Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - The Most Anticipated Meal Ever w/ Fancy Chef | Your Mom's House Ep. 780

Episode Date: October 9, 2024

SPONSORS: - Save time and money on providing a financial safety net for your family. Head to https://policygenius.com/YMH to get your free life insurance quotes and see how much you could save. - Choose chill and Get Coors Light delivered straight to your door with Instacart by going to https://coorslight.com/YMH - Try VIIA Hemp! https://bit.ly/viiaymh and use the code YMH! - Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/momshouse, all lowercase This week on Your Mom's House Podcast, get ready to experience the fanciest episode of all time! Tom and Christina are joined by the one and only fabulous Fancy Chef! Before Chef lights the fires, Tim and Christine open the show talking about some tit cancer treatments and some hot survivors of this not so hot disease. They then open the show with a clip of Fancy Chef announcing his intentions to make his way to Texas! Tom also shows off some great finds including a really cool lady talking in the tub and the YMH staff details the elaborate process of booking Fancy Chef for the show. Fancy Chef makes his anticipated entrance and joins the Main Mommies to talk about his life, kitchen experiences, and how fancy Fancy Chef really is. After chatting with Tim and Christine, Chef gets going with crafting a complete 5 course meal live in YMH Studios! While Chef cooks each dish, Tom and Christina continue chatting about some cool gals, the Menendez brothers, their favorite dining spots, and Josh Potter's eating habits. Chef eventually gets cooking and serves dinner before sitting down with Tom and Christina one last time to express his gratitude for sharing his food with them. Hope you're hungry, because this is a wild, not to be missed episode for sure! Your Mom’s House Ep. 780 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinaponline.com/tour-dates https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Pre-sale tickets for Come Together 2025 World Tour dates are available now with the code word Tommy I'm coming to over 35 cities across the US and Europe. Don't worry if you don't see your city I will do my best to get there next year get tickets now at Tom Segura comm Tour I can't wait. I'll see you soon. Welcome, welcome to your mom's house. Welcome to your mom's house. Welcome to another episode of your mom's house. A quick reminder that coming up here in just over a week, I will be in San Diego and Phoenix as part of my tour.

We also announced some 2025 dates if you have not gotten tickets yet. We've added a bunch of cities, but I'll be in New York, I'll be in Chicago, I'll be in Austin and Boston, and so many more. So go to tomscuro.com slash tour for tickets. And I thank you and I will see you there. Jean, how are you today?

I'm good. I came from, I'm doing radiology. Just for fun? Just for kicks, radiation. And it's not as awful as I thought, even though I should be telling you it's way worse than it is so that I get more sympathy and stuff. I'll tell you about Invisalign in a second, but go ahead. Anyway, I wanted to tell you, so this morning I went before we record, and the radiation waiting room is lit.

Cause it's mostly older people who are like, I don't know, this could be my last. Mm, you hear a lot of moans and noises. So many moans, it's so sad. Ah. But today I saw a granny, like a legit granny with the curly hair. We were sitting waiting to get called in

to get your radiation. And she was reading a pornographic novel. That's awesome. Yeah, and she didn't even look up. Like usually when I come in. She's lost in it. And she was, it was so horny and awesome for her. Yeah, and I was like.

Did you get the title by chance? I forgot, I'm forgetting everything these days, but it was horny and the cover was like hot. That's hot. And I was like, dude, no way. And then as I was leaving the oncology center, I saw a woman roll in in a purple Camaro, smoking a cigarette.

Wow. That is so hard fucking core. Hard fucking core. To roll into the cancer building, smoking a cig. You gotta give it up to the folks that beat it and then keep doing that shit. But I kind of get it now. They're already, they are predisposed to cancer.

They've beaten, and then they're like, well this is the stuff that'll fuel it up again, so let's just do it again. This is what I want. That would be like me getting back on hormones, because my tumor was hormonal. It was fueled by, I mean, I know there was a lot of non-oncologists that weighed in on their thoughts

of what caused your cancer. The internet's, so many people weighed in. You know, the medical community explained to you that it was actually fueled by hormones. Yeah, that's true, yes, yes, yes. That's you that it was actually fueled by hormones. Yeah, that's true. Yes, yes, yes. That's not what it was. That's not what it was.

You know what it was? Gluten. It was gluten, it was aluminum in your deodorant. I've been wearing deodorant for years. Well, you can listen to the fucking doctors if you want, but I would kind of read through some YouTube comments and figure out what was going on. That's probably what it helped you out.

I've been drinking my urine steadily. Yeah. And I think that's really what you're- Well, that's definitely gonna help. Yeah. Call Will and he'll tell you right now. It has, Karen. I was holding guys' cocks when I go out in public

just to fight cancer myself. I just hold his dick and I go, oh, I feel less cancerous right now. You know, it's just whatever you're interested in, you go with that. The medical industrial complex, don't believe the hype. Don't believe what? I'm not sure what the answer is right now. You know, it's just whatever you're interested in, you go with that. The medical industrial complex don't believe the hype. Don't believe what?

They're just trying to kill you, they're trying to get you to stay overnight, they're trying to pump you full of medicine. Don't fucking listen to that shit. You want to know what's going on with your body, you go on Instagram and you fucking post something and just read those comments and you'll figure it out. You'll find some hippie in a forest to tell you how to cure it.

They'll tell you exactly how to beat this shit. You know, there was this article, which model was it? She was diagnosed with breast cancer as well. Is it, will you look it up, my love? It's a, it's an old white lady now. An old white model. An old white model. Shit. Anyway, she was diagnosed with breast cancer and she opted to go treat it naturally. But she wrote a book about it too, I believe.

Yes, Elle MacPherson. God. She revealed she was diagnosed with breast cancer seven years ago, nicknamed whatever, that's her name, the body. Talk about a genetic anomaly this woman. Oh, she's stunning. She's stunning.

And so she says, oh, I went and I went and I did meditations and I changed my diet. But if you really listen to what she's saying, she's like, I went to like, it sounds like she went to a really fancy holistic center in addition to chemotherapy and radiation, maybe. Leaves out that part or what? I don't know, you can't just eat papaya to cure breast cancer.

I wonder if I drank her pee if I would fight cancer. Oh, that's interesting. You know? You drank, I wonder if that was her piss. I mean, she's Elle McPherson, you know? Is she your gold standard jack-off when you were, how old is, how older is Tom when he finds Elle McPherson? When I find Elle Mcick Fiersen?

I'm probably like, yeah, right when your dick starts to get hard and you go like, what's going on? So like young teen, 12, 13, something like that. Stunning woman, truly beautiful. When she was a swimsuit issue model, it was fucking crazy. She was a part of a beautiful, Christy Brinkley too. You know what's crazy? At that age, at that age in your mind. You're like if she could just meet me. Yeah If I could just talk to her I could just talk to her

I bet you should be like, I don't know what I'm doing with these fucking Billionaires on their yachts. That's funny. I want to date an eighth grader. I Used to think that about Robert Smith from the Cure Really? Like if he could just see me. If Elle could just see me, she'd get it. He'd like fall in love with me. I'm talking young. We definitely have different types.

Young Robert, okay, there we go. That guy, yeah. If he could just meet me at 16 and see how truly goth I was, and I somehow believe that if I could show him I was goth enough Then he would like me, you know, he's very funny. Every time I see a clip with him. It's very funny Yeah, he's like, oh my god, Robert Smith Are you excited to be inducted into the music hall of fame? He goes not as excited as you apparently Yeah, I don't know. I wonder if he's fun.

I think he is. I mean, he looks like he parties. He didn't get that physique, not having fun. He didn't get up in cold plunge today. He sure didn't. Nope. You did. That's right.

You did, you did the plunge. You know, it's a good way to wake up. Good for you. But did you sauna too? I didn't. No, you didn't really complete the cycle. I know, I didn't complete the cycle complete the cycle I did press super early. I was super early seven, you know, that's terrible. You have to be like ready for it. So

Yeah It was good. How'd you get ready? How'd you get ready to the punch got cold? Yeah Got cold. It was funny cuz I was on I was on a press call and they were like, and all your tickets are all sold out. And I was like, that's not true. That's why I'm doing this right now with you. And they were like, what? I go, this is a new show we're announcing.

I would like tickets to sell. And they were like, oh, OK. I'm like, yeah, do you think I was coming on here just to shoot the shit? Like, I'm here to promote it. Was it terrestrial radio, like old school? Yeah, but it was live. So it was like during drive time, you know. So it terrestrial radio, like old school? Yeah, but it was live.

So it was like during drive time, you know. So it was one of those things. Oh yeah, yeah. They were sweet. Tops of Guerra, tell us, what can the audience expect to hear from your act? It's 6'45 at the board right now. And your funny, funny routine,

what can they expect to hear? Do you and your wife make each other laugh all day? You're both comedians. I'm like all the time, 24-7. I bet your house is just, just you crack each other up. It's a barrel laughs you're going back and forth and how do you get any work done? I bet your kids are funny too. Yeah yeah they are they're very funny. Okie dokie. We haven't even done the opening clip. Well you're not ready for the opening clip. Uh oh. And neither is this audience. Okay. Because if you

haven't been following this closely this is the most excited I've been in a long time. Yeah. Doing this show. Are you ready? I'm ready. Here we go. Let's do it. How Beyonce said it, I'm going to Texas.

Beyonce came out with that country song. I'm in Texas. And a couple of days you're going to see the chef in Texas. I'm going to be doing some great things. I'm going to be doing a podcast. I'm going to be cooking on the set. Any one of you got a podcast. I'm not coming to talk I don't want to talk I'm coming to cook you can talk to me while I cook why I shut it up I'm opposed to podcast. Well, you know, I'm believers all you ones that say you don't cook

I've been cooking for 40 years 40 years and I ain't gonna stop baby. You better watch me good, baby Big shout out to Joe Rogan big shout out to mr. So Gouda can't say his name pronounce the wrong But anyway, I'm saying to every one of you watch that watch out watch out. The chef is coming Wow. Yes. Tom Segura. Malishit speed. I'm gonna get back into drumming Are you I mean this is it? Nothing could be fancier. This is the power of the internets. You just got to know this guy and by the way he shouted out to Rogan

should we send him over to Rogan's after this? He loves he loves to eat. Joe loves to eat. Yeah. So I, it would be a real treat. I mean, I'm assuming it might be another $300,000, so I'm not really sure if we're in a position to do that. But maybe I could tell Joe, you know, you can afford it. Could you imagine if we paid to have him cook at Joe Rogan's house? Joe's like, what the fuck is this?

What the fuck did you send over to my house? I'm like, fucking fanciest chef in the world. What are you talking about? I mean, oh my God, he'd stop talking with. I'm so, fucking fanciest chef in the world. What are you talking about? Oh my God, he'd stop talking with. I'm so excited though. I know you are, but you know who isn't is our very own Josh Zolo. I was watching your face when we were playing this and I could just see the look of stress and despair. Well, for people that don't know, Josh has had the privilege of working with Fancy

to get him here. And from what you've said, it hasn't been, I mean, also to be fair, huge artists are notoriously sometimes difficult to work with. Deva. We've been talking for a few weeks, and I mean, you know, we have a lot of great people come through here, and you know, like you said,

a lot of artists, they can be a little eccentric, a little hard to pin down. They have their requests, but, uh, yeah, he's definitely, uh, kind of taken the, taken the record for most requests and just given me the run around a little bit, but, um, what kind of requests is he making?

I mean, uh, he's called multiple times about different chef jackets and hats that he needs and They they change every day what he wants He really wanted one that was embroidered with YMH from a specific company and then he's like don't worry about the hat I'll bring the hat. He just called me. I think you guys heard he's like I need hats You need a pack of hats for me You know all yeah all He also requested

Quite a bit of cooking equipment, right? We have a whole kitchen's worth of Everything he could possibly want we have we have the nicest plates and settings and everything was real big on that I don't fuck with paper plates. Did you go to Home Goods though? Mm-hmm He was real big on that. I don't fuck with paper plates. Did you go to Home Goods though? Mm-hmm. Wow. So you went to Home Goods. Wow.

Now the real question, I guess, next, and maybe this will be upon arrival, because we did discuss when we spoke to him last time that I was like, oh, what's on the menu? And he was like, fucking anything you want. And I was like, sea bass. And he was like, yeah, I don't really fuck with seafood. And I was like, interesting. But what will actually be cooked is a thing. He keeps saying New York strip, New York strip

and red potatoes and seasonal fruit. That's been the update I've gotten. I'm excited for that. Yeah. But I'm wondering, will he, how will he fancy it up? Will there be cups and will he put it, cut up the steak, put it in the cup with some strawberries and ranch? We don't know how he's gonna mix all this up.

Hey Picasso, how are you gonna paint this woman? You're right, you're right. What am I thinking? I mean, just give me a brush and a canvas and you'll look at the end result, you know what I mean? I know. That's kinda what you're doing there. So he's been a little evasive.

A little bit. Okay. Yeah, it's been really hard to lock down any kind of logistics, like where we could pick him up at, you know, arranging cars. Yeah, we actually have a little bit of footage here from your call. Yeah. Wow.

That was, you've cut down into multiple clips for us. This call was 20 minutes long, trying to just get one answer, which is where can we pick you up? We put a lot into the time we spend with our loved ones. Extend that care, comfort, and peace of mind to what happens when you're gone. With Policy Genius, you can find life insurance policies

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Okay. Here we go. This is. So right here, he's talking to somebody else. He's on a different call while he's on with me, scheduling a yacht party. I'm not meeting her. I'm asking another line on phone. So, Lauren, as well? Are you able to pick me up? I can't remember the actual number. All right, tell him.

I mean, don't hang up, tell him. I'm still here. I'm here. All right. Um, and what's that gonna say? Um, um. So, one thing is for sure. His phone does ring nonstop.

