Your Stupid Opinions - Burning Bus Tour, Unsteady Sex Stool, Mud Butt Burgers

Episode Date: November 11, 2024

More reviews & complaints!! This week, we hear all about a bus tour of Los Angeles that may leave you outside in the sun, or running for your life, from the flames. A down south fast food chain that makes you wait in the rain, only for you to end up with "mud butt". A very personal item that may leave you no longer in the mood, once you're done with the construction project!!Join comedians James Pietragallo and Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section!Subscribe and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!!!Don't forget to rate & review!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery plus subscribers can listen to your stupid opinions ad free right now join Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts Hello everybody, welcome back to Your Stupid Opinions. Hey! Hello there, my name is James Petragallo, I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wissman. We are jacked and excited as usual today to get into other people's complaints because damn it, what do we like more than people's complaints, founded or unfounded. If you knew our conversation before the show, you'd understand why we're laughing. But yeah, we have had it with people's opinions completely.

Oh my God. And so we are going to absolutely have a ball this week. Eviscerate these people for their fuck if we're having the balls and the unmitigated gall to think their opinion out into fucking letters and digital form send it into the world press enter out there just put it out like a paper airplane you threw out of the window there you go click submit you son of a bitch definitely follow us on social media and listen to our other two shows,

Crime and Sports and Small Town Murder, which are, guess what, exactly what they goddamn sound like. So that said, let's get right into this, everybody. There we go. We're done with all the Halloween stuff. We're done with the psychopath idiot. And we're gonna head on down. He's so mad.

He's so mad. That guy's so angry. It seems like he may have heard the show I don't know but he's I don't know if it's that or just Halloween just ended so he's been dealing with He's gonna deal with his rash of shit for the year. Yeah, but man Somebody did review or comment somewhere and let him know that just so you know some fellas discussed you We got bullshit. We got a message from someone who said they worked there also and they have some stories as well. I'm like oh boy oh boy

we need to make like a separate series of just psychopath stories, horror stories. Well your stupid opinions, wild accusations about a guy who runs a haunt. He runs a haunt. He's had accusations against him before. Yeah. Here's some unfounded ones that people have just told us. Here's some ones that have no proof, but let's talk about them anyway. Because that's what the show is, these people. We don't know if this shit actually happened. We don't even know if they did this.

No. Somebody said, I asked for a large Coke. They gave me a medium. We don't know if that's true. We have no goddamn idea. Can't tell you. I waited 15 minutes. Was it really 15 minutes? We don't know.

So let's get into this. We're going down to Alabama. Okay. And we're going to a Checkers restaurant in Alabama. Not the auto parts store. Not the auto parts store. That doesn't even exist anymore, does it? I don't know.

I honestly don't know. I think Checker Auto was bought by O'Reilly and also Advanced Auto Parts. I think that's what it is now. Okay, that makes sense. I'm trying to what it is now. I think that's true. I'm trying to picture like in Phoenix, the different auto parts stores. Because it used to be Checker and AutoZone

and Checker doesn't exist anymore. It's O'Reilly and AutoZone. Yeah, it's O'Reilly now, so I guess they did buy them. So they didn't buy the hamburgers here though. No, they did not. Checkers is Raleigh's too, right? It looks, yes, it's exactly like Raleigh's. Same thing.

Yeah, it's like Hardee's and, what's the other one? Oh, Carter Burger? No. Oh, Carl's Jr. Carl's Jr. and Hardee's, I think, are like the same thing. I think that's true. Yeah, they have the same logo, the same, is it Hardee's, which one is it?

Hardee's is letters. Yeah, but Hardee's and somebody else are, I don't know, I think that's true, but I don't know what it is. Yeah, it's like they're different regional things. Oh, okay, so Hardee's might be where they're at, and then Carl's Jr. is where Hardee's is not at. Yes, because they have the same dishes,

like the same sandwiches too there. Okay. You know what I mean, they're the same thing. Checkers and Raleigh, same thing. And I fucking love Raleigh's, by the way. Their fries were, as a kid, I loved them. Oh my God! Their fries are ridiculous.

They're like, I don't know what, old grease, cakes on top. They don't clean it. They don like, I don't know what, old grease caked on top. They don't clean it. They don't come out like a smooth french fry. There's like chunks of shit on them. That makes them delicious. It's just dried grease. Several of them just welded together. It's like, alright, well, here's several of them. That's the key to Raleigh's fries. Never clean the fryer and they come out amazing. Sure, you might get a piece of a mouse or something in there every once in a while, but I'm telling you it's worth it for these fries. They're welded together and they taste great.

They're emulsified. Give me a big Buford and some fries and I am in. I love that shit. They're emulsified. So this Checkers is a chain eatery serving fast food classics like burgers, hot dogs, french fries and shakes. A hamburger stand place. Their shakes are legit too. Fucking really good shakes.

This is at 1965 Dauphin Island Parkway in Mobile, Alabama. So do they gear this thing kind of like an old 50s? Yes, yeah. Oh, I can show you the picture. Yeah, that's been, Checkers has like the black and white checks with the red one in there every once in a while. And they'll have like a car show there on Friday nights. Not even a car show.

It's not a sanctioned car show. No, no, no. Just old guys showing up. Dickheads with 57. Old guys showing up with their 67 Monte Carlo. That's all it is. With a Bud Light and a Stanley Cup. There's a Dunkin' Donuts by me that just every night,

just guys stand there and just show up and stand there next to their cars. There's a little car show every single night in this Dunkin' Donuts parking lot. And it's been going on since I was a kid and lived here. It's like decades, their dads were there with their cars. It's incredible. Now they're standing out there with their Subaru.

I do love those cars. Those cars are the coolest though. Nobody's there for a trophy. They're just there to. They just stand there. And talk about motors. And it's the same 10 people that were there last week. You know the guy's car, what are we doing?

Did you get a new car? No, same one. Same one. So this checkers here, 3.5 stars out of 673 reviews. So it's been reviewed quite a bit here and we will get, it closes at 1 a.m. By the way. Oh, yeah Let's start out with Jenna with five stars Okay, cuz it's got to be good if it's still there and spin their time was craving a milkshake

And I love all caps mixing their banana and chocolate shakes to make one big chocolate covered banana shake Okay, that's probably good. I mean it's pretty tasty Yeah, but do those flavors mix or do they like, does one dominate the other? Chocolate and banana go together. I mean, chocolate covered bananas are good. But yeah, if it's too much chocolate, then there's no banana in the mix. And if it's too much banana, then you're not getting the chocolate. The place was super busy when I came through, but the young lady who took my order was extremely

polite and had great manners. I explained what I wanted and she even said, man, that sounds so good. I'm going to crack one of those for me too. Hold on. I just smoked a joint in the walk-in. That sounds amazing. I'm going to take my 15 right now. I'm going to hand you off to somebody else. I'm going to make me one of those. Good luck to you, sir. Have a good one. That sounds so good. She made pleasant small talk as my shake was made by her coworker, a young man who also had excellent manners.

Yeah. Well-mannered. He said, you're right. That's good. I said, that's good. I'll tell you something. I never had bad service there ever, but this particular visit really stood out just because the genuine sweetness of the kids working there. Sweetness matters and sweetness and oh boy. Stay away from those children. Yeah, they're just so sweet. God, gross.

I like to lick them and they're just sweet tasting too. They act sweet, they taste sweet. Right there between their neck and the shoulder. You know, they'll go, what was that? And you go, I think a bug landed on you. They don't know what that happened. They didn't see it. You can get away with that one.

Haley gives one star. Not so happy here. I've never had such an unpleasant experience at a fast food restaurant. They weren't so sweet to her. Dude, how many times have you eaten fast food in your life? A thousand, a million, what? 10,000? I don't even know.

