You Be Trippin' - Ireland w/ Greg Fitzsimmons | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

Episode Date: August 27, 2024

Follow Greg on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/gregfitzsimmons/?hl=en On this episode of You Be Trippin, Greg Fitzsimmons hitchhikes across Ireland and spends a few days in the hospital. He shares stories about writing travelers checks, giving away the only copy of his novel, and putting sausage in an old lady’s underwear. The two also talk about Mario Lopez, Billy Joel, co-ed showers, lesbians, and his Rogaine commercial. Other topics include: bad liberals, sweaters, The Troubles, and Danish girls. Also, this was back in the 80s so he only saved up $3000 for this trip. Have a Guinness and enjoy the episode! You Be Trippin' Ep. 29 https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir https://www.instagram.com/youbetrippinpod https://store.ymhstudios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Where you been and where you going? This is Ari's Travel Show, yeah. We're gonna talk about travel today. It's UB Trippin', yeah. Hello everybody, welcome to UB Trippin'. Wow, you're really good at this. Thanks. You just like, it's like something in you just turns on

and then. I was gonna, well yeah. Yeah, where is that always? It seems pretty fake, right? It's at least not me at all. We've been sitting here for an hour and a half just talking like human beings and then all of a sudden the camera comes on

and you're like Mario Lopez. Oh my God, I gotta do it again. No, go do it again. Hi guys, welcome to the podcast. Those at home, me and Greg are hanging out. That's the podcast with the most amount of hemorrhoids in the podcast scene. And every week we go on a different trip

to a different place and such. Hey buddy. It is weird when you, every time I go into a fucking hotel room, it's like Mario is my guest. You turn on your TV. Well, he tells you what movies are on. Oh really?

Oh, you never saw that? Nuh-uh. As soon as you turn on your TV in the hotel, it's always like, hey, I'm Mario Lopez. Get together for a couple of wacky vacationers. Charlize Theron. He tells you the pay-per-view movies. God, that guy. What a career he's had. What a career. She was just an actor and then he just goes to being a fucking hot guy.

Hot guy who, and this is not, I'm not spreading rumors, this is fact. I mean like Wikipedia facts. He went on his honeymoon with his wife and cheated on her on the honeymoon and she divorced him before they got home. Yeah. And he's like a devout Catholic. What? I mean, story tracks. Those Catholics, you can't repress. You can't. You can't repress people. This is what they're gonna do. I saw outside Montreal that strip club that we used to do that's not happening at. Yeah. Gets seedy right at like at midnight.

And we saw like a fucking Hasidic Jew dropping off a fucking hooker, a fat black lady hooker out of his car. Nice. Can't repress. Yeah. I know. a fat black lady hooker out of his car. Can't repress. Yeah. I know.

Like if you think about the people that are in open marriages and then you say to them, yeah but how often do you guys step out? They're like, almost never. It's because you're allowed to. Yeah right. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, do it, whatever. It's like one on one anymore. Exactly. Do they have the National Aquarium, I think, or the one in Baltimore, maybe they had one of the fish tanks and it said, do not touch the water on it. And it's like, oh. And then all the fish swim at you and you're like,

oh, it's piranha? Why would you give us the option? Yeah. And the sign is just, ugh. So you're saying Catholic priests are like piranhas? Oh, interesting. Yeah. And the sign is just. So you're saying Catholic priests are like piranhas? Oh, interesting. Yeah, maybe. Maybe. Yeah. How could you not cheat, though, if

you're that hot and chicks want to just throw themselves at you? You're not. It's not the same playing field. Well, that's why you shouldn't be allowed to get married if you're a ten. Nines and below can get married. It's unreasonable to have a 10 and be locked up.

To be a 10 and be locked up. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy, no way. No. Imagine if you think you're a 10 dude, but you're just like a rich guy with stockbroker looking good. I make $4 million a a year and then she's on her treadmill and she steps up next to some fucking half a billionaire

Yeah, see ya. Yeah No, no, no, my mom thinks you're a great catch, but we're done now. Yeah, right Yeah, that's why you and I we know our women love us Yeah, they're not with you for your fucking scalp. Nope. All right, Ireland. That's where we're headed. You're going to tell me about that? Yeah.

Where'd you go? What's telling me about the whole thing? Well, when I graduated high school. Okay. Oh, before even college. Yeah, it was before college. I'm so jealous of this. Every time I hear about a fucking 18 to 25 year old trip, I'm just like, forlorn. Yeah, it was before college. I'm so jealous of this. Every time I hear about a fucking 18 to 25 year old trip,

I'm just like, forlorn. Yeah. Well, I think my father had kind of a wild few years before he got settled down. So I think he gave me the advice to do this. But I got out of high school. I had no intention of going to college at all. So I graduated high school.

I started working at TGI Fridays. I was a cook. I I graduated high school, I started working at TGI Fridays, I was a cook, I was a line cook and then I parked cars during the day at a country club. So I saved up, I just remember I worked for six months and I saved up $3,000, which sounds like not a lot of money. No, it does not sound like a lot of money. Back then $3,000 got me, I went to Europe for six months by myself and backpacked around and came home with money in my pocket.

Yeah, youth hostels, hitchhiking. Three grand in Europe for six months. Well, it was 1984. Right, I guess so. Yeah, 20 years later, it'd be about a thousand a month to live low, low level in only Southeast Asia and South America. Yeah, this was very low level.

So I get to Ireland and I meet up with this kid. I go to Cork City, which is a great city in Ireland. And I meet up with this kid who's like, I got a buddy back in New York who's got a cousin in Ireland and he's like, oh, you gotta meet up with my cousin if you're going to Cork City. So I call the kid and he's like, all right, yeah, meet me at the court,

the bar was called The Courthouse. Yeah. It was across the street from The Courthouse. And I walk in and he immediately fucking knows it's me because I got a backpack on and I'm wearing a peacoat, And I walk in and he immediately fucking knows it's me because I got a backpack on and I'm wearing a peacoat. I'm wearing a peacoat in Ireland. And he comes over and he's like,

I can just see that he's got a gun to his head. He's like, how's it going, lad? How are you? He had no fucking interest in me. And he's in college. And so I end up drinking with him that night and in Ireland you go if there's if there's three guys then you each buy a round it's you it's just if you're with six people you're gonna drink six beers that night if you were

ten guys and they say if it's your turn they go the tides out lad that means you got to go get the drinks I love. So I drank hard with him that night. We hit it off. We end up, I stay at his house and I end up spending like three weeks at his house with his parents. What? And he's got like six brothers and sisters.

And then I was like, all right, I'm heading off. So he goes, I'm coming with you. So he takes off from school. What? Takes a break and we hitchhike over, we're in Cork and we're going through to Cary, which I think, and McCroon was the name of the town. Do you have McCroon up on the map? I don't know, McCroon.

So I think it's between Cork and Cary, M-A-C-R-O-O, no, N, McCroon. McCroon. McCroon. and Kerry M A C R O O no and McCrune McCrune and so you hitchhike and the thing is in Ireland back then is everybody hitchhikes oh there it is McCrume that's what it is and everybody hitchhikes so it is 41 minute drive it's not that bad but you hitchhiked that far? Yeah, we hitchhiked from Cork to McCroom. And yeah, so it's not that far.

But to get out of Cork, there's all these college students and they all go home on the weekends. And so they just, you line up and you get in queue on the way out of town to hitchhike. And it's like, you get up, you get picked up. And then the next day goes? The next hitchhiker gets up and they hitchhike. And's like you get up, you get picked up, the next hitchhiker gets up and they hitchhike. And people just kept picking you up?

Not every car, but in a rotation you get picked up and obviously the hot chicks get picked up right away. Not you, no. And so we get to, so we're heading, we're trying to get to Killarney, I think. And we only get to, we get, the ride we get is to McCroom. And we're like, what the fuck is McCroom? This is before there's GPS on your phone or anything. And we got a map out, it's not even on the map. And so we get out and we find an Airbnb.

It's just called a bed and breakfast. Yeah. And it's an old lady. And she's an old lady and she's like, okay, you have to be in the house by 10 o'clock tonight. And so we said, okay, and we go out and we get some fish and chips and then we find that there's a, they call them discotechs.

Like instead of nightclubs, they were called discotechs. And it's- That's how you spend Israel. Oh, really? Discotechs, yeah. Yeah. And they're just like, it Oh really? Discotheques, yeah. Yeah. And they're just like, it's just like a, basically a glorified, you know, pub.

And we go in. With dancing. With dancing. Yeah. And we're the only, we're the only kids not from a crewm in this town. And then they start playing Sugarhill Gang, and run DMC, and they're really into, and I'm from the suburbs of New York, but

I tell them I'm from New York. And then I start break dancing. What? Really? Not well. Well, I was a gymnast. I grew up as a gymnast. And so I knew I could do standing back flips. I could do back handstrings. I knew how to spin on my back. I could pop and lock a little bit. Yeah, I wasn't good. The popping and the locking, not as good, but the acrobatic stuff.

And so I could do it to the beat. What, like the spin? Like you could go down and spin out? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And so I'm doing that, and you gotta picture me in a discotheque in McCroom, Ireland.

I'm suddenly like a superstar. This kid's from New York and he's break dancing on the floor. And so girls are like, we're getting attention and we're hanging out with the guys and we meet these two girls and then we go back to their place and I'm with my buddy Teo, it's Theo, but in Ireland you pronounce it Teo. And we go back to their place, and you know, I'm 18, Teo's probably 20, and these girls are probably like 27. And so we go into their place, and I start fooling around

with the one girl, and then the other girl, like we're starting to get into it, which in Ireland is probably like, I was lucky to get some tit, you know? That was probably gonna be all I was gonna get that night. And then I hear screaming from the other room. Meanwhile, you know, I don't know what Tio's capable of. I don't, you know, what the fuck do I?

I just met him. Well, I've known him for a few weeks, but like, I've never seen him in the wild. I've never seen him in McCrew. I've never seen him in a croon. Action, action to you, yeah. Action to you. And so I go running in and she's screaming because he passed out on her bed.

And so she's freaking out because she can't wake him. And so. Just drunk? Yeah, can't wake him. And so... Just drunk? Yeah, he's just drunk. We're wasted. And so I'm shaking him and he won't wake up. And so she opens a window and starts screaming. And it's so weird.

She was like reacting to him falling asleep. And so these guys come up and they come in and we get into kind of a fight with these two guys. And so we run out and it was literally like a foot race. And then they like pushed us and they left us alone and we went back, but now it's like two o'clock in the morning and we go back. We can't get into the place. So we sneak in through the window.

And we get up and we get up the next morning and the woman's mad at us, but it's part of the deal. She's got to make you breakfast and and she's got a like a furnace like yours, your heater. But it's like from the 1940s. So it's big and she's got her underwear drying on the grates of the heater. Yeah. And they're thermal. They're like old lady underwear and they're thermal. And I remember that the bed and breakfast in Ireland, the Irish breakfast is like...

Oh, it's the best. It's the best. Yeah. Well, every type of pork you can imagine, sausage, bacon, blood pudding, which is basically intestine with blood in it. It's good though. It's great. And then they take fried eggs and beans and tomato,

and then they take fried eggs. With ham, right, like that? Yeah, and they just fry one side of the egg, but they burn it. See how it's got black on the edges? They burn the egg and then tons of butter and marmalade. And so we get that and then Theo, when they left the room,

Theo takes one of the sausages and he puts it in the, in the crotch of the underwear that are hanging off the heater. And now we can't stop fucking laughing. And she goes, what are you boys laughing about? What's going on with yous? And so we finish and then she finally throws us out. We're out on the street and we just stand in front of her guest house.

Just hitchhiking. Hitchhiking away? Hitchhiking away and this car pulls up and they pull over and we start running for the car and then Tio's so fucked up still that he throws up and the car just pulls off. It's like no way. It was like three hours later we were still standing

in front of her house and you could see her looking in the window, like, look at these. I was thinking, like, we're trying. That's so embarrassing too. Like, fine, lady, goodbye. Yeah. And the goons are probably looking for us

from the night before. What were they mad about? They just passed out. What a weird reaction. I don't know if Tio didn't tell me the whole story, but. Yeah, that's it. You know. Yeah, why was she screaming? She was just screaming.

He just passed out. Yeah. Did he vomit his own mouth? I don't think he vomited. For the next day. I don't think he pissed the bed, but. He did not, oh yeah, that would've been a bad one. Yeah, but yeah, look at that Irish breakfast. Oh, it's got it all labeled.

