Your Stupid Opinions - Not Fun House, Blood Stain Motel, Strip Mall Swim School

Episode Date: October 21, 2024

This week's reviews & complaints include a traveling carnival that seems to deliver a lot less than advertised. A motel that seems less desirable than sleeping on a park bench. A very personal item that could double as a murder weapon. A swim school that doesn't seem to be able to teach kids to swim & much more!!Join comedians James Pietragallo and Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section!Subscribe and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!!!Don't forget to rate & review!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery plus subscribers can listen to your stupid opinions ad free right now join Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts Hello everybody and welcome back to Your Stupid Opinions. Hey! Hello there. Thank you so much for joining us. My name is James Petragallo. I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wissman.

We are so excited today to get into some more reviews. And by the way, next week is going to be a fun special Halloween edition. Oh shit! Where we're going to have some Halloween stuff, especially a haunted house. That is One of the greatest things that's of all time I don't know how we're gonna do anything else in the show But this haunted house because the the owner keeps going back at people really and then the owner has his own Thing that he that happens to him this crime that is insane and it's wild

So I don't know how we're gonna cover anything else. But this week, let's do this. We're gonna do some non-Halloween stuff. First of all, you know, we've been working a lot. You out there in podcast world, you've been working a lot. We've all been working a lot. What we need is some amusement, some recreation. Let's do this here.

We are gonna check out some amusement park rides. Let's do that. Where with Rainier Amusements. Rainier, Rainier like Washington. Yeah, this is in Portland, Oregon. So it's not in Washington. So it makes no sense at all. What they do, it's located in Banfield Pet Hospital for some reason. That's where I go for my Ferris wheels to the pet hospital. Well, that is one way to cheer you up when you got to put down your pots. Although you'd walk in and be like, these rides didn't do this to these

dogs, right? And that's not, this isn't like together, like, you know, this doesn't all happen on property. I hope. So Rainier remove amusements as an amusement park supplier, they say. So they supply amusement park, they make rides, they make rides here. Uh, but they also put on a show. There's a whole carnival thing. They do here Okay, here we go. Apparently it's like a Rainier amusements is a they don't they make their own but it's like a an amusement park. Okay, so Jodie gives five stars I don't know where to start honestly Which sounds like the beginning of a one-star review. It's yeah. Well, I hope you start at the beginning

Jesus the show is real nice hands down. Okay real nice I never it's a weird way to put it a real nice show From the owners to the employees. It is a good, clean, and fun carnival. Family-owned and run, and together, they make a magical midway of good food, nice rides, and lots of games to play. So come out this summer and enjoy a day at Rainier Amusements! Sure enough. Wow, that is a glowing review of Rainier Amusements here, I would say. Not bad, here's another five stars.

From Troy, I just had an amazing experience at a small traveling carnival. Small one? Small, in other words, this is like a strip mall carnival, I believe. These are the ones where my friend who smoked crack in between the rides on the Tilt-A-Whirl fucking worked. One of those, not good.

I just received and witnessed some of the best customer service I've had in years. My family was treated to a carnival Well, that's good because you went to a fucking carnival. So I would hope they were My family was treated to a cookout would have been a weird Carnival joint at a carnival very strange the staff genuinely cared about every ride They spoke about how they quote got to retrofit carnival equipment about the joy they experienced from seeing kids smile You shouldn't get that much joy from seeing kids who aren't your smile by the way. That's creepy

That's creepy, right? Yeah, I You get to like that. Hmm. We get to rework rides I get to get a wrench out and work on this thing rework rides. I get to get a wrench out and work on this thing. I get to take this duct tape off. They bragged about operating and maintaining the world's oldest traveling Ferris wheel and yo-yo ride. I bet that's not true. I bet it's not the oldest. And if it is, it's bound to get somebody hurt, right? I would, I mean, well, they have those hundred year old roller coasters, I guess as long

as you keep them up. I don't know. That's the whole Coney Island, you know what I mean? Well they have those hundred year old roller coasters, I guess as long as you keep them up. I don't know. That's the whole Coney Island, you know what I mean? I don't like seeing it go around a turn and seeing the whole track shift while you're standing next to it. I don't like hearing Wood Creek as this is going on. I don't like that in my house if the floorboard is squeaky, never mind.

My life's on the line. They bragged about that. They showed genuine happiness in a six yearyear-old girl winning a small toy. Just wow. Yeah. That is something I would not have predicted. Okay. No, I guess not.

Tiffany gives two stars. Here we go. We went to the carnival at the Strawberry Festival yesterday in Lebanon, Oregon. My son is five years old and really enjoyed the superhero and minion walkthrough. The carnival had a variety of rides for children and adults. I'm only given two stars because of the employees stationed at the minion walkthrough had very rude behavior. Didn't take any joy in a child's smile.

My kid won, not happy. Go look at my kid, he's smiling. Doesn't that bring you joy? He's like, I don't give a shit about that. I don gonna smile. Well, my kid won, not happy. Look at my kid, he's smiling. Doesn't that bring you joy? He's like, I don't give a shit about that. I don't care. Doesn't matter to me. This employee was sitting on the entrance stairs, which is fine, but he had put his empty drink containers

where children should walk through and also crossed his legs so it was more difficult for them to get through. Oh. What's he making him rub on him? This guy hates kids. He hates or really likes kids, one of the two. Stay right there.

You're not allowed to walk past him. No, no, but just rub on. Just rub on my leg, little man. It's all right. Touch me. I don't want that. Ew. Maybe, oh, he had a sour look on his face and was sleeping as well.

Well, that's a whole separate problem if he's sleeping. Maybe the employee should be provided with chairs and water. As I understand, it's hard to stand in the heat all day. But I don't think it's safe at all to put tripping objects in an already small spaced entrance. Guess not. Brianna One Star, now it gets real right here. The worst and most ghetto carnival I've ever been Brianna one star. Now it gets real right here. The worst and most ghetto

carnival I've ever been to. Ghetto. And that's saying something since I survived the 90s carnivals. She's like, I went to the one with the guy smoking meth as you went on the Tilted World. I went to Action Park, god damn it. The same Gravitron rotating around the country. Yeah. That's the way I look at it too. Like if I think, wow, this place is really janky, I've been to Action Park, so watch out, that place is bad. First of all, you're going to spend a small fortune for tickets, $50 for 120 tickets,

which sounds good until you realize that each ride is about 12 tickets. Right. So is that 10? So you're getting basically $5 a ride. Why don't you just charge $5 a ticket and one ticket a ride? What are we doing? Or just $5 a ride. How about that? Let's make it. Let's put the whole ticket fucking system aside. Stop buying tickets and selling those to us. Yeah. Let's not make this more complicated than it has to be.

I don't understand this. Do the math. Multiple broken rides being held together with tie downs and zip ties. Nope. Don't think so. Beyond frustrating and scary. Never again stay away. Just zip tie it. It'll be fine.

