Young and Profiting with Hala Taha - Amberly Lago: Never Give Up | E118
Episode Date: June 14, 2021Regardless of the situation, always have true grit and grace! In this episode, we are chatting with Amberly Lago, best-selling author, speaker, podcast host, and health coach. She started her speaking... career after her life was deeply altered and her world was completely changed in May 2010. While riding her motorcycle in Woodland Hills, CA, she was hit by an SUV and thrown thirty feet down a busy street. Her right leg took the brunt of the impact and was crushed almost beyond repair. Despite an incredibly difficult recovery process, being a former professional dancer, athlete, and fitness trainer, she was determined to not only save her leg, but her career, her dreams, and her dignity. After a lengthy hospital stay and 34 surgeries, doctors were able to fuse her leg together and repair her severed femoral artery despite the one percent odds of saving it and the initial recommendation to amputate. Her life experience and the proven strategies she has created to understand and maximize resilience resonate with companies whose core values include perseverance, grit, passion, and team building. And for audiences living with chronic pain (like her from CRPS) she delivers a powerful message of hope and offers solutions at conferences, workshops, and clinics. In today’s episode, we discuss Amberly’s upbringing, how she survived abuse as a child, the importance of forgiveness, and how to most past self-pity. We also dive deeper into the repercussions of her car accident, how to pace (not push) yourself through pain, and how Amberly starts her days off with reminders of gratitude. Amberly’s story is incredibly powerful and inspiring - you won’t want to miss this episode!  Sponsored by -  Policygenius. Head to policygenius.com to get started.  NordVPN. Go to nordvpn.com/yap or use a coupon YAP to get a 2-year plan plus 1 additional month with a huge discount!  Podbean. Go to podbean.com/hala to start boosting your business with podcast advertising.  Social Media:  Follow YAP on IG: www.instagram.com/youngandprofiting Reach out to Hala directly at Hala@YoungandProfiting.com Follow Hala on Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/htaha/ Follow Hala on Instagram: www.instagram.com/yapwithhala Follow Hala on ClubHouse: @halataha Check out our website to meet the team, view show notes and transcripts: www.youngandprofiting.com  Timestamps:  01:11 - How Tough Love Shaped Amberly in Her Childhood 06:08 - How Amberly Survived Sexual Abuse 15:48 - Amberly’s Take on Forgiveness 19:39 - The Way Amberly Moved Past Self-Pity 24:49 - Amberly’s Adult Life as a Single Mom and Her Accident 34:15 - How Amberly Deals with Chronic Pain and How to Sensitive 43:08 - Where Amberly Got Her ‘Grace’ From 47:51 - The Way Amberly Starts Her Day 51:40 - How to Pace Yourself Through Pain 59:05 - Amberly’s Career Evolution 1:09:52 - Amberly’s Secret to Profiting in Life  Mentioned in the Episode:  Amberly’s Website: https://amberlylago.com/ Amberly’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amberlylagomotivation/ Amberly’s Podcast, True Grit and Grace: https://amberlylago.com/podcast/ Amberly’s Book: https://amberlylago.com/book/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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You're listening to YAP,
Young and Profiting Podcast,
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I'm your host, Halla Taha,
and on Young and Profiting Podcast,
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This week on YAP, we're chatting with Amber Lago,
a health and wellness coach, best-selling author, podcast host, and TEDx speaker.
As a former professional dancer and athlete, Amber Lee Lago's life was turned upside down
at 38 when she was hit by an SUV.
The tragic accident left her in a coma and the doctors told her she would never walk again.
But Amber Lee being Amber Lee found the strength and perseverance to walk again, and she did
much more than that too.
She's now a leading expert in transformation and wellness,
and she speaks in stages all over the world to offer hope and solutions for those struggling
through life's obstacles or dealing with chronic pain. She's also the best-selling author of
TruGrit and Grace Turning Tragedy into Triumph and the host of TruGrit and Grace Podcast,
which I was lucky enough to be a guest on. In this episode, Amberly and I will discuss
her amazing healing journey
and how she overcame countless challenges that were thrown her way.
She'll share with us her Pacer method so we can turn our tragedies into triumph
and we'll also go over her morning routine and understand how she gets the grace
to go along with her grit.
Hey, Amberly, welcome to Young and Profiting Podcast.
I'm so excited to be here with you.
Thank you for having me.
I've been looking forward to this for a
while now. So this best way to start my day.
Same here. You know, I came on your
podcast. It was such a great episode that
I replayed online. You're so talented.
Thank you. I saw that.
I was like blown away and I shared it too. I know I saw. Thank you. I saw that. I was blown away and I shared it too.
I know.
I saw it.
Thank you.
It's so nice to talk to somebody who just makes you
feel warm every time you speak to them.
And that's how I feel with you.
We've had multiple interactions, a couple of meetings.
You were on a clubhouse panel that we also had on the podcast.
And you're just such an inspiration.
So I'm so excited for this conversation.
And I just can't wait to get started.
So let's bring it back to your child.
That from my understanding, you grew up in Greenville, Texas,
in a pretty small town, 20,000 people, like 50 miles
outside of Dallas.
And you are a tomboy from my understanding.
You are a tough cookie growing up.
And so I want to understand what your childhood was like and how that tough love really shaped
your character like the tough love that your family gave you and how that shaped your character.
Oh, you know, thank you.
You just took me back, girl.
It's so funny.
Yes, I was a Tom Boy.
I remember when I was about 18, I went on my first dance job.
I was booked for a job.
I grew up a dancer.
And I think my mom put me in dance because it was kind of the girly thing to do.
You know, Texas was like all about the pageants and being a southern bell.
And there I was wearing combat boots and my brother's old jeans and a white t-shirt.
And so when I went on my first
dance job at 18, I remember there was one of the girls that I was working with that she taught
me how to wear makeup. And so the first time I ever really started wearing makeup or anything
like that. And I'm grateful for the struggles that I had as a kid
because it really did develop not just the grit
that I have today, but it also really taught me
about gratitude and the value of the dollar
and how important it is to really work hard
for something that you love because, you know,
there were seven of us kids all together. Well, well, two were my stepbrother and a step
sister. So they lived with us in the summers. But there were seven of us. And my, you know,
we didn't have much money. So if we wanted something, we had to work for it. You know, I
just had a conversation with one of my daughter's friends who's a little bit older and she was upset
because her parents wouldn't let her spend the night with her boyfriend. And I'm like, well,
you need to get your driver's license. You need to get a job. I said, that's freedom. So for me,
I knew, like, I had big dreams. I knew by the time I was really probably eight years old
that I wanted to move to California
and be a professional dancer.
That's when an MTV came out and I know a lot about that.
And I saw these music videos and I thought,
wow, I could actually get paid to dance and do things
that I love.
And so I knew the only way I was gonna get to do that
was if I worked hard, saved up the money.
And so I worked for jobs.
I mean, I was a lifeguard, I babysat, I taught dance,
I worked at this little place called the cookie jar.
And I was able to save up $1,200 and packed up
my little Suzuki samurai. That was the car that I'd
saved up money to buy while I was making payments on it. And I think it was not only this deep
passion that I had for dance and I really wanted to go after my dreams, but I also didn't have a safe place growing up when my mom remarried.
I was sexually abused by my stepfather.
And so I knew I had to get out of there.
And so I think I was fueled by my passion.
I had learned grit from my brother beating the crap out of me growing up.
I mean, he blesses heart were friends now,
but that was tough, but it taught me how to defend myself.
