Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Episode 57

Episode Date: October 17, 2016

Mommy, mommy, oh mommy, mommy! Get ready for a good time. Fellow comedian and Southern Belle, Rory Scovel enters the mommy dome for the first time. Rory witnesses the unveiling of our producer, Blueban, to our Ustream audience, we then talk about a fun thing to try to your lover, more Beastie Boys love, couples that don't fart in front of each other, Cosby, shitty people that go to shows, Fill Her Up/Seal her shut, when eating pot goes wrong and more! Go to YourMomsHousePodcast.com for all the mommy magic!

and your jeans are up all the way past your shoulders at your ears and even your doggy your doggy wears jeans so if you watched or watch the u-stream version you will note that we had some technical difficulties at the top and so we are recording post recording for a pre cut-in recording of a recording that's fancy and uh... yeah you can see the debacle itself it wasn't that bad but you know we have some audio trouble so anyways this is uh... after the fact we recorded

an episode of your mom's house earlier today so yeah there's that and then uh... you have to fart oh my god oh baby oh did you hear it? yeah i heard it jesus it was kind of a quiet riot this weekend little mommy tina is going to be at the denver improv yeah but the 10th through the 13th denver improv come see me um i may fart you may fart and hug you if you come i love when the mommy show up

it makes my week so much better when i get to meet the mommies it's really fun and what about you tight jeans well my little cut-off denim shorts are going to be at the hartford funny bone this weekend uh also the 10th through the 13th next i go to the louisville improv and their jeans are super short mm they sure are i love that down home country jeans daisy duke jeans yes and um let's see i uh i do uh well right before i do the american comedy

company in san diego we have a very special live your mom's house that's right may 23rd of the john lovin's comedy club 23rd now what the fuck do we have to do to get our la our local mommies to get tickets to this go to john love its comedy club go to the website buy tickets what the fuck do we have to do man we're gonna do a live show we need your support the there's gonna be a great show the tickets are only 10 bucks it's uh that's way less than you pay to get to see our stand-up show it's gonna

be super fun it is it come out it'll be fun just watch us do this stuff um be a part of that'll be great and then after that i do american comedy company and then i go to new york to do gotham it's a lot it's a lot of touring coming up i know i'm gonna be home after denver for a couple of weeks no i'm gonna be in braille at the end of the month oh look at you i'm gonna be in braille well i mean you're giving your calendar for the rest of 2012 i think it's good to you got it i just did for the next few weeks

and then in december i didn't say december you know i'm just Jesus it's a little all right um what else did i want to tell you about something about your mother you farted awful today no i didn't win just before we sat down to record this remember you farted while we were recording it doesn't smell who says who yours was so bad i begged you to light a match come on man and you're like well you have matches in this house lies um i did also want to oh plug of course our guest on this who's not here to plug himself

rory scoville the very funny rory scoville he's not here to plug himself did you get it grow up he's not here you just farted in the microphone that's fine no one knows babe it's so oh it's in your mouth good good it's doing it you pig i hope your microphone smells like your butthole right now rory you can see oh so gross you can see rory's half hour comedy central special this friday so this friday which will be the 11th um tune in the comedy central he's kicking off the new season of the half hour special

tom how do you say 11 in in mexican on se on se de mayo rory scoville on se de rory scoville mayo you guys are really going to enjoy this episode with him he's really fun he's a great just great guy funny guy um no no fingers on his left hand i am so weird i didn't want to say anything he couldn't hold the microphone with that hand but it was so great to have him here and and just to see his right hand do all that work um so and if you watch the u-stream we introduced blue band we finally yes you get to meet blue band oh and this i

wanted to tell um our listeners to the u-stream is up and going we were on you know there's the videos and but you can find them at your mom's house podcast dot com will oh okay we'll be posting them there all right right um so right now they're they're sitting in the u-stream account but we'll post them on our website uh some people have had trouble with the ads and um i know there's a couple ad blockers that you can uh that you can download and i'll put those on the site so that you can add them apparently i'm supposed to be able

to pay to have no ads and um well we did that didn't we yeah i thought that was with the the hundreds that i spent to get this program so i don't know how many more how much more yet you have to give them to have no ads but uh i don't want you to have to look at ads believe me so we'll pay it and we will um uh take care of that oh and one last thing before we give you this episode we just changed the super mommy pack oh yeah for people who have we know i've met a lot of people like i'm gonna order it soon or whatever we didn't

dramatically change it but we uh basically ran out of cut man the uh that's the pilot um that was included in sold out sold out sold it out so what we did is we now uh have the kingfish t-shirt in place of it it's uh it's a little more but um you get uh really cool shirt you still get two albums and you get the poster so you get a lot of stuff and it's it's at a reduced rate if and if you were to buy them individually you're saving uh like a hundred and fourteen dollars also should we announce that our

schedule will be consistent from now on we're gonna start doing this every wednesday the yeah the episodes will be released every wednesday so you guys can kind of know what the schedule is we've been very inconsistent yeah that's our fault sorry yeah and so we wanted to kind of keep us all on the schedule so you'll know when to expect your mommies and expect an episode on wednesdays okay that's it and with that enjoy this episode of your mom's house and we love you we love you mommies bye bye mommy

there's there's something um you should know that the all the copy we did before gone we should do it again why because that only is going to be applicable to our ustream audience and not to our why don't we do it at the end can we yeah yeah okay we'll edit it in so we don't punish the people listening right now that's a good idea okay you like that no i want all right so we did that oh people are listening in their earbuds ew i'm gonna throw up oh god that's really not none not at all

you're not feeling it at all what is that it's not for everybody that's not beatboxing that's something else it's a that's shit boxing it's it's uh it's saliva induced beatboxing so ew lori i'm gonna throw up that's gonna be my new that's my catchphrase when i get to these when i get to a bunch line one of the reasons that we're having this problem yeah producer and people haven't met we've talked about him a lot we've talked about him for a while now but everybody knows we we don't work with red band even though we're still friends

with him and but what are you're here for a big unveiling rory this is a big deal our producer blue band here is about to make his are you guys ready for him i don't know if you're ready it's gonna blow your mind there he is there he is guys there he is he doesn't say much he's not very bright he doesn't contribute a lot and that's the guy that's been running a lot of our boards and yeah he doesn't really that's i think that's why there was probably technical difficulties you guys that's an eagle you guys have an eagle here though i want him to be a part of the show okay now that we've unveiled him okay let's uh let's give

blue band is he in frame he is is he is he down yeah yeah he's in frame there it goes there's blue there he is now you guys can see him are we ready to start the show let's start the show whoa huh that was a fun pretty exciting dance to it powerful yeah uh two shows in a row can't stop giving love it's devastating man i know are you a big beastie fan nori i'm not a big beastie boys fan but i really did like i like them yeah i mean i i think it's i don't think i've ever

met anybody who didn't you know like like the beast yeah yeah i mean you're a big you said you just went to see miley cyrus what i want to see miley cyrus uh at the bowl here's the thing that's pretty interesting uh it was the hollywood bowl miley cyrus and i was able to get side stage tickets wow pricier but it was awesome it was so awesome that was like one of your favorite shows yes well i'm kind of following her a little bit on the tour um so far that's been that's so where are you where you're going next to watch her oh well i'm taking a red eye tonight uh to philadelphia

just to see a show yeah yeah and then i come straight back that is good oh and then you come back after the show do it now because we're talking about like you're running up a pretty big like tab on like your debt yeah yeah you go to all these shows yes well credit cards and stuff and i'm a scott miles member so i cash in some of these miles wait what level are you are you on airline well since the tour started i'm at basic well i'm at gold almost i'm almost at gold again okay wow i'm going like in a circle to become regolded you know i mean that's pretty impressive do you feel like that it's art i love following art you don't feel like that's abusing like maybe

you're in jordan's future like to spend all this money on that in what way i mean just you could save that for like your guy's future you know no i gotta live for today i can't live for the future i gotta live for today that's a good philosophy what if my lady doesn't tour next year what if she doesn't put up a new album ever again what if the media who just can't keep their hands off of people brit tears her down from her ivory castle yep i'd know now that you're talking it makes a lot more sense thank you well and that kind of music is timeless kind of the way the beetles were like my dad had those records and i enjoy them and your children were and will enjoy miley cywis

cywis cyrus records and the experiences that you had those concerts yeah share them and i videotape a lot of the shows they don't want you to but i still do good very proud of you no but seriously the bc boys i'm fucking super bomb man i know and that dude mca i mean they're all super talented i really liked his voice i like his voice the actual sound of his voice i think he was also the coolest looking well i thought yeah well uh ad rocket mike and uh what's his name mike d looks like he looks like he has aids and then like if one of them is supposed to die it definitely looks like it should have been like d yeah he looks really sick he looks rough yeah i think he's is he a vegan is that why he's an aids vegan yeah he just he only eats vegetables

infected i think you should like if you look at vegan people you could be like uh maybe you're not supposed to be vegan like so maybe you should have a few more nutrients going in your system doesn't look good buddy doesn't look good at all um ad rocks cool i met him this uh past summer no you didn't i met him in montreal remember the picture of me that's right what were you what were you doing he came to a show he was in the show he's a fan he was in the show what was the show uh funny as hell and um they go uh one of the there was a girl who she does like a music bit and they're like oh yeah she has like a dj that um the plays while she does like funny songs i was like oh okay and then just you know that some people talking like i think her her dj's ad

rock i'm like really fucking wrap seriously and then you know they have the transport that takes you from the hotel to the venue and they're taping these things for hbo canada and so there's like a like a like okay your show too so you got to leave at three and then we'll pick you up at five so as they're i finished my taping i walk outside the van pulls up dropping off people for that next show and out of the van ad rock and i'm like what in the fuck man and you got a picture i did he goes i got i talked to him for a minute and he was nice and then he was like yeah just you should come check out this uh this show this girl she's really funny and i was like yeah i'm not gonna go watch that fucking girl do her show i'm not interested in seeing how dare you