Friday, oh, mushroom. Soda bread, is that a thing? Yeah, Irish soda bread. Okay. It's kinda like a cake. My mom has a famous recipe that's been handed down for apparently like six or seven generations in my family, which is amazing, because I didn't even know

we had ovens going that far back. There was a famine, I don't know how we had an oven. Just like, hey, if we ever get bread again, soda bread's our recipe, remember that for your grandkids. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, my mom makes a really good Irish soda bread. It's got raisins and caraway seeds and buttermilk. Oh, hell yeah.

Was this your first time to us? So what else? The grilled tomatoes, yeah, that's always good. Better than you think it'd be the grilled tomatoes. Yep. Mushrooms. Mushrooms, which grow like crazy in Ireland because it's like, it's just damp and there's a lot of woods.

Yeah, black pudding, yeah, we talked about sausages. Yeah. Hash browns. This is very well marked for fucking breakfast, whatever this site is, I can remember. Yeah. And then pudding, yeah, we talked about sausages, hash browns, this is very well marked for fucking breakfast, whatever this site is, I can remember, and then butter, yeah, probably is. And then brown sugar in the middle. That's what that is?

Yeah. Interesting. And you're Irish, was this your first time to Ireland? It was, I was 18, and my grandparents, all four of my grandparents came over like steerage, like they came over on boats from Ireland. Yeah. Wow.

Why? Famine? They were all like, my grandfather, my mom's side was one of 13 and his wife was one of 11 and it was like, why are you still fucking? They had a two-room farmhouse. I found my grandfather's house. At nine, you'd be like, well, that's far past enough, right?

Right, right. Far past enough. Yeah. Why are you still fucking? What's the damage it can do? Well, look at the fucking, these refugee camps in, you know, in Syria, where they, people have fucking 15 kids. What is it about a refugee camp

that turns these chicks on so much? Yeah. I'm doing all this work for fucking nice art, and when you really get them to take their pings down, it's a refugee camp. This is art? Well, it's not here. I think that was that.

Well, it's because there's no fat chicks in refugee camps. No fat chicks. That's why there's so much sex. Yeah. You work up an appetite stabbing someone for bread. Hey guys, I just gotta break in real quick from this amazing pocket. What a fun time in this guy's life, Greg Fitzsimmons. But you know what else is a fun time? When he releases a stand up comedy special called You Know Me that's available right

now at Greg Fitzsimmons Comedy on YouTube. YouTube.com slash at Gregreg fitsimmon's comedy you know me the brand new long-awaited special from greg fitsimmon's one of the best in the business i'm not saying that lightly he has been one of the top comics for decades like three full decades people sleep sometimes on him because he's not a new name on the circuit, but he's actually fucking hilarious. He never fucking some of his best bits I've ever I remember those bits. I can't piss into a toilet without thinking of his bit about, you know, shitting on pissy water, pissing on shitty water. And he's just he's

great. He's great, man. He's also got a lot of tour dates coming up that I'm gonna read you right now Comedy works next week in Denver, Colorado best club in the fucking world August 29th 31st then September They got the mothership. It's already sold out the Montserrat winery and Temecula on the 21st North Pole ale house in Alaska Anchorage in North Pole, North pole Alaska. I'm sorry. Uh, the spur and Fairbanks, uh, Alaska Centennial center and Fairbanks. Wow. Fucking cool, man. Alaska trip. Um, and then in October, November, December, he's going to be in Tulsa Tacoma and finishing up December 5th through 7th,

the punchline in San Francisco. You can go to gregfit Simmons.com for all his tour dates. As for me, I got nothing to promote. I'm not going on the road anytime soon. Um, so I would just say, just subscribe wherever you're listening to this podcast, wherever you're watching. I've also got merch available on website, rechevier.com, uh, grinders, t-shirts, the new Jew vinyl that's finally, finally out. I saw one little misprint. I had to go back and correct it I spent a lot more money on that it's a deluxe double album that you guys are gonna fucking love head over to always for comm for that and

stay tuned for the outro where I'll do a sample patreon you'd be tripping patreon and read these posts I'm getting these postcards from around the world from listeners I read them on the patreon I'll do one for the outro for this anyway but that's it congratulations Gregford them on the Patreon. I'll do one for the outro for this. Anyway, but that's it. Congratulations, Greg Fitzsimmons, on the fuckin' special. It's the biggest moment in comics life. Guys, go over there right now.

Wherever you're watching, just stop what you're doing right now. Head on over, just Google, you know me on YouTube, Greg Fitzsimmons. Just quickly leave a comment. Just, just, uh, just leave a comment about it, saying you came here from this and in the outro I'll leave

you a or say I like those odds and later we'll see what that means. It's a fun part of the podcast. All right, let's get back to it. Just go quickly, leave a comment, help the algorithm, help everybody see the fucking special. Do that right now. Let's get back to it. Gregford Simmons in Ireland.

So where were you headed? Why would you go from one place to another? Were you just trying to see everything? Or were you going somewhere? Yeah, I was trying to see it all. I mean, I was supposed to only, I was gonna go for six months and I was gonna spend a couple weeks in Ireland

and then move on. But then I got there and I just fell in love with the country. Did you play golf at that time? I did, I didn't play there, but I played at the Salt Hill Golf Club in Galway, which is up more in the northwest. Okay.

And Salt Hill Golf Club, yeah. So did you feel like connected to it and shit? I did. Because of your name? I did. The second I landed, I was just like, these are my people. Really? Yeah. I got in, actually I landed in London

and then I took a train from London out to Wales. Okay. I think the town was Larnst or something. Boom, boom. Yeah. So we went out to Wales and then you take the boat from there over to Dublin. And then I got to Dublin and I got to a... What year was this?

Like 84. 84, okay. Yeah, and I got to the bed and breakfast and Ireland is very dank, it's very moist and so the first night in the bed and breakfast I had an asthma attack. Yeah. That was so bad that the lady that ran the hotel, she was a big tough Irish broad and she literally,

I was like hanging over her and she carried, like half carried me to the hospital and they checked me and they put me on a ventilator and IV and I spent like four days in the hospital I remember I read Kujo the book Kujo the whole book while you're in the whole book it's all it was nothing it there was no I don't think there was a TV in my room it was just like you know five I'm having asthma from being a fucking inbred? Yeah. Wow.

I mean, like we can't cure you, you're just fucked up. Yeah, and they gave me a lot of Irish soda bread. And the best thing was like in Ireland is socialized medicine. So I'm thinking, all right, my 3000 is gone. Like this bill is in, and they're just like, all right, thanks for coming, and they give me a bottle of pills.

And they're like, off with you. And that was it, not a dime. Wow. Yeah. Wow. What? Not even like a $10, a $15 copay? Nothing. What? Nothing. like a $10, $15 copay? Nothing. What?

Nothing. Just free food for four days? Yep. And a woman and a nurse who would come by like three times a day. She sucked you off? No, better. What?

Yeah. What is better? What's better than that? What's better than a woman who comes by three times and then just sucked you off? I would say probably twice a day. Three times like this last one's work. Twice one day.

Every day, it's just like we can skip. I don't need it on Tuesday. Yeah. That's like that old joke about like the winner gets three weeks in Atlantic City. Second place, two weeks in Atlantic City. Second place, two weeks in Atlantic City. And so she would come by, this nurse would come by three times a day and she would beat on me like I was a drum

to loosen up the phlegm in my chest so I could breathe. And she would just be like, pssst, pssst, pssst, pssst. And it felt really good and it felt very caring. That's nice. Yeah. Damn, and that didn't sour you on fucking Ireland? No.

It's been your first four days, five days, four to five. The same thing happened to John F. Kennedy when he went over there. Asthma. Asthma, went to the hospital. Cause it's so moist, damn, I don't recognize it as moist.

It's subtropic, technically. Because the Atlantic is coming off the West Coast. Yeah, like this way? Yeah, but then I think the other side of the country is. Sub-travel, what does that mean? I think the currents that are traveling. So it's moist in some way. Yeah.

Damn, okay, so you got to Dublin. How'd you find Dublin? I liked it, but I really wanted to be in the countryside. Yeah, Dublin's touristy now. Yeah, it was still like, you know, it was a big city. I liked it, but I really wanted to like do a lap of the country. So I went down south.

Just hitchhiking, this is so fucking cool. I assumed you would be told, I was like, he must've rented a car. No. Noiking, this is so fucking cool. I assumed you were told, I was like, he must have rented a car. No. No, 84 at 18, no way. No money, I just had, this was before credit cards, so I had travelers checks. So if they get stolen, they replace them.

It's so old, I barely remember. So if they get stolen, you can be like, hey, someone took my travelers checks. And then the whole time you must have been like, I should just fake lose these. Well, to use them, you have to sign them. But yeah, you have to show ID and you have to sign them to get them cashed.

But the problem is, if you're jumping from, like later on in the trip, I would be in two days in Belgium and then I would be two days in France. And so each time you go to a different country, you have to cash a traveler's check, which are for like 500 bucks or 100 bucks, and I'm only spending 50 to 100 for the day. So now I've got all these, this will be for the Euro,

so I have a pocket full of fucking French money, and now I gotta convert, and every time you change it, you gotta pay a broker fee. You lose so much. They tell you the exchange rate, you're like, all right, not great, but okay, and then they give you gotta pay a broker fee. You lose so much. Yeah. They tell you the exchange rate, you're like, all right, not great, but okay. And then they give you like a quarter of that. Yeah, right.

So you're trying to like very judiciously cash your checks. How do you cash a traveler's check? Where do you go? You have to go to a post office or a bank and you sign it and you show ID, your passport. God damn, what an old way to fucking go. No GPS, so it's all like, I had a backpack just filled with fucking maps

and you're like standing on the side of the road and you can't make reservations in advance. You don't even know if you're going that way or that way. No. Wow, you had no reservations. Yeah. God damn. How do you even get to a town, it's like so hard

to comprehend. You get off the bus or he lets you off. Yeah. And then we just find somebody. It was a book called Let's Go and it was a travel book. There was Let's Go Europe. There was Let's Go Ireland. Let's Go Italy.

And uh, and it would have, it would have like every town in it. And then you'd get to that town and it would tell you a cheap place to stay. It was like kind of like traveling on a budget. And so- Let's go to Ireland on a budget. Let's go Ireland on a budget, yeah. So it would tell you like a place you could get a falafel.

Oh, wow. And an inn. This is like Lonely Planet. But for only budget. Right. And so, so you'd get to town and you'd try to find that place.

You just, I mean, the best part was it made you interact with people because you were constantly asking for directions. And then people in Ireland would often like take you in or they'd take you there or they'd buy you a drink. And it was like- Why, cause you're just foreign? They weren't sick of Americans at this point.

Did you want to hear stories about America or they just like thought you were cute? Most of them sent relatives over to America in their past. So they had like this kinship to Americans who came over. Was there still hatred of English then? Oh yeah. Okay. This was during the Troubles.

So the Troubles, do you know about the Troubles? A bit. It's basically what Israel and Palestine has had is kind of like how Ireland and England. You guys fighting over the one bottle of sunblock? Yes. Yeah. Exactly. There's just contracted war

where there's generations of people that feel like, you know, look, you killed my brother, I'm not gonna forgive that. And they're feeling the same way. So. Harris Pete had a joke about Ireland. He goes, you know, there's racism and hatred all over the world, but in Ireland,

white Anglo-Saxon Catholic Christians hate the white Anglo-Saxon Puritan, or whatever it is, Christians. Just goes to show you, hatred finds a way. Yeah, yeah. Like they're exactly the same, Protestant versus Catholic. It's like you guys are both Jesus people. Well, but I think they blame a lot of, a lot of strife is blamed on religion when really

it's about real estate. It's usually countries fighting over real estate and they try to blame religion. I mean, that's probably, you could probably take the other side of that. What do you mean? I mean, there's a lot of other, there's a lot of people that argue that it's the religion, that it's the indoctrination, but I think it's economics. Well, the Catholics owned more of it, and they were like, so they were like a clan? No, the Protestants did.

Owned more, and the Catholics were like, fuck off. Yeah. Let us breathe. Yeah, I mean, the Protestants came in with their guns and their big army, I mean, it was the British Empire, organized, and the Irish were just simple fucking farming people. We've been occupied for 800 years. Damn.

