Your Stupid Opinions - Predicting A Murderer, Black Down There, Warfare At Leech Lake
Episode Date: August 12, 2024This week, we check out reviews about a TikTok famous psychic who can apparently tell if you're a murderer. A personal item that allows you to keep certain areas free of gray hairs, or logic.... A seemingly beautiful lake that may have you ducking for cover, while peeling leeches off your children. A popular grocery store that won't let you try on pants & much more!!Join comedians James Pietragallo and Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section!Subscribe and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!!!Don't forget to rate & review!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hello everybody and welcome back to Your Stupid Opinions.
Hey!
Hello there, we're so excited to hear people's bullshit today, we cannot explain it to you.
My name is James Petragallo, I'm here with my co-host.
I'm Jimmy Wissman.
Thank you for joining us today.
We are jacked, hope you've been enjoying all of the wild complaints, maybe getting some ideas of some things to do and some things not to do planning your vacation
Definitely follow us on social media follow all that stuff and listen to crime and sports and small-town murder to our other two
Podcasts which are exactly what they sound like so check those out listen to us do all that and once again
We have to say this before every show, these are not our opinions.
If we have an opinion, we'll let you know about it.
We're not shy, but this is other people's stuff
and we're just reading them.
Because I have gotten messages where people are very angry
at me for something someone else said.
And I'm like, I don't know what to tell you,
I just read it.
So we're just making fun of stuff.
It's just for fun because the reviews,
as we've always said, are more about the people making all sometimes than they are about the actual
thing so let's get right into this let us I you know what Jimmy I
Predict I'm gonna look into my crystal ball, and I predict a hilarious show
All right, and that's because I went to Boston's best psychic
No, I didn't go there, but that's the first review is that is that their name the name of it is Boston's Best Psychic. No, I didn't go there, but that's the first review. Is that their name?
The name of it is Boston's Best Psychic.
That's the name of the business.
And he's got 4.1 stars on Google, which is not.
Psychics are a weird thing.
Most of them are like 4.9 or 5 stars.
They should be 5.
You would imagine so, but this is one of the lower
psychic ratings I've seen with a lot of reviews too. So that's that's an interesting thing. Yeah
it's well he's apparently this guy got a little bit of TikTok famous in the last year. Oh and so
really juiced up his business quite a bit and I think he might be might be having trouble keeping
up with the volume as we'll talk about.
Oh man, TikTok seems to be, that would, fuck, yeah.
You should be able to drum up all kinds of business
as a psychic with TikTok.
And you can, the problem is, and a lot of the complaints
are the same exact complaint and we'll get into that,
but apparently you have to pay ahead of time
the day before your, yeah.
You have to put your payment in the day before.
Not just like when you get there,
you pay then you go sit down.
It's not like gas, it's like.
20 on pump six, I'll go out there and get it.
No, no, no, no, this is.
It's 20 on pump six tomorrow.
You show up at 9.30 to get it and I'll have it ready for you.
Then when you show up, they might not have a gas tank there.
That's the point. So this-
All we got is mid-grade.
Yeah, this place closes, open till 12.30 in the morning,
which is pretty wild.
You can get like a late night reading.
They say they have card readings, life coaching,
palm reading, tarot cards, and it's on,
it's Converse Avenue in Malden, Massachusetts it is.
I'll bet you, I'll bet you, bachelorette parties do shit like that.
Oh yeah, a lot of people just do it for fun, you know what I mean?
So that could be a fun thing.
Because I mean someone says something you don't expect, even if you don't believe in
psychics at all, if they go, oh your father's name was fucking Tom and your dad's name was
Tom, oh shit, my dad's name was Tom.
That's fun, you know, I don't know.
So Boston's best psychic here it is,
focusing on healing and guidance.
I use my gifts, and this, if you're gonna,
this is on your whole Google thing,
so you should probably spell check what you're doing.
Oh no.
It says I use my gifts if clairvoyance,
not of clairvoyance.
I use my gifts if clairvoyance, clairaudience, clairsentience, and clercognizance.
I think he made all those words up.
I've never heard clercognizance before.
I guess that means understanding the mystical world.
Clairsentience and clairaudience.
To help shed light on the blind spots that serve to act as blockages like your arteries. So here we go.
Stint in your audience.
Here we are. Let's open them up and get all the blood flowing here. This is the first
review, five stars. I had a psychic and a medium reading with Tarik. The guy's name
is Tarik by the way, and I am blown away.
Really?
Blown away.
He knew things no one else know or weren't Googleable.
So he didn't just look you up and see that, you know.
Yeah.
Because if you have a background check.
He knew my sperm count.
I can find out your parents' names, I can find out all that shit.
Oh, fuck yeah.
I have like three websites I use for our shows that I, so I can easily do that, that's easy.
It really opened my eyes to what I need to do
to get on the right track for myself.
Okay, this is sounding good.
Also, brought answers and closure
from my loved ones on the other side.
Now, closure, I guess they mean death.
If you're Italian, that means in Italy, by the way,
the other side, that's what that means that means in Italy by the way the other side
That's what that means if you say my relatives on the other side you go. Where are they Calabria? Where are your relatives at?
Oh, they're dead. Okay. I'm sorry
so that's automatically
if it's not closure in the form of
Where the safe is and the fucking?
The code to it. That's not close. That's not closure, where's my will?
That's closure, where'd you put it?
Where'd you put your deed to your gold claim?
Yeah, where is that?
Where the fuck'd you bury it?
The deed to the gold claim, where is it?
I am still in shock that they came through
and everything he said was legit.
I wish we all could have a friend
that is as gifted and funny as Tarek.
Oh, now he's funny too.
Oh, now he's funny too, all right Tarek, Oh now he's funny too. Oh now he's funny too.
All right Tarek, let's see what you got.
I know he went viral on TikTok and is overwhelmed with all the appointments so please be patient
with him.
What are you, his mom?
Is this his mom?
It is.
That's why he's charging day before because he's got a fucking line out the door.
It is worth the wait and he deserves that kindness and understanding. My life and those around me are changed
because of his gift he so graciously shared
for a fee.
Changed.
Obviously, yeah, shared like he was on the street corner
telling people shit for free.
All my best, Tarek, and a big heart emoji.
So next up, Madeline Five Stars.
Tarek was amazing.
He put me completely at ease.
I'm a newcomer to this
world and was somewhat of a skeptic and immediately picked up on things that he couldn't have
possibly known slash found online. He took his time with me, but managed to be both incredibly
compassionate and hilariously blunt.
Hilarious. He's so funny.
The guy is just hilarious. Let me tell you something. Hilariously blunt
when he calls you fat. Here's what it is and we'll find out. I'm going to give you an explanation
of exactly what they're talking about and you'll get it in a minute. Okay. He even offered
to do some follow-up work for free with a deceased relative who was too shy slash hesitant
to open up to him in the room. Oh, your deceased relative was too shy to
open up in the room, but he'll work with him and get back to you though. That's
nice. Get it to you on free time. Wow, imagine if you could say that to people, if you
could sit there and be like, yeah no I totally see your dead aunt. No, she's
right, she's just a little shy so she's not gonna, not gonna tell me the things
you want, but I totally see her though. Yeah.
I'll open her up later.
I'll get her later, don't worry about it.
We're one on one, I'm good.
I will definitely be going back and highly recommend him
to anyone who is searching.
Okay, so that's the good.
Now, here is the bad, this is Erica.
First I'll give you a, the majority of the one star reviews
are this exact complaint.
So this is gonna represent all of those
and then we'll go into more.
One Star, in October I scheduled a reading with Tarek.
I paid $60 for the reading.
This is ahead of time, like we said.
The day of the reading arrived
and I received an email reminder for the reading
that was taking place later that night.
I was counting down the minutes to receiving my phone call and it never came.
I sat by the phone.
