Young and Profiting with Hala Taha - Dr. Marshall Goldsmith: Become a Better Leader | E42
Episode Date: October 18, 2019Want to develop your leadership skills? In #42, Hala speaks with Dr. Marshall Goldsmith, a pioneer in the field of business education and leadership coaching who has worked with over 150 major CEOS. ...Dr. Marshall is the only two-time winner of the Thinkers 50 Award for the #1 Leadership Thinker in the world. He has been ranked one of five most respected executive coaches by Forbes, one of the top ten executive educators by The Wall Street Journal, and one of the 15 Greatest Business Thinkers in the World by The Times. In addition to his client work, Dr. Goldsmith is the author of 36 books, including three New York Times bestsellers that have sold over 2.5 million copies. In this episode, Dr. Marshall yaps about the habits that hold people back from the top, how to change bad behavior with feedback and feedfoward, as well as the power of using his magic moves; optimism, apology, seeking for help, and asking power questions. Fivver: Get services like logo creation, whiteboard videos, animation and web development on Fivver: https://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=51570&brand=fiverrcpa Fivver Learn: Gain new skills like graphic design and video editing with Fivver Learn: https://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=51570&brand=fiverrlearn If you liked this episode, please write us a review! Want to connect with other YAP listeners? Join the YAP Society on Slack: bit.ly/yapsociety Earn rewards for inviting your friends to YAP Society: bit.ly/sharethewealthyap Follow YAP on IG: www.instagram.com/youngandprofiting Reach out to Hala directly at Hala@YoungandProfiting.com Follow Hala on Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/htaha/ Follow Hala on Instagram: www.instagram.com/yapwithhala Check out our website to meet the team, view show notes and transcripts: www.youngandprofiting.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
This episode of YAP is sponsored in part by Shopify.
Shopify simplifies selling online and in-person
so you can focus on successfully growing your business.
Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com slash profiting.
Hey guys, if you're an avid listener of Young & Profiting podcast,
I'd like to personally invite you to YAP Society on Slack.
It's a community where listeners network and give us feedback on the show.
Vote on episode titles, chat live with guests, and share your projects with the group.
We'd love to have you go to Bitly slash YAP Society. That's bit.ly slash YAP Society.
You can find the link in our show notes.
This episode of YAP is sponsored by Fiverr, a marketplace that over 5 million entrepreneurs
used to grow their business. I've been using Fiverr for years. In fact, I got the YAP is sponsored by Fiverr, a marketplace that over 5 million entrepreneurs used to
grow their business.
I've been using Fiverr for years.
In fact, I got the YAP logo made on there, and if you've seen my cool audio grams with animated
cartoons, I get those images from Fiverr too.
They have affordable services like graphic design, web design, digital marketing, whiteboard
explainer videos, programming, video editing, audio editing,
and much more.
They have over 100,000 talented freelancers to choose from, and it's super affordable.
Prices just start at $5.
If you're interested to give 5 or a shot, hit the link in our show notes.
You're listening to YAHP, Young and Profiting Podcast, a place where you can listen, learn,
and profit. I'm your host, Halataha, and today we're speaking with place where you can listen, learn, and profit.
I'm your host, Halataha, and today we're speaking with Dr. Marshall Goldsmith, a pioneer
in the field of business education and leadership coaching who has worked with over 150 major
CEOs.
Dr. Marshall is the only two-time winner of the Thinkers 50 Award for the number one leadership
thinker in the world.
He's been ranked one of the five most respective executive coaches by Forbes, one of the top
ten executive educators by the Wall Street Journal, and one of the fifteen greatest business
thinkers in the world by the times.
In addition to his client work, Dr. Goldsmith is the author of 36 books, including three
New York Times bestsellers that have sold over 2.5 million copies.
In this episode, Dr. Marshall talks about the habits that hold people back from the top,
had a change bad behavior with feedback and feed forward, as well as the power of using
his magic moves, optimism, apology, seeking for help and asking power questions.
Dr. Marshall and I had this interview over Zoom, which is not typical for me, but when
the number one leadership coach in the world
takes the time out to talk to you,
you record how ever he feels comfortable.
Please excuse any phone ringing or computer sounds
during the interview and just enjoy the insightful conversation.
Hi, Dr. Marshall.
Thanks for joining Young and Profiting Podcast.
Happy to be here.
Thank you for inviting me.
So, Dr. Marshall, you are a legend. My generation would call you the goat or greatest of all time
when it comes to leadership and coaching. It is honestly such an honor to have you on the show.
I've read many of your books, been a fan for a very long time. And so my listeners understand
the power of tenacity. I have actually been hunting you down to get you on the show for at least a year now. So needless to say, I am so thankful for your time and I look forward to this conversation.
Oh, very honored to be listeners, you have a clear and concise mission that aims to help successful
people achieve positive lasting change in behavior for themselves, their people, and their teams.
So how did you choose this mission and become one of the most, if not the most sought after executive
leadership coach? Well, what happened is I met a very famous guy named Alan Mallale. Alan was
a boy at the time.
He ended up being a CEO of the year in the United States.
And Alan was working with me and he made a very profound point.
He said, Marshall, your biggest challenge
is a coach is called customer selection.
If you pick the right customers, you will always win.
You pick the wrong customer.
You will never win.
And in my coaching, I don't get paid if my clients
don't get better.
And better is not charged by me or them is charged by everyone around them.
And I noticed that great clients have spent the least amount of time with improved the
most and the clients have spent the most amount of time with sometimes didn't improve at
all.
So dawn on me that, hey, this is not about me, it's about them.
And that came up with this idea of really helping great leaders get even better.
Now at the time, that was a totally unique idea.
Coaching was seen about fixing losers, not about helping winners.
So I really kind of changed the entire field of coaching.
And I have to give a lot of credit to my friend, Alan,
you and I are writing a book together.
We just talked together for an hour right before I called you.
So you received a degree in mathematical economics,
which is very different from what you do today.
So has that education helped you at all? And how did you decide to, you know, move different from what you do today. So has that education helped you at all,
and how did you decide to move away from what you actually
learned in school to go ahead and become a leadership coach?
We know, my undergraduate degree in Mathematical Economics
had nine courses in math past calculus.
I was very good in math as a kid,
and I kind of got burned out on it.
I just really liked the people side more. And
although I got burned out, it's very helpful. When it taught me, it was really logical thinking
and rational thinking and logic. And so it's been very helpful for me because like my friend
Alan, who's a great engineer, I work with a lot of people, who live very strong mathematical
backgrounds. So I think it just from a credibility point of view and a logic point of view, it's
been helpful to me. And I knew that you studied directly
under the father of modern management.
His name is Peter Drucker.
What was he like and what were some
of the key lessons that he taught you?
Well, I feel very blessed.
I mean, I got ranked number one leadership thinker
in the world twice.
My intellect compared to his is that of a 10 year old child.
I was so, so smart. He taught me many things, and I'm going to share just a couple with you.