It's gotta be. I don't know how many meals I've eaten, but it's probably 40% of that. That's what I'm saying. To have the most unpleasant experience I ever have had at a fast food restaurant now, they'd have to shoot me in the face because I've got horrible food poisoning,

fucking upside down buns, people, food. I mean, horrible experiences. I can't imagine. Food missing. Missing. Wrong. Covered in mayonnaise. Fucking Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Rude people. Assholes. Online for a half hour. Like they would literally have to come out and kick me in the balls for it to be the worst experience. The amount of times I've been taken advantage of by a fast food restaurant Oh, damn it by that I had Taco Bell I had door-taco Bell last night

No Because Sarah was out of town and I had to work and I had all this shit going on so I had that it was The best Taco Bell I've had in 10 years. It was hot all of the what hot all of the tacos We're still crispy. None of the bottoms were falling out You know normally fuck did they do that? I don't fucking know what this guy did He had like his car was like a brim brim brim had a lot of like fucking exhaust going on, too I think he drove here at 110 miles an hour. I really do. Is the only explanation I come up with Did he just get the fixins and then make them in your driveway?

I feel like he prepared the taco. I got a taco supreme. Fucking sour cream too and they're crispy. I don't know how he did it. This guy's my hero. That's magic. Fuck, I want his card. Can you be my personal door dash driver?

I'll give you all the tips. You have no idea. It's hard to get that walking it from the counter to a table. That's what I, all this shit was freshly made. I was like, this is incredible. I couldn't believe it. So anyway, my elderly father was just yelled at by the employee for not knowing what he wanted

when he tried ordering. When he tried ordering three things and all three things, they were either out of ingredients or it would take them 20 minutes to make. It's a hamburger stand. How is that fast food? That's what I'm doing. That doesn't make any sense. Yeah. A sit down. I have 20 minutes is too long at Denny's. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm going, what the fuck are we doing here? That's absurd. We ended up leaving and not getting anything because I'm not going to support somewhere that treats people in such a disrespectful manner. Sure.

One star. Okay. And that got one thumbs up. Maybe from her dad. We're not sure. Yeah. Sean one star. It took 20 minutes to get a shake and an ice cream cone.

That's excessive. That's too long. Yeah. That's too long. The staff member was on her cell phone the entire time. Well, there's why. I think we found a solution here. I think we found the answer to the riddle. Well there's why. I think we found a solution here. I think we

found the answer to the riddle. She was making a TikTok. Of making a milkshake and she's like oh fuck that one. That one didn't come out right let me do it again. That's what the problem is. Take six hold on no dude it's almost ready wait I gotta finish this. Shit um the shake oh yeah the cell phone okay the shake was definitely not what we had at checkers before the dog ate the ice cream cone with no complaint with no complaint It's a fucking dog it eats shit with no complaint My dog sees turkey shit runs at it like it's a fucking filet mignon What are you talking about my dog eats shit out of the litter box? Come on give a fuck without his litter, but does he complain about it? That's no questions. You're no complaints

He goes back for more this all checks out Dust it off or anything Not that not the excess litter off it. Grab it with his teeth and bop it against the wall, nothing. Pick it up, drop it, pick it up, drop it again. He's basically just a cat shit relocator because he eats it and then goes and shits litter and cat shit all over my backyard. I'll put this outside later. I got this later, don't worry, I'll take this out. The general manager may want to look into finding a new job. It has to be embarrassing to be connected

to this particular establishment. Embarrassing. Bobby. Any fast food joint being the manager is embarrassing. Yeah, you're not thrilled about that. He's not thrilled. No, if he's over 30, he's like, I could do better, probably.

I probably should have worked harder somewhere. If he's 24, he's over 30 is like I could do better. Probably. I probably should have worked harder So if he's 24, he's like, okay. Yeah, I'm doing great. This is great in the fry cook I cook I got my own fucking studio apartment. This is fantastic Impressed with my central I eat checkers three times a day. I'm doing great Bobby one star as I stood in line for ten minutes, they wouldn't even look at me and take an order. I was the only one at the pickup line and felt very disrespected as I walked away. Then they asked if I want to order.

They knew exactly what they was doing. They knew exactly what they was doing. Yeah, alienating me. August 15th, 2023, time was 10.08 PM. Oh he's got a time stamp on this bitch. Search the fucking cameras. Check the security tapes. Ashley one star. I was served old food that was cooked hours prior bit down into fish sandwich damn near chip my tooth. Hours earlier fish sandwich. I don't think that's healthy. I don't know. I'm not buying that. That's not good. Yeah, I'm thinking

this is on you probably. Yeah, you should have known that. You should have thrown that right in the garbage. Tried calling. Took it home. Took it home, tried calling. There's your problem. No one answered. After calling several times. I gave up. Will not be purchasing here. No more. Don't answer that fish lady. No, we gave out a, like a real old fish sandwich. Like normally it's, you know, a little bit. We give it 10 15. This is like, I made it like yesterday. It's fucking bad. She's going to call. I found it behind the fryer. I just stuck it back in the thing. So it's don't answer. behind the fryer. I just stuck it back in the thing. So it's don't answer.

Anybody calls tonight. Phones off the hook everyone and they're off. Okay. We'll not be purchasing here. No more. All right. No more. No more. Courtney one star. Very rude. I got to the window and added to my order. There was a female with dreads in the background saying, next time, do that back there, referring to the menu. And all the years I worked in customer service, even if I was irritated by someone I was helping,

I never was rude and talked to them in any kind of way. Any kind of way. Any kind of way. Well, here's the thing about that. If you fuck your order up and then I'll fix it at the window, you can't do that now. No, you can't do that. They have to put that in and now it's in a cycle. There's a system. Yeah Yeah, there's an assembly line, right?

They put the order in now now it's three cars backs order you that's why the moron if you're on a car pick Imagine you there's a car being built you're on an assembly line. Someone can't just go Oh, I forgot to put in the fucking fuel injector when it's down there when they're doing the seat belts. It doesn't go backwards. It's already painted man. It's fucking done. I don't know what to tell you. It's done. This bitch ain't gonna start though, you know what I mean. They're zipping tires on it. Yeah it's fucking over man. It's all over with. So okay, I tried to reorder. There, right, refresh. Oh it's referring to the menu. Checkers should retain some of their employees so that they know how to give better customer service. Nobody will ever retain employees at a fast food restaurant as long as they exist. Never.

You get that's just a job to get another job. It's entry level and you have that job while you look for an actual job. You're not like, man, I can't wait till I'm 65 and I retire from here. Give me that golden French fry. BK 401k. BK 401k. I like that. Astrid, one star. 840 PM and we pull up to the drive-through window. All right, that seems normal. Guy comes over the speaker and says, sorry, we is closed. We close at nine. I love, I love eating eatery, digging their feet in being like, we leave at nine. It's not that we're closed at nine.

We've already begun. We're locking the door at nine. See that's how we're already cleaning fryers and show like it's over. We shut shit off at at 9. We're already cleaning fryers and shit like it's over. We shut shit off at 8.30. We leave at 9. They have no work ethic. We were not the only customers turned away. Okay, response from the owner we got here. Oh. Hi Astrid, we hate to let you down as a Checkers fan. We will certainly look into these issues including confusion about our hours. That's not confusion, you close at nine, and you close at 840 in reality.

He's going down to that restaurant and straightening out that confusion. You guys leave when you leave, we close at nine. We close at nine. Fuck all of you. I don't care if you got a date. You fix this. You're pushing customers away, why bother being open?

My profits. If you'd like to reach out to us, you can always contact us on the website, which I don't get to because I've worked at a lot of restaurants and all the restaurants I've worked at. Like I worked at like Tooties in Phoenix there, the nice Italian restaurant. If people came in fucking 10 minutes before we were closed,

that fucking cook, all the chefs, they were re-fucking up their kitchen they'd just cleaned and there was no question. No question. Owner was a crazy Italian guy that was like, cook now, motherfucker, I'll stab you. There was no, oh wow, we're kinda closing right, nope, we're open, so we're making this money.