Yeah. He's always on a phone call. It also appears like he's blocked me on two of the three numbers. What's that all about, you think? on a phone call. It also appears like he's blocked me on two of the three numbers What's that all about you think I don't know. I mean it might be an accident. Mm-hmm. I Did notice that um, I jumped on one of his lives and the phone rang the entire fucking time Yeah, the entire time is he publishing this phone number on Instagram all the time. Yeah multiple numbers He gives up multiple numbers all the time. Yeah, he's like book me book me book me stop thinking book me book me five seven oh two

So then he's like seven two. Hey, it works. It got us and he's obviously he's gonna meet somebody at the club And then here's more clips from your phone call with fancy But I can't give you an address. I don't know where it is. I signed an MBA. And when I leave, you signed an MBA? Yeah. So this was, he was saying,

don't send a car service to pick me up. Yeah, yeah. Because we really felt like we need somebody to be with him to ensure that he gets to the airport. Don't know why, but go ahead. And he would not give us an address. And then he said, he said he can't give us one

because he's gonna be on the movies Going from event to event and I'm like, oh, you're not gonna be at home He also said he signed an MBA an MBA which was why he couldn't give me the address of the event He was gonna be an MBA. Yeah I think I don't know Josh. I can't I don't know the sound I don't I'm being honest So I go from one place to the next place one place to the next place one place in the next room Give me a landmark. I'll take a landmark A landmark to pick him up. He doesn't have a home address. He says I don don't, I don't want to give it to you. He definitely has a home. He's always at home. Right, but he's doesn't want to give out where

he is because of the MBAs or he's moving around. It could be MBA related. He also didn't end up giving me a landmark either. Oh, he didn't? No. So how did we send a car? Where did we send the car? We finally got an address, which I could not

confirm if it was his address or an address, but we sent a car somewhere, but I talked to him this morning and he said he was on the train. To the airport. To the airport. So. So he bypassed our offer for a ride and he's on a train. Well, I'm glad we paid for that.

Let me see what else we got? I got a thing, man. I got a thing, I got a thing. I got a thing, Josh. Hold on, don't, don't, don't. This is a cancer. My brain is every time. I have a sputum. I have a hell of a place in my brain. Do you live in Miami? I do. Could we put that down for now?

No. Wow. He really is an eccentric artist. He really is. Yeah. Yeah. I get it, you know? And especially now that he's blowing up. This is how they are, the great chefs.

They do. I'm excited to see his process. I could not be more excited. I'm filled with anticipation because of the fact that it's so unlikely that he will board this plane. So I'm just, I cannot wait for the message from you tomorrow. I don't know if I'm gonna sleep tonight. I'm just gonna be waiting for you to be like, we got eyes on him.

And that's gonna change my whole day. Will he or won't? Fancy chef, show up. Will he or won't he? This is the greatest mystery. When he, on his live and his phone was ringing, he would answer the phone, he would go, fancy here. Just answer the phone, fancy.

That's just it. We don't even know his real name. He's just a fancy guy. I know, he would go, Fancy here. Just answer the phone, Fancy. That's just it. We don't even know his real name, he's just a fancy guy. I know, he's just fancy. Speaking of future stars that we've discovered, I mean, they're just coming out of everywhere, you know? If you follow my Instagram, and you consider yourself a friend of mine,

I've got something to request of you. Please tell other people about my Instagram. Yeah. Got it. I really, really want to grow my social media profile. And I would consider it an act of friendship if you just informed other people about my Instagram and suggested that maybe they start checking my Instagram out.

Now you have a lipstick line. Can I tell? What's going on with hers? You know what? As somebody who. I think this is a great model for my lipstick line. I think you're right. I would love to hire her.

I'm telling, I'll tell you what, laugh if you want. She's engaging. I'm curious to know what's going on in the bathtub. She's splashing water. Splashing is very enticing. I love this and I want to help her. It's semi erotic too. Yeah. My videos, my photographs and what have you. Okay. Okay. And. Uh oh. So I just want to get that out there. Jesus. Uh oh. That I would really appreciate it if you would tell other people. I will.

Happy to do it. Look at her tiny two feet. About me and help me to grow my social media presence. There's just one. Oh, there's one on the bottom. There's a little, there's one rogue two feet down there. I just want to know. I like her lipstick.

It totally changed the vibe though. Cause she could have just been a normal person and then she gave herself that pop of color. And that whole time, you know, you're like, are we going to see more? That's what I like about it. It kept me on tender hooks. I was like, will we see titties?

Is she going to flash something? Really interesting. It was cool. What's this? What's this handle? It's Denise No, 1957 on Instagram. Can you show us real quick? Do you mind?

Yeah, that's really exciting. I like Denise. This is more interesting than 99% of the celebrity posts that I see on Instagram. Yeah, let's see. Oh, she has 90,000 followers already? Oh, what? Denise. Oh, wow.

She's an author. No. And she's, I thought we were. What's that? I tell you where I usually see photos like that are on some of those documentaries I watch. Your favorites, yeah. Oh, oh, oh, hold on, let's see what else.

I have a whole other color here. Back in the tub. Every horrible thing. Horrible thing. Different lipstick too. But it was a part of the human condition. Possibly back to pre-historical times. Before reading and writing were invented. There was slavery.

Now, in America we have a very strong association between slavery and race and racism. That's true. Is this really appropriate tub talk? Slavery? Slave owners. Yeah. I mean, I was horny and now I'm not. People just didn't have the ability

to go to another continent. And that whole time you just see that one, two just peeking out. So seductive. Can you go to the next one? And that whole time you just see that one You go to the next one I've never seen her out of the bath. I kind of Think it's interesting how words take on meanings different color lipstick and symbolisms That are very much beyond what the word actually I'll tell you is interesting to me, too

Something's not but something is kind of curious here. Yeah, there's 90,000 followers sure no comments 66 likes the math really math as the kids say She's the disabled writer of the bloodied and the broken Justice gone haywire I spy you spy they spy and She's the disabled writer of The Bloodied and the Broken, Justice Gone, Haywire, I Spy, You Spy, They Spy, and Ron at the movies. I'm rand at the movies. Okay. Well, I don't know. Click on the Amazon link,

because that's where you can see her books. Are these self-published or? This is, I don't know. She might be limiting her comments to, I mean, a lot of celebrities, you know do that If they're good point any yeah, that's good point. These books are this is what she writes. That's Denise. Yeah. Yeah Wow, this is I'm thoroughly confused. I'm very confused. I'm very curious, but we did what she asked which is get people These are her books. Is that ones is that free? Is it zero dollars? I spy you spy they spy

Yeah, the audiobook. Yeah, you're right on Kindle. Oh, it's free. Oh, okay. It's got a five five reviews four stars out of five That's not bad. No And ran at the movie and at the movies Wow, that one's got five five out of five stars Look, here's the thing, man. We need to know what's going on with Denise. I just love how she goes to the splashing because it does engage me. And what's going on here?

What's the first medical stuff going on? Your daughter, someone's asking? Again, not a lot of explanation going on. That looks like a workspace. Well, it looks like a crawl space. Well, the other one just looked like people at an office. Sure. And then this other stuff looks like crime scene photos.

Yeah, it just looks like, oh, this is Dennis Rader's garage. Yeah. That's the back of someone's head. It's a really interesting terrifying sketches. Like this as a behavioral profile enthusiast. Sure. You know, if you showed me this at first, I'd be like, oh yeah, this person has committed some horrific crimes. Oh, well.

Oh, then the flowers. She's always in the tub. What's that? What's going on here? Okay now we're in fishnet again With the fish nets on Very beautiful. I love telling you full sexy legs. I Really think about BTK because he was really in Wichita that But may I you know something Tom I see myself going this way what like let's say You die before me you always bring up this scenario. It's always I'm because I can see myself going crazy. Really? Absolutely. I'm the woman in the bathtub just thirst trapping

like just putting it out there. This is this could easily be me and I have ten cats. This can you you can see that's why he's laughing because he's like yeah of course look at her this is me. A lot of engagement here. All of these guys are super into her. That's what I was saying what's going on here. So she's getting dates that's how she does it. Yeah well I'll tell you what those comments are about to change sister Guys are super into her. That's what I was saying. What's going on here? So she's getting dates. That's how she does it. Yeah. Well, I'll tell you what, those comments are about to change, sister.

You're gonna start seeing a lot more stuff that you're gonna be like, what the fuck does this mean? Oh, oh. Knees up, knees up. No, she looks good though. I like her shoes. I'm good.

We can, I'm... Man. Yeah, this is interesting. Thank you for showing I'm. Oh man. Yeah. This is interesting. Thank you for showing me this. Bloodied and broken. Yeah. That's her book. And there's a, there's a goat. She looks really different there too.

You know, ever changing, ever evolving. That's still that toothy right there. And it's very dark lipstick today. Maybe that's the Christina P collection. I hope so. You know, my new color Berlin looks similar to that that there's her friend Jan at the fucking diner that guy right there in the middle it's like he's got a story to tell I don't know what's going on with him um brother and father one of my favorite restaurants it's called Oseo or um Asian fusion and it's in the ball of her well anyway, I'm gonna yeah

We got some some brothers in arms in these comments though, so that some people are I built this brick by brick I don't understand my feet, but I love it so other people are Yeah, what's the German? Why so sick not nine algorithms? Is your dad a WW2 vet? Thanks for the tour. Hope you enjoyed the crispy chicken. Oh, that's from the restaurant. Well, either way, all we know is this is a great find.

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Here we go. This is right. Oh. This reminds me of a. King Asroper, he does have King. Similar physique and process. Big baby. Oh boy. Is he a baby? Yeah, he's doing the big baby thing. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is what Asripper would taunt us with. Yeah. Harry and Graws Thank you, sir. The crazier part is that there's another guy who you can't see who's watching this same video just stroking his dick. You know, being like, God, this is fucking hot. Just loving this.

I will say. Whatever, there's always somebody stroking their dick to it. Of course, that's why he's putting it out there. This isn't for women's benefit. No woman wants to see this shit. Nope. He has the same burp sound that you do. Yeah.

When you. What would it kinda look like? No, no. You put your voice at the end of it. Ah. Yeah. It always gets me. Yeah.

It always makes me laugh. And then your mom gets super. Yeah. It always makes me laugh. And then your mom gets super upset and then it makes me laugh even more when she goes, ah! Yeah. You are disgusting. I like for somebody to answer me, Korean men or Newfoundland men or Canadian men. Somebody contact me to let me know,

would you like to have someone like me? Meow. Oh, I like like to have someone like me? Meow. Oh, I like that at the end. Any? I'm not Canadian, unfortunately. That's true. That's the only thing that's making you say no. That's really, that's it,

cause I mean, look, I'd be into it, but yeah, I just, I'm not from Canada, what can I do? You know, big difference between her and the cool guys is that she put her dentures in to make this video. That is true, it's a terrible angle, it's horrible lighting, the message is upsetting and at the very least confusing, but she does have her teeth in.

Which is. And that's a huge, huge win. It's very rare that they do that. So she put in the effort, she looks clean. Yeah, yeah. Somebody, and again, effort, she looks clean. Yeah, yeah. Somebody, and again, somebody's dick is hard. Yeah. Not yours.

I'll tell you the one that's made me the most, I laughed so hard. I sent this video to 50 people when I got it. Oh. And it's it. Did you send it to me? I don't know if I did. It was a while ago.

I actually forgot about it until I saw it in the bank today. Here it is. What they say I'm trying to, move your head. I'm trying to pronounce it. It's a fuck I'm just hold on. I'm trying to sound it out. You need but you're not sounding the right No, they don't say uncle they say fuck Fuckle with uncle Funko. F-fucko. The shirt for people listening just says Funko, a fun uncle, and his nephew is clearly just messing with him saying it says fuck. He's like no no no no no no no. That's why I said I'm- It don't no no no fuck it don't say nothing. Now you

got me saying it cause I'm getting pissed off. You saying the fucking wrong, saying the fucking wrong. You don't say nothing about no fuck or nothing. They say uncle Funko. Bitch, if you can't get it, if you can't say it, don't say it, don't say it. Don't say that shit, because you're pissing me off. Say something about your damn mouth. Oh shit dude! Right at the end he's like fuck off.

He's got a fist. He's making a fist. He's gonna kill him dude. Holy shit. He got so worked up by that shit man. He knew exactly how to wind his ass up. He knew how to wind his ass up. Do you think it wound him up because he's one of those guys that's like, I don't curse.

I don't do the cursing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, and it's a harmless, and he probably loves this shirt. Yeah, it's his fave. He's like, I'm a funko. And he probably thought that was really endearing. Oh, funko, a fun uncle, I like that shit. And he's like, I'm a funko. And he probably thought that was really endearing. Oh, funko.

A fun uncle. I like that shit. You know? It says, fuck. He's like, do-do-do-do-do-do. Funko. I'm a funko. And the funny thing is, he's definitely not a funko.

No. He's a beat your ass uncle. For sure. For sure, he's got plastic covering the air conditioning. You don't sit on my no-fuck-a-nut. He's so plastic covering the air conditioning unit. It don't sit on my no fucker nothing. He's so mad. Yeah, he's so mad. He's got murder in his eyes. Look. They say uncle Funko.

He does love the shirt because look how worn it is. Oh, he loves it. That's his favorite one. And his fucking, this kid knows exactly what button to press on this guy. It's great. Yeah. Yeah. It's great. Issa, fuck. Yeah, cause he's taking it like, how dare you think I would put on something with cursing on it.

Of course, especially I'm an uncle and you don't wanna say like a fuck uncle. No, of course. That's terrible. He's like, I know that'll piss him off. So I'm just gonna record him losing his shit right now All right, let's um, yeah Good stuff

Uncle uncle, all right, let's take a quick break. We'll be right back Say my name say say my name. Fancy Chef. This is the Beyoncé baby, look how loving, look how nice. 570-604-3868-702-742-1784-516-713-9493. Fuck me! So nice. And beautiful.

Wouldn't you like your Thanksgiving table when I'm like this? Beautiful and nice by me the remarkable Fancy Chef. I'm located in Atlanta, Georgia. Okay, I'm all booked up. Alright? We have to book Fancy Chef. I'm coming Tuesday. I'm coming Tuesday.