And it's one of the things that got me into
Croft McGaw and boxing and we tie.
But I think all those things combined
really pushed me to move out here despite a lot of people
saying, you'll never
make it. What are you doing? Who do you think you are? You're just some small town
girl. You'll never make it in the big city. And I was, I had to make it because I
was not going to go back and live in that small town under the roof with someone who abused me emotionally, sexually, physically.
And so I think sometimes that pain can motivate us to do things that are sometimes scary, but it's
like, which is more scary, being in that situation or going after my dreams. And so I chose to go after my dreams.
And here I am in California. Gosh, 30 years later, I'm still here. I love it here.
Wow. Oh my gosh. There's so many ways we can take this. I want to stick on the
sexual abuse with your stepfather because that must have been so hard to be living under the roof of somebody
who was abusing you.
And from my understanding, like you didn't tell your mom for a while, you didn't really
tell anyone for a while.
So what was going through your head and try to take yourself back there.
And I know that's probably going to be difficult.
So share as much as you feel comfortable.
Try to take us back there and then give your advice in terms of like,
what would you tell a young woman going through the same thing right now? And how would you tell her
to deal with it? Well, you know, there's a lot of shame. There's a lot of fear that just goes along
with the sexual abuse. And for a long time, I couldn't talk about it. And it actually,
I thought that I had dealt with that trauma. And it wasn't until I started writing my book
that I realized, oh my gosh, things that I thought that I had really emotionally processed, I realized I was just running from my whole life. Like I ran, really ran physically ran.
I became like a track star set a record in Texas,
but I also ran, I ran to California.
And it wasn't until I started really doing
some of the emotional healing work with therapist,
with writing, meditation, prayer that I started to heal, but during that time,
it's really confusing as a kid,
because, and I look at my daughters now,
and when my oldest daughter turned eight,
and then when my youngest daughter turned eight years old,
I didn't realize things were coming up,
and I suddenly became this big mom of air and it's because
that's how old I was when the abuse started to happen and I was confused because
I trusted my stepdad and when someone tells you that this is okay and this is
how dads teach their daughters, but you know in your
gut that it doesn't feel right and when you speak out on it and they say you're wrong,
it really there's this disconnect it teaches you not to trust your gut.
And so it's been a long process of really learning to trust my gut and the thing is, you
know, our heads might tell something or heart might tell something,
but our guts never lie.
We know that feeling when something's right or wrong.
And I was scared because I was so young and he said, I will kill your mom if you tell
anyone.
And I believed him.
So for a long time, I didn't tell anyone,
and I just never felt safe.
And I finally got the courage to tell my dad.
And that was your real father, my real dad.
And that took so much courage because like I said,
you feel like it's your fault, like you're damaged.
I felt broken, I felt so much shame,
and but I was so scared and I didn't want it to continue. I went to my dad and I told him,
and I said, Dad, you can't tell anybody. Promise me you won't tell anybody, but because he said,
he'll hurt mom, he'll kill her, but but my dad never told anyone and he never did anything.
And that was so hard because I felt,
not only did I feel okay, at first, I'm not protected,
I'm not safe, I felt unworthy, like,
well, I'm not even worthy enough for protection,
I'm not even worthy enough for someone to stand up for me.
And that's all I really wanted was for him to go in and save me.
But you know what, it taught me, it taught me that we
have to save ourselves, that we have to stick up for ourselves.
And it taught me, well, I'm going to have to really take care
of myself.
And so it wasn't long after that
that I remember it was the last time
my stepfather ever laid a hand on me.
And I was in my room and he came in my room.
And I, he grabbed me by the head and pulled me back.
And this is probably a lot to share,
but pulled my head back, pulled my hair back on the bed.
And I kicked him.
Ooh, didn't mean to get emotional.
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm really.
Wow, you know what?
I fought him off.
And that was the last day he ever laid a hand on me again.
And I think that goes along with like, and I'm not saying you should always use
you know kicking and screaming, but sometimes I think maybe have to. But he never laid a
hand on me after that. And there was a lot of emotional, you know, I remember he would
he would look at me and say, my mom would be doing the dishes and he would mouth to me. You know, I remember he would he would he would look at me and say, my
mom would be doing the dishes and he would mouth to me. You just wait till your
mother leaves. So I never felt safe and safety. I think we all just want to feel
safe. We want to feel loved. We want to feel seen and heard. And so my default became to do something
that made me feel good.
Thank goodness.
I think it's so important for kids,
nowadays, especially, to have something,
to have an outlet.
And for me, I'm so grateful.
I had the outlet of athleticism.
I turned to dance.
I became a straight-A student and a bit of an overachiever.
I mean, I was our member.
When I graduated from high school, the principal called my mom and said, you know, your daughter
has won every category. She's been chosen for class favorite,
most likely to succeed, most school spirit, miss Greenville High School. She can only choose
two, so let her choose two of the two things that she wants to be nominated for. And so I think it shows that, you know, even though things may happen that
are just horrible and heartbreaking and hard, that we have a choice to do something that
brings us joy despite our circumstances, that we don't have to, even though that brought
a lot of shame for me, we don't have to live in shame.
We can walk with our head held high
and we can't overcome things.
And just because some bad things happen,
doesn't mean that we're broken.
It means that we can heal and we can be resilient
and we can get through those things.
And I would say to anyone that is going through
something like that, there's so much more nowadays, but thanks to social media, where people are
talking about it. It's not such this big dark secret. And I would say reach out for help. And if
the first person doesn't help you, then they're just not capable of helping.
And you know, my dad did the best that he could.
And it wasn't until actually I wrote my book
and I let him read the manuscript
and I didn't wanna hurt anybody
when I shared this part in the book,
but it ended up being the most healing thing
that came out of my book was,
I healed my relationship with
my dad and we were able to talk about those moments and you know he had a really rough childhood
and I was able to kind of break that cycle of abuse and trauma by speaking up and having
a voice and now I talk to my daughters about that. So they know that no, it's never okay for anyone to touch you in an appropriate way or
say inappropriate things.
And I teach my daughters it's okay to cry because for the longest time, I didn't cry.
I mean, so I'm grateful for these tears because I think from the age maybe 10 to I think I was 25
I never cried.
And it wasn't until one day I was at the airport and I'd missed my flight and my oldest daughter
I dropped my bags and started crying and she said, Mommy, I didn't know you knew how
to cry.
And it was because my stepfather would look at me
when I cried and he'd say, see, I got you.
I knew I had the best of you.
I knew I could make you cry.
So now when my daughters start to cry, I'm like, yeah, you cry.
Let it all out.
Those are healing tears.
Let it out.
You know, there's a time to get gritty.
And, you know, suck it up., served me well for a long time, but
there's also a time to really let those feelings come up so you can process them and feel them.
So I would say to anybody going through any sort of situation like that, reach out, reach
out for help. There's so much support now thanks to social media.
Oh my gosh, and really thank you so much for sharing that. I know that that was difficult,
but I think you probably helped a lot of people and inspired a lot of people with that story.
So let's talk about forgiveness. Like, did you forgive your stepfather? Did you forgive
your mother for kind of not allowing it to happen, but not being aware enough, I guess,
to know it was happening.
And how did you deal with that?
You know, forgiveness is, it sets us free. It's the gift that we give to ourselves actually.
And for me, I never, and I've had therapists say, well, you must be upset with your mom. And honestly, my mom is such an incredible mom.