One is, he said, you know, we spend a lot of time helping leaders learn what to do. We don't spend enough time helping leaders learn what to stop.
He said, half the leaders I meet, they do not need to learn what to do. They need to learn what to stop. Well, that one comment led to my book, what got you here, won't get you there.
Now, the second thing he taught me,
which is really good for younger people
who are listening to your podcast right now is this.
If your listeners don't understand anything I've said,
but this one thing, it's gonna help them
be more effective in life and happier, including you.
So this is just a great thing to learn.
He said, our mission in life is to make a positive difference. Not to be over smart, not to be over
right. Well, we get so wrapped up trying to prove how smart we are and right. We are, we
forget, we're not here on earth to do that. We're here to make a positive difference. If
we don't make a positive difference, it doesn't really matter how smart we are or how right
we are. Then he said, number two, every decision in the world is made by the person as the
power to make the decision.
Not the smartest person, the best person, the fair person, the logical person, the decision
that made based on one and only one variable power.
But if it has power to make the decision, it's going to make the decision.
And he said, if I need to influence you and you have the power to make the decision, there's
one word to describe you.
That's called customer.
One word to describe me is called salesperson. You sell what you can sell. You change what
you can change. If you can sell it, you sell it. If you can't sell it, you can't
change it. Take a deep breath and let it go. It's just such good advice. And before
you deal with any topic, ask yourself one question, am I willing at this time to
make the investment required to make a positive difference on this topic? Am I willing at this time to make the investment required to make a positive difference on this topic?
Am I willing at this time to make the investment required to make a positive difference on this topic?
If the answer is yes, go for it. The answer is no, let it go.
That's a really good advice.
Something else that fascinated me about yourself and something that I feel is really different is that you describe yourself as a philosophical Buddhist. So what steered you towards Buddhism and what is being a Buddhist taught you?
Well, you're a little young for this, but back in the olden days, that was what was called a hippie.
I spent, for example, 1969, three months out on the road hitchhiking. That was like living in
another era. And back in that day, people often study different kinds of religions and philosophies.
So I studied Buddhism.
So I've been a Buddhism verb almost 50 years.
And I'm not a religious Buddhist, I'm a philosophical Buddhist.
Buddha was brought up very rich as father was a king.
He was protected from life.
And then it was living in a kind of bubble.
One day he was able to sneak out of the
bubble and he looked around and he learned something and he said, people get old. Then he was able to
sneak out a second time and he learned people get sick. Third time when people die, he said, you
get old, you get sick and you die, shit happens. Not so good. Then he realized I can't be happy with more
all this money and stuff. It doesn't make any difference Then he went out in the woods and starved himself and he tried to be happy with less
Then he learned to get be happy with less either
He finally realized you can only be happy with one thing what you have
There's only one time you could be happy and it's now and there's only one place you can find peace that's here
Yeah, that's to me the essence of Buddhism. And in my coaching, I teach something called feed forward.
Everybody asks for input.
I teach them to listen to it, to thank people, and they don't promise to do everything,
but you do what you can.
And Buddha said, only do what I teach if it works for you.
That's where I got the idea.
If it doesn't work for you, it's okay, don't do it.
So when people give us ideas to try to help us,
rather than judging them or critiquing their ideas
or putting them down, you know, the learning point is,
you say thank you for the ideas.
That's awesome, super interesting.
So like I mentioned, you are a world-renowned
leadership coach.
Your clients are top performing CEOs and executives,
but it's honestly a bit counter-intuitive to
think that top leaders who have achieved so much success have trouble changing any unfavorable
behaviors that they have on their own and need to seek outside help from people like yourself.
However, I know that's exactly what your popular book, What Got You Here, Won't Get You
There's All About, and you have said in the past that success makes you fail.
So can you explain why that is true and why it's extremely hard for successful people to
change?
Well, you're making a great point.
Any human, in fact, any animal will replicate behavior that's followed by positive reinforcement.
And the more successful we become, the more positive reinforcement we get.
And we fall into something called a superstition trap.
What is it?
Sounds like this.
I behave this way.
I am successful.
Therefore, I must be successful because I behave this way.
Well, the reality is we all behave the way we behave
and everyone I work with is mega successful
and they're all successful because they do many things right and it's been done some
things that are stupid.
And I've never met anyone so wonderful they had nothing on the InSpyto list.
Well, we've all got something on the InSpyto list.
So one thing I'm very proud of in my book Triggers is 27 Major CEOs endorsed the book.
Well, I'm so proud of that. It's
30 years ago. No CEO would admit to having a coach. They would have been ashamed to have
a coach and bear us to have a coach. Well, today they're not ashamed. Well, need help.
Twilight Thorpe, world's greatest choreographer, is it the same personal trainer for 27 years?
Why she had the same trainer for 27 years? I'm twilighttharp, I need help and I'm
okay, that's why she looks so good.
Top 10 tennis players, how many of them have a coach?
10?
Why do they have a coach?
You're trying to get better.
So I think it's really just a healthy way to look at life.
Yeah, so do you feel like there's a right balance between success and failure?
Well to me, on a more existential level,
how do you define success?
I'll give you just a few key variables.
One is be healthy.
If you're not healthy, the rest of this
doesn't matter too much.
Two, you need enough wealth to have at least
a middle or upper middle class kind of income.
Extremely poor people are not particularly happy,
but after you get to kind of a middle level of income
from there on up, more money doesn't make you happier. Lottery winners are not that much happier
for example. So you need wealth to a degree, you need health, you need to have great relationships
of people you love. So, you know, your listener shouldn't get so focused on their career
thing where the people they love. And then assuming you have enough wealth, you're healthy,
you've got great relationship with people
who love what matters, two things.
The first is happiness.
And by happiness, what I mean is you love the process of what you're doing.
You're just doing what you're doing it.
And the second is meaning.
That is the outcomes of what you're doing are important to you.
And what's really important in life is you need to experience both happiness and meaning
simultaneously.
If you just try to achieve happiness
without meaning, well, you know, like for me, when you're older, you're some like old man playing
crappy golf with old people at the country club eating chicken sandwiches and discussing
golgweather surgery. That doesn't work, right? There's empty, it's empty. On the other hand, if you try
to pursue meaning without happiness, you're a victim or or mortar. So you really need to number one, love what you're doing and
two, you need to see it's meaningful to you. And the key to me for success is, no
one can find happiness for you, but you. No one can find meaning for you, but you.
I cannot tell you what you love doing. That has to come from your heart. I can
also not tell you what's meaningful for you.. That is to come from your heart. I can also not tell you what's meaningful for you
That also has to come from your heart. So happiness and meaning to me. That's the ultimate goal of success
It needs to come though from the inside not from the outside
The greatest disease I'll be happy when when I get the money status BMW condominium. I will be happy when
Well, we all have the same win. You know, the key is, you know,
be happy now, be happy with what you have. Yeah, that's so touching and it's so true. You've
definitely got to know from internally what really matters to you and make sure you fulfill those
things. So really great advice. So let's talk about your two most popular books. What got you here won't get you there and triggers.