Sat by the phone. I double checked that I gave the correct number. So this is she's
like a guy who's like she's the chick. She said she'd call. Is it that I give her to
the right? I text her the right number, okay. I want to make sure.
I checked the correct number at 17 minutes past my appointment time.
17, not 20, not 15.
It was correct, yet I still never received a call.
The only way to contact Tarek is by quote, message,
which is, to which I never got a response and still haven't.
I definitely expect a full refund,
but just beware when setting your appointment
and paying upfront.
Yeah, never pay for something ahead of time like that.
What incentive does he have to actually make the call?
There's so many people that said that,
where like, then I can't get ahold of him,
and I don't know, I'm hoping to get a refund.
All right, here is Dahlia One Star.
I paid $80 for a reading, 60 to 80, that was that the 80 the 60 was seven months ago. This is six months ago
So I think it went up $20 in a month it went up
Yeah, and he told me and he just told me my energy was quote bad
But that but not really how to fix it
He was not able to say anything insightful about my future or anything
I would expect from a psychic medium make some predictions
Asshole, I don't care what the fuck they are
Make like two a couple of like mundane things and then two just super bold predictions for like ten years in the future
Who fucking cares? Give me something. You're incredibly negative
Bad energy
You're incredibly negative
Bad energy You look at things the negative side of things always that's all well. He he used the bad
Energy to say you couldn't really see anything apparently
She said if my energy was so bad it prevented him from quote seeing then the reading should have been refused instead
He spent 45 minutes telling me how depressed I am and nothing was positive. He was just like, listen, honey,
I saw you in the ice cream aisle last night. You're incredibly depressed.
You had four things at Haagen-Dazs. I am upset. Those are like $7 each. That's a lot. You
ate $28 worth of ice cream last night. Do you understand what we're getting at?
That's a problem.
Bad energy.
Bad energy.
I feel like I got scammed.
Please don't make the same mistake.
He also rescheduled me on, rescheduled on me twice,
not very organized either.
This is fucking amazing.
This is one of the greatest reviews of all time.
Misty, one star.
Worst reading I've ever had. I like when we start with the worst whatever
you've ever had in your life.
He was not accurate about anything
and accused me of murder.
What?
Where the fuck did that come from?
Accused me of murder.
Not accused me of murder.
You murdered a person, didn't you?
He was not accurate about anything.
That's all she had to stop.
He missed on everything, so he's obviously not psychic.
And he accused me of murder.
You didn't have to throw that in.
He started taking out DNA samples.
I was like, listen, this is, I want a lawyer. He accused me of murder and then handed me the murder weapon and said,
now your fingerprints. See, that's what happens. See, she's a murderer. You killed my sister's
boyfriend. That's what happened. Way to go. You murder murder. The next line, somehow
is even crazier. If you would have, where is it? How could it possibly go any farther up the mountain?
Well, you can.
Quote, he told me I needed an exorcism.
Oh, so you're a possessed murderer
is what this person told you for $60 or $80.
Wow.
Where's $60 I ever spent?
That is crazy.
And told me my sister wasn't in a good place.
By the way way for 80 bucks
I expect the exorcism if I need one hook it up, bro. What are we doing here?
I'm still mind blown. I'm so upset. I wasted
$75 it really seems to be a he just looks at you and goes yeah 70
Yeah, yeah like Steve Martin in the jerk
Like a weight guesser. Yeah, yeah, like Steve Martin in The Jerk.
It's a profit deal.
Please don't make the same mistake I did.
I booked back in October and I didn't get the reading
until last night, hours past my scheduled time.
Hours passed.
And then imagine waiting hours and hours
to be told you're a murderer who is possessed by the devil.
You go, I came here to find out if my boyfriend's cheating.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Well, you better keep your head on a swivel because the FBI is coming for you.
I did call the authorities, trust me.
I have visions.
I've seen them.
Next up, Kendra, one star.
I'm so saddened by my experience.
I cannot believe how he spoke to me.
I stood there with my mouth open in disbelief.
And these are all exclamation point, by the way.
I never got the reading because I was so offended by his tone with me.
He does not know me or what I'm going through.
You would think he would have compassion unprofessional beyond.
Now there's a response from Tarik here though.
Yeah, Tarik has compassion.
Kendra, I have a very direct tone.
Anyone who has read with me knows and understands this.
Perhaps it's the current Mercury retrograde.
He's blaming the alignment of the planets now on his attitude.
You know I'm from Boston.
Come on bitch.
Oh my God, yeah.
Listen here, sweetheart.
I'm from Malden.
Yeah. Whatever your current condition's sensitivity, but you've mistaken my animated passionate
self for something other than...
That's it. That's the end of the sentence.
I understand you were late and likely anxious as I was to get started, which my tone's direct
sense of urgency reflected. He was like, all right bitch, you're late,
sit down and let's fucking go.
She was late or he was late?
I think he's saying she was late.
I've since apologized for any miscommunication
and will use this platform to do so once more.
I sincerely apologize that you were in any way hurt
and it was certainly not my intention
and I do hope you're finding resolution
in whatever you're currently going through.
Fucking murderer. You murdering fucking possessed devil bitch. Enjoy death row.
Yeah listen she devil let me tell you something.
Chelsea one star will do two more because the last one's long and funny.
Okay one star should be described as Boston's worst psychic. Oh, look at you. You're clever, aren't you? He's a funny one now.
Oh, he thinks he's funny.
He's a liar and does not look out for the best interest of his clients.
And certainly not me.
What does that mean?
He doesn't look out for him.
He's just telling you you're a murderer and walking away.
Don't believe him when he says that he will service you for free.
Oh, well, sounds like he's about to dick you down.
I'm here to service ya and he takes his pants off.
He's a liar and when you don't get an answer from him, like the many attempts to call him,
an easy come easy way out of a sticky situation.
That trick.
What the fuck are you talking about?
I don't know what you're talking about.
That's, you have to be clear.
You can't think that everyone that is reading this
was there with you and knows the background here.
This is, you're like jumping in telling us
a family problem when we haven't met your brother Billy
and we don't know what he's about.
I don't know what he's done.
Here's Wesley with One Star and this is amazing.
Okay.
Wesley. OMG, worst experience ever. Here's Wesley with one star and this is amazing. Okay.
OMG, worst experience ever.
Save your time and money and don't bother.
Here we go.
My husband scheduled a reading for me so that I could get in touch with my parents who recently
passed.
I was seeking any positive messages and guidance for future direction.
We walked into the enclosed porch in the front of his apartment.
That's where he does his readings by the way in an apartment and waited for him
to know we were there. It was decorated as you would imagine and I began to
feel some anticipatory anxiety. I asked my husband to stay with me because I
was a little nervous plus I thought he could take notes and help me remember
things later like it's a doctor's appointment like when your grandpa gets
cancer and you have to go to the thing and they go you know they tell you to and help me remember things later. Like it's a doctor's appointment. Like when your grandpa gets cancer
and you have to go to the thing and they go,
they tell you to write everything down
and ask the questions.
Follow up appointments, yeah.
Because he's not sure where he is right now.
Okay, so that's what she wants here.
The young man dressed like a college kid
with backward baseball cap,
well you don't know how he summons the fucking
mystical worlds, maybe he needs it.
It's also Boston. It's also Boston.
It's also Boston, yeah.
Comes out of the house and says, hi.
We weren't even sure if he was the one doing the reading and had to ask him, are you Tarik?
He said yes, and we made introductions and shook hands.
He said in a bitchy tone.
Bitchy.
Bitchy.
You'll see this is, it's fucking hilarious, okay.
First thing is he has to get lost.
Meeting the husband.
Oh, the boyfriend?
The husband, yeah.
Meeting my husband had to leave.
Not even in the waiting room, but stand outside in the dark in a strange neighborhood.
And not a nice one either.
