Young and Profiting with Hala Taha - YAPSnacks: Be a Better Networker

Episode Date: January 14, 2022

Networking can feel overwhelming to say the least. But nearly 80% of job vacancies are filled by networking, which makes it clear that networking is vital for career growth and personal development! On today’s YAP Snacks we’re hearing from some of the supreme experts on networking that we’ve had on the show over the years. We’ll hear clips and actionable advice from guests like Jordan Harbinger, Chase Hughes, Ryan Serhant, and more! So whether you consider yourself a master networker, or need to brush up on your outreach skills, tune in to this episode to level up your community building and create strong connections! Sponsored by -  BrandCrowd - Check out brandcrowd.com/yap to learn more, play with the tool for free, and get 73% off your purchase. Ritual - Visit ritual.com/YAP today for 10% off your first 3 months. Real Vision - Visit realvision.com/yap and join Real Vision for just $1 ! Hirect - Download Hirect - the number 1 hiring app for startups https://hirectapp.onelink.me/YctD/halataha Social Media:  Follow YAP on IG: www.instagram.com/youngandprofiting Reach out to Hala directly at [e-mail] Follow Hala on Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/htaha/ Follow Hala on Instagram: www.instagram.com/yapwithhala Follow Hala on Clubhouse: @halataha Check out our website to meet the team, view show notes and transcripts: www.youngandprofiting.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Hey everyone, you're listening to YAPSNACs, a series of bite-sized content hosted by me, Hala Taha. One of the biggest pieces of advice that I hear on this podcast, time and time again, is that your network is your net worth. But so many people hear the word networking and the immediately cringe. Why do so many people dread the concept of networking? Some of the most common reasons people shy away from networking and making new connections is because they're free to approach new people. Maybe they don't want to come across as forced or fake, or you simply just don't have the time to network.

But the thing is that all experts agree that networking is vital to getting to the next level in your career. The fact is, making connections is vital for business and career growth. According to a study done by Forbes, nearly 85% of job vacancies are filled by networking, and almost 70% of jobs are not advertised on job sites. That means your dream job could literally be out there in the palm of someone's hand, just waiting for you to make that connection and take it.

As a legendary podcaster and my personal mentor, Jordan Harbinger says, your network is your best insurance policy when it comes to your career. Jordan hosts one of the biggest podcasts in the world and he's interviewed so many different famous people, but he still had his fair share of ups and downs. At one point in his life, Jordan lost it all.

He had to rebuild from ground zero, but because Jordan had a lot of strong relationships, he was able to quickly rebuild and come back stronger than ever. In episode number 57, Jordan shared how he really leaned into his network during one of the hardest periods of his life. And how his network helped him make it through. When I left that company, I thought, I am so screwed.

I spent 11 years building a show, a company, I should say, I have to start over from zero. And I kind of pulled a Jerry McGuire where I was like, you know what, I'm sick of this, I'm leaving who's coming with me. And the answer was literally everyone, pretty much, except for my current partners. And that turned out to be a massive blessing because I was able to take my entire team with me to the Jordan Harbinger show. So I didn't have to retrain people, but I did have to start what I thought was going to be from scratch with my audience.

And as it turned out, my network was the best insurance policy that money cannot buy. And what I mean by that is, I made 140 phone calls, I think like the first two weeks that I was out of my, you know what? And I said, here's the switch, I'm in trouble, man. And all of these, literally hundreds of people stepped up

and they said, what can I do? And I said, publicize the Jordan Harpinger show, throw me anything that you can in terms of that. And tell one to two people in your circle, what has happened to me? And let me know if they can help because I can't call everyone. So I would call a hundred 100 people and then like 300 people

would blast their email list, have me on their podcast, make an announcement on their show. I couldn't have purchased that amount of publicity if I'd had $2 million in straight up cash in my garage or under my mattress. It was my network that came and rescued my bacon. And that was something I never, nobody ever says, there's a phrase called dig the well before your thirsty.

I think it's a book by Harvey McKay. And even before that, it was out before that. It's like an African proverb or something like that. Dig the well before your thirsty. The problem is nobody ever thinks, you know what? There's a damn good chance I'm gonna be thirsty pretty soon. Everyone's like, that'll never happen to me. And I was definitely in that camp.