Get the fuck back there, what am I paying you for? Olive Garden's a chain, and they do that shit to us too. Fuck yeah, every place I ever worked with that. I already did my side work, you've got another table. Tough shit yeah sorry yeah you're doing it. What job do you have? You're a server? Fucking serve bitch. Yeah I've fucking been I've had that it's been said to me too. All right well I guess I'm doing that. All right sour milkshakes here we go. BG one star after 20 minute wait only one vehicle in front of me I pulled up to their window. The vehicle in front of me received their order in one small bag

It's a long wait for a small order Yeah Then while I continued to wait a male employee came up front to do something and I noticed his pants were down below his butt cheeks Oh boy, I lost my appetite, but I can tell come on you saw his fucking boxer shorts, please Was it laundry day and his whole ass? Was wearing underwear was he shitting did he just pull his pants down low enough to get a turnout that would make you lose Your appetite did you see his asshole? Maybe when the big Buford. Oh, they have a big Buford here, too

Okay, so it's the same thing when the big Buford fries and the Coca-Cola were ready, I told the young lady I did not want it due to the young man's grossness, R.E., pants not covering his butt. So you waited in line more. You cut your nose off just to spite his ass, and that's bullshit. If you lost your appetite, fucking drive away. You waited longer yeah people will this is what I'm saying about people they will wait they'll go out of their way and oh they can't wait make their night worse just to be a piece of shit

asshole to be absolutely yeah I will fucking cut my on the line just I'm so annoyed with people right now I think I threw two pages of coupons away and will never eat fast food anywhere ever again Well, you should your doctor should thank them Yes, you are now going to be the healthiest person in Alabama state of Alabama One guy had low-riding sagging pants, so you'll never eat fast food again. Take it easy, Bill Cosby. That's fucking normal, right? Yeah.

Yeah, exactly. That's normal. Oh my god. Wow. Nesha One Star picked up or messed up my order three times and it was clear they weren't concerned about what I actually ordered. The third time I told them, just give me the bun, meat, lettuce, pickles and I would put it together myself.

The girl gave me lettuce and tomatoes, no no pickles so at that point I just left they offered I'll just make it myself and they're like no we'll fuck that up too Shantae one star dolphin island Parkway location always have nasty management Okay, always the lady with the Louisiana accent is the worst. Oh Jesus. She got specific always Louisiana trash that Cajun bitch can fuck herself Take that. Wow. Always slow service any time of day or night.

Good funnel cake fries though. I'll bet. That sounds awesome. Wow. That sounds good. Yeah, there's a lot. The food, I'll eat it, man. I mean, that's okay.

Davida, one star. Been standing at the window in the rain for 13 minutes for only some value fries. There was no cars at either window. Well, that's the value of it. It's part of why it's cheap. No cars at either window. And when I got their attention to make my order, finally after four cars had passed through, the manager who was at the counter, or at the computer came up and gave me my fries.

Here you go. Okay. Um, Jean one star. He's got a conspiracy theory here. Here we go. Had suspicion. Oh, okay. When thug looking employees stuck bag out drive through window with no hello.

Thank you. Etc. Had the runs for three days now. And when I, when I mentioned it to other people here at the Marina, they shared the same experiences. Food sanitation, we'll never eat again at Checkers. Down at the Marina. Listen, you rich cunt, tell you what.

You and your Marina friends go eat some fucking clams or oysters or shrimp or some shit down at a nice waterfront thing and leave the fast food to us fucking peasants, okay? It's for us, that's why. Your system isn't ready for this shit. some shit down in a nice waterfront thing and leave the fast food to us fucking peasants, okay? It's for us. That's why and your system isn't ready for this shit. Yeah. Yeah coded racism in there and that too Yeah, obviously that's that goes without saying That guy got me sick cuz he touched it you fucking scumbag. His blackness made me ill Mud bugs

Glass of fucking mud bugs you guys. Jesus Christ. Darnitia, one star. Once again they left items from my order. Now we're under tornado watch so I'm not going back out in the storm. And they won't answer the phone. They probably went home too. Tornado watch motherfucker, what are you talking about? That's funny.

What did you expect, delivery? There's tornadoes out there. I need people to bring me food and take their lives into their own hands. Oh shit. To bring me cheeseburgers. Come on, deliver it even though that's not a service you offer. This is America, man. That's what it is right now.

It's god damn it, you fucking entitled asshole. Hop in the truck with fucking Paxton and Helen Hutton. Get over here. It's a Dodge V10 and chance losing your life. Bring me curly fries. Take Philip Seymour Hoffman from the fucking ground and get to my house with my goddamn hamburger. Did you know Jamie Gertz has $4 billion? No, that's crazy. Isn't that crazy?

It can't be from acting. That's no, no, no,'s crazy not isn't that crazy can't be from acting that's no no that's not what twister did she's in a lot of movies but come on yeah a woman has four billion dollars she married a guy with ten point nine There you go. She got half. She's doing great now. Oh God, and finally, Chris, one star, great place for a good case of the mud butt. There you go. The old mud butt coming here. Okay, so. That's a terrible way to call it. That is not good.

So we've eaten checkers and we've felt- Our ass cheeks are welded together. We're hungry and it's 8.45 and we have nowhere to go at this point. So let's head out of there. Let's head out west and let's go try to glimpse some celebrities, shall we? Oh, what are we going to do? We're going to the shittiest, most dumb, stupid fucking tourist thing ever. Celebrity tour?

This is to bilk foreigners who don't know any better. I think everyone in America knows not to take a Hollywood like bus tour because you're not seeing shit. Yeah, I'm stupid, yeah. But if you come from like some other country in the middle of nowhere, you just go Hollywood, stars will be walking around everywhere. We're going on a star line tour here.

Oh boy, where they go bother people, show you fucking Philip Seymour Hoffman's old house. This is where Barbara Mandrell used to live in the 60s. Who's that? Never mind. Someone who was famous a long time ago. Just pull up in front of a cemetery and just start rattling off all the people that live

here now. Oh god, this has 3.6 stars at a 1600 reviews plus. Golly! Lots of them. 6801 Hollywood Boulevard is the address if you want to go there. And let's get right into this. Joshua 5 stars. He's jacked about this shit.

He loves it. We did a private day tour with Lee, which was terrific. He arrived on time and the vehicle accommodated our accessibility needs. He navigated traffic great to keep our itinerary on target and was loaded with facts and trivia about Hollywood and greater LA. Gwen helped set up the tour and answered all my questions. So these can go but did you didn't see shit though is what it is. No, you just drove around. You learned where movies were filmed, a scene was here, that's where James Dean fucked Marilyn Monroe or whatever. And they show there's a sign, they show

the Hollywood sign, it looks like they went to Venice Beach, like just the most touristy spots ever, like here's this, here's that. You could have googled where all this shit is. Google Maps would have taken you. You definitely didn't need this need this no Brad five stars and underneath that he wrote five stars exclamation point We knew Brad Wow it was a great experience Alan did a great job very knowledgeable and entertaining would highly recommend We even saw Charo walking her dog. Yeah That's the celebrity experience that you're gonna see. Maybe Charo. I didn't know Charo. I thought she died 25 years ago.

