? What's in it? It's raisin. I'm pretty sure. A resin. Resin. It's like a pine resin.
Starting point is 00:49:02 Yeah, pine resin. That they used to line the pots with that they would let it sit in. It's kind of embarrassing that I'm Greek and I was calling it a raisin. It's resin. It's resin. But I thought, from my understanding, is when the Turks were coming in, they poured all the wine into these things because they wanted the Turks not to like the wine or something like that. That's some fucking great shit. They did it to, like, fuck with them or something like that.
Starting point is 00:49:23 That could be true. I don't know. Or. Yeah's some fucking great shit. They did it to, like, fuck with them or something like that. That could be true. I don't know. Or. Yeah, but it's not. It tastes really good. Yeah, it's good. It's not. Especially on a hot day with a spicy dish.
Starting point is 00:49:34 That doesn't sound like it's a real story, though. But if that is, that's pretty amazing. Yeah. Because that's, like, one of those things. A lot of times in life, the worst things end up having the best consequences. Yeah. You know? The Turks were coming, and they were like, fuck them.
Starting point is 00:49:45 Yeah. I couldn't take the wine with them. Usually people who are like the most. You can take my land. Don't take my wine. Don't take the wine. Don't touch my feta. Did you already have Greek Easter, by the way?
Starting point is 00:49:53 Yeah. That already happened? That already happened? Did you do something nice? No. We just went to the in-laws, cousins, uncles, aunts. She's Greek too, right? She's Greek.
Starting point is 00:50:02 She's Greek. Half Greek, half Sicilian. She's half Greek, half Sicilian. Keep an eye on that one. Yeah. Yeah. Machi machi. Oh, right? She's Greek She's Greek Italian She's Greek Half Greek, half Sicilian She's half Greek, half Sicilian Keep an eye on that one Yeah Yeah Oh no, that's It's rough
Starting point is 00:50:09 At night time, it's rough She turns like Jekyll and Hyde During the day, she's sweet At night She turns into a different person She's like, she's mean She's evil at night About her sleep
Starting point is 00:50:18 About quiet Yeah She's dictatorial Italians have a little bit Of that fascist thing in them They just do My girl gets like that at night. Because it's Mussolini, that thing, it's just in Italians.
Starting point is 00:50:29 That fascism, that kind of quiet, control and quiet. It's just in there. I feel like at night is when my girl gets real militant too. She wants to make sure everything's cleaned up before she goes to bed and she's running around doing this, doing that. It gets nerve-wracking. Yeah. This is Verzi right now.
Starting point is 00:50:48 Verzi. Yeah, what's up, man? Where you at? I'm on the podcast with the RU Garbage fellas. What up, Verzi? Oh, what's up, man? Verzi, I'm dying in here. It's 100 degrees in this apartment.
Starting point is 00:51:00 You called at a perfect time because we were talking about Ritzina, we were talking about Greek stuff, and I was actually about to bring up that you're half Greek, but you're kind of like you were brainwashed into being Italian a little bit. Well, no, I mean, not brainwashed. It's just, you know, my dad's crazy, and he said that Sicilians are the best people on earth, and my mom rebelled against my Greek grandmother. So that's why it kind of stuck with me, you know? Yeah. Well, I just want to remind you that you're Greek and you're welcome back anytime. You're welcome in the club.
Starting point is 00:51:37 I don't mean to interrupt the podcast, man. I'll call you back. Yes, call me back. Look at you on the watch. Yeah, that was really, that was a real 2023 moment. Yeah, right there. Look at you on the watch. Yeah, that was really... I love it. That was a real 2023 moment. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:47 Right there. Imagine waking up after... I didn't know they did that. You didn't know that? No, I didn't know you could talk into it. You're an interesting guy. You know Christina, but you don't know that you can talk to people on the internet. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:00 That's the situation. It's not food related. Yeah. And Apple Watch don't go good with a span of coconut. You know what I mean It don't fuck you up And it don't make you fat He's out
Starting point is 00:52:08 And if it ain't World War II Yeah We've been ending up On a lot of stuff At the same time recently We just did Yeah flight 3855 From fucking LaGuardia
Starting point is 00:52:17 To Austin That was fun When I texted you I'm sitting here And I get I got my eyes on you You fucking garbage pizza He starts threatening me via
Starting point is 00:52:25 text on an airplane, which is a federal charge, I think. He wouldn't get the Sky Marshall. He didn't have my number programmed in, so he didn't know who it was. Yeah, I didn't know who it was, and I'm like... And I kind of knew that for some reason. I kind of knew. For some reason, I just... I think I might even hit you with a new phone who's this. Right, you did hit me with a new
Starting point is 00:52:41 phone who's this. Yeah, which is a 2023 for you better fucking tell me who this is or I'm going to turn this goddamn plane around. I don't like numbers. I don't know. Yeah, so I started
Starting point is 00:52:51 hitting him with that and I let it go for a little while. Yeah, it was like nine texts. Like, I see you, you fucking seat 1A, motherfucker. I said, I'm going to tell your fans
Starting point is 00:52:59 you guys are in first class. I'll tell you you're fucking lying pieces of shit. And then he throws you under the bus and he goes, we got to go in first class because the big fella's got to be able to face it. The big man needs. Sit next to me on a flight more than 45 minutes.