oh you said that to him i know i acted like i was so i was like oh that does sound cool i'd love to see that um oh yeah that does sound cool yeah you overdo you clearly overdid the line oh that sounds fun where the where the pitch goes up yeah yeah whatever it's like that sounded like you're not gonna come no i want to go you are i want to go i want to go all right all right if you say you're gonna come then great i was like it's a funny thing um it just seems like you're gonna come so he's so cool they're all so fucking cool he took a photo but he told me no smiles man he's like we can't take smile yeah that's kind of whack so his picture he's like yeah he's called their b-boys we can't take smile pictures yeah yeah he's

like you know he's got a good point that's because he's got street cred i remember just smiling a picture you know not the b-boys do you remember like when you first my very first tape was licensed to ill and i was like in uh fourth or fifth grade and i just remember like it was i never heard music like that it just blew my mind open like paul revere i still know all the words to that one and uh they were just so fucking crazy and cool i'm so sad that they're gone i never got to see them live you got to see him though right i did i saw them at a universal amphitheater nice probably like six seven years ago and it was uh it was it's an amazing live show like they put on a show yeah it's actually by far the best i've seen i like hip hop a lot a lot of hip hop

live shows you're like uh this is fucking terrible there's a lot of it's so studio produced yeah that like when they're it's just a dj and so he's like you're like dude that doesn't sound good like their voice doesn't sound they're not performers yeah they're good to like put on headphones record their song and that's it but the bc boys was a show man like that was a really i mean you know there's live instruments they had uh mix mixmaster mike too who's who's a great dj but they were like i mean they were like changing into like these like 70s tuxedos playing instruments like jazz yeah and then like they're like and they would the stage would turn and they would come out and like b-boy gear and just do like all straight hip hop yeah and then they would come out and do like a punk set like

it was all mixed together it was a show yeah it was a real did you ever see awesome i fucking shot that no i haven't seen that yet but i want to oh my god that's an amazing uh show do you know the concept of it yeah like he gave people cameras in the audience to shoot the show themselves yeah it's like 30 uh it might be more might have been 50 but it's like they all had their own camera and they it was like film whatever you want the whole time so like some of the screens are like people like filming the show but then some of the screens people are like you know drunk in the bathroom laughing and like fucking around with the camera and like just going wherever i love and you know what i really liked about the beasties that they're so unique in that their songs weren't

about you know crushing pussy and doing drugs like there's if you listen to the words a lot of it's stupid you know what i mean of the beastie boys that they're rapping about nothing yeah my zodiac sign is scorpio and you're like yeah but it sounded so cool it was just fun it was all silliness and yeah positive energy as far as Stevens would say right yeah god damn it i gotta drink to you mca mca cheers people are giving a shit about uh uh what's up bonezone they're giving a shit about there's ads on the u-stream thing i i upgraded to uh with a producer pro thing i don't know what other upgrade i need to do okay sorry guys so yeah as far as the ads things i will um yeah if you have a suggestion of how i can upgrade even further and spend more fucking money on this i would

love to do that so please give me your suggestion of how i can no longer have any goddamn ads your mom's house is interactive we've learned to do this podcast with our listeners i like it we didn't know how to do shit and uh they tell us well uh obviously we love the beastie boys a lot but now i want to ask you how was your single de mayo it was special i was at the Cincinnati funny bone which is actually in newport kentucky and i had a woman at the first show the 730 show it's daylight pass out like blackout pass out and get dragged out into daylight and watched revamp it everywhere it was pretty crazy that's awesome that's a really good time it's so weird that like people feel like that's the one day they can get drunk like i just got to do it on single de mile like no this is

america you can drink any day of the week it's kind of the adult thing like right now in the middle of the day right you're drinking tequila right now on ocho de mayo which is a very it's a very special Mexican holiday what is it celebrating well do you know that what single de mayo actually is no it is that is the day that in mexico they discovered uh tapatio and chalula oh okay there's like yeah there's a in the oaxaca region there's a like a spring like it's like an oil link okay start shooting up okay all this tapatio and chalula and then they're like oh this is a very this is a very magical day here that's good to hear because now i don't feel like true story celebrating is offensive in any way because now it actually lines up now right that makes sense

that you would just get shit face you know i got a guy so upset on twitter when i uh like a few days before i was like single de miles coming up and then i put in parentheses a bunch of Mexican jokes like meaning like you know this is what everyone's gonna do and then hashtag lawn mowers and he was like he was like what the fuck like you hate fucking mexican and i was like why do i make it yeah right i'm just making fun of the fact that people are gonna make these jokes yeah it's like it's fucked up man i love being mexican but that's why it's special being a comedian when people really get you like that well that's why he didn't get the yeah he got real fired up man rory what do you prefer tapatio i just always thought well mexicans don't get jokes i have

like the weirdest kind of racism wait what do you like better tapatio or chalula important question um i don't know i don't think i know what either he is oh no it they're hot sauces i don't need a hot sauce you don't like that sriracha i like that too yeah but if i'm giving these options tapatio okay good right answer good answer um but i don't really i had dinner with you the other day and you had some indigestion going on that's right it led me to believe that maybe hot sauce isn't a good choice for you and you're exactly right but this could be good for your listeners because we both learned it if you are getting indigestion this is amazing take a little teaspoon of vinegar right straight down no and take a little sip of water not too much

i did two teaspoons of balsamic vinegar because we only had right right and my indigestion immediately went away and i and i you can tell tom was it was sitting right there watching me going from not feeling very well taking those two teaspoons 10 minutes later ate my meal felt fine wow i have to remember that let's give credit where credit is due to your jordan jordan borum she looked it up she looked it up and you also there was a little bit of distrust you were like are you trying to hurt me i don't i still don't trust her who knows what's who knows if that vinegar passed through me is it still sitting in there is it rotting by the way speaking of trust and spousal trust uh-huh i think tommy buns has a little story he's really excited look at his face

right now it's like this is christmas for tom's degree why don't you tell our buddies and our listeners here what you did to me last night it's really fun yeah you gotta do this you gotta do okay buckle up do this do this to your girl yeah this year this is really fun so it's not but okay you're in bed with your girl you're naked it's naked times just you wait wait wait you back that ass up what we were post coital right let's set it up so i'm saying you didn't say that okay i know you guys lay naked for a while i've always i think it's very romantic so you're okay your post coital you made sweet love you're you're nude and you're both feeling very close to each other and and you know you're affectionate towards each other so what you do is at that time you have

basically a a lot of influence on the per they they can really they're susceptible to what you suggest and true to be told true to be told i drank tequila last night too right so so what happened was i said hey babe you know there's something i want to do and and she was like what and i was like just just come here i want you to do this and this is what you have to you have to coach men do it like real sweet real nice not like you're gonna do something you know rascally right so she was like what i go just get on your hands and knees for a second and she was like really i was like yeah because okay so she gets on our hands but i didn't trust you i was like what are you gonna do and i was like no i just something you're gonna slap me yeah and

you're like no so she gets on her hands and knees and then i go she was like what i go there's a bucket right below you and she looked down and then i took her boobs and i started to pull them like that's great so much fun and can i tell you the best part about that's so good is that it is an idea that came to me two days ago when she was out of town and all i've been doing is thinking about it you know when you just like yeah i thought i'm a real weight and i was like i gotta get this done i gotta get this done yeah i get this time it's amazing how we can remember stuff like that but like something really important it's like i forgot i know but i gotta milk my wife's tits when she gets home i gotta milk her tits i gotta milk her tits

and he really played me out too because he was like like i wouldn't do that yeah he was like babe i can't wait for you to get home there's someone want to try like he totally set it up for like a few days yeah i can't wait to see your titties above all i'm like all right yeah so i encourage if you would to our listeners this is a great one to get our listeners to try and getting uh try and get your uh girl or wife in that same scenario and let us know how it goes let us know send us an email send us pictures send us your emails there um the girls like that like do you like it when you get no no not that but you like it when you get a text like can't wait to see those titties are you like oh that's sweet well wouldn't your husband and like yeah of course because you have

to keep the the level live you know but i just like we're like oh thank you i'm not saying i'm above it or don't do this i'm just curious to know it should we be doing that or are you or are all women just like oh Jesus no no no i i love it because it you know because it means that you know we're still into each other thank god i think the day that my husband stops fucking with my titties and yeah torturing me is when something's wrong that is true that is actually true as if the version's like yeah i'll give a fuck about you yeah that's nice to tell me are you okay the only time that he doesn't mess with me sexually is when he's sick and that is when i know that something's truly wrong with you like if you have a fever yeah actually diary is not really

a deterrent for you so much mm-hmm he's told me that do you talk brown talk with your lady do you talk brown talk what do you mean like i kind of i don't know specifically what you mean like do we just talk about shitting basically that's what she means so did you make poop poops today yeah that's how we start uh no we don't really i mean it's no it's not that didn't come up but we never just that we have i guess there's just other topics what can i ask you that's what we won't avoid that topic no but what if you just because you live together right yeah next up brown talk brown talk coming up you've been warned it gets me every time it gets me every time it's so funny especially the poop sound is so funny i like i like watching other people hear

for the first time brown talk coming up you've been warned that's funny no he didn't know i love that do you guys do you say stuff like oh first do you fart fart in front of jordan yeah yeah i yeah i think it's weird when people don't i agree we're in that camp i you know what and here let me take that back it's not that i think it's weird i just i can't imagine being able to i i just can't it's too uncomfortable to not how do you i think if you're holding in farts you're holding in secrets that's my theory it's so dishonest now but what do you do when you have to make brown let's say you have something like you ate something bad and then you you're sick do you tell her like oh yeah yeah okay then you'll discuss it yeah i'll be like jesus i'm shooting a lot okay we're very casual about it