They've been recognized by Amazon.com as two of the top 100
leadership and success books ever written.
Millions and millions of people have benefited
from your books, which is so incredible.
So as an introduction to the books,
and also your expertise to our listeners,
if our readers had to take away one key concept
from each of these books,
what would that be?
Well, first I'll start with what God you hear from each of their.
Teach people there is ask for input from everyone around you.
How can I be a better manager?
How can I be a better team player?
How can I be a better supplier?
How can I be a better customer?
How can I be a better son or daughter?
How can I be a better father or mother? Better be a better son or daughter? How can I be a better father or mother, a better brother, sister, a better friend, a better family member?
You didn't have a bad internet question. How can I be a better? Then listen to what people have to say.
Again, don't promise to do everything they say. Just promise to listen and think about it.
Pick the most important things for you to improve and then just follow up on a regular basis.
How am I doing? Follow up on a regular basis. How am I doing? Follow
up on a regular basis, get input. And if you do this, I mean, I have research from tens of thousands
of people, they tend to become more effective, not as judged by yourself, but as judged by the
most important people in your life. So that's from my book, Quick Got You're Here, Won't You There.
And my book, Triggers, I'll teach your listeners something to take three minutes a day, cost nothing,
I'll help think it better, it almost anything.
Now some people are skeptical.
Three minutes a day, cost nothing, I'll make it better, anything, sounds too good to be true.
I have to people that start doing this quit within two weeks, not because it does not work,
and quit because it does work.
This is called the daily question process.
And that's, you get out of spreadsheet, you write down a column of questions
that represent what's most important
in your life, friends, family, co-workers, et cetera.
Every question has to be answered with a yes and no,
or a number.
Seven boxes across one for every day of the week.
At the end of the week, the spreadsheet
will give you a report card.
I will warn your listeners in advance
that a report card they see at the end of the week
might not be quite as beautiful as a corporate values
Pike you see stuck up on a wall. I've been doing this for years and you do this every day you learn that life. Life is incredibly easy to talk.
Life's incredibly difficult to live. And if you do this every day, it's humbling. Most people can't do it. I have a woman named Jasmine call me every day.
She's going to call me right after this call. Every day she calls me and she listens to me
read questions I wrote and provide answers I wrote every day. Someone asked me, well, why do
I have a woman call you every day? Don't you know that theory about how to change behavior?
I wrote the theory about how to change behavior. I have a woman called me every day because my name is Marshall Goldsmith.
I got ranked number one leadership thinker coach in the world and
I'm too cowardly to do this stuff by myself and too undisciplined to do it by
myself and I need help.
It's okay. Once we admit we need help life is
better for everybody and this daily question process is amazing.
The first six questions I recommend are number one,
and they all start with, did I do my best.
Number one, did I do my best to set clear goals.
Number two, did I do my best to make progress
for achieving my goals today.
Number three, did I do my best to find meaning.
Number four, did I do my best to be happy.
Number five, did I do my best to build positive relationships. And finally, number six, did I do my best to be happy. Number five, that I do my best to build positive relationships.
And finally, number six, that I do my best today to be fully engaged.
And our research on this is amazing.
Just by asking these six questions every day,
you tend to get better at amazing ways.
And if your listeners would like to get articles,
I wrote one called Leadership as a Context work.
And that talks about the point
I made from what got you here on with you there. I wrote another one called the Daily
Questions from the Book of Figures. If they just send me an email, I'd be happy to send
them copies of both articles, and my email address is Marshall at Marshallgulswitt.com,
and Marshall has two else.
Cool. So let's stick on this daily questions for a bit. Why is it necessary to
make sure that you're asking active questions rather than passive ones? Well, there's nothing wrong
with passive questions. Here's the issue. If you ask like employee engagement surveys, always ask
passive questions. If you ask a person a passive question, we tend to blame the environment. For
example, do you have clear goals?
People say, no, why not?
Well, they're confused.
They have meaningful work.
No, they make me do a trivia.
It's them.
It's their fault.
See, these active questions begin with the phrase, did I do my best, too?
And what's amazing about that phrase is, you cannot blame someone else.
All you have to do is try.
You don't have to succeed. You don't even try.
And that's why the active questions are so powerful. Let me give you the hardest
question you could ever test yourself on every day. It has four qualities. And this is
totally counterintuitive. Quality of number one is you write the question. You write your
own question. Why is that hard? You can't blame the idiot that wrote the question.
Number two, you know the answer.
Why is that making it hard?
You can't say you don't know how to do it.
Number three, you know it's important.
It's not trivial.
And then finally, number four, all you have to do to make a high score is try.
You just have to try.
Yeah.
Young and profitors, do you have a brilliant business idea but you don't know how to move
forward with it?
Going into debt for a 4-year degree isn't the only path to success.
Instead, learn everything you need to know about running a business for free by listening
to the Millionaire University podcast.
The Millionaire University podcast is a show that's changing the game for aspiring entrepreneurs.
Hosted by Justin and Tara Williams, it's the ultimate resource for those who want to
run a successful business and graduate rich, not broke. Justin and Tara started from Square One,
just like you and me. They faced lows and dug themselves out of huge debt. Now they're financially
free and they're sharing their hard-earned lessons with all of us. That's right, millionaire
university will teach you everything you need to know about starting and growing a successful
business. No degrees required.
In each episode you'll gain invaluable insights from seasoned entrepreneurs and mentors who truly
understand what it takes to succeed.
From topics like how to start a software business without creating your own software, to more
broad discussions such as eight businesses you can start tomorrow to make 10K plus month,
this podcast has it all.
So don't wait, now's the time to turn your business
idea into a reality by listening
to the Millionaire University podcast.
New episodes drop Mondays and Thursdays.
Find the Millionaire University podcast
on Apple Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts.
Your dog is an important part of your family.
Don't settle when it comes to their health.
Make the switch to fresh food made with real ingredients
that are backed by science with NOM-NOM. NOM-NOM delivers fresh dog food that is personalized to your
dog's individual needs. Each portion is tailored to ensure your dog gets the nutrition they
need so you can watch them thrive. NOM-NOM's ingredients are cooked individually and then
mixed together because science tells us that every protein, carb, and veggie has different
cooking times and methods.
This packs in all the vitamins and minerals your dog needs,
so they truly get the most out of every single bite.
And NOM-NOM is completely free of additives,
fillers, and mystery ingredients that contribute to bloating and low energy.
Your dog deserves only the best,
and NOM-NOM delivers just that.
Their nutrient-pack packed recipes are crafted by board certified veterinary nutritionists,
made fresh and shipped to your door.
Absolutely free.
Nom nom meals started just $2.40, and every meal is cooked in company owned kitchens right
here in the US, and they've already delivered over 40 million meals, inspiring clean bowls
and wagging tails everywhere.
Ever since I started feeding my dog Nom Nom,
he's been so much more energetic,
and he's getting older, he's a senior dog,
but now we've been going on longer walks,
and he's much more playful.