Come to my shit neighborhood where I'll do readings for you and your husband has to...
That guy's gotta get lost.
That is wild.
I asked if he could stay because I was nervous.
The fast talking kid snapped back, well you're always nervous anyway aren't you?
We fucking know each other.
No?
What the fuck?
I'm not but this was a new experience that I wanted to share with my husband.
He said he was queer, meaning the psychic, not the husband here.
So I didn't have anything to worry about.
I'm not gonna rape you in there.
He said, listen, I'm gay, sweetheart.
You're not what I'm after.
That's what he said.
He took it as like, I'm nervous in that you're gonna.
Now are you understanding the blunt tone?
He's a fucking, a psychic gay guy. That's like listen, sweetheart
You got a bubble bubble and the people are like, I don't like his bitchy tone. That's just how he is
But that's the you know what I'm saying. That's what I meant. Like I think that's what they're getting Boston Queen
Yep, that's exactly what it is. So he said he was queer
So I didn't have anything to worry about the fact that the guy was gay didn't matter because I wasn't afraid he was gonna
Rate me right?
I wasn't worried that you were gonna do break me with my husband on your porch
That's probably not gonna happen. I just wanted to share my experience with my husband like on the Long Island medium
I just wanted to be like the TV show. I've seen yeah
Anyway, I wanted to have the experience, so I went along with it reluctantly
and left my husband,
my husband left and stood outside.
Tarek said he needed to focus on one energy at a time
and we get distracted by my husband's energy.
You know how swirling energy's in a room.
Butt heads all the time.
Okay.
A skeptical husband staring at their side eyeing me.
It's not working.
What's this costing us now?
This is fucking stupid. That's more than's not work. What's this cost on us now?
That's more than it's more than a socks game. What are we doing here?
We can get good socks tickets for that kind of money. What's happening ridiculous? I got a sad at Ohula hands and got blasted watching the socks
I went to Cape Cod this weekend, and we could have a nice weekend and instead of I'm sitting here with this
Queer boy over here. What's this?
What's this bitchy queen?
Yeah.
So that's what she says now, it goes on,
and she says, okay, maybe,
meaning maybe the husband's energy would screw him up.
Looking back, I think he wanted to have me alone
to attempt to manipulate me better.
I believe this man is a fraud
and preys on people's natural insecurities
to convince them he has some special knowledge worth paying for. You've just summed up the psychic industry right
there. They're good at intuiting things the same way salespeople are or yeah.
Absolutely. It's definitely a talent. They create a need and they sell you the
fucking solution for the need. And then every once in a while in the world
there's somebody who's claims to be a psychic
that said something that's fucking incredible
and you're like, how the fuck do they know that?
How did they know that?
And it makes you believe in all of the hundred losers
that come after that, and that's the sad part.
So I believe this man is a fraud, there it was.
He spent the first hour, or first half hour of the session
trying to size me up and pretty much insulting me.
He was wrong about everything,
and when I pushed back he would say that's not what I meant.
I mean that you got it wrong. You know my red hair? No.
It's not what I meant. Will you let me finish? I meant when she was a tiny little girl.
In her teen years she dyed her black hair red. It happened. I worked hard to understand
what he was trying to say and stay open.
He accused me of wasting my life being a quote good girl and pandering, doing what others
wanted me to do and that I was a quote bullshit artist.
At least he didn't call you a murderer who was possessed by Satan.
Look at this pot-kettle situation.
Right?
You're a bullshit artist.
Really? Am I? You don't say.
From one to another, he goes, listen, don't shit a shitter pal. Let me,
you know what I mean? Yeah. He said, I spoke intelligently, but had nothing to say.
He said I had no focus and I was half ass looking for a job.
You're a lazy lying, pandering bitch.
Did I mention that?
You're bullshit.
Tarek, the gay friend you didn't think you wanted.
You didn't think you needed.
You didn't think you needed, but apparently you did.
So I took it all in, but was not connecting with any of it.
He didn't seem to know me at all.
He said I was in sales, and actually I'm a therapist.
Okay?
Not even close, but I mean you sell something.
That's not what I meant.
That's not what I meant.
Who was he reading?
He said nothing of my recent loss.
I finally asked him if he could tell me something helpful
and more specific, i.e. prove he's a psychic
worth the money I'm paying.
He abruptly ended the session saying,
I'm not comfortable reading you, we're done.
I'm going down to the beat down, I gotta go.
And basically kicked me out, walking to the door.
Yeah, I got that's a big festival this weekend.
I left in disbelief of what had just happened.
I'm a therapist to know about how vulnerable people
can be when they come to you for help.
It's appalling that he would treat a client that way.
Clearly, he became uncomfortable and defensive when called out on his inaccurate reading,
no better than if he had guessed about me, and reacted to get rid of me rather than to give me
one specific credible piece of information that could help me validate his skill. He did nothing
for me except reinforce my skepticism and distrust for his line of work. He should be ashamed of
himself for the way he treated me and my husband and all the other people he has potentially hurt
in this process. It will be a long time before I trust someone to read me again." Where's your next
of line? The chiropractor? Wow. Fucking A, yeah, to fix it all. And that's another one. Some people
love it and it works great for them. Same shit, so whatever it is. But that is funny.
So you're a murderer, you're a,
this guy sounds hilarious to me, I don't know.
Sounds like he's probably funny.
So, next up, now let's get out of the psychic thing
and let's go somewhere where we know what we're getting.
Because that's nebulous.
You're handing over money, you're getting,
let's go somewhere with items on a shelf
that we can pick up and take home
and cook them because it's a supermarket
We are going to a Meyer store, which is spelled M E I J E R
That's Meyer and it's I guess a Midwestern Michigan. This is Ohio. This one is in
Maui, Ohio
MAU MEE, Ohio
Holy shit, that sounds fucking I I've never heard of it before.
Who knows where the hell it is?
Is it, no, Kroger is an actual store there.
I bet it competes with Kroger, right?
Probably, it seems like a local.
Well, I think it's a local, it's not a chain,
because it says that Meyer is your family-owned
one-stop shop in Maumee, Ohio,
that's been offering our neighbors great food,
great brands, and great value since 1934.
There you go.
It must be a franchise.
It's gotta be a franchise,
because they're around.
Yeah, they're in Michigan all over the fucking place.
So here's Sue with five stars.
I had been, it's been years since I went into
one of these stores, very impressed.
Wide aisles, easy to find what you're looking for,
and clean, great prices also. All right, that's good.
And here's Selena, she lets find out what happens
if you go late at night.
Five stars, went at night.
Very well lit, clean parking lot.
That's good, you're not gonna get mugged in the parking lot.
Cleanliness throughout the store and surrounding areas.
Prices were decent for the quality and selection.
Cashiers, friendly and courteous.
So there we go.
I almost said serviceable,
because I was reading something else.
That's not right.
I thought you were gonna say surly.
Friendly and surly, very strange stuff here.
Same, at the same time.
Here's two stars from Luke,
long lines for self-checkout,
and Pitbull dragging a leash down the aisle.
What?
I don't think it's the store Pitbull.
I don't think that's corporate policy.
And then one.
This is on patrol.
We need at all times four cashiers,
a deli guy, a photo shop,
and then we also, where's the store Pitbull?
Put a leash on it, let it dangle,
and let it wander because that.
We could drag a chain around this store.
We need people to know they gotta have
their head on a swivel. I don't understand that. Not impressed by the experience. A wandering
pit bull is a like, yeah, that's a trope of a bad neighborhood, not a grocery store. They
got to get rid of the self check too. It sucks so much. It just doesn't. But it's nice if
you have like two, if everybody used it for like three things, we'd all be flowing. But
someone's like, I have a whole cart and don't want to talk to anybody
So I'm gonna stand here for 45 fucking minutes. Yeah, motherfucker. Stand here trying to find the produce code for Arugula
And it's not gonna work. No, just get shit with barcode through there. That's it. So Matthew gives one star
I will never go here again
Wanted to buy pants. Oh
And they have it's like it's they have all that shit. Yeah, they have all sorts of stuff here
No dressing rooms to try stuff on
No, because there's no dressing rooms in places that also sells apples. Yeah. No, that's the thing
If you can buy cocoa puffs in the same place you buy your pants
You just look and hold them up to you and if they look about right you buy them.