She worked so hard.
She had kids she put food on the table.
She most of the time had two jobs at one time.
And it's hard to see everything that's going on.
And with five kids, with two step kids that she had,
I can only imagine, you know?
And so I've never held any sort of resentment
or anything for her.
I hold such gratitude for her.
In fact, when I had my own kids,
I didn't know that I could have more gratitude for her,
but she had a lot of guilt about it.
And so I said, Mom, I've healed from that.
I've done, and I know someone has said,
you know, when you cry, it means you haven't healed.
And I'm like, I don't know if I believe that.
I think that I don't know if you can ever
completely 100% heal something like that. I think it's always
things that will come up and you realize, oh, that's a layer that I need to work through or an
emotion I need to work through. And so my mom and I have a really great relationship where we can talk
and but she did when I let her read the manuscript before the book was sent to the publisher,
she said, well, can you, I wanted her to have an opportunity to have her say in the book.
She said, well, can you write in there? If I could have done this, I would have done this.
If I knew about the abuse and I said, but mom, this isn't a book about
could of what it should have. It's a book about this is what happened and this is what I have done
because of it. And so in other words, certain,
you know, things don't always go as planned. But, you know, these are the cards I've been
dealt and I'm going to choose to play that hell out of these cards. And so I think it
was really healing for her as well. Forgiveness with my dad, I didn't realize that I did need
to forgive him for that time when I was a little girl
and I just wanted to be rescued and saved, but I have, like I said, been able to really have
meaningful deep conversations. And I think that that's part of being resilient and moving forward
is when you can have those meaningful
conversations that really matter that are hard. They're not so easy, but when you can have those conversations that count.
So it's been a difficult process, but a very
rewarding journey because I have the kind of relationship now with my dad that I've always wanted to have.
I'm really happy to hear that.
I know that it probably helped you, which we'll get into a bit later on when you faced
a lot of different setbacks with your health and everything like that.
I'm sure going through really traumatic experiences like that and coming out the other side
kind of taught you how to overcome setbacks, even if you didn't realize it then, even
if you didn't realize that you had built that kind of strengths you how to overcome that. Even if you didn't realize it then, even if you didn't realize that you had built
that kind of strength within you.
So let's talk about self-pity, because a lot of people
have things happen to them, and they are stuck in this
self-pity, and they just feel sorry for themselves.
And, you know, what was me?
How did you decide that you were gonna be stronger than that
and focus on the present, the future,
and not your past and just feel sorry for yourself?
Well, you know what, I think we've all been there, right?
We've all had days for like, oh man, this sucks, woes man.
Why me?
Like, whether we've lost a job or, you know, our husband cheered on us me, you know, why me? Like, I, whether we've lost a job or, you know,
our husband cheered on us or, you know,
my husband didn't, my first husband did.
Just wanted to make that clear.
But I remember sitting in the hospital bed
and I was, I mean, I was having that pity party.
I was like, oh my gosh, it was the moment
when I was watching an infomercial
about how to get a Brazilian butt.
And I remember watching that commercial,
and I was a fitness trainer.
I was sponsored by Nike.
I was nationally recognized as a fitness coach
doing infomercials.
The day before I had a horrific accident,
I was doing a fitness video.
I was on the labels of vitamins.
So if you walked into like CVS or Rite Aid,
you'd see my picture with my daughter
for this vitamin company called Hot Mommies.
And so I was sitting there going,
oh my gosh, there and down at my leg, which was held together
with these metal rods and completely exposed.
I could see the inside of my leg.
I had tubes coming out both arms and a pick line that went straight into my heart.
And I started thinking, wow, me, oh my gosh, I I'm never gonna have a Brazilian, but what if I
never wear a bathing suit again? And it became this roller coaster of emotions of what if,
and what if my husband never loves me, what if I never walk again, what if today's the day they're
going to amputate my leg? And I was like, whoa, I am crashing hard, and then I realize, you know, we have a choice.
We can keep going down that road.
And it's okay to have those feelings
and have that pity party.
We just can't stay there.
Or it will change the rest of our life,
the whole course of our life.
And so I thought, instead of why me, what's next?
Well, what can I do? So that's when I grabbed this little note pad
that I still have and I started writing down
everybody that had come into the hospital
to see me, to give me gifts and food and flowers,
every nurse that was taking care of me.
So I wouldn't forget their name when they walked in
to take blood or whatever.
And I noticed how it really started changing the way I felt.
Instead of looking down at my leg and feeling sorry for myself,
I started thinking about how blessed I was for still being alive.
And you know, this morning, I think one of the reasons I'm so emotional is today is actually the
day that 11 years ago I was hit by the SUV.
And so today, I kind of take this day and celebrate life that I've been given a second chance.
And I think that every day is a day for all of us to choose to celebrate life and
the quickest and easiest way to get out of that
victim mentality is to think about how grateful you are and there's always something to be grateful for.
But I think we can have that victim mentality and say why me or we can have the mentality of a victor and say, what's next?
Why not me? Maybe I can heal and show others how they can walk through those difficult times too.
And so gratitude is something I practice every morning. And this morning I also write to my sponsor.
I've been sober for five years. This journey took me down a dark path where I also write to my sponsor. I've been sober for five years.
This journey took me down a dark path
where I started trying to drink for pain
and I actually wrote to my sponsor this morning,
gratitude and on top of that gratitude list was you
that I got to be with you on your podcast
because it's such an honor
because you're somebody I really look up to, especially
with all that you've done with your life and your hard times. And so I'm just grateful to be here
with you. Oh, Amberly, I'm so grateful for you. This is just like a love fest. Wow, I'm so
honored that you know, you're spending such a powerful day for you
with us on the podcast and I don't want to like bulldoze over this really important story and
Turning point in your life when you got into this terrible accident like I was meaning to actually tell that story to our listeners
Because I think it's so powerful. So you went to California
Your career blew up. You're a dancer, you're an MC Hammer music video.
That was your big break, right? You said you were sponsored by Nike or on the faith, you were like
on vitamins and vitamins and like people would see you in stores, you know, you became recognized
as somebody really dominating in your field of fitness and dance. And you did it on your own,
like you told us you basically ran away from home 18. And you did it on your own, like you told us,
you basically ran away from home 18 years old
and did it on your own, which is just so amazing.
And then everything was just like a,
it sounds like you just had a wonderful life
from 18 to 38, you know, or.
Yeah, well, I was a single mom for a long time.
And I-
Tell us about, tell us that period 18 was a single mom for a long time. Tell us about...
Tell us that period, 18 to 38, and then what happened that day?
Well, you know, I think that I had worked hard to build my career as a dancer and then
that transitioned into fitness.
In between then, I met my ex-husband who my family was not very approving of.
Sorry, Savannah, my daughter, if you listen to this, but you know her dad, I'm
grateful for because he gave me my beautiful daughter. But he had hair down to his
butt. He was a rocker. I didn't know at the time. He was, had a little bit of
some addiction problems, but he was a bad boy
and I had never had a bunch of, I never dated or had a lot of boyfriends. Like I said, I was a tomboy and I didn't even develop.
You know, grow and fill out a little bit until after high school actually.
And so I met him and he swept me off my feet. That was very short-lived.
I got pregnant three months after meeting him
and I got married when I was eight months pregnant.
And I was really a disgrace to my family
because I grew up in the Bible belt
and I was living and sin.
And so I decided at eight months to marry him to make it right.