He used to be pretty sluggish and sleeping all the time,
but I've definitely noticed a major improvement
since I started feeding him Nom Nom.
And the best part, they offer a money back guarantee.
If your dog's tail isn't wagging within 30 days, they'll refund your first order.
No fillers, no nonsense, just nom nom.
Go right now for 50% off your no risk 2 week trial at trinom.com-shap.
That's trinom-n-o-m.com-sh app for 50% off trinom.com slash.
YAP.
Hear that sound, young and profitors.
You should know that sound by now, but in case you don't, that's the sound of another
sale on Shopify.
Shopify is the commerce platform that's revolutionizing millions of businesses worldwide.
Whether you sell edgy t-shirts or offer an educational course like me, Shopify
simplifies selling online and in person so you can focus on
successfully growing your business. Shopify is packed with
industry leading tools that are ready to ignite your growth,
giving you complete control over your business and brand,
without having to learn any new skills in design or code.
And Shopify grows with you no matter how big your business gets.
Thanks to an endless list of integrations and third party apps,
anything you can think of from on-demand printing
to accounting to chatbots, Shopify has everything
you need to revolutionize your business.
If you're a regular listener, you probably
know that I use Shopify to sell my LinkedIn secrets masterclass.
Setting up my Shopify store just took me a few days.
I didn't have to worry about my website and how I was going to click Payments and how
I was going to trigger abandoned cart emails and all these things that Shopify does for
me was just a click of a button, even setting up my chat bot was just a click of a button.
It was so easy to do.
Like I said, I just took a couple of days. And so it just allowed me to focus on my actual product and making sure my LinkedIn masterclass was
the best it could be. And I was able to focus on my marketing. So Shopify really, really
helped me make sure that my masterclass was going to be a success right off the bat and
enabled focus and focus is everything when it comes to entrepreneurship. With Shopify
single dashboard, I can manage my orders and my payments from anywhere
in the world.
And like I said,
it's one of my favorite things to do every day
is check my Shopify dashboard.
It is a rush of dopamine to see all those blinking lights
around the world showing me where everybody is logging
on on the site.
I love it.
I highly recommend it.
Shopify is a platform that I use every
single day and it can take your business to the next level. Sign up for a $1 per month
trial period at Shopify.com.sashProfiting. Again, go to Shopify.com.sashProfiting.all
lowercase to take your business to the next level today. Again, that Shopify.com.sashProfiting.
Shopify.com.sashProfiting.ify.com, such profiting all lower case.
This is possibility powered by Shopify.
They might ask why that's so difficult.
No one to blame.
It's very hard to look in the mirror every day.
No one to blame.
But yourself.
And I've been doing this for years and I've learned about 95% of all my problems.
I can see in one place just look in a mirror.
Very hard to face this for most people.
And including me, by the way, it's hard to do this every day. That's why a woman called me. Yeah. The thing I love about the daily questions is that it really helps to build a habit.
You know, they say if you don't do something daily, your behavior doesn't change.
You don't change yourself. So sticking on habits and what got you there
won't get you here. You outline 20 habits that hold people back from reaching the top.
Some examples are winning too much, adding too much value and playing favorites. We don't
have time to cover all 20 in detail, but I'd love to run through some core themes that
I picked out that relate to these 20 habits. Maybe let's start off with the theme of being too competitive.
So some habits you mentioned that I think fall into this category are
winning too much with holding information, claiming credit when we don't
deserve it, and failing to provide recognition.
So can you talk to us about this type of quote-unquote
bad behavior and how it negatively impacts our relationships?
Well, what happens is we have been programmed to succeed and win.
Every one of your listeners, including you, have taken tests after tests after testing
your life.
I looked up your background.
You're a very good student for point out great average.
You got a lot of reinforcement for doing one thing over and over and proving how smart
you are, over and over and over.
And it's real tough when you've had as much reinforcement as you've had
for proving how smart you are to stop doing that.
See, it's hard.
Every time you made those a's, people pat you on the back,
oh, congratulations.
You're the valedictorian of the school.
And almost everyone I coach is just like you.
They're real, hard, hard working people.
What's hard when you take tests day after day after day,
not to just go through life proving how smart you are.
Now, let me give you a couple examples of this.
Winning too much.
You want to go to restaurant X,
your husband, wife, friend, or partner
wants to go to restaurant Y.
You have heated argument.
You go to restaurant Y.
Food tastes awful and the service is terrible.
Option A, you could critique the food
and point out our partner was wrong.
I mean, this mistake could have been avoided
if only you'd listen to me, me, me.
Or option B, shut up.
Eat the stupid food, try to enjoy it
and have a nice evening.
What would I do, what should I do?
Almost all of my clients, what would I do, critique the food?
What should I do, shut up. Well, very hard very hard for smart successful people not to critique the food.
Another one even worse. You have a hard day at work. You go home. Your husband or
partner is there and the other person says, I had such a hard day today. I had such
a tough day and if we're not careful, we reply, you had a hard day. You had a hard day.
You have any idea what I had to put up with today? You think you had a hard day?
We're so competitive we have to prove we're miserable and people we live with. You have a hard day. Do you have any idea what I had to put up with today? You think you had a hard day?
We're so competitive, we have to prove
for more miserable than people we live with.
I gave the example to my class at Dartmouth.
A young guy in the back raised his hand.
He said, I did that last week.
I asked him, what happened?
He said, my wife looked at me.
She said, honey, you just think you've had a hard day.
It's not over. That's so funny. You know
why we have the urge to want to win so much? What's the meaning behind that? Like why is that so
inherent for humans? Well, we've been reinforced through our lives for winning and proving we're
smart and right. And again, at the lower level of an organization, it's really not so bad.
You can't have to prove yourself.
Every time you get promoted though, you gotta learn to stop doing that.
And the worst thing you see you can do is try to prove how smart they are and win all the time.
At that level, you want to make everybody else sooner. Don't want to make it all about you.
So it's a very difficult transition. One of my customers said,
for the great individual achiever, it's all about me.
For the great leader, it's all about them.
You see, it's hard to make this transition from being an achiever, which is mostly about
me to being a leader, which is mostly about them.
Yeah.
So let's talk about the habit of being negative.
So always kind of giving negative feedback and also starting our sentences with no or
but or
however can you explain that habit to our listeners?
Yes, one of the classic challenges of the smart people I coach is they tend to be a little
stubborn. Now I'm assuming you're not stubborn but many of the leaders that I coach are stubborn
people. So one night I was having dinner with General Eric Shensakey's head of the United
States Army, four-star general. When I'm surrounded by two to four-star generals,
he said, Marshall, who is your favorite customer?
I said, sir, my favorite customer smart dedicated,
hardworking driven to achieve creative entrepreneurial.
It cares about the company and customers'
great values, high integrity.
Stubborn of opinionated, no one at all
and ever wants to be wrong.
