You Be Trippin' - Why Ari Be Trippin: Switzerland w/ Paul Morrissey | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

Episode Date: January 6, 2025

Follow Paul Morrissey on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/paulhasawebsite SPONSORS: -Go to https://Shipskis.com and use the code ARI to get 20% off your first shipment and save yourself the hassle this ski season. On this episode of You Be Trippin, Ari and Paul Morrissey reflect on the trip that started it all and talk about everything but Switzerland. On the show, they discuss the Montreux Comedy Festival, the Bols Factory, and the recording studio where Freddie Mercury and David Bowie recorded Under Pressure. They also talk about feeling lonely, distracting yourself, and why Ari stopped doing his old podcast. There’s also a ton of random stories from their travels that were inspired by this initial trip to picturesque Switzerland, where they made a deal to visit two new countries every year. Gnüss es! You Be Trippin' Ep. 48 https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir https://www.instagram.com/youbetrippinpod https://store.ymhstudios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is your apartment. My old apartment. That was a lounge chair that was on Price is Right. What? Yeah. My brother-in-law had a company that made like hypoallergenic or like good for your back stuff. And you have to give Price is Right stuff to have it on there.

Yeah. And they go, you can get it back. OK. But you have to come pick it up yourself. That's Price is Right's rule. So I got Sean Halpin had a pickup truck. And he goes, yeah, I'll go. So we went and picked it up from Price is Right and got it back.

It had a cooler in the side. It was the most expensive thing I had in my life. It was the nicest thing I've ever had. Wait, how did you get it? You won it in Price is Right? No, they're done with it. They're like, you can get it back. We're not shipping it.

We'll use it as a prize. If they get it, they get it. If not, you can come get it back. So he was like, all right, go get it. It had a cooler in the side for beers and stuff. It was the nicest thing in my apartment. I had those couch shimitsi, but those were from like the 40s. That's hilarious.

Yeah, that's what you're sitting on. I told the fix-it guy to get it. I broke it later and he didn't get it. Where you been and where you going? This is Ari's Travel Show, yeah. We're gonna talk about travel today. It's UB Trippin', yeah. Hello ladies and gentlemen, welcome to UB Trippin'.

It's a travel podcast. Every week I have a guest that takes us to another place in the world that they've been. It's not a travel blog, it's experiential. So everybody's trip to a place is different and it's the only podcast in the world that accepts both brunettes, blondes and now gingers also. It's red. It's blonde dude come on. Take it off again. Bro. Sometimes I think I'm joking but then

sometimes I see it I'm like that's red. Paul Morrissey is today's guest. Everybody give a round of applause. Now here's why Paul's important, because Paul is a very influential man on my travels. Sometimes I have people on this podcast and I go, sometimes after the podcast, sometimes before, I'm like, you'll be on here a bunch. Tom Rhodes has not been on yet. He's gonna be on here a bunch.

Yoshi is gonna be on a bunch. He was on one, his hasn't come out yet. But we gotta talk about this deal we made in Switzerland. Well, where do you wanna go first? Or do you wanna decide later? Well, I'll write your, this is also on your thing. Where is it? No, there was like a post that you made

about how you started traveling. Oh, really? Yeah, and so that's your list. I think it was during the pandemic you got sentimental. 2014, yeah I got sentimental. China, Denmark, Germany, 2015. Thailand, UK, I'll count Scotland once the free country inside the next four years.

Well I was wrong but it's close. Norway, Iceland, Sweden, 2017. Myanmar, Cambodia, Vietnam, Indonesia, East Timor, Costa Rica, 2018, Austria, Croatia, Ireland, Belgium, Jordan, Egypt, Turkey, 2020, Spain, Colombia. Current country, I don't feel like mentioning it. I was in Ecuador. I was in Ecuador. I didn't want people to know I was there. I didn't want them to give me tips to like, so I'd be following their

footsteps. So then look at the last thing, says thanks. But this feels like, okay, the last sentence. Wait, those are in addition to the countries I got to revisit over that time. Canada, Mexico, Australia, Israel, Iceland, Norway, Switzerland, Sweden, Germany, the UK, Denmark, Thailand, Ireland, and even Switzerland,

and the Netherlands again. Sadly, it looks like the country I'm in now will be the only new country I get this year. There's an off chance I could try to make a border run next, it was Ecuador, border run next week just for an overnight trip, but that feels like cheating. That's why I never counted Belgium as a layover. And at least I got one, And that's an understandable footnote

of what'll hopefully be many more years of travel. Thanks Paul. That Switzerland Amsterdam trip was the fucking best. From that bread filled with melted cheese, raclette, Lake Montreux, and glühwein, to the coffee shop sex windows that place with the awesome grilled cheese sandwich. Yes, it sucks now.

House of Bowls and Frank House, Heineken Factory and Museum of Torture. I loved it all the way. We gotta do that motorcycle trip up in Vietnam and make our way into Laos. So, it must be missing the top part where I say why. I don't know, I only saw that part. What do you?

Well the point is, what we made this trip when we went to Switzerland is we made a deal. We went from Switzerland, we were already there, and every comic, I'll give this advice to, if they fly you out somewhere, you can ask them to fly you back from somewhere else. They don't care. I told this to Tony once, I told this to lots of people.

I told this to Jetski Johnson recently. I'm like, tell those guys you're gonna fly back a week later. They don't need you for the flight. Go to New Zealand, go somewhere. So we're like, let's have them fly us back from Amsterdam. Right. So then we went there.

I'd never been to Switzerland before. Then I went skiing with my brother. You went. No, I told you, but we got to spend like four or five days in Switzerland. Yeah, yeah. It was amazing. But then we met up again in Amsterdam and made this deal.

Well, yeah, we flew to Amsterdam. Where'd you go, Paris? Or Jessica Michelle went to Paris? I think she was like backpacking somewhere. Where'd you go? But I remember, I went home because I told you. You went back to America and came back again? No, no.

When we went to Amsterdam, I flew back from Amsterdam. In between is what I'm talking about. No, we went together to. No. I went skiing with my brother. In between Switzerland and Amsterdam, I went skiing with my brother. You don't remember this.

He picked me up from Montreux. No. You remember what happened when you went skiing? No. You tore your ACL or whatever. That's story tracks. I do that a lot. No, that's why you didn't talk to me for like a month. Cause I said, you said you're going to the Swiss Alps. I'm like, Ari, you haven't done anything

athletic in like years. Why would you think you can? So that was after Amsterdam? Yeah, you went there and I said, that's the dumbest thing in the world you can do. You're going to tear your knee up. And then you didn't talk to me for like a month because you tore your knee and then you were. No, that wasn't Whistler. I tore my knee up. No, I'm almost positive because you.

No, Whistler was my ankle. Dude, it totally was. I remember you were on a cart performing when I saw you. Oh yeah. When you came back. Interesting. And it was because you were so pissed that I told you what was gonna happen.

But I thought we went, I thought, we're from Switzerland, Jessica Michelle went to Paris, came back to meet us in Amsterdam. Yeah, she did. Because we needed five days off because I went skiing with my brother. I don't think so. I think we went right to Amsterdam.

She wasn't there the whole time. Hey Siri, call Jessica Michelle Singleton. She wasn't there the whole time. She wasn't there the whole time. We all went to different places and then met back up. Come on. Hey Siri, call Jessica Michelle Singleton. There we go. She'll know. Yeah, yeah. Oh, she know yeah yeah I remember watching her backpack

yeah like she had this big giant thing and she just started walking down the road I'm like five foot three yeah it's like what if you get robbed you're like pick me up with it either way she's not gonna answer hey well I'm not gonna answer. Hey, I'm here with Paul Morrissey. We got a question. Hey, we're on a podcast. Hi podcast. It's a travel podcast. We're trying to remember the timeline of Montreux, Switzerland to Amsterdam. Did we take a few days off in between those two places? You do. You did.

You went skiing with your family. I think maybe we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my family.

I think we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my family. I think we went skiing with my. You did, you went skiing with your family. I think, maybe Paul was with you, I think that's what you were doing, because I went to Paris. She went to Paris and then we met back up. No, I remember Jessica went backpacking, so you were like leaving when we were still in Switzerland and we were going to Amsterdam. And you went to go see your

I thought you guys went fucked off separately. Yeah I think you went to Germany or some shit. I don't think so I was in Switzerland the whole time. So maybe you stayed in Switzerland then longer. I think I fucked up my ankle another time. Did you go ski with your family? Yeah I went to ski with my brother but in Amsterdam I wasn't limping was I? See but Jessica he tore his knee up skiing so he was hurt when he came back. That's why he skied afterwards, I feel like. Oh yeah, because you weren't limping, because I feel like there was a lot of walking around.

Yeah, yeah, we walked all over the place. We walked around, so yeah, and I don't think I tore my knee up then. No, you didn't. We saw so many hookers in windows. So many hookers in windows, remember the big, oh. I always come up with a bit of like, I love when it's all many hookers in Windows. So many hookers in Windows. Remember the big, oh. I always come up with a bit of like,

I love when it's all the hookers and then the last window is like a CPA or something. It's just like, where it ends. It's like counting, right next to, just, but I couldn't care less for the prostitutes. They were like on their phones. On their phones. And I tried to get you guys to,

I was like, let's all go to a sex show, and you guys were like, no. We did puss out, you went to it. We were too scared. I was so weird,'s all go to a sex show, and you guys were like, no. We did puss out. You went through it. We were too scared. That was so weird. Why were we so scared? You were so adventurous.

I'm just discussing. I think everyone's like, is this going to be a liability where we get canceled later? But there was a couple days where you weren't there, because we did Anne Frank in the House of Bowls without Jessica. Oh, yeah. I know.

I went to Anne Frank with you guys, because we had grilled cheese sandwiches at the end. Rights without Jessica. Oh yeah. I know, I went to Anne Frank with you guys because we had grilled cheese sandwiches at the end. Right, then she. All right. I'm trying to think. But you guys definitely, I think you went to the Van Gogh Museum. Yeah. When you guys were just on a plane so you gave me, somebody gave me a whole bunch of

mushrooms and I had never done them up to that point. So then I had them and was just wandering around the city right on the shore of the Loan. Wow. All right, I'll call you later. All right, bye. Thank you. Bye. Anyway, regardless, I think I'm right. Well, it's funny that so many things have happened

that you can't remember. This is an interesting with travel and also in life, but you blend stuff where you lose timelines and you're positive this happened then. We're both positive about different things. We both know we went to Amsterdam and Switzerland. Right.

The timelines are what's in what country when, is another thing. And the other thing I remember, I don't remember her being at the Anne Frank house. I remember us. But she was, if she says it. I remember us walking out of the, cause Artie was the one who told us to go to the grilled cheese place. Artie Lang?

Yeah. Cause he, his whole story was about how, you know, he's like, that is the Anne Frank House where, you know, horrific things were done and that is a great place for pancakes. But we got the grilled cheese, by the way, so I went back, I went back twice. One time it was closed at three, I had a joke about it, because I was like, I didn't know it closed at three, I was fucking around, I could have been there earlier,

and I'm like really pissed, because it was my favorite grilled cheese of all time, and I'm really pissed, I'm almost like crying a little bit, and then people come in, the Aunt Frank, I was crying, and I was like, right, the grilled cheese closed at two early. Yeah, well my bit was, and this is twice as it's happened where I'm the ugly American.

So I remember we, so you did get kind of emotional at the actual, cause it was. How could you not? It was crazy, you know? So then just eating something like that to cheer you up was so good. But it literally was next to the house. So I remember us coming out.

That was an attached building. And basically like high-fiving, like, that was fucking awesome. And everyone thought we were coming out of the Hank Frank house. You look like a Nazi too. You're like, you look like you're going, good times. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

So I was just like, oh, we look like ugly Americans, Ben. But that's so funny. So then I went back a second time, had it. Something was missing. And then I found out later, because my brother was like, somebody went there, they said it sucked. I'm like, no way, they're wrong.

And then I went back again, and new ownership. They just do form and grill now with like one slice of cheese. It's not the same. That's over. It was the greatest. It's done. Guys, I'll break it into the episode really quick

to tell you about my guest, Paul Morrissey, and a little about this episode. He is a comedian and a very, very funny one. You should see him. All of his dates are on paulhaswebsite.com slash tour. In March, he's at the Venetian Las Vegas. In May, he's at the Tabernacle in Atlanta. I'm gonna be there.

Ruth Eckhart Hall, Clearwater, Florida. SideSplitters in Florida, in Wesley Chapel, Florida, um, side splitters in Florida and Wesley chapel, Florida and laughs unlimited in Sacramento, May 30th through 31st, go to Paul has a website.com slash tour for all his dates. I have a special next week on Netflix. Everybody America, sweetheart. It's a great, well, the newest special I have, I take a long time because I do them right, um, and it's something special and I'm trying to get a couple of you, at least

one, my whole goal is if I get one person to stop reading the news and ignore all that stuff in a funny laughing way to get through to you, then I've done my job. Um, tell all your friends, set your calendars right now, legitimately go into your phones right now. And, uh, January 14th, set a calendar saying right now. Legitimately, go into your phones right now and January 14th, set a calendar saying, play Ari Shaffir special. And if you can't watch it all the way through,

let it play, because that's how the algorithm works on Netflix, you gotta play it all the way through to get to it. Also, I got a bunch of dates coming. Some of these with Adrian Apoluchi, everything is available on my website, arishaffir.com. Providence. She'll be there, uh, Salt Lake city, Brea.