We need to retrofit the Ferris wheel. Dawn one star. Charging your retrofit the Ferris wheel. So, Dawn one star, charging your employees for parking is disgraceful. Well, I agree. You should do stand up, darling. Let's just say that. Remember that? Yes, I do. That's exactly what I was just thinking about. Don't organize a business and then charge people that have to be there for work to park. That's crazy. It was the, it made the least sense at the comedy club because we used to be, you know,

back in the day, we're openers at this club in Phoenix. It's a very big club and the place basically, there's only three comics in the show. There's a host, a feature and a headliner. The headliners coming in from out of town. So he's in a hotel. He doesn't have to park anywhere a lot of times the feature is too Right and the host is literally the one comic who is usually local percent gonna be driving a hundred percent gonna be driving so you'd have to park in this garage which charge like $4 an hour which an hour the time you're there basically washes what you make so

hour. The time you're there basically washes what you make so you have to run down in between your set to move the car to take it out so it doesn't charge you again because you got the first hour free it was a fucking disaster. I'm here 6 p.m. till 1 a.m. yeah do them you do the math. You do the math. So you'd have to move your car multiple times to get it driving around the block to come back in. You get the first couple hours for free right? Yeah so you do that that's a nightmare and it was there was only literally one of us and they were like nope sorry no help from you so making people work 12 to 14 hour days with barely any breaks is cruel all caps on cruel yelling at employees when they don't have their ID because you didn't have them ready for people yet because you ran out of ink is disgusting. Huh. Sounds when they don't have their ID because you didn't have them ready for people yet because you ran out of ink is disgusting.

Sounds like they don't know. Ink to print out these employee IDs. Making employees buy a hat from you to stay out of the sun is horrific. Yeah, you want to wear, if you want to have a hat. You don't give them a company issued hat? Nope. You want a hat, it's going to cost you. You got to buy some merch.

Head to the merch table, mister, there you go. Then there's all the reports of your employees not getting paid or getting paid the wrong amount. You are cheats, liars, and charlatans. Charlatans, that's a good word. I will be reporting you to the state for shady and illegal business practices. Shame on you, all caps.

Shame on you, you charlatan zip tie using fuck heads. Next up, one star. Been going to the Rainier Carnival at the Payette Apple Blossom Festival as well as the Emmet Cherry Festival for several years now. They're the number one fruit festival based carnival company in the country You got a fruit festival. We'll be there What the shit it was always satisfied for several years now was always satisfied with the experience for the kids While expensive it was worth it. Yeah, that's good This year was bad all the way around only half the rides They usually have all the really good ones were left out and there was almost none for the smaller kids. Prices for everything bordered on extortion. I don't think you know what extortion means but okay. Did they have something on you?

Wow. Given the lack of rides, the lines for the smallest rides were over a 30 minute wait. We will be passing on Rainier moving forward. Okay We can't afford to go there again They're extorting us. Oh shit Ragnar gives one star. Oh, that's a that's a run race by the way. That's like a Ragnar that they're okay. Oh, that's a run race by the way. That's like a Ragnar. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Yeah. They're less than that shit because that name does not sound like it would go with an Irish last name and they have an Irish last name. So I'll bet they're a runner. Probably. Yeah,

that sounds like an Indian Irish guy there. Now worked for them for one day and they said the checks would be sent out on the 10th of September and I still haven't gotten my check Worst place to work for they didn't even have a spot for me to work So they sent me home and said oh well I will never and said oh well you showed up and they were like yeah We don't have a spot for you today go home I will never work for them again and most of the people that do work for them don't even speak English and are most likely Illegal I didn't check or anything, but. That was a wild accusation you tossed in the end.

I'm gonna cast dispersion, so just. I'm gonna throw them out, because you owe me $12 for my fucking hour that I showed up for work. Bob gives one star, rip off prices and low quality rides. Road Ferris wheel at Redmond Derby days, the little wheel did two rotations and then

they threw you off. Way below normal carnival standards. Usually you get three to five, that's true. Carnival standards, is that an official? Yeah. County says you have to do three to five. Yeah, I mean there's USDA meat, that's a grade A, there's carnival standards, that's a different thing. They use how to judge those, Jesus Christ, what a fucking mess, man. This is a lot.

Fascinating place though, and they just set it up anywhere. Anywhere, yeah, it's a fucking fruit festival carnival. Anywhere that you grow produce, we'll be there.ival. Anywhere that you grow produce will be there. We will be there if you grow fruit. I'll tell you that. Christian, one star, they hire temp employees who don't care. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I thought they took joy in a child's smile. Much different.

They were Justin Salem. A lady was doing cotton candy and she had no gloves on and picked her nose. Oh no. And kept grabbing and stuffing the cotton candy. There you go. There's a booger in there somewhere. Find it. If you find the booger, you win a giant stuffed animal or a Led Zeppelin mirror. One of the two.

That's mostly sweet. There's a little salty in there. A little salty in there. A little salty. You're going to want the change of texture. Let me tell you, you're going to want that. Another employee was very rude to my uncle because he had a lot of tickets

and interrupted another employee. And my uncle telling him to go to the back of the line. Please waste your own money on this company if they come to your town. I mean, please don't waste your money. Please waste your money. That's why I want it. Here we go. A gives one star. Absolutely worst experience at a fair in 30 years. This person has been going for 30 years. He's a carnival, a strip mall carnival enthusiast, this guy. Just finally found his last straw.

Yeah, that's it. I've had it now. Some rides were down or half busted down. And lines? Question mark. What lines? They didn't even have anybody guide the masses into lines, so there were just random crowds around the ride.

Oh, just milling about. They didn't even have stanchions set up. That is wild. You have got to set up stanchions or else people will... Oh, they'll just walk right in. If you set up a system, people will follow it generally. If you don't, it'll just be a mob scene. Oh, I guess it's just, it's a disaster.

And you have to set that up at the very beginning because... It's the airport, otherwise. Yeah, otherwise it's just people wandering around. They're not going to do what you just told them to do. And the airport too, all these airlines have set up stanchions. This is for this group, this is for that group. Nobody does it. They just all stand in a fucking mass and then rush this fucking poor lady at the same time. It's also because every fucking airline has to do their own thing and have it all different and just do the same thing so we all know what to do. Standard, standard boarding procedures. Yeah, and it's not posts in the middle of the airport with numbers on them that people stand next to. No, it's crazy. I hate that more than anything.

Let's just say soldiers, kids, first class, fucking first 10 rows, whatever the fuck, I don't care. Do it that way. Whatever you're doing. Yeah, front to back. Let's do it. So this person though, not quite getting that here. Random crowds, two hours of trying to locate Do it. Whatever you're doing. Yeah. Front to back. Let's do it. So this person though, not quite getting that here.

Random crowds, two hours of trying to locate a single ride we could get on. My son's heart visibly breaking, we gave up. What? Visibly breaking. Listen, kid, if you can't get over the fact that you can't ride the fucking yo-yo, you're not going to last long in this world. I'm sorry. Visibly breaking.

Visibly breaking. This is a lesson for your child. For sure. Yeah. This is the, listen, can't always get what you want. Yeah. And he needs it. You can try sometimes, which you might find.

Yeah. You get a booger and a cotton candy instead. You get just what you need. Which is booger and a cotton candy and just what's in which is booger and a cotton candy. Oh My god, that's amazing. Okay, Jason one star wife just worked for them on Saturday in Moses Lake I love hearing from the employees by the way, that's my favorite cuz they're fucking bitter. They're way more better I didn't spend one afternoon. Yeah, I didn't work a few extra hours of overtime. So my wife doesn't have to go through this I I lazily said get a job at the carnival Yeah, I didn't work a few extra hours of overtime so my wife doesn't have to go through this.

I lazily said get a job at the carnival. Or she was like, that sounds fun. Kids around. And he's like, yeah, sure, go ahead. I'm going to play golf that day anyway, so whatever. From Moses Lake, Washington, which I think we did a small town murder episode in Moses Lake, it sounds familiar, from 10 a.m. until 11 p.m. at night. Wow. That's 13 hours.

That's too long. That's a long time. Gave her very few breaks. Expected my wife to return the next day for another 10 hours. My wife suffered heat exhaustion and sunburns. They would not transfer her to another location for work. And when it came time to pay, the lady lied and said she had to send her to HR before she could pay and made my wife wait until 930 at night on a Sunday and gave her cash that the lady was the HR person he said you have to see HR who is me and then she turned around with a hat on now

I'm the HR lady I wasn't before but now I am. Holy fucking shit. They promised my wife $15 an hour. They only paid her $135. Excuse me but 13 hours is $195. There was no taxes taken out. They removed an hour for lunch. Okay, can handle that but then deducted her two 15 minutes from her pay as well.