Even though I knew again
in my gut that this is not going to work out, but I was pregnant and I was trying to do
the right thing.
And so I think I married him because I wanted the approval of my family.
And that was the right thing to do.
Well, we were divorced by the time she was a year old.
He was cheating on me.
His, I won't throw him under the bus completely,
but it wasn't good.
And so I was a single mom for years,
and my oldest daughter used to go to work with me,
and she would hide under the little office cubicle
and the cubicle under the desk while I would train clients.
She learned how to be a lady and sit and have manners
because I had very high-end clients and Beverly Hills
that were very well to do.
And I was always invited to their galas and their parties
and their, you know, their tea parties
and they would always invite me.
I was there, what they called me was their aerobics girl. And so I would be invited and my daughter
went everywhere with me. So she went with me and she learned how to sit and put an app in her lap
and engage with them and have conversation. And she also learned the hard work pays off
because I was able to buy my first house again
after having lost everything, my ex-husband took everything.
He took the house, he took my savings,
he ran up my credit card bills, it was terrible.
He destroyed my credit.
And so I rebuilt everything and rebuilt this business.
It had several trainers that worked for me. It was a big business. So she saw that how hard I
worked through those moments. And I have to just say, I'm so proud of her because she just got
accepted to Yale. So she's going to be going to Yale. She wants to be a doctor. And I think
that seeing me go through so many surgeries, I asked her, I'm like, what made you want to become
a doctor? And she's like, mom, you did. Seeing you go through 34 surgeries is, and so she, I'm so proud of her. And so when I, life was good when, right before I had my accident, I finally met the man
of my dreams.
I thought I was going to be a single mom forever.
I was good with that.
But we were told that we weren't able to have children together.
Miraculously, we conceived.
I have Ruby who is like my little mini me. She's a little athlete
and a tomboy and I mean she's so much fun and life was really good and my career
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to walk again when I was told I'd be wheelchair bound, to love again when I
thought, oh my gosh, is my husband going to stick with me through all of this.
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I'm sure it's hard work and you must be so proud and I'm sure your daughter looks
up to you so much and just, you know,
learned so much from you. And honestly,
I feel emotional in this interview
because I just feel like God has chosen you.
Like, I feel like you've been through so much pain
and like unnecessary pain,
like compared to most people in the world,
like the things that you've dealt with,
we didn't really get into it,
but guys, she got into it,
a very terrible motorcycle accident
where an SUV hit her and
they told her that she would have to amputate her leg and she went to 34 surgeries and still
has a leg that looks different than everybody else's leg.
But what?
She can walk, she can run, she can bike, and she focuses on the things that she can do.
And like I said, I really think that you were chosen for getting other people out of their circumstances.
Like now you're bringing so much good into the world
even though you've been through the ringer, you know,
and it's just, you're so strong.
And I just wanna say that you're just so strong
and you're just so resilient.
And this is your purpose, like turning your pain
into your purpose, that's what a lot of people
come on my show say and that's exactly what you've done.
Thank you. Well, I think it can make a pain can be, it has been a really big teacher for me because I used to
grit growing up in Texas and being an athlete and a dancer and and I learned a lot about grit, but I think it's also
taught me about grace, about giving yourself grace,
about listening to your body and understanding what you need, and also about kindness and being kind to others and having compassion.
And especially now with what's going on in the world, you know, I was just at a drive-bar the other day, I don't know if you ever go there.
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Okay, so I want to talk about your chronic pain.
So for my understanding, you, your doctors basically told you when you first
got into that accident that they wanted to amputate your leg, but you and your
husband were firm and said, no, you know, we're going to work through this.
You found a doctor who would, you know, perform surgeries for use that you
could keep your leg, but unfortunately,
it's lefty with chronic pain, right? And I think it's called like the suicide disease or something
along those lines. So tell us about chronic pain, how you deal with it, and maybe help us understand
how many people deal with chronic pain, and maybe like how we as people who don't deal with chronic
pain, how it could be more sensitive
and like aware of the people that are suffering with that. Thank you for asking about that. Yeah,
well, I just thought, especially being an athlete and being injured before and being a dancer,
you get injured, you just work hard, you rest, and you get better. And I couldn't understand why my pain seemed to be getting worse.
My leg was a different color.
It looked, besides being deformed and scarred,
it just looked different.
And I remember someone, a friend of mine came over
and he said, why is one leg a different color
than the other one?
And I'm like, I don't know, it's healing, I don't know.
And then I went to one of my doctors
and I thought he's gonna be so proud of me
because I'm standing upright on crutches
and they told me it would take me two years to be upright
because my leg was just so crushed into pieces.
And I went in to see him and he ran out of the office
and I remember looking at my husband and
going, well, that's not the reaction I was hoping for when he comes back in and he said,
you've got something very serious.
And I said, well, yeah, I know I've got something very serious.
I was hit by an SUV said, no, you've got complex regional pain syndrome.
Your life is never going to be the same.
You're going to be permanently disabled.
You need to go back home and get in your wheelchair. And I was like, well, how long do I need to stay
in my wheelchair? He said, forever. And I was crushed. I thought, this cannot be the rest of my life.
And so I did probably the worst thing that I could do was I went home and I googled what complex regional pain syndrome was.
And it's like, oh, it's the suicide disease. There's no, no, sure. The pain is ranked highest on
the pain scale. And you will, your life will never be to say, it was horrible. And all the pictures
that came up. And so that really led me to a place of denial. I was like, that's not me. I did not want to look at it.
And I think that no matter what we're going through, unless we really take a look at it and we get
take radical acceptance for where we are, that's when we can really start to take action steps to
feel better. And so there, it's the numbers, not for CRPS, but people with chronic pain, the numbers are crazy.
There's like three out of five people are, I think, three out of five that live with
chronic pain.
And the chronic pain is when something that is, you know, last for a long period of time,
for me, it is sometimes feels like there's a by script around my foot. It's a disease of a sympathetic nervous system. So it's
where your your nervous system is all out of whack and there's a constant
loop of pain. So I mean, I've tried everything from a spinal stimulator, ketamine
infusions, Eastern Western medicine. I was on 73 homeopathic pills, like
literally handfuls of pills a day, 11 different prescription
medications, and nothing was helping with the pain, and nothing helps except really the
thing that has the most impact made the biggest difference was resilience.
And that's something that we all have.
And so I had to figure out ways to be more resilient.
And that is really not a pill. It's not one thing I do. It's mind-body spirit. And it's a mind-body spirit transformation.
And so for me, it's really about, it starts with mindset. And until you can get your mindset right, that's when you can start to say like you were
saying earlier about the, you know, why me?
When you can get out of that and say, okay, what's next?
When you can start to switch the soundtracks in your head, the sound track of saying, oh,
I'll, you know, I'll never work again.
I'll never be cured.
I'll never, you know, I'm deformed and you
can switch that to something a positive affirmation.
Even if you don't believe it right away, you start to believe it, if you repeat it and
it's powerful, if you say it out loud.
So I think it's really important to look at what you're telling yourself because we can
be our own worst enemy or we can be our biggest cheerleader.
And then I think it's so important to surround yourself
with people who are positive, and I say this,
because when I first got diagnosed,
I had doctors tell me, well, you need to get in the support group.
You need therapy.
You need to get on this antidepressant.
Antidepressants did not work for me.
I tried several different ones,
and I know they worked great for some people, but for me, I threw them up. I tried several different ones, and I know they worked great for some people,
but for me, I threw them up.