Starting point is 00:53:11 You'll be begging for first class. You'll pay whatever you want. I feel bad for my girlfriend anywhere we fly because we're in the back. But then Yanni said, tell the big man to lean left because we're about to sort of do a barrel roll. That was a goodie. Yeah, yeah. Folks, hang on one second. Then you told me about his bloody marriage. goodie. Yeah, yeah. Folks, hang on one second. Then you told me about his Bloody Marys, like nine.
Starting point is 00:53:28 Yeah, I'm like, he's nine deep already. Yeah, a couple of blocks. I think I fell asleep. Yeah, which usually happens after nine Bloody Marys. Now, what's the heartburn like after nine Bloody Marys? It's not bad. It's not bad. So it gets to a point like four is bad, but then you go past it, it's nine.
Starting point is 00:53:41 No, well, I take Nexium, which you can eat glass on that thing for my acid reflux. And it's not really like spicy food that does it to me. It's shitty food that does it to me. Like if I have McDonald's, I have the worst heartburn ever. Yeah. But a nice Bloody Mary, I'm okay. That's weird. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:57 Because usually it's the Bloody Mary, the tomato sauce, the orange juice, the citrus. They get you. Bacon in the morning will jam me up. Yeah. I don't know why. Yeah. On an empty stomach. So fried stuff, maybe. Fried stuff is bad.
Starting point is 00:54:09 Yeah, that gives you heartburn, too. Yeah, I don't do it. I've ruined this ottoman, by the way. I can feel it. It's creasing. I've been looking at creasing, dude. You are six inches. We're going to have to reframe this.
Starting point is 00:54:21 For the last 20 minutes, I've been thinking, how am I going to get out of here? My legs hurt so bad right now. You were supposed to be sitting here, but you said you didn't like the pose. This is better optically, I think, for the face. People could be eating out there, Yanni. And now I'm all sweaty. Now you look like the Buddha from Philly. You look like the Buddha if the booty grew up in Philly.
Starting point is 00:54:44 Would it change? It's fucking... People leaving percocets on my feet. Guys, you know, there's no hoop. Just gotta... You have to, you know...
Starting point is 00:54:52 Just, you know, you can't want anything. You gotta accept, you know, occasional... To put mayonnaise on a Italian hoagie is wrong. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:03 So, how's the Are You Garbage army doing? They're doing they're good they're good shout out to the army shout out to the ayg army you guys got probably the funnest live show you guys are killing it thank you your fans come out and you play these games with them yes which is like the perfect fun night out it's awesome and the live show is we co-headlined. We've been comics for fucking 10, 12, 14 years, whatever the fuck it is. So we each co-headlined. Not with a good time.
Starting point is 00:55:33 Thanks for having us over. I got two words. Window unit. All right? Something. Jesus. It's hot in here. I feel like a hostage.
Starting point is 00:55:43 It's actually not that bad. And you know what? DeRosa made a good point when he was here. We should It's hot in here. I feel like a hostage. It's actually not that bad. And you know what? DeRosa made a good point when he was here. We should just put the AC on. I mean, the audio quality, nobody gives a shit. A little room tone. Nobody gives a shit. Yeah, nobody cares.
Starting point is 00:55:54 They don't care if there's a little buzz in the back. Anyway, go ahead. I mean, I'm pretty sure he's on the verge of a panic attack. Well, here's the good thing. My legs hurt so bad. The funny part is is it'll be because of this episode that we institute that policy,
Starting point is 00:56:08 but we won't do it this episode. Sure. And then we'll probably never come back. We'll be like, do it in some future generations. Yeah, if Foley dies,
Starting point is 00:56:14 we'll be like, we got to put the AC on because Foley died on the podcast. Foley didn't make it out of Big Ridge. They buried him on 3rd Avenue.
Starting point is 00:56:21 So we got to just have the podcast in here, right? That's not safe. Put me in the planter downstairs. Yeah. You were saying, I'm sorry. Oh, no, so the live show is we co-headline, and then we play AYG with the crowd.
Starting point is 00:56:30 Everybody emails, and you get there, and they email in their, like, garbage question, which we found out everybody wants to ask their garbage question. Some of them are fucking bananas crazy. Yeah, they're great. And then it's like, we just do that. We shit on.