And that's gonna change my record. Will he or won't Fancy Chef show up? Will he or won't he? This is the greatest mystery. I'll be honest, I said it. I'm going to Texas. I really like this guy. It's amazing. You'll see how beautiful it'll be. And I'm telling you, the podcast gonna go a lot. I'm doing the filming today, so. You're filming? What are you filming? Johnsonville. No way. Yes way. The actor? Yes.

Good job. Turn this off. They gonna ring like crazy. Don't answer. All right and welcome to another episode of Your Momma's House. Today is a huge, huge day here. We are bringing to you guys live and in person. This is just like a breakthrough type of experience. We've had days, I say, where you mark time. You know, RPC, Charo's famous 9.72 seconds. Of course. And then today, today we are bringing to you guys,

we couldn't be more excited, the one and only Fancy Chef. Give it up everybody. Wow, he's here. Yeah. In the flesh. Yeah, I mean like, we've been watching the videos, we've been obviously like fascinated by this thing.

I have to say, first of all, just so it's clear, we are big, big foodies. In other words, we love fine dining experiences. We love chefs. In my mind, hanging out with chefs is a lot like hanging out with any other artists. I see you guys as artists. So I like hanging out with musicians, painters, comics, et cetera. And chefs are like that for me too. So we always have a natural

Yeah, sure Take that is what do you want to take it? Okay, whatever you want them to take the phones away, yeah, you don't mind I don't mind doing hey Tanner you want to leave him No, it's up to you chef. Whatever you want to do. Do you want to leave him out here? I Don't want you to miss it. If you don't know you you need to grab a call, it's fine. Oh, yeah Okay, I'm gonna answer on set. Oh, it's up. It's sure. Do you do you want to take them out to the prep area? Or do you want to answer on set? You know, I don't mind if you answer on set. Oh, you know, okay Okay, okay

So so anyway, we've been so fascinated, and I know you're gonna do something very special for us. You were giving me a little bit of a teaser out there about today's gonna be like, Chef told me that he felt inspired, and he decided to call an audible, change the menu on the spot, in the moment. And he also said he's gonna do something

he's never done before. What? So we don't really know exactly what it is yet But it's a little bit of a secret. Can you give us any hints like any hints? I could I'm hungry by the way, I came in starving. I haven't had anything to eat today because I knew you were cooking Tell me wet my whistle wet my whistle, wet my beak a little. Give us a little, a little. You sure? Yeah. Just give me like a little. Just a little appetizer. Yeah, just tell me. No? I want the excitement to be there. Well I'm excited either way. But it, but it

is, it's a great mixture that I've never done before okay. It's gonna be the first time But it's not gonna be to the point where you be like no you really gonna scream and shout like this is it This is it. I know how to execute it. I mean I'm ever doing it. I know how to execute it Of course your master your master. I know how to execute it. Trust me now One of the things you said because everybody's interested in people's background You started in the kitchen when you were four I did and did you ever go? I imagine did you work in restaurants growing up? Did you go to culinary school? Did you travel abroad and work in like a lot of chefs have certain paths? What was your path? Mmm

So I'm gonna tell you a real funny story. Okay. But let me go start from the beginning. So I did start at four. I started in the kitchen as a little child with my mom and my dad. My dad was actually a Navy chef in the Navy. My mom actually learned from her parents. So what I would do is at four I would get the pot, get the pan, fill this up with water. She would actually sometimes stand me on the platform

to get to the stove or to the water to fill it up or get the potatoes or something like that. And it never left me from there on. So what I did do is I went abroad as I grew and one of the first places I got into airline catering airline catering like Delta No, they they were they would we did British Airways first class of business class B We first class of British. Okay first class of business class

There was an airline this kitchens in New York. Would you do the thing where you would design the menu for that airline? Like you would you would design design what passengers are gonna have? No, later on. Because when I started, there was a chef there called Russo. And I was young. And Russo, at first, didn't believe in me. So he stuck me in the cold kitchen. So he stuck me in the cold kitchen, he seen my speed. He said, come here. I came to him. I didn't know he was so fast.

I didn't know he was so good. So the hot kitchen is more advanced. Right. So he's tomorrow. You're coming in 6 a.m. He could sense how fast you were. He did. You're going in the hot kitchen. I was excited I ran home and I told my mom and he took me and told me the kitchen stuff I had never seen before really the tall kettles that you cook in and commercial kitchens airline hotels so on and so forth and she said that's good see what learning from home did for you so that was one of my first places that I got the taste of commercial.

And then was it on to restaurants from there or just private cooking? No, it was on to restaurants. I actually had a good friend who was into it, who was in that neighborhood. And this is when I went to Rockefellers Center in New York City to restaurant associates, Savory's, I was talking about Seppi Ringley.

So there was three restaurants in the row they had. Savory's to the left was American Festival Cafe, to the right was the Sea Grill, where Chef Seppi Ringley, I learned up under him as well. I've been to Seppi. Oh, the Sea Grill. But this is interesting because you said to us

on the phone call that you didn't prefer to work with seafood. Is there a history at the seafood restaurant? Well, you gotta tussle with a lot. And the tussle is cracking, opening, so on and so forth. Shell, so on and so forth. But the big thing is the smell. Yeah. Yeah, so that's that's that's a turn off Yeah, so it can be if you ain't in the move for that then

You don't want to do it. Tell me about strawberries because they so clearly have influence you you know Dali was known for clocks in his work, and I feel like when somebody says, Fancy Chef, I go, strawberries. This guy has a thing. He loves strawberries. Like, is there an origin story there, or are you, because I feel like there's a connection

between you and strawberries. It is. And the connection that I have with the strawberries is they have a very distinct smell to them, a great taste, they're very bright, and the contrast that they give off is exceptional. Yeah. Because you'll throw them in things that people don't expect. I do.

You know what I mean? Yeah. I do. That's exciting. Yeah. And the reason why I do it is because sometimes my mom tell me to. Yeah. It's sometimes not playing, but

that's, that's something I've seen from your posts is you have a very stream of consciousness way of cooking. You, you feel something in the moment. It is very artistic, right? It is. Yeah, it really is. It is. So I ask you, are these people that are trying to book you that are contacting you right now on your phones? Like are these bookings? They are.

Wow. Wow. Can you tell us, I mean, I know you've signed many NBAs. Can you tell us one of the most exclusive clients you've worked for? No. No. I could.

I can't tell you who it is though. I know that you- Can you give us a hint maybe? Yeah, can can't tell you what is I know Yeah, take you tell us like what the scenario as was without tagging who are they actors? Are they business people? policy about huh all the above and they they have you at like on yachts and in mansions and everything yeah Wow, uh This guy here isn't really too much I didn't sign it and be with him But he was one of my first ones and I'll tell you his name Daniel Green Daniel Green he he drew for the comic books Marvel. Okay And he had you he had me yet in New York and

the town of Kingston, New York and the town of Kingston, New York He when I when I did he was about 75 mm-hmm There they are Excited yeah And I did good he was just So excited for everything that I did but Daniel Green he was a drawer for the Marvel

Do you remember what he liked to eat what did you cook he didn't care he didn't care that's even trusted your everything I'm a artist as Nate in it with the artistry of it. He was just For people just general suck basically because I don't want people to waste your time Can you tell people What kind of price range I need to be in if they're even looking to book you because chefs come in different levels and tiers of pricing Like what should people be expecting if they're even thinking about reaching out? Like what should people be expecting if they're even thinking about reaching out? You get to think big. Think big.

You get to think that all those investments you made, you get to think about bringing them here. Wow. Because you don't want to eat. Cause you could go to so many different places and do that. McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, White Guy, you could go there and do that. McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, White Guy. You could go there and do that. But when you deal with all the street

and the level of chefs and the level of food. That you're dealing with. Yeah, paying should be like, no problem. Yeah. Okay. So. So if somebody says, hey chef, I'm having eight people, I'd like to do a multi-course dinner.

Are they thinking like, six, like five figures, six figures? Is that reasonable? It is. Actually, there should be no price range. No price range? No, because you gotta think about it. If you want the best, if you want lavish, if you want fabulous and you want fancy,

why would it be? You think about it from this standpoint. No limit. I look at fur coats. I look at clothes, right? Yeah on different levels So a fur coat is has two reasons to two meanings and it's two meanings is Temperature mm-hmm and how you look. Yep. So if you warm if yes It's so funny. I was this close to wearing a fur coat to meet you and I thought that's too hot out So it's only thing about it is you got you got to look at that Yeah, and you say wow and there's different levels of furs there are black llama you have So many different and there's there are pieces and there are whole pieces of furs.

So if you get the pieces, they cost less. If you get the whole, it costs more. But it is fancy. Unlimited is nice, but just so people have like a ballpark. Like they should be prepared to spend 100,000 at least for a good dinner. Why not? Yeah, no, I agree.

No, we're just, yeah. We agree. No, we're just, yeah. Yeah. We agree. You can minimize and you can work with a person. If they're, okay. Normally those people that, because my background in those places, limitless. Well, let's do this right now.

I mean, we're so excited to get this going. Why don't we get you out into the prep area with your sous chef Tanner, and you guys can start prepping. We'll check in with you regularly and then when the meal is ready to go you come back in here and we'll you know we'll do our tasting together. Does that work? It does. Great all right. Wonderful. Awesome. Thank you chef. Thank you Right, we just kind of stepped down there for a second to get chef started How how incredible is this? I mean look it's been a quite a whirlwind week for us here at Y image because we weren't sure he was even gonna show up

It was a lot of anticipation and there was a lot of excitement last night when you got the notification. Yeah. Oh, thank you. The eagle had landed. That the eagle had landed in Austin, thank you. Watch your head. And then the excitement of him going live on Instagram. We were watching in bed.

Yeah, it was incredible. It was incredible. So yeah, this is going to be exciting. What do you anticipate for the meal? I feel like. Looks like we have the first course coming in. Oh wow. Right now.

Already? Jesus. That is. That was so fast. Okay, chef watch your hand. So we're gonna do what we talked about. Okay. Which is one of them.

Okay. Oh wow. One of the dishes is ready to go. One dish is ready to go. Literally what, four minutes? This is one of my favorites. This is one of my favorites. This is one of your favorites. Which is the strawberries.

Strawberries. Yes. Unbelievable plating of strawberries. Gorgeous. You actually want to give a color contrast like using those words. Okay. And brighten the area and brighten it up.

Okay. And also give a great smell. Excellent. That's what we want. These look incredible. They look fresh So we'll go ahead and we'll start with those. Yeah, okay Tom like me to serve you a strawberry. I would love one. I I'm a huge fan of strawberries actually It's gonna go ahead and take this one. Yeah

They've been washed I wonder if it was had anything to do with my mentioning it or I don't know at this point Listen, he came with a plan. That was cheers. Wow first course first course a plate of strawberries They call this an amuse bouche in fine dining well Fancy delicious Beautiful and nice. Yeah, I have no idea how he just did that. That was so fucking good. Wow. Wow. Oh wow. Oh my God, there's so many more.

Yeah. I didn't realize he had prepared so many. Actually this is a really, really sweet delicious. It's a nice strawberry. He's right, it really sets up your palette. Mm, no. You know what's so funny is you do love fine dining. I do.

This is your most favorite genre. And we went, we were in Amsterdam. It's funny, because Heather was gonna ask me what my least favorite meal was. Oops, my mic cut out, Amsterdam it's funny because Heather was gonna ask me what my least favorite meal was oops my mic cut out it's back and it was the fine dining meal we had in Amsterdam I didn't enjoy it either you know I didn't enjoy it either that you really roll the dice on tasting menu style places I mean it means that they're competent at what they do sure But that might not be for your palate and I wasn't a big fan of that either. Well, I'll tell you what I also had a

Tasting menu in Madrid that I didn't enjoy but it was like I don't know No, it's too can I be honest with you and I don't I know we have Danish listeners I wasn't a fan of the Dane food Period. I don't think they're offended. I don't a fan of the Dane food, period. I don't think they're offended. I don't think they're fans of it either. Yeah, they told us, cause I was like, where should we go eat? Yeah, I was like, what's like the nicest

to send us to the best Danish restaurant? And they're like, oh, you don't want to eat that. To be clear about the Madrid experience, I am a huge fan of Spanish food. This wasn't the restaurant style. It was like experimental seafood stuff. And and I just it really wasn't you know as a fan of Anthony Bourdain rest in peace He would always talk about his loathing of when chefs tortured the food. Yeah, I agree I don't want to see anything freeze-dried or essences of don't torture the food just give me but by the way our guy

Yeah, high quality ingredients incredible and One chef told me one time you know who it was Do you remember when we were gonna do naked sushi? Yeah, we were gonna book naked sushi Yes, so I talked naked sushi was like where they have like a model Yes, who's mostly nude and you eat sushi off of her and we were and you have like guests there And it was supposed to be just like the fun I don't know, experience of that all. So I talked to that chef, and I had a tasting thing for him.

I don't know what it was. But anyway, he said this thing I never forget, which is the food is always the star. So you have to get great quality food. And then Fancy Chef brings in these strawberries, and you're like, oh yeah, lesson learned. Definitely. Because anybody could just give, lesson learned. Definitely. Because those aren't just,

anybody could just give you whatever strawberry. He went and picked super high quality ones. Yep, very fancy and very nice. So far, so good. So far, so good. What's your rating, Tom? Oh, right now we're fucking, I guess 12 stars. Isn't that the scale?

Yeah, pretty maze. Let's look at the camera. Just the camera feed is fine. Oh, look at him. Fancy's cooking. Fancy's in there with Chef Tanner. Chef Tanner learning. See, he's handing him a knife.

Okay. Oh, got proper technique. Slicing and dicing. Wow. Yeah, this is exciting. I know. Hold on. Can I tell you something? Yes.

I got a picture of the old lady who reads the dirty book in the waiting room today at radiation. I got a picture of the old lady who reads the dirty book in the waiting room today at radiation. Again, this is like the same lady? This is her. And I was so fucking, I was so stoked because I finally know I can read the tie lights. I took a sneaky pic of her.