I was sick every day, and I thought,
I think I'll just, I know if I can move my body,
it'll move my mind, and I'll feel better,
because moving your body releases endorphins
that combat pain.
When you're in pain, sometimes you're scared to move.
You don't want the pain to get worse.
There's a, you have to see how much you can move
before you know, cause more pain.
And then you also have to think about how you can rest.
So you can recover.
But moving your body is essential.
And it not just releases endorphins,
it makes you more confidence, it makes you feel capable.
So for example, when I was in the hospital, I couldn't even use the bathroom on my own.
I had to use, and that's a humbling experience when you have to use the bed pan,
but I knew if I could just
try to do things to make me feel stronger mentally, physically, and spiritually, I would be better.
So I asked the doctors if they could install a pull-up barb
over the bed.
I had one of my friends from the gym
bring me some dumbbells.
And so I was doing curls from my upper body.
I was lifting myself up,
but for my bed pan, which the nurses loved.
By the way, they're like, oh, good,
she can take care of herself.
But I did everything I could to make me feel
like I was moving in the right direction.
And so if you're in pain, it's so important to start where you are, use what you have
and do what you can.
Even if that's a little bit, and that's a lot about what I share, like even on, you know,
my social media, is things that you can do to start switching your mindset, to start
feeling better physically.
And so it's, I changed my eating and it changed my life.
I cut out alcohol.
I started drinking every day when no medications or anything was working.
I was like, well, this wine kind of numbs the pain.
Kind of helps me stuff down these feelings a little bit,
and I have the family history of addiction, and I knew, oh my gosh, how did I start drinking
every day? How did this happen? And so I knew I needed help from that. That was like a vicious cycle.
So it's so important to ask yourself, how's working, how's that working for you?
Is that helping you or is it hurting you?
Is it moving you closer to your goals or further away?
Is it causing more pain?
Or is it causing you to be more resilient, more power, more empowered?
And so I think it's a process of so many things, of shifting your perspective, of being an acceptance,
of having a community of people around you, of getting gritty and tapping into your purpose,
having a purpose, and then also resting and really recovering.
That's so important.
Getting enough sleep.
Because I used to just hustle, hustle, hustle, hustle.
And it's like, we need to have downtime so we can not just rest our bodies, but also spark creativity.
Oh my gosh, she just gave so many awesome gems. I love how you talked about moving your body,
because that's also what you did when you were younger to get out of your pain. You know,
you focus on dance, you focus on fitness and running
and everything like that to kind of just get over your pain.
And so that's definitely something
that I feel like you probably learned
from your younger years.
So your podcast, your book, it's called True, Grit, and Grace.
I think that it's very clear where you got your grit from.
But I'd love to hear the grace piece.
Like where does grace fit into all of this?
And how can we be graceful when we're trying
to overcome our adversities?
Oh, thank you for asking.
And the grace part is something I think I learned the hard way.
I mean, I always grew up going to church
and I had a God in my life, but I really cut God out and I was all in my ego,
which ego stands for, I think, edging God out.
And so I'd kind of lost that connection to my higher power and especially when I started drinking for pain. And that just really, you disconnect you from,
and whether you believe in God, for me it's God,
or whether you believe in universe, or higher power,
my good friend Shannon always says,
Gus, let Gus drive the bus.
So God, universe, spirit.
So always remind myself, get out of myself,
get out of my ego, get out of my own way,
and let go and let God. And I think when we know we're not alone on our journey,
that's what allows me to have faith and what lies ahead. But the grace part for me was when I was
at my lowest point, and I was really thinking, you know, my daughters could find another mom, my husband could
find another wife that I feel like by the grace of God there was that spark, that light, that little
glimmer of hope that was left in me that took a lot of courage to ask for help. And so by the grace of God, I did ask for help.
And I think that changed my life.
I think that you never know how when somebody asked for help
that it could be that saving moment for them.
And so I learned that God was there all the time
just for me.
I just needed to let God in.
And so grace is for me that God has lifted the obsession of drinking, that God has watched
at me.
I have guardian angels.
I swear they work overtime because it's been a journey.
I was hit by my daughter and I were hit by a car just in December and just this
week it's taken this long months that my daughter finally said, Mom, you know, those little razors,
the little scooters, let's go for a scooter ride. So it takes time to heal and I'm like, God was
watching over me and my daughter then. God is always watching over.
And so grace, the grace is the grace
that would give ourselves to because I can be so hard
on myself, my gosh, I can just beat myself up
and tell myself I'm not good enough
or who am I to go do that TED Talk
or who am I to be on your incredible podcast.
You have like, you're the person I look to for what
you're doing next for podcasting because your podcast is like number one. And so I could sit there
and go, who am I to be on her podcast? But it's like the grace that we give ourselves that, no,
you know, think about the hardest thing you've, when I'm feeling like that, I think about the hardest thing I've ever overcome.
And I think, oh my gosh, if I can get through 34 surgeries,
I can go stand on that stage, or I can go talk in that clubhouse room,
or I can, you know, go on the podcast, or whatever it is that you're scared of,
it's like, think about the hardest thing you've ever overcome.
And for me, I really make it a practice to connect to God every day.
So I start my day with a prayer and it's not fancy.
It's not pretty.
A lot of times I just talk to God and some people might.
I feel the most connected in nature, not necessarily in church.
But so that's really the grace that I think that came into my life,
the grace that I give myself, that I think it's so important during these times that we all give
ourselves a lot of grace because we've all had to change and be flexible. And some of us have had
to completely pivot all together. So that's where the grace comes in.
I love that. And then for my understanding,
you start your morning with a prayer to kind of get you into the right mindset.
Could you share that with us like how you start your day to get you in the right mindset?
Yeah, I think that if I don't start my day with a grounding myself, oh my gosh, I am all over the place.
And so when, you know, I want to grab my phone, first thing, I want to check Instagram, I want
to check emails, I want to see what's going on.
But if I do, if you do that, you're pulled in a million different directions.
It's like you, you know, you don't have to say so in your schedule, but when you start
your day with your intentions and whatever morning routine works for you, I know, you don't have to say so in your schedule, but when you start your day with your intentions
and whatever morning routine works for you,
I think that you have to figure out what works for you
and stick to that and do what feels good.
Because if it doesn't feel good,
if it doesn't bring you joy,
then you're probably not gonna stick to it.
And so for me, what makes me feel better
is if I start my day with a quick, it's a
quick prayer, sometimes a long prayer before my feet hit the floor. Also a prayer throughout
the day. And actually, I have this on my desk. It's the serenity prayer. And I love this
because it doesn't have to be, it's not about religious, it's about spirituality. And for me, it's, you know, grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
And so I say that prayer whenever I'm struggling, but I also said, you know, like I have a gratitude
list and I write down what I'm grateful for, I write down what my intentions are for the day.
So anything I do, whether it's writing a post or making a phone call or what coaching
a client or being on a podcast or doing one of my podcasts, I always think about what
my intentions are.
And that is to bring hope and inspiration, to add value, and to
bring some love into. And then I think, you know, it's important to have
accountability for me that helps keep me on track. So every morning I read
something out of usually a daily reflections book or some sort of a
spiritual book, and I screenshot it, and I take a picture of that and I send it to my sponsor
and she sends me something back.
So it helps when you think you're too busy
and you can't do the, they're like,
no, I'm gonna be accountable to this person
and I'm gonna do it.