She'll be there. Nashville. She'll be there. San Antonio, Tampa, maybe Simone will be there in Tampa, Denver, Schomburg, she'll be there for Chomberg, Atlanta, Portland agent will be there for both of those, the dark queen and then San Jose or now we're in March, San Jose, Orlando, Fort Lauderdale, Seattle at the Moore. That's a big one. These are all theaters now. Vancouver, Calgary, Edmonton, all sold out.

Maybe there's another show you should check the website right now. And then finishing it off in Anchorage, Alaska on June 18th, right before the solstice. And then I'm done you guys for 2027. If I named any of your cities, I won't be back there until, besides Denver. And that's it. I won't be back in any of those cities till 2028, 2029. So I would, I'd get tickets then. That's it. Let's get back to the episode.

Please subscribe wherever you're listening and that's it. But my new special is the one you wanna watch. Tell everybody about it. Do me a favor and let's blow this thing up. I'm proud of it. Ladies and gentlemen, let's get back to Paul Morris. Also I wanted to tell you this. This episode, the reason I'm doing it the first one of the year, because this is why I started traveling from this episode. I'm gonna realize it a little later in this episode. But this is why I started going nuts. I've tried to figure out like, what was first? It's like my China run or something.

It all stemmed from this trip I had with Paul Morrissey. We made this deal that we should go see more places. So this whole, this whole podcast you'd be tripping is all based on what happened on this trip, me and Paul in Montreux, Switzerland, and then in Amsterdam, but this began it all. And you guys should have your own trips that begin your fuckin', your love of travel. Dope.

That being said, let's enjoy the rest of it. Sorry, I interrupt this interruption to tell you that I have a screening next week for my special America Sweetheart in Austin, Texas at the Creek in the Cave. I think it's at 5pm, might be at 7pm, I don't know. But get tickets at rhfrey.com. Creek in the Cave preview. Q&A and my special America Sweetheart at the Creek in the Cave. Reasonable tickets. Let's have drinks in the back. It's fun. Let's have a party. I'll see you there.

Okay, back to the interruption, then back to the episode. And then you had a great bit about, didn't you have something about the Heineken factory, which is funny? You went to the Heineken factory, I went to Anne Frank. No, we went to, yeah. But in the bit I said, my buddy went to Heineken factory, I go, I have to go to Anne Frank,

and you go, that seems like a downer. I'm like, yeah, for sure it's gonna be a downer. I thought you said like, you think it was like, guys with fetal alcohol poisoning or something. I was like, they have a whole ride, that's it. They have a whole ride through whatever, and then instead of Oompa Loomas, it's just kids with fetal alcohol syndrome.

But then we went to the low key one was that bowls. Bowls, no one talks about it. Yeah, it's like basically they're schnapps. So like you, they have blue bowls is funny, but that's like the mix in like the UK instead of like schnapps, they'll mix bowls. So they had those bottles where you could juggle them and stuff because they're almost made to like spin and do all the cocktail things. And then, and then we made a video in like that little room and I have that somewhere.

Do we really? We gotta put that in bro. We gotta put that in. Yeah, the Bowls Factory. They used to make Absinthe and all the stuff that was illegal. Didn't they have a painting there by a Rembrandt type level guy who was like, I can't pay my bill, because there used to be a bar, and he goes, I'll make you a painting, it'll be worth a few million. Yeah, literally, I think it was Rembrandt who ran up his bill so much that he just gave them the painting. So it's still like in there. Imagine being drunk off only Bulls alcohol.

Being a fucking absurdly drunk. Was it absinthe or one of those things that was like, used to eat your brain? You know all that stuff, right? What's the worst one, absinthe or what's the other? But now you can't get real Absinthe anymore. It's all this fake version of it. It's kinda like hemp.

Yeah, Jennifer. Yeah, they gave you two samples. You could drink whatever you want. Yeah, we have a video of you doing that. Oh, yeah? Somewhere. You're juggling the bottles. Oh, we gotta find that.

It's gotta be on some flip phone somewhere. Oh, and then, yeah, and then we have, that was from the Heineken factory of us. Back to your phone. Oh yeah, they take a picture of ya. Look at that hair on that guy. Ah, I'm jealous. I gotta go to Turkey if you know what I mean.

Yeah, and that was the bowl. Whoa, look at that hair! When was this? December 19th, 2013. Well, that's the trip. So that's the, but look at my drink, how it matches your sweater. Oh my God.

Is that crazy? Yeah. Okay, so I gotta say this though. Okay. So after, this is why it's a very important podcast we're doing now, for this podcast. So where was it when we made this plan, this challenge? I remember either in the lobby of the festival

with Lugio Segolla and you guys after eating raclette or it's somewhere in Amsterdam where we decided this. My recollection was, after Amsterdam, we said something along the lines of like, why don't we do this instead of Sacramento every year? You know what I mean? Or Baltimore, not the shit on cities we've been to

all over, but it's like, why don't we, even if we go to two cool places and the shows are terrible, because the Switzerland why don't we, even if we go to like two, two cool places and the shows are terrible, because like the Switched On show wasn't amazing, but like just doing the trip was awesome. It was a free flight to a country. We honestly, when we started comedy, it was, it's almost like it doesn't make sense now

because comedy is so big. But like the odds of us ever getting flown to Europe were like zero. It was our first English speaking show. It was a French festival Yeah, and they flew everybody out put us all up and then at the end they're like here's 500 bucks, right? That wasn't part of the deal even and it was like yeah, it's Mike Leibovitz Yeah, you I so who's gonna be on this podcast about carnival Yeah, it's like why not go to these places?

Yeah. And that was like, oh yeah, I remember now because I ended up doing all the other cool shit in Montreux. You stayed. Because I went to- While I was skiing in Zermatt. I went to

the recording studio where they did Under Pressure. Smoke on the water. But they have a statue of Freddie Mercury. We have that picture somewhere. And there's a casino, that's a casino now, but it's where the studio was where it was like David Bowie and Queen just met up at a bar and they're like, hey, let's record something.

And they go to this studio and they record under pressure. No way. Oh, he's like hammered. And the next day, he's like, hey, Freddie, you gotta let me redo that. And he's like, no, don't be so dramatic. It's already done. I already sent it in.

So they have all Freddie Mercury's lyric sheets, all his costumes, everything. I believe it was Melbourne with Kylie Sparrow, and we went to the, and Julie Lawless, and we went to the David Bowie exhibit, it was a traveling exhibit, and they cleaned it up a little bit when I went to Brooklyn,

because this is the part they didn't have, they had all of his Coke spoons. They had a giant display, these beautiful engraved Coke spoons, and he had like 20 of them and they didn't shy away from any of that. He, when he told Ziggy Stardust band he was done on stage, well they're like, wait what?

They're like, we're done, I'm not done with Ziggy Stardust, I'm just being Dave Bowie from now on, the band's over and they were like, oh, because here's the last song and they're like, wait, they're just looking at each other like, I'm out of a job? He goes, it's this long thing, he goes, thank you very much, you've been a wonderful audience. I have to tell you something, not only is this,

and he's blown out of his mind on co. And he goes, not only is this the final song of the night, and not only is this the final night of the tour, it is also the final show Ziggy Stardust will ever do. And then they're all like, what, wait, wait, what? I didn't know he picked one. Yeah. That's crazy.

Yeah, and then, let's go. And by the way, the coolest thing ever, we were talking about my buddy who was in the restaurant biz there. He's a, you know, like, you gotta get a trainer in New York and they always don't have these gyms so it might be like You know you you have a trainer But he might take it to like a one-room thing with like two treadmills in it at a building or something you know

So my buddy had this trainer, and he took him you know sometimes you take him to random places so he takes him to this like basically just this room that had like two treadmills and like a bunch of free weights and David Bowie's on the other treadmill. Whoa. That crazy? Yeah, that is crazy. Would you pick up your speed or you would you try to stay? I try to stay dead even with them.

We were talking about this yesterday that who is saying it? Oh, Aaron Berg. He said Shooter McGavin was in his crowd. Yeah. Yeah. And he was like, he's like, when you see a celebrity, that's not, he's not the biggest fan of whoever that guy is. Yeah. But he liked him from the movie.

Right, right. And you just want to impress them. Yeah, absolutely. They're not even your guy, but you're like, I want to, I just, I've recognized, they can't do anything for you, you just want to impress them. It just comes out.

What's the weirdest? I would stay even with dope, Bowie. Yeah, which the weirdest person in the crowd that you knew about? Topanga. Probably the store, right? Topanga, there was one night where two massive celebrities, I believe it was, oh, the guy who moved to Austin now, from True Romance, not True Romance, True Detective.

Mccone? Yeah. And I may be wrong about Mccone. So it might be someone else and John Bon Jovi. Oh, no way. One was drunk, the Mccone, or it was someone else. But let's just say Mccone for Mccone's sake. Mccone, if it's not you, sorry.

But he was drunk and just heckling everybody in the belly room too. Oh wow. And just like being belligerent, that's what happens. Anytime kid rocks at a show, the show's over, he's taken over. And it was one of those where you feel like a celebrity, Big and Rich were coming in to destroy shows by making it about themselves. They don't just sit there.

Right. Victor Cruz was in the crowd last night. No way. Yeah, big, giant football player. They told me, although I wouldn't have recognized it, we're sweatpants, they can't find pants that fit. And I enjoyed making him laugh. I did my Australian football versus rugby joke. He was loving it.

But he kept heckling, let's say McConnay kept heckling, and then John Bon Jovi would come to the green room and apologize for him, and then go back to sit down. The next guy would get heckled and annoyed by, John Majore would come say, I'm really sorry for my friend, he's just too drunk. Go back to the room over and over and over again. Good times.

Yeah, the weirdest one I had was, it was Ventura Harbor, which you wouldn't think you'd see anybody, but it was this beautiful blonde in all leather. She's like third row, but it was like, you have no idea who it is, but this is somebody. You're somebody, yeah. And it was like actually distracting,

like you know how usually you're focused, but I'm like, this woman is like beautiful. She ended up being the lead singer of Berlin. Oh wow. That Terry Nunn. Yeah. Like Take My Breath Away. Take my breath away. And I got a picture with her afterwards and stuff,

but she was still stunning. Like that's, but the weirdest one lately was I did a show in Phoenix. I think Terri Hatcher used to come into the cellar. Oh yeah? And she was like, still got it. Who's the, who do they, like the door guys tell you the hottest girl that ever came in?

I said Terri Hatcher came in a lot. Let me try to think. No, I don't know. There's a guy. You know the Brody story we gotta talk about. What's that? You know the Brody one. No.

No one's gonna get this, because it's a reference from, what was the show his 2D on? Facts of Life. Facts of Life, so it was a Facts of Life one. So Brody's a very clean comic and very positive whatever, and we're fucking with him and tweaking him, really driving him to suicide.

Yeah, yeah. Pretty early on. It was a years long project to make him kill himself. Success. And anyway we're fucking with him, he's like, hey guys, you wanna learn something, come on in and watch me. Like the fake bragging.

Right. And then we're fucking with him a little bit, he's enjoying it, whatever, and he goes, I'll show you I'm good, let me do some cry work. And she's like, you know, just talking. He's like, well, what's your name? He's like, is it make fun? Someone else is like, what's your name?

She's like, Jerry. He goes, oh, like Jerry Jewell, like from Facts of Life. I'm Jerry Jewell, I'm Jerry Jewell. And then the lady goes, I am Jerry Jewell. And he's like, what? She goes, I am Jerry Jewell, what the fuck, Athol? And he just went white and it was Jerry Jewel. Oh, that's hilarious. The first, it was like cerebral palsy.

Yeah, yeah. I heard she was a standup too. Yeah, she was. That's why she came into watch. She's probably a regular at the store. Guys, I love skiing, but the hard thing is getting your skis and your boots and your equipment to where you're going and I mess up a lot. I'm a comedian and I'm not organized. Sometimes I'll

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And you're on the slopes, you're freezing your fucking ass off. It could have been solved with Shipskis.com. Listen, I'm a little too upset about it, but I'm out here and I'm cold. Right now, there's a solution. Go to Shipskis.com. Listen, I'm a little too upset about it, but I'm out here and I'm cold. Right now there's a solution. Go to Shipskis.com. Right now Shipskis is offering our listeners 20% off your first shipment when you go to Shipskis.com and use the code ARIE. Go to Shipskis.com, use code ARIE to get 20% off your first shipment and save yourself

the hassle this ski season. That's S-H-I-P-S-K-I-S.com. Make sure you use the code Ari so they know that I sent you. Shipskis.com. Guys, don't be like me. Be organized. What else you got? The weirdest one lately was I was in Phoenix and it was like one of those like a theater at like a community theater and they're just like, hey no, you can say anything but no OJ jokes. I was like, what year is this that you would want me to stay away from OJ jokes?

And I go, you don't have to worry about it. And they said, well it's because Fred Goldman lives here. Goldman Sachs? No the the waiter's dad who he killed was in the audience. Proven innocent though. He was in the third row. I remember he was on the news all the time like he has a mustat has a handlebar mustache with glasses. Wow. And I was just like, oh, that's the weirdest thing that's ever happened at a show, I think.

Yeah. Okay, so buddy, wait, I just realized, we gotta get back to this, because we didn't even finish the story. So what'd you say? Why are we going to Sacramento? Why are we going to Baltimore all the time for travel? Yeah, let's do two new places like this every year.

We challenge ourselves. Yeah. Because we did two there and it was like, Michelle did three, Jessica Michelle, excuse me, my daughter. First father daughter team in the Congress or history. Look, let's do two new countries every year. We really checked in with each other.