Illegal. Very corrupt business, like bad business practices, and they treat their workers like shit! Five exclamation points. Like a carnival? Like a carnival, yeah. Like you'd expect a roaming carnival to...

Right. To a roving fucking shitstorm. Tell you one thing and it's actually another. I imagine so. To take breaks out and then you don't take taxes out is like you can't do that. That's not either we're doing all illegal or we're doing all above board but we're not doing a little of both. That's crazy. We're not doing a little bit of both that benefits you only. No, no and

that adds 15 thumbs up that review too. So this is apparently a common experience here. Here we go. Tierra, one star. They came to Boise, Idaho and we were so excited for a fucking strip mall carnival. What is going on in Boise? Isn't there more than that going on? Isn't there like a theme park of some sort? I don't know. You've got a college with a football team with a blue field.

That's interesting. Do something. I don't know. There's got to be something better than this. But when we got there, there by the way, T-H-E-I-R of course, was horrible all caps. They had five or six rides and they were very run down. Plus the people in charge of the music were playing very explicit and disrespectful music. It's all in caps for this being a children's event. Go shorty. Yeah. It's your Yeah, they're playing fucking wet ass pussy while the kids are like, I don't know about this.

I was shocked and we ended up leaving after one ride. And that's why they did it. They know what's happening up here. You guys are all uptight Mormons. We're gonna fucking embarrass you today. Let's fucking do it. Plus, I mean, let's be honest, all the people that work at this place

Are probably trash for the most part so right and they want you to think about wet macaroni in the pot And they play that shit in front of their little kids They're like wait, what's the difference? Jesse one star horrible fun house. Oh Not fun apparently It had it had four mirrors in it and one missing. That's not a funhouse. It sounds like a lot of women's closets.

Sounds like somebody ran into it and they haven't fixed it yet. Holy crap. Five dollars per person and they didn't even have lights on. Why do they even run this thing? They can't even invest in anything in refurbishing their quote amusements. Do not waste your money. Okay. The problem is you came in here thinking this was going to be like Disneyland with pristine rides and clean costumes. No, that's not what this is.

Disneyland's $120 to get in. This place is $5. And these places, these costumes haven't been watched since they were new so Have a have a good time and laugh about how it's not Disneyland and what how it's so different And explain to your kids that this is what money You get what you pay for see we paid very little and you're not having a lot of fun, right? That's a requisite amount of fun for what we paid. If we went to Disney World, I'd expect you to have a shit-eating grin plastered on your face,

because it cost me a small fortune. I went into debt for this. Well, you smelled cinnamon from the fucking open gate. You better have a huge smile and rock hard nipples the whole time we're fucking there. Let me tell you something. Because this is ridiculous. Man.

I paid less for this than I would pay you allowance this week. You better not have fun. No fun. I didn't even, you didn't have fun? Well that's good, because I didn't buy any. I didn't buy any fun. See how that works?

Kids, this is a lesson in life, is what we're teaching right now. You pay very little, you get very little. Yeah. That hot dog I bought you, it was a dollar 50. It sucked, right? It was terrible. Had like wood chips in it and shit. Yeah. That's what happens. Dollar 50. If I paid $4 for a good hot dog, you'd have enjoyed it. Okay. So we tried to have fun. It didn't work out. We didn't have the money. We just couldn't afford the fun. Couldn't afford fun, so we didn't exist. So you know what we'll do? Let's swim.

Swimming is the thing. But the problem is, we don't know how to swim. No, we need some lessons. No, we're going to need lessons, so we've got to find out how to swim now. That's our next goal here. So we're going to go to the Blake Swim School, which is on, let's see, it's in Hacienda Heights, California. All right.

By the way, I meant to say this and forgot at the beginning, but the carnival has, let me look at its stars on Google, has 2.3 stars on Google. That's not good. So when you look that up, expect to be disappointed. Expect shit. This place has 3.4 stars, which doesn't sound great either for a swim school Yeah, I mean unless your kid drowns right all you got to do five stars right keep them above water That's five stars keep them afloat here. So this one here

Let's start out five stars My two kids really love to come to the Blake Swim School to learn their swimming skills. This is the indoor pool, so we aren't worried about the weather, whatever is hot or cold, since the pool is always warm, and we can sit inside to wait kids.

You gotta wait those kids. By the way, again, this is a very Asian name on here, so this might not be English as a first language here. I sent my older son this language here. I sent my older son this school since May. I sent my older son this school, sent him the school, since May 2018 once a week. After the pandemic, my little son started to learn from last summer of 2021. Both kids enjoy learning with their coach. As parents, we are very glad to have the Blake swim school in our living area, which is close and convenient to send kids here

You I have to show you a picture of this because the school it looks like you know how in a strip mall There's just like storefronts and they go back. It'll be like a little convenience store smoke shop You know what I mean? This looks like they crammed a an indoor swimming pool into a smoke shop of a convenience store. Look at this Yeah, this the deck It's a storefront Yeah Of like a smoke shop take all the cigarettes and bongs out and put an indoor pool in there that dig the foundation

Three feet around a halo of concrete walking area. there are there's two feet of deck all around it That's the whole area. That's everything they have and the rest is just a pool Wow. That's a wild picture, man Okay, five stars both of my children attended Blake swimming school for private lessons coach Blake and coach May are professional and very strategic We've tried many swimming schools. Dude, how many swimming schools is it? How long did it take you to learn how to swim? I think I learned how to swim in about a half hour. I'll tell you this, I didn't learn from a school.

No, no, not at all. Someone taught me in a half hour in an above ground pool in Beacon, New York somewhere when I was a kid. I remember. I learned at the lake that they put life jackets on us and threw us in and then told us when you feel comfortable take it off. Oh man you had life jackets? You're fucking lucky. Well yeah it was a 50 foot deep lake. They just said air is up.

Shit okay. Come up when you need debris. Yeah exactly, exactly. Kick, and they go, just kick, kick. Okay. Yeah, what crazy advice is that? Kick, okay, ah. I was just kicking like a fucking crazy. But you know what, I figured it out. I don't know how many fucking times it takes these kids to learn.

Wow, luckily we found Blake's swimming school this summer. After 10 sessions, both of my kids got accepted by the Chino Hills Aquatics. Oh boy, the rigorous accepted by the Chino Hills Aquatics. Oh boy, the rigorous standards of the Chino Hills Aquatics. Yeah, that's famous, we're all over. I would highly recommend Blake Swimming School for all ages. Hopefully children, because as an adult you should probably be able to do it. It's really amazing how many people can't.

It's wild. I know a lot of people who can't swim. It's I don't understand it I really don't weird. Yeah, it's such a that's such a Just a body of water could kill you like you need to at least keep a float It's crazy to not to just go well if I fall in I die I guess like what you better stay off boats Cuz I'm not looking around for who can and can't swim man No boats pools lakes rivers everywhere. Yeah, there's a lot of water and people tend to like them. Yeah In Arizona, there's everybody has a goddamn pool. I mean, yeah, it's in every backyard

There's maybe 10% backyards that don't have pools. Yeah, even shithouses have pools. Yeah terrible houses. They're terrible Yeah, yeah don't have pools. Yeah even shit houses have pools. Yeah terrible houses. They're terrible pools but they have them. Yeah. In-ground pools. Yeah. So here's one star. The school itself gets one star. The place itself is dirty. The bathrooms are hardly ever stocked with essentials and in the 16 weeks I've been there. Why are you there for 16 weeks? What the fuck? 16 weeks I've been there. Dirty water puddles on the floor. They will make you... oh, dirty water puddles on the floor. They will make you, oh no, management will not speak in English. Apparently Blake doesn't speak English.