I had no idea Charo was alive or that she had a dog. Her face is only 12 years old. Very young. We saw Charo walking her dog. I don't know. That tells you everything you need to know about this car right here Well, she does it every day at the same time It's very easy to see and she says coochie coochie coochie and waves at the fucking buses

Holy fucking shit unbelievable Jill three stars customer service by phone awful customer service. Customer service in person? Excellent. Narration did not match with ride. What does that mean? They have little plug things I've read here that you can plug in like a headphone thing or just an app to your phone that you can do and apparently that's not,

unless the person stays specifically on the route and there's no traffic and the time's out, right? It's not the Alcatraz tour. There's other people at, you know. couple of years that that line gets longer as they move there yeah bus would pass a site and later narrator would mention it not that great perfect oh man okay what do we have three stars from Jay the path that the bus driver took was fine but the monotone delivery by the driver could not have been more flat.

He sounded like a fourth grader being forced to read. Well now you want performers to do this? You want a celebrity to read this to you? Somebody that behaves this way? That acts? You want a stand up comic to fucking take you around? It's probably going to cost more than $12 or whatever you paid for that if you want someone to be entertaining also on this trip.

Here's the shit. Did he show you shit? Sherry won star. It was a traumatizing experience. Oh, wow. She saw Charo. I was going to say she saw Charo and her dog shitting on the lawn together. Charo said, coochie coochie right here. And she took her pants down. We went on the red and yellow bus line when we got to Beverly Hills and switched buses switched buses now What don't like that? We were on the double decker and we and we stopped and I heard someone from the ground Yelling at us meaning some are not on the bus boat. The bus is on fire the bus

Fire not Okay, the bus driver never checked on us. There was no systems in place to get off the bus. And it was on fire, by the way. Oh, it was on fire! An inferno. A fucking inferno that would have taken all everyone's lives here. It was probably the bus driver screaming it

as he ran away. Hey, it's on fire! I'm leaving, you guys. It's all out of you now. I'm getting another job. Okay, the bus driver never checked on us. My family were the last ones off due to the fact that we were helping everyone get off the bus. Wow.

Well, that's a mistake right there. Yeah, way to go hero. It was very traumatizing. The company never emailed me to see if we were okay. When I called to ask for a refund, they said it would have to be approved. We got to see if FIRE buyers on the refund approval list here. We're not sure. Tripp cut short by blazing inferno doesn't seem to be on the list of things I can give

it for. Well, we gotta look and see if we made enough money last week to cover the cost of that bus and then we'll let you know if we got a little leftover. Good God. I would not recommend this company. The buses are not safe and you can't hear the tour through the headphones either. Here is a picture of the bus on fire. Unbelievable. It's all the way up the top. It's setting a tree on fire next to it. There's fire trucks, the cops, they've shut the whole

road down. This was a problem called at cause hours of traffic holy shit that's funny that is fucking amazing and the response from the owner is one of the things I've ever heard the response should be hope you didn't get burned really sorry but instead they say thank you for sharing your thoughts Sherry We'd love to hear how we could earn five stars from you. Let me think I Don't know have my experience not end with a fucking running from my life from an inferno That would be great if you could do that. Maybe have have you got any buses that don't catch on fire That's literally fire. It can't be anywhere. It's not a weird smell.

No, no, no. It's not the bus shakes a little bit as it goes. It's on fire. Fucking currently. The car's on fire. That's how you can get five stars. Don't be on fire actively. I've never ridden in any vehicle that caught on fire. No. That's insane. That is fucking insane.

Oh my God, I can't get over the fire. Okay, I'm dying here. Cecily, one star. Holy shit. At this point, if it got there without bursting into flames, I think you should be happy with it. It's a pretty good day. I'm dying. If I read those reviews, I'd be like, five stars, my bus didn't catch on fire, so I guess

I'm doing better than most. If you run a business and it catches on fire, just close. You're not going to overcome that. Well, don't ask how we could do better. Don't be on fire. That's how you could do better. Tell you right now how you could do better. OK, Cecily One Star.

We were excited about this store and having the ability to learn about different sites and get on and off the bus. As soon as we got on the bus, we realized this was not going to be a great situation. Uh oh, now we're trapped. It started out by the bus driver clearly not wanting to be there. No. Gee, he doesn't want to drive a giant truck through LA traffic? Shocking!

I can't imagine. He's going to be scanning his mirrors the whole time to see if there's a flame coming out of the back. That's the other thing. He's gonna be scanning his mirrors the whole time to see if there's a flame coming out of the back. That's the other thing. He just escaped, barely escaped with his life from his last shift. He was yelling at everybody to sit down and exclaim that, I don't speak nothing other than English.

Oh boy. Sir, you don't speak English either. I may have a news for you. You don't have that one nailed down. I don't know. Start learning like hieroglyphics or some shit because you're not communicating well. Pick up that English Rosetta stone because you need a refresher. So if you're sitting next to someone who doesn't speak English,

tell him to sit down. Basically telling them, so I don't speak nothing but English, so fucking pull somebody down if they're standing up. The audio did not work on the bus So we could not listen to the tour we did download the app however because it was all tied to GPS We could only hear small portions of the dialogue because the bus driver was not stopping at the appropriate places And was just flying through the stops Doesn't give a fuck. Well got the window quick. You're gonna miss where dr. Dre shot Look out the window quick, you're going to miss where Dr. Dre shot a video with Snoop Dogg. There's VIP record Snoop Dogg on top. Too late.

Too late. We're out of here. Guess we're not stopping there. Oh, that is fucking amazing. We got off at stop five, did not get back on. I've done similar tours and other cities and always have had good experiences. However, this one was not one of them I was terribly disappointed

I called and complained to customer service and they said they would be Contacting management to see about getting me a refund and that they would be reaching out to me to let me know of their decision As of today, I have not reserved any received any word back. Listen If the fire lady isn't getting a refund, you sure as fuck aren't getting a refund because this guy kind of buzzed through spots. You know what I mean? E-mod gives one star, worst hop on hop off ever. We tried many other hop on hop off services all over the world, but this company in LA was the worst of them for many reasons. And then he lists the reasons. The drivers are too rude and shouting at the passengers at all times

Yeah, they left the passengers on the street in a sunny area on a hot day Waiting for a connecting bus for more than two hours Whoa, they just stood on the street in la for two hours Yeah, holy shit People probably started just giving them money thinking they were starting a show or something. Throwing them water bottles. Yeah, some shit. Two hours without sending another bus through as there were three other buses of different routes belonging to the same company. They could have switched the route easily to collect the stranded passengers as the other respectable companies do. Respectable.

And as a result of this delay, we missed the last route, although we paid for it, and there was no one on the main stop to speak with. It seems they have poor management. I don't recommend this hop-on hop-off company in LA at all. I can't believe that exists there. That's really crazy. That's really putting so much trust in so many different things at the same time. So much shit.

Yeah, even that it's not going to catch on fire. It wouldn't catch on fire, that traffic's not going to snarl this whole thing, that the drivers give a shit. They give a shit is a big if. That's a big deal. It's a big if. Now, Carmen gives one star in pretty much the same experience. Rode the bus on the 4th of September in LA, so keep in mind that's hot.

Yeah, that's hot. The bus, the first bus on the day was 25 minutes late. Then we got to the transfer point for the Santa Monica route. The speaker for this, for that line wasn't working. The driver told us we needed to wait for it to be repaired for almost an hour. We rate, we waited no replacement bus, just the expectation that we wait in the scorching midday sun and heat with no offer for shade or water They didn't give these people water right they're gonna keep like a cooler of waters in case of problem or anything up there By the time we got down to Santa Monica We essentially had 20 minutes down there as we had a hike in the Hollywood Hills that afternoon

We lost half of our day due to the lack of care from the drivers yet. They have no problems asking for tips Just I mean over exists you could get the fuck out of there pretty easily you fucking that's what I mean, too That's not like you're stuck there, but you fucking the bus driver pulls up your sweating dehydrated They're like a tip jar tip jar like fuck you he taps it Yeah, he has some little speech that he has rehearsed and memorized for sure. That little joke he gives, yeah. Out of all the cities I've used, I hop on hop off bus. This one has been by far the worst experience and the biggest waste of money. We booked a three-day pass and did not get anywhere near the value of the ticket price.