Starting point is 00:56:41 It's a fucking good fucking time. And you know what's wild that we've noticed? People, some people really open up about shit that you wouldn't want really wouldn't want to tell another person they ask in front of 200 people and it's great yeah we had this one in Gramercy where the girl said is it garbage to uh leave your job as a pharmacist to shuck oysters in Long Island and as soon as she asked that, I was like, she didn't leave that voluntarily. Something happened. I was like, what happened?
Starting point is 00:57:09 She's like, yeah, I was dipping into the perks. Yeah. And just had this real honest moment, man. It was so fucking great. That's fun. Yeah, it was really cool. Yeah. And, like, everybody applauded her.
Starting point is 00:57:18 We're like, thank you for sharing. It's like a real fucking dirtbag moment. Because we all have that going on. Yeah. That's the great thing about it. And that's why it'll never run out of legs is because we are all, all trash.
Starting point is 00:57:29 We never, when we made it, we weren't thinking about it and it was just more of like, oh, it'll be fun to get some laughs and we'll tell some stories or whatever.
Starting point is 00:57:36 But like, we're realizing that everybody is trash and everybody wants to share. It's, and it's not like, ah, you fucking did this.
Starting point is 00:57:44 It's, it's like, welcome to the party. You know what I mean? It's like, come on in the water, it's fine it's not like ah you fucking did this it's it's like welcome to the party you know it's like come on in the water's fine yeah yeah it's celebrated not fucking yeah made fun of yeah and that's how it should be i mean you know people should just have a sense of humor about themselves and know that they're garbage we're fungus growing on a rock sure it's really what we are yes we're all trash we're gonna die we're so small infinitely small in this universe and we're nothing compared to Muhammad, the prophet.
Starting point is 00:58:08 What the fuck? Dump that. What the fuck's this fucking commie bastard talking about? I got to go home for Mother's Day. What are you doing to me? You know, as far as purity goes, we're low on the scale. Very. Question for you guys. Go ahead. My mom used to reuse paper towels.
Starting point is 00:58:24 That's an immigrant thing. Is that trash or immigrant? How did she reuse them? What are we talking about? Exactly. She would dry them. So she'd use it to dry the counter.
Starting point is 00:58:35 Okay. And then she'd hang it on the dish drying rack. She'd hang them on the side like that. She'd fold it over the pole. That's like grandmother. That's like immigrant shit.
Starting point is 00:58:45 That is what it is. They don't, in their head, like, my, like, because same thing, my mom, my wife's mom will come over and they were like refugees from Czechoslovakia at the time. So it's like in her head to like throw something out that you used once. They're like, the Russians might come back. You know, I need that at some point. Right. So it's like she saves shit.
Starting point is 00:59:02 And I'm like, you got to fucking trash this. What are we doing here? But it's still trash. It is. So it's like she saves shit, and I'm like, you got to fucking trash this. What are we doing here? But it's still trash. It is, but it's not a laziness thing. It's like a scarcity thing. It's like it's an anxiety. It's not like. But we can't just be around making excuses for people.
Starting point is 00:59:15 It's like, listen. You're not in communist Russia anymore. The Cossacks aren't coming. Fucking use it. They're 99 cents a roll. You can't shake that shit though that easily. Yeah, you can't. That's generational though.
Starting point is 00:59:24 That takes a couple generations. You're like, listen, Svelte-na. Just fucking throw it out. Throw it out. I'll buy you a new one. I'll buy you a fucking new one. My mom reuses the Ziploc bags. The big ones. Those things are like luggage.
Starting point is 00:59:38 She just washes them out and reuses them. Yeah, that's the thing you're going. At some point, you gotta go gotta At some point you gotta go You're gonna At some point you guys Are making fun of poor people Let's be honest
Starting point is 00:59:50 Sure Cause they're going Hey yeah I'm doing that now Yeah No I'm kidding You're going Hey I drink grape drink
Starting point is 00:59:54 You're like It's kinda trash Oh I love grape drink Yeah it's good though You kidding me It's good That's the problem A lot of trashy shit
Starting point is 01:00:00 Is very good And a lot of fun to do Yes that's true It's great That is true And we found it's not really poor or rich because there's so many people that grew up wealthy or grew up with money that did so much. Their parents did the trashiest shit.
Starting point is 01:00:14 Sometimes the wealthiest people are the most frugal. Right. You know what I mean? And do shit like that. Right, right, right, right, right, right, right. So even you, you make a good buck. You were telling us you throw all your trash in a fireplace. I throw my underwear and I shit them in the fireplace too.