I was like, oh, dig the well before you're thirsty. You know, you don't want to call on relationships and then be needy and I'll get into all that in a second in the how-tos. But nobody thinks my life is gonna super just implode. And then I'm gonna have to figure out how to start from scratch because one, it rarely happens, thank goodness. And two, nightmare scenarios

are pretty rare, just like people whose houses get destroyed in an earthquake. Maybe they're insured for that in California, but a lot of us are just like, well, the odds are slim. That's why I only pay a few hundred bucks a year in insurance because I can replace a couch. You know what I'm saying? Like, yeah, you don't expect this, this type of thing to happen. It's no good way to live. But when it does, if you've dug the well, you are going to be okay. If you haven't, you have your work cut out for you, your screwed. Jordan has never been shy about his story or how he called on his existing network to create something entirely new when he decided to start his own podcast. And that's something that I've had to do in the past as well. When I decided to take YAP to the next level and quit my full-time job, I was scared.

I didn't have that corporate paycheck to fall back on anymore, and I was out on my own. But the fact is, for over two years, I was building my side hustle and building the right relationships. From the podcast community to the LinkedIn community I had built, I had my insurance policy. I had the people who would help me make my dream become a reality. The people who would go out of their way to help me get more opportunities and the people who would have my back if things went left. Oftentimes, it's easier to talk about the end results of all of our efforts, especially when it comes to networking.

But remember that these connections take time. They take energy. They take a lot of persistence and effort. You need to keep in contact with people, especially when you don't need them. That's the key. Jordan told me this is called digging the well before your thirsty.

And he gave me some actionable advice on how to go about it. Yeah, so let's talk about that. It's really important to kind of throw out lifelines to your connections when you don't need them so that when you are in a pickle, you can call on people and they won't be like, oh, like you're just calling out of the blue, I don't really want to help you. You're just showing up out of nowhere. So how do you kind of sew the seeds for your community and ensure that when you do need

help, you have the connections there for you? I love the term lifelines. Actually, I've got an online course that I give away for free about networking called six minute networking and maybe we can plug that like the end or something. One of the first exercises, I don't think it's the first, it's one of the first, it's called layoff lifelines. And so I love the term lifelines. What this exercise is is find, make a list of like 10, 15 people where if you got laid off today, who would be on that list of like, oh my gosh, I better call my old boss. I better call that guidance counselor from school. I got to call my neighbor's dad for growing up because he was successful entrepreneur.

And I know he's got like a multinational companies on the board or something. I better call my, these people like make that list now and reach out to them now because if you get laid off today, that phone call is like, hey Jim, how's it going? Yes, so do you know where I can get a job because I don't know where my next meal is coming from. And they're like, whoa, we haven't talked in like eight years. Yeah. I wish you well, but if you heard of like hotjobs.net, and you're like, no, help me. But if you reach out to them now, and you have no agenda,

and you're like, hey, look, Jim, it's been eight years. I have been garbage at keeping in touch. I like to keep my network going. As I get older, I realize how important that is. I know you're a successful entrepreneur. I should have learned. I should have taken the opportunity to learn from you 10 years ago, but I didn't. Anyway, what's new?

I, you know, do you still live in Michigan? Nothing. No agenda. Just keeping in touch. And then you literally keep that relationship going. Is that person more likely to help you after two years of, oh my gosh, Jordan of guy who I talked to once every three to six months, or is it like this dude who comes out of nowhere? And if you need a better analogy or metaphor, think of it like this or example, I should

say think of it like this. Old friend from high school says, hey, howl, what's up? And you're like, oh, hey, what's going on, Jordan? I think you were in my bio class. And I'm like, yeah, and you're like, you're in your head, you're like, uh, Urbale for Scientology. Like, where are you going to tell me what you are trying to get from me because it sure as hell isn't like what's going on. I heard you have a chihuahua. Like you want something and I am suspicious until I find out what that is. But if I just reach out and I say, Hey, I'm reaching out to people because I've

been crappy keeping a touch and I have kids and I'm 40 and I'm socially isolated and it looks like you're successful. What's up? And then you're suspicious. But then in a month when I send you another message, you're less suspicious. And then in six months after six other messages or two years after 10 other messages, you're like, that's just Jordan. He just keeps in touch and he's a nice person and he's got a career and he's fine.

Yeah. Then if I'm like, uh- oh, I've got a big problem, you are a million times more likely to help me because I haven't tried to hide the ball. I haven't tried. I didn't use you for something. I've been keeping and maintaining a relationship in a way that required very, frankly, very little investment from me other than giving a crap about somebody other than myself for like five minutes a month.