okay i feel like it always seems so weird to the the thing that's weird is that no one really like you ever talks about you know these kind of personal nobody but the thing that's but the thing and it i don't even think that people shouldn't not talk about it or i don't know if i phrase that right but i think there's fewer people who who think what we just said is weird there's fewer people than the people that who are like yeah definitely you talk about it like definitely you fart in front of each other but no one ever says anything so everyone thinks oh it's maybe no one else does it but the reality is everyone almost everyone this is like this is like 1 percent 99 percent yeah type talk right here i you know do you know couples that don't do it

um no we we know a couple yeah oh yeah yeah and they just and they don't both of those they don't like fart or talk about it wait but tami the couple that we know that i'm talking that i'm related to they have a weird relationship though right but it's true but it's true they do hold in secret they hold in they hold in secrets like they hold in their farts i couldn't i know it's too deceivable didn't know i was really concerned last night you were saying that you you traveled and you didn't shit i was real worried did you happen to get that makes me think of buttbeat boxing it's the worst sound imaginable and i can hear it right in my ears no tami you're right so last night we had korean barbecue my favorite and i came home and i didn't make a brown all day

because i traveled yesterday i flew uh so guess what this morning seven a.m i had to shoot something you you woke up and then and then what happened yeah i woke up at seven promptly uh and i go i went ahead and i made some coffee like i do every day and then wait is that lingo too no that's my morning meditation i don't know if that was diarrhea i made some coffee made coffee and then i made a brown and then i went on with my day okay so i'm happy to report that i did make a brown and i'm i'm thankful that you checked up on me babe yeah okay well i just really was worried that you didn't shit i know babe thank god you did thank god um now uh rory rory rory rory rory rory that's a british name are you are you british rory family british no my parents found the name in a

book oh it's very english i had an english tutor named rory once mm i find a lot of women uh more women are named rory than really really i didn't know that tell me where we can ask him well um i wanted to say that uh my friend we we did uh we met doing uh the ashville comedy but well first we did at lana right um the buck uh bucklin theater excuse me i'm just you can burp into the microphone we encourage that here yeah it wasn't the bucklin theater i don't know why okay it's theater oh this this was for laugh your ashville no on our way we did first we did we stopped the carl above the beautiful carl above carl above yeah he's a sweet sweet man sweet delicious man very delicious

sexual man sexual so you guys touchy feel a little too touchy feely i thought you thank you for my liking what kind of touchy feely do you like well i don't know he grabbed me between my legs it's weird like right away that's always and he goes there's a bucket below you yep i was like carl that's where you got that idea that is so rude i can't believe you're stealing that kind of stuff from people so rory scolville i've heard about you forever because tommy buns loves you so much and then you guys had dinner and i was gone we but i wanted to say this we did we did this at lana festival then we drove charl uh no uh atlanta to ashville right and it was you and me and carl and gilbert and gilbert yeah and um our buddy and one of my good friends and who

obviously your friends with two charlie uh puts together this uh this festival laugh your ash off which is crazy what it's turned into like it's turned into like a like a real event uh you know i mean like it used like he started like fifth year right sixth sixth year yeah well this year will be the sixth yeah and um they have it like it's like really become this real festival as it should it's a perfect city you love ashville i love it i think it's great it's perfect for a comedy festival tell you were just talking about ashville before we started you said yeah i'm gonna be there june 12th um doing a show kind of hanging out before i go to atlanta right before i go to atlanta all right well the festival i wanted to say is because we had a good time doing it so

the festival is august 14th through the 18th and the website is laughyourashvilleoff.com which is a play wait a minute that sounds like something else but if it's it's laughyourashvilleoff.com and uh jim gaffigan's the headliner this year nice so he's getting he's gonna get good one day if he keeps doing it he keeps going so you can um if you're a comic um and you want to be in the festival you can submit uh i guess go through the website laughyourashvilleoff.com and this year i know they're gonna have like a lot of uh you know a lot of industry people bookers it's not a competition which is what i like it's not like yeah you know like because the thing is like if they would have been a competition i would have won then you would have felt bad yeah i mean i know

exactly i mean so then it's like uncomfortable because the judges at those things are usually like soccer moms who were into like you know mainstream crap stuff rory and that's why i hate it i don't like the judges so yeah go ahead i probably would have gotten like 10th you know the judges are usually really quick and they're usually really they have their really sharp mind about comedy they usually ask just anyone to do it too like somebody who's never even seen kind like catchphrase like catchphrase you know that then oh i like him wait a minute you don't have hang me judge so i probably wouldn't even have placed no you don't have a you don't have a catchphrase in your routine in your in your sketches your comedy skits yes he does i have one new catchphrase

okay where i get to the punchline and i'm like i said 13 isn't that the worst sound in the world but last year it's a catchphrase it's a whole phrase oh it's terrible it's fun to do though isn't it do it try to just do the lightest level of beatboxing within your mouth okay ready oh wow that's really terrible too oh that that that it sounds like you're jerking off right yeah that's what i didn't want to say i beatbox when i jerk off when i when i watched him do stand up every time he hit a punchline he would go did you hear what i said all right that's how he would like wait are you all of his was it you who did bam you're pregnant no that's uh mike mike bright

okay sorry that guy's really funny do you ever have like and then you just shit out of me yeah oh i like him no wait have you ever had industry like agents have you ever had agents like talk to you or your manager about people that they think are really funny right oh my god i don't know you know who's great you know i'm okay you represent me am i right yeah the first festival i did uh the manager uh like the biggest manager that i know who was working with me was like uh you know who's really good i was like who i don't even say this i'm not trying to bring this but he was like this guy you're gonna hear about him he's really gonna be something i was like this is our first week like working together men yeah could you not talk about how great other guys are that you're

gonna make stars because he was like he's gonna be a star i was like who who is it i don't know it's blue band he's dead he's dead oh is he bill cosby you may have heard of him i feel like that means your manager is just an idiot he like he just started working with you and he's like no bill cosby is gonna do it you're like hey he's bill cosby's that he made i'll tell you he's gonna be big it's just been on and off the air i think he's gonna be big uh the cause is i lately uh his wonky eye yeah he's got a real wonky eye these days i don't know he's got something going on is he still on the road do you see that when he did that nfl thing do you have it uh uh is he still on the road he's do i think he did uh new port kentucky like i did

just last is he the hardest working comic in the business he used to be i mean you got a ratio as age versus how much work helmet how many shows i gotta tell you something so funny a comic said to me john decauze uh he was uh featuring this week with me and new we're talking about merch and selling after shows and he's like yeah you never heard about george carlin being like hey do you have change for 20 does anyone have five it's so true yeah that is true so tacky that's the point of that story do you sell marriage roaring you know what i i sell uh i sell mac football on here at it this is bill cosby the bobcats of ohio the call today from bill cosby this is football night on esb in two five and six but it's the typical owls

against the ohio you uh kitlin legs in the city of villagalpia and tonight ladies and it's so weird he's ahead of his time sober 100 so without question what do you think you heard there like what did that sound like to you you know i feel like he was mocking the fact that there's so much noise when they do when they go to the park i feel like he was actually making fun of them and he was doing it in a smart way he was actually well i think what he but i don't know if i'm interpreting it on his like trying to be like i'll defend him here i mean he might just been crazy it sounded crazy what he was doing was he was trying to do it like uh it was it's more

like a college band it's a reference to like old school um that's like the way that uh that college stop it rory uh football used to be uh dom say this sentence slower sorry you know they used to have they used to always keep saying it's a throwback to the way that college this football used to be they used to do everything was like a band like that's what he was going to he was being the band okay right but i didn't i didn't know that yeah which is even better and you insult me like that again he gets distracted wait can't tell you why my husband i love him but he can't do more than one thing at a time so i'll like i literally will watch him think thoughts like i'll look over and he'll be like this he'll be moving his lips like

then he says it and i'm like no he won't even say it i'll be like babe what are you doing were you just thinking just now and i'll be like shut up yeah what i do that sometimes i'll be like running a bit or i'll get into arguments in my head like i try to predetermine i do that uh confrontation absolutely i do that all the time i prep for confrontations absolutely with who who's your biggest person oh i mean just anything like if i'm going to be seeing someone i'm like i'll probably gonna you know they're if they're like snippy i'll be like oh what's a good line i can have ready to go like that's probably not a healthy way to live just prepping for war all the time no when do you do i like to do it at night when i'm laying in bed i'll be like and then i'm gonna

fucking say to that bitch i'm gonna be like and here's what i think about you and your face yeah you know who does it a lot is top dog uh my dad oh yeah so he'll be uh driving yeah what are you doing huh her just thinking about something just getting ready for battle just sharpening my blade sharpening my blade boy sharpening the blade that's a great expression for it absolutely is uh i uh i sell cds after shows to go back to that okay but i hate doing it oh who does it feels there's you know what i think there are comics we were like hey go like yeah usually don't like their act either but they have no issues selling merch i always feel like such a i do i know it's a horrible feeling weird yeah and it feels you know when it really feels weird

is when you have like like when you have a really good show and you feel like you feel like you did something cool right and now you're tagging in no but like when they're when no one's stopping by you're like you're like that was a good that was actually like i know how good it can get that was pretty good yeah and they're all and you're like no one wants one not even one yeah they're like good show man you're like you want to yeah like this and i don't want to i just feel like i feel like you go on stage you have a good show it kind of makes you feel cool like y'all i had a i had a show i feel cool but you immediately you immediately check that coat the moment you set up those cds and it's like guess who is not cool at all no especially when you have to set up your