Starting point is 01:00:27 I don't care how much money you got in the trash. Yeah, but that's thrifty though. No, no, no. You don't want to... That's trash. You don't want anyone to... Good point. You don't want anyone to find your undies in the trash.
Starting point is 01:00:38 But if you fucking... I do it like a body. It's like I killed someone. You want to get rid of the evidence. He burns it. He's sitting there with a scotch. Trying to forget what happened.
Starting point is 01:00:49 Sitting by the fireplace. Forgive me, Father Fire. It's been three days since I've seen my parents. How often is that fire going out there? It sounds like
Starting point is 01:00:55 every fucking day. You do it in the house, don't you? I streak my Tommy Johns all the time. And believe me, I don't like throwing away a $30 pair of fucking underwear,
Starting point is 01:01:04 but I do it. I do it because I don't want my... You burn it in the fireplace? My mother-in-law does my laundry, I don't like throwing away a $30 pair of fucking underwear, but I do it. I do it because I don't want my... My mother-in-law does my laundry. I don't want her to find my fucking streaks. You sure you ain't Italian? Greek's pretty close. Ah, that's awesome. Yeah. Your mother-in-law seeing your dirty drawers? She's...
Starting point is 01:01:19 Your family. She's my family. Maybe she's not looking too close. Jeez, dude, I don't care who you are. You grab someone else's pair of underwear, you take a little looky-loo. I always get black underwear. Let's be honest. There's always a streak on that.
Starting point is 01:01:31 She does it better than you would, right? Don't they smell better and fresher when a mom does them? 100%. 100%. She's basically living with us at this point because, like, the kids and stuff like that. That kind of helps out a little bit. That's awesome.
Starting point is 01:01:43 Yeah. And they probably love having grandma around. It's the best. It's the best. Yeah, it's just nice to watch my kid have a grandparent around. Sure. You know? It's a good thing.
Starting point is 01:01:54 Yeah. We don't do that too much in America anymore. We throw the grandparents out. I want that. Send them down to Florida. Ship them out. I want to try to get my mom up here, but she won't do it. That's good.
Starting point is 01:02:03 That's old school. That's the way it should be. Dude, your mom is what? A seven-year-old mover up the Queens? She lives in the Burbs. She's got a pool. She don't want to come up to a four-story walk-up. That's insane. Got this broad on the F train and shit.
Starting point is 01:02:17 I'm still pushing. What the fuck? She's got a Jeep. She's chilling. She's got a yard. Don't move her up here. But if we have kids, I would love to have that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm looking at houses in the Burbs by my family all outside of Philly. Ooh, you going back home? It's the same thing. I'm the same distance as you if I go to Philly.
Starting point is 01:02:33 That's a good point. I go to the Burbs of Philly. I say, why go an hour north? Why go an hour south? I'm fucking 15 minutes from the fam. That's a good point, actually. You're in between. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:42 Yeah. It's like, yeah, my commute's 45 minutes or an hour, hour 10, whatever the fuck it is. Yeah. Yeah. Just do it that way. Yeah, and it's not, there's a lot of- Get a pool, get a house with a yard. Then you get a little summer home down there in Point Pleasant.
Starting point is 01:02:53 Nah, Wildwood. I'm a North Wildwood guy, baby. What's- It's the trashiest of the trash. Point Pleasant. It's where plumbers can afford a house. That's where I go. Is Point Pleasant no good?
Starting point is 01:03:00 Point Pleasant's classy, bro. Yeah, it's real classy. Yeah, so then why'd you say it like it wasn't? Because he's not going to nice, classy places. He's going to North Wildwood. I can't. With the rest of the HVAC people. Dude, the best line I ever heard.
Starting point is 01:03:12 A lot of plumbing vans parked down there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I spent a lot of when you go to the beach, you know how people put up like, I went to Penn State to put up a Penn State flag. It's all Trump flags. Yeah, yeah. It's all Temple University and Trump flags. But I was on the beach in North Wildwood.
Starting point is 01:03:25 I spent the pandemic down there just randomly. I was just, we went down for the weekend because they were like talking about locking down New York. So me and the, me and the bird were like, let's go down there for two, three days. You and the bird?
Starting point is 01:03:36 Me and the bird. Yeah. We're like, let's lock it down for two, three days. Let's go down there for two, three days because we're going to be locked in this fucking apartment for two weeks. It sounds like.
Starting point is 01:03:43 And then we got down there and that night we got down there, they were like, New York shut down. I'm like, I ain't fucking going back there. Remember we thought it was two weeks? Yeah, every week. Two weeks. Whatever.