So here's a personal networking hack for me and I'm actually known especially in the podcasting space for being a master networker. I like to make introductions to keep my connections warm. This is my all time favorite tactic for retaining my existing network. And this is the insurance policy that we keep talking about. I like to be of service by connecting my connections with each other. So I'll identify people's needs, and then I'll try to find somebody in my network who's capable and trustworthy to help fulfill those needs. And then I plug those two people together. And I try to do this over and over again.

I like to serve and then create value and seek out opportunities for the people in my network. And then those people are usually happy to return the favor. Generosity is the lifeblood of this powerful network insurance policy. When you constantly dig the well before your thirsty, you create an insurance policy that is renewing for years to come. And when you put out good in the world, it always comes back to you. Okay, so we just talked about taking that first step to realize who is in your existing network.

This is what Jordan said, taking an inventory of who you know, and either resparking that relationship or simply keeping them warm. But what about when you meet somebody new? How do you make that good first impression? Part of that is knowing how to pitch yourself. A network introduction is often called an elevator pitch, and that succinctly defines you in your background and interests, and you can use this at networking events.

The elevator pitch is typically 30 seconds to two minutes long, so think how long it usually takes to go up an elevator ride. And the goal is to introduce yourself, engage your audience, and start a conversation. If anyone knows how to give a good elevator pitch, it's my good friend and sales expert, Richard Moore. Richard has appeared on YAP multiple times, sharing his best practices for selling. When it comes to networking, Rich says practicing your pitch makes perfect. It's about a high amount of exposure to being on the pitch. Basically, the more you can be doing it and interacting with people, the more you will subconsciously pick up on those little nuances and things

that stuff you're not aware of, that's something in your brain that understands and files away and remembers for the next time and those little nuances develop. I can sit down and give people great formulas that will really level them up. For instance, here's how you pre-qualify a lead and find the best person to speak to in a sea of a thousand people looking at your content on nine, for instance. And things like that will make a large difference to your results if you, if you're coming from zero, but the truth is it's always a human sport. And so to move to a place where people are thankful that they get to buy from you and

they're warmed up to the point where an onboarding phone call, if that's the way you do it, for instance, is like a validation that they were gonna buy from you anyway. That requires a lot of elegance and I think that it does come from just feeding yourself with enough interactions with humans, just like if you're networking, if you get the hang of it, if you speak to people enough, you get the hang of it. If you speak to people enough you get the hang of it. All this stuff really is just practice and time on the pitch. So in many ways my success now comes from the fact

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a major improvement since I started feeding him Nom Nom. And the best part, they offer a money back guarantee. If your dog's tail isn't wagging within 30 days, they'll refund your first order. No fillers, no nonsense, just nom nom. Go right now for 50% off your no risk 2 week trial at trinom.com-shap. That's trinom.nom.com-shap for 50% off trinom.com slash app. Aside from knowing what to say when you first meet someone, you also need to give off the right vibes, friend vibes or friend signals to be exact.

You do this by having the right body language. My first guest ever on the show, XFBI agent Dr. Jack Schaefer, used to have to recruit Russian spies to work for the US government, and he's an expert on making friends, even with your enemies. He gave me really good advice back in episode number one, first impressions, on the different friend signals you need to give off when meeting new people. When we approach one another, we tend to, we, we will eyebrow flash each other. So if I approach a person, they're going to eyebrow flash. I'm going to return that eyebrow flash.

The eyebrow flash is a one sixty fourth of a second, quick up and down raising of the eyebrows. And that just tells, it's a long distance signal that tells that person I'm not a threat. The second friend signal is the head tilt. When you tilt your head to one side or the other, you expose your crud at artery. And when you're telling that person basically, I trust you enough to expose a very vulnerable part of my body. So that's sending a friend signal.

And a lot of people who own dogs will recognize this when they enter the home after they've been gone for a while. The dog will sit there and tilt its head or the dog will flip over on his back and expose its underbelly. And those are just friend signals that their dog is telling the owner, you know, I'm not a threat because they are exposing their vulnerable parts of their body. So the last one is the smile. Smile is very important because if you smile at somebody and they smile back, they receive a endorphin, a shot of endorphins. Endorphins make us feel good about ourselves. So if I smile at somebody and I'm getting a shot myself of endorphins, so I feel good about myself, but more importantly,

I'm making that other person feel good about themselves. So these combination of friends signals are how we communicate initially before we even open our mouths. And it's critical that we do these things to let the person know that we are in fact not a threat to them. There's a lot of variations of a smile. If you want to look intelligent and less friendly, you smile, but you kind of half smile. And that gives the impression that you're intelligent and competent. But if you want to look friendly, you give people full smiles. So you look more friendly, but a bit less competent.