And those two customers were like not at the same time they left it or anything. So this is just a common experience. Consistent thing, yeah. Common experience here. And another one here talking about there's no AC, the AC wasn't working, the speakers on the bus had constant static noise. It sounded like, it sounds like a prison bus. It sounds like when you go to the river

and they like have that shitty bus that drops you off. From the parking lot? Yeah. Yeah. No good. The bus is taking your life in your hands more than the actual River Rapids. Yeah, no shit. Yeah, this hot with constant,

that sounds like a fucking nightmare. Alejandro, one star, the worst company ever. Worst company ever. It is the second time I do the tour in Los Angeles and the second time I have to deal with disrespectful employees, bad schedules, dirty units where headphones don't work, etc. Dirty, it made me think of a big filthy dick, didn't it? Immediately when I thought dirty units, I'm like, yeah, just all stinky. I didn't like that they fucked me, but I didn't mind that they fucked me, but it was that

dirty unit they used. It was that dirty unit, man. Wasn't that Randy Johnson's second nickname, the dirty unit? The big dirty unit? I think he went by sometimes. I asked the name of the girl in Dolby Theater to report her, and of course she didn't want to give me her name. She literally yelled at me and told me to quote,

complain with the company! Exclamation point. Call somebody who cares. Call someone who gives a fuck. Are you on fire currently? No? Don't care. And while writing this review,

I witnessed how she was yelling to many customers, there are so many tours in LA, do not buy anything from Starline Tours, including city sightseeing. I still can't get over, we saw Charo walking her dog. See, it's the only celebrity that's ever been named in this so far. It's so funny because that's like, if you were going to say like, what are you going to see, Charo walking her dog? That was, that would be what you'd say. Like if you, if you

were that good of a comedian, you'd come up with that Charo walking your dog You can't that's random and it's either Charo or Lorenzo Llamas. Yes, exactly I saw Lorenzo Llamas on a motorcycle or some shit would be the other one Who gives this shit? That was worth it to you. I saw Lorenzo Llamas playing with his pet bird. Oh I saw Lorenzo Lamas playing with his pet bird. Oh, John one star. I was very excited at the thought of going on this tour. Things did not start off well. Don't be fooled on the booking site when it says only nine places left for this slot.

The van only took eight. They included a driver. They had to recruit him too. Only eight spots left. That's all there is. That's amazing. That's so funny. The website states to get there 30 minutes early.

They emailed me eight minutes before my estimated arrival time to say that they had delayed my ride. This is not acceptable when you have already parked in an extremely expensive car park. When I turned up at the kiosk, my QR code on my phone wouldn't scan, so I was directed to quote, the boss, the man sitting down in the black shirt. He definitely should not be working in tourism or customer service. He was the rudest, most ignorant man I have come across. I suppose ever.

Was it actually Bruce Springsteen? It might have been. Maybe it was. He didn't know why you were asking him those questions. He's like, hey man, I don't know why you're asking me about Starline Tours and stuff, man. It's ain't what I'm about. I'm about some blue collar music.

Here. One, two, three, four. Let me play a song about me being in love with a child. Oh, oh, oh, oh, I won't fire. Hold on, let me play another one here. This is about... Listen,, is your daddy home? Is your daddy home? Now I'm gonna play 14 songs about trying to escape from a small town. That I don't even live in. All right then. Yeah, Bruce is fine though. He's the best. I love him. It's amazing he's at

old and he still does like big giant concerts. Three hour shows man. I'm not doing that. Three fucking hours. We're not doing that now. No. Three hours is a lot. That's way long.

Wow. There is not enough, this is wild, there's not enough salt and ketchup in LA for the size of the chip on his shoulder. I've never heard that before. Well done. Well done. In all the reviews we've done, never come up before. That's impressive. That's a good if I could give zero stars.

That feels like a very English man. A chip, yeah, because he used a chip rather than a french fry. On the actual tour, there wasn't a great deal about the current stars and where they live, but we learned a lot about agriculture and topiary. I don't think that's what they were going for. Yeah, because they can't show you where fucking Jennifer Aniston lives, you fucking lunatic. Because when one of you comes back and breaks in and murders her, there's going to be a problem. It's on them for showing you where they live. God damn it.

Holy shit. If you go on this tour, be prepared to get cold. Also, the suggestion that the tour guides are underpaid and have to survive on their tips is somewhat fanciful. The arrogance of the man suggesting how much I should tip in is beyond description. He said, I suggest $10 per person, by the way, he suggested. I'm thinking about 10 bucks per person should make this even out for me. There's eight seats. I figure $80 a ride seems reasonable to me. It works, right?

Would I do this trip again? No way. I'm unable to contact the tour company via the telephone numbers supplied below. Starline may have email if they really wish to discuss the issue and they can contact me blah, blah, blah. Okay, Tracy, one star. The tour did not stop at many places I was interested in seeing.

Okay, what do you want? It does tell you ahead of time where it's gonna stop. Where it's gonna go, yeah. So you should probably know ahead of time if you're interested in seeing that show. I don't think they take requests. No, no, hey, we're going off route here. We're going to the Menendez Brothers house now. Let's find that.

These people really want to see it. This is where it gets real dark. The only other window right there is where they found the black dolly of Sodden Half. It is pretty good. It's not bad. Next thing you know, we're going to the Hotel Cecil where Richard Ramirez stayed a lot. What do you think? We're going to walk all the way to the top and find that water tower they found that

girl in. It's going to happen. We're going to look at it and see if and find that water tower they found that girl in. It's gonna happen. We're gonna look at it and see if any of you fucking people can figure it out. Because it's been bugging me for a long time. You keep it up, I'm gonna put all of you in it.

All of you. The one place I wanted to stop at, Rodeo Drive, was so far away from Drop Off location. Yeah, it's Beverly Fucking Hills. And why do you want to go there? It's just stores. What do you... It's just...

It's just Cartier, stop it. It's the extremely, extremely expensive, like, flagships of their... It's the shit you can't buy. Yeah, it's so expensive. It's literally a store with seven things in it for no reason. I was just gonna say, they have four things on a rack because... There's no inventory. No, they just have it there literally to have their sign up there

So everyone's only reason why it's there because in New York, it's the same thing. Yeah, you see all these doors You're like, why is this here? Why don't right? There's no one shopping in here The rent is probably 50 grand a month in this fucking joint. What are we doing? Yeah, so it's just together It's a write-off. I guess So I wanted to go to Rodeo Drive. The buses didn't run many hours, so we didn't have time to see what we wanted. I tried three different audio boxes that didn't work, so it was basically a two-hour silent ride with nothing notable to see.

Just a bus ride through LA, which by the way, you could have gotten way fucking cheaper by going and sitting at a goddamn bus stop. You idiot. They didn't take you where you wanted to go. Nobody gave you a guided tour. That's a bus ride. I'm sorry. You betcha, yeah. Well, basically with nothing notable to see. Very disappointing. I've taken many hop-on hop-off bus tours, but this is by far the worst one I have encountered.

This is a thing that people do apparently. Kyle one star. many hop-on hop-off bus tours, but this is by far the worst one I have encountered. This is a thing that people do apparently. Wow! Kyle One Star. I went on Celebrity Homes Tour on July 11th. That's dangerous. I originally scheduled it for 5pm, got there early 4.18pm, and the gentleman working the check-in asked if I would be okay moving up to the 4.30 slot.