I won't post it because this is someone's grandma. Okay, she's almost done with the book. She made a lot of progress since yesterday. The book is called Hidden Secrets Between Them. And it's a very horny cover. I mean, from what I can tell. Anyway, look how far she got. Yeah, I can tell.

She's almost done. She doesn't even look up. Hidden secrets between them. Maybe it's not even horny, but it felt horny to me. Or maybe it's too gays. Yeah, it's totally horny, right? An uplifting inspirational romance. that's what it says. Oh, bullshit, dude.

And by the way, aren't all secrets by definition hidden? I feel like it's redundant to say hidden secrets. These are open secrets between them. Yeah, I don't know. Let's see, can we read a little bit? Yeah, we should be able to. And it's inspirational. There's a little teaser there.

Chef's coming in. Oh, oh, oh, already? Oh my Yeah, we should inspirational teaser there We're already in course two course two that's just so fast Oh my god pricing watch your head watch your head everybody. So I'm gonna do is I'm going to Come here. Yes, sir. I want to do it right before your eyes. Okay Yes, chef, give me a bigger plate. Yes, chef Okay Again, I'm gonna have this. Yes, chef. Give me a bigger plate. Yes, chef. Okay. Again, I always talk about color, color. Oh shoot.

That's all right. That's okay, it happens. You pulled up page in, Jean, before it goes off the side. Oh, yes. Can we soak that up? Sorry about that, right? What happened, chef? It spilled over.

Tanner, you weren't fucking here. That's what happened. I'm sorry. This definitely goes on you, Tanner. Yeah, dude. You're supposed to be next to him helping him. Tanner, you weren't fucking here. That's what happened. I'm sorry. This definitely goes on you, Tanner. Yeah, dude. You're supposed to be next to him helping him. Sorry, Chef.

Okay, good. Good job. You can just take the paper, Tanner. Are we filming? Yes, Chef. We are filming. Okay, good. So what we're going to do is go color contrast.

We're going to go Italian. Okay, color contrast. We're going to go Italian. All right. We're already at we should mention We're by the way, the strawberries were unbelievable. So good. So now we are on the second course or it looks like we have some burrata Okay, and some tomatoes. Yes

So you're going tomato cheese tomato cheese So you're going tomato cheese tomato cheese Okay, I like that. Okay. Okay. So the key point here is you want to go metal Yeah, walk us through your thinking right now Excitement Overjoyed So we go in middle. Yeah spread out spread out. Oh Let me have all good job Tanner. Yeah

Okay, we're gonna go here some balsamic here. Wow Beautiful look at the drizzle technique. Yeah Let me have the olive oil. Yes, chef. Olive oil, right here. Good, so we'll go olive oil. Oh wow, oh wow, that's a generous. I know. Yes. I know, actually one of the spot.

Oh yeah. Okay, good. Cause I like olive oil too. So do I, and it's good for you Tom. So it's even in this, okay. It's even out. Yes. You've got to know tricks.

That's good, you got to know tricks. Wow. Okay, look, so now we're gonna put the finishing touches Finish it touches. Is that the base the base? and again generous size Basel yes, I love basil too. He knows that yeah. Yeah. Yes. All right. I like that Not too much. You don't want to overshadow the dish.

It's important to also point out some of your intuitive nature, because we didn't even fill out a preference sheet. You're doing this without us having relayed to you what some of our favorites are, and right out of the gate, there's two in a row. It's incredible. Beautiful, I like it.

Okay. Great. Second dish, ready to go. All right Very good second course Tom. I'll let him try it because he's the Tom is the discerning palette of the two of us Wow, thank you. I appreciate that. I am like a trash dog with my palette. Yeah, sure. You are refined Wow, that looks gorgeous Really nice. Yeah, everything good with you Prepping for that. Okay. Good. Okay. Great. You ready? Yes. Thank you chef. We look forward to the next one. No problem

Yeah, this is exciting. This is really exciting. Very exciting also interesting bit of information Zolo is That nothing has been done to start hot food is what I was just told. Oh really? That's just an interesting choice I think. You know, he's timing it out though. He's a master. A generous helping of basil.

It is. A generous amount of olive oil. And he plated it lovely. It is beautifully plated. Yeah, this is incredible. Yeah, the plating is lovely. He put a ton of basil on there. Why are you scooping it on? I'm moving it to see what else I can,

there was such a large piece that I couldn't see what was underneath it. Yeah, it's like a basil salad with some tomato and mozzarella. I love it, I love it. Look at them, they're working away. They're onto the next dish. Do you wanna know what I noticed, however?

Yes. I didn't see him season it. I didn't see salt and pepper. Which I'm a fan of, salt and pepper. Of course, a lot of people are. But I also have to think there's a reason for that. That's what I'm saying. Chef's not gonna do anything

without having a pretty good reason for it. Of course. So here we go. I'll slice it in two, because we're each gonna have a bite. Okay. This is very exciting. Wow. So much oil too. I like that. You know, olive oil, very healthy. The Mediterranean diet is supposed to be the most healthful.

Wow. It's just absolutely just swimming in oil. It's incredible. I think I'll let you be the taster. I think you're going to, we're, no, we're both going to take bites. I'm good. We're taking bites. Well. Wow. Juicy.

You can taste the oil. What about that basil? You can taste that too. Here you go. Here's your bite. No, no, no, I'm good. I believe you. You need to try it. It's very juicy. Yeah, you need to try it. There's oil on my jacket already. You know what?

It's $45,000. You're taking a bite. Fair enough. Well, that is the. I know you love your basil. Yeah. There we go. Let's see.

I cut you into a quarter there. Look, it dripped. It just dripped on my thumb. I'm going to try it. I'm going to try it. I'm going to try it. I'm going to try it. I'm going to try it. I'm going to try it. I'm going to try it. I'm going to try it. I know you love your basil. There we go.

Let's see. I cut it into a quarter there. It just dripped on my thumb. It's dripping on the table. It's very oily and juicy. I like that. Very fancy, very nice. There's oil all over the table, there's oil on my jacket.

Another home run, well done, chef. That's very oily. But beautifully plated. Absolutely. And what a thrill to watch him work. To see it happening in the moment, yeah, it really is something. You don't get that at fine dining.

You know what it reminds me of, probably a little bit of? It's kind of like somebody invited you over to Prince's house. Yeah. And they're like, oh, he's just teetering on the guitar today. And you're like, what? And then you just get to like,

you hear a couple notes getting like strummed, you know, like ding, dong, dong. And you're like, oh, I'll just hang back. And then an hour later, he's like, I just wrote a new song. You're right there. It's kind of like- This is just the beginning. I know. And then an hour later, he's like, I just wrote a new song, you're right there. It's kind of like. This is just the beginning. I know.

And he hasn't even started cooking the hot stuff yet. Now, let's go back to my horny novel because I am so interested. I don't think it's a horny, okay, but let's look at the pages. Do we have page selections in there? Hidden secrets between them. Christian book distributors.

I know, but it's supposed to be horny. Okay, he never meant to be a father. Let's see here. I was hoping it was horner than this. I mean, it is. Okay. Isn't, are those images there at one of them a page? Yeah.

Okay. All right, Tom. You have to tell him. You have to tell him. standing in the kitchen of the house She just signed a six-month lease on Kristen Reynolds side. I know mom It was all she thought about since dr. Olsen gave her the good news that despite their concerns of her being a single mother She'd convinced them. She was the right person to run the urgent care center Open in Hope Cres in Hope Crossing, Texas.

As a nurse practitioner, the movie was a dream. This is so boring. This was your fucking choice. I know, but I wish it was hornier. I'm just saying, I can't imagine people read this stuff. I mean, you saw the lady who was reading it. I know, I was hoping it was better. Do you even read fiction?

I feel like I can't stand fiction. I can't stand descriptions. I can't stand descriptions. It's not my favorite. It's not my favorite either. Let me play you an opening clip I've been wanting to share with you for a while. Well, I'm disappointed that that wasn't hornier. It's okay. In my mind.

I know, it's a bummer. I know, it would've been awesome if it was like, the pussy juice was dripping down her lip. Yeah. I know. That would've been nice. I did talk to a deaf woman today in the waiting room. That's cool. And that was cool. I could tell she was reading my lips and stuff.

And I was like, what's up? Shit's happening. You should bring that lady one of our books, one of the Kwan Mills novels or something. I noticed you were reading a book last week. I brought you another one. That's a really good idea. No, I will.

You wanna talk shit, you fucking losers? What's up? I'm here on the beach. What the fuck is up? Wow. That was cool, huh? I like that a lot. Look at him just in there working away. I wonder what he's prepping for the third course.

Do we know if there's dessert today? I'd hope so. We're paying him. Oh, cause I'm, you know, I'm, uh, I kind of practice and, and, and set it out so that I would have a cheat meal. Oh, perfect. Yeah. Yeah.

We got dessert. Okay. I've been really restrictive, you know, and I was like, well, if you're going to get off the health train, you want it to be worth it? Of course. It's going to be, babe. No, that's what I'm saying.

I was like, did he bring dessert? Yeah. So wait, what's this guy? I don't understand where the blood is coming from and I'm not sure. What the fuck is up? I'm not convinced it's real, the blood. I think it's very real. You think so?

Yes. It's kind of really bright and perfectly placed. I think it's real real. You think so. Yes, it's kind of really bright It's real. Do you want to talk shit you fucking losers? What's up? Hmm. Oh, I also got a notification from my black friend. Uh-huh. She texted me this morning and she goes She goes I lost my glasses She goes, I lost my glasses. Black people don't use vinegar to clean a chicken, damn it. Have that chef make a black Thanksgiving.

That would be hilarious. Really? Yeah. She's like, black people don't do that. I guess I said that or someone must have said that. Like, is this a black person thing? It's no, it's not, is what I'm trying to tell you. I have heard wash your chicken

in the black community before. Oh, okay. Maybe not with vinegar, but I've had heard the wash thing black community before. Oh okay. Maybe not with vinegar but I have had her the wash thing for sure before. Got you. Have you any? Sorry I just got back in you said washing chicken? Yeah have you heard that as a culturally black thing before? I don't know if it's a culturally black thing. I mean I mean yeah washing shit is probably good right? Yeah but with vinegar. I don't know if I would do it with that. Okay, I don't know if I'll do that. Okay. Yeah, I'll do it with a with a toothbrush and Particularly the tongue scraper part. I don't know if I'll do that. But um, yeah, I might wash it though. Okay

I mean, you know, just making sure just trying to learn you know Anyways anyway We've been watching the Menendez Brothers show on Netflix. I forgot how cool those guys were, yeah. I know, I forgot too, because that happened when I was young. 89. Yeah. I can't believe it, because I don't know,

it feels to my memory like, oh, I don't know, somewhere in the 90s. Yeah, me too. Maybe it's because the trial was later, right? That's probably why. Yeah, when is the Menendez trial? Because I remember that going on and on and my parents watching it every night.

Yeah, that's right. And I know they killed their parents. Oh, 93, so that's why. July 20, 93 it starts. So it's four years after the murders. Yeah, so that's why it felt like it took place. Yeah, and funny too now, the way they make this show is they're making it sympathetic to the brothers, you know?

Which is such a 2024 thing to do. I don't think they're trying to make it sympathetic to the brothers. I think they are. I think they're making it out. How do you gather that? Well, they're just like setting up the parents to be shit turds, you know? Yeah, but it's still showing it as pretty much,

pretty clearly first degree premeditated murder. Yeah, that's true. I don't think it's sympathetic to them. I do think they're fucking, like, probably fun guys though. Of course they're fun guys. Yeah, like you watch it and you're like, I like these guys, you know? They're nice guys.

Couple of cool kids, and of course the whole time we're like, oh no, is that Ellis and Julian? That hair piece thing is wild. Oh yeah, everybody's like, these are your sons. Is this my kid? Is my kid gonna fucking do this? Yeah, they look like new kids on the block sitting down there.

So he's got his hair piece on, which I think is amazing. Yeah, oh yeah, isn't that crazy? Look how different he looks. Yeah, hair really does. I'm gonna have to Yeah. Oh yeah. Isn't that crazy? Look how different he looks. Yeah. Hair really does. He has some with the hair on. I have wigs coming up in this show. Oh cool. For different things. It totally changes.

It changes you so dramatically. Hair is everything. I know. Yeah. It's wild, dude. Yeah. I tried to watch a murder show that you recommended. Yeah, so I get the best text. I would say the best text you've ever sent me.

Wow. And you said, I'm ready to get into murder shows. best text, I would say the best text you've ever sent me. Wow. And you said, I'm ready to get into murder shows. I mean, I literally stopped what I was doing and I was like, I've been waiting fucking 20 years for this text. I get so excited, you go, give it to me. Give it to me, Mark. Give it to me, Mark.

Give it to me. I'll watch whatever you wanna watch. And I'm like, I'm in Florida, and I go, I kinda run through my Rolodex of dead bodies and I go, ah, I got one for you. Why don't you check out, because it's fantastically done, American Nightmare, which came out, I don't know, six, nine months ago,

whatever, and I go, how was it? You go, I lasted five minutes. I think I should have been more pacific in that I don't like cute little 20 year old girls getting murdered in their apartments. That's what that one was. She wasn't murdered. Too close. She wasn't murdered.

I like serial killer-y. I think that's the difference is I want to know about dark souls. Like I like the Menendez brothers. I'm actually really on board with that. Okay. Because I could put myself in their position where you're like, I kind of Menendez brothers. I'm actually really on board with that. Because I could put myself in their position where you're like, oh, I kind of hated my parents too. When I kill them. So you wanna watch a serial killer doc? Yes, but that's why I like the Menendez brothers.

Like I'm saying like- Well that's not a serial killer doc. No, no, but they're killers and they're dudes and the people they kill, you're like, oh, I could see that. I could see how you could do that as a young person too. So you want this victim accountability as in your decision making here? Maybe, a little bit.

Wait, I mean, couldn't you see yourself kind of possibly doing it at their age? Well, everybody entertains that. They're mad at your parents. I hate my parents. Taking it to that, where they did is obviously, other level. You know, while we're doing this,

why don't we just take a moment here. Can we check in with Fancy Chef and Chef Tanner? I don't know if he'll be able to hear the ringing with the cacophony of other beeps and rings. Okay, let's see. The rest of the soap, when that start boiling. See if Tanner answers. Oh, he's reaching in his pocket.