You're not a person that's looking for an exact tailored fit I have a feeling if you're
buying your pants at the grocery store.
Go to the end of the aisle, buy yourself a belt.
You're looking to cover your asshole up is all you're looking to do it sounds like.
Make sure people can't see your dick.
They sell rice-a-roni.
Don't expect to have a fitting room for your off-brand Levi's.
And then this guy goes on to say, was going to take to the bathroom to try on.
That's not how this works.
What?
No.
Oh, don't do that.
The woman said I had to buy them first, then take them to the bathroom to see if they fit.
Yeah, that's how that works.
They don't have you go to the service counter to return. If they don't fit, then't have you go to the service counter to,
if they don't fit, then you have to go
to the service counter to return them.
So you have to buy them and try them on.
What a fucking asshole.
At that point, you might as well take them out
to your car and try them on.
You bought them, wear them out, then take them back.
Tell me why I would do that.
Instead, go to a different store that has dressing rooms.
Well yeah, Walmarts, Target, et cetera.
You guys lose my
business and will tell everyone I know not to shop there. You don't get my money.
Okay, corporate ass Meyers.
I bet they're a big high spender too, the guy who buys pants at the grocery store. Probably
I'm sure was gonna, he was really gonna go in there and drop so much cash.
He's gonna clean them out of their fucking pants
He wasn't going in there for bar s hot dogs or anything was he?
Big bird gives one star. Hey, that's nice to see big birds alive and well
Now Maui, Ohio location racially profiled me again. Oh, really? Yes again
No, no eight foot tall birds in here. Weird.
I am American born and raised.
I am of Latin descent.
Today I was followed around by different prevention.
I guess lost prevention?
Different prevention.
Don't be different.
I go to self checkout, scan first item it recognized and I bag it, scan second item it recognized,
I bag it.
Alert, please wait for cashier with the checkout screen
video monitoring me with video of me on a screen
as if I were stealing, but why two items are scanned,
two items are bagged, okay.
Yeah, it says sometimes, oh, get cashier, you know.
Hold a second, it didn't recognize that product,
we wanna make sure you're not stealing, that's all.
Yeah, cashier walks over to fix the no issue problem.
I asked the cashier by the name of Maya what happened.
She mumbled, I said, excuse me.
She replied, I don't know.
It does that sometimes.
Yeah, she doesn't care.
She didn't program these machines.
They told her these are the buttons you press when it does that.
And that's what she knows.
There's no idea why or the root problem.
Surprise surprise.
This thing fucks up from time to time.
That's fucking, yeah, it's a fucking grocery machine.
I asked for the store supervisor and the store supervisor, Joyce, understood my concerns
to which her words were, you feel violated?
And I replied, yes.
She said that the person who handles these issues is not present at the time.
I asked for a corporate phone number, call disconnected second call patch me over to wrong department third call patch me over
It's a fuck. They pressed the button and then you continued scanning and left
Did you pay for the items that you wanted then shut the fuck up?
Do you know how many times that's happened? You know many times that's happened four times while I'm doing one transaction?
That's the problem with these.
I'm not trained to fix whatever fucking just happened.
The guy behind the register probably has this happen
30 times a day, but he knows how to fix it
because he fucking works here.
He fucking works here, exactly.
Jesus.
I hate self-checkout more than anything.
It's so fucking hard and ridiculous.
It's so frustrating, yeah.
Sabrina one star. If I could give zero. I would. I would. I hate self-checkout more than anything. It's so fucking hard and ridiculous. It's so frustrating, yeah.
Sabrina one star, if I could give zero.
I would.
I would, that's right.
You know I would, god damn it.
I went here, that's good, at least you're reviewing somewhere you went.
I went here, like I do every couple days, and had a horrible experience with Lynn the
Cashier.
Like I do every couple days.
Like I do every couple, me and Like I do every couple of things.
Me and her, we're like the, like Peter Griffin and the chicken.
We just fucking, we see each other, we start brawling.
We just square up.
Yup.
I purchased-
Alright Lynn, here we go.
I purchased groceries and wine.
At checkout, Lynn asked for my ID.
I produced it.
Lynn wasn't satisfied.
Oh!
Wow.
Looks a little fishy to me. She went on to say, let me match your ID with your card.
I responded, I'm using debit. She replied, I still need to match your ID with your debit
card. Mind you, my purchase was barely a hundred dollars. As I stated, I come here very frequently
and have never been asked to do such. Lynn was subliminally implying. Now we're going to intuit what the cashier is
thinking at the Meyer store.
She was an ulterior motive.
Wow. So people have been accused of murder, told they have to have exorcisms and have
been subliminally fucking dealt with, implying that I was lying about something. Lynn is
rude, racist and does not belong in customer service.
This was the most humiliating experience of my life.
I gave her my debit card.
If that's the most humiliating experience of your life,
you have-
You better hang on.
Wow, I could tell you, I have 10 more,
before the age of 10, I have 15 more stories
that are way more humiliating,
and most of them are just my stupidity.
I could tell you lots.
Congratulations on never shitting your pants.
Yeah, good for you. I gave her my debit card to compare but there's absolutely no reason
for this kind of behavior. Avoid this place or at least steer clear of Lynn. The manager
on duty even admitted that was not their policy and Lynn made that up on her own. Lynn sounds
like a twat I think here. Something needs to be done about her. Now here's a picture
of Lynn by the way,
in case you were wondering.
Oh, Lynn looks like an asshole.
She's yelling.
She's in the middle of yelling.
Take my picture, I don't care.
I don't give a shit what you do,
because I don't care.
You don't look like you even have a debit card.
Thomas, can you?
So, it was Lynn trying to say that she just wanted
to match up to make sure that she's the authorized user
of that card?
I guess so.
They've done that to me a million times.
Yes.
I'm going to be honest.
I fucking hate it.
It's annoying.
It feels like it's accusing me of stealing this credit card.
It's mine, motherfucker.
Don't worry.
This isn't the store policy here.
Right.
So Lynn should not be doing it.
If I'm a cashier and my store policy is if they fucking scan a card that's on them, I
don't give a fuck if it's her card,
her dad's card, or some guy she fucking mugged outside.
Not my problem.
I don't dispute it.
I don't give a shit.
Don't care.
You know what I care about?
Beep, beep, beep.
121 for 46.
I don't give a shit.
This is my job.
There's another person waiting to do the same thing
right behind her.
That's it.
Let's move it along here.
Thomas, one star, very rude checkout woman.
I think we're dealing with Lynne again, possibly.
Sale items are mixed in with non-sale items.
Okay.
I told the clerk about it and she took it very personally.
Oh, she's talking.
Personally.
Wow.
I just wanted her to let management know that there's a problem with the way they mix
sale and non-sale items.
She said management doesn't care and I believe her.
I left with all my groceries still at checkout.
I don't know exactly what that person's problem is.
I'm still trying to figure it out
and I don't know what the fuck they're talking about.
Like they put Velveeta boxes in with the store brand boxes
in a bin that says two for five
dollars or some shit?
I guess it's mixed in, I suppose.
But Velveeta rings up regular price, I don't know, I think that's what they're saying.
I think that's probably it, yeah.
Renee one star, I love Meyer, however, I just checked out on lane 10 with Brittany, so now
we got Lynn and Brittany to add to the list here, whose behavior bordered on being rude.