To recap, when meeting new people, we want to send friend signals that show that we're not a threat. According to Dr. Jack Schaefer, this includes an eyebrow flash, a head tilt, and a smile. Building your network is also going to take you getting out of your conference zone at times. It's going to take believing in yourself and being confident enough to go out there and meet new people. Human behavior and body language expert Chase Hughes had some great advice when I spoke to him in episode number eight about his approach when going into any sort of networking event. The first thing you need to do before the network event starts is to push yourself as hard as you fricking can

to get up to a level five on confidence, leadership discipline, gratitude, and enjoyment. That alone will make you more magnetic than anyone else in the room. So that being said, everyone wants to teach you the tricks. Here's what to say. Here's how to shake someone's hand. You need to make eye contact. You need to smile. You need to show your teeth when you smile, even if they don't look great. So these are all little tricks. And when you see like networking tricks, how to meet new people, all of that are ways to pretend like you've got your stuff together. So if you think about all the tricks and tactics

of persuasion, they're all ways to pretend or kind of fake someone out into thinking that you have either a confidence, discipline, leadership, gratitude, or you're enjoying yourself. All of those things. So getting those handled beforehand means you're not gonna have to worry about the tricks

when you're meeting new people. But at a networking event, I would say the number one quality that you can have is a genuine interest in other people. At a networking event, everyone wants to talk about themselves, talk about their new product that they're launching, the business they're working on, and they want to talk about their goals, which goes back to that six questions. So those are just kind of those x-ray questions. We'll really help you out in a conversation and just talking to people and having that

genuine interest. And making people feel interesting is more important than making them feel interested. So at the networking event, if you're going to a networking event, be the first one to introduce yourself, be the first one to introduce a stranger you just met to another stranger that you just met. You become the network. So, you become the web as much as possible to the furthest extent, to introduce other people that you just met to someone else that you just met. And you kind of be the glue that kind of holds everybody together. Be the first one to hand out your business card, be the first one to reach out. People, I've been to some networking events here in Virginia Beach. And you see people that are afraid to talk to each other who came to an event specifically designed for people to talk to each

other. So I would say, if there's any place on earth where you have permission to go talk to strangers anytime you want, it's a networking event. Chase said something just now that really reminds me of one of my best pieces of advice that I give when it comes to networking. Be the glue that brings people together. Be the person that starts the group or starts the community. Start that friend group. I'll give you an example. When I was starting my journey on LinkedIn and first launched my podcast, I wanted a support group to help me on that journey. I didn't find one, so I created one. I looked up every single up-and-coming podcaster on LinkedIn,

I sent them a DM, and I invited them to a WhatsApp group. We had a monthly mastermind call where we hopped on Zoom and we hung out face-to-face and shared podcasting strategies. And, you know, four years almost later, we still have the group. And we still hang out together. We host clubhouse events together. We've met up in real life. We've went out to dinner. Many of us have been on each other's shows. We've hosted live events together. Some of these people have become my clients. We've written each other podcast reviews. We've done so much for each other, and these strangers went from being strangers

to becoming my friends, my colleagues, and my clients. And you know what? I'm the one who created this group. So out of everyone in the group, I kind of hold the most value, and people appreciate that I created this space for them to meet and make new relationships, too. The key to making all of this work is finding people who have a common interest and common ground and then inviting them to a place where they can communicate. So slack,

WhatsApp, a LinkedIn group, Facebook group, whatever. And if you're just not that extroverted and you're not the type of person who really goes out and starts groups or communities, find an existing group to join or volunteer. And while the same tenets of networking and connecting will always hold true, the landscape of events is always ever changing. With the pandemic, a lot of networking events have either been canceled or moved to an online space. It's seriously harder than ever to meet new people and make new relationships. There's lockdowns that happen every few months, it seems like, and most of us are working from home.

To be honest, sometimes I don't leave my apartment for days, maybe even weeks. It can seem impossible to meet new people, and we have to get used to the fact that meeting new people online is basically the new normal. It's kind of one of the only ways to do it, especially in the days that we're living in right now. But there are opportunities.

Take Clubhouse, that at Boomed in 2020. And I was on some amazing panels. I had amazing discussions and created a community on Clubhouse. I've met some of my new best friends on Clubhouse that I've hung out in real life with, maybe dozen times already. I even met some of my new best friends on Clubhouse that I've hung out in real life with maybe dozen times already.