So I think it's real important to have somebody
whether it's a friend, a best friend, a coach, a mentor,
being a mastermind, hold yourself accountable
and also so you know you're not alone.
I think for me, a mastermind and masterminding
is what changed a lot for me, not just with my mindset,
but with my business.
So you don't have to do it alone.
That's what I would say.
Start your morning off getting grounded
and know you're not alone in it.
Yeah, and for me, like, this is one of the biggest takeaways
of today's session is that you got to take time to work
on your mental health and not just go to the thing that feels good,
like pausing, taking time to reflect, taking time to be grateful,
all of that.
My next question is about the difference between pushing through pain and pacing through
pain, because I know that you're really not a proponent of pushing through pain.
So I want to know why is that the wrong approach, and then how can we pace ourselves through
it instead?
You are so good.
You know, I've never been asked that question.
That's amazing. Yeah, because you know what?
I used to push through pain and that's all I knew, you know, growing up and I was told,
oh, you're throwing up, don't throw up on the track.
You know, my track coach would be like off the track to throw up and keep running.
My dance teacher would be like, I don't care if your toes are bleeding and your point
she used to show must go on. And so my whole life, I push through pain, push through so much.
And let me tell you, you can't really push through CRPS.
CRPS is the hardest thing I've ever gone through.
It's harder than the 34 surgeries because you live with it every single day and the pain
can suck the energy out of
you. It can destroy relationships. It can make you bitter if you choose. But we have a
choice and it took me a lot. It took me down a dark path and to where I was having suicidal
thoughts. I mean, it's called the suicide disease, and I quickly learned why,
because it can be torturous if we allow it.
We don't have the proper tools.
And so I had a friend of mine ask me,
well, how do you, once I started doing these things
that I do every single day to be more resilient,
I had a friend say, how do you do that?
How do you go get on a plane and go
to an event? How do you continue to coach people and work when other people can't get out of bed?
And I really thought about it and there are things that I do every day and we've talked about them,
but I'll just share them really quick. So instead of pushing through the pain, I think,
and some people get triggered and don't like the word pace, I know I didn't.
And this all came about because my husband told me,
you need to pace yourself and it pissed me off.
And I thought, I don't, it's kind of like
when somebody tells you you need to calm down.
It's like, what?
I'm not gonna calm down.
And so I started thinking, well, I do pace myself.
And pacing for me is, and that's how I came up with the word, pacer.
And it's a quick reminder for me to, whenever, not just pain, but whenever I'm feeling anxious
or I'm sad or I'm in a thunk or I'm really tired.
And I'm like, what have I not done to be more resilient?
And so you can be more resilient if you just do these five things.
So perspective, shift your perspective.
The moment you start to feel crappy or anxious or sad or scared, like the quickest and easiest
way to shift your perspective is with gratitude.
So I think about what is one thing I'm grateful for this morning. I woke up.
My leg is really stiff. I'm going to jump to the gym yesterday. And I thought, gosh,
I'm so sick of this pain. I thought, wait a minute. No, I'm grateful. I can walk because
11 years ago, I was on life support with tubes going down my throat. And a machine breathing for me said,
no, I'm grateful.
And it quickly let me tell you,
it really allows, it's alchemy.
It turns what you can't do into what you can do
and what you don't have into what you do have.
Acceptance is the next part of PASER.
Like we've talked about before,
you take radical acceptance.
That allows you to take action steps
to make your life the best that it can be.
And when you start to share what you're going through
and you get real, and it's hard to take a good,
hard look at your life sometimes,
but when you get real and you feel comfortable
to share that with people that you love or trust,
you start to build community,
and that's the next part of PASER because
community might be the most important part of PASER. I used to try to do it alone and I couldn't.
Together we're stronger. And that's something you do so well. You're always teaching people how to
promote their podcast, how to build their platform, how to do, you know, whether it's through your podcast
or through Clubhouse, I'm always amazed at how much
you share and you give and the culture and the community
that you have built.
And that takes endurance, which is the next part of Pacer.
And that is really where I think your passion and your purpose come into play.
It's, you know, we're not always going to be motivated.
And so, if we can think about, remember why we started,
that will usually light up a fire underneath us to keep us going.
And then the last part of PASER, which I wanted to leave off,
I wanted to leave the R off and just part of PASER, which I wanted to leave off, I wanted to leave the
R off and just call it PASER.
Because I'm still learning this last part.
The rest part is so hard for me because I think in my mind I used to think that resting
meant quitting and I didn't want to be a quitter.
But resting is really, if you really want to be resilient, you have to strategically
stop. You have to allow yourself to have times to recover and rejuvenate. So you can be more creative.
So that you can pause and then reflect on what you need to do. What are your next steps? It
allows you time to listen to your heart and your soul and your intuition.
I think that resting is, you know, so many people think of it as like a luxury or it's,
you know, but it's really important if we want to keep moving and we don't want to get
burnout to take times to rest.
So, you know, you can see more about in depth about the
Pacer method on my TED Talk that I did. And there's a link for it, my buy-on
stuff. But that's really what helps me. And I hope that it helps you next
anyone who's listening that get through a difficult time. Like, what are
those things? And I've had somebody, one of my friends, when I was freaking out,
because we had some buyers here the other day one of my friends, when I was freaking out,
because we had some fires here the other day,
and she asked me how I was doing.
I'm like, I'm freaking out.
We might have to evacuate the horses at the barn,
and she was like texted one word back to me.
She texted the word, Pacer,
and I was like, oh yeah, how can I...
Yeah.
I love that.
I think that it's such a great rule of thumb for us
to kind of have as a guide.
And I think that some of us might be really good
at certain parts of that method,
but then not good at others.
Like, for example, I'm just like you,
like the rest piece is something that I always skip over.
I always just try to keep going, keep going, keep going.
But it's important to rest, be mindful, be grateful,
take a break, enjoy yourself and not just
bring yourself out to your point.
So I love that.
So I also want to talk about the fact that you've transformed your career over and over
and over, a dancer, to a fitness instructor.
Now you're a speaker, your podcast host, four years ago, you didn't even know how to
use a computer.
Like, that's incredible.
How did you teach yourself all of this?
How did you overcome the imposter syndrome?
How did you evolve your career so drastically
and become an influencer
and all these different things that you are?
It's so much different from who you were 10 years ago.
So how did you do it?
Well, thank you.
Yeah, and I wasn't that long ago that I wasn't even on social media.
I mean, I started an Instagram just to really basically stalk my oldest daughter and see what
she was up to.
But, you know, I think to get over that imposter syndrome, I think, first of all, that's just
a feeling that we get when we know we're about to do something really big and
important and meaningful and so if we can kind of reframe it and that's what I
do in my mind is like okay I'm stepping out of my comfort zone and I'm about to
make some magic and I'm doing I'm I'm moving forward and so I want to say that
you're who may ever ever maybe listen list thing and you're, you're not maybe happy
with what you're doing or you want more out of life. This is your sign to go for it. It's never too late.
You're never too old, you're never too young, you're never, you know, don't, I used to think, oh,
well, I'm just not smart enough, I don't have a college education or, and I've had plenty of naysayers, and you know what, I always,
I've been an underdog for a lot of my life,
and that's to me where I get a lot of my motivation
is when somebody tells me I can't do something,
I'm like, oh yeah, really, thank you for that motivation.
Watch me.
Watch me, here I go,
and so I think that when I think about the passion I had inside me was I wanted to
give others the hope that had been given to me.
I wanted to share.