They assign the coach and if for whatever reason it's not working out, they will not refund the sessions because in their opinion, they provided an instructor so their responsibility was met. That's when they don't speak English, when you're like, I'm not satisfied. I don't know what you're talking about They do not see the swim lessons as a responsibility of theirs. They say that's the coach Now in all honesty, most of the coaches are pretty good We started out with one that did not work out with my child. We lost out on four lessons You should have been a champion by then. No kidding. Four lessons?

That's plenty. I requested someone else and got an angel. Elsie was patient and great. She would get five stars. But not the rest of this fucking show. When did you get your kids swimming? Early. They had a babysitter who had a pool.

And so the babysitter taught them to swim. I mean, they were swimming from the time they were toddlers. They were swimming. Yeah, I took mine and put them in a swim class like this. And in the second week, they were both swimming. Yeah. I think literally it was like one day they went to the babysitters and the next day she was like,

oh, they swim now. Oh, great. By the way, they swim. Yeah, cool. By the way, your children are now aquatic. Yeah, that's pretty awesome. Thanks. Good stuff. Good shit here, your children are now aquatic. Yeah, that's pretty awesome. Oh, great. Thanks. Good stuff, good shit here.

So one star from Sean, do not come to Blake's swim school, all caps, three exclamation points, most horrible swim school ever. What happened? All caps, four exclamation points. They held their kid underwater. He means it more than the first sentence.

Yeah, unless your kid drowned here, no need for the caps, chief. Right, calm down. This is the most horrible school I've ever experienced. He means it more than the first sentence. Yeah, unless your kid drowned here. No need for the caps chief This is the most horrible school I've ever experienced the teacher will be late without noticing Well who doesn't notice you don't notice or he doesn't notice and the admin people here Christina and Amy have the most horrible attitude toward any parents complain I guess complaints my son got put into a teacher training lesson using our own purchased class without noticing ahead I don't know what that means the teachers spent time talking during my son's class time Probably, you know giving them some you could just throw them in the pool. I guess watch them sink to the bottom

And I start I stated because my son is an entry-level learner for his safety and learning time I'd prefer not to be put into those training classes. The crazy Christina and Amy, now they're crazy. Yeah. Now they're crazy. Stared at me and yelled with nonstop excuses. Yeld who yells excuses. That's weird. I don't know what the excuses are about. Excuses about being crazy or I think about what there why you're not satisfied Yeah, this is why I'm crazy. Do you understand?

My dad left when I was five. Okay, all right He'll be back So they said saying it's not up to the parents choice. It's up to the school's decision They would allow they would even allow me as a parent who paid for the lesson to finish my words. I guess wouldn't is what they're going for. Then my complaint letter to the school got no response at all. On top of this horrible attitude issue, the school environment is super dirty. We saw cockroach at the entry. Outside or inside? You can't help what's outside.

I don't think English is this person's first language either. I really doubt it, yeah, and his name's Sean, so I don't know what to... Or he's just very dumb. Very dumb, it doesn't write well. And the entry at the entry, and the restroom is horrible, pee everywhere. Pee everywhere.

There will be pee. I'm surprised you're not doing it in the pool. That's why, yeah, that's shocking, that that's shocking that that's happy that it's in there Yeah, filled with urine man. We were fooled with their advertisement for professional teachers however with eight hundred dollars spent eight hundred dollars for 16 weeks or for I'm sorry you don't it does not not cost $800 to teach a child to swim. It costs an hour in a fucking pool to teach a kid to swim. That's it. An hour.

There you go, kid. Kick. Keep kicking. That's right. Alright, you'll float eventually. Teach him to float and you're good. Kick! Kick! I'm trying! My son learned nothing but only experienced dirty environment and horrible service attitude Yeah, okay. There's a dead roach on this next one. So really it's inside. Yeah, there's a picture of it

Esther gives one star Blake swim school is the worst school I've ever experienced Horrible service attitude teachers late without notice dirty environment. You name they have it you name it they have it that Service late teachers you name it they got it not only we wasted our money here learning nothing But also got yelled at by the admin people which is out of my imagination Do not come to the school everybody here speaks so bizarre. What is it like? Stepford wives like robots a lot of these people have Asian last names, by the way. Okay, yeah. I think this is might be. That's gotta be it.

Yeah, I think this might be a lot of Asian clientele here. Maybe an Asian neighborhood, I don't know. It has to, I think that's what's going on here. Alex, again with an Asian last name, one star, my son learned 20 lessons here a half a year ago. Yeah, we don't usually say a half a year ago in this country. No. That's not an American terminology. And we don't usually say a half a year ago in this country. That's not a that's not an American terminology.

And we don't say learn 20 lessons. They say attended or paid for 20 lessons here. Whatever. My son did 20 lessons here earlier this year, six months ago, whatever you want. And his skills have not changed. 20 lessons. I feel like you've got a bad kid. Dude, either your kid is dumb and completely uncoordinated or these teachers don't do shit because 20 lessons You should have the kids doing synchronized swimming pyramids by then right? It should certainly swimming should certainly not be a challenge for them. No they should certainly have some skills I would goddamn hope so now his father has taught him five times in his own swimming pool.

Yeah, because that's what you should have done to begin with rather than paying for 20 lessons. He's made a lot of technical progress. My son said that he learned nothing from swimming at this address before. Moreover, the sanitary environment at this address is very poor. I like how it's always at this address, not here. And the female boss has a bad attitude. It is female boss. It is not recommended to stay here.

To study here. Not to stay here. To study. Studying, swimming. I take back this star. If I... we've heard a lot of them. I like that better. We've heard a lot. If I could give no stars I would. This is, I take back this star. I like this, that's the key to that sentence. I take back this star. I want, I rescind this star with one star. That's beautiful. Oh my God, Carlos one star.

Go find better coaches as long as it is not, all caps, coach Amira. Oh, Amira's the problem. She's a bitch, Amira, apparently. Jay gives one star, awful to say the least, and scary being honest. I have tried on multiple occasions to call and they will not answer or respond to voicemail. The ceiling does not look safe at all and is super rusted. To be honest, it looks like it can fall.

Seems like a tragedy waiting to happening. Waiting to happening. Waiting to happening? Waiting to happening. And what's the scary part, just the ceiling? The ceiling is rusted. Okay. It's probably steel beams that are, you know, those,

it's fine. They're fine. It's fine, they're 100% fine. Calm down. It's also very, it's very humid in here. Oh yeah. And there's chemicals in the air your eyes are kind of burning Everything's fine. I assure you. It's fucking ridiculous. Yeah, don't don't worry about it. Here is one star from ye

one star not recommended Exclamation point having been taking classes for a few months. No process at all. I think progress is what they're probably going for. I don't think English is this person's first language. Only have private class I can understand, but the teacher was talking to another person the whole 30 minutes. Well they had great tits, that's why. I'm sorry. That's probably what happened there.

And my kid just play side. That's beyond the pale. Play side, god damn it. Just play side. Oh, not to, that's beyond the pale. Play side, god damn it. Just play side, bullshit. And no supervisor to watch. So rude to kid. Ridiculous place. There we go.