Sounds great. I was perfectly fine with that since I was already there, but somewhat concerned that he said since I was the only one for the 5pm they would have cancelled it, but when I was going to when was I going to be told that last minute? Yes. Yes. They were waiting for more people to show up and if no one else showed up by five They're gonna go. Sorry. We're not doing this with you The sun's going down and it's fucking weird to drive a bus in front celebrities homes in the dark dark fucking great Yeah, if you go creep under that tree right there, you could see in her window. I'm telling you You can see in Courtney Cox's window, you know you want to

Why do they do this? I hate this so much. I went on Celebrity Homes Tour, there it is. So there was another group for the 430 slot that they were waiting for that did not show up until 4.56pm. So he's going on the 5 no matter what. Annoyed, but it was fine since I was there. You showed up early, so you were ready to wait till five anyway, so you shouldn't be upset about that.

The group gets on and immediately they are rambunctious, shouting homophobic and racial slurs from the bus windows toward people on the sidewalk or in cars next to us. What the fuck are you doing? What? Why are you on a field trip with 11 year olds? What is happening right now? Shouting slurs out of a bus window?

What the fuck is wrong with you? Was the bus driver encouraging it? Or was he trying to stop it? Try this one! Check this fucking guy out! Best insult wins a free trip on the bus next time! Come on! What is happening?

If you insult him hard enough, I'll take you to Magic Johnson's house. Yeah, it's house. Yeah, it's alright. We'll lay on the horn. You could put multiple slurs together with him. The two people behind me were constantly on their cell phone talking to people during the tour. They're just on the phone.

Unbelievable. At one point when we were in the hills, the tour guide pulled over at a scenic overlook and allowed one of the people from the other group to urinate in a bush on the side of the road All while other people were around and watching And there's a bush go hurry quick Like it's right here holy fucking balls.

Wow. That's amazing. As the tour continued, instead of seeing, instead of the tour guide putting a stop to the nonsense and slurs being shouted out, he somewhat encouraged their behavior. He sure did. God damn it.

Toward the end of the tour, the other group started asking how much longer was left as one of them Had made dinner reservations and needed to get back They proceeded to ask if we could just head back at that time and essentially end the tour early Wow, they sound like great people just just great fucking not selfish twats at all The tour guide asked if they were sure they didn't want to go to Rodeo Drive first before heading back as that was the last part of the tour.

They kept saying no, just head back now, which the tour guide proceeded to do. So this guy's just stuck with these people. I did a lot of research prior to choosing a tour and everything I read and Starline is the only tour for the best experience. The unprofessionalism of the driver, lack of handling, an obnoxious group, and the entire tour itself was the worst experience I had during my trip, during my week visiting LA, and of course it was on the last day of my trip putting a damper on the entire trip altogether. Not only will I never go on another Starlines tour, I will never recommend anyone use Starlines either.

I recommend you just do things yourself because Go where we are. Map it out. You have the internet. You can map out anything you want. And stop setting the fucking bar so high for vacation. You're not always going to see Charo walking her dog. You're not always going to see it. Sometimes that dog doesn't have to shit. Sometimes it doesn't have to shit.

You're not going to sometimes it's Charro's maid walking the dog. Then you, is that exciting? I saw Charro's maid walking the dog. I saw Gavin McLeod outside playing with his cat. Is that something that you care about? I saw Cato Cailin in McDonald's drive-thru. I would love to talk to Cato Cailin, by the way.

I bet you could. I have so many fucking questions for Cato. You probably could. He might be working the window. He pulls his visor down real low though. That poor fucking guy's life was ruined. He's got like podcasts and shit now. Yeah, but by all intents and purposes, his career should have been to the moon, but it ruined everything.

He's always going to be a not a huge famous guy. No, no, but now, I mean today, anything that happens if you're a fucking hanger on to some fucking thing that happened. Oh, now it would have been huge. Now your life's incredible. You don't even have to be a hanger on to something. Someone could stop you on the street, you make a dumb comment for two seconds

and next time you're a fucking celebrity being invited and paid to go to fucking events and shit not like you've been working your balls off on comedy career podcasts for that fucking years and doing all that doesn't matter. No so you just tell people how to give a good blowjob. Kato would have 50 million fucking dollars right now. He would be crushing it if OJ murdered someone in 2016 instead of 1990 fucking four. Instead of ruined his fucking life.

God damn it. Yeah, Kato, this is a fact. You must hate that. And we love you. I'd love to hang out with you. I'd love to be your best friend. The fact that Gypsy Rose is making more money than you must fucking kill you.

That's a travesty, Kato. Come be our third stooge. Kato. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Jamie wants to.

You're welcome anytime, Kato. You're welcome to come on the show, Kato. You're more than welcome to come on the show. He was hilarious on the stand at the OJ trap. He was so funny. He really was. I don't know if it was on purpose, but he was fucking hilarious.

That's the other part is that I'm worried that it's not on purpose and that he's just like a bumbling buffoon. That's fun too. I don't like it. I'd rather that, to be honest. Oh my God. All right, let's see here.

Let's go to this one here. Stacy One-Star. I have to say I was disappointed the driver Lee Constantly repeated the phrase ladies and gentlemen so often that it was a major turnoff. It's just a schtick Why are you turned on? Just yeah At first she was wet and then it didn't work out like he dried it up I was getting wet and I heard it in the yard. No, I'm not into it I'm talking well over 50 times in two hours

That's kind of annoying his facts were not always accurate. I eat that The facts are not always accurate I eat Justin Bieber's girlfriend you mean his wife Oh For fuck's sake girlfriend Haley. You mean his wife. Who cares? Who gives a fuck? He's not a 21 year old girl so he doesn't give a shit probably. Maybe he didn't get the Us Weekly that said that they tied the knot. Oh my god, he missed it. He was verbally aggressive with several other drivers. Well you drive in LA traffic and see how you fucking do.

I'm very aggressive in LA traffic with other drivers. He spoke about going home to crack a beer and chase it with a shot, you know, like a normal person I would say, that's fine. Bad mouth most of the celebrities he showed us hoves on. Priscilla Presley was and is on drugs, for example. Yeah, I think we figured that out. This is before.

Well, not anymore. Not anymore, yeah. She gets it. It was just a fairly negative experience and not an excellent use of my money. I won't use Starline again, sorry. That is very funny that he happens to know that she's a drug addict.

Yeah, well, I mean, he reads that part of us weekly, apparently. Yeah, he got that one. Nothing else at all here. Oh my god, these people with my ticket in hand, all this shit. Kyla one star. The bus was run down, was led into an alleyway by an employee. That sounds rapey.

What? I don't like that. Did his pants stay on, I hope? Yeah. Bus smelt like pee. Not smelled, smelt. Like a fish? With a T, like a smelt, exactly. Bus smelt like pee. smelled smelt like a fish with a tea like a smelt exactly but smelt like

food and you could barely hear tour guide pick another tour bus company oh this is fun too I'll do this and this will be the last one Andre one star the driver almost fell off the road with us what there's a picture of the drive. This is fucking hilarious. Check this out. Look at this lady looking at it like, yep, we're off the road. That's a fact. Yeah. You're pulled off the road. Yeah. It's going down a hill. Uh, yes, it's a mountain and we could have gotten hurt really bad. Died? Question mark in parentheses. If you tumble down a mountain, yes, we sent meme emails asking for a refund They didn't reply. I'm gonna go out on a limb here. They don't do refunds here a

Bus caught on fire lady. She didn't get money didn't get shit Oh my god this I hope I hope this is a JM one-star I gotta get say this dude This was not a good experience the bus was hot and the driver could not lower the temp due to possible complaints of it being too cold This was an eight hour tour. Let's at least be comfortable eight hours in LA How much I'm not I'm not going you go on a bus for eight hours What how much is there to see in LA that would not eight fucking hours Guido was informative That better be his fucking name.