Starting point is 01:03:52 But we were on the beach and there was this, she looked like, she looked like dog to bounty hunters wife. Like fucking big busty broad fucking cans hanging out. And she goes, what the,
Starting point is 01:04:03 it was when everybody, antibodies, vaccine, it was all, you know, it was probably like, it was And she goes, what? It was when everybody, antibodies, vaccine. It was all, you know, it was probably like, it was probably like May, right? All that stuff's whirling around. What is what? She goes,
Starting point is 01:04:11 what the fuck is an antibody anyway? Does that mean you got it or you don't? Who the fuck knows? And I was like, we are fucked. I don't know what antibodies are, but I ain't living next to them.
Starting point is 01:04:21 I'll tell you that. The fuck is an antibody anyway? How did you guys get together? Did you meet in comedy? Yeah. Yeah, in Philly. He needed somebody to bum smokes off of. That's what happened? Yeah, that's what happened. We had an open mic in Philly
Starting point is 01:04:35 that everybody used to do, and he started doing it, and we became buddies. So did you become buddies and then move down together, or you moved down and then you were like, oh, good to see you. There was a bunch of us in Philly. Yeah, we came in on a wave. Yeah, we came in on a wave. We were all down there for about five, seven years. People started trickling up.
Starting point is 01:04:50 And then in 2013, Cassidy had Tommy Cassidy had just moved up. Reggie and I, Reggie Conquest and I moved up, I think, on the same day. Yeah. Just at January 1st or 2nd. And then he moved up in the summer. Nice. And when did you decide to start Are You Garbage? This is our third podcast together.
Starting point is 01:05:09 Yeah, we just signed one. We had one that failed called Center City Comedy. We had another one that failed called Hard Feelings. That was the mic we ran in Philly was called the Center City Comedy Show. And then when that kind of dissolved, we weren't using Center City Comedy. And then we were up here running around for maybe like six, eight months, and then we just happened to get together and do a show, and we had a bunch of Philly people on it.
Starting point is 01:05:32 And then after that, we're like, you know, we should focus on that rather than, you know, trying to appease New York Comics and all that stuff, start doing our own thing. So then we started the Center City Comedy podcast. We did that for about four or five years, and then that fizzled off, and then we did Hard Feelings. That had about 70 listeners. Yeah, then we started the Center City Comedy Podcast. We did that for about four or five years. And then that fizzled off and then we did Hard Feelings. I had about 70 listeners.
Starting point is 01:05:49 Mostly my family. And then we did Are You Garbage? Right. So we've been podcasting together for 10 years. Interesting. So you were friends the whole time and then you had the third thing that hit. And it was also like we were working with other people, like a bigger extended thing. And it was always kind of me and him always had the bigger vision of like
Starting point is 01:06:08 the pod is, you know, the motor of that's like, well, that's what's pushing everybody else, like all these big comics. So you just like, we got to figure out what it is. We got to figure out what it is. The stripped down version of our identity was Are You Garbage? We knew we were very good together, right? Like our rhythm, our cadence.
Starting point is 01:06:23 Very good. Like amazing. It's fun to watch. you garbage. We knew we were very, we're very good together, right? Like our rhythm, our cadence. Very good. And, like, amazing. It's fun to watch. And we try to make each, because we're swinging and make each other laugh. Like, I know exactly
Starting point is 01:06:31 what makes him laugh and he knows what, so we're like, it's just like sparring, just trying to make fun of each other and get each other to laugh. And then we were doing a show
Starting point is 01:06:38 in fucking the middle, it was like Pittsburgh or Altoona, Pennsylvania. We only got a couple minutes left. I'm so uncomfortable. I don't think I'm getting out of this seat. I swear to God.
Starting point is 01:06:47 Don't worry. We're going to get a crane to help you out of here. You're definitely going to have to move these chairs. My legs are so stiff. I feel like Murtaugh sitting on the toilet. Nothing on that. Take the gun. Shut up.
Starting point is 01:06:58 That leaves a weapon, too. I'm so open to shit. I got to drag his ass around the country. This is what it's like. Yeah, well, you guys, you got to walk at a slower pace. Well, now, I just, I walk fast. I walk faster than the average human. So you just text them later.
Starting point is 01:07:15 I just go, hey, man. I keep up with them. He does, but I go. In the airport, I catch up on the little escalator things. Well, no, that's where I smoke them. That's where I really gain distance. When we were on that plane with you, we were in the last terminal. Oh, that. That's where I smoke them. That's where I really gain distance. When we were on that plane with you,
Starting point is 01:07:26 we were in the last terminal in like J.F. Taylor. Oh, that was the worst day of my life. It was a 20-minute walk. What the fuck is that bullshit?
Starting point is 01:07:33 That's the spot Delta has? All that money? You're down at the end of the fucking airport? Jesus Christ. Dude, I go, I'll meet you. I saw how far
Starting point is 01:07:41 while we were at like B1 and we had to be at like B88. I'm like, dude, I'll fucking see you down there. So, dude, he just kept getting smaller. I would look back. He was smaller and smaller. Dude, I was stopping to take a pee.