Behind the soap. Oh, he just put it away. So when I start boiling Oh He just put it away Guys I just and now he just ran away. I love this. Okay, this is excellent right here. I really love this Yes, we want them to answer yeah What does he think is his mom calling? I didn't need the oil. I didn't need the oil. What the fuck, dude? I don't want to saturate it too much and change the flavor in it. That's not something I want. Are we good? Okay. Tanner's a strange one. Strange bird that kid.

I have your salt, Chef. Here we go. We're back. Salt once this boils. Yes, Chef. Okay. Tanner, what's going on? We have a live feed. We're watching you guys cook. Tell, what's going on we have a live feed we're watching you guys cook tell me what's going on right now So right now we're cooking prosciutto. Okay, getting it. We are we're starting to pursue the chef Yes, she says we're shots sauteing the prosciutto getting it nice and crispy. We got to get it crispy. Yes, chef Okay, and then we are boiling water chef, right?

For the pasta, okay I'm gonna go grab the pasta now. Okay, I'll let you go. I'll let you go. I'll call back later Wow, he's very he's really like he's in the heat Exciting there's a lot going on. How many plates we have got boiling water. We've got a chef. He's rubbing his hands He knows he's doing something Oh flipping stuff. He's definitely done that before Curious to see where Where did Tanner go?

Not sure but Tanner's grabbing the pasta inside. He's got to do what chef, you know tells him to do So wait, I can show you I can give you Serial killer Docs. Yeah, I'd like that but you just you want to know what I like Do you know what I really like profile was first? No, no what I think now I think about it why I like the Menendez brothers is that it's something I could see myself doing I actually like the ones that I'm more relatable to, like husband murders, are there a lot of those? I like to see that, like where he's snoring and snoring and then she stabs him to death or something like that.

Or. Hmm. So it's important to note that the Menendez Brothers one you're watching currently is a scripted one. There's a doc that has just come out. I'd like that one. That I would like you to watch. The docs are, that's where the good stuff is. There's a doc that I like that one. I would like you to watch the docs are That's where the good stuff is. Yeah, that's when you really get

the true insight when you get the real images and the real audio and I'll have a few of those on deck for you. Okay, if you're down I can't watch them alone. Okay, I'll watch them with you. I'll watch them 50 times again. They're so fucking entertaining. So fun. I watched. And then when they end I go. Night night.

Good night. I watched Blink twice. Blink twice? With Channing Tatum. Yeah. Cause I heard on TikTok that that's what P Diddy's parties were kind of like and what it's like to be sex trafficked.

So Tatum plays a Diddy-like character? Mm-hmm. That's pretty wild. It's a good movie. Kind of a goofball? Kind of a, yeah, kind of a guy, a weird guy doing weird stuff. It was a great movie. Really good, huh?

Because you're like, how do you get sex trafficked? How does that happen? It's not like you just get snatched from the airport. Yeah. It's a slow seduction. A hundred. I mean, then spoiler alert guys, but this is just like the ABCs of sex trafficking. I think I'm in a sex trafficking wormhole. Vortex, like I'm really interested in it now.

Yeah. So like, yeah, they, they're kind of, they're courted and they're seduced. And then given drugs. You know? And then you just are like, you don't remember stuff. Stuff happens. And you start kind of slipping. Oh, and Zoe directed and she's dating Channing. So that's what she did.

That's cute. She directed her own, her boyfriend. Her boo boo. That's a hot couple. She's too good looking. Yeah. Yeah, cause like, you know, us moms are always worried about getting snatched in the airport.

That's not how it happens. It's a slow seduction. You just trust a dude. And that's what, uh, diddle did. That's right. Diddle would have these parties and probably make big promises and then drugs for sure. Lots of lube. We know that dildos. Yeah. And then all of a sudden you're like, I guess I could fit three in there. Did he three and you do it. But that's why I like, I like this kind of stuff cuz you're like, wow, could I sex traffic? Like could you be sex trafficked? Could I a could I be sad and absolutely yes

like if they so if Channing Tatum had caught me at like 18 or 19 just dumb as shit and like Mesmerized by his fame and you're like, huh? and then he's like, do you wanna go to this island? Like, yeah, fly private, what? Like, of course. But then you think, could I be the one doing the traffic gang? Like, could it be a violent psychopath? And like, yeah, I feel like we're all able.

You think you're capable of that? I don't know. You put some drugs in me, some ketamine. That you could be the trafficer. The dark side of you is like, okay, kind of. See the allure, like the darkness, you know? Yeah. I don't know, doesn't everybody have that?

Don't you feel like it's hard to not embrace? That's what I'm saying. Like, why do some people, like I choose not to do that, obviously, but like what's in some people that they're like, that's okay, I'll just follow these. But they embrace it, they lean okay, I'll just follow these. They embrace it, they lean in. Everybody has darkness in them.

And then some people go, I don't wanna let, I'm not gonna embrace it. Some people go, I'm gonna lean into it. So what is that? What's the difference in- That's the human experience. What are you talking about? I know, I guess that's why I like it.

Cause like any, you could do it. We're all capable, but we just make a conscious choice. I mean, everything you know, stealing and killing is all, it's like darkness within people, yeah. I know. And you either resist it or you embrace it. I know. It's good and evil. Because when I was, you know, when you're young and a teenager, you start to dabble in the darkness.

You're like, can I steal? And I remember I stole lemon heads, a box of lemon heads from Michael's or Spencer's. You get a rush. And I got caught, the guy caught me. Yeah. And he's like, you wanna put that back? And I was like, am I arrested?

And he's like, just put it back. And I was like, okay, that was a sign from God, I'm not meant to steal. And what, how old were you? 13. Yeah. So that was like, okay, stealing's done. Good age to learn it.

Yeah. But yeah. Good age to learn it, check this out. Sure. Oh, oh, Good age to learn it. Check this out. Sure. Oh, oh, oh, very bumpy road. Ugh, that made me feel gross. Sex trafficking, yeah.

She would love to get ass trafficked. You think so? Oh yeah, I love this lane. So, do you like this bikini? Yes, all right. I've been looking for this for two days. I have so many clothes because I have a couple of YouTube channels that I model clothing on.

And I wanted to model this the other day and I couldn't find it. I did find it, but now I'm missing a dress. What do you think? Let me know. Let me know. So thirsty. I appreciate you do you think? Let me know. Let me know. So she's so thirsty. I appreciate you.

So thirsty, let me know. I appreciate you. She's sweet. She's got them black lady bus driver tits. Big old bus driver tits. Those are the kind I had, those are my tits. And every time I see a lady with big old slops like that, I'm like, I hope she's getting an MRI, breast MRI.

I had a six inch cancer dick in one of mine. And I had black lady bus driver tits, big ones. Not anymore. Those black bus drivers do have big tits. They do, what is that? I don't know, it's part of the requirement. That and like the black ladies that work at the DMV always had big tits too.

Yes, and cafeteria, yeah. Always. I think it's part of the interview, they're like, how big are your tits? Do you have triple Gs? And they're like, yeah. And they're like, you can come in, yeah. You can work.

You can work for the transit system. Unbelievable. Oh geez, I don't think so. What do you think of this lady? I do like they were doing women though. I hate this. Yeah. I hate her highlights. They're wrong. They're bad. You know that's so like 98. I hate a lot of it. I know. I didn't like that. Yeah. Oh Tanner looks like he's rushing to grab the broom. Something broke maybe. Well happens, you know, that's burn this floor. I'll put it on this cloth right here

Okay, oh No, I mean kitchens are messy. You can't get mad about that. You know, you can't get mad about that if Here's nothing of cool women. Did you know that the same god that made that? Made you too? Yeah, I'm really digging these Christian talks. Yeah. Yeah, they get so so pumped over Jesus. They really love it, man. I also feel like this lady right here who's so into Jesus, it like I really love it, man. I also feel like this lady right here who's so into Jesus that like, kind of crazy to me that she's so tatted up. I just don't usually think of the two together.

Yeah, they're usually nerds. And she's young. No, she must've found Jesus after the tats, is what I'm thinking. She led a fun life and then was like, I better rein this in. I gotta clean this up. And that's when you find J.C.

Yeah, I love when they get so pumped over the Lord. But could you imagine feeling that much joy for your savior in Christ? I mean, it's gotta be great. If you could, yeah, if it's in you. To feel that? I know, it's only Christians though. You never see Muslims do this.

So true. Never see Jewish people do this. Only people, well, probably because Christ is the only real Lord. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, yeah smoted smited. Yeah. No, this is this is fucking amazing I wish I had this joy out there just oh you're looking I'll go grab it Oh what the bags of seafood are out in the Sun, huh? He's got he's got a run back and forth to Wonder which seafood he's gonna start with no, no, he's checking out his equipment right now is seasoning basil chef chef

Huh, I'm just I'm elated let me um You know what I realize putting basil on tomatoes, that's are we not past that? He's he's basaling tomatoes This was 20 minutes ago. We left Look at you don't question the process. That's something I've learned. I know I cook fast, you know, yeah Well, this is much faster. I'm not a Michelin star dude, I get it I get it, so I feel like I'm actually a fan of poetry. Really?

Yeah, but it's like. I hate it. I think you kind of do like it if it's presented the right way. In other words, you know, someone doing like slam poetry. I hate it. You want to die, right? And then, I don't know, some of the older traditional poems, I just get, I'm not...

I don't understand it. I gotta be honest. Some modern day, like, takes on poetry, I do get emotional with, and I do enjoy them. So I pulled one for you. Oh, thank you. Let me lick it, let me lick it, let me lick it, lick it, lick it, lick it, lick it, please. Let me lick it, let me lick it, let me lick it, lick it, lick it, lick it, please. Lick, lick, lick all night long. Lick, lick, lick down to the bone.

Lick, lick, lick, lick it to it dry. Lick, lick, lick. Yah, yah, yah. Lick, lick, lick, no mm. Lick, lick, lick, no mm. Lick it in the bed, lick it on the floor. Make sure you make it to the big old. Lick it slow, lick it in the bed. They get on the floor Make sure you make it to the big old they get slow. Look at fast. They can lick it slow I can't throw up. They can slow look at fast. I can't spank space That was awesome, what do you think I hate it. Why do you hate it? I hate these I just

You don't you don't want it to be like You don't want to be like slow or fast. Oh stop. I don't want to make it slow. I get fast Tom look I don't want to lick it to the bone that part really like Like it's gonna lick the meat off, you know what I mean? I don't like that. Cake next, I don't like it. Okay.

You're so hard to fucking. I hate these guys. Well, today is a food-centric episode, so I thought that you might enjoy stepping into the food space. You drink red wine, as you know, pepperoni's really greasy. And I love pepperoni. I don't like pizza as you know, pepperoni is really greasy. And I love pepperoni.

Yeah. I like pizza, but I love pepperoni. So what I do is I take pepperoni. I chew it up really well. Yeah. I get the juices and grease in my mouth. Both sides of my cheeks. Sure.

That sounds lovely. Then I sip my red wine. Plenty of ice. Ice and the red wine. Ah. Way around my mouth. Ugh. A lot of feeling the grease come out of my cheeks and down my throat.

Excellent way to drink wine, learn how to drink wine. Get the greases out of your palate down your throat. What do you think of- That was vile. Of pairing up Fancy Chef with Fancy sommelier trucks here. I would love that. And having, because wine pairings are really fun to do. See the thing is sometimes you go to these restaurants

and they go, would you like a wine pairing? And you're like, eh, I'm not, I don't really care. But then you get somebody who's really like, really well informed and it changes the whole experience. No, I know. And pepperoni. You go, what the fuck was this? You can't even believe how good it is. But most sommeliers don't pair pepperoni.

They're afraid to. Okay, and most chefs don't bring out strawberries as a first course. Most people don't just eat a plate of pepperoni on its own. That's very bold. Bet you're not a sommelier, are you? Looks like they're headed in with the next course. Holy shit. Oh, I'm ready. I'm starving, Marvin.

Wow. Wow. Wow, wow. This is exciting. I hope it's a plate of pepperoni. I hope it's a plate of pepperoni. I'm really ready for a plate of pep. Nobody eats a plate, even like, no, my dad wouldn't even eat a plate of pep. Yeah.

And he's pretty hardcore. Pretty hardcore. With plates of salami and shit. Third course. Oh shit, plate hit the door. Yeah, and he's pretty hardcore pretty hard core plates of salami and shit third course Shit plate hit the door Okay, oh Wow Watch your shoulder chef, okay

That's holy This looks stunning all right Beautiful and nice beautiful Beautiful and nice. What are we looking at here, Chef? So what I had the honor to use is a good fancy mozzarella cheese. The starter dish is you're not going to believe it. It's a wake-up. So I used prosciutto, mozzarella cheese, tomato.

I buttered it, some olive oil, salt and pepper. Unbelievable. But the star of the show is this. That's gonna give the pop. It's the fresh oregano. The fresh oregano, okay. That's what it is. So when you use fresh ingredients,

it changes everything. Everything. Can, bottle, it's not the same. But fresh, grown fresh, nice and beautiful. Amazing. I can't wait to try this. But what are you waiting for? Yeah, what are we waiting for?

Tom, you're the first. Sure. You do the honors, of course. Let's see here. This looks amazing. Incredible. I'll just watch your face. Okay. I mean, I should also say the presentation is extraordinary.

Stunning. Ooh, listen to that crunch. Great crunch. Wow. Yeah, that's the design to do that, because I'll tell you the truth. So with the layers of the liquidation, which would be the butter and the olive oil,

you need something to hold it. And the crunch and the toasting is what holds it. Very impressive, Chef, very impressive. Good, man. Yeah. Good, okay. I love them. I got two more.

I got this beautiful pasta that I'm gonna do amazing. You're gonna love, all right? Yes, sir, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Watch your head, watch your head, watch your head. Oh, shoot, still though. Yep, there goes.