Yeah. What's that thing of transpiring when they're talking about the Irish being better than them, because at least the Irish like fought back or something. I forget what it was. Yeah, yeah. They never stopped fighting.

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No rush itineraries, no nothing. Moorings.com, look into it. It could be really fucking cool. Okay, so. Yeah. So we get down, so we pull the map back up. So we head down and we get to, I get to Wexford, was it? Wexford, is that what that team is?

No, that's Wrexham. Wicklow. So we get to Wicklow and then Wexford, is that what that team is? No, that's Wrexham. Wicklow. So we get to Wicklow, and then Wexford is down below that. And you're just trying to see everything? Yeah, I'm trying to stop and- Oh wow, so you went south. Well, it was really, it wasn't like I was trying to see,

it was like I picked a direction and I hitchhiked, and wherever I ended up that night, that's where I would stay. Well, that's so fucking cool, because also like, you're just, you're not seeing anything in particular, you're just trying to see the country. Well, that's so fucking cool. Because also, you're not seeing anything in particular. You're just trying to see the country. Well, that's a beautiful thing about Ireland,

is there's nothing to see. There's no leaning tower of Pisa. There's no pyramids. There's no Eiffel Tower. It's just bars and beautiful green countryside. What month of the year was this? What time period? I was there from October until late December. What month of the year was this? What time period? I was there from October until late December.

What? Yeah. Wow. So it was kind of cold. It was nasty and it rains a lot. It's like a cold rank and it's kind of drizzling a lot and then it comes down in sheets. This in the summer seems like it'd be awesome.

Yeah. In November, December, maybe not so much. Yeah. And so I'm staying in different towns and then meeting girls but never getting very far. Why, is it so Catholic? It's so Catholic. Or you have no game.

I didn't get, no, I had game but I didn't get laid in three months, I didn't get laid once. And I was an 18 year old. Yeah, this was hair, Greg, right? I was not hard on the eyes. Right. Sorry, I was.

Pull up the picture. Of what, you? Do you have young Greg? No, I don't think so. There's gotta be. Young Greg Fitzsimmons. I'll be shocked. Well, there's some hair.

Oh, hey, there he is. Wow, and this is way later. That's in my 30s, yeah. What? Not bad, right? No, not bad. That's, okay, yeah, yeah, this is way later. Yeah.

Yeah, that's, when'd you lose it all? I was probably 29 in that picture. Here it's like, okay, beginning of the end. Yeah. And then here you've already started like frown and you cut off the top of your head on purpose. Oh, did we frame it wrong? I didn't even know.

You framed it wrong, yeah. It goes through such a frown for those last two. I think I had a head shot where I cut off my forehead. Happy with just a little bit left? Yeah. No, nothing. No. Yeah, you had a headshot where you cut it off.

Well, if you want to see something really funny, Google Greg Fitzsimmons and Rogaine. What? OK. When I was about that age, and that headshot that you just saw where the hairline's starting to go. Yeah. Rogaine Add?

Yeah. Rogaine Extra Strength is proven to work for four out of five men. I like my chances. Rogaine has extra strength and it's proven to stop hair loss or regrow hair. Rogaine Extra Strength proven to work. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha It's so like, well, it turns out, you know, one out of five is a real number. They didn't mention that fifth guy with Dr. Fauci. He got everything right. It's so confident. Look at that, yeah. Could have gone the other way. Yep. So my agent calls me up, I'm like 29 years old, I'm getting ready to move out to LA,

my agent calls me up and he goes, hey I got a commercial for you. And I was like great. And he goes, it's for Rogaine. And I go, yeah but my hair's not really falling out. And he's like, yeah. So anyway, the offer, he goes- You can see it right there.

It's like that big crown. Anyway, it's like, well, let's not talk about that, but the offer is, it's like- So he's like, I was like, look, man, I'm about to move out to LA. I wanna do some acting. Pilot season's coming up. And I don't want to be known as the Rogaine guy.

He's like, dude, this is going to run on like ESPN 6 at three in the morning during Korean women's badminton. Don't worry about it. He goes, you'll make like $40,000 because it was like five ads. 40 grand, health insurance, take it. And I go, I don't know. He goes, nobody's gonna say it. So I take it. I shoot it. I move out to LA and then March Madness starts and it's running on March Madness. Every one of your friends sees it. I get my answering machine is fucking flinching.

I like my chances. Strangers, I'd be walking on the street and guys would be like, hey, I like my chances. It's so fucking dumb. Man, I like my chances, only Rogan. Maybe that's what I should my chances. Only road. Maybe that's what I should call my special. I like my chances. I like my chances.

So confident for a guy who knows about the go bald. I've been watching the old Sex and the Cities. I'm starting to watch them. There's such a bad show. Yeah, it's so bad. I'm starting to understand like there's two characters that are really just sketch actresses and not like they're not actually you shouldn't care watch them. It's such a bad show. It's so bad. I'm starting to understand like there's two characters that are really just sketch actresses and not like they're not actually,

you shouldn't care about them. But it's so interesting to watch it knowing the redhead chick is a lesbian. Oh, interesting. And so when you watch it with that knowledge, which means she was always a lesbian. That means she was a lesbian then, right? She didn't become one.

So, and then you're like, she's so mean to men, and you're like, oh right, she's a dyke. She's fucking hating this attention. She's not attracted to anything. Of course she's cranky. Yeah, wow, she really plays this subtext well in this series. She knew what they were gonna turn her into

in fucking the reunion show. I like those odds. Who is a lesbian? I just saw a lesbian do a sex scene. Oh, okay. Who's a lesbian? I just saw a lesbian do a sex scene. Oh, fucking, did you watch Bad Lieutenant? You don't watch TV much. No, I watch like shows though. Bad Lieutenant, or not Bad Lieutenant, True Detective?

I saw some of the latest one though, last one. The one set, yeah, so there's a scene where Jodie Foster's having sex, like hard. No, really? This guy is pounding her into the wall in the bathroom. I think the bathroom is somewhere. But it's like up against a wall, and you can't, and I hate to say it,

because I'd like to think that gay actors can play straight characters and vice versa, but when you're watching her. Ah! Yes! can play straight characters and vice versa, but when you're watching her... Just so people know, the Google is gay anal sex. Nothing more creative than that. Look at the guy on the right. He's taking it up the ass and he's also stroking himself. Like, give it up for the other guy. Wait, where? Is this gotta be all about you?

On the right. Oh, this one. The big one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's gotta get some. You gotta take care of yourself even now? That's too selfish. It's so moist, it's so exquisite. What have I done?

Oh my God. Just a couple of guys hanging out of your apartment at 1115, they're getting some gay porn. Okay, so you're just going from city to city, this is so fucking cool. So what do you do, just go to bars and go to those fucking seats and bars and stuff? Yeah, you see sessions.

So every bar would have a session. Almost every night. They'd be just people come in with a fiddle. Somebody bring in some drums, somebody have a guitar, somebody have a flute, and they would just play traditional Irish music, which I knew pretty well because I grew up in a very Irish family.

My grandparents used to sing Irish songs, and my grandfather would recite Irish limericks. So you could sing along with them? Yeah. It was those standards. Yeah. Wow. Is this the kind where there's no speakers?

It's just them playing, so if you get kind of far away, you can barely even hear them. I mean, it's twice the size of this room. And there's a fireplace going, and you got a pint of Guinness. Did I get a Guinness right now? How trigger would you be if I drank a Guinness while you talk about bars?

Do it. Are you cool with it? No, go ahead. What do you mean? Like I'm not in bars every night of the week? Excellent point. So, yeah, so a pint of Guinness, and I was under the illusion up until we went

to Ireland last summer and I was under the illusion that Guinness had more alcohol in it than regular beer. It's crazy. It's crazy. Doesn't make any sense. Yeah. Yeah. What is that ball in there? What is that? Why do they have that? That's something to do with the carbonation. Everybody says that, it's not really an answer though. So you just drink and go to these places and just hang? Go to these places and you just sit down at the bar. And Tia was cool with it too,

he would just hang with you? Well this is before I got to court, so this is when I was on my own. And you'd sit at the bar and I'd put bread in my jar and say, man, what are you doing here? What, say that again? I was singing the piano, man. Oh.

I was like, none of that makes sense. Some of Billy Joel's lyrics are just so incredibly great. And then some of it is just the worst. You know? I love you just the way you are is one of the most subtle beautiful love songs ever written. And then Uptown Girl, you've been living in your uptown world.

It's just saying the same thing twice. What does that mean? Yeah. Where how's to go? Uptown group, Uptown world. I'm just a downtown guy, man. That's what I am. Oh, here we go.

I bet she's never had a back street guy. I bet her mama never told her why, but he's going for it. I'm gonna try for an uptown girl. She's living in her white bread world. Aren't you white bread? Yeah, what does that mean? Billy Joel. You're a backstreet guy?

Yeah, that's always funny when guys call themselves like backstreet guys. That's that's good. Yeah Yo, did you go to music school in your backstreets? School of hard knocks and when she knows what she wants from her time and when she wakes up and Makes up her mind She'll see I'm not so tough just because I'm in love with an uptown girl. Wait.

Oh, I get it. So he's a downtown. He's downtown, he's trash. Yeah. They did not have that version of New York anymore. Like, where do you live? Uptown. Greenwich Village.

That's the expensive place now. Now it is, yeah. And Uptown is all the black people. Way, way Uptown. Well when you say Uptown, when I think Uptown in New York, I think of Harlem. Oh wow. That's, I, it just goes blank in my mind after like 98th Street. It's just like, it just faded off in a fog. Why would you be up there? Harlem does rule now.

It's gotten nicer. And black people love gentrification there. Do they? Because they own the buildings. Yes. So it just raised their value when whites moved in. Thank you, Bill Clinton. He resold it to him?

He, I don't know if he re-soled them, but he brought transrification to a whole new level. I think he had offices on 125th Street. Oh yeah, they went up there for like their library. Yeah. Okay, back to Ireland. All right, so then I go to, so then I get to Skibereen, which is in Cork.

So are you, you're picking a direction, south, north, whatever, and just going there. Are you using the sun to be like, well, it's gotta be that way if the sun's right? Well, I was kinda using the Let's Go Ireland book was my, that was my, but it didn't have a lot of information. Like for one city, it might have one page for all your information.

So you're kinda figuring it out, and then you'd run into other backpackers and then they would say, oh, there's this great place here and they'd give you the number of somebody in that town and you'd look them up and it became like a network. That network is so cool and helpful. Yeah.

Yeah, where you're just like, oh, I had this awesome thing, you should go there. The best was, I was in my fifth, I spent the last month of the trip in Greece, and I was getting very low on funds, but I had just enough money to, or at the time I had enough money to buy a ticket to see, I'm a Bruce Springsteen fanatic,

and ever since I was a kid, I loved Bruce. So now I go over there and somebody goes, I have one ticket to see Bruce on the 4th of July on the Born in the USA Tour in Wembley Stadium in London. I was flying out, not making this up, July 5th, I had my ticket home from London. And I had a Ural Pass, which, do you know what a Ural Pass is?

Yeah, where you just get to go anywhere? You could travel anywhere in Europe for free. And so I bought a one month pass, but then it was paper, this is back before anything, it was laminator, it had photos on it or anything, and so you take a razor blade and you just lightly go over the number and you change the date.

And so I just changed it so I got a six month Ural pass. And so I'm in Greece and I basically went from Greece, you can take boats and trains. And I made. On Ural? On a Ural pass. So I was on the beach in Greece and then I took the train across Europe, got to London, went to Wembley Stadium and saw to this day the greatest concert I've ever seen in my life. Like four hours. What? Wembley Stadium, Born in the USA tour. Wow. Flew home the next day. Wow.

Got to the airport, called my mom from Newark, and I was like, hey mom, I'm home. And meanwhile, we didn't really talk much on the phone because it was so expensive from over there. I would talk to them once every month or two. I was like, I'm home. I was like, come get me. She's like, you just hitchhiked all around Europe.

You can't get home from Newark? So I hitchhiked home from Newark airport. No you did not. Yep. Did you really? Well I mean I live in the suburbs, it took me an hour. What a different time for black people. Oh.

Oh. This is such a cool fuckin' trip. Yeah, and so. Did you, and you never fucked the whole three months? Nope, nope. Damn, what was your favorite places? I loved Kenmare, cause that was, see in the bottom left, Kenmare and County Kerry?