Yeah. We didn't let ourselves go. You'd be like, check this out. You'd always show me, check this out, where are you? On the coast of this, I'm like, oh, hell yeah. And then you're like, what do you got this year? I'm like, I already did this and I'm going to this. Yeah, but you also, there was a year where you didn't have a phone.

So you would tell me you're in all these places, but I don't know if you have any pictures. I had a Canon Mark VII for a while. When I was in Southeast Asia, I had that. What year did you do the flip phone thing? Well, I didn't bring my phone to Southeast Asia. Like East Timor? Yeah, I didn't have a phone for that,

but I had that Canon Mark VII, which was my favorite camera, my only camera I've ever had, actually. That's crazy. Yeah, and had to flip up a screen that you could like look at and that went down so you could go up, like get high above a crowd

and point it down so you could see yourself. I got pictures like. No, but it's insane that you didn't have a phone in all these places. Like that's like old school. I mean they don't have internet to get anyway then. I guess, but like if you needed something or you had like a snake bite.

So what I had was a burner phone that I bought in Scotland at the Edinburgh Festival that was after a year you could jailbreak it. And it was like 60 pounds for the phone. It was shitty. I think it had like a memory of 500 megabytes. Like nothing. But enough that I could do maps.me

so I could have my way around a country if I got wifi to download the country like Myanmar. I'm like, okay, I got all the roads. And then if I needed to make a flight, I could get to where there was wifi, I could make a flight from there. I could get on the internet enough, but not good. Do you know I bought a phone for Switzerland?

Really? Yeah, like in the airport. I was one of those rubes. I'm like, what if I need a phone? He's trying to bury his treat. Are you gonna hide it? He's doing wolf shit. He sees it there, he just wants to bury it. Now he's unbearing it. Let it go, let it go, let it go. It's just funny. It's like they're so part of their like

the leftover wolf shit. It's like when they rub themselves in like poop. You ever see that? Yeah. the leftover wolf shit. It's like when they rub themselves in like poop. You ever see that? Yeah. Was he hiding, he's hiding it for herself? For himself, yeah. We found all these, all my plants on my deck,

all dug up and I, squirrels, and then I'm like, oh fuck, the squirrels got through the birds. And then I like, what the fuck? And I was like uprooting the roots that had been ruined and I found a bone and I'm like, oh, it was Bandit. Yeah. Hi Bandit, I was just saying your name'm like, oh, it was Bandit. Yeah. Hi Bandit, I was just saying your name, don't worry about it.

Hi buddy, good, nobody's gonna find that. Bury it more, good job. Show your ass. Show your ass a little bit buddy. The people see what we're talking about here, okay. So but we're like, let's do two new countries a year. Yeah. And that's been my goal.

Only that Ecuador COVID year and I, all of November, all December and the first four months of the next year, we're all Ecuador, so it was like fine, I only got one, but what a one. Two straight months in Ecuador. But then you did a bunch of, you did like Romania, all those kind of, like I was doing like Japan.

Yeah, you went to Japan. Singapore, Hong Kong, Vietnam. Yeah, you went to all those. And you went for touring. Yeah, yeah. You got comedy to pay for those trips. Yeah, we did the Magnus Comedy Festival, so they brought us to seven countries in 10 days.

I like this challenge because it forced me, I would've, if not for the challenge, I would've failed on it. Yeah? But like, there was one where I went to like Polynesia, where I'm like, fuck, it's almost New Year's and I don't have one yet. So I went from the West Coast to Polynesia

for four or five nights. Not worth it. But I had to. Where'd you go? Tahiti and Moriah. Did you go to Rangiroa? No. That's my favorite place in the world. Really? Rangiroa.

Yeah, it's like, it's like if you go into Papite or whatever. Papite, yeah, that's where I flew into. I'll show you this, where is it? Oh wow, so I was down there, and you're way up there, what the fuck's Rangiroa? Wait, up or down? It was,

so basically, I flew into Papite And your way up there, what the fuck's Rangaroa? Wait, up or down? It was a... So basically, I flew in a poppy tail or something like that and then there was a... Like a little ship you could get off for like the day. All the pictures are of diving. And I was just walking around. Wow, look at this. It's a barely connected like... You have pictures of it? Yeah, I'll show you. We still have to go to this actual trip we're talking about.

Yeah, yeah. Well, I guess we'll get to it. Rangaroo. Oh, it's right. You can search now. Tahiti. Dude, my favorite thing about Tahiti was seeing the notable like expats that lived there or people not from there that lived there. It was like an F1 driver, obviously. What's his name from Godfather? Was big into it, big fat one.

He loved it there. What was his name? The Godfather's father. F1 driver? No, forget the F1 driver, the Godfather guy. Oh, Brando. Brando, yeah. And then the artist that was there.

Painter? The painter, what's his name? Painter Tahiti. Brando. Yeah. And then, um, the artist that was there, um, painter, the painter, what's his name? Painter Tahiti. He went there from, from France, um, uh, Paul Gauguin. Oh, go get super colonial went hard on having like child brides and stuff. Who's a drunk. And they said, they talked about Brando a little bit and all these exhibits, and then they go, and then they go, Paul Gauguin, that was his, it was like, died 1837 of misery. Yeah, so I loved it so much.

Let me find it, I don't know. Yeah. Put Tahiti in here. But we have all these other ones. All right, but let's talk about this Chipper Gold. Yeah, yeah. Now we're already fucking 40. We should be wrapping up. We haven't even started yet.

Well, I think it was like, my idea was like to, because, you know, are you allowed to say what you're doing next year or no? Oh yeah. Oh, hold on a second. Let me think. No. Okay. Well, I just thought it was like a good milestone because what we're going traveling, I'll just say

that we're at a so it's basically 11 years since we started doing this December 2013. This is December 2024. And we'll take the pandemic year out. So it's basically 10. I still got one that year. Did you get any that year? You really would have you verbatism verbatism, You really had to go in January or February somewhere. I was in Hawaii, but that doesn't count. And then again in October, because that middle six, seven, eight months,

you're not going anywhere. My favorite story of that was what you told me about some friend of yours in Vietnam. Which one? You were like, missed the last flight home. Everyone's trying to get their last flights home. Right. And he missed it, and he goes, fuck.

And then he's like, oh, I'm in a country that's gonna cost me $7 a day to live. This is amazing. Yeah, it was a girl from Montreal. Yeah, she stayed there. Wow. Yeah, that's crazy. So let's talk about our trip though.

Okay. You've never been to Switzerland before. I have never. They flew us out. What do you remember about it? It was, I remember, so it was like a contest or something because it was just when you had gotten your TV show. So it was like one of those things where they're like,

we want you to host this thing. And then they picked like five comedians. So. Yeah yeah it was this they go I want you to be an ambassador to get some submissions. Right. We're going English so they had a sketch and a stand-up part. There was the only two English, the rest is French, it's a long-standing French festival. Probably Mike Ward's probably done it and go let's do a little English. So can you be an ambassador? You seem like you have an online presence.

Cause my show at the time was online. It was still digital. I was like, sure. Which is funny because they didn't, they were like, oh yeah, he's like a, it's like when you see them, it's like somebody hiring you for a corporate gig or something.

It's like, have you not seen any of his stuff? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, and the sketch people ended up getting like 40 submissions. We had 400 plus. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, so, um, and the sketch people ended up getting like 40 submissions. We had 400 plus. Yeah, yeah. And you said, from my old apartment where we used to get bangs while we're trying to do a podcast, where I got thrown out for doing business, which was an audio podcast of us talking shit.

They're like, that's a business. Um, you said, I remember talking to people like, Hey, I'm applying to that festival, your ambassadoring. They gave me like five grand to go also, which was nice. And then you go, can you help get me in? And then I realized, oh, maybe I can. It was just them, I just wanted submissions that they were gonna choose, but I'm like, yeah, that'd be way more fun if you came with me.

Yeah. And so then I tried to tell them, I was like, hey, I'll go over the submissions for you if you want. Because they had to narrow it down from 400 to what? Like 50? The audience voted down to like 10, and then they would choose five from there. That was the hard part is I still had to get votes

and views after that. So I was like, OK. And I was like, tell you what, guys, I'll watch something. They're like, why don't you take 100? She'll take 100. He'll take 100. He'll take 100. I'm like, no, just take them like, tell you what guys, I'll watch something, they're like, why don't you take 100, she'll take 100, he'll take 100, he'll take 100. I'm like, no, just take them all. I learned so much about submission tapes

that if the audio's fucked, you just skip in. I got it from the other perspectives side, from the industry side. But anyone I had heard of, any comic I knew in any way was getting passed into the final 50. And then other ones, if they were just good, they were also getting passed in. So you, I didn't know Kevin Iso, he was just a good one.

I didn't know Mike Leibovitz, he was just a good one. You, Jessica Michelle, I mean, any of them from door guy to headliner. And I was like, hey guys, I gave a nice selection of upper level people, lower level people, men and women, but really I just wanna tell them anyone I knew was getting passed. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, Jessica really I just want to tell them anyone I knew was getting passed. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, Jessica, Michelle, and you all got passed. You all got to the final 10, and then I helped choose, and it was like, no, then it was on them again. Yeah, I had to get votes, which sucked, because, I mean, at that point I'd done late late show like four times, so I had like TV credits. Right. But then it goes, it's funny because every contest

I've ever been in, I've lost, but something good has happened from it. So basically I worked on this five minute set for that contest, did the contest, I lost. I don't even know what place I came. Leibowitz won. Leibowitz won, he got invited back the next year. I just saw him again.

And it was the guy Bruce Hills from JFL was there. And then. And you know what, he was there. To meet up with Queen's manager and go skiing. Yeah, exactly. He was there technically to judge as the head of JFL, but really he's like, no, they flew me to, same as us. They flew me to Switzerland.

I'm gonna go and join myself. And they're back in business, so congrats. But so that, so this is December 2013. So then that set I've been practicing, like it did okay in Switzerland, but none of, you know. It was 40 people in a banquet room yeah yeah it wasn't anything so but also then we met sorry go ahead oh no good we met up with Luis Hogola and all these South African comics

yeah that's why I met Luis oh yeah there was some other guys too they were all pretty funny and really cool yep fun to hang out with you got a perspective of South Africa I've never gotten before and And they did a show in French I think, right? Oh really? The night before. There was like a different. Oh they all speak French? Yeah. But then that set that I had worked on was the set that I submitted to Letterman and

I got Letterman the next like six months later. Oh great. So that, even though I lost the contest, that helped me. That's good about focusing on positives. Please give it up for Mr. Paul Morrissey, everybody. Let him hear it. Yeah! Oh, it's good to be here.

I like being in Switzerland. I kind of blend in with you people. So let's talk about, so we get there. What I remember is the Christmas village, above all. Yeah. And then later, because that Christmas over was so fun with tchotchkes to buy, it wasn't like I heart Switzerland, like the dumb Times Square shit.

It was legit. It wasn't even Zurich, it was Montreux. They had Hitler Russian dolls and Freddie Mercury and all kinds of weird shit. But this like long bun that they took a stick and just like went long ways instead of cutting it open. Well it was a baguette. It was a French baguette.

And they just had a spike that you could like spike the whole middle. So there's a hole in the middle. Yeah, so and then they had a. But it wasn't all completely opened up. It was just a hole. But kind of like when you're at the beach and they put your beach thing down, So, and then they had a- But it wasn't all completely opened up. It was just a hole. But kind of like when you're at the beach and they put your beach thing down,

they put your umbrella down and they make a hole first, then put it in and cover it up. Yeah, so it's like one of those hot dog buns that have just the middle out. So it was basically like that. And then there was a saucepan and the guy was just putting in fine wine and Gruyere cheese. And then he would just pour it into the hole. So it was this giant like classy mozzarella stick. Basically. I remember that, um, second, this is a market bread.

I remember that they would fill it with cheese and then cheese would settle and then refill it more. It would soak in a little bit because it melted. Oh wait, which is a local Delcece called Chasbangal, which is a hollowed out baguette, low filled with fondue. Oh yeah, what's it named for? I gotta look this up as a picture. All right, Chasbanger.

Wow, images. Yup. There we go. Yup, look at that. I didn't know there because it was so cool. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that.

I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that.

I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. I remember trying that. The blue wine, which is like the hot wine. Okay. Oh yeah, yeah, that's right.

I'm not a big wine guy, but I remember trying that because it was so cold. Yeah. But then also the most, the best part, do you remember the night before the show, they had that big dinner? Yeah. And they had the whole thing of Rocklet.

And we had never had Rocklet before. This is it, bro. This is the fucking top Christmas markets on Lake Geneva. I mean, this is it. This is the Christmas market. Look at that. With the mountains behind it. It was so fucking cool.

We were fucking kids. We were all kind of poor. Yeah, yeah. And we got to go to this fucking crazy thing on the arm. Yeah, with the mountains behind, the lake was right behind these huts, if I remember right. Lake was in between these huts and the mountains. Yeah, like everything was a postcard.

Mobbed, that's a good way to put it. Everything was a postcard. Wow. That's why I was like, there's no way you're gonna be able to ski those mountains. I mean, what a time it was. Oh yeah. There was a Ferris wheel too. I think, right? Sounds right. There was like a little fair part, but yeah. God damn bro. Um, 48 hours of fun. Somebody else went there too.

No, the mantra. Yeah, it's underrated, because all you hear about is Zurich and somewhere else in Switzerland. The only thing I feel bad about, we should have asked Jessica about it, was the next year, like I'd done Letterman,

and like I was kind of, I think I was working on a pilot at CBS. Yeah. So they, some lady emailed me and said, can you make a, like a, do a knock knock joke and post it online for the festival? Cause they wanted me to be like the. Ambassador? Yeah. Oh. And I was, it just felt like it wasn't, for the festival, because they wanted me to be like the.