Oh, there you go. Yeah, most people don't cook Yep. There goes. Oh, there you go. Most people don't cook Peugeot. Is he okay? Yeah, he's okay. I also wanna say, by the way, to all you kudos on preparing for today, making this all happen. You guys did a great job. And you all look very nice.

You made it very fancy. We did our best. You guys look very fancy. You look very good. You made it very fancy. Thank you. We did our best. You guys look very fancy. You look very good. You've noticed that, right? The staff is all... No, guys, look, everybody looks amazing. Thank you, guys. Now, what's interesting about this, a lot of chefs don't cook the prosciutto.

Also, feel free to come and try some if you'd like. Try it. It's a different taste when it's cooked up. I mean, I don't want to be... Do you think I'm selfish enough? I'm going to eat this all? I'll try some. Come and try it. it's cooked up. I mean, I don't want to be do you think I'm selfish enough I'm gonna eat this all I'll try something come and try it And treat yourself to a strawberry if you care to Yeah, go ahead and try it yeah pick a strawberry You know, I'm a little disappointed so far. We haven't seen any presentations in the glasses. The meal's not over.

I wanna see meat in a glass. Some ranch. I do too. Well, so far I'm very impressed. Me too. Worth every penny. How much did we spend? I'd rather not make it public if you don't mind. Me too. Worth every penny. How much did we spend? I'd rather not make it public if you don't mind. Fair enough. Fair enough. It's worth every penny though.

Every penny of this Italian feast. So far pretty much the first course was very similar. Put it this way, you could either have had the meal you're having today or done a trip with SpaceX to go to the outing. Oh wow. Yeah, to visit space. But yeah, we have tomato mozzarella salad and then now tomato and cheese on the bread. On the bread. With a little crispy prosciutto, which is different.

It's good. I like it. So far so good. Again, it's very like unexpected. Sure. I like good. It's a again. It's very like Unexpected sure like that All right, so we're talking about the pepperoni Hello pepperoni he looks like a pepperoni grease come out of my cheeks. He looks exactly like a pepperoni It looks like a pepperoni stick is eating slices of pepperoni Yeah, he really does.

He's very, very, that's not good for you. Pepperoni is, pepperoni, it might be the worst thing you could put into your body. But he's happy. Yeah, he's eating pep. It's the worst sound. That's how you enjoy wine. Get the fat from the pepperoni in your cheeks and then swish it around. The grease washes down.

It's a good introduction to wine. Good introduction to wine. Wash the grease down your throat. God damn. Do you have any questions for me? Can I fall real quick? It's a free country dude. It's a free country dude.

That's a kid who was trying to steal like you were at 13. Yeah. Yeah. Dang. Pretty cool. Yeah. Isn't that cool? Yeah.

I would not have the audacity to ask to fart though, to a security guy. That's pretty wild. No, I would not do that. I think he knew that that cop was pretty forgiving. Did you ever steal? Bullshit, you know, like little items. Yeah, did you ever get caught?

No, I don't think I ever got, no, I never got caught. But it wasn't for me, I wasn't. Well, who are you stealing for, your gang? Yeah, some of my brothers in arms, yeah. Yeah, chicks? I mean, who are you stealing for? No, it was like the thrill of being a young teen, like that kind of thing.

I thought you meant there was a reason. No, I just was like, that of being a young teen. Oh, oh. Like that kind of thing. I thought you meant there was a reason. No, I just was like, that same reason where you're like, can I do this? And you do it on a small level and you're like, I don't want to do this. Yeah, it doesn't feel good enough. I feel too guilty.

Yeah, nothing significant. Okay. Jack squared your least favorite trans autistic couple. In the last video, I said I was Jax one and they were Jax1 and they were JaxA but a bunch of you wondered well how can you have the same names. First of all we both have J dead names I was J when I met them and they were Jax when they met me and I go hold the fuck up that's the coolest name I've

ever heard. Would it be weird if I started going by Jax2? And they let me know in less words that no it wouldn't be weird if we were called the same thing it's actually a lot easier to refer to us that way we'll change it up every now and then just to make sure that you fucking weirdos out there don't think that there's some sort of power dynamic no I call myself one and then a or them one and me too there's no power dynamic he's a 30 something year old man and she's 19. Yeah, I hope You fucking weirdos. Yeah, you fucking weirdos out there They don't get it. Jack's one and Jack's a mm-hmm

Yeah, it couldn't be any stranger Can't get on board with this stupid shit I know so just so I understand because I'm just I'm tangling with anticipation Are we doing main course and dessert? I believe so. That's what it looks like. I want to get confirmation Okay, let me see here Okay Okay. Wow, look at Tanner just fucking working his ass off. Hello?

Hi, Chef Tanner. I'm just curious for the two remaining courses. Is it a main course and a dessert? Is that what we have left? Chef, are the two remaining courses a dessert and a main course? Yes, chef says yes. So main course is next.

Main course is next, chef? Yes. Can't wait, just wanted to know, thanks so much. Are you learning out there? I'm learning so much. I learned about shrimp and scallops. We learned about diced tomatoes. It's amazing.

We broke pepper, but that's okay that's fine okay yeah thanks thanks Tanner Wow to my eyes I feel like I see more tomatoes and more basil that Tanner's holding also looks like fancy chef is maybe on a business call right now. Okay, I have more tomatoes and cheese, but I need this plate for the scallops. Isn't that wild? Yeah, this is going nowhere. He's literally building more tomatoes and cheese. We've been with him, by the way, since before we started rolling today. His phone does not stop.

It does not stop ringing, dinging, buzzing, just doing anything to let him know that he is wanted, he is desired. He literally walked in and it rang. He walked in and he was like, hello, fancy. And they were like, hey, I wanna do a thing December 1st. Then he tried to, he was like, where? They told him and he goes, that doesn't exist. And then they confirmed that it does. And he was like, oh, now you're right.

But it was funny. Yeah, it was fucking crazy. Do you remember where the place was? Yes, the Hilton by the airport in Queens, New York And he was like, oh yes by the Burger King I know what's up with that Just watching him work, you know, I like watching him work. Oh I do too Well, he's talking on his phone right now and Tanner's working, but I do like it when he works Yeah, but high-level chefs do this they they just sit on the sidelines and they tell their sous chefs what to do. You know what I mean?

I guess. Not I guess. Is that true? Not I guess. Sorry. When I worked in food service, chefs working just as hard as sous chef. Everyone's working hard.

Here's the thing that you're not fucking understanding here. That it's fine to educate you, is that you're dealing with a different level of understanding here. That I, it's fine to educate you, is that you're dealing with a different level of chef here. Like, yeah, they can get involved if they feel like it. But with somebody, once you've kind of reached a certain tier as a chef, you just go, hey, you guys do this, and you supervise,

and you jump in when they fuck up, which today he's clearly having to jump in probably more than he wants to because I don't think Tanner is you know that Experience but don't you dare say that this guy is not I'm just I'm just I just know what I've seen in kitchens when I've worked in restaurants And I've never seen this dynamic where the chef just takes phone calls. Yeah, they usually it's very hot very frantic Again getting burned again. You're talking about mid-level chefs. They're wearing clogs. Hey, there's tears to this shit.

There's tears to this shit. All right. You know, in college there's division one, two, and three. Hey, you're right, babe, I'm sorry. They only air the big time games, and those are D1. And that's what you're dealing with here. What's Tanner doing? He's pushing on, oh he's drawing off the shrimp.

He's not doing enough. I'll tell you that. Not doing enough. Wow. He is, I do like that he is- More layer, Chef. That's the right guy to be working. Press it down and make sure you get that-

A lot of sweat in that hat too. There's a lot of sweat. A lot of sweat. And Chef is telling him exactly what to do. That's right, you're gonna change this. I like this. Press that down, you There's a lot of sweat. The chef is telling him exactly what to do. I like this. Yeah, I don't think his vision is great. I think you're right. I saw him hit a couple walls. Yeah. It's not he's uh, we've been right in front of him trying to hand him stuff at the store and he just cannot.

I thought it was a debt perception thing, but It's just it's a vision issue. Okay. All right We gotta get him and Potter together Just to see you know where it goes Imagine if we got that gave them a cooking show Fancy Potter like to eat He eats like a bird. I've been on the road with him and you're like, you know, he's like, uh, like he'll skip

and then have a few bites of something. He's like one of those guys. Yeah. It's not a big time. He's not really into eating. So funny. I know. I'm so into eating.

Not an indulger, not a glutton. If I remember right in the LA studio, all he would eat was soup. That was his lunch every year. Oh yeah. Yeah, a lot of pho. Soup. A lot of pho. And he'd be like mad about it. He's like, fuck, all he would eat was soup. That was his lunch every year. Oh yeah. A lot of pho. A lot of pho. And he'd be like mad about it.

He's like, fuck, I have to eat. Every time, you know, cause that's the thing for me on the road is like, you know, you're away from home, you get excited about, I guess where we're going tonight. And I kind of, I've flashed back to like, hey, we're going here. And he'd be like,

I'm like, dude, this place is gonna be awesome. He would barely order anything. Yeah. Yeah, but he smokes. And I feel like when I smoked, that's how I was. Really? Yeah, because cigarettes dull your sense of taste and they dull your appetite maybe.

Yeah. I used to eat like one burrito a day when I smoked cigarettes. I would eat half at lunch and then I would save the other half for dinner. Wow. And that's... That's not enough. It's not enough. No.

But that's all I did because I smoked the rest of the day. Look at them out there. Now they're back outside. Spoon Chef. I wonder if there's a whole group of fans that have gathered around. Probably. Yeah. They all know he's in town.

Did you just turn it off, Chef? People know. I got hit up a lot by people asking me if they could come watch and work today. Oh, wow. Yeah. Once we post it, people are like, I won't be there. No, I'll probably be in my own town. I'll probably be in my own town.

I'll probably be in my own town. I'll probably be in my own town. I'll probably be in my own town. I'll probably be in my own town. I'll probably be in's in town. You know, I got hit up a lot by people asking me if they could come watch and work today Oh, wow. Yeah, once we post I'll probably be in my hands too dangerous. Yeah, he needs to focus on the work not the fans Look at him stirring in the pot Don't usually do that. Do you have a dining experience in your life that stands out as like incredible? I think your birthday Where Charro didn't eat any of it? That like incredible. I think your birthday, where Charo didn't eat any of it. That was awesome. That was a lineo. That was really amazing.

Italy, like every meal we had in Rome was pretty outstanding. And I'm still marveling at like every meal we had, no matter where was amazing. Itlians know how to eat. Yeah. What about you? I mean, both of those are huge experiences,

like lifetime experiences. The thing about the Italy trip is that it's so consistent. It's like anywhere you go, any choice you make is you can't go wrong. Yeah. You know, it stands out to me. Also when I was in France last,

you know, they also, incredible cuisine. So good. So good. And there's just like restaurants you just make note of. Oh, I would say the very first time I ever ate at Matsuhisa in Los Angeles, I was in my 20s and I was like, oh my God, this is so bad. So many Los Angeles memories though. Like let's, memory lane.

What was the, Speranza? And Silver Lake, that was fun. What was the place on Vermont? Italian. Il Capriccio. Il Capriccio, yeah. Rigatoni Norcina, I remember it was like, oh man, the fucking best.

And Mexican too. They got a lot of good Mexican spots in that one. Mexican joints. I feel like that can't be replicated anywhere else in the country. They don't do Mexican food right. I think of places that hit me like where I was like, wow, Red in Rochester, New York. I'm looking forward to going back to Rochester, New York just to eat at Red. What about that place in Cleveland across from the club? It closed. I know and I love that place. That chef Sawyer. I think god damn it There was like a line out the door. It was right across from hilarities

Really good. That was me. That's a that's a memorable restaurant to me because I would go in there alone on the first night I got there just to order a chicken and sit there by myself and eat it It was so it was just chicken, but it was roasted so well You know, yeah, that's of, I think, a good place when they can do the simplest things very, very well. Very well, yeah. Just like one item. You can't eat somewhere,

there's a thousand fucking things on the menu. It's never good. Like if you go to a deli and they've got the pages and pages, you're like, why? This is a Jewish deli. There's pastrami, lox. I know. And what, you know, fucking tuna melts.

That's it. That's really all. Yeah. And matzo bowl soup. I don't like, what was the absolute worst was Barney's Beanery. Yeah. Barney's Beanery in West Hollywood

had like a 12 page menu and also 12 different styles of cuisine. So you could get Italian, Greek, Thai, Indian, American. And you're like, wait, how do you do all these here in this? They don't, there's like one thing. You get a cheeseburger there. That's what you get. It's bar food.

Fucking cheeseburger, yeah. Well, that's what I've learned. Traveling is don't fuck around with anything weird. Just get what that place. The specialty. Is good at, don't fuck around. It's Yeah. Weird, just get what that place. The specialty. Is good at, don't fuck around. It's like when you go to a steakhouse and someone orders the fish or chicken,

you're like, you're a moron. Why are you doing? Why'd you come here? Don't go there. You go there for the specialty. Yeah. Exactly. No. Exactly. No, no, no.

Wow. What? We're watching them progress. He is running in bracket. I know. Can you imagine if we didn't give him Tanner today? He is really running him into the ground. I don't see a lot of action here. I just see a bull of pasta that's been made. I kind of feel like a natural in this coat and hat. You should pick up Chefery. Chefery? Yeah.

My next thing. I mean, he did it. Why can't I do it? Yeah, you totally can. Why can't I be like Chef Tom? Book me. Go to culinary school. Book me now. I want you to stop thinking, stop thinking, stop thinking. Book me now. Pick up that phone. How long is culinary school? Hey guys, go get me four phones this week.

Tom, let's go. Go to the Cordon cordon blue yeah, how long is going to do it 60 weeks? No, it's just over a year. Oh That's not that crazy I don't know why that's Texas culinary. Yeah, no thinking like 60 years. Yeah Wait wait, what about in France? Yeah 60 years. Yeah, I was like, Oh my God. Wait, wait, what about in France? Yeah, the Cordon Bleu. Yeah, that's like a real and that one's tough, isn't it? Isn't that the best? I don't know. Oh my gosh. Three 10 week terms. Okay. Okay. Nine months to be a grand diploma. Pastry diploma is nine months. Intermediate pastry is three months long.