That's where my grandfather, no that's Consell, Kenmare just up from there. I see it. Yeah, so that was a sleepy little town when I got there in 84. It's gone, it's now like a very sought after tourist destination, but it's got some beautiful old buildings. It's just a beautiful little town

and it's on the Kenmare River. And so I got there and I rented, and I had this idea that I was going to write a novel. So I rented this farm like there was a barn behind a farmhouse and there was no heat. There was just peat which is in Ireland. That's what they do for heat is it's basically like dirt. It's like dirt bricks. And you try to light it on fire, which is very hard to do,

and it gives off almost no heat at all. And that's your heat for the house. So I'm there in November and it's pouring rain and I'm trying to light these fucking peat bricks. And then I was going down into town I'm trying to light these fucking Pete, Pete bricks. And then I was going down into town and there was a place called the Atlantic Pub. I don't know if the Atlantic Pub is still there, but I would go down there

and there was a girl named Molly. That's the Wickelo. What do you think the odds are that it's here? Wait, put in Atlantic Pub, Ken Mare. You have- Oh, Ken Mare, okay. What are the odds it still exists? Who knows? This is a lot, this is...

Oh yeah, Ken Mare. Does this bring any memories? That's it, that is it. Really? Yep. So she was a red, she had dark, curly, thick red hair. That's me, there's the Rogaine. And she, oh my God, wow. So I would sit at that bar every night.

During the day I was writing this novel and then I would go there at night and I'd flirt with Molly who was the bartender. Hot redhead. Hot redhead with green eyes, sparkling green eyes. And she would, you know, she'd, I'd buy a pint, she'd buy one back and we'd hang out and then I'd sometimes make out with her.

And I'd always ask to walk her home and she would never let me walk her home. And so I just, and I stayed there for like, I must've been there for a month. And the farm was like a pretty good walk from town. It was a couple of miles from town. And you'd walk down like, it was like a dirt road in the rain and I, and that was,

but every night I'd come in, I'd get a bowl of soup at the bar. They have like, you know, like like beef stew, yeah, like that. And then I'd make out with her and then I'd be drunk and I'd go home and I'd try to light a fire. And so after about a month, I finished the, it wasn't a novel, but it was probably like 70 pages. Really, what was it?

Did you ever do anything with it? It was called Evergreen. No, here's the thing. I was so in love with her that I wrapped it in gift wrapping and I gave it to her. And I said, I want you to read this, and it said dedicated to Maggie, and I gave it to her. And then I see her the next day and she goes,

it was fucking brilliant. And the thing is, in Ireland, brilliant doesn't mean what it means here. It just means like, like your shirt is brilliant. Or that pizza was brilliant. And so, but I think it's brilliant. And so I didn't have the heart to like ask for it back. So I just, she just kept it as a gift.

I fucking love 18. I know. What a dumb, I can't. Yeah. Not even a hand job. Just. What a dumb fucking young age. I know.

When I was probably 15, I went to get the Heart, new tape from Heart, the band. But I was like, do you have the new Heart record? That's what they're called, like the album. And he just got me a record, it was when I was splitting records and tapes. But I didn't have a record player, but I was like, ah. So I just bought a record, an unusable record,

because I couldn't say like, oh no, no, I meant tape. Eh, right, right. Babyless range. You're a fucking novel back. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah, I know. Just because you don't want it to be awkward.

Yeah. But I also, yeah. It's also like, I hadn't really felt love. Like I really felt like, and part of it was just, it's also like I hadn't really felt love. Like I really felt like, and part of it was just, it was pretty romantic time and when you're alone at that age, you really feel things like so much like exponentially stronger. So whatever I was feeling for her, I really felt.

Yeah, goddamn yeah, what a fucking time. Plus, I mean you must have been in sort of love before, but it's never like that. I don't think I ever felt anything like that before. God damn. Yeah. And then I went back, so this would have been in 84. I went back there.

Last year? With my girlfriend from college. So that would have been in like- Three years later, four years later? Yeah, about four years later, I went back and we got to that town and I was traveling with my girlfriend and I asked for Molly and they said, oh, she's up North this weekend.

She's not around this week. She was still bartending there. And I said, well, she's up north this weekend. She's not around this week. She was still bartending there. And I said, well, what's she doing up north? And they said, ah, she's getting married, so she is. And I was like a part of my heart. Even though I was with this girl now, my heart just, because I didn't want my current girlfriend to know how much I had riding on seeing Molly again.

Yeah, you couldn't let her know. That's actually such a dick move to even go there. You're with a woman on this romantic trip. I know. Let me just check out this chick I used to hook up with that I'll care about more than I'll ever be able to care about you. That I put out an effort from the heart for her

like I will never do for you. I wrote her a novel. I wrote and gave her the only copy of a novel. I mean, what a fucking gesture. Shouldn't you print this up? No, babe. Yeah. Wow, I mean, this reminds me a lot

of the season finale of season two of Sex and the City where Carrie goes to meet Big at her engagement wedding and the chick just has to sit there as she's waiting to talk to this older, cooler lady who's like, oh, you're a fucking ex? The one I met, you just broken up with her? She's a fucking sex columnist for the Times. She's so cool.

And I just have to sit there in the car while you talk to her, she touches your face. Anyway. Wow. Is everything in life a metaphor from Sex and the City? Dude, I'm loving watching this because anytime I'm around a woman, I can just claim one of the episodes

I watched the last couple days. And then be like, how do you, yes, I do remember that episode. It's the dumbest fucking show. The writing is offensive. It's all wordplay, right? A ton of wordplay. And they don't have the fucking, they don't just trust you as an audience member to like fill in the

gaps. Yeah. Then she's like suddenly the fucking lesbian is like she's like I'm a huge Yankee fan just this episode. Yeah. And then they go oh this guy's the new Yankee. I'm like say his name or position. What an odd thing to say. Yeah. The new Yankees here, here he is. The new Clipper. And then in case you don't get it, Carrie then does voiceover at the end of the show to make sure we can sum up what you just learned about.

It's all about playing ball. Some of us catch and some of us pitch, but in the end, aren't we all just enjoying a day in the park? And that's just like that. Cut to cut to you an hour from now, watching it again. That's such a fun eight watch. It's so dumb. We went to see the movie. Me and my friend Mike Dugan, our wives both wanted to see the movie.

So on on Valentine's Day, we took them to the premiere of, I don't know if it was the premiere, but it had just come out, the Sex and the City movie. And we went in and we sat down and we're like, all right, we're taking one for the team here. And within 12 minutes, I leave, and I'm just literally standing out front in the lobby and he comes out and I was like, you done?

He's like, yeah. And we stood out there for like an hour and a half and waited for the movie to be over. Yeah. Yeah. That's fucking great. Yeah, it's just like, this is just time place for them. Yeah.

Get more girls, sopranos for fucking, if you weren't into it, the Italians, get it on a different level. Yeah. Get more girls, sopranos for fucking if you weren't into it, the Italians get it on a different level. Right. Did you do anything else besides just bars and restaurants and just like hitchhiking around? Did you go hiking or did you go like? Yeah, I went hiking and I went out. There's these islands off the West Coast. If you go up the coast, called the Aran Islands, which further up. Did you see that movie, the Banshees of Inisheeran? You didn't like it. I mean, just tell them you don't wanna hang out.

You don't have to cut your fucking finger off. But that's where, wait, if you go left at Galway, wait, scroll down a little bit, see Galway set in. Yeah, off of there, keep going straight out to the left, those islands. These? Yeah, I think those are them, those are the Aran Islands. Wow.

So that's Inishmore, where we went this summer. Wow. I took my whole family, my mom and my sister and her family. Do they have these cliffs out there? Yeah, that's the Cliffs of Moor right there. No, wait, but the Cliffs of Moor aren't on the island. Oh, okay, no, then that's one of the Aran Islands. It looks just like the Cliffs of Moor right there. No, wait. But the Cliffs of Moor aren't on the island. Oh, okay. No, then that's one of the Aran Islands.

It looks just like the Cliffs of Moor. Yeah. Damn. This is all pirate shit right here. Yeah. It's staggering, isn't it? Cliffs of Moor was like unbelievable. Oh, you went? I went after... It wasn't after Edinburgh. It was on a European tour and then it was like,

okay, do Ireland, but I had a day off. So I went to, instead of flying to London from, from maybe Glasgow or something, I flew to, where is it? Cliffs of Moor Galway? Just south of where you are. County of Clare, Ireland. Okay, yeah, right here. Cliffs of Moor. Yeah County Clare, Ireland. Okay, yeah, right here.

That's a better. Yeah, and then I drove to Dublin and it's really not that long a drive. No, it's not. And I went and took side roads the whole way. Oh, cool. Every time Google Maps was like five minutes slower, you know, and you're like, oh, no way.

I was just like, okay. Cause I had like two days to get there and it was like a six to eight hour trip. It was so fucking cool. Went to Boston, just discovered these towns. I get what you're saying. And like some of those like pubs are just like, this is quaint as fuck.

Fucking thick pie, thick meat pie. Listen to that fucking, that scene. And there's no barrier of entry to conversation with anybody in the place. You can just sit down and they'll just start talking. Not in an obnoxious American like, hey, how you doing? Just more like, that's your soft night.

If it's a light rain, they go, soft night, thank God. Soft rain night. Yeah, soft night, thank God. That's so cool, that's so cool. That's so cool. You can so cool. It's so cool. You can't do that anymore with cell phones. No. They're just like, I'm all busy myself.

Yeah. That's so fucking cool though. They got a dog at their feet. The grand kid is sitting back there. He's 12, he's got a Coke. You know? Yeah. It's like multi-generation sitting around and listening to the same music with the fire going

and it's a soft night. When I was on Australia, my Airbnb was like, the recommendations book of stuff. And they go like, here's a cool bar, the best two coffee shops are here. And then if you're up for it, the local is like a block and a half from here. It just meant like the local bar we can eat and drink,

but they have good food. And it's just like, oh, you guys go here like four times a week. That sounds like those places. Yeah, well, I mean, that's the kind of thing that was nice about that movie, even though you didn't like it, was that, you know, that's your life.

That fucking pub is your life. Which is nice if you can leave it. I mean, I guess it becomes a living hell if you live on an island and those are the only 12 people you ever see. God, that must suck. I maybe go like, well, you don't even know what's possible. Yeah.

That life could be better every single where else. Right. If you grew up in like Manhattan and then moved there, it'd just be like, eat lead. Yeah. Yeah. But it is stunning, these cliffs. You went there during this trip?

Yeah, we went to the Cliffs of Moor. But anyway, on that trip, I went out to the Aran Islands and I spent a couple nights. What'd you get into there? Nothing, just a lot of hiking. You did? Yeah. It's a cheap thing to do.

Inishmore, yeah. Did you go from spot to spot, like, island to island? No, I just went to Inishmore. Okay. And bought a sweater. That's where you buy the famous Irish knit sweaters. That's where they, that was where they made them all back there Yeah, yes, they're called Aaron's Aaron Island sweaters or

Called Aaron sweaters just wool Yeah, but it's a wool that you can smell the goat on it because they leave they leave the the the Wool oil on it. It's called lanolin, I think. And it's got this special smell in it and actually whisks the wicks, the water off. So you can wear it in the rain and you don't get wet. Cause it's like a fucking sheep. It's like wearing a sheep.

Damn, that sounds awesome. Yeah. So you got one there just taking around with you so you don't die of asthma. Yeah, I got that, wore that nonstop. And then, I don't know, I guess. How'd you got one there just taking around with you so you don't have to go out that far? Yeah, I got that. Wore that nonstop. And then, I don't know, I guess. How'd you get out there? Boat?

Yeah, you take the boat out from Galway. How much were the boats back then? Not a lot. Restrictive or not really? It wasn't a lot. It was probably a couple bucks. Wow. And then I went up to, I hitchhiked up to Belfast.

And this, I was starting to tell you is during the trouble. So the trouble started like in the late sixties and they went up until like the late eighties. So was this, this was still the UK or had they split it up yet? How was, how was that? Well, it's still the UK to this day. So, okay.

So you see that. Was Ireland then part of the UK? The Northern Ireland is part of the UK. But back then it was the same as it is now. It's the same now as it's as it's been for hundreds of years. So the trouble was in this area where they like get the fuck out. Yeah, the trouble is down in. No, the South is called the Republic of Ireland.