Here's this, now it's getting real here. AY gives one star. If you want your kids got beaten up by the instructor then send them there then Being up did Charlie day right that read that yeah, that definitely sounds like Charlie Kelly fucking Tennis do why Dennis is bad, man If you want your kids got beaten up by the instructor. It's not even instructor, the instructor, which I don't even know what that is. Sounds like he pulls teeth out while he's in there. The instructor, the wrestling cat. I'm the instructor. Come on over here

and get instructed tonight, baby. Me and you at the garden. It's DDT season and the instructor is the man to deliver it terrible and the worst place you can ever find the instructor loves to abuse child loves it the instructor I'm the instructor I will abuse your child in a pool the instructor and I'll take your belt no wrestling tag team I'll eat your children after I instruct them he's gonna eat them. After I instruct them in the pool. He's gonna eat them. Holy shit, man. This is amazing. This is great.

Next up, one star, not recommended. The environment is very bad, very dirty. Female boss attitude is not good. The female boss. Female boss. She is some shit this lady. Very arrogant and unreasonable. Maybe she's the instructor.

She's the instructor. I'm the instructor. What do you want from me? Keep a woman around to beat the shit out of the kids because it's, being honest, it's less enforceable by the law. If a lady does it, more people are forgiving. Yeah, definitely. If they're, if they're instructing, it's much better.

Claudia one star, very short. Filthy place, rude people. Yeah, that's good. Here is Ryan one star and this is translated from original which was Chinese. So this is translated from Chinese. The new swimming coach, Amara, is particularly bad. We've heard that a couple times about Amara. coach Amara is particularly bad. We've heard that a couple times about Amara. She stands on the edge of the pool and teaches. She is not nice and always has a straight face. She doesn't even get wet. She doesn't even jump in the pool. Kick. No, you drowning boy. Kick. Yeah. Kick harder. You're going to drown. Keep your head above the water so you can hear me. You can't listen if you're underwater, sweetheart me You can't listen if you're underwater sweetheart

You can't listen if you're drowning it always has a straight face After one class the children's enthusiasm was completely gone, please improve the quality of individual Coaches right and have them get a swimsuit and put their ass in the water. I figured yeah How would you how would you do that without? You got to hold them you got to go. Okay now this way and you yeah, you got to hold their legs up No, don't get down there make sure yeah, put your hand under the belly and go move your do this Yeah, your legs kick it now do them at the same time. I'm gonna let go you do it. What the fuck I Did do that with my dog one time

You do it. What the fuck? I had to do that with my dog one time. To teach your dog to swim? Frankie hadn't been in a pool in a little while in Arizona, and she loves the water, but she like forgot how to swim. Oh, did her ass just sink? No, no, she just was like trying to go off the ledge, but couldn't figure out what to do with her paws. So I took her two paws, and I moved them like swimming motion, and and she looked at me and then did it and fucking swam around Yeah, two seconds. So my dog is smarter than your stupid fucking 20 lesson kid Well, I did literally I took her paws and I went like this pull them up and did that like a bicycle just

And did it with my hands see that and that's what she did It's called a doggy paddle. Do you know why dip shit? Cuz you're a fucking dog So Lily one star the coaches attitude was very arrogant. This is also in Chinese originally He had a good attitude when collecting the money, but it was different after collecting the money. Yeah, that's What's it got your money this swimming pool was dirty and the bathrooms was dirty Once they got your money this swimming pool was dirty and the bathrooms was dirty And was and then finally joy one star very short don't come to class or you will regret it. Yeah. Oh Wait credit jesus. That sounds like a threat. Yeah

Come in this day. Yeah the instructor the instructor tells you not to come here. You'll regret it. I will You will pay okay, so we've been there my god, we don't know how to swim We got instructed. We have no idea how to swim still which is rough I have no idea how to swim we are we've been in the Sun all day from working for very little money at a carnival We do own water wings we're tired I think wings. We're tired, I think, at the end of that. Let's rest our weary heads. Where? Lay our weary heads to rest here at the Guest Host Motel. Oh.

Which the picture is just a picture of the St. Louis Arch. The Guest Host? Is it in St. Louis? It is in. It is 1920 North Grand Boulevard, St. Louis, Missouri. Apparently within viewing distance of the arch here. It has, let's see, 2.4 stars on Google. That's not good. And it's a two-star hotel. I didn't know that existed.

I thought three-star was... That's the beginner, right? That was a condo lodge, is the three-star. How the fuck are you a two star motel? Two star hotel. I mean, you get them for different amenities, but I don't know what they are. I imagine pool is one, right?

I don't know. I don't know how that works. I thought it was quality, service, cleanliness. Quality service, pool, and then other amenities, right? Amenities, spas, restaurants. And a restaurant. I think that's it, right? I would hope so.

What else do you need? So Richard gives five stars. Fast and simple and everything that was needed. Gentleman at the office was very accommodating and I do appreciate the great service. The room was very clean and together, although the air conditioning unit was a bit awkward with how it ran.

Other than that, I was satisfied. What does that mean? I don't know. You need to elaborate on what, the only thing my hotel has to have, guaranteed, obviously, clean bathroom, but an air conditioner that goes to like fucking 60 and works great.

That's all I care about. Hold as fuck. Every hotel, when we're on the road, everyone we walk into, walk right up to it. Hold that down button. How low does that go? Great. Freeze my shit out,

because that's how I can sleep. As far as it goes, and I'll lay down. Yeah, and I'll feel very, even in the winter. Let's get it cold in here. I don't give a shit. Okay, next one here, we'll do the five stars again. Here we go, Madison. Good place to go when you have nowhere else

Okay, that sounds like either it was either here or the homeless shelter so I went here right I had 40 bucks Yeah rooms have comfy beds showers and lots of mirrors Well, that's always how you can tell class. As well as a TV. Oh they have a TV in there? Oh shit! Whoa! This is a high class hotel room. I didn't expect a TV. Microwave is located under the stairs. What? I don't think it's in your room. I think it's... In the hall. In the hallway. You just go out and microwave something. Outdoors. This is the best line. And if you ask for the office for ice, they often provide it. Not all the time.

Sometimes. Often. Very often. I get it. Sometimes, you know, that's okay. Okay, Charlie Five Stars. It was quiet and quaint if you aren't afraid of diving into a rich culture of poverty-stricken inner- city people.

Not a nice neighborhood. Yeah, it sounds like the last, the last bastion before homeless. Yes, I think that's what it is. I think the first step above from it. Above homeless. Yeah, this is, this is halfway house people right here. You know, it'd been worse. So this is a happy thing for them. Well, it's nowhere near a school.

So the child molesters can stay here, which is good. It's the proper distance from a school or church, so they can, it's the only place they can really stay altogether like that. St. Louis has that DMZ area. Yeah, oh yeah, it is. Where it goes from maintained, and then they just gave the fuck up.

And this is probably when they gave the fuck up and this is probably never mind the fuck up i would think so yeah the rooms are cold and the water is hot the staff is nice and the people are beautiful okay i don't need beautiful people from my motel first of all that's the funniest review i've ever heard sounds like he's doing like a cultural study or something. I went down. The rich diversity of the myriad of ethnicities and languages being spoken. It's a real melting pot, this hotel. I just want to know if the toilet's clean. I don't give a shit what people are doing outside.

Doesn't matter to me. People are beautiful. One star from Daniel. This is the worst hotel slash motel I've ever stayed in. This is a motel, sir. It's right in the name. It's in a terrible part of town that feels completely unsafe. That's because it is.

It's St. Louis DMC. Yeah. That's because it is unsafe. There's a good reason for that. Stay the fuck out of there. The quote office is just the owner sitting behind bulletproof bar glass. Bulletproof and bars, just in case. It's not a bank, it's a fucking hotel.