own merch and your cds and you're like i gotta straighten these out i gotta take the label off of the thing and then yeah oh god it's i mean it's always good to make the extra money but here's a clip from uh sell your soul for it this is from christina's uh cd that's kind of a hacky topic there's something on elevators come on i'm talking about airplane food wait she's wait for the punch line it's the punch line you like that word play yes it's a long setup though well the pass the pass coming is it but i hold on wait for it what is this a catholic mass that was live from um germany i did that yeah you do multiple languages i do live from

amsterdam that's airing in july and then this one was what no work is live from berlin uh showtime oh yeah okay i do oh my husband likes to make fun of me is the way i'm adult pillar that's not very friendly but like he's so distracted today why i feel like i'm not really a part of the we're connecting over here what are you talking about you're over there it's like you don't even want to be a part of this what are you talking about i mean i just i feel you know disconnected how this could be the tequila talking but i no no i'm i haven't had the tequila and i know what you're talking about all right well um i want to plug uh rory your cd is called what dilation dilation um here's a clip from his cd oh that's not nice is he gonna come in here he's gonna

my ass i'm not even joking this is better than my cd he will yeah what is this i remember this see what i mean if you were to listen to my if you were to listen to my cd right now you would not laugh like that i didn't even mean to pick that clip but now i do remember it you remember and then you kick my ass you kick my ass it's a little girl okay which doesn't it's a little girl who's clearly possessed by someone who's 52 she's asked about like a man this little girl asked about monsters okay and tell mommy again what you said you were gonna do to him if he came here i said i'm gonna kick his ass oh that's not nice is he gonna come in here he's gonna kick my ass

this is a hillbilly kid he does have an accent he will yeah uh okay but that's not a nice word you should the mom had to make sure she got that video good for her good for her to be well well aware she's like look i got to throw down the parental thing so i don't get these comments from these fucking pieces of shit i'm sorry i forgot that this is actually rory see this on itunes can you believe i do all these like voices on stage literally i did that beeping i'm sort of the new michael wins like all right wow rory so get that that's on itunes is also on amazon.com if you want the hard copy and you know what you could

actually get that if you go to the uh your mom's house website uh go ahead click on amazon.com folks have fun uh color number seven it's your mom's house we got a free cd yeah you get that free that that uh now you're you're giving it away you're saying yes they're all go to amazon.com pay for it i mail you a check later on okay wow there's a kickback there's a kickback so it's like a rebate right just buy it and then just hold on like you'll figure it out my next cd i'm gonna have a thing that you take a card that you take out and it says mail this back for a rebate and tell me what you thought of the cd and just so that i get tons of feedback oh no and people like well i want my nine dollars back so that the cd was technically a dollar have you gotten uh uh hate mail uh i've

never gotten any like hate emails or not one i've hadn't gotten like bad comments and stuff on like youtube and itunes i really started to enjoy it i really enjoy if people's like negative comments because it's like it like here's the for me personally this was the end all of ever caring about a bad comment yeah tell me this good if you leave a bad comment there's no way in the history of things between the two of us you would have ever liked anything i've ever done or will ever do that's pretty because you're the kind of person yeah who leaves a negative comment right there we have nothing in common that's a grateful you're like telling me how bad my thing is and it's going we're not we don't live on the same planet yeah yeah you would never if i changed it and

tried to do what you wanted you wouldn't like that right you wouldn't like anything and you shouldn't try to please that person totally totally and it's like i was reading about um who is the one of the authors was talking about how to write a great story and one of his points was that like you can't write a story to please like everybody he was like try to try to write the story for like your friend that that you know that you like to entertain your friend yeah and like just write it for him yeah in other words and then whoever enjoys it aside from him that's great everybody else if you try to please them then your friend wouldn't like it anyways yeah i mean like that's what's just so funny to me about like the negative comments in general because that is

like because that's art like we were saying before when people come to a show and they like yell out and stuff it's like you don't know what fun is like you come to a show your shit face like you don't get anything like why like why would i ever make something for you right yeah you know like bad art has been made for you go soak it up it's all you can have it there's nothing but that on network television but i um i don't know what's i gonna say i forget well think how many bands or how many comics or how many like you know artists in general where you go i just don't really like their stuff and you leave it at that yeah you would never think to and if you met them and if you met them i guarantee you most most people if you met them

would go hey no i like your stuff right and they're nice just to be nice i know grand i'm not saying you should lie and be fake like that right but you probably would be like oh i don't want to create a weird tension i or i just won't say anything because you're normal and you're a happy person in your personal life oh what i was going to say too is this culture really this generation i feel sets up this um culture of criticism like on youtube like this is a brand new thing this ability like if you hate kim kardashian in two seconds you can find her on twitter and be like you fucking cunt yeah before you used to have to find her agent her manager get the publicist address write a letter down and pan a letter and now it's so quick and this whole culture of like

kids being like epic fail yeah fail win yeah it's so um hateful it's like it doesn't promote creativity yeah i think people just have this feeling of uh being owed something or being like very much like uh entitled is that what it is i think people just i think people that behave that way yeah i think people that behave that way act like they're entitled they do yeah and they just feel like they can say anything fuck off filthy fog oil oil oil on the road pakistanis and iraqis i'm up to monies and fucking cow park i'm sure i died these pubes just yelling out is this cosby again no no this is actually uh johnny david johnny david johnny david son let's go to johnny david son with the sports the college sports thoughts i'm a chicken

what johnny oh god go never mind go to cosby another game i'm sorry to interrupt you sometimes johnny david son will just yell shit out i like him he's like that yeah i gotta pee i'm gonna go pee i'll see you're gonna go pee yeah i mean is that okay i'm okay with it you guys are okay with that he went to make pee pee in his mouth i'm not doing that i hope not i should hope not i'm gonna turn this mic off i mean it's a really funny joke but i hope that you don't really do it he's been doing this joke since 2005 every time i say i have to pee what do you do oh like most of his act you guys work it out now have no we're not we're just gonna stare at each other the entire time we're gone you have any more tequila you know what i got fucked up jesus

she's wasted i got hammered on i got hammered on uh sink of the mayo are you gonna do two mics does it do you think that does anything for the listeners it makes you like hey leave a comment right now if this make this is like more surround sound if my audio changed let's see um yeah i had a i watched did you watch did you watch fights do you like boxing no no i watch the koto mayweather fight here yeah we talked about the other night it did i was fucking great i got real fucked up yeah and he said you had those girls over what shut the fuck up one she's in the bathroom this is recorded yeah she's in the bathroom you invited those girls over and you guys all slept together dude you said that i didn't say that yeah you did this is part of it this is a joke now no this is

not a joke you told me that you had girls over and you guys all had sex together we we i told you you said you were practicing that milking joke i told you wanted to run it a couple times before that was a bit i said we're doing a bit right now what that what the time that that was a bit remember no yes no you had sex with other women and you were an unfaithful husband and i don't know personally it doesn't uh i don't find it attractive here's another cut from rory cd i will back so i let you daddy don't hang it up talk to your daddy that was a really good keep that going kid is there more to that

you there's nothing in the world cuter than that and i'll i will uh i'll debate anybody on that you think that's adorable i mean just i let my favorite thing in the world is kids that age who are you can tell by the passion which which they're speaking they're trying to that they think they're saying something right but they're obviously and there's nothing to make fun of it right it's just the most adorable thing because they are looking you dead in the face yeah and they're like why don't you not understand what i'm saying and i'm trying and they know you're like i'm fucking saying yeah exactly yeah we like we got to go yeah we got to go because

everybody's waiting for us there's they're saying that it's the most adorable thing you have uh do you have oh look so that's uh yeah thank you is that hd i needed hd let's see if we can do uh nobody likes that rory yeah you wouldn't check the all the comments you're like all right look and i'm gonna believe unanimously no i just don't like that i'm sure that the audience loves that what's wrong don't say it i know every time we haven't recorded anything guys we haven't recorded shit this whole time are you serious no i'm like oh my god we've done that don't do that i'm not serious i'm not serious so rory what are you doing rory did you start stan of um in south carolina i started i the first uh open mic ever did was in south carolina and then i moved to dc and started

performing up there oh i did my very very first show in south carolina oh wow that must have been uh difficult it was fun because it was a poetry night and all my friends came to see me oh cool so it was very supportive slam poetry yes and boy i really brought some thunder that now i really got up there i said do my rhymes and stuff and is that is that a tattoo of michael jordan's signature on your wrist yes what's it that's uh my fiance's name jordan that's really good look at that look at that tom it's called love it's called commitment tom would you ever get a tattoo no never i mean maybe like of jordan that's a good point like that name or her face like headshot like a headshot and then like her sign it i should have done that i should have done that yeah i have

a would you rather if you want to do it what yeah i got a listener one could you what i'm sorry i try to prepare you i mean i i mean why are we doing that right now like why are you fucking wait what did you what were you about to do am i ruining something well you know when we do that we do that at the very end like why are you doing that you know why are you doing that i just thought i'd mix it up like oh shit did you see how uh passionate he got about this very minute problem but that's the fire you know he gets very fiery over like the smallest where's the soap i don't say that shit about where's the soap he just he gets very fire i would love to just hear you from the closed bathroom door where's the soap where's the soap

tom are you yelling in the shower it's just it's in the shower with you he gets very fiery what does your lady do i never knew tom you soap what is your does your lady do anything that makes you panic like my husband's passion sometimes makes me panic um like when he'll be like oh shit i'll be like what i dropped something like it's not a big deal yeah i think i think she's similar to that she can freak me out i'd probably do the same thing to her yeah i just like reactions are way too big yeah that's for the thing whatever that thing is on that heart attack yeah it gets you fired up that's what you love about him he's passionate latin he's a sagora he's one of the sagoras you get you get really uh