I said, sir, you think any of the generals in this very room
may fit such a description? He said, Marshall, we have a target rich opportunity.
Well, there's no but however, thing is the classic problem of stubborn people.
If someone talks to us, first word of mouth is no, would you say, shut up here long or
bite?
What does it bite me?
Just regard everything you said.
One of my clients was stubborn and opinionated, so I was reviewing his 360 feedback report.
He said, but Marshall, I said, that's free.
If you ever do that again, I'm gonna find you $20.
All the money goes to the charity of your choice.
He said, but Marshall, 20, no, 40, no, no, no, 60, 800.
He lost $420 in an hour and a half.
At the end of the hour and a half, he said,
thank you, he said, I had no idea.
He said, I did that 21 times we throw in it in my face.
How many times would I have done an engine up
and threw it in my face?
50 times, 100 times?
He said, no wonder people think I'm stubborn.
The first thing I do when people talk to me
is I provide them more than them, or they're wrong,
over and over and over and over
again. He got so much better being a good listener just by learning that. Yeah a big takeaway I got
from your book is that you need to sometimes just like pause and if you're going to say negative
response or if you're going to say no or but start off with thank you instead and show your gratitude
and one of my favorite stories actually that you tell is about gratitude and show your gratitude. And one of my favorite stories, actually,
that you tell is about gratitude and self-control.
You talk about being in the car with your wife, for example,
maybe on the way to the airport,
and getting loud with her for telling you
to watch out for a red light.
And I've had this happen to me with my boyfriend,
maybe 10 times at least.
So could you tell us about this story
and share the lesson on why the best response?
You can say when you're unsure or when you're going to say something negative is simply
thank you.
Well, you know, it's interesting. Everyone says they want to encourage honest input. We
want people to tell the truth and we don't want to punish the messenger. So I teach my
classes. I always say, how many of you believe you should encourage honest input and encourage
the truth? No one should, they'll up raise their the up raise your hand right and I said well you wouldn't shoot the
message or you'll oh no no of course not then I give this case study you know
imagine you come home from work you've had a hard day you can't go to the store
you're driving the store lots of traffic cars are cutting in front of you people
honking their horns the person in front seat goes look out there's a red light
up ahead you say thank you or did you say what do you mean there's a red light up ahead. You say thank you or did you say what do
you mean there's a red light doing anything and seeing how to drive this car or you'd be quiet
let me drive. Almost everyone in the room shows plan B. So what was it cost to that person saying
hey there's a red light up ahead nothing. What could that have saved your life their life and
their lives of other innocent people. Somebody gives us something that has a fantastic potential
benefit and cost nothing. What should we say to this person? Just say
thank you. Just say thank you and don't beat them up for telling you the truth.
Another thing that you tend to talk about is the importance of family and making
sure you keep your family on the top of your priority list. You talk about your
wife, Lida and daughter Kelly quite often in your work.
So why is being a good husband, wife, father, mother, and essential component of being an
authentic leader?
Well, it's just important to be in a human being.
The reality is, when you're old, you look around your deathbed, none of your coworkers
are waiting to buy.
When I, you start realizing these people are important. They're really matters in life.
And if it's worthwhile to do all this good stuff
to have better relationship at work,
it's even more important at home.
Now, in your case, you mentioned,
you have a boyfriend, is that correct?
Yes.
And would you agree with me that
the customer satisfaction is important?
Yes.
And then we should ask our customers how we can get better?
Yes.
And learn from these good people
Yes, if you've been asking your boyfriend, what can I do to be a better partner? No
See what I mean yeah, this stuff is all easy to talk
When you get down to doing it. We don't do it so much
So you've got an assignment now you're gonna go back home and ask your boyfriend what can I do to be a better partner in this relationship? Yeah, that's good advice.
It's true. And you know, when your home life is healthy and happy, you also become more productive
and clear-headed when you're at work. So I think that it's really important to have balance in both.
You know, that's not a theory. We've got a lot of research on this.
There's an incredibly high correlation
between overall satisfaction with life at home
and overall satisfaction of life at work.
And both of them feed each other.
If you're really more satisfied with life at home,
you tend to be more satisfied with life at work.
And conversely, if you're more satisfied with life at work,
you're also more satisfied with life at home.
Yeah. So let's talk about improving some of these bad behaviors that we were discussing earlier.
You were a pioneer of the use of 360-degree feedback. Can you tell us about this process?
In my coaching, everything that I work with gets confidential feedback from all of their key
stakeholders. These will be their direct reports, their peers,
their managers, could be board members. And then they pick important behavior to improve.
Then they go back and talk to people saying thank you for this feedback. Here's what I've learned,
here's what I'm going to do about it. They practice and feed forward. They don't ask for more feedback
about the past ideas through the future. They don't critique the ideas. They shut up. They thank
people. Don't promise to do everything. They shut up. They think people don't
promise to do everything. And then they follow up on a regular basis. And the follow-up is two
months ago I said I want to be a better listener, based on less two months, and I just for the next two,
they follow follow-up follow-up and then we measure improvement. And again, the people who do this
stuff tend to get better. People who don't don't. Yeah. So I'm not sure which book this was in
exactly, but you say that people change their ways when they feel like something
they truly value is being threatened. Can you talk about this and maybe also
talk about some of the big excuses people have for change? Well, change is
hard. And if we're going to change anything, we really have to have that kind
of what's in for me in terms of values
And that's why feedback is important. Most people do value their families
And they get feedback from their families that they're not doing a good job. They want to get better
Most people value their co-workers. They get feedback from their co-workers. They're not doing a good job
They want to get better. So that's really important in my book triggers. I talk about why we don't do all the stuff we know we should.
And there are a variety of reasons.
Years ago, my biggest client was Johnson and Johnson.
And at the end of my class, about 98% of the people said that we're going to do what I
thought.
A year later, about 70% had done something and 30% had done nothing.
I'm not ashamed of these numbers.
I'm very proud.
70% of 2,000 people is 1,400 people getting evaluated
by 10 coworkers each.
How about 14,000 people have a little better life?
So I'm proud of that.
And I got to interview the people who did nothing.
And I said, why'd you do nothing?
Well, the answer's had nothing to do with ethics values
or integrity.
They went in a word that you're most ethical company in the
world.
They're good people.
I'm sure your listeners are good people. I know to do with, they're good people. I'm sure your listeners are good people.
I know they do with intelligence, they're smart.
I'm sure your listeners are smart.
The reason people did nothing had to do with a dream.
A dream I've had for years, and I would bet even at your
young age, you've already had this dream.
The dream sounds like this.
You know, I'm incredibly busy right now.
You've been working at home and new technology that
follows me everywhere, and emails, and voice,
and global competition. I feel about as busy as you ever have. Sometimes I feel
overcommented. Every now and again, my life feels just a little bit out of control. But you
know, I'm working on some very unique and special challenges right now, and I think the worst
of this is going to be over in four or five months. And after that, I would take two or three weeks and get organized and spend some time with
the family and begin my new healthy life program.