Starting point is 01:07:52 I stopped and got headphones, got a smoothie. And then I fucking finally like... I was pouring sweat when I got there. Look at the fucking unibomber. We're going to let me on a plane. That's probably why she cut me off on a Bloody Mary. I was pouring sweat. And I had two, three Bloody Marys in me.
Starting point is 01:08:07 You ever try to walk when you're drunk? Oh, that's sad. Yeah. Being drunk and fat's tough. Oh, just pouring sweat. Yeah, it's a double whammy trying to walk. Brutal. You guys are living the dream because you get to tour together.
Starting point is 01:08:18 It's fun to go with a friend. That's so cool. It's like we're so fortunate. We bring Toby comes with this. New guy Luke comes with this, who's our other editor. And Tommy Cassidy. Toby's great. Remember when I did the episode and I said, how's your girl?
Starting point is 01:08:31 And you guys, do you remember that? So Toby's their producer. You guys probably know if you're fans of theirs, you're watching. Tebow. Yeah, Tebow. And so me and him, we talked for a little while. And he did a couple clips for me. And he was telling me about his girl.
Starting point is 01:08:44 And I was like, you know, at that time, my mom was going down, my dad was going. I had a period where everyone in my family was sick and dying. Yeah, me too. It was a rough period, and so I was talking to him, and then I came in. I hadn't spoken to him in a while. I came in to do the first Are You Garbage? And I was like, Toby, you know, I was like, how's your girlfriend?
Starting point is 01:08:59 And everyone was just quiet, and they go, and you guys were like, well, she's dead. She's no longer with us. I was like, sorry, man. We were like, the balls to come in and lead with that is nuts. Hey, what's up? I haven't seen you in two years since we last talked about your sick girlfriend. How's she doing, by the way?
Starting point is 01:09:15 It almost came off like I was joking. Like, yeah, so how's the girl? Yeah, it was like a roast. She's been dead for a year. I'm like, oh, Jesus, sorry. Yeah, T-Bone really went through it. It was tough. But we couldn't have done it without him.
Starting point is 01:09:26 He's awesome. It is kind of crazy. It is one of those things, life-wise, that made me kind of re... The first year the pod started doing well, between me, him, and T-Bone, we all had a personal...
Starting point is 01:09:42 Took lumps. We were just fucking... It's one of those things, we all and like dude we were just fucking and you're like it's one of those things too of like oh just the whole
Starting point is 01:09:48 10 years you're working doing comedy like as long as my comedy career takes off everything will be okay and then it does and you're like
Starting point is 01:09:54 oh no this isn't the answer you know what I mean like it's just like if your personal life's great your professional life might be shit
Starting point is 01:10:01 and it was like I like had to zoom out and be like look at it from 10,000 feet of like okay like it's not all And be like Look at it from 10,000 feet Of like Okay like It's not all gonna be
Starting point is 01:10:07 Fucking sunshine and roses Cause we got Yanni P on the pod Yeah Cause like you said At the end of the day No matter what Whether you're rich You're poor
Starting point is 01:10:14 Black, white Hispanic, Chinese Whatever We're all fucking trash Yeah And everything And life is trash Yeah
Starting point is 01:10:21 Life's shit That's why we have a job Yeah We make people laugh We cheer them up I know Because life is shit Tragedy doesn's shit. That's why we have a job. We make people laugh. We cheer them up. I know. Because life is shit. Tragedy doesn't stop.
Starting point is 01:10:27 And you're all going to die. I'll say this, though. Looking back, the only thing that I regret is sitting in this seat. That's the only thing. I mean, that was a wild call, dude. I'm hurting so bad. We should have done this from bed, to be honest. Two of my favorite guys.
Starting point is 01:10:43 You guys are fucking funny. You're all so warm. And you're good people. Thank you, buddy. You got the trifecta. Yeah, you're sweating. They're great. Are You Garbage? If you don't know, now you know. You gotta go check these guys on the road. Thank you, buddy. On their tour.
Starting point is 01:10:58 What's the webby? AreYouGarbage.com. Just launched it last week, baby. That's a domain name. That's how bad a business we are. We just launched a website last week. And also, I bought the wrong one. I sent it to the web guy. I go, yeah, I got it. Here's the domain.
Starting point is 01:11:10 He goes, this is spelled wrong. I said, all right, let me buy the new one. RUgarage.com. I love how big your eyes are. I got a big set of peepers on me. You got a big set of fucking baby blues. I open them up on you, too. That's a nice pick.
Starting point is 01:11:24 He did a good job with that. Yeah. I have gum in my mouth. Yeah. I thought I was losing a tooth. The greatest guys in the world. Thank you, buddy. Philly's own.