And then as you go up towards Derry and Belfast, that's where the troubles were. And it was essentially like when the IRA started to, it started off with basically like the civil rights movement in the states caused the troubles to start in Northern Ireland they started to see that you know that uprisings could do something oh wow and so they started to protest and then the protest turned violent and then they sent in the the British sent troops in

and they started to really abuse the Irish and then it protest turned violent and then they sent in the, the British sent troops in and they started to really abuse the Irish and then it just got entrenched. And then they fought back and then fought back and fought back. So when you were there, was it like no trash cans? There was armed, you know, Wow.

machine gun guys walking down the street with machine guns, the cops and the troops. Wow. And they used to come onto the bus, you'd be on a bus and the troops would get on with a machine gun and they'd walk up and down the aisles. Every time you went in a store, they'd check your bags for bombs.

There's bombs going off all the time. And then you'd take the bus, I sense like a lot of buses, but that's how I got around. And if you took the bus through Belfast, it was an area called the Falls, which is where the Catholics were. And when the bus went by, the kids would throw rocks at the side of the bus, just all day, just fucking whipping rocks.

And they would just take it? That's Israel, that's the same as Israel. Just graffiti and rock throwing, and that went on for 40 years. Wow, that is the same as Israel. There's places you would go on a bus where they'd have the bars and the windows because they're gonna pelt us with. Right.

And you're just like, I just got to my fucking cousin's mom's house. Yeah. Well the Irish, the Republican Irish, Irish Republican Army helped train a lot, you're not gonna like this, but they trained the Palestinians. Well they teach them how to rape. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha a lot of rubble to use it. Yep. Blow shit up and then take the rocks

that were caused by the car bombs and throw them at the other cars. I follow this Instagram account, but also just like it's a website, Popular Front. He just covers under-reported wars and like skirmishes and shit. Oh really? Yeah, he won't take ads,

because he's like, I don't want anybody telling me which ones I should cover. So he just does a Patreon. But there's always videos on there of people like taking a vacuum cleaner and like throwing it in a cop car where there's a full when the cops like we're not doing it we're just trying to get out of here right now and they know it and they're just like fuck it pounding on the windows they know they'll get no trouble yeah which countries it'd be like Belarus but then

it also be like Spain or France during like something more recently that you like barely hear about. Right. Or Palestine, Israel or some protests in Berlin over Palestine and Israel. Right. Yeah. It's fun to watch. And then you like walk outside and you're like, no, things are great here.

Yeah. Yeah. Fire. There was one that was like this like tire fire in Paris as these people were like drinking wine and like looking At it like a half block away at a cafe. It was fucking Paris man. They're nuts They gotta have their wine. Yeah Yeah, I guess it just becomes a part of life, you know, you think about how tough Russians are Yeah, you know just your typical fucking Brighton beach Russian immigrant. They're

the, they're the toughest fucking. Yeah. They just, life has no meaning for them. And they got here. Yeah. From just a fucking tough country. So they were the toughest ones because they got the fuck out. Yeah. Yeah. Those are the ones who got here. They didn't give up and fuck it. All right, fall in line. Right. I heard about this, one of the chicks from Pussy Riot when they got out of like, Serbian prison. Yeah. So one of them came to LA or whatever,

was like, fuck that, you know, fuck Russia. And the other one's like, no, I still like Russia. Masha? Something like that. And she's like, so she stayed. And then like, started like, trying's like so she stayed and then like Started like trying to like lead protests. Yeah, like are you nuts? And they were about to rest there again that she had like in the middle of night takeoff. Oh really? Yeah One of them is like really beautiful. Yeah

Maybe that's her maybe it's her pull it up, let's see. Hottest pussy riot chicks in order. You put up hottest pussy and I already started searching. You had eight million hits already. Images of the pussy riot. Her? Yeah. Nadja. Yeah, Nadja.

And she did nude stuff. Wow, the rest of them she did like nude stuff. Wow, the rest of them honestly look like Portlandia. Yes. I mean for real. But Nadja, look up Nadja nude. She did, yeah they did like a movie. Pussy Riot nude. Is that?

Yes. What? Yep. That's like full Is that? Yes. What? Yep. That's like full penna. Yep. What? I don't think. Is it a movie as an art piece?

Yeah. Oh right, because it's an art collective, it's not a bank. Right. Wow. I love when art just becomes porn. Why is this fucking nuts? How do you apply for the fucking clown roll? What's on her belly button?

Is that feces? No, I think it's caviar. Oh yeah, caviar makes more sense. Damn. Weird puss. It is a little weird. It's left of center. Like her politics. It's like out in the air.

I would love to see a woman like that be like one of those TERFs. Just like, we need freedom, we need everything, but these fucking trans women are not real women. They're a little different than us. I love seeing the line. There's this new game somebody taught me where you have to go around a party in LA or anywhere and just go, what makes you a bad liberal? And you have to say one thing that makes you a bad liberal. And some people will like half ass it.

But some people are like, ah, or anything kind of a no judgment zone. And then it opens up a bunch of people start going like, yeah, I don't think whatever. I don't think Louie did anything wrong. Or like, but like, seems like Gaza started it. Just like little things like, or like, as of like before, where it's yeah, I don't think whatever, I don't think Louie did anything wrong. Or like, seems like Gaza started it. Just like little things like, or like as of like before where it's like, I don't feel like Joe Biden's not really with it, you know, just little things. Like, she's not supposed to say that.

Yeah, and by the end of the night, it's like, I can't be in a pool with black people. Ha ha ha ha. Conservatives can play too, That'd be another way. Yeah. Yeah, what makes you a bad conservative? I feel like some gun control is in order, right? Like, yeah.

I don't know, maybe three weeks into a pregnancy is okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just call them they if they want to be called they. It's not that big a deal. I mean, it's not even an extra syllable. It's not even a, yeah. I just call them they if they want to be called they. It's not that big a deal. I mean, it's not even an extra syllable. It's not even a, yeah. All right, so hold on. So back here.

So you took the bus into, up to Belfast. Belfast, yeah. I have a friend, Paul Curie, he's an Irish comic. And he's a puppeteer also. Yeah. Wild. Oh yeah? Yeah, he's so he's so good but um

How did he learn puppetry? He started as a puppeteer and but he said he said he this Arrogant Edinburgh was all about like doing your own thing and not live in the shadows of everybody He said Frank Oz went to Belfast cuz all the Muppets whatever Jim Henson corporation would go to like war-torn places To try to like cuz he goes from where there's war, there's art. So they would seek out, because they're like artists, you know? Jim Henson and Oz. And so they would go there,

and like Belfast definitely applied. So he's all these people showing up, doing their fucking whatever, and he just, Frank Oz just watched them doing their puppets with each other, he goes, you guys still got it. We don't have it anymore in LA. You guys are like doing the real shit.

Wow. Yeah, but he was like, it's fucking war torn. You can feel it there, huh? Oh shit, yeah, it was intense. And it was very like, there was a line, there's a road. I think it's Falls Road, I'm not sure, but like if you're on one side of it is Catholic, the other side is Protestant, and there's barbed wire walls.

No, really? Yeah. What? Yeah. Where did you go? Checkpoints. I went to both sides, I took the bus across. Because you're Hindu?

Because I'm Hindu. Because I'm a self-loathing Irishman. And. What do you got? Oh, I don't really go to church much, so. Honestly, I didn't even know it was that bad up there, because I was just kind of going. A barbed wire fence, like Berlin. Yeah.

Wow. You were just going to check it out? Yeah. Damn. What'd you think when you got there? I mean, it's beautiful. It's definitely, it's a beautiful part of the country, but I was really like shaken up.

Like it was really, I'd never been in a militaristic area before. Wow. And now I kind of think of like just parts of this country that have gotten like that. You know, you really feel like, wow, this is like fucking scary. Like homeless areas? Yeah.

Like Portland, Austin, Portland more. Right. It's funny, they always- Austin. Austin's bad, right near like downtown, sucks. Right. It's funny, I hear like, I'm not in the news, but I hear talking points are like,

the liberal cities are falling apart. And it's like, because you know, we travel a lot. And it's like, it's every city, just most cities are liberal. But the conservative cities are also falling apart. Anything over like 600 people has like 20 methods. Yeah, yeah. Go to Biloxi, Mississippi. I'm sure things are not real rosy downtown.

Club in Missouri, Springfield, Missouri. We were doing a tour bus me and Renazzi see and and O'Neill and We parked there and some guys like looking at so you guys in a band. We're like, no, no We're just whatever but we parked next to the club and this guy was like skateboarders They all started to get off. He goes. Hey, you shouldn't park here tonight It's like 16. We're like what it goes. It's not a good place and Then it was like all the homeless people were just walking from like shelter to like, I don't know, where they get food stamps or whatever. No shit. Or where they score.

Then we just got out of there and went to the- So is Beth Sywen like the- The locals like- The local like skateboarders that are warning you about the real trouble. Hey man, you seem like a nice guy. You don't wanna be here. Yeah, it's like a fucking bad, yeah, Stephen King movie.

Right, right. Damn, that's crazy, barbed wire fences and stuff. Yeah. Did you feel like in danger? Oh, totally. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, and I stayed in a youth hostel there. Yeah.

And I just remember there was like a shower and it was coed, it was the weirdest fucking thing. Yeah, like I went in one day and I've got my stuff and I open up the door and I walk in and I see a naked woman and I go, oh, I'm sorry, and I close the door and I walk back and then the woman comes out and she's like, no, no, no, you come.

And she was like Scandinavian and she invited me back in and like, there was like just, you know, men and women. And I was like, this is so fucking random. Yeah. Yeah. And they were just like, that's fine. We don't care. Yeah, it's fine. You didn't get laid three months. Yeah. And they were just like, that's fine, we don't care. That's fine.

You didn't get laid three months. No. Did you get laid when you got back? No, in the rest of Europe I did. Oh, okay, okay. Denmark was the next stop. Denmark was crazy. Danish girls are the most equal women to men ratio of anywhere I've ever been.

That is right on the nose. The women there are strong. They know their sexuality. Yeah, yeah. And then she's like, I bet I drank like, I guess this can be year round. What do you mean? They're not like, you gotta buy me out.

Yeah. And I slept with this girl who was very attractive. Nice. And I was, thanks man. And because having dark hair actually means something up there because everybody's like blonde. Yeah. I had green eyes, you can see my eyes.

Yeah, look bluish. Green. And so I wrote in my journal, I had sex with, Latte was her name, short for Charlotte. I had sex with Latte last night. She's beautiful, but not that good in bed. I write that in my journal and I'm staying at my friend's house and she was a friend of his.

And so I came back one day and she had read the journal. I didn't know that at the time, but like we had sex again. And I thought it was over. I thought it was like a one and done. She didn't seem like she was that into me at all. And all of a sudden she was fucking me hard. And I was like, what the fuck is going on? She goes, you think I'm so good in bed?

And I was like, no, now I do. Now I think you're awesome. You've really proved your point. You really stepped up your game. I'm glad you look at your Yelp reviews. Yeah, all right, listen, you're using the critique. Wow. Yeah.

Did you go to this lake? What is this lake here? Right off Belfast? What country is this lake here? Right off Belfast? What country is it? Oh. Where's Belfast? Oh, is that a lock? Belfast, yeah, it's a lock.

Yeah, they call the lakes locks up there. I'm sure there's a lot of bodies buried in that lock. Yeah, probably, right. So there was, is it one of those where the trash cans were all gone? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. Like random, like almost like a movie set,

like fires and stray dogs and, you know. What did your parents say when you got back? Did they have questions about it? Had they been there? No, they got married there. My parents got married in Ireland. Oh. And, yeah, both their parents were from Ireland.

And did you go from Belfast to just leave Ireland? Was that like your last? Belfast I went back to back to London and then from London to but then you left Ireland after that. Yeah, then I went to Amsterdam and then did you make any friends in Ireland? Oh yeah. Teo is still a good friend to this day. And he stayed around with you that whole time

for the rest of it? I've been over there, I've hung out with him. You're still friends with him? Yeah. Wow. Yeah. That's so cool. We were trying to hook up last summer when we were in town and he was planning on driving up, he's got kids now, and then he had to cancel at the last minute,

but yeah, we keep in touch. Wow. Yeah. Fucking cool. Yeah. Fucking cool. Yeah. Fucking 35, 40 years later. I know. What? Total soulmate.