I even met my creative director who is now the creative director of YAP Media on Clubhouse. Social audio in general is a great way to connect and have deep meaningful conversations and make real friendships. There's so many different apps coming out like Wisdom and LinkedIn audio now, I predict that social audio will become more and more a part of our networking landscape. And when it comes to social media, don't forget to be engaged with your community. It's not enough to just post content and think that's enough. You've got to thank people for connecting with you.

You have to comment and resharen post. You have to engage in thoughtful conversations in people's DMs. You have to work your land conversations in people's DMs. You have to work your land as Tim's story would say. And the online world is our land right now. So work your community. Okay, so let's get back into the real world. Hopefully in 2022, we resume some sort of normalcy when it comes to real life events.

And I asked Dr. Jack Schaefer, who I mentioned before was the first Yap Gas I ever had on the show. He's an X FBI agent. He's also the author of my all-time favorite book, The Light Switch. And I asked him about his approach to attending networking events when he came on the show for the second time back on episode number 64. And he told me I've got to pay attention to people's feet. Here's what he had to say.

How can we tell who is open to make a new friend? What are the signals that other people give us to tell them that they're open for a conversation or to be a new friend? You know, a really simple way to do this. Look at people's feet. When we go into a large crowd and I was always asked to go to a lot of embassy parties and talk to people and then of course my work and how do you mingle with somebody to get information from them? Well, I discovered if you look at their feet, that's an indication of whether they're accepting additional people into their circle. So if the feet, if you have two people when their feet are face toe-to-toe, they're closed circle. They do not want to talk with you. But if the two people have their feet outward

and that leaves a little hole there in front of them so they're kind of slanting their feet in a V kind of formation, that means it's okay and they're accepting new people. So the rule of thumb is if there's a place to put your feet, it's okay to meet. So there you have it, young and profitors. If there's a place to put your feet, it's okay to meet. So now you have your elevator pitch ready to introduce yourself. You know to walk up with open posture, head tilt, a smile, and an eyebrow flash to give the right friend signals. And the other thing you need to remember is that people love

to talk about themselves. This may seem counterintuitive, but you actually have to let the other person do most of the talking if you want this new friend to like you. You need to try to share less and listen more, especially if you're like me and you're the extroverted type. But don't take my word for it. Let's see what human behavior your expert, Robyn Dree, has to say about it. So if you want to make a connection with any human being, you want to demonstrate that

you value them and you want to affiliate with them. And the easiest way to do that is through these four things. One, seek their thoughts and opinions rather than sharing your own. Two, talk in terms of their priorities instead of yours. Three, validate them non-judgmentally. Have that great non-judgmental curiosity about them and who they are. And finally, you empower them with choices.

When you use one of those four things, the entire conversation shifts from you to them and their brain is rewarding them with dopamine and serotonin and oxytocin and endorphins, the short term and the long term, all the brain is fire and sin. This person is good for me. So what I'm doing is when I'm assessing others, and endorphins, the short term and the long term, all the brain is fire and sin. This person is good for me.

So what I'm doing is when I'm assessing others, are they using that language with me as well? And so that's a very, very quick read and you can make that combined with nonverbal congruence. And although it has good, happy, comfortable, nonverbal displays and you have a really, really good sign of this is someone I can trust. So let me kind of pry into that a bit because I've heard this from a lot of the experts.

I had Dr. Jack Sheifer on the show. He always talks about how, you know, when you're having a conversation with someone, you've got to make it about the other person. It's not about yourself. You just said the same thing. But I have trouble thinking about how can I have a genuine conversation if I'm not actually sharing my own experiences, if I'm not sharing my own stories and perspectives because that actually turns the other person off because you're not talking about them, you're only

talking about yourself. But if you never share anything about yourself or talk about yourself, how does the person actually get to know you? I guess that's where I get stuck when people say, you know, make it about the other person at all times. Well, here's how you make it about the other person all times and you maintain that balance. If you always have to talk in terms of the priorities of the other person, if one of the priorities of the other person is they want to get to know you better at a deeper level, well, then you give them that information and knowledge. You know, so it's actually reading and understanding the priorities. I had some people say, oh, Robin, I'm just introverted.

I don't want to talk to them. I want to sit around and talk to anyone at work. And I said, great, and that's a priority of yours. I'm going to give you your space. And so it's really understanding what individuals' priorities are. So watching and reading the non-verbals, and if someone asks you a question, you can share.