Ambassador? Yeah. Oh. And I was, it just felt like it wasn't, you remember that, it was that one beautiful girl. She was gorgeous. She was so, I saw her at Edinburgh one year. She mentioned they might do something in South Africa

or something, I was like, I'm in. And then it never panned out, but she was dying. Yeah, that was like, when you run a company like that and you hire like a beautiful woman. Gosh, you knew what she was doing too, which comes from LA. I had never seen someone who was hot and smart. And you remember what you did to her?

Oh boy, no. Go get a set. No, she left her phone open. So you wrote on her Facebook thing that she was pregnant. You remember that? Anyone who says I became an edgelord now doesn't know me from a long time ago. I don't even know if they translated it into French.

Yeah, it might've been. But yeah, she was like. Yeah, you could buy all these cheese and chocolates at the fair. Oh yeah, the chocolate was the other deal. Wow. Like, squished chocolates. Look at all that. It was so fucking deal. Wow, look at all that. It was so fucking cool.

And it wasn't that cold, it was early in the winter. So it wasn't freezing, it was cold weather, but not crazy. The glue line was so good. But you know what this made me do? Every time there's a Christmas village, anywhere in Europe, I'm checking it out. I have a cup, that's not here,

from the Manchester Christmas factory that I went to with Evan DeMarie. Oh, that's funny. And I got the glue-by in there. That's hilarious. Dude, it ruled in this minor town in Switzerland. They put us in a nice hotel.

We did, did we do a podcast from there? Because that was the only thing I was thinking about. Did we? Because we, I mean, I don't know if you remember, because we didn't really know each other until we started. Because we're- Sean Kemp's kids. Yeah, well, but- No, you played Saturday game. But most of those guys started that league,

and everyone kind of like, like comedy store guys who didn't really know everybody else, everyone started like hanging out a little bit. That's how I met David Taylor, you. Yeah, I mean the Saturday game with the Sclar's how I met David Taylor, you. Yeah. And then. I mean the Saturday game with the Scleras players. Yeah, and you got to know everybody.

And then you were somewhat normal by then. Like I'd heard all the stories about you. But then when we met, you were actually interested in playing basketball, because you're like, yeah, I wanna learn how to pick and roll and rebound and stuff like that. Jeff died too. Well we did one about your basketball days.

We know we did a podcast there. Yeah, yeah, but I'm saying we kinda met through that and then your podcast was just getting started. So I think even the travel stuff, cause that's what I'm saying, you're doing a travel podcast now. How do you say that this doesn't lead to things? Bonus material, basketball with Paul Morrissey. Because that's what I'm saying. You're doing a travel podcast now. Like, how do you say that this doesn't lead to anything?

Bonus material, basketball with Paul Morrissey. Sports machine. That's about your time as a sports anchor. Take me out to the ball game where we went. That's the most famous one. In that apartment, we did it on the subway. This was so DIY because everyone's like, it was pre anyone even having a studio.

I think it's the best thing that's ever been done. You can hear us going, walking down the street, being on the subway, being at the, you can hear the crack of the bat. We're on the way to Yankee Stadium. We're in, so we, we, we're so under the radar. You had these SM58s, but they looked professional back then. It's these. So we were in the...

It's the same ones I'm using. But we were in the front row of the bleacher section. So the security guys thought we were actually broadcasting. So we were doing the whole thing, and then remember, there was a no-hitter through five innings and it was a good game, too. It was a good game. And then we had those girls recognize, no they didn't recognize you they're like what are you guys doing? And you're like oh you're a couple of Jewish girls from wherever and she's like how'd you

know we were Jewish? Yeah I just immediately went back, how'd you know we were Jewish? She started laughing. And then, uh, and then I always remember the kid is like a 12 year old kid that was like, Hey, uh, are you the amazing racist? Oh yeah. While we were like on the podcast and you're just kind of like, Oh yeah. They had some little kid come up to try to say hi to me. Yeah. And you're like, keep it down buddy. Cause he's

like, are you the amazing racist? He's like, yeah, yeah, but keep it down. But it was kind of her dad was like, what? And I was like, what? And then his father. And you're like, keep it down, buddy. Because he's like, are you the amazing racist? He's like, yeah, yeah, but keep it down, buddy. It was kind of funny. And then her dad was like, center, or him. Let's see if we can find some images from there. So I traced this whole thing from travel and podcasting to what you're doing right now. Yeah, wow.

It's pretty cool. Yeah, you were on my old packets a lot. Yeah, guys, if you wanna go check that out, check it out soon, because I keep meaning to go delete all those old episodes. But it made a bunch of lists in random, of like coolest, like Runners World's coolest sports podcast of the year,

something like that. It really was. You could hear, this is when Marin showed me how to do all this stuff. He's like, no, let me sit here with him and show you how to do it. And he goes, you know, he's like, I've done one from a car before. He goes, it doesn't overpower. You can tell you're in a car, but you can still hear. You could hear the crack of the bat on a hit, but it wasn't overpowering our voice.

It was pretty interesting. You could hear the roar of the crowd, but you could hear us more. And we were still just watching the game. Yeah. Because we were fans. Because also we were like, after an ending, we were like, oh, let And we were still just like watching the game. Yeah. Because we were fans. Because also we were like, after like an ending, we were like, oh, let's put it away for a couple innings. Yeah. And watch.

Because otherwise it would have been a five, it was old baseball too, the last four and a half hours. Yeah, yeah. No timer. But yeah, that was, I trace, yeah, all, I think we are good to influence on each other. Because we both started to do, obviously, the travel stuff. And then I did the podcast stuff for a little while.

But here's the thing, why did you stop your old podcasts? It was, why do you think? I gotta start asking that more in interviews. For me, because I came from broadcasting, then I was Artie's co-host for a while, and then I was Tom Poppa's co-host for a while, and I did mine, and it was kind of like I had all the people that I wanted to have on,

and I didn't want to just keep doing it to do it. So it takes so much less pressure on me. It's more fun for me to just do this, because I haven't seen you in a while, so this is cool to catch up and just chat. I would have just gotten coffee if not. But yeah, you're pretty close. That's a reason.

Honestly, I'm a big freedom guy. It's kind of one of the most important things to me. To be able to go to Southeast Asia for months, to be able to go to Ecuador for six months. To be able to like just, I was doing a Something's Burning with Brenna Zisi and Bert, and I was saying like, we're talking about freedom in general,

and I was like, yeah, I'm very free, and Bert's like, I have as much freedom as you do, and I just started laughing, and he goes, what do you mean? And Steve goes, Bert, Ari could just turn this table over and go to the airport and leave right now. He goes, well, I have a family. He goes, right, right, which is why you don't have as much freedom as me, because you have these things.

This began to feel like a job. And once I realized, I was like, oh, all right, I got about three months to wrap this up nicely, but I'm done with it, I don't want a job. So I lost a lot of money and got more freedom. Well, that's the thing is you can't get used to the money. That's with any kind of stand up even. I remember Tosh I think told me when he first was headlining

all the improvs, it's like I'm working 45 weeks a year to pay for a house that I'm not in. So that's why he did the show. So he could be home. Yeah. And now doesn't he just surf all day now? I think, yeah. Well he's married all day now? I think, yeah. Well he's married as a kid I think at least.

But my thing was I wanted to, like I think I'm like you where we are hard workers but we need like a break. So I can work on something for three months like a script or a pilot or a special. You gotta put it away eventually. And then I just need like a month to do nothing. Yeah, you get your brain thinking again.

You need a fallow year for crops. That's like you need a year where doesn't rob the soil of something, which the soil is your mind. But you know there's a lot of people that they need like the schedule every day and I'm just not that person like that. Teach their own.

The best example was, oh man, it's these two composers, and Stravinsky I think, Igor Stravinsky, it's like a famous, and then like Handel or something. There's like two of the most famous composers. One of them did their masterpiece working every day from like nine to five for like six months, and then the other guy did it all night for 30 days.

So it's like when you have inspiration, you have to go like, I'm not somebody that can like, I'll stay up all night working on something. Because also it's like, then you're just working for the sake of work, where you're like, it's kind of like, remember when the bloggers would get angry about something? Like Lindy West would be out writing jokes,

or whatever you're into, but then it's like, ooh, this is catching on, and you're like, well, now it's next week, I have to write another one, but you're like, you're not as mad about this one. You were really worked up about the other one. Now you're just like trying to get worked up, so it's kind of empty.

Yeah, and that was a fun thing about the podcast when you have somebody that you're like, oh, I wanna have this person on just to talk to them. So there was that too. Everyone was a topic on Skeptic Tank. And at some point I'm like, I know, I wanted to learn about things in a funny way. And I, well, I've learned about drug addiction enough. I've learned about fucking hookers enough.

I've learned about, I was like, yeah, I got it. So now I'm just like, you'd be like, or someone would be like, hey, can I go in your pockets? I'm like, yeah, I don't know, figure out a topic. It will just cut this. And I'm like, yeah, I got it. So now I'm just like, you'd be like, or someone would be like, hey, can I go in your pockets? I'm like, yeah, I don't know, figure out a topic, we'll just cut this. And I'm like, well, I'm uninterested anymore. I was like, I worked at the rodeo, I'm like, yeah, sure, that'll do.

You know, and it's just like, I wasn't interested. And also, it was like a lot of things. And also I was starting to get affected by people's follower counts. I could see myself being pulled into what everyone in LA is pulled into. We're valuing humans based on their popularity instead of their actual, what they enrich your life with.

And I didn't like that at all. And I was like, I wanna get back to just who's most interesting. You are very, like I remember, cause you know when you shot your first special. Yeah, you were there. I was like the only comic there. You said put some fucking powder on your face,

you were squeaking. Yeah, cause you got brand new sneakers and your sneakers were squeaking after every joke. I was like, put something up there, it's gonna ruin every joke. Good call, good call. But that, and then I went to the first, this is not happening, and then so it went from like,

you know, I've seen this, you know, with Gaff again. I worked when he got super famous. He was a club comment. And then you got really famous. And so I saw the way that you try to navigate that because I know you hate like phoniness and you hate like people maneuvering and stuff like that. And so it was interesting to see you

navigate that whole thing. I mean, even now, because you moved to New York, you didn't really know anybody. Yeah, it seems obvious now, but Domarere was like,, because you moved to New York, you didn't really know anybody. Yeah, it seems obvious now, but Domarais was like, no, you moved from New York to LA. You're just starting to get going. Now you're moving away from LA?

That's wrong. Yeah. I don't know. I want to see new things. But it was interesting because you, and did you have the show yet? I don't know if you had the show yet. I think I had the show.

But I remember- Just the beginning. I think it was only digital. I stayed, I was at your apartment when your bed got delivered. You were like coming in. And so you didn't know anybody. You told me about the diner, because this is your diner, it closed.

Yeah, yeah, I was in your place before you were. Yeah, that's right. And then, I didn't know anybody. And then like, six months later, you had the show. Like everywhere we went, people were starting to kiss your ass and like all these people are schmoozing you. I'm like, oh, this is interesting, man.

Netflix specials 2017. Yeah, right. Right. Yeah. I let Duncan stay at my place when I went to Southeast Asia. He was the last one I saw. Oh, really? Yeah.

He was like, I want to leave LA and was like, stay here. I'm not coming back. Actually, if he wasn't staying at my place, I think two days in, I would have just turned around and gone home, because I was so scared in Myanmar. I was so lonely and so scared, but I'm like, fuck, if I go home, Duncan's gonna be there, I'm gonna be embarrassed.

I can't just. Wait, so what, wait, why? Why would I be embarrassed? I said I'm gonna go home. No, why were you gonna come home? I was so scared. It was like, this isn't the right move. This isn't the right move.

I don't know anyone here. I'm having, I was having withdrawals from social media because I locked myself out of all that. So I was having dopamine withdrawals, like, you know, medically dopamine withdrawals from that. And then like, I was like, I'm scared. I don't know where to go. I don't know anybody.

How do I even do this? I've never been anywhere. People say I'm a good traveler. I'm a terrible traveler. I'm a terrible traveler. I guess. But the, I remember you told me that you were staying at hostels so you could meet people naturally. Yeah.

Yeah. It was great. And then I started. But two days in, I was like, I'm not a very social person. But in Hong Kong, that China run, you did that one, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so the first few days, I don't wanna talk to anybody, I'm very alone.

And after about four or five days, right when I actually got to Hong Kong, actually right when I got to Beijing, it was about eight days in, and then I was starting to feel lonely enough to meet people. That's how I am. I've never felt lonely in my life

until I had two days in Japan, and I didn't do shows, didn't talk to anybody. And Japan is so quiet, like all the trains, everything. And I hadn't heard anybody laugh in like two days. Like I saw these school girls laugh and then I saw these like business guy, like bullshit laugh and that was it. So after like three days I was ready to do a show but I hadn't been lonely

you know or even needing to get on stage in forever. Yeah. Till that you get put in that position. I also want credit for making you a well more not more focused but remember when you went to Amsterdam? With you. And like, even when we were playing basketball, I was like, you had to smoke weed like every hour. And then I was like. Yeah, I would go out, like halftime I'd go smoke weed. Well, but I was like, remember we were in Amsterdam, not Amsterdam, but forget where else,

and you were like stopping, and I was like, this is like, you know, cause they I was like, this is like, you know, cause they always say like an addiction is like, if you stop what you would normally do, like if you're with a bunch of friends doing something fun and you have to quit that to do this thing, it's getting in the way. It's getting in the way.