And then he came over and then I went back, I don't know, probably 20 years ago. Yeah, my wife was pregnant with my son on one of our trips and we hung out with my son on one of our trips. And we hung out with my friend Lisa, and she's an American woman who, I'll tell you her name off the air, but she's like, she worked for Comedy Central

and I was good friends with her. And so she happened to be in Ireland at the same time as us. So we went out to dinner, and it was Tio and me and my mother and my wife and I guess the rest of my family and then Lisa and Tio met and they just clicked and they start flirting and then they start talking on the phone and I'm living in LA and all of a sudden like

a couple months later Tio's like calls me up he's like hey boy I'm coming out to Los Angeles I'm like for what he's like uh just to see you I was like what the fuck are you talking about and so he flies into the airport I pick him up I drop him at Lisa's house and he spends the entire week with Lisa and then she goes over and stays with him. And then they were like falling in love. I think they were gonna get married. And then it broke off because basically he had family in New York and she came to visit him in New York

and saw how Irish men treat their women. And like, everybody finished eating and the men all sat there and smoked and the women all got up and they cleared the dishes and they did the dishes. And then the men sat and they watched sports. And she was like, I just couldn't see myself as one of those women in that kitchen.

And it kind of was over. She was like, I'm out. Wow, wow. I mean, out. Yeah. Wow. Wow. I mean, smart. Yeah. Get out before it's too late. Don't marry an Irishman. That's the moral of that story.

Dude, this rules. Did you, were you able, when you got back after this whole long trip, nobody ever talks about these, so you're gone for three months through Europe? No, six months. Six months. Oh yeah, 3000.

How was getting home? Do you remember anymore? I was homesick. I was a teenager. This was hard. It was fucking work. The thing is, people think traveling is a holiday. Isn't that resorts are holidays?

Traveling, like again, no credit card, maps, no reservations, fucking changing money in different denominations and getting scared you're going to get jumped and meeting new people. And you know, I didn't have like social skills. I was kind of figuring it out. So when I got home, I was so like, I was so homesick. By the time I got home, I was so homesick. By the time I got home, I was just so happy to see my buddies again. There was a girl that I was kinda dating

and all of a sudden I'm hooking up with her again and it's steady and my mom's fucking cooking me meals. I'm sleeping till noon. I got my old job back at TGI Fridays cooking. Life was good. Damn. Yeah, there was no reentry problems at all. Oh, that's cool.

Damn. Yeah, you must have missed your mom's cooking and stuff. Yeah, yeah. Did you get any fights the whole time? I mean, the mixture of you and anywhere. Trying to think of any fights. Were you a big fighter at that point? Did you have the Fitzsimmons rage yet?

I got in a fight when I went back with that girlfriend that I told you about. We were staying in a youth hostel and this guy, we got drunk and then this guy started hitting on her and I got into a fist fight with this Irish guy and the lady that ran the youth hostel kicked us both out.

Kicked me and Cindy out and that guy out. Which was awkward because we had just been fighting and now we're like out on the street. Shark hub. Yeah, yeah. And I remember we had to go into town and we had to spend a lot of money on a hotel that night. Yeah.

I'm trying to think if I fought during the rest of that trip. I don't think so. You were just nice to everybody you met. Yeah. I'm trying to think if I fought during the rest of that trip. I don't think so. You were just nice to everybody you met. Yeah. There was a Moroccan guy that I got in a shoving match with because with the Ural Pass, you'd always try to sleep on a train. Like we took an overnight train from Paris to,

I can't remember where we were going, but like, you know, you get in one of the sleeping cars. But it wasn't like a sleeping car, they were like cars, and they were like benches, and you'd try to sleep on them. And then these Moroccan guys used to come in, and they'd wait till you got to almost at the train station, and then they'd grab your bag and they'd jump off.

And so this guy grabbed my bag and I woke up, and I grabbed my bag bag and then we started fighting and then he jumped off the train at like, you know, three in the morning and whatever town we were in. Almost lost everything, my whole pack. Fuck. Yeah. That would ruin your trip.

I know. Had my fucking journals and pictures. Oh, that'd be the worst part. When I was in, when I went to Asia and I was always scared of someone's gonna take my stuff, just every once in a while I'd call myself, I'm like, you're fake poor, you're not actually poor. As long as you have your credit card,

you can just buy new stuff. You just, no one will know and it'll just go back to fake pouring. But what if you lost your passport in your credit card? I don't know, that's a good question. Did you have a backup credit card anywhere on your person? I think I did, but I think it was in my bag. So I had one in my bag, one on my wallet.

But like if they just took everything, or if like a hostel burned or something, yeah, what the fuck would I do? I'd have like 20 bucks on me probably. And then like, how the fuck do I? Fuck. I'd have to find a phone somehow or an email. You get an email saying, I need money, send money.

Cambodia, please send money. Like, no, no way. Fuck off, nice try. I'm like, no, no, it's real this time. Just at least a hundred dollars. Don't go crazy. fuck off. Nice try. I'm like, no, no, it's real this time. Just at least a hundred dollars. Don't go crazy. I have an aunt who was like a big, big fucking Republican and a real nice lady, but she's

talking about America. I was like, it's the only place where you can show up with like, you know, 10 bucks in your pocket and turn into a millionaire. And then I heard it was the first time I heard that as an adult. And I'm like, you'll be dead in a week. What are you talking about? You have three hours to get a job. And if you don't get a job that first day, okay, a slice of pizza at the work is a dollar. That's one day's meal and one slice of pizza.

You're fucked as soon as you get all dirt on you. You're not getting a job. How is that gonna work? As opposed to like a village in Nicaragua where they would just kind of like you'd become part of the Community. Hey, do any work for anybody? I'm strong hands. I'm willing to work. Yeah, sure here rake. Here's a fucking pence Yeah Yeah, like what what is this? Yeah, it's so funny to like rehear the lies I told the states miss said that about George Washington was like they told us we were children that our first leader was literally

Incapable of line. Yeah, he physically could not do it and we all just bought that I know get 12 year olds. Shut up. All right, no way. Yeah He could murder he could murder. He could murder, he sure could murder. He murdered a lot of people. With his gout tooth. Damn, this trip sounds fucking sick. Yeah, I'll send you some pictures.

You have pictures? If you wanna post them on this. You have pictures? Yeah. From then? Yeah. Oh yeah, I'll put them all in the video. Oh, that'd be sick. I mean, nothing's gonna top the Rogaine ad,

but I'll send you some pictures. Yeah. It's so cocky, it's not even like, I tried it. It's not even like that. Trust me, guys, it's gonna work out for me. I like my chances. Let's just say this. I like my chances. Let's just say this.

I like my chances. All right. This is what I ask everybody to. This did make me want to do exactly this trip. I heard I remember Lewis Gomez told me if like these podcasts, I should say if like it makes me want to do it. I want to do this exact. Even though I did it from here to there, I do now want to around. It's just like, I did this at Great Ocean Road in Australia

where I was just driving, I had these plans, I'll get to Apollo Bay the first night, and I'll do this hike and this hike, and then halfway through I'm like, oh, I'm not gonna get to the hikes, I'm definitely not getting to Apollo Bay. And they're like, fuck, but now with Google Maps, I'm like, all right, hotels within 30 minutes,

when the sun goes down, I guess I'll just stay here, and it's all fine. When you have eight days to get somewhere, it's like, it's such a fucking freeing thing. Like anywhere is the right town. But getting off the phone adds so much more to that because you could be anywhere and be on your phone, but to be someplace where you have to ask for directions,

where you're forced to need, well you know what brings people close? When you need something from them. I gotta ask ya. I gotta ask ya and now, yeah. Even if it's just hey, which way's whatever, which way's Greenwich Village, which way's like is Chinatown that way?

Then you have to interact. And you have to help them. When like is Chinatown that way? I did this yesterday. I'm like yeah, yeah, just keep going down. You'll hit it. Feels good, doesn't it? It does.

You're like, I wanna help. I gotta help someone. Cause at first you're like, oh, I do know. Hold on, yeah. Three blocks, lady, you're almost there. And you're like, I did it. You're like a superhero. Yeah, just to have to ask people

and then like, what are you doing here? Must be like a cool. It is fun when people are like, what the fuck are you doing here? Must be like a cool, it is fun when people are like, what the fuck are you doing here? Yeah. You're from New York City and you're in fucking Nowheresville. You're in McCrune, break dancing.

How do you know about us? You're like, I don't. You're in this book, but. Yeah, but it was funny too, cause it was like a 1950s kind of like, the guys are all going, who's the new guy in town? The girls are like, he spins on his back. Oh yeah, I'm sure you'd be like,

where's a second one getting jumped? You ever get robbed almost that one time? But no, never like. I think it's the only time I got robbed. Oh no, well, when we were in Greece, when we were in Athens, but nope, never like. It's the only time I got robbed. Oh no, well, when we were in Greece, when we were in Athens, Athens is, if you're gonna get robbed in Europe, it's likely gonna be in Athens.

And we stayed in this. Gypsy crap. We stayed in a youth hostel, and I remember we were out, and our bags were there, and we came back, and like half the youth hostel was empty. Like I think it must've been like an inside job. And like half the knapsacks were just gone and ours were not.

Really? Yeah. Prime suspect. Right. How come yours are here? They're like, don't you think we'd also steal our own? Like that's what you want us to believe, of course. Yeah, I got travelist checks I can't cash

because I don't have the passport. The locks, you have to put locks on your thing and you're like, but it'd be easy if you have a clipper just to get through this little cage. You're just hoping they don't. Two questions. It's where else you want to go and also if you have any travel tips in general.

In general travel tips. I'd like to go, I was just saying to my, I was at dinner with my wife and her mother and her boyfriend. Sicily, I've never been to Sicily. I just read a really good book by an Irish author named Rob Doyle. I can't remember what it's called, but,

and it's about about he's a teacher in Sicily and I just think that Sicily would be, it's fucking huge by the way. Look at how big Sicily is. Yeah it's like a quarter of Portugal. It's pretty fucking big. Look at all that. It's about the same as all that down. Definitely bigger than Israel. It's a little bigger than Israel. Yeah. Wow.

I'd like to go. What do you wanna see there? What do you wanna do there? What's calling it? I think I'd just like to, apparently there's like beautiful churches, there's like amazing tile work. Like a lot of the immigrants that came to New York back in

You know the early early part of the 20th century were Master tile workers from Italy and they were mostly from Sicily really and that's why you see so many of the the trades the the unions in In New York was a lot of Italians because they knew how to do tile work. Really? So they came up with that? No. I love seeing how like just the quickness of like how a culture like gets together. And the Irish became cops because they could fucking beat people up. We had the same just as yeah exactly you guys are good at fucking oh give me a club. Clubbing no rules.

Just waving that stick around. Yeah. Act like a big man. Right. I got a problem with authority. I get to be authority. Yeah, I'd like that. Oh, that's right.

By Malta. I almost went here for COVID. No shit. We went to Ecuador, but we were narrowed. We narrowed it down to cities that were good on COVID. So like Brazil was out. I mean, countries, Brazil was out. Who wouldn't quarantine our dogs?

And then who would take Americans? Which was a very low list of who would take Americans. I didn't realize that. We had one of the least valuable passports during that time. But, and then, yeah, we didn't have to quarantine our dog. And then it was like Prague, but I'm like, I'm not going there in the winter. But Malta was definitely the small island in Malta.

Wow, that looks amazing. Yeah, it would have been like fucking cool. Maybe here or, there's two islands, am I wrong? Oh yeah, here it is. Oh yeah, there you go. Yeah, and going up there, but then we're like, are we gonna take a fucking shuttle to a flight if we wanna get home?

My friend was just like, I wanna go to Indonesia. And he's like, really? He's like, you know, cause I always wanted to have like sex, try having sex with like a lady boy, I guess they call them over there. And I was like, yeah, but you don't really need to fly across the world. Like I'm pretty sure there's like websites

where you could find one in like 20 minutes. It's like, I don't know, you kinda, I feel like I wouldn't feel guilty about doing it there because it's such a part of the culture. Have you been to Thailand? Thailand, yeah. Is it part of the culture? Have you been to Thailand? Thailand, yeah. Is it part of the culture there? Yeah. It is.

They're not looked that weird. And they are fucking vultures. They are like, what's that small dinosaur in Jurassic Park? They got you with just one, but it's like, oh cute, but it's like there's 50 of them. If you start trouble with a lady boy, they all attack. Really? Yeah. They all attack and they are fucking vicious.