At least it wasn't rude, it bordered on being rude. She said nothing as she began,
looking bored the entire time, and handed me the bill. Handed me the bill?
The fuck it's handed a bill at the grocery store. You don't get handed anything, it pops up,
you look at the number and you pay. After you pay. Saying a brief thanks. She overfilled the plastic bags.
In general, she failed to exhibit the cordial competency I usually experience at Meyer.
An attitude adjustment might help this employee live up to the Meyer brand.
Oh.
Jesus Christ.
There's a fucking bar set for Meyer?
Apparently, there's a bar that's very high.
Very high. Here is, and this is
a, we're gonna lead one into the other, and this is a very intentional segue.
Alyssa gives one star. I bought brownie bites and a few other pastries. The
brownies smelled like fish. What? So bad that my son threw up it was disgusting.
Well I've never heard of a fish, a brownie smell like anything with chocolate, but okay were these store brownies what I don't know
Brownie like in little ones the brownie bites usually come in like it's a store thing in the yeah clear plastic thing
And you know a bunch of brownies bites. Yeah, I think it's from like the bakery section usually
So and a few other apparently got mixed in with the fish oil and bad things happened. Now from brownies to brownies here, Liam, one star, stopped to charge, I guess
his phone, his car, something. The entrance was closed by the charger so it was a long
walk. Upon entering the bathrooms were located at the closed entrance. So they had to walk
all the way back there. We just wanted a drink, so we attempted to use
the restroom in the produce section for a drink.
What?
From like the faucet or the toilet?
Flush the toilet and lap it up.
Are these golden retrievers here coming in?
What are we doing?
The women's was closed, but I attempted the men's.
When I turned around to exit,
I was greeted with the
following image and I will show you this image because it's right there. Oh! There's a large
turd on the floor of the bathroom. There's a lot of brownie bites. That's exactly why the brownie
bites is before that. That is a that's where they get the brownie bites. Now that is by the way not
in a stall. It's not next to a toilet
That's right by the door. That's just in the general main like living room area of the bathroom. Someone just said I'll just shit here fuck it
So yeah, there's that I there will be poop everybody absolutely
I told the employee and they said they already knew
Absolutely. I told the employee and they said they already knew.
Yeah, we know, but we usually wait for like two, three of them to accumulate and then
we go into a sweep.
One at a time.
We're not in there three times a day.
One at a time.
I got other shit to do.
Like there's so much, I can't keep going in there and cleaning shit up.
It's going to be constant.
Following a dog around?
This is nuts.
I'll wait until he leaves a few.
Maybe that's the pit bull.
Maybe it's from the pit bull.
Looks like a human.
Yeah, he's not done with his shift yet.
We'll wait till he goes home.
At least he knows to go in the bathroom area.
That's pretty impressive.
Yeah, that's a good boy.
Oh man, and then they go, really?
And no one cleaned or closed the bathroom?
Never again!
Never again, obviously.
Look at that.
That is fucking hilarious here.
Oh my god.
This is great.
Okay.
Next up, Casey One Star.
Today was the last straw for me at the deli.
Last straw for me at the deli.
At the deli.
I am done with their deli.
What happened?
The lady, only one working, used the same pair of gloves waiting on the three people in front of me
and then me and then the next person
and who knows how many.
Well, if she's just getting cold cuts, that would be fine.
Who gives a shit?
That's fine.
When she helped me, she had to go back
to their big refrigerator and get a new ham.
All I could see was her touching
the gross refrigerator door to shut it.
Yeah, that's not good
No, literally all black smudges on it moving some cart. Yeah
Moving some cart out of the way then open a cardboard box with scissors then
Breaking down the box and touching all of that and then proceed to slice my ham
I'm done too and I've never been that she went in the bathroom and picked up that shit too with it.
She just used it like it was a plastic bag and threw it right in the garbage.
He needs to change those gloves.
Oh, I'm grossed out, man.
And all that shitty hand.
Why use the gloves at that point?
You're just touching everything.
Take them off.
You're not protecting us, you're protecting your hands.
Exactly. Even just for you, the night at the washroom constantly. take them off. You're not protecting us, you're protecting your hands.
Exactly, even just for you, the night at the washroom constantly.
I absolutely never complain about anything,
but this was it for me.
They're never friendly and other than one lady,
but I never complain about that.
Needless to say, my ham, turkey, and cheese
I had her slice was just left there
because I was not feeding that to my family.
Right.
Yeah, how hard is it to change your gloves after waiting on each customer or when you do something
other than slice the food?
Yeah, if you're going from meat to meat, what do you want now?
Half pound of turkey, there you go.
What do you want?
Half pound of Swiss, there you go.
That's fine.
Once you venture away from that area, start touching other shit, new gloves.
That's a problem.
Yeah.
New fucking gloves, I would say.
Here we go.
Zach, one star, gone to Meyer five times in the past three weeks.
And there's been a total of two gallons of chocolate milk stocked.
Oh, yeah.
Looks like it's time.
Look behind the shelves in the back.
And there was an entire pallet of gallons of chocolate milk.
Well, was there none?
Did you want more than two?
Did you get a gallon?
I bet that when it's empty,
they'll probably put more in there.
I think they probably want to sell the milk.
I'm going to go out on a limb.
They probably don't want it to just rot on the palate
and they're fucking cool.
I like to get, I like to make Italian sauces at home
and I will get the sweet Italian sausage
from the, from the grocery store.
They are always, the case is always, without fail, empty. And I walk
to the butcher and I go, do you happen to have? And they go, sure. And he goes, oh yeah,
I do. I have a bunch back here. And I was like, it's empty out here. He gives me one
and then he fills that shit up. Look at that. Maybe, by chance. Use your words. Say something.
Use your words. Like a big boy. See something, say something. Let's go, Zach. Be a big boy
and use your words. Grow up, Zach.
And then finally, Denise.
I bought a turkey from there.
Turned out it was spoiled.
Tried to return it for another one,
and then this, the rest is all caps, okay?
What a joke.
They said no due to no receipt.
Well, yeah, okay.
Yeah, we don't know that you bought that.
Well, it was still
in its original packaging with Myers on it, but they don't know what date you bought it
on. Right. And also I have this thing that's like, that's your dildo. Once you leave the
store with meat. Yeah, that's yours. You can't bring it. They don't know if you left it,
even if it's an hour later, they don't know if you left it in your trunk for an hour while
you went and played frisbee in a park and then came back with spoiled meat. That's your dildo once you walk out that door. Meat's
a chance. You're taking a fucking chance with meat. It's just the way it is.
And especially turkeys because when those go bad, they smell like eggs. I froze one
for three months, two months, whatever. It was a long time. It was in the freezer. I
thawed it out, left it in the fridge maybe a day too long.
When I opened it, smelled like shit, I threw it away. That's on me. I did that.
I fucked that all up. I fucked it all up.
I probably should buy a turkey around two days before I'm going to make that fucking
turkey.
That's it. Probably shouldn't keep it and store it for long periods of time.
I'm not a turkey storage guy. I just learned that. No, not a turkey storage guy.
I'm a use my turkey, buy my turkey, use my turkey guy.
Buy a turkey, cook a turkey.
That's it.
That's it.
I'm a turkey worker.
That's how this works.
So thanks for nothing, won't be back.
All right.
That said, I think it's time everybody, since we've seen some, we've had a psychic reading,
which is very personal, and we've seen poop.
That's as personal as it gets.
Yeah, a turkey's bad.
So it's time for our personal turkey.
I'm going to go ahead and get a turkey.
I'm going to go ahead and get a turkey.
I'm going to go ahead and get a turkey.