I thought if I can write a book and if I can show somebody that they can get through
the most difficult moments that they can turn a tragedy into triumph, that they can never give up, then that will give my pain purpose.
That will make meaning out of going through the hell that I went through with my motorcycle accident.
And so I focused on that and I didn't vote what my intention was.
I thought, well, I I'm gonna write a book and
everybody was like yeah right okay fitness girl you don't even own a computer and our
member I was invited to go speak at this um motivational series by Lorna Jane and I'm not
sure if you know who that is but it's a big line. And they invited me to speak at this event
for inspiring women.
And it was me and these fitness celebrities
and authors like Daniel Laporte.
And then there was me.
And the media rolled up and my picture was there.
And I remember thinking, oh my gosh,
all these people have these huge volumes. And I had like, I don't know, 300 followers on Instagram, no website,
nothing. And when I decided to write my book, I hand wrote probably 80, 90% of the
book and I remember when I had to send a picture to the event for Lauren and Jane.
I didn't even know I was using my husband's laptop and I didn't even know how to attach
a picture to an email.
And I asked him, I was like, honey, can you teach me how to do it?
He goes, oh, what do you need now?
And I was, I just cried.
I was like, I don't know how to do this.
And you're not helping me.
And I was like, that's it.
I'm gonna go buy a computer.
I'm gonna learn.
So I went to Apple Bottle App Top, took a class,
raised my hand over and over and over and asked,
like, how do you, I didn't know anything about.
I didn't know how to work it.
But when the event came up for Lorna Jane,
and I realized, oh my gosh,
if I'm serious about having a message, I got to get serious about learning how to get
my message out there.
So I learned how to use Instagram.
I used Botlet laptop.
I typed up my book.
I found a publisher.
They said, we don't do marketing.
I figured out. I'm still figuring out how
to do marketing, but I built it from the ground up and I leave my very first post on Instagram. I
leave them up there, which you see a lot of people that have hundreds of thousands of followers and
every post looks perfect. I'm like, no, go take a look at mine on Instagram.
I'll leave it there on purpose to show
that we all start somewhere.
I sucked and I still do some posts that are like,
oh, why did I post that?
That was terrible, but it's like,
it's just getting out there and starting and doing it.
And if somebody like me can write a book by hand,
learn how to use a computer, get a publisher,
my book launched on the Today Show
and became a bestseller in three different categories.
And I went on to do the doctor's TV,
hallmark, a TED talk.
Now I've shared the stage with Mel Robbins,
Jay Shetty, Brandon Bershard,
some of my favorite people, Trent Shelton.
And so if someone like me can do this, anybody, you're listening right now, if you've got
a book and you like 80% of people want to write a book, this is your sign, write a book.
Just start writing every day and focus on why it is you want to write that book and who knows where
it can connect you.
I mean, I'm so grateful that the best thing that's come out of my book are the connections
that I've made along the way.
Like, I would have never met you had I not written my book.
I'm sure, you know, I would never probably be using a laptop or computer.
Yeah.
Yeah, so do it.
Go write the book. Go after your dreams. Life is short.
And I feel like we need to live full out and decide every day that we are going to find joy in the
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Oh my gosh, this is so,
one of the most inspiring episodes I feel like
we've ever had on Younger and Profiting.
But I keep feeling like crying.
I just, because I'm so proud of you.
Like I'm so proud that you got over all these things
and you followed your dreams
and you didn't listen to the naysayers.
And I think back to my story, how 2018, I wanted to start Young and Profiting Podcasts
and everybody told me, what are you doing? You're ruining your life.
You're following an old dream. You're never going to be able to do it. You're going to ruin your career.
You're ruining your life. And thank God I just did it and didn't listen to anyone and figured it out
and learned it on my own.
There wasn't office hours on clubhouse back then.
I learned it on my own and you can learn anything on your own.
Yeah, and I think, I feel like we're a lot alike
and what we've overcome, your story's different than mine,
but our mindset and our grit is so similar
and what you have built.
And I know you had some naysayers
and you were dealt some cards that were like,
really, I worked my ass off and this is what I get,
but I think every hard situation that you've been through too
has led you, is giving you the
grit and has led you to where you are today.
And I think it also, do you feel like it makes you appreciate where you are today, even
more?
Yeah, I feel like the reason why I'm so hard working and just attack every day is because
like nothing was ever handed to me.
Like nothing was, I was never like just picked for something and was like luck. Like never. You know what I mean? Like it's like especially with my name and everything like that.
I was, it's actually been a fight to get anything good in my life. You know, only recently now
I'm being really accepted. Just like the last year. Since podcast magazine was the first time I felt like I ever got something where I was like,
wow, like I'm not sure if I was exactly ready for this.
Like, they really gave me this really nice look.
Like, that was the first time I ever actually felt like I got something not easy,
but like, wow, I was actually given this award.
Like, you know what I mean?
Or like this, this opportunity. That's the know what I mean? Or like this opportunity.
That's the first time I ever felt like
I got an opportunity.
You worked your ass off for that.
Yeah, I know.
And the work, you put in the work every day
and a lot of people that listened to your podcast,
they might not know if they don't do a podcast on their own,
just all the behind the scenes that goes
on and bring in an episode every week. And I mean, you release so many episodes, but I just,
the reason I say I really, I look to you for podcasting because you're such an inspiration
to you for podcasting because you're such an inspiration
in what you have created and what you've done. And what you're doing for so many women out there that you're given them a voice.
And I was just talking to my youngest daughter about this last night because my husband
and her kind of got in a little argument and he kind of shut her down.
I was like, uh, uh, wait a minute.
Nope, she's expressing her opinion.
And so we had a big family talk around the dinner table.
But we got in the car.
I love our car rides, my daughter and I,
because that's when we have our like really,
our deep conversations.
And I was like, you know, Ruby,
I'm really proud of you for having a voice.
And for sharing how you feel, you know, Ruby, I'm really proud of you for having a voice and for sharing how you feel.
I said, I want you to always speak up and know how powerful your voice is.
And that's what you do for so many times.
Oh, thank you.
You're really, you're incredible.
And I've just been so inspired by your clubhouse rooms.
I wanna get in on clubhouse with you again soon
and your podcast.
And so it's just such a joy to be here with you
and connect with you in your audience.
It's incredible.
Thank you so much.
Amberly, I feel the same way about you guys.
You have to go check out her podcast.
It's called True, Grit, and Grace.
Amberly, the last question that I ask all my guests,
and this is your opportunity to give a piece of advice that maybe you we haven't
covered yet. What is your secret to profiting in life?
My secret to profiting in life is really having my priorities in place and knowing what my values are because to me, profiting is not just about
money, it's about your health, it's about your relationships. And so I feel like when you know what
your values are, it helps you make decisions a little easier. And when you know what your priorities
are, it helps you put yourself on your to-do list. And when you can take care of yourself,
then you can help others. And you can take care of your family and your clients. And so
I think that just really take a moment to write down what your values are, what your priorities are,
because those slip me sometimes, because a lot of things come up, I'm like, oh, that looks fun.
Yeah, I want to do that. I want to do that. I want to do that. It's like, no, what is the plan?
How am I going to best profit for my pocketbook, for my health, for, you know, my family?
And so I think it's really important to always go back to what
you're values in your and having a table with that. I totally agree. 100% such great advice. And
where can our listeners go to learn more about you and everything that you do? Oh, thank you.
You can go to amberley.logo.com. I hang out mostly on Instagram at amberley.ilago Motivation and I've got some free downloadables
in there in my link and you can find my podcast and everything online there.