So it's like, you think like, I'll just beat up some like light looking man. And it's like, no bro, don't. Yeah, it's part of it. No one looks down on them. They're not like derided. People will correct you like it's trans, not lady boy. Like, no, they go by lady boy.

So I'm gonna respect that. Were you tempted to try? Yeah, I tried. You did try? Yeah, I did try. How did it go? I couldn't go through with it. But I found a hot one.

How far along did it get? I got to the door. Oh, you couldn't even go in and make contact. I choose you, let's go. And then as we got to this, it was just like, my body froze up. But there was this, it was just like my body froze up. But like there was no, it was a hot woman. It was not just like a passive for a woman.

I mean like an attractive woman. How did you picture it would go down if you would have? I guess it'd be like I'd probably butt fuck. Definitely a blow job. You would get one or you would give one? Get one. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I picture like fucking them.

Yeah. I know not like milk in their little fucking shriveled nub. Today's trans, they fucking keep their hog, but those they take estrogen and shrivel up their nub. From what I've heard, I don't know. I did get a lot of hookers out there, but the one lady boy, no one, I got one hooker out there, but the lady, I just couldn't go through with it.

It was real, it was distressing for me. But it wasn't anything to do with her. No. It was all to do with you. Homophobia. She seemed comfortable with it, she didn't feel exploited or anything? No, she's working for a living. Yeah.

Yeah, like no, no, nothing like that. Like what do they call it? Fetishized. Yeah. They're like, I guess, who cares, it's part of it. Yeah, it was just my fucking, yeah, bigotry. So do you have regrets? Do you wish you had gone through it?

Yeah, I wish I would have. It's a hot woman. And I believe in like trans. I don't think it's like a made up thing. So it's like, what's stopping me from hooking up with a hot woman? It should be nothing. Yeah.

The dick, sure. But like, it shouldn't be a problem. That's a woman's dick. Do you pay her anyway? I don't remember. If I had to guess by looking at my life, I'd be like, no way. Yeah.

Except those other lady. Yeah, if she was like, no, no, no, you gotta pay. They're like, oh no, of course I was gonna pay. What are you talking about? I was just going out here to use my wallet. All right, what about travel tips? Travel tips? Yeah.

Could be as broad or as specific as anything. So like travel light, somebody just told me like put mushrooms in granola mix. Oh, that's good. I would say when you stay at a hotel, I like to sleep late. If you go in the closet, you can always find a hanger that has the clips for your pants. Take one of those hangers. You know how there's always that slit in the curtain?

You clip at the top, you do the two clips on the curtain and you seal it and you'll have blackout curtains while you're traveling without having to pack anything. That's a great tip. Yeah. Especially for fucking jet lag where you're going to be awake till one. Yep.

Sleep till one. And then put it back in the closet. You know, don't make the maid do it. Lee, here's the other thing. Tip your, tip your, are there male maids in hotels? I've never seen one. I've never seen one. I've never seen one internationally. Isn't that weird?

Internationally I've never seen one. Two jobs, a man. We gotta let the women in the military, right? We gotta let the women in the, That's what they're telling us. Where's the male maids? Where's the male maids? There's male men?

Yep. There's no male mates? That's right. There's no male nursery school teachers. That's for damn sure. That's for damn sure. Never seen one. No. You're right.

Yeah. There was, when I was in high school, I remember a story that they fired a female construction worker because she was too hot and Everyone else stopped working. They were just looking at her all day and accidents were happening and he had a fire and she was suing for Firing with no cause and I remember they were like it's an interesting case because Work was not getting done through no fault of her own but because because of her. So like the guy had to fire her. And then he's like, I can't, where nothing's happening while you're here. Whatever I have to pay you out, I will recoup in.

I'll go under if I have to hire you. These guys are animals. They're just like this and get hit by a fucking, you know, one of those. Those are good tips. Tip your maid. Tip your waif, tip your maid. Tip your maid. What do you leave them at the end?

I give them. How much do you give them? I give three bucks a day. Which doesn't sound like a lot. Everywhere? Even in like shitty places, third world places? Oh, especially there. Especially there.

Three bucks a day when they're making three a day? I mean, what's it to me? True. It's three bucks a day. True. So if I spend Thursday, Friday, Saturday in a hotel, I'll leave, I'll usually leave 10 bucks. 3.33 a day?

Yeah. Right, how much do you leave? Generally? Yeah. Zero dollars. Are you serious? No way! I have clear change off the thing before.

No way. If they are exceptional, meaning almost always, if I leave my weed out and they come in and one time Montreal tidied it up, not only didn't take it, tidied it, that's a tip. Okay. For keeping your fucking mouth shut. Now what about you're at a coffee shop,

there's a line of people watching, do you leave a tip for the person who is? Baristaing me? Yeah. Always leave a dollar. If you and I a coffee shop, there's a line of people watching. Do you leave a tip for the person who is? Yeah, always leave a dollar. If you and I are there together, probably two because you're looking over my shoulder. Yeah. Yeah. If a woman is with me, yeah, for sure. Yeah. I go straight to the 25% not 15. If anyone's there looking, but we're both in agreement that it's obviously that, but now we have to do this because of fucking peer pressure yeah I went to what do you do you go higher when someone's watching here's what I don't do no I'm pretty consistent here's what I don't do and I want to do a joke about this but it's absolutely true I was at

like a CVS or a Walgreens and they hit you with that shame thing where it was like at the end do you she says it out loud, do you want to give a dollar to the Childhood Diabetes Foundation? I go, is this the company that has candy, candy at child's eyes levels, as far as you can see? I remember when CBS stopped selling cigarettes and they were like, what? And they're like, yeah, I mean, we're a pharmacy.

Yeah. And people are like, how are you gonna make a living? And they're like, I don't know, but we shouldn't be selling cigarettes. Yeah. And then they all, I think they all stopped. Wow. Yeah, that's a good joke.

Yeah, there's something there. Yeah. Once again, Greg Fitzsimmons, I'll put it in the beginning. Um, new specials out on YouTube right now. I wanted to announce it. I'm very, I'm very excited. This is actually the first pie, even though I know this, we've pre-taped this. This is the first podcast that I've been on. We did this a day before. Oh, we did? Sure. Okay. No, I, the Mark Normans one just came out and they were like,

he said he was engaged. He got married a year plus ago. I started these so long ago while I was figuring it out They're like what the fuck Kevin Ryan did one like he no he has a nice car now. He says he has a fucking Corolla No, he doesn't Well, the rest makes sense This is the first podcast I've come on That's what we're gonna say. This is the first podcast I've come on in preparation for putting out this special, and you gave me a lot of good advice,

which is gonna help me a lot, and I appreciate that. Be Jewish is what I said. Be Jewish. Have a rich uncle. Ride coattails. What's it called again? It's called You Know Me. You Know Me. What's it called again? It's called You Know Me.

You Know Me. Yeah. Okay. That's great. Filmed at the mothership. The mothership in Austin, Texas. And, uh, you didn't use a backdrop. You didn't change the backdrop at all?

No, we brought in some lighting. I think the backdrop is nice. Yeah. You're the first one to it. Yeah. You're the first one to it. So, so, uh, Simpson also did one there, but he changed the whole thing. He changed nice. Yeah, you're the first one to it. Yeah, you're the first one to it. So so Simpsons also did one there, but he changed the whole thing He changed it. Yeah, but it was like only one guy gets the shot at using that backdrop and it's you Yeah, yeah, I text you cuz I was scrambling

I was like trying to work shit out my special. Uh-huh. And I was like, hey, did you use the normal? But then I saw like a video like fuck. Yeah, yeah, it's over Cuz I was like I just do this quick. I just film it Yeah, and I was like, fuck yeah, it's over. Because I was like, I can just do this quick, I can just film it. But then I was like, now we need a whole fucking set design now, so congratulations. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, I'm very proud of it, I'm excited

that it's coming out finally. It's been, as you noticed, I tried to film this a while ago and it didn't work out. Good for you for dumping it. So we dumped it and we started all over again. Good for you, a lot of people just put it on a bad special. Yeah, no I couldn't. I'm just too proud, I've worked on this material

for a long time and it's that joy, it's like, part of me is like really proud that I have this stuff that I've worked on so much and then there's another part of me that's just like, I am ready to let go of that and move on to the next material. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you been writing new stuff?

Yeah. That's nice. Well, I got that whole chunk about diabetes and Walgreens. Yeah. You ever get terrible advice like, try Target, it might work better. And you're like, you're a fucking idiot. Shut up, get the fuck out of here. You're a fucking idiot shut up get the fuck out of here You're a fucking lawyer, yeah, I did comedy for a couple months back in 87

Yeah, and so I know I was a stand-up New York's funniest lawyer in New York Contest that one makes me the maddest over anything someone who has done it someone who's never done it I was like I can see how you'd be too dumb to know yeah someone who did it and quit to tell a professional Current comedian right that you know more than them Mm-hmm What's it called again, you know me you know me on YouTube Greg Fitzsimmons YouTube Yeah, Greg Fitzsimmons, and then fits dog comm is my website I guess and fits dogio is the podcast.

Sunday Papers is the other podcast. Boom. There it is. Yeah. Look at that. Let's ignore these. What is it? Okay.

This is what you'll be doing. I think I just added some too. Back at the comedy mothership. Yeah, back at the comedy mothership. Okay. North pole. This is what I'm most interested in. North pole ale house.

Come on. Come on. Oh, here it is. North pole ale house in North pole Alaska. The spur and Fairbanks. There's not even a link. Oh my God. I think my website person couldn't even find a link for the gig and the Alaska go to the spur, go to the spur, go to the spur and then Bricktown and Tacoma, both great clubs actually. Okay, the spur's on sale. Wow, $25 tickets. How much? 25 bucks.

They get 10 grand a year just to fucking live there. Yeah. So easy. Bring 40 friends. Are you gonna go to the Fairbanks Ice Museum? You gotta. That seems redundant, doesn't it? You gotta.

The Ice Museum. Here's like a Circle Ice. This one's more of a square pattern. Oh, and there's South Fairbanks in case it gets cold. You can go down to South Fairbanks. Yeah, congratulations. But as good as it gets, no, fuck, why do I have a block on this?

I mean, I'm hopefully they're yelling at me now. What's it called? What? What's your special? Oh my God, really? It should be duly noted it's now 12, 30 in the morning. Yeah, fair. It's called You Know Me.

You Know Me. Yeah. God damn. If you are watching, there'll be a little box that pops up right now, just click on it and watch a special and tell everybody about it. Leave a comment on it. Yeah, that'd be nice.

Here's something we should do. We do this for every podcast. You find out where they found out about it from. So you leave a comment, which shows you where it came from. Oh, that's good. So it'd be like, Danish girls are the hottest which like shows you where they came from. So it'd be like Danish girls are the hottest or what's her name?

Latte. Latte. Yeah. Yeah. Something about latte. Put your comments on about latte. Right. Or what else?

Iced latte because it's Denmark. Iced latte. Yeah. Okay, well use your imagination there, guys. Fitzman, you're one of the best comics in the fucking world. Thanks, man. So I'm excited to put another special.

I quote your stuff so much, so many times, it's just, it comes up in natural conversation. Anytime I see a Fiji bottle, like you own that idea in my head now, anytime I see when I piss on shitty water, and I would shit on pissy water, but it's like, I can't, I think of you so many times when I'm shitting, when I flush before I shit.

And it's like, you own that part of my brain. Thanks man, thanks for the kind words, I appreciate it. Yeah, everybody go watch now. Gregford Simmons, thank you very much buddy. Thanks man. All right. Well, that is the episode everybody. Thank. Gregford Simmons. Thank you very much, buddy. Thanks, man All right. Well, that is the episode everybody. Thank you. Gregford Simmons everybody go right now To a special at Gregford Simmons comedy on YouTube You know me is the new special

It's fucking amazing. I've seen him run it. It's fucking hilarious He is always hilarious if you're looking for I know there's a fucking flood of specials on YouTube, Netflix, HBO, Hulu and Amazon and everything. And it's hard as a customer to know what you should be clicking on harder in time off and you don't want to click on something that might not be good. This ain't that this is the highest level of standup. He's Greg Fitzsimmons, man. We all look up to him. We all look up to him We all look up to him his joke writing is on par with with anybody in history

He's the best so go over there right now and have a fucking great time Grapefruit Simmons fucking congratulations on your new podcast And you do special excuse me So, let's do this right now everybody this episode has been produced by your mom's house network edited by Alan Caffey expertly Thank you I'm gonna do a you be trippin patreon if you want to help me subscribe to patreon.com slash you be trippin Three times a month I put out a new episode a lot of them are with these postcards you guys are sending from around the around the globe I'm loving them send all these postcards to you be trippin 151 first Avenue number 49 New York, New York

1003 it's only for postcards and very thin letters. I am getting postcards I'm filling up the fucking back wall the patreon something just fall no patreon studio I am getting postcards, I'm filling up the fucking back wall of the Patreon... Did something just fall? No. Patreon Studio, where I cut these, I go into different details about places. It's fun. It's fun. You should come along. And I'm using that money to send someone, one lucky person, not necessarily a Patreon person, but just somebody, around the world. I want to send them on a one-year trip to see the world I want to send him a one-year

trip to see the world on our dime on the patreon you be tripping patreon's dime the old patreon they are sure when is dead alright so here we go this is from the Jose Mareal Velasco Museo Nacional de Arte what was my last go estado de Mexico 18udad de Mexico, 1912, Cathedral de Oaxaca, 1887. Oh, it might be an architect. So here's the picture. Put it in post!