Starting point is 01:11:32 Love you, buddy. Thank you, guys. Thank you so much for having us. Thank you for coming. Of course. Thank you. Yeah. And thanks for-
Starting point is 01:11:36 Quite a bit of joy. Thanks for breaking my Ottoman. That's the fall of the Ottoman Empire right there. Now pull in the crate. Let's get the big guy out of that seat. All right. Truth be told, last night I had myself a nice little root beer. Oh, you got a little naughty, didn't you?
Starting point is 01:11:54 I got a little naughty. I had a Brooklyn Cannery. Oh, so you didn't get naughty. Root beer. No, I didn't get naughty. I was good. You got healthy. I'm not on Santa's naughty list.
Starting point is 01:12:02 No, not at all. I was watching the games. I have a case of jalapeno lime left I have almost a case of root beer And then I have to re-up Because I have drunken Is drunken the way you say it? I've drank
Starting point is 01:12:15 Sure why not I've drunken all the rest Of my Brooklyn Cannery sodas Because they're that good They're really good Brooklyncannery.com 15% off your next order of all
Starting point is 01:12:28 your healthy, all natural sodas. No added sugar. Low in calories. And when I mean low in calories, it's not like because they put like the Diet Coke. What does Diet Coke use? It's like... Chemicals and shit. There's no chemicals in this. They use stevia. They use monk fruit. They sweeten these sodas
Starting point is 01:12:43 with natural stuff. Shit that you can read, that you can pronounce. You can digest, let's be honest. Yeah, that other shit went into the atomic bomb. Absolutely. It's chemicals. And these are prebiotic sodas, which means they're good for your gut as well. They have some, what is that, live cultures in there, I guess.
Starting point is 01:13:00 That's what that means. Something like that. Prebiotic. Prebiotic. So do you order some of these? Yes, I do. Yeah. These are a great option if you like soda.
Starting point is 01:13:08 It really is. You just, they order, you order a case to your house or whatever you want. BrooklynCannery.com. Promo code Giannis Pappas. You'll get 15% off your order. Any order. So go ahead and get them. We love Brooklyn Cannery.
Starting point is 01:13:21 Chrissy Minetti. I think he emailed us. What is he saying? He's buying a sign. But before he buys a sign, if you need cash, if you need cash, okay, and you got a check, go meet Chris Minetti somewhere. Just call him up, 215-750-3730 in the South Jersey Philly area, and he will cash your check.
Starting point is 01:13:45 He's a check-cashing establishment. That's all he does. Don't ask him to do nothing else. If you need a business check cashed, that's what you got to do. And that's all there is to it. Ask Yanni to add free check cashing if you show proof of thalassemia minor.
Starting point is 01:14:01 So Mediterranean kids, no charge. Did he send another? Scroll down to the bottom. Dude, there's so many messages. Yeah, go all the way to the bottom. Let's see what the last one is from Minetti. All right, give me a minute. Really?
Starting point is 01:14:12 Oh, because you got to go. Just click on it. It'll go to the, it'll go, click on here. Oh, all right, we'll do it at the end. Yeah. All right, let's go to the next one. Did you read his number? Yeah, I read his number.
Starting point is 01:14:21 All right. For the free.art music in Hawaii. Next. Exclusiveautoshipping.com. Yeah I read his number For the free Dot art Music in Hawaii Next Exclusiveautoshipping.com You're moving your wheels Or if you bought a car out of state Hit up exclusiveautoshipping.com Student and military discounts
Starting point is 01:14:35 Are available as well What else we got? Manly Girly Studios You know the deal Get their merch Check out their podcasts 20% off their merch With promo code
Starting point is 01:14:47 WEPA And don't forget to check out Their biggest hit Ju-Anon Costa de Thinky The Manly Girly Show If you're in North Carolina Go to their live show
Starting point is 01:14:59 At their house Couple of North Carolina kids Doing a bunch of They got a podcast network I love when guys got a network Of five or six podcasts That's when you know We're in like a boom
Starting point is 01:15:12 They don't have just one With a few listeners They got five You never know what's gonna hit You never know Keep throwing stuff at the wall You heard the RU Garbage guys They did it
Starting point is 01:15:20 Three failed ones No but those guys Are blowing up big. Okay. Our favorite lady here, Samantha Gubera. Right, Gubera? That's correct. All right.
Starting point is 01:15:36 Check out her farrier service in Nashville, 864-200-9007. Or visit the sporthorsefarrier.com If your horse needs new shoes Get the hooves right She's basically Like the goat app for horses Pretty much, yes Get your horse some new kicks
Starting point is 01:15:57 At the sports The sport horse farrier Sporthorsefarrier.com. 864-200-900. Everyone's got a horse, and everyone's in the market for a farrier. So enough with these obscene vet bills from these bullshit farriers. Sam Gubera is the real deal. And I know because I got tons of experience dealing with farriers.