True Gritten Grace, my book is True Gritten Grace, my clubhouse room is True Gritten Grace.
And if you want to text me, if there's someone out there because I know we went deep today.
I know like if there's somebody out there and you want a text being you don't want to DM me on Instagram. You can text me
at 818-214-7378 especially if you're going through something hard and haven't shared it like
we talked about a lot of trauma. So my favorite thing is connecting with people. So I look forward to hearing
from you. And I will definitely, you know, I'm going to share this and shout it off the
rooftops that I got to be on your podcast. I'm so grateful. Thank you so much, Amberly. What a great
conversation. I think you motivated so many people. I personally feel like I'm ready to attack the
day. So thank you so much for your amazing words of wisdom. We have so much to learn from you.
Definitely go check out her podcast,
True Grit and Grace.
Her book, True Grit and Grace,
she is brilliant.
Follow her on social media.
Always a pleasure, Amberly.
Thank you.
Wow, that Amberly logo really has some grit.
She went through so much sexual abuse,
a tragic car accident,
and she came out the other side, a winner.
You just can't beat the person who won't give up.
That day when her life got turned upside down and she was hit by an SUV must have been
so tough.
I mean, at the time her face was plastered all over infomercial products.
She was working for Nike, she just married the man of her dreams, the world was at her
feet, and boom, everything changed.
It makes me feel so thankful for being healthy and whole right now.
Life can transform at any moment, no matter how successful you are.
So just make sure you value every single day like it's your last and feel grateful today.
I mean seriously, breathe, take a moment and just feel grateful for where you are right now
for the status of your health right now, because guys, as we get older, our health is only
going to get worse.
And so just really, I really want everyone to feel grateful for where they're at right
now.
They're physical, they're mental, they're financial status, just be grateful.
And the next time you do face an obstacle, remember Amberly and her story.
She was a fitness trainer, she had her purpose was to help people be fit and healthy, and
then she became dependent and disabled.
Most people would just give up at that point and just be like, okay, I'm done, throwing
in the towel, my life's over, but no.
She decided that she was going to shift her mindset, she decided she was gonna focus on what she still can do,
she believed she could walk again
despite what other people said,
and it takes willingness, determination, and grit
to go against the odds.
And she did it all with a smile on her face,
and I honestly think there's very few things in life
that can't be accomplished without a lot of hard work
and a positive attitude. So that's my biggest takeaway for today. I honestly think there's very few things in life that can't be accomplished without a lot of hard work
and a positive attitude.
So that's my biggest takeaway for today.
And if you're in the mood to keep hearing
inspiring stories, check out number 95,
tap into a miracle mindset with Tim Story.
He's an acclaimed author, speaker, and life coach
to top athletes and celebrities like Oprah.
Here's a clip from that episode.
I love young people's energy.
I'm surrounded by young people who work with me on projects,
like from 17, 18 on.
Because I love the creative energy.
But I think this is one thing that draws them to me.
We have people from all over the world
trying to come to us in LA to do an internship with us,
because they love my discipline. And the
whole idea is dreaming is easy, but to do the dream is a whole different thing. Walt Disney
walked into an amusement park in the 30s and he said, one day, I want to build my own
amusement park. Mine's going to be different, better, and more magical.
Well, the thing about Walt Disney that I love is that as I began to study him,
his work ethic was at the next level.
So he really practiced these principles of the law of the harvest that you described,
which is if you want a harvest,
if you want to create Disneyland as he did in the 60s
After we saw the vision of it
You first have to plow the ground
Then you have to plant the right seed
Then you have to water the seeds that's every single day your hustling and
Then you're gonna reap a harvest
But then the proverb says if you chase fantasies
going to reap a harvest. But then the proverb says, if you chase fantasies, then you lack wisdom.
And you're right, we have a lot of people, even my age, that are still chasing fantasies to the stay, but you got a plow, you got a plant, you got a water, and then pay days on its way.
Again, that's number 95, tap into a miracle mindset with Tim's story.
And honestly, this is one of my favorite episodes on the podcast.
It's one of my all-time favorites, and a lot of people reached out about how much they
loved that episode.
And as always, I'm going to shout out a recent Apple Podcast review.
This week's shoutout goes to Z-Mokes.
And by the way, guys, put your real name in the review because Apple Podcast user
names are so random sometimes.
For example, like Z Mox, that might be the listener's real name, but I'm not positive and
I'm almost positive that's not their real name.
So I really want to be able to properly shout you guys out.
So please leave your real name in your review.
Alright, so the review goes like this.
Favorite Podcast I discovered this year.
This is a great listen, I haven't missed a show since the Seth Godin interview.
The host Hala dives into interesting topics and doesn't ask the same question I've heard
popular guests asked hundreds of times on other interviews.
I actually discovered this on YouTube and not linked in like other reviewers, and I recommend
the video version for those on YouTube. It's really well produced and has connected me
to other interesting content on there.
Looking forward to more shows.
Thanks, Hala.
Oh wow, thank you so much, Z, for mentioning YouTube.
I just realized that I almost never mentioned YouTube
on the show.
So oops.
You guys can check out the video podcasts on YouTube.
We put them up every single week.
So if you guys want to check out me interviewing Matthew McConaughey or Seth Goatton,
like Zee was just mentioning, go check us out on YouTube.
I'd love for you guys to subscribe to us on YouTube and let me know if you did.
As we wrap up here, I want to make sure you guys subscribe to the podcast if you enjoyed the show.
And if you do enjoy the show and you listen all the time, tell your friends, put it in. One of your WhatsApp groups. Tell a family member spread the show. And if you do enjoy the show and you listen all the time, tell your friends,
put it in one of your WhatsApp groups. Tell a family member, spread the love. Tell more
people about Younger Profiting podcasts. I want to become the biggest podcaster in the world,
help me on this mission. And you can take a screenshot of this app and then tag me at Yap
with Hala. And then I'll be posted on my Instagram. It's a way that we can mutually benefit from each other. You can follow me on Instagram at Yap with Hala or LinkedIn
and Clubhouse just search for Hala Taha. And if you haven't subscribed to Young
Appropping Podcast, again, make sure you take a couple moments to do that so you be alerted
every time we drop a new episode and much love to my incredible Yap media team. I'm so proud of everyone.
I'm so thankful for everyone.
This is Hale signing off.
Are you looking for ways to be happier,
healthier, more productive, and more creative?
I'm Gretchen Ruben, the number one best-selling author
of the Happiness Project.
And every week, we share ideas and practical solutions
on the Happier with Gretchen Ruben podcast. My co-host and Happiness Guinea Pig is my sister Elizabeth Kraft.
That's me, Elizabeth Kraft, a TV writer and producer in Hollywood. Join us as we explore fresh
insights from cutting-edge science, ancient wisdom, pop culture, and our own experiences
about cultivating happiness and good habits. Every week we offer a try this at home tip
you can use to boost your happiness
without spending a lot of time energy or money.
Suggestions such as follow the one minute rule.
Choose a one word theme for the year or design your summer.
We also feature segments like know yourself better
where we discuss questions like are you an over buyer
or an under buyer, morning person or night person,
abundance lever or simplicity
lever. And every episode includes a happiness hack, a quick easy shortcut to more happiness.
Listen and follow the podcast, Happier with Gretchen Rubin.
Ugh, another pointless video call where nothing gets done. I think you're on mute, David.
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