Not much, what do you have back there? People must just shoot for fun in this neighborhood. What are the rates here? They can't be bulletproof glass and bars rates, right? They have to. I think it's cheap as shit here. With no speakers so you can't hear anything he says. He's just yelling through bulletproof glass.

This is a nightmare. You haven't even gotten the room yet. And you're like, what? Drill some holes in this fucking thing so I can talk to you. I said I need ice. That's why they often provide it. The times they don't thing so I can talk to you. I said I need ice That's why they often provide it the times they donor cuz they couldn't hear you. No, I don't need eyes. I have to I'm good No, oh my god, this is fucking wild I made a booking gave him my ID through a drawer and it took him at least 10 minutes to find it while I just stood there in silence waiting for him to do something. His own drawer. No attempt whatsoever at customer service. When I finally got my room key and entered the room,

it was somehow even worse than I had expected. Reeked of smoke, mold and water damage, visible everywhere, holes in the comforter and sheets, paint peeling, cracks in the floor of the shower slash bathtub that felt like they may give out at any moment. TV didn't work. You get the picture. Yeah, yeah a flop house crack motel. That's where you're at. You shouldn't have to pay for that. No, but this is this is one of those motels and there's a lot of what Phoenix has a ton of these hotels boy Do they that most of the people there are long-term? semi homeless semi employed usually crackheads or alcoholics or either either

functioning drug addict or substance abuse somehow or Rehabilitating from that either on the way down or on the way up. But they all cross right there. It's an intersection. Or like a mom with four kids that just got out of like an abuse shelter or something like that. That's who lives in these places.

It's tough. It's a tough fucking world here. It's not easy. I left to go see the city and when I came back a couple hours later, my room key didn't work. Somebody stole my locks and foot nails. Jesus. Good thing I got back before the owner decided to go to bed. later, my room key didn't work. Somebody stole my locks and put them in there.

Okay, Jesus. Good thing I got back before the owner decided to go to bed. Apparently there's no late shift here. When he let me back into my room, it was clear that someone had been in there while I was gone, which I think was the owner himself as far as I could tell. He's just like, let me, let's go take a peek around and see what he's got. There weren't many- I happened to still have that key in my pocket. Oh, I'm sorry.

There weren't many other guests there, but the ones who were there played music on the balcony out loud in the early morning. Oh no. I would give worse than one star if I could. I take back the star. I rescind my star. Holy shit, okay, Alan one star.

This area to begin with is in all caps, extremely unsafe. And I highly recommend not staying here. Then he gives a, this is amazing, a timeline of the evening, which I love a timeline. 104 AM. One oh four. Six gunshots in distance. Oh my God. Okay, at least it's in in distance. Oh my god.

Okay, at least it's in the distance. 321 am. Fighting with boyfriend and girlfriend who were spending the night right next door to my room. The boyfriend caught the girl cheating and left her and drove away in his car. He heard the whole argument because of the thin walls. I don't think they were fighting man. He was like, you whore and drove. Yeah

428 a.m. Girlfriend of above yelling over the phone. I'm assuming to her boyfriend. Oh my god 602 a.m. Car alarm of a truck going off next to my car 638 a.m. Loud car started loud car started a few rows after my car to top it off Claims on Expedia that dogs are allowed don't buy into it because they will charge you a $50 per fee Yeah, yeah dogs are allowed you expect to pay a fee a lot of places allowed is doesn't mean free no exactly I I assume there's a fee you know what I mean? I have I absolutely hated my stay And I highly recommend for everyone not to stay here the room smelled like smoke the place was dirty

Curtain curtains barely hanging on burnt cigarette butts in the curtain and on the blanket Just cigarette butts in the curtains. How does that work? In the curtains Wow worst experience of my life at a motel. As I said, do not check into this place. All caps, four exclamations. You will never check out is what this is. I stayed at a hotel in Cleveland that I opened the curtains and found drywall.

Yeah, that's amazing. There's no window. But you know what, that's the Cleveland guarantee. No view ever. Nothing's gonna make sense here. You're like, if you see the city, you'll just hate it worse. Trust me. This wall is the best we have to offer you in terms of a view in this town.

Piece of shit. Cornelius One Star, do not stay here. The manager is absolutely nuts. Three exclamation points. You'll be the only one checked in and he'll constantly knock on your door and hang in Do not stay here, the manager is absolutely nuts! You'll be the only one checked in and he'll constantly knock on your door and hang in the room underneath you to spy on you all day. The guy is just a psychopath. Maybe he just needs friends.

He sounds lonely. So what's he up to? Get the fuck out of my room! That's what I'm up to. Can we just hang out today? Please! It's just me and you. Jesus's what I'm up to just hang out today, please Don't want to hang out imagine what BTK would have done with this guy like listen I'm here to set up an extremely elaborate pulley system so I can masturbate and choke myself at the same time

Unless you're willing to help. I really don't need you here. Hey yourself useful bar your finger to tie this I really don't need you here. Okay, so Useful bar your finger to tie this I'm real bad at knots. It's my only weakness Levada gives one star. I'm not sure how they are getting away with this. I guess we'll find out what This place is the most disgusting place I've ever been the room was filthy The toilet stopped up, and they wouldn't even fix it or let me use another one. I got sick to my stomach because I couldn't use the bathroom. Wait what?

What? That's not how that works. You kept all your waste in because you couldn't flush it? Apparently. You gotta go somewhere and let that out. You're gonna get sick. He's gonna shit in the tub or something this guy. I don't know what's happening. You gotta put get sick. It's gonna shit in the tub or something, this guy. I don't know what's happening. You gotta put it somewhere. I want to know how I can report this place. Guess what?

You have. You have. We just did. Julia one star, the worst motel I've ever stayed at. Absolutely disgusting. The neighborhood is sketchy and it's really run down. The sheets and comforter were stained and had holes in them from cigarettes.

I was given a smoking room even though I don't smoke and it smelled terrible. They were like, it's all smoking. Don't worry about it. I saw a mouse on the floor. At least I hope it was a mouse. Let's hope so. Was it still alive? Yeah, I guess it scurried.

The heater was broken and when I say broken, I don't mean it just don't mean it didn't work. I mean it looked as though someone had smashed it in and set it on fire. It will never work again. I hated it here and if I can stop even one person from choosing this motel, I feel it's my duty to do so. I've done my job. I've done my job as a human. Holy shit, this is fucking amazing.

There's so many, there's so fucking many of, like there's pictures of blood and shit. Let's go to this review. This is on like TripAdvisor, I think these, so they have titles. Crack House Motel is the one, one star. This is not a hotel. No, it's not. It's a motel. Big difference. This is a dump! It was too unsafe and unsanitary to stay in. The walls were stained and the

mattress was stained and there was no sheets on the bed. No sheets at all? Wait, what? You shouldn't be able to see the mattress. I would hope not. Looked like it hadn't been cleaned in ages the outside was awful The pictures they posted are a gross misrepresentation of this place Yeah, yeah brand new 1971 here is a guy with fucking big mutton shop sideburns and Next to a 71 Cadillac a lot of fringe hanging off his suede jacket thumbs up Holy shit the outs of the pictures are gross right our presentation

Okay, it was scary and not clean at all could not stay due to these factors had reserved it for three nights For a family member who was trying to stay close to a sick loved one at B C a BJC and their website pics didn't look too bad. It's a lie! Definitely do not reserve anything here. We were afraid we would get sick from how dirty the room was. They had to leave and I'll deal with my credit card company to get some of my money back. Then do not stay here one star. our arrival to our two-star hotel You knew before you booked this though. Yeah when you paid

54.99 for a fucking room you knew what to expect you just do don't expect anything comfortable We realized how quickly the decision we made to stay here was wrong But it was 1230 a.m. And we were exhausted the decision we made to stay here was wrong. But it was 1230 a.m. and we were exhausted. My husband went in first and the first thing he saw were dirty sheets and pillowcases as well as cigarette burns in the sheets. We went back to the front desk and asked for clean sheets. My husband came back with a clean sheet and quickly had to turn around to get another sheet and some pillowcases. While he did that, I started peeling back the comforter in order to start the sheet changing process.