I'm going to go ahead and get a turkey. I'm going to go ahead and get a turkey. I'm going to go ahead and get a turkey. I'm going to go ahead and get a turkey. I'm going to go ahead and get a turkey. everybody since we've seen some we've had a psychic reading which is very personal and we've seen poop that's as personal as it gets so it's time for
our personal item of the week everybody and this is an item where let's say
let's say you want to make a good impression on people yeah I mean you
want to look your sharpest your your youngest your most first ones of a
lasting one of them hurt your most vibrant
Yeah, what it is your most vibrant impression, but you want to do it with your pubes, okay?
You're gonna your pubes are gonna be leading the way front and center for you here people never forget that we have for you black
Betty the color for the hair down there kit
Black bed. This is black pubed I okay okay comes in black just black just black it's just a black they might
have other colors but it's called black Betty so I think it's for black and it
says get back to black or rev up the action gray oh there's a gray one too if
you want your people
If you want everyone to think they're fucking their grandmother, that's perfect
No way black Betty. Oh rev up the action gray. No way black Betty rules below the belt
No black Betty
time up hughes
time up hughes Black Betty color for the hair down there naturally colors covers
gray and enhances to match your glorious locks above follow the easy directions for safe
color natural looking no mess no drip use it every time you're you color black is beautiful
get your Betty ready get your Betty ready okay just for giners it's not it's yeah no it shows here's look I'll show you the picture yeah this is it's just. Okay, just for giners. It's not it's yeah. No it shows here's look. I'll show you the picture
It's just a there is just for the it's just for the bush or the color hair down there nothing else
that's what it is does not contain ammonia or parabens and
Betty products and blonde girls. What's up? Actually you can only make it black. It's this is for black pubes, man
That's all there is.
Blondes don't really go as gray anyway,
so I think that's probably why.
And redheads don't really go that gray either.
Redheads are way less gray.
Oh, it's just to get the gray out, huh?
That's all it's for?
To make your pussy black, I don't know.
It's a black pussy hair.
It's your fucking jet black pussy hair.
Which you know when you see a guy who's like 55 years old and he's got jet black hair and
it's like that dye color.
I don't want to pull down pants and see that.
Jesus, what's going on here?
How did you do this?
That's a lot.
It does have natural ingredients like elderflower, cherry bark, chamomile, comfrey, rosemary,
and aloe.
That's a lot of plants you're rubbing in there. Camomile, Comfrey, Rosemary, and Aloe.
That's a lot of plants you're rubbing in there.
Let's get our Bettys ready with some fucking plant products here.
Gia, five stars.
Title of the review is Works.
That's good.
So I purchased the brown color because black had a longer wait period to ship.
Yeah, apparently there's a brown also.
I guess that would be Brown Betty, is sounds like a dessert or a shit. One of
the two. That's not good here. The Brown did the job. I was skeptical about it
working. It's dye. Why would you be skeptical? Why would it not work? Yeah. No.
You can dye anything. No, the carpet does not match the drapes, but so what it covered what needed to be covered
I like that you can save half for whenever you'll need it again
Okay
Next up the title of the reviewer here is senior fun is the name which is a good one
five stars
Provides a much younger look is their title
Yeah, that's what it's there for.
And then their whole review is used
for its original intention.
I'm gonna try to dye my cap.
Dye my pussy black.
That's it.
Not my fucking mustache hair.
Dave, five stars, it works for guys but one caution.
Betty works for boys, too
I'd be using a brown beard color
But the results were not enough to overcome the fading old guy look of my once dark pubic hair
Wow, my once dark pubic hair. He gives a shit about wow
So I figured I'd try black Betty to bring back the natural look and highlight of my pubic triangle. Okay, dude
Oh, he's got a trunk. I don't know what it's like for girls with their pubes or whatever before a guy
I'm gonna go don't enough shave your fucking dick hair off fucking cut it down low or this
It's gonna be great sometimes just leave it who cares fuck is wrong with you
If your dick is good enough, no one's gonna care about your pubic triangle.
I'll tell you that right now.
If you got a strappin' dung,
no chick's gonna be, oh man, his dick was amazing,
but he had like a gray in his pubes, I don't know.
No!
There's a British dating show that shows the bodies naked,
before you even talk to the person.
Yeah, yeah, we talked a lot about that.
And they've showed the dicks,
there's a lot of guys with like,
straight up all gray dogs.
Really?
All gray, and the girls are fucking jacked about it.
They want gray pubes.
I guess.
I guess that means the guy's older
and that's what they're looking for.
Yeah, yeah, at least these British gals
are impressed by it, I don't know.
You can do whatever you want with your hair
and all that shit, but your pubes don't lie,
that's the thing.
Your pubes don't lie. That's the thing. Your pubes don't lie. Betty did the job almost too good.
Wow.
It's been years since my pubic hair has been that dark.
Wow.
Good for you, Bod.
Okay.
I almost wished I'd have gone with brown instead of black.
Application is simple, no irritation.
I was careful not to get any on my inner thighs to avoid staining the skin, as the instructions explained.
But some of the dye made its way onto the shaft of my penis.
Oh no.
Dot, dot, dot.
Anyway, this is a very good product.
Anyway, now I got a blotty dick.
Anyway, you know, I got that.
That's a weird thing.
Hey, look at this guy with his nice black pubes.
What is all over your dick?
This is weird. Why does it look like you have a weird thing. Hey, look at this guy with his nice black pubes. What is all over your dick? This is weird.
Why does it look like you have a weird foundation
on your dick?
Five stars again, use down there
and also on my eyebrows to match.
You gotta match your eyebrows to your pubes
is how it works there.
Not your head hair, your eyebrows to your pubes.
That's the first.
So I mean, first impressions are big
and that's what I'm saying.
You meet someone while your genitalia is exposed, they're going to go, hey, I don't see that.
That's not real.
That's not natural.
Oh look, it's natural.
Your eyebrows.
Oh my God.
Eyebrows.
Ridiculous.
I'm a senior and down there and eyebrows, well lol they have some telltale greys.
I used down there and decided to try on my eyebrows too.
OMG worked so good, even better than what I had been paying my hairdresser for.
Five stars again.
Wow.
Yeah.
I like this one here. The four stars. Glad to see I'm not the only guy
using it lol. It works for chest hair and beards. I cannot attest to any other areas.
Holy shit. Chest hair and beards. Dude. Really? Are we that vain guys? Right. Are we are we are we that vein guys right? Are we that afraid of our fucking hair?
Come on. Holy shit. You could also just wear a shirt and your beard and your bush and your bush get all of it
I can't I can't get it. I can't get beyond it man wild man
I've never had to wear gloves to apply a dye, but if you don't use them with this you will have a mess
Yeah, I also use a brush from
another kit to apply. I may use the little round brush and some extra white wire spots
but the brush isn't practical for chest area. Gee, maybe that's because it's not fucking
made for that, it's made for a pussy you idiot. Not only is it not made for a chest area,
it's not made for what you have anywhere. This is pussy die,
you fucking idiot. It's a very small area that it's for. Oh shit. Rich, another four
star works, he says. Wifey likes to mix it up down there. Oh boy. Hey, there you go.
From a Brazilian to a landing strip or clean shaven. She is happy with the results of her, she's just a, you know what,
you can't pin her down with her pubes,
she won't be pinned down.
Sometimes it's real baby smoke.
You know what I mean?
Sometimes she waxes it,
you never know what you're gonna get when it's down there.
It's a box of chocolates and that's what makes it exciting.
You know what I'm saying?
She is happy with the results of the hair color.
She said she would try other colors.
Why isn't she writing this review, by the way?
If we're just asking.
Where is she?
He's on his phone.
Hey baby, what'd you think of that?
It's good, would you try it again?
Okay, she would try.
She says she'd try.
With other colors.
In the other room.
I see it.
The downside is the bottle of activator's
kind of a pain to use.
When trying to use just a little bit,
maybe they will change the design of the packaging
and put both of them in a small toothpaste type tube.
Hence, four stars.