And that everything is going to be different and it won't be crazy anymore.
Have you ever had a dream that resembled that dream?
Yeah.
How many years?
Well, you know what, I'm very much the person who doesn't believe in being busy and it's
a matter of prioritizing, but as a younger person, I definitely acted like that, yeah.
Good, good, good, good.
And so it's really important and we use all kinds of excuses.
Another excuse is one of my favorite is called, it's a special name.
You know, I'm going on that diet, but it's a super bowl.
So I'm going to eat that super bowl pizza and guacamole or it's my birthday or it's my kids birthday or my boss friends birthday or
my mother's birthday, you know, it's somebody's birthday. So if we're not careful, we can
make up this special day excuse to cover almost every day. Every day is a little special
or different and makes an excuse. And so in my book triggers, I talk about all these wonderful
excuses we have and keep us from doing what we know we should. And it's hard. It's hard to face the reality of our lives. That's why the daily
question process is so hard. Yeah. So let's move on to triggers since we're already talking
about it. Can you explain to our listeners what a behavioral trigger is? Well, triggers
in any stimulus that might impact our behavior. It could be a
sight, a sound, a word, a person. Any stimulus that impacts our behavior is
we journey through life. You know, we all have this image of the person that we
want to become. Why don't we become this person? Well, every day we journey through
life, we have these triggers, these events that occur, these sites, and they
usually sometimes push us toward becoming that person. It usually pushes away from becoming that
person. Somebody says something, we become angry, we go off the handle, the driving case
study, you smell something, you feel you didn't want to eat, you told yourself you shouldn't
eat. So as we journeyed through life, very important to realize what are the triggers
in my life that really set off behavior that's inconsistent with the person I want to become.
And how can I number one anticipate these triggers?
So then I can start becoming aware of them before they happen and anticipate them.
If possible, avoid them. And if not possible to avoid them, at least not how to adjust my behavior.
So that I'm not being controlled by these triggers. And if you look at life, you can say, you know, how much do I control and how much am I
controlled?
And you can look at different dimensions.
If you've ever been to motivational speech, there's always a saying, you know, you can do it,
you can do it, it's all up to you, you can do it, or the book, the secret.
If I envision it, it will happen.
Well, you know, it's partly true and partly not so true.
The other view is we're like a pinball machine, pinball bouncing through life,
and B.F. Skinner, the Harvard psychologist, basically, said that we're just
controlled by triggers in our environment. We have no control.
Well, in my book triggers, I think they're both a little bit true.
We have some control. And part
of my life is the function of what I can control. And part of it is I am being controlled.
And the whole idea of the book is really to just balance the equation a little bit more
in terms of I'm in charge of my own life and a little bit less of I'm just being manipulated
by my environment.
Yeah, bam. If you're ready to take your business to new heights, break through to the six or
seven-figure mark or learn from the world's most successful people, look no further because
the Kelly Roach show has got you covered.
Kelly Roach is a best-selling author, a top-ranked podcast host and an extremely talented
marketer.
She's the owner of NotOne, but six thriving companies, and now she's ready to share her
knowledge and experience with you on the Kelly Roach show. Kelly is an inspirational entrepreneur. And I highly respect her. She's been a guest on
YAP. She was a former social client. She's a podcast client. And I remember when she came on
young and profiting and she talked about her conviction marketing framework. It was like
mind blowing to me. I remember immediately implementing what she taught me in the interview
in my company and the marketing efforts that we were doing. And as a marketer, I really,
really respect all Kelly has done, all Kelly has built. In the corporate world, Kelly secured
seven promotions in just eight years, but she didn't just stop there. She was working
in I-5. And at the same time, she built her eight-figure company as a side hustle and eventually
took it and made her full full-time hustle and her strategic
business goals led her to win the prestigious Inc. 500 award for the fastest
growing business in the United States. She's built an empire she's earned a
life-changing wealth and on top of all that she maintains a happy marriage and
healthy home life. On the Kelly Road show you'll learn that it's possible to
have it all. Tune into the Kelly Road Show, you'll learn that it's possible to have it all.
Tune into the Kelly Road Show as she unveils her secrets
for growing your business.
It doesn't matter if you're just starting out in your career
or if you're already a seasoned entrepreneur.
In each episode, Kelly shares the truth
about what it takes to create rapid, exponential growth.
Unlock your potential, unleash your success,
and start living your dream life today.
Tune into the Kelly Road Show available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts.
Hey, Yap fam! As you may know, I've been a full-time entrepreneur for three years now.
Yet media blew up so fast, it was really hard to keep everything under control,
but things have settled a bit, and I'm really focused on revamping and improving our company culture.
I have 16 employees, so it's a lot of people to try to rally and motivate.
I recently had best-selling author Kim Scott on the show.
After previewing her content in our conversation,
I just knew I had to take her class on master class,
tackle the hard conversations with radical candor to really absorb all she has to offer.
Now I'm using her radical candor method every day
with my team to give in solicit feedback,
to cultivate a more inclusive culture,
and to empower them with my honesty.
And I can see my team feeling more motivated
and energized already.
They are really receptive to this framework,
and I'm so happy because I really needed this class.
With Masterclass, you can learn from the best to become
your best anytime, anywhere, and at your own pace. And we all know that profiting in life doesn't
just mean thriving in business. With masterclass, you can brush up on your art skills or your cooking
skills or even your modeling skills. With over 180 classes from a range of world class instructors,
that thing you've always wanted to do better is just a few clicks away.
On Masterclass you'll find courses from many appaulsar guests like Chris Voss and Daniel Pink.
I've been taking their sales and negotiation classes and I've been feeling like a real shark lately.
I've totally leveled up my sales skills. How much would it cost you to take a one-on-one class from the world's best?
A lot.
But with Masterclass annual memberships, it just cost you $10 a month.
I have to say the most surprising thing about Masterclass since I started this incredible
journey on the platform is the value.
For the quality of classes, instructors, the platform itself is beautiful, the videos
are super high quality, you can't
beat it.
Gain new skills and as little as 10 minutes on your phone, your computer, tablet, smart
TV, and my personal favorite way to learn is their audio mode to listen on the go.
That way I can multitask while I learn.
Get unlimited access to every class and right now as the app listener, you can get 15%
off when you go to masterclass.com-profiting.
That's masterclass.com-profiting for 15% off an annual membership.
Masterclass.com-profiting.
Yeah.
Before we move on to environment, let's just dig deeper into habits and triggers and feedback
loops.
Specifically, I'd like you to explain what a feedback loop is to our listeners.
So it's comprised of four stages, evidence, relevance, consequence, and action.
Could you maybe walk us through a real life example of a feedback loop
so that our listeners could really understand what it is?
Well, you're driving your car and you see a sign that says,
speed limit 30 miles an hour coming up in a small town.
And the evidence that something's going to happen. And then how important is it we think I might get a ticket.
And then eventually think that's relevant. And then you've got this evidence which would lead to a consequence which is something bad.