Share as much as you think they want, not what you want. And so you're going to start watching those nonverbal behaviors. You see, are they giving you minimal encourages, you know, nonverbalies to continue with the story? As your dope means starts flung, this here's the challenge. Your brain is now starting to say, this is good for me because you're sharing and you're being accepted non-judgmentally

for the things you're sharing. So your brain is saying, keep going, keep going, keep going. You have to keep watching the other person for any sign of boredom or discomfort by what you're sharing. Then you know it's time to shut it off and bounce back. But no, you share when they want you to share. Don't share when you wanna share. It's the best way to put it.

So I'd like to just reiterate what Robin said. Don't take up too much space in the discussion by talking about yourself, but actually listen to that other person. Share as much as you think they want you to share and look for clues to see if they're getting bored. Like maybe they start blinking really fast or looking away or looking down

or perhaps their feet start pointing away from you and towards the door. And when they're talking, show that you're paying attention by asking questions and repeating some of the talking, show that you're paying attention by asking questions and repeating some of the more interesting facts that you're learning. This is how you show people that you're interested in them,

which will in turn make them interested in you. Another key tip to facing your next conversation is establishing common ground. Common ground is a fantastic icebreaker. Back in Episode 83, Jonathan Havier, CEO of OneSolting Group, talk to us about establishing common ground both online and offline. I think common ground is extremely important because it gets you more comfortable,

and then you don't just talk about work, you talk about things outside of work. So for example, Hala and I have the same kind of background in story, right? But another thing we do have in common as well is of course we're both human. So everybody has common ground technically, but another thing is we have the same mic, right? That's why actually before this podcast I asked Carla, what kind of mic you have? Because I realized that she's most likely had a yeti mic. But do you see that common ground aspect between the both of us now? Now that we have those three things in common, right? And we've only been talking for like five minutes.

See, so that's important because it breaks the ice. I think it's extremely important to do. Another piece of the common ground specifically on LinkedIn is of course the same mutual connections. But the thing is, what I say all the time is you can network so easily by doing something simply just like this. So for example, let's say I make a post, right? Let's just say I talk about a LinkedIn strategy specifically on how to get into Facebook.

What happens is most of the people that like and comment on my things are people from Facebook or people in tech. So what you do is you go comment on it or you go like it and then you go look at the likes and comments and then you go find people who work at the companies you're interested in and guess what? Now we have the common ground because you both commented on my post and now you can reach out to the person saying, hey, I saw that you commented on Jonathan's post,

I did too, you're great to connect. That's a common ground piece strategy for LinkedIn. Another one too as well for in-person. So I'll give two for in-person because I gave a lot of LinkedIn strategies right there. One for virtual. So I have these posters behind me. They each have a motivational quote on it. So someone says greatness, once it's changed, once it's goal. The reason why I have these posters in the back is not because I want them.

It's because every time I speak with someone, it breaks the ice because they always ask about the posters. About 75% of people will ask about it and I'll be like, oh yeah, which one is your favorite? They'll tell me which one is their favorite and then I'll tell them which one is my favorite. But then I'll tailor it towards the company that they're working at. So then it breaks the ice and we talk about posters for five minutes. That's one part specifically for virtual interviewing or virtual conversations that you can do. In person, what I say all the time, research them before, everybody, you can find people before events, not after them. Don't add them before the event because what happens is everybody will add them after the event.

You have to think in ways where you're like, okay, what am I going to do that nobody else is doing? So what I'd say is we have to stand out. Exactly. How to stand out. So we chapsed them before the event. Then when you connect with them, you go meet them at the event or virtually or in person, then after you send a follow-up. Because then most people are gonna be in the personalized invites or whatever, you're gonna be the one person who isn't, and that's when you build that rapport before. So those are the two things I'd recommend, hopefully that's helpful.

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have settled a bit, and I'm really focused on revamping and improving our company culture. I have 60 employees, so it's a lot of people to try to rally and motivate. And I recently had bestselling author Kim Scott on the show. And after previewing her content in our conversation, I just knew I had to take her class on master class, tackle the hard conversations with radical candor to really absorb all she has to offer. And now I'm using her radical candor method every day with my team to give in solicit feedback, to cultivate a more inclusive culture, and to empower them with my honesty. And I can see my team feeling more motivated and energized already. They are really receptive to this framework, and I'm so happy because I really needed this class.