If your friends were all having a beer and you have it with them, it's helping. So it's like. If you're leaving your friends to go get a beer, that's a problem. And then I remember that first couple days we did, Heineken factory, Bulls, all this stuff, and then we hadn't smoked weed,

and then the one day that, I think when Jessica came in, we went to like five of those places, and you had to stop like every half hour. And I'm like, you know it was much better when we were just able to go to all these places, and I feel like that affected you. Maybe you didn't see it, but I saw it because you didn't have to,

even when you were podcasting, you would have to stop. Remember? In fairness, just to defend me a little, you're 100% right, first of all. It was getting in the way. I would see it at the comedy store where everyone goes smoke weed. I'm having a fun conversation.

I'm like, well, they're all going to smoke. I gotta smoke. I'm like, I'm leaving a good conversation for this. It's an addiction. But in fairness, since I am into weed, or I was into weed, of course I wanted to see what the coffee shops looked like out there.

I wanted to see it. No, no, I wasn't, and that's probably the most, because I even hung with you, because we went to like five places in the same day. So it was like, we were all trying to handle it, but it was like, I don't know if it was before or after that, but I could tell you were just like, what I said, you were just like, yeah, we did get a lot done.

A lot more done. You could see the comparison. We went to all these places, Van Gogh, Bowles, we went to all these places, and then, when you're like, now you're slowing down. You're like, whoa, it's very evident. Which part is the distraction, you know? So I just felt like that, you know,

and it's only because you recognize it in yourself. Like if you're a person that's like, you know, when you talk to people, you go to, where was that, Appleton, Wisconsin. Yeah, I love that. They're like, we wanted to go to the, what's the magician? Houdini. We wanted to go to the Houdini Museum.

It was closed. And we're like, what else is there to do here? And they're like, well, we got a bunch of bars. It was like, so that's all you do here is just drink? So I don't know. I just felt like when you find other things that are more interesting, because we both are curious about the world

and curious about going to places, and you just don't want stuff getting away of that, you know, or distracting you. Yeah. Paul, I think this was an interesting podcast because of what we set up. So I was about to say in my head, I'm trying to be a good host,

and I'm like, well, maybe we should cover the Amsterdam part too, but we did a little bit. I'm wondering if we should cover that too, or just stay in Switzerland, and then just get back to Amsterdam another time. Well, I think this is more of like- Because this is an overall thing

about how we really started traveling. Were you a big traveler before that Montreux trip? No. Yeah, me neither. So my only trip was to, when I was in high school, our basketball team went to Ireland, which was like amazing. We got to play all these different clubs and stay with the families of the people

that we played against. I'm wondering if this trip was before or after my China trip. Do you remember? I think it might have been before. I thought the China trip was the first one, because every time I tell someone about China, I say I told my agent, I told Justin, I was like, I wanna see things, help me out.

And then I was like, get me the order, but I was like, what made me wanna see things? I think now it's this trip. I thought that was the first trip was China, but it's not, it's this, and I got home, then I told him, send me places. Yeah, because China was Turner, right? China was Turner Sparks, yeah.

He has to be, he's going to be on his podcast a bunch. He helped me a lot. He opened for my album in a National Comedy Center. To the listeners out there, an album is a... Let's see where China was on here. I think it has, so this was 2013, right? Yeah, December 2013 was Switzerland. Oh, shit. Uh, let me go year. All photos, um, by years. Here we go.

Cause I feel like you went there when it got shut down, right? 27, 28, 29, 2012, 2013. I went there before I got shut down, but 2012, let's see here. Where's China? Oh no, where's China? No, it's Runners-Easy, that's Vegas. 2014, so yeah, this trip was before. There's me in China.

That's June 2014. So this is the trip that made me go to China, that made me then keep going. Nice. This was so influential, my whole life. Yeah, me too. Just having this talk of like, it wasn't just going, it was like the mindfulness you had of like,

we should keep doing this. But even when we were- This podcast doesn't exist if not for this talk. Right, and even the, I remember having like talks with you like late at night, we were talking about where else we could go. Because Amsterdam wasn't the automatic choice, because we were just like,

because you set up the show there, like you set up Toomer. Last minute, do you remember when we went into that plum place with that big black Dutch guy said? Oh yeah. Go ahead. So we go to this bar, it's like one of those bars in the main strip in Amsterdam, and it's big African bouncer and he just looks like, I don't know if he checked our IDs but he's

just like. I don't think he did. He's like, hey, how's it going man, come on in. And then he goes, shalom my brother. To me. It was one of those like oh I didn't realize how Jewish I was. Yeah you even said why do you say that to me? You're like oh I got news for you. He was like no I already got nose for you. And then he

named your special for you Jew. Jew that's right that's right. So I mean was there anything else in Switzerland? The Lake Geneva was pretty cool. Seeing the smoke on the water was cool. We got to find all our pictures from there and then I'll give it to... Buddy, you can't lean on the camera. Well, my old thing is like, I know you're used to talking to other people, but I think people like to see how you ended up, because that's what,

everyone always asks you, like, how did you end up traveling? How did you end up? It's this, I've quoted you so many times. In so many interviews I've quoted you. Really? Oh, yeah. Because that's why I always want,

like you said for the first time, the Myanmar thing, you said you were scared. And so that's what keeps most people from traveling. So I was interested in seeing what actually scared you. Because you did all this stuff. Montreux was set up for us. So no fear there. Plus Switzerland, it's not a scary vibe.

But it's set up for us. They have a hotel waiting for us. They're picking us up from the airport. It's all set up. Amsterdam, you set up. My brother was already speaking French and German then. So he's out there. So he was like, I'll show you the train to take to meet your buddy.

And also people speak English. China was even set up. Turner picked me up from the airport. He told me, hey, it's all safe here, there's no violent crime here. The punishments are too harsh, the embarrassments too harsh. I'm like, oh great, well I'll see you later in that case. But it was set up.

And me and my was the first one not set up. I'm landing with no one to greet me. On a language and a culture I don't understand. I've never been a Buddhist before besides Duncan. And so then it's like, yeah, I'm frightened. Yeah, it's not something I would pick. You know why I picked that one? No.

So I narrowed down to Southeast Asia, to region. So could have gone to South America over here, decided Southeast Asia. I wanted a cheap place, because I didn't have a lot of money. I had some, I was doing okay, but not a lot. Didn't have great negotiators for my show. So, I was like, it's Southeast Asia or South America,

or Africa, but I'm way too frightened of that xenophobia. So then I was like, I researched which, not licenses, which visas you need ahead of time and which you can get upon landing. Thailand you can get upon landing. Vietnam you need it ahead of time. But Vietnam they go, okay, you have six months to use this for one month.

For one month. So anytime in the next, so great. So I had the ones I needed. Myanmar I think was ahead of time. It doesn't matter, but I had all of them. I had Laos I never got to, Cambodia, Vietnam, Philippines, I had them all. That's the one we always talk about, Bhutan.

But then all I did was when it was time to leave, didn't have my flight yet, I was gonna get a one-way flight. A few days out, I just looked at who has the best weather. And Vietnam was like rain every day, so I'm like skip. Myanmar was the whole 10 days of clear. So I'm like, okay, that one. That's so crazy, because I would always think for you,

especially with the drug stuff. Yeah, there's drugs up there. Yeah, but the places that you can really get in trouble. Like I remember, I went to. Well, the Golden Triangle is like right there Between China where is it? It's like Laos Thailand Myanmar, or is it like up here? There's a Golden Triangle, right? What is that? What does that mean? Like I think opium or something. Oh really? Yeah

What is the Golden Triangle Which by the way I was told by someone close to the situation that... Parts of Burma which is Myanmar, China, Laos and Thailand. Quincy Jones, they asked him to do a song about garbage. Because you know he did the Sanford and Son theme. Oh that Quincy Jones. So he wrote it on Opium. And if you listen to it you're like, I can see that. No, no that's not.

It's so, yeah that's it. Damn it. It's great man. Might be the best TV theme song ever. He had a lot of them. You welcome, Opium. Yeah, you welcome, Opium. Yeah, so it's all there.

But I remember going, like I went to Kuwait. Wow. This is why I say he'll be back 100 times on this podcast. We stayed in this, we stayed in this like five star hotel, and then we're like, oh, let's get a couple drinks. Cause it was for the USO, so they were putting us up. It was like Tinashe, some pop singer was with us. And so like, we'll get a couple drinks,

and they said, alcohol is punishable death by hanging. I was like, or Diet Coke. I'll take Diet Coke. I was just thinking maybe, but I'm not much of a boozer to be honest. So that's what scares me is like a place like that has, there's no speed limit, but like you can get killed for having a beer, you know? Yeah, exactly.

Like that's why China still, China and Russia still kind of freak me out a little bit. Those are probably the only two I'm scared of. Yeah, but I smoked weed in China. They told me like the cops don't know what it smells like because it's so, it's such a hard crime and the locals don't do it, that they don't even know what it smells like.

They're like, you could smoke in front of cops. Yeah, but see, you're a little nuts that way. I'm a little nuts that way. Where did you actually get caught though in Australia? Yeah, in Australia at the landing. So what happened? By a drug dog. The guy let me out of it.

I had this not happening story. The drug dog just sat and just stared at my bag. And I was like, oh boy. The drug dog just sat and just stared at my bag. And I was like, oh boy. And then I was like, get out of here. He just wouldn't go, he's trained to not go. He smelled weed in there. Oh wow.

And then the border patrol came by and was like, hi, hello sir, can I talk to you? I was like, yeah sure, trying to play it cool. My heart's going a mile a minute. I mean, it's like, I'm going to jail, jail. You can't traffic. It's a different thing than doing it. Trafficking, so in China,

it's trafficking is punishable by death, trafficking. Getting it is you might get kicked out or whatever, but trafficking, so they say if you get caught having a shipment come into China, they always try to shoot their way out. Because they're like, if I get caught, I'm hung. So I may as well shoot all these cops, that's shoot their way out. Because they're like, if I get caught, I'm hung. So I may as well shoot all these cops, that's my only way out.

And he goes, do you have any drugs in there? I was like, no. He goes, do you have like an apple or like a banana or something in there? He might be smelling fruit. And I was just like trying to carefully think my way out of it. And I must have paused for like 15 seconds.

And I'm like, yes. And he goes, okay, all right, enjoy your day. Oh, good. And I was like, I just had all my fucking cigars taken from Cuba. I didn't know I'd talk my way out of that one. Oh yeah, you just went there, right? Just got back on Saturday.

Should have, I could have talked my way out of that one. Should have kept those cigars. I had a good time. Paul, was there anything else in Switzerland? The raclette, we got a couple of raclette. Because that was such a cool dish. So it's the beautiful woman who's running the thing takes us up to that room

and they just have all these dudes with these different plates. And they have this, it's almost like a cartoon size half of wheel of cheese. And it's just a dude scraping it. Yeah, like that. And so underneath that, that bar is just heat. So it turns, goes under, it gets bubbly.

Yeah, and he's scraping it onto like, it's always like meat, right? It's like salami. No, meat, those Vidalia onions, salami, like rolled up. It's like, oh, here we go. And then it just peels to the meat. Look at that. That's it.

And they just spread it right onto that. Yeah, it was so good. So I had it with my brother and his family afterwards, and they do it this way, where they have it on a little tray like that, and they put it right underneath. Oh, but look at that. They're scraping it.

That's the scrape. Yeah, that's the guy. Our dude did the scrape. That's the best. Did you ever come with me to Raclette here? No. There was a store, a restaurant called Raclette. You told me about it.

It was on Avenue A, and then I saw it take ads out in the back of cabs, and suddenly it went to 12th, and it became bigger. They had two chairs, no one was in it, and then they had like 10 tables. And man, on a cold day, me and Renazee's got, well, he's had food poisoning, and I'm like,

then why, how come me and your wife aren't sick? And he goes, oh yeah, good question. I'm like, I don't, he's just got sick, buddy. Yeah, they had a raclette place, and they go, second scrape? And you're like, yes, I don't know, you just got sick, buddy. Yeah, they had a raclette place. And they go, second scrape? And you're like, yes, I would love a second scrape. But man, you got the poops after that. So much cheese.

But that was so, just being in Switzerland. Eating. And it was like drinking Guinness in Ireland. It was just the best. Yeah, buddy, I would always have raclette again. If I see it, I'm just like, it was such a, it's like what grilled cheese is. It's what do they call that kind of food?

Grilled cheese and tomato soup. They call it like a comfort food. Yeah. This is such a comfort food. Hot cheese. It's like the- That's what the plate would look like. Fidelia onions, a little one of those,

whatever pickles, gherkin pickles, and then some stuff under there. Some, wow. Well, do you ever have those things where it's like, whatever pickles, gherkin pickles, and then some stuff under there. Wow. Well, do you ever have those things where it's like, like with cigars, I'm kind of like that too, where it's like, wouldn't it be nice to have a cigar after the show? And just thinking about it makes you feel better. Like that's what I think about with a Rocklet.

I'm just like, if I just think about having it, I get happier. Wow. Even if it's not in reach, I just think about, I could get Rocklead after this. What else did we do there? Montreux, I wanna see the, it was the, what's his name from Queen? Oh, Freddie Mercury.

So there's the statue. And like Bowie. We have a picture in front of that. Don't we? We must. Yeah, I do. You do. Look at that. That's him.

So the whole thing that's interesting about this is like Freddie Mercury is like a real, I don't know about you, but I loved Freddie Mercury before all the movies and all the shit. Oh yeah. Dude, did you wear that on purpose? Oh yeah.