Oh, J.B. Weld.
Yeah.
Here's three stars from Nicole.
It works.
That's good. Okay, good.
Before I used this product,
I applied petroleum jelly around my delicate areas.
Whoa. Why?
Literally girding her loins for battle here.
She's fucking protective. She's putting Vaseline on her thighs? A protective Vaseline shield
in case the dye gets on it. That's interesting. However, I should have applied it to the skin
of the private part that was being colored because after I rinsed the color out and shampooed
and treated the area, it's still itched. Oh, that's good, she's walking around scratching her pussy for the next week.
I've been applying petroleum jelly and oil to the area.
What kind of oil?
What kind of oil, a 10W30?
What are we talking about here?
We're like, I don't know what we mean.
Avocado, what are you doing?
I don't know.
With the purpose of getting rid of the itch and irritation.
So the product works to remove gray,
but it also causes horrible itching.
Itching, yeah. That's not great.
Three stars, works fine, but rubs off onto the sheets.
Oh no.
Washes out, but sort of a downer
if you're trying to be inconspicuous.
Yeah, if you wake up with someone and you roll over
and there's just a black triangle
where you're laying on your face
And they're like whoa
What's going on there? Well? They died brown. There's not just a brown smear in the brown. Did you shit?
If they're smelling it, it doesn't smell like shit
Smells like chemicals die. Maybe I don't know what's going on here
Three or two stars easily stains be Be very careful when you apply.
It will stain everything it touches.
Use a lot of Vaseline on the areas you don't want tinted.
Apparently that's the stencil here.
Who the fuck doesn't know that dye dyes things?
Dyes shit.
I didn't know that Vaseline was like the stencil though
that you could just guard everything.
That was the solution.
I didn't know either take
your time it took me four days to remove the color from my inner thigh tried
everything color is very dark but it does work that's good to know two stars
Brown is not dark enough turns out it's Auburn there's a lot they've got a whole
color wheel wow well you should have probably got black then if brown's not dark enough for you.
I bet it said Auburn on the box.
After two attempts, Betty Brown did not do much for my gray chest hair.
First time I left it on 20 minutes, second attempt left it on for 40 minutes.
Both times color ended up being Auburn, not very brown at all.
Pubic area color lasted nine days or so is that good?
I don't know if that's good. I think so
I'm not sure Marie one star a few drops of this brown dye totally ruined my new sinks
Oh, no, that's not good. I've tried using nail polish remover and just a heads up
You can't get this on anything. Since it's used in a bathroom,
they should think about that and have shared the liability
of ruining my laminate sinks.
What do you want, fucking indemnity from these people?
The countertops.
You got dye on a plastic porous surface,
and you're dumb.
You should have went, oh fuck, I put Vaseline on it,
obviously to block it from the dye guy You are losing your safety deposit
They want them to share the liability cuz you're an idiot no
I've never had hair dye do this
I also wish they made it so you didn't have to wait so long for it to process and it stains your skin also
Sure, I'm fucking die. It's fucking die
Here is one star. You still need a bikini wax.
Well, that doesn't claim to take hair off of the sides of your vagina. Does it?
Does it think it's nair too? Yeah. Oh wow, this is a great product. It does everything.
It knows which hairs to pull out by the roots. Awesome.
Yeah, can you imagine you put Just For Men in your hair and it also gives you a very even haircut?
Also gives you a nice fucking trim up.
That's perfect.
Trims around the ears and neck.
Very nice.
Awesome.
That's excellent.
This product is only safe to use on the hair above the lips.
Yes, I said, the next line.
Yes, I said lips.
The look on your face was, did you just say lips? Yes, I said lips. line. Yes. I said lips the look on your face was did you just say lips?
Yes, I said no I get it. Yeah, just on the part of the patch above don't put it
Where would you put it below that? I don't know put it on your taint skin
I don't think that's gonna help which to me is basically pointless. I mean the whole I mean the soul-tuft
What the soul-tuft near the stomach is not even half the battle.
On a positive note, the seller was kind and seemed genuinely concerned about my satisfaction
with their product.
Apparently they're saying on the sides is...
How much hair do you have?
I think this is a very hairy, lower section, I think is what we're going on.
That's a whole mouth.
And then finally, Savannah, one star, do not buy this.
I got a UTI two days after using this.
Savannah, goes on the outside, sweetheart.
That's the reason why.
Don't dye the inside.
Your cervix shouldn't be dyed black, that's the problem.
Okay, so we've done that.
We've dealt with our pubes are just fucking jet black gleaming like the day we were born.
Jet black gleaming pubes.
Now let's take our freshly dyed pubes somewhere nice to relax.
What do you say?
Because it's between the poop and the psychic was very frustrating.
We're going to the Bald Mountain State Recreation Area.
Where's that at?
It's in Michigan, Oakland County, Michigan.
So, again.
There's a lot of bald mountains in this country.
Lot of bald mountains.
Here we are in Michigan.
A picnic table's available, has a volleyball court.
It's a 4,637 acre area state park
located near Lake Orion, Michigan, off Michigan Route 24.
It consists of some of the most rugged terrain in southeastern Michigan.
The recreation area is composed of a north unit and a south unit, which are not contiguous.
So almost 5,000 acres.
Incredible Orion Township, Michigan.
This is in and the here we go.
All right.
Five stars and there's pictures trees lake pretty
Yeah, looks nice. Yeah, look. I'll show you check it out look at that
That's nature. Oh
colors some orange
Such a beautiful park the leaves are starting to change and wildlife is slowly disappearing due to the cold
But the hike was amazing sat around this body of water for hours
and swung in a hammock.
Idyllic.
Idyllic.
Such a refreshing feeling and view and experience.
That sounds fucking great.
That's awesome.
Misty gives five stars and shows her whole crew
like all selfies of tits here too.
Really? Yeah. Yeah, you're gonna not want, you're gonna be, her whole crew, like all selfies of tits here too.
Really?
Yeah.
So looks like that.
Yeah, you're not going to be, oh, change my mind.
Yeah, let's go back to not there.
That is a misty indeed.
That's a misty for Michigan right there.
Five stars.
I love this beach for family outings.
I have a hard time when it comes to the crowds of people in this beach.
For the most part, it's never overpopulated.
That's good. I absolutely in this beach. For the most part, it's never overpopulated. That's good.
I absolutely love this beach.
Again.
Yeah.
I give them five out of five stars.
If they had seven stars,
I would give them more.
And she said I'd give even more if there was more.
I highly recommend this for family outings.
Well, that's very nice.
That's good shit.
All right, Karen, two stars.
Shockingly, Karen's disappointed. She's got a. That's good shit. All right Karen two stars shockingly Karen's disappointed
For her parks, yeah
disappointed supposed to have been meteors and s'mores
Staff knew nothing about it. I had it printed info from online was looking forward to the event apparently
She found an event online that didn't exist that didn't
Or it wasn't organized by the park people were doing it and they put it up and I assume there's meteor event apparently she found an event online that didn't exist that didn't or
it wasn't organized by the park people were doing it and they put it up and I
assume there's meteor showers they're gonna make s'mores while it happens
it's not hard to so guess what you can do make a fucking fire and check out the
meteors you don't need a whole group to do that Scotty gives two stars easily
the weediest lake I've been to this year. What does that mean?
That is a mind-blowing review.
The weediest, most weeds in it if you're fishing, you keep getting caught in the weeds.
The weediest lake, which I've never heard anybody use as a...
Never.
And then I've been to this year.
Last year, way more weeds, but this year...
I've been to a couple.
It's very specific.
One star here, the water is extremely dirty and changing rooms for men, there's no doors.
So you have to watch out for people while changing.
Yeah, it's one of the, and a lot of complaints about the bathrooms being gross, outdated,
no doors on the shitters, things like that.
Yeah, but the water, like what do you expect them to do about that?