Starting point is 01:16:25 So I know what a good farrier is like. Displaypros.net Somebody else is making our sign. You're too slow. What do they do, Displays.net? Displays. Pros. If you have anything that you need for a car show or anything like that or any
Starting point is 01:16:41 outdoor salesman or whatever. If you got a business and you it to be on the display, hit these guys up. They'll hook you up. They have a free consultation, I believe, right? So, yeah, just go to displaypros.net, and if you go put in the code WHATSTHEDEALIST, you'll get 10% off your first purchase.
Starting point is 01:16:56 Tell them that Giannis sent you. Or Jared. Or, yeah, or Jesse, or Jesse's glasses. The finger painter. Hey, Jesse, another updated copy. Jesus Christ. Chat GBT, channeling Kanye. Is this our cute Nofumara Eastern Hemi, but we'll suck a cock for a penny?
Starting point is 01:17:13 Yeah. That's him. He wrote The City. Have you read it? Has anyone read a page of it? No. No. Let's just be honest.
Starting point is 01:17:18 I tried to go to the Instagram page for it, but then my Instagram got reported. So. All right. So this is his new review. Just peep the city. Shit's straight up crazy, like a movie on paper. Gang wars, political battles, and one OG ex-military dude holding it down.
Starting point is 01:17:34 If you're about that life, check it out. Hashtag urban mayhem. Hashtag revenge plot. Hashtag skyscraper life. Okay. Alright, yeah. So go check out the book, the city, or the novel, the graphic novel, The City. There's also an Instagram page for So go check out the book, the city or the novel, the graphic novel, the city.
Starting point is 01:17:46 There's also an Instagram page for it. Where's it at Jesse? Uh, the city graphic novel on Instagram. Yeah. Sarah czar.com. Sarah czar.com as well. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:56 But they dropped a couple of copies and the third copies come in. The third chapter chapter is coming pretty soon. So check that out. He should just send a copy to the studio. Send a copy to the studio, buddy. Message us, send a copy, send a copy to the studio. Send a copy to the studio, buddy. Message us, send a copy to the studio. Send a copy to the studio so Giannis can read all the words wrong.
Starting point is 01:18:09 Yeah, we could have Jared act it out. Well, what we'll do is we'll read it here. We'll open it to a page and we'll read a scene. Yes. I'm sure it's great. All right, Staffing Beaver. Does one thing. What does they do?
Starting point is 01:18:20 They eat pussy. Yeah. Staffing Beaver. They hire chicks to get sexually harassed. They find you offshore remote talent to fill important roles in your business. Basically, are you looking for a hot chick who's going to look the other way when you sexually harass her? Yes. Beaver staffing got the job for you.
Starting point is 01:18:36 Just think Andrew Tate, but seaside. Now, how are you going to have a name Beaver Staffing and not be looking for porn actresses? You know this is a front for chicks to be cam girls. Yes, yes. This is fucking a subsidiary of Andrew Tate's company, Beaver. It's all in the name. All right, so only ladies apply. And are you comfortable with being on film?
Starting point is 01:19:02 All right, you do a 30-minute discovery call, and you can save 70% on what you're currently paying to fill roles locally. So if you're a business looking to hire talent, right, you call Staffing Beaver at staffingbeaver.com. You can hire a bookkeeper, customer service rep, porn girl, data entry specialist, graphic designer, inbound call expert, outbound call expert. We know what you guys are talking about.
Starting point is 01:19:24 A little in and out. You want an inbound call expert, in and out expert. We know what you guys are talking about. A little in and out. You want an inbound call expert, in and out? A little bit of the old in and out. You want to fill some holes. You want to fill some holes in your company. Call Staffing Beaver. Do they have a phone number? Probably.
Starting point is 01:19:37 What was those back in the day? The sex phone lines? Yeah. All right. So check out staffingbeaver.com and fill some holes in your company. Tell them you get a little discount, too. Oh, you mentioned that Yanni sent you, you'll get 10% off your first placement fee. Yeah, very nice.
Starting point is 01:19:58 Global talent is the hack to growing your business fast. Oh, so they get it from all over the world. So they'll get you some cheap labor out of Sri Lanka. Yeah. Make sure to follow them at Staffing Beaver on Instagram. All right.
Starting point is 01:20:10 All right. Oh, when reading our copy, can you display our Twitter page? They'd like, all right, Jesse, if he remembers it, he'll put it up.
Starting point is 01:20:18 And that's it. That's it. We'll see you next week. It's been a long day.

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