Just as I got to the bottom of where the comforter was, I think we know what's happening here. What curled out of there. A little friend was found on the sheet. It wasn't a big, that would have been somewhat understandable. No, it was the top of a hypodermic needle. Oh no. It wasn't a big, it wasn't a bug, as they were saying. That would have been somewhat understandable. No, it was the top of a hypodermic needle. Oh no! It wasn't a big, it wasn't a bug, as they're saying. That would have been

somewhat understandable. That was the top of a hypodermic needle. Upon my husband's return to the room, he informed me that the owner named Tony told him it was too late to be providing this kind of service. Hold on. Here's some sheets. You don't have the bed-making materials? No, I'm sorry. Come back in the morning. Where's the rest of this hypodermic needle? Because I don't want to climb into bed and find it with my bottom of my foot. That's my question. Where's the rest of the needle? Where's the rest of the needle? That's wild. My husband informed him that we had come into clean sheets and had no signs of drugs being used.

We would have accepted it. That would have been fine. The place is absolutely filthy with mouse droppings, pills shoved in holes, pills? And crayon writing to let you know which side of the shower for hot and cold water. What the fuck? Is the R backward? Yeah, what is happening right there? That is crutch. L backward for cold.

Tony sent his son in there, mark all the bathrooms. We didn't wanna stay, but we were exhausted and it was 1 a.m. by the time we got things situated. And finally falling asleep, we get a random knock in the door about 2 a.m. He's like, what you guys doing? Hey, can I jam some pills in your holes? Jesus, no clue who the person was, but he just kept knocking.

Finally he decided to walk away. The moral of the story is this is a rent by the hour kind of place. So not a great part of town. It's disgustingly dirty. And the guy running the place is a jerk. You bet. That was probably the guy looking for his hypodermic needle. That's why he was at 2am. Hey, you guys find anything? Rashad one star. They only accept cash. Clearly a cover up in parenthesis. Of course the little kid working the desk didn't mention that until I had arrived.

Had an attitude and he's lucky I have things to do tonight. You're going to fight a little kid? He just said he's this motherfucker have things to do tonight. You're gonna fight a little kid He just said he's a this motherfucker lucky. I'm busy tonight This is great. That's why I'm bulletproof glass. He's a dick And then he says quote his glasses slash nose are already broken and I can see why oh He's pulling a punch a kid He wants to punch a fucking kid. We'll do one last one here. MT, there's so many good ones here though, but I want to get to the personal. You know what, we're going to do a couple more of these and personal item we'll get to whatever we can. One out of five stars, I pulled up with my toddler to guys

wolf whistling at me by the front office. That's what you want. What's up, baby? They probably, in their defense, 93% of the other women in this area are probably prostitutes. It's possible, yeah. You know what I mean? They probably thought you were for sale, even with a kid, I don't know. I felt 100% uncomfortable, not that they should be yelling, but whatever.

I felt 100% uncomfortable. But if you're gonna cat call anybody, I guess a prostitute would be the person to do it to. That's how you do it, yeah. That's like driving by McDonald's going, good burgers, you know what I mean? Yeah. I guess. You got a nice Big Mac there.

Let's see, I felt 100% uncomfortable before I even got the keys, as I would do. I had already booked and paid for the room, but I was half tempted to bite the cost and go elsewhere. Had it not been storming and had I not driven 9 hours already, I'd have left. Dark rooms, no light in the shower and toilet area, no door to the bathroom, sheet protectors coming off the mattresses, I always check the beds when we stay somewhere. I never give negative ratings Only plus was the AC worked nicely

Yeah, that's no door on the bathroom. That's fucked up. That is yeah, you can't have that That's I don't even want that barn door Jesus Christ Finally frosted raccoon here one star what they say? There was literally blood on our pillow. God damn it. Asked for a new pillow, offered us a pillowcase to cover it. Are you kidding me? Nah, just back it up. Nope, disease is gonna crawl right through those fibers,

I'm sorry. Vile disgusting, wouldn't even bother listening to us about a refund so we could go somewhere else. Do not book with children with children with anybody It's fucked. There's fucking blood and here's a picture of it. Oh, that's definitely. Oh my god. It's so much blood It's not a drop somebody no suicide This was a really bloody pillow and they just washed the blood off and now there's just a name the whole thing is staying with Blood yeah, that is not a small

No, it's not a drop of the thing soaked in blood. Oh my god I've got to do one more have to because you'll understand why Nicholas one star found evidence of bed bugs and a towel with Dry blood on it management denied responsibility and told me no refunds another guest had a similar issue And they threatened her with a baseball bat Their defense it might have been a small child threatening her with a baseball bat We don't know and he's already had his ass kicked. That's why he has the bat Yeah, and it threatened her with a baseball bat and brought a large Yeah on a large dog out to chase her away

What the fuck is that What a large dog out to chase her away. What the fuck is that? That is unbelievable. Someone running away screaming. Oh my God. Incredible. There's another one that's just, I will not gonna read the whole thing, but it's these poor people,

their granddaughters in the ICU at the children's hospital nearby. Oh Jesus, And they're just there. Oh my God. No. Um, the security guard though, told them at Walgreens that this was known as a quote, H O E T E L a hotel and that he lived in St. Louis and would sleep in his car before he'd go into that place. Dude, the hotel that I stayed in St. Louis and would sleep in his car before he'd go into that place. Dude, the hotel that I stayed in was, I don't know, eight floors up. And looking out, you could see the demarcation zone where they stopped taking care of anything out there.

Didn't give a fuck anymore. That's where this place is. They let it return to the earth. It's just bad. Yeah, just bad. There's another one here with a lady claiming she had, well the cable doesn't work, the only channel that comes up clear is the cheap porn channel that they have. Free, cheap porn, just playing all the time. Fuzzy news but free.

Clear pussy. Clear pussy. She said that she has 30 bed bug bites across their bodies That is wild Yeah, did you get off to the porn? That's the question. How was the porn honestly? Well if there's nothing else to watch you have something on the background you gotta have it on and after a while you're gonna Start getting into it. You can get into the story of anything even if there's no story, you know.

You make a backstory up. I like to sleep with the TV on, not with the noise. I turn it all the way down just to have like the flashing. Me too. I like that too. It makes me go to sleep just the whole time. Me too. Exact same thing.

I turn it down to one. That's the only thing that comes in. It's coming on. I'm watching it. That's what's gonna be on in the background. I'm going to be watching somebody get slammed. And you're going to be whacking it too at some point. I oftentimes pass out much easier if I beat off. There you go.

So that said, let's find something that you would buy and then take to this motel. The personal item of the week, everybody. This will be a short one because it's a really weird item and it's really disturbing and the reviews make me wince so I'm going to keep it short. It is a Cobb urethral sound silicone plug multi beads urethral for beginner 4 piece set. Do not tell me this is oh my god. These are giant. Screws.

Cork screws that you put down your dick hole. Oh my God. This is the scariest thing I've ever seen in my life. Who does this? We're both of us are shifting our chairs right now. Just like it's, it's, it's like a, it's like a drink mixer, swizzle straw. like it's like a it's like a drink mixer swiss straw and you put made of steel and you spin that into your your cock hole yeah it's got four stars to on prime somehow guys are sick who's

sick fuck I know you say hey no kink shaming I am shaming you if you want this this is sick seek therapy if this is what you want because you're inflicting pain on yourself. They're only $9.99 so that's nice for 4 of them. Made of flexible hypoallergenic and body safe silicone. Multi bead and beads size for beginner and experienced urethral sounds user for both. Four different sizes of your choice. They're gauged up to a thicker one here. Clean it before and after use.