There's no filter.
This is natural, man. I mean, you could put a door on the bathroom.
That is, yeah, but the water being dirty is not, that's nature.
There's nothing you can do there.
They can't change the filter, man.
It doesn't have one.
Now keep in mind, this is 4,600 acres of woods.
One star from Ali has ticks. Really? In the woods where the deer one star from Ali, has ticks.
Really, in the woods, where the deer are.
That's where deer ticks.
Interesting, that's shocking to me.
I would've never thought that.
If they had bed bugs, we'd talk about it.
That would be original.
But this is crazy.
Did the lake have fish in it too?
Because we really could have a lot of talking to do here.
This is crazy.
You may bring it to your home from the park.
Yeah, if it's stuck to you.
Yeah, probably.
Check yourself.
Mariah, I guess it is, one star.
I love the sound of war while you're in nature.
Now you're gonna hear this.
A gun range is nestled inside this area,
and it's so close and loud we took our dogs home.
If you have PTSD or are sensitive to loud sounds
or just don't really enjoy a live battlefield,
go somewhere else.
Holy shit.
Also, if you've got kids out there
and you're worried about strays, don't show up.
Don't show up, well that's, we'll get to that.
I just picture some like Vietnam vet being like,
nestled like, oh, there's a hammock here
And this is beautiful and he lays and he goes finally
I've just I can finally let the sounds and the ways of the world just melt off of me and then just kaboom
I'm dying by any fucking jumps on the ground
This is a jack tripper hammock spin. Yeah
Candice one star I would probably never go back here unless my
kids wanted to do the ninja course the beach sand was wet very wet slash dirty
and stuck to everything like it was what like it was cheap sand it's not store
bought it's a fucking lake! That's what's there!
And she didn't like the quality of the sand around the lake and was complaining.
Like someone couldn't fix that.
Then the water was very mucky and it smelled.
You know, like a lake.
Lakes don't move, motherfucker, that's what happens.
My poor daughter came out of the water with a leech on her.
Oh Jesus.
That's gross.
But again, you're going into a fucking natural body of water that you can't see the bottom
of.
Anything could come out of there.
It was a very disappointing beach day.
Sure, sure.
Wow.
And then the- Cheap sand.
The Bald Mountain State Recreational Area responded to her and said, very sorry you
had that type of experience.
We normally do not get those types of complaints, you know, because they're fucking stupid.
They should have, I'm adding that for you, Bald Mountain.
I'm helping.
We usually don't get morons.
We usually don't get dipshits that don't understand how sand and water work, but I
don't know, you're here.
Welcome.
One star, extremely dangerous.
Please be warned, paper signs on trees at border of park state no shooting.
While hiking I experienced very close gunshots.
Oh Jesus, is that for me?
After calling to complain to park officials, they told me open hunting in the park is permitted.
What about the signs?
What about, you can't have people hiking and hunting
in the same place.
Those are fun.
Open hunting.
Do not visit this park with children, pets,
or anyone you care about.
No.
Yeah, don't bring a dog.
Don't bring a dog.
If I bring like Benny, they're gonna think
he's a black bear, or shoot him.
That's gonna be ridiculous.
Somebody's gonna think they got a big crusty rug.
I got him.
Ryan gives one star. Nasty, crowded, was in a rental while my car was in the shop so it didn't
have the passport I paid for. I said I would just buy one. He said to me $13 cash
or check. The kid probably didn't even know what a check was. Well if he takes them then he probably does because he's probably taken one before he's seen one
Yeah, I go to get money out of the ATM go back and now the price has changed
No 36 now change remind what he got 13 there give me 28, okay
Update I did go in the park.
Went to the boat launch where people with no boats
are cooking and fighting.
That's what I'm talking about.
Now we got some trash going on.
At the boat launch but no one here has a boat.
Instead they're barbecuing and beating the shit
out of each other.
I like it, that's fun.
Barbecuing and fighting.
Fighting, that's awesome. That's so Michigan. Went to the boat launch
where people with no boats are cooking and fighting. Launched my paddle board in the
swamp that is Trout Lake. I can't believe people swim in there. They come out with leeches
on them. Right. Don't get in it. Here. This is the best part. Paddled back to the launch.
People are still yelling and screaming the fight is not subsided
Well now they're drunk
Yeah, they've had time to drink. He went and did a whole thing. That's amazing
Me and my 11 year old got the hell out of there as soon as possible. I guess so
Then they responded. Hello, sir
I'm very sorry for your unpleasant experience at our entrance booth.
The miscommunication should not have happened.
I am confused.
You said our facility was nasty and crowded, but it sounds like you never went in.
It sounds like you did.
I don't think they kept that.
And then finally, last one here.
Here we go.
Last one, and it's just fucking hilarious because I've never heard this complaint of anywhere ever.
Amanda One Star, the fish kept biting us.
What?
What fish?
What fish?
What kind of fish?
What fucking fish bite?
I guess if you have like pickerel and shit like that,
they bite, like they're like fish, maybe you got.
But you would notice, they're big fangs,
you have a chunk taken out of you.
It's that little. They have a piranha bite, but there's the bottom of the Grand Canyon
I hiked down the bottom of that and those fish will they don't bite but but they suck you can feel like kissing your legs
It's not biting not by any stretch, but they're definitely licking you. I don't know what they're doing fish kept biting us and horseflies
Oh, yeah, that's gonna happen. Probably
kept biting us and horseflies. Oh yeah, that's gonna happen. They're probably dragonflies. And my son had a leech on him. Okay, nature has turned against you, go home. Oh man.
No, you're not made for nature, obviously. And leeches and fish biting you and horseflies and
every other goddamn thing. I don't think you're fucking cut out for the outdoor life is what it is. I do like the having a not only a shooting range on
premises so if there is nobody hunting or it's not hunting season you'll still
hear the constant sounds of gunfire explosions but then you can wander away
from the shooting range and just go through where people are hiking and
playing with children and hunt at will. Open hunting. Open hunting.
We definitely need to go hunting on that side,
hiking on this side.
No both.
I think they should be no hunting in a park
that allows people that are not hunting.
That have no interest in hunting.
You don't put hiking trails through
and then go open hunting too.
No, that's fucking crazy.
You're inviting trouble there.
You're asking for trouble. I't go hunt or hiking and go I should probably have the most noticeable neon clothing on the planet
Because I'm not worried about people hunting me
I hope not and what if somebody just wants to know what it feels like to kill a man
You know what I mean?
They could very easily say I thought it was a fucking deer like it's so easy to say that yeah
I don't trust people in the woods. I don't know what the hell these people are doing. He's wearing all brown They can very easily say, I thought it was a fucking deer. Like, it's so easy to say that.
I don't trust people in the woods.
I don't know what the hell these people are doing.
He's wearing all brown.
I thought he was a deer.
I thought he was a deer.
I saw his brown pubes and I thought, it must be.
He dyed his hair with brown Betty and I figured he must, must, must be an animal.
Unbelievable.
What a week.
What a week.
There you go everybody.
We've had our psychic readings.
We've been told by a sassy gay man to have our significant other wait outside.
We've seen poop at the grocery store.
That man wanted to bring pants into that bathroom.
That's why you have to buy them first because they don't want you to get shit on them.
Don't get shit on them.
Don't get shit on them.
There we go.
We have all that.
So we have had some fun this week, I would say.
It's been fun.
So thank you so much for listening, everybody.
Definitely tell everyone you know.
Post on social media.
Give five stars on whatever app you're listening on.
It helps a ton.
Say something nice about the show.
Be one of the good five-star reviews of a decent person.
Also, definitely listen to Crime in Sports and Small Town Murder, which are out every
single week, too, a week for Small Town Murder.
And keep coming back and hanging out with us every single week, everybody.
Thank you so much.
We'll see you next time.
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