And you ultimately end up changing your behavior. So as we go through life we're constantly given the opportunity to deal with these feedback
loops.
And the important thing is to say, all right, am I being sensitive enough to these feedback
loops?
Am I aware of what's really going on around me?
At first, you have a little child.
A little child says, you know, I miss you, Mommy.
What does that mean?
How can I process this?
And the coworker who seems upset,
being able to read your environment as best you can,
so that you're learning from the environment at all times,
and then you're able to make adjustments in your behavior
that fit the needs of the people in your environment.
Yeah. So when it comes to triggers,
is the key to be aware of them and learn how to avoid or replace
those triggers?
First, become aware.
What are the triggers that set me off?
Then, if you can avoid the triggers, avoid them.
For example, if you only quit drinking, don't go to bars.
If you want to quit smoking, don't smoke.
If you want to quit eating chocolate, get chocolate out of your house.
Because when the stimulus is there, you're much more likely to do it.
So just avoid it if you can is the first thing,
but sometimes you can't avoid it.
So if you can't avoid it,
then you're gonna need to learn to adjust,
to adjust your behavior.
So it kind of fits that.
You know, look, I love chocolate.
I can't get it all the house
because my wife likes to eat it too.
And she wants it to be here,
but I need to realize when I see this chocolate,
I'm gonna be tempted to eat it.
So I have to adjust my behavior so that I don't.
Yeah, and like you mentioned,
like a big trigger is your environment.
So in your book you say,
if we do not create and control our environment,
our environment creates and controls us,
you call the environment,
things like the devil and that we should treat it like our enemy.
Why such the hard feelings could you dig into that a little deeper?
Well, what happens is I'm reading a book now called Deep Work by Kel Peterson
I think and it's a great book. It talks about social media and how we can become completely
addicted to social media in a way that's not healthy. The average kid is flunking out of school in the United States, spends 55 hours a week on
non-academic media.
So it's like an addiction.
And it talks about how Facebook can be addictive and depressing.
The more hours you spend on Facebook, the more depressed you tend to be.
For two reasons.
One, you see all these fake lives.
The vacation is always positive and the kids are always beautiful.
And you think, gee, my life is as good as that.
Well, nobody's life is that good. It's a fake life.
Or you're posting fake lives.
And you realize that's not really me anyway. It's depressing either way.
So I think, you know, very important to realize that we are bombarded by stimulus.
And this hasn't become less real in the New World.
This has become a lot more real. And we need toarded by stimulus and this hasn't become less real in the New World.
This has been a lot more real.
And we need to really back away and say, am I being controlled by this or am I controlling
this?
And if you're not careful, we end up being controlled by this.
So when I was a professor at Dartmouth, a young man used to drive me a limo driver back
and forth, and he flunked out of school.
He's been 25,000 hours of his life playing a video game,
World of Warcraft, 25,000 hours. You get two PhDs in 25,000 hours. You play the video game.
Well, that's an addiction. So you really need to be sensitive to how much am I controlling this,
and how much is this controlling me?
Yeah. Can you talk about some of the ways that we can change our
habits? We talked about the daily questions, but are there any
other commitment devices that we can employ?
Get help in the same way that, you know, I have help, I have
someone call me every day. Why? I need help. If you haven't
fixed it by yourself in the last 10 years, you're probably not gonna fix it by yourself next week. Why? I need help. If you haven't fixed it by yourself in the
last 10 years, you're probably not going to fix it by yourself next week. Just didn't make you
need help. And it's okay to need help. Like I said, my book triggers. Look at the names of the people
who are saying, book, I'm CEO of the United States. I need help. I'm with the presidential
Miller Freedom. I need help. I'm head of the World's largest pharmaceutical company. I need help.
I'm president of World Bank. I need help. Well, they're not too good to get help.
company, I need help. I'm president, World Bank, I need help. Well, they're not too good to get help.
So don't be above getting help because we almost only help. And again, if you could do it by yourself, you would have done it by now. Yeah. So you have these concepts of magic moves. Two of them we covered,
the power of asking active questions, asking for help, which you just covered, but we didn't cover two of them,
apology and optimism.
Could you tell us more about these magic moves?
Well, let's start with apology.
Very important, all of my clients do this.
They all get confidential feedback.
Another more feedback is perfect.
So all they have things to approve.
So the first thing I tell them is,
is say they apologize, say for example,
you know, I've gotten feedback indicates
I need to be a better listener. If I've not listened to you or other people, I'm sorry, they say they apologize. For example, you know, I've gotten feedback, indicates I need to be a better listener.
If I've not listened to you or other people, I'm sorry,
please accept my apology.
There's no excuse.
Well, if you want everybody else to take responsibility
as a leader, let them watch you take responsibility.
Let them watch you take responsibility.
And that's, you know, a very important message
to send a role model to people.
Don't try to be better than everybody else.
Just be a fellow human being and everybody takes responsibility.
The other one's optimism and this has been studied to death.
I mean, if you don't believe you're going to do something, you probably won't.
If you tell yourself, I can't do this.
It's just the way I am.
Well, you probably are right.
You can't do it.
And that's just the way you are. You have to tell yourself, why am I saying this is just the way I am?
Why am I saying I can't do this unless you have an incurable genetic defect, you can probably change.
Well, since almost no one I coach has incurable genetic defects, they can all get better.
You know, you can't make yourself taller. Optimism won't make yourself taller, but you can't make yourself taller optimism won't make yourself taller, but you can become a better listener
or better with people. You can be better giving recognition. These are all positive things you can
change. Not things you can't change. Yeah. One thing that we didn't get to touch on that I think
is actually really important and you just say, looted to it is listening. What makes listening so powerful?
Well, you know, if you want to show concern for other people, you need to be able to listen.
What is the message you can indicate to people when you're not listening? I don't
want to care about what we have to say. Or you. And one thing I teach people on listening,
this is somewhat counterintuitive as this. A lot of people think we don't listen not
by what we say, but how we look. So I was trying
to teach my clients pretend you're on video and you're going to be judged by doing it
look like you care. Number one, it probably helped you be a better listener, but people
will feel you're a better listener. Now, have you ever had this happen before? Has anyone
ever looked at you and said, you're not listening? Yeah. And then have you ever repeated what
they said, verbatim to prove they were wrong. Well, that doesn't really help the relationship. When somebody says
you're not listening, what they're really saying is you don't care. You see if
you look like you cared, no one would ever say you're not listening. What they're
really saying is you don't look like you care. And the higher up you go, the more
important this becomes at the CEO level, this is critically important.
Let's say I'm in a meeting.
I've heard this presentation 20 times before.
I know everything it's going to be said.
It's been vetted 12 times before I see it.
On the other hand, if I look bored and disinterested,
the young person making the presentation,
this will break their heart.
It'll feel terrible.
So I teach people, look, you got to look like you care, and that's not being a phone, that's
being a professional. You got to communicate to that person what you're saying is important
to me, and not just to what you say, and how you look. And if you don't, just be devastated.