No, I didn't actually. Queen tour 1980. I actually have the, I have that t-shirt with him on the front doing that pose. Wow, that's cool. But I remember, I always thought he was like underrated. I mean I had the Queen greatest hits, right? That was the album everybody had, Queen's greatest hits on cassette right but as far as like lead singer

you're so underrated because you see him at Wembley or whatever and you're like With those with that white tank top and like white tight and you're like right. Oh, this is the definition of rockstar Yeah, and he's just you know showman, but also like Became like he really wanted to be like an opera singer. And so he wrote an opera for this famous opera singer and he got to do a duet with her. Like in Barcelona, remember the Olympics in Barcelona? He wrote the themes, like the, I guess the anthem,

like Barcelona. Yeah, that's the statue right there, man. And then the smoke on the water. Yeah. So that the casino where the recording studio is caught on fire. And so, uh, who's the group? Deep purple, Deep purple wrote smoke on the water about that fire images, smoke on the water. because I want to see, because it was smoky, the lake was smoky all the time.

And we couldn't decide if it was smoke from the fire at the recording studio or what he was singing about, or if it was just this smoke that would come up from like the mist that would come up. But the famous thing is like, the Jazz Festival in Montreux is like, Massive. If you go to like Apple Music,

there's like 9,000 albums recorded live at the Montreux Jazz Fest, you know? Like everybody was there. And this is right here is, that's the, wow, yeah, it was like this smoke would come up. It was like mist. There was a castle we went to where you get to poop right into the water through a hole.

Remember that? Did you do the train thing or no? The train? Yeah. It's like a train. We went up to the castle, it was on the corner, and there was a hole where you, it's just a regular toilet,

and it would just go down and just plop right into Lake Geneva. What are you doing? You farting? What are you doing? Getting farting? What are you doing? You want a cigar? Wow. What else do you remember about Switzerland?

I'm sorry we got so sidetracked with the other stuff, but like it was all important stuff next podcast We're just gonna get to like just Kuwait or just whatever well Switzerland also we met what do we remember? Oh, yeah We met those sketch guys That was interesting cuz they told us the BBC. Go ahead Oh, it was so it's a group of British dudes who basically they were like the jackass of the UK. Yeah they said one interesting thing I remember where they were like, so we're on the BBC, which is a state funded media, but we make fun of the government and our sketch show. So it's interesting that in the UK, they pay you to make fun of them. But the cool thing was, is all of their

But the cool thing was is all of their pranks started with the idea of basically if you have a workman's vest on, like an orange or a yellow vest, you can get away with murder. So all of their pranks were like they went to the palace in London or whatever. They went to any place they went to They could just start doing stuff, you know It's almost like a Banksy thing where if you had like an orange vest they they wouldn't even Bother you if you were like painting or doing something So that was like all of their all of their pranks were based on like them Just doing stuff in public and not getting in trouble for it. Mm-hmm. Yeah, they had that here I think was I'm not getting in trouble for it. Yeah, they had that here. I think it was, I'm not getting the name,

I think it was called Art in Art Places or Art in Something Places, and these guys would get work vests and change out the bus stops, all use the same key to put those big photos in there. Oh, oh, okay. And so once they realized that, they were like, we got someone who used to work there,

we copied their key, we all made it, they put on work vests, and then daylight, with cops going by, they would just change it out to their own art. Well that is smart. Yeah, and then they close it, and no one would even thought it was wrong. They'd leave it there for a month.

But it's like even if a guy in a yellow vest walked in your building, you'd be like, oh he's doing something. Yeah exactly, you just trust him. Forget it, art in some places, art in some, I used to follow him online. So yeah, there was that, I remember those guys were cool enough. Yeah.

I remember meeting Loiso and this one other guy I became friendly with but I forgot his name now. Yeah, they were like, there was a South African, like French comic show. So that was like the big show the night before, they were in the big theater, we were just in that little room. Yeah.

And I've got tape of that, too. That used to be on one of my promo things, you introducing me. In Montreux with the banquet hall? This next guy is on my basketball team in the Comedians Basketball League in Los Angeles. He's a starting point guard. And despite looking fat and out of shape, he's pretty good.

He's also been on the Craig Ferguson show multiple times, which you guys probably have never heard of, but it's a television show. It comes on at about 10.45 a.m. here. It's a late night program in America and it's pretty good and he's done it a bunch. Ladies and gentlemen, Pistamistic, please give it up for Mr. Paul Morrissey everybody. Let him hear it. Let him hear it. Yeah.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I don't even know what else there was in Switzerland. I mean, I went skiing in Zermatt, which is crazy. I mean, it's some of the best skiing. But you don't even remember getting hurt? I didn't. I didn't, it was later. I had that thing from skiing in,

you were right to warn me, from skiing in, I've only broken something twice. It was then in Whistler, after Vancouver, went to Whistler, cracked myself, then I had to broken something twice. It was then in Whistler after Vancouver, went to Whistler, cracked myself, then I had to come back here. The guy was experimenting on me, Canadian fucking healthcare. He was like trying to show his,

he goes, we don't do these hard casts anymore, but since this is in American, he didn't say that, but like we're gonna do one for him. So they gave me a hard cast, he goes, keep it dry. I'm like, keep it dry, I'm going to New York in February. I'm like, keep it dry. They're like, plastic it dry, I'm going to New York in February. I'm like, keep it dry. They're like, plastic bag. And then I got back and the doctors here cut it off

and gave me a whatever, but they gave me one of those wheelie things. That was then. And then what was the other, remember? Broke my ankle, broke my wrist, racing O'Neil. So that was the other one that I picked you up from the doctor's office. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I'm instrumental in your life, man. You are, buddy. Yeah. But,, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm instrumental in your life, man. You are, buddy. Yeah. But oh, yeah, by the way, so have you been doing anything athletic lately? Like, what do you do? No basketball, no anything like that? I was skating a couple times, but not enough.

Well, if you want to play in the basketball game Sunday. New York Comedy Festival. Yeah, they're doing it, LaGuardia College. Oh really? Damn, no I'm leaving, I'm going to visit my parents, I've come back Sunday. Oh you're playing in it? I played in the Netflix one.

What people don't know is, Paul Morris, he played Division II five years? Well I played at every level. Yeah, but basketball, he was great. He looks like a piece of shit. Like anyone who sees this guy. Did you notice I lost weight though? No, because you're still fat.

So you haven't gotten out of your category. I know that. I think my face looks thinner now. Let's wrap this up. Let's think what else you did in... Switzerland. Well, so for me, I can even, I'll show you the video in a minute,

but so you could go in the studio where David Bowie and Queen recorded Under Pressure, which is now a museum in that part of the casino. So not only do they have all the lyric sheets, all Freddie Mercury stuff, but you can go in the actual studio and mix the sound from the album. What? Yeah. So I have video from that. That's fucking awesome. Yeah. By the way, check out Paul Morrissey on a, where's your social media? Paul Morrissey, Paul's website.com. Paul has a website, that's right.

Paulhasawebsite.com. That's Ashtray's Foundation Cigars, they gave me one. Feel like the Celtics just won. Red Auerbach. Do you know the whole thing behind the cigar? It's interesting. So basically, whenever the Celtics would win, Red Auerbach was the coach.

And he would light up a cigar. And people thought it was at the end of the game as a celebratory thing. But what it was was, let's say you're the Lakers, and you cut the lead from like 20 to like eight, and there's two minutes left, and all of a sudden you look over the bench and Red lights up the cigar.

He's rubbing it in like we have this. He's like. That was Steph Curry's version of this. You don't have a fucking chance, yeah. Don't kid yourself, it's over. Oh no, he's lighting it? Yeah, it's a family. Imagine that, you just look over the guy and he's just like

confident good luck. Wow and he's like I still have an airport leave with two minutes left you guys have lost. This is the Celtics man isn't that cool yeah I never thought of it that way I always thought it was like in the locker room at the end. So wait what you have video that your picture that of the music thing? Yeah, that's pretty cool to see all that This is me mixing Montreux studio bring up freddy Bring out the drums I know, I know, I know that it's true. Yes, it's really back to me.

That was pretty good. So wait, you're mixing however you want? Yeah, you can just do the different tracks. Like the drums are on this one and the... That's pretty cool. Yeah, yeah. That was fun. At this legendary place. No one understood. It's like this legendary like record... People go there on vacation like let's spend a month or two out there,

get some air, look at the mountains, and make some masterpieces. Yeah. So great. Oh, there's us at the baseball game. That's it. No, no, no, that's a different one. See, look at my face there. You don't think I look different now?

You're a fat fuck there. You're disgusting. I still have that hat. No, that's not that game. That's a different game. That's not the game for the. That's when Kareem was on my flight. Was I with you?

I saw Kareem on a flight. Did you? Yeah. Was I with you? Here's the, remember that? flight. Did you? Yeah. Was I with you? Here's the, remember that? Tailgate. Who is that? Is that Fahim in the bottom middle? Fahim. Fahim, Kareem, Fat Renezisi.

And we... You, thinner, me, hairer. Remember we, you guys paid this guy to like party in his house. It was his driveway. It was great. And remember he like asked us for beers after like. Yeah, was like, can I get one? I'm like, oh, yeah, I guess. He was just like, hey, cool guys.

I'm like, we paid you 50 bucks. Oh yeah, there's your flip phone. Is that, I missed that shirt. I lost it somewhere in Ecuador and I'm so mad about it. I think that's spring training though, right? That's spring training, that might be Tampa, where Tampa's actually gonna play this year at the spring spring training. That's spring training, that might be Tampa, where Tampa's actually gonna play this year at the spring training site.

That's the one, that's us. Anyway, down there a little bit is when I was like, this is the year we're definitely gonna win. Is the year they stole it from us? Houston stole it from us? I was like, for Brody, Brody just died. We took a picture of spring training. I'm like, this is our year.

Me and Larritz. Yeah, that was cool. That was when we were still doing. I gotta get my hair back. I gotta get surgery and get some hair. What is this, you just searched for me? Yeah, I told you it was a... Those are the girls!

Yeah, that's the podcast. Those are the girls, how do you know a Jewish? Two Jewish girls sitting behind us. Oh my God, what are you doing? Was that what Instagram looked like back then? Yeah, it's wild. That's us outside. I had to make a decision to get a jersey.

It was either Andujar or Judge. They were both rookies. We didn't know who was gonna be better. Was it Andujar? Who was the other option I had? Oh, was it the catcher? Yeah. There was someone else who was like, ooh, and he was in the- option I had? Oh, was it the catcher? Yeah. There was someone else who was like,

was like, ooh, and he was in the- Matt Sanchez? He had some votes for rookie of the year. Hi guys, let me interrupt today's episode of UB Trippin to deliver a service announcement from the podcast itself, UB Trippin. Juan Soto, go fuck yourself. Now let's get back to the episode. Oh, there's you Amsterdam.

Where's that in Amsterdam? That was like our hotel lobby or something. Wow. Still have those socks. You do? Yeah. I saw them yesterday. Damn, that was... That's the squad with their Snuggies. I gave everybody Snuggies.

And that's where Jeff D Die, we were waiting to play. He told me some story about stealing, what's his name? Jersey. Jersey. Yeah. Yeah. And I was like, bro, I have a storytelling show coming. I would love you to tell that story on there. It was just like a story from the sidelines. Adam Ray, ball hog. I'm glad he's doing better now. Now he's sharing the ball. He's having guests on. then. It was like, Oh, the black hole of Adam Ray. Turn around, double team jumpers all the time. And we almost saved him from like getting murdered because Willie Mack would have killed him. What about this?

Yeah, that's me after one nothing to Nick Yusef. I didn't eat breakfast. I was so done. And you didn't have socks. Didn't have socks playing Chuck Dalers. I took it eat breakfast. I was so done. And you didn't have socks? Didn't have socks. I was playing Chuck Dalers. I took it too lightly. No shirt. I had the referee.

In West Hollywood, I came back in that game hard. And then you did. You had like five shots in a row. Yeah. And then Nick was like, oh boy. He'd already lit the cigar. OK. Let's wrap this up.

Let's wrap this up. This is for a different thing. Anything else with Switzerland that we're missing? Switzerland. The people were nice enough. The food was that. It was my first time gone somewhere like that. Not in Israel with family. So it was like, everything was new and unique.

We didn't leave the confines of there, of Montreal, but it was like, people seemed nice enough, I think. Yeah. I don't remember if it's expensive or not. It was a little French. Little French for sure. I but it was like, people seemed nice enough, I think. Yeah. I don't remember if it's expensive or not. It was a little French. Little French for sure. I think stuff was expensive, but we, that was the other great thing is that

when you get hooked up like that, all the meals were taken care of. Right, so we could eat, the glue line and shit like that, I was like, all right, we had to pay for that, but it wasn't much. Yeah, I mean, they had the festival going on, so it was like, we have this dinner set up for you guys

at this place or that place. So like, great, okay. Yeah, I mean, when had the festival going on, so it was like, we have this dinner set up for you guys at this place or that place. So like, great, okay. Yeah, I mean, when you're poor, where's the free meal is always. It's not even like, I don't feel like going back. Like, we have to get back. We're getting the meal. And also, wasn't there like five industry people?

It was like as many industry guys as comics that were just gravy training that trip. God, it was fun. That was so fun. Remember there was the guy from New York Comedy Club or the Stand Up New York? He was like the Booker at Stand Up New York. He was supposed to be one of the guys.