Let me tell you something. Maybe it's that one group that Giel slurs out the window, I'm not sure. Informative, but after two hours, his thick accent became hard to listen to. Wow! Then it says, sorry, Guido, we do like you as a person. No, you don't.

No, you don't! You're a fucking asshole is what you are here. You are racist. At least just a person. No you don't. No you don't. You're a fucking asshole is what you are here. You are racist. At least just a dick. Chris one star Starline asked me to post something positive here and email an email if we felt they could improve things. Our tour was three weeks ago and we wrote right away saying how disappointed we were with the tour and the quote jokes told by the guide about addiction same guy Yeah, he's that's his sticky likes here. We also saw a lot of fences and hedges of homes where people used to live This was Lucille Ball's house, I can't even see it. Yeah, because she didn't like us

Yelling shit at her all the time Calling her screaming Lucy. I'm home You got a lot of splayed into do as we drive down the street gets old after a while All right, and then finally yeah, let's get to our personal item of the year. We go I don't know what the fuck this thing is. I'm gonna be honest with you. Um, let me see Oh gonna read the maybe I know this first and then hopefully maybe you'll figure it out I just don't understand how I guess it I don't know. Okay. It's a Mitsu MIS or mistu MISSTU sex furniture sex furniture positions bouncing mount stools

furniture, sex furniture positions, bouncing mount stools, boost your sex life with Mistu Weightless Love Position AIDS Chair with Handrail Novelty Toy for Couples Adult Games. I feel like this is like a... Like a... A fuck cushion? A fuck thing for like old people who can't, don't have mobility problems. Okay. That's what it feels like. You did say AIDS chair, but I know what you meant.

It's what it says. AIDS chair. Love Position AIDS Chair. did say AIDS chair, but I know what you meant. It's what it says, AIDS chair. Love position, AIDS chair. Is it a chair? Look at it. I don't know what it is. It is a chair. It's a, it's like a, like what you use to practice lassoing shit.

It's like a saddle. Yeah, it looks like a practice saddle, but it's got like two nylon strips on top with an opening in the middle, I assume where the dick goes. Either that or you get on your knees. I bet. I guess you could do it in many different ways. I suppose so. There's like handles. Scaring.

It doesn't look like it would. You'd look like you'd go, okay, well how do you, if I wait a second. No, but if you're there, then I can't reach you here. Like it would be very, this is $66.99 on Amazon by the way. $60 for that thing? I kind of want to get it. Just to see what the very this is sixty six ninety nine on Amazon by the way Sixty dollars for that dollars Six of them and set them by my pool Sarah had some like nice chair thing for our patio and to me it just looked like a sex swing and I would be like

I'm gonna move the sex swing over here. She's like it's not a sex swing to me it just looked like a sex swing. And I would be like, I'm gonna move the sex swing over here. She's like, it's not a sex swing. I'm like, I know, I know, I'm sorry. Sure looks like it. It was a very nice chair, but it looked a little sex swingy. So control your rhythm. Miss Two Weightless Sex Chair have two stretchy panels

that add some springiness to riding positions. So you can bounce. So you can bounce, and I guess it's also, so it's easier on your legs. It feels like this is for very old people. A handle on Miss Two Sex St stool keeps body balance on sex. Keeps body balance on sex. You can perch up on top with your partner below the stool then work yourself into a

rhythm at your own pace. Unlock new sex positions with the love position aides. Jesus, not good. Then it says, for pregnant women and people with knee injuries, the sex position aide can prop up your girl to save effort. Yeah, but where do you go? That's underneath it, I guess. You slide it. How's it going to hold me up? I don't get it. Myths 2 love stool is a good choice for those women and offers a

lot of convenience, but still careful, still be careful and follow doctor's advice. Yeah. Okay. Why do you need the sex stool? And it answers its own questions. Having sex is one of the best experiences most of us will have in our lives. That's the first answer.

Great answer. However, it can get boring if things are not changed up regularly. You can't just have sex in the same position every time if your girl has some knee injuries or needs something to save effort during Sex the mist to sex position stool is your best choice work yourself into a rhythm. Oh right Let's see here and then it shows here. Look cuz there's a picture of a girl like like fucking a like Oh, oh those straps really come down low. They come down low, yeah.

They look really stiff at the top, but apparently they come down low and you can really get your bounce on. She's fucking a Sibian. That's what I was just gonna say, she's fucking that. So I don't know how big they think my dick is because it doesn't seem like it comes down low enough to even get me inside.

If you're thin, maybe. Also, if you're a little hefty, you're not fitting your fat ass through that fucking... No! No! You're just not. Anyway, five stars from Randy. Wow, Randy loves it.

Loves it. Unlike so many things you buy online that are never like the picture or description, this item is exactly what I ordered. Okay. Okay. In fact, it's sturdier than expected and should provide us months if not years of fun. Excellent quality, easy to assemble even by yourself.

The five stars I gave you are well deserved. It is the most true to form purchase I've ever made online. Okay. She's just happy because it's what the picture said. It worked. Yeah. Very easy to please here. Five stars. Don't believe the negative reviews. I had low expectations after reading some of the reviews. We are very pleased with this item. Really? Very. I'll begin by saying it took all of two minutes to

assemble. My wife did help hold up one side while I connected the other tubes. The stool is sturdy and easily handles 200 pounds." So she's a bigger girl, she's saying. If I had to come up with something negative, it would be the height or lack thereof. I've already got a few ideas about how we can add a little height. We are happy with the purchase and would recommend to others. I'm glad we didn't let the negative comments scare us away. So it's lower than it looks, evidently. This guy coming up next, Derek, said, five stars good for larger folks.

He said, this bouncy little stool added something special to our love life. Assembly is simple but a bit of a struggle at the same time. I'm 300 pounds and the stool fit over my torso and hips but it was tight. Really? Yeah, he had fat oozing coming out of the sides of it. But still, he got in there. Like a pot roast in that net. Yeah, I know.

We both just looked at each other and we know exactly where that fucking line came from. Do you remember saying that? You know exactly what the fuck I'm talking about. We just went back to stand-up comedy in 2012, like that, of a line that we said, that Jimmy said to this, that's funny, okay, we'll get into that. We'll talk about it after the show, but god damn it. Looks like roast beef, you said. So, my wife is on the heavier side as well,

and she found it comfortable and very much looking forward to incorporating it many more times. So they really work this thing for both sides. He's gonna fucking, he's gonna live inside the. Yeah, I'm under here. He's gonna grow into it. He's gonna be fucking smelting into his skin. I'm half man pot stool is what I am

John five stars rode the rocket to a faraway galaxy. Oh Jesus works great Love it wife was able to ride into the wind like no other See biscuit Wow Took the bounce to infinity and beyond. Wow. Up to the tip of the mountain and back down and over. Made easy. Let's just say this volcano was excited to erupt. He came all over the place.

All that to say, my wife made me come. I almost shot this bitch through the ceiling. I mean, she, it was dangerous boy let me tell you something. Alright, D four stars, our first time dot dot dot, we bought the chair to help us with age and bad knees. God, this is just making old people fuck more. That's dangerous. The event started off innocent enough, the event. Next time any sex you have out there call it the event from now on. Innocent enough. In off innocent enough. The event. Next time, any sex you have out there, call it the event from now on. Innocent enough.

Innocent enough. Then things went bad. What? Jesus. Someone you didn't invite burst through the door? Did you commit a crime? Yeah, we were both excited to try it out and we're definitely ready to go. My girlfriend got on top. The chair combined with the wobbling of the bed it started to get really wonky Then she started laughing uncontrollably. I was concerned. She was going to fart That might be the strangest comment anyone's ever made on one of these fucking episodes

I was concerned she was going to fart. Yeah, she was laughing so hard. She was worried about peeing What is going on? What is happening? Go handle your bodily functions before sex, please So I started laughing uncontrollably. So my girlfriend is laughing so hard she looks like she's going to have a stroke. She grabs the 10 speed looking handles and tries to stop laughing. I can't stop laughing either. I guess I had a look of fear as well as arousal on my face. It was definitely wobbly. I totally lost my boner."