uh you get really like oh my god what's going on like if i just go like shit yeah really really i'm concerned because i'm genuinely like oh oh my god he's just being a sagora what can i do to help you uh uh you know what time it is sagora time this is a special game i love this oh cho demio game now it's really fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun there you uh there you go rudy vio it out oh yeah tom you never did it oh tom you're really good at it i've been doing this for years man yeah i bet you're good it's sucking it too you're one of the sagoras whoa that's one of the sagoras whoa

that was offensive wait what did you guys think i meant by it sorry what do you guys think i meant when i said sucking it uh tom now we're getting close we're getting close to make it weird is making it comfortable uh we can't be friends whatever um we can't be physical contact friends really grossed out right now tom are you gonna give us yes game okay we're playing uh filler up sealer shut okay so what do you think that means wait i don't know just ask rory what what do you think that means filler up sealer shut filler up slash sealer shut yeah uh i do like uh like a cement hole yeah yeah close to that i mean like you're saying like is a metaphor yeah sure yeah so what we're saying is who would you rather fill up and seal shut with your semen okay um so there's two

one was um submitted by uh one of our listeners and you can vote so we get we have the poll that you can vote on facebook people vote yeah if you go to facebook.com slash your mom's house podcast yes facebook.com slash your mom's house podcast there will be a poll where you can vote and our first one this is uh the food food network edition giada de lauronitis or rachel rey i don't know who giana yeah these are these are you have to yeah you'll get you have to see a photo of her should i look it up yeah look it up sure sure can we do a male version of the food channel yes that would be i could tell you the the okay okay go ahead sure yeah um is anthony bourdain or uh bobby flay oh it's easy easy peasy ready

well can i tell you you guys are going off of who's cool here no i'm not uh really no i think anthony bourdain would be the best in bed i think so too yeah i think why do you think rory willhorn why do you think he's cool i think he gets it you know what i mean i think bobby flay would he might be a little selfish i think so too he might uh go in to cook the meal for himself if you know what i mean see here's my my thought on this to give you my opinion yeah i think bobby flay would be more aggressive and um i think he might hold your head into a pillow he might tie you up if you're into that yeah i bet you're right uh i think you're gonna get at least a couple fingers in your ass with flay where i think you're right i think bourdain's gonna kiss around your neck and go down

you and yeah it really kind of he's gonna service you yeah i think flay might you know he might break one of your fingers he might yeah bruise you up a little maybe maybe anthony bourdain's a little more r and b about it yeah you know what you're right flay might be like oh you like having two teeth up front now you don't and fucking you know can i say how do you smell that girl's name that girl juliana rand chick what is uh it's g okay i'll tell you g just look up g g i a d a d e i know i know who's brought it wait what do you mean more and i you just throw it out and i it's like l a u r e n yeah it i s yes that thing about bourdain you're saying i think you might be right that he'd be cool to hang out with and talk to but it maybe as a lover not so much

yeah i had boyfriends in the past that were like oh i'm super sensitive i've done heroin i'm so cool and they're like the worst oh she looks like natalie portman yeah yeah yeah i thought so she's cute i like she's very cute but can i get some nice hangers on her too let me check them out but rachel rey is insecure enough that the next morning yeah she'll make you a full meal like rachel rey is insecure she's kind of because she's heavier and not as cute as is broad yeah so she'll go the extra mile i want i want the viewers to be able to know yeah to to be able to see it that's important in bed because the girl that doesn't feel so good about herself in bed right is willing to do whatever you know here's a good here's a good sexual photo yeah does that work on the

camera yeah here let me do it this way there's words now in our music huh viewers is that a good shot important part right there guys it's so sexual she's pretty look how sexual the picture is oh yeah it's too much oh she's cute but you know what though i like rachel rey's uh personality a lot more no but you hit the nail on the head and that is that she is gonna be like what do you want me to do she's so pretty she's very pretty you want me to spit in your ass like that's what rachel rey is gonna do you know why is that why do you think that's true because like we're saying she's why do you think that's true you think that's true because this broad is beautiful this uh what's her name she's giada beautiful she's used to being taken care

of in cater she doesn't have to try as hard she's not like yeah sure i like your ass yeah rachel's more of a midwestern thicker heartier gal she's had to work harder for it i think i i think you're right she's gonna yeah so who would you rather fill up or feel shut um rachel rey i think you're right yeah because she's really gonna do it she's gonna do it wait tommy what's your answer rachel i think i think uh this one i'd like i'd like giada what kind of food do they cook what's the difference in there that's a really good question yeah i'd like giada to break her spirit you know oh no i know what you mean because i feel like i conquer her yeah i feel like i'm good at that it's a very male instinct to break her spirit yeah it's a very male instinct is that it's a male

instinct kind of thing he wants to overpower her wait a minute yeah you want to overpower her that's exactly right um you want to show her look i don't care i don't give a shit this is what happened to me is that yeah you don't know it he's that good he's a sugoora yeah that's why i went giada that's horrifying i feel like i learned something about you today i'm not sure i wanted to know is that why you like me because you broke me is that what you're saying yeah it's fun oh my god what whatever okay go ahead so what kind of food can they cook you that's what i want to know i don't know i'm i'm i'm gonna go i guess that giada the laurinitis is an italian laurinitis i bet you uh rachel reyes i bet you had double bonus rachel reyes probably more comfort food

oh rachel's got the uh she cooks great italian food i watch her on on the food network rachel rey that's my answer i like rachel i'm down with rachel rey too i like her raspy voice i'm crushing spirits i'm taking giada on that one uh you have a great argument for it though oh my god i don't even disagree with your point it almost changes my my opinion there you go um kind of you dark piece of shit he's honest his soul is he's a beautiful honest man yeah he doesn't hide it that's why i'm married and who did you vote for um you didn't we discussed we had we had a really interesting discussion on uh bourdain yeah who would you vote for uh in ratrice now that we've thought about it for a moment maybe bobby flay because you want the wilder side well the thing is bourdain as a

dude to hang out with super cool but those guys are trouble like in rea in real life i've dated guys like anthony bourdain yeah it's too much trouble yeah but it's you're just for the night right i mean it's just yeah i mean for me listen to him yeah i mean mommy did this for the man like as a guy i'm gonna take bourdain because i think he'll be like a little gentler on me on you yeah sure so i'll take that's my answer too yeah i think i i think i'd have more fun with him yeah it'd be a good time and you could also be like let's smoke this see what it does he'd be like yeah let's do it yeah bourdain's so good it's not even about the sex yeah he's like bourdain ends the night going we could have sex but i mean god doesn't feel like we already did yeah and you're

like oh you're good i like didn't it feel like we already did like it does it does feel like we already connected passionately yeah because you want to like be friends with anthony is he a listener that's the only reason i'm you know we're sure every episode thank you yeah tony i mean it's tony b tony b tony b joe rogan interviewed him once everybody's really good that was really good it's phenomenal yeah well that was our game do we have another one um this house band is really willing to go the distance with you guys they're really well we do have another uh a listener submitted one do you want to hear one more yes i'd love to okay it is would you rather fill and seal myla kunis or natalie portman it's not myla it's mila oh i don't know her name okay mila she's

eastern european she speaks fluent russian fluent russian that's true yes that's a really difficult one and natalie's fleets uh speaks fluent hebra sorry myla kunis or natalie portman oh okay gosh they're kind of are similar they're similar broad that's why you gotta choose you know what i'm gonna go with uh mila kunis yeah straight out of the gate i don't even need to think about it yeah to me she's uh she just seems like she might be a little wilder natalie portman i want to hold and make love to you right really yeah you marry natalie and you bang the shed of mila myla wow i think so all right what what do you think i'm definitely mila i mean natalie she's don't get me wrong i love both of them they're they're great yeah i think i think natalie's a little bit like

i'm a little she's a little above it a little bit oh i don't know i don't get that impression oh i do uppity i get it i think so yeah she's like a harvard harvard oh oh because she's good i've been in the movie since i was 12 mom because she's good because she's really good yeah why would you want to be around that what's with you you know what i mean i don't you know i changed my answer i think mila would let you grab those lips between her legs like a fucking panini and squeeze them and chew panini time and she's into the cool phrase oh panini panini and then she's like she'll even kind of pull you over with you on a panini you're like i love you yes yes yes that's amazing you two together it's like magic

we're born to do this together this is amazing you want a panini yeah and i feel like you could definitely make her eat out of a dog bowl like all the stuff you want to do to chicks well never mind wait what do you mean all the stuff you wanted i've never once wanted to do that you know what i'm saying you know what i say no no like you fill up a dog right now i get to you one listener's like yeah i'm i'm with them on this one i don't know why i make all the people i feel like uh that like you could put like a bunch of like you know just a bunch of food grinded up put in a bowl you could hold mila's head she's like she would eat it out and you could be and then you could you know from behind you could do whatever you want to her and then why are you

looking at me like that wrong with you you're a complete derelict no who are you that's what people want doesn't know if you want um can i tell you i i'm gonna go mila's who mila we all want to see you shut but only because she seems unpretentious and natalie has that air of like she'll eat out of a dog bowl you feel like that's why is it pretend not bad is that pretend if i do podcast you should talk like this for now and say hello so distracting um here do stand up for yourself i'm gonna do this tonight yo yo hello everyone um i'm going through a break where are you are you going up tonight yeah where are you going up i'm gonna be at ucb comedy bang bang comedy bang bang ucb akba i'm doing uh the r bar in uh korea town what time anyway what time you going on