Superior is another three months. Okay. But isn't the hard part getting a gig? Like you have to become the apprentice, the sous chef, and then work your way up in the kitchen. You really gotta love it though, if you're gonna make that your life. Oh, yeah you do. Especially baking. sous chef, and then work your way up in the kitchen. You really gotta love it though, if you're gonna make that in your life. Oh, yeah you do.

Especially baking. Like chef, I think. You know, the bakery, the baker has the toughest time, right? Cause you have to wake up at the butt crack of dawn. I remember. And proof the croissants or the bread. The pastry chef, remember Back Door Bakery?

Yeah. Silver Lake, people know, if you know, you know, back in the day, early 2000s. Yeah. so we're like, yeah people know if you know, you know back in the day early 2000s Yeah, and that lady was was the baker and I remember I flew with her one time We just randomly were at the airport together and I was like, I love going there. He's like, yeah, it's fucking killing me This is the schedule and then one day it was just closed Broke my little heart and great broke my little fat heart. I know. You know a lot of people don't know about restaurants.

Forgive me if I'm repeating myself. Just tell me if I've told this story. Well, the amount of roaches and filth and rats. Nice, this is a nice spin. Thank you for pivoting into this. It's so true. That just naturally occur. I mean, I've worked in fancy French restaurant.

I've worked in an Indian restaurant. Starbucks was probably the only one that didn't have roaches and rats. Well, I'll tell you this. When you get into high level Michelin star places, the one thing you find so consistent in them is that they are impeccably clean. You don't find any like-

You don't think so in the back in the tubs? I'm not saying think so. No, of course not. You're thinking of like the kind of restaurants that you frequent on a regular basis. The normal people restaurants. Yeah, not Michelin star. Fancy chef restaurants?

No. No. No. I remember when I worked, I worked at this Indian restaurant in Los Angeles and I had to scoop the mango chutney and put it in these little plastic to-go containers. Tom, Tom, you haven't lived and experienced the dregs of life until you've scooped mango chutney

in a dirty fucking bin in the back of the restaurant. And there's like, oh, it's so smelly. And then their aloo gobi, you know, the cauliflower would come in with just chunks of rot on it, like parts that were bad and they cut off the rotten bits and then make the aloo gobi with the rest of it. I was like, nice to eat at that Indian restaurant till I worked there. Never again. Thank you.

It's a really popular one too. Why did you make this your sidebar, why? Because I think that people need to know how hard it is to work in the food service industry and how gross it is. That wasn't the point. It wasn't, it was so disgusting. I bet we have a lot of people who work in this industry

listening to the show. Yeah, it looks like, like look they're making progress Chef is dealing with I believe scallops right now Yeah, they usually brown up within you know, two minutes we're done. Hmm. So his timing is very interesting. I'm just saying Perfect I'm saying the timing of the pasta and the scallops Usually from this angle it looks absolutely perfect. I'm saying the timing of the pasta and the scallops. Wow, look at that. Look at that color. Very dark. Dark, deep brown scallops.

Yeah, perfect. Usually you don't eat them that dark. Usually they're not that dark, but this is in different... It's toasted to perfection. It is really nice. But I am glad to see that he is but this isn't different. Oh, it's toasted to perfection But I am glad to see that he is cooking the scallops through that was one of my concerns That's your choice I was ready to go either way Yeah, I mean this is what we do Yeah, I mean this is what people do What's the shittiest job you've ever had that had the best perks

That had actual perks cuz every crappy job that I've had there is always a perk I'll give you a for instance Okay. I used to work in the parking booth at my school. Yeah. University of San Francisco, I gave out parking. And then I just hooked my friends up with free parking permits. Or I'd get to smoke cigarettes or smoke pot in the booth. Yeah. And that was really cool. Of course, Starbucks employees, summer of 1997, all the madeleines and coffee I could eat,

even though you're only allowed one drink per shift, I would still steal them throughout day cool. I lost like 20 pounds that summer got super thin. That's pretty cool Yeah, cuz I didn't eat all day. I just got jacked on coffee Yeah, I mean when I worked in restaurants Chibo and there was that pizza place on Riverside Drive. I forget the name of I mean, it's obviously food So like you could just it's good. Yeah good. And the chefs, especially like at Chibo on Sunset, is you're working your shift, they're like, what do you want? And you kind of can go make this, but like modify it.

Throw this in there instead, throw the spice in there. Like you could just, and they would just do it for you so that you'd get like the exact dish. So that was a perk. Another one, it's also food related. When I worked as a site rep, remember when I worked at Hollywood? Yeah, yeah the the owner of that company just liked me mm-hmm and sometimes he would just be like oh come meet my girlfriend and I at this

restaurant and I would just have dinner with him oh that's good he was just a nice guy like that yeah yeah and then we would you know get into he's like I come in my bathtub and I'm like, all right Yeah, I mean I was always a terrible employee but I always made friends with people I think that's what kept me around a lot of jobs before I did this for a living. That's for sure Oh, and they pulled out the stainless steel, you know, it's also interesting is To wait to start Also interesting is the decision to wait to start this. Yeah, it's taking a while. Yeah, like a lot of chefs would have been like,

huh, that hot thing we should probably get. You taste that when I tell you about that, that's remarkable, that's beautiful. Oh wow, he's doing a full cooking show style right now. I tell you that that is divine. If I took one of those out of that pan, that wouldn't melt. Well, an interesting Tom too, if you've worked in food service,

you know that the timing of the plates is very important. When you work in a restaurant, you wanna get that appetizer order in, and then when they're halfway done with the appetizer, you put the order in for the entree so that the timing is correct. Now, I will say the timing on this is taking a bit longer than we expected.

Longer than I like. Yeah. Interesting. If we were at a restaurant I'd be a little upset at this point oh there's a nice huge spoonful of butter and a second one it's very expensive French butter by the way and then there's gonna be olive oil on top of the butter? Is that what we're doing? That's gonna be beautiful. No.

Okay, good. Olive oil and butter? Olive oil, chef. Give me butter, add butter? We added butter, chef. We just added butter. Give me more. More butter, chef.

More butter, chef. Okay. Give me that wine. I feel sick. A third spoonful of butter is going into that pan. This is never done before. I've never done this before. But because I'm so creative, so I'm so miraculous. Tom, I'm gonna let and champagne, man. This is never done before. I've never done this before. But because I'm so creative, so I'm so miraculous.

Tom, I'm going to let you try this meal. Well, I mean, of course. I think I want to. Oh, you want to. I don't know, dude. OK, open that up. You're going to be calling Tanner? I'm going to wait here.

I know he's got his hand oil. Oh, he's opening a bottle, Tanner. Is that the pairing? No, the chef is probably having him pour. Oh, he does not open it. Please don't tell me he's gonna put the scallops in the butter and the oil. It's already been in the butter and the oil.

He's got tons. There's more oil. Wow. Oh my God. He's gonna start a grease fire. This is vile. Don't you dare say that. I mean, I'm sorry, this is experimental and fresh. What the fuck is he gonna fry in there three different oils? Hello. Hi, so such an interesting choice to see the three spoonfuls of butter and olive oil

And why did you do that? Pepper chef, okay Okay, yeah, you have to do it I got. Did you realize you'd be working this much? So the scallops are those good to go it looks like those are cooked. They're very brown Tanner has the pasta already been cooked Just one just one at chef. Just one. Just one at a time? Are you joking? There you go.

That's what you looking for. I asked you to put one in, that's what you looking for. You looking for that shit. Now I know the rest is going. Although I knew already, because I've been doing it a long time. Adam Owen. Adam Owen. Okay, I'll let you go, I'll let you go.

Go do your work. Thank you. Thank you, thank you. I really hope that he's taking the tails off and deveined and cleaned. Why? Why? What are you talking about? Not yet chef. I'm not sure which kitchens he's worked in before, but this is not an efficient way to cook. This is interesting. I've never seen somebody do it piece by piece by piece by piece by piece. Tanner looks terrible. He looks so scared. Oh Tanner not in the pan.

Wine Chef. Tom you're definitely eating this one. Oh here comes the wine. Oh it's not yet. So the scallops are cooked. Okay. Not yet. Okay. So the scallops are cooked Nope the wine goes back Wow And chef is so comfortable on mic and on camera I think from all his Instagrams like look at him right now He's talking to our our remote camera out there. Oh, there's heavy creamer heavy cream. Heavy creamer. Oh, fuck. And did he bread the shrimp too? On breaded shrimp creamer?

No. Wow. Aw, shit. You're, yeah. This is something else. This is all the stuff that gives you diarrhea. It is. This is literally the stuff that makes you sick.

Certain days you just gotta kinda go for it, I think. And the narrows that I'm gonna create is gonna be great. This is the longest meal I've ever seen prepped. I know. Especially seafood cooks up pretty quickly. It does, I don't think those shrimp are ready though. Fuck no. But the scallops are nice and cool, which is what you like,

cold scallops. I do love cold scallops. Cooked, but he's letting them cool there and cool, which is what you like, right? Cold scallops. I do love cold scallops. Cooked, but he's letting them cool there. Yes, that is true. You don't want that food hot. You don't want seafood hot. Sausage, chef. You like it to cool off.

Room temp. That is true. Wow, I'm really excited for this. I really... I want to... I'm interested to see if I immediately get sick. Like what the... What the fuck is Tanner opening now?

There's more? More? Yes chef. I hope it's not more seafood. And I hope he cleans whatever the fuck is in there. So we've got the shrimp. Tanner's up, this is meat now? He's gonna go in with the shrimp?

No. Those are sauce and sausages? I think it's some Italian sausage. Okay, okay that could be good but there's already so much oil and grease and fat in it. How's it going out there Zola? It smells incredible. It does. Well there's an extraordinary amount of butter and oil being used. And now fat from the sausage. And the sausage is really heavy, hearty. It's very, yeah, this is very fatty. Very, very hearty for, it's 100 degrees outside. And we haven't started prepping for dessert, which is another interesting choice.

And I sure hope that is a quick dessert, because if he chooses to do a souffle, we could be here for another hour. Yeah, we can't do that, I have to get going, you know. Same. Yeah. Huh. Yeah. Yeah, his timing't do that. I have to get going, you know. Same. Yeah. Huh. Yeah.

Yeah, his timing doesn't seem to be chef's strong point right now. Or is it part of the experience? That's the thing is with these guys, you never know. If it's like, oh no, I wanted you to exactly wait that amount of time. I remember when we were at Alinea, a similar kind of moment happened where it was like, why are you bringing us downstairs to the kitchen? Right? And then we have the shrimp down there, and then we go back in the whole setting

So it's like playing with your senses and he might be doing something similar possibly Tom possibly At the grocery store chef mentioned that you cannot rush perfection I mean, it's kind of hard to argue with although Now I do love in terms of dining I I am partial to more trashier, obviously. I love a Sizzler. I still, I don't have many more, right? I don't think they exist, Sizzler. I don't know if, I mean, I think they exist,

but there's, can't be more locations, gotta be less. Spaghetti Factory back in LA. Did you ever go to the Spaghetti Factory any, Josh, back in the day? No, I never did. That was a good one. I don't think so. Spaghetti factory. Okay.

Yeah, that was a good classic. Wow, so the shrimp is cooked, they're cooking. So some people actually, I don't know how much shrimp is cooked. The scallops are totally done like you said, probably 15 to 20 minutes ago. The shrimp is cooked when it turns pink. That shrimp is cooked, all right?

That's how you know. Pasta was done long before that too. Long before. What you wanna do is space them out is usually what the chefs say. Right, and pasta. When you're making a dish, space everything out that's going to be in the dish. Pasta only tastes better when it sits in its own water. Yeah.

You know, you want that real soaking. And then what about the sausage rolls that he, you know what I mean? Oh, here comes the heavy creamer. More cream. Interesting. Wish coming, Chef. I've never seen Tanner's off running again. He's having him go get more things.

Okay. He's talking about combining what he does here. Oh no, please. It's... There's a whisk. A whisk. Okay. Here you go, Chef.

There's your whisk. Can I whisk? No. I'll hold it. Okay. No. Whisk That is so much butter and oil and grease Yeah, it. It's really. Ladies and gentlemen, you gotta open up that one. I have so many questions. I tell you that this is gonna be miraculous. This is gonna be a success, sir. I got the pesto, chef.

Okay, good. Okay. Give me the heavy cream. These are sauces? Yes, chef. Canned pesto. Canned pesto. You know what's interesting is that he had mentioned

how much you have to have fresh ingredients. Yeah. So you go for canned or whatever and it's a no But then he doubles back and he uses it and it's again It's that unpredictable nature of geniuses that you just and that's true a lot of chefs will make pesto By hand because it's fairly simple, but not him. He's saving time to focus on what counts Yeah, this is interesting because he doesn't take into account his feet He just says I don't have time

Now we're pouring the heavy cream in the oil in the butter What's gonna go in the heavy cream Tom, what are you thinking? Oh the burners out. Is that what's happening? Tanner's gotta light it again. Oh dear some technical issues Heavy creamer Put that down and give me another one. So this is going to another With heavy cream, you don't want to let it curdle or burn too fast. It gets it gets thick pretty dang quick there Okay higher other Curdle or burn too fast. It gets it gets thick pretty dang quick there. Okay Higher other

Carton of heavy creamer. I got to tell you Tom in our home I go through a tiny container of that creamer in about a month a month to use up that much creamer Okay, we're risking now. That's a lot Was he going to make a bechamel? Maybe this is a bechamel. Okay I know we haven't used the wine yet. The sausages are still raw sitting behind them In the sun. Pesto, it's going into the heavy creamer. Oh Smack and it'll come out in clumps exactly how they tell you to do it

In culinary school, this is extraordinary to watch in real time Yeah, normally you don't see people put jarred pesto in containers He's gonna say, you know, I don't want to waste my time. That's another thing I have to say I respect how he doesn't waste his time. Sure. He doesn't waste his time with the bullshit Hey, I'm gonna get a food processor and you know spent like get all these things together fresh and give you like also I could just open a can Why chop the garlic you can just buy it oil soaked? pre-made salad mixes also

pre-made salad mix. That's great. I mean I think he told me this is something he's never done before. I'm excited to try something that's never been done. That is really special. I wish you would have practiced. Yeah. So Tanner's like where's the uh oh what did Tanner lose? He, there he goes. Tanner looks like a cartoon character. He is frantic. He really is. So I'm seeing it's like a light green cream sauce now. Looks like the wind is picking up out there too.