I would fucking hope so. It's going in. Yes, clean it. Oh my God. Okay. Jeffrey Five Stars. What did he do? They keep calling it beads, but it's not beads.

It's a threaded pole. No, it's a threaded rod No right. It's a redded rod It's a rod simple and effective for cheap five stars Arrive discreetly and clean and sealed packaging a simple product. That's hard to get wrong. Yeah, it jabs down your dickhole That's all it does. There's nothing else you can do in when except maybe tighten a screw now and then Except maybe tighten a screw now and then. Jesus. Make a martini with it.

These are silky smooth with no manufacturing seams and insert comfortably full length. God damn it. The whole thing? The whole thing. This is a solid starter kit. Not really intended for stretchers or other advanced users. There's people stretching their dick, Hawaii! Wow!

Good size on the largest one, one quarter inch I think, meaning thick. And the beads feel all caps with a dash between letters, amazing! Oh dear Christ, I can't imagine. I will never use a smooth silicone sound again. I'm somewhat experienced with deep sounding. Oh god. Sound? We're calling it sound.

I can't do this. What are we doing? I can't get through these, dude. I keep picturing jamming something into my cock and it's making me just fucking, I can't do it. And why do they call it a bead? It's like, it's literally like twisted. It's not.

That's silicone? How is that silicone? Ah! I don't know, I don't know, I don't know I'm ordering it, I wanna see it AHHHHH Nine dollars is worth ordering and throwing it right in the fucking trash It's worth it just to see what the fuck is this? Oh my god

Jesus Christ, um, I can insert the largest one included completely and it's comfortable and not overly large Comfortable? That's not, that looks fucking huge UGHH Super flexible as well so you can do whatever you want while inserted. What, scream in agony? That's what I can do. Run down the street? Head to the emergency room? What are we talking about here? Using a fleshlight or Japanese on a hole. O-n-a-h-o-L-E on a hole vigorously with silicone sound inserted is out of this

world. Stop it right now. You put that in and then you fuck? Oh my god! And then you can't come because you're... It's all stopped up! It's all stopped up. Jesus Christ.

It's gonna explode like Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd's shotgun. Oh god. I also like to wear my electro stim cage to hold it in. What the fuck is happening? Why do you hate your dick so much? What did it do? East, what the fuck? East stim with a sound is awesome.

I don't like urethral electrodes. Does that exist outside of the CIA doing black ops in Turkmenistan to get information out of somebody? This is how you get the truth out of somebody. Electrical dick sticks that you jam into their, I'll tell you anything. Trying to get the number of the school bus they put the bomb on?

Why would you wanna do that? Yeah, wow. Fuck waterboarding, this is way worse. You don't even have to do it. You whip it out and you go, guess where this goes. Oh waterboarding. This is way worse. You don't even have to do it. You whip it out and you go, guess where this goes. Oh my god. I can't imagine. Guess where this goes.

I'll tell you everything. That's all you have to say. You don't even have to put it in. Just guess where it goes. I'll tell you what school district we put it on. Oh my god. So I find this to be a better option. 207 people found that helpful

There's 207 people looking for these. Oh, let's see how many they've sold. They've sell a lot of them. I think I mean It's got 652 ratings on I'm the most vanilla fucking person on the planet. No, no, you're not this is not normal I'm sorry. All right, good vanilla. No, it's not you don't want me to jam a fucking rod in your cock you vanilla son of a bitch no This is extreme crazy. It's not even jam. It's thread. It's Twisted you got a twist it chat twist it to simulate kindling He's fucking kidding me. Oh my god. Oh my goodness Next guy gives five stars. Yeah, holy shit. I've been looking for something like this for a long time My only complaint is that these are not thick enough for me. I like them thicker how fat can your cock take?

It's easy to clean and I can put it where it needs to be to get my enjoyment God Christ, man to clean and I can put it where it needs to be to get my enjoyment. Oh my god. Christ man. However, a bit of warning to new people to this, I tried the vibrations versions of these each with different companies and one feels, each one feels odd painful. Maybe it's because I'm not used to it, but when it comes to going deep with this product, I indeed hit the G spot. But I learned very recently when I use a vibrator

for anal pleasure, somehow I got the same effect when using Uplay vibrators and oh my God, you can feel it deeper in there. It just, it feels odd, but yet I want to try and let it continue one day soon. Think it might feel fantastic, but for now it feels damaging. So not taking this risk just yet till I do more research on the prostate. I want this guy's gonna whip open medical books. I'm so lucky sex is good for me like and I just like this because if this is I had to do all of this I don't even know. Welcome to Anatomy 201 I'm just here to find out about my prostate. How can I come harder? The level of abuse it can take.

Pros, fits well, it's really long and can hit the prostate. Oh, god! You're getting that far in. Ah, cons, want way more thicker versions. Say two inch would be nice for me at least. Two inch is thick. How do you stretch that heart? I? Well Amanda gives three stars interesting party trick is her thing here, okay?

Sure does wow the crowds. They'll be like no way. How do you do that? Why do you do that as what you see here actually? That's a that's a gal that I guess using this too. I mean you're Your heaters are your reether I guess Great for poking yourself inside the bladder or scratching a really hard to reach itch. I Don't know what the fuck you're talking about here one star not good That's I would say that I think yeah, these things are too flimsy for the purpose they're made for. I like a sturdier cock jammer. I needed a real thick strong swizzle stick.

It took real effort to try to get them in and once in they produced a surprising amount of friction. How are you surprised by that? It's rubbing against stuff, right? Making the experience more painful than pleasant. They also didn't want to come back out. No matter how much lubrication was used, they seemed to want to stick in place

once inserted to any length. I wouldn't dare try to use, I wouldn't dare try using the narrowest one of these for fear of it breaking off inside. Oh my God, nightmare. Another one, potentially unsafe one star. No shit. Yeah.

The end of the product that prevents you from losing it inside yourself is too small. It feels good and I like it, but there's a persistent fear of losing it when nearly fully inserted. You could fuck it deep inside you. Yeah. And then this person said, safety is really important. Really? Yeah.

I don't think it is to you. I don't think you care. So I have to give this one star. No choice in the matter. Uh, one star, not impressed. No, you're impaled. It's different. Jesus. Not what I expected. If you're into this type of thing, then go for it. But I was a beginner and it hurt way too much and even after using it it hurt like hell to pee You're all stretched out you got it Holy shit this next one blows my mind Sean one star. They have a sharp point

Oh, no get metal ones from a reputable company what metal ones even even worse I I am horrified and then finally we'll do one more because I'm just I can't do it anymore one star from Jean Abrasive material it was scratchy in places where you don't want to feel scratchy bad experience look elsewhere Deep inside your cock Wow, I'm gonna look elsewhere Holy shit someone else said like using a saw blade. It hurt for weeks. There you go, that's why we saved that for the end. Because, you can hear what the product was and turn that off if you don't want to hear the end of it.

Because that's fucking crazy. Thank you so much for listening, that's your stupid opinions this week. Make sure to rate and review. Listen to our other two shows, Crime and Sports and Small Town Murder Town Murder if you like what we do here they are exactly what they sound like. Keep coming back each and every week and we will see you next week everybody. Follow your stupid opinions on the Wondery app, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to every episode of Your Stupid Opinions ad free by joining Wondery Plus in

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