nine p.m the show hey i'm i'm doing the couch tonight oh that's why you're drinking early you're gonna go to sleep around eight yes isn't that the best um that's all i live for it can i tell you um i had a listener tweet us about how what's the best way to get over a breakup do you remember that yeah i would like to address that tweet because i think that's a really good question the best way to get over a breakup and um in my mind the best way to get over a breakup cookie butter very good answer holy shit that's just really good but the quickest way to get over an old dick is to bounce on a new one oh i like that i like that ew you know what i like that a lot but what do you what do you think rory what's the best way i literally that is the best way for bouncing up

and down on a new dick is one of the best ways to get over an old dick that you already rode get on a new ride i say what are you gonna spend all your tickets on the ferris wheel ride the roller coaster ride the porter reagan wheel that's get on it why are we talking about this what what does it have to do with this because somebody tweeted us this question i thought this is probably nothing to help people well seriously though like breakups are awful here you go um everything is time i know people will always say oh time hills i know i know for a fact that that is the shittiest thing to hear i know no one can hear that but it is the truth because after uh a certain amount of time your obsession with a particular object or addiction or anything after enough time you start

to forget because you start to fill that space with new things so the best thing you can possibly do is be patient wait it out and continue to experience new things that's why you see people that you get through a breakup they you know get a haircut or they uh they decide to travel these are these are good things just to kind of get you out of your old self and the and evolve into a new person and just accept that all things come to an end even the greatest things wow that's really thank you guys it's been a pleasure to be on the show yeah we were oh there's more time okay well that's really true that remember how you're talking about breaking habits at the top of the show he makes a great point that you feel that time now with different things sure you get a

dog bowl you fill that bowl with food you get a girl you hold her head and me well one girl particular yeah you try to get her you try to get her to eat out of that dog bowl guess who i saw at silver lake uh in silver lake at la mill coffee who is that la mill or la meal i say la mill but i think it's ellie mille what i say what did you see zack delarocha oh i've seen sitting at a table i've seen him raging against the machine the lead singer i saw him i don't like that brown i saw him uh that's fine what are you what are you audio slave what's your deal negative 80s what do you like 80s i'm stuck in the 80s raging against the machines and you've seen him before too does he live in our neighborhood no i saw him in san amonica the restaurant two weeks

ago i'm gonna find him you did you didn't tell me that luckily i didn't think you'd give a shit like you didn't today when we just told you just now these things in your life you don't you know you gotta share no you just proved it you just proved you don't want to hear that kind of shit you like i don't like him yeah but i don't like their music i made it i don't like the loud records that they make my my replay of it made you way bitchier yeah i know you're so mean wait do you like rage against i don't know about them no i don't how did you know it was him because i just knew he's a celebrity i've seen i've seen tom what's his name mariello i've seen him around too tom who mariello the guitar player i would love to meet any of those people look this is what

happened when i saw this is what happened when i saw okay i was sitting here he was sitting at the table here i go uh i stack from uh richard's machine i'm gonna go fuck hey can i get a wow turkey sandwich like that wow wait and let me ask you this did you turn and do hey let me get a turkey sandwich and they're the waiter hadn't come over yet like you're kind of practicing yeah i was practicing yeah that's exactly like i was practicing for conversation i was like when he gets here i'm gonna go i'm gonna be so ready turkey we're turkey wait what celebrity do you just not like not like who rubs you the wrong way is there anybody that you'd be like ah i don't know if anybody i mean i'm sure there is but i have to

you have to kind of put them in front of me to you know i mean like you have to suggest people until i go oh i don't have anybody living i have one go ahead go ahead you know what i mean but you didn't really have to top your head did you no you kind of had to think about it i think that i think that's because we're normal people right you don't need to know me like say who do i hate all the time and i just can't stop thinking about yeah yeah well we'll tell you like that on somebody with his something's weird yeah i feel like there should only be a few things in your life that you can definitively jump right to it if someone says favorite movie favorite band yeah but even you know when someone goes who are your favorite comics you know how you kind of blink yeah and you're

like oh who do i like it's because you're like i guess i don't really think about this all the time on both scales you're always in the middle like a couple things that's a normal way to be i think i think so yeah do you have a favorite movie back to the future that's your favorite yeah yeah well that's why you love that cold play yeah when they came out to back to the future that was really excited about that yeah yeah and then you have a favorite band tool that's your favorite band really tool well that's good are they like um industrial are they considered progressive rock used to be like hardcore uh they're metal but i to me it just doesn't feel like it's heavy metal even though i guess that is probably what they do get categorized i like people that like things

i like that you're that you have things that you like no because everybody's yeah i do too i hate people they're like man but they like but they genuinely like yeah that's a good sign tool and pink floyd are my two favorite really pink floyd just recently became have you seen like roger waters in concert i said i last year i went twice to see roger waters the wall it's the greatest show i've ever seen it's my favorite one you should go you should go see it did you shave your eyebrows to go see it i did well i did the whole thing did you get high so i have to go here's the thing i went to the la i went to the staple center to see it and i ate a very strong pop brownie and i didn't and this is when i was just getting into pink void i bought the tickets

just because i was like yeah oh someone told me the show's amazing i feel like we should go because i don't know if we'll get a chance to go again yeah we had just moved here me and jordan and so i bought tickets so i didn't really know the album i knew all the singles yeah so i didn't know what i was getting into it's an epic show like the visuals that the meaning of the songs that he's changed now to go with the current times we live in it's a very like 1980s for the like live music concert at staple center i freaked out halfway through i had to go sit out in the lobby because i the pot brownie was way too strong drinking coke trying to come down listening to music i'd peer back in i'd walk i'm like i didn't know i was going to get this

stimulated so i bought it i bought tickets to go again to anaheim the very next week because i said this that's the greatest education in entertainment i've ever gotten really that's how that's every band should care to have that much meaning in their art wow it was it's an epic show we're going again that i would like to see a main 19th go are there still tickets there's definitely still tickets because the wall for me as an adolescent i was a very upset depressive adolescent i would watch that on a loop yeah much and uh relate completely to the character and the meaning of the wall and uh the album is fantastic i don't know if i might break down emotionally so you know the grown up it's a it's expensive yeah drop the money i mean this

drop the money and pay for the very expensive seats and go see this show it you oh stop it i'm going to commit suicide well this is dark side of the man it's true this isn't the wall this is probably my favorite pink floyd song i love this song you want to go i would can i tell you what i like off the wall i'm again you seriously have to go saturday may 19th i'm not i'm gonna go with worry yeah if i had an extra ticket i would bring you i'm not i'm not joking i want you to see it that bad does Jordan love them it turns out i say it's my favorite but i don't know the words and us and them with them and them and us my favorite song could you imagine this this band coming out now and people being like what the fuck epic fail yeah i know the patience

required for pink floyd can you put that song um hello hello is there anybody in there there'll be comfortably numb oh that one makes me cry comfortably numb yeah there is no gorgeous is gorgeous oh what does jordan love them to say what i'm gonna do right now i'm gonna fucking show you a video does she does your girlfriend love them is your fiance she went to that concert with me and i was like look i'm buying tickets we're going in she was like i'm in that's the best this is the best this is so emotional what a piece of art but this show you will go like the album is epic yeah it's amazing but the live show you know that do you know what the live show is no is it like a wall they're building the wall the whole first half of

the show and the wall is also a projection screen so they're adding to the projection screen so at some point are you on video yeah don't look at it let me find a good video for you okay you're not looking at the concert are you yeah it's the concert oh i want to show it to you i want to pick something awesome makes me want to shape my eyebrows and get weird you know wait you still have dark side going there's too much happening there's too much happening okay but they they're building the the wall right but because it's a projection screen at one point this is when i really freaked out there's outlines so it looks like bricks okay but then some of the bricks started disappearing that i thought were there and i was like oh this is

too fucking trippy it's just a projection screen but as they're putting it in you're like oh it's a brick and then just disappears yeah and you knew it was just there yeah but the effects of it look insane um i really like remember when i ate that that oh that pot pops say no more say no more you know we've been meaning to discuss this on the podcast for months and we keep forgetting so one time are these lollipops i got from a makeup girl one of the makeup artists that did my makeup on a tv show she gave me these lollipops and i didn't eat them because i was kind of afraid of them i'm afraid of edibles i smoke only what i know yeah but you i do have a pot card yeah i believe in it um but you you ate an entire lollipop one night and i was sleeping

and it was like three in the morning yeah and i get up because i noticed you're not in bed anymore and i go out in the living room and it's pitch black and you are just walking back and forth your pacing and it's dark and i was like tell me what are you doing and what did you say to me getting a glass of water i'm getting but it was pitch black and you were just pacing in our living room in the dark because of a lollipop yeah what did that feel like what were you okay hold on i'm watching a clip roaring this is the second half of the show you can we do this after the podcast can we do this after the podcast it's going off the rails on a crazy train yeah i do want to see that yeah i was really fucking out of my mind you were i've done tincture and i flipped hold your

microphone i've done tincture i flipped out has no idea how this works i've never done this um we gotta let's let's um yeah let's uh let's do this so we can wrap this up um wait but that lollipop so what what happened to you then well what were you going through that you couldn't control your thoughts uh i couldn't my thoughts were not the speed of the thoughts were too fast they were too fast there were too many so you felt disconnected and i also felt like there's no way i could lay down because it was like racing thoughts yeah and um you become antsy i started to write things down like every thought i was writing them down and then i i just was the yeah the mind it's like your mind going a hundred miles an hour it's the worst yeah it was way too much and he was just literally