Thank you, Alan. Wow, where the fuck is that? I've never seen that. Look at the mountains behind me. I think that's Mexico City. I heard Mexico City is in a valley. I've been there twice. It is pretty great Let's read it Ari as I write this I am in Panama okay waiting for my visa to go to Venezuela. Whoa cool legit traveler

Also when you're writing these, put the fucking insert in. My advice, put the stamp on first and then write them because some of these stamps in some of these countries are fucking massive. This one he sent when he got home, clearly USA Forever. But some of these stamps take up a massive amount of space and then you like run out of space I get it it's a postcard it's not much space I

get it I send postcards to my mom and stuff I send them they're fun you run out of it's not the the cool part and the bad part is it's not much space so you run out you run out of things but also you're not obligated by much Joey Diaz when he calls me, I take his calls. People don't call a lot anymore. Joey Diaz calls, you take his calls because it's gonna be under two minutes. What's up, cocksucker, just checking in, how you doing?

Why are you ignoring me? I called you yesterday. Two minute conversation, done. If you're in the middle of something like, hold on, Joey, this will be done soon. It won't be a long, sometimes when I walk home from the cell late night, I'll call Matt Edgar, David Taylor, Tony, any number of people, just to shoot the shit.

I've got a 30 minute walk home, I'll talk to you while I'm doing it, then I'll walk around and around, talk an hour, just to talk. Joey Diaz, it's in and out, take his call. Joey Diaz is the postcard of phone calls. As I write this, I'm in Panama waiting for my visa to go to Venezuela. Damn that's fun. It's fun. It's a fun part of travel

to wait for your visa somewhere. So I was in okay East Timor there's a there's a island nearby. Let's see if I can find it. I took a ferry. Look at this ferry ride. Okay open the maps. Look at this ferry ride. Okay. Open a maps. Look at this fucking ferry ride. I took this. I have, I mean, I'll have a bit about this. I try to write a short story about it, but it was so long. It was the worst ferry I've ever taken. I started in East Java. No, where's Bali? So I started there in Bali. I was done, hooked up with some chick from UCLA. Very hot, very fun week.

And then I was going to Lombok. So I went from Bali to Lombok, which is the island next to it. Lombok's where surfing is and stuff like that. I mean so is Bali, but it's a way more quiet island It's really cool And I went to Kuta Lombok who to Bali avoid that at all costs fucking way overrun Kuta Lombok is Just called under surf there Good memories there. There was a tree that fell down, blocked the road on the way back from surf lessons.

The guy who was giving me surf instructions, his cousin or whatever was selling weed. It was the worst weed I've ever, even for Australia. Nah, Australian weed is worse. But he was like, check this out. And then it was just this brand, I'm like, bro, are you, I grew up smoking in California, in LA. This is crazy that you're showing me something

you're bragging about. You have, that's garbage. Like, it's smoked on a hilltop with a bunch of people from Seattle, we had a great time. Anyway, so I was taking the ferry, right? So I'm in Couta down here. I asked the guy, like, how do I get to, how do I get to where the, I wanted to go see the Komodo dragons.

Where's Komodo? That's where I'm gonna be here. Yep. And I was like how do I get there? He goes, you should fly. You should fly to Flores, which is here. Flores. East New- yeah.

Yeah, this whole thing is Flores. Okay. Maybe it's a region or something. Indonesia is an island country and they celebrate their islands the way America used to celebrate their colonies. He goes, you should fly. And I was living like a backpacker and I'm like, what's the other option? He goes, take a ferry. And I'm just like, okay. He goes, the flights about an hour and a half.

The ferry is like four hours. I was like, I'll take the ferry. It sounds so cool. Nah, you want to take a flight. And I'm like, I get it. You think I'm a fucking American traveler. No, no, I'm living the hostile life I can do a ferry. I want to take it. All right We went on a trip that he took me charged me double what he's agreed on and he made me pay for gas

Around here to the ferry missed one ferry had to wait 13 hours for the next ferry just at the dock Then we got a ferry we got on a bus and I'm like how we get on a bus I gotta do a longer version of this we got on a bus that drove on to the ferry the ferry drove us to here to I'm sorry we're on Lombok to West Nusa Togura got off the book like oh we there like no we're in West Nusa Togura. Got off the bus. I'm like, Oh, are we there? Like, no, we're in West Nusa. What? Soon as we get on the bus, by the way, I want to sleep. And they're like, no, no, get off, get off. You can't. Um,

then we drove all the way through some Bawa, all these places, right, right, right, right, right. And this took fucking 14 hours. And then I'm in the end of Sambawa which is right here where's the ferry from gonna be from here I thought it's from over here on this right side I might be wrong though and then that we had to get another ferry which I said it was all-inclusive it was not all inclusive finally just said fuck it I'll get a hotel room negotiate with the guy so I just want to sleep for hours because here's how much a hotel I'm gonna go no no I just want for four

hours it was not the price of the price like bro I might use it for 24 music for four okay becoming half price took a ferry all the way to Flores and that took fucking 15 hours met some cool people out there. They were talking about like chartering a boat and everybody there signed up a Belgian guy, an Italian guy, an Italian woman, who's one of the best travelers I've ever met in my life. Um, this German scuba diver guy and his chick, not his chick, but some friend he had. He also had a had a also had apps for the constellations

and we're on a boat, middle of the night, he just exploded, he was like, I went to the top. This guy was a real fucking explorer. I'm sleeping in my bag, because I don't want it to get stolen. Like everyone's out in the decks. I mean, it's dingy, bro. He goes, a top top, no one's up there.

Because the other people are just there transporting goods and stuff. We're there for travel, no one's up there. Because the other people are just there transporting goods and stuff. We're there for travel. Pitch black up there, see all the stars. I was like, why do you wanna impose and be a third wheel? Oh, this is my friend, we're not doing shit, sexually. But he was like, the moon's gonna rise in two hours. Moon doesn't rise the same time every day. And we like waited on it,

waited on it, all these beautiful stars. And then just a straight horizon. And then he goes, it's happened. It's 10 minutes, you know, he's counted down. And then finally, like, it's got a little like, like a little like ball of like reflected light. And then the moon just appeared at the level of the water and slowly rose up. I've never seen a moonrise before that. I think I might have seen one since then. It was goddamn, man. It was fucking great.

But we did charter that boat, went to Rincha, went to Komodo Island, I touched the tail of a Komodo dragon. I thought it was the coolest thing ever. I got a stern talking to from the other guy because are you nuts I'm like well you hear all the most touching was I've never touched one that's crazy if they could turn around snap bite your arms gone I'm in Panama for my visa to go to Venezuela however this card is from moon all in CDMX. Oh, Museum Nacional de Arte. Munal. Oh, maybe not. Maybe it's that. Maybe not. Just wrapped up my sixth trip to Mexico. Oaxaca. Let's see. Have I?

Oaxaca, Mexico. By the way, this is the kind of fucking shit I put on my Patreon. So sign up! Patreon.com slash UBTrippin. Oaxaca. Nope. I 100% have not been to Oaxaca. I gotta go. I've heard it's great.

I've heard it's great. I heard they got that Cuchiller Pabil The city of Oaxaca is long but considered Mexico's culinary capital The most notable aspect of Oaxacan cuisine is a variety of mole. That's what it is mole Which type of complex socks be honest with you. I Don't like it Not a mole fan. I've gotten it plenty of times.

Well, I've got the greatest variety, including Negro, black, colorado, red, coloradito, faint red. Oh, I haven't had any of these. Maybe I gotta revisit my vision. I've only had the black, I've only had the Negro. Man, Negro is a fun word to say when you talk about mole. It's Negro. Oh, it feels wrong. It feels wrong.

It feels wrong. I do love a negro. Never had a Colorado, red, coochieo and verde, which is a green, amarillo, yellow. Well, it was a fun one. Mancha manteles, literally translated to stainer of tablecloths.

They're sold in markets all over the city. I mean, I got to get here now. I got to get here. Bars of chocolate, makes for hot chocolate, traditional breads. Chapulinas is fried grass. How about the chili? Oh, that originates from Oaxaca. Okay. Tlayudas are large slightly crispy corn tortillas piled high with ingredients such as grilled beef called tzajal cheese, tomatoes, avocados, onions. I've had that in Mexico City and they're fucking great. Guanabana's from there, Horchata's from there.

Okay. However, this card is for Munal and C-N-V-X. In the painting is of Oaxaca. Just wrap up my six trips to Mexico. Oaxaca is my favorite spot. That might be deja vu for you because I already read it. I realized now. Hopefully you get another card from Salto Angel. Google it. Invisiale soon. Okay well I will let's do it. Whoa Angel Falls. Wow look at that mist coming up. Oh my god. Oh my god. You think that guy's still there?

That fucking fake monk is still there? Wow. I mean yeah I gotta go. In VZLA soon. Venezuela. Political violence of Venezuela making this trip is making this trip tough. That's a good fucking travel note like I always recommend in Ecuador but then Ecuador is like can't go there anymore man oh I gotta wrap this up soon uh and visual is a political violence in Venezuela uh making this trip tough but uh Canaima National Park seems worth in something also. In Mexico I did also go on the hike to La Gloria waterfall. It's gorgeous. Your pal Dolan. Well Dolan, thank you very much. Sorry to make another Patreon, but you made it onto the regular episode of UB Trippin. And now comes the time where I continue to build this fucking wall of your...

I love these you guys. I love getting fucking postcards from around the world and seeing where you guys are going. I fucking get a kick out of it. I got the idea because in Edinburgh at the Fringe, Louis Katz is there now for one more week. Go catch him. Go over and watch the show. People would leave money from around the world in my bucket, change from like the Czech Republic, things like that.

It wasn't worth anything, but man it was so cool. I'm like, oh, these people have been places. That's well before I started this travel podcast called You Be Trippin'. You should subscribe right now. I'll also go to the Instagram page, You Be Trippin' pod. Subscribe on YouTube or wherever you're watching or listening Spotify, whatever And I thought it was so cool they've been places and I've asked people to fucking mail Their postcards and please you guys do too. Also, you can mail me money I'm filling up the fucking regular studio all with money in the background from different places that the podcast has been

I need a lot of different countries that we've been to a lot of EUs for sure, but I need some Thai money if anybody has some, some fucking Laotian to anybody. But if you want to send me a fucking small bill, don't make it worth anything. And I want to help decorate the wall with that. So this is now going up. Thank you, Dol you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank great ones, some big people you've always wanted to know about. Diaz is coming, fucking Shane Gillis is coming, hopefully Tim Dillon and Schultz is coming. We'll see who else, Harlan just did one that's fucking amazing. It's got a, we got a blast of things coming up.

I'm getting better and better at fucking interviewing people about this stuff. I always want to hear about it, but I'm getting better at fucking driving them and into a cool conversation The Sean Patton one is great You guys are gonna fucking love that one and go watch You know me by Greg Fitzsimmons right now on YouTube leave a comment go back and watch even if you only watch like two seconds

Hit it so it'll say it'll remind you to go back to it. That's it everybody. I'll see you next week He's a good buy in a in Gaelic Should always look these up. Goodbye in Ireland. This one was it. Sjangoff, slangoff y'all. What? Sjangoff y'all.

I'm saying it wrong. Okay, bye everybody. You wild? I'm saying it wrong. Okay. Bye everybody. Thank you. Until next week, goodbye.