So it's a great lesson to learn at all levels of management when you're younger, it's important
when you're older, it's important.
Yeah, totally agree. So to close out the episode, you have an article on ink.com that's called,
do you have mojo or nojo?
And I thought it would be a cute and memorable way
to end the show.
Could you tell our listeners the difference
between mojo and nojo?
Mojo is a positive spirit towards life
which starts on the inside and radiates to the outside.
And you see that when you go to the store,
check into the hotel at the airport, you know, it's that positive spirit which radiates to the outside.
And no joke is exactly the opposite. It's that negative spirit which radiates to the outside.
That spirit says, I don't want to be here, I don't like this, so I'm happy I don't want to talk to you.
So I think very important is we journey through life to look at two things. One, generating
that positive spirit inside ourselves and going back to those questions, you know, am I
doing my best today to be happy? Am I doing my best to find meaning? Am I doing my best
to be engaged, build relationships, generating that positive spirit inside yourself?
And then number two, back to Imagine Your Own Video, generating that positive spirit inside yourself. And then number two, back to imagine you're on video, communicating that
positive spirit to everyone around you. And I think as you mentioned a couple
times, even more important at home than it is at work.
Communicating this spirit of, I'm happy to see you. I love you. You're important
to me. And good to do those good things at at work even better to do them at home.
And how about no Joe?
Well, no Joe is the opposite.
That's, you know, I'm frustrated, I'm angry, I don't want to be here, go away.
I'm going to, I say American Airlines, I have over 11,000,000 Frickles fly miles, I want
a three hour flight.
One flight at 10, it's positive, I'm motivated up, beat it, it's the ESF, I can, the
other is negative bit or angry in cynical.
I'm sure you've been on the same flight. Well, what's the difference? It's not American airlines.
It's the flight attendant. It's what's in our heart. It's what's different. And really, don't get lost
on the environment. Let me give your listeners my final good advice. Are you ready? I like everybody
take a deep breath
Imagine you're 95 years old and you're just getting ready to die right before you take that last breath You're giving a beautiful gift the ability to go back in time and talk to the person that's listening to me right now
The ability to have that person be a better leader and have a happier life
What advice would that wise old person have for the young person that's listening to me right now?
Well, whatever your listeners are thinking now,
do that.
In terms of performance, the prize last is the only one that matters.
That old person says you did the right thing.
You did.
That old person says you made a mistake.
You did.
You don't have to impress anybody else.
So my friends interviewed old folks who were dying
and got this, this question, what advice would you have?
On the personal side, three things,
thing number one, three words, be happy now.
Not next week, not next month, not next year.
Be happy now.
The Great Western disease, I'll be happy when,
when I get that money status,
be in W, condominium, well, I have the same win.
Learning points from old people,
I got so busy looking for what I didn't have, I couldn't see what I did have, I had everything. All your listeners, many of them are smart people,
hardworking people, good people, compared to me, young people. Don't get so focused on what you
don't have, you can't see what you do. Learning point number two, on the personal side, we've
discussed several times, friends and family. You realize these people are important, and number three
is you have a dream go for it.
Because you don't go for it when you're 35.
You may not when you're 85.
And that doesn't have to be a big one.
Maybe a little one.
Go to New Zealand, speak Spanish.
Whatever it is, just do it.
Business advice in which different.
Number one, life is short, have fun.
Number two is do whatever you can do to help people.
And the main reason is that it's not
going to do with money or status or getting ahead.
Main reason to do it is a 95 year old deal
will be proud of you because you did
and disappointed and you're down.
And then finally, go for it.
Old people, we almost never regret the risk we take and fail.
We always regret the risk we fail to take.
And finally, thank you so much for asking me
to be on your podcast.
And I hope that it's been useful to your listeners
and help them have a little better life.
It has.
So where can our listeners go to find more about you
and everything that you do?
Send me an email, Marshall, with two else at
Marshallgulsmitt.com website.
I've got 300 videos online, www.Marshallgulsmitt.com.
Go to any of these sites.
And I have used up on LinkedIn 1.3 million followers.
I can't do any more LinkedIn connections
because they tap out after I think 30 or 40,000,
but I can do more followers.
And so go to any of those sites
and I'm happy to share everything I know with everyone.
Awesome.
It was such an honor.
I want to be respectful of our time.
So thank you so much for joining Young and Profiting podcast. Oh, thank you so much for inviting me and hope we get to see you in New York
sometime. Likewise. Thanks for listening to Young and Profiting Podcast. If you enjoyed this
episode, don't forget to write us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to the show.
Follow YAHP on Instagram at Young and Profiting and check us out at Young and Profiting.com.
And now you can chat live with us every single day on YAP's side on Slack.
Check out our show notes or Young & Profiting.com for the registration link.
You can find me on Instagram at YAP with Holla or LinkedIn, just search for my name, Holla Taha.
Big thanks to the YAP team for another successful episode.
This episode of YAP, I'd like to thank our international gap team members, Christian
and Kayla. Kayla writes detailed show notes for our episode each and every week, and Christian
keeps our website up to date with the latest content. Thanks for all your hard work. This
is Hala, signing off.
Are you looking for ways to be happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative? I'm
Gretchen Ruben, the number one best-selling author of the Happiness Project, and every week we share ideas and practical solutions on the happier with
Gretchen Rubin podcast. My co-host and happiness guinea pig is my sister Elizabeth Kraft.
That's me Elizabeth Kraft, a TV writer and producer in Hollywood. Join us as we explore fresh insights
from cutting-edge science, ancient wisdom, pop culture, and our own experiences
about cultivating happiness and good habits.
Every week we offer a try this at home tip
you can use to boost your happiness
without spending a lot of time, energy, or money.
Suggestions such as follow the one-minute rule.
Choose a one-word theme for the year
or design your summer.
We also feature segments like know yourself better
where we discuss questions like, are you
an over buyer or an under buyer?
Morning person or night person, abundance lever or simplicity lever?
And every episode includes a happiness hack, a quick, easy shortcut to more happy.
Listen and follow the podcast, Happier with Gretchen Ruben.
Can I get a woo-woo-woo?
I'm Lacey Green and I'm a super trainer at Body. That's B-O-D-I dot com.
And you know what's missing from the entire fitness industry?
A program for beginners only.
Not anymore.
I've created a program called For Beginners Only
and it is for everybody and everybody.
It's a three week program only on body,
the world's first health esteem platform.
That means it's a place for you to work on loving who you are right now
as you work on who you are becoming. I'll ease you into exercise with low impact cardio strength, core and mobility workouts that will help you feel great as soon as you get started.
I'll help you build your foundation and show you how simple it can be to make a change just by showing up.
It's for beginners only because I want you to know you can do it.
And I want you to get results.
Let's find a joy and drop the judgment.
And woo, woo, now you can try for beginners only
with your free trial of body.
So there's no reason not to get started.
Go to body.com today.
That's body with an i.com.
you