in the dark in this house in this living room just pacing it was like two o'clock in the morning it was so late and i'm like babe what are you doing he's like i'm getting a glass of water i i did a lot of tincture one night what's that it's like the droplets that you do on your tongue yeah pot of thc oh yeah so i was doing it and it wasn't really affecting me so i did like a bunch of them and uh i was also smoking yeah i was also smoking we ate dinner i was drinking wine we went to bed nothing was happening we passed out i passed out went to bed woke up at 4 a.m like i went from like being asleep to i'm awake i'm completely awake like heart racing it all kicked in at one time and i was pacing around the bedroom i woke uh jordan up i was like i'm so sorry i was like i think you

should call in sick to work because i need you to stay awake with me right now i was like i'm freaking out and i went to the bathroom we had a guest staying in our living room on an air mattress so i couldn't go in the living room i was trapped in the bathroom in our bedroom and i was just freaking out pacing just like you were talking about it lasted for about uh an hour i went to the bathroom i took a colonna pen it's like an anti-stress pill and after it was the whole time i was so impatient i was like when the fuck is this going to kick in and we laid in bed and jordan was like all right just let's just like do these deep breaths which always helps you like your breathing is everything so as soon as like the colonna man kicked in i was doing the breathing i like

just passed out and i woke up the next day and i just felt horrible because she had to call in sick she didn't get any sleep oh yeah what a great woman though she knows exactly how to talk to you i was freaking out i didn't know how to talk you down that night i know i the thing is i didn't want to be talked down though you know i'm saying it doesn't help yeah i didn't i wanted to be alone and just like pace and like because it it uh it now you're adding thoughts to thoughts you already can't control yeah exactly i also had one time where i got a a giant pot cookie from a guy and then i worked with and i was like how much do i take he was like just take it eat the whole thing oh really it was like i instinctively took half and i didn't feel anything i didn't know much

about edibles then yeah you don't know that takes a while yeah and so i then i ended up eating the whole thing he said eat the whole thing and an hour later i was crying like like just just tears worst time ever the worst experience of my life yeah and just sitting in bed like there's like in my old uh the place i lived with brian and brian yeah it was just yeah i've always uh looked at it like this when you smoke uh hard stuff or you go you smoke too much or you eat too much like that pot has a different type of hangover you have to deal with all the pain immediately yeah and you'll feel better tomorrow right drinking is like you can have fun now you don't remember anything and you'll deal with it tomorrow sometimes so there is this thing that happens when you eat at least

for me where you'll see things very clearly that are in like your denial box it's that'll you said that to me when we were driving from atlanta dashville yeah we talked about freaking out on pot that's right and you said sometimes you got there's stuff you're supposed to deal with i think so i agree it's a vision quest it kind of is and you kind of go like um you'll you'll you'll just be like oh it's something that you've thought about a lot but that you don't like face a lot you know and you just kind of subconscious yeah your subconscious kind of comes to the forefront like i think it's your general i for me anyways i think when it happens it's my general uh stress it's like you why do you stress about anything really yeah like try to have that like Buddhist

approach of like well what are you stressed about what what is any of this anyways yeah yeah yeah that's a good thought um thank you i always get the answers to what i seek when i smoke pot yeah i go into vision quest and i think about things that bother me yeah and then i'll find that the answer comes to me so clearly and then i'll feel better you know what i think it's because you don't let outside influence you just you deal with it in your own brain i think that's what pot does i think sometimes we don't ever find that sometimes with drinking not that we don't find it with drinking sometimes but with drinking then we become like very compatible and i open up to you yeah but i'm really just getting your answer to my problem yeah you know what i mean yeah

and it doesn't necessarily work you know the thing that works for you doesn't necessarily work for other bottom pot you don't want to you you're like look i can get it i can get it myself shrooms to me are the the epitome of that i mean not just like your own personal stuff your whole perception of your entire existence you can be like oh this is all actually very easy to understand have never done that shit it's it's incredible there's no it to me it's not like like i have a fear of acid next to me i've never done them i don't have this desire to do them but mushrooms i was afraid to do them and i did them and it was like that eye-opening thing of like oh these aren't what i thought they were i had this fear that i was going to go to this place

but it takes you if you do the right amount and in the right conditions it takes you to the most blissful place ever where you don't feel like you're just on a drug having fun you feel like you're getting somewhere you feel like you're learning something i love mushrooms i i did a lot of acid it's great yeah a lot of mushrooms but at least it allows you to get outside of your consciousness and look at it it's like a third party yeah that makes sense third eye yeah the point is guys do those drugs do drugs do those drugs on amazon.com but go through your mom's house podcast it's it's that time so it's would you rather time and uh this one i got from a listener while i was in newport gentucky he came up to me and he's like i have a would you rather for you

and he said would you rather have um dad breath forever you know a dad breath immediately yeah dad breath all the time or have a runny nose that's persistent all the time dad breath easy i i disagree i said i said runny nose easy i can't handle runny nose it gets raw dad breath is like the grossest thing ever but you you end up getting used to it so i mean it's gross for other people he won't and your lady will never get used to it i'm fine with that runny nose all the time the it the your your nose is just raw yeah but you can put a spread dad breath is at least other people's problem that's actually true i know but it isolates you from your community from your loved one i will never want to love you when you have dad breath

well let me ask you this yeah you're just better always you so you're like oh he's clearly diseased can i tell you i had a boyfriend that used to have sinus problems and i just name dropping show off you just get used to it you're like oh that guy just snots he has constant sinus problems yeah really god bless him sweetest guy on the planet did you date for a long time yeah my first boyfriend ever but he always had snot things and you just get used to that but dad breath is like dad breath that's wrought from deep inside how's your dad's breath it's not bad actually it's not bad maybe that's what influenced me to take it really why do we have this assumption that all dads have bad breath there's a lot of them do

my dad was big on listerine really yeah i think he was not at all wait a minute but that disproves now that i look back when it comes from deep within dad it does i don't think i think it's you know what i think it's pretty bad and the thing is that like i if i know like you're gonna be like so disgusted with me i think i might have to take the snot even though i fucking hate having snot you can spray you can put the spray in and no but you can chew gum you don't get to fix you can do listerine taps the scenario in would you rather you don't get to read you know yeah yeah you don't get to see you know no no no that's wrong that's flawed or what's what's flawed the thing is either you live with dad breath or you live with it right i'm saying you don't get to meaning that's the

beginning of the premise and then you can live any way you want to with the premise so i can alter that premise that's not a part of it i can i can alter it with your plan game wrong yeah i think you're playing the game right you don't just be like so then i blew my nose now i don't have running that way i accept the premise vitamins were cool oh wow what is this i don't know it's the fucking ads i don't know but i liked it and into with vitamins are cool i feel like you guys are trying to do some bliminal messaging to your listeners that's not how you play the game vitamins that's how i play the game that's what's so wack man what are you talking about well then well then i'll take dad breath and i'll just always have alt oids uh going see now it doesn't

even work but it never covers dad breath yeah it does dad breath is from deep within you're making a mockery of which you rather thank you thank you with your i'm so good rudy you're absolutely rudy in this video you're listening to job so good hey now okay here's another would you rather like rush limbaugh was it from uh rush yeah tom langus remember him oh yeah dump that bitch you gotta dump that bitch oh man that i just did tot glasses podcast last night and i've was talked about then really yeah really that's great remember him here's the thing pal you gotta dump that bitch that bitch i tell bitches this i'm with tens every night pal vitamins i'm with tens he's never with tens tom langus no uh never do you think he was ever

with tens i don't think i know him you know what do you mean who's tom langus really do you care he was a guy yeah he had a syndicated talk show and he was a sexist pig and he would always give advice to single guys like if you want to date a lady take her out for coffee don't spend money on her and then bang that bitch and dump her i like it yeah it was like the worst i want to hear that for human beings ever here's a would you rather from our listener oliver oliver portland portland would you rather wear underwear made out of killer bees for one hour killer or killer bees or wear a gas mask connected to a tank full of dead fish for one year well the killer bees are gonna kill you you're gonna die should we uh can we can we change his to just bees yes it has to be changed

otherwise it's useless it's death change it to bees one hour with the bees versus oh so your your ass your balls your taint your ding dong they're all gonna get stung all right we don't know that i'm a peaceful person maybe i'll just stand completely still for one hour no no they'll get you you don't know that i want them to get you all right so let's say you will get stung you're getting stung i'd still take it i think over smelling dead fish for a year a year a year if you change it to equal an hour then yeah or maybe even a little more like a day but no a year is just too long a year so stressful a year ruins what about you you get your clam stung by and your ass your panini my panini is stung by do you want some panini said me lacunas i love that you're

making a squeezing motion i don't understand it it's like a dick really know oh you're trying to do you care really which would you do all right i have a phobia of bees and being stung by them but a year a year long too long awful i would go for the hour of bee stings on my couter and my anus my my mila anus as opposed to uh yeah i mean that's it's just the time then next collar one hour of torture versus a year of like torture yeah oh why don't we do it and also you're always just wearing a gas mask uh for a year how do you put the pants on with the bees is the end of who that's gonna irritate them that's gonna irritate the shit that's why you're getting stung well no because you're only doing it for an hour yeah yeah you can go naked for an

sure you can oh i hate but a year you got to go walk around you got a fish thing would you rather have balls that hang from your chin or a five inch tail that wags every time you get excited is there a time limit on this or just it doesn't it you're gonna you rest your life yeah indefinite i mean you could probably play up the tail thing as being kind of a cool party evolved yeah you're evolved or or like it's just like like hey you've seen rory the guy with the tail is pretty good well okay i will tell you i know somebody that has a tailbone exposed like part of their tailbone exposed that's a real thing it peeks through their skin so that's that's a thing and i have like a bump on my back that looks like a dock tail like a cocker span tail yeah so i'm not