Chef is just absolutely crushing it though. I got the tomato, chef. Oh, here you go, chef. More tomatoes. We've seen tomatoes in the first and second course. So this is interesting more tomatoes. Tomatoes are so versatile You don't just limit yourself. I broke a ball chef Okay, and again, are we gonna ever touch that sausage? Did get them into little balls ready to go interesting Tom too. This is an Italian feast

I don't recall eating anything like this in Italy. I never, ever had anything like this. This is very interesting. It's a ton of sauce. Just the, I mean, he's cooking for an entire army. Maybe he's cooking for the airlines, in his mind. Here is, finally. Oh, fuck, there's more oil in the cream?

Oh, that's wine. That's wine, yeah. Okay, thank God. Fuck. Oh my God, dude, what? I've never seen anybody do that in a cream. Well, he did say it was gonna be pink, do you remember that?

Oh, right. It was one of our first conversations, he goes, what do red and white mean? But that's green and white and red. Thank God. And brown. Ha ha! Beautiful. A bottle of red wine.

Butter and olive oil. Wow. Okay. Is that champagne? Stop. Champagne in the sauce? That is bold. Bold.

He said he's doing things he's never done. We might get ripped after this. Oh, Tanner. Should we have some? Okay. Okay. How much champagne are we going to pour in, Chef? No.

Oh, God. I feel sick already. Oh, I'm ill. He already put in an entire bottle of red wine. And now there's an entire half a bottle of champagne. Yeah. Let me get that whisk back. We're almost done, ladies and gentlemen.

Oh, he doesn't need to whisk. I'm going to puke. What are you going to puke on? I mean, I cook a lot. I love to cook. You know, it sounds good right now the original New York strip he was proposing Potatoes right pretty straightforward American cuisine, but he's going Italian you wanted seafood I think he also was playing a trick on me. He knew how to make his client

surprise Fulfilling playing a trick on me. He knew how to make his client happy, surprise him at the last moment by fulfilling his original request. Huh, well. Should we take a break and pee? Okay. Wow. Wow. Wow. Okay, so this is first done before.

Bring it here, would you please? Let me finish it. Yes, chef. Bring it here. This has never been done before. Never been done. Never been done before. I've never done it.

I never practiced it. Why would I when I know about flavor? I know about flavor. Why would I do that? Okay, so what this is, this is the John Segura. The John Segura. The John Segura. Okay. Special. Wow.

So we added champagne, we added red wine, we woke, we woke it up. That's infused with flavor. God, I cannot wait. Flavor, flavor. Okay, so you don't want to chop basil up too much because these have oils. And if you chop them up on the board, you don't want the oils to get saturated in the bowl.

I mean, in the cutting board. So that's why we do is pick these. And that's really the absolute way to do herbs. OK? Bon appetit. Thanks so much. Wow. Chef, as we prepare for this tasting,

would you mind joining us again here in the seat? Oh, I will, sure. Absolutely. Great. I'll sit for a little bit. Tom, that was amazing. Yeah, please. Water?

So we have scallops, we have shrimp, you have wine, red, and champagne. Incorporated together. Wow. So red wine and champagne. I did. Oh, that's awesome. I did.

I did do both. Thank you, Josh. And that was the kick in terms of what I never did before is the champagne and the wine together. That's a wonderful idea. Oh, okay. So extraordinary looking. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Bring me the lemon. I'm sorry. It's okay, you can stay, wait. What's that? Bring me the lemon. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You can stay here. They'll get it. They'll get it. They'll get it.

Okay. Wow. Wow. We were watching you, you know, like I said, we're big foodies. We watch all the chef shows. We obviously watch your Instagram all the time. And watching you work out there was a real treat. And we've just been salivating, fighting over who gets the first bite.

Here's your lemon, Chef. Can you give it back to me? I just want to change it. Sure. Perfect. Wow. And the phone keeps ringing and the seasoning keeps coming. That is so beautifully done. Nice squirt. That is masterfully applied. Wow.

Here, let me help you with that. Don't get your sleeves in the same spot. This is amazing. Now how many bookings have you made since you've been with us this afternoon? Oh, too many. I bet. It's hard to keep up. It really is. Well, this is such a treat.

We have been going back and forth on who gets the first bite. I tell you what, that's how you can make it even. Oh, tell me. You take your fork and she take hers. You get one side, he gets the other side. Oh, that's so nice. What a lovely idea. You do it together like a family.

Lady and the Tramp. That's a lovely idea. Well, look at that a family? Lady and the Tramp. That's a lovely idea. Well, look at that. Here's two forks. Perfect. Cheers. What are you going to dive into first, Tom? God, I want it all.

I think maybe one of these scallops. Scallops. Looks very well. Can't go wrong, and you know what? I'll do the shrimp. Okay. Because those look incredible, and I just love your seasoning that you've put on. Oh, thanks. Cheers. I got some of that sauce because this is really the moneymaker.

And also, I just, if you don't mind, I would really love no interruptions as we do this. No interruptions at all. Yeah, I just, I really like to concentrate on what I'm... Your flavors and such. I agree. I don't want to beat you to it. Cheers. Okay. So y'all have your own dish. Wow. The John Cigarra. Cooked to perfection.

John, why you doing that? You pranking? I mean I Will say You know And this is no shit I've been to Alinea in Chicago. Mm-hmm. I've been to Zen in Singapore. And I've been to Latier in Paris. That's the best thing I've ever had in my entire

life. Without a doubt. Thanks somebody. Amazing. You know, that's... I really don't know how you did it. That was really extraordinary. I think as a treat, I'm going to go ahead and I've... Normally I wouldn't do this. I'm going to share with the staff. So I'm going to allow everybody here've normally I wouldn't do this. I am gonna share with the staff So I'm gonna allow everybody here to have some of this too

So go ahead and get my eyes and you guys just nice try and and enjoy here you go Tanner Yeah, I don't want to just hog it all to myself, you know, I mean But no and especially ten or you work so hard on this you can get definitely have the first bite Yeah, you can have an extra serving for yourself. The sauce is incredible. That sauce is just, I don't know how you did it. So in the moment, you decided or did you pre-plan the champagne, the wine, the butter, the olive oil,

the heavy cream, how did you come up with that? Was that just inspiration or is that? It was inspiration. It was something I wanted to present that was never been done before. I get bored quick. I get that. I do get bored quick, sir.

I get bored quick. Is that a potential client? Yeah, I think so. Hello, how can I help you? Chef speaking. Hi, is this Fabulous Chef? It is, how can I help you? Do you come to, is this Fabulous Chef? It is. How can I help you? Do you come to Ohio?

I do. Anywhere in the world. Are you going to the opening next month? I do. What about on the 25th? Of October? Yeah. Okay, how many people?

It'll be six of us. Any allergies? Turkey. Be six of us. In the ology? Turkey. Minimal or extensive? Minimal. Expensive or inexpensive? We can make it expensive. Okay.

Venue? It'll be in the house. Mansion? No. I can't do it. That was fucking unbelievable. I loved watching that. That was so great.

This guy tried to book you. Yeah. Wow. And as soon as it was clear that he wasn't in a mansion, you were like, it's over. You just hung up on him. Well, I'll tell you why. A lot of people ask the question and they wonder. I've been in tight kitchens with a lot of chefs. Normal chefs on the lawn job, broil, saute, fry, garmage.

So you have normal chefs in the kitchen. And if the kitchen isn't big big enough the two things that is implemented is safety and cleanliness. Yes. So if it's too tight and you got a knife, you're in trouble. And it gets dirty. And it gets dirty. So when there's room with the expansion of the room, there's room there so everybody have space. Makes sense. So you heard it here from the chef if you don't have a mansion don't even bother calling Like just don't call he doesn't have time for your bullshit. Did any of you get a chance to try? I'm eating some of the shrimp right now. It is incredible. Yes, unbelievable

That's important. Yeah, you know And a lot of times people want to video record and I don't make that an exception. Mm-hmm, you know, you don't want the room on this page. And a lot of times people want to video record, and I don't make that an exception. So it's okay, but you can't do it in a tight space. If I could barely move, could you move and see anything? I love it. You know what I loved about my bite of shrimp is the tang. You felt the pop from- Well, there was that last moment application of three lemons that I think

heightened it so much. But it really brought out the champagne. I tasted the champagne. I tasted the wine. You taste the wine. You taste the heavy cream. You taste the butter. You taste the olive oil. And the pesto. I forgot there was pesto. Yeah, cans of it. There's a... without that weight, you know, another thing in the kitchen is important is your timing. So if you come to order, right, the two of you come as guests. Yep. Yep. You don't want to wait 20 minutes for food. No. Who would want to wait? Exactly. So what you have to do is you have to generate a system of speed. So instead of taking time to, which pestle consists of basil, olive oil,

Parmesan cheese, pine nuts. It's a lot of time. You save some time. So with those ingredients, you don't want to miss none. Yeah, of course. And you save time with it. Right. This is such an extraordinary learning experience.

Real treat to everybody here. I mean, obviously our staff was very excited. They all got dressed up. I think some of them, I know I actually want to take some of that sauce home in a cup and just drink it like it's a Gatorade or something. That's how good that was. It was so delicious. Very rich, very layered, great flavors.

Just to recap, plate of strawberries that were, did you pick those out today? They were unbelievable. And I felt like it was so nice to have the fancy chef strawberry experience. Then we went to the, uh, tomato and mozzarella slarberata slice. Was that? Bouchetta. Bouchetta. Uh, and then, oh, right.

Then the, the bread after that with the, the, the sauteed prosciutto, which is such an extraordinary choice. And then that seafood pasta dish really brought it home. I cannot wait to go eat some more of this. So good. Me too. If you're out there, don't forget to follow Fancy Chef. Fancy Chef, is it 13?

Yeah, Fancy underscore Chef underscore 2013. Underscore 2013, and a unique name for a unique chef. And you're still blowing up, of course, if you wanna try to book Chef, you have a favorite of your, you have multiple phone numbers. Do you have a favorite number of those three that are usually published? I do. You do. Do you wanna a favorite number of those three that are usually publicized? You do. Do you want to tell them which one it is? 570-604-3868. You knew it. He knew it. He said

the 570 is his favorite. And if you call, be ready to write a big check. But that's how you live luxuriously. And if you don't have a mansion or a yacht, you know, maybe wait a few years, cancel. Yeah, don't call, don't call. Chef, I don't know, this was such a treat. Thank you for coming in today. We were so glad you came in. We're not done.

We're not done? What do you mean? We need a dessert. I got a special mousse. There's a mousse here? Really? I'm not an animal. I want to make a strawberry mousse dessert There's a mousse here? Really? Look at the animal. I wanna make a strawberry mousse dessert.

Is it good to go? We ready for it? Not yet. Not yet, okay. Couple of minutes. Okay. I make sure it don't take long. All right.

All right guys. We're ready for it. Watch your head, watch your head, watch your head. Walk around. Guys, guys, somebody. Guys, walk him out. Okay. Chef, so excited for the final touch here.

Wow, look at this. Yeah, that's the final touch. That's the last of it. This is a champagne flute. What is in there, exactly? So I made a mousse. You made a mousse. Wow.

So we have a strawberry mousse, fresh strawberries, cream cheese, sugar, and champagne. It looks amazing. It looks amazing. Wow. So that's a sagura. That's a sagura right here. Look at this. The John Sagura dish and the sagura dessert. It smells extraordinary. I've never done that before.

You've never done this before? I always wanted something new to wherever I do. Wow. Make it outstanding one of a kind. It is really the best to do. I don't like to repeat dishes. Yeah, I can see. It gets boring.

This looks amazing. Well, from all of us to you, first thank you for this incredible experience. Nope, nope, wrong, stop talking. What? Thank you to all of us to you, first, thank you for this incredible experience. Nope. And, uh... Nope. Wrong. Stop talking.

What? Thank you to all of you. Y'all been amazing to me. I declare y'all really have. Thanks, man. Been amazing. I appreciate it greatly. My first podcast, cooking podcast, it's a banger.

It is a banger. It was fun. We had a blast. It was. And hopefully we can have you back some time. I know that it's going to be a lot of people hitting you up to do their shows, but you'll remember the first one you ever did. You know, it's like your first love. It is. You'll never forget.

Never. And I'm never going to forget today. There's so much to continue eating. And so we're going to leave you now. But thank you for watching. Thank you for listening and joining us. And we will see you again soon. Don't forget, Fancy Chef, hit him up. Book him, man. Book him.

Don't sleep. Book him. Beautiful and nice, right? Beautiful and nice. Beautiful and nice. Beautiful and nice. Thanks. Thanks, ladies and gentlemen. Don't be poor. Not at all.

Thanks. Bye. All right, man. That was great. Very good. Very good. Thanks, Chef. Appreciate it.

That was amazing, man. He was great. That was great. I thank you, John. Right here. Oh, Chef. Appreciate it. That was amazing. He was great. That was great. I thank you, John. Dirty son of a. I think this is Charlie Honeydun. Woo!

Yeah, that's Charlie. Oh my god! Oh my god! Get your passenger. Get your passenger, get your passenger, get your passenger. Son of a bitch. Son of a bitch, son of a bitch, son of a bitch

Fuck, who's this fuck? You guys doing good? Come, hurry up! Is that Charlie? Is that Charlie? Oh, Harry, son of a fuck Come down later for moose soup Come down later for moose soup Come down later for moose soup Come down later for moosu, come down later for moosu, come down later for moosu Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I'm getting cold out.