Did anybody shit or piss? Did a 12 year old write this? There's farts and boners and fucking... This sounds like a 12 year old saw this and was like, I'm going to write a fake review and pretend I'm an old person. She was laughing so hard I thought she was going to fart. What is going on? We want to try again, maybe on the floor, but we can't even mention it without bursting

into tears with laughter It's definitely a source of fun for sure So, you know what they have an inside joke now for the rest of their lives worth $67 doesn't even matter if they're fucking doesn't get better I just don't understand where the where the joke the punch line, you know, I mean, I don't know why they were both laughing So I don't get it either. I don't understand wobbly and now we're laughing like somebody's tickling us thing You know someone's farting. I don't get it either, I don't understand. It's wobbly and now we're laughing like somebody's tickling us? Next thing you know, someone's farting. I don't understand it.

I don't get it. I don't get it. Then this guy's limp, Jesus. Four stars, it's solid but not for tall people. Okay. It's solid but too short for my five foot eight tall girlfriend. It was frustrating, she was tipping over.

It's like doing squats on the floor starting from below parallel. I didn't realize there are others that have adjustable height. I'm surprised there isn't any companies that really get this stuff right. Those that come close charge a fortune, you know, if it works right. You could probably make your own structural pipe such as steel tech and have some heavy- I'm not making a fuck toy. I'm not making a fuck stool. You see, if you get some aluminum and a tape welder, I can show making a fuck toy. I'm not making a fuck stool. I'm not doing it. You see, if you get some aluminum and a tape welder, I can show you how to put this shit together much better.

He said, get some heavy duty resistance bands. I do it, but prefer something less industrial looking for the bedroom. Yeah, you think? Yeah. He's out there with a welding torch in his garage going, hold on sweetheart, I'll be there in a minute. I think you gotta check in with your local union

to see if you're qualified for this. I think so. I think you got to check in with your local unions You have to at least check in with the yeah, yeah with the Stewart the shop Stewart to make sure this is okay I feel like I don't think you're allowed. I don't think so Samantha for three stars that hurt Yeah, was comfortable until the velcro scraped my ass. Oh, no That's nobody does the velcro folded up while using it and it it scraped all the way across took the skin off and bled Wow, that's some strong velcro and she kept fucking it sounds like do you may think it's funny reading this unless it's you Yeah, kind of Almost healed would take a pic but post and post but inappropriate, you know Right next to my snake star for crazy. Yeah, you know unlike that other the waxing they know, it's my asshole. Yeah, cause right next to my stink star for Christ's sake.

You know, unlike that other, the waxing, they were like, look at my asshole. That was just pictures of buttholes everywhere. Have a look, see, at my asshole that happens to be an inch away from my pussy that I'm also showing you. Which is also on screen here. Two stars, we'll leave you marked. Like the beast, what are we talking about?

Extremely hard to assemble. Will scrape your butt cheeks to death leaving blister and less skin on due to the adjustable straps rubbing your skin raw. Golly. This sounds scary. Aaron, two stars. Sadly, no. Okay. Massively uncomfortable for me. I bought this because of the great reviews. It was really challenging to muscle it together and I assemble things easily. Oh look at you Aaron I had to leverage it against the edge of a metal chair to get two pieces together Next problem the bars along the ground along the ground are right where my knees go. What the fuck? Next problem it rocks back. Maybe it's supposed to let us

rock? Yes, it's supposed to give you freedom. But I definitely fell over backwards. That's why there's handles. So you can lean and hang on like a mechanical bolt. Dirt bike. Yeah. Pretend you're an urban cowboy and John Travolta is attracted to you. That's fine. No problem. No matter where I put the straps they slid to the middle exactly where we don't want them yeah because I'm gonna chop this guy's cock off yeah it's a cock guillotine that's not great and then I just kind of hang the elastic doesn't feel particularly bouncy I haven't even tried it out with a

partner yet well then you don't know what you're talking about right just sitting in it is so uncomfortable for me. I'm sad. I really thought it would be awesome. I'll try it with a partner. Hope I don't fall backwards and we'll see. Yeah. I like how she did a dry run on her own. Right. I think they also put the, the, if it scratched you, I think they put the Velcro on underneath. You know what I mean? Like it should have gone under the bars and then Velcro on the bottom and somebody Velcroed it on the top. They probably did that wrong yeah I would assume so we'll do a couple more here we'll go a little long here. One star terrible terrible terrible is the start here. First of all this one

said can be used by handicap which may be true definitely not for a big woman with spina bifida and scoliosis. Oh my god! Why are you fucking? I think they said knee pain is what this is for, not spina bifida. They said if you have knee pain this is insane. Have somebody go down on you and treat you with kid gloves because that is frightening that you're up there with bad legs just throwing yourself. And a fucking twisted spine.

This is not good. But if you don't have any use of your legs and are not a small woman definitely will not work. You know you need your legs not sturdy at all broke just trying to get it together way too hard to get together. No give much taller than made out to be there is no bounce so if your partner has a small penis Definitely won't work for that either. They just so you have spina bifida scoliosis and a partner with a small penis your life is fucked Just totally all fucked up. Just go down on each other and call it a day. Jesus Christ

If I could give this product zero stars, I would! Holy shit. The lady with spina bifida said that? That's amazing. It could work if a man is willing to lift you on it, maybe, but it's been my experience. Men aren't trying to be helpful helpful and the least amount of work possible They just want to come and go is this the same one. It's the same person in my experience They won't help you pre-sex. They'll do anything for you. Yeah

Anything Afterwards, they won't help you. That's the problem. They leave you with your legs not working and jizz all over the place. That's what'll work Jesus Christ. Oh man, Justin One Star. Just assembled product with the wife today. Did seem sturdy and the elastic on it was great until we started to use it. After a few minutes of using it, the silver locking mechanisms in the bars got bent and one of the legs locking mechanism broke and the bar came apart, almost injured me.

Oh my god! She fell off it and if this product can hold 300 pounds then why can't it hold 164 pounds? Okay he's trying to brag at us a little bit. Yeah, what the hell? Yeah 300, my wife isn't 300 pounds. Tanisha One star, so upset. I am so upset. I bought this thing and tried to put it together and ended up putting one of the poles in the wrong hole.

Oh well sweetheart, you can't do that. Don't put it in the wrong hole. You put it in the wrong hole, it's definitely gonna hurt. I'll tell you that much, Jesus Christ. And now it's stuck, oh my God, poor Tanisha. And now you can't get it out. And I can't get it to come apart, so basically I wasted my money because I can't use the damn thing. No, it's because you put it together wrong.

And then finally Kyle, one star, impossible to put together. Okay, you can't do it either. You can't do it either. The metal clips do not work and it cannot be securely clicked into the slot as they move around. It's hard to explain, but do yourself a favor and go with another brand. That's not for me to explain, I'm really dumb. Disappointing birthday gift.

Oh what? You know what, grandma wanted you to be happy so you could probably return it and grandma doesn't want you to have a gift that you don't like, you know what I mean? Anyway, there you go everybody, that is your stupid opinions for the week. Hope you enjoyed all that craziness. Buses on fire, fucking disappointing birthday gifts. Disappointing birthday fuck gifts from your grandma. Imagine opening that at your birthday party. Oh, thanks, grandma.

It's a workbench. No it's not, grandma. It said it'sbench. No, it's not, grandma. It said it's good for people with bad knees. I knew you had bad knees. Remember that football injury? Remember that when you were a kid? Oh, you poor kid, I felt so bad for you. Yeah.

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