Donnie. Then there was another guy from Daily Motion or whatever. There was five industry guys that were just like, I'm getting a free trip too. Yeah, why not, why not? And that's my advice to anybody, if they fly you out for work, tell them like, hey, can you fly me back from Germany?

Hey, can you fly me, which I did another time, flew back from Berlin from another place. Yeah. We don't care. We can have a flight there and a flight back, whatever. Just let us know the date. Especially if you're going that far. Yeah, go somewhere else. But what's your longest? right there on a flight back, whatever. Just let us know the date. Especially if you're going that far.

Yeah, go somewhere else. But what's your longest? Or say stay an extra week and then fly back from even that same city. But like I know I'm supposed to be there for two days for a conference. So I'm supposed to be there Monday and Tuesday. You're gonna fly back Wednesday.

Can you fly back the next Wednesday? And you're on your own there, but you got there. Yeah. What's my what? What were you gonna say? What's your, cause I do have a, as much as I love traveling, I have a max of time I want this trip to be.

What's your max to be away? I mean, the dream is never come home. But like if you go to Australia, what's the premium amount of time you would be down there? I gotta be there for a month. Yeah? Gotta be. I'm going all the way to Australia.

I think a month is too long. I did the Great Ocean Road, I was able to do things. When I go to Europe, it's a four to six week thing and I only do Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. I don't do Monday, Tuesday, Wednesdays. Yeah. I want the option of staying in that city longer or go to the next city earlier.

I still have this thing where even coming home for like a day refreshes me. Oh, I don't get clear in my brain until about 12 days in. Yeah. And then I don't feel as attached to this place I was. I feel floating. That's a feeling I like. Yeah, because I just did Australia. So like the first, I did like four days in Sydney and

I was just getting into the groove and then when I went to Melbourne That was like amazing and they just kept adding more and more shows. You're never Australian money. Do you? Bring me back. No, I Just traded in actually this is my first trip when I went to Australia in June that I never touched an Australian bill. It's so credit card forward. Yeah. I never touched it.

I wanna get one for the wall. I'm trying to get all these places that the podcast has been. I got Canadian money. I got Canadian money. They don't love it in Cuba by the way. They're really way rather American. Yeah, cause Canadians can go there all the time

for like spring break and stuff. Yeah, they're like, no, Canadian's not worth the most, no, I know, it's.71 to the dollar, like.5. We don't want it. Well, even Australia is like, they really try to ream you on that. I think it's 61 or 70, something like that.

It really is like a tough. Wait, hold on. Let's finish up Switzerland. This podcast, it's an hour long podcast. It's probably been over two like a tough. Wait, hold on. Let's finish up Switzerland. This podcast, it's an hour long podcast. It's probably been over two and a half. So, I don't remember anything else in Switzerland unless you do. I remember the castle a little bit.

We're gonna have to go through our pictures and give them to this guy to get as much as we possible. And we'll have, yeah, we'll have some video too. Well, some videos. You remember anything about your show? Because you just hosted, yeah. I hosted, I remember being good enough, good, decent crowd, but nothing like, wow, what a time.

Just like, it was fine. But it was supposed to be like, here's our, did you ever feel like these people have no idea where I am? I think I had two fans. I thought I had two people, a couple showed up, and they're like, we know you. The rest are just like, heard Americans are here. Which is also a big, it's changed now,

because comedy's a lot more popular. That used to be the main credit. In Australia, all the credits were from America. That was like, woo, I'll go see that. Now it's like, you gotta have a name. When I was going to Australia, I was the only one going. Oh no, I mean, besides like, like Jim, not Jim Jeffries, but like Jimmy Carr, Sloss. There's a few guys who would like go.

Yeah. Russell, obviously. Well, Arj lives there. Arj lives there, Eddie Iff lived there. But like other people would go like, it's like that's too far to go. You can't even make as much as Kansas City. Why would you go?

Yeah, yeah. Now everybody goes. So here's the question I ask everybody, two questions. It's travel tips, just general travel tips, or specifically about Switzerland, and what country's gnawing on your mind next? Gnawing on my mind? Like where do you wanna go? Well, I think travel tips is like,

if you learn how to pack light, and it did take me years like even for that trip I think we did get luggage and overpack check bags And to take a train was such a fucking lugging it around shit, which is harder now I yeah, that's what you have to think about is like when you're changing hotels for a month trip Do you want four bags with you, all that kind of shit. So I'm good now where if I go somewhere for two days, I still need my carry-on and my backpack, but if I go for like two weeks, I can pack the same amount.

Like I'm pretty good about that. And it takes a long time to be like, oh shit, I should have brought that or. You have to be okay with washing your socks or underwear in a sink. Like once in a while, where they're gonna get pretty clean with just like dish soap or something. Like get them clean enough so you can re-wear them once.

And do you wear, so I pack, I'm a sneaker guy, so the easiest Nikes to pack are Jordan 1s, low top. Lows, yeah. And you can pack your socks inside. Shove those in, absolutely. That's a good travel tip. Fill up your sneakers. Yeah, I travel.

Especially if you bring extra, a lot of people don't. I would not. I bring the shoes I'm wearing, maybe flip flops, and maybe hiking shoes. I wouldn't take my hiking boots anywhere. Even if I need them, it's too big.. I wouldn't take my hiking boots anywhere. Even if I need them, it's like, it's too big.

Or I'll wear the boots on the airplane. But generally, the pants I'm wearing, the shoes I'm wearing because those are big, big, big space items. Yeah. And then as far as like what country's next. Yeah, what do you think? Do you have plans? I saw, no, I don't.

I saw that Ne Nate Craig did Denmark and when I was in Japan, there was a bunch of people from Denmark and the guy was like, hey you do really well in Denmark, you should come, you know, we're big comedy fans. They are, they're decent comedies. You've been there? Yeah, me and Bobby Kelly went for a festival,

Copenhagen Comedy Festival. Oh yeah. It was a one year festival. We met R.E.L. John there, this guy who started Icelandic Comedy. Oh, okay. It ruled, went to Noma, that crazy, like the best restaurant in the world

for three out of four years. Oh, really? Yeah, we got in, they were like, ooh, Americans, like we'll bump you to the top of the wait list. What was the show like though? Was it? Decent, kind of a movie theater place.

But I've gone back to Copenhagen, and by the way also, excuse me if I'm, I'll leave Spain out, but they might be best weed in Europe. Yeah? Yeah, better than Amsterdam, because Amsterdam became a bit cheap, because it's like for tourists that come in and out, they don't need whatever, but Christiania is like,

it was great, it was great. What would you suggest, because you know my list, where should I go? You would love, because you're not like an adventure traveler. I mean, you're not going to Afghanistan to meet with the ISIS and talk to them. That's what I mean by adventure travelers,

like danger travelers. Oh no. But the trip we had in Amsterdam, you could have that in Copenhagen. Go visit some old sites, beautiful museums, Kristanja you have to go to, it's the most amazing anarchist village. Yeah.

It's like a free, it's free, it's a free standing like village inside, inside in Copenhagen. The bikes, the bike lanes, everybody knows how to use real fast, the canals, you would love it. But what show, like, so there's no comedy clubs. There might be, I don't know. What about Germany?

That's the other one. I mean, Berlin has a great comedy scene. Yeah? Great, Amsterdam has the best in Europe. Right. Amsterdam, and everybody's filling up shows now. Amsterdam, just the house shows, pack out every night. Yeah. Amsterdam has the best in Europe. Amstam, and everybody's filling up shows now. Amstam, just the house shows, pack out every night. Amstam has the best.

Germany has an amazing one, and it's people from all over the world performing. So in July, July I was on Jim Jeffries' podcast, and we were talking about traveling. Jim, come do this podcast. And he was like, you've never been to Australia? I was like, no.

He's like, here's what you do. Go to Melbourne Comics Lounge. Comics Lounge is one of the best clubs in the world. Or the Sydney Comics Store, and then Brisbane Sit Down. So I ended up doing two of those on this trip. Did you do Sit Down? No, didn't have enough time. Brisbane is for trash people.

But you gotta lean into it and be it. Yeah, yeah. Everyone said you gotta experience it. Like even the guys at Melbourne are like, you should go up there just to see what the people are like. You gotta start pronouncing Melbourne right. Oh, Mel-bone? Melbourne.

It's B-I-N. Melbourne. Melbourne, Melbourne, real quick. Alright. Or actually it's M-E-L-B-a-p-o-s-t-o-r-y-n, like Melbourne. Yeah. But yeah, you can't say Melbourne, you're embarrassing yourself and you're embarrassing me,

and you're actually, it's rude to this podcast. No, I make fun of them for how they say no. Say it. They say, ner. Nye, nye. They add an O and an R to it. That's so much, that's so much. Like, are you not done saying no yet?

You're still going? Well, those are good, Paul. This is a great one. It really reminded me of a fucking great trip. And how we all started. And how we started this. Yeah, this is a great journey. How do you feel after that, having been all these places? How are you feeling now looking back at this now?

Like, I'm feeling really reminiscent. Yeah, and that's why when we talked about doing this, I'm just like, man, we did, because not only we do a lot of Yankee stuff and we've done a lot of podcasts, but then the travel stuff we really bond on because I get excited for you, you know. Yeah, I get excited for you too.

Yeah. When you're like, I'm here, I'm like, whoa. And then I'll like leave and I'll go look up that country. Yeah. And look up different things there. It's like not for any reason, it just gets me to go wiki it. and then I'll like leave and I'll go look up that country and look up different things there. It's like not for any reason, it just gets me to go wiki it.

And I remember when you were in Romania, there was like a sound tech that I was working with, it was from Romania. And he's like, which place is he working at? And he like looked it up and he told me, he's like, yeah, yeah, it's mostly DJs there, but yeah, it would be cool to do a live show there. So the underground scene, the weird thing about Romania,

I should say this, but I've met the underground music scene. In Berlin, it's electronic, 100%. That's the king. It's post-punk in Romania, in Bucharest, at least. It's post-punk. So these underground clubs where you do drugs, it's like Suzy Sue and the Banshees, that kind of sound. Yeah, which is like very interesting.

And I met a club owner there and he's like, oh my God, you're from America? And like, yeah, I'm like, keep in mind, this was a few years ago, Tony hadn't blown up yet, Hinchcliffe. And they go, we wanna bring one comic out here. And we, I don't know if you know him, but we'd love to get him.

And I was like, who? He goes, do you ever watch Kill Tony? I'm like, yeah, I've been on there. And he goes, do you know William Montgomery? He's our favorite. We'd love to get him out here. And I'm like, I'll talk to him. That's hilarious.

Yeah, Romania, Eastern Europe, I wanna explore all of. Yeah. It's so, they're wildlings. They are untamed out there. But as long as like they understand somewhat, I mean, you have the show, so they watch stuff. No, they speak English. And at this point now the internet has brought everybody together. They all know what American comedy is. It's the king.

And they want to be part of just an American style comedy. They just don't get it as much. So they'd love it. That's why you should do Japan, man. Why? Because they have that English speaking club. Have you been there? No. It's definitely on my list.

You would love it, man. It's so different from any other place in Asia. It's just so unique. It's number one in Asia. What's that? Number one Asian. Number one Asian? As ranked by Asians.

Is it? Yeah. Well it's just so like. Even the Chinese, like we hate them because of how many we had from them, but meanwhile at the same time, like they're like, no, they're better than us. But it's like if, like, it's his own thing,

you know what I mean? Like they just come up with like, they have all these like mascots that are famous for like no reason and like All this art is just creative and then they have Godzilla out of nowhere that like that's the perfect thing is like Where does Godzilla come from? You know, like that's just some where's that myth? It's just like on top of a building downtown They have that Shibuya crossing where it's like the busiest crossing in the world.

I wanna go to that. That's where the club is. I wanna go to that, I wanna get, did you get shoved into a train with like a sardine with a pole? No, but. I wanna do that. But they tell you to shut up on the plane, or on the train, which is great.

Like I took the train from the airport. Jews would love that place. Yeah. You have to have headphones on, Jews would love that place. Yeah. You have to have headphones on. You can't be on speakerphone. And if you're talking too loud, they'll tell you no talking. Different than China. Yeah.

Somebody's just going, bling, bling, bling, bling, bling. And you're like, dude, what the fuck? And everyone else is like, what do you matter? I'm like, bling, bling, bling, bling, bling. The only bad thing was I watched Oppenheimer on the flight to Japan. All right. And I didn't do it on purpose, but I was just like, Oh, this is weird. And then I told them I felt bad and then they haven't released Oppenheimer in

Japan yet. And so I'm like, well, you guys know how it ends, right? And like my grandfather did. All right, Paul, this is fucking great. Yeah, good catching up, man. Good catching up. Congratulations on everything, man. Thank you. This new podcast. I mean, I've had people like, why are you doing,

like Rogan's like, I'm like, dude, I don't think you understand how much I love hearing about this, about travel. This one obviously we both did, but like, just hearing about people's I love hearing about this, about travel. This one obviously we both did, but just hearing about people's trips, hearing about your trips in general, I'm like engrossed. Tell me about your kid and I'm tuning out.

You know? I mean people do that all the time, it's like, oh, they learn to say these words, I'm just like, oh, I don't give a fuck. Tell me about a trip to Kuwait and I am in. So whatever I got less interested in Skeptic Tank, I don't give a fuck. You're telling me about a trip to Kuwait and I am in. Yeah. So whatever I got less interested in Skeptic Tank, I'm far more interested in this.

So I'll tell you the first, and you can put this in or not, so the first night I go to Australia, I'm doing Sydney this happy endings comedy club, which is where there's like this famous thing I'm doing Sydney this happy endings comedy club, which is where there's like this famous thing that Sinatra got trapped in Australia. Did you hear about this? No.