so judgy on the tail you have three buttholes no but how long is this tail this you have three buttholes i do have three and it says yeah what is that like uh what's that like uh well here's my question how long is the tail it's uh five inches i want a tail i kind of want a tail for fun sitting down this is five inches is sitting down bad so oh you have a little dick oh you have a little dick no this is five inches and your dick is seven inches no you added way too much that's now 20 inches 20 inches wait can mine curl can you sit down i want mine to curl like a pug or like a pig like a pig tail yeah that's how i envisioned it let's see yeah you can sit down it just kind of it comes behind you you know it goes it goes up what do you think i think i would

go with the tail over balls on your chin fuck that big balls hanging off your chin that's like that character in pirate to the caribbean there's one that looks like he has balls on she i don't want to that's not a good look oh i know who you're talking about the guy who has balls on his chin i would take balls on my chin you would that works how come that looks cool it does not look cool can i grow a beard that was from uh from josh thanks rott josh um thank you josh um you're welcome that's josh's voice josh go ahead and uh tweet at me if you felt like i accurately did for you this is how i try to get people tweeting anything to me really good rory hit really good well okay here's the last one would you rather get a hand job from your mom

or jerk off your dad that's a great would you damn that's a great would you rather that's how you play the game i think that's an easy one but i think it's great that is uh from adam is that easy i think it's easy how well you could either have to pleasure someone or just get pleasure with your eyes closed to completion is it to completion yeah of course you might not be able to wait is it different for the girl is an element different for the girl no it's jerk your dad your dad's got a finger you until completion and you've got to finger your mom yeah or jerk off my dad yeah oh so it's also jerk off your dad so your mom fingers you or is it reversed i see what you're saying i see what you're saying you're reversed for the sex is the same sex is yeah yeah this is

excellent this is how you play the game adam you get deep into adam you win adam that's why your third on the would you rather and uh and you can send your your would you rather to your mom's podcast at gmail.com i hate it for the i think actually you know what no because it's asking it has the mom dad scenario is the general question it's saying you get a hand job from your mom so it's very specific right or got you i got you i got you what would you do i can't i can't wrap my head around you're not supposed to i can't i can't well that bobby mcfaren sink into your thoughts and go with what feels right i haven't i can't even begin what do you think what's your logic oh definitely it's definitely uh jerk off my dad is it absolutely definitely why is that

why is that so i can't why is that obvious yeah it's not to me because it's it's more tolerable the the like the father like a dad thing than like having uh your like the mothers are too sacred i think for for their sons so like the idea that there would be anything like a sexual there i mean it's obviously repulsive in either way but i couldn't even begin so i like my dad i could be like dad he'd be like that's okay buddy i know what you gotta do like you gotta get this would you rather this is there no i know you feel about this game it's for the podcast i think i want it for the show you think i want it either it's okay buddy just keep doing it's round play this is this really is a great would you rather i know there's no right answer it's

give it should give you points sometimes people do would you rather and there is like a right answer this it should always be zen like i mean but do you understand what i'm saying when i totally say like you like you gotta take i get it i think i just merely go with getting pleasure to over the awkwardness for some reason i feel like psychologically i could somehow get over it yeah i disagree completely if i just closed my eyes it was like no completely because the onus of pleasure is on you if someone jerks you off you have to succumb to your guilt you have to let go of your guilt and your shame and then have an ejection oh you know what actually actually that's a good point like now we're gonna go to another level of it like you're just getting a

hand jab does it have to come to completion yeah but here's the thing here's the thing doesn't it well here's the element if it's something where you just couldn't because of the particular dynamic is there someone there with a gun who like you have to get off so you have to try to make it pleasurable i think in the end or it's just no this is the perfect way you rather the perfect way we're in the end what you're looking for is that uh oh shit i'm sorry he added a part of this for you fantastic addendum i love it so i guess in christina's case would you rather finger blast your mom to climax or jerk off your dad no no because now she's just pleasuring both oh wait you're right one includes you did he write that right he wrote this i think he wrote it wrong

right he's one of them you should be receiving in the other way let's say my mother finger blasts me or i jerk off my dad yeah okay well then that's almost the same so i think it's your dad fingers you and then you got to finger your mom that's what i tried to say earlier you mix the sex i got you mix the sexes yeah hmm does that change the dynamic for you yeah i know it does because getting a woman off is i think harder than a guy not for me yeah boom boom fireworks hmm i kind of wish there was an option i could just jerk my dad off because then males are easier than women i don't know if i'm right but i feel like dudes it's more of a physical i think it's it's less it's less about what effort is involved as much as which is tolerable uh no i'm aware

i've already moved once that past like what's tolerable to me is not accepting the responsibility of the pleasure i got you i could never get over my shame and guilt to accept an orgasm from my parent so giving one how gray would morning radio be if they if they had no limits if they could just do this i know i would have to give pleasure and put the onus of the guilt on the parent that's what i'm you'd have to give i i totally get her but that's what i'm saying i give pleasure to relinquish the guilt so you give a hands up to your dad i guess so we let's we're saying we agreed on this though well no i'm still on the other he's on the opposite side you would see the place hand jobs a hand job dude pussy's pussy i don't give fuck do you take a

hand job from your mother it's so awful it's so this is the best i mean i mean this is it's such a great would you rather because there's to me it's all i mean obviously it's all losing but yeah of course yeah but but i'm terrible i just can't i totally get your point on that being like the least amount of losing but i just don't know if i could live with jerking off my dad i i feel like that's something i can't close my eyes and make go away but the other one i feel like somehow i could no in the end here's a thing when it's good you're coming on one of your parents oh wait why was that because you're having your orgasm yes or you could just be standing like maybe they're standing beside you no you don't be coming on them your hand you know who knows who really knows

remember that the would you rather of all would you rather is the christmas morning scenario i'm curious to see what rory's well first let's let's tell the i want a john who runs the facebook the facebook page the fan page yeah please put up the poll we have i was saying something but please put up the poll for this particular would you rather which is um would you rather uh receive a handjob from your mother or would you rather jerk off your dad which and for and for girls and make just keep it blanket all right across the board one um and then uh yeah well what she was talking about is the original uh like would you rather that gave everybody something to think about yeah was um was uh it's christmas morning

you're with uh you're with jordan you're with your family and her family uh your brothers and sisters family christmas yes you're all together brothers and sisters nephews nieces yes grandparents everybody's there and you're about to open christmas presents and you have to go hey wait a minute before we open presents i got something to show you guys and you gather everybody together in the living room and you put on a dvd and the dvd is either would you rather it be you are getting uh there's 10 homeless women who masturbate and they they they like they shoot they squirt into your face like your open mouth and they and they have like screaming orgasms like that like that like that kind where it's like it's really aggressive and they and they're

homeless and they like they have no tea right or or you you look into camera it's like a mid shot and you masturbate to completion looking into camera and your family and then you go time to open the presents i think uh i think the me looking into the camera you would okay okay what's your rationale why why is that why that's interesting interesting i don't know because i feel like maybe if the entire family's gonna sit there and judge me they all have to go well we've all done that wow that's interesting but the other one they go Jesus Christ he's into some interesting the other one feels like maybe if i really am into it maybe it's too revealing see that's the one who chooses masturbation references empathy they assume that the family

member has empathy for what they're doing and therefore the guilt and the shame is off of them because she chose the homeless women she was for all the men guys bukkocking me ten guys shooting loads in her face she says that i think maybe you just want them like maybe the whole scenario actually is excited you know we've talked about this but to me but to me that takes the coming up that would take the blame off of me and my family go oh poor christina had ten guys bukkocking her dimsand instead of taking the responsibility of masturbating you always go to responsibility i know it's so weird on this yeah i think it's all just personality i mean i think i could probably be like i was jerking off so they okay i guess the i guess the one element that kind of can

mess with all the answers is that the family members will never get to know what the alternative could have been that's true like it's easy for me to go hey we've all done that but they also don't have to go oh the other thing was that they just go well where are we fucking watching this you also have to forget when you finish you have to go merry christmas grandma oh you added that in mary why would have said that anyways at some point during the day that's sure it's true it's a merry christmas here's your president okay well that was a fun wow fun day man i enjoyed you guys having you here thank you for doing this thank you just to revisit it will you uh tell our listeners again where you're

gonna be next are you uh when do you when do you guys post these well the video is obviously live this one will go up tomorrow well if you're listening live right now my half hour special comes on friday may 11th comedy central that's this friday this friday well i think it's good to say it at the end i think all right comedy central may 11th this friday at 11 p.m eastern central this is gonna be really exciting i'm excited i'm excited i'm nervous that's awesome i was gonna be great it's out of my hands we'll see what happens it's gonna be great it's gonna be great though um we support you it's gonna be fantastic what's this calling uh steven spielmer i think steven spielbert might be so please tune in wow tune in to uh come in central comedy

central this friday for rory scovilles half hour special to kick off the season of the half hours awesome yeah yeah yeah so everybody knows okay watch that check that out and tina you will be this weekend denver improv uh may 10th through 13th come see me please come see me it's it makes my week so much better when there are mommies there believe me yeah i love it too i will hug every one of you part bird i'm coming to see you this weekend louisville next week thank you guys for tuning in thanks guys it was so nice to see you on you stream go to your mom's house podcast.com and uh check out the new evolved super mommy pack has become the highest tightest jeans bundle there's a little bit of uh there's a change in the in the product there so that's why we renamed it

i want to thank um tea chess yes or tea adjustment i don't know how to pronounce your name aging punk 101 on twitter thank you for my pixie shirt oh yeah and thanks and thank you for the fart book yes really exciting we've been playing with it non-stop it's really awesome i really do appreciate our hours thank you so much you have the best listeners we love you guys thank you so much for supporting have a great day wax super elastic bubble