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you can get 15% off when you go to masterclass.com slash profiting. That's masterclass.com slash profiting for 15% off an annual membership. Masterclass.com-profiting. Moving along, the most challenging part of networking is actually after that first initial interaction. It's the follow-up. Keeping in touch with others, especially if you've managed to grow your network in large numbers, is not easy.

How much is too much follow-up? Do you send an email, a text, do people even talk on the phone anymore? Lots of things can feel up in the air once you've made a new connection, but don't put too much pressure on yourself or the relationship. Do what feels genuine to you in your follow-up, but sure that you do, in fact, follow up. For this last piece of the puzzle, I'd love to share more from founder and CEO of OneSolting Group, Jonathan Havier,

who will also talk to us about the importance of follow-up back in episode 83. His example of follow-up specifically has to do with following up after sending an invite request on LinkedIn when looking for a new job. So a mistake that people make is they don't follow up. They think that you send a personalized invite and then they'll respond.

Most people actually won't respond because they're super busy or they just click connect, connect, connect, connect, or accept, all right. So you have to follow up and you have to follow up like within the day, I think. It's very important. Just follow up saying, hey, you know,

thanks for adding me on LinkedIn. I appreciate it and then go into your little pitch or your little story. That's very important because yeah, a lot of people like this said before, don't follow up. Another part to as well is, it's okay if people do not respond. I see this all the time. I think what happens in nowadays is that people dwell on the individuals that don't respond versus the ones who do. Reach out to 100 people. If 99 don't respond, who cares? If one person does, that's what matters. Are you going to focus on the 99 people who don't respond or the one person who does? That one person could make the difference in the world, especially in your career. So that's what it all takes. It's at mindset piece, like I said before, right? You might get rejected

from 99 companies, but you might get one offer. That's what matters. It doesn't matter about the 99. Same thing with messaging. You might say 99 message, you might only get one response. And if a person does not respond, you move on. It's that simple. Don't dwell on it.

Dwell on the future instead. The idea of following up is simple enough, but it can often fall by the wayside. Making follow up a habit is a great way to make sure that it actually happens. Jordan Harbinger practices follow up on a daily basis with a tactic he calls Connect4, which he shared with us last time he was on the show. Yeah, so Connect4 is something I do every single day in the morning, usually weekdays, honestly. It's not always four people. Sometimes it's one or two, but I scroll, I open up my phone or I message or whatever.

I scroll all the way down mostly to the bottom. And there will be text threads there because it sorts by most recent as you are aware. I go and I find somebody where I'm like, oh my gosh, this date on this thing is like 7, 12, 2018. What is this guy doing? He's like a YouTuber that I ran into at a convention and then we ended up splitting an Airbnb because the hotel res fell through. Like people like that.

And or just a friend that you've lost track of or lost touch with and I'll say, hey, what's going on? I've done a bad job keeping in touch. Or I say, hey, it's been like a year or two. What's news with you? I had a kid, I got married. I'm not sure if I told you that.

I moved up to NorCal. I know you were in LA or you still out there. What's the latest? No rush on the reply. Just get back to me whenever you can. And I'll go through why that script is important. But a lot of times those people will respond and go, Jordan, oh my gosh, I haven't heard from you in forever.

Yeah, the last time we saw each other was at that conference in San Diego with a hotel res fell through. And you know, you get the conversation going, usually it falls off after three or four texts because we both have lives and we don't really, there's not a whole lot going on there. But I keep that refreshed. And it makes sense.

It's really easy. It's really scalable. It doesn't take up time. I was going to do somewhere else. Like this is, you can do this between sets on the, whatever machine at the gym in the morning. Like this is Starbucks, coffee line, drill, activity. This is not something that takes half an hour.

Takes like two minutes. So the reason I do that is because those are your weak endormant ties. And if you re-engage those, what you'll find is most of them will either not reply fine, or they will reply and nothing will come of it. It'll be like, yeah, I'm reviewing VR gear on YouTube. Cool. If I ever run into anybody, it's a good connection. I'll make that intro later, but whatever. Usually nothing. But one out of, let's say, like 10 or 20, which is a few every week if you're doing four people a day.

What happens is someone will hit me up like in two months and go, hey Jordan, do you ever do speaking? And I'll say, yeah, why? You were top of mind because we talked the other day and I'm walking into my annual sales meeting and we're looking for a keynote speaker. We've got a $20,000 budget.