So they love him in Australia. He went down there and then he was dating Mia Farrow or somebody at the time and all this paparazzi was following him around. And he's like, you broads are like hookers. You do this for money, like saying it to the reporters. And so the unions got all mad at him. So they're like, we're not even going to gas up his plane.

He's going to be stuck here. So he had to apologize to the union head just to get out of Australia, get out of Australia. But it was three days. And he was he was stuck in Melbourne, snuck to Sydney, and obviously had some kind of mafia connection or something. So he stayed in some plush hotel for three days. But for three days, he snuck to this jazz bar and did shows. And that's where I performed.

Wow, cool. So I's where I performed. Wow. Cool. So I'm doing, I'm doing shows here. There's two like beautiful blondes in the front row. And I think they might be a couple. Yeah. And they're a little off. And so, but fine. And then we, we go upstairs.

I'm with the other kind of closing act and we're just talking to them. And they're just telling us that like they used to date the same guy and they became roommates, blah, blah, blah. And then I get the lowdown that they've been on ketamine the whole time. And so they're like, hey, do you want to come to dinner with us? And it was a hard thing to find something to eat late. So they're like, no, this place, Cafe Roma, it's an Italian place, it's amazing, in Sydney. Oh yeah, I think I've heard of it. It was served until like one o'clock, so they're like, come with us.

So we all get drinks, we all hang out, and then I'm like, what's the deal here? What's going on? So ends up like they pay for the meal, both like kiss me as they're leaving and then I went back to my hotel. I was like, this is my first night in Australia. This is fucking amazing. You just got treated by a fucking Kettaboo Junkie?

Yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Damn, all right, well Paul Morrissey, check him out. Paul has a website.com, his website for all his tour dates. And follow him on Twitter, we got 10.4 thousand followers. Let's see if we can get you to 20 thousand. Yeah, that'd be great. Instagram.com slash Paulhasawebsite.

Yeah, oh, there you are with Papa, the comedy store. Where's that? Oh, that's Australia. Yeah. Yeah, great club too. But man, those comics lounge guys. Yeah, they're the best. Grant and Dan.

They love you, man. I love them too. I love them too. I went to State of Origin with them this year. I went to a Little League game for one of their nephews. Wait, what was the one they told? Under 11. They told me the story about you wearing the jersey.

Yeah. And like some guy, like he was a fan, but then he saw you were wearing the jersey and got mad at you. Cause he was wearing a Queensland jersey. Yeah, yeah. And it was like, fuck off, I don't care. And then, and then he, they took me to that,

that what you call it because of you. What, what? Oh, yeah, that little diner place. The late night fucking rest stop place, right? Yeah, yeah. Where all the fucking workers are. I got this cup from State of Origin. It's in the gift bag they give you with the tickets.

Yeah, but I have a jersey. I have a Queensland jersey. Nick Cody almost got in a fight with somebody. They're like, wrong jersey, man. He goes, it's not wrong if you want to win. He just went right at him. And that's what he rules. He was like, I'm getting yelled at.

I'm getting called an F-bomb. I just ran on people with kids. Call me K. Those guys all play American football. So we're talking about sports the whole time. Cowboy fans, same as me. And then the one guy's a Yankee fan. Same as me, quality, class, style.

And then they all clean the tables with their shirts off after the show. Dude, those guys rule, the whole club rules. They told the guy once, we gotta wrap this up, they told the guy once, he got too drunk. It was my first or second time there. And every time they bring me offers now, like oh no, we'll do a theater there.

I'm like guys, appreciate the offer, I'm going by the Comics Lounge. It's big enough, the guys rule, I have no interest in going anywhere else. If I could play in an arena, I'll still add a show at the Comics Lounge. But, and I can, I never will. But like, so they had a guy who got too drunk

before I went on, and they had to like get him out. It's whatever, it's a comedy club, it's no big deal. You got too drunk, I think he threw up. And so like they excused him, they quickly cleaned it, and they're like, you can't, you can't, you come back tomorrow, but you can't be here. And then they go, they just told him, he's like, I'm sorry, he goes,

well, Ari's not going on now. And he's like, what? No, they're like, yeah, Ari found out somebody threw up, and he's not going on now because of you. And then he's like, no, I'm so sorry. They're like, yeah, man, well, you fucked up. You kind of ruined the show for all these people. He's back there, he's saying he's leaving so we got to drive him home

So you got to get the fuck out now. I was like crying Those guys rules so hard and they were telling me and there's not even an ounce of me is like Oh, you shouldn't have done that. Yeah, it's like a hundred percent. What a great move and then at the end they drink It's like 100%, what a great move. And then at the end they drink wine with Gatorade. Do you see when they mix that? They just line up like nine glasses of some kind of wine and then they put Gatorade in it. Because I don't know if they're all football players

they want to get hydrated. Was there any Eastern European guy there who made you do shots? No, there's a guy from Alabama. Canadian guy. Black hair. Not crazy short, somebody. Well the guy with the fake hair

is the one that took me to Brett. Brett, Brett likes to. Brett's wild. Brett's a nut. Yeah, he was fun. And then who else? Yeah, but the rest of, I mean they filmed that movie Ricky Stinnicky there

at the club. So like John Cena was like, filming there. So that's why Santino went back because he was there for that. Yeah, yeah. No, I liked this club, let's go. Norman did a theater and then rushed across town

to finish up just their local showcase show. Yeah, I mean for me, Comic-Song ruled. Did you do, so there was a thing called The Spleen, which was like their hip, like Monday show. And then Arj was there. So then he's like-

I should've, I was just too jet lagged. Every night I was like passing out by eight o'clock. It was really bad, that's pretty good. So Arj is like, I do the showcase on Tuesday, you should just come down there. And I hadn't even talked to those guys. You saw him again this time? What's that?

You saw Arj again? Oh yeah, yeah. So I saw him, so we did Monday, Tuesday together, and then I headlined Wednesday through Saturday. Then did the basement club before that, because you know you don't get on until like 9.30 or something. So, but then Saturday I got on earlier, and it was killer.

Like I could have gone for an hour and a half. It was great. God, they were. They're such a good audience. And you see these dudes, like it was like. Like I could have gone for an hour and a half. It was great. They're such a good audience. And you see these dudes, like it was like four or five dudes and they're all drinking wine. Instead of drinking shots or beers or whatever, it's like just red wine is like a normal. So they have like two or three bottles

for like 25 year old like fratty kids. Cause they're so into Pinot there. Well, I did a thing about stubby holders. Cause you know like how, what koozies are? Yeah. So that's their stubby holder. And I was like, a stubby holder sounds like it's a condom for like a chode, which is like a dick that's wider than it is long.

All right, we got to wrap this up. We're not even talking about Switzerland anymore. Buddy, thank you so much. No, thanks for having me, buddy. It's good to see you. I mean, not just for this fucking podcast, but thank you for fucking changing my fucking course of my life.

Hey, you too, man. It's, I think we both benefited from this, and like, it's always good to have guys that like, you know, there's a lot of jealousy and comedy, there's a lot of weird stuff like that, but I was always happy when you got all the stuff that you do, you know, and so I appreciate that you were like always supportive of me and like helpful and stuff,

you know? Yeah, the guys you start with, there's just like different camaraderie. I didn't start with you, but I knew you before for sure. Yeah, we talk about that, like what's better, older friends or newer friends? And sometimes the newer ones appreciate you more. So we kind of met halfway through,

so we're both kind of already doing it. So I don't have the same baggage you have with all those comedy store guys. Yeah, you're getting into a fucking, like you're still competitive about the coffee shop you didn't get booked at. Or this guy used to get up on Mondays when I did. Yeah, exactly, exactly.

Yeah. I'm better than him. Yeah, I know, he works, he sells cars now. I Mondays when I did. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. I'm better than him. It's like, yeah, I know. He works. He sells cars now. I'm like, I'm still a hater. Yeah. All right.

Well, man. Thanks again. Yeah, thank you. Well, everybody, that is the episode. Thank you very much for tuning in. Yeah. Like I said in the bumper and the dates before, like, this is why I started traveling.

That deal we made, I don't think of a more influential discussion I had than me and Paul over raclette saying, Hey, what are we doing? Ari? And you got to remember this isn't like, I'm doing great now. I wasn't doing great then I was doing good, but like, I remember sending a, like a letter, a postcard to, uh, by the way, if you want to send postcards to me from your travels, I would love to have them.

151 First Avenue, number 49, New York, New York, 1003, send them to UBTripin, anywhere from around the world. Send your postcards, I read it on the Patreon when I do it, which is less than I should. Yeah, we're like, let's go, this thing is bringing us places. We should like, we should like go see the world.

Oh, so I sent a postcard, I was in Iceland. My first gig in Iceland. And I'm like, so different comics relate to different like parts of, I'm telling you, insider baseball, different parts of the comedy world. Like, a lot of guys just wanted to be stars forever. And they, Hinchcliffe is a good example of that. Burt is a good example of that.

They like wanna be part of the party. And that's who they relate to. I'm a door guy and I'm just always gonna be a door guy. That was the most influential time in my comedy and like that's just who I am. But I sent a letter, I sent a postcard to the door, to the, actually the employees of the comedy store. I remember this now.

The phone guys really, because that's where I started, working on the phones. Duncan Trussell hired me, he was on the phones. First friend in LA. And I sent a letter to them and I was like, and to the door guys too, to all of them, I was like, guys, this thing will take you to crazy places. I'm in Iceland. Like there should be no reason I'm ever there.

This is all after this, this, this trip, me and Paul did. And it's just like a wonderful thing or whatever excuse you guys can get to go traveling. I mean, like do it. If you got it, if you're working as a banker, why not work in Shanghai for a year or two? use you guys can get to go traveling. I mean, like do it. If you got it, if you're working as a banker, why not work in Shanghai for a year or two? Why not go play? Like see what affords you the ability to move and then do that. Wanton Dunn does it. He's like, I'll be the correspondent for Barstool that

there's a, but there's a thousand of those anyway. So this is what started my love of travel. Really? Um, this then we went to Amsterdam in between. I went skiing with my brother. Oh, anyway, it was a great trip. Paul told me, uh, one thing that I forgot to tell you guys that we forgot to tell you about, but first let me just tell you his dates. Go to Paul has a website.com, uh, for all of his dates in March. He's going to be the Venetian in Las Vegas. And then in May, he's going to be the Tabernacle theater in Atlanta. Um, and March he's gonna be at the Venetian in Las Vegas.

And then in May he's gonna be at the Tabernacle Theater in Atlanta. When am I there? April, no, March. May 17th, Brooke Eckhart Hall in Clearwater, SideSplitters in Wesley Chapel, Florida. Is that Tampa? And then May 30th through 31st,

Laughs Unlimited in Sacramento, California. Where he's from. Go to Paul's website.com for all those. Myself, I will be in a bunch of places. I will be in Providence next week. My main thing is I got a special coming out. America, Sweetheart, my first one in almost three years. My next one won't be for another three years.

I don't just whip these out like a, you know, well I don't wanna shit on anybody. But like, you know, those directors who put out way too many movies. That ain't me. I pour myself into this. So please tell people about it. Set your alarms, set your calendars for January 14th.

Watch it. If you gotta leave, just let it run all the way through. Let it help the algorithm. Providence this coming weekend with Adrian and I think Brendan Sagalow. Then Salt Lake City, Bre algorithm, um, Providence this coming weekend with Adrian. And I think Brendan Sagalow then Salt Lake City, Brea, Nashville, San Antonio, Tampa and Denver, and then into March, Schaumburg, Illinois, Atlanta at the Tabernacle, uh, with Adrian Appaloochee, the dark queen, Portland, Oregon. She's there too.

Second show added, uh, San Jose, Orlando, Fort Lauderdale, Seattle, Vancouver, Calgary, Edmonton, and finally wrapping up with Anchorage. And then I'm going to go do what I've been talking about on this podcast. I'm going to do some traveling. Don't worry about it. You don't have to worry about it, but it'll, it'll keep going. This podcast will keep going. Uh, give these guys some fucking some work to do while I'm gone. And, uh, you know, I'll do some from, I to do while I'm gone and uh you know I'll

do some from I'll do some more remote ones today's episode has been produced by your mom's house network he's fucking drug addicts in the other room are beautifully editing this that was That was edited actually not by any of these people, but by a nice man, Alan Caffe. Who can't? Anyway, that's it you guys. Please subscribe, tell your friends about it. My special America sweetheart coming this week. I'm super excited. Next week on the podcast, Bert the Machine Cricer, finally on here. One of the guys I've wanted on for forever. He'll be on next week. Subscribe so you can get notified of that.

Guys, go out and see the world. It's a fucking great place. There's literally no trip you can make that's the wrong trip. Even stuff that goes terribly. You're gonna look back on and go, that was a great time. Bert Cricer next week, Tucker Carlson the week after that. Maybe Jim Gaffigan after that. Oh, it's just up and up and up. If you have any suggestions for people, musicians, anybody that's been on cool trips, please suggest them in the

comments on YouTube. Subscribe on Spotify and YouTube and that's it guys. I love you all. Go out and see the world. It's amazing. Goodbye. Hasta la vista. I don't know how to say goodbye in Swiss. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. How do you say goodbye in Swiss? Hey Siri, how do you say goodbye in Swiss? I can't change that into Swiss. All right, well, fuck off. Am I right?

Abrilalouche? I love that. Some of these Germans I hear talking and I'm like, you guys are dorks.