It's in a nice resort in Florida. Would that be something you're interested in because I'm throwing a few names in the hat? And I'll be like, yeah, I would love to do that. You will get opportunities like that. And sometimes they'll say, Hey, do you know anybody I can hire for XYZ job? Maybe I'm not looking for a job, but maybe someone else in my network is looking for that. And then I have an opportunity to help the person who just texted me and asked, and I have this amazing opportunity for somebody else in my network who may be as a graphic designer, and it will be super grateful to have a corporate client that I just grabbed out of thin air.

And I make that introduction, and it cost me nothing. I mean, it cost me seconds of my time. Another super actionable piece of advice for following up comes from real estate rockstar Ryan Sirhont from episode number 59. Ryan tells us about his foolproof rules for maintaining connections, the three F's. Follow up, follow through, and follow back. These are the steps he takes to gain clients, to keep clients, and to keep them coming back for years to come.

Through this process, he was able to close millions of dollars in sales every single day. So it's called follow up, follow through, follow back. It's my three Fs and I do it every single day and it's in my calendar. In the morning, first thing, I follow up with everybody from either yesterday or the week or everybody that I need to follow up with, hey, you said you were going to do this. Hey, this is happening. Hey, just wanted to touch base. Hey, there's this listing, whatever it might be. Follow through is doing what you say you're going to do.

So if I tell someone I'm going to send them something by noon, you actually do it. Something my dad taught me really well. Like you were only as good as your word. And if you say you're going to do something and you don't do it, you were forever banned in people's minds. If you say you're going to be there on time, be there on time.

If you say you're going to be late, then, okay. Just be honest, be upfront, and follow through with what you say you're gonna be there on time, be there on time. If you say you're gonna be late, then okay. Just be honest, be upfront, and follow through with what you say you're gonna do. And then follow back, which is really important, is every day I follow back with past clients. Finds I sold things two 10 years ago. People I met last week who aren't even interested, just touch and bay, saying, hey, what's up?

Following back with deals that died, maybe I could put it back together, and that it is the lifeblood of my career in the way that my team does our deals, right? Non-stop Important valuable follow-up. Do you think the time investment that you put into follow-up is worth it? Oh my god. Yes follow-up. It's free. That's the thing. We're in a service business. Everybody's in a service industry So it's it's all free. It's just'm going to have a phone email in a calendar anyway. So it's just putting things in my calendar and then actually doing it.

And sending an email, sending, especially in 2020, like setting an email, a text, a quick phone call or a DM is all free. You're going to do it anyway. So like Ryan said, follow up is free. It's super simple, but it's really powerful. The more time we put into our follow-up, the bigger return on our networking investments. Most of us use our phones and email every day, so carving out time for follow-up, follow-through, or follow-back, with the people in our network

is going to keep these relationships fresh and strong. So we've heard some killer experts give us their best tips for leveling up your networking skills. Not only can networking open up doors to new career opportunities, but with a proactive approach to your network, you can build your own community to get you closer to your goals. By having the courage to go out of your way to create new connections, by being interested in these new connections, giving all friend signals, finding ways to serve them, and keeping in touch new connections, giving off friends signals, finding ways to serve them, and keeping in touch even when you don't need something,

you can create an ironclad group of people who want to see you succeed, who will go out of their way to bring you opportunities, and who will have your back when things get tough. Your network is your insurance policy. Never forget that. Thanks for listening to this week's YAP Snacks on how to be a better networker. I hope you learned some actionable advice that you'll use ASAP to build a community of your own. What did you think about this episode?

Tell me your main takeaway by leaving us a review on Apple, Casbawks, Spotify, or your favorite podcast platform. You guys can find me on Instagram at YAP with Hala or LinkedIn just search for my name. It's Halataha. Big thanks to my amazing Yapp team as always. This is Halah signing off. Are you looking for ways to be happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative? I'm Gretchen Rubin, the number one best-selling author of the Happiness Project. And every week, we share ideas and practical solutions on

the Happier with Gretchen Ruben podcast. My co-host and Happiness Guinea Pig is my sister Elizabeth Kraft. That's me, Elizabeth Kraft, a TV writer and producer in Hollywood. Join us as we explore fresh insights from cutting-edge science, ancient wisdom, pop culture, and our own experiences about cultivating happiness and good habits. Every week we offer a try this at home tip you can use to boost your happiness without spending a lot of time energy or money. Suggestions such as follow the one-minute rule. Choose a one-word theme for the year, or design your summer.

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